#which is Unfortunate that he never got to see their better sides...and only experienced how they were no different from tacchan :')

[the-nysh]

tfw Garou's initial "YAHOO!" when meeting Tank-Top Master isn't just because he's strong but also because he's genuinely excited to see what a 'real' hero has in store for him, only for his excitement to dwindle more and more and more as each encounter only makes him more jaded and reinforces his negative views on heroes

Yup, you got it. That's exactly what happened. :') The way he was SO exited at first, looking forward to meet and face some of the biggest/renown/strongest real-life heroes out there, only for each encounter to further sour and dampen that enthusiasm. Where their behavior and performance, both towards him, and how many would act in a self-serving manner favoring their own self-interests (like ganging up to kill him to inc their ranks or pride, etc) unfortunately only affirmed the worst beliefs he'd come to expect of them (where it went just as he'd feared; not as he hoped), leading towards his overall disappointment with them. (Now IF more had pleasantly surprised him with more of that idealized heroic kindness, or if he'd witnessed more altruistic/selfless acts of justice in ways that did NOT remind him of Tacchan's treatment or tactics, then things would be different, but alas...)

[hana-no-seiiki]

STILL INTO YOU

yandere batfam x cat villain! reader (+extra!!)

synopsis: moments wherein the batfam n co. realize that after all this time they’re still into you

status: unedited.

[AUTHOR’S NOTE:] Super sorry for the lack of fics everyone!! Lately I found out that my DID symptoms have gotten worse and that I’ve experienced a full blackout (and possibly more, I just have no memory of it). So I’ve just been trying to recuperate my mental health for a while with art related stuff. Which, on the positive side of things, means that I’ll be releasing a Webtoon (pilot) around this July!! Hope to see you guys there during the release!!

Can’t count the years on one hand

That we’ve been together

I need the other one to hold you.

Make you feel, make you feel better.

You never realized how much Bruce knew you until you two sat down and had a meal together. Why? You might ask. Well, you were supposed to have a dinner date with Tim today at the manor, but he was unfortunately caught up on a case. You were about to cancel it, maybe cause some chaos in town and then chill with Jason as revenge for your bestie bailing — but Tim insisted you hung out with his father instead.

The pair knew it was the only way for you to (A) Behave and (B) not sleep with Jason for the nth time that week.

Gazing at all your favorite foods displayed upon the excessively extravagant and expensive table you realized that aside from the second youngest, Bruce knew you the most out of everyone in the Batfamily by virtue of his contingencies and overall time as the Batman while you were training to be Catwoman’s successor.

It was so odd, seeing him so calm and not so hostile when you were around. Eerie.

“I’m sorry.”

“Hm?”

“I always saw you as a threat. Treated you like one. But you were just a kid stuck in a situation you didn’t have a hand on. I’m truly sorry. For treating you that way.”

“. . . Isn’t it your job? No hard feelings really. I’d be creeped out if you treated me so nicely — not the food though this is very much welcomed.” You ranted as you stuck a fork into your steak, pointing it at Bruce’s face. Yet, as much as how you were failing to achieve proper etiquette he didn’t seem annoyed more so . . . surprised?

“I hope to see you have dinner here again next week.” His hands stretched to awkwardly pat your head.

“Depends, will I have more of Alfred’s steak again?”

It's not a walk in the park

To love each other.

But when our fingers interlock,

Can't deny, can't deny you're worth it.

Koriand’r wasn’t an idiot. She knew about Dick’s lingering feelings for you.

Perhaps she may be. Considering the fact that she still tried to be in a relationship with him even then.

“Shit. Kitty? Kitty! Wake up you hear me?!”

“. . . I’m. . .” You coughed, groaning at the pain it triggered all throughout your body “ . . . here . .”

You raised your hand, too weak to reach his face you settled with holding his own. Dick squeezed your intertwined hands with a pained expression , and an intimacy unfamiliar to the alien.

But that wasn’t what made Koriand’r finally understand how hopeless their relationship was.

It was the fear in his face. His pretty features morphed into one of horror.

Ah, even after all this time. Dick couldn’t live without you.

Cause after all this time I’m still into you.

I should be over all the butterflies

But i'm into you (I'm in to you)

And baby even on our worst nights

I'm into you (I'm into you)

Let em wonder how we got this far

Cause I don't really need to wonder at all

Yeah after all this time

I'm still into you

Jason spent many, many grueling years under the influence of the LoA. And not once did his body forget the feeling of you.

The butterflies, the heart wrenching pain of being apart from you, and the fleeting, venomous hatred you two shared.

After all, it was your name that escaped his lips the moment he awoke from the dead. Your face the first on his mind. Your voice that he longed to hear again.

He had plenty of time to prepare for this moment. Months? Maybe even years.

“Hey, cool helmet. You a Deadpool fan or . . ?”

But even then, your appearance still made him more nervous than confronting his family once more. More nervous than fighting the villain that ended his life.

“Yikes, awful cut you got there. Need me to patch you up buddy?”

You had grown. He had too, even if it was through some magic, deus ex machina water. Seeing the change in your features, how you shed your youthful look of naïvete and grew into a beautiful/handsome/pretty specimen almost made him break all his plans just to be with you again.

“I know that you’re shy and all but I need words.”

“Yeah.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll be here til the vigilantes show up.”

For his revenge’s sake he hopes that you’ll stay for longer.

Recount the night that I first

Met your mother

And on the drive back to my house

I told you that, I told you that I loved ya.

You felt the weight of the world

Fall off your shoulder

And to your favorite song

We sang along to the start of forever

It was one of those nights when you intruded on the Batfam’s nightly patrols. This time your victim was Damian. And strangely, no one else. He explained that the rest were taking a break.

Leaving out the fact that he poisoned them with some self engineered laxatives.

