#which would feel kind of bad after four years lol

[gojoest]

curiosity (part 2) — gojo satoru

MDNI, f! reader, she/her pronouns, childhood best friends to lovers, college, no curse au, once again mention of ex gfs (one of them makes a brief appearance), pining, reader wears boy shorts, reader is a virgin (no virginity loss), so is satoru lol, mutual masturbation (handjobs + fingering), he cums on your belly (accidentally), pussyjob, first kiss, kind of proofread (sry if tenses are messed up), wc: 5.3k, dividers by @/cafekitsune 

this takes place the morning after the handjob you gave satoru and is basically a long ramble about two childhood best friends exploring each other’s bodies (nowhere near in moderation) but finding it difficult to redefine their bond. 

part 1

a/n: i didn’t think i would get around to writing a continuation but here we are... i fear there will be a part 3 as well in the future :’) i hope you enjoy! <3 

Last night Satoru and you slept together, in one bed, for the first time in years. 

Sure, it wasn’t just sleeping like you initially (and very confidently) suggested. Curiosity got the better of you after he, although not intentionally, showed you a side to him you had never seen before. And so, you got a bit handsy. 

Satoru stopped sharing a bed with you during sleepovers sometime early into high school. ‘You always hog the blanket’, ‘You toss and turn a lot’, ‘You breathe too loud’, ‘It’s too hot’... — is what he would say, and you didn’t think much of it. Shrugging it off as him being a rude idiot, trying to make you look bad. 

There was no way he’d actually tell you that he had started popping frequent boners around you, courtesy of puberty along with these unrequited feelings he started harboring for you the day you moved into his neighborhood at the age of four. 

It was embarrassing. He couldn’t possibly come clean to you — you were best friends. What if you came to hate him? What if you started avoiding him? 

He spent his high school years trying to get over you. He started dating around. But he never felt the same way with any of the other girls, a clear sign of which was his actions and the lack of dedication toward them. He’d often forget about promised dates or picking them up after school to walk home together because he was too busy following you around. Helplessly. Hopelessly. He couldn’t just leave you on your own even for a second, the thought of seeing another dude hanging around you would scare the shit out of him. Trying to let go yet strongly clinging to you. You didn’t need to like him back as long as you didn’t like anyone else either. Just stay by his side. 

And now, college isn’t any different. 

Well, it wasn’t. Until last night. 

Satoru couldn’t sleep after what happened while you dozed off quickly, as if the events that took place were nothing out of the ordinary. You seemed oddly comfortable which, truth be told, rose concern in him. 

He had a lot of questions. 

Do you like him? Weren’t you supposed to be at least a bit nervous if you did? Or were you simply so curious about these stuff that anyone would’ve been fine, it just happened to be him? He’s glad it was him. But what will happen with you two now? Will things be awkward? Can you go back to how you used to be? What is he supposed to say to you once you open your eyes? Will you start avoiding him? Should he pretend like nothing happened? 

“Shit, I fucked up”, he whispers, thumbing his forehead like he’s trying to get rid of a headache that isn’t even there. 

Please don’t avoid me, he thinks as his gaze shifts to you, still sleeping soundly. 

You were drooling on the pillow in your sleep. Your hair was a mess and your eyes were crusty, the dried residue sitting in the inner corners of them. The entire blanket was on your side too, covering only you while he was out in the open, his feet cold.  

What’s so good about you anyway?, he thought for a good minute. A soft smile creeping in on his lips. He couldn’t come up with a single thing that wasn't. 

“Mff...”, you let out a drowsy yawn and your eyes flutter open. Rolling on your back, you stretch your arms up and turn your head to look at Satoru. “Mowniiin’ ”, you drag out through another yawn. 

Satoru’s heartrate picks up. Here comes the moment he’s been dreading — facing the consequences. “Hey”, he greets back, a little bit dull in order to mask his nervousness as he acts out in his head all the different possibilities and the plausible end of your friendship. 

“You don’t have a boner again, do you?”, you ask bluntly, unaware of the sweat and blood he’d been shedding in an internal battle up until now, filled with fear that today might be the day he loses it all. 

“Really now?”, he gives you a look. Your crudeness is astounding him but in a way it also lessens the worry in his chest. “You’re really going to ask me that?” 

“...do you?”, you turn on your side again, a glint of amusement in your expression. 

“You know I am. Don’t you see it yourself?”, he clicks his tongue. 

You snicker to yourself. Of course you do. After all, the blanket was wrapped around you only while he laid exposed next to you with no layer to cover the bulge in his shorts. 

“Morning wood?”, you look at it. “Or is it because of me again?” 

“Stop assuming things, it’s morning wood”, he states point-blank. “It’s always like this when I wake up”, which was a lie. It didn’t always happen, or at least it wasn’t this insistent. 

“Hmm”, you nod. “Maybe you’re not cumming enough?” 

“That’s not how it works”, he sighs. “And this is definitely not something I’ve ever expected to hear from you” 

“Hmm”, you nod again. Peeking at him mischievously. “Can I—” 

“No.” 

“But—” 

“Cut it out, will you? What’s gotten into you ever since last night? Asking to touch me and what not?”, he snaps, frustrated.  

“But you let me” 

“Men can’t say no to that when they’re about to bust”, he lies, kind of. “But what the hell is wrong with you?” He thinks it’s so unfair to test him like this when he’s the only one with feelings. It is quite cruel of you. 

“I don’t know”, you shrug, a guilty pout on your mouth. Satoru never raises his voice at you unless something is really bugging him. “I’m not sure myself, but I liked it, what happened last night... I enjoyed it”, you quietly admit. 

“You did?”, his voice goes back to normal, but this time it’s his eyes that snap wide. A slight sense of hope creeps in inside his heart now. Maybe this little slip-up could kick start something, he starts to think. 

You nod. “Didn’t you like it too?” 

“...I did”, his face heats up and he covers it with a hand. The essence of the conversation and the fact you liked touching him made his cock even harder. It wasn’t just a simple morning wood at this point. 

“I want to do it again”, you tell him. “But do you?” 

“You ask me stuff like this when I am horny and expect me to turn you down?” He slowly slides his hand down his face, stopping it right over his mouth and cupping it into his palm. “Are you sure?”, his voice muffled. 

You shake your head affirmatively, with zero hesitation. “Can you touch me too? I got really wet last night while jerking you off... Your struggling face and the sounds you made were really...sexy. I wanted to cum too”, a tint of embarrassment in your tone now that you were saying this out loud. 

Your abrupt and not at all anticipated confession had Satoru almost chocking on his own saliva. Due to shock, it went down the wrong pipe when swallowing, leading him to cough profusely. “I am starting to think that you’re plotting to kill me one of these days” 

“It’s because you told me to come to you if I ever get curious about other things” 

“I clearly did not mean murder” 

You chuckle, and slowly peel the covers off you, throwing them out of the way and kicking them behind you. The shirt you’re wearing rolled up, exposing the boy shorts on your lower half and a damp spot visibly staining them on the front. 

“You're wet", Satoru points out, surprise and smugness mixed in his expression.  

“I thought you didn’t like to state the obvious”, you huff, rushing to fix yourself, but he reaches for your hand and stops you in your tracks.  

“Is it because of me?”, he looks at you with a glint of hope, giving you a taste of your own medicine, while guiding your touch toward his crotch. His other hand pulling his shorts and boxers down, just enough to take his cock out and press your hand on it — feeling less awkward and a little bit more confident about this now that he sees clear indications of your arousal. 

Sure, you touched him last night, but you didn’t see him... It all happened under the covers, so this was a first. He was big, both lengthy and girthy. Veiny too. Precum slicked the tip of his cock. The head was pink while the rest — a lighter shade but still a bit darker than his complexion. You didn’t think of it as pretty, yet it was stirring weird, unknown emotions and desires in you. 

“...yeah, ‘cause of you... I think”, you bury your face in the pillow, shying away, but at the same time you shamelessly wrap your hand around his length, giving it a slow first stroke, causing his breath to rasp in his chest. The needy little pant he let out the second you made contact with him urged you to rub your thighs together, the tension in your lower half growing heavier. 

Now with your roles somehow reversed, you realize how embarrassed he must’ve been last night... 

“Can I?”, he swallows nervously. His hand, slightly shaking, held out in front of your clothed pussy, waiting for your verbal permission before he goes any further.  

“Go ahead, I was the one who asked in the first place”, you reassure. 

Just like he did for you, you help your shorts down for him and place his hand between your folds. “But—”, you pause, timidly flinching at the foreign touch. “Don’t push your fingers very deep, I— well, you know...” 

He smiles. “I know, don’t worry”  

He was aware that you never had your first time. Neither did he, which you would probably never guess. 

Despite his rich and lengthy dating history, Satoru never went that far with any of his girlfriends. Not that the opportunity was never present — he had the looks and he had the charm so naturally they would throw themselves at him quite often. But he simply never desired them enough to even pop a boner. Well, sure it happened a few times here and there and only because some of them resembled you way too much. 

At the end of the day, his dick and his mind were oddly connected. And his mind, it was still stuck on you. Perhaps, deep down, he always hoped that one day you’d be his first. 

Just like last night, you were laid on your sides again, but this time both of you had your hands in each other’s pants. Your faces so close you were touching foreheads and breathing into your mouths. Not kissing, just breathing and exchanging pants and lewd moans as you worked your hands through the pleasure of the other, reveling in the sounds you each made.  

"Is this, um, okay... like this?”, he breathily asks, but what he truly means is ‘Am I doing this right?’, while he’s got his thumb on your clit, rubbing it in circles, and two of his fingers — index and middle — carefully gliding over your inner lips. 

You hum, biting your lip in an attempt to swallow the obscenity threatening to roll out of your tongue. Your mind was slowly going blank. “I-it f-feels real-ly g-good”, you manage through multiple pants. “Too g-good", you add, your grip letting loose around him, slowing down the strokes, the more he teased your folds. But, his free hand grabs yours, squeezing you back around him while he starts to buck his hips into your fist — a subtle reminder to maintain your ministrations, to not forget about him. 

You huff at his actions, but it’s only fair — you acknowledge.  

He must have quite the experience, you think. This thought a bit bothering you on itself, that he’s had his hand down other girls’ pants before, maybe his cock too, so he’s able to multitask like this... While this is a first for you. Unsure why, you feel like slapping him the more you think about it, picturing him with other girls makes you oddly jealous, but his fingers ease you back into pleasure. You’ll get mad at him later, you think. 

“Tell me if it hurts. Okay?”, he nuzzles his nose against yours — since both of his hands were busy now, this was the only way of asking you to look at him. 

He wanted to see your eyes and confirm for himself that you were indeed alright, that he was really doing this right because he’s never done it before, only seen it in porn. He was afraid that he’d get too distracted and hurt you unintentionally. You felt so good against his fingers that it was enough to make him lose control. All the wet dreams he’s had in the past can’t compare. He already had a lewd depiction of you in his mind that he used to jerk off to — about the way you’d look and feel down there, about the noises you’d make, about the ways your face would contort with fervor... But he realizes now that he was too frivolous and lacking in imagination. The real you beats it all. 

You look at him, your brows slightly lifted, lips closed but twitching in betrayal, threatening to let out the loud moan building in your throat. His fingers scarcely prodding in only weakening your resolve. 

“Let it out”, he speaks to you softly. “Don’t hold it back”, again with that sweet, sweet voice. 

"Shit, you’re so foul when you use that kind of voice”, you audibly gasp, and then let it all out.  

He chuckles. 

His pace quicker now, greedily trying to drag more moans out of you. His entire palm, squished between your legs, now covering your pussy, rubbing harder against your folds with his middle finger slightly curled so the tip of it darts inside you with every movement. Not too deep, just enough to not break your hymen. It was driving you insane and you couldn’t keep your mouth shut. You’re certain you have never been this loud in your entire life. And you really wanted to slap him again because you were the only mess right now, your urge going stronger after witnessing that cheeky expression on his face, his tongue poking out the corner of his mouth, too focused to make you cum — maybe he was paying you back for last night. 

But alas, you couldn’t do anything about it. You lost control, completely as he hit just the right places and brought you overwhelming, toe-curling pleasure. 

“Did it feel good?”, Satoru curiously peeks at you as you try to catch your breath. 

“Yes”, you heave. His hand was still there, fingers fumbling with your folds, hence why the tremors washing through your body took longer to quiet down. “Very”, you add. 

“Will you help me finish too?” 

You nod, fixing your loose grip around his cock but moving it in a quite relaxed manner, slowly. 

“Are you doing this on purpose?”, he huffs. 

“No. What’s the rush?” 

“We have classes” 

“We’re already late” 

You squeeze, your strokes now steadier — not faster, but heavier — as you drag your hand up and down, earning a gratifying groan out of him. “We can skip altogether”  

“And?”, he pants, with eyes half-lidded he looks at you. Are you going to suggest what he’s thinking about too? 

“We can stay like this for a bit” — you gather your pace. “Wash up” — accelerating it more after the pause. “Have breakfast” — and some more. “And do this all over again” — and... 

Satoru opens his mouth but doesn’t say anything. Instead, he moans low and throatily as his orgasm starts to build up. 

Was it the way you moved your hand or what you said that made him crumble so fast, he was not so sure. But it was quite the intense thing. He bucked his hips a little until every bit of drop was out, and he did so in a way that made you clench. The way he squeezed his eyes shut, nose scrunched up while he bit his lower lip, his hand gripping your waist to steady himself as he thrusted into your fist... It was way too of an arousing sight. 

