#while also truly not being able to say it

[jemmo]

I don’t think I’m gonna be able to put it into the right words, but I can’t tell you how happy it makes me to watch that final episode of miseinen. bc it is one thing to mention marriage in a show about two men in a country where that’s not legal; it’s one thing to mention it as an inevitable, as just a waiting game, and leave it there, just as it’s one thing to mention it as a fantasy, or as something a couple doesn’t need to prove or certify their feelings. it’s another thing to show, even for just a short 30 minute episode, what that waiting actually feels like, and the kind of feelings being in that no man’s land of wanting but not being able to have can bring up. bc i can’t think when ive ever seen a bl touch on it so explicitly, at least not off the top of my head, or at least not to the extent of dedicating a whole episode to that feeling. bc you really feel how complex and indescribable that feeling is for jin in that episode, and while it’s mixed with that still lingering fear of haruki leaving and one day suddenly not being there, you feel that it’s not just for that certainty that he wants to be married. he wants the whole package of it, because he truly loves haruki. he sees his friends have relationships and talk about marriage, he feels the pressure from his mom and the rest of the people around him to think about marriage. and that’s exactly the thing of it. it’s not just that he can’t get married, it’s the fact that he has to hide the fact he wants it, and hide his relationship altogether. it’s not simply just marriage, it fits into a wider thing of him initially accepting his queerness and now not knowing if or how he wants to share that with other people. it’s just like- i really don’t want to gush but holy fuck it’s just so excellently done. bc you feel how different it is from haruki too, and it goes back to their differences in upbringing, bc haruki, after the difficulties he’s gone through, now finds it easier to accept and share these things bc he’s never exactly had anyone that would be impacted by this, but not only does jin have people to tell, he’s also been raised to follow a very traditional path in life, the one with least resistance, which very much means marrying a woman and having children and all of that. and it’s not that he can’t accept that he won’t do that, bc we’ve seen throughout the show how he has always faced what he’s been told is right with the open mindedness to question whether it is right, or right to him. but we’ve also seen through the show that the people around him do not have that same openmindedness, it’s why he never shared his friendship with haruki with anyone and now doesn’t want to share his relationship. but what i want to stress most is that the show perfectly shows that it’s not black and white. he is not choosing not to say anything, but he’s also not forced to stay silent. you see the greyness not just bc the situation is nuanced, but also bc at the end of the day it’s a human making this decision, and a human does not simply take in inputs and output the right decision and stick by that. you see him want to say something, you see him pull back, you see him be resentful of the way things are but also learn to accept that that’s how they are at the moment. you just… you see him live through having that in his head and what it feels like on any particular day and it’s just so incredibly amazing and important to see that in a character. it feels so fucking human. and i didn’t expect to get so emotional over a special ep about marriage, esp bc ive never much cared for marriage, ive never found it necessary, but when you take the time to show that it’s what 2 characters want, dedicate a whole ep to showing it, instead of just using it as a default happy ending, well… it’s just the cherry on top to a show that’s been absolutely fucking phenomenal. i will stan this show till i die thank you very much.

[cybershock24601]

More post canon Rookanis thoughts today as I contemplate how weird their inclusion of Spite in their relationship would be to everyone. Even if Spite isn’t involved romantically they still try to make the guy feel included like they did when they ordered that extra cup of coffee on their little date in game.

Personally I feel like the Crows (especially Caterina and Illario for similar yet different reasons) would do their best to ignore the fact that Lucanis is an abomination now and has a little guy riding around shotgun at all times and that fiction works right up until Rook moves in with Lucanis and suddenly it’s a lot harder to ignore Spite.

Especially since I headcanon my watcher Rook has always been able to tell when Spite is talking even if she can’t hear what he’s saying. She’s sensitive enough to freaky fade stuff to hear something, though it took her a bit to figure out that something was Spite as his words sounds like muffled whispers from a room over where you can tell someone is talking but can’t at all make the words. So in the time between the games end and Rook moving in with Lucanis while she’s settling Watcher responsibilities and helping with the aftermath of everything that happened, she’s also working with Emmrich to hone her magical senses enough to hear Spite. It’s a good skill for a Watcher to have and it would probably be nice for Spite to be able to talk to someone else without having to highjack Lucanis’ vocal cords, also Rook’s a nosy bitch and doesn’t like not being able to hear what the third person in the room is saying because she knows Spite talks about her.

Anyways, now everyone can’t ignore Spite’s existence as rookanis set up a third place setting when sitting down for some afternoon tea and coffee and occasionally pause before replying to something no one else can hear. Or Rook suddenly giggling out of nowhere at something Spite says because she’s not nearly as good at not reacting to Spite’s unheard commentary. Creepiest of all is when someone walks into the room when Lucanis is taking the nap to find Rook and Spite playing card games together and it’s so unsettling for the people who have known Lucanis their whole life to see him with his eyes glowing and his face twisted into foreign expressions, not to mention how strange it is to hear another voice coming out of Lucanis’ mouth.

Caterina nominally ignores the whole thing but is probably looking into how to get Spite exorcised. Illario ends up in learning things about Lucanis that he never knew as Spite is more willing to air Lucanis’ grievances in their relationship which ends up giving Illario a new perspective on a lot of things in their past and possibly leads to Lucanis and Illario having a truly honest and emotionally open talk for the first time in their entire lives. Teia treats Spite cautiously at first but ends up viewing him like some sort carnival side show where yes Spite unnerves her but the little guys actually really funny, and unlike everyone else, it’s Spite that ignores Viago because his protectiveness over Lucanis has manifested in snubbing Viago in return for hurting Lucanis’ feelings all those years ago when he ignored Lucanis’ affections. Very funny if this is how Viago realizes the knife was actually Lucanis’ way of flirting and not some sort of indirect threat. Teia and Rook are absolutely cracking up while this happens due to the absurdity of the situation.

[wisteria-lodge]

About the gender in hp thing: I know JKR wrote the books wanting the patriarchy to have minimal impact on the world but even through a couple of the metas you wrote you can see that that’s not the case. In your character crying post there’s a clear implication that showing that kind of emotion is a weakness but also that it is not masculine. Equating strength with masculinity is foundational for cultures with strong patriarchies, and this idea infests every other aspect of their lives. Idk because of that and many other reasons I have a very hard time of writing the wizarding world as anything other than a patriarchy

This is a watsonian analysis vs doylist analysis issue.

I 100% do think that JKR went out of her way to really, really downplay the importance of gender in her worldbuilding - and this contributes a lot to the specific feel of the world. You could genderflip, idk. Neville. Snape. Draco. Hermione. McGonagall. and almost no plot elements or character dynamics would change. (Maybe James would bully Severus slightly differently? Idk. He honestly might not.)

Compare HP to something like His Dark Materials, another British fantasy series released at the same time, marketed to the same demographic... in which gender politics are REALLY important. Lyra conforming or not conforming to specific gender norms hugely impacts the way a lot of other characters treat her. So much of Mrs. Coulter's character has to do with how she's navigated the back ways and side avenues into power, because the patriarchy that runs *that* world is extremely explicit and plot relevant, and there's a lot she just can't do.

Now is JKR *good* at writing a gender-blind world? Not really no. So she's stripped out the importance of gender in a fairly surface way, while leaving evidence of the foundations intact. Everyone's a het couple, women take the husband's last name, Molly and Petunia are at home while their husbands work and there's no inverse of that situation, Fleur's father walks her down the aisle at her wedding, it's important that Hermione be able to tame her hair when she wants to, but for Harry it doesn't matter...

