#who no one else wanted to play with bc they didnt speak spanish

[abra-ka-dammit]

a video of a comedian with tourette's crossed my dash a couple days ago and i keep thinking about it because i realized id never actually.... experienced someone with tourettes? like it was a Concept in my mind that i knew existed and was out there but i'd never encountered it, and finally seeing it happen with a real life person was... idk, kinda jarring? because watching him i was like. yeah... if i didnt know what was going on id be pretty freaked out by that thing he keeps doing. and since my main touchpoint of tourette's knowledge was a south park episode largely mocking it, i only had a vague idea of what a real person with tourette's was like. obvs i knew it was more than randomly screamed obscenities but written descriptions of tics really dont do the actual acts justice when seen live, so it really was like. being slapped in the face with A New Thing I Don't Understand--which of course depending on the person can either lead to fear-based hate or acceptance of the new thing. i like to try to be the latter person.

and in my life, honestly just plain exposure has almost always been what makes me emotionally connect with "minority" groups, especially of the medical variety. its easy not to empathize with groups you don't belong to if you never actually have to see or hear them. it's easy to hate, then, too. without exposure to them, "people with tourette's" can just be a theoretical group of people you don't need to care about, because hey they must not number enough to matter because you don't think you've ever met one. hell, maybe they're not even real! but being introduced to real people who are Real Dementia Patients, Real Autistics, Real Tourette's Havers, etc.... seeing their human faces, hearing their human voices, seeing their movements and behaviors, learning about who and what they are and their experiences as that minority from their own lips; it helps you see them as human, and their status a human one.

theres not really an ending thought here. just having that wild experience of seeing something atypical "in real life" and coming to terms between my instinctual "what the fuck" and my logical "he has a disorder" to meet at "that's a person with a life experience I will never have or truly understand but i have no reason to discriminate against them for it, because they're really just another person"

[monstraduplicia]

tagged by @emiliosandozsequence <3

tea, coffee, or soda? i dont like coffee or tea like. at all so i guess soda?? but i dont drink that very often. i mostly drink water or flavored water

dogs or cats? cats i guess? i like that theyre low maintenance. ive lived with cats my entire life but i think i would be better with no pets at all. im not very good with animals

can you play an instrument? nope!! not at all. tried to learn the guitar when i was a kid and gave up after like a month. i have very little like. determination

what’s your sun sign? im an aries sun, sag moon, and libra rising

first song lyrics that pop into your head? "god is a place you will wait for the rest of your life / two headed boy / she is all you could need / she will feed you tomatoes and radio wires / and retire to sheets safe and clean"

do you have any tattoos? nope!!!

favorite place you traveled? sweden!! it was so lovely there. i wish i could have lived there longer i really miss it. the food was phenomenal

what’s the last movie you watched? run!! it came out a couple years ago and has sarah paulson! it was pretty good i liked it

what languages do you speak? only english bc i am absolutely terrible with languages. took hebrew for 7 years in school and i didnt learn shit. took spanish in high school and didnt learn shit. took german in college and, surprise, didnt learn shit. im just always really bad at translating. my memory is bad

do you have any hobbies? do reading and watching movies count as hobbies? bc if so thats all i got. i used to draw but i dont really do that anymore

you can hang out with one fictional character for an hour, who do you choose? probably ghost from lost souls by poppy z brite bc hes sweet and a good listener and we could talk about music together

compliment yourself: im really good at my job. my coworkers think of me highly and i've proven myself to be skilled. thats all i got

tagging: @sourkitsch @angelcuttongue and anyone else who wants to do it!!

[libretitamortal]

I’d love to hear more of your Tony/Maria thoughts. For me I liked their meeting better in 21 and though I miss the light heartedness of their relationship, it was interesting seeing Maria point out a lot of societal issues to Tony. It’s a difficult couple to write Imo

Omgomg i finnally have the chance to go off

They sure are difficult to write i mean with what happened in the fight, with bernardo and riff and chino and then tony going to maria like nothing happened and begging (but not really) for her forgivness bc a womans love clears all mens sins.... i cant be that mad tho there's just something very special about them, for me at least, but some of it did made me mad in 2021 and i'll tell you why.

Well, i'll begin the the good bc i do agree with you nonny, i really loved how active Maria was in this ver, it felt like a different character than 1961 in some ways, it's as if she had more screentime too and i smiled every time she spoke bc she was speaking in spanish and in facts. How she spoke her mind to her brother and sis-in-law and then to tony to tell him how pointless and ridiculous a fight between both sides is bc one side is in clear disadvantage against the other... and bc she just doesn't want anyone to get hurt!!!!!! And what bothers me about the train scene is that tony was always trying to get the conversation to focus on him and his side, and yk what i get it! Riff is his bestie but why is he constantly bringing him up to get Maria to stop talking about stopping the fight.

another thing is that Maria also talked about her future plans, going to college, and doing something with her life (which wasn't something she brought up in 1961) and it just never gets adressed ever again(?) It could have been useful to support their plan to run away together but it just wasn't used because of reasons.

And then we have tony *takes a deep breath* i have a problem with 2021 tony and i'm tired of pretending i'm not. I'm gonna ignore the fact that he was played by *@&#*$&#*$# and go straight to the way he was writeen. It was fine until that scene in the mini market *cries in latina* and then he said he wanted to find a puerto riqueña girl just like doc because???? I dont even remember but thats enough for me to remember, it felt like he just wanted someone like that bc he envisioned the "perfect couple" and thats what it looked like (and tbh i feel as if he didn't change that mindset much but anyway). And the way he cuts maria off when she's talking about something important, more important that whatever relationship he has with his ex gang, is just weird.

There was something else about tony but right now i dont remember ;-;

Now....what i really have a problem with is the way THAT scene on the bedroom was handled. I know it's like the most controversial part of the show bc why would Maria sleep with the guy who killed her beloved brother. But at least 1961 tony explained why he did it, he said he had no choice bc her brother had killed his bestie (still questionable but yeah) and 2021 tony explained....nothing he didnt say a damn thing to try to get maria to calm down a little, he just stayed there waiting for maría to get over her completely understandable breakdown and he was ready to go before making sure she was ok i'm- *flips a table*

I guess there are other things that people smarter than me could point out but this is just what came to my mind first.

Even as i say all this, i really love wss 2021, every musical number is larger than life and the way so many things changed form 1961 and worked better than 1961 makes me so happy. This was actually the only movie i was excited for during the last 3-4 years i think. But 1961 is also close to my heart bc there's something about that ver that is really dreamy (the meeting scene for example) while 2021 went for a more realistic aproach. I love both of them. But i'm a sucker fo the "and the world disapeared leaving only them" trope in romance.

I could go on and on about what i liked about wss 2021 but this is already a long post 😭.

But yeah i think my biggest problem with this ver. is tony and maria's relationship. Everything else was chef's kiss.

[uwumessenger]

random headcanons i have for each om! character teehee

hi it's been a while since ive posted some hcs bc uni has been kicking my a$$! luckily i only have a few papers to tidy up and im done. here r some hcs for each obey me character that ive accumulated over the past few months wink wonk

most are random but some constants you'll find are what i think they smell like, languages they can speak (other than their native (demon/angel) and eng/jp), and music tastes !

lucifer

i have a strong feeling that he showers twice a day: in the morning after waking up and at night before going to bed

his cologne is probably the type that will last in an elevator for like a week after he uses it once. i dont think this mf ever smells like anything other than his cologne

has a secret folder on his phone of semi-nudes and other scandalous pics from when he felt sexy at the time omg

aside from demon language/eng/jp he can speak french and knows latin

listens to classical stuff yea but he also listens to diavolos mixtapes (re: diavolo's section)

not a fan of sweets but will eat sweet things when craving

really bland sense of humor...borderline cringey 😭✋🏻

mammon

has gone to google images and searched for "inspirational quotes tumblr" "gold aesthetic tumblr" & "relatable crush post tumblr" then reposts it onto his socials or just taps thru them and giggles bc he relates

his cologne doesnt last as long as lucifers and probably smells common. he has to reapply a lot but it's a people pleasing smell. it's cheaper hence the constant reapplying

he probably does have an expensive bottle but is the type to totally overspray...eek

he is canonically a car guy 🥲 and probably tells the one in his room good morning & good night + kisses the hood every once in a while. has tons of car magazines

he doesnt really speak other languages but has attempted to learn spanish before

listens to whatever is on the radio. doesnt rly stan anyone but he eventually will listen to mc's playlist and mc's playlist ONLY

levi

lurks on mc's socials ALL THE TIMEEEE like he will rewatch ur stories and scroll thru ur feed and overanalyze ur tweets/rts or blog posts. if ur mc isnt the type to use sns much he still googles ur name all the damn time just to find any sites u might be on fjdjdjdjskks

probably streams on whatever youtube or twitch devildom site equivalent there is, but only has like 40 or so followers. which he is okay with!

until he sees someone else who gets more attention than him. then the envy starts kicking in bad. especially if they suck 🧍🏻‍♀️

classic gamer boy smell. you know, sweat, tears, must, and (sometimes) axe deodorant. lucifer has to do a scent check before he goes out to any event & lets him use his cologne. how sweet!

kpop stan!! more girl groups than anything and his ults are probably GIRLS GENERATION, wonder girls, twice, loona, & red velvet

cried when ioi disbanded and refused to leave his room. the only thing u could hear was downpour on loop at full blast

can also speak korean & communicate in echolocation like dolphins 😏

satan

listens to country music you cant change my mind

smells like whatever environment he is in. he doesnt really have a designated smell just throws some deodorant on and goes about his day.

he's sooooo bad at driving...gets road rage way too often so his license has been REVOKED

but hes totally a backseat driver. needs to be sedated on long trips

do not let him watch finding nemo when luke asks to watch it. it's not worth it. he will cause mass destruction.

if he was a human or lived long term in the human world he totally has the ability to be a doctor

is studying as many languages as possible, but he mostly knows latin & french & german etc etc. wants to learn all the dead languages out of curiousity

asmo

dont think this mf has ever held down a relationship. ever

he doesnt compromise much & is not willing to change his lifestyle to fit an s/o into it. you keep up with how he lives or it just isnt meant to be (but dont worry! he'll eventually learn...maybe,,,,)

has the hardest time out of everyone when it comes to breaking bad habits

his smell varies bc he uses a variety of perfumes (whatever is the most popular at the time) but he probably sticks to floral and fresh scents. he never uses generic people pleaser scents like mammon

listens to electropop, mainstream pop, & some alternative rock

as for languages he too knows french, spanish, italian, etc. in general, if it's a romance language he knows it!