He made a huge mess too. His cum sprayed all over your belly, uncontrollably. Your hand and fingers coated in it too. 

“Shit— I didn’t mean to”, he panics, jolting and rushing to grab some tissues from the nightstand, but you stop him. 

“It's okay”, you reassure him. “I think I like it”, you confess. “Next time you can cum on me intentionally” 

“There is really something wrong with your head, we should go get you checked out”, he mocks, but he hides his face in the pillow to conceal the smile stretching on his lips along with the already existing blush on his cheeks. Next time, huh?  

You stayed in for the day. Just as you suggested, you lingered in bed for a little longer, bickering back and forth, which put Satoru at ease. He was sick worried, but things were still the same between you two. Not quite as they used to be, considering last night and this morning, but you were still you. There was no tension, nor any awkwardness in the air. 

You washed up together over the bathroom sink, bumping hips as you brushed your teeth. 

He always kept a spare toothbrush for you for when you’d stay the night. He diligently changed it with a new one every now and then. Although you didn’t have any clothes over at his dorm room, he gave you his while complaining how thoughtless you were for not bringing spare clothing with you, only causing him more trouble with piling up more laundry. But he liked it, secretly. His t-shirts looked good on you, like you were his girlfriend. He didn’t have any clothes back at your room either, at first. There was no way yours would ever fit him, so he brought some and left them there. You always washed them with your clothes and they smelled like the detergent you’d always use. It made him feel like he was your boyfriend. 

Later, you had breakfast, and after that — another session of exploring your bodies. Again, you only used your hands. He sat you on the table and fingered you while you stroked his cock. 

You played some games, read manga, took a nap, ate lunch, and then you did it again. 

And again, after dinner. 

Then some more before you went to bed. 

You never kissed though, not yet. As if the kiss itself meant something entirely different in the light of what you were doing, something more intimate than masturbating each other. 

Day two and three were no different, you stayed locked in and repeated. You ate, you fucked each other with your hands, and you slept. 

Nothing changed on the fourth either, only that you ran out of food but ordered takeout. 

“Can you make it a bit spicy?”, Satoru spoke on the phone to a nearby restaurant he’d frequently order from. So frequently in fact that they knew his order by heart, and asking for the dish to be spicy was unusual of him.  

“Huh? You always make we don’t put any spice in your food? Are you sure?”, the takeout clerk gasped from the other side of the line. 

Scratching the back of his head, Satoru looked around to see if you were still in the bathroom before he spoke. “Yeah, I know. But, um— my girlfriend likes it”, he said, his face heating up with a red hue. 

You weren’t his girlfriend. Neither of you made an attempt to redefine your relationship, and he was too afraid to make the first step. What if you were simply acting out this way because you were indeed just curious?  

Either way, he wanted to say it. To say that you were his girlfriend. And it wasn’t the first time he’d done it. People would often time confuse you for a couple, and he’d never flat out deny it. You never knew about this though, it always happened behind your back. Either his friends being too nosy, or an old lady on the street telling him how good you looked together after you ran off to pet a stray cat. 

On the fifth day, some friends got a bit worried. You were gone for almost an entire week, skipping classes, so that was a given. 

suguru: wtf bro  suguru: u alive? 

satoru: yeah  satoru: more than ever 

suguru: huh 

satoru: i might have a shot with her  satoru: i'll tell u later 

suguru: with who? 

satoru: ur mom i've been pining over since i was four  satoru: be fr now  

suguru: wait  suguru: HER her??????????? 

satoru: yeah HER her 

suguru: wow it's happening? 

satoru: idk  satoru: ...kinda 

suguru: good luck bro  suguru: if you fuck it up i'll try my chance with her  suguru: so make sure u do ur best LOL 

satoru: i will beat u up and block u 

Naturally, it started to feel less awkward the more you did it. ‘Are you hard?’ or ‘Are you wet?’ being the initiating lines you were both dying to hear now, knowing well what they’d lead to. The answer was always ‘yes’, there was no denying that you were both hard and wet around each other for the most part. 

At some point you began skipping the questions, just letting your hands roam and find out. Consent was always silently present. 

Even when you weren’t being naughty with each other, it was different. You had definitely started seeing Satoru in a new light, which scared you a little bit. The way you looked at him, and the way you caught him looking at you — it wasn’t the same as it had been. There was more to it. 

On the sixth day, you tried something different.  

“My hands are tired”, you complain. 

“Let’s try something different”, Satoru proposes. 

He lies on his back, holding his cock flat against his stomach. “Hop on it” 

“What—”, your eyes pop out in shock. “I’m not ready for that, yet”, you squirm, holding your face in your palms. You were curious about intercourse, of course, but you were also scared. All the forums you scrolled through had a different take on it — some netizens said the first time was painful while others claimed they only felt a slight discomfort but nothing more. Many mentioned bleeding too. You didn’t know which category you’d fall into. And as much as you wanted it, the idea of putting Satoru’s cock inside you was quite intimidating. He was big. Will it even fit?  

Satoru chuckles. “I don’t mean that — just straddle me, sit yourself right on top of it and rock your hips back and forth” He points at his cock, “See, I am holding it down for you so it won’t enter you. You’ll just hump against the length of it and nothing more. It’ll feel good, I promise” 

You peek at him from between your fingers. “Okay”, you timidly agree. 

It was good, but short-lived. Unfortunately, you didn’t get to finish in this position because Satoru came too soon and too hard, his entire body shivering continuously. He had no idea what he was getting himself into when he proposed it but having your warmth and your slick on his cock directly from the source messed him up. It took him every ounce of restraint not to just slide it in and have his way with you. 

On the seventh day, after all the things you’d done, you finally shared your first kiss.  

It was nothing nearly romantic like it was in the books and in the movies. In fact, it kind of happened out of spite. 

It was around lunchtime. You both felt like eating pizza today, and so you ordered. In the meantime, while waiting for your food to be delivered, you hopped in the bathroom to take a quick shower. 

Satoru wanted to join you too, but you kicked him out, telling him to wait for the delivery guy. With a tail between his legs and a hangdog face he crawled back on the bed, huffing and puffing loudly so you could hear him and maybe pity him enough to invite him back... 

His brilliant performance of a sad puppy was interrupted by a knock on the door. This was quick, he thought, and jumped out of the bed, thrilled — he could pay for the food and sneak in to play with you... 

He quickly tossed on a shirt and put on some shorts on the way to get the door. 

It was not the food. 

It was his ex, standing on his doorstep with her arms crossed over her waist, eyeing him demandingly. 

“Don’t tell me you’re so heartbroken over our breakup that you would lock yourself in your room and skip classes for an entire week?”, she scoffs. 

“Did you forget who broke up with who?”, Satoru snorts. 

For sure, she did not. Satoru did it quite cruelly, over text after ghosting her for three days. It was not his proudest moment but he didn’t care enough to feel guilty over it.  

And she was fully aware of it too. But still, she liked him a lot, in fact she liked him ever since orientation and it took her an entire year to work her way to him. She was desperate. 

She sighs deeply, dropping the attitude now. “You never replied to my messages” 

“Didn’t see” 

“You did, but you left me on seen” 

“Must’ve forgotten to answer” 

His answers were short and dry. The timing was simply bad, and he wanted her out of here before you came out of the shower, concerned that her being here would create a misunderstanding in your head. 

“Look, I am sorry I said all those stuff about your friend. But it bothered me, okay? You treated her more like a girlfriend than you did me, your actual girlfriend... I was constantly under the impression that—”, before she could finish a third voice cut her off. 

“’Toru”, you yell from behind him. “Is it the food?” 

Your hair damp, a towel wrapped around your body, you saunter over to the door from behind him to peek, but your feet freeze in place. 

Oh? That girl... his ex. 

You woke up happy this morning, in fact you woke up happy every morning for the past seven days but now your mood was foul all of a sudden. That same odd feeling you’d get whenever you thought of Satoru with another girl creeped in in your chest. While you brushed it off easily in the past, you couldn’t quite do so now. The irritation grew more insistent. Your demons were threatening to act up. 

“...there was something going on between you”, the girl finishes her sentence, then pauses to let out a short laugh and shake her head in disbelief before she continues. “I guess my hunch was right, huh?” 

You step a little closer, standing right next to Satoru. 

Something you couldn’t quite put your finger on came over you. Of course, you could read the room — she obviously came here to mend things up. And you were not happy about it. Not in the slightest. Was this annoying feeling tugging at your chest called jealousy? You didn’t have a reason to hate this girl, she did nothing to you. Yet... 

“Well, well. Aren’t you a smart one?” — you couldn’t believe the words coming out of your mouth right now but you didn’t have it in you to stop.  

Utterly amused, Satoru stared at you. He was shocked, in a pleasingly new way. A semblance of an idiotic smile plastered on his lips while he did nothing to stop you. 

“Should I perhaps solidify your hunch with a proof so you stop running after someone else’s boyfriend?”, you glare at her. 

Standing on your toes, you clutch a handful of Satoru’s shirt with both hands, pulling him down to the level of your face for your lips to reach his, and kiss him. 

Helpless in the face of your lips laid against his, he lets out an audible gasp. The sound of it vibrating against your mouth. It wasn’t supposed to be like this, he thinks, but his eyes close anyway, melting into the softness of your lips. There was no tongue, just a long peck, and he couldn’t help but smile into it. 

Without breaking the kiss, you look at the girl from the corner of your eye, and you slam the door in her face. 

“Good riddance”, you murmur after pulling away from Satoru, and walk back inside. 

He never knew that a simple kiss like this could make him so dizzy that he would lose his balance and stumble. As if his feet got caught in something he involuntarily took a few sharp steps forward, putting his arms out to steady himself and avoid falling face down. 

“Hey”, he called out, slowly following behind you. 

“What’s her deal anyway?”, you keep going at it, still beyond irritated. “Didn’t you guys break up?” 

“Hey”, he speaks again, stepping closer. 

“And she's pestering you like this? The audacity...” 

“Hey—” 

“What!”, you yell, turning around to give him a scolding too because, knowing him, he probably didn’t end things with her in a manner that was polite and proper.  

...but he was right behind you, smiling at you affectionately with his eyes. It made your breath hitch, and your chest — feel a bit peculiar. 

“Hey”, he repeats again, softly. His hands squish your cheeks inside his palms and he slowly cranes his neck down. “Did you mean it?”, he asks through a whisper. 

You shift your gaze to the side, avoiding to look at him directly. “Did I mean what?”, you puff. 

“Calling me your boyfriend”, he tilts his head to the side, blocking your view and forcing you to look at him. 

“No... I was just saving your ass” — you try to break free to prevent the heat on your cheeks from warming the skin of his palms, from giving you away. But he’s holding you still. 

He leans in closer and whispers, “Would it be so bad if I was your boyfriend?” 

It was not a question as much it was a plea. Let me. 

“You’re a bit of a jerk sometimes, so maybe? I know for sure people will judge me for my poor taste” 

“Your mom won’t, she likes me”, he points out, proudly. 

“She likes you more than she likes me, her own daughter, so her opinion is invalid. In fact, she would tell you to go pick someone better”, you snort, and he laughs. She really did love him like her own son. After all, he grew up in her hands along with you. You spent day and night together, in and out of each other’s houses. 

“I am serious”, he gives a gentle squeeze around your face, an attempt to snap you out of the ongoing banter because he was desperate to know. You didn’t give him a proper answer, but you didn’t reject him either — there was still hope, he thought. “Would you hate it?” 

“...I don’t know”, you let out quietly, conflicted. 

“Should we try? Or are you only curious about my body?” 

“See? You’re kind of a jerk after all”, you pout. “Will things change... between us?” 

“Aren’t they already changing?”, he smiles. 

You hum, softly tugging at the hem of his shirt with both of your hands. "I don't want to lose my best friend if we screw this up” 

“Same”, he nuzzles his face closer. “That’s why, we won’t screw this up”, he quietly chants into you like a promise, drawing his lips to yours tenderly before either of you have the chance to panic any further about the implications of this change. 

[satorusluver]

You're Mine

Fem reader x Gojo Satoru

biscuitsngravie asked: 23 (jealous sex) w gojo pls 😭🙏🏾 Anonymous asked: 45 (possessive sex) + Satoruuu Tags: smut (MDNI), fluff, mild angst if you squint, p in v, creampie, established relationship, doggy style, jealousy, pet names (baby, angel, princess), mild degradation (slut) Word count: 1,400 ish (how did this end up so long, it was supposed to be a drabble lol) A/N: Sorry this took so long but I had a lot of fun writing it, so I hope you like it xoxo.

Hickeys and bruises litter your torso, your breath is heavy and erratic, and your limbs are struggling to hold your body up after so long of being in your current position. That position is being on all fours under the strongest sorcerer, his thick cock pounding into you with such force that you think you'd go flying off the bed if it weren't for his large hands having a firm grip on your waist.

But even now, with the fat head of his dick ramming against your soft cervix so hard it makes your eyes water, you know he's holding back. Even if he's still a little pissed at you for flirting with Nanami, he's not giving you everything he's got because he knows he could seriously hurt you if he did - he's not called the strongest sorcerer for nothing. So with every brutal thrust into your tight cunt, you know there's love behind it.

Then, you suddenly feel him pull out of you, dragging his cockhead along your slick, puffy folds that are dripping with a mix of your fluids and his. You hear the faint sound of him chuckling at your needy whines when the tip of him brushes against your oversensitive clit.

"More, please..." you mewl, pressing your ass back against him.

