#who certainly has no motivation to reveal the truth

[book--brackets]

Summaries under the cut

Heist Society by Ally Carter

When Katarina Bishop was three, her parents took her on a trip to the Louvre…to case it. For her seventh birthday, Katarina and her Uncle Eddie traveled to Austria…to steal the crown jewels. When Kat turned fifteen, she planned a con of her own—scamming her way into the best boarding school in the country, determined to leave the family business behind. Unfortunately, leaving “the life” for a normal life proves harder than she’d expected.

Soon, Kat's friend and former co-conspirator, Hale, appears out of nowhere to bring Kat back into the world she tried so hard to escape. But he has a good reason: a powerful mobster has been robbed of his priceless art collection and wants to retrieve it. Only a master thief could have pulled this job, and Kat's father isn't just on the suspect list, he is the list. Caught between Interpol and a far more deadly enemy, Kat’s dad needs her help.

For Kat, there is only one solution: track down the paintings and steal them back. So what if it's a spectacularly impossible job? She's got two weeks, a teenage crew, and hopefully just enough talent to pull off the biggest heist in her family's history--and, with any luck, steal her life back along the way.

Amulet by Kazu Kibuishi

After the tragic death of their father, Emily and Navin move with their mother to the home of her deceased great-grandfather, but the strange house proves to be dangerous. Before long, a sinister creature lures the kids' mom through a door in the basement. Em and Navin, desperate not to lose her, follow her into an underground world inhabited by demons, robots, and talking animals.

Eventually, they enlist the help of a small mechanical rabbit named Miskit. Together with Miskit, they face the most terrifying monster of all, and Em finally has the chance to save someone she loves.

The War That Saved My Life by Kimberly Brubaker Bradley

Ten-year-old Ada has never left her one-room apartment. Her mother is too humiliated by Ada’s twisted foot to let her outside. So when her little brother Jamie is shipped out of London to escape the war, Ada doesn’t waste a minute—she sneaks out to join him.   So begins a new adventure of Ada, and for Susan Smith, the woman who is forced to take the two kids in. As Ada teaches herself to ride a pony, learns to read, and watches for German spies, she begins to trust Susan—and Susan begins to love Ada and Jamie. But in the end, will their bond be enough to hold them together through wartime? Or will Ada and her brother fall back into the cruel hands of their mother?

Ascendance by Jennifer Nielsen

In a discontent kingdom, civil war is brewing. To unify the divided people, Conner, a nobleman of the court, devises a cunning plan to find an impersonator of the king's long-lost son and install him as a puppet prince. Four orphans are recruited to compete for the role, including a defiant boy named Sage. Sage knows that Conner's motives are more than questionable, yet his life balances on a sword's point—he must be chosen to play the prince or he will certainly be killed. But Sage's rivals have their own agendas as well.

As Sage moves from a rundown orphanage to Conner's sumptuous palace, layer upon layer of treachery and deceit unfold, until finally, a truth is revealed that, in the end, may very well prove more dangerous than all of the lies taken together.

The True Confessions of Charlotte Doyle by Avi

An ocean voyage of unimaginable consequences... Not every thirteen-year-old girl is accused of murder, brought to trial, and found guilty. But I was just such a girl, and my story is worth relating even if it did happen years ago. Be warned, however: If strong ideas and action offend you, read no more. Find another companion to share your idle hours. For my part I intend to tell the truth as I lived it.

The Girl Who Drank the Moon by Kelly Barnhill

Every year, the people of the Protectorate leave a baby as an offering to the witch who lives in the forest. They hope this sacrifice will keep her from terrorizing their town. But the witch in the forest, Xan, is kind and gentle. She shares her home with a wise Swamp Monster named Glerk and a Perfectly Tiny Dragon, Fyrian. Xan rescues the abandoned children and deliver them to welcoming families on the other side of the forest, nourishing the babies with starlight on the journey. 

One year, Xan accidentally feeds a baby moonlight instead of starlight, filling the ordinary child with extraordinary magic. Xan decides she must raise this enmagicked girl, whom she calls Luna, as her own. To keep young Luna safe from her own unwieldy power, Xan locks her magic deep inside her. When Luna approaches her thirteenth birthday, her magic begins to emerge on schedule--but Xan is far away. Meanwhile, a young man from the Protectorate is determined to free his people by killing the witch. Soon, it is up to Luna to protect those who have protected her--even if it means the end of the loving, safe world she’s always known.

Pollyanna by Eleanor H. Porter

When orphaned, eleven-year-old Pollyanna comes to live with austere and wealthy Aunt Polly, her philosophy of gladness brings happiness to her aunt and other unhappy members of the community.

Paddington Bear by Michael Bond

Mr. and Mrs. Brown first met Paddington, a most endearing bear from Darkest Peru on a railway platform in London. A sign hanging around his neck said, "Please look after this bear. Thank you" So that is just what they did.

From the very first night when he attempted his first bath and ended up nearly flooding the house, Paddington was seldom far from imminent disaster. Jonathan and Judy were delighted with this havoc and even Mr. and Mrs. Brown had to admit that life seemed to be more filled with adventure when there was a bear in the house.

Dragon Rider by Cornelia Funke

A dragon. A boy. A journey. Firedrake, a brave young dragon, his loyal brownie friend Sorrel and a lonely boy called Ben are united as if by destiny. Together, they embark on a magical journey to find the legendary place where silver dragons can live in peace for ever. With only a curious map and the whispered memories of an old dragon to guide them, they fly across moonlit lands and seas to reach the highest mountains in the world. Along the way, they discover extraordinary new friends in unlikely places and a courage they never knew they had. Just as well, for the greatest enemy of all is never far behind them - a heartless monster from the past who's been waiting a very long time to destroy the last dragons on earth.

Wings by Aprilynne Pike

Laurel was mesmerized, staring at the pale things with wide eyes. They were terrifyingly beautiful—too beautiful for words.

Laurel turned to the mirror again, her eyes on the hovering petals that floated beside her head. They looked almost like wings.

[shallowseeker]

OKAY HERE WE GO

In a season that heavily hangs with issues of power dynamics and class, Sam meets his match in Rowena, and he immediately enters into a power struggle with her.

In his dogged pursuit TO FIX THE THING, Sam is becom like Magnus, like Mr. Cuthbert. In his trying to tame Rowena this season, he becomes the most MEN OF LETTERS he have ever seen him:

The Men of Letters is the masculine-stereotyped "Warlock," the match to the often feminine-stereotyped Witch.

They hoard knowledge and manipulate others to do their dirty work. (Importantly: Because they've been hurt, and because they're afraid.)

We think back to the line in Paint it Black:

OLIVETTE: Hoarding unbelievable power for their own amusement. Smug, self-righteous bastards. The Men of Letters. ... ROWENA: I see the truth, and it’s pathetic. You let these Men Of Letters pillage the greatest trove of magical secrets in the world and did nothing.

///

We see in The Werther Project what happens when a MoL goes "bad:"

///

A Man of Letters isn't just a class divide here; it's set up to be Rowena's natural enemy.

The MAN OF LETTERS one of Rowena's symbolic bulls. Sam is a "bull" to her flaming "matador."

But when faced with him, Rowena doesn't know quite what she wants to do. Kill the bull? Subdue the bull?

Ride the bull?

///

Rowena can't help but be intrigued.

And ah, look. It's the symbolic family diner... They are flanked by checkerboards, not dartboards. For better or worse, The family diner is the Family Diner for a reason. I think it's notable that they're meeting here and not there. (You'd expect them to meet in a more neutral SPN space, like *bar/Roadhouse of Good Pals.")

Anyhoo, immediately we see that Sam doesn't balk at Rowena's monstrosity. He isn't even taken aback by her darkest of motivations/emotions:

She certainly looks taken aback.

When she looks at him, she sees an ugliness.

(Crucially, it is what DRIVES this ugliness that will really wind up drawing her closer to Sam in the end).

///

For now, they start trying to impress each other with their brains.

Her initial instinct is to flutter and try to impress him.

///

When she reveals she can't read the book in its present form without a codex, Sam immediately starts his power play, shutting the book.

This forces her to parry, and parry she does!

Flawlessly:

ROWENA: "You're desperate. You can stop pretending you're not."

As they talk business, both of their eyebrows rise, interested despite trying not to be:

*eyebrow raise*

///

She talks of a witch who was victimized, Nadya:

And this further underlines what will become their power struggle. Sam will become his worst self, putting the boot on her neck, becoming the worst kind of MAN OF LETTERS.

///

Later, Sam calls her, and she can't help it, but she's excited. She's quick to match brains with him, and what leaks out?

Her desperate need for friends that challenge her.

And he's intrigued, too, but the lure of their mutual dark ambition.

"Great. Thanks."

Sensing a GOODBYE, Rowena is startled to discover that she doesn't want him to hang up. (Rowena is, at heart, a loser who has to struggle making friends.)

She stammers, then she practically engages in a bit of HAIR TWIRLING HERE:

He shuts her down: "I'll take my chances."

She scoffs, disappointed.

///

Ultimately, she can't resist trying to goad and challenge Sam—to "Toro, Toro" him and try to tame what he represents.

We see Crowley do this, too. His play is to goad and mouth off, especially when he's bitten off more than he can chew and is trying to convince everyone that he's "the top in the relationship."

///

As for the rest of the episodes...

Sam's subconscious knows that witchcraft can be incredibly evil, but he can't help want to strive for ambition, for power, for hidden knowledge, for EVERYTHING. Sam is like a Solomonari in this way. The SCHOLOMONAR. (Tradition says they became the Devil's students, either being instructed by him, or becoming a servant to his commands It's actually a bit different when you get deeper,but that's at least the Westernized version of it.)

As Dean longs for a "simple" world of 24/7-360 total war where he does warfare "all he's good for" without consequence, Sam longs for a world where he can think and strive to achieve ANYTHING without consequence.

A world where Sam can admire Rowena's and Mr. Cuthbert's brains without feeling guilty:

ROWENA (figment): "I know what I'd said about your kind (Men of Letters), but oh. The man who came up with this? The craftsmanship of the box, the sadism of the spellwork... It's all so... deliciously baroque."

There is a direct line being drawn between Sam... and Magnus. (And Rowena, tangentially.)

In Sam's mindscape, he gets to do what he feels he is good for: the pursuit of knowledge. Dean is the ultimate soldier without the need for decision-making, and Sam wants to be the ultimate librarian without consequence.

With that in mind, he also wants to impress Rowena, to impress someone who's brain he found impressive:

He wants to crack a code with her. Together. To show her that he knows things, can figure out things.

But he's also in a (sexual) power struggle with her. Thus, the need for witch-killing bullets... and to see her in chains.

[forasecondtherewedwon]

It's Enough, It's Enough - final chapter

Fandom: My Lady Jane Pairing: Jane x Guildford Rating: E Chapter: 6 / 6

Summary: Five times Jane and Guildford pretend to have sex, and one time it’s for real.

read on tumblr: one | two | three | four | five

It isn’t the sex that makes them different. In Guildford’s opinion, it’s everything after. It’s walking into her chambers as she’s getting ready and witnessing her before the mirror—she is gilded, dazzling—and feeling as if he’s seeing the sun with human eyes for the first time in many, many years. It’s that she notices the moment he enters the room. It’s the high, sweet “Hi” in response to his greeting that is at once perfectly innocent and all-knowing. She’s a kind of god to him, Jane. Does she know? Can she feel him gazing wonderingly up at her from his knees, even while they stand?

His hands squeeze around the shape of the gift he brought her, pearls pressing his palms. The fact of their arranged marriage was probably supposed to be the main exchange between them, since his family’s not actually rich and Jane has (rightly, in his opinion) refused to elevate him above Consort. It gives Guildford a particular pleasure to offer something so small, and valuable primarily for sentimental reasons. There’s no motive behind the gift, no expectation, no trade, no angle. There’s only this difference between them, a new closeness he didn’t see coming. It makes him silly and soft and achingly desperate to woo her—the woman who’s already his wife.