opposite of lucifer in the sense where he loves sweets and will refrain from eating too many bitter things

i think we all know that asmo is the biggest rockstar of the group! he's probably been in a boy band at least once, but now he makes his own music

has tried to teach mammon how to sing once. ended up in a broken piano and bleeding ears...

beel

i feel like he is SO SHY

like unless ur close to him he will not start conversations or anything

i think he listens to r&b a lot ! and jazz 😎 maybe rock as well

smells like ur typical athlete with undertones of wet wipes. he carries them around bc he likes to clean his hands before he eats & is prepared for when theres no sink nearby

he can drive and he drives really well. no rough turns, parallel parks perfectly, and never has problems with merging

driving with beel is probably really soothing. left hand is steering the other is gripping ur thigh 😫

dont think hes really fluent in any other language but hes probably semi fluent in korean because levi wanted beel to help him out

definitely know how to order food in practically every language tho HAHAHA

belphie

he reminds me of randall from monsters inc

smells kinda musty IM SORRY but not the way levi does hes more like the kind of musty u feel or smell when it's a shitty morning

but that's only because hes so lazy, when he cleans up hes like satan

has definitely murdered multiple people before. mc is not the first 😐✋🏻

with that being said belphie has been put into prison at least twice when visiting the human world, the mf had such a strong hatred for humans theres no way he never got into trouble before

lucifer probably broke him out and they used the pen thingies from men in black to erase everyones memory of that 🙄

dont think he listens to anything other than music that'll put him to sleep. really likes lazy song by bruno mars but thinks that bruno mars put too much effort into the song. should have been one acapella verse and then finish

similar to beel hes only semi fluent in one language, probably french bc of lucifer. doesnt remember much but knows a couple of lullabies and bedtime stories

the sandman used to be his bff until they drifted. they do, however, like and comment on each other's sns posts.

diavolo

once he found out who nicki minaj was he became her #1 stan

def an ariana grande stan too 😌

choreographs dances when hes stressed...idk just seems like a diavolo thing to do

also makes rly bad soundcloud rap music sometimes. turns to poetry when hes feeling emo but only lucifer knows this. barbatos is suspicious of him but doesnt have enough evidence to confirm.

his dad is like hudson abadeer from adventure time aka marceline's dad? something must have influenced him to want to unite the 3 realms + he would need the approval to do so, so his dad must be more chill than all the others before him 🧍🏻‍♀️ IDK ok anyway

currently going through his hamilton phase bc of mc. whether mc's intent was to get him hooked onto it or just to explain it bc of something he saw online, he tells everyone that he found out abt it bc of mc!

this man cannot drive his skills are only second to jumin han

not too fond of many languages but knows the widely spoken ones like spanish, mandarin, etc. if it's taught in high school he knows it

smells like a las vegas casino. not sure why but i feel like he does. but there's also an interesting & nice smell to him if he embraces you. it's a smell you cant quite identify. but it smells nostalgic, it's mysterious, and it's tempting.

barbatos

very calm demeanor but underneath hes WILD hes probably done everything at least once oof

he just has a lot of control and stability over himself (must be nice!)

on a more angsty note i feel like he might have had his heartbroken sO BAD IDK he is hurting and maybe that's why hes so willing to obey diavolo and not abuse his time lord power thingies bc he learned his lesson the hard way

mans is so smart he knows every language you could switch languages mid conversation with him and he wouldnt be thrown off. he'd probably start speaking it too.

BUT HE SPEAKS VIET P E R F E C T L Y

listens to the same stuff as lucifer but also likes eminem. likes the movie 8 mile but criticized it heavily

have you ever been to a chinese herb shop? naturally, he smells like that. his room probably smells like it too. he doesnt really have a significant smell like some of the others

when he bakes he smells like whatever hes baking tho

one of the few out of everyone listed to have been able to travel to literally everywhere

solomon

was probably on kitchen nightmares once, but only to get feedback from chef gordon ramsay. then he used his magic to prevent the episode from airing...

was in an orchestra, one of the best times of his life. played the violin. asmo watched him in the audience once, but didnt approach him until well after that performance.

he CANNOT sing. he can, however, rap.

doesnt listen to music. he listens to podcasts! but every now and then he turns on background music, but prefers it to be instrumental stuff

never wears sunglasses. also does not have a driver's license. cannot drive a regular car. could maybe fly an airplane.

due to his immortality he has learned almost every language to exist, but finds himself speaking mandarin the most. knows most dialects too

similar smell to barbatos but u can also smell some sunscreen on him too. like, generic beach day suncreen

he has a lot of pact marks, so he once had the idea to match foundation to his skin. it took him two weeks but he eventually perfected a combination. yes he will help u find ur perfect shade if u ask him to

simeon

another country music man. has also made a tiktok or two to that one song that goes "he cant even bait a hook." they are private tho

angel country music exists and simeon invented it

if he visits the human world and wears more causal clothing he probably tucks his shirt into his pants

wears a speedo at the beach i tell u, speedo at the beach

he can speak german...i can feel it

uses his pointer finger to type and holds the phone like 2 inches away from his face so sometimes his nose will push a key hence all his typos

has no signature smell. he simply smells like your favorite scent all the time. if multiple people are around him at once, everyone smells a different smell. it's pretty rad

"what does he smell like to himself?" u may be asking. hmm...a church? 💀

luke

his first pet was a goldfish and a few months before the exchange program happened, he was given a koi pond!

secretly likes hanging out with levi sometimes just to play with henry. makes him miss his pet fish back home

so his favorite movie is probably finding nemo and he threw a fit when nemo touched the butt

luke is probably learning german bc of simeon, though he'd like to learn more of the dead languages just for fun

i dont think he listens to music often or has any preferences, he just listens to whatever is playing on the radio

but he finds himself listening to the music mc listens to

smells like freshly baked goods all the time. or fresh laundry. but like, not combined. just depends on the day

[freakygirlie]

Walker- 1x04 ~spoilers~

I know i’ve said this a dozen times...but Walker just keeps getting better and better and better! With every. single. episode. I loved everything about this episode so much and again! Jared live-tweeting it was the best!!! I watched this episode at 3 am lats night again help.

~spoilers~ last warning!!!

OK SO CRDIREZ BEAUTY EPISODE!!! YES! I loved loved loved loved the development of their friendship in this episode SO MUCH! 

First scene Cordirez and them badass rangers catching bad guys together YES!!! Walker trying to find out Micki’s middle name is so cute pls. 

I really enjoyed the case they worked here as well. It was both deep and emotional and that twist! YEPPPP SIGN ME UP.

THE BAR SCENE WITH WALKER AND MICKI. AGAIN THEIR FRIENDSHIP! The episode title fit so well here and I’m glad Micki and Walker have really reached a good understanding on a friend and partner level. THEY\RE THE CUTEST PLEASE I LOVE THEM. 

‘‘walker where’s my drink’‘ ok every word micki and cordell exchanged with each other was the best??? 

WALKER AND HIS KIDS AND BROTHER UNPACKING TOGETHER!!! I asolutely adore their relatioship. AUGUST IN THAT BLUE HAIR AND SUNGLASSES DHJHHF AUGUST I FUCKING LOVE YOU CAN I ADOPT YOU.

I really adored the tiny exchange between Stella and Walker. Speaks volumes of how much they’ve progressed since the pilot. Walker and Stella’s dynamic I ADORE so seeing them at really good terms is just beautiful.

Annnddd now August is being the rebellious kid. 

I’m glad they brought up Belle’s case here as well bc i thought they’d completely overshadowed it. STELLA AND BELLE ARE SO CUTE! I WANT SO MUCH MORE OF THEM

OK NOW IK I SHIP CORDIREZ TOO BUT I SHIP TRICKI TOO. GOD.

They are so so so CUTE WITH EACH OTHER AND TREY IS JUST THE BEST I LOVE HIMMMM. 

Micki is such an epic artist??? HOLY SHIT GIRL HOW MUCH TALENT DO YOU HAVE HIDDEN IN THERE.

Micki and Walker working the case ‘off the books’! YES PARTNERS IN CRIME. or well soving crime. i didn’t like monty shaw too much anyways...idk bad vibes. WALKER DEFENDING MICKI AND SAYING SHE CAN FEND FOR HERSELF. I COMBUSTED.

THE CORPSE LADY WAS THE SAME ONE FROM SUPERNATURAL’S NIGHTMARE 1X14. HOLY SHIT.

*sigh* The Harlan Family. Classic Rich People.

‘‘can we keep this one off the books’‘ ‘‘OFF THE BOOKS???’‘ ‘‘are you kidding me off the books is my middle name. Just kidding it’s Beauregard what’s yours’‘ HHAHAH NICE TRY WALKER I LAUGHED SO HARD THEY’RE ADORABLE.

Cordell Beauregard Walker- such a fucking handful!

THE INTERROGATION SCENE. WHEN THAT GIRL WINKED AT WALKER AND HE JUST FLINCHED AND TURNED AROUND LMAO. WALKER WHAT HAVENT U HAD PPL HIT ON U BEFORE.

‘‘You got it ranger rick!’‘ PLSJJCDDFJFD. ‘‘that was so satisfying’‘ same micki same.

‘MICHELLE FLORIANA’‘ WOW??? I LOVE IT.

ALSO MUSKRAT! ADORABLE SO ADORABLE I WANT CORDELL TO CALL MICKI MUSKRAT ALL THE DAMN TIME.

‘‘on a scale from micki to muskrat where am i’‘ ‘‘floriana’‘ THAT LOOK THO.  HSHSHSHS DONT WORRY WALKER YOU’LL GET THERE.

-I love how this show is really taking the time to address the difficulties someone like Micki- A Female Latina would go through- the sexism, blatant disrespect and disregard. Micki’s character is also something that’s very well written and acted(Lindsey ily) and portrayed extremely well. One of my favorite things about Walker is how he really trusts Micki, views her as an equal, and wants to earn her trust, not demand it. It’s perfect(cordirez breakdown time). Micki is also slowly letting her fences down around him and it’s a huge and very delightful to see step. I love and adore their friendship and chemistry so much. 

MICKI SPEAKING IN SPANISH IS AN OFFICIAL TURN ON FOR ME BYE.

ALL OF THEM SOLVING THE CASE TOGETHER!!! NOT JUST CORDIREZ BUT TREY TOO! WALKER AND TREY MEETING TOGETHER WHEN.

Trey is such an amazing boyfriend truly! THE TOWEL ON HIS SHOULDERS DJSFDJFD AND AH THE COMIC MICKI DREW??/ ADORABLE. Also love how encouraging and supportive Trey is. The men in this show are the best.

