#which is like. coincidental for sure but
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blehhh. my gerd has been flaring up really horribly these last few weeks and it's honestly starting to make me feel pretty depressed :[ it sucks to feel sick all the time!!!
#maddie meows#i'm just trying to keep reminding myself that it's been a lot worse before and i still got better then#so i just need to keep being as kind to my body as i can in the meantime#if nothing else it helps with stress lol. WHICH IS CERTAINLY A FACTOR FOR ME...#i wish it didn't feel like my body likes punishing me for being alive so often#i don't want to see myself as an adversary#it's especially hard bc this specifically has gotten worse the better my mental health has gotten overall#which is like. coincidental for sure but#it can still sometimes feel like some sort of retaliation against my enjoyment of life. really sad!!#chronic illnesses are hard. i try to keep my chin up but that doesn't mean it doesn't suck for me sometimes!!!
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I've been watching old Project Runway episodes and my take is: whatever they were paying the fat models to participate in the "real woman" challenges just so the contestants could throw dramatic fits over how much they despise fat bodies? It was not enough.
#actually maybe worse than the dramatic fits were when it was more subtle#like the one that really upset me which was the bridesmaid dress challenge in season 8?#where they decided to be EXTRA cruel and lined up the bridesmaids and let the DESIGNERS pick one by one#and they all picked the few size-2 women first and then it went in perfect ascending weight order after the model-shaped ones were taken#(except for the thin woman they picked right before they hit the two 14+ women who was COINCIDENTALLY I AM SURE the darkest-skinned)#(whole other conversation on that front)#and Heidi acted performatively clueless about why the two bigger women were the last ones left#the contestants were all lying snakes about it too imo#'oh i just didn't want the worst...dress. She had the worst dress' LIAR. COWARD#AT LEAST BE UPFRONT ABOUT IT YOU UNCREATIVE DICK
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love when this is referred to as the gifted kid website. shockingly my mental disorders made me mentally disordered and school never really vibed with that so. couldn’t be me
#ppl always talking about their whatever grade reading level and how many books they’d read as kids and im just over here like🧍🏽#I’ve never been actually bad at english or reading but I couldn’t focus on reading books to save my fucking life#I hated those sheets where you had to read like a certain number of books or whatever over the course of a semester or the year or whatever#my GATE test scores for english were super high but my math was bad enough that I never qualified#and adhd made me not even perform well in English half the time because I couldn’t pay attention I couldn’t read long books I couldn’t turn#in my assignments or if I did they were late and etc etc etc#don’t get me started with math#I was the worst in my class in third grade at minute math and never made it to the levels of minute math my classmates did#(they posted results on the wall for everyone to see)#and in 6th grade I was put into an additional remedial math class#throughout middle-high school I was at the level of most classmates in terms of the classes I took but that’s only because I was not allowe#to fail and was put through absolute fucking hell with a billion tutors and grueling hours of extra work from them and blah blah blah#like I remember how I felt in those tutoring sessions and half the time I actually wanted to cry.#I didn’t start doing solidly genuinely Good in school until senior year of high school.#not coincidentally around the same time I started taking adderall I think#I had accommodations by 9th grade but they didn’t do that much except for the function that let me turn in assignments up to 2 days late#without penalty. which i had teachers question sometimes and i had to pull the Yeah it’s Literally Against The Law to not allow me this car#anyway. point is. i was never in the gate program and most of my friends were and it was mostly adhd related#adhd is considered such a quirky nothing disorder nowadays that I don’t even like mentioning I have it really. because what people think of#when I say the term is Not what i actually dealt with and made school torturous and made my parents lash out at me for things and etc etc#depression and dysphoria did not help either. but I digress#I’m not sure why im making this post#kibumblabs
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Actually insane that so much of my life rn is built around the butterfly effect of a niche comic I read 2 years ago
#phonogram. is the comic. obviously#that and also coincidentally reading it right after seeing mcr in concert and having a life changing revelation there LMAOO#but phonogram is what got me chronically and severely into britpop and the indie rock scene in my city#which has led to. my dj gig. and possibly another job rn? and literally like the vast majority of my music related choices which make up a#vast majority of my choices can be traced back to the comic or the concert. LOL!#like I thought I was gonna make movies for sure 2 years ago music wasn’t even on my radar as a career possibility#warlock wartalks
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:P
#i finally did smth w my bored as fuck want to create state lol#lyric from close to you by gracie a/brams the way i was just looking thru lyrics and saw this#and im like idk what that means but i like the words#the rest of these tags are unrelated af lol#yeo what the fuck do the j/atp boys have canonical birthdays#the way im like going crazy trying to find if it's canon or just a tumblr made up thing LMAO#me planning this j/atp watch party w my freidns for july 7 (which was coincidental)#(and lowkey for my bday but theyre busy on my actual bday)#and i was like wait i'm pretty sure july 7th is literally alex's bday#but i cannot tell if actualy canon from what i have found that says july 7 for alex idk what the SOURCE is lol#it def is on tumblr at least tho lmao#bro why does doing this kind of for my bday make me like embarrassed or smth lmfao 💀#like ughhhh i wanna hang out w my friends for my bday that's so weird and embarrassing euhghhh LMAO#anyway i'm so excited to reignite al my embarrassing j/atp crazy fan things w my other crazy j/atp fan friend LOL#i rewatched to a point where i was reciting the lines back to the screen and doing choreography 💀💀💀 so#i'm so excited tho LMFAO i haven't watched in sooooo long 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#i'm literally gonna be unable to stop smiling and/or crying#if i'm in a crying mood i will def be crying bc i miss them so much#if not i will literally just be uncontrollably smiling the whole fucking time#i'm coming home baybee LMAO#(jk maybe that would be like rewatching gIee for the first time in a long time . which still has to happen ig lol)#jeanne talks
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#two lewsks today#i am on the train to rosh hashanah dinner at my cousins which is coincidentally what i was doing last year when i first listened to seiyoku.#i was not sure if i liked it at first and now it is my most played album of all time on the spotify account ive had for nearly a decade.
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Girl I was just double checking s26 status and. And found that this aired on the 14th and. that cannot be coincidence, surely
#bits of banter#South Park#style#THE 14TH#SERIOUSLY???#ik they’re probably just playing episodes in order like yeah that happens but. THATS TOO COINCIDENTAL#sure vday was over a week ago now which means I’m late to it but#the PICTURE TOO CMON NOW#STYLE REAL
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Andrew Davies, Othello (2001) // Antoine de Saint-Exupery, Manon, Ballerina // Richard Siken, The Torn-Up Road // Sue Zhao, I Still Loved You // Nerdy Girl, Hate Me // sadoeuphemist, The Scorpion and the Frog // Madeline Miller, Song of Achilles // The Mountain Goats, How to Love a Swamp Creature // New Order, Bizarre Love Triangle // Jane Heller Levi, Waiting for this Story to End Before I Begin Another // Lavalove, Luck in Love // Sea Ghosts, Cowboy Hat // Aka Akasaka, Kaguya-sama Love is War Ch 231
#kaguya sama spoilers#iino & osaragi#kaguya sama manga#iino x osaragi#the more i make these the more unhinged the tags get lol#on my earlier reads i thought osaragi's rant was kinda like when shinomiya insults shirogane in order to persuade fujiwara away from him#but now i also think it's similar to when iino tells shirogane all the reasons she shouldn't like ishigami only to cry at the end#what do jolene the stone bowl arc and nerdy girl's hate me have in common#they were all supposed to be straight but it doesn't take much to think that they're very much not#seriously the lyrics of hate me are literally about the singer taking the boy that her friend loves#but she spends most of the song screeching to her friend as if burning bridges and knowing her friend hates her for sure is the actual poin#it's the same idea from torn-up road where they do something self-destructive to know for certain that it will be unrequited#hate me is a banger go listen to it! but anyway#the scorpion story fits not only bc of the 'nature' part but bc sadoeuphemist writes it as a loop#the story usually plays out badly but the loop continues anyway which works for knowing the bad ending but being unable to give up#against her better judgement#coincidentally othello is iino's character song although it's about the board game not the shakespeare play#but there's an essay on othello that talks about mimetic desire and that sums up what i was thinking in an older post really well#also fyi torn-up road and othello are a male narrator talking about a man just to clear that up#web weaving
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a decade later sure i'll put it into Text Post "tumblr user claims: plausibly may feasibly" form, starting with these classic screenshots i still have saved
this being dialogue from 2015's always watching: a marble hornets story, which is like hey this is a pretty well produced indie venture & you can sure like sit through it even if you then never watch it again b/c it's still kind of overly on the beaten path & "i'm not sure this choice is justified in much of anything" (see: bizarrely omnipresent thread of a love triangle just to be There; typical Mental Patient(tm) Harbinger; several real marked More Is Less instances arguably) that is still a better time than other random horror material i've seen & hated vs. only mostly been underwhelmed by but in an Overall Shrug way alone. yeah imdb's 4.7 out of 10 seems fair enough if you consider like 5 stars truly middle of the road solid if forgettable vs that anything < 7 stars is for [Bad!] or whatever
anyways the main character is named milo & indeed the creator(s) / actors / writers troy joseph & tim were involved in the production at all: tim at least by being the first step in doug jones's casting by reaching out directly (online), but troy & joseph also via Some writing, like in that slender game sequel also: not the Primary creators / writers, but still officially involved in the creative process at all. & i knew of them & they knew of me by this time & in a [source: dude just trust me] style of way, i, a tumblr user, am like "i think milo alwayswatching Could be named after me, milo unproduciblesmackdown. lol." b/c also like yeah i can take it on the chin if it's a coincidence, which is also likely. great name & it's just not being used enough in fictional & nonfictional people's names. you might also be aware that some role in tribetweIve is named milo (maybe the main guy. i never watched it) so you might also speculate it's named after that guy, which seems plausible also, But: afaik there are no other similar plausible shoutouts at all, to that series or to emh which was just as majorly like One Of Those 3 Biggest Online Series. may or may not add a grain of salt to take it with. like my own "of course, there's a grain of salt in 'milo just like me milo, and Uncoincidentally?' b/c how wouldn't there be. a name people have"
the dude just trust me argument: distilling it down to "i went to their first convention & then the same one the next year, & in these experiences i Know they knew of me from that + also online, where people knew my name was milo as well" and "it seems feasible enough it's an easter egg Not Coincidence that i first knew this character's name happened to also be milo b/c someone who experienced a clip sent me an ask about it, so they assumed it was a possible actual connection too lol." and, of course, it might be a fun coincidence after all. but i'm still like "yeah no it Could be a funny little shoutout to me specifically for real" and mean it and, again, i can endure it if i'm completely wrong. b/c who could care, and also b/c it's so funny that the character is a guy who basically just is like "i am going to have a bad attitude. b/c of the insistent tiresome love triangle thing. well now I'm insistently tiresome" and fucking everything up but like, sure. exasperating epic fail protagonists
the only relevance i think it has besides "to me, b/c i can go haha yeah. that might be like: just like me!!" is that it's Also plausible b/c yeah marble hornets Is the kind of series that might go "this could be an easter egg about some queer autistic tumblr user we know about" lmao, its Inherent Queerness both re: the material and in the creators' knowledge like yep that's how our Appreciators skew! like it's low stakes to be like [lol, Me. perhaps] b/c it's obviously of zero importance like it adds no info, i'm just some rando queer fan from back in the day, but it's this potential Fun Fact that's funny to know & it's about "yeah like they knew i was trans back then too & that it was like, amidst the MH Fans, like nobody's cishet man (shaggy rogers voice)" Gay Rights!
