#who? in this day and age? in the most important american city? doesn't have at least have a reasonable vegan option??

[unopenablebox]

lmao i have a call with a wedding venue coordinator tomorrow?? lots of things about this place are appealing but it also has a massively overpriced mandatory caterer and a very late event start time (who has the ceremony start at 6:30pm?? don't people want dinner????) so i kind of just wanted, you know, a quote and contact info in case we wanted to tour later if other things don't pan out. but the person who reached out to me was so confident that we were going to call this week that i guess... i'm going to call her? and ask about chair rental prices or something? idk man. i wasn't prepared for this. i'm not even the one primarily planning this wedding and also we're not even planning yet i just had time to send idle emails this week

[alj4890]

The Date

(Tobias Carrick x F!MC) in a Choices Open Heart drabble for Day 1 of Tobias Carrick x Appreciation Week.

@tobias-carrick-appreciation-week @jerzwriter @hopelessromantic1352 @choicesficwriterscreations

Rating: G for nothing but fluff in this fic/head canon of the Carrick family

Masterlist

A/N My head canon for Tobias's background is that he comes from a wealthy, successful family. With his confidence and almost love of the chase when it comes to He and Ethan and the MC going after high profile patients leads me to believe Tobias having parents who instilled that love of butting heads and always challenging yourself. Plus since Ethan has an enjoyment of the finer things in life, i.e. the top shelf scotch and opera, and he doesn't come from money; I think he learned about that way of life through his friendship with Tobias in college. So in this drabble (which takes place before the attack in Book 2 and part of my storyline of Tobias and the MC dating since she and Aurora encountered him at the diner in Book 2) my MC, Chris, will be his date for his mother's wedding

Tobias Carrick's Family

Home: Greenwich, Connecticut

Father: Marcus Carrick*deceased*- was one of the highest paid corporate lawyers in New York City. He died from a heart attack during Tobias's first year in med school.

Mother: Celeste Carrick- a retired interior designer. Spends most of her free time with her grandchildren or taking part in the social scene in Greenwich.

Older Brother: Hugh Carrick- a highly successful corporate lawyer. Married to Vericona Deloache who owns one of New York's top bakeries. The two met when Hugh went to her bakery one afternoon for some needed comfort food. They have three children under the age of ten: Katelyn, Abigail, and Marcus.

Younger Brother: Phillip Carrick- highly respected American history professor at Yale. He's married to Jasmine Cho, an Art History professor at Yale. The two met one rainy afternoon when they were both rushing across the Hewitt Quad and bumped into each other. They have two children under the age of five: four year old Tabitha, and eight month old Tobey (named after his uncle for saving Phillip's life from drowning when they were children)

The Carrick home in Greenwich, Connecticut...

"How was the drive down?"

Tobias dragged his attention away from Chris playing outside with his nieces and nephews to answer his older brother, Hugh.

"Great. Not a lot of traffic."

His younger brother, Phillip, joined them.

"Chris seems to be winning over our most judgmental members of the family."

Tobias snorted in amusement. That was an understatement if ever he heard one. Not one of the latest generation of Carrick's gave outsiders an easy time. Nannies, teachers, and coaches had to work overtime to try and win their trust and smiles.

The squeals of laughter followed by them all shouting Chris's name along with them practically hanging off of her let them all know this was a pretty big deal. Four small bodies were wrapped around her arms and legs.

Tobias saw his mother, Celeste, beaming as she laughed at the sight. She was holding the youngest of her grandchildren, eight months old Tobey, who was doing all he could to wiggle out of her arms and join in on the fun.

Hugh and Phillip's wives, Veronica and Jasmine, were also laughing while trying to tell their children to ease up before they broke Chris.

"So..." Hugh's smirk grew. "Chris must be important to you."

Phillip nudged Tobias on the other side. "When's the last time you brought a woman home to meet the family?"

Tobias merely smiled.

Hugh being the successful lawyer of the family chuckled over his silence. "I see we have an evasive witness, Phil."

"That's more your department than mine," Phillip teased. "I've learned that when he refuses to talk, there's little we can do to get him to answer other than blackmail."

Hugh laughed out loud. "I know just the thing."

Before his brothers could question him, he dashed upstairs. He returned with a photo album that Tobias immediately recognized.

"Is that-?"

"It is." Hugh replied with evil glee. "Every shred of evidence is in here."

Tobias's efforts to snatch the album that held pictures of his less than intelligent decisions as a teenager away from Hugh was thwarted by Phillip playing interference.

"Answer the question or I show Chris this album." Hugh threatened.

"All right!" Tobias held his hands up in surrender with a smile. "Yes, Chris is very important to me which is why I brought her here as my date for Mom's wedding."

"About time you got tied down like the rest of us." Hugh joked. "I was worried you'd be left out of monogamous bliss."

"Ha. Ha." Tobias poured them each a drink. "You two already found what I assumed were the only women on the planet willing and able to deal with a Carrick. I'm just as surprised as you are that I found Chris."

His attention drifted back outside to see Chris drop down on one of the lounge chairs beside his mom. Without any hesitation, she took Tobey in her arms the moment he reached for her. Her tender smile grew softer as he snuggled his head against her shoulder. One little fist held a lock of her red hair as he began to fall asleep.

"That settles it." Phillip shook his head in pity. "Sorry Tobias, but I'm kidnapping Chris and am going to keep her until Tobey goes to college."

"No can do, Phillip." Hugh chortled. "Veronica already staked her claim on her. Our three have never reacted that way to an outsider before."

"I think there's only one Carrick that she's willing to be kept by." Tobias remarked on his way outside. "And it isn't either of you."

***************

"And he's out." Jasmine whispered. "He should sleep the whole night after the day he's had."

She gently untangled Tobey's little fingers from Chris's hair then took him in her arms.

"He's a sweetheart." Chris replied, her soft smile still directed on the baby.

Jasmine beamed at her before slipping back inside with Tabitha following close behind her.

Veronica got to her feet and called her bunch over to begin the long process of getting everyone settled for the night.

Tobias chuckled over their groans as he held the door open for them.

Celeste watched her son settle down close to Chris with a great deal of amused interest.

"Did they wear you out?" He teased.

Chris laughed, slouching against him. "I've never had such a workout in my life."

She cuddled closer to his side when his arm slipped around her shoulders.

"They are a lot of fun." She added. "I just need more energy to keep up."

"Now you know why I have so many coffee makers in my kitchen." Celeste teased. "Those five require my energy plus any that can be manufactured."

She got to her feet, smiling down at them. "I think I'll also turn in."

"Can't have the bride-to-be exhausted for the rehearsal." Tobias teased. "Is the groom aware what awaits him?"

Celeste chuckled as she leaned down to hug him.

"Trust me. Roger knows how much work goes into being with a Carrick."

She reached over and hugged Chris.

"I am thrilled you came along with Tobias."

"I couldn't miss the chance to see where he came from." Chris's smile held mischief. "And to see what made him the man he is today."

"Amazing, isn't it?" Celeste replied. "Who knew this much confidence could be put in one man."

Tobias groaned, dropping his head back.

"My brothers aren't exactly humble."

"True." Celeste tapped her chin while studying him. "Must be your father's genes."

"Ha. Ha." He shooed her away. "Get out of here so I can convince Chris I'm not that bad."

"I don't think I need much convincing." Chris slipped her hand in his.

Celeste observed her son's smile bloom as he turned toward the young woman he'd brought home. She couldn't help but be thankful that Tobias had finally met someone who knew just what he needed.

A playful, yet tender heart.

"Goodnight, dears." She slipped away to tell her other sons her opinion.

"Well?" Hugh asked once the door was shut.

Phillip propped his elbows on the bar. "What do you think of them together, Mom?"

Celeste glanced over her shoulder at the shadowed couple cuddled together on the lounge chair.

"I think there will be another Carrick wedding before too long."

******************

Belle Haven Country Club...

Tobias took a moment to get off by himself. After dancing for the fourth time with his nieces, he'd slipped outside to consider all the changes in his life. Glancing back at the club, he could see those he loved through the glass doors.

So many smiles flashed with muffled laughter tinkling with the muted sounds of music. He saw his brothers with their wives, Hugh dancing with his Veronica while Phillip talked to a group with his hand holding Jasmine's. His mother was once again holding little Tobey, laughing at Roger's attempts to make the baby laugh. It was all how it should be for a night of celebrating.

He was happy and yet a part of him longed for something.

One of the doors opening drew his attention.

"I'm escaping." Chris explained. "I've told all the funny and gross medical stories I know of to your neighbors."

Tobias chuckled as he placed his arm around her, drawing her close to his chest.

"Welcome to Greenwich."

"Thanks."

Chris wrapped her arms around his waist. Her eyes drifted over his face, brow puckering with concern.

"What's wrong?" She asked.

"Nothing." He promptly responded.

"Tobias."

"I don't know, Chris. I don't know what's wrong with me." His eyes narrowed as he tried to think of a way to explain what he felt.

"Is it because things are changing?" She asked. "You seemed shocked when Hugh explained your mom's plans with the house and all."

He slowly nodded. "I guess that's it."

He had been floored and yet he knew he shouldn't be. After all, he knew Roger would want to create a home with his mom without memories of his father at every turn. He even supported it. And as if Celeste knew her sons would need their childhood home to remain as it was, she'd decided to keep it and use it for just their holiday gatherings and when the grandchildren wanted to spend the night.

The thought that the house would remain for the most part empty hurt. It was almost like the moment his father's coffin had been shut. It was final. There was no returning to what once was.

Chris rested her cheek against his chest, holding him closer than before.

He set his drink down and wrapped both arms around her, accepting this quiet comfort she gave so freely.

It was just like her to not try and reason with him over a feeling that couldn't be easily explained. She allowed him to feel it without the guilt of being childish or foolish all while doing her utmost to comfort him.

"I love you, Chris."

She propped her chin on his chest, smiling up at him.

"You better."

He laughed, feeling more of his tension melt off.

She kissed him in the midst of his laugh.

"I love you, too." She whispered against his lips.

He moaned softly at the heat of their next kiss. The stray thought of his earlier conversation with Hugh about the house came to mind.

While Chris was talking to Vericona, Hugh lowered his voice.

"I think Mom's hoping you'll eventually want to move into the house."

"Me? Why? I work in Boston. That house is too big for a single man."

"Not just you." Hugh gave him a look of exasperation. "You and your family."

Tobias choked on his drink.

"And here we thought you were smart." Hugh teased, thumping him on the back.

Tobias glared at him as he tried to breathe through the burn his whiskey sour left throughout his nose and throat.

"Anyway," Hugh was unfazed by the glare, "She's already had me put the house in a trust for all of us. Between it and the prenup, she is making sure that everything she and Dad have goes to us and our children."

"Roger agreed to that?"

"He did." Hugh shook his head slowly as if in disbelief. "Then he had me write that the majority of his fortune goes to Mom upon his death."

"Really?" Tobias looked over at the couple. "I knew he'd had a crush on her in high school. But to go that far after fifty some odd years apart..."

"The power of love." Hugh shrugged. "The kids like him."

"That's a good sign."

"Mom wouldn't have gone on another date with him if they hadn't."

They both watched the couple share a slow dance.

"It's good she won't be alone so much." Hugh whispered.

Tobias nodded in agreement.

As he kissed Chris, he began to think about what his childhood home would be like as his own. He could imagine the voices of children echoing through the halls as they got ready for a visit from their family. He could picture a few of them with red hair running down the stairs to greet him after a long day of work.

And he could easily see Chris there, adding even more memories to the precious ones he held.

"Chris?"

"Hmm?"

"You think you'd ever want to leave Boston?"

"And go where?"

"Maybe here?"

"Greenwich?"

"Yes."

She contemplated it for a few seconds.

"I could see myself doing that." She caressed his cheek. "After all, I know of a great family that lives close by."

"You should meet their middle son." He teased.

Her lips twitched with mirth. "Really? And why is that?"

"He's a great guy. Handsome. Utterly charming. Brilliant diagnostician." He explained.

"Wow. I've always wanted to meet a man like that." She eased out of his arms with a flirty smile. "I had no idea that the Mitchell's had a doctor in the family."

Tobias squeezed a laugh out of her while he began to tickle her for such a statement about one of the neighbors.

"Tobias!" She squealed when his hand drifted down her highly sensitive rib cage once more.

"Which family has the handsome, charming doctor?" He growled against her neck.

"The Carrick's do." She breathlessly replied.

"Damn right they do." He kissed her once more.

"Would you like to stay out here or go back inside?" She asked.

"Which would you prefer?"

"I don't mind either way." Chris rested her head on his shoulder. "I'll go wherever you want."

Tobias pressed a tender kiss to her forehead, grateful and amazed that he'd found someone like her.

"We'll go back inside. It's a party after all."

"I wouldn't be opposed to sneaking back out here." Chris winked at him as she looped her arm through his. "Especially if someone joins me for illicit kisses."

"I know just the man for the job." He replied.

Chris hugged his arm.

"I thought you would."

[gentlemanviolet]

Hello! Story time! until I actually got there! Because I'm permashifting!! Yayy

Today I'm gonna talk abt my bestie

First of all, my eng sucks cuz it's my second language

The girl in my profile picture is my bestie

She's so beautiful, isn't she?

Her name is Song Ji-hyo

We've been friends since kindergarten, in America, she's Korean in this reality but in mine, she's a korean who was born in America so technically she's an American

My ass had to move to Korea and America or America and Korea literally everytime but she always followed where I go and never let me be alone<3

So basically we go to both American school and Korean school (of course different year),

I forgot to tell y'all that, in my dr, humans can't die (including pets), we don't kill those animals to eat but we only eat them when they die by themselves, ghosts don't exist, no murdering, no war, no homeless, no starving dogs or cats, no world hunger, and humans don't age badly (like vampires)

So let's get back to talk abt me and my bestie

Of course I tell her that "I shifted here" and explain her what is shifting as soon as I got there

We both are super rich but we live in a condo, she lives next door, my room no. is 222 and hers is 111 (I wanted mine to be 777 cuz it's beautiful but I thought abt my bestie so i'll just take 222), and I know if she lives besides my door, it can't be 111 but idc how things work, I just want it to be like that

We go to parties that invited us, literally every saturday and sunday night

We dress THE best

We have the healthiest friendship EVER, we want each other to look PERFECT

And the most important thing is that we can pull anyone, we have different tastes in men, AND anyone who she has a crush on, doesn't gaf abt me and anyone who I have a crush one doesn't gaf abt her, so yeah, that's why our friendship.

Yeah, I didn't script out things like... heartbreak, getting cheat, meeting red flags, because if i script those out, my life would be so robotic

We have time for each other, we always video chat when we're in different country or city for work

I'm an actress and a singer and she's an actress so basically we both are actresses, so of course there's some movies/shows that both of us are in

And of course we do silly things on set and love to annoy the workers, but WE ARE NOT CHILDISH LIKE THAT WHEN WE ARE NOT WORKING TOGETHER

We're professionals until we're working in a project together, but when we're not in mood or annoyed because of something, we act normal and professional even tho we're together in the same project, we be put on our serious face and talking to each other looking like lawyers focusing really hard to defend their murderer client

We hang out and go shopping in our holidays

We gossip abt celebrities that hates me or her, or celebrities that we hate, and we LOVE planning trips even tho we don't have time for that

We both are busy during day but we wacth movies every night at neither her condo room that is next door or at my condo room, we just sleep together without going back to our room

There's a thing that I HATE when she do that, it's when we're at a party and a random famous guy that almost everyone knows that he likes me, come and talk to me, she always left me alone with him only to TEASE ME AND MAKE ME AWKWARD, LIKE...I KNOWWW THAT GUY IS ATTRACTIVE BUT ITS AWKWARD!!??!!

Sometimes I revenge her when I get a chance😈

But those things are just annoying, we don't have each other<3, but only when she told someone to call my phone when I really hate talking to someone because I'm not good at keeping the conversion alive, and she do this especially when I'm on the f♥cking toilet<3

Jk it's only annoying but I don't hate her

She's also annoyed when I stole her money when it's the only cash left because both of us don't have cash but only rich in our cards

I love love LOVE me and her's friendship, it's the most expensive and the best thing I ever had in my entire life.

I love you so much bestie, sometimes I might swear at you (you also do that) but I love you more than anything in the whole world<3

[davethomas11]

Why Does Gift Basket Make the Perfect Gift Basket in Toronto, Canada?

Gift-giving is an old age that has always been an important part of our human culture. Whether it is to celebrate a special occasion, show appreciation, or express love, a thoughtful gift can make a long-lasting impression.

According to a report, "the North American gift market is likely to increase from US$ 1439.8 million to US$ 1673 million till 2030.

So, one of the most popular and versatile gift options is the gift basket. In a city as diverse and vibrant as Toronto, Canada, gift baskets have become a favorite for both personal and corporate gifting.

These gifting companies offer a unique blend of variety, customization, and thoughtfulness, making them perfect for any occasion. 

In this blog, we will explore the most popular types of gift baskets in Toronto, Canada, you can find.

What Types of Gift Baskets are Available in Toronto, Canada?