LIAM AND WALKER SCENE. I love their dynamic too and i wanna see moreee. Also more micki and liam scenes yes please.

‘‘thanks brother very supportive’‘ i sobbed when he called him brother. i just. *screams*

Ok so Abby and Bonham really had a bad falling out huh. Abby was in an affair with someone who still misses her??? Damn, can’t wait to see how this one progresses. ALSO WALKER FINDING THAT LETTER FROM GARY TO ABBY IN THE BASEMENT I FREAKEDDD,

THE ADDRESS. ON THE LETTER. IS THE SAME. AS THE LOCATION. OF JENSEN’S BREWERY. THE SAME BREWERY. WHO’S FIRST KEG OF BEER. WAS GIVEN TO JARED. BY JENSEN. ON HIS BIRTHDAY. HELP. HELP. HELP. NOT ME HAVING A J2 BREAKDOWN IN THE MIDST OF A WALKER EP AT 5 AM IN THE MORNING.

Aight so August and Ruby is a biG NO OK. Like idk idk idk just idk.

WALKER HAD AN AFFAIR(after emily so ok but still) WITH SOMEONE ELSE WHILE UNDERCOVER??? WAS IT JUST UNDERCOVER OR REAL??? I NEED ANSWERS STAT.

THE PHONE THAT WALKER HAD. ONE OF THE CONTACTS WAS WINCHESTER AUTO. W I N C H E S T E R  A U T O. Jensen coming to the show owning this shop and Walker going to him to get his car fixed when Jared Padalecki.

MICKI AND CORDELL(AND TREY!) SOLVING THE CASE TOGETHER!!!

‘‘micki gives a play by play of the security footage’‘ ‘‘we’re watching the same thing micki’‘ *bitchface* PLS I LOVE THEM.

Holy shit Mrs. Harlan having an affair with Monty??? ENZO BEING BOB’S SON??? HOT DAMN THE CASE CONTINUES. Again. LOVE THE WORK/FAMILY BALANCE.

OK OK SO THE SCENE IN WHICH MICKI AND WALKER CONFRONT SHAW AND THE LOOKS THEY GIVE EACH OTHER BEFORE MICKI GETS IN THE CAR WITH SHAW WHEN THE MUSIC STARTS PLAYING!!! YES. YES. MY SOULFOOD.

I loved the way they worked it out. Phonecall, recording everything, THEM PARTNERING AND WORKING IT OUT SO BEAUTIFULLY I NEED SO MANY MORE CORDIREZ CENTRIC EPS YALL DONT EVEN KNOW.

‘‘walker! bulldog it!!’‘ HSHJDSHDSJ YES.

PLS I SCREAMED WHEN SHAW PULLED THE GUN ON MICKI.

BUT SHE IS SUCH A FUCKING QUEEN BADASS I LOVE HER.

Success!!!! The Micki and Walker and Larry scene at the end was so cute! I like how they’re actually invested in their jobs and want to do good it’s so heartwarming.

WALKER CALLING TREY TO FIND OUT MICKI’S FAV THINGS!!! I LOVE HIM SO MUCH! Also I genuinely love that Trey wasn’t weirded out by it or jealous or anything.  Can’t wait to see them interact I NEED IT!.

‘‘thanks for believing in me’‘ ‘‘i didnt. i trusted you.’’ HELP STOP MY FEELS.

‘‘thanks beau’‘ don’t mention it flor’‘ I DIED I DIED I DIED. MICKI AND WALKER I LOVE YOU. JKSJD MICKI WARMING UP TO THE MIDDLE NAME. THEIR FRIENDSHIP IS THE BEST.

That last scene with Walker and his mom was so touching. Walker’s relationship with his parents is so sweet. His mom hugging him and comforting him when Walker said he missed emily so much *cries* I just wanna hold him please. 

August being worried for his father’s happiness I JUST. YOU SWEET BOY. I really think messaging Twyla was a baaaaddd move though.

WALKER AND AUGUST SELFIE. The way Walker so easily just picked his son and brought him to him, made him family photographer and that scene. THE BEST. 

I genuinely don’t think anything happened between Twyla and Walker. But we’ll have to see.

oKAY SO. Captain James??? It’s just an on and off thing. Do I trust him? Do i don’t? Why did he take those surveillance vids out??? I trust Liam with it and i’m glad he’s looking into it and all. Hopefully it doesn’t backfire badly. I have a very bad feeling that James had something to do with Emily’s death.

THAT STELLA AND BELLE INTERACTION. SO CUTE. Stella giving that jar of jame to try and make up and Belle being all cute and funny I love them. For a sec i was so scared Belle might yell at her but I’m very happy to see that they’re going strong despite all the circumstances- Belle’s parent’s deportation.

ALSO TREVOR IS SO HOT??? I like him and Stella they’re cute. Stella so obviously has a huge crush on him and they ride horses so well together. HHAHAHAH THAT DANCE STELLA DID WHEN HE FOLLOWED HER ON INSTA. SO RELATABLE.

The last Tricki scene mY HEART. ‘’you wanted a hero so you drew one. then you became one’’ Micki is going to be such an inspiration I love her. And the way they interacted, Trey getting a job!!! And Micki’s excitement, THEIR HUG!!! ‘’hugging is one of my superpowers’’ TREY BARNETT I LOVE YOU.

THAT LAST SCENE WHY LEAVE IT LIKE THIS. WHAT IS HAPPENING WHY DOES WALKER OR DUKE APPARENTLY HAVE TO GO BACK.

Anyways! As you can see the entire episode was so enjoyable and I loved it. The best part of this was definitely the Cordirez friendship development and i cannot wait to see where it goes from here!

Speculation/Thoughts for Episode 5:- So it’s for sure that Walker is going back undercover as Duke who’s a baseball...person? Idk he was wearing a baseball hat so :) Walker’s past is now very much mixed in with his present and I AM SCARED. What he’s doing is yet to be revealed but Tywla is coming back and that will just. mess. things. up. The scene in which Walker is yelling at August GOD SO NOT READY FOR THAT. It feels like him and his kids might go back to how they were before. I really don’t want that to happen. Also why am I expecting a major cliffhanger. 

HEY BUT THERE’S SHIRTLESS WALKER AND! MICKI RIDING THAT MECHANICAL HORSE IN A BAR OR SMTH AND MORE INSIGHT INTO WHAT TREY IS DOING SO IM VERY EXCITED ABOUT THAT.

And it’s going on hiatus. Idk how to deal with that. :(

[suggable]

Im going to write down my second experience seeing Day6 live mostly for me, but feel free to read it after the break if you want (please do not reblog it tho) ✨ a little warning i’ll probably get very emotional and personal and this is going to be Very long and probably will get incoherent at some point!!!!!

I saw Day6 yesterday in Madrid for the second time, and not to be dramatic but it was probably one of the best experiences of my life 😭💕 I already had lots of fun last year but this year’s concert was not only fun but very meaningful for me.

As some of you may know I finally finally finished this week my architecture studies after 6 and a half very long and tough years. The last two have been especially hard, aproximately the same ammount of time I’ve been following Day6 closely. When I first discovered their music I immediately fell in love with it, and I fell in love again when i got to know them. I can positively say they’re the closest artists to my heart, my soulmate band. I do love and appreciate a lot of other artists but the way I love day6 it’s.... unparalled. I’m gonna stop being cheesy now hfjjsjka but knowing that I was going to see them again and meet them after all the constant exhaustion that my master’s has been has given me so much strenght during those all nighters and endless days working on my project kjfdkjjks 

I’m privileged enough to have been able to get vvips tickets this time but tbh that’s not important, the whole experience of the concert it’s what makes it worth it. Me and my friends decided not to go queueing very early bc we wanted to be well rested and we knew we were going to have a good spot in any case. We were so lucky yesterday’s weather was sort of warm, considering our awful awful experience from last year jkdjkskj. I’m so happy we were so prepared this time, we brought lots of snacks and blankets for the queue. We also prepared some fanart freebies to share and trade and it was the nicest experience, everyone there was so so lovely!!! I had such a great time only waiting in line and chatting with myday ^^ After we got out numbered wristbands we picked up our signed entropy copies. I got the “Sweet” version which is my fave!!! I traded around the pcs so i ended up with all Sungjin and Dowoon jhjfhjsdj (and the loveliest Dopil pc 😭❤) I was so happy we didnt have any trouble with queueing or numbering this time!!!!! Then we went for lunch and almost didn’t make it back on time bc it took us ages to get out meals n we wanted to leave all the heavy stuff and coats at the car jdfjkdkjskk but!!! we made it thanks to the lovely people next to us in the queue!!!

We finally got into the venue (which is so big!!! and we filled it!! im so PROUD) and my friends were headed to the left side where Jae is but I noticed the middle section was also kind of empty so we ran there kjkjfd and ended up in 2nd-3rd row!!! so we were in the middle and had a great view of everyone ^^ i felt kind of bad bc the people around us had been queueing from 3am and we’d arrived at 8:30 :P also next to us there was this korean girl who runs a Dowoon fansite and she was very nice and polite and she must kind of hate now me a bit bc I didn’t stop moving and jumping  i hope her pics came out nicely anyway!!! we only had to wait for an hour inside n we had lots of sweets to keep our energy up so it was quite alright :)

when they boys came out i noticed i had the clearest Sungjin visual so I ended up looking at him most of the time kjfjdkkkdksd i just couldn’t help it like the pics don’t do him justice he’s just so cute and expressive and makes the funniest faces when playing!!! and sort of bounces when playing which is the Cutest thing!!!!  there was some sort of problem with his guitars at first n seemed a bit annoyed but it turned out alright!! I also paid lots of attention to Jae bc he has Such Energy performing, the truest hype man!!! when he plays you can see he’s genuinely enjoying himself and loves myday so so much :(((( he interacted a lot with us!! 

Dowoon was also in front of me but he was covered most of the time by his drumset :(( I could see him making all these baby bird pouty faces or mouthing the lyrics and it was.... so CUTE :((((( he’s so cute i 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 also i was in awe at his drumming technique like he’s so so so talented and you can clearly see how much he loves it!!! He’s the best boy!!!