#marble hornets#It's Possible And Someone Should Say It#and like fr i'm saying it with a swagful humility b/c yeah ofc it feels like an overreach to be like ME Milo???? but it could be fr#and ofc it's just a funny little detail If So so it's also really not that much of a reach b/c nobody else could care one way or another#the only possible Reactions beyond ''main character named milo? this has zero extra meaning for me''#is Me; Specifically going [gasp!] (which i did anyways b/c Pointing! & b/c yeah thee whole time it's like It Could Be Just Like Me Fr)#and tribetwelveheads going ''like as in tribetweIve?'' which like still maybe but gotta keep it real with you chief: Less Likely#it's funny if i'm right And it's funny if i'm wrong so like yeah ofc i'll Just Say It. i can endure in good humour if Knowing no it's not#and like i could just ask. but in my prior chitchatting with [Yeah We Know Of Each Other] quadruple A status#(amicable and/or allied acquaintance) like it just hasn't ever been much or really At All abt marble hornets or anything else ''official''#yeah i Could barge into tim's dms like HEY do you MAYBE KNOW this trivia?? about MEEE??? but like. i'm not gonna lmao#i'm gonna be like: post more new kittycat pics worstie!!!! if anything.#or be like ''you're So right. recommend skinamarink to all past present future marble hornets fans'' hell yeah king#(as someone who Hypothetically enjoys horror; thus in actual practice virtually always hates horror. That Fr! sm good fckg food)#anyways like it can't possibly matter. sure just as plausibly a ''haha no it Is coincidental'' situation like & so i can endure that though#it's most plausible thanks to the [i did manage to make it to their first convention! a lot of fun. & i bought their mask]#like this fact was 99% irrelevant to Anyone Else; e.g. anyone online then or now#but it did boost making me a specific person the main creative / production trio guys Knew Of lol. being a queer autistic fan can do that#i also never use these screenshots lol but i did save them & still like just now stumble across them like oh yeah that guy! that Mystery!#we can keep it up for that mystique & ambiguity. & b/c again i have no cause to barge in at an A.A.A.A. like Answer My Trivia Boy!!#this would Also be funny but for the sake of any actual 4A rapport i will not be attempting it for Detached Jests#(conveniently this prevents me from bravely enduring taking it on the chin anyways! hence casually posting a Fun Fact. we'll never know)#also remembering i don't even have my name being milo on my blog header. But It Is
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dealing with the insurance company and then the clinic itself via a "health advocate" who agrees that this looks shady and she's not seeing the same thing on her end that i'm seeing on the bill is just. exactly what i wanted to spend my work break doing. fantastic. fun times.
#adulting#listen i know it's a whiny cliche but adulting fucking sucks#she's still suggesting that it looks like i still owe $50 which i am quite sure i don't unless the argument is that when the claim was sent#i had not met my deductible because the claim was apparently sent five months after the visit immediately after my insurance year restarted#like literally two days after that date and hmm. no. i do not believe that is legitimate.#i do not believe that it took five months to process a claim that somehow COINCIDENTALLY went through right after my#deductible restarted#that's shady as shit and i don't buy it for one goddamned second
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https://www.tumblr.com/garciapimienta/759241467554414592/letting-gundogan-gomaking-him-leave-will-be-one
our best player who stripped in every big game lol we have the highest press in europe this season and gundogan can’t run please be serious the issue is how it was handled not the fact that a 34 year old is leaving
every flick game has been better without him on the field he kills counters and can’t press
sorry anon but if pep guardiola, who coaches the team that’ss arguably one of the best in the world rn, and that very much requires fit players who can run and press, thinks he’s good enough, then he’s good enough for us too
#‘he can’t press he can’t counter’ sure he can#can he do it at the upper level for 90 minutes every match? no. but we don’t really need him to do that if our game plans are well developed#he was one of our top 3 players last season he’s one of our only consistently fit midfielders and he has an excellent mentality#aside from obviously just being overall great#so yeah I think barça could use someone like him especially when you have him for decent money#you know who we didn’t need (especially if we couldn’t register)? dani olmo#coincidentally gundogan is leaving so he can be signed up hmmm I wonder which idiot didn’t do a good job#ilkay gundogan#fcb#barça#fc barcelona#ask#anon#answered
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jokes aside i do think this is a fascinating planet
#i think the southern hemisphere is what starts breaking away first but im not entirely sure#i would aim my ship for the north pole if only so i dont lose it so quickly again#but alas i cant figure out which way is north when piloting the ship so#anyways#im gonna head in the wuantum library thing#im not too sure but the like weird gravity stair wall thingy MIGHT be broken naturally as opposed to from the fucking meteor shower#so i might have to just fly up via jetpack#another burning question i have is how does the planet come back together#bc the planet wasnt always broken up? right? it has to reform somehow?#it cant coincidentally be breaking apart the day of a supernova and the end of this particular solar system#right#so something must reverse it#adding to that how the fuck does the sand hourglass thing on the twin planets work#what makes the sand move from one planet to the other#how does it do that#how much time is it#<-burning questions i have#michi tag
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how do i tell debt collectors IT HAS BEEN AN ACTUAL DECADE SINCE THE PERSON YOU ARE LOOKING FOR HAS HAD THIS NUMBER
#and also for over half of that decade they were harassing a minor about it#also I'm like. 99% sure that she's fucking dead. and has been for several years now.#which is coincidentally when these calls started getting more and more frequent.
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𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 ☀︎
Rockstar!gojo x art student!femreader
synopsis- satoru gojo fell in love with you when he was 17. He tried everything to gain your attention—joining the student council, participating in every extracurriculars, performing well in academics yet nothing worked. That was until high school. In college, having been forced into a band, he needed to find a new artist for their posters which he requested shoko to take care of. What he didn't expect was shoko to bring you as a volunteer—
warnings- college!au, satoru being heads over heels for you, he’s so damn in LOVE save my boy, friends to lovers, misunderstanding, SEMI PUBLIC SMUT, fingering, oral fem receiving, PUSSY DRUNK GOJO, dirty talk, creampie, BALL OF FLUFF, ANGST, mentions of smoking and alcoholism, super cute ending
w.c- 8.2k (have faith)
a/n's note- i'd poured out my heart in this (especially the smut). i hope you all do like this. your comments and reblogs are highly appreciated as it helps motivating me for writing long ass fics. taglist is open you can ask me to join. love ya' all!!
When satoru met you for the first time, he was 11 years old.
You were the daughter of his mother’s friend whom he heard of so many times. Though the accidental reunion in the mall while grocery shopping was the first time satoru ever had the opportunity to meet you face to face.
It was a totally random encounter, coincidental even, you can say when your mother recognised satoru’s mom and both squealed like teenagers. They'd a lot to catch up with, thus having their kids entertain each other in the play section was convincing enough for them to chit chat in a cafe.
And this is how satoru ended up being stuffed, hand in hand with you, to go enjoy in the play section as his mother patted his back, asking him to be good to you.
“Don't leave her hand, okay toru?! Make sure you both stay together.” His mom said before scooting herself with your mom.
Satoru looked at you, his hand locked in yours as you made eye contact with him before shying away, looking in the other direction. He stood confused before pulling you to the gaming section, without any word.
He scanned amongst the box of video games, before pulling out one which caught his eyes with his unoccupied hand. He gave a side look to you, reluctantly asking “you want to play this?”
You gaze down at the video game he held in his hands, eyes sparkling a bit, if satoru wasn't seeing things, then raise your head to look at him again. “It has vibrant colours.”
Satoru nodded, feeling a little giddy that you liked his preference. “It's called mario kart.”
“Oh.” Your eyes widened as he revealed the name.
“Do you know how to play it?” You shake your head at his question. “Then I can teach you!”
“Really?”
“Yeah, let's go and install it on the playstation.”
By the time satoru’s mother returns with your mum, they find satoru giggling along with you, hands still locked with each other, as he points to various stacked video games.
That day slowly came to an end and satoru didn't get to see you for the next two years till your giggles became a distant echo and your face a blur.
By the time he was 14, he almost forgot you.
Until that one day when he noticed you, sitting alone with your lunch staring at the sky at the campus of his high school.
You were biting on your chopsticks with dreamy eyes as recognition drew in satoru's mind.
Y/n— he thought. His brows frowned, thoughts slowly going in a muddle. How are you here? eating lunch in his high school campus unless— you're a student over here too! Satoru felt foolish, his lips slowly curving in a smile lifting one hand, abandoning the basketball in the other to greet you.
However, before he can get his words voiced out to you, gaining your attention, a brown haired girl comes up to you dragging you along with her in a hurry.
Satoru's hand froze in mid air, awkwardly stretching it above his head before bringing it down and turning towards his friends. He sprinted back to his group resuming the game, yet his mind stayed with you and your dreamy eyes.
He wanted to say ‘hi’ and watch your eyes grow wide before nodding your head just like you did back then. He wanted to show you the basketball he was holding and maybe teach you how to play ball just like he did back then.
“Oi satoru! Why are you missing the catch?!” one of his friends shouted, breaking him free of his daze. “sorry…taking a break!” He said, excusing himself, before going and plopping himself down on a nearby bench.
He recognised the brown haired girl—Yura. She often came to him asking for little favours. Did she know you? A friend? You studied in the same school and yet he only saw you today. Where were you all this time? Satoru was the same age as you. So you were bound to be in the same class, maybe different sections but he knew students from the other sections too. How come he didn't notice you yet?
The recess was over soon and he ran back to his class. Before entering the class, he noticed you again, hurrying to the class next to him.
Class 1-2.
Satoru felt silly as he read the classroom name in his mind.
As the final semester rolled on and a new semester started, satoru found out class 1-2 changed to class 2-2 and this year he was in the same section as yours.
He was excited to finally be able to talk to you without any awkwardness. After all, you were in the same classroom now— which means you will know him when he introduces himself on the first day of class. You will see him, introducing himself aloud and clear and recognition will draw on your face as you remember him.
That's what he initially thought the night before the first class. Until satoru felt the urge to perfect his speech and kept on practicing it, holding the crumpled sheet in his clammy hands, past midnight.
As a result he woke up late and by the time he hurried himself to school, the self introduction was half-over. He mumbled his apologies to his homeroom teacher, before hastily introducing himself and going to his assigned seat.
With that his perfect speech plan of gaining your attention bombed miserably. He raised his head in the direction of your seat—first row second desk, way far than his— fourth row last desk.
That's when he decided with the determination inclining in his heart to get your attention and make you remember that it's him.
The plan was simple. He just have to wait till recess and watch his chances closely. Once you're free and alone he will go make a move saying ‘hello’! Maybe even ask for your number.
Recess hour came by and his plan chose to bite the dust with girls and boys swarming around him to get his number and be friends with him. The group kept him occupied for the entirety of the recess and by the time he was done you were no where to be found in class.
Similar things happened the next day and the next day and the next day, never ceasing to leave him alone.
Satoru eventually came up with another plan��� excelling in academics. The more he's good in academics, the more are the chances for you to come up to him wanting his help to understand a problem. And the plan worked exceptionally well with girls frequenting him with a doubt in their lesson— except for you.
This time satoru came up with his active participation in extracurriculars and sports. The more he active he is the more is the chance of you joining the same activity or maybe seek his assistance for the upcoming sports day.