He’s had the earrings for years, kept them safe from the items his father has spoiled and sold. They’ve sat in a small box. Because of this, Guildford remembered the pearls as somewhat dull, but when he thought of them for Jane, when he retrieved them, he discovered he’d been utterly wrong. When he opens his hands to reveal them to Jane, the pearls look as they did to him earlier. They are unlike diamonds or jewels, their milkiness blurring the glow of the candles rather than brilliantly scattering it. It’s as though the pearls capture the light, allowing Guildford to offer this too to Jane: the intangible, the ephemeral. After the way she made him feel in the stables last night, it seems appropriate.

The thing is that Guildford believed he knew all the selves he could be. He knew the one he hates and avoids until dawn forces it upon him, and he knew the mordant and tetchy self prone to habitual drunkenness. The truth is he believed the whole of himself ugly, in one way and another. He thought his past had disfigured any genuine goodness in him beyond recognition or repair. He thought there was no longer anything more to see, and certainly nothing to want, and certainly nothing to love.

Jane loves him.

He has a self that can be loved.

And when he’s complete, it will be as that self. When Jane finds the cure to the intolerability he can’t control, he’ll cure the rest himself, and no longer be sarcastic and chippy and bad-mannered and wine-soaked. He’ll be free of the ugliness piled atop ugliness. It will be like being born a second time. Carefully, Guildford slips the earrings into Jane’s ears. They suit her. As they suited his mother.

He's never felt prouder and braver than he does entering her coronation banquet by her side. Someone rains white rose petals down upon them, upon her, and her eyes lift, full of gentle awe. Should he tell her who is responsible for this detail? That it wasn’t her mother or sisters or a member of the palace staff? That he saw the roses in the garden himself on his way up from the stables this evening. He’s seen them before, but tonight, with the equally white pearls tucked in his fist, Guildford came to a full stop and stared at them. He walked inside and told someone, “Queen Jane has to have rose petals. They will delight her.” It delights him that they do, that it worked, that he has already made her happy twice tonight—the pearls and the roses.

It's fortunate that there’s so much at the banquet to distract him from thoughts of showering Jane in rose petals while she lies in his bed. Otherwise, Guildford might kidnap the Queen from her own celebration and try out those fantasies immediately. As it is, he only manages to keep his eyes off her for a minute at a time at most before casting his gaze about the room to locate her. The dignitaries probably find him rude, the nobles a bore. The Ethians, if they knew he was one of them, would likely make jokes about a tamed animal in their midst. His best chance at not appearing a complete, full-time fool for his wife is to enter into a conversation that actually engages him. He knows who he needs to talk to.

“Anyone made an attempt on your life lately?” Susannah inquires dryly when he finds her by the wall.

“Good evening,” he replies, as though she said something normal and polite. “Welcome. It’s a pleasure to see you again.”

“Oh, was I meant to do that part first? The lying bit?”

Guildford sighs while Susannah watches him with sharp eyes.

“It’s court,” he says. “The lying bit’s the whole bit.” He frowns. “But I wasn’t lying. It is good to see you, Susannah.”

She lifts her eyebrows in obvious incredulity.

“You know what, Guildford? It’s good to see you too. Good to see you not pointing a knife at me like you were the last time we met.”

He scoffs.

“That was only at the beginning.”

“Well, excuse me. That was the part that made an impression.” She gives him a sideways look like she’s sizing him up. “Even if I doubt you coulda done much with it.”

“I’ll have you know I—”

“Have you ever bested Jane with a blade? Talk to me when you’ve bested Jane.”

Guildford sulks. She didn’t even give him a chance to answer. Even if her assumption is correct. Then again, Susannah doesn’t know that Jane fights dirty—though Guildford doesn’t plan to share how every thought fled his mind the moment Jane pinned him beneath her on the forest floor, her warm weight astride his hips, the steel of his own knife scraping along hers as she brought them both to his throat. He probably shouldn’t savour the memory of his defeat this much, but he does.

“You’re inviting me to talk to you again?” Guildford questions wryly. “I thought you were rather unsure of me.”

Susannah shrugs and says, “Jane seems happy,” as though in explanation. It’s a good one, as far as Guildford is concerned. “As happy as she can be with the world on her shoulders.”

“Not the world. Just England. Well, and Ireland, but—”

Her warning look makes Guildford swallow back the dismissive remark he was about to make about the country which, yes, judging by her accent, is the one from which Susannah hails. Oops.

“As I was sayin’,” Susannah continues, “I’d talk to you again because my friend’s happy, and because I’m somehow standin’ in this room. You didn’t try to talk her out of invitin’ Ethians?”

“No.”

“Even though I tricked her and got a load of your silver candlesticks?”

Guildford doesn’t love being reminded of that, but he can tell Susannah’s just testing him, seeing if she can provoke him. It won’t work. Guildford happens to be pretty happy too.

“I admire her,” he says plainly. Not I helped her or even I agree with her, but his words are still the truth. He wants to live the way he chooses and believes others should be allowed to do the same, even if he can’t understand how they embrace what he can’t bear.

“So do I,” Susannah affirms. There isn’t the smallest hint of teasing confrontation in her tone now.

They were so sincere that it begins to grow awkward. He should circulate, speak with other guests, but he can’t abruptly abandon Susannah to do that. He came over to her in the first place because he wanted to better their relationship. If he leaves her, it isn’t like she can easily find someone else to talk to; there’s plenty of prejudice in this room. Plenty of it lives inside Guildford’s own ribcage, but it stays there, turned inward. Anyway, it’s muted just now, thanks to Jane and the hope she gives him. Hey! Maybe he could catch Jane’s eye and bring her over here. That’ll give Susannah someone else to talk to, and Guildford can be near his wife. Possibly place his hand on her back or twine his fingers through hers.

“Could’ve given the wine dispensers a bit more thought,” Susannah observes.

Guildford’s prepared to be grateful for anything she says to break the silence, but as he follows her gaze to the wine dispensers in question, he realizes she’s swung away from earnestness and back to humour—and this time, not at his expense.

Red wine flows from golden spouts in the shape of lion heads. The longer Guildford watches the liquid pour from their mouths, the more he finds himself agreeing with Susannah’s assessment.

“It does sort of look like blood,” he admits.

“Blood streaming from the mouth of an animal. Not the most sensitive touch when you’ve got Ethian guests.”

“I’ve no idea whose idea that was.”

“Is it meant to be literal, do you think?” Susannah wonders. They both tilt their heads as they consider the lions. “You know, a blatant ‘death to Ethians’ message? Or is it more symbolic, with the lion representing England?”

“And Ireland,” Guildford adds to be facetious.

Susannah glances at him.

“You little shite.”

But he turns to her and sees she’s smiling.

Just as he feels they’re really beginning to get along, some asshole who thinks they’re somebody interrupts them, demanding his attention, expecting him to throw over the Ethian who’s monopolizing his time without a second thought. Guildford’s annoyed enough at being cornered that he’s about to correct the intruder’s assumption, but Susannah slips away before he can waylay her.

Guildford does his best First Husband after that, smiling and shaking hands as he navigates the room. He isn’t especially keen to speak with any of the other Ethians, until he starts to think about it, how this might be his chance to help Jane help him. Asking one of them about a cure directly should save his wife some time, surely. A quick, simple conversation instead of hours pouring over a text requiring scrutiny and translation. At last, he can contribute. It will no longer be the project he tricked her into, that he foisted upon her when they married. They can do this together.

Only it doesn’t go as he hopes. Asking after a cure insults the Ethians, and Guildford extracts himself awkwardly. Saying the wrong thing isn’t just uncomfortable—it might have political ramifications. But maybe they were just fucking with him, like the redheaded man implied. Guildford isn’t impressed by the thought, but he’s ready to look the idiot in order to preserve calm at the banquet. It could be that the Ethians he spoke to were uncommonly sensitive, or uncommonly uncouth. He could ask someone else. He could ask their leader, Archer, if he knows of a cure. Guildford is not yet out of options.

He’s deciding when to approach Archer, how exactly to ask this time, when Jane surprises him, leading him from the room. He watches her earrings swing, the pearls silken in the light.

—

The hurt is enormous. It’s as if a void as deep and dark as the night sky above them is opening in Guildford’s chest. Not even opening: reopening. A sewn-up wound is unstitched.

She just told him there is no cure.

Being near Jane is impossible. Staying is impossible. She wasn’t supposed to hurt him. Not her, not now that he loves her and made love to her. It’s almost religious, the fervour in her face when she speaks of healing England. Guildford shouts at her, and it rips the look from her features as if she wore a mask. But it’s himself he feels he’s exposed—himself, ugly and frightened and alone.

They stand beneath the lattice, down below the courtyard where the guests who’ve spilled out of the banquet stroll and converse. For a moment, he watches their legs. And then he goes.

He can hardly tell he’s moving except Jane’s voice is getting more frantic, calling his name. All he wants is to break into a run. The fire flares up in one of the braziers lining the walkway, and he experiences a second flash, inside his mind: he imagines being a horse, how much more swiftly he could flee. Guildford grits his teeth and tries to shake off the impulse, but it only makes him think of gnashing a bit and tossing his mane. His behaviour suddenly seems so equine to him that he starts to panic, terrified that the other self will invade and his humanity will be lost. He’ll be gone, down this path, galloping alongside this stone wall until he outstrips it and races into the darkness, and Jane will be here, still calling his name.

Guildford stops because it feels worse to leave her. He’s furious with her—or maybe just with himself for his failings. For being one of Jane’s.

He doesn’t turn, but she catches up; in her beautiful gown with her twinkling Medici collar, the crafted crown atop her head spired like a cathedral. She is delicately and powerfully adorned, and Guildford was hoping this night would end with the chance to undo it all. There’s an itch that makes his fingers curl in towards his palms, an itch to take her all apart again, piece by piece, lay every golden thing by and hold her in his arms like he did last night. Just last night. When they believed in one another.

He glances briefly at her face.

“Are you crying because you’re sorry, or only because you’re worried I’ll ruin your party?” he asks cruelly. Hating himself, hating himself, loving her.

Jane doesn’t try to stop the tears, to brush them into her eyes, to roll that which rolls down back up again like a length of carpet. She just cries in silence. He feels as if she cries for them both; somehow, his heart breaks, but it’s her eyes that overflow.

“There’s nothing I can do,” she says despairingly, her voice thick and wet. “I can read books about natural philosophy, but I can’t change how the world works. I can no more prevent metamorphosis than I can walk to the sun! It’s—”

“That’s enough,” he interrupts. He doesn’t let himself speak as loudly as he did before—there are people, just up there, enjoying the courtyard—but his tone is colder than any he’s ever used with her.

Before they can figure out what more to say to each other, if there are any words for this in any language, they hear their names from above. The guests are speculating about what Queen Jane and Lord Guildford Dudley are doing down there by themselves. They must have heard raised voices before Guildford mastered himself and spoke more softly. At least their eavesdropping hasn’t been overly successful. It can’t have been, or they’d know he’s Ethian and it’d be guards shouting their names, not merely speaking them with curiosity.

“Please, Guildford,” Jane begs. In her panic, her tears no longer flow, but he can still see the shiny tracks on her cheeks. “The assumption will be that we’ve had a fight about Division Laws, that we aren’t united. Please. There’s so much at risk.”

“You’re selfish.” He speaks the accusation like a fact.

“I need you,” she says simply, neither challenging nor agreeing with him.

Guildford tells himself it’s manipulation that draws him towards her, that a consort is no better than a pawn in this chess match his wife and her adversaries are playing. Think he never had a prayer against her self-serving machinations is what Guildford must do to permit himself to get close to her instead of running.

“So, then,” he says, gaze hard as he looks down on Jane’s upturned face, “we stole away because we couldn’t help ourselves.”

Her eyes search his, but he won’t let her in.

“Yes,” she whispers.

“Because we put each other first.”

“Yes.”

“Because,” Guildford concludes, “we are very much in love.”

