#who's doing what

[rottenpumpkin13]

SAGZC are taking a math test. What happens then?

The SOLDIERs + Cloud Take A Math Test - Who's Doing What

• Angeal came prepared because he had been studying for days. He's confident in his abilities and is ready to ace this test!

• Genesis sits beside Angeal because he plans to cheat.

Zack: Alright! Let's do this! *opens the math test* WHY ARE THERE LETTERS? WHAT THE FUCK?

• Sephiroth isn't worried at all. The equations are simple enough, and certainly less difficult than the ones Hojo had him master at age 7.

• Cloud doesn't expect to get a good grade. He's never been great at math, so all he hopes for is a peaceful exam and to hopefully not get a 0.

• Zack is crying, the tears are smudging the ink on his test, making him cry harder.

• Zack's crying is disturbing Angeal, who's already stressed as shit because the equations are much harder than he expected. His eyes are wide and bloodshot as he stares at his test, rocking back and forth, gripping his pencil so hard it's bending.

Angeal: No....this can't be....I studied so hard....

• Angeal's mental breakdown is disrupting Genesis' cheating, so he whips around and tells Zack to quit sobbing.

Genesis: SHUT UP. YES, MATH HAS X'S AND Y'S.

Zack: But why are they jumbled up???

Genesis: That's a MATRIX.

Zack: WHAT DOES KEANU REEVES HAVE TO DO WITH THIS?

Sephiroth: Why are we talking about Director Reeve right now?

Genesis: Oh my god.

• Sephiroth has never done an easier test. He's effortlessly flying through the equations, humming happily as he solves them. Angeal is enraged.

Sephiroth, while doing the test: What a tedious test. I had been hoping for something more challenging to keep me busy. At this rate, I'll be done in 5 minutes.

Angeal: Hey, Sephiroth?

Sephiroth: Yes?

Angeal: No one gives a shit.

Sephiroth: .....

• Angeal watching Sephiroth's happiness is beneficial for Genesis, who is leaning over and avidly copying everything from Angeal's test.

• Cloud saw his first fraction and gave up. He's now doodling on the back of his test page.

• Zack is having a mental breakdown.

Zack: WHAT'S A QUADRATIC FORMULA? WHEN AM I GOING TO USE THIS IN MY DAILY LIFE??

• Cloud takes out crayons and is now coloring in his drawing.

• Sephiroth loudly proclaims he's finished. Angeal removes his boot and throws it at him.

• Cloud takes out some glitter glue and is peacefully decorating his drawing.

Zack: WHAT'S PI? I DON'T SEE PIE ON THIS TEST. IF I SAW PIE, I WOULDN'T BE CRYING.

• Sephiroth and Angeal are arguing loudly.

Sephiroth: How is it my fault you came unprepared for the exam?

Angeal: You rubbing it in my face is throwing me off! I can't even concentrate on my equations!

Sephiroth: I regret to inform you that from my vantage point I have a clear view of you solving every single equation wrong.

Genesis: SON OF A BITCH I TOLD YOU TO STUDY!

• Genesis gets up, grabs his chair and attacks Angeal with it. Angeal realizes Genesis had been cheating the whole time and is enraged. The two are now fighting.

• Cloud is now coloring in his drawing with scented markers!

• Sephiroth hears a noise and turns around to see Zack choking on his own test, that he shoved into his mouth.

• Sephiroth dives back and starts performing the heimlich maneuver on Zack.

• Angeal is attempting to murder Genesis.

• Cloud is humming Stamp's theme song as he colors his doodle.

• Lazard walks into the room and sees what's going on.

Lazard: Oh my god. Seriously!? Unacceptable. You all fail! Cloud, your exemplary behavior has earned you full marks on this test.

Cloud: Nice!

Angeal: ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

• Zack is still choking.

[bookwyrminspiration]

I can behave normally around books

[aropride]

interaction i have with shocking regularity is when someone’s complaining abt someone they know and theyre like “ughh they’re 21 and dont have a job and refuse to learn to drive” and then they remember who they’re talking to (me. 21 cant work cant drive) and go like

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

[lgbtlunaverse]

The world exists in such a baffling state of simultaneous sex-aversion and sex-hegemony. Every social platform on the internet is trying to banish sex workers to the shadow realm but I can't post a tweet without at least two bots replying P U S S Y I N B I O. People are self-censoring sex to seggs and $3× but every other ad you see is still filled with half-naked women. Rightwingers want queer people arrested for so much as existing in the same postal code as a child and are also drumming up a moral panic about how teenage boys aren't getting laid enough. I feel like I'm losing my mind.

[ered]

Here’s my take on the whole audio books vs. reading:

Oral tradition of storytelling predates written ones by millennias, and honestly, which one you like is just a personal preference.

The actual difference is

when listening, you have no idea how to write characters’ names

when reading, you have no idea how to pronounce characters’ names

hope this helps!

[zytes]

this manatee looks like it’s in a skyrim loading screen

[frankierotwinkdeath]

Y’all want Taylor Swift to be gay so bad but you won’t even write femslash about her

[julnites]

Red riding hood comic collab with the wonderful @yeehawpim (go check out their blog for loads of great comics!) 🌷 See the layouts he did here!

[ellierenae]

write unpublishable things. it's good for you.

[rottenpumpkin13]

ASGCZ attend Mario Kart. What happens?

AGSZC Play Mario Kart IRL - Who's Doing What

• Sephiroth is in the lead. Genesis is in 2nd place, Cloud is in 3rd, Zack in 4th and Angeal in 5th.

• Genesis runs Sephiroth off the road. Genesis is now in 1st place and Sephiroth is out of the race.

• Zack is paranoid that Angeal will catch up to him, so he hits him with a boomerang.

• This angers Angeal greatly.