There is ALSO the narrative voice poking through and putting its own spin on everything. This is where we start getting judgment (for example) directed both at girls who are too feminine, and at girls who aren't feminine enough. Or sexual assault not really "sticking" if it's directed at boys. We don't have a character talking, in-universe, about how it's wrong for a woman not to want children. We just have a book where the only women who don't have kids (or take care of kids) are villains. Same thing with masculinity = strength = no crying. That's something the narrative framing / bias of the author brings to the table, but it's kept out of the mechanics of the magical world. I guess you could say Harry and Draco equate crying/fainting with weakness (but not explicitly anti-masculinity)... but then Lupin goes out of his way to separate 'fainting' from 'weakness' anyway.

Interestingly, gender is much more baked into the muggle worldbuilding. (Part of why I think leaving that aspect out of the wizarding world was a deliberate choice.) Smeltings is an all-boys school, so is St Brutus.' Dudley teases Harry about his "boyfriend" Cedric, Vernon sizes up Arthur and Mad-Eye by how masculine they are. At the beginning of Book 4, Dudley's diet is this very gendered conflict between Vernon and Petunia, where Vernon doesn't want a "little nancy boy for a son" - and that is one of the only truly gendered insults in the whole series. "Crybaby" almost counts... but the Slytherins tease Hermione for crying too, so idk. They tend to go for pretty gender-neutral insults, like "poor" "unimportant parents" "looks like a chipmunk" ... etc.

Like... I'm trying to imagine a scene were Lucius lays into Draco for not being masculine enough, and I can't. I think that in a canon-compliant fic, a scene like that would feel odd. The conflict would need to be framed more like a "you disgrace the name of Malfoy with your weakness" or "never tell anyone outside the family what you're thinking" or "your believe yourself to be more intelligent than you truly are." Not "you need to man up."

[ppnuggiexxx]

-> kiss prompt || whb

• character :: naberius

• wanting a kiss

        it wasnt always easy being in abyssos ,, after all any time you appeared so did beelzebub magically . it was like he could predict whenever you came ,, or was secretly stalking you . well ,, there was this sudden buzzing that happened not too long ago but you didnt think too much of it . least to say ,, bael was more than ecstatic at your appearance . you did help the overworked devil with some of his workload ,, and provided decent company .

you could sympathize for him ,, after all having stolas with a short temper so often and naberius turning into dog form often must've been difficult to deal with . though amon tells you it happens often enough it shouldnt be too hard ,, you still feel sympathy for bael . he truly needed a vacation ,, but it seemed like it would be eternity before that happened .

being hounded down by Beelzebub every day you spent there was also not the greatest . he was nice and all ,, but it got boring being pestered about handing off any unwashed clothing or underwear to him ,, offering to take it off your hands with a wink . and on top of it ,, he would offer left and right to show you different spots in his country . you'd be glad to indulge if most of them didnt include an orgy or a club ,, though you did tag along once when he said he was going to a bakery .

however ,, due to being so occupied with the king and bael ,, you hadnt been able to spend time with the one devil you came to avisos for specifically . with the way he pouted in the corner of your eye you could tell he knew too . you'd promised naberius you'd spend time with him ,, and thus the trip to abyssos was made . yet the moment you arrived you had your attention stolen away .

thankfully at night the devils understood that you were human and needed some rest after such a long day . and with this newfound free time you could spend it with your beloved . making your way down the hallways ,, you knocked on the door to naberius's room ,, waiting until he acknowledged you . " come in !" the devil shouted ,, and you opened the door . he perked up at your presence ,, already changed for bed and a few documents spread out over his desk in the corner .

        " how've you been ?" you asked ,, making your way towards him . he seemed tense with how much more work he's been given ,, his body relaxing the moment your hands reached his cheeks . " could be better ,, and you ? i know being dragged by his majesty everywhere isnt easy ." his eyes scanned your features ,, looking for any discomfort .

        " better now that im here witu you ,," you smiled at him ,, and his eyes lit up slightly . you pressed your lips to his ,, savoring the soft kiss . his lips felt softer than usual ,, even his skin was softer in your hands . his own hand grabbed the back of your head ,, pulling you closer than possible and deepening the kiss . it'd been a while since you two could even be this sort of intimate ,, let alone hold hands in the presence of others . you both had been busy with beelzebub's sudden appearance and the workload that came with it .

        it felt nice being able to be together alone .

[nemesis-writer]

Wheels on the Bus

Masterlist TW: None...

I'm just looking out the window and it's cold outside There are two boys yelling behind me and I'm terrified Counting trees as they pass me by And I'm trying not to look across the aisle 'Cause Maya's letting Dan put his hand up her skirt And she's got her hand down his pants

I'm finally in college and finally finished with living in the Wayne mansion.

I get to make my own choices without being judged for the first time in my life. Everyone insulted me and despised me for my new found freedom but I didn't mind. I was able to make a few good friends on the way, but I had to leave Gotham.

I know the driver sees it I know he's peeking in the rearview mirror He says nothing Trying to ignore it, it's fucking boring I'm quietly observing‚ I'm saying nothing

I'm excited for NYC!!!!

I always wanted to explore the world outside of a dark and gloomy Gotham. It's truly exciting and I can't wait for my first day.

Nothing much to really talk about but it's great to escape the demons that entrapped me in hell.

No one's watching us‚ don't give a fuck Wheels on the bus I'm holding it down up in the front Wheels on the bus Ooh‚ ooh, ooh Wheels on the bus

But when I entered the bus all I could smell was smoke and some other foul odors I couldn't name. Everyone was joshing around while I sat alone in my headset ignoring all of my surroundings.

"Hi, I'm Irene." A kind girl greeted me. She looked dorky, but an adorable kind of dorky.

"Y/N." I say as I extend my hand to shake.

She sat down and shook it. It's normal for me to not be identified as a Wayne and also kind of nice to know that no one wants to be my friend for my name.

Now, I'ma light it up and pass it Puff‚ puff and pass it Don't be a dick and babysit, c'mon, just pass it over here Counting cars as they pass me by And I'm trying not to look a row behind me 'Cause Jason's got his ass on the glass And I hate him‚ driver hit a bump fast

I love it here. I'm gonna wait till we get to school and then report about it at night!

Taglist

@lunayaps, @not-aya, @iluvcatzz, @vanessa-boo, @ivyrose9194,@thesehandsarerated-e, @eyeless-kun, @errorunfound1, @gwyneveire, @alishii, @cxcillia

[g1rld1ary]

lifeguard!james potter x reader 6

wc: 1785

cw: r thirsting over james, someone almost drowns (but doesn't)

me: i have a bunch of lockwood requests in the drafts and yet this is all I've been able to write lately... if anyone has any lifeguard!james requests pleaseeee send them over bc he is my favourite boy <3 ALSO just realised the last part was posted in AUGUST!! no wonder i wrote this so fast i have been missing him!!!!!