Toronto is home to a diverse range of gift baskets, each designed to cater to different tastes, preferences, and occasions. Below are some of the most popular types of gift baskets in Toronto, Canada, you can find. 

1. Gourmet Food Gift Basket: Gourmet food gift baskets are a popular choice in Toronto, especially for food lovers and those who appreciate high-quality, artisanal items.

This basket often features a carefully served selection of gourmet chocolates, cheeses, crackers, jams, and other premium snacks.

They are perfect for housewarming gifts, corporate events, or any occasion where you want to impress with a touch of luxury.

Gift Baskets in Toronto, Canada, offers a wide range of gourmet baskets that include everything from fine wines to handcrafted treats, making them an excellent choice for any foodie.

2. Chocolate and Sweet Treat Gift Baskets: Who doesn't love chocolates? Chocolate gift baskets are a strong match to bring a smile to anyone's face. 

These baskets are filled with a decadent assortment of chocolates, truffles, fudge, and other sweet treats. These gifts are perfect for birthdays or Valentine's Day; chocolate baskets are a popular option in Toronto.

3. Spa and Wellness Gift Baskets: In today's busy world, we all need a little time to relax and self-love. These baskets typically include items like bath salts, scented candles, lotions, and other pampering products that create a spa-like experience at home.

They are perfect for Mother's Day, birthdays, or as a thoughtful gift for someone who deserves a little self-care. 

4. Corporate Gift Baskets: Corporate gift baskets are an excellent way for businesses to show appreciation to their clients, employees, or partners.

In Toronto, corporate gift baskets often include a mix of gourmet foods, fine wines, and branded merchandise, making them a classy and professional gift. 

Many companies offer customization options that allow the business to incorporate their branding or specific items that reflect their corporate identity. These baskets help strengthen business relationships and are a great way to thank you professionally.

5. Baby Gift Baskets: Welcome a new baby into the world is a joyful occasion, and baby gift baskets are the perfect way to celebrate. These baskets typically include baby essentials like clothing, blankets, toys, and sometimes even treats for the new parents.

The baby basket is a thoughtful way to congratulate new parents and provide them with useful items that they will appreciate during this exciting time.

Gift baskets in Toronto, Canada, offer a wide range of baby-themed baskets that can be personalized with the baby's name or other special touches.

Final Thoughts: 

Gift baskets in Toronto, Canada, are more than just a convenient gift option—they offer a personal and thoughtful way to celebrate life’s special moments.

Whether you’re marking a birthday, holiday, corporate milestone, or just want to show someone you care, there’s a gift basket that perfectly fits the occasion.

Explore the wide range of gift baskets available at Glitter Gift Baskets and find the perfect gift for your loved ones.

Whether you are in Toronto or sending a gift to someone in the city, Giltter Gift Baskets offers a wide range of options that will make any occasion unforgettable.

Visit their website to find out more about gift baskets!

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[meanwhileinstasiville]

A life expectancy of 17

Age: Poor

Ethnicity: Poor

Gender: Poor

Sexual orientation: Can't afford it

A whole neighborhood can put up for a ball. Some play basketball.

Elementary school; everything is covered, food, books, time, materials of all kinds. All you gotta do is *show up*. Eating costs like a dollar per day.

Middle school; *some* things are covered. Sports? Used equipment or you don't play; see basketball. Soccer? Maybe. Probably not, not enough food at home to run that much. Some school programs without up front costs? Until they present up front costs. Hand me downs, and then baseball, maybe. And get good or get out.

Highschool: *nothing* is covered. If you couldn't do it in middle school, you *can't* do it in highschool. So if you weren't the guy with the best ball handling back in elementary school, sports are out. (And yes, this could've been a meme) And *this is important since everyone hates republicans now*

Democrats have it that *only densely populated places* matter. Somewhere between the "donut hole" of "the inner cities" where "ball is life" say black people, and the rural areas outside the major cities, where *everyone else lives* and all those rural counties *add the fuck* up.

College: Is after seventeen, and doesn't exist.

So, democracy can have this thing where *people stop maturing* when they can no longer afford (age makes things more expensive) the next grade level.

(Italians stopped at the third grade for a *painfully long time* in American history; Mexicans stopped whenever they could get a work permit, and that's middle school; black people who didn't become star athletes or varsity sports, stopped senior year. They end after highschool. AND, rural white people, even the most affluent and privileged ones, can suffer the same fate because there's no access.)

Grow the fuck up: They literally couldn't afford it.

[lindsayrps]

reid mcconnell development

BASIC INFORMATION

FULL NAME: reid matthew mcconnell NICKNAME(S): none, really. PREFERRED NAME(S): reid BIRTH DATE: september 28, 1999 AGE: 22. GENDER: cis male PRONOUNS: he/him ROMANTIC/SEXUAL ORIENTATION: heterosexual/romantic NATIONALITY: american ETHNICITY: white CURRENT LOCATION: manhattan, new york LIVING SITUATION: a 2 bed 2 bath on fifth avenue. he uses the second bedroom as a landing space for his friends when they need the space.

BACKGROUND

BIRTH PLACE: new york HOMETOWN: new york PLACES LIVED: he's been exclusively a new yorker since birth but he's spent time in other places for vacations but nothing long term SOCIAL CLASS: upper class EDUCATION LEVEL: business degree from university FATHER: thomas mcconnell MOTHER: cora mcconnell SIBLING(S): none BIRTH ORDER: only child CHILDREN: no PET(S): none OTHER IMPORTANT RELATIVES: though not technically related, he considers his three closest friends to be as much like family and, therefore, brother as he'll ever get. PREVIOUS RELATIONSHIPS: none insofar as anything being serious—he's been infatuated with a girl, roselyn, who 100% does not feel the same way ARRESTS: no PRISON TIME?: no

OCCUPATION & INCOME

PRIMARY SOURCE OF INCOME: mostly, a trust fund. his parents were fine with him not getting a job during university/afterwards and let him do whatever he wants with his idiot friends so long as he promised to take over one day like they'd wanted him to and worked towards a business degree, so he did. CONTENT WITH THEIR JOB (OR LACK THEREOF): in an ideal world, it's perfect, but, you know, realistically, he wants to do something on his own merit but yanno, whip out the mcconnell surname and suddenly everyone acts like your best friend like they weren't just being rude to him five minutes ago. PAST JOB(S): — SPENDING HABITS: fairly even keel for someone with access to as much money as he has, not to say he doesn't splurge on things from time to time but it's far less frequent than probably expected. MOST VALUABLE POSSESSION: his watch

SKILLS & ABILITIES

PHYSICAL STRENGTH: average SPEED: depends on how much trouble he's in INTELLIGENCE: he's like himbo adjacent. he's not entirely without a brain he just chooses to not use it a lot of the time. TEAMWORK: by virtue of being an only child, he's better at doing things by himself, but, hey, he's not bad at things either. TALENTS: he really doesn't do anything partially. if he agrees to something, he sees it through. if he says it, he means it. SHORTCOMINGS: man can talk smack when he wants to, probably doesn't think things totally through before doing them, always jumps in head first with everything. LANGUAGE(S) SPOKEN: english, a bit of spanish/french. DRIVE?: yes but in the city, he really doesn't have to. JUMP START A CAR?: yes CHANGE A FLAT TIRE?: yes RIDE A BICYCLE?: yes SWIM?: yes PLAY AN INSTRUMENT?: no PLAY CHESS?: yes BRAID HAIR?: no TIE A TIE?: yes PICK A LOCK?: yes

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE & CHARACTERISTICS

FACE CLAIM: christopher briney EYE COLOR: blue HAIR COLOR: brown HAIR TYPE/STYLE: shawn hunter in the early days of bmw. kinda floppy but endearingly so. GLASSES/CONTACTS?: no/no DOMINANT HAND: right HEIGHT: 6'1 BUILD: normal? idk EXERCISE HABITS: look he would rather not so he's not like pumping iron at the gym every day but someone is going to make him work out somehow and it is Just Going To Happen SKIN TONE: TATTOOS: none PIERCINGS: none NOTABLE FEATURES: the eyes, man. the hair, also. USUAL EXPRESSION: a step above resting bitch face. definitely doesn't look like he wants to murder you but won't look the happiest either CLOTHING STYLE: this depends on who he's around. more dressed up around family, button ups done the right way, nice pants, shoes. when he's around friends, it's far more casual, far more relaxed, esp. when it comes to still wearing businesswear, as it were. JEWELRY: n/a ALLERGIES: n/a DIET: everything in moderation. life's short, why deny yourself things like pizza and tacos. PHYSICAL AILMENTS: n/a

PSYCHOLOGY

ENNEAGRAM TYPE: 4 MORAL ALIGNMENT: chaotic neutral TEMPERAMENT: choleric SOCIABILITY: extrovert EMOTIONAL STABILITY: he relies more on his heart than his head so, yeah. DRUG USE: a smoke here and there, but that's it ALCOHOL USE: socially PRONE TO VIOLENCE?: not in a serious way, no.

MANNERISMS

SPEECH STYLE: thoughtful and measured, around those he doesn't know all that well/are much older than him, more loose with people his own age/his friends. ACCENT: he would say he doesn't have one, really. HOBBIES: reading, exploring, making ill advised bets on games of pool with his friends. DRIVES/MOTIVATIONS: having something of his own, earned on his own merit. FEARS: never being his own person POSITIVE TRAITS: intelligent (when he's got the brain cell), witty, sensitive NEGATIVE TRAITS: impulsive, quick-tempered, immature, at times, impetuous SENSE OF HUMOR: light, fun, it's not hard to make him laugh, either, but he much prefers making other people laugh DO THEY CURSE OFTEN?: nah

FAVORITES

ACTIVITY: being around his friends. it doesn't matter what they're doing, just being with them is enough. ANIMAL: cats bc they're self sufficient for the most part BEVERAGE: coffee BOOK: great gatsby COLOR: steel blue DESIGNER: tom ford FOOD: french toast GEM: sapphire HOLIDAY: holidays have not been celebrated traditionally since he was a child and even then it was pretty questionable. MODE OF TRANSPORTATION: driving when he can, subway otherwise. MOVIE: roman hoilday but shh MUSICAL ARTIST: børns SCENERY: waterscapes SCENT: rain TELEVISION SHOW: ted lasso WEATHER: winter VACATION DESTINATION: anywhere but new york

ATTITUDES

GREATEST DREAM: see drives/motivation. though he's promised to take over one day, he also kind of doesn't want to, bc that's a lot of pressure and expectation and he hasn't really earned it. GREATEST FEAR: being a one trick pony MOST AT EASE WHEN: around his friends/people he loves (for the most part), on the roof of his building by himself. LEAST AT EASE WHEN: honestly in any business setting which... BIGGEST REGRET: hmm pre-emptively agreeing to take over a business he really doesn't want anything to do with but yanno. TOP PRIORITIES: lol

[1dfangirls35]

The Language of Your Soul

An enemies to lovers Ballet AU in 5 Acts

Masterlist

Act I

A/N:

First of all, thank you so much to @booksncoffee for the absolutely gorgeous banner!

I am so excited to share this story with you all! Inspired in part by a night rewatching Center Stage on Netflix and from years of ballet classes, I hope this AU brings a new twist on Harry fics (and maybe even helps you gain a new appreciation for the world of ballet). Please note, while I have used my own 10+ years of classical ballet training in addition to research on this topic to hopefully make this as realistic as possible, this is still a work of fiction- and some details may have been changed to better fit the constraints of the story. The companies mentioned in this fic are real, however this story and its characters are entirely works of fiction. On a more personal note, while I have chosen to publish this story now and believe I will be able to maintain weekly updates to its entirety, I am preparing to take my boards in less than four weeks. Should I not update as scheduled- please be patient and know that an update is only a few weeks away! :) Thank you so much for reading!

Warnings: This story will contain language, mentions of emotional abuse from a parent and eating disorders. Please read at your own discretion.

Ten Weeks to Opening Night

Albert Einstein once said, "dancers are the athletes of God." Giselle Mason certainly doesn't feel like pne of God's athletes at the moment. Not with the way her muscles are screaming with every movement that she makes as she stretches before class, not with the way her right hip cracks as she lifts her leg onto the bar, and certainly not with the way her feet sting as she tapes up yet another blister on her toe before shoving her foot into her pointe shoes for another day full of torture.

Giselle stands, sticking one last bobby pin into the bun of her nearly ebony hair and finding her spot at the front of the barre in the center of the studio. She grasps the wooden cylinder with her left hand before releasing her body in a forward bend, taking a deep breath in and then a deep breath out. There is a familiar ache in her hamstrings as she begins to stretch, which loosens ever so slightly with every breath.

And so begins her daily morning routine in the studio. Fifteen minutes of stretching before company class begins. Relaxing each hamstring, hip flexor and spinal muscle until a sense of calm washes over her body. Letting her mind drift into a thoughtless focus, preparing itself for the waves of choreography that would be coming in minutes. Typically, this time is quiet; the only melody present the rhythmic breathing of company members preparing for class. But today, the studio seems to be filled with an underlying buzz. And Giselle doesn't have the slightest idea why.

"I heard he slept with the artistic director's wife, so they kicked him out of the Royal," she hears one of the new corps de ballet members murmur.

"I mean have you seen him, I don't blame her for getting her hands on a piece of him," another girl giggles.

"Did you hear, G?" Caleb, Giselle's friend, whispers as he slides into a spot on the barre behind her, adjusting the black bandana keeping his signature black curls in place across his forehead.

"Hear what?" Giselle asks, removing her leg from the bar before reaching down to adjust the black leg warmer that had fallen down her calf.

"They've hired Harry Styles- you know from the Royal," Caleb adds as if Giselle hasn't heard of Harry Styles. Everyone who was anyone in the ballet world had heard of Harry Styles. A good chunk of the non-ballet world might even be able to point him out as that 'sexy male ballet dancer' from the Sports Illustrated nude edition.

Harry Styles was a rare kind of natural talent. The type of person that was put on this earth to dance ballet. His talent had landed him the honor of being the youngest person to be named a principal in the history of the Royal Ballet. And if the rumors were true, that talent had also landed him the reputation of one of the ballet world's most arrogant. Giselle had heard several stories about how the male dancer had been a terror to work with- demanding, rude, uncooperative. Giselle didn't doubt it- people of that skill and fame rarely developed without some sense of entitlement.

"Why would we hire Harry Styles, we've already got Viktor?" Giselle questions. This isn't the first time a rumor has circulated through the American Ballet Theatre company, and it certainly won't be the last time. 

"Rumor is they want Viktor to retire," Caleb shrugged before stepping back to his place behind Giselle as Mistress Ivanova claps to gain the class's attention.

Giselle couldn't believe the rumors. Viktor Dmitri retiring from ABT? He was practically the face of the company. The man had been dancing for the American Ballet Theatre for over a decade. He'd been the principal ever since Giselle had joined the company as a corps de ballet member five years ago. 

Giselle knew that retirement came early for a ballet dancer. Her own mother, the famous Natalia Korsakova, had retired at the age of 33 after a knee injury. Viktor had just turned 35, but he'd shown no signs of slowing down. She refused to believe that he was calling it quits. Or to believe that the board would be stupid enough to bring in someone with Harry Styles's toxic reputation into the company.

She shoves the thought aside. Viktor is in his usual place at the back of the studio and Harry Styles is nowhere to be seen. This was simply another piece of gossip threatening to distract everyone from the Swan Lake auditions tomorrow afternoon, and Giselle won't lose her focus. The auditions are too important.

Giselle Mason has dreamed of playing the role of Odette/Odile ever since she first watched her mother on stage at the age of four. It was one of her earliest memories of the theater- her mother twirling about in a bright white tutu that at that time Giselle could only dream of wearing. In fact, Giselle wasn't sure there had ever been a moment where her dream hadn't been to be a principal dancer at ABT, like her mother. She'd been in ballet shoes from the second she could walk, wore a leotard and tights more often than she'd worn pajamas, and didn't recognize herself in the mirror if her hair wasn't pulled back into a bun. She'd ate, slept and breathed the art form. But she supposed that all came with having a prima ballerina as a mother.

Natalia Korsakova was a ballet sensation. "One of the greatest to have ever danced," according to the New York Times  at the time of her retirement. The world had come to watch her dance and she'd traveled it performing: Russia, Australia, London, Paris. You name the location and Natalia Korsakova had danced there.

When Giselle was growing up, she was constantly told how lucky she was to have Natalia as a mother. To have seen the shows she's seen, to have met ballet royalty, to have traveled the world. But Giselle never felt lucky. Not when she was the accident that put her mother's career on hold for almost a year. Not when her mother was gone for months at a time performing, missing recitals, parent days and school concerts. And certainly not when an injury forced her mother into retirement, shifting her focus from her own artistic talents to turning her daughter into her next protegee.

Much to her mother's dismay, Giselle was not the younger version of her mother. She was good, great even, but she was no sensation. Giselle made soloist in her fourth year at ABT, which was a feat all on its own, unless you compared it to her mother's two. Giselle lacked the raw, natural talent that her mother possessed. Instead of her mother's high arches, she had her father's averagely flat feet. Instead of her mother's uncanny ability to match the music, Giselle had spent hours counting eights in her head to get down a rhythm. Instead of looking effortless the first time she ran through a routine, Giselle spent hours in the studio after rehearsal, running through the choreography until it wasn't possible for her to get it wrong. Giselle had gotten to where she was because of her hard work, not her natural talent- something her mother would never let her forget. To Natalia Korsakova, Giselle would never measure up.

