#which is always a real hit.
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i love TAing. some parts of it are stressful but running office hours and just getting to talk through a concept with the students until we've identified the source of their confusion and successfully resolved it is so satisfying and fun.
#and i know a bunch of fun facts to throw in that they appear to find genuinely fun!#e.g. 'worms are one of the only commonly studied multicellular organisms that we can freeze'#which is always a real hit.#a couple of them asked me to explain my research to them today???#and they said they thought it sounded 'cool' and 'sci-fi'#which makes me feel :')#and they asked for grad school advice! i feel so USEFUL. they're so likeable and interested in stuff#even the ones who are clearly suffering under the weight of only being kind of interested and really wanting to pass the class#1. are showing up and asking questions! which i appreciate!#2. are obviously trying to think through the concepts and light up when something becomes less confusing#and i am very grateful to them for putting in the effort. and i hope i repaid it with useful information about how to pass the exam.#box opener
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you always land on all fours
#umineko#umineko spoilers#ikuko hachijo#ikukos turn for a more serious piece... the old man has reigned for too long#now. INCREDIBLY LONG INCOHERENT TAGS RANT INCOMING FAIR WARNING HAS BEEN GIVEN:#it makes me so so sad how little discussion there is about specifically ikuko because imho she fits so neatly into a lot of the more#overarching Big Themes of the game in a way that i have not ever really seen people take notice of or point out in a meaningful way#like even just off of the top of my head. the significance of names and what it means to go by a name that's Not Yours (she has like 4+)#what it Means to be a witch how it represents a person's deepest insecurities and flaws & how its at its core a coping mechanism#the fact that it takes two to create a universe and trying to do it on your own anyways has the capacity to bring you intense misery#^ (how she's shown to be extremely dismissive of her own work and skill until a collaborator comes into her life and helps/encourages her)#and even the family/patriarchy/misogyny stuff that is so prevalent in the rest of the game comes back around to her. even her Only Friend#(young&stupid atp to be fair) remarks that shes Weird for being unmarried + the little she does say about her past invites the question of#to what extent her self-image stems from her family deeming her a freak outcast & effectively disowning her while celebrating her brothers#and i have lot in my mind about the witch thing specifically because i think her particular situation is very reflective of what umineko's#entire magic system and fantasy facet as a whole is meant to represent for an individual. from what little we see of (what is presumably)#her Real personality she is shown to be deeply self conscious in a way that is JARRINGLY diametrically opposed to both 1.) what we see in#featherine and 2.) what we see when she is acting as a Public Figure. because both of the above are very much purposeful acts that she is#putting on in order to obfuscate her true self. and i have always been very resolute & adamant about not totally equating her to featherine#not only because im very firmly in the camp of “featherine is the avatar of the Pen Name & tohya is part of her too” but also very much b/c#i feel very strongly that the stark differences between the two are very centrally relevant to her character & her psyche. as is the case#with most other witches featherine's personality traits serve to reveal/magnify a lot of ikukos inner workings by playing on her#insecurities/reversing them e.g. ikuko being very quick to downplay her skill/achievements becomes featherine being the COMPLETE opposite#to the point where she barely registers even other witches as living beings rather than just fun touys. BUT even though i do champion the#ikuko/featherine separation so hard i ALSO think it is purposefully relevant that at first glance the line between them seems so blurry#her introduction implying a more nebulous separation between her reality/fantasy counterpart is i think is an intentional move on her part#like it is part of the front she is putting up when acting as the Author. as opposed to Ikuko the person who we (in a way ironically very#similar to the way that the Real Battler is presumably only shown during the boatscene) only very briefly get to see take up screentime#which even on a meta level lines up very well with her apparent underlying nature as a like. extremely private largely reserved/shy person#hit tag limit but if by some miracle anyone is still reading this thank you... please see ikuko with the love she deserves... ok ily byeee
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#happy anniversary to remembering this actually happened 😘✌️
Loki S2 Anniversary x Episode 5 - “Science/Fiction”