This plan too, was indeed prodigious and did attracted a lot of attention except yours.
His last option was of joining the student council. As the spirited member of the top student council, you might come up to him with a problem you're facing or anything you want to change.
So, without thinking much he did joined the student council, hoping to finally gain your attention. However the following week, concerns and requests for changes decreased promptly. The other council members sighed, few scrutinizing satoru. After all no one in the entire school would want their so very handsome, energetic and popular Satoru Gojo to have a heavy work load after school.
“Since we don't have any work to do now, thanks to gojo-kun, I'd gladly like you all to only maintain the regular class desk arrangement.” the student council president announced before leaving the council room.
Satoru sighed, this isn't what he thought. He just wanted your attention not the entire school’s. Everyone looked at him, when he walked, when he sat, when he ate, people always turned around to take a second look. Yet you never laid your eyes on him. Even being in the same class you never came up to him to chat.
Back slouched, with his tie undone, he slammed the door open of his classroom to pick up his bag.
You flinched.
Hand covering your mouth, a dust wiper on the other, you looked at him as he froze.
One entire year, was how satoru spent to gain your attention, to get you look at him, and when it finally happened the time seemed to halt. The sun rays pooled into the room with slow breezes messing up your bangs and satoru couldn't mutter a word but stare.
Conscious about him gaping, he tore his gaze away from you before shutting the door, this time gently.
The council president asked them to take care of class desk arrangements. However, the desks in his classroom have always been arranged, even before he joined the student council.
“you…um arrange the desks everyday?” He said fixing his tie, slowly walking up to his desk, wiped clean by you. “Yes.”
Satoru accompanies you cleaning and arranging for the rest of the time in complete silence. Soon you take your leave, and so does satoru but this was the time he was happy like really really happy.
He didn't exchange any words of recognition with you, from the day at the mall. He didn't talk. Yet he was beaming radiant, for just being with you, momentarily alone, in peace.
That day soon came to an end and another year passed by. Satoru did nothing but admire you from afar. This was the only way he felt the closest to you. He saw how you wiped and arranged the desks everyday; help people without even letting them notice; lend the only pencil you have without a word; and care for the garden whose garish flowers were disregarded by others.
The more he saw, the more he knew you. And the more he felt his heart slipping away.
You were kind, gentle and soft. You noticed people behind their masks. You regarded the smallest of the things with such care. And your delicate hands, often smeared with paint, held the responsibility of others without complaining.
He often saw yura asking favours from you, shoving her cleaning duties to you, sending you to get her lunch from the 7-eleven nearby and never once you said 'no'. You were so so precious.
He knew he’d to stop; the way you engrossed him, linger on his mind all day to the point that he was unable to think of anything but you was straight up creepy but his eyes never stopped searching for you.
Even in the midst of the crowds on a random road his eyes would unconsciously seek for you.
And by the time he was 17, satoru was hopelessly, absurdly and miserably in love with you.
Another year passed by and he could do nothing but stare. And the fact that you often looked at him too made things even worse.
He was so down bad for you that he couldn't keep on going like this anymore. He was so sure he'd confess to you on the day of graduating the high school, not caring about rejection.
Satoru stayed up an entire night, perfecting his confession. But by the time the graduation ceremony ended and he went to look out for you, you were nowhere to be found.
He asked yura about you, to which she replied that you went back home early and satoru had his heart broken at 18.
He couldn't move on easily but giving you up was the only option left. Unwillingly, satoru made his devastating decision of giving you up. He never thought he would see you again until a few years later in college, shoko brought you right in front of him.
“We need a new artist to cover up for this concert.” said geto suguru, stuffing his phone back in his pockets. “Why? What happened to ren?”
“Got himself into an accident and fractured his right arm.” Geto plops himself back down on the couch beside satoru, before pulling on the fretboard of his bass.
“Should visit him then.”
“Forget it.”
“Why?” frowned satoru, geto suguru—his best friend, the one he went to middle and high school with, was not the type to feign indifference. His behavior indeed had satoru confused.
“Nanami informed he got drunk at the last concert before getting himself into the accident. Drunk driving it is.”
“Did yaga find out about this?”
“Fortunately, he didn't. Nanami covered the case before him finding out,” geto brought his hand, swiping back his string of bangs, “if it reaches yaga, he will ban us from using the campus stadium.”
“lucky I'd say…so what now?” The next concert is in 3 days and the band poster is still incomplete.
Shortly after satoru joined his college, suguru started a band along with two other guys. The band was doing well but due to a disagreement they decided to split up. Suguru then suggested satoru join the band and the following year they gained another member named nanami kento.
They used to hold performances at random pubs but as its popularity increased, the college decided to give them the campus stadium to hold their concerts. Something they did extra was hiring an artist to do their band poster— hand-drawn. It'd become a little tradition— a lucky charm says suguru, and now that their artist had broken his hand right at the eleventh hour before the concert they will have to—
“Find a new one.”
“nana—” geto shuts him before he could finish his sentence. “Nanami is trying his best, so am I. So, you try finding one too.”
“How am I supposed to?”
“Well I'm sure if you go with a face like this to the art department, people would volunteer in a line.”
“Same goes with you, why don't you go and ask. I'm sure if you could wear your shirt a little loose you can surely get your clingy ex find a good one." Gojo says in a mocking tone, grabbing his guitar and looping it around his back before leaving the club.
He was sure annoyed, but he will have to find one, geto wasn't in a mood to joke earlier either. Rather than going by himself, he decided to ask shoko get it done for him; he was sure she'd agree for a few packs of cigarettes.
Walking on his way to the parking lot he texted shoko to meet at their regular cafe.
“Sup!”
Satoru smiled knowing shoko could never fail him, even if she didn't agree right away a little guilt trip will do.
“All good?”
“Yeah, what do you need?”
“Just a little favour.”
“And what that might be?”
“Get an appropriate artist from the art department. Ren broke his arm and suguru's so down about going himself, ya’ know about his ex,” shoko started grabbing her cup of iced coffee to retreat when gojo slammed two packets of cigarettes on the table. “I've two more packs to offer.”
Shoko returns to her seat, a big smile on her face. “Okay! Since I'm your empathetic, gracious and compassionate friend, I will try and see what I can get done.”
“Yes please…”
“I'm not doing it for cigarettes ya’ know.”
“Mhmmm” satoru nods his face dramatically.
“Get the other two packets out.”
“Sure.”
Satoru knew four packets would get the job done as he parted away from shoko, driving his way back home.
And the next day when shoko texted him that she got a volunteer and is bringing her to the club, he didn't expected it to be you.
Shoko looped a hand around your shoulders “so this is the club,” chewing a gum, “and this is satoru gojo.”
“Hi…” you said looking at him, before taking a look at those instruments laying behind.
It’s you. It's really you. He couldn't believe his eyes yet stood unblinking as if you were some mirage and will fade away once he closes his eyelids.
“Gojo?” Shoko waved a hand infront of his face and realizing he didn't respond to you, he bent his torso bowing to you.
“Woah,” shoko’s face scrunched up, cringing at his behavior, “when did you start being all formal?”
You giggled at her comment while satoru hushed her with a series of ‘shut ups’.
“I'm—”
“Y/n.” satoru whispered almost as if reminding himself the way your name sounded in his lips. “Y/n, i know.”
You chuckle at his words, tugging a strand of hair behind your ear.
“You know her?” shoko tilted her head at him, not expecting you to be acquainted with him.
“We went to the same high school.” You say when satoru does nothing but gape at you with dreamy eyes.
His heart did a whole somersault at your sentence. You remembered him; you remembered his name; you remembered he was in the same high school as you. The fact that you regarded him made him so giddy that he was practically ready to throw his hands up in the air or kiss the floor on which you walk.
“Kay’ I'll leave you guys to talk then.” She smirked before raising a cocky eyebrow at satoru, excusing herself from the club.
“So…you're the only one?”
“Huh?”
“In the band— i mean…”
“Oh no” he dragged, “there are two more members along with the back musicians…”
You humm, taking a proper look at the club.
“You like it?”
“It has vibrant colours.”
Your words echoed in his ears, the same which you said to him at the mall. Oh how bad had he wanted to hear those.
“The jazzies,” you read the name of their band aloud, “why jazzies? You only play jazz?”
“No…we play all sorts of music…it's just a name suguru chose for the band.”
“you do originals?”
“Both originals and covers. Anything suguru comes up with.”
Your mouth forms a little ‘o’ as satoru explains to you.
“geto seems to be doing all the stuff, what do you do?”
“You know him?” satoru’s brows furrowed. “Whom?” you ask.
“geto…geto suguru.”
“Ofc, he was in the same class as us.”
“Oh.”
Ofcourse. Both he and geto were in the same class as you. It was no big deal for you to remember both of them. However, accepting that he wasn't any special was bitter.
Satoru’s eyes followed your figure as you went out to reach for his guitar, mindlessly drawing your finger on its printed patterns.
“You didn't answer my question…”
“I guess I found you for our band.”
When none of you says anything, satoru breaks the ice, clearing his throat.
“You know how to play?”
“Err…no.”
“I can teach you.”
He slided his index among the few string instruments before pulling out an acoustic one, bringing it to you.
“Hold the fretboard with your left hand,” satoru pulled the strap over your shoulders, “and bring your right hand over the body, fingers near the sound hole— yep that's right,” he turned your back to him, gently holding the back of your palms.
“Now, pluck the chords for me,” his chest was against your back as he guided you through the strings.
“Like this?” you ask him.
“Yes, you're doing very well.”
The guitar in your hands, played smoothly as satoru guided you through it.
Just like when he taught you how to play mario kart.
Satoru looks down at you smiling in excitement. Oh how cute you looked like that. He could admire you twenty-four seven, never wanting to tear his gaze away, for you're that ineffably eesome in his eyes.
Time almost ceased when you looked up at him, eyes crinkling with a smile that soon died as red creeps up your cheeks.
Satoru’s face was mere inches away from you, his eyes wavering down to your lips.
“SATO—RU— oh,” geto bursted in along with nanami causing you both to flinch.
He quickly leaves your hand.
“Y/n??” Geto dragged out your name, looking at you with his eyebrows knitting and lips forming a silly smile.
“Hi,” you pull the strap over your shoulders abandoning the instrument on the nearby couch. “I'm here to volunteer.”
“You do?”
“Yeah…”
“That's great! I can't believe satoru even managed to talk—” satoru smacked him mid sentence.
Nanami, for some reason, found the ceilings very interesting today, totally ignoring his two seniors.
Geto explained to you about their little tradition of hand drawn posters and showed you the posters they used for the last concerts. You, then, asked them to send them a group picture of the three and their preferences for colours and themes.
“For that I might need your number—”
“I- i can send it to her…” Geto passed a suggestive smile at satoru, which he ignored and awkwardly forwarded his phone to you.
“Yeah that sounds fine. Here's my number, save it and text me later.”
“Kky!”
You pull the sling of your tote bag up to your arm, giving them a little nod, before turning your back to leave.
“Wait!—” satoru held your arms frantically pulling you back. He hurried to the back near the couch you plopped the guitar and shoved it to you. “T-take it.”
“Ah— no I can't do that.”
“Take it. You can learn how to play and I- I can teach you.” he tried not to stutter yet failed miserably.
“No i rea—”
“consider it as a gift— from me.”