It was relatively calm until a heist suddenly started in one of the banks you wanted to pick off. Damn.

“Hey, I didn’t know you listened to [Favorite Artist(s)]” You eyes widened at the sound of the music playing the background as Joker’s men began to surround you and Robin.

“Just a casual listener. How did you meet my mother anyhow?” Damian sheathed his katana. Opting to take down his foes by hand to hand combat as he peeled his eyes and ears to listen to you.

Besides he could see that your eyes weren’t on him anyways, so there was no point in showing off.

. . . Not that he was doing that.

“Huh? Well, I know everyone really.”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

“What if I don’t want to?”

He sighed, bashing a poor guy’s face with his knees, his hands adding force with a pull — yikes. “I don’t know why I bother with you.”

“She hated me at first. Courtesy of Cat Woman and the Bat being together.” You turned to him, and he ducks.

“Then I lost someone really, really important to me. More than anything in this world. More than this world itself.” Your whip meets a goon behind him. Both of you hear a splat sound as the man falls to the floor. “And while everyone was calling me insane, when everything was breaking down around me. She was the only one who didn’t judge me for . . . the things that I did.”

“She supported me and was there for me no matter what.” You gaze at the blood on your weapon and cringe. “And then I realized your dad was an absolute bastard for leaving her behind. So I took up the mask again and made it my mission to make his life miserable."

"Even after the dinner?"

"Especially. Wanna bet on how long til he snaps?"

"Deal."

And after all this time I’m still into you.

I should be over all the butterflies

But i'm into you (I'm in to you)

And baby even on our worst nights

I'm into you (I'm into you)

Let em wonder how we got this far

Cause I don't really need to wonder at all

Yeah after all this time

I'm still into you

Some things just,

Some things just make sense

And one of those is you and I

Some things just,

Some things just make sense

And even after all this time

Tim honestly didn’t think he had it as bad as his brothers. Sure, he watched your every move and had extensive digital libraries on everything about you, but he did that for everyone. He was more rational; a man that clung unto his senses.

No it wasn’t his actions that made him realize how dangerously important you were to him, it was the way he felt doing so.

After an excessively arduous mission, the first thing he does as he gets back home is to open up his devices and get back to work. Surprise surprise, the stress wouldn’t go away. Not even when he stopped to play some games or catch up on Dungeon Meshi’s last episodes. And that always, always made him relax.

Anxious, his hands subconsciously guide him to that one folder.

Click Click

Dozens if not hundreds of holographic photos, videos and even fan art of you surrounded him.

Tim stares at a video he took when he first found out your identity.

Curling up into a ball with a blanket surrounding him, he slowly drifts off to sleep. Your voice lulling him into his overdue journey to dreamland.

Yeah, he was more rational than the rest. Yet, some things just made sense. Like you being the only thing in this world that manages to make his heart race and anxieties run away.

I'm into You

Baby not a day goes by that

I'm not into you

Jon was a bit dense. But even then he could see the signs of his best friend slowly losing himself to love and infatuation.

He would have been happy,

if it weren’t for the fact that he had a crush on you first.

Being the sweetheart he is, he backed off, respectful of Damian’s feelings (even if the latter wasn’t of his).

I should be over all the butterflies

But i'm into you (I'm in to you)

“Woah, you guys are done already?” Jon landed. As soon as he heard that he’d be able to fight alongside you after what felt like years (it was a couple of weeks), he flew all the way from Metropolis in record time.

If he knew what awaited him he probably wouldn’t have left at all.

“Yeah.” You gave him a thumbs up. Your head laid atop Damian’s lap as the domino masked vigilante ran his hands through your hair. His gloves off to his side.

“C-Cool.”

Jon cried himself to sleep that night.

Even after knowing of Damian’s feelings all this time, he could never stop his own.

And baby even on our worst nights

I'm into you (I'm into you)

Let em wonder how we got this far

Cause I don't really need to wonder at all

Yeah after all this time

I'm still into you

I'm still into you

I'm still into you

[ NEXT PART : NOBODY GETS ME ]

[flightfoot]

I'm so glad you love Kira Kira so much!!! It's such an underrated season ahhhh. The only thing keeping it from my own top spot is the treatment of Rio. He's my favorite precure character of all time and I simply can't let it slide T-T

Oooh yes it's so good! Like, it has the most well-constructed character arcs for each of the cures of any season, most are more lopsided.

Like with Ichika! She loves making sweets, but she's not very good at it at first. She's not a lethal chef or anything, she just isn't very experienced and doesn't know a lot. I loved watching her slowly work together with her friends to learn how to bake. It's not like some instant thing, you just notice her slow improvement throughout the season.

She does have something she's naturally gifted at, and that's decoration! She's really good at decorating treats in a way that will bring joy to the person who receives them, to the point that Ciel, a baking prodigy, actually learns from her in that regard.

Himari's arguably the most blatantly autistic cure there's ever been, and that's saying a lot. She loves baking and is an expert on the chemistry of it. Unfortunately, she's been discouraged from sharing her passion in the past, since her classmates got bored with her infodumping about the subject. I love her character arc about learning to come out of her shell and finding a way to use her infodumping tendencies for good by finding a receptive audience who enjoys being taught by her!

Aoi has my favorite character arc of the Cures. I love how she was inspired by her idol to become a musician and rock out with her bandmates, and how she's going against what's expected of her because, surprisingly enough, she's the heir to a wealthy family. She doesn't have any interest in running the corporation though. I loved her finding her voice and standing up for what she wants to do!

Cure Chocolat has one of the prettiest designs in Pretty Cure, in my opinion! Akira's character arc has some weaknesses, but it's still compelling. She's got a sick little sister she's protective of, and she tends to put too much on herself. I didn't really like that the show emphasized those self-sacrificial qualities - seriously she's gonna burn out at some point - but otherwise she's great!