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

it was stupidly hot. you weren’t usually one to complain about warm weather given england got so little, but the whole summer had been one big heatwave and it was becoming a little overwhelming. english girls weren’t made for the heat!

still, at least you had the public pool to make up for the sweltering sun, and that same underfunded public pool brought you james, so maybe everything did happen for a reason.

that brought you to the present moment, lounging on a sun chair, feeling the tan appear on your skin. lily was next to you flicking through a magazine you’d brought her from the supermarket and you were enjoying the sight of james in all his glory on duty.

you really needed to ask yourself why you could stare at him for hours doing, quite literally, nothing. you’d already seen him up in his chair plenty of times, observing the water below him, flirting with you, passing the time. and yet every time he was on shift you noticed something new. a new muscle that tantalised you, a new spot of highlight that glittered under the sun. james was simultaneously an enigma you chipped away at every day and an open book you didn’t need to; it was maddening.

you were torn from your daydreams by the lifeguard whistle piercing the air. you propped yourself up with a start, deadly curious as to what could have happened. in all your years coming to the same pool, you didn’t think you’d ever heard the whistle sound so aggressively. the most dangerous thing that had ever happened there was a few kids running around when the sign on the gate specifically prohibited it.

and yet, there was a little girl, flailing around because one of her armband floaties had popped and she was simultaneously being dragged under while one arm was stuck on the surface. you and lily watched on in horror as she struggled, hand over your mouths and reading material long forgotten.

luckily, james was onto it. in one surprisingly graceful dive, he was in the water, shooting across the pool to where the girl was struggling, all the witnesses frozen in shock or fear. he was there in an instant, scooping the girl up and bringing her to the side of the pool, hoisting her up to sit on the edge. when they were both on dry land, your surprise was doubled to see the girl was tiny, maybe five at the oldest.

james sat with her on the edge of the pool as she coughed and spluttered and spat out a bit of water, then walked her over to the tiny medical room on the edge of the facility. stillness and silence weighed over the pool for a moment before a few kids resumed their game of marco polo and life returned to normal.

“i know it’s awful that something could have happened to that girl, but now she’s safe am i wrong in saying that was super hot?” you asked lily and furrowed your brow when she laughed.

“you are so gone,” she shook her head with a smile, “but you’re not necessarily wrong.” in your defence, if you were looking strictly at james and not at the surrounding scenario, it was a pretty spectacular display. despite all his muscles, of which there were many, james was apparently light on his feet, making a dive even the olympians would respect, muscles shifting under his skin as his arms raised above his head. and then when he came up for oxygen, curls flying through the air as he shook the water off him and sparkling chlorine droplets adorned his skin. he truly looked godly; not of the same universe that everyone around you was created in.

plus, of course he was good with kids. as if that didn’t make your ovaries want to explode. james was so gentle with the little girl, rubbing her back as she got the water out of her lungs and holding her little hand as they plodded down to the medical room.

you went back to daydreaming under the sun fuelled by the new experiences you’d had, images of james and his muscles doing all sorts of nasty, delightful things. you were blissfully tanning until the squawking, rage-filled voice of an adult woman pierced through your ears up to your brain. had anyone seen her daughter? five years old, small, brown hair, pink swimsuit? you propped yourself up on your arms to watch the commotion, cringing silently as old hilda glowered, reluctantly explaining the situation.

it felt like the whole pool was silently waiting as james and the little girl emerged from inside the medical room. and while the girl waddled across to her mother like a puddle of sunshine, james was the grey cloud hovering over her.

you watched with keen interest as james and the girl’s mother engaged in a very heated discussion you couldn’t quite hear, all flailing arms and stern glares. you took advantage of the moment of his distraction, admiring the way his brow hardened as he got angry, something you’d never seen before. the glitter in his eyes was no longer mischief but rage, and his jaw clenched and unclenched like it was the only thing keeping him from yelling. maybe it was. while the whole situation was obviously very scary and tragic, your thighs were clenched for dear life as you watched the veins in his arms appear while his fists clenched. you were not going to tell lily what you were imagining about james’ hands but you were sure she could already tell.

the spat ended with the woman turning on her heel and dragging her daughter out of the facility as james stared them down, anger still radiating off of him. he stood aimlessly for a few moments and you got the impression he didn’t know what to do with all the angry energy he’d amassed. and while you had a couple of ideas, you figured hilda probably wouldn’t appreciate it on the ancient pool tiles. groaning softly, you swung yourself up and out of the plastic sun lounger, treading lightly towards him.

“hey there, baywatch. think it’s time for your lunch break yet?” james broke from his reverie to look at you, frustration still evident on his features.

“that was so — she was so —” he paused for a moment to self-soothe, “yeah, i think a break is a good idea.”

“okay,” you laughed a little, taking james’ cap off his head and putting it on your own, “you go sit with lily for a bit and i’ll be right back.” with that you took off out of the pool grounds, legging it to the supermarket down the street. nothing worth having was ever cold at the dismal pool bar.

you returned only a few minutes later with drinks in hand, approaching lily and james from behind. you could tell from their impassioned gestures they were still rehashing the earlier situation.

“an angel returns,” you announced in a sing-song voice, setting your hands on james’ shoulders. he looked up at you, visibly relaxing as he smiled. you couldn’t help but return it.

lily got the first choice of the three different beverages you’d chosen as you knew james would never complain. she took the iced tea while james chose a coca cola, leaving you with the lemonade. james reached forward to take the can as you came to sit on the edge of his lounger but you wagged your finger, cracking the top open and taking a sip.

“favour tax,” you explained, handing the drink over with a grin. james stumbled over his words as he took it, settling on just taking a sip to avoid having to come up with something witty. you hoped the red in his cheeks wasn’t just sunburn.

“so do you wanna keep talking it out or shall we distract you with our theatrics?” lily asked, clipping her hair up and off the back of her neck. james thought for a moment, head tilted to the side like a puppy.

“entertain me,” he commanded in good humour, “if i keep talking about it i’ll just stay angry all day, and who’d waste a day like that when accompanied by two beautiful ladies?” you and lily both rolled your eyes at his playful flirting, carrying on a conversation you’d started earlier in the day about neighbourhood gossip.

james’ shift ended just before sunset, when orange was just beginning to paint the sky. lily had left a half-hour earlier on household dinner duty, but you had nothing to do and knew james would be off soon enough.

you wandered down the town’s streets together, only half dressed from a day at the pool and admiring the multicoloured sunset.

“y’know everyone’ll really love you now, if they didn’t already,” you said, kicking a rock unfortunate enough to cross paths with you, “i mean, saving a little girl from drowning? that’s overachieving, even for you.” you studied james’ reaction, making sure it wasn’t too soon and you weren’t crossing lines. james, ever the ray of sunshine, just laughed heartily.

“what can i say? new kid in town has to make a good impression, especially when there are always such pretty girls hanging around to watch me on duty.”

“and who would those pretty girls be?” you asked with faux-innocence, looking up at james through your eyelashes. he looked at you as if to say you know, but then retorted anyway.

“hilda and edith are quite the silver foxes, don’t you think?”

“sure!” you laughed, “if you like wrinkly boobs down to your hips.”

“as opposed to yours!” james retaliated instantly, the widening of his eyes making it abundantly clear that he had not thought it through, but you weren’t letting him go that easily.

“which are…” you prompted, satisfied when james’ hazel eyes began flicking between your eyes and your bikini-clad chest, almost as if he couldn’t control it.

“which are… great! good? perfect? please let me stop talking,” he begged, only serving to make you giggle.

“come on, baywatch, let’s get you home. you’ve had a big day.”

“you know, sometimes i think you might even have a heart in there somewhere, pretty girl.” james slung an arm around your shoulder and you faltered under his weight, the two of you stumbling home in a mass of limbs and laughter.

would just like to clarify that there is nothing wrong with wrinkly boobs down to ur hips! all boobs r good boobs <3

[34saveme34]

me when I read a fanfic and it isn't the not being able to keep one tense going through the fic that puts me off for a second but the idea that 3 doesn't know he has feelings for 4

I honestly think he knows he likes 4 since about

hm. I'll say when he was exiled

I think he had time to think

yknow, despite all that happened before, you'd think that he would hold more against 4 but he doessnnn'tttttttttt

and I knoooow the meme life cicle but I think he was still very casual about it despite that

I think he realised then and overtime like thought it went away

and then 4 appeared again and thought he was fine, he was good

but then he gets to figure out he's basically 4's soulmate and it least now a lot of things start to make sense but not others and he's all over it again

for 4 it's IGBP 100% but only after a while

like he's throught he shock

maybe after all the annoyance with his living situation and he finally lives in his fuckin- don't remember the name of it but he settles down in the back to relax and his mind drifts back, thinks about 3 a little too much, the words he said still burning on his mind and it makes him so giddy and then it hits him like oh- oh huh, guess a lot of things make sense now. better repress!

