#who will show up in these eventually!

[wolfwillowisp]

Strange Answers to Sensible Questions

And Other Conversations with an Alien Lifeform

On July 16, 2007, the alien being inhabiting the form of an F-22 Raptor sent out the first message since its arrival to the Groom Lake United States Air Force testing facility. The message was an encrypted radio signal that consisted of the following words:

“YOU MAY NOW ASK”

After a moment of deliberation, the first question asked to the being was: “What is your name?” The following is a transcript of the resulting conversation.

[Begin Transcript]

6:15[Alien Lifeform]: YOU MAY NOW ASK

6:17[NASA SETI]: What is your name?

6:17[Alien Lifeform]: ULCHTAR IT MEANS TO THROW ONES OWN HEAD BACK TO THE NIGHT SKY AND YELL

6:17[Alien Lifeform]: LOUDLY

6:18[Alien Lifeform]: YOU MAY CALL ME STARSCREAM

(Note: from henceforth the ‘Alien Lifeform’ will be referred to with the name it requested to be used for it, Starscream.)

6:20[NASA SETI]: Thank you for answering our question Starscream. We believe we have already received this information, but can you tell us where you came from?

6:20[Starscream]: YES I CAN

6:21[Starscream]: I AM FROM THE PLANET CYBERTRON

6:20[NASA SETI]: Can you tell us, in astronomical units, how far Cybertron is from Earth?

(Note: attached to this message was an image file visually showing the scale of a variety of human measurements in comparison to the size of an F-22 Raptor)

6:20[Starscream]: CLASSIFIED INFORMATION.

6:21[NASA SETI]: Classified by whom?

6:21[Starscream]: CLASSIFIED INFORMATION

6:25[Starscream]:NEVERMIND NOT AS CLASSIFIED AS I THOUGHT HEAD COMMUNICATIONS OFFICER DETERMINES CLASSIFIED STATUS OF OUTGOING INFORMATION

6:26[NASA SETI]: Can you get us in contact with your communications officer?

6:27[Starscream]: HES NOT MY COMMUNICATIONS OFFICER HES THE COMMUNICATIONS OFFICER HE DOES NOT HOLD COMMAND OVER ME

6:27[Starscream]: ALSO YEAH ONE MOMENT

6:32[Starscream]: SORRY NO DICE DO YOU HAVE ANY MORE QUESTIONS

6:34[NASA SETI]: How long have you been able to speak and understand the English language, and how many earth languages can you speak?

6:35[Starscream]: LONG ENOUGH AND NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS I AM NO LONGER TAKING QUESTIONS GOODBYE

[End Transcript]

This conversation was considered revolutionary by NASA but it was chastised by the CIA for not probing for more information of the alien’s homeworld or the identity of the communications officer. On August 2, 2007, Starscream covertly contacted a member of the United States Armed Forces on staff at the Groom Lake facility by interfering with their mobile phone. It sent the man, Agent Stanley Burns, the following message:

“HI HELLO IT IS I STARSCREAM CAN YOU DO ME A FAVOR I NEED YOU TO BRING ME 50 POUNDS OF PURE ALUMINUM AND ALSO A BURGER KING BURGER PLEASE”

Agent Burns then left the compound, and was later found in Las Vegas, in the parking lot of a Burger King restaurant with fifty pounds of aluminum sheet metal slabs in the back of his vehicle, purchased from a nearby Home Depot. When questioned, Agent Burns simply replied: “The man wanted his Burger! Who was I to deny him?” Agent Burns, as well as his vehicle, fifty pounds of aluminum sheet metal and one ‘Whopper’ ordered off of the Burger King menu were escorted back to Groom Lake. The items purchased by Agent Burns were then given to Starscream, and had disappeared by the following morning. When questioned, Starscream had only one response.

“WHAT A GUY ISNT ALLOWED TO GET HUNGRY ONCE IN A WHILE? I CANT HAVE A LIRTLE SNACK?”