Jane’s eyes fill with tears, but before he’s forced to watch them spill, he kisses her. When her body sways into his grasp, he holds her, and they stumble towards the wall.

The foliage above them provides a partial screen—probably enough of a screen that they could just pretend to kiss, but Guildford doesn’t say this. He barely breaks away from her mouth enough to breathe. The rest is fake: what they imply when they lift the sumptuous fabric of her overskirt and the hoop skirt beneath, when he presses her to the wall and exaggerates the thrust of his hips. Their guests will believe what seems obvious—that Jane and Guildford, in their newlywed ardour, fled into semi-privacy to engage in the marital act.

It’s a performance of their shadows even more than their bodies. The brazier fires stretch their shapes up and along the wall. Guildford catches some of the performance when his eyes flicker open slightly, pining for a glimpse of his wife. He envies them; their shadows can’t feel distrust, or anguish, or betrayal. They can’t really love any more than they can really fuck. His eyes close again because the shadows can’t hold his attention like Jane does, like she actually, truly holds him, clutching his face so he won’t stop kissing her. Oh. He's scared her too.

Guildford argues through the kiss. You can survive without me, his lips insist. I can’t, without you. He keeps trying to separate them—not their mouths, but their lives. Stubbornly, Jane holds them together. The more adamantly she kisses him, the harder he tries to reconcile it with how he feels she abandoned him. She did, didn’t she? She basically told him she was going to stop trying, that she’s given up on a cure. But if she has, there can be nothing else about him to want! So why does she still want him?! Her fingers grip his jaw.

What if he’s only this, this mess who does things like distrust her and yell at her? What if he’s going to keep becoming a horse, every single day until the day of his death—which the horse thing will only serve to speed the approach of? What if he can fix every other part of himself, but not his transformation? Will he be a man worth having? Or did she fall in love with the cured man of their joint imagining? Does Guildford lose, after everything, to a fantasy, a fiction, a shadow?

Impulsively, Guildford shoves away from Jane. Her desperate panting is loud behind him as he strides to the nearest brazier and kicks the pole supporting it. She doesn’t call him back this time, and he kicks and kicks until the pole, which has been sunk firmly into the earth, comes loose and tilts at a wild angle. Chunked charcoal tumbles out, and fire spills like water across the grass, scorching it. But the lawn is damp tonight, preventing the fire from spreading. Either no one up above notices, or it’s all just part of the spectacle: the impassioned Guildford Dudley, showing off for his wife.

Quickly, the flames die, and Guildford and Jane stand in a darkened gap between the remaining braziers. He breathes hard in the aftermath of his destruction. They’re more hidden from their audience, but that hardly matters. He’s realized he has no performance left in him. Just himself.

Guildford goes to Jane. In the shelter of the wall, it smells like smoke and greenery and the wine on his breath. She looks concerned for him, for what he just did, but that was nothing, means nothing; there are hotter things than charcoal rattling around within him, burning him slowly from the inside out.

“You might not care,” he says quietly, “but I do. I care who I am. What I am.”

“I care that you’re unhappy,” Jane replies. Her speech is quick and her eyes pleading as if she’s worried he’ll storm off.

“I have every right to be! How can I be otherwise when you tell me I’m doomed? And you’ve already moved on! All of England is first in your heart!”

“That will never be true.”

Maybe because she’s afraid he would jerk his hand from her grasp, Jane grabs the front of his doublet instead.

“All the world comes before me,” he insists, and he can hear that it’s he who is the selfish one, not Jane like he accused.

“No one does,” she murmurs. Her hand relaxes as she flattens her palm over his heart.

“They should,” Guildford retorts. His heart pounds painfully. Can she feel? “It would be simpler.”

“But it would be a lie.”

Jane gazes steadily up at him. He knows she wouldn’t lie—for him maybe, but not to him. Nor he to her. And yet it suddenly feels as if he has been, that he’s been lying every moment he hasn’t told her aloud that he loves her. But, gods, how can he if she can’t heal him and he can’t forgive her?

“I’m sorry,” she says unexpectedly, lowering her gaze. Her hand slips from his chest to hang at her side. “I guess I’m no good to you now. You only wanted one thing, and I can’t give it to you.”

Guildford is taken aback. It feels as though her words compose the lines he was meant to say. He’s sorry. He’s no good to her. She only wanted one thing, a divorce, but a divorce—especially a royal divorce—means attention, and they cannot be scrutinized while he remains a horse. He’ll be discovered, and then they’ll both die, and it won’t fucking matter who Jane, in all her optimism, hoped to heal. She has never been the problem. It’s him, always him.

He does his best to say all this, but Jane gently places a hand across his lips. He stills. He quiets. When she takes her hand away, he leans forward and kisses her without a second thought. She returns his kiss uncertainly, he can feel it: her doubt and self-flagellation. Guildford pulls his mouth away and takes Jane by her upper arms.

“I wanted that one thing,” he agrees, “but you are what I need.”

“I let you down.”

“I asked for something impossible. And”—Guildford swallows nervously—“I’m sorry but I’m going to have to do it again.”

“What are you asking?” Jane’s hands find his on her arms and pull them down to clasp between their bodies.

“I’m asking you to love me,” he astounds himself by saying. He has to blink a few times. “Because I love you. I love you, Jane.”

He repeats it because his wife appears staggered by the declaration, and because he’s not actually sure he can stop, after guarding his feelings for her so closely.

“I love you whatever my form,” Guildford goes on. “I’m sorry I appointed you my saviour. I know you never asked me to.”

“You’ll love me even if I’m not?” she asks, eyes full of emotion.

“Of course. I’d love you if you were only the girl in the tavern and not queen.”

“Sometimes I wish I were,” Jane admits with a half-smile.

“No one’s ever looked at me the way you did across the room that night. I think I’ll always see that girl, that expression you wore. You’ll live in the corner of my eye.”

“Don’t speak like you’re leaving me.”

Guildford sighs and touches his forehead to Jane’s. He closes his eyes.

“I tried. I can’t.”

Their arms go around each other.

“But you’re angry with me,” she says.

“I wanted a miracle. I’m mostly angry with myself.”

Calm and soft and simple, Jane says, “I love you,” and Guildford opens his eyes, lifting his head.

“You do?”

“I love you more than the whole kingdom can contain. I still love you if you’re angry with me.” She smiles knowingly.

“The anger won’t last,” he promises.

“Good, because I hate it, and I’m no good at being stoic.”

“Shut up, you’re amazing at it.”

“Did you just tell me to shut up?” Jane demands, bristling, but Guildford kisses her with a smile on his face.

“Lovingly,” he insists between kisses.

He feels her smile back, then he kisses her deeply. He has to remind himself to keep his hands low; he wants to run one up the back of her neck, burrow his fingers into her done-up hair, but there’s the crown to worry about, and the fanning collar, and part of him can’t bear to dishevel the beautiful arrangement of her.

Though Jane might long to be the girl she was, lust-struck in a tavern, he finds her a thoroughly convincing queen. What does a queen do but strive for harmony amongst the disparate parts of her country? Guildford recognizes in Jane a similar striving to reconcile the two selves she’s named. There could be more, selves she hasn’t even articulated to herself. He understands. Gods, how he understands. It can be exhausting—except when he has her in his arms, in the dark. He chances skimming fingertips up the side of Jane’s neck when her head tilts as they kiss. He feels the blood jump beneath her skin, touching her below her jaw, then following the line of her jaw up to her ear. He feels the smooth, round pearls. Jane hugs him close to her, inviting his mouth down to hers again and again.

When they come away from the wall, Guildford has Jane on his arm. They look like they’ve been kissing. Sometimes, looks do not deceive.

[vashtijoy]

1/2: sojiro doesn't recognise akechi

YES. GOOD. THE BOY IS PRESENT WE BEGIN er

But let's have a look at slightly older Boy #2 here (Joker, of course, ties for Boy #1, while Morgana is a cat). Sojiro is being a bit weird in general here, and if you're like me, you might have missed it. Sojiro reacts to Akechi like a stranger: "oh, someone's ignored the closed sign and walked in..."

But Sojiro knows Akechi. He knows exactly what he did on 11/20, and before. He knows he worked for Shido. He knows he murdered Wakaba—Wakaba who, of course, is right there in Leblanc with them on 1/2.

I don't think Sojiro ever expresses an in-game opinion on Akechi after 11/20 (he certainly allows him back into Leblanc in January, so he may be deferring to Futaba like everyone else) but before the big November reveal, he likes him. He approves of him. If you talk to him when Akechi is at Leblanc for confidant 6, he'll tell you so:

(translator's note—学費 gakuhi, "tuition fees". If Akechi told Sojiro this, the chances that it is the whole truth are remote IMO—though I am attracted to the image of pre-evil Akechi working from a young-ish age to put himself through private school.)

Now, Akechi does not exactly endear himself to Sojiro on 8/28, when they first meet. But a week on, it seems as if Sojiro is at least trying to give Akechi a fair crack of the whip, and has maybe decided he's not so bad after all.

Later, on 10/22 when Akechi is on TV, Sojiro will ask if you ever heard from him again. You have, of course, likely not seen him since around 9/3 itself.

meanwhile in maruki's reality

Even within Maruki's reality, Sojiro is present for the explanation of how Akechi survived and turned himself in, on 12/25:

I can believe Sojiro missed most of the conversation, behind the counter like that, but no way did he miss Futaba's freakout here. He presumably knows who Akechi is at this point.

But by 1/2? He's forgotten. Wakaba is back, Morgana is human, everyone is happy, and nobody remembers that things were ever any other way, sure.

Akechi, though? He was never there. They never had that talk about school fees at the counter. Akechi never popped up on TV. If he was friends with Joker, Joker never brought him to Leblanc—or, in the original reality, Akechi never visited without an ulterior motive, meaning that when his crimes were erased from history, he never showed up at all. Not even for one of those shitty summer hangouts that waste a day.

So. Maruki ending Pleasant Boy is:

not a celebrity;

not familiar to Sojiro, because he never visited Leblanc;

not close enough to Joker yet to have spent time at Leblanc;

not a criminal and not dead, obvs.

I wonder how many other people he'd expect to know him simply have no memory of him at all.

[writergirl2011]

Regarding Hyle Hunt

There's been a little discourse regarding the role one Ser Hyle Hunt will play in Lady Brienne of Tarth's storyline going forward. Some people seem to think that he is her perfect match because they hate the idea that Brienne deserves to have a romance with the man she wants--aka one Ser Jaime Lannister--because that messes with the narrative they want to push, whatever that narrative may be.

Some people think that Ser Hyle Hunt is a more interesting and more remarkable man than he truly is, when nothing he's said or done to this point has shown him to be anything of the sort. Personally, I'm not impressed with a man who set up a bet with his buddies over a young noblewoman's virginity--which was essentially the kiss of death to said young woman, who didn't have much going for her on the marriage mart in the first place. (Don't give me the "men will be men" explanation. That makes you no better than Randyll Tarly.) And his proposal of marriage boils down to: "Hey, baby, you've got an island and a lot of money, I've got a functional dick that's already proven to be fertile. I can close my eyes and blow out the candle. Let's do it." How romantic.

There has been absolutely no indication that Brienne will ever love this man, or even care the slightest for him. Threatening to turn someone into a eunuch isn't playful banter, especially not when said man once bet on her virginity and the last time she confronted someone(s) in that bet, she beat the living shit out of them. She hasn't forgotten, and she really hasn't forgiven. And when it comes to Hyle, she never really will, because in her eyes, what he did was the worst of all of them. He came the closest to winning by doing the one thing none of the others did--he made her feel included, like she might be earning a little bit of respect in that camp. Then she found out it was all a lie.

"But she hated Jaime at first!" Yeah, but that was before Jaime: told a lie about Tarth's wealth to save her from rape; shouted "sapphires" and risked a beating to save her from rape again; risked his own life to save hers by jumping unarmed into a bear pit (with only one hand to boot), and revealed the truth about why he killed Aerys, thus revealing that rather than it being a callous act, he'd saved an entire city of innocents--a noble act. THEN he put his trust in her to find Sansa, gifting her with a horse, armor, and a priceless sword. He gave her the respect Hyle only pretended to give her, expecting nothing in return.