The Swan Lake auditions are Giselle's first real shot at landing a lead, especially with principal dancer Anna Elliot out with a back injury for the foreseeable future. Giselle wants this role more than anything. To prove to herself that she is capable of  following in her mother's footsteps. And to prove to her mother that she is just as capable a dancer as she. For once in her life, she wants to hear her mother say not that she'd lost her spot or forgot to point her toes, but that she was proud of Giselle. Four words- that's all Giselle really wants.

"And will start first position, demi, demi, grand, demi and port de bra. Repeat in 2nd, 4th and 5th and then balance in fifth position arms in fifth," Mistress Ivanova barks, before gesturing to the pianist to begin.

Giselle focuses on her movements as the music begins. She tightens her core, elongates her neck and reaches her fingertips to the edges of her silhouette. Her legs quiver slightly as she bends her knees into the first grand plié, her mind focusing on maintaining her turnout.

"Relax that face Giselle," Mistress Ivanova corrects, as she makes her way around the room. "I don't want to see that this is work."

Giselle takes another deep breath, this time releasing her lips from their concentrated place and focusing on her breath. She lets the downtown Manhattan studio disappear from the background. Gone is the distant honking of impatient taxi drivers maneuvering their way through the New York City traffic. Gone is the light shining in from the full-length windows looking out at the city skyline- well what you could see of the skyline behind the crumbly brick building neighboring the school. There was nothing but the dancer, the barre and the music flowing gently through her veins.

"Beautiful lines Teagan, thank you," Giselle hears Mistress Ivanova say from across the room and she fights the urge to roll her eyes. Giselle has known Teagan Davidson since she was fourteen years old, when Teagan had moved from California to New York to join the ABT school. Over the course of a decade of competing for roles, partners and teacher's praises, the two had developed quite a rivalry. To Giselle, there was almost no better feeling than snagging a role that she knew Teagan also had her eyes on.

Giselle uses Teagan's praise as motivation to work harder, feeling the burn in her inner thighs as she pushes further into her grand plié in second. The role of Odette/Odile was hers, Teagan would have to settle for understudy.

The class is in the middle of their balance, Giselle's focus locked in on a spot just at the edge of the window at the rear of the studio when a loud bang reverberates through the room. Dancers drop their balance and turn their heads, looking to see who has caused such a commotion with their entrance.

"Mr. Styles, you're late," Mistress Ivanova snaps.

He is taller than Giselle imagined, and even from this distance she can see the definition in his arms through the black tank top that clings to his body. His hair is slightly disheveled, curling at the top. His face plastered into some cheeky grin, dimples present on both cheeks, like he knows exactly what he's doing, interrupting class like this. Almost like he's enjoying the attention. He throws his black messenger bag to the side before grabbing his ballet shoes and scurrying over to an open spot at the barre near the front of the studio.

"My apologies," he replies in a thick British accent. His tone sounds anything but apologetic.

"Damn, he's even better-looking in person than he is in magazines," Caleb mutters under his breath, eliciting an eye roll from Giselle.

"Well, I suppose after that entrance," Mistress Ivanova sighs, stepping to the front of the class. "Now is as good of time as any to announce that Mr. Styles will be joining our company as a principal dancer."

Gasps fill the room, and Giselle turns her head to look at Viktor, whose face is stoic after Harry's entrance. A low chatter fills the studio, everyone trying to figure out exactly what is going on. Would he get the lead in Swan Lake? Would he be understudying Viktor?

"Silence!" Mistress Ivanova shouts. "This chatter can wait until after class is over!" She turns to face Harry, her lips turned into a stern frown. "If you'll find a place at the barre Mr. Styles, we will continue our class."

Giselle watches as he slides into a spot at the front of the room, shooting a grin at the young company member behind him. Giselle rolls her eyes, returning her focus to the mirror in front of her. Two minutes with the company and she was sure Harry Styles was exactly who she thought he would be.

Giselle tries to forget Harry Styles is in class with them. Instead she focuses on her breathing, her turnout, the rhythm that comes from the pianist in the corner of the room. She watches the early morning New York City sunrise reflect off of the mirrors, leaving little spots of sunlight over the gray Marley floor. Everyone else in the company could focus on Harry Styles all they want, but she is only focusing on one thing- and that is landing the role of her dreams tomorrow.

But Harry Styles wasn't the type of person whose presence could be forgotten so easily.

********

Harry Styles isn't scared of a little attention. In fact, he typically thrives on it. That's why he is a performer after all. To Harry, there is no better feeling than knowing all eyes are upon you, that you are the center of attention, the focus of the room. Maybe that is a prideful and egotistical thing to say, but it is true. Everyone wants to feel important, valued, admired- and anyone who says otherwise is a liar.

But the attention Harry has been getting since he walked into the American Ballet Theatre studio a little over twelve hours ago has not been the type of attention he necessarily sought out. He knew there would be rumors, leaving the only company he had ever been a part of during his dance career was sure to draw up the best of them, but something about this felt different. It was the whispers. The stares. The way some members of the room were staring at Harry as if he was a god and a few wouldn't dare look in his direction.

Harry doesn't know what's come over him- this wavering self-confidence. Maybe it's this new place. This new country. Or maybe it's the fact that in the words of his agent, if he "doesn't get his act together" he will never dance at this level again. And if he's not dancing on the world's biggest stages, well, Harry might as well not be dancing at all.

Harry grabs his phone from the side pocket of his black messenger bag, connecting it to the Bluetooth speaker he found in the corner of the studio and presses play on his hip hop playlist. He needs something to drown out his thoughts, and classical music just doesn't cut it. As the beat begins to fill the studio, Harry lets the music take over his body and begins to dance.

Giselle tries to focus on her music, but there's the noise of a pounding bass in the background interfering with concentration. She's always the only one at the studio this late at night- that's why she comes- to be alone and without distractions.

She tries to ignore it, focusing on the one and two of the music as she fouettés. One and two, three and four, five and... a boom from somewhere in the building breaks her concentration and she falls out of her turn, letting out a groan. This could not be happening to her the night before auditions, and if she found out that Teagan was here trying to interfere with her practice...

Giselle makes her way down the hall, guided by the incessant bass that sounds like it belongs in the backseat of a teenager's car and not one of the most prestigious ballet studios in the world. When she turns the corner to enter the studio, it's not Teagan she sees but Harry Styles.

But he's not dancing. He's laying on the floor, wearing nothing but a pair of black athletic shorts that show off the god-like definition of his thighs. His signature butterfly tattoo stands out on the middle of his chest, beads of sweat dripping towards the center of his stomach, the bass vibrating the mirrors around him. He doesn't notice her at first. How could he with the music so loud?

"Excuse me," Giselle says loudly in an effort to get his attention. His body doesn't even flinch.

"Excuse me!" she yells this time. 

Harry looks up. In the corner of the studio, towards the door stands a girl. Her almost black hair is pulled tightly back into a bun. Her thin arms are crossed like she's about to lecture him, and her lips are held in a tight line that looks anything but happy. The corners of Harry's mouth curve upwards in a grin, entertained by the fury that was seeming to come from her tiny body.

She taps her foot impatiently, like she's waiting for something. Harry realizes that she is- she's waiting for him to turn off his music.

He sighs, reaching over to his phone beside him and sliding one sweaty finger across the screen to bring the rhythm to a halt.

"Yes?" he asks expectantly, not bothering to move his body from his reclining position.

"Other people in this studio are trying to practice, you know. It's kinda hard to do that with this," she gestures into the air, as if trying to find an appropriate adjective to describe the torture that had been gracing her ears over the past half hour.

"Not a fan of my music?" Harry smirked.

"I'm not a fan of someone disrupting my rehearsal." Giselle spit back.

"Rehearsal? It's bloody 11pm."

"I know what time it is, and like I said, your music is interfering with my ability to practice." Giselle stares Harry right in the eyes. He doesn't intimidate her, and she's not going to back down until he agrees to turn down his music.

"Wasn't aware you were the owner of this studio," Harry taunts.

"I could say the same about you." Giselle moves her hands to her hips. Just agree to turn off the damn music, she thinks to herself, even though she knows at this point, it's not worth the time it will take to warm back up to continue practicing.

Harry sits up, grabbing a blue towel from inside his bag and wiping the sweat that remains off his forehead. "Fine, music's off. Continue your rehearsal. I'm too jet lagged for this shit," he stands, wrapping the towel around his neck.

"Thanks," Giselle says under her breath, before making her way back to her studio, where she knew she would be gathering her own belongings.

Harry groans, grabbing his bag from the floor and sliding it over his shoulder. You could travel halfway across the world and still run into the same entitled ballet brats who thought they ran the place. It's those type of people, company members and otherwise, that were precisely the reason he had left the Royal. Well, not that he had necessarily had a say in that scenario, but they had been the cause of all of his problems.

You just have to dance, Harry, he tries to tell himself. But Harry knows that as much as he tries, there's a lot more too it than that.

**********

“Gi!" Caleb exclaims, bounding down the hallway towards her without concern for anyone in his way. "Cast list is up."

Giselle gulps. She isn't sure that she is ready for this. The look of disappointment on her mother's face if she doesn't land the part. The list of corrections that her mother has come up with from watching Giselle's audition. "Now you see there, you've lost your center. You're never going to make that triple if you don't hold your center Giselle." The reminder that "you only have so many opportunities to prove your worth, before they move onto the younger, better version of you." It didn't matter to her mother if Giselle was the youngest soloist at ABT by five years. It didn't matter if nearly every other soloist had previously understudied for the role. Everything but a lead was a disappointment to Natalia Korsakova.

"C'mon," Caleb exclaims, and before Giselle has a moment to collect herself she's being pulled down the hallway by her arm.

And there it is. The thin, white piece of paper that holds the fate of her next ten weeks in its hands. When she looks at it at first, she thinks she must be dreaming. Because her name has never been on that spot on the list before. Not since she officially joined the company five years ago.

Odette/Odile- Giselle Mason

Sigfried - Harry Styles

She feels frozen. Like she's in a dream and she's paralyzed. It's what she's always wanted-this role and yet, suddenly it feels like a whole lot of pressure.

"You did it Gi," Caleb exclaims, lifting her up and spinning her around before Giselle even has a moment to look any further down the list. Giselle laughs, giddy with excitement. "New York will have never seen a more beautiful Odette."

Giselle rolls her eyes at his comment. Caleb, her friend since joining the American Ballet School at the age of six and partner for many years had always been her biggest cheerleader. In a way, he made up for what she didn't have in her mother.

"And you Caleb?" Giselle asks, realizing in her excitement that she had forgotten that her best friend also had a role in the this ballet.

"You're looking at the newest Benno," Caleb says with a grin. Giselle often wondered what it would be like to be like Caleb. To be happy with any role. To not care about his place in the company. To simply want to dance. Caleb had always been like that- relaxed, calm- the antithesis to Giselle who was always high strung and anxious. Perhaps that's why they'd always been such good friends, because they balanced each other perfectly. Giselle pushed Caleb when he needed some extra motivation and Caleb- albeit not always successful- tried his best to keep Giselle out of her own head.

Giselle watches as Teagan makes her way over to the board, her long black hair swinging from the ponytail at the crown of her head. She grins in slight satisfaction as she sees Teagan's face turn into a frown. Giselle turns and gives Caleb her best, "what did she get?" eyes. He exaggeratedly mouths, "UNDERSTUDY".

As if sensing that she is the topic of conversation, Teagan looks over at the two. "Congrats Giselle," she says, her face moving in a way that makes it seem like the words taste disgusting leaving her mouth.

"You as well," Giselle responds, to which Teagan only scoffs and storms off.

"You know she's going to make your life living hell as your understudy don't you?" Caleb said with a laugh.

"Ugh, I know," Giselle groaned.

"It will be worth it though. You are going to be dancing the role you've always dreamed of." Giselle smiled. "Plus," Caleb begins, leaning down so his mouth is next to Giselle's ear. "You get to dance with the greatest male dancer of our generation. Think of all the hours you're gonna get to spend looking at that GORGEOUS body."

Giselle groans. Her perfect moment temporarily ruined by the realization that she would have to dance with Harry Styles. Sure, he may be talented, a great dancer, and likely a great partner. But his entrance yesterday and their encounter last night told her everything she needed to know about Harry Styles. And she was sure that working with him would be anything but easy.

"That GORGEOUS body," Giselle imitates Caleb with an exaggeration of the word, "Doesn't make up for the fact that the guy's an asshole."

"Okay, okay, point taken. Now can we go get some lunch?"

Giselle nods, but she already knows she's not hungry. Instead, all she can think about is how she's going to get through the next ten weeks of rehearsals with a man she already loathes.

**********

Giselle slides into the rehearsal studio with extra joy in her step later that afternoon. She's so on Cloud 9 that she doesn't even realize Harry standing at the barre doing pliés as she hums the opening notes of Swan Lake aloud.

"Sorry didn't know anyone else was in here already," she apologizes quickly, standing and stretching out her feet.

Harry looks at her, his face hard and eyes sharp. If he recognized her as the girl who interrupted his jam session last night his face didn't show it. "And who are you?" Harry asks, his voice laced with condescendence.

"Odette," Giselle smiles, the words feeling foreign leaving her mouth.

"Obviously," Harry scoffs, and Giselle feels her confidence waver. "Who are you?"

"Giselle Mason, soloist."

"Doesn't ring a bell," the corners of Harry's mouth turn up at his comment, like he gets satisfaction out of reminding others that they aren't the household name that he is.

Giselle wants to say something back. Something sharp and witty to show him that just because he was one of the greatest dancers in the world and she was still trying to make her way into the spotlight didn't mean that he could treat her like a nobody. She was going to be his partner after all- whether he liked it or not. But then Gregory Alexander, ABT's Artistic Director, enters the room, clapping his hands and tells them they are about to begin on the Act II Pas de Deux and Giselle doesn't have a chance to say otherwise.

"As new partners you will need to put in the time to understand each other. Build trust. Anticipate the other's movement. Portray to the audience that you are a swan and a prince in love." Gregory moves his arms in the air theatrically, as if he isn't wearing a designer suit.

"Now I understand that the ten weeks we have to prepare before our season debut isn't an ideal amount of time to form a relationship with a new partner. But in this case, it simply must do." Gregory's face turned serious, the wrinkles on his forehead more defined as he furrows his eyebrows. "I expect that the two of you will put in the time outside of your scheduled rehearsals to work on this chemistry. Anna and Viktor will also be assisting with rehearsals and my hope is that they will also be able to assist the two of you with this transition."

"Gregory," Harry interrupts, then as if realizing he'd made a mistake, he corrects himself. "Sir."

Gregory nods.

"I'm not sure what the concern is. I've danced with hundreds of partners in my career, I'm not sure how the other principal's would have much more experience than me?" Giselle thinks Harry is meaning this as a question but it comes out more like a statement.

Giselle watches as Gregory's eyes narrow again. He looked irritated, and why wouldn't he be? Harry had been here all but forty-eight hours and was already questioning the artistic director's decisions. 

"That may be the case, Mr. Styles," Gregory paused. "But when the two of you step onto Metropolitan Opera House stage in ten weeks, I expect the audience to believe that you two have been dancing together for years. Have I made myself clear?"

Harry nods, this time remaining quiet.

"Now then, I'd like us to start with the Act II Pas de Deux. The very beginning- with your entrance Harry."

It's an hour into rehearsals when Giselle hears the echo of heels clicking down the wooden hallways. She doesn't even have to look up when the steps stop as they reach the studio floor. She could recognize that walk anywhere.

"Aahh, Natalia!" Gregory exclaims. "So glad you could stop by," Gregory reaches over to embrace Giselle's mother, his grey hair brushing the sides of her face as he kisses each cheek.

"Mr. Styles, I'd like to introduce you to Natalia Korsakova, former ABT principal and member of our board."

Natalia Korsakova looks as put together as always. Her dark brown hair pulled tightly into a neat French twist. Her tight black dress and coordinating pumps show off every bit of the dancer's body that she still maintained. Giselle watches as her mother's mouth curves to form a polite smile.

"A ballet legend. It's an honor to meet you Madame," Harry says offering his hand.

"The pleasure is all mine. I'm so glad you are joining us here at ABT. And what a joy it will be to watch you next to my daughter," Natalia gestures towards Giselle, with a polite smile plastered on her face that was generally reserved for generous donors and patrons of the ballet. It is all a show. That's all Giselle's mother ever did was put on a production. She was a performer after all, how could anyone expect her life to be anything but a crowd-pleasing performance?

"Your daughter?" Harry turns to look at Giselle, raising an eyebrow. His eyes narrow, as if he's caught Giselle in a lie. As if she'd snuck her way into this position and was just hoping that someone wouldn't notice she wasn't the real deal. "Why that makes this even more special."