On August 15, 2007, at 15:10, Lockheed-Martin engineer Alex Witwicky contacted Starscream using a personal ham radio, asking it quote: “Hey uh- A friend of mine over here wanted to know, uh, are you a dude alien or a lady alien?”

Starscream’s response, given on the same radio frequency, was as follows: “Your people’s preconceptions of sex and gender are alien to my own, for I, Starscream am a genderless being with no one clear sex, but if it makes you feel better I can be a ‘dude alien’. If you want me to be.” This radio transmission was the first recorded instance of Starscream’s voice, and was described by Mr. Witwicky and his coworkers as “screechy”, “effeminate”, and “kinda really loud actually”.

On December 12, 2007, Starscream was contacted by the Ohio State University Radio Observatory, asking him on the nature of the infamous “wow!” signal, speculating that it may have been Cybertronian in origin. This was Starscream’s response:

“I DONT KNOW. THATS SCARY. IVE NEVER HEARD OF THAT”

On February 17, 2008, Starscream contacted the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration with a request for data. The following transmissions are documented below.

[Begin Transcript]

7:24[Starscream]: HI HELLO IT IS STARSCREAM I HAVE A QUESTION IS THIS THE NATIONAL OCEANIC AND ATMOSPHERIC ADMINISTRATION BECAUSE I HAVE A QUESTION FOR THEM.

7:25[NOAA]: Yes, we’re receiving you Starscream, what is it?

7:25[Starscream]: DO YOU HAVE SATELLITE AND GEOGRAPHIC MAP DATA FOR THIS PLANET’S NORTH POLE AND ARCTIC CIRCLE AND CAN YOU SEND I AM LOOKING FOR SOMETHING

(Note: after receiving the request, NOAA contacted the CIA, the USGS, and the recently formed Department of Extraterrestrial Communications in order to assess possible security risks in sending the necessary information to Starscream. This lasted until 02/20/08 at 13:04, whereupon then president George W. Bush ordered NOAA to send the files to Starscream, noting, “We want a good relationship with these ETs, we want them to be our allies.”)

13:05[Starscream]: THANK YOU VERY MUCH

[End transcript]

This then ushered in an elongated radio silence from Starscream, who only ever replied once to a radio message from a United States Air Force officer with a simple: “I’m busy. Leave me alone.”

On May 27, 2008, Starscream finally broke his radio silence and sent a single message to NOAA. “Thank you. I didn’t find what I was looking for. You did everything you could.”

[akkivee]

they've been potentially changing a lot with the shadow manga, but since maria's final words to shadow were how she loves him and amy's conversation with shadow in the joypolis collab was about how he is loved, i like to think sonic team is still hinting at amy's ability to touch his heart lol

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Sorry for not having a Year of the Dragon MDZS artwork; Unfortunately, I can only picture Dragon LWJ in this particular flavour.

[hey-hey-j]

lore dropping

(★ my Kofi)

[itty-bitty-sunshine]

Happy holidays <3

They are fine. Probably

[spacedace]

So I've seen a lot of "Jazz works as a therapist at Arkam" in the dp x dc fandom, and while I like the concept, I also feel like Jazz would take one look at the place and immediately be like "what the absolute fuck" at just the everything of the place.

Like, she either nopes out after the tour during the interview or quits not too long afterward starting there, not because she can't take it but because she's so appalled by what's going on there and can smell the corruption rolling off the place and knows no one sent to there is ever actually going to get the help they need.

So Jazz decides to open a private practice instead while still being absolutely determined to work with the various rogues in the city, she is here to help and nothing is going to stop her.

So she just starts showing up at known hangouts of rogues and during their heists/schemes/sprees, and even fights between them and the batfam, just like

"Hi! It’s so nice to meet you! My name is Dr. Jasmine Fenton/Nightingale/whatever last name she’s using and I was hoping we could talk!"