What has Hyle done on their road trip? When Brienne kills the three former Bloody Mummers, I'm curious: how long was Hyle there? At least long enough to see her and Pod burying Nimble Dick, but the way he's described sitting there casually makes me think he'd been there longer. Watching. Sitting back doing nothing while she might've been killed. And we don't know what his true motives are in following her. If she finds Sansa, is he going to help her get Sansa to safety--or is he going to betray her and try to turn Sansa in to the Crown for the reward?

If you want any further proof that she doesn't care about Hyle, think about who she tried to bargain for when Lady Stoneheart was about to hang them all. Not herself, and certainly not Hyle. Podrick, the boy. And when they were hanging, as she was dying. the only person she had eyes for was Pod.

And who did she presumably agree to kill Jaime for? Podrick.

Yeah. She's really going to come around on Hyle.

[nkn0va]

If it's ok with you could do a some headcannons of Tsubaki, Noel, and Makoto with a M!Reader that has acess to the Persona Izanagi-No-Okami

It's my personal favorite persona

Blazblue story would've looked mad different if there was a dude that could just whip out the Myriad Truths against Izanami and Terumi

For convenience sake, InO is going to be the result of S/O having a Drive to keep in line with lore.

-You were...on the average side when it came to combat back at Torifune. Your Ars Magus aptitude and physical prowess weren't by any means bad but nothing spectacular. This was however, until you awakened to a Drive by growing a connection with the Azure.

-You got the chance to show this off for the first time proper during the battle against Azrael. You had to hold him off while Professor Kokonoe was making the preparations to teleport him somewhere far away where he could never return from, and Ragna was not looking too good since Celica was disabling him pretty hard.

-That was when you finally revealed Izanagi No Okami for the first time. A move which predictably fired up Azrael quite a bit.

-Tsubaki for her part wasn't watching what was happening, that is until she sensed a vast power coming from the arena. Even she couldn't ignore that.

-Looking inside, she saw you of all people battling Azrael, a huge figure in pure white robes at your back. Like everyone else she's stunned. Despite knowing you for as long as she has, you'd never revealed you could do anything like that, let alone being powerful enough to fight the Mad Dog.

-The rescue mission happened to break her free from the Imperator's curse and the first thing she did when she finally got alone time with you was ask what you did against Azrael.

-As she hears the explanation, she can't help but feel safe, for what feels like the first time in years. You'd broken her free of the spell and you were even strong enough now to hold off a beast like Azrael. The future she envisioned with you now became even more secure.

-You've always been there to stand up for Noel, not afraid to throw down with anyone should you need to, no matter who they were. You seemed strangely confident in your combat abilities, no matter who you were staring down.

-Noel wished she could be as fearless as you, be able to stare down anyone in the eye with complete confidence. It was a huge reason she fell for you to begin with. She wanted to learn a thing or two from you on confidence.

-It was a while before she learned the 'why'. During the Ikaruga Civil War the two of you were deployed to intercept Sector Seven agents trying to do...something, it wasn't made clear what they were after.

-The two of you were ambushed, outnumbered and outgunned. That was until you revealed the power of your Drive for the first time. A manifestation of the creator god Izanagi himself, effortlessly wiping out the entire ambush force.

-Noel was only snapped out of her star struck state when you snapped her out of it and got moving again. Her admiration for you only increased tenfold that day, wishing she could do even half the things you could.

-Similar to Noel, you also readily stand up for Makoto when she's facing racially motivated bullying. Even if it was someone from the Duodecim itself you were prepared to stand up for your girlfriend.

-The fact you could so easily match Makoto's vigor and energy was a huge reason she fell for you. Whatever shenanigans she got up to, you were ready to meet the challenge.

-You went with her when she went off to look for Tsubaki after she'd gone missing and was under the Imperator's control. No matter how much you two tried to reach out to her, it was useless.

-She was also much stronger than before, Makoto wasn't ready for the Izayoi's power. You however, certainly were.

-You obviously kept Izanagi-no-Okami from going all out, you didn't want to kill Tsubaki, but the difference in your strength was more than obvious, and she was forced to retreat.

-Makoto is in complete shock, not knowing how to react. She'd never seen anything like it before, causing her to start bombarding you with questions the moment she finds her voice again.

-Seeing you kick ass like that made her so proud to have you as her s/o. If you could hold off Tsubaki like that so effortlessly you could probably even fight Azrael in the tournament coming up soon.

[luckykittysshowerthoughts]

I wonder why micheal keeps getting portrayed as abusive (specifically in simeon, lucifer and mammon based fics) especially when you consider that his canon self isn't that?? I know it's probably something of a scapegoat since it's easy to pin the character we know the least about as the most villainous but I'm curious about your thoughts

Personally, I think there's a few things at play. One of them is recognizing the shades of gray. Humans by nature have a tendency to sort things into black and white when they really shouldn't be, and I think this is an example of that.

Because, there is some truth to what they say. Michael can be downright creepy at times- from sneaking into Lucifer's room without permission being a clear sign of an unhealthy obsession, to the flat-out psychologically damaging stunt he pulled in Nightbringer. And don't even get me started on the angel event from the OG; I was pissed about that for a long time. He also clearly has a very prejudiced, derogatory view of demons, and is likely where Luke got it from. He's certainly not innocent.

BUT, I think people carry it too far. Yes, he's creepy, and yes he can be a colossal asshole. But he also displays clear, genuine care&compassion for others, especially his brothers, and seems to be trying his best to do good.

Such as with Simeon and Luke- he clearly genuinely cares about their wellbeing. As revealed in one of the Hard Mode chapters of Nightbringer, he was worried sick about sending them down to the Devildom, showering them with care packages and wanting constant reports to make sure they were alright. In the OG game, when he cast Simeon out, he didn't just leave him out to dry; he coordinated with the Devildom- which he's always hated- to ensure Simeon's safety, and sent his right-hand man down to protect him. He's implied to have angsted over the very idea too, having told MC in S3, "and of course, I have Simeon to think about." Both of these points will probably be their own posts eventually, because I have a lot to say about them.

And, for all his harassment of Lucifer, he seems to genuinely care about his wellbeing too. For example- saving MC's life in Nightbringer just because he recognized that they were important to Lucifer. This wasn't even because it got him closer to seeing Lucifer again; Lucifer had no way of knowing about this little favor. He did it just to make his brother happy.

There's also him cooperating with the exchange program in the first place. There was no reason Michael had to do that. In fact, considering the Celestial Realm's very traditional and conservative views, it would've been very likely for them to just say no. They didn't have to send anyone down. And yet Michael did. Not only that, but he hand-picked who to send. He clearly cares about and has stakes in this program. It seems that he's trying to change; he at the very least cooperates with those who believe there should be change.

Ultimately, he's a very flawed individual, trying to do his best by others through a lens warped by celestial propaganda and unhealthy coping mechanisms. He's a very morally gray character, and I think sometimes the internet has a hard time reconciling with that.

Especially since we don't have a face to put to Michael. That's the other issue. People are a lot less likely to sympathize with a faceless persona than they would be with their favorite hot demon boy. The brothers and even the side characters can get away with a lot more because we see and regularly interact with them. Because of Michael's secretive nature, often times you have to read between the lines to really understand the nuance of his character- it isn't spoon-fed to you through direct interaction like with many of the other characters. Because he obscures himself so much, it's a lot harder to humanize him, and to get a grasp on his motivations.

I also think a lot of people are looking for a "villain" in a story where there was never meant to be one. People seem to get this idea where every story needs to have a villain, and if they can't find one they make one. Obey Me was never about good guys and bad guys, heroes and villains. It's always been about highly flawed and dysfunctional individuals just doing their best. Plenty of drama and meaningful plot can be made from that alone. We don't need a clear villain, and it doesn't need to be Michael. I think a lot of people don't get that.

[lukaslosteyelashes]

I really wanted to post this before the London Special, also I’m sorry in advance if anything is incoherent or not grammarly correct. I had a bit of a trouble collecting my thoughts and write this but I tried my best.

Anyways, let’s go!

*Edit: I was wrong lol

Tomoe Tsurugi was the main reason why people now view Gabriel Agreste as a hero of Paris

At first I haven’t thought much about the season 5 finale, overall I liked it, but then it started to bug me: why was it necessary to make Gabriel Agreste the hero of Paris, how did it happen and whose idea was it, who would benefit from it?

Ladybug/Marinette

She probably had to make a public announcement to the media at some point that Monarch was defeated, that’s a topic that cannot be avoided after all, and there is also the fact that Gabriel Agreste died at the end of that fight.

Gabriel is a famous fashion designer, a public figure who, even though spent the last bit of his life basically isolated, is known far and wide. His death would be something that shakes the rich and the poor alike. So what would happen if Marinette would reveal that their adored fashion designer was also the villain that kept the entire population of Paris in terror? Nothing good and his son, Adrien would suffer the most because of it.

If we’re at Adrien. There is also Gabriel’s final wish, which was to keep this a secret from his son, so Adrien could only remember the times when he was trying to be a good father to him [which happened like once or twice during the 5 seasons].

Would Ladybug call Gabriel a hero to the press?

I don’t think so, maybe not intentionally, the press could put a lot of pressure on people. I can imagine that Ladybug being confused of what happened and also distressed that she couldn’t find the butterfly miraculous, so she might said something that she didn’t meant or the press made her say things.

Marinette probably fulfilled Gabriel’s final wish because she wants Adrien to be happy and free and spilling the beans about everything would achieve the opposite. With Gabriel’s death there’s no Monarch anymore either, that’s what matters no one really needs to know that the two were the same (not even his son). It’s an end of an era and the beginning of a (not so promising) new one.

Side note: Do you remember that in "Conformation" Ladybug sent a message to Chat Noir that Gabriel Agreste is Monarch? Adrien still can learn about the truth from her IF the message came through.

Nathalie

She was Gabriel’s accomplice from the start who would have helped him as Mayura until the end if he didn’t went off from his original plan. But as Gabriel went more and more crazy and the videos about Emilie waked her up. Also during the time she was bedridden she had plenty of time reflecting on her wrong doings as well.

Although, she wasn’t able to do much to stop Gabriel because of the state that she was in near the end and if she revealed the truth about Monarch then she would also get found out.

Natalie was definitely shocked and confused but also happy to learn about Gabriel’s final choice, still she wouldn’t declare him as a hero after everything that he did, and she definitely feels guilty of what she did as well, but would play along for the sake of Adrien’s happiness.

Lila (or whatever her real name)

Since we yet to learn what her true motives are, I don’t have much of an idea what she would do and why, but she’d definitely benefit form this situation.

Lila figured out Hawkmoth's true identity much earlier than Marinette and she was also able to collect informations about him and his past and most certainly knows that Adrien is a sentimonster as well. And let's not forget that she was able to seize the butterfly miraculous and rumored to be the next Hawkmoth. Because of these she has some advantage and could reveal the truth to Adrien, to Paris and to the World at any moment. And for this reason, Gabriel being a celebrated hero, comes in handy for her.

Just imagine this situation: Lila wants Marinette to loose everything and become pitiful. And what would make Marinette more distressed than seeing her beloved boyfriend being miserable? So Lila would reveal the truth to Adrien with showing all of the information that she collected as a proof, Adrien starts to loose all trust in his late father and Nathalie, maybe even in his late mother as well. He had already shown signs of being emotionally unstable before and this would be the last straw, not even Marinette would be able to comfort him. Lila, of course would observe the situation carefully from afar, waiting for the right opportunity. Adrien because of all of this, became so careless that he transforms into Chat Noir which Lila saw and akumatize him. Then BOOM... Chat Blanc became the future that Ladybug wanted to avoided at all cost...

That’s one hell of a scenario, but seeing how Lila became so obsessed with completely destroying Marinette, I think she’d do something like that. Also with having an as powerful akumatized ally as Chat Blanc on her side she'd be unstoppable.