Giselle fights every urge to roll her eyes from across the room. It is clear that Harry Styles is every bit as much of a performer as her mother. Just minutes before he was looking at her as if he had been paired with an amateur and suddenly working with her is 'something special'?

"I'm going to watch rehearsal for a bit," Natalia announces, making her way over to a stool next to the pianist. "Carry on." The pit in the bottom of Giselle's stomach grows as her mother takes a seat next to Gregory in front of the mirror.

"Odette makes sense to me now," Harry whispers into Giselle's ear, as he slides behind her to resume practice. It takes everything in her to keep her face stoic as Harry's hands settle once again on her waist.

Rehearsal goes badly. Giselle can't seem to get her leg into the attitude position that Gregory wants, she losing her balance on her penchés, and Harry almost drops her on several promenades. Giselle says almost, because someone as experienced as Harry Styles would never let his partner hit the ground, but she should have, because she surely wasn't holding her weight quite right. And then there's the fact that Gregory pronounced that Giselle "looks at Harry as if he is the villain of the story instead of the prince she's fallen in love with". 

Giselle wants to say that's because he is the villain. The villain of her story anyways, the person that is somehow going to turn her dream role into somewhat of a nightmare. Why couldn't she be dancing with Viktor? He was so patient and kind and he would never look at his partner as if she deserved to be in the audience instead of on stage with him.

After yet another failed run through of the first half of the pas de deux, Gregory announces that they are done for the day, but that he expects to see them in the studio bright and early tomorrow morning to work on their timing. Giselle's never been so thankful for a rehearsal to be over, and as she sits down to remove her pointe shoes, running her hands over her swollen feet, she watches Harry leave the studio without saying a word.

"I hope you realize how big of an opportunity this is Giselle. It's not one you should take lightly," her mother's voice startles her, as Giselle had almost forgotten she was there. Almost.

Natalia stands above Giselle, one hand on her hips and the other on her forehead, as if watching today's rehearsal had been exhausting for her. It probably was exhausting for her, keeping tally of all the things that Giselle had done wrong for the past two hours. Natalia's voice is shrill as she speaks again. "There are thousands of ballerinas around the world that could only dream of getting to dance with Harry Styles. And here you are dancing with him in his first show with ABT. That's an enormous responsibility, darling. This performance with him will set the stage for his entire career with our company. One that the board is hoping will last until his retirement."

Giselle nods. That's all she can do when her mother begins one of her lectures- nod. She thought maybe this would be the time that her mother told her congratulations. The time that her mother did what she'd watched countless other mother's do during her time as a dancer, wrap their arms around their daughter and express their pride to them. But instead, today is like any other day, and even with a lead role in an ABT production, Giselle still hasn't done enough to make her mother proud.

Giselle shoves her shoes into her bag, slinging it over her shoulder as she stands.

"And Giselle?" her mother adds, as she makes her way towards the door.

"Yes mom?" 

"Might want to hit a few more cardio classes this week too, my dear. Got to make sure you are going to be an easy dancer to partner with." 

And with that comment Natalia Korsakova clicks away, leaving Giselle standing in the middle of studio wondering if her biggest dream has suddenly become her biggest nightmare.

[runningdownthatroad]

I just have to get this off my chest after seeing some very disturbing posts about 9/11 floating around on my dash as well as some truly crude commentary. A lot probably won't agree with my sentiments but I feel like this needs to be said.

I've seen a lot of things on Tumblr in the past that maybe I consider to be in poor taste or don't agree with but I usually just scroll past, sometimes block for curating sake, but today is the first time I truly was shell-shocked. To see the memes and blasé jokes people are making about this day are just absolutely horrific and appalling.

I get that a lot of people on this site now may not remember what happened that day and only learned second hand through school or media or other people telling them. I get that a lot occurred after this that wasn't right which we definitely should be learning from. I also get that there is a lot of anti-American and anti-white sentiments going around currently, especially on this site.

But here's the thing:

Not only Americans died that day. Not only white people died that day. That's the thing about terrorists and what these hijackers did: they don't care about your skin color, your culture, your religious preference, your sexual orientation, your gender orientation, your age, your economic status, your personality, whether you support them or not, your political persuasion, your job, or any of it. Everyone is fair game to them. For crying out loud, look at what the Afghani people are currently going through and how the Taliban are treating their own country's people, women especially. If you think this is bad (which it truly is), have you seen how things went under their rule before 9/11 even happened? Do you know their terrifyingly violent and brutal history? Women had acid thrown in their faces if they didn't wear a full hijab. People were mutilated or executed if they didn't fall in line with the law of the Taliban. And this doesn't even begin to go into Al-Qaeda or Isis. But I'm not here to talk about that or delve into that topic too much.

My point in mentioning all of this is that white Americans weren't the only ones that were killed that day. People of all faiths, of all colors, of different countries, died that day, too. And the unity that is consistently discussed every 9/11 anniversary is in regards to us being aware of that fact, us mourning all of their losses together, and the collective desire to come together and help once the planes hit and after the towers collapsed.

So when people say "why am I supposed to cry over white Americans getting killed that day" think about that. Not only white Americans died that day. And regardless of their color, their nationality, their culture, their religion, etc. anyone dying is always sad. Whether it be a jetliner being used as a weapon that crashed into their floor or someone dying of cancer or someone being killed in a mudslide or someone dying in a car accident -- it is always sad. And empathy should always be shown in response, even if it doesn't impact you personally. Let's not forget these people have loved ones that got left behind, that are still here.

So when people say "if something knocks into a cow and knocks it over, I'm not expected to care, but if something knocks into a building and knocks it over, suddenly I'm supposed to care?" think about that. People aren't grieving two large pieces of steel architecture. People aren't saying "always remember those two towers". The WTC Towers were a symbol (yes, for American wealth, I get it) but became so much more of a multi-faceted powerful symbol after 9/11. The towers represent a way of life before 9/11 happened, but more importantly they represent the people lost that day, who were in the towers when they collapsed. For all of the first responders who were stuck on those floors still trying to help evacuate people to safety when the buildings finally gave. The two footprints and two blue lights aren't a symbol of American wealth or a naivete and simpler way of life pre-9/11 - they are a symbol of memorialization for that day. The Freedom Tower was erected to show that despite the loss of that day, we stood united (even if there seems to be more and more division these days). It's a message to the world that yes, destruction and death happened that day in NYC, but so did rebuilding and life carrying on. It's a symbol of strength, resilience, and unity - something that was everywhere you looked days after this event occurred. The two towers (aka NYC) may have gotten knocked down but the city got back up. They weren't kept down - that's the point of the Freedom Tower.

When people say "I don't understand, what is it that I shouldn't be forgetting since I can't remember it anyway" here is what we all should be remembering despite our age or our connection (or lack thereof) with this event:

2,997 innocent civilians died that day. Among them were 343 firefighters, 37 police officers, 23 Port Authority police officers, 8 EMS workers, and 4 other first responders. Also among them were 246 people on the four planes that crashed.

The passengers of United Flight 93 made a choice to fight back against the hijackers and saved lives that day by sacrificing their own.

Many children lost parents. Many parents lost children. Many brothers lost sisters, and many sisters lost brothers. Many spouses lost their significant others. Many lost friends, family, and loved ones.

For those who want a better connection to this day who didn't experience it and/or don't remember it, and for those others who are seriously lacking in empathy: yes, it was a highly publicized event due to the hundreds of cameras (including media outlets) watching that day, but if the horrific images aren't enough to garner some of your empathy, then there are plenty of other resources at your disposal. Documentaries like 9/11 by James Hanlon and the Naudet brothers, 102 Minutes That Changed America (which shows you not only all of the first-hand eyewitness accounts that day but also lets you hear 911 calls, radio transmissions between firefighters, and people's reactions to the event and each other who were there), 9/11 Firefighters (on Discovery Plus) and even more recently, 9/11: The Turning Point (on Netflix) which provides a 360 degree view of the events that led up to 9/11, 9/11 itself, and what came after, displaying all different viewpoints. You can read the 9/11 Commission Report or there are several books and memoirs out there like Wake-Up Call by Kristen Breitweiser, or even historical accounts in books, newspaper articles, and online. But most importantly, listen to people's stories. The ones who were there, the ones who saw it happen, the ones who ran in to help, the ones who lost loved ones. That is the most important part and the most powerful. On Hulu, ABC News ran segments of 9/11 Twenty Years Later, "Women Of Resilience" being especially powerful. It's hard not to feel a human connection to these stories or any kind of empathy.

For those who are making these jokes and memes, if you like shows like 9-1-1 and Chicago Fire, etc, imagine those first responder characters rushing into those buildings to save lives and losing theirs in the process. If you don't remember 9/11 or feel any connection or empathy, imagine hundreds of Bucks or Eddies or Bobbys or Hens or Chimneys dying that day as they worked to save so many. Sorry to be so blunt because I love those characters too, but do you get a little bit of the connection now? Do you feel any empathy? I'm not trying to equate real life heroes and sheroes with fictional characters of course, but if it helps you to understand a little better in some way, well...I'm throwing it out there.

I myself lived in the Tri-State area at the time of the attacks. I remember seeing the second plane seconds before it crashed into the second building. I remember the devastation I felt watching the first tower collapse knowing that a loved one was most likely inside and how hard I cried thinking he was dead. (thankfully, he had been late to work that day and he got out of the area before the towers came down) I remember the relief and gratefulness we all felt hearing from him to assure us that he was alive when he finally was able to get to a phone, stating he was covered in dust and ash from the buildings. I remember the panic and fear we all felt, thinking the world was ending and we were all going to die, that this was it, this was World War III, after it was confirmed that the Pentagon had also been hit and there was also a downed plane in Pennsylvania. I remember the grief another loved one suffered because she lost her entire floor (she had been out sick that day) and every single one of her co-workers. I remember the race to pick up children from school and get them home as soon as possible. I remember the rage that coursed through us seeing the footage of some people in certain countries celebrating the attacks in the streets, enjoying the deaths of so many Americans, a couple of these countries who lost citizens themselves in these attacks. I remember the camping out in front of the televisions night after night for a week straight afterwards, watching the news 24/7, worrying that there might be more attacks. I remember the feeling of sheer terror anytime a plane was heard overhead or seen appearing low enough in the sky that you could practically make out which airline it was for months afterwards. I remember seeing the lights the first time they were lit from our home. I remember feeling pure fear not only for what happened that day but also what came afterwards (not yet understanding that these weren't practitioners of Islam that did this but radical extremists who had literally hijacked the religion). I remember seeing the devastation at Ground Zero through a tear in the fabric over a fence as we walked through the city months afterwards. I remember not wanting to fly for years. I remember the anger I felt that our government had failed us due to political bs between agencies and countless others (which we found out especially when the 9/11 Commission Report came out) and that because of this horrific and absurd failure, thousands of innocent people had died. I remember seeing the crushed ladder truck, and the toy of the little girl who was on one of the planes at the 9/11 Memorial Museum and all of the pictures in that room that just floored me. (I also remember being pissed off that many were treating it as a selfie op where they were allowed to take pictures, completely missing the point of the museum's existence) But most of all, I remember feeling that life would never be the same for any of us ever again, and that the feeling of safety we had naively enjoyed on September 10, 2001 would never return.

But I also remember the compassion and unity we saw rising in the country after those attacks. I remember the gratitude for all of our first responders, those we lost that day and those who were still with us, actively working to recover those lost and to clear Ground Zero. I remember the feeling of collectiveness, that we all shared grief and showed support to one another in those days afterwards. I remember the fallen heroes and sheroes who ran into those buildings, who were off duty but raced from wherever they were that day to come and help. I remember The Man In the Red Bandana aka Welles Crowther (and many like him who worked to save others) who has become another important symbol of that day. I remember hearing all of the stories of people helping one another before and after the towers collapsed. I remember the good that this day represents. That while we may have seen some of the worst of humanity that day in the form of violence, death, weaponized airplanes, and devastation, we also saw the very best of humanity in the form of our first responders and people helping one another.

Look, did Islamophobia happen? Yes. Was it right? No, absolutely not. As I stated above, I myself feared the idea of the religion until I was educated by a friend of mine about the difference between the religion and extremism. This form of hijacking ideology can be seen in examples like the Westboro Baptist Church or even Hitler. Terrorists do not represent the true spirit of Islam no matter what the former tries to force people to believe. Just as the WBC is not the true spirit of Christianity, and so on and so forth. But even during the time I had feared the religion before gaining understanding and clarity, I never confronted or mistreated any practicing Muslim or Arab-American. Ever. I never posted hate or spewed vitriol against them. Just like with the current pandemic, I still cannot believe there are people out there attack Asian-Americans as if this whole thing is their fault. That's still mind boggling to me and it is absolutely 100% WRONG. It should not be happening. Same with Islamophobia. And it breaks my heart to read that many Arab-Americans and practicing Muslims still worry when this anniversary comes around that they may be attacked. It might not mean much, but I just want to say I am truly sorry for that and you have my full support. Always.

Did we go to war and was it just? Yes we did go to war. Was it just? Afghanistan? I need more information in order to have a fully-formed opinion but there are plenty who say yes and plenty who say no. Plenty who say we made things better over there (before we exited and the Taliban advanced) and plenty who say we didn't and only made it worse. I truly cannot say which assertion is correct and I think it would be narrow-minded and completely moronic (and possibly arrogant and presumptuous?) of me to speak on a subject I know so little about, one way or the other. Iraq? No, I don't think it was just and I honestly wish we could go back and do things differently.

But coming back to 9/11 and what this day means for so many, the people who died, the people who rushed headfirst into danger, the people who lost their loved ones. We saw incredible bravery, selflessness, and compassion for your fellow human that day despite what happened. We saw the strength within ourselves despite the fear and anger. We saw resilience. That is what the anniversary is meant to be a reminder of. The sacrifices, the loss, the courage, and the strength. Black, White, Gay, Straight, Christian, Muslim, Man, Woman, Young, Old -- it didn't matter. We all came together.

So regardless of whether it's the cool thing to do right now on this site (or elsewhere) to hate on America or 9/11 or white Americans or the anniversary itself on the very anniversary of these attacks, I ask that you please consider when posting these hurtful (and frankly harmful) words of hatred and vitriol such as referenced above that there are people out there who lost their loved ones on 9/11, that yes some of them may be on this very site and going through the 9/11 tag, and that some of them may have even lost a loved one in either war and are again on this site reading your words. Regardless of what you think or feel, please consider them and tag appropriately if you're going to post. Please consider that some of these people are currently losing their loved ones due to 9/11-related illnesses because of the cleanup at Ground Zero. Please consider that there are children who lost a parent or loved one, or who were orphaned that day (yes, they exist, we had some in our school district) who are also on this site reading your words. Basically, please just consider and be considerate. Please stop spreading hatred on a day that happened due to hatred; please stop perpetuating that cycle.

Like Martin Luther King Jr. said, "Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that."