I had to move my head a bit to see YoungK and Wonpil and I tried my best looking at everyone when they were singing, but my eyes would automatically go back to Sungjin jfdjskjkaskj I can tell you Young K is very VERY Atractive when performing, he has a sort of magnetism!! He also seemed soooo happy and would jump around non stop and smile at the fans and just Bless us in general!!! Wonpil was sort of serious when playing but you could tell he was concentrated !!! Also his piano and dj skills im!!!!!! like when he plays the Time of Our Life intro so easily!!! i play piano and let me tell you it is difficult as Fuck!!! he truly is so talented!! plus when he was talking with us he was so playful and cute :(((((

Some concert Highlights for me: hearing Best Part live, also So Cool, TOOL, Headache, wanna go back!!! how to love!!! SWEET CHAOS!!!! also hearing WARNING again which may easily be my fave song of them now (well no...we all know it’s impossible to pick just one but yeah jkdfjskkç) also Colors!! when the first chords started playing i started tearing up n then the chorus came n i just broke down crying jsdsk I also cried during I Need Somebody and that bit when we sang back to them and we sang I Smile :((( also the fucking SOLOS hello most talented band in the universe????!!! but like for real they all sound so good live!!! i love that you can clearly hear the drums and keys and all the instruments, plus their vocals are just!! so!! good!!!!!! Jae and Young K went Mad with the adlibs I was living my best life!!!!! 

at some point i locked eyes with Sungjin n my potato brain decided the best thing i could do was to send a flying kiss his way so i did n he got so SHY!!!! and made a 😳😳😳😳 face jkdfjkjkjks i felt v awkward afterwards like i didnt know he was going to react that way jfdkjksa 

Also hearing them speaking spanish...fucking surreal...but when they did their ments in English!!! wow!!! they’ve gotten so good!!!! they kept saying they were so happy and this was the best way to end the tour and they’d grown so much, and reminding us to always be happy i :((((( Wonpil’s ment was the sweetest thing and he sent such an important message and I started crying again (and i made eye contact with Jae while ugly crying so i had to hid behind my banner jkdskjjkjdskks) and couldn’t stop through the whole length of their ments :(( i barely remember anything from young k’s bc i was trying to compose myself a bit jkfkjkjd Dowoon’s was so cute!!! He’d wait for the translator and make such funny faces i :((( Sungjin’s English and like Everything about him im so gone kjfkjjkds and then JAE’S...........

that was truly the Highlight of the night, what truly truly made everything special and what i hope will make them cherish and remember this night forever. So a bit of context: we had prepared a project where during For Me we would take out some prints of some of Jae’s encouraging and inspirational tweets and held them up. So at first Jae was surprised but I guess he didn’t have the time to read which specific tweets we were holing. Then during like the second half of the song he realised n got like v serious like he was trying not to cry...I remember Sungjin also realised bc he was looking at Jae just Knowing.... When we took the concert pics Jae asked us to take an extra one with the tweets bc he wanted it for himself....and then his MENT he thanked us for listening to him and letting him know we hear his words and basically acknowledge and validate him when he passes those life lessons to us and that it meant more than we could imagine....and he was getting more n more emotional n trying not to cry but im p sure he did...and then Sungjin and Wonpil came to his side n started doing this weird dance around him hdjfjjkskjsdkjskkkladsslk n cheered Jae up THEY’RE SO PRECIOUS :((((  but like moments prior u could see Sungjin just Waiting for it n smirking jkjkfdsjkjkkjs also the fact he immediately tweeted about it after the concert 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

the whole hi touch thing was such a fiasco but tbh i didnt have much hope to begin with jkfdjkdkjs they made us wear face masks as a prevention for the coronavirus break.........but it didnt really matter bc there was an insane number of vips so we were a LOT of pple for the hi touch...we were rushed n pushed n screamed at by both security n mmt staff....i was laughing at the whole absurdity of the situation n wonpil saw me hjdfkjksjks...we barely had time to say something and high five them but i did manage to say thank u to each of them n look them in the eyes at least!!! (they’re so beautiful from upclose!! and GIANTS! and sungjins eyes.........otherwordly) i felt so bad for the fans that were looking forward to it and for them as well bc you could see their apologetic faces....but anyways everything else went so well im not going to dwell on that!! so yeah i’ve met day6 but i barely remember anything kjjkdsjkd it feels like a fever dream :((((

but tbh considering everything it was the nicest experience!!! im so happy i had the chance to see them again n i hope they come back again!!! also i really wish they’d tour more cities, like there are so many mydays that deserve to see them too :((( 

ok im done with this whole essay like i could keep rambling and rambling but this is the most essential of it!!! if you also read this thank you!!!! please be happy and trust and listen to day6!!!❤💖💕✨🌟

[scige-archive]

welcome 2 my twisted mind ex dee ?

PREFERRED NAME — james uwu

PRONOUNS — she/they

AGE — 20

TIMEZONE — est

HOW OFTEN ARE YOU ONLINE? — everyday all day usually hjfdnkmg

HOW DID YOU HEAR OF WATERSHED? — i actually first found lockwood while going through the recommended blogs on mobile when you search up things via it (i think it was ‘new rp’ tht i searched) n then the next i checked they’d gone ovr to watershed n then there were Other Things bt i didnt end up joining until a few weeks or like a month later impulsively n now its been many months n im still here BJDNSKFMG love u guys

DISCORD — sniff #3644 where im also always online

OTHER SOCIAL MEDIA YOU’D LIKE TO SHARE — musing @svrgcnts​ n my pinterest is ‘big tid’ or offbrandsodapop uuuhh i dont think theres anything else!

MYER-BRIGGS — infp turned istp we call tht character growth

HP HOUSE — i honestly dont know anymore ive gotten all of the houses before bt ive just taken a test n i got slytherin so like :///

ZODIAC — aquarius!

DO YOU BELIEVE IN ASTROLOGY? — not to the point where it dictates who i like / dislike

DO YOU ENJOY ASTROLOGY? — ya im a slut for when things tell me what im supposed to be like bc i dont have a sense of identity

HOW OLD WERE YOU WHEN YOU STARTED RPING ON TUMBLR — uh like 19 bt ive been rping since i was 10

WHAT YEAR WAS IT? — early 2018 so actually i might’ve been 18 for a lil bit DJNKFLG

NAME A RANDOM ROLEPLAY THAT STICKS OUT IN YOUR MEMORY — listen i’ve had many, many good experiences bt for some reason what came to mind first was a weird owner/slave smut rp tht i stumbled across (never joined bc im ... not like that) n i was just rly baffled by the concept even tho ik its a Thing bc i thought smut rps died out like in 2017 BJDNFKMG

WHAT WEIRD ANIMAL WOULD YOU HAVE AS A PET IF IT WAS REALISTIC — i want a fucking capybara

WHAT PET DO YOU GENUINELY CONSIDER GETTING SOMEDAY? — i want a cat even though im rly allergic to them

NAME THE FIRST SONG ON YOUR DISCOVER WEEKLY ON SPOTIFY OR THE FIRST SONG THAT COMES ON APPLE MUSIC / ITUNES SHUFFLE — the apocalypse made me brave by girlfriends

NAME A BOOK THAT YOU READ IN SCHOOL THAT YOU SURPRISINGLY LIKED — um probably like ,,, the crucible ,,,

NAME A BOOK YOU HATED THAT MOST PEOPLE LIKED — god i dont know i’m not hard to please bt i wont lie i also like ... didn’t finish half the books i was supposed to read in high school. of mice & men maybe ... i hated books that didn’t do much n just wrote a whole bunch of nothing even tho i like those books now ... i think bc they were for school ... outside of school i hated the hazelwood n i think that the grisha trilogy is a bit. weak. bt i love six of crows. n also the um. theres this one YA series tht i never read bt i can tell i dont like NJKSMDFFDG

WHAT TV SHOW DID YOU RECENTLY BINGE? WOULD YOU RECOMMEND IT? — schitt’s creek DSJKNFDGF um i’ve also been watching gossip girl a lot & also asoue & also also i just started watching um end of the f***ing world n its very good so ?? i watched the first episode of his dark materials n i liked it n i havent finished looking for alaska bt its also very good

WHAT FILM DID YOU LAST WATCH? DID YOU LIKE IT? — uuuhh i think it was scream tbh ??? and ya it was p swell

FAVOURITE QUOTE — im a slut for anne carson bt i cant name any quotes directly rn i have rocks for brains

LINK TO A VINE / TIK TOK / VIDEO THAT EXUDES YOUR ‘ENERGY’ — this immediately came to mind

DO YOU WRITE OUTSIDE OF RP? WHAT DO YOU WRITE? — i used to write outside of rp bt i havent in ages bt when i do its usually like modern magic / urban fantasy / whatevr those kinda elements n abt faeries bc i like faeries

THREE YOUTUBERS YOU STILL LOVE & TRUST — jenna marbles, micarah tewers, and uh ,,, claire frm bon apetit

A CELEBRITY CRUSH THAT JUST WON’T QUIT — cary elwes ... andrew scott ... anne hathaway ... first three tht came to mind

EVER MEET A CELEBRITY? SHARE YOUR STORY — no bt david dobrik was in miami and i was NOT and im UPSET bc i want his MONEY

WHAT’S YOUR PICTURE-PERFECT NIGHT? — i am not in pain. thats it thats all

A CONSPIRACY THEORY YOU KINDA BELIEVE IN — jeffrey epstein was murdered haha jk thats not a conspiracy theory thats FACTS

ARE ALIENS REAL? — ya sure why not

PLAY ANY PHONE GAMES? WHICH ONES? — lily’s garden please play im level 1241

PLAY ANY OTHER GAMES? WHICH ONES? — i played all the bioshock games n rly enjoyed them ... deponia the entire series which is still my favorite video game 2 this day

WHAT’S A FILM YOU LOVED WHEN YOU WERE YOUNG AND RECENTLY WATCHED, ONLY TO FIND OUT YOU DON’T ANYMORE — i never finished my rewatch of the golden compass bt thats just bc i didnt feel like finishing it uuuh ... i dont know i enjoy things too easily

DO YOU COLLECT ANYTHING? — buttons n seashells and rocks and flowers until theyre dead and then i collect dead flowers and then empty glass bottles that look kinda cool and jewelry boxes or tin containers and i used to kiss an index card every time i wore lipstick and kept it, i had over 100 filed away for no reason at all bt i lost them & then i also collect condoms :/

WHAT’S SOMETHING YOU WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT BUT YOU’RE TOO LAZY? — i wna learn how 2 make jewelry n like ,,, embroidery bt i know how to embroider i just wanna get back into it n i wna learn like. knowledge. academic stuff too bt im also too lazy and im just a dumb old horse so :/

THREE LANGUAGES YOU DON’T SPEAK, BUT WISH YOU COULD — italian n french n ig spanish too

MOVIE YOU’VE WATCHED MORE THAN 5 TIMES — shrek ? austin powers ? princess diaries / elle enchanted ?? halloweentown n all the sequels ??