So what’s the deal with Tomoe Tsurugi?

At first I thought that she would be furious about Gabriel messing up their whole plan about gaining Ladybug’s and Chat Noir’s miraculouses to create a new world with a wish, but Tomoe likely realized that she could very well use this to her advantage and created this image about Gabriel as the hero of Paris. But why would she needed to do that?

The Alliance rings

The Alliance rings basically were one of the biggest main issues in the 5th season. They were created by Gabriel and Tomoe which was known all across the Globe, there was a whole marketing campaign about it, featuring Adrien and Lila, later Kagami.

When the Alliance rings started to turn almost every users into a Ladybug and Chat Noir hunting robot, every sane person instantly thought about Monarch making all the mess. But how come no one seems to connect the whole ruckus to Gabriel and Tomoe? [It shouldn’t be a surprise since the majority of the characters are blind.] Even if no one suspects either to be Monarch, the happenings should connect Gabriel and Tomoe to him in some way.

So I think, Tomoe wanted to avert suspicion by creating this hero image.

The head of the Tsurugi Industries probably wasn’t pleased that her partner in crime changed his mind last minute, had a different wish than they agreed on and Ladybug was able to get back all the miraculouses (except Nooroo). Now she also has to face the possiblity of getting caught, that people would slowly [really slowly] start to realize that she also had something to do with all of this. So how could she be able to avert the suspicion?

By playing the victim.

Deceiving the public by saying that her and Gabriel were both used by Monarch and that they couldn’t do anything because they were threatened with Adrien’s and Kagami’s life, so their only choice was to help him hijack the Alliance rings. With that it was easy to see Gabriel’s action as heroic because in the eyes of the people he just wanted to save his son by sacrificing himself, and Tomoe is also able to continue her pursue for the miraculouses without people suspecting anything.

To make things worse, she’s now taken over the Agreste brand, and it also looks like all those inventions, to make Paris more eco friendly [you can see them at the end of the season 5 finale] are also products of the Tsurugi Industries. And let's be real, I'm certain that she wants to control Paris from the background by swamping the city with her machines. The statue of Gabriel, which was created from the remaining Alliance rings, looks suspicious as well.

I hope it's not a complete bs theory

[bestworstcase]

like as much as folks talk about how V9 turned the life/death theme on its head to "reveal" that the brothers' "delicate balance" was artificial—it didn't. the lost fable SHOWED US that balance was arbitrary and mutable, the god of darkness resurrects ozma with a snap of his fingers, salem dies and rises deathless, humanity is wiped out and then returns, the god of light imposes a torturous form of reincarnation into ozma to mold him into a weapon. V9 read the subtext out loud and provided explanatory notes, is all.

and you do sort of have to read the narrative themes about death and loss and grief in context with how death works mechanically in the story, otherwise you wind up in a weird place where the point you are making in essence boils down to "being religious is arrogant and immature" by way of reading salem's petitions to the brothers for ozma's life as fundamentally contrary to the story's themes. no! she's the orpheus to a god whose desiccated heart cannot be moved by the music of grief because he cares only for rules, for order, not people!

destruction is change. death is change, as is life, because one cannot exist without the other after the brothers strip death from her, salem exists in abject misery for decades until one day she looks out her window and sees that a new city has risen there; life goes on. even the smallest spark of hope is enough to ignite change—salem knows this better than anyone. she sought death until she saw life and understood. perhaps the gods were not as powerful as they seemed; they were fallible.

she sees this:

and she hurls the sword away from herself because she has, abruptly, almost violently discovered that out there is something worth living for. something worth fighting for.

the lost fable is not objective truth—jinn tells this story through ozpin's eyes, all his mistakes and presumptions intact—and on the matter of salem's emotional interiority and motivations the telling is especially suspect. salem might have become mired forever in grief, stagnating and unable to change—but she didn't. she saw the world changing without her and wrenched herself free to take part in it. to act. to live. destruction incarnate.

notice what she did not do: try to bring ozma back to life.

she spent decades in that house, desperate to join him in death. and then she accepted that she couldn't, that wallowing in anguish miserably stabbing herself for the rest of time was pointless, so she pressed on. found something new to live for and committed herself to that cause with the same absolute devotion she gave to him. oh, she kept a faint hope alive that she might find a way to make herself mortal again, but her driving motivation was to overthrow the gods who had shown her such breathtaking cruelty and pettiness. when the gods slaughtered the world she vowed to come back, to keep trying, to keep going.

it doesn't take a lot of power to bring someone back from the dead. pietro figured out how to do it by carving out bits of his own soul, and the ambrosius experiment suggests that a soul without a body will simply manifest a new body. all you really need to do is reach across the void and pull the soul you want back to remnant—and salem has lived long enough, and certainly has enough power to have figured that out and done it if she chose to. she didn't choose to. even after she witnessed humankind rise from the ashes, she chose to let ozma remain dead until he chose to return. she understood and accepted that this was not her choice to make.

& that's what accepting death means in a world where death isn't necessarily permanent. life is for the living and it's for the dead to choose.

[charlie-pippin-faraday]

V3 TRIAL 2 UPDATE

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH I WAS RIGHT I WAS RIGHT I WAS COMPLETELY FUCKING RIGHT!!!!!!!! SHE DID IT KIRUMI DID IT I WAS 100% RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!! god i'm so smart i'm so fucking smart i caught onto it immediately i knew it and it feels so good to be right about it. and i was like mostly right about how it went down!! i KNEW she handcuffed him and drowned him in the big fucking sink!!! and i knew she moved him window to window into the gym!!! i knew she used the cable and the rope! i didn't predict the rope slide on the inner tube and tbh i thought she would've knocked him out by putting something in his food rather than clocking him on the head, but overall i was still right!!!! AND i was right about him being in the piranha tank!!!!!!!! i totally forgot about the pane of glass so that makes sense why they didn't eat them but i TOTALLY called him being in the piranha tank. i didn't predict the right timing, but i don't think that's my fault, they kind of threw a curveball on me mid-trial with maki revealing she'd talked to ryoma after nighttime had started

the motive/why she did it i was a little less on the mark on. i DID predict it had something to do with her getting her kubs pad, though was not correct on the manner, i really thought kokichi would've given it to her, i did not expect the sheer luck of her getting her own (luck? makoto naegi haunting the narrative once again). and no one requested her to kill him like i'd predicted - though ryoma kind of gave himself up to be killed, which was kind of in the general vein of one of my theories. she didn't do it while everyone was in the bug room like i'd thought, but i'm pretty sure she was running around preparing at that time, and her having access to the stuff she'd helped prep in the gym helped her with the murder, so i'm counting my lines of reasoning here to be right as well.

additional commentary throughout the trial:

lmao kokichi was taking NO fucking prisoners with all those absolutely scathing insults to miu

"my goatee makes me look like a glamorous celebrity" lol

"that's our kaito, right?" aw shuichi

lmao everyone be calling kaito an idiot

"that hopeless idiot may have encouraged me a bit" lol is that just maki and kaito's relationship in a nutshell?

"she's not lying! can't you tell just by looking at her?" i think i'm watching a man actively becoming down bad in real time. during a TRIAL

i relied on the walkthrough much less this time! being razor-focused on what i thought went down and who i thought did it (and also being right about it) certainly helped. multiple choice questions were no problem, and i can do the mass debates pretty well - didn't need help with that part! the shooting is actually alright, i can do that (i also got the laser beam perk or whatever it's called to make it shoot faster which was a HUGE help). now, the other minigames in the trial? uhhhh now those i needed help with lol

was i, shuichi saihara, hitting hookers with my car in that minigame? was that what was happening???

i REALLY hate the lying mechanic. i hate hate hate it. it's difficult, it doesn't make sense, and i'm fundamentally opposed to it. this is a TRIAL, it's about finding the TRUTH, why in the world are you fucking forcing me to LIE?! developers there HAD to be a better way than that

okay i've come to the conclusion that the stuff on the kubs pads is utter fucking bullshit and completely made up. because you CANNOT convince me that kirumi was running the nation, that simply is not possible. like i simply refuse to believe it. and also, i know the lore of these games, the world has already fallen into despair, is there even a government to run? if the dumpling that looks like makoto naegi is "someone i'm pretty sure i've seen before" then this doesn't take place in the past, and this is already a despair-filled world! and i might not remember correctly, weren't the motive videos in the first game fabricated as well? to a point, at least, 'cause didn't it show sayaka's idol group dead, but in reality they were just abducted? idk, i might not be remembering that right. idk, something about this just doesn't pass the smell test. there's no way her kubs pad is real. and i don't care that upon seeing it she "remembered" the memory, they have erased and tampered with the memories of the kids in every single one of these games. it would be easy to implant false memories, especially ones that preyed upon her internal need to serve and help people and even amplified it so that there were millions of people needing her help. like giving her a false memory like that is such an obvious way to potentially make her go off the deep end. there's no way it's real, it's just a manipulation

another reason i do not believe it is real: there is NO FUCKING CHANCE ryoma had NO ONE who cared for him, like i also fucking refuse to believe that. THAT is ALSO a deliberate manipulation of ryoma, a man who was already hanging by a thread searching for something to latch onto and to fight for. like that's nothing but a manipulation into making him give up. there probably IS someone, but of course monokuma wouldn't tell him that, it's just a lie to make him give up and die in the game. and that's absolutely cruel

man kirumi really fucking lost it right at the end there, huh? there's something so fascinating to watch about the most dignified, composed person here losing their composure and rapidly unraveling, fighting to reach an outside world that is probably a complete fabrication. man, what a tragedy.

the maki reveal is...not unexpected, tbh. there was so much shady stuff about her. and like toko in the first game, there is not a CHANCE she is killing a single person in this game lol

keebo watching maki strangling kokichi by the throat like "man, why didn't i think of that?"

and thus concludes my trial commentary! man i almost hit the bullseye on this one, i feel so fucking smart. and i think that's about as high as i'm gonna feel, i don't anticipate i'll be as right on the money with any of the rest of these murders lol

on to chapter 3!

[nanomooselet]

Episode Eleven: To a New World

Deep breaths. Uh, pre-emptive apologies; I keep the tightest grip I can over my tone, but this ep sliced me off at the knees. There's a lot of anger in it.

I like Wolfwood. Lots of people do. And I like Knives. Besides Vash himself they pop up on my dash more frequently than any other character. Maybe I like Knives more than Wolfwood because I enjoy poking his horrible trash brain with a stick, but Nick's certainly got his charms.

But I can't get around it. This is the episode where Knives... violates Vash. And this is the episode where Wolfwood turns his back as Vash is screaming in pain and despair, reliving all the worst moments of his life. For reasons (I'M WORKING ON IT and they're not that Meryl is The Girl), Wolfwood was never going to be the one to save Vash from his agony. Back in the initial watch, before I knew anything else, I knew it just wasn't going to happen.

So, sorry, Nick - you’ve had a rough time, but I still giggled when Meryl kicked you in the shin as you tried to pretend you didn't give a shit. I needed the levity. Off you go, brood over your sins and the whatnot. I'm sure Vash is gonna be just fine.

And you, Millions Knives. Today it's the tire iron.

This is the first time we finally see him fully revealed - full face, cloak discarded, even his thoughts themselves laid bare. (By the way, he's not actually naked; that's just a very, very tight bodysuit. I think he wears it so he looks like his idea of what a Masculine Plant is, like an Italian Renaissance sculpture. Also pretty sure he made it himself. Without it, he'd look just as human as Vash does.) Knives spends a lot of time talking, often very passionately... but you still cannot trust anything he says to be the truth; not about himself, not about Vash. At best, there might be a tiny sprinkle of truth prettying up a great big lie. Or he genuinely believes what he's saying; it's just that he's confidently wrong. I don't doubt, for instance, that Vash really is motivated by a lot of guilt over the Fall, not least because Knives was the one who put that guilt on Vash and left it to slowly consume him. Nonetheless I always think back to the line, "Does their praise cure it? The loneliness?" because, well, no? It doesn't? Because that’s not the point. Vash doesn't do what he does for praise or to avoid loneliness. If you try and tell him he's good at something he brushes you off - "just lucky!" and then he's vanished through the backdoor before you can thank him.