#mobius#loki#lokius#mcuedit#lokiedit#marveledit#hit pause on everything in favor of rewatching ep 5 the beloved rom com which is always the right choice 😔🙏#real talk y'all the elation felt after hearing the words 'single dad' might never be matched in my lifetime and i'm so okay with that#also the way don was over here doing all the heavy lifting lmao??#like this mysterious stranger sure ain't smooth but at least he's hot asldfjslkfjsgk#'are you still on the market' is just as insane as the fit check btw the hits really just kept on coming 💕#owen wilson#tom hiddleston#marvel#owenwilsonedit#dianagifs#(and yes my ep 4 set was ready but i was too busy with halloween asks to post earlier so we'll jump back to that one later 😂)
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love when ppl make random ass aus for their fave ship that r just nonsensical and crazy . anyways jegulus au in which the potter’s run an animal shelter and usually order their pet supplies online but one day james goes to a chain store and finds regulus, who hates every single thing abt his shitty fucking pet store job and ONLY stays bc having a shitty job getting to pet cats on a leash is better than having a shitty job and not being able to. anyways james sees a twink and loses a few brain cells so he just pretends he has NEVER had a pet before and asks for regulus’ advice to talk to him. in his nervousness james is like “so dogs can’t eat chocolate right hahaha that’s crazy i’d go crazy” and regulus is like “i don’t get paid enough for this”
#regulus black#james potter#marauders era#marauders#jegulus#snake in the lions den#when regulus finds out abt the shelter he’s like wait that’s so sweet what the fuck#and then he’s hit w the earthshattering realization that the idiot regular who always bothers him is actually#incredibly smart and talented and caring and#Oh G-d HIS EXACT TYPE!! THE MADNESS#very inspired by my real life shitty pet store job#Not naming names but a certain chain pet store which has a three letter name should burn#james: so lol dogs should eat right?#regulus: this is fucking unbelievable
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It's a minor detail but I'm so emotional over Doctor Who making the universal human language in the future based on Cantonese.
#doctor who#doctor who spoilers#listen there are a whole lot of loaded implications around the idea of a universal human language which i'm well aware of#but insofar as sci fic/fantasy stories have the concept of a human 'basic' language#it's almost always based on english/thinly evolved english#so to have doctor who make it cantonese is hitting me real hard in the emotions#especially because i've had so many conversations with cantonese elders about how they're afraid for the survival of the language#because even though the cantonese-speaking diaspora is huge; future generations are so often de-incentivized to know cantonese
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genuinely so amazing how sy's mind works....... he can make anything at all make sense to him but he Will do so in the most convoluted way possible....... opposite of Occam's Razor..... Shen Yuan's Harisen.......
#im pretty sure i or myself has said smth along rhesw linws before#but im always preoccupied with trying to find the best name for Shen Yuan's Instrument of Concoluted Deduction#i initially thought of a blunt instrument but concluded that while messier vlunt weaponry stills gets a job done fast#no...... it needed to be something useless........ something you could hit someone with but do no real damage....#i got really wxcited when i thought of harisens i think its perfect#giant paper fan which only real purpose is to whack ppl over the head in comical fashion#like yeab it could probably get. something. done eventually but its gonna be silly and stupid and take fucking forever
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in light of recent discourse
#doctor who#you cannot perfectly map real life politics onto doctor who#yes the optics of this episode are flawed#yes unit has serious issues#but like#this isnt real life#and because it isnt real life we know that unit are the 'good guys' more or less#within the world of doctor who think tank ARE wrong and ARE putting people in danger and DO need shutting down#and seeing unit#the FICTIONAL ORGANISATION which has no proper real world comparison because aliens arent real#as the bad guys here is massively overly simplistic#i do think the messaging is messy#and tbh this episode should have been different if rtd and mctighe wanted to criticise disinfo campaigns like this#but i will defend unit because they have characters i like and they protect the earth and most importantly theyre NOT REAL#and cannot be a complete parallel to any real world org because aliens are also NOT REAL (or at least not on earth)#i think it relates to a fundamental problem in the fandom#where people see the doctor and kate and the brigadier as Bad because they can be morally grey#like no actually people who mean well dont suddenly become bad and awful and unlikeable when they arent perfect#its nuance its always nuance the lack of nuance is killing fandoms and leftism in general#and its killing me that its happening!#we cannot win if we refuse to see beyond a simple binary good and evil#im digressing but god the discourse on this is hitting all the right notes to drive me mad#ive blocked so many people and im not sorry#yeah anyway tldr i will block you for defending space info wars. grow a brain