Casually kicks a baterang away without looking because she's being polite and professional!

"I understand that your experience with therapy through Arkam has been nothing but atrocious and that you are rightfully -"

Kicks Batman away without breaking eye contact or a sweat.

"Suspicious of attempting therapy again, and Idon't want to force anything on you, therapy should be on your terms after the experiences you've had but -"

Grabs Robin out of the air as he leaps at the rogue she's talking to and tucks him under her arm, ignoring his feral hissing and all attempts to break her hold.

"-I really think that you'd find it beneficial, even if I'm not the right therapist for you."

The rogue in question is having the time of their life and takes Jazz's business card - and a few extra to pass around - not really intending to actually ever book a therapy appointment with her but way too entertained and excited to share this madness with everyone else.

But then one of the rogues actually looks up Jazz's website and sees all the various safe guards she’s put in place to ensure that any villians that come to her will be protected while seeing her - soundproof therapy room, regular sweeps for listening and tracking devices, the most insane firewalls and protections anyone has ever seen on her network, and ooh she provides snacks and drinks!

So someone finally books an appointment with her, half convinced she's either going to turn them in or is a villain herself intent to experiment on them, but then it’s actually really nice??? And they feel a lot better afterwards?? She doesn't even say anything to indicate that she wants them to stop being villains, she just wants them to be okay??

So more and more rogues start going to her, and Batman was already losing his mind about this woman before - Oracle can't hack her system?!? And her background check shows a totally normal Psychiatrist?? - but now half of Gotham's heavy hitters and a dozen or so other minor league villains are seeing her regularly and every time he tries to get info on any plans the rogues might be scheme via her office it fails utterly. Nightwing got knocked out with something called a creep stick and when he tried to break in himself to get answers she just appeared out of no where and gave him the most scathing lecture about doctor-patient confidentiality before bullying him off her property and threatening to sick her brother on him if he tried again?

And because she's become such a figure in the Gotham underworld, she gets the attention of Joker.

And everyone, rogues and Bats alike, are terrified that she’s going to try and take him on as a patient like she has so many other villains in the city and that's just a recipe for tragedy.

But then the Joker is on his way to the hospital with two broken legs and the fear of god beat into him babbling about eldritch nightmares and whenever anyone asks Jazz what happened she just shrugs and just says things like "I refused him as a patient, he's not my problem." Or "My brother doesn't like clowns." And just, does not elaborate.

Batman is losing his mind over it all. Jazz is just happy to be able to actually help the rogues. Arkam is less happy about how she absolutely destroys their reputation.

[queenkinqs]

people love to talk about invincible for it's over the top gore and violence, but i really do think the show's writing is at it's best when it's just two people have a conversation

[stars-obsession-pit]

(Another) Ghost in the Machine

DP x Hellblazer (the original John Constantine comic)

Ritchie Simpson continued to search frantically for the connection out of the computer and back to his body as he begged John to explain what he meant by saying “Goodbye.”

Had John disconnected him? He knew John’s sense of humor wasn’t the lightest, especially after Newcastle drove them all a bit insane, but that felt too far even for him. Nah, he’d probably just gotten himself a bit lost in the wave of energy he’d experienced in the Tongues of Fire network and was accidentally looking for his body in the wrong spot.

He pulled himself back and let his mental connection to the digital world expand outward, probing the rest of the machine for the connection. He knew he was in the right system, so as long as he looked thoroughly he’d definitely fi—

Everything flashed a surge of blinding white and then was replaced by pure darkness. He thought he screamed, but he couldn’t hear his own voice. Couldn’t even feel his own thoughts. Trapped in one single instant that stretched for indeterminable eons. Then, eventually (or was it immediately?), awareness began to trickle back.

He was still in the computer, though it felt… different, somehow. His thoughts still weren’t entirely in order. The first possible hints towards his location he found were the sound voices trickling through from the outside world. Voices he didn’t recognize. Young voices.