Similarly, we see a moment where Knives just straight up changes reality to suit his narrative - when poor Rollo called for Vash, he said that he wanted to live. In Knives's world, he begs Vash for death.

When Knives says these things, it's not accurate criticism of Vash, or of his philosophy, or even anything to do with the Plants. It's not the truth. It's not an argument. It's a probe.

Especially in this episode. Knives is trying to rip Vash open. He’s searching for the points where he can apply pressure - the most efficient means to break him down. How true his words are is not relevant. Only whether or not they hurt Vash, weaken his resolve, undermine his ego and confidence - which he already barely has anyway because of Knives.

Why the hell would he do this? I mean, as much as I can be sure of anything with this guy, I’m sure that Knives loves Vash very much. His brother might well be all that he loves - all that he has left. We can argue about what kind of love (though it's really not a debate I want to get into, so I’ll capitalise the words Very Normal and leave it at that). But it is love. Forget about the higher plane and the dependent Plants (which is to say I'll try and find a way to get down my thoughts on them, but not at this time). Knives is doing what he’s doing because he loves Vash.

Specifically, he’s doing it so that Vash won't leave him.

Imagine how the moments before the crash must have felt for Rem. Every second counts in an emergency, and yet she took the time, perhaps selfishly, to ensure her children escaped before anyone else. I think she'd already decided to go back for the sleepers, but the longer she went without doing so the less possible it became and the harder it got to keep her resolve. Still she took those precious moments, the last they ever had together, for the love of her boys. A chance was all she had to give them, but her work was done too soon.

And Nai. With the knowledge of the rest of the series he was acting so calm because he planned this, and it went just the way he expected it would – until the moment he reached out his hand, and Rem said no. We don't see his face, but we do see Vash, pleading desperately, thrown hard back into his seat, and it was Nai who did that when Rem refused him.

Remember? Nai offered Rem a choice.

So to Knives, that left Vash to be only thing in the world that matters as much completing his crusade. I suspect he views the two as the same goal – having Vash back means killing the humans, and killing the humans means Vash is his. His and Vash's safety, togetherness, and freedom means there must be absolutely nothing left of humanity.

Even if it's the intrinsic humanity of his brother. (And of him. But he's not going to acknowledge that. Nope.)

So Knives didn't simply want Vash without his memories. Knives is a perfectionist - he hates to even admit to the possibility that he might have made a mistake, to the point where he assigns all blame for his actions to Vash. Vash's emotional development under his total control would be too unpredictable, too likely to fail. If given a choice, Vash could make the same choice that Rem did (again), and that risk is simply unacceptable.

So what Knives wants is for Vash to be without autonomy, devoid of independence - a shadow that he casts, empty of agency save that which Knives enacts through him. A graven image. Depending only upon him. Needing only him. If it means he'll finally be first before humanity, rather than alongside or behind them, he won't be all alone. It's only together that they can be perfect, because it's obviously what Vash is for.

After all, they're twins. Vash was born to be with Knives.

I'm sure he's just happy to be useful.

[morlock-holmes]

So, a narrative that has gotten hold in left-wing circles is that of "dangerous misinformation".

The sort of underlying assumption is that is that there is a problem with too much credulity in this country. The paranoid style of politics is based on being too credulous, and getting information from sources that aren't reliable, and then acting on that unreliable information.

The solution, then, is to put out more reliable information, and teach skepticism so that people might begin to better suss out which sources of information are reliable and which are not.

I don't think that's a bad goal, obviously such skills are useful and necessary, but it does feel like it misses a dynamic which seems to me to characterize paranoid politics.

I've been listening to the Knowledge Fight podcast about Alex Jones, and particular their breakdowns of the depositions that members of his company gave during the Sandy Hook defamation cases.

And what I heard from them, in justifying their actions, was something that, yes from a certain standpoint you could call it credulity, but it seems to me more like a radical skepticism.

When asked whether or not something like "Sandy Hook Elementary was not an operating school at a given date" was a fact which is either true, or false, there was a LOT of hemming and hawing, and the answer basically boiled down to,

"No."

The reasoning is essentially this. The media is so corrupt, and so heavily captured by special interests and hostile interests, that using it to find out any facts at all is essentially impossible.

We live in a world so thoroughly saturated with misinformation that the usual standards you'd think of to determine what is true and what is false are completely impossible to put into practice.

Sure, you might find a piece of evidence saying that Sandy Hook was operating at such and such a date, but how could you ever possibly be sure that evidence wasn't planted or manufactured?

I believe it was Paul Joseph Watson who pretty much said that out loud.

Instead, we have to rely on a different heuristic.

If a news story implies a result that we wouldn't like, then it is likely to be false, and more specifically, it was probably planted to generate that result.

The InfoWars people were very open that their first reaction to the Sandy Hook story was that the Democrats were going to use it as an excuse to enact gun legislation, and that this was the reason that they really started to try to push the story that it hadn't happened.

In terms of real world facts it's crazy to think that Sandy Hook happened because of the Democrats, but it's not completely insane to start looking for evidence against something you dislike.

What makes for crazy is that these are people who fundamentally don't believe that it's possible to find evidence.

You don't look for evidence (At least, not in the sense you or I would understand), you look for "anomalies" to use their word.

Here I'm extrapolating, but essentially this mindset seems to involve a thinking like this.

"Because there is no way to actually acquire evidence of truth or falsity, anybody who insists too much on the truth of their beliefs is suspicious. Why would they be so insistent when we all know that all beliefs are essentially impossible to objectively verify? It certainly can't be because they have evidence, that can't exist anymore in the modern world.

"So they must have some other reason. And the best way to figure out that other reason is to figure out what they would gain if their story happened to be accepted as true by the public.

"Once you understand what motivates their story, you need to go searching for anomalies which would reveal the truth of the matter, which is that they have no objective or factual reason to be so insistent"

The InfoWars position is, in some sense, credulous because they absolutely cannot differentiate between a good source and a bad source, but the more I listen to them talk the more convinced I am that they have embraced such a radical skepticism that they don't actually believe that it's possible to differentiate between sources.

[nicolettesdreamworld]

Guilty as sin - Chapter 23

Nicolette and Elijah were rifling through Alaric’s belongings, searching for anything that might hint at the truth. The silence was thick, broken only by the sound of her phone buzzing. Nicolette glanced at the screen, sighing as she answered, “Elena, what’s going on?”

There was a pause on the other end before Elena's hesitant voice replied, “I… think I just got arrested.”

Nicolette stiffened. “Elena, what did you do?” she demanded, while Elijah’s sharp gaze locked onto her, waiting.

“We broke into Dr. Fell’s apartment,” Elena confessed. “Matt and I—we were looking for anything that could prove Ric’s innocence.”

Nicolette’s eyes widened in shock. “You did what?”

Elijah's brows furrowed as he looked at Nicolette. “What’s going on?”

On the other end, Elena hesitated, clearly recognizing his voice. “Was that Elijah?”

Nicolette’s tone turned icy. “You lost the privilege of asking questions, Elena,” she replied firmly.

Elena’s voice dropped to a whisper, urgency lacing her words. “We found something, Nicolette.”

Nicolette's heart skipped, feeling a flicker of hope. “What did you find?”

“A letter from the coroner,” Elena revealed, her voice trembling with relief. “It says he made a mistake—the first victim died earlier than he originally reported. Ric has an alibi, Nicolette. It couldn’t have been him. The sheriff will have to let him go.”

For the first time in hours, Nicolette felt the weight lift, her grip on the phone tightening. "Elena… you might have just saved him."

"Actually, we didn’t," Elena said, her voice tense with caution. "If Dr. Fell hid the letter and we found it, it wouldn’t be admissible in court. But luckily, she only hid a copy. The real one—the one that counts—she already gave to the sheriff. Meredith is on our side, Nicolette."

Nicolette let out a slow, stunned breath. "So, Dr. Fell’s been playing both sides this whole time," she muttered, the pieces clicking together.

"I’m not sure what her motives are," Elena replied, a hint of doubt in her voice. "But I’ll talk to you later—the sheriff just got here."

Nicolette ended the call, the tension lingering as she glanced at Elijah. “It seems Meredith Fell is full of surprises,” she murmured, the realization sinking in. "Who knew she'd play hero today?"

Elijah studied her carefully, his grip firm on the worn leather notebook. “Do you trust her?” he asked, voice low, as if the question itself might unravel something deeper.

Nicolette’s eyes hardened, shadows flickering across her face. “I don’t trust anyone, Elijah. Not anymore.” Her voice was cold, laced with bitterness. “Not you, not the Salvatores, and certainly not Elena—not as long as they’re in her ear.” She shook her head, a harsh laugh escaping. “And as for Ric… I want to believe he’s innocent, but even that feels like a lie I can’t afford.”

Elijah hesitated for a moment before placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder, his grip firm yet gentle. “I can’t promise you my loyalty when it comes to my family,” he admitted, his voice steady. “But this… this has nothing to do with them. I intend to stand by your side through it all.” His gaze bore into hers, a mixture of determination and sincerity. “Whether it’s proving Alaric’s innocence or helping you bury the bodies he leaves behind, I’ll be there for whatever you decide.” The weight of his words hung in the air, an unspoken promise that transcended the chaos around them.

Nicolette held his gaze, feeling the warmth of his sincerity envelop her like a comforting cloak. “Thank you,” she mumbled, her voice barely a whisper, yet heavy with meaning. It was a simple phrase, but it carried the weight of her gratitude, a fleeting moment of connection amidst the turmoil. In that instant, the world outside faded, leaving just the two of them, bound by shared burdens and unspoken fears.

But the moment shattered as the sound of rattling keys pierced the air. The door swung open, revealing Alaric, his presence a beacon of relief in the storm of chaos. “Ric,” Nicolette breathed, her heart racing as she rushed toward him, collapsing into his arms with an overwhelming sense of safety. The world around her faded, and for a heartbeat, nothing else mattered but the warmth of his embrace, the familiar scent of him—a reminder that amid the darkness, there was still light to hold onto.

Alaric was momentarily taken aback by her sudden affection; they weren't accustomed to such displays of intimacy. Yet, given the gravity of the situation, the uncharacteristic warmth between them felt almost necessary. He wrapped his arms around her tightly, savoring the comfort of her presence, knowing that in this chaotic world of supernatural threats and looming darkness, moments like these were rare treasures. As Nicolette clung to him, he felt a flicker of hope igniting within him, reminding them both that even in the depths of despair, there was still a bond worth fighting for.

Elijah observed the embrace, his expression a mix of understanding and resolve. After a heartbeat, he discreetly gestured to Alaric, signaling that he would be upstairs, granting them the space they needed. As he turned to ascend the staircase, he felt a strange sense of protectiveness wash over him. He knew that in this tangled web of alliances and betrayals, Nicolette needed this moment—an anchor amid the storm.

“I need you to be honest with me, Ric,” Nicolette said, her voice steady but her eyes searching his. “Did you do it?”

Alaric looked at her, surprise flickering across his face, quickly morphing into confusion. “What? No, of course not,” he replied, his tone incredulous.

“And you’re 100% sure?” Nicolette pressed, a mix of worry and urgency threading through her words. The weight of her question hung in the air, thick and suffocating, as she awaited his answer, hoping for the reassurance that would quell the doubts gnawing at her.

"Honestly?" Alaric said, his brow furrowing as he met her gaze. "I've learned not to be sure of anything in this life that we lead."

His voice was tinged with a gravity that sent a shiver down Nicolette’s spine. The uncertainty that hung between them felt palpable, a dark cloud overshadowing the fragile moment they were sharing. She could see the turmoil in his eyes, the weight of the world pressing down on his shoulders, and for a fleeting moment, she wondered if he was hiding more than just the truth about the murders.