TLDR: Love and light, my friends. Love and light. ✌️❤️

[multiverseforger]

Edit

In November 2013, Marvel Comics announced that Kamala Khan, a teenage American Muslim from Jersey City, New Jersey, would take over the comic book series Ms. Marvel beginning in February 2014. The series, written by G. Willow Wilson and drawn by Adrian Alphona, marked the first time a Muslim character headlined a book at Marvel Comics.[2] However, Noelene Clark of the Los Angeles Times noted that Khan is not the first Muslim character in comic books, which include Simon Baz, Dust and M.[3] The conception of Kamala Khan came about during a conversation between Marvel editors Sana Amanat and Stephen Wacker. Amanat said, "I was telling him [Wacker] some crazy anecdote about my childhood, growing up as a Muslim American. He found it hilarious." The pair then told Wilson about the concept and Wilson became eager to jump aboard the project.[4] Amanat said that the series came from a "desire to explore the Muslim-American diaspora from an authentic perspective."[5]

Artist Jamie McKelvie based Khan's design on his redesign of Carol Danvers as Captain Marvel and on Dave Cockrum's design of the original Ms. Marvel.[6] Amanat requested that the design "reflected the Captain Marvel legacy, and also her story and her background."[7] Amanat stated that Khan's costume was influenced by the shalwar kameez. They wanted the costume to represent her cultural identity, but did not want her to wear a hijab,[8] because the majority of teenage Pakistani-American girls do not wear one.[9] Amanat also stated that they wanted the character to look "less like a sex siren" to appeal to a more vocal female readership.[8]

Marvel knew that they wanted a young Muslim girl, but stated that she could be from any place of origin and have any background. Wilson initially considered making her an Arab girl from Dearborn, Michigan but ultimately chose to create a Desi girl from Jersey City.[10] Jersey City, which sits across the Hudson River from Manhattan, has been referred to as New York City's "Sixth borough".[11][12][13] It therefore forms an important part of Khan's identity and the narrative journey of her character since most of Marvel Comics' stories are set in Manhattan. Wilson explains, "A huge aspect of Ms. Marvel is being a 'second string hero' in the 'second string city' and having to struggle out of the pathos and emotion that can give a person."[14]

The series not only explores Khan's conflicts with supervillains but also explores conflicts with Khan's home and religious duties. Wilson, a convert to Islam, said "This is not evangelism. It was really important for me to portray Kamala as someone who is struggling with her faith." Wilson continued, "Her brother is extremely conservative, her mom is paranoid that she's going to touch a boy and get pregnant, and her father wants her to concentrate on her studies and become a doctor."[4] Amanat added,

As much as Islam is a part of Kamala's identity, this book isn't preaching about religion or the Islamic faith in particular. It's about what happens when you struggle with the labels imposed on you, and how that forms your sense of self. It's a struggle we've all faced in one form or another, and isn't just particular to Kamala because she's Muslim. Her religion is just one aspect of the many ways she defines herself.[2]



First appearance of Kamala Khan from Captain Marvel #14 (August 2013) by Kelly Sue DeConnick and Scott Hepburn

In the series, Khan takes the name Ms. Marvel from Carol Danvers, who now goes by the alias Captain Marvel. Captain Marvel writer Kelly Sue DeConnick revealed that Khan actually made a brief appearance in Captain Marvel #14 (August 2013) saying, "Kamala is in the background of a scene in Captain Marvel 14 ... She is very deliberately placed in a position where she sees Carol protecting civilians from Yon-Rogg."[15] According to Wilson, Khan idolizes Carol so when Khan acquires superhuman abilities, she emulates Danvers.[14] "Captain Marvel represents an ideal that Kamala pines for. She's strong, beautiful and doesn't have any of the baggage of being Pakistani and 'different,'"[4] Wilson explained. "Khan is a big comic book fan and after she discovers her superhuman power – being a polymorph and able to lengthen her arms and legs and change her shape – she takes on the name of Ms. Marvel," Amanat elaborated.[16] Khan is one of several characters who discover that they have Inhuman heritage following the "Inhumanity" storyline, in which the Terrigen Mists are released throughout the world and activate dormant Inhuman cells.[17]

In the series' first story arc, Khan faces off against Mr. Edison / the Inventor, an amalgam of man and bird. Wilson created the Inventor to be Khan's first arch rival in order to mirror Khan's own complexity. Wilson characterizes the Inventor, and the overall visual look of the opening story arc as "kooky and almost Miyazaki-esque at times", owing to the art style of illustrator Adrian Alphona, which balances the drama of the threats which Khan faces with the humor of Alphona's "tongue in cheek sight gags." During the storyline, Khan also teams-up with the X-Man Wolverine against the Inventor. Because Wolverine is dealing with the loss of his healing factor during this time, Khan is placed in the position of having to shoulder much of the responsibilities, as Wilson felt this was a role reversal that would subvert reader expectations that Wolverine would take the lead in such a team-up.[18]

At the 2014 San Diego Comic-Con International, writer Dan Slott announced that Khan would team-up with Spider-Man beginning in The Amazing Spider-Man #7 (October 2014) during the "Spider-Verse" storyline. Slott characterized Khan "the closest character to classic Peter Parker,"[19] explaining, "She's a teenage superhero, juggling her life, making mistakes, trying to do everything right."[20]

Beginning in June 2015, Ms. Marvel tied into the "Secret Wars" crossover event with the "Last Days" storyline, which details Khan's account of the end of the Marvel Universe. Wilson explained, "In the 'Last Days' story arc, Kamala has to grapple with the end of everything she knows, and discover what it means to be a hero when your whole world is on the line."[21] In the storyline, Khan rushes to deal with the threat in Manhattan. However, Wilson revealed, "She will face a very personal enemy as the chaos in Manhattan spills over into Jersey City, and she will be forced to make some very difficult choices. There will also be a very special guest appearance by a superhero Kamala—and the fans—have been waiting to meet for a long time."[22]

In March 2015, Marvel announced that Khan will join the Avengers in All-New All-Different Avengers FCBD (May 2015) by writer Mark Waid and artists Adam Kubert and Mahmud Asrar, which takes place in the aftermath of "Secret Wars".[23] A second volume of Ms. Marvel starring Khan by Wilson, Alphona and Takeshi Miyazawa is also debuted following "Secret Wars" as part of Marvel's All-New, All-Different Marvel initiative.[24] Amanat said,

By the time this new launch comes around, it will have been almost two years since the premiere of Ms. Marvel—and boy, has Kamala Khan been through a lot since then. She's been slowly coming into her own, dealing with the challenges of navigating adulthood and being a super hero. But her training is over now and it's time for the big leagues; the question is can she handle it? ... As much as Kamala has a right to be there—it's still a bit of a culture shock. Dreaming of being an Avenger and then suddenly being one is a lot to take on for someone of her age. So, she'll be a little awestruck, a little overly ambitious.[25]

In March 2016, Marvel announced that Ms. Marvel would tie into the "Civil War II" storyline by releasing a promotional image illustrating a rift between Khan and Danvers.[26] "While "Civil War II" may have initiated this rift, we've known for some time that Kamala would eventually need to separate herself from her idols. Her journey centers around self-discovery and identity, and a part of that exploration includes separating yourself from those you put on pedestals. The rift between Carol and Kamala doesn't really have to do with right and wrong. It has to do with growing up and realizing that you perceive the world differently from even the ones you love," Amanat elaborated.[27]

In July, Marvel announced that Khan will join the Champions, a team of teenage superheroes who split off from the Avengers following the conclusion of "Civil War II". The team, featured in a series by writer Mark Waid and artist Humberto Ramos, consists of Khan, Spider-Man (Miles Morales), Nova (Sam Alexander), Hulk (Amadeus Cho), Viv Vision, and a teenage version of Cyclops. Waid said, "The first three are the kids who quit the Avengers proper. That was an easy get. Those three, in and of themselves, form a nice little subteam. Their dynamic is great. They all show up in each other's books, and even though they have their arguments and stress points, clearly they're good together."[28]

In August, Khan made an appearance in Moon Girl and Devil Dinosaur #10 by writers Amy Reeder and Brandon Montclare. In the issue, Khan acts as a mentor to Moon Girl (Lunella Lafayette) who is also a young Inhuman that suddenly came into her powers. Amanat stated that Khan sees much of herself in Lafayette and by teaching her, Khan learns much about herself.[27]

In November, Marvel announced that Khan will join a new incarnation of the Secret Warriors in a series by writer Matthew Rosenberg and artist Javier Garron that debuted in May 2017. The team, formed in the wake of the "Inhumans vs X-Men" storyline, also includes Quake, Karnak, Moon Girl, and Devil Dinosaur. Rosenberg stated that there is some conflict and friction amongst the team members explaining, "Ms. Marvel and Quake are really fighting for the soul of the team in a lot of ways, while Moon Girl will continue to really do her own thing. They will all be tested and challenged, they are superheroes after all, but they are going to do things their way."[29]

In March 2017, Marvel announced that Khan would team-up with Danvers in a one-shot issue of the limited anthology series, Generations by Wilson and Paolo Villanelle. Wilson stated that the issue would explore Danvers' and Khan's mentor–student relationship, but "at its heart, [it] is about growing up, and a big part of growing up is discovering that your idols have feet of clay – and forgiving them for their flaws as you gain an adult understanding of your own."[30]

In December, Ms. Marvel began the "Teenage Wasteland" story arc, as part of the Marvel Legacy relaunch. Wilson said, "Since the events of 'Civil War II', there's been friction between Kamala and her mentor, Captain Marvel. In this arc, we're exploring how complicated legacies can be when they're passed from generation to generation ... She's questioning a lot about herself and her mission. Her friends end up stepping into some very important—and unexpected—roles. So in a sense, the arc is really about a bunch of chronically under-estimated teenagers who pull together to fight evil."[31]

Ms. Marvel #31, the 50th issue of Ms. Marvel featuring Khan was released in June 2018. To mark the occasion, Marvel brought in additional collaborators for the issue including writers: G. Willow Wilson, Saladin Ahmed, Rainbow Rowell, and Hasan Minhaj; and artists: Nico Leon, Bob Quinn, Gustavo Duarte, and Elmo Bondoc.[32]

Beginning in March 2019, Khan headlined a new series titled, The Magnificent Ms. Marvel, written by Ahmed and illustrated by Minkyu Jung. Wilson stated that she had been planning her departure from the series for over a year, stating that she originally anticipated that the series would only last for ten issues and was excited by the fact that she had written 60 issues. Ahmed said the new series will have much wider scope, "while still maintaining that intimate tone that people have loved about it."[33]

In July 2020, Marvel announced that Khan would star in an original graphic novel, published in conjunction with Scholastic and aimed at younger readers. The book will be written by author Nadia Shammas. An illustrator has not yet been named.[34

[dachi-chan25]

Haven't done this in a while but I had the time so why not?

1.- Pizza Girl by Kyoung Jean Frazier

🌟🌟🌟🌟

I really did like it, reminded me a lot of "Convinience store woman". Like clearly our protagonist needed thrapy ASAP to help her deal with her dad's death, her pregnancy, her attraction to women and hell just for existing as an Asian woman in the USA, but I liked how messy and obsesive she was and how the author allowed her to be fucked up and take bad decisions, I love to see female characters simply exist, it's also a pretty short read so I definitely recommend it.

2.-The Authentics by Abdi Nazemian

🌟🌟🌟🌟

Daría is a persian teen who is really involved in her cultural background and feels that the most important thing one can be is authentic, so that's the name she and her friends take for their clique. But everything comes crashing down on her when she discovers she is adopted, and soon follows an identity crisis. I loved it so much, it felt pretty realistic, like Daría could be self absorbed and unlikeable at times, but who wasn't as a teen? And we get such beautiful heartwarming moments between Daría and her family and friends. Totally recommend it.

3.- The Mall by Megan McCafferty

🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

Cassie has her life completely mapped out but nothing goes quite as planned, first she gets mononucleosis and after she gets better gets dumped and fired almost simultaneously. Determined not to let it get the best of her, Cassie gets a brand new job, reconnects with an old friend and even finds a hidden treasure. This one is so much fun, all the 90s references and the growth Cassie goes through is amazing, honeslty i would love to see this as a Netflix movie.

4.- Luster by Raven Leilani

🌟🌟🌟🌟

This book was hard, Edie is a very raw character, at first she seems flippant even when describing disturbing facts about her past or details about her relationship with a much older man she seems to be talking about something that happened to someone else all this to cope dealing with her solitude, her trauma, her self hate. And gosh it was so intresting to see her interact with Rebecca and Akila, especially Akila as Edie finds kinship in this young girl not only cuz they are both black but because they are both lost and afraid.

5.- Lakewood by Megan Giddings

🌟🌟🌟

Lena decides to participate on a financially compensated medical experiment so her mom can get proper medical care and to lessen their debts after her Grandmother's death.

So I had many mixed feelings about this, on one hand I liked that we are adressing how sistematical racism has permited experiments on black people with no consequences at all and how it has been happening for decades, but there were certain parts of the book that I couldn't enjoy as much because they were very trippy like I get we are on Lena's mind as things are becoming muddled up because of the medications and all those mind games and the words they have her memorize and repeat but all of it took me a bit away from the story. Still I do recommend it just be aware there is quite a bit of body horror in this so if you are sqeamish better skip it.

6.-The Voting Booth - Brandy Colbert

🌟🌟🌟🌟

Marva and Duke meet on election day as she helps him find the precint he is registered on.

This is very enjoyable, the story is very straightforward, and it insists on our right and responsability to vote even if we feel our vote alone can't possibly change all the injustice we see in the world. And also the romance was cute and developed slowly as Marva and Duke are just knowing each other. Really cute and quick read.

7.- Such a fun age - Kiley Reid

🌟🌟🌟🌟

Emira works as a babysitter for the Chamberleins' . She loves her little charge Briar, although she feels preassured to seek a 'real job' by her friends and by her own economic troubles. Emira soon finds herself in the middle of a tug of war between her boss Alix who tries to befriend her, and Kelley the guy she is dating.

So much drama. This is a great example of what performative activism looks like, first Alix is completely nuts, from her obsession to be seen as this wonderful understanding girl boss activist and the down right creepy sense of entitlement to Emira's friendship and intimacy. Like it doesn't surprise me she chose to victimize herself instead of recognizing it had all been a misunderstanding. And even then she still wants to seem atractive to the man she feels victimized by. Girl no.

Kelley is the ultimate fake woke ally. Dude Robbie was wrong period, he had no business inviting people over to someone else's house no matter the color of his skin. You don't get to talk over Emira on matters of what a person of color should do or feel on certain situations. That said it was so funny when he and Alix called each other out for their fetishization of people of color and yet none of them actually gave a damn about what Emira thought/felt/percieved. They just wanted her stamp of approval so they could pat themselves in the back for being such good allies.

8.- The Life and (Medieval) times of Kit Sweetly by Jamie Pacton

🌟🌟

Kit is working as a serving wench at the Castle, medieval themed restaurant run by her uncle, though she really wants to be a Knight, not only cuz the better pay would help around the house but because she really admires Joan of Arc, problem is the Castle management doesn't allow for anyone who is not a cis male to be a knight. Kit is set on changing that.

Ok so I feel a bit lukewarm toward this. Kit in my opinion doesn't get much growth, it seems she just can do whatever and her friends have to be ok w it, her romance w her friend feels pulled out of nowhere like Jett at one point tells her he is not intrested in dating her and then he is ???, those GoT references killed me, I get it I watched the show and sometimes even enjoyed it but it's not representative of anything medieval and Kit was always talking about how much she liked the actual history of the medieval times so...

Also as much as this book was about feminism and how we should fight for equal job oportunities, it feels as though Kit only cared about medieval woman who fought physically and not on the badass medieval woman, like idk it feels as a rejection of tradicional feminity like even the girl playing the Princess is a jerk. But I did like some parts, like her decision to confront her asshole dad to help her mom and the girls training together.

9.-Cien años de soledad de Gabriel Garcia Marquez

🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

En Macondo, una población Colombiana a un lado del río, vemos como una de sus familias fundadoras crece, se expande y cambia a través de cien años.

Me encanto, hace mucho tiempo que no leía una novela de realismo mágico que me provocará tantos sentimientos. Creo que todos los personajes reflejan aspectos de la humanidad tan diversos y complejos que sería inútil tratar de enlistarlos todos.

Ultimadamente siento que lo que condenó a la familia Buendia a cumplir las profecías de Melquiades fue sus propia naturaleza que ellos nunca tuvieron intención de pelear, siempre sucumbian a las locuras o pasiones que los inundarán sin mesura alguna o consideración por las consecuencias. Y creo que aún así lo prefiero pues es lo que hace a cada personaje por confuso que a veces llegue a ser la repetición de nombres (que para mi es el simbolismo de una naturaleza y destino continuos) único e intrigante. En verdad espero que se den la oportunidad de leer este libro por lo menos una vez en sus vidas.

10.-The Monsters of music by Rebecca F. Kenney

🌟🌟🌟

This is a gender-swaped modern retelling of the Phantom of the Opera.

It was creative to make Mel, our Phantom, a true magical creature, and the singing contest was also cool. Like don't get me wrong I did have fun reading this but it also felt pretty unpolished like most characters were teens on the contest and that kinda made me roll my eyes a bit, like unless it's the Voice Kids age ranges are quite ample on this kind of shows, also kinda clumsy the addition of the magical elements with the modern setting, Kiyo didn't make much of an impression with me even when Christine is my fave on the original book. Still if you are a Phan like me you might wanna check this one out.

11.- Anna K by Jenny Lee

🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

This is a modern americanized ya retelling of Anna Karenina.

Not gonna lie this made me cry so much at the end. I really liked Anna and Vronski together so much, and I don't like the love at first sight trope, but here it felt so inevitable. Anna was so self contained until she met him and could truly explore being herself and they really loved each other so much. Also I liked the treatment of the side characters Kimmie and Dustin were well developed and I really enjoyed this one can't wait to get to the second book.

12.- Wonderland by Zoje Stage

🌟🌟🌟

It was ok, but I was actually a bit disappointed cuz I had such high expectations for it. Like for about half the book I was really into the atmospheric vibe the book pulls you into, but as we get the reveal it started to go down hill for me, and the ending left me feeling meh. But maybe it was just not my cup of tea.

13.-Home Before Dark by Riley Sager

🌟🌟🌟🌟

This book is so well crafted!!! I love how it goes back and forth between past and present , first it feels as if history is repeating itself, then as both narratives unfold we start to question and discovering things and the twist at the end was chillin and masterful, I truly and wholeheartedly recommend it.

14.- The Girl with the louding voice by Abi Daré

🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

Adunni, a teenage girl, flees from her husband to work as a maid in Lagos, though everything she has ever wanted is to study.

This broke my heart, as it reflects how people coming from rural backgrounds get taken advantage of in the City, like similar things happen here in Mexico, but also it made me glad to see Adunni fight and keep her spirit so no one could ever silence her.

15.- The Year of the Witching by Alexis Henderson

🌟🌟🌟🌟

Immanuel does her very best to fit in Bethel, follow the scriptures and the Prophets words, but nothing seems to be enough to erase her mother's sin especially when the Darkwood seems to pull her in. As a plague starts to ravage Bethel, Immanuel has to face her past to save her people.