"More? My little slut wants more?" he asks in a tone that somehow manages to be even more arrogant than usual, even for Satoru. "You always want more, always so desperate for my cock. Why else would you act like such a brat at a time like this?"

You hate that he's kind of right. You'd been all but dragged back to your apartment after your boyfriend had witnessed you flirting with Nanami at an event the three of you were attending. Yes, stone-faced, serious Nanami, who is everything your energetic and borderline flamboyant boyfriend isn't. His usual happy-go-lucky attitude had been replaced by frigidity, his dark sunglasses lowered to glare down at you with sapphire eyes narrowed in irritation as he pulled you close and whispered for you to "get in the fucking car, princess." You didn't even get to see the food being brought out.

"Didn't think it would bother you so much...'m sorry, Toru..." you say innocently, but you're not really sure that you are when it's earned you three orgasms.

In the few months since your years-long friendship with Satoru had turned romantic, he'd never shown any legitimate jealousy. Satoru is nothing if not confident, and a bit of a flirt himself at times, being part of his unreserved nature. This coupled with the fact that he's absolutely gorgeous means he gets hit on A LOT. Sometimes even right in front of you.

So you in all of your brilliance decided to try to get back at him with what you thought was a little harmless flirting. Granted, Nanami was only polite to you, not really flirting back since he (and everyone else) knows you're with Satoru. But that isn't the point. The point is that you were showing interest in someone who is Satoru's complete opposite, someone who has outwardly expressed his disdain for Satoru's outgoing and carefree personality. And while Satoru doesn't usually get insecure, that actually managed to get under his skin, which is how you ended up here.

"This is what you wanted, right? This is why you were acting out? You love the way it feels, don't you? The way it stretches you out, the way I can reach your cervix without even trying?" your boyfriend teases, his voice low and husky in your ear.

You just nod dumbly, finding coherent thoughts impossible when all you can think about is just how fucking bad you wanna feel every thick inch of him ramming into you again, fucking you until his name is the only thing you remember.

The sound that escapes you when he finally pushes past the tight ring of muscles at your entrance is little more than a desperate cry, but you have no sense of dignity left when the six eyes himself has got you bent over for him and is spearing you on his massive cock.

"You look so good like this, all covered in my marks," Satoru croons, one of his fingers lightly tracing the hickeys he left on your neck and shoulder. "Hope they don't fade before Nanami sees them. If they do, I'll have to give you more."

He leans his body over yours, reaching to hold your chin in his hand and turn your head back to face him. Crystal blue eyes meet yours, and there's a moment of something almost vulnerable in his expression before his face hardens into the same look of jealousy he gave you when he pulled you away from Nanami earlier.

"My pretty girl. Mine. You think Nanami could ever fuck you like this?" His tone is soft, but there's still a dark glint in those beautiful eyes. His words are emphasized by him pulling out until only his cockhead remains inside of you, and then slamming roughly back in all at once.

"N-no, Toru, only you," you gasp out, the intensity of his thrusts knocking the wind out of you as you feel that knot beginning to coil in your lower stomach for the fourth time that evening.

"Only me? That's right, baby, I'm not just the best at jujutsu, am I? I fuck you the best, don't I? I love you the best, don't I?" That hint of vulnerability is back, and you wonder if you really have gotten to the great Gojo Satoru in a way you didn't know was possible. That he really was deeply afraid of losing you, the only other person he's ever felt close to aside from Geto Suguru all those years ago. You nod reassuringly, one shaky hand reaching behind you to pet his face as you manage to get out a breathless "love you, Toru" in between gasps for air.

Satoru's hand slides down your waist to rub at that sensitive bud between your legs. You can tell that he is nearing his own end as well by the absolute filth he spews almost mindlessly. "Fuck, baby, I love the way you clamp down on me when I rub your cute little clit. You gonna cum for me again? Yeahhh, you are. That's a good girl, oh fuck yes, milk that fucking cock, 'm gonna fill you up."

You rock your hips back against him, moving to meet his strokes as best you can with your worn-out, achy legs. You're painfully close to reaching that high you so crave, and every press of his swollen tip against that spongey spot deep inside you causes your whole body to tense up with pleasure. Satoru barely manages to hold it in until he feels you cumming around his fat, veiny cock one last time, letting out a guttural moan at the feeling of your gummy walls clenching so tightly around him as you cum in white-hot waves so intense it causes starry spots in your vision.

Your legs finally give out from under you, that last orgasm draining what little energy you had left to hold yourself up. "I got you, angel," Satoru whispers huskily, his strong arms holding your hips up as he fucks into you, desperately chasing his own high. His full, heavy balls that you can feel slapping against your ass with each forceful stroke begin to tighten with his impending release, and moments later you feel it - the whole length of his dick throbbing and pulsating deep within you as your insides fill with that familiar warmth.

"Fuuuck", Satoru groans, shooting his hot, sticky cum right up against the entrance to your womb. He almost collapses on top of you himself now from the intensity of his own orgasm.

After taking several seconds to catch his breath, Satoru gently maneuvers both of you onto your sides, careful to keep himself inside of you. One arm wraps around your middle as he pulls your back snuggly up against his chest.

"I wasn't too rough, was I?" he inquires, his brows furrowing and his sparkling blue eyes turning pouty with concern.

"Don't worry, I'm alright," you reply breathlessly, still recovering from your final orgasm.

"Good. Love you, love you so much," he whispers, littering a few soft kisses along your cheek and jawline.

"I'm glad you're okay...but you're mine, princess, and if I ever catch you flirting with Nanami again, you won't be able to walk for days." He chuckles light-heartedly after he says it, but you get the feeling he's not joking.

[aihoshiino]

chapter 165 thoughts

Aqua Hoshigan Status: It's Officially Hoshinover

Chapters Until The Story Ends Without The 143 Kiss Being Addressed Or Acknowledged: 1

damn i guess they really did just kill his ass

I'm gonna be so real with you gamers, I kind of don't have a lot to say about this one either lol. Which I acknowledge sounds completely wild given the Everything that happens in it, but most of my meat and potatoes analysis in these reviews comes from breaking down characterization and we're flying through everything at such breakneck pace that we're barely getting any characterization.

It continues to drive me bugfuck insane that Ai is completely absent from this finale despite the importance of 15 Year Lie. Its imagery is plastered all over but whenever we return to it, we just see Aqua. Not only that, but Gotanda is the one who insists on pushing the movie through for Aqua. 15YL as a story about Ai's true self and her tragedy is now officially taking a backseat to being about Aqua's tragic death and legacy. It was already bad enough that we spent so much time in the Movie Arc not actually focusing on Ai to the extent that, as everyone pointed out, based on what we saw on-page it was basically a Sad Kamiki Movie, but this really is just pissing right in the wound at this point lmao.

The funeral scene also serves as the final nail in the coffin for any Secretly Alive Aqua copes, which is kind of a relief. I still don't like how Aqua's death played out, but I think dragging it out for four chapters then going "sorry you thought i was /srs when i was just /jk" would have been infinitely more insulting. I don't like this ending, but I can respect that Akasaka seems to be sticking to his guns on it, even if we still do have like a whole chapter left for him to whip around and go "I WAS /JK ALL ALONG!!!!" but I don't see it happening.

Anyway, yeah! The funeral! Uh. Is it gonna sound weird if I say I felt kind of like… grossed out reading this the first time? Like, I really don't know how else to explain the visceral "why the fuck is the author making me read this" reaction I had to it. I think it's just because Kana is so fucking distraught here and the drama is just so hammy and so over the top that it feels kind of… ech. I dunno. I just really didn't vibe.

It doesn't help that this is part of a much broader pattern in the back half of OnK of Aka getting us right up close into the gory details of a character's complete mental breakdown and suffering and then spend zero time or focus on their recovery. This happened with Ruby all over the Movie Arc and this many times and with this little runway to the end of the series, it just starts to feel exploitative, like a way to cheaply pull at our heartstrings without doing the work to build everyone back up after tearing them down.

also pre-emptively dreading all the fuel this is going to add to the fires of People Who Are Weird And Misogynistic About Kana but she could die saving innocent children from a burning building and people would find reasons to be shitty about her lmao

we really are not seeing ruby's reaction to finding out her brother was dead huh lol

I will say the one thing I didn't Actively Dislike about this chapter was Ruby, though. I was honestly starting to get pretty skeeved out with how many people were gleefully predicting or actively wishing for her immediate suicide purely for ship motivated reasons and I was also worrying that the story was going to pretend that Ruby doesn't like. Have a life and support system outside of Aqua. Yes, she should absolutely be affected by his death but this period of her shutting down only to drag herself back onto her feet that we seem to be getting feels way more in line with pre-Movie Arc flanderization Ruby and I'll take that W where I can get it.

god. I haven't even talked about Kamiki's supposed serial killer cult. I just don't have the strength. Like… that's self-evidently stupid, right? I don't need to explain to you why that's ridiculous and unbelievable? You don't need me to tell you why it's fucking crazy that we're getting this information about the alleged overarching antagonist of the series not only in the second-to-last chapter of the entire series but after he was already dead, right? We can just move on? Ok good. jesus christ.

FINAL CHAPTER NEXT WEEK…

[danieyells]

hi there,

thank you so much for all the voicelines you post !! if it’s okay, can i request subaru’s ?

thank you again !

You're welcome! At some point I might go back and put in the ones I leave out because they don't appeal to me as much lol but since i always end up posting 99% of them anyway I think it's enough for most people hahaha. It's all of them now! Sorry for the delay.

I WAS GONNA OMIT ONE OR TWO BECAUSE OF SPOILERS but eh i'll just warm for like. extra spoilers. since after doing more code peeking it wasn't the spoiler i thought it was. SUBARU IS A SWEETIE THOUGH. I also read Subaru's chats which were put in the code recently and. Man this guy needs anxiety meds. I have a small guess as to what his stigma is, but we'll learn in a few days anyway.

Hello: (the first time the game is opened after that character is set as home screen NPC. Only happens once per day, unless the character is switched out and back.)

"I'm very sorry to have kept you waiting. It's wonderful to see you again."

You've Got Mail: (whenever there's something in the inbox, usually Arena rewards)

"It looks like there's a notice for you. I'd be happy to go pick it up for you if you've got your hands full. Oh, forgive me if I'm overstepping."

oh no he's anxious about helping--

Default: (requires no affinity, has no time constraints)

"I really am so lucky to be surrounded by so many kind people like you."

"I never thought I'd get the chance to enjoy the lifestyle of a student until I came to Darkwick. Every day truly is fulfilling here."

it feels like subaru is like. . .the only one who actually enjoys school life here. . .or who really enjoys being here period lmao. . . .

"You think I'm always smiling? Ha ha, I hear that a lot. It just happens when I'm around all of you."

"I may be the captain, but it's just in name. I think Haku is much better suited for the job than me."

"I've been working since I was four, so people often said I was mature for my age. But the truth is, I've still got a lot to learn."

that makes two characters whose parents have essentially been keeping them from normal life and normal childhood for work reasons since they were four year olds. . . .

Affinity 1: (between 5am and 11am)

"I tend to just have hot water for breakfast. I know it would be better for me to eat a proper meal, but it's just so much effort."

DO WE REALLY HAVE TO START WITH "I NEED THE GHOULS TO EAT PROPER FUCKIN MEALS". . . .

Affinity 2: (between 11am and 4pm)

"I'm sorry I'm so late. The campus is so crowded I can never manage to walk in a straight line, so it always takes me longer than I think. Silly, isn't it?"

baby you're hardly the first person i've met with anxiety about crowds. you're fine.

Affinity 3: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"What would I do without Haku's help? Hotarubi would be a mess without him."

Affinity 4: (between 8pm and 5am)

"I wonder if I should apply early to take out any common artifacts I might need for this mission. I'll ask Haku what he thinks..."

Affinity 5: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Ah!  You surprised me there... I just got back from a small errand. Do you need something?"

Affinity 6: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Ever since I was a child, the performing arts were my only focus. Maybe that's why people always say my mannerisms are so peculiar. It bothers you too, doesn't it?"

poor boy doesn't know how to act if he isn't acting. . .he doesn't know how to exist off-script. . .no wonder he made a deal with a demon. it's probably the first thing he's ever done for himself.

Affinity 7: (between 11am and 4pm)

"I'd like to go to the cafeteria, but the line is always so long. I feel bad taking time to choose while people are waiting behind me. The bar of entry feels a little high."

i am once again suggesting subaru get anxiety meds. hell go to sinnostra and get some weed, i bet they sell that. i hear it can help.

Affinity 8: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"I'm just about to go and meet a friend. I hate to inconvenience you like this, but if it's something urgent, could you speak to Haku about it instead?"

Affinity 9: (between 8pm and 5am)

"What am I going to do? We're supposed to be meeting up in an hour... If I cancel now, they'll hate me..."

Affinity 10: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Whew... I'll walk you back to your house, {PC}. Oh, it's no problem at all, I assure you! I wanted some fresh air anyway."

Affinity 11: (between 5am and 11am)

"I have an Anomalous Ecology test coming up. It's such a fascinating subject, I couldn't help but stay up all night studying. Now I'm a little sleep-deprived."

Affinity 12: (between 11am and 4pm)

"I'm going to stretch my legs a little. I might not have a show to practice for right now, but I need to keep putting myself through my paces. I'll get rusty otherwise."