NAME A FICTIONAL CHARACTER FROM TV/FILM/MOVIE/GAME/BOOK THAT YOU FIND YOURSELF PROJECTING ON / YOU RELATE TO — shawn spencer frm psych, veronica mars, penelope garcia frm criminal minds, mike myers’ cat in the hat, dr. evil frm austin powers bt also his son scott evil, scooby doo probably, daria ??? i relate to my dog bodhi :/ puddles the clown

IS THERE ANY MEDIA (BOOK/MOVIE/GAME/TV SHOW) YOU FEEL CHANGED YOU IN SOME WAY? — six of crows / fleabag / deponia theyve all made me cry before bt like. continuously cry.

DO YOU FOLLOW ANY SPORTS? WHO DO YOU ROOT FOR? — no.

HOBBIES BESIDES WASTING AWAY HERE? — um. redacted

PLUG A TV SHOW / MOVIE / BOOK / VIDEO GAME / ETC… YOU WISH MORE PEOPLE WOULD CHECK OUT — big fish directed by tim burton go stare at danny devito’s bare ass do it do it do it i never even finished the movie i dont think BJNSKDMLFG

TEAM EDWARD OR JACOB? (IF NOT APPLICABLE, WHO DO YOU LIKE MOST IN THE TWILIGHT SERIES) — edward

LAST MOVIE SEEN IN THEATRE — um thts rly hard bc i dont know bt i have a ticket so let me just check ,,, the joker i went n saw the joker

DO YOU STILL READ FOR FUN? — occasionally bt i dont have motivation so

IF SO, WHAT ARE YOU CURRENTLY READING? — n/a BDKFJ

ON A SCALE OF 1-10, HOW MUCH DID YOU HATE FILLING THIS OUT? – 5 bt thats just bc im not feeling gr8 today

[kae-karo]

[1] hi!! so idk if you've seen dan speaking at the mental health panel or not, but there was one part that hit me really hard and id love to know your thoughts on it! basically he was saying that often content creators, and people in general, are struggling with their mental health the most when it seems like they're thriving (uploading constantly, getting good grades, etc) but everyone thinks they're fine. which is literally my life rn but i can't take a break from overworking myself bc i need

[2] to get into college. do you have any advice abt how to provide for my future while still taking care of myself? also, i just want to thank you for running such a healthy and positive blog bc it has helped me thru some difficult times, and you seem like such a thoughtful and caring person!

hi dear! oh no :( I'm so sorry, that's such a hard position to be in - I havent been in school for a few years, and not in high school since 2012 yikes lmao, so I'm sure things have changed a bit but hopefully I can still give some advice that helps?

I'd say first and foremost, talk to a trusted adult you know in person about how you're feeling - whether that be a parent, older sibling, favorite teacher, advisor, etc. they may have advice more specific to your situation that might take into account details I dont know. and while this is my first piece of advice, it can also be the hardest? sometimes facing our demons and being honest about them with others who have only seen our "good side" can feel impossible, but it can be a crucial step to help build a support system that you can go to when you feel you're struggling

the next thing I'd say is, on a small scale, start taking time for yourself. I know that's like. the hardest thing to do when you have like 6hr of homework a night, minimum, plus clubs or sports or other activities that take time, but literally even sneaking five minutes between some bits of homework to do something that's calming and centering for you can make a difference - if you can grab five minutes to go sit in a space you feel comfortable, away from your work, to breathe and think about something other than your work, that can be helpful

the next one is sorta like. tangential, but take care of your body as well - you're still a growing and developing human, so this is ESPECIALLY important, but drinking lots of water (and not too many sugary drinks/chemical drinks) and eating veggies and getting enough protein can literally make such a big difference in your brains ability to function at it's best. the other important thing here is sleep - every body is different, so keep in mind what your body does best on and (when you can) aim for that. between hydration, good nutrition, and sufficient sleep, you're laying a foundation that can help your brain be more successful throughout the day

I wish, ultimately, i had a perfect answer for the fucked up school system (esp in America which is what I'm most familiar with), but it honestly sets you up to fail. what (unintentionally) worked well for me was having a blow-off class or two - classes that were easy for me (like sign language, or French 1 after I'd already taken Spanish for several years) and could help boost my GPA without stressing me out as much. if you can find those classes- and definitely look for the ones that are easy for YOU, don't just ask around for the easiest classes - that can be a really nice break in your day and help relieve you of some after-school stress

here's another "honesty is the best policy" situation - if you find yourself struggling to understand a concept, or homework is taking you so much longer than some of your peers (or the teacher says theres only an hour of hw a night and you end up spending far longer on it) talk to the teacher! tell them you're struggling, and ask if you can get some help understanding a topic. be specific about what you dont understand (dont just go "I dont get it") and explain your thought process - this can help teachers understand where you're veering off the path and what you might be missing. and, more importantly, if you're coming in for help, they're more likely to be lenient with you because they know you're trying (yes I'm aware that was more a "school help in general" bit of advice but in case that's something you're struggling with)

now heres....maybe some controversial advice. take calculated risks. example: if a teacher has a policy where they drop your lowest homework grade in a class and you're doing alright in that class, but you have a day where you're saddled with WAY too much work for another class where you're struggling, it's okay to say "okay, today I need to go to sleep by 10pm, I can either finish this difficult homework or complete homework for the class that will drop a grade", sometimes it makes more sense to skip that one homework and get a zero to spend time dedicated to the class you're struggling in and get rest. in a similar vein, there is also a limit to studying - there is a point where you physically cannot absorb more knowledge. it is so much better for your brain - both from a focus and memory standpoint - to get a little extra sleep than to stay up late studying well past the point where you will retain knowledge.

now....again, I havent been applying to colleges in ages so my advice might be a bit stale, but colleges tend to look for good grades but also challenging classes, or improvement over time in classes, etc etc. they want to know you're working hard, and that you have diverse interests. college apps are a bit like resumes honestly, except you cant lie about your GPA. but like. you can fluff everything else. literally EVERYTHING becomes fair game with college apps. you can talk about fanfic or a fandom you're in if you phrase it the right way, like there are barely rules lmao. and you can make yourself sound very appealing

so my advice would be basically this: work hard, but learn your personal limits. figure out how much sleep a night makes you feel awake and focused the next day (again, it varies!) and aim for that as much as you can. try to eat nutritiously when you can, and drink lots of water. dedicate time to your homework and studying, but be sure to take regular breaks and ACTUALLY shift your brain away from your work during those breaks. and it's also good to dedicate time to life activities - like I said, colleges want to know you're a diverse person. spend time in clubs you like or playing sports if that's your thing, or do things unconnected to school. and remember, you can fluff that all up on a college app! but also remember - you have to live with you for the rest of your life, and there are so so many paths to a good job or a college education if that's what you decide you want, be sure to prioritize your health as much as you can. the education system tricks you into this never ending cycle of "if I just push through ___________ I'll get to ___________!" and taking that through your life can be really challenging and exhausting. I need to acknowledge that some of this is easy for me to say - I was a good test taker in high school, I went to college, and I bullshitted my way through (that's a whole other story lmao) but like. I need to acknowledge that, by some privilege and luck, I do have a college education. so when i say this next thing, please take it with a grain of salt, but there is more to life than chasing what society tells us to chase - there is family, there are friends, relationships, hobbies and interests and love and dreams and spending hours playing video games and SLEEP and getting sunburned cause you spent too long out under the sun photosynthesizing and collecting pens or shiny rocks and ANIMALS there is so so so much in life and I hate with such a burning passion that, for the first 22 years of our lives, we are told the ONLY thing in life is getting through college, getting a degree. again, I need to acknowledge that I say that with a background of privilege, and that education can help people get out of bad situations, etc, but there are many paths to education and they dont all require you to put life on hold to get there

let me tell u a story real quick, cause my education looks (from the outside) "easy" (turns out I had depression and eating disorders of all kinds yeehaw !!!!). my sister did NOT have an easy time in school - my parents could afford it, so she had a tutor for some of her challenging subjects, but she also dealt with anxiety and depression the entire time. she didnt get into the college she wanted to, but got put in a sort of program where, if she got good enough grades in some community college courses, she could get into the school. so she worked her ass off, dove even deeper into her mental health issues, but eventually did get in. and then she had challenging classes and didnt have a great support system, and she ended up failing out of many of her classes, to the point where she got put on academic probation. so she took a year off, got a job at a daycare, and I have literally never seen her happier or more well-adjusted. shes going back to school now, for early childhood education, and working part time at the daycare while she takes a light course load at school

another story for you - my aunt graduated high school and went straight into the workforce. she came from a dirt-poor family and couldn't afford it. she bounced around a bit, but eventually found company that she worked well with. they paid for her to go to school, and she finally got a degree many years after what we would consider "traditional". she had a few other jobs, but shes been at her current company now going on 20 years, has been through several promotions, and works directly with a c-suite employee. she is also the only woman in her office, a very traditional trucking company where she works with engineers on a daily basis

there are many paths to education, if that's where you want to go, and it's okay if it ends up looking different from the traditional path were told to follow. do what you can to avoid sacrificing your mental health for an education - if its what you want, you will get there. and remember to ask for help along the way!! I hope that helps a little, dear

[sldneycrosby]

20 Questions Game

tagged by @klenovyy !! thank u !!

they tagged my main blog @jetbycitizen, but im just answering it w my hockey blog bc they’re also a hockey blog and im more active on this one :-).

Nickname:

ok i mean i always go by my nickname penny! my full name is penelope, but literally everyone calls me penny. I don’t mind if u call me penelope, but most ppl just call me by my nickname.

Zodiac sign: i am a stereotypical gemini OOPS

Hogwarts house:

ok omg so this used to be a thing for me in middle school, i’d take the quiz like once every 3 months to see how much i Changed TM (don’t question 13 yr old me, i was a mess). I think im still a ravenclaw, but lemme check rn. update: i am still a ravenclaw. 

Height:

5′6

Last thing I googled:

pottermore hogwarts sorting hat quiz kfneksfnewkf

Fave musicians:

ok SO i could talk abt music ALL day but my favs atm are: citizen (my main url @jetbycitizen means the song jet... by the band ... citizen jndjjndejnwk), the story so far, bay faction, and LANY (im just gonna stop here bc i’ll keep going).

Song stuck in my head:

shower song by fredo disco (theyd probs be one of my fav bands too LMAO) the song will make u sad and then also have a kazoo part, which is all u need from a song tbh. OH and also panini by lil nas x (HEY PANINI DONT U BE A MEANIE)

Followers:

I only have 16 followers OOPS but i lov u all. Im p new and i mean making a hockey blog somewhat near the end of playoffs probably didnt help either LMAO.