I mean just- just think about it

neither of these idiots are brave enough to say anything like that, they're both scared of being vulnerable but 3 is more so. BUT 4 is way way more scared of rejection than 3 is. I mean they're basically the same amount of scared but from different perspectives. Like they see themselves this way is why I'm phrasing it this way, 4 is scared to be vulnerable like that too but he specifically thinks about the idea of 3 forever rejecting him and losing him all over this.

3 is also heavy scared of rejection but he's more scared of the idea that if he doesn't keep up his tough persona and tells 4 how he feels he'll be made fun of forever and no one will take him seriously ever again, not even as little as they already do, at least in his eyes.

then again I do absolutely think wotfi23 was a step forward from this

with 4 not trying to snoop around so hard to find out what 3 thinks, and 3 having less of a high wall up around 4, especially since 3 was drawing them not only in that specific art style but also with like.... the expressions are so specific. I do think 4 brings 3 a lot of joy, something that should be explored more

because got theough.... yknow what fuck it I'm overanalyizing that drawing, lemme put it here first

so like this piece of shit drawing <3

one thing first and this is gonna sound insane first but 4 takes up more place

and also has a more complex albeit not by that much pose

also his pose exudes energy, also with the face he makes as well

I think this is how 3 truly sees 4, like a bundle of sunshine who is full of unneeded energy

another interesting thing you might notice is 3's corner of his mouth

that little line by his beard.... he's cringing a little bit, almost like he's trying to mask enjoying 4's company. And in general, his eyes too and once again back to his posture and how he takes up less space than 4 it feels like he's holding back. Once again back to him being kind of intimacy. And when he tries to reach out it hurts him, he cringes and he's like fuming and crazy about it

WHILE he views 4 as being more open, more fun than him, more jolly than he'll ever be

it's crazy how jealously he is in love still despite everything

and we didn't quite see development from this

he loves him so much and still envies what he has with his whole soul

maybe one day the love will overtake the jealousy, especially with how 4 is like, slowly and slowly being more open (and a lil gay) about caring about 3

unless it's a one step forward one step backward type of thing

like imagine first episode of the year and we witness them step backward from a better and more truthful relationship they could have

because honestly, it isn't only about love. It's about communication issues, greatest example of that being Trash Friends of course (oh trash friends, how I miss watching you for the first time)

and it would be genuinely so genius if they, with 4's development about dropping more hints about just how much he thinks about 3

like being vulnerable

and if it was used against him OOOOOOH it would the BIGGEST step backward

if 3 let jealousy win while 4 is trying to be vulnerable with him

imagine the fall out. imagine 3 breaking, being like maybe 4 was right, maybe I really only think of myself

while 4 fully closing off, hurt

their relationship is SO conflict prone. which is why it's so fun to talk about, like why I've been rambling here for a long while now oops

I was reading a fanfic before I almost forgot 💀 anyways I do believe in 4 realising his feelings for 3 later than 3 does for 4, I think that's probably the more popular opinion in the fandom

might make a poll aboutt ittttt :3

[the-sea-called-history02]

How Stray Kids say “I love you” without saying it (maknae line)

Genre: fluff

Warnings: slight cursing

Han Jisung

Adds your favorite songs to his playlists

Music isn’t just this man’s love language. It’s his every language. It’s the oxygen he breaths and the water he drinks. In his mind, your favorite songs are a piece of your soul that he can carry with him no matter where he goes, so he adds your favorite songs to all of his playlists, and will never once hesitate to point that out to anyone in the vicinity. The boys have learned all the words at this point because of how often he plays the songs that remind him of you for them.

Just flat-out says it

Before anyone says that this is a lazy cop-out, just hear me out. Sweet Hannie wouldn’t know subtlety if it walked up to him with a name tag and slapped him upside the face. He wears his whole heart on his sleeve, so I really, truly believe that he wouldn’t be one to let his actions speak louder than his words. Both are equally important in his eyes, so please don’t get annoyed when every other thing out of his mouth is how much he loves you. He’s only a tad obsessed, I promise.

Felix Lee

Cooks with you

Sure, Lix can bake, but have you seen him try to cook? It’s not pretty, but he always has a blast trying, especially when it’s with you. Whether you’re a five star Michelin or burn water, you’re going to create some sort of mess when you two get together. No matter how it turns out, though, Felix will make himself enjoy every bite because it “was made with love.”

Sends you a million TikToks

It could be memes, sad videos, songs he thinks you’ll like, things about your hobbies, prepared to be bombarded with little videos from Felix 24/7. He shares them so you know he’s thinking of you, and it fills him with way too much joy when you find them as entertaining as he does. It just further convinces him that you’re soulmates, and who’s to say he’s wrong?

Kim Seungmin

Writes about you in his journal

His journal is an extension of himself, and is how he processes his insanely hectic life, but he always finds that writing about you feels different. He never has to think about what he’s writing, and the words just flow onto the page. If you manage to catch him in a particularly mushy mood, he might even let you read some of it.

Keeps a nightly routine with you

Ending his day with you is the highlight of it. He can’t wait to take his makeup off while telling you all the dumb shit the boys did that day. On tour, he’ll coordinate a time for you to do it all on FaceTime. Every step, from changing into pajamas to doing face masks, he loves knowing that, no matter how awful his day might have been, he will always be able to bear it because you would be there at the end to make it all worth it.

Yang Jeongin

Coordinates outfits

Listen, to Jeongin, being buck-naked is better than even considering not matching with you. No matter whether you’re even on the same continent, you better bet your best britches that he’ll be checking to make sure you AT LEAST have your couples bracelet on. He also definitely has a Pinterest board of couple outfit ideas.

Compares your hands

No matter how many times he does it, his heart still flutters a bit every time he sees your hands being engulfed by his. Not only is it an excuse to touch his favorite person, but it makes him feel like, in a small way, he can shelter you from the crazy world he lives in, and what kind of monster would you have to be to deny your sweet boy of that?

[urautismdiagnosis]

Ships hehe

BOATS (ships)

OK SO I won't tolerate anyone trashing aro ace people or queer platonic relationships or invalidating them, THAT OUT OF THE WAY TIME FOR HEADCANONSSS

barnacles and kwazii 🐻‍❄️💛🐱: I originally shipped them when I was like 12 lol

To me they're going to become a QPR and they mean the world to me.

I need to start actually posting my stories to showcase what's gonna happen BUT CMON GUYS THEY HAD AN ENTIRE EPISODE ABOUT THEM BEING A SYMBIOTIC RELATIONSHIP?!