But just as the tension thickened, a sharp knock echoed through the room. Alaric swung the door open, revealing Meredith, her expression a mix of urgency and remorse.

"I know what this looks like," she began, her voice trembling slightly.

"Yeah? Because I sure as hell don’t!" Alaric shot back, frustration boiling over. "You shoot me, have me thrown in jail, and then you have me freed?"

"I did it for you, Ric," Meredith insisted, her eyes pleading. "I forged the coroner's note to clear your name."

Nicolette felt her stomach drop at the revelation. If Meredith had manipulated the evidence, then Ric didn’t have an alibi at all. The horrific possibility that he could still be responsible for those murders loomed large in her mind, casting a shadow over their reunion.

"Ahh, you know what? People are right. You are a psycho," Alaric spat, his frustration boiling over as he moved to close the door. But Meredith wedged her foot in, refusing to be dismissed.

"Look, you’ve been cleared. They won’t look your way again. Please, you may not have a reason to trust me, but I need you to do it anyway," she implored, desperation lacing her words.

“Let her in,” Nicolette said suddenly, stepping forward, her voice steady despite the chaos swirling in her mind. “She deserves a chance to explain herself.”

"Nicolette?!" Elijah's voice echoed from upstairs, pulling her attention away from the tense scene below.

"Excuse me," she murmured to Meredith and Alaric before darting up the stairs, her heart racing with urgency. When she entered her bedroom, she found Elijah poring over the small leather-bound notebook he had clutched earlier. His furrowed brow told her he wasn't bearing good news.

"What is it?" she asked, her gaze narrowing as she took in his expression.

"You mentioned something similar happened in the 1900s, right? Someone was killing council members?" he began, his voice grave. "You theorized it was a woman because nobody back then believed women were capable of such violence."

Nicolette nodded, feeling a chill run down her spine. "Yeah, that’s what I thought."

Elijah's eyes darkened as he continued, "You were right. It was Samantha Gilbert. At least, I think it was. She was losing track of time, going mad, forgetting things… Sound familiar?"

Nicolette's breath caught in her throat. "Ric," she gasped, realization dawning.

"And just like Ric, she wore the Gilbert ring," Elijah added, his tone heavy with implication. "You have to consider that something which allows you to cheat death is bound to have its toll on you one day."

Nicolette felt her stomach twist. She had wondered about the side effects of the ring ever since she first learned of its existence. Could it really be warping Alaric's mind, just as it had Samantha's? Panic surged within her as the pieces of the puzzle began to fit, the unsettling possibility settling over her like a dark cloud.

"He killed them, didn't he? He killed them and then stabbed himself," Nicolette whispered, the weight of the revelation pressing heavily on her chest.

Elijah nodded, his expression a mix of concern and resignation. "What are you going to do?" he asked, knowing all too well the dangerous path Nicolette was about to tread.

"Whatever I have to do to keep him safe," she replied fiercely, determination igniting in her eyes.

"He is a murderer, Nicolette," Elijah stated, the words hanging in the air like a bitter truth.

"So am I, and you, and basically everyone we know," Nicolette shot back, her voice steady. "In this world, the line between right and wrong is so blurred that it barely exists anymore. We all have blood on our hands."

Elijah’s gaze softened, understanding her turmoil. It was a harsh reality they had all come to accept, yet Nicolette's loyalty to Alaric pushed her to confront the darkness in their lives head-on. She knew the risks, but for her, love and friendship were worth fighting for, even against the ghosts of their past.

Nicolette suddenly turned on her heel, determination coursing through her veins as she made her way downstairs. Elijah followed closely behind, the tension thickening with each step.

As she descended, the conversation from the living room grew louder. "I think you're sick. And I want to help you," she heard Meredith say, her voice laced with urgency. "This has happened before. A hundred years ago."

Nicolette’s heart raced as she stepped into the room, her gaze darting between Meredith and Alaric. The atmosphere shifted, and both of them looked up, surprise flashing in their eyes.

"Ric," Nicolette breathed out, her voice barely a whisper. "I think she's right."

Alaric’s brow furrowed, confusion mingling with the fear in his eyes. "What are you talking about?" he asked, his voice shaky.

"Meredith believes that what you’re going through isn’t just a coincidence. It’s a pattern—a cycle that could lead you down a dark path, just like it did before," she explained, her words tumbling out in a rush.

"Cycle?" Alaric echoed, disbelief etched on his face.

Meredith stepped forward, her expression earnest. "It happened to someone else—a woman named Samantha Gilbert. She lost herself in her madness, just like you’re losing control now."

Nicolette took a step closer to Alaric, her heart aching at the fear and pain etched across his features. "We can help you, Ric. But you have to let us in. You can't face this alone."

The room fell silent, the weight of her words hanging heavily in the air as they all grappled with the truth.

"I won't let you kill anyone else, understand?" Nicolette said firmly, her voice steady and unwavering. Each word dripped with conviction, and she locked her gaze onto Alaric, willing him to comprehend the gravity of her promise.

His eyes widened, a mix of surprise and guilt washing over his features. "Nicolette, I—" he started, but she cut him off.

"No. This isn’t just about you anymore. It’s about the people who care about you and those who are at risk. We can’t let this spiral out of control." Her heart raced as she spoke, the reality of their situation crashing down on her like a wave.

Alaric looked away, his fists clenched at his sides. "I never wanted this. I never meant to hurt anyone."

"I know," she replied, softening her tone but holding her ground. "But we need to confront this darkness together. You have to promise me you’ll fight it. Because if you don’t, I will do everything in my power to stop you."

A heavy silence enveloped them as the weight of her words settled in the room. Nicolette’s heart ached for the man she cared for, knowing that the battle ahead would be as much against the demons within him as against any external threat.

"Nicolette," Elijah said softly from behind her, his voice a gentle reminder of the support that lingered just outside her tempest of emotions. She turned slightly, catching a glimpse of his concerned expression, which mirrored her own turmoil.

"Do you think I can keep this?" Elijah asked, holding the diary of Samantha Gilbert, his brow furrowed in thought. "It might help me figure out how to help you."

Nicolette nodded, her voice steady. "Whatever you need to figure out how to help him, I’m in. We can’t let him slip away into that darkness."

Elijah's eyes softened as he took in her fierce determination. "We’ll analyze every entry, every moment she documented. There has to be a clue about how to break this cycle."

Nicolette crossed her arms, a protective instinct rising within her. "And if it means confronting whatever demons he has, so be it. I refuse to stand by while he suffers alone."

A whirlwind of chaos had engulfed Nicolette in the past few days. She hadn’t heard a word from Elijah, and yet the world seemed to spiral further out of control. Alaric had unwittingly tapped into a vampire-hating alter ego, a monster lurking beneath his skin that had almost claimed Meredith's life. It was a chilling reminder of how thin the veil of sanity could be. But Bonnie had stepped in, offering a lifeline with some foul-tasting herbs that could suppress this dark side—for now. The catch was clear: without a consistent supply, Alaric would slip back into that abyss.

Nicolette buried herself in the stacks of ancient tomes, her fingers tracing over the yellowed pages in search of anything—any hint, any whisper of a remedy that might save him for good. The dusty library had become her sanctuary, a refuge from the turmoil brewing outside. It offered her focus, a welcome distraction from the sting of betrayal simmering within her friend group. She was fed up with their secretive schemes, their whispered conversations held just out of earshot. They thought she was blind to their machinations, but she felt the weight of their plans crushing down on her, like a storm cloud ready to burst.

Damon, who was supposed to be her best friend, treated her like a mere pawn in his reckless game against Klaus. His sharp barbs and careless attitude were exhausting, and each encounter left her feeling smaller, as if her worth hinged solely on her usefulness. Elena wasn’t much better—she was young and impressionable, caught in Damon’s tangled web, listening to his toxic influence instead of standing by Nicolette’s side.

But she couldn’t afford to dwell on their betrayals now; Alaric’s life hung in the balance. With every page she turned, every spell she deciphered, Nicolette clung to the hope that a more permanent solution was out there, waiting to be discovered. She would not let her friends’ choices derail her mission. She would fight for Alaric, even if it meant standing alone against the tides of friendship that seemed intent on dragging her under. The clock was ticking, and she was determined to save him—no matter the cost.

But the weight of their betrayals became unbearable, and Nicolette marched toward the Salvatore house, her heart racing with determination. She was ready to confront them, to demand answers about the way they had been treating her. However, the moment she stepped inside, her breath caught in her throat. The sight before her was straight out of a horror film: two vampires lay sprawled lifeless on the carpet, blood pooling around them, dark and ominous.

"What happened?" Nicolette exclaimed, her voice trembling with disbelief.

Elena looked up, her expression a mix of shock and grim satisfaction. "We killed Finn," she said, the words heavy with finality.

Nicolette’s mind raced. “So… Elijah…”

“Is fine,” Stefan interjected, his tone brusque. “Klaus threatened Bonnie, so she unlinked them. But we have another problem.”

A knot of fear tightened in Nicolette's stomach. “I’m scared to ask,” she said slowly, bracing herself for the answer.

Stefan took a deep breath. “When you kill an Original, their entire sire line dies with them.”

Nicolette's eyes widened, realization dawning on her. “But that means…”

“That means that if we kill Klaus, either of you could die,” Elena finished, her voice barely above a whisper.

Stefan nodded gravely. “That too. But more importantly… Esther doesn’t want to just kill her family. She wants to kill every single vampire on Earth,” Nicolette said.

The implications of their words hung in the air like a dark cloud, heavy and suffocating. Nicolette’s mind spun as she tried to grasp the enormity of their situation. Not only had they unleashed a deadly threat upon themselves, but they had also ignited a firestorm that could wipe out an entire species.

[jor-elsemissary]

Just encountered a very rare pair that I didn’t even know existed. It only has one fic on Ao3. It was okay and would fit just fine on a multiverse Earth.

But I’m one of those people that gotta figure out how to make it work in canon with as few tweaks as possible.

The rare pair?

Lois Lane and Lionel Luthor. What would that even be called? Loinel? Luthis? (I’m gonna fucking turn off autocorrect now) Luthois? Lionois?

Haha.

It’s a rabbit hole ship for sure.

But for it to work, Lionel cannot be behind the attempt on Chloe’s life. Her murder is what motivated Lois to come to Smallville in the first place and hating on Lionel Luthor, and not trusting Lex Luthor.

I think I’d have to take her line she said to him about being set up to take a fall for the attempt and actually make it a setup. *scratches head* Cause the plausibility is there and I wouldnt put it past Lex to do that in the hopes it would cement his father’s conviction.

Frankly Chloe being infected with a truth inducing gas and making Lionel confess his crime so openly is flimsy evidence and not enough to really get a conviction in a real court case. They would need Morgan Edge’s confession and evidence of sabotage/arson from a 30+ year old accident.

From what I remember, they only had the transcript from Lionel and Chloe’s conversation and she was antagonizing him, and his defense could easily make it sound like he was humoring her. The audio was destroyed after all. Lionel would not have been convicted on circumstantial evidence.

So yeah the whole attempted witness assassination quite possibly might not have been Lionel’s doing. I just find it very convenient that there was an Underground Railroad passage in that safe house and Lex finding out about the bomb.

I mean I know he sent the T-1000 assassin after her but that was not until after Lois’ visit and he realizes Chloe is not dead.

Anyway I digress.

Lois & Lionel.

No attempt to assassinate Chloe is a must for such a pairing to work.

It would be an amusing pairing to be honest. Don’t think Lionel would know what to do with Lois’ snark and sass, and whatever sarcastic pet name she would give him. She’s not like Lillian or Martha, or any of the other women he’s dealt with and dated.

Marrying Lionel is out. He’s not interested in marriage anyway and she doesn’t hedge all her bets on one horse either, even if he does have a shit ton of money and nice hair. There would most certainly be fights, no real relationship fails to have them. People do form deferring opinions after all.

She would frustrate him to no end and he’d be a glutton for it. She would be a puzzle he’d want to solve and that is how he gets hooked. He thinks he knows her type but she keeps proving him wrong.