You frowned a bit but agreed anyway.
“That's really sweet of you satoru! I will wait for your text! Bye!!”
He waved back to you.
“What was that?” Geto implies in the direction of the exit door through which you just left.
“nothing.”
Later, You sent the photo of the finished banner to satoru. It took you 42 hours to finish it.
Satoru on the other hand was practicing really hard, totally different from his half hearted performances from the previous ones which wasn't unnoticed by the other members.
He has to be the best. After all, this concert will be different from the previous ones. This time you will be there to see him, cheer for him, and notice him.
You soon bring the banner rolled up to the club. “Woah! You really did a great job.”
“This is much better than ren’s.” says nanami before going back to his drum set, giving you a thumbs up.
“Satoru?”
“Y-yes.”
“You liked it?”
“I loved it. It has vibrant colours.” You giggled at his answer, shifting your direction to his gaze. His fingers seemed to flake off any dust on the surface of your work, handling it so gently.
It wasn't his fault he felt so overwhelmed. All these years he'd yearned for one kind word from your lips yet he was left starving.
And now you'd drawn him with such precision, that it was as if you were accustomed to drawing him for the hundredth time.
His heart fluttered at the thought.
“I will be there at your concert,” you say, turning your back to him. “All the best!”
The campus stadium was full with a bunch of students and hippies, it was really hard for satoru to try locating you amongst the sea of crowds.
The music rang loud, brisking fiery cheers from the crowd, full of vim and vigor. The spotlight shone on the three— geto with his vocals and string of bass; satoru with his acoustic guitar; and nanami with his drum set.
The crowd roared in excitement as music coursed through their veins.
Will you be cheering too?
Satoru raised his head from the guitar, plucking chords effortlessly, to his audience.
And as if it was fate that drew both of you together, his eyes found yours. You were there in the vip section, along with shoko and another girl. You were moving with beats, swaying your arms in rhythm to their music.
His eyes locked in yours as you waved a hand at him. Oh how, how pretty you looked. Everything except you was a blur to him.
The crowd goes even more wild, seeing satoru blush, not sensing it was you who caused it.
The concert continued till past midnight as the vibrations thrumming around the air slowed and wrapped up with their ending song: “Where Our Blue Is.”
As the applause slowly start to dissipate, satoru pulled off his instrument, running to the edge of the stage, and hopped down the raised platform.
The college girls shrieked baffled, some even reached out, grabbing on his wrists and clothes. He politely got out of their grip making his way to the vip section, geto and nanami following him.
The still air felt electric as he approached you.
“you liked the show?”
“Ofc it was amazing!!” The girl beside you answers in your stead, whom he now recognised as yura.
“It was really good.” you say swallowing a laugh bubbling up your throat at his huffed out appearance.
“Thanks to your banner, it even attracted more audience.” geto remarked, placing his arm around satoru’s shoulders.
“Thank you.”
“You should thank me for bringing her in.” Shoko reclaims, looping her hand around your arm, “let's go steal some shots.”
“Oh no i can't— i don't drink. And I need to hurry back home it's late.”
“Kyaahh— you've let me down y/nniee. Only two packets of cigarettes can get my mood uplifte—”
“I will bring it tomorrow.” You say shutting up her whines.
“kk bye and text me when you get home the rest are joining me right ?”
“Count me out. I'll be driving her home tonight.” Satoru says sheepishly, ignoring the smirks and exchanged looks of his bandmates, a slight blush creeping up his cheeks.
“No but I was about to go home with her —” yura interrupts.
“Satoru’s fine. You're coming with us.” Shoko dragged her along with geto and nanami, which satoru was glad of.
Finally he'd be alone with you.
He guided you to the parking lot from the back of the stage, before getting his car keys out.
It's metallic jingle echoing softly as he presses the button on his key fob. The car responds with a soft beep unlocking as satoru opens the passenger door, holding it open for you.
“Here,” he gestures with his other hand, “get in.”
“Sure.” You say gulping thickly.
The thick smell of your cologne mingling with the leather scent of the car.
He closes the door before sprinting to the other side, getting himself in. “Don't— ” he stops you when you reach out for your seat belt. “Allow me the honor” his finger brushes against your skin as he reaches out for the seat belt.
Your heart practically jolts at his action.
The click of the seat belt buckle echoes softly in the quiet car, as he straightens back to his former position.
“Where do you live?” He clears his throat, starting the car engine and flicking on the headlights before pulling out the car into the driveway.
“In the downtown.”
“That's quite far from the campus, how bout I drive you everyday back home?” His eyes suggestive, making you chuckle.
“I can't let you do that.”
“Why?”
“Since it's far from the campus and you won't be visiting often.”
“Who knows, I might be visiting your place often.”
You turn your face from the window to look at him.
“What?”
“I will have to— to teach you guitar.”
You crack up at his silliness, finding yourself melting again.
“Okay fine. But that still doesn't counts.”
“Why not!”
Since that day, satoru did visited you often, sometimes barging in with shoko and sometimes alone teaching you how to play guitar, plucking on chords and notes.
And you attended all of his concerts. Their previous artist has recovered now and has resumed his work, so you no longer work with them. However they insist you tag along each time and it's not like you complain.
You liked satoru’s company. He was handsome, charismatic and popular. You'd watched him your entire high school. He was the one of most popular students, good in a millions of things, starting from academics to being athletic. He'd win every sports competition and even participate in all the extracurriculars. You'd admired him for he could do the things which you didn't had the courage for.
You liked how he didn't judge people, helped them in their need, and even took care of those garish flowers nobody seemed to double take.
You'd previously met him before high school, though he never brought that up. You wondered if he even remembers the day at the mall. You wanted to ask him so bad, however—
Your world was only limited to papers and paints.
So you painted.
You painted him so many times that you'd have more than five sketchbooks with paintings full of him.
You wanted to be friends, maybe even more than friends.
But that didn't matter now. He was near you and you would do anything to keep your thumping heart in control and not have satoru cut you out of his life.
But how can you?
How can you control it when satoru so gently, so lovingly, takes your hand in his. When he smiles so sweetly at you. When he teaches you how to pull chords and other instruments. When he drops you home from college almost everyday. When he hugs you and tells you to take care.
How are you supposed to be just friends when he's so overly affectionate to you?
Or maybe it's just your overthinking.
Satoru was always polite and sweet, he'd always been sweet to others and you were no special.
“What are you thinking baby?”
You come out of your daze, rolling your eyes at the nickname.
“How many times do I have to tell you not to call me that…”
“Not my fault you aren't paying attention to me…” he pulls you closer to him, resting his face on your shoulder.
“Have you always been this hungry for attention?” you ask, getting yourself comfortable abandoning the guitar beside you on the couch— of the club.
“I've been starving.”
You cringe at his words. Satoru has another concert today and they just finished practicing an hour ago and now they are taking a break.
Geto and nanami and other back artists wanted to get some fresh air so they left you and satoru alone to entertain each other.
“Are you really skipping on me?” He looked at you with puppy eyes.
“I've a gallery exhibition tomorrow.” You need to scoot back home to get ready for it. It's a big event for you to showcase your arts.
Satoru hummed, nuzzling his face on the crook of your neck, “I'll be there. You're going to do great.”
An uncertain lump forms in your throat, hard to swallow, you say nothing. Your heart was in a conflict again, no matter what you can absolutely not—
“I will be going then. All the best for your concert.”
You push satoru away, reaching for your tote bag from the side of a random arm chair. “Wait I will drop—”
“Who's leaving?” shoko barges in with yura and others.
Satoru points at you.
“I just got here. You can't leave already.”
“Yup! Yup! Please stay a little longer, baby. I'll drop you back home, no worries.”
Shoko exchanges suggestive glances with geto and they somehow persuade you to stay a little longer.
They start practicing for another round when shoko pulls your head closer, “what do you think about gojo?”
“Huh?!” You shout over the music, unable to hear her.
She grabbed your hand and pulled you outside, with Yura following closely behind you both.
“What— “
“What do you think of gojo?”
A burning sensation hits you slowly as shoko’s question registers in your mind.
You ears turn red.
“Eh…um h-he’s a nice guy. A nice musician…and—”
“And?” Shoko wiggled her brows at you, a sly smile on her face.
“A-a nice friend.”
“Just a friend?” You nod at her, seemingly more embarrassed at her implications.
Shoko's face literally radiated disappointment. It was as if someone told her that cigarettes are now banned in the country. “I think he's interested in you,” you choked on air at her remark. “No?”
Yura shrugged.
The music slowed down and then paused, bringing your conversation to a momentary halt.
Satoru rushed outside, complaining about why you left in the middle of his practice.
“Bruh, chill, I'm not trying to steal her away from you. We're just talking!” Shoko jokes as you laugh all flustered.
Just when you were about to leave one of his fangirls suddenly appeared from nowhere and threw herself into his arms, wrapping hers tightly around his neck. He stumbled back a step, surprised, before regaining his balance but he didn't put her down rather he spinned her around before setting her back down, with a polite smile on his face.
The other members just saw the scene unfold with amusement. Nanami was surprised at the fan’s boldness and geto simply observed the scene as shoko rolled her eyes, finding it hysterical.
“What do you think of shoko’s remark?” said yura, looping her hand around your arm.
“What?” You say suppressing the slow tinge of jealousy.
“About gojo being interested in you…”
“I-i don't think so.”
You try to laugh it off.
“Yeah, he's just polite. To pretty much everyone.”
Her words felt like a splinter to your heart. You shouldn't feel like this. It'd happened before— not now again.
Yura’s right, satoru is just polite and will do the same for everyone what he does for you— because he's kind. And you're no special.
The entire ride was silent. Satoru kept asking you if anything was wrong but you just guised a smile at him, insisting it was nothing.
The next day at the gallery event, you behaved oddly. You smiled at him but didn't reach your eyes, your answers to his question were of one word, even avoiding his touch.
“Did I do something wrong?” he asked warily.
“No.”
Days passed by and you distanced yourself more from him.
Satoru, on the other hand, was almost losing his mind. His world turned upside down. You stopped coming to his concerts, ignored his texts and even refused to let him drop you back home.
It was yesterday you’d allowed him to teach you the guitar yet today you behaved as if you'd long forgotten him. You were cold and distant, leaving him puzzled by his own thoughts upon your sudden change in demeanor.
He couldn't help but wonder whether he'd done something that made you this upset?
You'd said it was nothing.
Then why?
What the fuck did he messed up?
Satoru missed you terribly and violently.
He eyed you from the inside of his car parked a bit far from your department. Today was another day you refused his offer to drive you to class. ‘I'm kinda sick so I won't be going.’ This was what you'd texted him the morning and yet there you were getting off your uber.
You lied to him.
“Come with me to their concert today.” Shoko urged you, her lips pursed in a thin line.
“I'm sorry—”
“No you're not so sorry. Tomorrow’s Saturday, come with me, gojo’s getting mad without you.”
You suck in a breath at the mention of his name.
“What's wrong?” shoko says sipping the last of her drink before plopping it on your tea table.
“Nothing.”
“Then come.”
You agreed eventually. Attending the concert won't be a big deal.
And it wasn't, except for satoru’s piercing gaze burning holes in your back. You accompanied Shoko backstage and casually greeted everyone— including him.
“God, haven't seen you in so long.” geto side hugged you as nanami gave you a nod of acknowledgement before running off to the stage for some last minute preparations. “Satoru missed you like crazy.”