Like I'm gonna be so real they were octopod POD mates. (Their rooms in the same bubble lol)

Kwazii is his ✨first mate✨

They're a married couple that doesn't realize it yet!I'm going to trauma bond them and no one can stop me. Cuz I've already done it 😎👍✨

They deeply trust eachother! I'm going to make barnacles hold what he thinks is kwazii dead in his arms! Barnacles loves this silly cat man! Kwazii loves to be appreciated and make barnacles proud! They emotionally support eachother! Kwazii is going to have nightmares about the captain dying in a horrific way that totally doesn't relate to the intens epsychological trauma I've given him! Barnacles wants to be useful and have someone to love but also someone to tell him its ok and that he doesn't have to be perfect or brave all the time! Kwazii wants to not be alone and prove himself to someone who truly sees the worth in him while being able to trust that they'd always stay loyal together! They have so many inside jokes and shared moments of near death experiences! Accordian music and shanties!

anyways onto SHELLINGTON AND DASHI AY AY AY AYYYY

Uhhh so I haven't posted their designs and my headcanons but yes Shellington is autistic to me (totally not me projecting but yall see the username. Ill get into why I think he's autistic on my character design post for him) and yes I think yk what? Maybe he was a little lonely and weird as a kid and yk what also? Maybe he does have some chronic pain too I dont make the rules (yes I do)

Anyways like shellington, I'm giving my baby issues and fears relating to not being like part of the group lol. Subconsciously anyways. And yk he found his people, the octonauts who value him and his interests and dont blame him for messing up lol and he likes himself as a person

(BTW he wouls totally try to adopt a cryptid like creature (new species!) abomination and name it Steve I already have an entire plot)

Do yall remember when they were sent to spend several weeks alone together in the midnight zone cuz I do

Regardless i think dashi just casually asked him ayyo wanna date and then he bluescreened LOL

As for dashi well, I'll get into her headcanons when I post her character design as well, but regardless she needs someone who understands and supports her passions without judgement yk?

She is so incredible,like photography, computer specialist, apparently technically a scientist, a surfer, able to pilot deep marine vehicles, got swallowed by a whale, did a flip from the manta ray while diving FRKM SEVERAL METWRS IN THE AIR INTO WAYER THAT WAS ABOUT TO HAVE LAVA POUR INTO IT???, and is a whole pilot now apaprently???

Like holy-

Anyways yeah dashi thinks shellington is an amazing single father with so much kindness and emotional intelligence and many many charming qualities 🥰

Shellington thinks dashi is Like actually a really really awesome person??? Like they both like organizing things!! Shes funny and smart!! They can both talk about eachothers interests and he likes to make her happy!! She's really cool and kind and helps him with stuff and she's super intelligent and charming! He just thinks she's oh so very cool. She's so confident and has kind eyes 🥰

Anyways yes

Btw just wanna say that tweak is like if u were aro ace to the max lolll shes just content with her life and friends lol

now for the penguin(s) in the room

ok so shes gonna be a plot relevant character in a story I've got in the works (The Oil RIg) it'll be a fun ride dw, but we love medic x depressed woman its great and yes I do think peso could pull any gal just by existing like straight up fight me on this fight me fIGHT ME-

ok not fight I'm not like that but I will stand on this hill till I die

but fr tho it was a whole telenovellahow they met omg- I'm talking the drama- thelore- thesoftmoments and the heartbreaking goodbyes- not to worry tho they do meet again and are like long distance(with tons of visiting) lol they have a very healthy relationship tho considering that shes like idk, ig fresh out of a like, very unhealthy environment

i ain't gonna spoil anything rn tho lol but she Gon save his life and he gon save hers and its gonna be beautiful<3 <3 <#

[a-most-beloved-fool]

If Spock and Jim merged into one being (no euphemism here lol) like Tuvix, what do you think the personality of the new being would be like? What impact do you think that would have had on the lives of both of them after they separated again? I love your headcanons, thanks for the answers!

thanks for the question!! <3

Hmmm... I think they would work pretty well as one being, actually. I'm thinking about all of those quotes from Roddenberry about how Kirk and Spock were supposed to represent two halves of a whole person, so I have to assume that they would be quite content. Though, disclaimer as I continue: I have not yet seen any of Voyager - there might be aspects of Tuvix's combination that I don't take into account because I don't know they exist. If so, uh, sorry. My bad.

For the sake of avoiding confusion, I'll call the merge Kirok (after the name Kirk chose when he lost his memories in The Paradise Syndrome). (Also, I fear that calling him "Kock" would have... deleterious effects on the readability of this post... for no reason at all...)

I do think that Kirok would, overall, have the best parts of Kirk and Spock. Combined, they are tactically fearsome. With Kirk's intuition and understanding of people and Spock's knowledge of statistics and science, Kirok is brilliant. However, I do think that Kirok would be a worse captain in practice than if Kirk and Spock simply had a mental bond. Part of the brilliance of Kirk and Spock as a command team is that, while they very much respect one another and take the other's opinion into account, they do also. regularly ignore each other's advice. And this is usually to their benefit! They each take risks that the other wouldn't, and, often, it saves them (in part because they always back each other up, even when doing things they don't agree with. Spock will be like "this is unwise" and Kirk will say "maybe, but I'm doing it anyways" and Spock will just... go with it.). But, if they were one person, I think that impulsiveness would be tempered. The Kirk part would have a brilliant idea, the Spock part would say "wait, there is too much risk, we can make a better plan," and then Kirok would lose his chance to act. When they're separate people Spock is ride-or-die for all of Kirk's decisions, but when they're one person, the Spock half won't always allow those decisions to be made at all (and also won't necessarily be able to tell when he does need to rein things in a bit). (Also Kirk and Spock both tend to be reckless, and then rely on the other to save them - as Kirok, who would back him up when he needed it? Bones would, but he's a medical officer. He simply can't do everything they would have. And, no matter how good of a first officer Kirok got (probably Sulu?), they couldn't be that good.)

I also think that Kirok wouldn't be quite as at ease with his position on the ship as Spock and Kirk individually were. The Spock part of him loves science far too much to just abandon it. He wants to spend time in the labs! He wants to make discoveries! Likewise the Kirk part of him can't truly be anything but a Captain. So, Kirok stays a captain, but he's less passionate about it (or, rather, more passionate about things that aren't it). This doesn't actually affect Kirok's satisfaction - it just affects his performance and relationships with others. He might spend off-duty time working on science experiments (which he can no longer do during shift, due to captaining) and neglect forming bonds with his crew, and he might place more focus than usual on scientific discovery missions.

As for the crew... Well, it's not as weird of a change as they expected. As expected, Kirok is less outwardly friendly than Kirk, and more outwardly friendly than Spock, but he's - cohesive. He still feels like their commanding officers. His humor tends to be a bit drier than Kirk's was, but he's a very compassionate and reasonable captain. (Tbh I tend to think that Kirk is actually more of a hardass than Spock (people just assume Spock is worse due to being Vulcan), so some crewmembers are surprised when Kirok is more lenient about certain things than Kirk would have been. Not lenient about cruelty or anything genuinely important to the safety of the ship, but about other things.) But, he's still not as good at making personal connections as Kirk was, and he's still inclined to spend too much time in the labs, so things aren't perfect.

Really, I think that the person having the worst time of things would be Bones, lmao. He'd have to deal with his Best Friend suddenly being the same person as The Guy He Affectionately Antagonizes (totally not a friend no how could you even think that). I think he'd be more lost than anyone else about how to address Kirok. Is this Kirk, his old friend, who he can be truly comfortable with, or is this Spock, who he snipes at and who snipes at him in turn? Who can he turn to, when the man he normally approaches for comfort is now the same being as one he doesn't want to seem too weak in front of? Does he turn to anyone else, in the meantime, or does he weather it alone?

Kirok himself, though, is actually pretty okay with the change. The different parts of himself simply - mesh well together. It's very satisfying for him, if not for his career and those around him. There's some minor bits of tension, especially regarding changes in biology and telepathic status, but, for the most part, he's doing well. The things you might expect to be major points of tension somehow... aren't. They compromise remarkably easily. (No meat, yes logic, no emotional suppression, yes casual touching, no casual relationships, yes meditation, etc.) And the Kirk and Spock parts of him both enjoy the closeness, the sense of knowing they now have for one another. They're one person, and know themself completely as they've always longed to know each other completely. (he does miss playing chess against someone who could beat him, though!)