Affinity 13: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"I'm sorry my phone's been making so much noise. I recently downloaded an app by mistake, and it won't stop sending me notifications..."

awww he's also technologically incompetent. . .poor guy was probably raised with such a heavy focus on his career he just. never needed a smartphone. anyone he needed to contact or who needed to contact him was probably always very close by. it sounds like he didn't even properly go to school before going to Darkwick. Somebody please take this boy on a walk. like anywhere. take him to a library. buy him a churro. can sho make churros? this is somebody who's never had any sort of normal social experience and sees how different he is and wishes it weren't the case, unlike Ritsu who assumes everyone else is like him, i think he'd like to have some more Experiences.

Affinity 14: (between 5am and 11am)

"... ...Oh! Hello, {PC}—I didn't even notice you there. My mind was somewhere else."

Affinity 15: (between 5am and 11am)

"Good morning! Sorry? My hair's messy? You're right, it's sticking right up at the front... That's embarrassing. I'll fix it right away."

Affinity 16: (between 11am and 4pm)

"I usually have lunch in the dormitory. I do eat on the terrace with Lyca every now and then, but he seems so busy these days..."

Lyca is one of the members of Obscuary, btw! Seems like he and Subaru are friends.

Affinity 17: (between 10pm and midnight)

"I didn't take you for a night owl, {PC}. Since you're here, I suppose I'll stay up a little longer. You're sure you're okay? You're not sleepy?"

Affinity 18: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Do you visit Sinostra very often, {PC}? I see... Oh, no reason. I was just making conversation. Ha ha."

why do you ask that. . .a certain mafioso captain wouldn't happen to be suspicious of you would he. . .or maybe you owe them money. . .or maybe you used to be part of Sinostra and moved to Hotarubi. . . .

Affinity 19: (between 10pm and midnight)

"It's getting late, {PC}. How about we finish this tomorrow? Thank you for keeping me company all this time."

Affinity 20: (between 5am and 11am)

"Oh, I couldn't ask you to come all the way to my room to wake me up—I'd feel terrible. I do very much appreciate the thought, though."

it's okay buddy jin already makes them do it, one more pit stop won't hurt.

Affinity 21: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Oh, hello, {PC}. Sorry, I was actually just on my way out. I should be back by evening—do you mind if we speak then?"

Affinity 22: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Lyca has seen my message, so why hasn't he responded to it? I hope nothing bad has happened to him..."

Affinity 23: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Lyca will adapt well to human society, I'm sure of it. I'm so relieved that Darkwick chose to trust him. I can't thank you enough for your help."

he really likes Lyca huh? that is his dog.

Affinity 24: (between 10pm and midnight)

"You can't sleep? Then let me tell you some stories. Legend has it that evil spirits appear once you've told a hundred. Now, what number was I up to..."

BOY IS TRYNA GET YOUR ASS HAUNTED.

Affinity 25(max): (no time constraints)

"I don't want to seem like I'm testing you, I just... I get really anxious sometimes... I'm sorry. I'm being weird, aren't I?"

he's the type to ask 'are you sure you love me? are you sure you wanna be with me?' after you get married and move in together and own a house and have two kids with another on the way. he's the hyper anxious 'i'm sorry we disagreed about our favorite colors do you hate me?' friend(affectionate) I wonder though, is he apologizing for seeming like he's testing you because he's using his stigma to see what you've been up to or something. . .? Probably not lol it's more likely he just keeps asking if you like him

Spring: (March-May) (between 5am and 11am)

"There is no time like spring. Everyone seems more relaxed this time of year. It's reassuring to see."

(between 11am and 4pm)

"I have some sakura mochi. I was just about to prepare some tea to go with it—would you like to join me?"

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"They have no control over whether they bloom, and yet they get made a spectacle of nonetheless... Oh, sorry—I was talking about the cherry blossoms."

(between 8pm and 5am)

"There are many different flowers growing in Hotarubi, but I think the wisteria are my favorites. This is the best time to see them, so you should take a walk around."

Summer: (June-August) (between 5am and 11am)

"Hot today, isn't it? It's always raining in Hotarubi, so it does provide a little escape from the blazing summer sun, but... Ha ha. It is very humid, isn't it?"

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Summer makes me think of the ghost story Yotsuya Kaidan. The scene where Oiwa becomes hysterical, having realized her her face has been disfigured— incredible."

Yotsuya Kaidan is one of the best known japanese ghost stories! It's extremely violent, so read the summary at your discretion. The scene in question has Oiwa shown her reflection by her sister's boss to see that the cream she was given by a woman who was in love with her husband was actually some sort of poison that instantly scarred her face. She grabs a sword and goes to kill her, only for her to accidentally slit her own throat.

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Hotarubi House holds regular festivals during the summer months. If you need a yukata to wear, I'd be happy to pick one out for you."

(between 8pm and 5am)

"I don't mind scary stories, but when that biwa in the tea room started playing by itself, it did make me jump a little..."

slight spoiler, although you can probably figure it out from this but. . .Zenji is a ghost. Subaru currently can't actually see him or hear his voice. . .only Haku, the pc, and, perhaps not so oddly, Towa can afair. All of his youtube content doesn't have him or his voice in it because he can't be recorded by cameras. So Subaru doesn't realize that the biwa playing on its own is actually Zenji playing the biwa.

Autumn: (September-November) (between 5am and 11am)

"The air has gotten crisper, and the leaves are changing color. I know it's only natural for the seasons to shift, so why does it make my heart ache so much?"

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Oh, these? They're some chestnuts I found. I know—I should give them to Sho. I'm sure he'll be able to make something delicious with them."

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"That's another kuchikiri tea ceremony under my belt. It's an annual tradition where one cuts open a tea jar to reveal the tea that was preserved from the first harvest."

(between 8pm and 5am)

"On long autumn nights when the moon is shining beautifully in the sky, it's hard to resist taking a walk outside. Don't stay out until too late though, {PC}."

Winter: (December-February) (between 5am and 11am)

"...Oh, {PC}. Good morning... I had a hard time getting up today. It must be the cold... Ha ha. Not very captain-like, is it?"

Jin, Taiga, and Ed are all prone to not getting out of bed. and Yuri falls asleep on operating tables when he has down time. Trust me Subaru you are perfectly captain-like.

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Today, I'm going to order ingredients from one of my favorite stores so we can all make negima—tuna and scallion—hot pot together. Please, do join us."

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"It's cold out today. I was just thinking about lighting the fire. Would you like to come and warm up with me?"

oh subaru you don't even know how that sounds

(between 8pm and 5am)

"People say winter makes you want to snuggle up with someone, but I find that a good blanket does a much better job."

i agree that blankets are much easier to manage than people lol. probably warmer too.

His birthday: (February 20th)

"A present? For me? Thank you... I didn't expect you to do anything for my birthday, so I'm a little caught off guard. I really appreciate it."

Your birthday:

"Um... Happy birthday.  I really hope this year will be a wonderful one for you."

New Years: (January 1st)

"Happy New Year. I hope I can depend on your guidance and support again this year."

Valentine's Day: (February 14th)

"Chocolate? Oh, It's Valentine's Day, isn't it? Does that mean these are for me...?"

nah i just wanted you to look at them. YES THEY ARE FOR YOU BBY. why would you be showing him chocolate if it wasn't for him! On any day, not just valentine's day!!

White Day: (March 14th)

"These are for you, {PC}. I put in a special order for monaka from my favorite confectioner in Ginza. They're wafers filled with bean jam—I hope you like them."

April Fool's Day: (April 1st)

"Earlier, Haku told me he was switching houses. It gave me a real shock— I'm very relieved that it wasn't true..."

i bet subaru made the most scared kicked puppy face and started apologizing for being such an awful captain and blamed himself for that haku would go to a different house and haku had to quickly explain it was just a prank for fear that subaru might burst into tears.

Halloween: (October 31st)

"Happy Halloween. I know it's nothing special, but I've prepared some treats for the occasion. Oh... But you're more than welcome to play a trick instead."

please don't trick him. april fool's day was hard enough for him.

Christmas: (December 25th)

"Merry Christmas. We already have our New Year decorations up in Hotarubi, so it has a real east-meets-west atmosphere now. I hope everyone is okay with it..."

Idle: (about 20 seconds without interacting with the game) (below 13 affinity)

"Everyone seems busy at the moment. Maybe I should use this opportunity to tidy the garden..."

(13 affinity and above)

"{PC}? Oh... I'm sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you. I was just worried because you were so quiet..."

Absent: (logging in for the first time in 2 or more days?)

"You're back... I'm so relieved. I was worried I'd done something to make you feel uncomfortable..."

this man shakes like a chihuahua 24/7. like you can taste the anxiety coming off of him. i love him. he's so pathetic(affectionate). i wanna squeeze his hand reassuringly and tell him everything's gonna be okay. i wanna hug him and pat his head. i wanna take him places so he learns more about the world outside of working. i wanna watch him do schoolwork excitedly because he's never really gone to school before and it's a new and exciting experience. i want him to experience the most mundane aspects of life with wonder.

good boy. yeah. get him anxiety meds /nodnod

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for being another displaced Padawan with Cal Kestis

Cal Kestis x jedi!reader

warnings: angst, STAR WARS JEDI SURVIVOR SPOILERS

a/n:

prompt:

you and cal went way back

like, jedi padawan back

so after the purge, about five years later, you guys reunited by chance. thanks to cere junda, no less

and, god, seeing someone so familiar after trying to get by on your own, someone who knew the feeling of the trajectory of your life being thrown off before you were ready, that wasn’t easy to come by

“you’re here” -cal

“i’m here” -you

“we survived” -cal

“just barely” -you

cere was delighted that the two of you could have lifted each other’s spirits so much, which was very much needed in desperate times, as you two were just given a very important mission by a former jedi master in your order

you and cal kicked some serious ass together, helping one another relearn old lessons your masters had taught during your youth

“i think running across walls was the hardest thing i was ever taught” -you

“it took me forever to get that right! i could only get two steps in before i plummeted to the floor!” -cal

you shared a lot of stories and emotions during travels, in private

and not all of them were positive, but this was the first chance you’d had in five years to face these emotions, to air out your feelings

“do you miss the clones? i was so fond of our battalion, they were always so kind to me” -you

“i think…i think that was the worst part. the people who defended us in battle, gave me pep talks before training, always there, that same face at every turn suddenly behind the blaster that was meant to put me down” -cal

“i miss them” -you

cal and you had your missions together…and separately. you’d be on one planet and he on the other, trying to race the empire and inquisitors to the holocron

“it could happen all over again” -you

“it could be the key to saving the galaxy” -cal

“or we’d be creating a generational tragedy” -you

“so would the empire” -cal

“you’ve got me there” -you

cal gifting you ponchos from his travels (lol)

“any chance you like pink?” -cal

“well…” -you

braving zeffo alone while you knew cal was somewhere far more dangerous, you had a bad feeling about it

but your teachings from the order were always the same, no attachment. mission first, feelings second…no, last

but on cal’s adventure, he found merrin, a nightsister from dathomir

you hadn’t seen any nightsisters since ventress, which did happen to make you feel a bit off

“cal…you sure?” -you

“trust me, y/n. things have changed. merrin is just like us” -cal

“cal told me much about you. another survivor. a pleasure” -merrin

you and merrin grew quite close actually

she was truly spectacular, and swapping stories with her was sort of educational

“wait…the jedi responsible for the nightsister genocide? you said lightsabers, plural? how many?” -you

“four” -merrin

“two green, two blue?” -you

“precisely. how did you know?” -merrin

“hang on, no way—” -cal

“my master killed him shortly before we were split up…when the clones turned” -you

“grevious? really? master kenobi finally got him?” -cal

“who is this ‘grevious?’” -merrin

“general grevious, he was a separatist general—a cyborg. he wasn’t a jedi, he stole lightsabers from his kills. he ordered the attack on your home” -cal

“i’m so sorry, merrin” -you

you three were still healing from many scars, but doing it together was much more achievable than trying alone

it was a wonder you even made it to fortress inquisitorius

you, cal, cere. all three of you fought like hell to save those kids.

now, cal and you, you two had much different perspectives than say, cere or trilla

displaced padawans. little guidance. cal was barely old enough to even be a padawan learner, but times were desperate and the order called upon the youngling to start quite early. you were in a similar boat. it made you two see eye to eye better than most

trilla, a padawan with much more training and insight, one who was failed by the order that she was most loyal to. failed by her own master.

cere, a devout jedi master who failed many people who were counting on her. who lost herself to a side of herself that every jedi is supposed to fight.

and just before any resolution could come of all of you together, the famed and feared darth vader showed himself

and the sinking feeling you felt before he arrived froze you

“what is it, y/n? y/n?” -cere

*ominous breathing sounds*

you shook off the feeling, fleeing instead

cal and you were split up when you swore vader made a point to hold you back

“run cal! get out of here!” -you

“y/n l/n, i was hoping i would see you” -vader “where is obi-wan?!”

“i thought you were dead” -you

“is that what he told you?” -vader

“you’re going to kill me to get back at him? i haven’t seen him since the purge, anakin! i left!” -you

“there is no anakin!” -vader “did you leave, or did he leave you?”