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my silly little zine/ manga haul ehehe
#i got the hq volumes just because ive always wanted the fukurodani/ mujinazaka match in print because it makes me crazy#im enjoying volume 2 of green yuri much more than volume 1! i feel like it's got a real sense of direction going now#tbh idk if i even like ranma but i asked if the store had the next volume and the guy had to get a ladder to get it down so i felt bad jdsh#the zines are all very silly and fun and i think the eating around 2 features a lot of local places so i wanna go check em out#always looking for new food spots#and i got the tokyo one bc ive officially hit the distance from my abroad semester where im reminiscing/ missing parts#the sword zine is about the lotr anime movie!! which compels me to actually watch it lol#and hirayasumi intrigues me... got it on a whim because the art style reminds me of stl and it doesnt seem to be romance oriented??#we'll see if it's any good lol#okay im done talking now byeeeeeee#portal of rambling
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#ok finally making a post about meds#I've not ever tried taking medication before. I was sorta raised with that classic 'dont rely on meds you have to learn to manage without'#I mean I was also raised with the idea that therapy is stupid unless you have 'real' trauma. and also like idk.#can't stay home from school unless your temp is over 100 or you're throwing up. etc. very suck it up mindset#so I was just really nervous to start. also of course worried about losing myself or whatever I know that's a silly fear but#it's also a common fear for a reason!!! anyways#so I finally was like 'I need to do something' when I realized I was so anxious I couldnt even get myself to go outside alone#like I just don't want to do ANYTHING alone to a detrimental effect. and it was butting into my ability to do my work...#for various reasons. but then ALSO adhd has been a constant issue with my work as well!#it is SO hard to write and draw on a weekly pace like I am without being able to focus#my whole life I've had these terrible nightmares constantly and I've always woken up constantly in the night#sleep has always been terrible so I've always dreaded going to bed.. ESPECIALLy because it didnt even make me less tired#it was more something that I just did because I had to.#but going to bed was always terrible. there have been times I was too scared to go to sleep for weeks on end...#I've been mitigating this for years of course. and recently I've been taking melatonin which has been helping too.#but I've also always struggled to get up. because I've always been EXTREMELY exhausted#but also anxious of what the day might bring... idk.#anyways it has all hit a point that I was like okay. I am doing as many coping mechanisms as I can. the psych said they were good too#but... it just has never been enough. it's never been enough to make me not tired it's never been enough to make me not scared#so I finally talked to the doc about it. and she was like youve def got smth wrong basically. which yah I know.. but yknow#anyways so I started taking wellbutrin. and I am so frustrated now. because it's WORKING#that constant looming sense of dread is gone. I'm excited to get up. I'm excited to go to bed BECAUSE I'm excited to get up#I feel like for years I've been holding on to the idea that I have to get up because I have to put something good out into the world#and I've been clinging to knowing that if nothing else. I am able to help other people feel better.#but now for the first time in my life I'm like. free of it. I didnt even know it was possible... and I'm so sad how much I've lost out on#and so frustrated how my whole life I've been told to put up with it and push through it. and treated like a failure for it being too much.#and just. It has only been 2 weeks. but the lack of anxiety is SO noticeable I'm so...#I'll never miss it. the adhd is still pretty present but like whatever. I can manage that better.#and I'm just crying because of all this combined.#I just. I hope I get to finally be the best I can be now. for myself but also for you guys!
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"I'm rather lucky," said Wimsey, with that apologetic air which seems forced on anybody accused of too much wealth. "I have an extraordinarily faithful and intelligent man, who looks after me like a mother."
I love it when a book looks me in the eye and goes 'yes my friend you are so completely and utterly correct and valid and always right well done'. bunter DOES look after him like a mother I am literally always saying this!!!!