“I’m happy to help, Tuck, but I’m not really sure what you expect me to do here. You’re way better than me at this computer stuff than me.”

“By all means, feel free to keep complimenting me, but this has been frying my brain, man. I got this thing secondhand, and the system should be quite powerful, but there’s something using up a ton of its processing and I can’t figure out what. I was hoping you could do your ‘enter into the computer’ thing and see if you see anything.”

[imaredshirt]

Mystery Trio AU where Stanley and Fiddleford fix the portal but instead of Stanford coming back, they get pulled in.

And they're stuck there.

It's not so bad, Stanley reasons. At least here nobody knows him. In this weird space between dimensions, Stanley Pines has a clean slate. He can start over. He and Fiddleford can find Stanford without any dumb lawmen or old business associates or IRS agents sniffing after them, because why would anyone be after him out here? As far as anyone beyond the portal knows, he's got a squeaky clean record - never conned anyone, never stole anything, never moved any controlled substances for any old buddies.

They can do this, he tells Fiddleford. It'll be fine.

It's not until the first interdimensional bounty hunter guild releases a public statement announcing NOTORIOUS INTERDIMENSIONAL CRIMINAL STANFORD PINES FINALLY LOCATED, TRAVELING WITH UNKNOWN HUMAN, MASQUERADING UNDER THE NAME OF STANLEY PINES, BOUNTY FOR LIVE CAPTURE INCREASED - it's not until he sees this that he realizes that for the first time in his life, Stanford's fuck-ups are getting him in trouble, and not the other way around

[trappedinafantasy37]

I went to a very old save of mine in which I knocked out Minthara in Act 1 and I talked to her again in the throne room. If you knocked her out, this is how she looks at you when she questions you:

She seems genuinely disturbed over your actions. Can you blame her? You were the one who knocked her out. You brought her harm for reasons that she cannot understand. She can understand someone killing her as that is what she expects of those around her. She will criticize your choice of sparing an enemy and showing mercy to someone you have greater reason to kill. Even though she has doubts about you, she shuts herself down, thinking she should be more grateful rather than doubtful of you.

You can tell her that you saw her as a potential ally, but she will call you a hypocrite as Gut and Ragzlin were not shown the same mercy, nor was any other True Soul.

You can even tell her, "You were simply too stubborn to die" as a means of trying to take any culpability off yourself. To try to turn the situation into a little jokey joke. However,

Minthara does not take it as a compliment and she knows you are full of shit. Even though you took the "good" path, she does not trust you.

Minthara understands mercy and even she believes some people are deserving of it. Sadly, she does not see herself as one of those people and is disturbed as to why you gave her mercy. There is no answer you can give her here that will make her trust you. She knows you went out of your way to spare her and only her, and that frightens her.

Remember, this is not the first time in which Minthara's entire army was killed right from underneath her and she was deliberately left as the sole survivor. Orin slaughtered all of her men in a blink of an eye, and Orin's "mercy" only brought her pain and torture. Later down the road, Minthara criticizes herself for not paying more attention to Orin when she first arrived at Moonrise. And so she is giving you a lot of attention, she is watching you, studying you, because she fears that you are going to hurt her the moment she takes her eye off you. Because you already have. Your "mercy" gave her a concussion, your deception had her found guilty of incompetence, and she was then subjected to even more torture by the Absolute in which she was given permanent brain damage. She is afraid that the only reason that you spared her, is because you want to torture her. Even when you show up in Moonrise and enter into her mind prison, she is expecting you to kill her and begs you do it quickly. She is not expecting mercy from you, only death. She is only in that predicament because of you. Why would she think for a single second that your mercy comes from a place of good intentions?

She knows fully well that she owes her life to you and that her life is entirely at your mercy, one you can revoke at any time. She doesn't trust you, she doesn't trust the rest of the companions, but she cannot leave nor walk away. There is no good way out of this for her and she's afraid of the cycle repeating. She is not going to make the same mistake again. Instead of her oath to you being from a place of affection, her oath to you comes from a place of fear.