“are you just going to let cal get away?” -you

“he can’t get far” -vader

“my journey is not important to you” -you

“you are like me, y/n. obi-wan failed us. these inquisitors are weak, impressionable, disposable. but i know how you think. i know how he thinks. i give you the opportunity to join me. fight with me.” -vader

“i saw the holotapes, anakin. i saw what you did to the younglings and i will not let you do it again. we are not alike, obi-wan did not fail me. i took a page out of ahsoka’s book, i found my own path. and it is not beside you.” -you

“this is not over, y/n. i trust you’ll find your way out” -vader, force pushing you off a ledge

you did find you way back out and merrin was quick to save you before going back for cal

you were left completely unharmed, as well, which was quite the surprise to everyone else

“what happened back there, y/n?” -cal

“nothing i’d like to relive” -you

cal nodded and let it go, focusing on the holocron floating before you all

your mind kept replaying memories as they discussed what to do with it

memories of anakin’s massacre. vader’s speech. younglings you couldn’t save. luke and leia somewhere across the galaxy. the inquisitors.

“destroy it.” -you

in one quick swipe, cal took his lightsaber to the glowing blue cube. no questions asked

and from there on, it was no longer about the order. you remembered why you left in the first place. the purge, the politics, your master couldn’t contain himself. your troops turned their blasters on you. everything you were taught was bantha fodder. and you were just a padawan

it was now about disassembling. scaring the people in power while giving the little guy some hope.

“this is a much better gig than obi-wan playing by the rules” -you

“from what you told me, him and anakin never played by the rules” -cal

the name made you shudder, but you pushed past it

“well, anakin was known as the rulebreaker. obi-wan always tried to reel him in. but, i’ve noticed a rule or two that master kenobi had bent” -you

“anakin has a padawan too, right?” -cal

“he did. she was also a rule breaker. when she left the order, i almost followed her. last i heard, she went to mandalore with half of the 501st. i, uh—” -you

“right…” -cal

you were still haunted from the encounter on nurr. still hadn’t told cal and it was eating you up inside.

but the fighting made it feel better

dismantling, stealing, helping

and then merrin left. and cere. and greez settled down. and you and cal were just two makeshift jedi knights with your tragic pasts and your need to keep your place in the galaxy

and keep each other close

but not too close

those rules you followed, the one’s obi-wan followed, you threw them out a long time ago. the jedi order was corrupt. you examined each council master postmortem and decided that they were all flawed despite their rank. you hated them for it.

but decided the one teaching you would follow would be to lose hate, a step to the dark side.

you didn’t really even know at this point, what was the difference between right and wrong anymore

cal and you continued fighting. joined up with saw gerrera. never left each other’s sides

which…sparked feelings you’d never really been taught or told how to deal with

only aversion, really. but it wasn’t like you didn’t really talk about it

“i don’t really see the problem with it. look at everything else we do, that’s not exactly the jedi way” -you

“it’s dangerous” -cal

“love is dangerous?” -you

“attachment is” -cal

“i figured you already had attachments. we were all a crew before this” -you

“i let them all go” -cal

“and you’d let me go?” -you

you began constantly questioning these ways and trying to fight for a new future with cal, without pressing too hard

but it was hard to ignore those feelings and harder to constantly be denied by your old life

and it was harder when the new crew always teased you two

“come on, kestis. if you don’t, i will” -gabs

“yeah, just go for it. who’s it hurting?” -bravo

“i’m just not ready to go there” -cal

you were more bothered than you let on

but you always put the mission first

up until your trip back to coruscant

“this is just a reminder of how little it all matters now. there’s no one left.” -you

“that’s why it matters” -cal

the intensity of this mission made it so it was just the two of you again

and maybe that would spark something…but you doubted it

taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @locke-writes // @sweetheartlizzie07 // @queen-destenie // @captainshazamerica // @ravenmoore14 // @gabile18 // @sweetjedi // @retvenkos // @swanimagines // @randomfandomimagine // @dontyousassmeok // @dindjarinsspouse // @zoeyserpentluck // @summersimmerus // @scarthefangirl // @sheridans-dynamos // @lady-violet // @simsrecs // @xoxobabydolls // @ruvaakke // @simp-legend // @evilcr0ne // @thedarkqueenofavalon // @your-local-simp0 // @elenavampire21 // @pheonixfire777 //

[luvtak]

birthday blues, psh

☆ pairing fratboy!sunghoon x reader

☆ genre/tw fluffy fluff fluff, a twinge of angst, sunghoon has a case of the birthday blues :(( i wrote the mc to be quite introverted, hand holding lmao, cheek kisses! a little miscommunication, a very sweet and soft getting together fic <33

☆ w/c 1705

☆ a/n happy holidays!! i began this fic on sunghoons birthday but because i am terrible at planning anything i just finished tonight lol, so heres a little present from me!! i hope you like it <3

masterlist

With the bad music and the smell of cheap beer, you find yourself regretting walking through the door. The house is bustling with conversation and rhythmless dancing–not a sweater in sight despite the frigid air outside. Not one person you know or like is occupying the four walls around you, and even worse, your drink is weak. 

The melting ice is enough to kick start a negotiation with yourself, you’ll leave after this drink… tell Sunghoon happy birthday, and then we’re gone. You’re not sure why you even bothered… you’ve been on three dates with the boy and barely kissed twice. While he’s handsome and funny, you don’t know if that's enough to endure another mindless frat party while your roommates are cozying up at home watching the new season of Love is Blind. 

While initially you held some reservations about going on another date with a frat boy, Sunghoon proved himself to be very sweet.

 The first date was nice, dinner and a movie (action which was ironically very boring) and a chaste cheek kiss that kept you up way past your desired Tuesday bedtime. His lips were soft and his eyes were kind–a sort of unfamiliar shy glimmer staring down at you. He was ever the gentleman, opening doors and making sure to tell you how pretty you looked… He was perfect. Which was odd for a guy who spent all his time with boys who carried a carousel of girls around. 

The second date was quick but sweet, a speedy lunch in between classes, leaving a smile on your face until you got home that night. He had asked about you the whole time, wanting to know how your day was, and if you had had a good time when you went out before. And finally, the third, wherein the very pretty boy asked you to come to his birthday party before placing a swift kiss upon your lips. 

It was almost like you were possessed. Feeling a great urge to be there to celebrate with him–very unlike the person you claim to be, but he asked so sweetly. His fanged smile was large and on display, and he had a look in his warm eyes that reminded you too much of an overloved puppy. Too much time with those eyes and you were agreeing before he could say please. 

Now, you wished you had the gift of prophecy. If you knew you wouldn’t see the boy once since walking through the doors 45 minutes ago you never would have said you’d come. Of course, it’s his birthday and you’re sure he’s busy being shuffled along friends and pretty girls who’ve long since held his favor, but he asked you to come and if you have to spend another minute listening to mindless chatter you might never speak to him again–no matter how much you like his company.

The boys next to you are crass and the girls much more indulgent than you feel prepared for. Enabling their counterparts with enough alcohol and shitty pick up lines to put you out for the whole year. And while listening in to others' conversations isn’t the nicest thing to do, the loud groanings of, “Hey, pretty lady…you’re heating up this whole place.” were just too nauseating to ignore. 

While slurred words are always swoonworthy, it may be time to head out. 

It is barely eleven, but you’re ready to go–ego bruised and brain ready to rest with some mind numbing television. Not too mention, phone long dead from too many tiktoks watched to pass the time. You can’t believe he didn’t even make an effort to say hello. You made it clear you didn’t like this sort of thing–would rather spend a Friday night away from the hubbub and cheer of a college party that lost its charm the spring of your freshman year. 

Whatever, if he didn’t care you’re just glad he showed his true colors sooner rather than later. While it sucks,  it’s no use crying over another too pretty boy. 

Peeling yourself from the back corner, you find yourself jostled this way and that until your skin meets the chilly December air. A momentary shock of relief rings through your gut, finally away from the rotten place a younger you loved, and an older you was over. 

The night for all its misadventures did end up being a pretty one; stars barely peeking through the light covered city and shining down on the car packed street. Straining your neck to see them for just a minute before making your way to your car, you eye a startling figure sitting on the frat house’s roof. 

A boy with a curious resemblance to Sunghoon, but why would the birthday boy be out here instead of at his own party? His hair is mussed and though he is far up, it’s easy to see the messy state of his clothes–sweatpants and a sweater one could only describe as something a grandfather would wear. 

“Sunghoon? What are you doing up there?” it's too far, but you think you can see the little lift of his lips, a look of relief gracing his features. 

“What do you mean? I’m waiting for you, didn’t you get my message?” His voice, while covered by the echoing party and the nighttime sounds, still carries over the expanse of the front yard as if he was in front of you–as confused as it was, it does little to ease the annoyance of before. 

“What are you talking about Park? I’ve been here for an hour and haven’t gotten anything from you.” 

“Oh I’m Park now? But it’s my birthday.” betrayed by your own temper, you can’t help but let your teeth show. His ever composed countenance running away as he whines his words. 

Maybe it’s dramatic and maybe he did send you a message, but the bitter pain of feeling ignored won’t go away just because he’s cute. 

Even if he is really really cute. 

“How am I supposed to know if you really did send me a message and aren’t just saying that now that you’ve been caught?” 

“Come on now, Silly, charge your phone.” he’s grinning now, tongue running along the points of his left canine. “I’d invite you up, but it looks like you may just push me off.” 

“Why are you up there anyway? There's a bunch of people in there waiting for the birthday boy.” 

It could be your imagination, or a trick of the shadows, but it’s almost like that one word made his whole body falter. Straight shoulders falling below his ears and long eyelashes hitting the peaks of his cheekbones. Eyes closed and figure sad. 

From a young age you’ve been rather curious; looking through hidden presents and asking too personal questions to the people around you, but you don’t think you’ve ever been more interested than now. Looking at this handsome boy–too early to love, but too late to ignore–sitting alone on his birthday is enough to make you pause. 

“Sunghoon? Are you okay? I won’t push you off if you help me up.” 

While he doesn’t answer your question, he does reach out a hand to show you the way. Laughing loudly when you stumble through the tree branches, and quick jabs at your obvious roof climbing inexperience. It’s only when you’ve safely landed next to him that you can really see the slightly blue expression on his face. Of course he’s smiling–you don’t think he’s ever looked at you without one, but there's something invading his form. An ever present dusk sitting along his spine. 

The both of you sit in silence for a long time, looking out at the street and laughing at the party goers retreating through the yard. Young men and women stumbling and giggling their way through another weekend. It’s only when the music changes from obnoxiously loud electronica to obnoxiously loud rap does he speak. 

“I’ve never really liked today, you know? I get so excited for it to come, thinking it's gonna be a magical day that changes everything. Then I wake up and it’s just another boring day. I guess I haven’t learned how to deal with the disappointment, 

I’m sorry you were in there alone, I– I wish I knew you went inside. I was hoping I’d catch you going in and bring you up here. I thought maybe if I spent it with you, it could be life changing. Exciting enough to be worth another year.” 

How interesting birthdays are, to be so momentous and yet so disenchanting. You wait 365 days for a moment to pass, another year older with no magic in sight. Although you can’t ignore that he believed you to be life changing. How sweet, to think after only three dates he’s already decided that you’re who he wants to spend his day with. Face warming and hands shaking, you’re able to let out a soft laugh, before finally answering, 

“Well, maybe we should just treat it like any other day. No cake or presents, I won’t even wish you a happy birthday." It's strange how this seemingly mean sentiment lights up his face: brown eyes becoming crescent moons, a goofy grin settling along his mouth. A look worthy of a birthday. 

“What should we do instead?” 

“Hmm, if you come with me right now we might be able to see the rest of Love is Blind with my roommates. Kazuha and Intak swore they wouldn’t watch the weddings without me… Only if you want to.” 

And the way you looked at him with wide eyes and a hopeful smile, how could he say no. How could he tell you that all day he wished he could spend it with you.

He helps you down and keeps your hand in his as you begin the trek back to your apartment. The night is cold, but his figure next to yours heats you right up–brightening the walk back to your apartment, and making you thank whatever power made you stop to look at the stars, never knowing the tall boy was wishing on every birthday cupcake that you’d join him on the roof and change his life.

© LUVTAK

[sergeantsporks]

It's actually kind of hilarious that Belos didn't really seem to take witch kids into account with regards to his big bad super evil genocide master plan.

If he were smart, he would've made it law for sigils to be applied upon reaching school-age [Which could be anywhere from ages four to seven, depending on which country that you live in], if not at birth if such a law were politically palatable to the denizens of The Demon Realm.

Waiting until adulthood to apply the killswitch that you intend to use to, well, kill off the entirety of a different species, is just... weird. lol lol lol

It's like it genuinely didn't occur to him that children, due to their sigil-less status, would survive the DoU until, like, literally the week before it was due to go down. I wonder if the Collector had to point it out to him to finally get him to notice!? lmao

Even then, his way of "solving" the "problem" feels half-assed! And I'm not talking about how Gus ruined Adrian's sigil-applying mission to Hexside either! (Since the cover story for that was actually decent lol.)

No, I'm talking about how it never could've been guaranteed that every last child on the Isles would be at school that day. lmao

Some kids were going to be out regardless. Because they're sick or some family emergency came up or because they just didn't want to go to school that day. lol

Basically, Belos apparently had a child-sized blind spot when it came to the DoU, and it surprises me that more people don't seem to realize it.

Belos pretty consistently patronizes/underestimates Luz and the rest of the Hexsquad up until he gets stuck in the human realm with them. We also see how he thinks he can just manipulate the Collector into liking him again after he dropped them off a cliff. I think it's pretty safe to say that Belos has a pretty low opinion of children in regards to their threat level/general intelligence. He probably did just completely overlook the possibility that [gasp] children grow up and reproduce!