You attempt a weak smile in satoru's direction, darting a hesitant glance his way. His gaze was fixed on you, but his expression was unreadable, almost giving shivers down your spine.
One of the other members suddenly hurried over to Geto, urgently speaking about some issue, he politely excused himself and exited the room, closely followed by Shoko. Now, you were left alone with Satoru, the only two remaining in the room.
“I should go and check what's the proble—” you try sprinting your way out the door, “wait—” when satoru stops you.
His hand on your arm, preventing you to go any further and when you struggle to get out of his grip, he tightens his grip even more slamming you to the wall, pinning you caging your body.
“What's wrong with you?”
“Gojo you're hurting m—”
“Gojo?” His voice cracked, grip losing before letting your arms go, “why? Why must you do this to me?”
“Do what?” You drift your gaze away unable to look at satoru, who's this close tearing up.
“This— why must you do this? Why must you ignore me? Why must you be distant from me? Why must you lie to me so that I won't bother picking you up or dropping you home? Why must you reject my affection?” He sucks in a breath “You know I can't live like that—”
“why?”
“Don't pretend like you don't know…”
“no no don't say it,” you throw your hands up in the air frantically, “don't— I can’t fall again…no— I know you're just being polite and you will do this for anyone, but I can’t help it if I don't—”
“I love you—” he whispers, bringing your hand up, placing the palm flat to his chest.
“No you don't.”
“Yes I do— what do you mean you can't fall again,” he suppresses your struggles of wrenching free your hand from his grip. “You have no idea how crazy I'm for you. I love you and I've loved you since I was 17. I was about to confess to you on our graduation day but you just disappeared leaving me alone. And now that I have you I'm not letting you go— make no mistake baby, if there's anyone I’d ever kneel for— it'd be you.”
Thick silence covered the entire room, except your heavy exhales. Satoru gojo was inches close to you, your hand still laid flat against his heaving chest.
“B-but I wrote you a note confes—”
“What note? I never….” confusion twisted on his face bitterly.
“You threw it in the dustbin— the one I wrote to you the day before graduation.”
His face told the truth, as he shook his head denying it. He never received any note from you— nevertheless having the audacity to throw it in the trash when he'd been hopelessly in love with you all these years.
“Yura told me—” you shut your mouth as the realization hits you. The person whom you considered as a friend backstabbed you long ago.
She lied about him discarding it while it was actually her who had stolen it off his desk before satoru even noticed.
Your head raised in embarrassment, ready to apologize for the misunderstanding when suddenly, Satoru's lips met yours in a tender kiss. The kiss was filled with such affection and tenderness that you felt as if you might melt in his embrace. His arms held you close, firmly yet gently, as he deepened the kiss. Your heart pounded in your chest as you responded to his kiss. All thoughts of the misunderstanding were forgotten in that moment of pure intimacy before satoru pulled away with frowned brows and a dazed smile.
“Tell me, would I kiss anyone the same way I kiss you?” he pulled you again, smacking his lips on yours as he snaked a hand around your waist, the other, still firm, holding your palm.
You could feel his heartbeat going rapid the more he deepens the kiss, sucking on your upper lip.
He pulls away again.
“Tell me, would my heart beat the same way as it beats around yours?” He smacks his lips again, this time pinching your waist making you gasp as he slips his tongue in.
His hand fumbles with the hem of your dress, pulling away again, a string of drool connecting both of your lips. “Would I be breathless the same way as I'm now?”
His hand travels up your inner thigh, till it reaches the wet blotch of drenched silk. You grasp his shoulders, when he starts drawing circles over the fabric, smirking before nuzzling his face on the crook of your neck.
“Satoru, what if someone walks in—” your body jolts, nails digging into his back as he pulls the fabric to the side, plunging a digit in without any warning. “Let them…” he goes back to sucking your skin while rubbing his thumb over your swollen clit.
Your teeth sank on your bottom lips, his finger slowly plunging in and out of you. “Nngh ‘toru, you’re—” small trembles quivered through your body as he plunged with a faster rhythm.
“Shh baby! Let me take you” he inserts another digit as your teeth dug even deeper into your lip, stretching you and filling you so well.
He was stroking you, curling his fingers inside until hitting your most sensitive spot. Sweat beaded your forehead as your trembles gave way to full body shudders, shutting your mouth with your hand not wanting to be loud.
Satoru drew himself back from your neck, satisfied marking and suckling, withdrawing his digits, slick from you as you wince at the loss of his fullness.
He brings them up and sucks your essence off his fingers with a pop. “I want to eat you out.”
Before even you can make out his words he kneels down bunching up the fabric to your hips pulling your panty down properly and latching onto your swollen clit.
“Fuck ‘toru.” he lapped his tongue on your clit, drawing circles, tasting your sweet before drawing himself back, “I am fucking you baby.” He says, licking a fat stripe on your vulva, his rigid tongue swiping back and forth over your clit sending sensations that make your body jolt. “Here and raw” he hummed against your pussy, his breath warm and hot sending vibrations to your core, before vacuuming on your clit.
Your hand grasping his hair, as he worked on your orgasm.
He plunged his digits again, rhythmatic with the little pants escaping your mouth, along with the slick sounds of your hips buckling down his fingers.
He smirked internally at your enthusiasm.
“So fucking nasty for me huh?” He said against your pussy, licking and sucking till you were nothing but withering in mindless pleasure. You were taking it well, suppressing your moans into breathless pants until he sucked, fingers pressing the most sensitive spot inside you.
A shriek fell past your lips, knees buckling, followed by a string of moans and whimpers. “Oh— fuck..” you try closing your thighs which he prevents with his iron grip of one hand, forcing it open till he has better access. “Don't even dare closing on me…”
The wet sounds of his fingers, plunging in and out of your gummy walls, echoed throughout the empty room.
Something coiled hot and fuzzy in the lower pit of your stomach. You clenched hard around his finger, when the bass-heavy beats of the band's concert began, causing you to involuntarily shove satoru’s face deeper into your cunt as you heard voices from the stage outside.
Geto's unmistakable voice rang out, accompanied by the heavy drumming of nanami. They had started performing without satoru.
“Nn’toru they start—” your voice died down into a breathless gasp as you felt your pelvic muscles clench, tension looping around your entire body as fiery sensations erupted. You arch your back against the wall, unable to stop your toes curling at the intensity of his tongue lapping, finger fuckin' you, as your vision gets blurry.
“Yeah…cum for me baby” his velvety murmurs were all it took for you to turn into a mess of sensations, your body erupting as your high came down bursting, dripping and spilling down your thighs, his chin and his neck.
Satoru lapped up the drops carelessly strewn about your skin, his tongue tracing a path along the droplets splattered on your inner thighs as he savored everything with anticipation.
“Tell me, would I kneel infront of anyone and let them cum this hard on my fingers?” He straightened himself up, “and then drink it up like a pussy drunk male whore?” his gaze never left yours, wiping the leftover slick from his chin with the back of his hand before licking it clean.
The music from outside has now gained its intensity, thrumming even louder.
No— you mouthed.
Satoru’s gaze was still fixed at you, when he unzipped his pants, his aching cock sprang out red, already leaking precum.
You gape at his girth.
It was big.
And fucking thick.
Leaning in, Satoru brings his lips close to your ear, his voice clear over the blaring music from outside, “Like what you see—”
You didn't get to answer him before he slammed right in.
A cry of pleasure tore from your throat, as you loop your hands around his neck, nails digging on his back.
He hissed out a breath, restraining himself from moving till you adjusted to his size.
Only then did he slowly pull it out leaving only the tip inside. You grimace at the loss of fullness until he slams back in causing you to clench around him.
He let out a low guttural moan which was almost inaudible to you over the roar of music if you weren't so close to each other, feeling the raw desire of his voice vibrating on your skin.
“Tell me— hahh- would I let anyone clench this hard on me if this weren't you?”
You were at a loss for words.
The kind, polite, sweet satoru you knew was gone. In his place was someone who fucked hard.
When you don't answer he pulls out and slams right back in harsh, eyes gleaming with wicked intent.
Satisfied, satoru guides his one hand to tapping on your thigh suggesting you wrap your legs up around him.
He repositions his dick on your entrance, before supporting your weight with one hand, pinning your body completely to the wall, while the other hand grabs your neck, choking you before giving you a sloppy breathless kiss.
“You like it don't ya’ hmm fuck— so tight—”
Your cries came out choked as he pounded into you, in an insane manner, desperate and primal.
“Tell me—”
Thrust
“do you—”
Thrust
“still think I'm just being polite?”
Thrust.
The roar of geto's voice singing out aloud different notes masked out the filth of your moans.
The sensation was in again, hot and uproar, coiling beneath the core of your consciousness. Satoru sensed you being close to your climax, continued to plow into your pussy, now supporting your weight with both hands against the wall.
Your toes curled again, nails digging down his back almost scratching the fabric, “yes that's it love,” your eyes rolled back as you arch your neck unable to handle the pleasure, “cum for me…”
Your mouth forming a little ‘o’, mind blank as your eyes saw stars. The only consciousness left in your body directed you to the burning of your heat, till it came crashing down.
You came hard letting your head fall on his shoulders too spent for anything.
Satoru too chased his high, thrusting into your swollen pussy, his cock twitching inside you, till you felt him getting sloppy and tense before cumming into you.
The music was still very loud, beats thrumming your flushed veins.
None of you said anything, remaining in the same position. Satoru pulled himself out, his cum dripping out your vagina, before walking over and placing you on a nearby chair.
He cleaned you up gently tugging your clothes back and fixes himself before cleaning the mess near the wall.
“They— they started performing without you…” you huff out, drained still in the very euphoria of your pleasure satoru showed you.
“I told them to do so…” he shouted over the noise.
You remain stunned for a while, letting out a breath. “I'm sorry…I avoided you.”
“Here I thought you were giving me a thousand kisses as an apology.”
You chuckle at him, back to his normal self— your sweet, kind and maybe not so polite satoru…
He came over to you, lifting you effortlessly before plopping himself down on the chair with you on his lap.
“I missed you.”
“I missed you too.”
“No but I missed you like crazy…” he pouted. “y/n be my girlfriend…please.”
Tears start forming in your eyes, overwhelmed, you never thought the satoru gojo you met at the mall, the satoru gojo you loved your entire high school would someday ask you to be his girlfriend.
To paint his heart with your love.
“I will.”
“no wait— marry me instead!”
You dug your face deeper into his chest, laughing at his playfulness. And satoru just smiled.
Finally he would be yours.
you and Satoru started dating since then and things couldn't have been any better for him. He practically announced to the world that you were his girlfriend, always picking you up and dropping you off from campus, and claiming a kiss as his reward. You’d also cut Yura off, not wanting any more negativity in your life. Satoru was yours, and you were his. And He couldn't be any happier.