Now, because I am Spirk-brained, I also think there's potential for Kirok to have Very Confused Feelings about discovering that the two parts of himself each had secret feelings for the other prior to the merge. There could be this odd sense of loss - like, yes, they are now technically one with one another, but they also completely missed out on their shot at a romantic relationship. They mourn what they could have had. The Spock part, especially, mourns the potentially for a telepathic bond (because with how smoothly they've integrated with one another, it surely would have been a strong one). So, as much as Kirok does enjoy existing as Kirok, I think he might be more willing to attempt separating back into two parts than I believe Tuvix was.

And, when they're two separate people again, they both feel like they're missing some part of themself, even once they've begun their new romantic relationship - but quickly discover that a mental link between them fills that hole. (And then, of course, because they are hopeless and in love, the "medicinal mental link" very quickly just becomes a marriage bond. They're like "well, we've already been one person and liked that well enough... a marriage bond is hardly anything different!" To Spock's endless pleasure, they are highly compatible and have a remarkably strong bond.) The mental link also allows them to have the same quick reaction times and combined brilliance of Kirok without the negative side effects of their own individual strengths being tempered. (they're also like. annoyingly codependent for a bit after Kirok's separation. oh boy are they always touching. "it gives them emotional security." bones looks at them in disgust (he loves it).)

Or, if we wanted to be McSpirk-brained... I'm enjoying the imagery of Kirok (who both had crushes on Bones as well as on one another) just directing all of that missed romantic potential onto Bones, who is... like, he's not not into it (Kirk was hot, Spock was hot, ergo Kirok is hot), but he also misses and loved his Original friends, and so he is very torn between accepting Kirok's advances and trying to find a way to split them apart again. (Flustered Bones, flustered Bones!! I do love flustered Bones!! He is blushing and stammering and having multiple ethical crises all at once. They never covered this in Starfleet Medical...) He also doesn't quite know whether Kirok's feelings truly belonged to both Kirk and Spock or not, and doesn't think that Kirk or Spock would truly act on it if they were in their normal state, so a small selfish part of him wonders if that's the only chance he has to be with them (even if it's not quite the same 'them' he fell in love with). And then, of course, there's the fear that trying to get back the original Kirk and Spock will actually just kill them! Yeah, poor Bones has a rough time of things. But, when everything is fixed, he does still wind up getting two boyfriends out of it. It all works out in the end?

[guarddog-of-proendos]

Image descriptions

- written by a visually impaired person

What is an image description?

an image description is exactly what it sounds like, a block of text describing the content of an image. this is important for many people but especially for blind and visually impaired people who cannot see the image (at least, not well enough to understand what's going on)

(people also cite that this helps people with slow internet, if you add that to this post I am hitting you on the head with a stick. our access to the internet is enough of a reason to add image descriptions, they don't have to help abled people as well.)

image descriptions serve the purpose of providing the same access to content and context in a post that you, a sighted person, have. the goal is to allow equal access for visually disabled people and other people who struggle to access images.

have you ever been stuck scrolling through Tumblr while images are refusing to load? was that frustrating? imagine how we feel every day, all the time.

How to write an image description

writing an image description is a skill. it's okay if you aren't great at it at first. not being great at it is not an excuse to not try. I'm tired of people telling me they can't be assed to try writing an image description because it might not be perfect. I would much rather read an imperfect image description than have no image description at all.

when you're describing an image the key point is to describe what's relevant, what you look at in an image. if the image is a tweet, describe what the tweet says. if the image is a picrew of an alter, describe what that alter looks like in the picrew.

You don't need to include every detail

a lot of guides will, with well intentions, tell you to describe a lot. sometimes, describing a lot is relevant. if you're describing a piece of art or photography then describing a lot is important because the point of the photo is to appreciate all of the photo. if you're taking a selfie, I truly do not care that your walls are blank and white. sometimes, more detail is less accessible. I don't want to scroll through paragraphs up on paragraphs for a photo that sighted people can just glance at and get the gist of.

take for example, this post divider I just used:

you could describe this as: a post divider with a large star in the center surrounded by a halo of the moon phase in gold. 2 horizontal lines come from it in the center with a pattern of alternating sun, moon, sun, and star symbols.

... that's really long. the point for sighted people is to break up the text with something pretty. it's not to admire all the intricacies of the image.

a more appropriate description would be: a star themed post divider

text, on the other hand, should always be transcribed in full. do not describe your DNI banner as "a DNI banner" that tells me nothing. put down all the text, all of it, because all of the text is relevant.

never use AI to write an image description! it's insulting and often inaccurate. problems with generative AI aside, throwing an image into chatGPT and then copy and pasting the sludge it spits out makes me feel like I'm not worth taking a minute to actually write an image description. AI generated image descriptions tend to be impersonal, inaccurate, and hard to follow because it just throws up all the random details it picks up on rather than describing the point of the image. with the editing required to fix a chatGPT image description you could have written your own and it would be better.

I truly cannot write an image description

ask for help. if you have no one you can directly ask, add a note to your post asking for help writing the description when you post it. when someone writes a description for you, copy and paste it into the original post. there is no such thing as image description theft, the point is accessibility. you can't steal accessibility. copy and pasting is not just okay it's encouraged!

on other people's posts (regardless of whether or not you can write an image description) you can often find image descriptions in the notes. taking a minute to check for image descriptions before reblogging an undescribed post is something fast and kind you can do for the people who need image descriptions. often you'll find a description and then hurray! that inaccessible post is now accessible!

....but I don't have any followers who need image descriptions!

yes you do.

if you truly don't it's probably because none of them can access your blog. fix that and suddenly you will have followers who need image descriptions

why is this in the pluralgang tag? none of you describe images.

Questions are encouraged

(if you have any)

[wlfhardinc]

@akhillaous This is in response to your comment because it’s too long to say it in a reply. Plus this will explain my post for everyone else

Ok this is going to be long. I’m not great at explaining so this won’t be coherent plus this would have been way easier if I had visuals but alas The song of Achilles is a book so I’ll just have to try. In season 1 I think Jayce has more similarities with Achilles and Viktor has more similarities with Patroclus. Achilles and Patroclus were very innocent in their beliefs and whatnot in the beginning of the book. Jayce and V too in season 1. However that’s when Thetis/Mel come in. Yes I know this is kinda weird- I don’t want to compare Mel to Achilles’s mom either but hear me out. Mel sort of manipulated Jayce to do what he did for her benefits . Thetis did the same to Achilles to get what she wanted. Anyway, when Achilles and Patroclus end up going to Troy to fight, it all begins fine. Achilles protects Patroclus as much as possible because Patroclus has no fighters genes whatsoever. Jayce was also kind of protective to Viktor in some ways. My point is everything begins well. Both ships have the same principles. Achilles vows to not kill Hector (because of the prophecy that if he does, he will die) which is what Patroclus also wants, Jayce wants to make the world a better place which aligns with Viktor’s ideology. It is only later on when Achilles starts to get too prideful with all of the newfound fame as aristos aichon (best of all the Greeks) He makes dumbass decisions and Patroclus starts to get a little pissed. This is similar to season 1 Jayce and Viktor. Also I just want to quickly mention the women. Sky and Briseis both have a platonic but great relationship to Viktor and Patroclus. Mel and Deidama both had a romantic relationship with Jayce and Achilles where it is unclear whether they truly loved each other. In the Song of Achilles Achilles seems to have been forced to have sex with her while other perspectives on the Greek mythology says that they loved each other. In arcane everybody has different opinions and perspectives on Jayce and Mel’s relationship. I think those are all the parallels I could muster up for season 1. Next is season 2. In season 2 Jayce=Patroclus, Viktor=Achilles. There are definitely more evident similarities in season 2 I feel like. Viktor obviously leaves Jayce, ending their partnership. Whilst Achilles doesn’t exactly leave Patroclus, they do get into more and more arguments and differences. Viktor goes back to the undercity and becomes Jesus 2.0 or whatever. Achilles becomes prideful and starts getting high on all of the glory he’s receiving. Although both characters still have the same principles, they execute it terribly which leads to some problems with their partners as we know. Viktor goes crazy, Achilles goes crazy. At the end because of Achilles’s mess ups and arrogance, Patroclus basically sacrifices himself. Jayce did the same with Viktor. In the end, Jayce and Viktor sort of die and just become eternal beings or whatever. Patroclus and Achilles are also both dead in the end and also meet each other in the afterlife, becoming eternal beings in a way. However in the Song of Achilles, Patroclus was at first not buried properly which is why he was just a wandering ghost for some time. When Achilles died his situation worsened as literally the only person who would have buried him was dead. Achilles was buried because everyone loved him so there was no way he wasn’t buried. It was only when Thetis decided to let him go to the afterlife that he was able to meet Achilles. I thought that was pretty similar to the ending of Arcane when people would write the names of their loved ones who died during the war and no one wrote Viktor’s name because the only person who would’ve was with him. Also as I said in my post, ‘historians’/the general audience will know both relationships as close friends or brother. I’m sorry that this is so badly explained but I tried my best😭😭