I don't think he's super in-touch with the day-to-day of his citizens, either. Willow and Gus' parents say they'll homeschool them; clearly there's a chance some students are homeschooled. But Belos doesn't deal with those kind of logistics. As far as he's concerned, all the kids go to school, and they'll all be there, all the time. He's hundreds of years old, and his "sick days" are the result of the rot eating his body! He's COMPLETELY out of touch with the tiny details. he did this much work; surely, his minions can take care of what's left. That's what he made the coven heads and the guards, for, isn't it? Delegating tasks? They'll take care of it.

[cryptocism]

So, out of curiosity (AND a slight fear of messing with what you've laid out so clearly in Frequency, which I see as the most reasonable and rational explanation to Thad's character inconsistencies basically, ever), I am wondering if this version of Inertia from Flash #760 fits into the Too Many Thads AU anywhere? From what I can tell, he's the only one not mentioned in your very thorough (and impressively detailed, he was at boomerang's funeral, excuse me sir why are you here???) timeline of Thad appearances. Would you consider him one of the clones we get from the AU, like Six? Or maybe just Thad himself given he's sort of just... chilling in the Speedforce lol. Or did you just not consider him given it's yet another instance of Thad appearing, doing something wild, then disappearing as quickly as he came haha. (Also, I just noticed he says vibrational FREQUENCY, nice👏)

i did... kinda include this iteration. but admittedly it's pretty brief, and the bits of story that take place in the speed force sit in dreamy abstraction rather than solid prose

start of chapter 2 when Thad is running thru the speed force:

He thinks he sees the Flash, once or twice. Tick tock tick tock. You’re running out of time, Barry. But he often thinks he sees lots of people. Once, he thought he saw Max. But the memories exist in his mind the same way a daydream would, and he can’t be sure if it was real.

The "tick tock tick tock" line is taken directly from #760

compared to the other threads of canon that Frequency is written around, it's definitely more on the borders of believably. The "tick tock" line and the bit where Thad threatens to snap his fingers and "blast Barry's mind to pieces" harkens back to the Kid Zoom era and Rogues Revenge, which fucks with my attempt to differentiate this Inertia as a separate person from Kid Zoom. but the hiccup feels minor enough that i think it still works

(and on a tangential note the whole "i'll snap my fingers and blast your mind to pieces" line straight up doesn't make sense to me because YES Kid Zoom famously snapped his fingers and exploded a baby, but he accomplished that by fast-forwarding that baby's timeline so quick that its literal molecules shook apart under the stress. Barry is a speedster and would not respond to timeline manipulation in that way - if at all - because his molecules are already used to that kind of shit. it's a weird and out of place threat to make and i think Williamson may have gotten the impression that Kid Zoom acquired the power of spontaneous combustion which he Fucking Did Not ok rant over)

the general idea i was going for was: Thad is running on rage, sees Barry, has the brief confrontation in #760 where Barry mostly just feels bad for him, and then disappears back into the storm. Implication being that Thad has actually had a couple different interactions with people during his 5 years in the speed force (Eobard, Max, Barry, etc) who try to convince him of things or promise him things, but staying for that long in the speed force (without being dead) fucks with perception a little bit, especially perceptions of Time. so when he's out and looking back on it, Thad can't totally discern what happened, what didn't, or in what order.

also the attendance at Captain Boomerang's funeral gets a shout out near the end of chapter 8 when Bart is going through Six's collection of Four's old stuff:

Some of the items on the shelf he didn’t recognize. A shot glass. A funeral pamphlet for one Digger Harkness. Several empty syringes and auto-injectors all meticulously arranged. A variety of small gadgets and devices that Bart couldn’t place.

because the funeral is technically Inertia's return after the events of Mercury Falling, I translated that as Four's first appearance in the 21st century

[deathsbestgirl]

So Never Again. Just saw this post and the way she looks up at him there is on a level with Mulder’s famous Fallen Angel eyes and his reaction to her? He doesn't melt? He chooses violence and being a dick? Please tell me why.

i LOVE this question because it is so easy to see it from scully's perspective. it's her episode. but you really have to think about mulder's perspective.

for mulder, this seems out of nowhere, and in his mind she was extremely inattentive with his informant on a case he's taking seriously. he doesn't understand what she's really asking or what the problem is, and a big part of that is she doesn't exactly either. it's almost like she's blaming him for the stand still in her life, but at the same time wants to be seen & appreciated (in a way that she understands, can feel, can see). and i don't think she could have figured it out the way she needed to with mulder. she needed the safety of talking to a stranger, someone inconsequential to her life. (like there's no way she could have that "other fathers" conversation with him lol) so ed jerse is the one to give her that. (she does with ed what she can't yet do with mulder. something neither of them are ready for and she isn't brave enough to do yet. and like. idk i just think she needed this! regardless of mulder lol)

like: "this isn't about you. or maybe it is, indirectly. i don't know." the one thing she got right is "i don't know" lol so of course mulder is confused!!

if you place leonard betts first, she's contemplating what she's leaving behind. has she had any impact working on the x files? on mulder? who is going to remember her? what evidence of her life will be left? in that office...it looks like she's had very little effect. (but i do not subscribe to this one.)

if never again is first, which i like better lollll (it makes more sense to me. i understand why people like lb first, it's more clear cut. it puts a reason behind her behavior. but i just don't think it quite fits. scully literally doesn't know what's wrong. if she was already worried about cancer, i think it would come across differently. but she's frustrated & confused and she wants for something she can't admit, express, pinpoint, articulate? idk what word i'm looking for lol) scully's just hit that point in her pattern again, her cycle...it took her four years, and after some rough cases (paper hearts – she couldn't help mulder despite how she tried, el mundo gira – a dead end. and idk, so many of their cases. and she's always wrong, he always does the crazy thing, he's always hurt)...well anyway, at the end he's still asking "all because i didn't get you a desk?" he still isn't quite understanding, until she says it's her life and he almost says "yes but it's become mine." he doesn't say it, they sit in silence, and in leonard betts, he tells her she did a good job & should be proud. all his little jokes like he's trying to make her laugh, to get back to their usual banter. because he wants to make her smile. so he understood at least a little by leonard betts. but they also come to a silent understanding. i just love the way kae talks about it. and i think the end is kind of the explanation for the beginning. the end is the real answer to the whole episode, and what it took to get there...and this post here, kae just understands him and talks about him in a way that i feel. it's exactly what i see in a way i could never articulate. (and she does my favorite thing!!! connects different moments. the characterization is so good.) and she has such a special insight to both of them, different patterns, but to me two sides of the same coin.

and so, either way, at the beginning of never again, he's completely thrown because he doesn't know. this is when their bad verbal communication and personal issues/insecurities/fears take hold. they're both so good at taking too much responsibility.

we're seeing into scully's mind a bit, but we aren't really seeing into his. but he's afraid, he doesn't want her to leave (something he's feared for a long time), he thinks space is the answer to whatever's going on. but he's also kinda needy and he can't just say that. so he calls her and they misunderstand each other again and she makes a date. he isn't trying to be an ass but he's scared & defensive, and he gets like that when she makes him nervous. like whenever she believes (beyond the sea, revelations, all souls, en ami). it feels like that to me. he's afraid, but this time he thinks he's the problem, their work is the problem. and he kinda said the worst thing he could say to her at that moment. "you were just assigned" — he has no idea how she understood that, how it hurts her. (and she's not thinking about how he means it, what he thinks/feels/fears.) and really, it's because she sucks at just saying the thing as much as he does. it takes them a long time to work out their direct communication. their unspoken communication, the way they work on their cases doesn't translate to their personal relationship. as intimate as their partnership is, working through their own issues takes time and it's those things that hinder them moving forward for so long. ya know?

i think @randomfoggytiger talks about it beautifully here — in depth essay on never again. here they touch on mulder's fear/walls & scully's insecurities/needs. it's a journey!! which they talk about here. and i forget what this one was (lol) but i'm sure i saved it for a reason: a little master post. i love the way foggy breaks things down, especially visually. it's something i could never do.

i also reblogged some other never again posts. not completely on topic but it's all connected!! (you can definitely go through my never again tag to see more probably too!)

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not watching my sick goddaughter and then not wanting to watch her sick brother

*fake names used obviously

Two days ago I got a message from my goddaughter's mom, Nancy, saying that my goddaughter, Natasha, had thrown up at school. The reason Nancy let me know was because her husband would be picking up Natasha's little brother, Dennis, who I watch from 7:30 AM to 3:30 PM most days.

Anyway, I have an extreme, irrational fear of throwing up. So after Nancy let me know Natasha was sick, I was afraid Nancy would then ask if Natasha could come over to my house the next day along with Dennis. Nancy works the night shift so she sleeps during the day and her husband works from 8 AM to 4 PM. I've watched both kids since they were infants. I love them as if they were my own, but when they're sick with a stomach bug, or just throwing up for whatever reason, I would prefer they stayed home away from me so that I can avoid getting what they have lol.

I've always felt bad about this, because they're little and I feel like at my grown age I should be okay with being around them if they've thrown up. Yet, I find myself internally freaking out about getting sick AND I get so paranoid I swear I make myself sick sometimes. Nancy knows this about me.

Sure enough, Nancy calls me and nonchalantly asks if Natasha can come over the next day with Dennis because the school told her Natasha couldn't return for 24 hours. Usually I would give in and say yes because I feel bad saying no, but recently my brother's have reminded me that Nancy only pays me 200 dollars every two weeks to watch Dennis four days a week, eight hours a day. Nancy has acknowledged that she'd have to pay way more at a daycare, so she appreciates what I, and my family do for them.

I love the kids, I really do, but despite having known their parents for so long it feels as though Nancy and her husband only really see me and my family as the help and almost expect us to always be available. Or maybe I'm just projecting my insecurities onto them about not feeling appreciated enough? Which I know is bad, but it's instances like this that have bothered me in the past. You wouldn't take the children to a daycare if they've thrown up right? Or if they're sick with something like covid (which they gave us like two years ago), or if they have a fever, but they've brought them over anyway. It feels mean, you know? Like I love the kids, but I don't want to get sick. Maybe I'm just a horrible, paranoid, awful person and I do think that sometimes. Ha ha, is this an instance in which it would be ok to set a boundary🤔😭

On top of that, I don't charge Nancy extra (nor does she offer to pay) when she asks me to watch the kids on the weekends for a few hours or when she's got time off of work and wants to bring them over. I know this is my fault, because I do not charge her, but again I feel bad asking for more money. My biggest fear for a long time was that she would stop bringing the kids over if I did ask for a little raise or asked her not to bring them over if they were sick, but was always reminded by my brothers that Nancy didn't want to pay for daycare. Still I felt too ashamed to ask for more babysitting money or for Nancy or her husband to keep the kids home sick, and again I feared she would find someone else to watch the children.

Anyway, I told Nancy no. I was very apologetic and reminded her that I get really paranoid when someone is sick throwing up. I told her I just didn't want to get sick because then I'd be out for one to two days. Which would mean I wouldn't be able to watch Dennis and she or her husband would have to miss out on a day of work. Nancy sounded let down, maybe annoyed? I'm not sure, I can't remember. I am kind of spiraling about it  as I'm typing this out now. I feel really bad that I said no, especially because Nancy called me from her car so Natasha heard me say no. Luckily, Natasha was happy that she would get to go spend time with her mom at work. Nancy works in an office as the manager of a warehouse, so it's not like Natasha had to wait in some break room or alone somewhere.

Then tonight I get a message from Nancy saying Dennis threw up, and the panic set in all over again. I feel bad telling her to keep him, even though she eventually offered to keep him home after my many questions: what time did it happen; did he only puke once; does he have a fever; how is he feeling now? I'm sure she's annoyed that I might say "Yes, please keep him." Because that would mean she would either have to stay awake with him and not sleep before work tomorrow night, or that her husband would have to stay home. I think I'm going to tell her to keep him. I feel bad, but I guess not bad enough, huh? I'm trying to justify it to myself, I know, but that's why I'm here. Am I the asshole?

What are these acronyms?

[eleanorose123]

the way my four fav GX characters interact can be so important to me actually lol

individual pair thoughts (not necessarily shippy so I won't tag them as such, but mainly how I've been writing them) under cut

Edo/Judai - Hero nerds to the end. Kind of a one-sided rivalry from Edo's perspective- like Judai still sees Edo as a competent Duelist and loves dueling against him, but Edo is far more...competitive about it lol Still acts smug and superior around Judai but Judai sees right through him and likes to push his buttons. They would watch hero movies and read comic books together if they had the chance, and would have plenty of healthy arguments about which of their favorite heroes would win in a fight. They've got a good friendship going at the end of the day.

Judai/Saiou - UGH, THIS ONE IS SO IMPORTANT TO ME ;;;;; They've got this...understanding of each other, that little to no other people can relate to. The loss of control with power, the feeling of having another person with you even when no one else can see (obvs in Judai's case with Yubel it's much better than Saiou with the Light), the...uh...self loathing thoughts that can sometimes be too much to handle. They catch up with each other over tea every now and again and it's honestly a relief for both of them getting to hear the other living a better life after everything. Might not be each other's closest friend by any means, but they are...special.

Edo/Manjome - The actual rivals, both during work and outside of it lol They both know exactly how to provoke one another and get in a lot of arguments (majority of which Edo wins). But despite this, they're close friends. When they go to Pro Duelist events, they'll usually gravitate towards each other for company sake, even if they'll claim they had "no choice". When the chips are down, they'd look out for each other and are able to take a step back and be real with one another when it matters most.