Tags: @cccandynecklaces @secretfankoala
© strawberrymochin 24 | plagiarism won't be tolerated |
#jjk#jjk x reader#jjk smut#gojo satoru#jjk fluff#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru x reader#satoru x reader#jujutsu kaisen x satoru gojo#satoru gojo x reader#jjk x you#jjk gojo#gojo x you#gojo x reader#jujutsu gojo#gojo smut#jujustu kaisen#gojo saturo#satoru#satoru gojo#satoru gojo fanart#gojou satoru x reader#gojo satoru smut#geto suguru#geto x reader#kento nanami#nanami x reader#shoko ieiri#satoru smut#satoru x you
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nightmares | s.j
in which you have a nightmare and seek comfort from your roommate.
pairing: jake x fem!reader
includes: nipple play, pussy eating, sleepy sex, unprotected sex (lmk if i missed anything).
it was childish, you knew: to be so afraid of a dumb nightmare that you had to go to your roommate for comfort.
but there you were, absolutely petrified. you laid flat on your back in your bed, not moving a muscle because you were so afraid. it didn’t help that it was storming outside either, the occasional cracks of thunder and lightning making you shiver.
when you checked the time on your phone, it read 2:19 a.m.
you briefly wondered if your roommate, jake, would be awake. it was dumb to even consider it because you knew he cherished his sleep, so he would definitely be passed out with it being that late.
even though you knew that, you still needed to be around another person. you were way too afraid to be by yourself right then.
you took a deep breath and pulled yourself out of bed. you leapt through your dark room and opened the door into the hallway. jake’s room was just across from yours.
his door was closed. you pressed your ear against it but couldn’t hear a thing. you were slightly frustrated that he was asleep, but it wasn’t like it was his job to stay awake for you just in case you had a nightmare.
slowly, you twisted open the door. his room was completely dark, but a flash of lightning illuminated his sleeping form for just a second. as you suspected, he was completely knocked out, buried under the covers in his bed.
you took a hesitant step inside, not entirely sure what you were doing by going into his room. you just needed company and the reassurance that your nightmare wasn’t real.
the door came to a close behind you, the sound of it shutting a little louder than you would’ve liked.
jake stirred, sitting up ever so slightly.
“y/n?” he mumbled, eyes squinted to look at you in the darkness.
“sorry i woke you,” you apologized, awkwardly standing by the end of his bed.
“what are you doing?” he asked. “what’s wrong?”
“i just…i had a nightmare,” you told him.
saying it out loud, you were embarrassed. you’d woken your roommate up like a child. you were selfish too for doing that. he worked hard and he was tired, thus he needed a full night of sleep.
“nightmare?” jake questioned.
“yeah,” you said. “i know, it’s dumb. i was just scared.”
“c’mere.”
your body filled with warmth and relief at the soft word from jake. he wasn’t mad, he was actually inviting you into his bed to provide you with the comfort you so desperately needed.
you crawled into his bed and slid under the covers with him. his bed was so warm and you immediately felt about a million times safer just being near him.
you laid on your side and he slid his arm around your waist, pressing his front side to your back.
you’d been roommates with jake for about a year, but you’d never once cuddled. you were friends—good friends, but you barely ever even touched. you never really hugged each other, never held hands, and especially never spooned in his bed before.
“d’you wanna talk about it?” he asked, his breath warm against your ear.
“no,” you said, not wanting to have to relive the awful nightmare. “i just couldn’t be alone.”
jake inhaled and all he could smell was the intoxicating scent of your shampoo. you were so warm and delicate in his embrace, he was definitely freaking out but trying his best not to show it.
“i’m here now,” he said. “nothing is gonna get you if i’m here.”
his words, for whatever reason, made your heart pound, made butterflies flutter in your tummy. to hear those sentences come from your incredibly attractive roommate made you…excited.
sunghoon was the reason you two knew each other. you were friends with sunghoon, jake was friends with sunghoon, and you all started hanging out in groups. you and jake coincidentally needed roommates at the same time, and then there you were.
you’d always thought he was hot and not only his physical appearance, but his personality too. he was sweet and caring and gentle, and you just really, really enjoyed him. his cute accent was a plus too.
“thank you,” you exhaled. “i knew you were sleeping and i really didn’t wanna wake you. i just—”
“hey, it’s okay,” he assured.
you suddenly felt the soft tingling sensation of his fingers grazing up and down your t-shirt clad back. you sighed in pleasure, letting your eyes flutter shut.
“feels so good,” you told him, your voice in a mumbled daze.
“yeah?” he replied. “want me to keep going?”
“mmm, yes please,” you hummed tiredly.
jake cooed at your sleepy state and continued running the tips of his fingertips up and down the length of your back.
he continued to do that until you were slowly lulled into a soft doze.
after a few minutes, jake spoke.
“can i lift your shirt?” he asked.
your eyes flew open, startled by his sudden voice in what was such a quiet room.
“yeah,” you told him.
he slowly pushed your t-shirt up your body, revealing your smooth back. he left your shirt bunched up around your chest and reattached his fingers to your back, using his nails to glide up and down.
you leaned back into his touch, sighing in pleasure. jake’s breathing got ever so slightly heavier by the sight of your pleasured reactions and your pliant body against his.
he eventually switched to using the palm of his hand to rub your back soothingly. he rubbed along your back before his hand started inching to your side, and he rubbed there too.
he gently pulled you down so you were laying on your back. with him still laying on his side, he had a height advantage over you. he looked down at your tired face, licking his lips.
neither of you even said anything and mutually started leaning in at the same time. the moment was already intimate from him rubbing your back, it just felt right and normal to kiss.
his warm lips were heavy against yours, kissing you slowly and deeply. his hand came up to cradle your face, caressing your warm blushing cheek with his thumb.
“you’re so pretty,” he mumbled against your lips.
if you were any more awake, you probably would’ve been squealing and jumping up and down.
he trailed his hand down from your face and to the side of your waist. your shirt was still raised slightly, revealing a sliver of your stomach.
jake pushed your shirt up and stopped just below your breasts.
“can i keep going?” he asked, pulling back and looking into your eyes.
you were so excited about where things were going, you would’ve been an idiot to say no.
“yeah,” you answered, grabbing the back of his neck and pulling him back down to your lips.
he smiled against your lips and inched his tongue inside your mouth. you responded immediately, rubbing the slippery tip of your tongue against his. the sound was purely lewd, all wet and kissing noises.
he pushed your shirt up until it was over your chest, revealing your tits to him for the first time. the cool air in the room immediately hardened your nipples.
jake cupped your breast in his hand and swiped his thumb over your nipple, making you gasp and arch into his touch. he pulled away from your lips for a second to wet the tip of his pointer finger. he then brought his finger down to your nipple and rubbed it in little circles.
you moaned against his lips, jutting your hips up because you were suddenly a lot more needy that you’d realized. with the way he was playing with your nipple, it was starting to get you worked up.
he departed from your lips, trailing kisses down your chin, your neck, your collarbones, and finally to your chest.
he circled his tongue around the bud before taking your nipple into his mouth and sucking on it gently. you moaned out, entangling your fingers in his thick hair.
he played with the other neglected nipple, massaging it between his thumb and index finger. you spread your legs and tugged on his hair softly, showing to him how good it felt.
“you like that, baby?” he asked, licking your nipple in circles again. “is it makin’ you feel better?”
“fuck,” you moaned. “yeah, i love it.”
“cute,” he chuckled, switching to suck on the other nipple.
you weren’t sure how long that went on for. you just knew it was long enough for your panties to be completely soaked by the time he pulled away.
he kissed down your bare stomach and stopped where the waistband of your sweatpants were.
“can i keep making you feel good, baby?” he asked, his hand coming to wrap around your thigh.
you needed him to make you feel good. your pussy was so sensitive from being so aroused and you just needed something.
“mmm, please,” you answered. “it’s sticky.”
“it’s sticky?” he repeated, peeling your sweatpants down your legs. “let me see.”
he spread your legs and found that your flimsy pair of panties were completely soaked through from your arousal. he gulped, bringing his finger up and dragging it down your clothed slit.
you whimpered, jutting your hips up to try and get more contact out of just his one finger. he pushed your hips down.
“poor thing,” he cooed. “you’re soaked. did you like getting your nipples sucked that much?”
“yeah,” you answered pathetically, embarrassed.
“sweet girl,” he said, pouting at you. “gonna take care of you, angel.”
your pussy clenched around nothing.
he was quick to hook his fingers into your panties and slide them down your legs, tossing them onto the floor with your sweatpants. you were bare in front of him then, your cunt dripping and eager.
he spread your legs as wide as they could go. you felt so vulnerable underneath him. you’d never even hugged the guy, yet now you were there with your glistening cunt twitching in front of his face.
he held your thighs as he leaned in and look a long lick from the bottom of your sopping pussy all the way up to your puffy clit. he moaned as the taste of you infiltrated his senses, taking over his head. he knew just from that one lick alone that he was addicted.
“oh my god…” you trailed off, your hand finding his hair again to hold on to.
he started flicking his tongue up and down your folds, pushing his face into your cunt as deep as he could. he wrapped his lips around your clit, making out with it and drooling all over it.
for a moment, he pulled back to just look at your pussy. spread your lips with his thumbs, watching your drooling hole convulse.
“fuck, baby,” he nearly growled.
he couldn’t stay away for long and his face was buried back into your pussy a second later. he swiped his tongue back and forth against your clit, his eyes fluttering closed at the taste and the feeling of it.
“mmm,” he hummed into your pussy. “so sweet, baby. tastes so good. could’ve been eating you out since the day we moved in together if i knew you were this sweet.”
you could barely process any of his words, so lost in the pleasure he was giving you. his tongue worked your pussy like magic, slurping up your arousal and nibbling on your clit and thrusting in and out of your leaking hole.
“jake,” you cried out, tugging on his hair. “‘m close, fuck. i’m so close.”
jake dug his fingers into your thighs, frowning slightly in concentration. his tongue continued to move rapidly on your hot, gushing cunt.
the knot in your stomach suddenly snapped and your entire body fell weak. your eyes rolled back into your head and you fucked your hips against his tongue to ride out your orgasm. he moaned against you as the taste of your cum dripped down his throat.
he left your pussy with a kiss before sitting up on his knees. staring down at you, so sleepy and fucked out, he wanted nothing more than to stuff his cock deep inside of you and just pound until you both went dumb.
jake rubbed your thigh, watching your eyelids grow heavier and heavier.
“can i fuck you, baby?” he asked, slightly nervous about what you’d say.
you were tired, clearly. he wasn’t sure if you’d want to.
“yeah, jakey,” you said sweetly.
his heart throbbed at the nickname, and the fact that you were going to let him fuck you. the idea of what your tight cunt would feel like wrapped around his cock made him lightheaded.
he was quick to rid himself of his clothes. he was hard from eating you out and only needed to jerk himself off for a second before he was ready to put it in.
he lined the pretty pink tip of his cock up with your slippery hole and eased his way inside, not wanting to hurt you. he watched your reactions closely.
you looked up at him, your jaw falling slack at the feeling of his cock slowly filling your pussy up. your legs shook as he pushed himself to the brim, the tip of his cock hitting the spongey spot deep inside of you.
“oh,” you whimpered. “feels so good. i’m so full.”
“yeah, baby?” he cooed. “you nice and full of my cock?”
you nodded rapidly, sitting yourself up slightly so you could see his cock slowly slide out of you before pushing back in. your walls fluttered around him.
your pussy was so warm, wet, tight, and absolutely intoxicating just like how he knew it would be.
“such a good pussy,” he moaned, holding onto your hips as he thrusted. “got my dick all wet in your sweet cum, baby.”
there was a creamy ring of your cum around the base of his dick, which made a lewd squelching sound every time he thrusted.
you just whimpered in response, turning your head to the side. he was fucking you so deeply, dragging every inch of his long length through your tight walls.
you held onto his biceps, digging your nails into his skin. he bit his lip, looking down at your pretty supple body and the way you just laid there and took it, letting him fuck you nice and good.