So frickin' good !!!! This story is great, mainly about the explotation of woman and young girls by people in power (in this case a church), the atmosphere is always tense, Ezra and Immanuel 's relationship is very well developed and one can really see how loyal they are to each other. A great option for horror fans.

[robyndehood]

My Son's Story (pt. 1)

DISCLAIMER: I Know it's a bit of a long read, but it's important. Please read. I promise it isn't boring. Thank you!

Hi Everyone,

Intro

This is my first real attempt at Tumblr. Please contact me if anything I post violates a rule or is not considered appropriate. Anything I post, I truly mean no harm nor offense to anyone. But I need to write daily again to regain my gift and share it with the world. I have been working on my version of the "great American novel" for years. As a child, I was well on my way to becoming a successful author, but people had other ideas for my career path - and to put it bluntly - my contribution to society. Writer's block set in and then what was second nature to me - creative writing, became a lost skill. Or maybe a distant memory. Writers know that half the struggle as an artist is the dilemma of our own aspiration towards perfection. But nothing is perfect. It is a social construct and the antithesis of true beauty.

The Ultimate Birthday Gift

So, that said, let's talk about my son. He's three - he's actually turning four in December. He was born on my birthday and has been the greatest gift that I have ever received. I won't pretend that he is perfect or even generally compliant with my directions. But he's loving. He's empathetic. He's brilliant. He's beautiful. And most of all, he is the sweetest person I have ever met.

I am going to go slightly off-topic for a bit; just to paint the full picture. I don't want to ramble and I am definitely a believer that a short and to the point message is almost always far superior to a long and complicated message. But bear with me because this snippet of the backstory is essential. And my son's story is important.

Appalachia

We live in Pittsburgh, part of the Appalachian Mountain Range. There is no other way to say it than the unadulterated, ugly truth of it - Pittsburgh is racist. Very racist. Beyond that, there is a general lack of common courtesy to outsiders, customers of businesses, other patrons in stores, etc. And the rudeness, is actually pretty much unrelated to the racism. It sounds strange and surely, minorities who are on the receiving end of it would certainly assume that racism was the reason why they said "excuse me," "thank you," etc. and about half the time are ignored like they're a ghost. But don't get it twisted - there are many times the aforementioned behaviors by many Pittsburghers IS induced by racism AND a lack of common courtesy and manners. You see, their deep-seated tribalism is indoctrinated into many Pittsburghers so completely from a young age that they know no different. It would be difficult for them to understand this article and I'd bet anyone ten bucks that if enough PIttsburghers read this post - they will attack my analysis of Pittsburghese culture as though the post itself is a blitz on the entire city.

Brown or White?

I am latin and there aren't many latins in Pittsburgh. But when we moved to Pittsburgh when I was in seventh grade, people knew my last name. Summer had just passed and I do get brown. I can get brown very quickly in the right type of sun and I get brown eventually in the sun that exists in cloudy and northern Pittsburgh. In seventh grade, some boys decided it would be funny to call me "estupido," and up until two years ago, I avoided sun exposure that would reveal my "brownness" like the plague.

Subversive, Subconscious, and Secret Racism

So, not long after I started that strategy, I was treated as white. (Side note: latins can be any race; but it seems that societal constructs are seeking to change this long accepted designation and categorize latins as some in between, brown race and not an ethnicity. To be honest, I am ok with that and now proud to be latin.)

The reality of being treated white in Pittsburgh for many years was that I learned what white people actually said when they were only with other whites. The most common thing that was said was one white person mumbling to other white people that someone was a "dumb n******" or a "dumb monkey." I've heard white adults refer to children who were black as "n***lets." But it was always this crocodile smiling through their teeth behavior. They'd never dare say it to a black person. Instead, they'd just indirectly discriminate against them.

I do have to mention that by no means do all Pittsburghers behave this way. It's just too many of them. I don't know the percentage, but if I had to guess I'd say - 50% plus.

Yes, Racism Happens All The Time Even if You Don't See it Happen

Many white people will tell you that racism is gone because they don't ever observe it and Obama was president - a black president. Therefore, everything is now over. I can admit that I have experienced my share of discrimination when my skin darkens. But I had no clue how bad it was for black people out here until my son became the recipient of the ugliness of it all. To me, racists are by definition ignorant cowards; so it makes sense they'd pick on a small boy whose only family is his mother.

Evil Always Starts Slowly

If one reviews history, every evil dictator or regime began slowly chipping away human rights. By the time the citizens realized the dire state of their country, it was too late. Their freedoms were already taken away and mechanisms to fight back had also been methodically erased.

When my son was born - a boy who is half African (his father (if you want to call him that since he is basically not involved) is from Ghana); no issues arose for the first two and a half years. But then the indirect discrimination started. The same rules that applied for white children didn't apply to him. I could give so many examples. But let's just say, as a rambunctious boy, if my son mimicked a white boy's same rambunctious behavior, we were confronted and the white family was not confronted.

One day I made an appointment for my son's hair to get cut at Philip Pelusi. They made the appointment knowing that he was only two and a half. The receptionist let me know that the stylist was a "Grade A Stylist," so I would have to pay more. I was fine with paying more; cool. After the appointment was made, I mentioned to the receptionist that my son was mixed race. We ended the call and I began to get my son ready to leave. Within ten minutes, the salon called back and informed me that they didn't/wouldn't cut my son's "type of hair." I promptly returned the call and explained his hair was curly, that's all. They blatantly lied and told me that the stylist doesn't cut ANY curly hair. Right. So, if a white lady came in with curly hair she would be turned away? I doubt it. Either way, the stylist is "Grade A." She is also licensed to cut hair by the state. Shouldn't a requirement for state licensing require one to know how to cut all "types of hair"?; I saved the recording, by the way, and still have it.

As months progressed, little by little wherever my son and I went in "white areas," we felt hostile vibes. Other incidents occurred that couldn't be proven as racial discrimination, but I knew. Whites behaved as though my son didn't deserve to be around them.

Southern Hospitality

We traveled down south a few times in the past year. Yes, some of the south is very racist still to this day. But not where we drove. Suddenly people responded when we said "excuse me," "thank you," etc. No white families prevented my son from playing with their children. No one told me my son was a nuisance or put out that vibe.

The Lesser of Two Evils?

But we had to come back each time because we live here and I've been working my way out of the projects that I have lived in for four years. Shootings. Open drug use and sales. The smell of crack in the hallways. Infestations in other apartments that come our way no matter what we try. People peeing on the hallway floors. Yes, seriously. Young children being encouraged to bully and beat up other kids. Children stealing or attempting to steal my son's toys because their mothers buy them none. Gamgmembers as young as twelve.

So, I concluded: "yes, we will move, but until then, we only sleep in our apartment and we do not play at the projects' playground." I figured IF I saved a certain number of money since I have a car that I saved for and bought last year, we would make it in our new, chosen city (Tampa or Jacksonville).

But then the racism against my son in the "white playgrounds" became worse. One day he was playing with a five year old boy at an indoor playground. The mother had no issue with it. The father of the boy arrived half an hour in, promptly scooped the boy away from my son, and told his son that he had told him he was not to "play with n*****s." My son couldn't understand why he could no longer play with his new friend and kept calling to him, "friends again!" while sobbing because he thought he had upset the boy. I had to leave with my son because of it.

Another time, a ten-year-old boy taunted my son on an outdoor playground and called him a "dumb monkey." My son first attempted to yell, "I NOT DUMB MONKEY," a few times; but the boy persisted and even smirked in my direction. My son ran to me and asked me to make the boy stop. No parent in sight and again, I just had to leave with my son.

Enough is Enough

Finally, last month or so, my son and I were at our usual laundromat doing laundry. We had finished. My son skipped a few steps in front of me and tried to open the glass door but couldn't push the bar to open it because of his height. He placed (yes, placed..lightly) his foot on the door to try to give it a bit more of a nudge. I was a few seconds behind him so just pushed the door open and we went to our car to load our clean laundry into it. In retrospect, I saw an older white male go next door to the beer store right after we walked out of the laundromar. The beer store employee approached us as I loaded my laundry into my car and then intended to leave.

The beer store employee told me he was getting "reports that kids were kicking glass." He said kids. Plural. And what he said made me envision a bunch of grade school kids kicking around broken glass on the sidewalk or parking lot. I responded calmly that "I have one kid and he's been with me the whole time. He wasn't involved." The beer store employee wanted drama to transpire. It was obvious. He said in a threatening manner: "Just so you know, I have cameras." My son and I exchanged glances because we were confused. What kids? Kids were kicking glass. Where? What glass?

Again though, I calmly responded that my son wasn't involved and he should check his cameras. He told me he was calling the cops. So I got my three-year-old son in his car seat and set a time limit of ten minutes to wait. We weren't running when he didn't do anything. The cops of course showed up about a minute later. It's ridiculous because in our projects (different police department than the laundromat police department), there have been shootings where children were outside playing when several clips were emptied into crowds and the police station is a block away. I know people called and it took an hour for them to arrive on scene.

Long story short, the laundromat cops knew it was a bullshit call. The supposed "kicking glass" was because my son placed his foot on the door to try to open it when we were LEAVING. The police eventually informed us that was the alleged "kicking of glass." There was no kicking that happened. The door wasn't even dirtier, let alone damaged because my son tried to use his foot to open the door. Lightly, by the way.

Even though the police were kind to my son, for the next week, my usual gregarious child was terrified to go anywhere. He eventually told me it was because "the cops will chase me and take me to jail because I bad guy now."

He's over it now. Mostly.

But we still have to pick between the craziness of playing at our aforementioned projects or going to a "white playground" and risking my son being rejected. It's usually a 50/50 shot that he will be rejected. If he gets rejected, he gets very upset.

Again, these are problems we never faced on our travels down the southern eastern seaboard. We didn't get treated like this at the destinations or on the journey by car to and from the destinations.

I knew we were living in an extremely racist and rude area, but one day I found this. It's a map delineating the results of a study conducted by Google and others regarding the level of racism in different parts of the country.

I already knew this much. But it's good to know I'm right that we are in the worst part of the U.S. for racism and the kindness we received traveling to those certain southern states was no illusion. And I did ask locals before I found this map if I was right that people are kinder to all colors in whichever given area.

Not the Worst Thing That Happened But the Last Straw

People talk a lot about Karens these days. This lady looked like she jumped right out of a Karen meme. My son was two feet away from her while we waited in line and she said as obnoxiously as possible: "Can you handle this? Please get him out of MY space." Yeah, I didn't let it go. At all. Her argument was that she said "please" so it's OK to make my son feel like a "this" and not a little boy. I held him while he sobbed. Long story short, I decided right then anywhere has to be better than this.

It isn't me just knowing people are being nasty to my son and I'm upset. He understands. He had an evaluation for something and he tested very well. He cried about each of these incidents. He just wants to make people smile and make friends.

So, next month we are going for it. I'm no where close to the aforementioned goal. I have some savings. We may end up in shelters at first after savings dry up in a few weeks. But we cannot survive up here. Nor can we advance here.

Side Note

I wrote this mostly to inform others of the status quo and reality of racism and the real effects it has on one tiny boy. And I know it will just get worse if we stay since it's this bad already.

But if you anyone knows of any resources to help us get on our feet in a month in Tampa or Jacksonville (Tampa is my first choice, but either one.) I have applied for housing, even though I didn't and don't want to go back to projects; but I'd take one down there over watching my son endure so much pain any day of the week.

Ok, so final part: I'm going to say upfront I feel extremely awkward with this paragraph because this isn't my way (years before my son was born I was homeless for a stint and never sat with a sign or a cup. Just couldn't do it), but for my son, I'm going to drop my cashtag here. Everyone is struggling and I know there are people with much worse problems. I appreciate anyone who has read this far and can help spread the reality of what I wrote about. That's the reason for the article; but if help is received at all because of it, we would be grateful but it's definitely a far second most important reason for the post. Here it goes, for my baby, in case it'll change his life and give us that better foot up, here it is: $RobyndeHood

[citylightsbooks]

Listening as an act of love: Marie Mutsuki Mockett in conversation

This is an excerpt of a free event for our virtual events series, City Lights LIVE. This event features Marie Mutsuki Mockett in conversation with Garnette Cadogan discussing her new book American Harvest: God, Country, and Farming in the Heartland, published by Graywolf Press. This event was originally broadcast live via Zoom and hosted by our events coordinator Peter Maravelis. You can listen to the entire event on our podcast. You can watch it in full as well on our YouTube channel.

*****

Marie Mutsuki Mockett: You don't see me talking about love or the importance of love very much. Maybe I would have a larger Instagram account if I constantly put up memes about love. I should probably do that.

I consider [American Harvest] to be an investigation of something that I didn't understand and that I thought was important. So I asked questions and wanted to try to answer those questions by talking to people who were very different than I am. To sit with them and find out what their genuine experience in the world is, and then see if I could answer some of the questions that I have.

I did not tell myself, "This is a book about love," or "You must employ love." I also didn't spend a lot of time saying to myself, "This is a book that's going to require you to be brave." I just really was trying to focus on the questions that I had and on my curiosity. I was trying to pinpoint, when I'm in a church, when I'm in a farm, when I'm around a situation that I don't understand, what's actually happening. And that was really what I was trying to do and how I was trying to direct my attention.

Garnette Cadogan: But love comes up a lot in the book. And for you, a lot of it has to do with listening. In many ways, this book is a game of active listening, and listening--as you've shown time and again--is fundamentally an act of love.

You decided to go and follow wheat farmers and move along in their regimens and cycles and rituals, and not only the rituals of labor, but rituals of worship, rituals of companionship, and issues of community. When did you begin to understand what is the real task of listening? Because in the book, time and again, you remind us that there are so many places in which there is this huge gap, or this huge chasm, in our effort to understand each other.

Marie Mutsuki Mockett: Well, that is where love comes in. Because that is the only reason why you would spend time listening to people or talking to people. What would be the motivation for trying to be open to others? Why should you be open to others? We don't have to be. So why should one be?

And you're right that things do get reduced down to this question of love. I had always heard that Christianity was the religion of love. And that love was one of the things that was unique about Christ's message. I didn't really grow up with any one religion. Also, my mother was from Japan, so I also grew up always hearing about how for a long time, the word love didn't really exist in Japanese. There really is no way to say “I love you.” Linguists still debate whether or not you can say "I love you" in Japanese and there are ways in which people say it, but it doesn't have the same history, and it doesn't have the same loaded meaning that it does in Western English.

So I was aware from a really early age, because I heard my parents and other people talk about this, that this question of love was very much a part of Western culture and that it originated from Christianity. And I really wondered what does that mean? And if it means anything, is there anything to it? And if there is, what is it? And there's a scene in the book where I talk about my feeling of disappointment that no one had ever purchased me anything from Tiffany, the jewelry store, because if you live in New York City, you're constantly surrounded by Tiffany ads. When you get engaged, you can get a Tiffany box. And then on your birthday, you can get a Tiffany box. And then in the advertisements, the graying husband gives the wife another Tiffany box to appreciate her for all the years that she's been a wife and on and on. I know that that has nothing to do with love. I know that that that's like some advertiser who's taken this notion of love and then turned it into some sort of message with a bunch of images, and it's supposed to make me feel like I want my Tiffany ring (which I've never gotten). That's not love. But is there anything there? And that was definitely something that I wanted to investigate.

I think I started to notice a pattern where I was going to all of these churches in the United States, and I'm not a church going person. And the joke that I tell is that I decided to write American Harvest partly because I wasn't going to have to speak Japanese. I could speak English, which is the language with which I'm most comfortable. But I ended up going to all these churches, and I couldn't understand what anybody was saying. I would leave the church and Eric, who is the lead character, would say, "What do you think?" And I would say, "I have no idea what just happened." And so it took time for me to tune in to what the pastors were saying, and what I came to understand is that there were these Christian churches that emphasized fear, and churches that didn't emphasize fear. And then I started to meet people who believe that God wants them to be afraid and people who are motivated by fear or whose allegiance to the church comes from a place of fear, in contrast to those who said, "You're not supposed to be afraid. That's not the point." That was a huge shift in my ability to understand where I was, who I was talking to, and the kinds of people that I was talking to, and why the history of Christianity mattered in this country.

Garnette Cadogan: So you started this book, because you said, "Oh, I only need one language." And then you ended up going to language training.

Marie Mutsuki Mockett: I needed so many different languages! I mean, even this question of land ownership that we're talking about: I feel like that's a whole other language. There are places in the world and moments in history where people didn't own land. It didn't occur to them that they had to own the land themselves. So what's happening when we think we have to? Like with timeshares. I'm really serious. What need is that fulfilling? And you don't need to have a timeshare in Hawaii, where you visit like one week out of the entire year, right? So what need is that fulfilling?

Garnette Cadogan: Rest? Recreation? I’m wondering . . . has the process of living, researching, and writing this book changed you in any way? And if so, how?