Saiou/Manjome - The most. Awkward. Duo here. Even outside of their past history together, Manjome just thinks Saiou is...weird. Not that he'd say it out loud, he has a little more tact than that (and doesn't really want to get knocked out by Edo if he heard him). But yeah- he doesn't really want to be left alone with the guy for too long. Saiou, having years and years of experience with this, can absolutely tell Manjome thinks very little of him, making it equally miserable for both of them. They aren't half as bad if they're in a group with other people, but if they're alone. It's the worst lol

[ohbrotherthisblogstinks]

IN VINO VERITAS

ੈ✩‧₊˚ himeno x fem reader

synopsis: you and your hot new friend, who you’re down cataclysmically for, bump coochies in the woods 👉👌

Warnings: 18+, nsfw, fem bodied reader, praise (use of ‘good girl’), consumption of alcohol, dubcon (since you’re both tipsy), semi-public sex (y’all are at a campsite and it’s implied there are other people nearby), oral (f. receiving), tribbing, edging (kinda), choking (kinda), Himeno is the dominant one but not a dom, gentle biting, mention of masturbation

Other warnings: smoking (cigarettes), Himeno calls Aki an emo twink, age gap (ish, Himeno is about 5-6 years older than reader), there is no puke in this fic even though we have the combination of Himeno and alcohol :), reader is a bit needy and a bit of a perv lol

“You okay?” Himeno’s voice pulled you out of your daydream, and you realized you’d been clutching the armrest by the passenger seat, your knuckles white.

“I’m fine,” you said. “I just zoned out.” 

“I was gonna say, I don’t think I’m that bad of a driver.” She flashed you a smile before looking back at the road. “Although come to think of it, I did fail my permit test about four times.”

“That’s reassuring.” You stretched and yawned, glancing at the clock.

“We should be there by six, and that’ll give us enough light to set up the tent. Unless we fuck up and it takes us forever.”

“Which will probably happen, knowing us.”

“That reminds me, if Aki came with us he’d have his shit together and he certainly wouldn’t have gotten us lost.”

“Well, detours are fun.”

“You’re too kind.”

Aki had dipped out of the trip at the last minute, claiming he was feeling under the weather. He urged you and Himeno to go without him, and as a consolation gift, gave you two bottles of wine to sneak into the campsite. They were rather poorly hidden under the back seat, wrapped in one of your old sweatshirts. You glanced back at the contraband to make sure it wasn’t too conspicuous.

“Hey, do me a favor,” Himeno said, tilting her head towards the lighter sticking out of the cup holder. You nodded and reached for it, as she quickly retrieved the cigarette that was behind her ear. Throughout the long drive to the campsite you’d been the one to light her cigarettes for her while she talked your ear off about whatever came to her mind. She liked that you were a good listener, and you liked the sound of her voice, so it was a win-win.

Your crush on Himeno was a little more obvious than you’d like it to be. As she smoked with one hand gripping the wheel, her window rolled down and the wind whipping her hair around, you caught yourself staring. Your mind wandered, making your face grow hot. You wanted to know what the hand around the wheel would feel like around your neck as she feverishly kissed you. It was rather embarrassing to admit, but when you had time alone, thinking about her sometimes resulted in your hand down the front of your pants.

You’d been friends with Himeno for about six months now, after Aki had introduced the two of you, and ever since you met her you’d get butterflies every time you saw her. She sometimes caught you staring and would give you a knowing smirk, making you quickly look away. You had a feeling she was onto you, but you were never confident enough to say anything. After all, she was five or six years your senior, and she was an enigma of a woman. You could never quite figure her out, whether she was flirting with you or just being herself, and it made you far more anxious than you’d like to admit. 

After you and Himeno finally reached the campsite and spent an embarrassingly long time pitching your tent, you poked around in the back of her car for the bottles of wine while she set up two lawn chairs by the light of an old lantern she dug out of her trunk.

“We forgot to bring glasses,” you called over to her, clutching the bottles to your chest as you kicked the car door closed. 

“One bottle is mine and one is yours, then,” she quipped, and flopped down in her chair. You joined her and muscled open the bottles, passing one to her. She nodded thanks and took a long drink. The two of you sat there for God knows how long, talking and talking until you were almost certain you saw the sun beginning to rise. You curled up in your chair and stifled a yawn, and Himeno noticed and giggled.

“Am I boring you?”

“Not yet.” You tried and failed to hold back another yawn.

“Did I ever tell you about how I cut Aki’s hair that one time?”

“You what?” Your eyes widened, and you started laughing.

“Yup. He fell asleep and I was drunk and found a pair of scissors, and the rest is history. He was so mad at me, I felt terrible, but it was fucking hilarious.”

“He never told me about that.”

“I hurt his pride, that’s why.”

You cocked your head to one side. “Were you guys ever…a thing?”

“Oh, God, no. I wanted us to be at one point, but he made it abundantly clear that he wasn’t interested.” 

“You still like him, don’t you?” you teased, prodding her leg with your toe.

“Oh no, that ship has sailed. And it probably sank too.” She laughed heartily and ran a hand through her hair. “I have a bad habit of falling for emo twinks.”

You snorted, making her laugh even harder. 

“Honestly, though, don’t worry about me. I’m no competition if you’re trying to get a piece of that.” She sighed and leaned further back in the chair, setting the bottle on the ground.

You suddenly stood up and lurched over to her, gripping her chair for balance, and sat right down on her lap, putting your arms around her neck and laying your head on her shoulder. 

“Oh?” She raised her eyebrows, surprised. After a few seconds had passed, she timidly placed her hands on your waist. “Did I say something?”

“No,” you sighed, pulling back to look at her. You absentmindedly twirled a lock of her hair between your thumb and forefinger. “Well, kinda.”

“What is it, then?” 

“I have a crush on you.” You hung your head, looking down into your lap. You couldn’t look her in the eyes, you couldn’t stomach it. You heard her sigh, and you prepared yourself for the worst. After a few excruciating seconds, she finally spoke.

“I know,” she said softly, lifting her hand to gently pinch your cheek. “It’s very obvious.” Your eyes widened. 

“Is it really?” You looked back up at her, and she nodded. There was a glint in her eye that wasn’t there before. 

“Are you gonna do anything about it?” she asked you, that same knowing smirk spreading across her face. 

You kissed her without hesitation, making her giggle against your lips. You felt her squeeze your waist and pull you a little closer until you were snug against her. She gently laid her hand on the back of your head and slid her tongue against yours, making a soft moan slip out of your mouth. 

She pulled away and looked at you quizzically, still smirking. You stared in disbelief. You’d really done it, you’d kissed her. It could only get so much better or so much worse.

“I’m sorry,” you blurted out, still in a trance. 

“Don’t apologize.”

She suddenly snaked an arm underneath your thighs and picked you up bridal style, making you squeal, and you held on tight as she carried you in the direction of the tent. She smelled like sweat and sunscreen and smoke, but in a way that was strangely pleasant to you. She grunted as she struggled with the flap of the tent, and you felt yourself beginning to slip.

“If you drop me, I swear to God,” you giggled. 

“Fuckin’ help me, then!”

After a comically long struggle with the tent flap that did indeed involve being dropped by Himeno, she stumbled into the tent and pulled you down onto the cot with her, making you laugh even harder. She zipped the door closed, and crawled over to straddle your waist.

“Are you putting me to bed?” You squinted up at her, your eyes adjusting to the dim light inside the tent. 

“Yeah, something like that.” 

“Are you gonna kill me or something?” You started laughing again, blindly reaching for her, and you felt her grab your hand and squeeze it. She leaned in closer to you, hovering over you and smiling, her hair brushing against your face. You blinked up at her, doe-eyed.

“You’re so cute,” she marveled.

“You think so?”

“Mmm-hmm. And you’re all mine.” She leaned down to press kisses to your neck, gently nipping your skin every now and then and eliciting whimpers from you. Her fingertips felt cool and soothing brushing against your flushed skin, and you felt her tug at the hem of your shirt. You raised your arms to help her remove it, and she resumed her kisses once she tugged it off you. 

“You’re not wearing a bra.”

“Brilliant, Holmes.”

She snort-laughed and poked you in the rib, making you yelp. 

“You have pretty tits.”

“Thank you?”

“No, I mean it. They’re cute.” She brushed some hair out of your eyes and smiled at you. “I want them in my mouth.”

You burst out laughing again, thankful that the dim light was hiding the raging blush spreading across your cheeks. Himeno gave your neck one more gentle nip before moving her hand up to cup your left breast. She inched further down and swirled her tongue around your nipple, making you gasp. 

“You’re so fucking cute,” she whispered between kisses, and you felt her start to move further down, her fingers slipping under the waistband of your shorts. You almost immediately lifted your hips to help her pull them down, and she chuckled at your eagerness. 

Once she’d completely undressed you, she sat back on her heels and ran a hand through her hair, looking down at you with hazy eyes. 

“Please touch me more,” you blurted out, reaching out and gripping her arm as she ghosted her fingertips across your bare skin, making you shiver with anticipation. 

“What do you want me to do?” she asked you, her lips curling up into a cheeky grin. She continued brushing her fingertips against your skin, just barely touching you and avoiding where you needed her most. 

Your breathing had gotten shaky and erratic, and you couldn’t think of anything other than her, the sound of her voice, the intensity of her touch. You looked up at her with pleading eyes, your grip on her arm tightening.

“Please fuck me,” you whispered, and she smiled and leaned down to peck your forehead.

“Good girl. That’s what I wanted to hear.” She gently spread your legs and crawled down to settle in between them. She hooked her arms around your thighs and looked up to you inquisitively, silently asking your consent. You nodded vigorously, making her laugh. 

She was so close to you now, her grip on your hips making your skin tingle and her hot breath fanning against your aching pussy. You let out a surprised whimper when she finally flattened her tongue against your pussy, licking a thick stripe all the way up to your clit. She continued, making you squirm and whine and grind against her face each time she flicked her tongue against your clit. 

It was close to the best feeling you’d ever felt, the strong grip of her hands on your hips, the sloppy kisses she’d give your clit when your thighs tensed around her head.  She pulled away right before you could get your satisfaction, making you huff and whine in frustration.

“You gotta be quiet, baby.” She rested her head on your thigh and smiled up at you, gently rubbing your lower stomach. 

“I-I’m sorry, I- fuck!” She resumed going down on you, making you squirm and cry out. You brought a shaky hand up to your mouth, and grabbed a messy handful of her hair with the other. Your thighs shook and your back arched as you came, your eyes rolling back as you tried not to scream from the pleasure. She finally pulled away when you gave her hair a harsh tug, and crawled up to kiss you, silencing your whimpers. 

“You okay?” she asked you upon pulling away, brushing some hair away from your sweaty forehead. You nodded, your chest still heaving as you tried to catch your breath. She pecked your forehead and sat back up, straddling your waist. 

“I wanna try something,” she whispered, and your eyes grew wide as she peeled off her shirt and started to unhook her bra. “It’ll feel really good. I promise.” You nodded.

“Don’t just stare, help me,” she giggled, noticing your gaze. You quickly propped yourself up and started to unbutton her shorts, which she flung into the corner of the tent along with her underwear after some shuffling around in the dark. After pushing your legs apart, she inched closer to you, and lifted your right leg so your calf rested on her shoulder. 

“Stay like this for me, okay?” You nodded obediently, awaiting her next move. She gently ran a hand over your lower stomach and lowered her hips to meet yours.

You gasped and grabbed her hand as she started grinding against you, and she chuckled quietly, giving your hand a tight squeeze. 

“I told you.”

She gripped your leg with one hand as the movement of her hips became more rhythmic, letting the other wander over your bare skin. She brushed her fingertips across your stomach, then your tits, then gently placed her hand around your neck and squeezed ever-so-slightly, at which you arched your back and let out a breathy moan. She chuckled and maintained her gentle grip on your throat, her gaze fixed on the way your face contorted in pleasure with each thrust of her hips.

“That feel good?” she asked you breathlessly, knowing you could barely form the words to answer her. You could only nod and whine in response, making her lips curl upwards into a satisfied smile. She could tell you were close by the way you were breathing, the way the muscles of your thighs and calves and stomach tensed as she touched you. She was quite close herself too, sweating and flushed and barely able to control the movement of her hips.

You clawed at her arm, your eyes wide and almost frantic, and she held eye contact with you as you came undone beneath her, firmly pressing her hand over your mouth to muffle your whines. Her own orgasm soon followed, and she let out a low moan, her fingernails digging into your calf and making you whine in pain and pleasure. 

She pressed sloppy, open-mouthed kisses to your calf as she rode out her orgasm, then gently pulled away from you and rolled onto your back. You instinctively reached out for her, and she pulled you in, sighing contently. You wrapped your arms around her and snuggled tighter against her.

“You okay?” she whispered, smoothing out your messy hair. You nodded and pulled back a little to look at her, smiling with hazy eyes. 

“Can I take you out for breakfast tomorrow?” you asked, resting your forehead against hers. 

“I would love that. I’m paying though, you can’t change my mind.”

You huffed in protest. “Fine, as long as you let me be big spoon.” 

She grinned.

“Deal.”

[bhobbiel]

Yashiro and Kageyama and cigerettes

Both Yashiro and Kageyama only started smoking after high school. (At least in my personal experience the people I know irl who smoke cigarettes start high school or before).

Because they start smoking after 18 ish it stands out to me as uncommon and to show a turning point in each characters' lives.