“‘m close, baby,” he told you, grabbing your chin and turning your head so you were looking up at him again. “where do you want me to cum?”
you were so sleepy and fucked out that you could still barely comprehend his words. you also were starting to feel your second orgasm brewing in your stomach which made it even harder to focus.
you just babbled some incoherent nonsense.
“words, honey,” he said, squeezing your thighs. “tell me where you want my cum.”
“inside,” you cried out, tightening your legs around his waist. “wanna be filled.”
“fuck,” jake hissed. “i’ll fill you up real good. i’ll make you nice and warm, yeah baby?”
“please!” you yelled. “please, i need it.”
your words sent him straight over the edge. he choked on a moan as ropes of his warm cum spilled inside of you, drenching your walls.
seeing him hit his orgasm sent you over the edge as well, and suddenly you were clenching around him, sucking him completely dry.
waves of sweat and pleasure and euphoria washed over the both of you. you swear he was sending you to another dimension where the only thing you knew was pleasure and jake’s addictive cock.
he slowly rocked his hips in and out of you, milking both of your orgasms until you were both done and spent.
by then, you were both exhausted. he slowly pulled out and collapsed next to you. the two of you laid on your backs, staring at the ceiling in shock at what you’d just done.
you went into his room with the expectation of a little bit of comfort after your awful nightmare, not to have been given two orgasms.
for a few minutes, neither of you said anything.
then, jake spoke up.
“so, did i get you to forget about your nightmare?” he asked, turning his head to the side to look at you.
at that point, you couldn’t even remember what the nightmare was about.
“i think you did,” you answered.
he pulled you into his chest and kissed the top of your head. within a few minutes, both of you were asleep in each others arms.
-
a/n long jake smut for 1k and bc im horny for him.
thank you for reading <3
#enhypen#enhypen smut#enha smut#enha x reader#enhypen x reader#kpop smut#enha jake#jake enhypen smut#sim jake x reader#enhypen jake smut#jake enhypen#jake sim smut#jake x reader#jake smut#enhypen jake#jake sim#sim jake smut#sim jake
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⤷❝Mine To Love | Coriolanus Snow❞ˎˊ-
⇢☾Warning: NSFW | Snow is his own warning, mentions of killing, mentions of caging/locking you up (doesn't do it though), hair pulling, breath play if you squint, creampie, unprotected sex (wrap it dumbfucks), pinv sex, blowjob, male masterbation, cunnilingus, mating press, mentions of Lucy Gray, no spoilers | lmk if I forgot anything!
⇢☾Pairing: young president Snow x fem! Reader
⇢☾Summary: Snow realizing his feelings for you, being fucked up about it and fucks you!
⇢☾A/N: don't romanticize, it's dark romance so y'all are warned! This is set in the same au as The Study (you don't have to read it beforehand but it's recommended)
< masterlist > < bc: @cafekitsune > <tag list>
It started slowly, so slow that Snow didn't even realize it. It started with that night in the study after he had you. He didn't touch you again, denying himself of you. You, his wife, a little bird stuck in a cage. The First Lady of Panem was nothing but a doll, a showcase piece for the country.
You played the role well enough, but you weren't a doll at all. You brought life in what was otherwise a stone-cold mannor. The workers cook your favorite, making sure you're the most well-accommodated. Like a Queen. How their shoulders relax and the smile that springs up when they do the tasks that you assigned them. You earned their respect and their loyalty.
You were dangerous yet harmless. It baffled Coriolanus to no end. It started slow. He coincidentally met you in the hallways more and more. After that night, you couldn't make eye contact with him, no longer did you greet him with an awkward hello or a shy smile.
You look down at the floor whenever he passes you by, your body flushing from the mere second of proximity. So obvious and adorable. He loved how easy you were to read, how open you were. Whatever your lips hide, your eyes show. Whatever your soul hides, your body shows.
It started slow. The monthly dinners with the First Lady turned weekly. Every Sunday now he had you sit across him for dinner and he would ask you about your day. Just to be polite, mind you, don't look into it. He would be annoyed by those one-word answers but would never show it. His fingers subtly grasped the glass of wine tighter than he should, his heart pricking his brain into paranoia. ‘What else?’ he wanted to ask, ‘Stop saying it was good. Tell me what made it good.’
Instead of uttering those words, cameras were placed on every inch of the manner with the audio functions so everything is recorded for his and only his view. He watched you walking through the library, your fingertips touching the spines of the books you already read (which was most of them), you didn't even realize new books were added to the collection, all similar to the ones you liked. He watched you stroll the gardens, your face in a frown at the neverending white roses. A red rose and several other flowers were added the next day.
It started slow. He began to talk about his day more and more trying to fill a silence. He started asking for your opinion and oh, how that lighted your eyes up that you were finally doing what you were meant to do. Supporting him not as a doll but as a wife. You begin to talk about your days more, trusting him with your day-to-day activities. You tell him about friends and family, something he wasn't interested in (he has files on every single person you mentioned).
The nights that were dedicated to his needed sleep turned into the witching hours in which he would stroke his cock over the memory of you. His mouth biting into the pillow to stop his groans, hearing them would mean admitting his need for you and he rejected that notion. His cock was oversensitive because he couldn't stop. He couldn't stop fucking into his fist, again and again thinking about you. Not just your pussy but you. Your desperate moans, your lips marking his neck, your slick walls, and everything of you. Your tears, your head on his chest when he had fucked you. Everything.
He wanted to pin you against a wall. He wanted to bend over during dinner. He wanted you on his lap in his study. He wanted to push you to the bed and fuck you until the bed breaks. He wanted you!
The realization made him spill onto his bed sheets for the nth time. A gasp escaped his lips as he realized how deeply you are rooted in him now. He needed to kill you. He can't afford this again. Whatever this is. Obsession? Love? Was there ever a difference? He needed this to end.
‘You don't deserve to be loved,’ he thinks, you were no Lucy Gray after all, you were different. You could never compare to his first and only (not anymore) love. But he had caged you, he had you and knew your every move. The rumors that spread of cheating were seized along with the man who flirted with you. True to your words, you hadn't fallen to the temptations of the Capitol, rejecting their offers politely rather than basking in their attention like before.
‘Good,’ he thought, he had killed everyone who had touched you and it was hard to hide the evidence. “I am so much better than her,” he muttered, “I could do so much better.” He asked himself, ‘Why? After all the promises I made to myself of never repeating the mistake.’
He didn't get a reply but he dreamt of you.
Breakfast had passed, lunch too, he hadn't seen you once today. A quick peek at his monitors showed that you were sleeping in your room. He clenched his jaw, a part of him hating you for sleeping in because it deprived him of seeing you. A part of his heart warmed because your hair was a mess, the shirt you were wearing while sleeping was his, and you looked so darn pretty.
Coriolanus convinced himself that he was going to your room to wake you up. Nobody should sleep this late into the day. It wasn't healthy, and he needed the First Lady to remain healthy. That was all.
He stepped into the room, his footsteps quiet so he didn't alert you. He sits down on the bed, your sleeping figure beside him. Your mouth had dried drool on the corners which made him disgusted but amusement all the same. His hand went to your cheek, he couldn't control the action of his thumb stroking your cheek.
“I should lock you up forever,” he whispered as softly as possible, almost inaudible. “In this room, so no one can see you but me.”
He knew by now his thoughts weren't normal and it would never be. That's him and he had accepted himself. He leaned in closer, his lips inches away from yours. He stopped right before he closed the gap. He takes a deep breath, taking in your scent before pulling back.
His hand goes to your shoulder, he shakes you. “Wake up, bird,” he said, his eyes softening when he saw you wake up and peer at him with confused eyes. You yawn, and sit up, your eyes wide when you look at him. You rub them with your hand and blink.
“Is there anything wrong, Coryo?” You asked softly, “Anything I can do to help.” “You should shower and eat first,” he said instead, “and next time don't sleep in. I don't like indiscipline.”
“Sorry,” you mutter, “I was finishing a book.” Your eyes flicker to him, “It's nice by the way! I will tell you about it during dinner.” He wanted to hear about it now, he wanted to pull you closer and kiss your lips, he wanted to push you into the mattress and breed you. He wanted to clean you up after and feed you every kind of feed.
He clenched his jaw, trying to get rid of such thoughts. “We'll see,” he said before walking out of the room, accidentally slamming the door. The first sign of Snow losing control.
The second sign of Coriolanus losing control was how his breath hitched when he saw you during dinner. You are wearing yet another one of his shirts (how do you even get your hands on them) and that's it. A white shirt that reached your knees, you had forgone pants and opted for shorts that couldn't even be seen. Your legs were in complete view, the same legs he wanted wrapped around his waist.
He didn't say a single comment even when it was clear you were waiting for one. ‘Were you trying to seduce him?’ he thinks, ‘Or something else.’ He felt paranoid about you wearing his shirt. Did you want him? Want him to bend you over, press your face onto the table and fuck you like you were an animal?
He felt his pants getting tighter from his thoughts, flashes of what he could do to you, what he had done to you. He couldn't focus as you talked during dinner, he made a mental note to watch the cameras later to know the words you had blessed him with.
It hits him like a wave when dinner ends and you come to him with a book. Tabs were spilling out and it was a hardcover of an old classic that he had to read during the academy.
“You once told me that you liked this book, I spent last night annotating it! I did a few finishing touches before dinner…”
That explains your attire, you were busy formatting this gift for him. He took the book from your hand, he wanted to throw it across the room, he wanted to set it on fire. It was now his most precious treasure, more important than Panem itself.
The truth he denied washes over him. Making him take a sharp breath and your eyebrows etch together in concern. He had once a girl dedicate songs for him, now he had a wife dedicating booms for him. ‘It would be a mistake,’ he told himself, ‘It won't be a mistake if I don't repeat the past.’
The desires he shoved at the back of his mind sprang forward and he made a decision. The third sign of Coriolanus surrendering to himself was that he had everyone including the guards leave the dining room. Making your eyes widen from the sudden instruction.
“Is there anything wrong-” you begin to ask before Snow interrupts you. “Here is what's going to happen now. You're gonna be on your knees, you'll take my cock in your mouth and you'll make me cum. Then I will take you to our room and I'll fuck you until you can't remember your name.”
You blink once, twice just staring into his eyes that revealed nothing before you went closer to him and got down on your knees for him. “Like this?” You asked, breathless, your cheeks flushed. He smirked, “Exactly like this, pet.”
“Now part those pretty lips for me,” he said as he unzipped his pants and set his hard cock free. He lets out a chuckle as he sees you eyeing his cock like a long-lost lover. Guess he wasn't the only one thinking about that time.
You part your mouth wide enough for him as he pushes his cock in slowly. No matter how desperate he was a gentleman for his wife. He knew better than to gag you. He stopped when his cock had completely disappeared, his length engulfed into your wet, hot mouth.
He throws back his head as his dick hits the back of your throat. He relishes the sound of your choking around his length. He lets out his groan, trying his hardest not to cum down your throat so soon. His hand is in your hair, keeping you in place like an obedient pet.
You try your best to take in a deep breath as your tongue swirls around his length as much as possible. You weren't the best at blowjobs, but you knew the sloppier the better. Saliva ran down your cheek as you tried your best to focus on his cock underside, your tongue dragging itself across a pulsing vein that reached his cockhead.