Marie Mutsuki Mockett: I mean, absolutely, but it's so hard to talk about. I think that I have a much better and deeper understanding of the history of our country, and a much greater understanding of the role that race plays in our country. A deeper understanding of the tension between rural and urban, and also of our interdependence, which is something I sort of knew, but didn't completely know. And why just kicking out a bunch of states or getting rid of a bunch of people isn't actually an answer to the tension that we've faced. And it's because there's this great interdependence between people. So understanding all of that and realizing how intractable the problem is, oddly, has made me feel calmer about it. Because I realize it isn't as simple as if I just do "X" everything will be fine. I think, when you feel like, "If I just master the steps, if I can just learn this incantation, then everything will be fine," I think when you live that way, it's very frustrating. And I realized the problems are deeper than that. And some of the problems the United States is facing are problems that exist all around the world. I mean the urban rural problems: it's a piece of modernization. It doesn't just affect our country, it affects many countries.

Garnette Cadogan: You know, we've been speaking about land, God, country, Christianity, urbanity, and in this book, a lot of it is packed in through this absolutely wonderful man, Eric, and his family. Part of what makes it compelling and illuminating is we get a chance to understand so much through this wonderful, generous, and beautiful man, Eric. For those who haven't read it yet, tell us about Eric, and why Eric was so crucial to understanding in so much of what you understood, and also some of the changes that you went through.

Marie Mutsuki Mockett: He's a Christian from Pennsylvania. He’s a white man who’s never been to college, but has a genuine intellectual curiosity, although not immediately apparent in a way that would register to us. Because we're at an event that's hosted by bookstore. So when we think of intellectual curiosity, probably the first thing that any of us would do would be to reach for a book, right? That's not what he would do. He wouldn't reach for a book, he would find someone to talk to. He's a person who is very much about the lived experience. But he was very open to asking questions and trying to understand other people's experiences and how the world works, and he was very concerned.

He was the person who told me in early 2016 that he thought that Trump would probably win, when none of us thought that this was possible. And he said this is because we don't understand each other at all. And he's a very open-hearted, very generous person. And you see him change over the course of the book.

He called me the other day. He said, "I've been hearing a lot about violence against Asian Americans." He's met a couple of my friends. He wanted to know, "Are they all right?" And then he said, "I just want you to know that we talk about racial justice all the time in church," because of course, that's the way that he processes life's difficult questions: through church. And I was kind of moved by that, because one of the points that American Harvest makes is that these difficult questions don't get talked about in church. And he said, "I just want you to know this is something that we talk about." So you see him really develop and change as a result of his exposure to me and to seeing how I move through space versus how he moves through space. And it's a big leap of imagination for people to understand that other people have other experiences that are legitimate and real. It seems to be one of the most difficult things for people to understand, but he really made a great effort to do that. And I think that’s kind of extraordinary.

***

Purchase American Harvest from City Lights Bookstore.

[lytheroom]

A Prose to Her 🌸

I hate her, I truly hate her.

A girl named Mary Ann is a native citizen of Bacolod City in Negros Occidental, specifically in Puntevedra. Her father died when she was 9 years old, only her mother is the one who tooks care of her and her other 5 siblings. Luckily, her mother is a very skilled tailor in their town but it is still hard for their family to survive. Some of her siblings we're adopted for a while by their other relatives. At a young age, she used to work on the sugar cane plantation of their family near their house. She really hates it, sweating underneath the hot sun while carrying the harvested sugar canes. She moved on their another house in the city to escape what she hates to do on their plantation.

At school, she have lots of friends. Some of them are boys who usually ask favors on her, to copy her assignments and copy her answers during exams, so me. She's very generous in that case. Like me, she also hate the Math subject. When they graduated in highschool, all her friends approached her when she went downstairs of the stage to get her diploma, she became the highlight of their graduation rather than their valedictorian.

When she became 18, she had lots of suitors. They we're all attracted to her fair white skin, long silky black hair with bangs, how she style herself and the most important thing, her golden attitude. She was also converted to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints or well known as Mormon. All she ever did was to go on the church activities and Sunday services and stay at her home.

Her life changed when she met an American missionary on their church who was really attracted to her (I forgot his name that's why I can't mention it). They we're both 19, the missionary will go back to his home on America so she asked her to marry him. Marry Ann thinks that she's not yet matured enough for marriage. She refused him but he begged at her and insisted his self. Everyone is approve on the marriage but she really wants to enjoy her life and told them that she will go on college in Laguna. The guy really want her to be with him, he even searched for her but it's too late because she already went up to the ship on her way to Laguna. Again, she escaped.

When she went on Laguna, she felt nervous because she's too young to be apart with her mother. When she crossed the street, she was slightly bumped by a car and fell down. Lots of people saw what happened, she's very ashamed. Not minding the pain that she felt, she rapidly stand up and walk away. Because of the shame that she felt, when she saw a parlor, she went inside and had a haircut. When she came back on the scene of the accident, the man who bumped her keeps looking for her to ask if she's really okay. Not minding them, she walked so fast and felt relieved.

As she stay in Laguna, she was given a chance to study on college but her money is still not enough for her to live and scholarships are very rare at that time that's why she decided to be a factory woker. She also met lots of friends. After so many years the day come that she met a guy and they got married after being linked to each other. Now, the afflictions began.

She needed to cope up with her mother-in-law and siblings-in-law. She suffered lots of things. The guy that she married is the worst man that she could only think. She was pregnant when she had an argument with him that turns into a physical fight. Fortunately, the baby is holding tight on her womb. The time come that she thinks of aborting the child in her womb to escape her hardships but she always think of what she've learned on the church and pitied on the baby. After a months, she labored the child. It was a cute and healthy baby girl. Another year had passed she labored on a baby boy.

Still, the afflictions never stops. She really wanna loose on the chains of loneliness coming from his husband and his family. She wanna separate herself from him but she's thinking about her children's sake. She stand firm with confidence for her babies. Years had passed, she's still experiencing the hardships but her kids grew up already and she had another baby boy and after a few years she had another baby boy. She give everything to her children in order for them to not feel the sacrifices that she had experienced when she was just a kid.

Yes, she's my mother. I am her only daughter and her first born child. I was the reason why she stayed on a filthy path of sufferings and I really hate her. I hate her because she doesn't want me to iron my own uniform. I hate her because she always do all the household chores that's why she keeps calling me idle. I hate her for not trusting me on washing the clothes but she's scolding me because I'm lazy. I hate her because she's the hindrance of my decisions in life. I really hate hearing her loud complaining voice every morning. I feel so uncomfortable to share her what I feel yet I'm still sharing it to her because she's the only one that I have. She's my sister, my basher and my fan and most especially my life giver.

Yes mama, if you're reading this, I want you to know that I hate you for having me because you really suffered for a very long time and I'm really sorry for that. Then I realized that this hate that I feel towards you is the effect of my true love unto you.

[packedwithpackards]

Sneering at "sickly sentimentality": John Hooker Packard's advocacy for gas chambers

Going a complete different direction from my last post, I'm focusing on John Hooker Packard, my ancestor, herein called Dr. Packard, as today is the World Day Against the Death Penalty. As a warning, this article goes down a dark road, discussing death, suicide, and injury. Dr. Packard was more than a person who had a "large practice as a physician" and died from heart disease at the Hotel Chalfont, Atlantic City at age 75 in May 22, 1907, as noted in an obituary in the Philadelphia Inquirer at the time. He was well-known for his medical practice, as was his son Frederick. He was even described in the 1920 A Cyclopedia of American Medical Biography [1]:

"He was also one of the original members of the American Surgical Association…In 1886, in a paper read before the Medico-Legal Society of New York, he suggested the use of a lethal chamber for the infliction of the death penalty, death to be caused by the abstraction of oxygen from the atmosphere and the introduction of carbonic acid gas. Dr. Packard was a profoundly religious man, an Episcopalian…his belief was a vital part of his existence and colored all the important actions of his life. He had very considerable artistic ability and much of his work was illustrated with his own pencil…His culture, geniality and sense of humor endeared him to many, both contemporaries and also many of a younger generation, with all he maintained a pleasant social intercourse."

When reading that, I looked more into the anecdote about the use of a lethal chamber for the death penalty within this biography. While some repeated it without giving any more details, others excluded it entirely from their biographies. This is despite the fact that some even declare he was one of the "most prominent surgeons" of the latter 9th century and a "pioneer of modern American surgery". [2] In contrast to Volume 2 of University of Pennsylvania: Its History, Influence, Equipment and Characteristics; with Biographical Sketches and Portraits of Founders, Benefactors, Officers and Alumni stated he was president of Medico-Legal Society of New York.

At first, it did not seem that this page survived, as it is not within the National Library of Medicine, but after digging a little, I found the paper, which is entitled "The Mode for Inflicting the Death Penalty" and it was actually read before the society on April 1, 1878 not in 1886 as the biography had stated. At first he gives a background and talks about the "humanitarian side" of the equation, noted that many human societies have murderers of people killed. He pushes back against those who view law and order as "oppressive shackles" and claims that the death penalty is calm and dispassionate, not a "physical terror". He does say that executions are public, even if they are claimed to be private, and suggests that instead of other forms of execution (he cites lynching of a Black man as an example, something which he doesn't seem to approve of), people are, instead put in an airtight room and killed by carbonic oxide. He defends this method of killing as painless and not causing suffering. He then sneers at those opposed to such capital punishment, writing:

"Between the sickly sentimentality which wold spare merciless murderers and the brutal ferocity which would exult over their dying agonies, there seems to be a just and wise medium, where the law can take its stand…and yet inflicting no needless torture on the unhappy criminal"

If I understand this correctly, Dr. Packard is saying that death by carbonic oxide does not cause needless suffering and that the form of death he is proposing is more humane. These deaths would also be private.

Carbonic oxide is another name for carbon monoxide (CO). During the Texas power crisis last year, people were poisoned by turning on cars in garages, bringing grills into houses, etc. in an attempt to stay warm. Are those deaths humane? The Consumer Product Safety Commission describes CO as a "deadly, colorless, odorless, poisonous gas"which is undetectable to human sense, and notes that initial symptoms of low to moderate CO poisoning are similar to the flu but without the fever, such as headaches, fatigue, shortness of breath, nausea, and dizziness. What Dr. Packard is talking about falls more into the higher level of CO poisoning which has more severe symptoms, like mental confusion, vomiting, loss of muscular coordination, loss of consciousness, and untimely death. The page goes onto say that those with higher level exposures to CO can "rapidly become mentally confused...[and] lose muscle control without having first experienced milder symptoms". This is echoed by New Health Advisor which states that those who attempt to kill themselves by poisoning themselves with CO suffer a lot, causing their head to get clouded, vomiting and fainting, and are likely to fail.

CO can come from exhaust of internal combustion engines or combustion of various other fuels like wood, coal, charcoal, trash, and so on. It is even more problematic that Dr. Packard is supporting this considering that the Nazis used CO for genocide during the Holocaust, either with gas vans, in so-called euthanasia programs, or in infamous gas chambers. Specifically, it was used to murder over 700,000 people, as gas was fed into tubes at medical hospitals and concentration camps, using exhaust fumes from engines of tanks and other CO. [3] He wants there to be gas chambers to kill murderers. Others who support CO as a way to execute people include an aide of the notorious Jack Kevorkian who claimed it is "extremely painless" and replace lethal injections. It is much more painful than many think it is and is not environmentally friendly, even though it may be a quick death. [4]

Lethal gas chamber at San Quentin State Prison in 1938. Luckily, it is no longer operational.

At the time that Dr. Packard presented that article, there had been the extermination of stray dogs by a CO gas chamber a few years before (he references it in the article) in 1874. It would be followed, in 1884, by a carbon monoxide gas chamber in a slaughterhouse as described in Scientific American. There have been, more recently, CO gas chambers used to kill prisoners at San Quentin State Prison in California, [5] and only closed after public pressure. Currently, the last person to die in the U.S. with a gas chamber was Walter LaGrand, who the state of Arizona executed in 1999. Gas chambers have been rarely used since 1976 for executions.

If Dr. Packard wrote a similar article today, it would likely receive much more criticism. A September 2021 poll said that 54% of U.S. adults favor the death penalty, a five decade low. Additionally, of the over 8,700 executions between 1890 and 2010 carried out by gas chamber, 5.4% were botched, making the "gas chamber the second most unreliable execution method...used in that period". [6] It was, as I noted earlier, prominently used by General Rochambeau against Haitians during the Haitian Revolution, the Nazis, and the U.S., [7] It involves use of CO or hydrogen cyanide.

More recently, in the 18th and 19th century, scientists "suggested a therapeutic application of CO" and it is even seen as a "viable pharmaceutical candidate". Hopefully, Dr. Packard would not be seen as a person of "culture, geniality and sense of humor" for favoring gas chambers, said to be one of the cruelest methods of death, since a majority of Americans believe that life imprisonment with no possibility of parole is a "better punishment for murder than the death penalty is."

Notes

[1] Howard Atwood Kelly, A Cyclopedia of American Medical Biography: Comprising the Lives of Eminent Deceased Physicians and Surgeons from 1610 to 1910, Vol. 1 (W.B. Saunders Company, 1920), pp. 873-874. His son, Frederick is described on pages 872-873 in a biography by Francis R. Packard. The latter also wrote his biography. Francis is Dr. Packard's son.

[2] See page lviii of the Transactions of the College of Physicians of Philadelphia. In contrast, the Encyclopedia of Civil War Biography which has a biography on him, Charles Packard (Lancaster, Massachusetts, Massachusetts Abolition Society, Manager, 1842-44), Alpheus Spring Packard, Jasper Packard, and Theodore Packard (Shelburn, Massachusetts, Massachusetts Anti-Slavery Society, Vice-President, 1836-40), does not mention this. The last sentence is quoting from the biography of him on the American Civil War Medicine & Surgical Antiques website.

[3] This is said to be stated on page 323 of A History of Modern Germany 1800 - 2000. More specifically it is described in horrifying detail on page 156 of Dictionary of Genocide [2 volumes] by Paul R. Bartrop and Samuel Totten.

[4] "Jack Kevorkian's Aide Pushed Carbon Monoxide for Executions," NBC News, Jun. 2, 2014. Also see "Why not use carbon monoxide for executions?" (Quora), "Why do states not use carbon monoxide for legal executions?" (Quora), "Is carbon monoxide poisoning the fastest and least painful way to die?" (Quora), "Why is carbon monoxide poisoning the easiest and least painful way to die?" (Quora), "What is it like to get carbon monoxide poisoning?" (Quora), "Why do people not know they are being poisoned by carbon monoxide? What would it feel like? Surely they notice they start to feel different?" (Quora), "Why Don't We Use Carbon Monoxide for Capital Punishment?" (Reddit), "Recommendation: A Death Penalty with a Carbon Monoxide Gas Chamber".

[5] The prison's official site says "The state’s only gas chamber and death row for all male condemned inmates are located at San Quentin."

[6] Austin Sarat, "Arizona’s Horrifying Plan to Bring Back the Gas Chamber." Slate, Jun. 4, 2021. Also see "Firing Squad to Gas Chamber: How Long Do Executions Take?" in NBC News, "Gas chamber 'ready' for Thanos execution but prison officials say little else" in Baltimore Sun, The Last Gasp: The rise and fall of the American gas chamber, and Gruesome Spectacles: Botched Executions and America's Death Penalty.

[7] It was also claimed to be used in Lithuania (before Soviet occupation in 1940), North Korea, and the Soviet Union. However, for North Korea, claims are reliant on defectors and claimed genuine documents, while for the Soviet Union it relies upon somewhat questionable Russian sources.

Note: This was originally posted on Oct. 10, 2022 on the main Packed with Packards WordPress blog (it can also be found on the Wayback Machine here). My research is still ongoing, so some conclusions in this piece may change in the future.

© 2022 Burkely Hermann. All rights reserved.

[earaercircular]

The Micro Factory, a workshop where they share more than tools

In Anderlecht –one of the municipalities of the region of Brussels-Capital-, the Micro Factory offers a space for inspiration and co-creation to professional craftsmen or Sunday DIYers. The opportunity to share equipment, wishes and skills. And to relocate the production of objects in cities.

A little bit of sandpaper here, a final adjustment there. Against a backdrop of jazzy music, Olivier is putting the finishing touches to the assembly of the Victor Fund[1] book boxes which are about to be placed in two Brussels restaurants. In the metal workshop, a few meters away, Sébastien for his part is finishing the welding of elements for the manufacture of bookshelves for a literary café which will soon open its doors in the centre of the capital. In another room, right next to the common table where we spend as much time "designing on the computer as eating pretzels", Rima shapes table accessories using techniques from the jewellery store.

We are in Anderlecht, a stone's throw from the Brussels-Charleroi canal, where the Micro Factory[2] has established its quarters in an old building of Bruxelles-Propreté[3]. A vast space of 650 square meters where both experienced craftsmen and Sunday handymen and artists come together.

"Here, we are in the soft zone. This partition made with salvaged glass separates what is noisier and dustier from what is less. There is a corner dedicated to textile work. Overthere, these are the screen printing and printing equipment. There, a table for the electronics. There again, a booth for painting and stuff that smells bad ... ", explains Gilles Pinault, taking us around, punctuated by an impressive list of tools that can be found there: 3D printer, thermoforming machine, laser cutting machine, digital milling machine for metal, wood lathe… There are many.

"We could point the finger in any direction, I could tell you a story about the machine," he smiles.