Following:

107 blogs

Do you get asks:

Not rly!! I got my first asks yesterday nkwnfnkfn

Amount of sleep:

I have a terrible sleep schedule, but most of the time like 5-6 hrs.

Lucky number:

4!

What are you wearing:

a state champs tour shirt (anyone listen to state champs? They SLAP) and black shorts.

Dream job:

A market analyst for a record company maybe? Or idk in general work in marketing in something im v interested in: hockey, music, movies, etc.

Instruments played:

Literally nothing, I WISH. The extent of my musical talent was being a black belt in recorder karate in fourth grade (does anyone else remember that?) I really wanna learn how to play guitar tho.

Languages spoken:

I am terrible so I’m only fluent in English. I took several yrs of Spanish in school tho but my sophomore yr Spanish teacher scared me for LIFE. I also speak VVVVV little Portuguese bc of my family.

Favourite song:

I could never just choose just one, it’s more like songs that r v important to me atm ! If I had to choose, upside down by the story so far and ribs by lorde.

Random fact:

Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure is my fav movie ever, and as a result my senior quote was “be excellent to each other”.

Aesthetic:

As someone who: goes to record stores, spends way too much time in thrift stores, drinks over-priced organic tea, goes to small shows for bands ppl don’t listen to, and calls too many movies ‘films’, I would say …. painfully self-aware hipster. (not pretentious tho, I promise!!)

Dream trip:

I’ve always wanted to go to the Azores, or islands off the coast of Portugal, bc that’s where my family is from :,). 

tagging some mutuals :-)

 @softhartsy, @djokovics, @stromeuh, @hornqwist if y’all wanna do it, and in general, if anyone wants to do it! tag me :-)!!!! 

[muuunii]

Name / Nickname: brenda

Height: almost 5'2. shut up

Last film I saw: jumanji, i was introducing the movie to my younger cousins and they loved it

Star Sign: scorpio

Favorite musician: dont really have one!! i pay more attention to individual songs than their artists

Song stuck in my head: i got 5 on it because of jordan peele’s “us”

Other blogs: i used to have a sideblog for writing references but i forgot the password and havent touched it in like 3 years. so this is my only blog

Do I get asks: once in a blue moon, but i love getting them. it fills my heart with LIGHT

Blogs following: i actually had to check bc i didnt know but im following about 140 blogs

Wearing: a big ass hoodie and some shorts

Dream trip: disneyworld with my best friend. we’ve been wanting to go together since we were like 15 and we’re going to save up for it in the coming year

Dream job: still dont know im jus out here doing shit (whatever a human resources management degree can get me)

Instruments: used to know how to play the guitar but lost the ability over the years

Languages: english & spanish. well i can speak spanish fluently but im a little rusty with reading/writing it

Favourite food: im a hoe for chicken alfredo

Favorite songs: ICY GRL by saweetie, bounce back by big sean, starlight by jai wolf, cosmic love by florence + the machine, chun-li by nicki minaj, bird by billie marten

Random fact: uhhh i kind of have the best of All Worlds, family-wise. im the oldest of all my siblings and im like their big sister, but i lived away from them for half my life so i was basically an only child for that time, and my aunts were young when i was born so theyve always treated me like a younger sister. idk i just been all over the place

I was tagged by: @aaronsaintjames

im tagging: @owldyke @deadsnapdragon @forlenaluthor if youd like, and anyone else who wants to do it. 💪😔💯

[maureenbrown]

spy au w/ saphael

war with love

so simon is a spy and everything

he gets sent to be roomies with raphael and befriend him

and then to go to a wedding where valentine will be there and take him out

and at first everything is cute! and domestic and fluffy!

like they meet in chapter one and backgrounds are established

and in chapter two they get a little bit more domestic where simon is a night owl and raphael has these late shifts and falls asleep on simon

and then theres a city tour!! and near the end there is this open mic singing thing and so obviously they go bc simon and raphael sings and simon is just w o w

meeting!! raphaels!! friends!! and learning more about the past. and this wanting to learn spanish for raphael and also a fancyish meal

raphael learns that simon is learning spanish and teases him lke a lil loser but is also really happy. then they find vida mia snow and sim gets sad bc he doesnt wanna leave raphael ever

then theres more opening up (via viddia atta girl) and their first kiss and stuff. or maybe that hapens in the last chapter idk. simon also gets a job at a flowers place NERD

he gets flowers for like. everything

they go out shopping and also they go out clubbing and simon gets drunk and he makes out with someone who isnt raphael and has sex by mistake

bc now they’re exclusive and raphael is sosososo upset and that trust is betrayed

and they fight and simon feels like shit and he almost leaves bc valentine isnt worth this pain

but he stays. raphael is worth it. vidia is worth it.

its super awkward tension bt it slowly defuses down and raphael finally is willing to talk

and he forgives simon bc he will always forgive simon

and they fall into a familier patter and simon finally meets raph’s family

and then its the pre wedding days where again flower everywhere and theres a job loss confession on raphael’s behalf poor bby

they get matching outfits and simon is reminded of his mission and so he does it well and thats good

and wedding day huge slurs are also thrown around a possible fight but its all okay.

and then simon finds out raphael is an assassin and his next mark is simon so he runs with vidia.

end of war with love.

relationships with other characters

magnus bane

magnus knows both parties and will not take sides

he consoles raphael and his heart goes out to simon

when raphael decides to leave the orginzation magnus supports him and gives him lita

raphael spends years looking for simon but he never asks magnus bc he would never pressure his friend like that

he also knows about lita and loves her and is like a father to her

lightwood siblings

alec finds out thru magnus and after a while he listens

and he realizes that yeah raphael is a lil shit but hes alsoa good person

not all monsters do terrible things and so he develops a relationship and in actuality he also uses raphael to make sure simon and his family stay safe

eventually izzy finds out bc alec can never keep anything fro her

and izzy and raphael!! have a great friendship!!

they speak spansh to each other and are so comfortable with each other and are so good in fighting and sparring

and its so awkward when simon finds out that they knew this whole time but never said anything

but neither of them would betray the other bc friendship

clace

they never knew about raph

and are super pissed with simon

but they work with him and as time goes on they get a little bit easier with him

mydia

so this is in another universe and like mia and raphael have a pretty damn good relationship

and he tells her and she comforts him when hes at his lowest

she and lydia have a thing and its so secretive no one knows [but raph, and magnus. and simon shh]

and lydia is besties with simon in this universe and kinda found out on accident??

shes a spy ffs she overheard some shit and investigated

it led to a h u g e mydia fight

regardless they made up and they also kinda know the story individually and arent taking sides

they just love both people want want the bet i love them

mia and vidia get along great once the initial shock is over tbqh its awesome

and like mia and lita already besties so its a+

vidia mia rose [backstory]

so saphael fund this poor baby girl all abandoned and obviously took her in

simon wanted to name her after a disney fairy FUCKING NERD but raphael wanted to name her after his sister and so they came to a compromise where her first name would be vidia and her middle name mia after IZZY!! SISTER! OC!!! and her last name snow bc they found her on a bench and she was so delicately wrapped she looked so soft

they took her in and raphael is really good with kids with and simon is so!!

her mother couldnt take care of her she left a note and its so movie-like its almost sounds fake.

since they dont know her birthday they decided it would be on the day they found her.

gay. as. hell.

BIRTHDAY:

FANCAST: zendaya

vidia mia rose [personality]

nicknames include: dia, viddie (it was a dumb nickname by jace bye) and mini mia or mm! by raphael and lita calls her snow (no one else)

shes likes a gryffindor - ravenclaw

like a hanna marin x aria montgomery

shes extremely stubborn in her eays and refuses to back down even if she knows that shes in the wrong

and like really reckless and does dangerous things just for the fun of it

she also would die for her friends and family (she hates that raphael is a part of that)

and like really quick witted which is why she and lita clash so much at first

and shes so lazy but knows randm facts about random things

shes so into history and loves analyzing things bye

shes also really gifted musically wise like she can sing and since simon always sang and played guitar she did too

but there s some raphael in her like she ended up playing piano instead. and like i said really protective and quickwitted

she wants to be remembered for something and wants to do great things but also?? nothing is special about her (or so she thinks)

tales of a fairy;; vidia mia snow

lita aubree snow [backstory]

she was in the system and it sucked

so she ran away and tried to pickpocket magnus bane and obviously failed

but he saw the potential in her and didnt wanna turn her into a spy so he gave her to raphael and she became like his right hand man

shes met all of his family and has trained with him and honestly?? there is no one she trusts more

she doesnt see him as a father figure tho. like a teacher yeah mentor would be the better word

and she thinks that she owes him everything

raphael sees her skill set bc obviously she can thieve p well and he hones in the pick pocketing better. and shes also a grifter

she loves raphael, she loves the family that she found on her own

even tho shes hella insecure about who she is and why her parents dont love her

BIRTHDAY:

FANCAST: janella salvador

lita aubree snow [personality]

nicknames include: lina, las, or any of her other identities, bree (usually raphael only), and when she and vidia are going at it, mine or reeree [aubREE] bc nERDS

shes like raphael and magnus a huffie slytherin

like sophie deveroux but more sarcastic x alison dilaurentis?

shes really patient and can wait to get what she wants. and can enetrain herself for hours/days

shes really charismatic people are just drawn in, and they /want/ to meet her

and thats where her manipulative side comes out like gets people to trust her and then uses it to her advantage

she teases and knows how to use people. shes so cunning and also doesnt know who she is

shes a grifter and has so many facades but who is she really? is she a good person? lita is so insecure about herself and its the worst she gets really bad

shes hardworking and puts her heart and soul into things and also will defend the people she loves

and thats where she and vidia clash so much

shes also really flirtatious (thanks to magnus) and flirts with everyone bc secrets and she likes to hook up

it takes a lot to get her trust and if you break up you done son.

she wants to be someone people whisper about years from now but. is she a good enough person?

pansexual and hooks up with anyone cute

flowers blooming in winter;; lita aubree snow

fairys and flowers destroy each other

battlescars  young god  anything you can do i can do better  give your heart a break  

[jasonblossomsghost]

1-64 and 65: If you were a bird, what kind of bird would you be?