[calirph]

𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐇 𝐅𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐘 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐄𝐏𝐈𝐂 𝐅𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐘 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐐𝐔𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒. all these sentences come from a search on goodread's keywords for high fantasy and epic fantasy. please change names, locations and pronouns as you see fit.

“Wouldn’t the joys of life lose all colour, if life was eternal?”

“True siblings are bound together by far more essential things than blood, while more times than many blood isn't thicker than water.”

“I believe with all my heart, that Magnus is a worthy and superior successor to your current king. ”

“Fate was a fairy story and a bullshit one at that; fate could get fucked and go bother someone else.”

“You shouldn’t ask the girl blessed by Death whom she’ll die for. You should ask her whom she’ll kill for.”

“You are what I imagine the sun to be like. Fiery. Beautiful. Damning”

“We’re all selfish monsters— the only difference is some of us are more honest about it than others.”

“Tell me a secret, then. One you can part with.”

“Control is an illusion, something to make us feel grounded and in charge of our destinies.”

“Don't overthink everything. You might be surprised by how much you'd like being out of control. Being alive is chaos, and living in it is half the fun.”

“Her hand in mine is as good as gold.”

“One taste, and a thousand deaths you shall receive.”

“You and what army?”

“Maybe today was the day the fire roared and defeated all the rest.”

“To love was a privilege not afforded to those of us born in these trying times when survival was never guaranteed.

“No one doubts your honourable nature, most noble of kings and best of brothers.”

“Don't dwell on your past - it's not where you're going”

“It's your life. Do what you want with it.”

“Ambition comes with a price attached. Of course, that price comes too high if you die for nothing. The reward for ambition too great... is self-destruction!”

“Don't you wish you were here?”

“Most animals are willing to talk. It's the human who don't listen.”

“Some call it brash. Others call it independent. Pick your interpretation.”

“How can I even begin to understand the nature of power when no one shares a common definition of it?”

“No one used my family against me to accomplish their own goals. Not even God or an Immortal.”

“You remember him as a hero, so none of it makes sense for you. But you can remember him like that without caring what others think. No parent is perfect, and growing up is realizing that.”

“The dark doesn't mean you're alone.”

“The tongue is shallow, like water lapping at the shore. To fully understand is to swim in the deep ocean with all the senses.”

“The same thing that you value. Justice for the sake of it, and the safeguard of those who need it. Our methods may differ, but our hearts are the same.”

"My goodness, look at your face! Why ask if you thought I'd say no?"

“Come with me, I think I have a new escape for you.”

“Why should injustice, the darkness of justice, exist and not be an imperfect entry in a book unread for centuries? Until it is so forgotten, that no one remembers it was ever there.”

“That's what friends, that's what brethren are for. To be there, where words cannot.”

“What a thraldom, to be able to dream and only then to be free!”

“The wise man does not play games with dragons.”

“I don’t want to be remembered . . . I just want to live without fear.”

“A name does not make the man, just like a lie does not tell the full story.”

“He told me that everything I was afraid of in the dark was also there in the light. The only difference was the way it looked.”

“Hate is what will obliterate the brightest of the stars that shine inside your heart.”

“A smile is deceptive, I have found. Some are real… and some are false. Sometimes it is hard to tell the difference.”

“Nothing is truly real until one is willing to believe in it.”

“Those who long for perfection will never achieve it, while those who expect failure are always surprised.”

“I don’t have friends— only accomplices and enemies. You’d be amazed at how often they change sides.”

“Fathers are like that, Always disappointing their children when they need them the most.”

“Of course I would fall for Captain Emotionally Constipated. I could train a rock to hold more affection for me.”

“Because that means you’re thinking, and a thinking woman is usually something to fear.”

“Everything makes so much more sense, when you forget what life forces you to remember.”

“Influence is like the tide. Sometimes it goes, sometimes, however, it comes.”

“What kind of person do you wish to be? A part of those who take action, who try the hardest, or of those who go with the flow?”

“The same good folk who would burn me for a psychal now paid me to use my cursed gramarye to guard their sheep.”

“The God-War is coming.”

“Why must we overlook what we are most likely able to do?”

“I speak of the laws man has made, to make everyone lawful.”

“Before, I never knew how far I would go. Now I believe I have the answer. I will go as far as there is to go. I will go way too far.”

“Show your power by appearing powerless.”

“Books are keys that open many doors.”

“I am going to go into this world, and I don't care if you and your narrow mind cannot be a part of it.”

“You are blessed with a knack for sucking the wonder out of the extraordinary.”

“Right and wrong matters little when survival matters most.”

“The hard truths are the ones to hold tight. - Old Bear”

“One can't exactly savor vengeance when one is dead.”

“This was not going to be a peaceful day. No. It was going to be a mess.”

“When a mortal man breaks a people, it is always blamed on the gods.”

“That is the way of the gods. When they intervene, everyone loses something.”

“Life was cruel. It pitted the weak against the strong and never even blinked when the weak were crushed.”

“You were bringing me all those flowers when I was sick, like you were wooing me. How could my poor, weak heart resist?”

“I would choose freedom over comfort every time.”

“Women were always the cruelest where other women were concerned.”

“Is this a knight who comes before us, or the answer to a child’s riddle?”

[velvetvexations]

As someone who is both trans and has PTSD, honestly I related to ISTTVG more from a PTSD perspective than a trans perspective.

Like that movie is one of the few pieces of media that I can really relate to, as someone who had the sort of childhood/developmental trauma that means that no one can tell whether I'm autistic or if it's just PTSD. I went through the sort of childhood where I had to repress a lot of myself in order to survive it, and had I not met my current main partner there's a good chance that I would have spent a lot of my adult life continuing to repress who I am for the convenience of those around me. When I say I had to repress myself to survive, I mean to the extent that I did not think that I was capable of feeling anger until I turned 19 years old because I wasn't allowed to express or show anger so I repressed it to the point I didn't realize I had the capacity to feel it. And it was nice for once to see representation of someone who is also clearly repressing themselves to survive, who was so similar to how I used to be.