[starry-bi-sky]

danny and officer martinez's relationship in "late at night, when the nightingale sings" in a nutshell:

Martinez: FREAK! GET YOUR FUCKING KID!

Battinson, on the other side of the crime scene: he don't bite

Martinez, with Nightingale firmly attached his arm, visibly biting him: YES HE DO!

*points at them* Danny is the Bugs Bunny to Martinez's Elmer Fudd.

Another Officer: i can't believe you're fighting with an actual twelve year old. Martinez: i swear to god that is not a twelve year old, that is a little hellion that crawled out of batman's shadow one dark and stormy night and decided to dedicate his existence to tormenting me. Officer: Are you really that mad about him putting a sticky note on your back-- Martinez: thats not the point

in danny's defense: the word "freak" is. a mini beserker button for him for.... obvious ghostly reasons, so like, even if its not directed at him, he still very much unappreciates Martinez's insults at Battinson. Danny may or may not be projecting.

he's not going to hurt the guy! not in any serious or permanently disfiguring way at least! But he is going to leave mean sticky notes on the square part of his spine that he can't reach, and stick salt in his 3AM Late Night Crime Scene Coffee, and kick the bottom of his heel while he's walking so he stumbles. And other petty, infuriating things that tally up and boil over, over time.

[captainkirkk]

Natsume has spent the past two seasons running himself ragged, often to the point of collapse or near-death, while trying to help the people around him. And yet he still believes this??

[daisybell-on-a-carousel]

"Jason was the happy robin" this, "jason was the angry robin" that. Let's all be fully honest here Jason was the lonely robin

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

As an owner of an xxy calico Jin rusong as an xxy calico is both so fun to see but so fitting and so sad in context of your warrior cats au

May I offer you a small consolation in the form of a slightly older Jin Rusong kitty?

[ovrrdogg]

Hfjone au where instead of kidnapping people for his reality show he accidentally discovers twitch and starts a stream and becomes the most popular twitch streamer ever. People love tuning in to watch forest man and his wacky antics. They love the “larp.” Twitch keeps trying to get him to come to cons he can never attend. People make wildly popular edits and gifs of him to share on stan twitter.

Instead of getting people to entertain him, he works to entertain people.

[coldflash-corner]

Speaking of Barry being able to read Leonard Snart scarily well, imagine that Barry notices how Snart reacts to people Barry knows, and files that away in his opinions of that person

Barry is in the cortex with someone he finds kind of annoying but harmless, Snart walks in for Definitely-Not-Flirting-While-Doing-Business Reasons, and starts lowkey acting like this guy is an Immediate Threat that he's trying to act cool around to not set him off. And Barry immediately knocks like 5 points off of the "how much do i trust this guy" ranking. Subtly starts telling him less things, looks into what he's doing on the downlow, treats him as potentially suspicious And turns out... The guy does have bad intentions

Leonard comes in and meets some of Barry's new friends/coworkers, and clearly seems to mark one of them as more trustworthy/less of a threat than everyone else. And when Barry needs help or someone to confide in, he goes to that person over everyone else

Barry comes in to Saints and Sinners and sees a regular he's run into before, but hasn't seen interact with Snart. He thought the guy might be pretty cool. But today he walks into them talking, and Immediately sees that Snart is closed off, jumpy, does NOT like that guy in his space. And Barry immediately takes cues off of that, turns the guy down when he later asks to have drinks together next time Barry drops by Saints

If Snart seems unnerved by someone Barry knows, Barry trusts his instincts. Even if Leonard never says anything to Barry out loud, he still takes note of that. If Snart likes someone, or just thinks they're reliable, Barry will trust that instinct.

Even if Snart doesn't say his feelings out loud, Barry trusts him so innately that he will listen to Snart's instincts when it's clear he's feeling a type of way