You moan around his length as the taste of pre-cum bursts in your mouth. You close your eyes and try your best, bopping your head up and down. You clenched your fist, trying your best not to gag when his cock gets deeper into your throat.
Meanwhile, Snow was a wreck of a man, the heat of your mouth ruining his capability of having coherent thoughts. You were sucking his soul through his dick it seemed to him. His fingers tangled in your locks, gripping your hair tighter as a way to anchor himself to reality.
His blue eyes dilated to almost black as he looks at you taking his cock so well. Like you were made for it. Made for his cock. Made for him. Meant to be his wife, his bird, his pet, and his love. It's destiny, he decided as he pulls you off his cock and uses his suit sleeves to wipe your mouth and chin.
‘Everything leads to this,’ he thought, as he pulled you onto his lap and pressed a kiss to your lips. The saltiness of his taste in your mouth does not deter his tongue from tasting you.
“Go to my- our room,” he whispered to you as he broke the kiss. “I'll be there soon,” he promises as he nuzzles into your neck, his lips kissing your skin. You nod and get off his lap. Your feet drag you into his room.
Meanwhile, Coriolanus takes a deep breath, trying to maintain whatever pathetic excuse of sanity he had held. It didn't work. His cock was hard enough to hurt and his brain made him think. He thinks of removing you, he thinks of keeping you. He thinks of plans to protect you, backup plans to make sure you remain untouched while still maintaining the image of the First Lady. His true possessiveness and obsession flares up in his mind.
‘It won't be a mistake if I don't repeat the past,’ he told himself, repeating that line to his head.
He takes a deep breath, a glance at the cameras shows workers and guards kept the halls clear and you were in his room and on his bed waiting for him. Waiting for him to ravish you as you kept playing with the buttons of the shirt, and your underwear on the floor. Your face was crimson but your lower lip was in a darker shade of red with how much you bitten it because of nervousness.
He lets out a huff of air before adjusting himself accordingly. Coriolanus Snow was many things, gentlemen included and gentlemen don't keep their ladies waiting.
You freeze as he enters the room. You swallow nervously, your fingers pausing on the shirt button you were playing with. He glances at the panties that were on the floor and he gives you a little smirk. “Take it all off, my wife,” he said as his hands worked to undress him. His suit was on the floor, his shirt joining it soon enough.
You have to press your thighs together as you see his skin again, a whimper escaping your lips at the sight. He was so beautiful, craved by the angels, breathed to life by the devil. Soon, his pants and boxers were getting ridden off.
You check him out, your gaze hungry. Your fingers shake with desire as you take off your (his) shirt. You let it fall, exposing yourself completely to him, like he did for you. His eyes rack you up, causing a flush to every visible inch of your skin.
“Open your legs,” he said, as he walked closer and got down on his knees for you. “I am hungry,” he said, while his lips pressed to your knee and his lustful eyes bewitched you. You had to bite your tongue to not let a moan from his mere words. You spread your legs wide, letting your cunt come into his view.
Your folds that were glistening with your arousal and your slit which was the cause of your juices fluttered around nothing from his gaze. “Exquisite,” he had whispered, the praise warming you up and making your pussy clench harder. “Eager too,” he chuckles, looking up at you but you refuse to meet his gaze.
“Have your meal,” you mumbled, embarrassed. He pressed a wet kiss to your inner thigh, making your breath hitch from the contact. A sharp moan escapes when he bites, his teeth digging into the flesh and your hand falls onto his hair. Your fingers grip the blonde locks but you don't try to push him away. Your legs tried to close around him, but his hands made sure to keep them spread as he liked it.
He pulled away, admiring the mark before he pressed another wet kiss to it. His fingers grip your thighs, they hold tight enough to leave marks too.
He takes in a deep breath, nuzzling into your thigh. Your primal scent makes him go wild, his nail digging into your skin as he brings his lips closer to your pussy. One swipe of his tongue onto your folds and he groans louder than you have ever heard him to do so.
“You taste like fucking candy,” he lets out, as his nose bumps into your clit, his tongue messily swirling around your folds, gathering as much of your juices as possible. Your legs were all on his shoulders now as he all but pressed his face, burying himself in your cunt. He takes in a deep breath through his mouth before he begins to ravish you properly.
His mouth taking in your entire pussy and sucking it with such devotion it made you see stars. He laps at your pussy, his tongue never stopping to devour you. You pulled him even closer, your thighs closing around his head. The action only made him. You couldn't see it, but his eyes rolled back from the lack of air and your taste that quickly became his favorite.
His teeth pulled at the outer lips of your pussy, making you cry out and gush more juices. He licks it all up. Before his attention goes to your little bud, his mouth kisses it at first. Then he takes your clit into his mouth to suck without any mercy.
It makes you cry out, the soles of your feet digging into his back as your hips begin to rut against his face. You have no control over your actions. You were gripping his hair so tight you were afraid that you tore away a few strands. Overwhelming pleasure attacked all of your senses as he didn't stop his merciless actions.
You arch your back, your lips moaning his name as heat begins to gather in your body. You cry out, “Close! Coryo! Fuck!” Pleads begin to leave your mouth as your hips grind faster, your clit nudged his nose as his tongue is now inside your walls, fucking you with his tongue.
Your eyes widen, and you let out a silent scream when his teeth nip your swollen clit. You lay on the bed, panting as your pussy cums on his face. Your arousal makes a mess on his face which makes you even more slick when he pulls back and gets on top of you.
You looked into his eyes, his cold blue eyes that were nearly black now. He was panting, both of your breaths mixing into the air. With whatever senses you have left, you use your palm to clean up some of the mess on his face.
As soon as you finish up, he holds your hand. His mouth on your palm with broad strokes of his tongue he licks the remaining of your juices clean. “Can't let it go to waste, my bird,” he whispered to you as he leaned down. His body caging yours or were you caging him down with your legs around his waist? He pressed a kiss to your cheek. Sweet and gentle, and so unlike him but you don't dare question his affections. May it be sweet or savory, you accept it with your arms wide open.
“Want you,” you whispered to him. “You'll have me when I see fit,” he replied, his mouth pressing open-mouthed kisses to your neck before they reached the flesh of your breasts. One of his hands squeezed your breast and his thumb rubbed circles on your nipple. His lips paid attention to the underside of it, licking the skin around the round flesh before his teeth sank in making you gasp. He sucks harshly, his hold on your breast getting rougher as he forms the mark on your skin. When he's assured that a hickey will be formed, his lips pull back and he presses a kiss to the mark.
“You're mine,” he whispered, his lips brushing against your skin before he takes a nipple into his mouth and sucks just as harshly as before. You moan, “Yours, Snow!” Your hands on his shoulders, your nails digging into his flesh. His fingers play and squeeze your other breast while he continues to suck your bud. Your cunt despite having a previous earthsharing orgasm begins to pulse with need. You whimper, “Corio, please!”
Coryo pulls away, his eyebrows etched in annoyance, as much as he likes to hear you beg, he would rather focus on his task of marking you up. He leans up and presses his lips to you. You moan into his mouth as you taste yourself on his tongue. Your fingers tangling themselves into his curls bringing him even closer to you. He breaks the kiss, “I'll teach you to be obedient later, my pet.”
You let out a whimper when he pressed a hard kiss against your lips. His hands travel down to your hips. “Get ready,” he whispered to you, “I meant my words.” I'll fuck you until you can't remember your name. Remembering his earlier words, you whine loudly, “Please!”
His hand grips your hip tightly as his other hand holds his hard cock and guides it to your entrance. Just to be a little tease, he swipes his mushroom tip all over your cunt, his cockhead bumping your swollen clit making you arch your back and your nails dig into his flesh harder, making him moan as well.
He finally pressed his tip into your slit, his cock gliding in smoothly because of how wet you were. He groans as his dick gets sucked into warmth. His head is between the space of your shoulder. He was panting, his hot breath hitting your skin as he pushed in inch by inch. Your hands are on his back, your legs around his waist as you encourage him to go deeper into you with your soft moans.
His teeth sink into your neck to stop a groan, as his cock reaches your deepest spot. While your nails drag themselves across his back to create red lines. Both of you finding ways to anchor yourself to reality, to not go insane with the pleasure you find in each other.
“Move,” you plead, “Please, Coryo, need you to fuck me. Need you!” Snow decided to have mercy on you both, his hips began to move shallowly, and he refused to completely pull back. He refused the concept of depriving his dick of your sweet, wet pussy. “Faster,” you beg, his deep thrust hits at your every spot, some you didn't even know existed. It fried at your senses, your mind going haywire, your body getting desperate for another release.
“No,” he barks near your ear, his mouth biting your earlobe before he begins to kiss your jaw and then to your collarbone. His lips suck purple and blue bruises on your skin while his hips grind into you. Making you go dizzy and insane with how his cockhead kept grazing your g-spot.
“Please, please,” you babble, “You're fucking me so good, Coryo! I can't take it, please! Fuck me harder, love!” His hips had stopped moving as he heard your words. His head leaned up to you, his lips brushing against yours as he whispered, “What did you say?”
You looked straight into his eyes, not hiding the love you had for him, letting it flow through your words and your body. “Love,” you whispered, your lips pressing a delicate kiss that could shatter everything you had built with Snow. “I love you,” you whispered. One of your hands moves to his cheek, caressing him. “You don't have to do anything in return, just know that I love you.” You smile at him, knowing it's more likely that he won't ever return your feelings.
You prepared yourself for a harsh rejection but instead, his hips begin to move again. Harder, faster than before, his cockhead kissing your cervix with his thrusts, his fingers digging into your hips marking it. You won't be able to walk later but that didn't matter.
What mattered was how perfect Coriolanus had begun to fuck you. No, it wasn't a fuck. This was something more. Something changed with your confession, something changed and will remain changed for the rest of both of your lives.
One of his hands reached upward, his fingers snaking around your throat. He pressed it in, not enough to block your breathing but enough to make you lightheaded. Your pussy which was already tight, clenched around him further making him groan right against your ear.
“Lover indeed,” he whispered, his words that you nearly missed, your heart understood what he meant. You gasp, “Kiss me.” You knew that even without him saying those words, he could love you all the same.
Snow complies, his lips clashing with yours. His hips rutting into you as his hands guide your legs into the mating press position, making you cry out into the kiss as his cock reaches even deeper than before causing a small bump into your stomach that neither of you notices.
The kiss got open-mouthed, desperate with how his tongue tangled with yours. It was filth filled with the pathetic, insanity of love you both felt for each other. His thrusts got faster, and sloppier as he was close to his end. Your cunt pulsating around his length as you too were close to shattering again.
What it took for both of you to reach the end was him breaking the kiss to whisper, “I should kill you. I should kill you for making me a lovesick fool again.”
The words even when you know can mean your doom makes you cum like nothing else. Your lips cry out as your walls begin to milk his cock for what it's worth. He groans into your mouth, letting himself feel your fluttering cunt before he thrusts into you once, twice, and finds his release. His cock spilling into you, his cum painting your insides white, marking you.
He pulls out, his back covered with scratches, his curls clinging to his forehead and his lips swollen from the kisses. You looked just as much of a mess as he did, with marks all over your body.
He thinks to himself as he lies beside you. He wasn't going to kill you now. Not in ten years or fifty but your end would only be when he decides.
He loves you after all, in his twisted way.
tags : @stelleduarte @nowitsmissing @lifeonawhim @le-lena @justacaliforniandreamer
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