To me the movie encapsulates really the feelings of growing up in an abusive environment where I had to repress my personhood in order to survive and then transitioning to an adulthood where I still didn't have the support/resources/space to stop repressing because I was still just trying to survive, and the idea that while stopping repressing and allowing myself to exist as myself is scary and painful and difficult and even upsetting sometimes, if I don't do it I'm not going to be able to live a life I'm truly happy in.

And I know for a lot of people the thing that they're repressing is gender, and that in repressing their gender they end up repressing their sense of self. But for me it's like the opposite, my gender identity is something I repressed and didn't pay attention to because I was representing everything that's part of my selfhood and identity and what it is that makes me me. But I've been scared to talk about it because like it's clearly intended as an allegory for being trans and given the current state of discourse I'm scared of being blamed for stealing representation or whatever by saying it's good representation for my PTSD, but it really is such good representation of an experience I don't really see represented all that often

Fascinating. Thank you for sharing, anon!

[amysubmits]

Totally agreeing with everyone else. Very obvious abuse to those reading this. You deserve so much better than being pressured into motherhood that you do not want, at an point - but especially when you are so young and still figuring out who you are (as everyone that is 20 is!). I really think YOU deserve better, full stop. At the same time, sometimes it's easier to protect other people than it is to protect ourselves. So in case that's true for you...I want to speak to the baby part of this.

No good dad wants to force his partner into motherhood. Reluctant mothers are not good mothers even when they try their best to fake it and hide it from the baby. Babies need to be DEEPLY adored by their caregivers, it's how we develop a positive sense of self-worth and self-confidence among other core aspects of personal development. And from an extremely early age, babies can sense when they are not adored 100%. Which might sound crazy but imagine it this way. If you were in a car wreck and rendered unable to speak or feed yourself, and a nurse came in to feed you who hated her job and resented feeding you, even if she didn't say a word to her, you'd definitely pick up on it, right? And you might feel guilty or angry or any variety of other negative emotions about the experience because of it. Where if on the next shift a nurse comes in who again says nothing, but you can tell she's emotionally present, and truly enjoys being able to care for you with dignity and respect while feeding you? It'd be a totally different experience, right? Babies do the same thing. A mom that is delighted to feed her baby, change her baby, hold her baby - vs a mom who feels burdened by her babies needs have a bunch of tiny differences in their tone, body language, etc that babies pick up on before they have language. And it impacts the bond they make with their mother. Having a baby you do not want is almost certain to leave you with bad mental health, and mothers who are depressed or have other mental health issues impact their babies, even though, again, they are trying their absolute best. I'm a dork who has been reading about attachment styles. It's frankly a little terrifying how impactful mothers are on their babies. I never really doubted that our mothers leave a huge imprint on how we develop, but in deep diving on the topic in the last several months I've realized it's SO much deeper than I ever realized. Even ont he modern age where people are trying to be 50/50 parents...the impact of the mother is bigger than the father, full stop - even when the dad is a stay at home parent! Babies know they were once part of their mothers body so the need that they have to be attuned/aligned with their mom is just unmatched. So going through with a pregnancy to try to appease him absolutely will impact the baby. Not to mention, he clearly doesn't respect YOUR needs and wants, so the odds of him respecting a baby's needs or wants is basically 0. I mean, even by trying to encourage you to get pregnant when it's not what you want is a sign that he doesn't care to prioritize the baby's needs. My point is - he's showing signs of abusing you, but also setting up a family dynamic of unmet needs (aka neglect) for a potential baby. That's not a good start to life for a baby.

I hate the thought of having a baby I can’t think of anything worse. I’m 20 and at university and see this bright future ahead of me. But my boyfriend is a bit older (30) and desperately wants me to be pregnant. But apart from the fact that I really don’t want children, I don’t want to drop out of uni and I love the way my body and life is.

My boyfriend is threatening to breakup with me if I don’t at least try, and I really can’t lose him I love him so much. But I don’t know if he loves me as much as I love him because why would he ask me to do this? I’m so confused and don’t know what to do. He says if I’m actually serious about him and love him as much as I say I do then I should give him my contraception pills to look after

I'm going to answer this seriously, because it seems like you're looking for actual advice.

Your boyfriend is abusive. This will be glaringly obvious to everyone who reads what you've just written. You should break up with him as soon as you safely can, and you should be extremely careful about your birth control in the meantime.

You're completely correct: this is not the way someone who loves and cares about their partner would act. "If you loved me you would" and "I'll break up with you if you don't" are well-worn tactics of abuse, and he's trying to use them to override your most important needs in an irreversible way. Deliberately having children is not something you should ever do unless both partners are fully on board, and this is the nightmare scenario: one partner not wanting it at all and the other one trying to pressure them into it.

This is also a very familiar pattern: he's 30, you're 20, he's trying to force you to get pregnant so that you're dependent on him and isolated from all your current support networks, with no way to get out. Age gaps like this are concerning precisely because of the possibility of abuse, and the abuse looks exactly like this.

One more thing I want to address:

I really can't lose him I love him so much

Someday you're going to look back on this and say "I can't believe I ever thought that was love." You're 20, and if this isn't your very first relationship as an adult, it's surely one of the first; you have so much ahead of you. You're going to find someone who genuinely loves and cares for you, and when you do, you're going to realize that this relationship was like a cigarette, not a campfire: it could burn you, and poison you, but it couldn't keep you warm.

Take care, anon. Tell some people you trust about this, and look for domestic abuse counseling resources at your university. You're in a very dangerous place right now, and you need to focus on making it through safely.

[gayofthefae]

Just thinking about the miscommunicated needs between Will and Mike in season 4. 

Mike was sharing his burden: his guilt, his torn-ness, his shame, his anxiety of a situation that he communicated himself as unchangeable. In his words, something you “can’t come back from”. He was seeking to cope by processing verbally the fact and consequences of him not being able to say “I love you” to El. We hear him say “if only” statements a few times. That’s a part of processing grief - something that has passed. He wishes he could have, but he doesn’t view the situation as something that can be saved by now. If only he were a person who could.

But Will thought he just couldn’t say it but wanted help communicating it. Will thought he needed advice. Will thought he needed a push.

And they were so close to being on the same page. Enough so that Mike thought they were for a long time. “You know, if you keep staring at that, it’s not gonna change” later answered with “It just felt like a fight we can’t come back from”. Same page, right? “You can tell her then” maybe not. “Sometimes it’s scary to tell people how you really feel, especially the ones you care about the most, because what if they don’t like the truth?” Same page, right? I mean, he said what if they don’t like the truth. If that isn’t the same page, I don’t know what is. And he is nodding. And he looks like he might even be about to say something. So later, he does. He confides about how he feels like he isn’t enough and he feels like El is so above him and he feels guilty that he can’t say he loves her but he doesn’t want to lose her over it and “You don’t want to lose her” Same page! For sure, right?

But not because what’s the next thing Mike hears but “You have to tell her, she’ll break down if you don’t tell her you love her, she told me herself. She loves you so much she had me make you this to represent how much she missed you. You REALLY need to tell her.” not on the same page.

So he tries to tell her, because the stakes are much higher than he thought. If he doesn’t tell her he loves her, she’ll feel like a mistake. And this is a short term solution to be delt with more long term later. But he’s interrupted by Argyle. And then he wants to save her and he’s losing her RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM to VECNA and Will suggests it “You’re the heart”. And if the lack of his love made her feel a like a mistake, maybe the presence can help her too. So he says all the true things about how he doesn’t want to lose her. And he makes sure to say the phrase too. Lord knows if she heard it. Lord knows if it helped. But it’s better than nothing.

Oh, the consequences of a miscommunication.