(that note from peter's uncle where he describes bunter like... peter returned from the war with the man bunter, who was and is devoted to him. I have been thinking about this for weeks now. what a thing to say. what a way to sum up a situation a man and a relationship. *gazing pensively into the air with my chin resting on my interlaced fingers* was and is devoted to him.....)
#if you think I'm exaggerating: I think like 3 out of like 5 posts in my lord peter wimsey tag is just me ranting about exactly this#thank u dorothy l sayers for writing that for me specifically and personally almost a century before I was born#'I believe bunter would stick to me whatever happens' how could you do this to me (gratitude)#lord peter wimsey#mervyn bunter#love this bunter & peter backstory drop btw. interesting that peter seems to have actively gone out looking for him after the war#at least in peter's telling of it here. he was clearly in a real bad place when he came home so doubly interesting#also what an adorable glimpse into their everyday life. 'mooom where is --' vibes from here to the moon. 'excuse me my lord#I am engaged in the development of a plate' (a perfect sentence. will be using that to excuse myself from any number of situations#from here on out.) he has an internal telephone line to bunter in his flat. this is the best thing that could have happened#only at the beginning of the book so far obviously and I love that we seem to be diving into this stuff fully#after unnatural death kind of pulled back on the main character development in order to focus on the mystery plot!#awwwwwwwwwwwwwww and I just hit on a description of parker that made my whole heart melt. this was what was missing in the last one#happy to be back. also hard to not see the 'male loneliness epidemic' ideas and talking points echoes here#which is. something. no matter what is happening to men -- war. lack of work. mental illness. -- it's always women's fault somehow#the more things change huh lol. women don't need men anymore and that's the bane of society actually#oh yeah I guess the horrors of industrial warfare did something too but mostly it's those damn girls and who they want#or don't want to sleep with. kind of depressing to see someone a hundred years ago lampooning it in a way#that would not need THAT much adjustment to be about the current day debate :')
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metal and sage have the building blocks for interesting conflicts and dynamics if the writers just. do something with those. sage taking on a human appearance that metal cannot achieve due to his inherent role as sonic's foil, who both is and is not him. the restrictions he has compared to sage's freedom. artificial intelligence with the blessing to expand itself with no limitations VS machine tied to the whims of its creator, reliant on external tampering to become more than what it already is. sage offering metal a hand because she is fascinated, captivated, with the concept of "family" - would that not come across as condescending, or would metal take what he could get, even if it meant staying in the shadow of someone more "real" than him?
there is tension and potential for something venomous, and the stage is set for exploring what makes someone "real" enough for a familial relationship. there is space to explore aspects of eggman's thoughts on his creations, why he would bestow the role of a child upon sage so easily, if it's just a different type of familial relationship to the one he has with metal, etc. but someone has to have the guts to go there and i wonder if anyone does
#soda offers you a can#lore drabbles#metal could be angry about it and it could hit particularly hard when he's also not allowed to have a voice#sage could be forced to experience more Human Emotions as a result that suck real bad#from where we can further explore if this is what she wants after all. bc it would be so much easier to just be a Machine#and how about this more ���standardized” familial relationship that eggman is given with sage? does it actually work? does he really like it?#or would it more so make him realize how alienated he is from this kind of normalcy#the family he is capable of having must consist of his own creations which are made of ones and zeroes and metals#it's easier that way. more familiar. there's less free will and he can always reprogram if he needs to. a sense of control#but sage steps beyond that and breaks all that is familiar and you could make that really interesting#ok i need to go do school shit now fuck
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Two weekends of work later, and I've finally finished my hardcover version of @flying-guinea-pig's So You Want To Be A Demonologist! I've never bound a book before, so this was definitely a new experience for me, but I'm pretty happy with how it turned out!




Edit: lmao I lied about being done. Here's the updated version.