A place to go from idea to realization

While some of this equipment belongs to the Micro Factory, most of it is the property of its users who leave them at the disposal of the community. “The deal is that people can leave their tools in their personal space or in the common. If they're in the common, it's for common use. It works a lot on trust. But people meet there because it is a free hosting of their machines. This saves them having to rent a clean place ", continues Gilles.

Born in the bubbling spirit of our guide, this shared workshop project took a few years to build. "I am an architect by training, I did a little virtual reality and I am rather a handyman in everything", he summarizes. Entrepreneur too, since he was one of the co-founders of Softkinetic,[4] this small Belgian company specializing in 3D imaging and motion analysis software, sold to the giant Sony in 2016. "The archetype of the start-up who has grown up and who is doing the rounds of investors. I saw that what the company needed now was more management and processes, than developing new ideas. “,says Gilles. His thing is to do things. And, obviously, he's rarely lacking in imagination.

Three years earlier, he had set up with his wife and a few friends regular meetings to materialize "lots of ideas that we have always had in mind without taking the time to realize them". DIY workshops, therefore, organized in each other's salons. The embryo of the Micro Factory was born.

But the participants quickly felt cramped. Inspired by American "makerspaces", they therefore set out to find a place where they could more widely express their creativity while sharing their tools. Together, they will thus occupy "a somewhat rotten squat of artists" in Saint-Gilles, then a building on temporary rental in the city centre.

In 2016, the day of Softkinetic's sale, he decided to take the plunge and devote himself completely to the Micro Factory project. He then sets out in search of a "real" building where it could develop and structure itself over time. Renovated as part of projects supported by the European EFRD fund[5], the Bruxelles-Propreté building offers it an ideal base. "We got a reduced rent and a ten-year lease. It is important because we could not cope with the market price. This allowed us to make somewhat ambitious arrangements."

Switch to a cooperative and gain impact

If it functions a bit like a de facto association, the Micro Factory has in practice been created on the basis of an Limited company (Ltd) linked to the former activities of Gilles Pinault. "It was easier to start. Technically, I am the manager, but in practice not at all", explains the person who now has the wish to switch the project under the status of cooperative. A status which corresponds more to the spirit of sharing that he wants to encourage. "This will make it possible in particular to carry out the purchase of machines in common and to involve everyone in the decisions. Today, I still have a limiting effect. People do not dare to do certain things without 'asking Gilles '. It will help them feel at home. "

The project, which he financed largely on his own funds with a few other contributors, must also evolve to achieve economic equilibrium, which is not the case as it stands. "Our break-even point is 9000 euros per month, which means about 200 users. The cooperative will collectively take new directions. Do we want to limit ourselves to 30 hyper professional members who pay € 300 per month or 200 members who pay 45 €? Should we not operate other than by subscription mode and try to remunerate the Micro Factory on the basis of the projects that are carried out there, by highlighting the diversity of skills that are offered? We can take these decisions together, ” he argues.

Pass the series threshold

Currently, most of the creations that come out of these workshops are prototypes or unique pieces. The goal is to move towards a professional production of objects in small series, adds Gilles Pinault. "How to make twenty tables a month rather than three? To have a local impact beyond ideas, we must achieve a more affordable economic dimension. If we want to bring back work and the production of products to the cities, transmit skills, this involves production accessible to as many people as possible without switching to the Ikea model. "

A workshop subscription rather than fitness

Two years later, the Micro Factory has 100 to 150 users, who have subscribed to its subscription system. "It's a bit like in a fitness room. We offer a monthly subscription system that offers flexible access ranges for 50 to 150 euros per month", continues Gilles Pinault, who insists on the continued group dynamic.

"Someone who comes for just an hour to use the machines doesn't really fit into the intended philosophy," which consists of facilitating links and collaboration between participants. It is, for example, the regulars who welcome new visitors and accompany their first steps. The "pros" also advise the "amateurs" and generally speaking, each other's creativity and skills feed on each other.

It is this spirit that excited Olivier who, alongside his work in the field of opinion polls, chose to embark on an activity of craftsman-cabinetmaker. "Rather than settling in my small basement or renting a workshop alone, it was obvious to come here on my first visit", he says, emphasizing the conviviality and the atmosphere that reigns. at the Micro Factory.

"Everyone works on their projects, but there is an exchange of ideas which takes place during the discussions and even in the practical realization. Multidisciplinarity is another interesting aspect that attracted me: being able to move from one area to the next. I am particularly in the process of training myself in metalwork, which will allow me, for example, to offer a table combining two materials. It is really a breath of fresh air to come and work here. "

Source

Gilles Toussaint, La Micro Factory, un atelier où on partage plus que des outils, in La Libre Belgique, 11-02-21, https://stories.lalibre.be/inspire/numero80/index.html

[1] The Victor Fund was created in memory of Victor Van de Woestyne who died accidentally in Brussels on November 4, 2016. In memory of Victor and to give sense to what does not have, his parents decided to create a Fund whose objective is to encourage young people between the ages of 12 and 15 to read. At this age, adolescents discover a new school environment, new friends, new activities. And even good readers often reduce the time they spend exploring books. Through its concrete and targeted actions, the Victor Fund wants to participate in an active, fun and radiant approach in favor of reading. https://www.lefondsvictor.be/ [2] The Micro Factory is a shared manufacturing workshop, based on participation and pooling. It's like a co-working space, but for makers. http://microfactory.be/ [3] Bruxelles-Propreté is a para-regional entity. It acts under the direct authority of the Minister of the Government of the Region of Brussels-Capital in charge of Climate Transition, Environment, of Energy and Participatory Democracy. Bruxelles-Propreté employs about 2,400 people. https://www.arp-gan.be/en/who-whe-are.html [4] https://www.sony-depthsensing.com/ [5] https://ec.europa.eu/regional_policy/en/funding/erdf/

[jeffreyczrf355-blog]

What the Oxford English Dictionary Doesn't Tell You About tesla solar roof

The technology is likely to have the greatest impact Over the next few decades Have arrived. They are not social media platforms. Not big data. And not robots. Not even artificial intelligence. You will be surprised to find out It is the basic technology for digital currencies such as Bitcoin. Which are called string blocks. Chain blocks. Currently, it is not the most resonant word in the world, But I believe it represents now The new generation of the Internet, They carry very high promises for every business and every community Each of you has one individual. You know, over the last few decades, we've had Internet information. When I send you an email, a PowerPoint file, or something else, I don’t actually send you, I send you a copy.

And that is great. This is information that has been democratized. But when it comes to assets - Things like money, Financial assets such as stocks and bonds, Loyalty points, intellectual property, Music, Art, Voting, And carbon certification, and the rest of the other assets - Sending a copy is a really bad idea. If I sent you a $ 100 paper, It is really important that I no longer have money - (Laughter) And that I can't send it to you. Secret code writers called it “double spending” Long time. Therefore, today we rely entirely on big intermediaries - Brokers like banks, government, And huge social media companies, credit card companies and so on - In order to establish confidence in our economy. These brokers perform all business logic and transactions For all kinds of trade, From verifying and identifying people, So settle accounts, settle and save records.

Overall, they do a very good job. But there are growing problems. To begin, they are central. Which means they are vulnerable to hacking, and increasingly - JP Morgan, the US federal government, And LinkedIn, and Home Depot et al They all knew it the hard way. They excluded billions of people from the global economy, For example, those who do not have enough money To get a bank account. They slow things down. It may take one second to send an email to the world, But it can take days or even weeks The movement of funds through the banking system across a city. And they take a big share to do that - 10-20% to send money to another country only.

Seizing our data, That means we can't turn it into money Or use it to better manage our lives. Our privacy is being undermined. In general, the biggest problem is, They dedicated the generosity of the digital age asymmetrically: We have created wealth, but we have growing social inequality. So what if there is something other than the Internet of information, What if there is an Internet value - Something like a wide, global and distributed book of accounts Works on millions of computers And available to everyone. Where any asset type, from money to music, It can be stored, transferred, handled, exchanged, and managed All without strong intermediaries? What if there is an original mean of value? Well, in 2008, the financial industry crashed And maybe that was promising, An unknown person named Satoshi Nakamoto or several people He created a paper where he developed a protocol for digital money Which used a basic cryptocurrency called Bitcoin.

This cryptocurrency enabled people to establish trust and make transactions Without the need for a third party. This seemingly simple act sparked Ignited the world, The thing that made everyone either eager, panicked or otherwise interested In several places. Now, don't confuse it for Bitcoin - Bitcoin is out; This should be your area of ​​interest if you are speculative. More broadly, it is a cryptocurrency. It is not a state-controlled paper currency. That is very important. But the real dowry here is the underlying technology. It is called a series of blocks. So for the first time now in human history, People everywhere can trust each other And conduct transactions peer-item.

And trust is available, not because there are some huge institutions, But because of cooperation and encryption And some smart cipher. Because trust is home to technology, I call this, "Trust Protocol." Now you might ask: How does this work? very good. Assets - technical assets like money and even music and everything that falls between them - Are not stored in a central place, But distributed across a global account book, Using the highest level of encryption. When a transaction is made, Are being published globally, Across millions of computers. And there, around the world, There is a group of people called "prospectors." These are not adults, they are the miners of Bitcoin.

Have enormous computing power in their fingertips - 100-10 times larger than the entire Google global network. These miners do a lot of work. And every ten minutes, In something like a pulse to a network, A block is created All transactions made within the previous ten minutes are booked. Prospectors then began work, trying to solve some difficult problems. They compete among themselves: blockchain solar The first explorer to discover the truth and verify the validity of the mass, Are rewarded in cryptocurrency, In the case of Bitcoin wallet is rewarded Bitcoin.

And then - this is the basic part - The block is connected to the previous block And the former have To create a series of blocks. And each one is sealed at a certain time, In what looks like a digital wax seal. So, if you want to penetrate one of these blocks So for example, if you want to pay you and the same currency, I have to penetrate that block, In addition to all the previous blocks, And all the trade record on that block chain, Not just on one computer but across millions of computers, together, They all use the highest levels of encryption, Based on the world's most powerful computing source And who's watching me. Something difficult to do. It's very safe Compared to the computer systems we are dealing with today. It's a chain of blocks. That is how it works. So the bitcoin wallet is just one of them. There are many others. A Canadian named Vitalk Butterin developed the Ethereum Coin Block Series. He's 22 years old, This block chain has exceptional capabilities. One is that you can build smart contracts. That's what it looks like.

It is a contract that is executed in person, This contract addresses implementation, management and performance And payment - this kind of contract has a bank account as well, For agreements between people. Today, for the Ethereum coin chain, Projects are being done to do everything From creating a new alternative to the stock market Even creating a new model of democracy, Politicians are accountable to citizens. (clap) So, to understand how much radical change this will bring, Let's look at one area, financial services. You know this? It's Ruby Goldberg's machine. It's a ridiculously complex machine that does something really simple, Such as breaking an egg or closing the door. Well, it kind of reminds me of the financial services sector, In all honesty. I mean, your card goes into the store, A stream of information then travels in binary form across dozens of companies, Each has its own computer system, Some are computers from the 1970s Bigger than many people in this room, Three days later, the settlement takes place.

Well, with the help of the financial sector block chain, There will be no settlement, Because payment and settlement are in the same movement, Is just a change in the ledger. So on Wall Street and everywhere around the world, The financial sector is in a major upheaval in this regard, I wonder, can we be replaced, Or how do we embrace this technique to succeed? Now, why should you care? Well, let me browse through some applications. Prosperity. The first era of the Internet, Internet Information, Bring us wealth but not common prosperity, Because social inequality is growing. This is the essence of all anger and extremism And protectionism and xenophobia and worse Which we are seeing rising in the world today, Brexit is the latest case.

So can we develop some new approaches to this social inequality problem? Because the only approach today is to redistribute wealth, Tax people and spread them more widely. Can we distribute wealth before that? Can we change the way wealth is created from the ground up? By democratizing wealth creation, And involve more people in the economy, And then make sure they got fair compensation? Let me outline five ways in which this can be done. number one: Did you know that 70% of the people around the world own land They have a Wahi title for her? So you own a small farm in Honduras, a dictator takes over He says, "I know you have a paper showing that the farm belongs to you, But the government computer says my friend owns your farm.

" This happened extensively in Honduras, This problem exists everywhere. The great Latin American economist (Hernado de Soto), He says that this is the number one issue in the world In terms of economic mobility, More important than getting a bank account, Because if you don't have a valid address for your land, You cannot borrow under it, You can't plan ahead. So companies today work with governments To put land titles on the block chain. If so, this is unchangeable. You can't penetrate it. This creates the conditions required for prosperity Maybe for billions of people. Second: Many writers talk about Uber Airbnb, Tusk Rapt, Lift and others As a kind of shared economy. This is a very effective idea, Together enables users to create and share wealth.

My point is ... These companies do not actually share. In fact, they are particularly successful because they do not share. They bring services together and sell them. What if, instead of Airbnb being worth $ 25 billion, There was a distributed application on a block chain, we'll call B-Air BNP, It is essentially owned by all people Who have room for rent. And when someone wants to rent a room, Enters the block chain data and all the criteria, They help them find the right room, Then the chain of blocks helps in the contracts, They recognize the limb, Handles payments Through digital payments only - built-in system.

They also take charge of even reputable, Because if the room is classified as a five-star room, That room is chosen, It is classified as immutable. So, those who are confusing the common economy in Silicon Valley They may be confused, This will be a good thing to thrive. Number three: The largest flow of funds from developed countries For developing countries Not a corporate investment, Nor is it even foreign aid. They are cash transfers. This is the global diaspora; People who have left the land of their ancestors, They send money to their families back home. Equals this 600 billion a year, and the number is growing, These people are being circumvented. Annalie Domingo is a homemaker. And she lives in Toronto, And go every month to the Western Union office. With some money To send her remittances to her mother in Manila. It costs about 10%; It takes money from four to seven days to get there; Her mother never knows when the money will arrive.

It takes five hours a week to do that. Six months ago, Annalie Domingo used a series of blocks called Apra Using her mobile phone, she sent $ 300. Which went directly to her mother's mobile phone Without going through a mediator. Then her mother looked at her mobile phone - It is similar to the Uber interface, where there is an "ATRA" teller that moves around. I pressed the five-star teller, Which was seven minutes away. The young man arrived at her door, giving her a Philippine peso, She put money in her pocket. It takes minutes, It costs 2%. This is a great opportunity for prosperity. Number four: Data is the most effective asset in the digital age.

Data is actually a new class of assets, Probably larger than previous asset classes, Like land under the agricultural economy, Or an industrial facility, Or even money. And for all of you - we - create this idea. We create this asset, And we leave this digital gesture trail behind As we move forward. These crumbs combine to form a mirror image of you, You are the default. Maybe it will help you recognize yourselves more than what you knew, Because you can't remember what you bought last year, Or say last year or your exact location last year. And you are the default not your own - That is the biggest problem.

So today, there are companies working To create an identity in a black box, You are your virtual king. This black box moves with you When you travel around the world, He is very stingy too. It gives only a small amount of information That it takes to complete something. A lot of transactions, The seller does not even need to know who you are. What they need to know is that they have been paid for. This idea is then embodied in all this data And let you turn it into cash. This is wonderful. Because we can also protect our privacy, Privacy is the foundation of any free society. Let us reclaim the origin we create Under our control, So that we have our own identity We manage it responsibly. Finally -- (clap) In conclusion, number five: There are a large number of content producers Who do not receive fair compensation, Because of that queer IP system. The first Internet age is the reason for being a queer. Take music as an example. Musicians are left crumbs at the end of the entire food chain.

You know, 25 years ago, if you were a songwriter, and you wrote a successful song, Out of a million individual songs, You can get equity for about $ 45,000. Today, you are a songwriter, composed a successful song, You get a million views, You don’t get 45,000, But for 36 dollars, Enough to buy a delicious pizza. So Imogen Hipp. Grammy-winning singer and songwriter, She is currently laying songs on a cluster ecosystem. I called it "Maesilia." It protects intelligent holding songs. The songs themselves protect their proprietary rights. Do you want to listen to a song? It's free, or maybe for a few cents flowing into a digital account. If you want to use the song in your own movie, that's different. IP rights are fully defined. Do you want to make a ringtone? That's different. She explains that the song becomes a business. They are available on this shopping platform for themselves, Protect the rights of its author, And because the song has a push system In the sense of a bank account, All the money flows back to the artist, And so they control the industry, Substitute for these powerful intermediaries.

Now, this. These are not just songwriters, But any content product, Like art, And like inventions, And scientific discoveries, journalists. These are examples of people who don't receive fair compensation, With the help of block chains, They will be able to make money flow in the chain of blocks. And that's wonderful. So, these are five chances Among the dozens To solve one problem, which is welfare, It is one of an infinite number of problems That block chains can be applied to. Now, technology certainly does not create luxury - but humans do But the situation I am presenting to you is, again, That the technical gen has escaped from the bottle, He was called by an unknown person or persons In this vague time of human history, Which gives us another chance, Another opportunity to rewrite the network of economic power And the old order of things, And to solve some of the world’s insurmountable problems, If we do that.