She also has one of the most blatant queer relationships in the show. Like Kira Kira never SAYS that Akira and Yukari are a couple, but it sure hints at it.

There's never been a Pretty Cure character quite like Yukari. Even Yui, who's also a cat, is pretty different from her. Like she has this thing going on where she's good at everything instantly and it gets boring, which is why macarons interested her - she actually FAILED the first several times and had to work at making those to make them good.

I don't even really know how to describe her, she's so catlike. I don't think she actually changes a lot like the others do, you just see more facets of her. I love how easily she's able to act and fool villains, making them think they have the upper hand when she's actually playing them like a fiddle.

So her starting off as this haughty, slightly conceited prodigy who didn't think much of Ichika's merely alright pastries (given that she's world famous and has trained under the fanciest bakers in Paris), but slowly grows to see that even if Ichika's actual pastries are lackluster, they have a lot of heart, a lot of Kira Kira in them, and trying to figure out why that is. Her whole breakdown when she realizes how she just... didn't see what Pikario was going through, why he freaked out and ran away, and how he was then infected with evil and taken advantage of and STILL refused to talk to her even after being purified... she became a lot better at reading people as the season went on. I really love how she reached out to Biburi especially. She might not have been able to do much to save her brother, but she can help her at least.

On the bright side, at least Pikario got to be the first guy to have a claim to being a precure? Even if it was just a temporary power-up and he didn't get a Cure name, he was still first on that.

Pikario's the second-best Heel-Face Turn character I've seen in Precure (sorry Pikario, but Setsuna takes the top spot). I love how understandable his motives are. He and his sister went to Paris to learn how to be bakers together, but she's improving by leaps and bounds while he's being left behind and is becoming more and more frustrated, and she's rarely even around anymore. And then the last straw, when he makes the waffles she complimented so highly before, only for her to tell him they weren't as good as the ones from before... it was honest, but no wonder he snapped.

I love that he and his sister still had things to work out afterwards and that all his problems weren't instantly solved once he was freed of the brainwashing, the underlying problems that caused him to be vulnerable still had to actually be fixed first.

He definitely got cheated, he was one of the most interesting characters in the season (and the franchise, honesty), but he was put in a coma for a substantial portion of the show and didn't get to join the team permanently. But what WAS there still makes him a top-tier character.

---

I adore these characters so much, Kira Kira is SO underrated it's criminal.

[actual-arrrchie]

What are some of ypurMichael/Jeremike headcanons? Could you share them with us?

Oooooh there's SO MANYYY These two are all I've been thinking about for over a year now and I don't plan to stop anytime soon lmao Putting a read more in there so you don't spend 10 years scrolling past this post

MICHAEL W. AFTON (voice claim: Kenai from Brother Bear)

His full name is Michael William Afton, he never mentions his second name to anyone for obvious reasons though

He was born in Utah

Autistic

Bisexual

Big sharp canines

He has vitiligo

He's a momma's boy

Pathetic wet cat boyloser

Clara and William divorced when the kids were very young. William got to keep them because he had better income and could provide "a better home" for them. He made it impossible for Clara to meet the kids again and told them that mom doesn't love them anymore. Michael didn't want to believe it but as the time passed, he eventually did

Clara was writing letters to the kids but William would burn them all before they could see them

Michael took the worst traits after William, unfortunately. He deals with sudden mood swings and serious anger issues

He was never taught a healthy way to cope with his emotions.

Michael sucks at explaining what he feels so he would often get frustrated and angry when people don't get why he's feeling a certain way

He's been dealing with night terrors every since his parents divorced

William always treated Evan and Elizabeth better than him so he feels jealous of them. Evan was too little to truly understand what's been happening around him but he did have a feeling that it's unfair, Elizabeth on the other hand was a daddy's girl and despite feeling like Williams wasn't giving her enough attention, she still always agreed with him and would stay on his side

Michael breaks stuff a lot. His room is always a mess because of this. He tore apart countless sketchbooks and notebooks, broke mirrors and even threw furniture around. After this kind of anger outbreaks, he always breaks down in tears and cries himself to sleep

Mike rarely looks in the mirror because of his many times people told him he looks just like his father. He never looks at family photos either

Michael and William have more in common than their appearance. Mike's small gestures and body language are exactly the same too. He hates it because people point it out all. the. time. There's nothing ha can do about it though

Even tho Michael hates his father, deep inside he still desperately craves his love and attention so he clings to any, even the slightest bits of kindness he gets from him. That makes it really easy for William to manipulate him and make him do whatever he wants him to do

Michael gets in fist fights a lot

He's not a stranger to violence in general but he's also really anxious and insecure. He always feels like he has to prove to everyone that he's nothing like William but most of the times it only shows how similar they are

Michael only cries when he's sure nobody can see it. William used to yell at him for crying when he was a child so he learned that he can never show any weakness

After the bite of 83, Michael experienced really bad panic attacks when he was exposed to animatronics or even his Foxy mask.

William would still force him to help in the pizzeria and make him work with the robots on purpose

Michael was forced to help at the diner/pizzerias since he was only 8 years old. Even when he was older, he never got officially hired there. William would just pull the "I pay for everything, you live off of my money so you owe me" card and make him work

He was anemic when he was about 13-14 years old, mostly because of how quickly he grew in that time and bad eating habits

Michael frowns a lot, not only when he's angry or irritated though. He tends to frown as a default expression which leads to a lot of misunderstandings

He's REALLY bad at taking care of plants

He loves cats and animals in general

JEREMY "REMY" FITZGERALD (voice claim: Seán McLoughlin aka Jacksepticeye)

Irish

Nonbinary [he/they]

Gay

Has two older brothers

Himbo

Big dumb silly idiot

Jeremy was born in Galway, Ireland and moved to California with his brothers and parents when he was 3 years old

They moved to Hurricane, Utah 16 years later and lived alone since

BIGGEST QUEEN FAN

Absolutely adores plants and has so many of them in their small apartment

Did construction work before getting a job at Freddy's

Has lots of religious trauma, all of it actually

Many piercings, most of them done by himself (idiot)

Has a big ivy tattoo

Was kicked out by his parents for being gay and struggled a lot to survive before starting a construction job. He even had to steal food a couple of times

Has ADHD

Has type 2 diabetes

Jeremy always dreamed about having a beautiful home with a big garden with lots of flowers and other plants in it but the best he got was a small old apartment filled with plants in pots.