#adventures in bookbinding#best hits tag#transcendence au#for real though this is one of my all-time favorite fics and I'm so happy I'll get to keep it on my bookshelf now!#plus!! I learned a new skill! which is always fun#though I think next time I'll try sewing the covers directly into the signatures instead of just gluing them#that way it'll be a little sturdier#but yeah I've got a shit ton of couch upholstery left over from making the binding so maybe I'll do the other fics in the series too#who knows
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I was going to write them all caps but then I decided not to, you're welcome
I'm a little confused about if "Sneaking Out of Heaven" was somehow retroactively added to the album? huh Wikipedia calls it a streaming deluxe track. well in any case, I don't have room for it given I want to have an options for people who don't actually know IP.
edit: HAPPY BIRTHDAY IP?!?!!!
#i said this#polls#waterparks intellectual property#parx IP#intellectual property waterparks#waterparks#waterparks band#parx#intellectual property#oh man i was gonna go right for a night out on earth but real super dark...#okay but a night out on earth as the radio recording at the end which I FORGET and for some reason thought was on greatest hits??#until i listened to it yesterday. i am always thinking 'this. is waterparks.'
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I am here, once again, with my Ao No Flag propaganda
These two specific panels of Toma were the thing that made me think over a year ago “Man. I want to be like that too” as in KAITO drawing expression because—

The subtle shift of emotion, it’s present all throughout the manga, but this is what sold it for me. For no particular reason, it’s not even the best example, it was just what sealed the deal to me
#it’s the way his eyes open slightly in surprise when Seiya tells him that his friends refused to give an explanation when asked about#what happened in what I think is a way of them showing they care about Toma#and that surprises Toma since I believe he might have been doubtful his friends would forgive him after that#which man. idk maybe it’s because it hit home in some other things. it’s so good#Kaito handles the way the characters express themselves so good I’m always in awe anytime I reread any volume#it’s just. they feel so real in their flaws and mistakes and how they take it. for example our dear protagonist#man he is a wreck. but it’s understandable since he is going through a stage in life where he is still understanding himself!#and KAITO depicts it so nicely and lets him be awful. and let’s everyone be it too. they fuck up yes! but it’s not the end of the world#and he shows that too. how it’s okay to make mistakes but you have to owe them and grow from them not get stuck in them#it’s the little me inside of myself that was making me weep I believe#Ao no flag#blue flag#toma mita#yeah this is about volume 7 too#well i dont know it’s the way Seiya is older sibling anguish that hit me with a bat personally because 🤝. same.#and just. AAAAGGHHHH I’m going insane
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there need to be more rpg characters hitting my pc with the metaphorical or literal hammer i can’t take another game where you are clearly playing The Protagonist Who Is The Coolest Snartest Bestest Guy In Da Room. i just can’t… BASH THE PCS BRAINS IN. LET ME BE AN ACTUAL CHARACTER IN THIS WORLD.
#gang i’m going to be so for real i’ve had it up to here. especially with companion writing.#like where you can always tell that your character is always supposed to outshine them in every way but also be the sole light in their lif#holding them together. which like on paper can work for A storyline but it can’t be fundamental for all of them#i admit my tastes are strange i would love if there was a character who would just unavoidably hit you with a hammer but i mean#metaphorically. let them do impactful shit that might even be harmful to the player! let them be cooler let them be more powerful!#i just mean like. i just want to play a character and not The Character.#sorry hater pants on#snartest was a typo but i’m keeping it because funnay
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Good afternoon gamers!!! I miss F.inal F.antasy. I miss it a lot-
#pan rambles#I haven't played some in a hot minute and I'm crumbling-afibsfjsndi#I miss it a lot...#So much I've been struggling to get the motivation to continue Y.akuza 0-afisbkfsn#Not that I even have the time to play bc of assignments#But still#I miss it!!!#Maybe I'll try to play some Octopath in ky free time#I just missed my turned based battles#It's also why I think I'll prefer I.chiban's games over Kiryu (Minus the crush)#I love hitting things by pressing random buttons!! It Can be real satisfying! But Gameplay Wise. Kiryu isn't my favorite to play as-#It's not as fun for me compared to other games-ajfnsjdsn#Which is a shame bc story wise? I'm enjoying it!#It's just gameplay that kinda isn't my favorite sometimes#Anyways back to assignments! I'll work real hard so I can find the time to play Octopath!#I'll always prefer anime men over realistic looking men (The aro kicks in harder sometimes when they look realistic)
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