1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you?mm no more my own? i dissociate Constantly

2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you?4 unless i’m w someone else then 1

3. The person you would never want to meet?drumpf

4. What is your favorite word?hmm idk iridocyclitis is fun, a meme, and i work for an eye doctor so relevant to my occupation

5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be?i like weeping willows and i cry a lot so

6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought?we’re really doing this again huh

7. What shirt are you wearing?a long sleeved red and navy striped shirt that my mommy gave me

8. What do you label yourself as?a disaster

9. Bright room or dark room?bright room. fun fact: when i was ab 13 i could not sleep unless my overhead light was on. sometimes if im doing really badly i still need it lmao

10. What were you doing at midnight last night?uhh iirc i was talking to my boyfriend and playing wordscapes

11. Favorite age you’ve been so far?idk 19 is going ok so far

12. Who told you they loved you last?my boyfriend

13. Your worst enemy?either myself or this one coworker of mine who i genuinely hate

14. What is your current desktop picture?just the preset one,,, idc that much lmao

15. Do you like someone?i mean my s/o is pretty cool sometimes

16. The last song you listened to?Outside - The Early November

17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?me bitch tf

18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?that one coworker... this one patient at my job who degrades me and my coworkers constantly

19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do?no one and nothing... i like to do things myself

20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional)idk tbh 

21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do?don’t really like this question or the phrase opposite sex in general  so pass /:

22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it?nah i’m Talentless

23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of?you know overflow drains in like bathtubs? until i was like 10 i had to have my back against them bc i was scared people could watch me through it 

24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal.i live off popcorn so i dont eat or like sandwiches really

25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it?put it in savings. i’m tryna move out in 6 months

26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go?hmm idk. i have a friend in san francisco i havent seen in forever so that would be lit

27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be?smirnoff 100%

28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place? no geminis

29. What is your favorite expletive?fuck

30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno?i was gonna say my fire safe box that has my social security card, birth certificate, etc then i was like wait a minute... but tbh idk maybe my laptop? or my purse?

31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?my childhood was like 98% trauma but like.. it made me not suck that bad so i’ll keep it

32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world!i wanna move to seattle but thats in country so.. no idea. sweden? i like ikea

33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?don’t fuck w the dead. no one is coming back

34. What was your last dream about?last sunday night i dreamt i woke up monday (christmas eve) and didnt go to work even though i was supposed to (paranoia. i had the day off lmao)

35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]?i am very good at loving dogs

36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital?yeah lots of times lmao

37. Have you ever built a snowman?yep. shitty but a snowman

38. What is the color of your socks?black

39. What type of music do you like?depends. sad boi music lately

40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?sunrises 100%

41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor?i can’t drink milk /: but maybe strawberry

42. What football team do you support? (I will answer in terms of American football as well as soccer)i am gay idk sports

43. Do you have any scars?quite a few! i’m a clumsy clusterfuck

44. What do you want to be when you graduate?i’m currently in college for poli sci and after i graduate w my BA, i wanna go to law school

45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?idk?? like i hate myself but i also dont really wanna change anything

46. Are you reliable?generally yes. but i am known to cancel plans bc i’m depressed lol

47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?hows life dude

48. Do you hold grudges?oh hell yeah not gonna play like i dont

49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create?nope dont like that At All

50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had?nothing really stands out... probably something from work but i take 100 calls a day so? they all blur together

51. Are you a good liar?really good. i don’t lie though. i’m actually brutally honest bordering on asshole

52. How long could you go without talking?dayssss i love not speaking

53. What has been you worst haircut/style?uhh freshman year i had an awful side part... next

54. Have you ever baked your own cake?yeah! i’m really great at cooking and baking!

55. Can you do any accents other than your own?not really? i took 2 years french and 4 years spanish and to pronounce properly i have to talk differently so i guess i kinda take on an accent then? but not actually

56. What do you like on your toast?i have celiac and gluten free bread is like $5 i dont eat toast lmao

57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of?i had to do a portrait in the style of francis bacon for my art final

58. What would be you dream car?ideally something that uses clean energy other than that idc

59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain.no and no.. i just shower what y’all doing in the shower

60. Do you believe in aliens?1000000%

61. Do you often read your horoscope?not often.. like if i happen across it i’ll read it

62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet?i’m not sure. m is a nice letter

63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons?dinosaurs bc they were real

64. What do you think about babies?honestly? terrified of them 

65. Freebie! Ask anything interesting you can think of.if i were a bird maybe a magpie? or a crow or raven? or one of those really annoying parakeets

[wlwhyuck]

rules: answer to 30 questions and then tag 20 blogs you’d like to know better

tagged by @cokehei n @dreamutual ily thank u sdjkhfsjk 

nickname: one of my managers at work calls me ‘K’ and my best friend calls me korn flakes, sisi calls me krin when shes in distress lol

gender: nonbinary/agender 

zodiac: capricorn

height: 5′1 (i got measured recently so Ha)

age: 19

time: 10:25am i just woke up lol 

favorite bands/solo artists: nct, bts, brothel., noah, anubis xiii, sg lewis, gallant, honne, oh wonder 

song stuck in my head: needed you by illenium

last movie i saw: i believe it was infinity war 

last thing i googled: 

this is who i am as a person mayhaps ? i only looked up wagyu beef bc i was watching worth it n i wanted 2 see what the cow looked like

other blogs: @stvrlght which is my fashion/personal blog u should check it out hehe and i used to have a bts blog but i deactivated last week lol 

do i get asks: once in a blue moon sdjkfhsd 

why i chose my username: donghyuck is art what Else is there to say

following: 146 

average amount of sleep: depends what time i need to be somewhere the next day tbh ! but average overall is about 7 according to my sleep tracker app

lucky number: i dont really have a lucky number but my favorite numbers are 7 and 17

what i am wearing: a middle school tshirt n some pj shorts im literally in bed

dream job: sfklslfk pls digital media content director for anything from ssense or grailed, or maybe even for balenciaga OR working w archive margiela skjdfnak holy shit

dream trip: japan !! russia !! france !! hong kong !!

favorite food: im a foodie there are Lots...japanese ramen, tapsilog, my grandmas thit kho, mi quang, mac and cheese, fries 

play any instruments: im literally musically talentless it gets more Embarrassing the more i answer this question sfjhs 

favorite song: (of all time) yours by sg lewis, currently it’d be back 2 u by nct 127 <3

play(ed) any sports: i tried out for vb my freshman yr i didnt make it and i havent ran since my last p.e. class like 3 or 4 yrs ago 

hair color: it was black blue but its faded now and become really dark brown i need to redye

eye color: brown

most iconic song: wedding dress by taeyang go ahead n flame me

languages you speak/are learning: i speak english, viet, spanish, im learning mandarin, and i plan learning korean in depth at some point i only know how to read it rn

random fact: i have a bag made out of a gas mask from the 50s and industrial chain and its the Best thing i have ever bought in my goddamn life

describe yourself as aesthetics/things: not being able to find that one black shirt in a sea of many, the sound of draining a cup of milk tea, loud laughter that you can’t help but smile at, the glow of a screen in a dark room, smoke leaving parted lips, the feeling of wanting someone that you can’t have and accepting it, the anticipation of being free 

i tag @lovnct @yuikhei @fulsun @1ongride @haechanciaga @127hearts @cafechenle @myfirstandlast @jxhnnyseo @tae1en @jenology @qianloveclub @hyucko @godoyoung @leejenos @starryjaes @nctdream @jenomutual @jeamins @0mile thats 20 !!

[dykedykegooses]

For the asks: multiples of 3😄

3. are you an auditory, visual, or tactile learner?for most subjects I'm very visual, but I also need to hear people explain it to me if that makes sense? like i cant absorb it just by reading about it but I cant always visualize what people are saying without seeing it at the same time6. how often do you use chapstick?every day! multiple times a day. I'm a lesbian

9. if you could make any job you want, what would it be?it's less about one ideal job I want and more about having the time and energy to dedicate to multiple passions of mine! I wanna be a researcher, a tutor, a psychology conference-goer, a small farmer, a book store owner ... just a lot of avenues!!12. scarf or hat?scarves probably! hats are cool but I'm worried they make my face look round and bare15. do you remember your dreams?not often. in fact, I didnt think I ever dreamt except maybe twice a year bc I never remembered them

18. someone who's changed your life?well I have this philosophy that you're always changing with every interaction so technically everyone, but my research mentor has had a large impact on my in terms of my development as a better student and researcher, and introducing me to what I want to research for the rest of my life?21. why do you like _ (your choice)?I like baking! and cooking in general, but baking bread especially is really relaxing and you get to experiment with different flavors and at the end of all your work and patience u get homemade bread!! nothin better than that24. are you religious?no. not really spiritual either? I cant put my thoughts on Higher Powers into words without sounding like a bit of a nihilistic asshole which is not Really it but u kno

27. favorite boardgame?I enjoy chess even tho I'm bad at it, and I also like stratego? but it's been a while since I've played it lmao30. telekinesis or telepathy?probably telekinesis? it's just cooler lol. unless being discovered/exposed/whatever is a threat, then telepathy

33. what's something that no one on tumblr knows about you?that's hard! some of my best friends here know everything about me basically, and I overshare constantly. hm! well, I'm moderately asthmatic, such that exercising (or even standing) for too long will throw me into an asthma attack (and one time that got so bad that, coupled with probable dehydration and anemia, caused me to pass out and throw up while unconscious lol?)36. how long have you had your most recent blog?that's probably my Spanish studyblr blog, and only since aprilish if I remember correctly!39. have you ever dated?yes, I have 1 ex gf and I'm dating my wonderful gf of 6 months now!!