They're very allergic to cats but that doesn't stop him from shoving his face into every kitty's belly

Jeremy was neglected as a child, his parents never planning a third child and not being too keen on having to raise another one. They put most of the responsibilities on their older sons which made them dislike their youngest sibling from the very beginning

Mary Anne and Patrick (the parents) never really tried to hide their indifference towards Jeremy, at east when they weren't in public. Because, naturally, they would hate for people to talk badly about them

Jeremy spent most of his childhood alone in their room, wandering the streets or spending time with Citlali, their best friend, and her parents. Remy adored them all and preferred hanging out with them over being with their own family

After moving to Utah he became very open about their identity. Moving away from his parents was difficult but also provided a whole new opportunity to finally be himself and make their own decisions

there is A WHOLE LOT more but this is all I've got in my head right now saiduhsada SHAMELESS PLUG TIME BUT YOU WILL LEARN A LOT MORE ABOUT MY JEREMIKE IN THE FIC I'M WRITING, IT'S CALLED "Insufficient" ON AO3

[rayssion]

TSATS, Finally!!

This's a very long post guys...

Idk if I have a natural ability to ignore responsibilities or I'm just genuinely not good at keeping promises. But yes, finally the long awaited review of tsats is here.

So, the general rating for me is 3.5, which is... Really good, considering the book,,

Now you know, points to talk about:

Firstly guys I want to tell you that, unfortunately the sun and the star had me run into a deep reading slumber, which is something I never expected it to happen. Idk if you noticed this but my favourite character in whole Riordanverse is Nico! And Will comes closely after him, so I thought tsats would only be a fast run to me, it's basically a solangelo fanfic just written by the original author. But as I ran the first 100 pages I found myself drained, I was bored, I was tired and we really weren't going anywhere. It was a displayer of Nico and Will's love for each other, and I'm sorry to be that person but!! I dislike it when the ship is just out there living and laughing like I'm sorry but I need them to suffer first then some smiles and laughs at the end would do (insert some offended face).

Yeah, let's talk real. I know we had to go through that introduction to know where exactly the two of them stand in their relationship to be able to observe the change and development later on, but it was very repetitive.

Nico is made from darkness, Nico had so much darkness, Nico lives in the shadows, Nico doesn't think he deserves love, Nico doubts Will's love, Nico feels he's not enough for Will. It all goes in circles and I didn't like it. Nico I know you're emo and such but I just think the narration focused too much in it on expense of getting good Will expressing.

And this coming from a big Nico di Angelo lover, I feel like we don't quite exactly know Will even after this whole book, there's yet so much to unfold about him, his mother, his life at camp, his feelings after all toa happened like his father was a teenager just like him and was the biggest loser ever (lol, I just love Lester), how come we didn't discuss that? Nico is a character we all know, we lived with him, we experienced every feeling he went through, he wasn't new to us which is not the case with Will. What's the difference between us and the troglodytes? All we know that he's a son of Apollo, a healer and Nico's glow-in-the-dark boyfriend.

I just felt the need to summarise because I felt that what I wrote could be compromised in better wording: the narration was too repetitive and too focused on Nico and his dark past™ which is not necessarily a bad thing but I just feel it'd be better if cut it a bit shorter and clear the stage for Will, because -surprise surprise- Will also has some dark parts (although not much like Nico, and yes I know the book touches the topic later on but it'd have been way better if we were introduced to it from the start thus it'd grow on us and would be very convenient later on. Tbh the book just goes "oh, Will also got a dark side, he must share it with Nico..." But what I'm saying is, we never were exposed to it, what's the darkness within Will? Those pigeons? His mother performing and him staying backstage? I feel like we could explore it much better) anyways, it'd also be really great if we got to experience Nico's dark past yet from Will's point of view more often, that way the whole communication arc would be better, because we will know that Will already had a solid image of Nico in his head (yes his lovely little emo boy with miserable history but we'll get to know what he knows about the Nico and also the flaws he had picked up in him) and as the time goes we'll get to experience that image altering.

I know someone will think "but it's a Nico di Angelo adventure!" Yes I know, but don't you think getting to know Nico, our adored character, from his boyfriend perspective would be much interesting? Come on guys, see the potential.

Let's rewind a little bit, so 100 pages, I'm bored I stopped reading for three days then picked the book yet again and..... Stopped after 50 pages ;-;

I'M SORRY BUT I REALLY WASN'T FEELING THE VIBES OKAY I KNOW IT'S TOTALLY MY FAULT AND I'M SORRY GUYS.

And picked the book for the last time today and finished it.

Oh yes, another thing that felt off for me is how Chiron and Dionysus are portrayed here, idk they felt so out of character and the whole "dO wE hUg nOw?" I'm sorry, that was cringe, dw it's on me guys.

And there were points where the writing was so inconsistent, I never read anything of Oshiro's work before, but it's so painfully obvious when his and Rick's writing styles clashes (ugly clashes) that it makes the book really obviously written by more than one author, and other points where idk if Rick is trying water down his style or Oshiro is trying to level the work up to the satire and sarcasm Riordan's books are known for. Anyways, it could use some editing (and it's definitely edited but not enough to mask every hole, because if a dumb person like me speed reading the book was able to pick all that then it's obviously not enough).