---

For Yashiro: It feels pretty clear and in line with his other characteristics that he smokes. He doesn't care about his health or the longevity life that much (he cares even less during the four years of the timeskip). He specifcally is shown smoking once he is in his mid 30s initiated in yakuza. Never in flashbacks (18ish) even when he already knows Misumi

Also he looks handsome regardless of if he smokes. Smoking doesn't seem to affect his looks -too- much. And I think he cares about his looks? He files his nails, wears -three- piece suits, and styles his hair consistently.

(often smoking makes your teeth color and skin texture change. I know thinking about that for a drama romance MANGA of an intentionally handsome character is overkill but yk lol)

----

For Kageyama: maybe its about showing his older age. Yashiro often calls him an old man despite being the same age. I am not sure if this means Yashiro definitely looks young for his age or not.

Kageyama is definitely a little bit of a foil appearance wise to Yashiro in how they style themselves.

Kageyama does not style his hair, has stubble, glasses, and dresses more casually minus his doctor coat. He even rides a bike while Yashiro is chauffeured around.

But he is a -doctor- so that is interesting because smoking is very bad for you. I would not expect a med student turned doctor to start smoking cigs after high school. He did not start smoking cigs immediately right after his dad passed which I would have understood more (as an immediate coping mechanism after tradegy)

But a middle aged man who is scruffy, smokes cigs, and "talks to his lover like an old man" does envoke a specific image. Maybe smoking emphasizes the image of someone who is middle age "stuck in their ways" and not likely to change.

But obviously Kageyama has some kind of accidental rizz pulling both Yashiro and Kuga loool. And he is handsome just scruffy which certain people like more than clean cut (and vice versa)

Even though he is a little cranky and socially dense. But there is a caringness underneath his cranky snarkiness.

----

Also interesting Yashiro became someone who appearance wise is intentionally "put together" but he harms people.

Versus Kageyama is a bit more scruffy but helps and saves people.

I feel like them smoking later then when usually people start emphasized how time and physicality is shown in Saezuru.

Slow moving, trauma following you, and your physicality clearly changing with your experiences

[omarera]

Breaking down the Aftonbladet article putting into Swedish context, at least my perspective. Markus is viewing the award as a music award and he has strong opinions on what his music taste is. People should vote as he wants lol. So a positive thing g here is that Omar seems to have a lot of votes. He is always very sarcastic and often have one line slaps sticks liners in his articles and is always straight forward. Markus wants it to be a his taste of “best music “ award but in reality fans are voting based on their own taste and dedication to vote. He needs to change his view of what Rockbjörnen is and why people vote.

Long post ahead…

Some nominations are the joke of the year. Doesn't just stand out. It sticks the eyes.

Ok, I have a few questions. La Gunilla? Fröken Snusk? Where did the musical taste go, dear audience? Is it out drunkenly riding a valley horse?

Since Rockbjörnen is Aftonbladet's prize, I should probably hold back.

It will be such a bad atmosphere otherwise.

The taste is different. After rain comes sun. It's always worse in Gällivare. Take pastors in Knutby with a grain of salt, and so on.

But one of the nominations doesn't just stand out. It sticks out the eyes of sensitive people.

Gunilla Persson? What is she doing here? Her contribution in the Melodifestivalen, "I won't shake (la la Gunilla)", was quite a lot. But "Breakthrough of the year"? What to say about it? Hawk tuah?

Nominating her is like watching the pole vault final at the Olympics, watching Armand Duplantis break a new world record and then giving the Gold of Achievement to a falcon.

I interpret everything as Aftonbladet's dear readers trolling us. If La Gunilla is the breakthrough of the year, you might as well give the bear to Babsan's chorizo ​​hit "Give me a Spaniard", even though the song was released in 2011.

That would be about as reasonable.

For context: Babsan you all know 🫠 but Gunilla Persson is known for being a “Hollywood wife reality star” and she is just loved or hated and just a strong character. She is not a music artist and the actual new breakthrough music artists gets in her shadow.

Another nomination makes me demand that Sweden should introduce a driver's license test before people can express themselves about music. Otherwise, there is a great risk that many people will accelerate backwards towards a red light on the left side of the traffic. That is, cogs in the run-up by voting for Fröken Snusk.Her mix of knight fun and epadunk in a pink robber's hat would only have been a given winner if Rockbjörnen introduced the category "Joke of the Year".

Then so. Now it feels easier to breathe.

For context: Fröken Snusk performes in a pink mask and have songs like “Ride me like a Dalahorse” and “the Gynecological”. Fröken Snusk kind of translates into Miss Naughty. She is though very popular among kids and teens mostly. A guy behind her pulls all the strings and she basically sings the songs. She wants to take a bigger role and is starting to change her image. The song she did in Mello she was a co-author on and she was also the winner of this year’s “The mask” showing off she has great voice. Taking of the mask having her pink mask on. Some songs were also taken down from Spotify due allegations of manipulation of streams. But many love her. Others hate her.

Otherwise, this year's gala seems to be a classic duel at dawn between two relatively young men: Omar Rudberg and Benjamin Ingrosso.Omar can win four Rockbears and Benjamin three, which is due, among other things, to the fact that "Benji" has not performed at Gröna Lund this year and therefore cannot be nominated in the category "Grönan live act of the year".

There is nothing wrong with Rudberg, but if the prize is still about music, Ingrosso should sweep home everything. This summer he took on a new giant leap as a stage performer.

For context: I won’t riot against Markus, so if that’s what you want to read, move on. He acknowledges that it is a duel between them and he has probably seen the numbers of votes. That is positive news for me. There are not just Omar and Beji nominated and Omar and Benji seems to be close in voter numbers (if that’s the reason he writes the article and want to prime Benji winning)

Stating “there is nothing wrong with Omar, but if the prize is still about music, Ingrosso should sweep home everything”.

Music is subjective, and Markus saying there is nothing wrong with Omar is like a compliment coming from him. I prefer Omar’s music and we all know he is not recognized is Sweden as any of us thinks he deserves. I fully agree with that. I also agree that Benji is the biggest artist this year and he has taken leaps both performance wise and with his music. He has done an outsold European tour ( similar to the one Omar will do) and he has had several hits dominating the charts with a little bit of, for him, music style and quality. He has also had a very successful summer tour ( designed by the same person who designed Beyonces stage performance). He has had arena show in Sweden, very few Swedish artists pull that off. He IS the biggest Swedish male artist atm. So I understand Markus viewpoints. Omar is still in the beginning of his career, he has just started performing on stages and has his first tour announced. It’s not possible to compare them. Benji has so much more experience and has released so much more music. Omar is already great but he will have more music coming out with better producers and he will ofc evolve even more on stage. I see many compare Benji with Harry Styles and that’s where my references goes as well. He kind of has similar stage clothes and also the reading signs and having people proposing on his stage. So he interacts with the audience in a similar way.

The trolling part when it comes to Benji is that Benji has been/is by some hated just bc he is a nepo kid and his family. He had a FB group with 9000 members called “we who hate Benjamin” when he was 9yo. And yes he has benefited a lot from his family background and the benefits that comes with that but he also gets hate. And he still has that feeling with him it seems and seem to consider himself as a kind of an underdog needing to prove himself. So him being the biggest artist atm, and if he doesn’t win some will see it as people voted on other artist to make him not win and build on the narrative that it is bc he is a Wahlgren/Ingrosso. He also gets votes for that reason ofc, people loving him and his family, rather than people loving his music.

But all together, La Gunilla and Fröken Snusk might win, loved by the people but maybe not the best music. Omar is loved and have dedicated fans even though Benji is the biggest artist this year. And has the music that has been recognized. Markus seem to prefer his music, I prefer Omar’s music.

Regarding the trolling history for Rockbjörnen, last year Hooja won four categories, they are also liked and loved by kids and people all ages I guess, they wear masks and do fun songs with kind of silly lyrics. Listen below. But they were also “outed” and their names and life’s were written about by Aftonbladet last year which was quite controversial since they wanted to be anonymous for their sake and also their families. They live north in Sweden and lead somewhat just normal family life. So, that was also probably one reason people voted for them. A way of trolling as well.

[erikahenningsen]

Headcanons for a Regina that goes to college but breaks contact with everyone from high school for at least all four years. How do you picture her? If you can't picture her ever doing that then forget i asked lol

In my heart I refuse to believe she would break contact with Shane (or Cady) but we don't have to talk about it

I think that she wouldn't necessarily break contact because she was on bad terms with everyone but more out of a dislike of who she was while she was in middle/high school, especially sixth grade-junior year and she feels like she can't really get away from it without fully starting over. Maybe she even goes private on her social media.

She goes to a large university somewhere far away from Evanston, maybe UCLA or NYU where she can blend in

Regina has a lot of trust issues after everything that happened junior year and really internalized a lot of the things her classmates said to/about her when they turned on her, compounded by the guilt she still feels about what she did to Janis, so she's kind of hesitant in making friends

She eventually develops a small but close group of friends that she feels sure, for the first time in her life, actually like her for her and not because they want something from her

This gives her the confidence to finally start exploring her sexuality after shoving her attraction to girls down for so many years (as a side note I think she felt guilty about her sexuality after bullying Janis her for being a lesbian so she just decided to ignore it until she could get away from NSHS)

I think she also starts experimenting in other ways—maybe she cuts her hair, maybe she gets a tattoo, maybe she dyes her hair pink, maybe all three!

Regina does become somewhat notorious in the lesbian circles at her school for hooking up with girls and then being messy about it but as she gets more confident in her sexuality she has her first girlfriend and they go to Regina's first pride together

I think she's still dramatic and messy but she mellows out a lot once she doesn't have the pressure of the expectations of people who have known her all her life. Like in high school, she didn't know which parts of her were a performance and which were real and that was a lot of why she acted so insane.

Regina, rumored to be dead or perhaps in jail, reemerges at the five-year NSHS reunion looking like this and everyone loses their minds

Sleepover Saturday

[alicepao13]

Hudson and Rex S03E09 - Grave Matters - PART B

"I told you departmental policy, Sarah". Literally 15 seconds later: "Maybe if I dip into Camilla's college savings..."

Joe: "You could lose your house". Sarah: "I know but this is Charlie we're talking about".

What do you mean you're going to search what kind of sprinkler systems are on this time of year? How could that be an amount small enough worthy of investigation?

Not the wheezing sound!

Wrong grave, guys.

Regardless of grief and whatnot, that woman and her husband were psychotic. If you really think that the police has done you such a grave disservice during the course of the investigation on your son (which they hadn't), then just shoot the guy. Don't torture him like that.

If tortured, then why so sexy?

"I'm giving you hope and then I'm gonna take it away". I mean, this is seriously fucked up. Imagine the entire thought process behind that. You can murder someone in less than a second. But imagine the thought process in all this. The lack of regret. And they've had him for hours, not one of them felt remorseful enough to let him go.

"So you can feel what my son felt in that coffin after you botched his investigation". Okay, but he wasn't the one who did it, not to mention that it was ultimately the fact that they paid the ransom that killed the kid (which they don't know). Why torture him like this?

"What have you done?" Ugh, I love the moment where he realizes that they probably buried another innocent person. His reactions and everything are show on point.

"The judges and lawyers were covering up for SJPD's mistakes". Okay, that might happen, at least from the police's side. It's rare that the entire judiciary system helps with a coverup (unless we're talking about countries like Greece). Still, not what happened here.

No comment. Just enjoy.

"You wouldn't talk to us even after the trial was over". That's not a crime punishable by torture and death!

"All to protect your precious reputation". lol what the fuck are you on about? Dude seriously solves crimes with a dog! I'd expect the entire police aside from those working close to him (who I assume respect him) to be calling him Ace Ventura.

"I didn't want you to know that paying the ransom triggered Noel's death". See? Next time tell the people everything, no matter how callous it may sound. Ruthlessness is mercy upon ourselves.

How did you miss, man? It wasn't that much of a distance.

"I smell Charlie!"

In such episodes, they always end up digging with their hands out of desperation. A dog pulling the rope, though, that's new. Not necessarily what I'd put him in charge of, given that he has four paws.

Found him!

This is a friendly hug. Also, look at Charlie staring at the sky. He really thought he would never see it again.

You two are never beating the "in love with each other since at least S3" allegations.

Charlie burying his face on Rex's fur, saying "Hi". I'm fine.

"You and your husband buried Patrick Gillespi" What about you, Charlie? Also, this is highly inappropriate, having the victim of the abduction interrogate his abductor.

"The bad news is that you're going to jail for a very long time". No, that's actually great news.

"I'm really sorry". Apology not accepted!

"Why did you go in with her? Are you okay? Can I bite her?"

"How'd it go?" "About the same as it always goes". Oh, do you get kidnapped often? She's not asking about a regular case.

"I heard about the money. And what you were willing to do for me." "It wasn't just me. Joe too." Not to minimize Joe's input but the minute the ransom demand was heard, Sarah was already on the phone.

"Thank you." "You would have done the same for us." "Well, I don't know. I really do like the house I just bought." Stop it. Also, I'd love to see the opposite happen too.

"I didn't think we could do this anymore." Well, it's not every day where they have to dig you out of a grave, Charlie.

Even more looks.

"To this team, and the fact that we're all still breathing." Who would have thought that being a cop in St. John's would be roughly as dangerous as a Mission Impossible movie?

Exposure therapy. Count the traumatic cases, by the way. They're starting to pile up. Keep that in mind.

This is one of my favorite episodes. It's too bad they never mention the whole ordeal again. What deity do I offer a sacrifice to in order to get this kind of angst again?