42. do you have any siblings?yes, I have one (1) asshole younger brother

45. weirdest thing you own?hm. I have a genie lamp that my babysitter gave me in kindergarten? or a sign that looks like a Wonka chocolate bar??48. favorite picture of you or that someone else has taken of you?51. how many languages are you fluent in?1.5! I can get by in most situations in Spanish, and ofc I'm fluent in English54. favorite word?in Spanish, I remember when I went to costa Rica and I saw a sign that said 'burbujita' which i believe is like "little bubbler" or maybe "little bubble witch", I'm not positive, but I always thought that was really cute :) in English, anything that sounds a little silly. I used to hate it, but now I really like the word tummy

57. one thing you wish never existed?hot dogs60. favorite story you read as a kid? percy jackson!63. long or short nails?I like the way (some) long nails look, but I have such an issue with the way my nails feel that I have to keep them short (by biting them :( the clippers on my finger nails actually make my skin crawl)

66. fruits or vegetables?bro I love me some veggies. fruits are almost a dessert u know like u can only have so many. u can never have 2 many vegetables69. do you like public speaking?I would like to meet the lucky fucker who says yes to this honestly? I prepared a 9 minute speech and practiced it for almost a week and when I got up there I sped through the whole thing in just over 7Peyton72. favorite thing about your personality?I'm pretty funny (to me anyway) and I'm very loyal until you do something really really fucked up (and even then I'll still feel bad about not talking anymore)75. have you ever been to disneyland?no but I've been to disneyworld! it was only okay. not worth all the money imo78. favorite extracirricular class you've taken?well I study Spanish in my off time bc that's pretty cool, but i honestly dont think I've ever taken a non-required class just bc I wanted to

81. worst memory involving someone else?um. almost all of them lmao I look back at every social interaction I've ever had and cringe84. what natural disaster are you most afraid of?fire probably?? or an earthquake?? or both like a fuckin volcanic eruption???87. mansion or penthouse?manion fs

90. do you keep letters or holiday cards?I keep handwritten letters!! my mom keeps holiday cards, but I dont really care that much about those93. what genre do you like most?horror! whether its movies, shows, video games, whatever! love me some horror stuff :)96. first word that comes to your mind?burgle :o

[hiccps]

hey guys, im syre n im 21 from australia rip which is why i am here so late bc my ass just woke up (lets ignore the fact its 3pm) anyways this is the first time i’ve rped in a while so im rly excited n u know i love rps that arent set in the u.s so im super hype for this. this is very long n a real Mess so pls hit me up for connections, this poor child needs a good bff bc their life has gone 2 shitz n also come b my friend my discord is syre#9813

[ JOSEPHINE SKRIVER ] — oh SHE/THEY ?? that’s just LUNA ROMERO, the TWENTY THREE year old GENDERFLUID that just graduated from nyu with a degree in CHEMICAL AND BIOMOLECULAR ENGINEERING. around campus, they were known as the QUIXOTIC, probably because they were really LOYAL, and also pretty IDEALISTIC but they’re actually a lot more than that. they’re coming to curacao in hopes to LIVE LIFE ONE LAST TIME. i wonder if they’ll accomplish it before they leave. 

death tw, shooting tw, depression tw, suicide attempt tw

serafina alegría lucia romero de luca born in rosario argentina

she was raised by her uncle who was only 18 at the time she was born and her grandmother

her uncle called her luna as a nickname because he said she was born on a full moon n she always lit up like one whenever she saw him

her father, who was only barely 22 was always away working to provide for her and her brother and rarely had time off to see them since he was working at the mines

her mother ran off when she was quite young, she can barely remember her face but her uncle says that her mother ran off to study in the U.S since she had her when she was 19 and her brother when she was 16

when she was about 7 years old her grandma had moved to the U.S permanently so she was raised just by her uncle who eventually moved her and her older brother cesar to new york when she was 10 years old

they lived in jackson heights since there was a lot of argentines there

up until she was like 13 she could only speak spanish but her uncle made sure that she studied and did her homework and he made sure that she spoke english to her brother and all her friends and only spoke spanish to him and her grandma

as she got older, around the age of 10-15 he had to work a lot more and she relied on her older brother more often

she used to follow cesar around and played soccer on the streets and followed after his friends

she was a “tomboy” and often referred to herself as a boy as well

but she also loved cooking with her grandma and said she was a girl whenever she was cooking

her brother used to tease her but she always responded that she can be both a girl and a boy n he never really argued with her

soccer was something she genuinely loved and she was also always good at math since it was the same when she was at school in argentina

n she missed argentina a lot so playing soccer in the streets with her brother reminded her of playing soccer in the streets in rosario

*shooting tw, death tw: when she was about seventeen, she was being walked home by her brother from school, they had gotten caught in a crossfire of a drive by shooting

her brother had pushed her to the ground to protect her and had gotten shot in the process and eventually died of his wounds

she was really broken from his death n felt like she didnt know who she was since she lost a huge part of herself

she fell into a deep depression n never really properly grieved his death

she lots someone who protected her and her uncle was still away for work

she pushed her grandma away and secluded herself from everyone else n she even deferred her first year of university

she felt like her brother and uncle abandoned her and she wanted to rebel so her uncle would come back

she wanted him to visit her n stay n look after her

she started going out to parties and skipping church which shocked her deeply religious, catholic grandmother

she was getting high, neglecting football and sleeping around

there were days where she didnt come home at all n eventually her grandma told her uncle who ended up moving back in to deal with her

he understood what she was doing n he promised that he wasnt going anywhere as long as she got her life back on track

but they still found it hard to address the fact she was depressed n would go days just staying in bed sleeping

both her grandma and uncle didnt want to admit that she had depression

she struggled with it throughout her university years on top of the burden of studying as well as not dealing with her brothers death

SUICIDE TW** she did try to take her life when she was 22 coming up to the anniversary of her brothers death but her uncle found her n rushed her to the hospital

from that day he tried to educate himself on depression n was always looking at different ways for her to cope n even took her to a psychologist

he put all his attention on her mental and physical health n was always worried about keeping her alone

which is why he was slightly hesitant but still overall supportive abt her going to curacao. he did suggest that he come with her smh so that they’d go to argentina at the end of the trip to visit her dad

but yeah thats all i have for her

PERSONALITY + FUN FACTS

shes very open about things that dont have to do with her brothers death like family life, where her parents are, genderfluidity, sex life, love life, soccer, body you name it, her depression but not where it stems from

she plays the piano!! her fave piece is kiss the rain by yiruma

super idealistic n it was also ingrained by her uncle?? she used to always say she wanted to marry her uncle n he always reinforced it like no one is ever going to love her like he does n if inevitably, someone does pique her interest she has to promise that she wont settle for anything less than the best n shes gna be with someone who loves her almost as much as he loves her

she wants to pursue soccer professionally n play for argentina’s womens football team!!

up until her brothers death, only a few people called her luna n her grandma still refers to her as serafina but after his death she only went by luna

she comes from a deeply religious catholic background btu shes more spiritual n only goes to church to appease her grandma

idolises lionel messi, a true argentine treasure

her great grandparents from her dads side moved to argentina from spain n her grandparents from her mums side moved to argentina from italy

she is left handed n left footed

her position is right wing n considers herself 2 be a playmaker

huge nail biter

identifies as panromantic pansexual

she can speak 3 languages, english, spanish n portuguese

loves to dance, gets real rowdy

huge drinker, can knock down 5 shots just for pregaming

adopted a cute lil chow chow named brutus in honour of her brother

aesthetics: hiccups, nipple piercings, canola fields, drinking cold water on a hot day, tripping on a flat surface

yall know my dude is supporting argentina for the wc

huge fc barcelona fan (has nothign to do with messi)(it has everything to do with messi but lets not get into it)

loves the beach n water in general

also loves full moons

swears like a sailor

loves seafood, allergic to prawns though

her favourite romance movies are before sunset, eternal sunshine of a spotless mind, when harry met sally & pretty woman

that being said she feels like she n clementine kruczynski are the same person

wanted connections: 

best friend: they were best friends as kids and maybe dabbled into feelings but decided ultimately they’d stay as best friends [ alvaro ]

best friend 2: basically ride or die, fuck shit up together, cry over shit together, fight people for each other [ evie ]

best friend 3: 

roommate: [ isa ]

ride or die: [ cindy ]

frenemies

love n hate banter relationship: [ ingrid ]

ex gf/bf/partner: 

ex bestie

neighbour??

dorm room roomie

[catncake]

So idk why im making this a tumblr podt instead of actually discussing this w my friends/therapist BUT

I think i have legitimate trauma abt the time i was an exchange student in japan

Ive started watching anime and tried to study japaneses again abt 3 times after i came back and it always comes to a point where, bc im having more contact w the lamguage, i start thinking in japanese. But then i also start remembering things ive done there, and things ive felt. And its unbearable. Its like those memories were buried, and digging them up hurts.

I start remembering the time i tried sharing smth i had made ij the cooking class w one of my classmates but it fell on the floor. So after a while threw it away bc it had fallen, but idk i think i made too much of a spectacle or too much noise and i felt like everyones eyes were on me. And like they didnt know it had fallen, so i was just throwing good food away yo them? And they looked so perturbed!! I felt so judged

Idk i cant even remember the friends i had there (and i didnt have many). I can only think of the horrible times my 2nd host family put me through, how i didnt have any support, how even the other exchange students didnt like me, how fucked it was that i was trying to understand and speak abt my gender identity in a totally different language that i didnt know. How scary it was to not be able to communicate well. How lonely i felt. Even talking to my brazillian friend everyday slips my mind sometimes. But i did that! Everyday for a year we sent messages and it was a life saver.

There was also the time i was on vacation from school and with my 2nd family. I had no plans and nothing to do and i ended up just masturbating a lot. It felt terrible. I was so scared of that family's mom. I liked the dad, but it felt like he had agreed to take me in without even consulting the rest of the family. He was nice and we would go out on weekends which was great. But i knew the others didnt like me. And i became a vegetarian at that time and they didnt make special food for me so i wasnt eating well. And i felt very uncared for. I know i wasnt the best kid at that time, and i was really unprepared to be there. But i want to forgive myself bc i was 15, and i was sad and lonely and scared. I didnt know so much and i just needed someone to take care of me. And the people who were supposed to didnt. Im sceptical of blaming them bc obviously japanese people have a different culture and 15yo there are a lot more independent than i was i think, but idk. If they were taking in an exchange student they should think there would be differences.

And it sucks that i get stuck on those bad memories and i forget the good ones too.

Like my first family was p neutral, but they took care of me, and i didnt know much japanese in the beggining so i feel like they rlly did their best. The 3rd one was also so caring. They cared that i didnt eat meat and they cared that i liked videogames and iceskating. I liked them. They wanted me to meet the rest of the family.

And right as i was getting more used to it, i had made japanese friends from my class and we went out and had fun, i knew how to say the things i meant, and i had to LEAVE!!! That sucked the most. I was just feeling comfortable and i had to back and do it all again. Get used to being in brazil again, and caring abt school again. And i had to deal w telling my parents i was nb, i thought i could talk to them bc no one in japan would even look me in the eye at times, but they still didnt take it well. It was SO much.

And i wish i could study japanese and do this things again bc its a great language and it brings me a lot of joy. But i have to deal w all these very old bad feelings too. Im calling this trauma bc it feels recurring and like theres a block in my mind. Like a wall that stops me from me going forward and acessing these memories without breaking down crying.

A recent one that just resurfaced is one that my 1st host parents were going to play golf and i asked of i could go and they said no bc it could be dangerous. And idk i feel like that was a mark for me. Me extending and trying to be included only to be shut down or denied. Thats were the loneliness came from i suppose. Theres also the summer camp we did w the other exchange students and how i feigned a crush on the spanish guy. He tried to kiss me and i didnt want to. It was so hard to understand what i was feeling. And i didnt want to disappoint everyone elses expectation of me. I was just 15.

Idk im glad im back in brazil with the friends i love and with whom i can communicate well. I wish i keep studying and learning japanese and that ill also make new friends through this language.

Anyway, ill make some pasta for dinner now.