Also Nyx was stupid. Yes, that's my statement. Iget it you refuse to change but I hate how dumb her plan was. First of all, why leave Bob without guard? I mean you obviously have better chances in luring Nico and maybe killing Will if they don't have a Titan with them?? But yeah this's not about her.

I also hated we lost originality here, I already told you guys it read like a fanfic, but it really was a fanfic, every fanservice they could include they did include. For example the Hades allowing Bianca and Maria to talk to Nico once again, look I'm not complaining (as you'll read later) but really WHAT THE FUCK??! Weren't they reincarnated or whatever? How the fuck is that possible?

Also isn't Tartarus like, beyond the powers of the gods?? Then how is Hades going to retrieve whoever-was-his-name-centaure-satyr out of it? And just because Nico asked nicely?

Another thing, I know that you can issue a quest (just like what Percy and Annabeth did to rescue Grover in SOM, and like what Ares did in SON) but how the fuck do you send a prophecy?? Isn't this also too much of a godly power? Like Apollo (the god of prophecy himself) stated that they're way above him then how can Hades send one???

So we mentioned the narration, we've done the character portrial that I didn't like, now we're off to good stuff!

A big point! A huge point! For solangelo's relationship, I loved how they often had fights, disagreed with each other, hid things from one another, had miscommunication yet still managed to figure it out as mature humans whom are much better than half of adults nation. I loved how quickly one apologise once they realise they were wrong, I loved how they stayed by each other's side and how they supported each other, like bro it seems like they can't stay angry at each other more than five seconds and I love for it!

This's actually Rick's trademark (along with having Percy in everything he writes) that he always sets a good example for kids, younger audience who read his books have a good exposure to an excellent functional relationship not like some other booktok authors whom I'm not naming (totally not about you Colleen Hoover, you do you honey🙂).

Hiss-magisty and oh boy how much I love them! They were so cute I really liked how they looked up to Will, especially that the boy needed such encouragement because of the whole child of Apollo, underworld, tartarus things going on. And yet another point to tsats for representation (never forgetting Epiales).

Nico, Hades, Maria, Bianca!! You just have to love them!! They're literally my favourite family in the whole Riordanverse, yes I'm so madly in love with Sally and yes I love Percy but the Hades/di Angelo family?? That's where my discussion ends.

And speaking about family, can we have a moment of appreciation for Persephone like I truly loved her back from mythology (which I know nothing about, like she's Hades wife, that's it, yet I still loved her because she seemed nice, and she's nice!) This whole journey won't be if not for her, girl single handedly opened Will's eyes and her love for Nico??? Told you that's my family right there.

Lol I just remembered when Demeter was lecturing Persephone for not marrying a doctor and now I just know she loves solangelo, so yeah even grandma is an icon, I stan by it, that's my family.

Okay I also wanted to talk about the concept of grief and ptsd and how it was represented. This actually deserves a major applause because that's really how you write a good deep psychological analysis of losing someone and having to cop with it, especially that part when Nico tells how he just shunned all his memories away, how in his mind Jason just went to a quest and someday he'll return to camp half-blood as if nothing happened, because surprisingly it's the same method my brain took when my mother died, it's like all these years had been deleted and I was just brought to world after her passing, a lot of times I try to remember some particular incident from the time but I just can't wrap my mind about it, sometimes I became alert because for a minute there I couldn't recall her name, it was like all the pain associated with her just disappeared, it is locked far away in my brain and I still can't get access to it. So yeah, away from this pity party, I love how it was represented here, with Nico really suffering the trauma and how he eventually learned to let it go. (I cried at that mention and also when he was reunited with his family for that little amount of time).

Can we name the cocoa puffs?? Because I just adore them so much and I feel like Nico and Will will name them such cute adorable names and I can't stop thinking about that. Lol, percabeth are yet to get engaged then married and solangelo already has kids.

Ps actually but the pet names??? OMG NOTHING SWAYS MY HEART LIKE PET NAMES. I was pretty much hooked when I read "Noble McSacrifice" SSKFHIDJ

Another ps. I liked the whole Gorgyra thing as a way to show us their memories like a breeze amidst the flames every couple of chapters. At first I was like "wtf is this, did it happen or is it gonna happen or is this an alternate universe??" Don't blame me I was sleepy.

Yet another ps. I hated the "DREAM SEQUENCE" that just comes in the middle, like bro the boy just went to sleep of course I'd know this's a dream no need to point it out every time it was so annoying.

I think I covered all of the points I wanted to talk about, I was going to say "yay, first review with me having actual time to write it and think it through!" Yet auntie barged in in the middle and everything seems all over the place now.

It's like a characteristic in me now, heh. But yeah, sorry for the long wait, sorry for this shitty review, but bear with me please.

I totally adored this book once I figured out how to keep up with it ").

I'm yet to read a bunch of books all by Rick, hopefully I'll start with the chalice of the gods and come for a quick chat later.

Until then, eat, sleep and take care of yourselves♡!!

[childotkw]

Hi Jordan! Do you have any new murderous guardian angel snippets? Preferably with harry and Voldemort???

Also! Do you think reg would still be in Slytherin if harry was in his head sin he was a child????

Hello darling! I don’t have one on hand but I’ll pump one out for you 💕 it’s not fully Harry and Voldemort, but they’re both here, so hope that’s alright

And I think Regulus would always be a Slytherin, even with - or perhaps especially with - Harry in his head from a young age. Harry’s got his share of Slytherin qualities, after all 😉

———————

Harry stared down at the plate, then at the lines of cutlery on either side with a suspicious silence that had Regulus distracted from his own panic.

What? he asked, wondering if Harry might have sensed something he had missed. Is it poisoned? They wouldn’t dare, not in such a public setting.