• Genesis is smug. Suddenly Sephiroth appears and surpasses him. Genesis is flummoxed, because "HOW!?"

• Cloud is peacefully racing.

• Zack is still paranoid that Angeal will surpass him so he drops a banana peel.

• Genesis runs Sephiroth off the road again, "YES! IN THE LEAD ONCE MORE!"

• Angeal avoids the banana peel and is now focused on pursuing Zack. He doesn't care about the race anymore.

• Zack is crying.

• Cloud is peacefully racing.

• Sephiroth zooms past Genesis, alive once again.

• Genesis is starting to lose his mind because "HOW IS THIS MAN STILL ALIVE?"

• Zack throws a shell behind him, but it misses Angeal, bounces back and hits him instead. Angeal is caught up to him now.

• Genesis runs Sephiroth off the road again. This is fine, the finish line is just up ahead. Surely he'll win!

• Cloud is peacefully racing.

• Angeal is now glued to the back of Zack's kart but he's not doing anything, just staring. Zack throws another green shell, but Angeal somehow catches it and throws it back at Zack, causing him to run his kart off the road.

• Sephiroth appears in Genesis' backseat and starts choking him.

• Angeal quits the race and runs himself off the road to pursue Zack in the afterlife.

• Cloud is peacefully racing.

• Genesis runs his kart off the road with Sephiroth still choking him. Genesis and Sephiroth are now out of the race.

• Cloud is about to win!

• Sephiroth appears and throws a blue shell at Cloud before he can reach the finish line.

• Sephiroth wins the race.

[symphonyofsilence]

Let the poor man rest.

[trans-androgyne]

Genuinely, what happened to “feminism is for everyone”?

That’s the feminism I grew up with: encouraging people to recognize that fighting sexism and restrictive gender roles helps folks of every gender. We’d push back on the idea that feminists hate men, pointing to inclusive feminist literature and how many men are feminists.

Now, there are so many people insisting that the solution to patriarchy is to openly hate and ostracize men no matter what. Why? What is the benefit? It’s certainly not effective in fighting oppressive structures to exclude half the population from your cause on the basis of immutable traits. It may feel cathartic to say horrible things about men and try to punish them for your frustrations with patriarchy. But the only actual effect I see is the increasing right-wing radicalization of young men, who are being told that the left hates them for the way they were born and presented with an abundance of proof that it’s true.

Why are we going back to treating men and women as different species? It doesn’t fix things to say “well women are the good gender and men are the bad one” this time. If you sincerely want to dismantle sexism, you’re going to have to unpack and let go of all sex and gender essentialism—even that which considers women inherently pure and men inherently immoral.

[hinamie]

mentor

[daisywords]

One of my biggest nitpicks in fiction concerns the feeding of babies. Mothers dying during/shortly after childbirth or the baby being separated form the mother shortly after birth is pretty common in fiction. It is/was also common enough in real life, which is why I think a lot of writers/readers don't think too hard about this. however. Historically, the only reason the vast majority of babies survived being separated from their mother was because there was at least one other woman around to breastfeed them. Before modern formula, yes, people did use other substitutes, but they were rarely, if ever, nutritionally sufficient.

Newborns can't eat adult food. They can't really survive on animal milk. If your story takes place in a world before/without formula, a baby separated from its mother is going to either be nursed by someone else, or starve.

It doesn't have to be a huge plot point, but idk at least don't explicitly describe the situation as excluding the possibility of a wetnurse. "The father or the great grandmother or the neighbor man or the older sibling took and raised the baby completely alone in a cave for a year." Nope. That baby is dead I'm sorry. "The baby was kidnapped shortly after birth by a wizard and hidden away in a secret tower" um quick question was the wizard lactating? "The mother refused to see or touch her child after birth so the baby was left to the care of the ailing grandfather" the grandfather who made the necessary arrangements with women in the neighborhood, right? right? OR THAT GREAT OFFENDER "A newborn baby was left on the doorstep and they brought it in and took care of it no issues" What Are You Going to Feed That Baby. Hello?

Like. It's not impossible, but arrangements are going to have to be made. There are some logistics.

[inkskinned]

this is just my opinion but i think any good media needs obsession behind it. it needs passion, the kind of passion that's no longer "gentle scented candle" and is now "oh shit the house caught on fire". it needs a creator that's biting the floorboards and gnawing the story off their skin. creators are supposed to be wild animals. they are supposed to want to tell a story with the ferocity of eating a good stone fruit while standing over the sink. the same protective, strange instinct as being 7 and making mud potions in pink teacups: you gotta get weird with it.

good media needs unhinged, googling-at-midnight kind of energy. it needs "what kind of seams are invented on this planet" energy and "im just gonna trust the audience to roll with me about this" energy. it needs one person (at least) screaming into the void with so much drive and energy that it forces the story to be real.

sometimes people are baffled when fanfic has some stunning jaw-dropping tattoo-it-on-you lines. and i'm like - well, i don't go here, but that makes sense to me. of fucking course people who have this amount of passion are going to create something good. they moved from a place of genuine love and enjoyment.

so yeah, duh! saturday cartoons have banger lines. random street art is sometimes the most precious heart-wrenching shit you've ever seen. someone singing on tiktok ends up creating your next favorite song. youtubers are giving us 5 hours of carefully researched content. all of this is the impossible equation to latestage capitalism. like, you can't force something to be good. AI cannot make it good. no amount of focus-group testing or market research. what makes a story worth listening to is that someone cares so much about telling it - through dance, art, music, whatever it takes - that they are just a little unhinged about it.

one time my friend told me he stayed up all night researching how many ways there are to peel an orange. he wrote me a poem that made me cry on public transportation. the love came through it like pith, you know? the words all came apart in my hands. it tasted like breakfast.