Lois plays the dumb college girl on purpose. She’s a hellalot smarter than she lets on and he learns that quickly and early in the relationship that isn’t romantic or sexual and they’re not even sure if it’s even friendship yet.

Frenemies?

It would certainly be unrequited at first. Lois isn’t interested right off the bat, especially over a man who was acquitted for murder. She believes Chloe that he did do it and it would take a lot for her to believe otherwise. Might have to get him to open up about his childhood to her or reveal it in some way. Murder is still murder but she might be more understanding if he had done it to save himself and the money was just a means to an end.

Yep I’m going down the rabbit hole.

It would be a slow burn relationship that requires a lot of build up and work from both sides to even make it work. Lionel definitely would try his manipulative tactics on her when he’s not getting his way and she might fall for them a couple times but quickly wisens up to them.

I can see her giving him a taste of his own medicine that gives him whiplash. Is it toxic? Yes. Does it last? No. Lois, despite her bimbly portrayal in Smallville, is no pushover. She comes from his world and knows how to play that tune effectively. She just doesn’t like it because it’s not honest and she’s an honest person.

Which, I think, is one of Lionel’s attractions in women he’s serious about. Lillian and Martha were honest, and unyielding women. Lillian had the misfortune of dealing with an ambitious and ruthless, younger Lionel while Martha dealt with a more humbled older version and easily cockblocked Lillian’s older version from Earth-2.

Lois would be dealing with a Lionel in between. Still ruthless and ambitious, but his experience with the Stone of Transcendence set him on the path of humility.

Hey anyone got a light in this rabbit hole?

Would they end up together in the end? Seriously? Probably not. He’s old enough to be her father. She will want a family and the father around to raise them. Even if I were to set his age back by a decade (why people insist on making birthday-less characters the same age as the actor is beyond me), any offspring he gives her will not have him around in their late teens when it matters the most.

They would more than likely part as Lionel gets older. Barring any murderous children offing him, he’d probably let her go. Especially when she starts working for the Daily Planet. His presence would do her career no good.

This leaves her open to falling in love with Superman. Which is the Lois & Clark relationship I prefer anyway. She’s not suppose to know who Superman is until after he’s been on stage for a while. Half of her career is made by her stories on the mysterious superhero, and the other half dredging up Lex Luthor’s oil barrels from the river.

Yep rabbit hole.

[stainedglassthreads]

I think a story’s themes sometimes get downplayed in theorycrafting. And that can occasionally lead to theories that clash with the source material, whether the theory supporters realize it or not.

For a very ridiculous example that few people probably take seriously, let’s begin with the Coma Theory from the Pokemon anime. The theory is an old one, and basically states that Ash is a boy from our world, who after being electrocuted fell into a coma where he dreamed the entirety of his Pokemon adventure. The presence of real-world animals from our world appearing in early seasons, but slowly being phased out for a world inhabited solely by Pokemon, is attributed to the deterioration of his brain, as is the fact he never appears to age.

I don’t believe anyone takes this theory completely seriously or claims it to be definitive canon, though some may appreciate its creepypasta style. For one, it reduces a story to an ‘all just a dream’ narrative, which is hard to do well and easy to make feel cheap and cliched. But I’ll also point out that it’s very at-odds with the themes of the Pokemon anime. Pokemon has always had strong themes of friendship, empathy, and compassion from episode one, and claiming that all the friends who Ash meets on his journey are mere figments of his imagination feels like the exact opposite to that. As such, even though the world of Pokemon is no stranger to dark subjects such as child death, this specific theory doesn’t feel like it belongs.

For a slightly more recent, but still not especially popular, theory, there is the theory that Gaster is responsible for the Determination experiments, amalgamates, and Flowey. While there is some theory Gaster may have dabbled in dt himself a little (the two strongest pieces of evidence being the DT Extractor’s design and the mention of vague ‘blueprints’, as well as some people noticing that Mystery Man looks melted.), in-game evidence in this video by Dorked proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that Alphys was the one responsible for the Amalgamates and Flowey. Even before I saw this video, though, I thought the theory was full of crap. Why?

Well, because it would render Alphys’ arc in the game entirely moot. Her arc was about the lies she had told covering up her own mistakes, and gaining the courage to tell the truth and fix things for the amalgamates. If it were abruptly revealed that, whoopsy doopsy, it wasn’t her mistake and had instead been the mistake of some mysterious figure who everyone just so happened to forget, conveniently lifting responsibility for the initial mistakes from her shoulders and removing the origin of the guilt that prompted her lies... it would abruptly become a much, much, much weaker arc. For both Alphys and Gaster. Alphys loses much of the power behind her eventually coming forwards, while Gaster’s arc, presently left largely in the background, is dragged into the forefront to be blasted with a glaring spotlight, highlighting the lack of closure and unsatisfaction. What lessons does Gaster learn? ‘Maybe if you blow yourself into non-existence, someone else will come along, be tortured by your mistakes to the point of suicidal depression, and then eventually fix your fuck-ups’?

This isn’t exactly a widely-popular theory, though, so let’s go for a more recent and more popular one. Such as, Chara being ‘pure evil’ and responsible for the No Mercy route. A major theme in Undertale is the effects of your choices on others, how any has the choice to be a good or bad person, and how all the monsters you encounter have much deeper and more complex lives than you initially anticipate. Chara is almost certainly not a saint, but to declare that they’re pure evil with no depth, no motivation, no trauma, and no chance of redemption, who also allows the player a convenient escape from blame, is to refute basically every moral that Undertale tries to convey. Chara’s depth and complexity may not be as explicit as, say, Flowey/Asriel. But by paying attention to themes and parallels, (such as how MK’s admitting that Undyne isn’t the best person, followed by them immediately shifting idolization to Papyrus, is paralleled by Asriel, Chara, and Frisk, or Asgore remarking that Frisk reminds him of Chara only in a True Pacifist run but not mentioning humans or Chara at all in No Mercy.), one can assume that Chara was, at the very least, neither pure evil nor exclusively motivated by power when they began their plan.

I do admit, sometimes a theme can be introduced early on, only for the story to viciously tear it apart and show how it’s a deeply flawed belief. Undertale initially introduces ‘kill or be killed’, only to show two different ways that it’s a very flawed belief: in No Mercy, it shows that this belief can only end in self-destruction, while in True Pacifist the saying’s most ardent supporter is forced to acknowledge it was a flawed ideology fueled by his trauma and hurt. But the point remains.

[mesillusionssousecstasy]

THE IDOL 1x02

First of all, again the performance of Lily-Rose is beyond what I could have expected. She is just amazing in this role. 

The show could have been so much better without this nonsense and free sex scenes. If Mr Sam Levinson is so interested by sex (and not the good kind), he should be able to create a real series based on the porn industry at this point. 

I will do this review chronologically.

I don’t see any point to show Jocelyn masturbating with a glass of ice while remembering her night with Tedros. Beside again the focus on her hands. 

Regarding the shoot of the video clip: I loved the way they portrayed the singer and dancers’ exhaustion; the performance, the break down. The genuine truth behind the scene of a video clip. But it was really psychologically challenging. Again Lily was fabulous in the role. It becomes crystal clear that the record label sees Jocelyn as a product and commodity, rather than an artist with autonomy and PTSD. At the end of the day, Jocelyn’s erratic behaviour is costing them millions of dollars that they want a return on, so there can’t be any mistakes in her comeback.   Even before the shoot has started, there is already a problem. Jocelyn arrives three hours late to her music video shoot due to the make-up artists having to cover up self-inflicted wounds on her inner thighs. This gives us insight into Jocelyn’s psychological and emotional state, which highlight her turning towards self-destructive coping mechanisms as a way to deal with her anxiety and unprocessed trauma. It’s terrible to notice that once the word begins to travel on set, we see a desperate struggle between Jocelyn’s declining mental state and quest for perfection, versus the record label’s disappointment with their product not performing as intended. We finally get the perfect take, when Jocelyn performs an inspired take of her dance number, but inevitably the camera loses focus mid-way through when she did this take, and you could tell that she finally reached the level of perfection she was desperate to achieve. However, none of the footage is usable, and my heart fell to my stomach the moment they delivered the news to her. It becomes even more painful to watch when Jocelyn experiences a break from reality and calls for her mother, who was always there on set with Jocelyn before she passed. I don’t even want to speak about her bleeding feet and thighs. During all this time, Nikki is the worse of the team’s member, she is just looking for her money and nothing else, certainly not for Jocelyn at all.

Why Tania, the journalist at “Vanity Fair” is still there, on the set of the video shoot? At least, we learned that Xander used to be a singer himself. 

This leaves us with an important question to consider: what happens to a pop idol that can’t perform as needed? You may think this was a human and empathetic move from the record label executive, but remember, Nikki has already been working behind the scenes to create a new Jocelyn with Dyanne.

Surprise, a few days after, it’s revealed that Dyanne has been working with Tedros to lure Jocelyn into his cult, but what are her true motives? And what about Chloe, who is listening to each important conversation and is watching each important scene unfolding before her. 

Tedros is definitively more than a club owner. He is a crazy bastard plotting to get revenge on something (his music career’s failure?), when we get an ominous statement from him, saying that he may finally get what’s he’s owed from Dyanne once she is signed with Jocelyn’s record label.

The song “double fantasy” created by The Weeknd was perfectly played. It suited the moment, even better when the door unfolds and the car appears. 

Come on! Izaak is totally guy! His relation/seduction toward Leia is just unbelievable and beyond stupid. It’s amateurish at this point.

Nevertheless, the “orgy party” (with sex, alcohol and drugs) is definitively true, and I’m wondering if they didn’t based the scene with what was happening in the living room of the heir of “La Maison du Caviar” in Paris, avenue Foch. Because there too, there was a naked girl playing the piano and asking for cocaïne. 

Again, the reference to Prince and Donna Summer (at the end of the episode). 

Not much is known about Tedros’ past, as no one can seem to get an answer after a background check, but we do learn a bit about his past through Isaac, when Leia inquires about him throughout the night. He seems to find people who are looking to change their life, and takes advantage of their desperation. In the same episode, we learned more about Jocelyn and how she started to sing.

Abel’s interior is very dark, even in the pool area. 

Let’s talk about this terrible and unnecessary sex scene. First, Abel as a sex dominator is beyond laughable. He is not convincing at all (example: “I want to grab you by the ass while I suffocate you with my cock. I want you to choke on it.”)! Then, he was watching like a pervert and nothing else, while Jocelyn was having sex with the air surrounding her? And I didn’t understand the correlation between Tedros and Jocelyn’s intimate moment and, then suddenly pass to Izaak and Leia’s fucking. Was it necessary? Come on!  What about Chloe, watching secretly Jocelyn and Tedros’s “make out session”? She seems very important for the story, as she is an important witness of everything that’s happening around her. She looks also a bit like Jocelyn, so will she take her place too? First, her cloths, then her life? That’s in interesting character to follow, something will unfold. 

Regarding the end, Leia’s white face is still haunts me and the refrain of the song which goes like this: “That’s my family/We don’t like each other much,”

Conclusion: 1. This leads to an even bigger point of interest: Dyanne represents how the music industry is constantly looking to fill the shoes of anyone who isn’t able to perform well. They don’t care about the human behind the brand. There is always going to be someone younger, more talented and willing to do the work another person isn’t willing to do, and it was made evidently clear that Nikki doesn’t see Jocelyn as anything more than a product of the industry.

2. It seems to be as though the music industry is portrayed in the series as not caring about the artistic craft, and that the public will listen to anything and everything that is promoted as popular or important by the record label. 

3. We will have a new song from The Weeknd in the next episode, as you may hear in the promo for episode 3.

4. Tedros is as bas the music industry surrounding Jocelyn.

ps: I have even read an review mentioning, “Britney Spear’s Blackout album: that era of Britney’s career is marked by darker subject matter that plays into her real-life controversies and status as a sex symbol, which sounds remarkably similar to where we meet Jocelyn in the series.”