‘Yeah, that’s not what I’m worried about,’ Harry replied with something like resigned amusement blooming in his chest. Regulus stared out through their eyes, trying to understand what the cause was.

‘We might need you in the lead for this one,’ Harry continued.

What do you mean? Regulus tried not to sound as worried as that remark made him. He had grown used to this arrangement between them, and in many ways, he appreciated having Harry in control during these encounters.

Regulus was strong but in the presence of the Dark Lord, he was…reduced. Harry held none of his reservations when confronted with Voldemort - seeming to revel in generating as much confusion and chaos as possible whenever the man was around.

‘I don’t know which cutlery to use,’ Harry admitted easily. ‘I know you get particular about this sort of thing, so maybe you should be the one eating?’

Regulus let his disbelief flood their connection. You said you were the Heir of both the Potter and Black Houses? How do you not know this?

Harry huffed, the noise drawing the attention of the man across from them. If it had ever left. Regulus couldn’t be sure, he had been trying not to think about him. ‘I was lucky to get food when I was a child, and then got busy fighting a war - I didn’t exactly have time for posh lessons.’

That just made Regulus sad.

“Are you alright, Mr. Black? Experiencing some trouble?” Voldemort asked, head tilted. There was nothing innocent about the curiosity in his voice. He sounded anticipatory, and when Harry raised their eyes to meet the man’s, the intensity of his attention was like fire licking at their skin.

“Just peachy, Tom,” Harry replied, and Regulus wished he had taken control when it was offered. Now all he could do was watch in horror as Harry continued, “Was just considering which knife to throw at your head.”

Harry!

‘What? He’d move in time, it’s not like it would hit him.’

And he would retaliate. Apologise! Regulus snapped.

Harry sighed, aborting an exaggerated roll of his eyes. He looked back at Voldemort and pursed his lips. “Regulus said I should say sorry,” he said, and any offence on Voldemort’s face vanished at the direct reference to their unique situation.

To the entire reason the two - three - of them were here in the first place. Voldemort had never been able to resist not knowing something, and Harry was unfortunately very good at capturing the man’s focus.

Voldemort watched him for a moment, eyes scanning as if he could peel back the layers of skin and see what lay beneath.

“I notice you’ve yet to say the words,” he eventually murmured.

And Harry snorted, crossing his arms and leaning back in his seat. “I only said Regulus wanted me to apologise, not that I’d do it.” His eyes turned to the wall behind Voldemort’s shoulder. “I don’t make a habit of offering insincere apologies.”

“Is that criticism I hear in your voice?” He sounded amused, and it calmed Regulus in turn. Amused was better than angry. So long as Harry danced the line carefully, they could get out of this with minimal bodily harm.

“If I started criticising your flaws we’d be here for a year,” Harry replied with a biting grin.

‘I won’t let him touch us,’ he sent to Regulus with more assurance than one man should be able to muster.

[dollwrites]

Omg hotd nonnie I love the name lol. YES I felt so bad for kid aemond you can tell he wanted to be friends with nyras kids, like when he smiled at them at the funeral, but they were such dicks to him. One of the things that made me love him was how he did a 1080 on his personality and went fuck it idc if nobody likes me, im doing me. And the fact that vhagar transformed him and made him confident 🥲 also idk about you but I literally combusted when they showed he put a LITERAL sapphire in his eye, I mean I knew it was coming because of the books but still actually seeing it oh my god it’s so beautiful. You described it perfectly he altered my brain chemistry lol.

I literally love you so much literally my top favorites of season one are aemond and alicent. AND I LOVE YOU for hating rhaenyra, her kids, and especially daemon I HATE THEM (I really fucking hate daemon with a passion) BUT NOBODY EVER AGREES WITH ME. They’re the fan favorites and people are so insufferable about them. So for some quick book lore neither side is supposed to be the clear “good guys”, yes of course nyra is the heir and should inherit but there’s so many things in the book that makes her not a good guy just like people on the greens side. But instead the show runners decided to make team black the “good guys” that do no wrong and team green the “bad guys” that have no redeeming qualities. They took away most of nyras bad qualities and made people on team green way worse than they were in the books. I could go on and on about this because it pisses me off 🙄 and honestly I hate them all even more in season 2. I feel like I have to give you a disclaimer I really really didn’t like season 2 as much as season 1, they changed a lot of things from the book and even changed a lot from season 1. But I’ll get into that once you finish season 2 lol. Unfortunately my favs for season 2 are aemond and aegon and I hate alicent, which I never thought I would say 😔

The dragons are my favorite too, I’ve always been obsessed with dragons since I was a kid! I love vhagar so so much I have like 3 different tshirts of her, stickers, paintings, and a model statue of her 🥲 people on social media were so mad at her when she ate luke saying she needed to die like how the fuck are you gonna blame a dragon for eating the dragon that attacked her lmao. Quick lore too I can’t remember if this is mentioned? But because vhagar is the oldest dragon and the only one that was alive during the conqueror’s reign she’s the only “war dragon” basically, she’s the only one that’s been in wars and is experienced. All the other dragons are relatively new and lived during times of peace. So vhagar is really that girl, she’s a badass, she takes no shit lol.

Keep me updated as you watch it, I wanna know your thoughts 👀

I’m not going to lie when I first started watching season 1 I thought rhaenyra and Alicent were gfs I was like 0h ! : ) and then Otto made Alicent go to viserys and I was like oh : ( BUT I STILL LIKE HER even though I’m on season 2 now. I think I’m on episode 4? I just got home from work so I’m excited to watch it hehe IVE BEEN FIENDING ALL DAY THIMKIN ABOUT IT

As far as rightful heirs are concerned, rhaenyra had that birthright and I do agree that she should be crowned however…. Have we considered…. That she’s boring :3 SKSKSK I KID BUT LIKE,;; I already suffered through snoreserys please do not make me sit through another boring monarch at least Aegon is a bit silly

SPEAKING OF AEGON…. I was so upset over his son that poor bb didn’t do anything to anyone 😭😭😭

Okay so I think either they didn’t explain it or somehow I missed it but what is the relevance to Aemond’s sapphire in his eye ?? I swear I was like unaware that it was a gem I was like idk why his bad eye glows like that SKSKSK WILD.

Aegon is growing on me… like a fungus… but I still don’t like the way he treats Aemond it really IRKS MEEE Aemond is fiercely loyal to his family and house and he deserves better !! I was so uncomfortable when they busted up in Sylvi’s room and made him feel all embarrassed though like she’s so milf I am very attracted to her too 👉🏻👈🏻 but Aemond strutting out of the room butt ass naked I was like “ok but… ur pants…”

VHAGAR IS SO COOL I WAS SO STOKED BC THEY DID MENTION THE THING ABOUT HER BEING THE OLDEST BIGGEST DRAGON… Grammy Vhagar…. Also it’s literally insane fans said she should be killed ?? I never even learned Luke’s dragon name but like it spit fire on her ?? And I assume that since she’s been to wars that she has that snap instinct bc I remember them alluding to the fact that dragons change after wars ? SHE IS LITERALLY JUST DOING WHAT ANIMALS DO

Ahhh this show has my brain working… I may have to dust off the sideblog for live action and drop an aemond fic or two…

[65ths]

Which song do you feel describes your character the most and why?

canon questionare.

gonna cheat here for a moment and mention three songs that describe finnick quite well to me. it's so hard to say there's just one, he's so complex, he wears so many faces, and so there are multiple songs that each tackle a side of him and what he's been through. they're all kind of similar in regard to the fact the path of being hurt, faking it, and having it chip away at you.

tldr: vampire by olivia rodrigo, you deserve an oscar by matt maltese, and free by florence + the machine

the first one is vampire by olivia rodrigo (lyrics below). i think it captures the unfortunate dream that is sold to every kid that goes into the games-- this idea of glory, parties, a forbidden paradise. i think this song specifically speaks to finnick and his relationship with the snow though because he is the one to hold all these secrets and he knows how he rose to power. he's the guy that all of panem should laugh and finnick feels stupid at times for having bought into those ideas.

hate to give the satisfaction, asking how you're doing now how's the castle built off people you pretend to care about? just what you wanted look at you, cool guy, you got it i see the parties and the diamonds sometimes when i close my eyes six months of torture you sold as some forbidden paradise i loved you truly gotta laugh at the stupidity

from there the lyrics only get more literal to finnick's circumstances and all that happened to him.

i used to think i was smart but you made me look so naive the way you sold me for parts as you sunk your teeth into me, oh bloodsucker, famefucker

you deserve an oscar by matt maltese (lyrics below). this song makes the little creatures in my head go crazy because it's just sooo perfectly finnick to me. he's the capitol darling! he's the guy! he's the everything, the poster boy for what a kid could accomplish and it's all such a deep and well constructed façade. there isn't a crack in this portrayal that he puts out and he does a lot to make sure of that, but the whole time he really is losing the grip he has on himself and his mental health

moisturize, your skin is dry ghosts are ringing off the bell tell your friends you're doing well call a doctor 'bout your health and i think you deserve an oscar for pretending nothing's wrong every day there's something else but you carry yourself like the greatest actor acting like the world is not breaking up before your eyes

free by florence + the machine (lyrics below). along the same lines as both of the last songs, except i think this song better describes finnick's mental state and all of how he's trying to manage everything that he's experienced and is feeling. the way he runs is simply not sustainable. he was always going to be break, and he does a bit over the years when he goes home but district 13 is really the height of that. i think there was so much of him wanting to cry out for help over the years and at least once or twice he would have in some way, but i imagine not in a way anyone truly understood

sometimes i wonder if i should be medicated if i would feel better just slightly sedated a feeling comes so fast and i cannot control it i'm on fire, but i'm trying not to show it as it picks me up, puts me down ... i push it back, but it keeps on coming and being clever never got me very far because it's all in my head and "you're too sensitive", they said i said, "okay, but let's discuss this at the hospital"

[traggalicious]

OKAY. so, first: thank you so much i love you. Second! Lazarus! Here’s a thingy I made for him somewhere else ^^

Character’s full name: Lazarus

Reason or meaning of name: Stole it from Lazarus (of the bible) who was a jesus type and died 4 like 3 days b4 jesus came n got him.

Character’s nickname(s): Laz, The Monster (as like. A title)

Birth date: I honestly didn’t think abt it cos it made my brain hurt

Gender: he/they dude! He’s fine w/ it/its but not 4 gender reasons.

Music for the mood: creature - half-alive, the nowhere king frm centaurworld, me and my husband - mitski

Basic rundown is he was made at a time where belos rlly wanted his curse *gone*, and had been researching ways to get rid of it. He came across that thing (the thing eda and Lilith did) to share the curse, and he’s like. Might as well try it. So he creates lazarus, and laz is a pretty loyal guy, like. Belos raises him w/ traits of selflessness and obedience, and ofc plays up the curse so when he finally tells him to do the curse sharey thing, Laz is all for it. It works well! Fortunately for belos and unfortunately for Laz. Laz is suffering, he nearly dies but the curse doesn’t let him, despite the fact that belos refuses to share palismen, and when he does (which is once) laz refuses for morality reasons. This is how he realizes “oh shit i was only made to die wasn’t i”, confronts belos, belos tries to kill him. But Lazarus is goopy. And we all know that belos being goopy means he’s still alive. And uhhh yeah he nearly dies, makes it out narrowly, and he lives in the woods on the isles, fuckin belos shit up, and experiencing a weird love-hate relationship w/ the bat queen and the locals!

Another thing that contributes to that is when he finds a scout afraid after they didn't do too well in training, and he decides to help, and he ends up having a mentor- like relationship w/ them-and one day they see his face. And at this point he's already got the rot creeping up his face, and. And they look terrified. They ask what happened. And he. He realizes. He scares them. He says it's okay, nothing's wrong- and even when they return to 'normal' he can't help but notice the glances they cast at the right side of his face, at the growing pink glow behind the mask he never takes off anvmore. <- He's so nice to the scouts bc he went thru it too. But younger. With higher expectations. And he doesn't quite get that not everyone has to deal w/ that. So he's just. Yeah. He mother hens them be he doesn't quite understand that many of them are the age he is now rather than the age he was. And they don't know he's their age physically. Like. Based on actual years he's like fuckin. He's like 5 or 6. And so basically that stress and emotional abandonment coupled with his experiences with the Curse and Belos leads to the Confrontation.

Palisman: His palisman is a jackalope named buck <333

On the topic of backstory n shit! I think that he’d have a frenemy relationship w/ Lorelei, in which she sees that he was also a victim but still resents him for her husband’s death, so its a very fragile relationship, mostly transactional in the beginning. Alas, she is a compassionate person, and over time they become…. Friends? Its an odd thing really. Also! Eda and Laz have a tentative friendship based on shitty curses and learning to deal with them. Laz helps protect the Owl House when he can, befriends Hooty (he finds Hooty So Interesting), and Eda takes the fall sometimes when Laz makes an oopsie. Also teaches him magic sometimes. ALSO. on the Eda x Laz thing, he’s around before Eda, but he ages slower and spends a lot of time regenerating after. Events. So yeah. He also ends up being the Fun Uncle of the HexSquad! Sad but funny thing is that Laz is so used to being called mean things that he hears Any Derogatory Term and his ears twitch like heh? Me? Poor guy. He does get a happy ending though! He is forever changed but he gets better.

Really wanna write smth for him at sm point -.- ANYWAY yeah that’s Laz!!! Sorry this is so long ahdgshdhddh. Here! Are some images (couldn’t find others i didnt feel like scrolling forever sorry <333)

[lightningandfireinmybones]

oof okay listen, i felt like in order to best understand the latest chapter I should go back and re-read ch.6 as well. i'm glad i did!

now I was originally going to comment my thots on ch.7 but as you will see it all got derailed so.. this is a love letter to my bad bitch Val Vel.

(i'll be back for Aemond cause bestie that last chapter was a huge one)

i'm adding a read more although since this is an ask idk if it will work <3

Her best friend, her most assertive protector, and she had been unforgivably absent to him for years. Running away from demons that were part of her.

yeah... ouch Val babe! And it's well established that she's not feeling that way only about Grey Ghost, or her brother, or even Aemond. It's her entire family, her complete support network that she feels like she has let down by leaving (in her mind abandoning) and now that she is back (let's not forget the circumstances of her return; under preassure from Daemon and emotional distress over Rhaenyra's health, after a life threatening situation which was half inability to care about herself and half ectively putting herself in danger) she still feels like she cannot "Do the Right thing" to not hurt her loved ones, not be a nuisance, not cause them any more grief.

the other parts of her, the ones she’d let down repeatedly.

and that's the fucking worst! if she were self assured she might have been able- better eqiupped- to handle all that stress and most importantly, find healthier ways to deal with her trauma and guilt. But now her tattered self confidence is just a mean companion. She can be self assured and make decisions for herself but she will be left in the wake of things feeling like she messed up, like she made a stupid choice (she often does). it will only feed her self hatred and fuel her self destructive/ self harming tendencies.

baby Val... ilysm. and i like to remind myself that val isnt just a person who happens to do drugs. Instead, she is struggling with substance abuse. She is experiencing the symptoms of her horrible mental state.

She’s not nearly numb enough, the lure of oblivion strong, but she pushes through. 

The walls are up, she’s unfortunately sober, and she wants to escape. She wants to stop feeling like an unwanted failure.

also there's something so interesting about the way she interacts with Dalton. i think i love it because there are no expectations there from either side. she can just call him, give no explanation, not bother with niceties and small talk and just "order" him to service her in some way and he does. i think her relationship with him is in its own way the most freeing one she has atm? the most open?

there is no emotional baggage, it's clear to them both what it is, and let's not act surprised, he is also enabling her in her Sad Slay Era. the open acess to drugs, to sex, to that exact type of physical only affection that is enough to drown out everything else while simultaneously look nothing like the deeper, emotional bond and (im never beating the romantic accusations) love they shared with Aemond.

Dalton is cool, a fine mist, a spring day with a bit of heat. He is easy, a Sunday morning in, all easy confidence and cocky smiles.

Dalton is uncomplicated and looks, acts, talks, exists completely unlike Aemond. ofc she's calling him up.

[...] Each brush of his tongue, each nip of his teeth is pleasant, but not exhilarating.

bet. i love how every thing she does to dalton is somehow mirrored in a reverse order in her memories. like she does to him what was done to her. as a way to return to those moments safely while not being in the physical position to be reminded of aemond? since they were opposites maybe the way to distance herself from what she felt with him is to act like him? idk idk... there's sth too important hapenning here and im too dumb to put it into words but bestie you slayed!

The flashbacks Val has are devastating and i hate you for them!

“You don’t give me orders,” Aemond growls, slamming her back into the wall. “I am in control here, Valaena. Never forget that.”

which is ofc followed by a "show of dominance" from Val. baby girl... intrusive thoughts are H A R D to deal with.

Maybe Im talking out of my ass but!

in her past Aemond had been controlling and assertive and dominant and whichever other synonym we can use BUT it was in a way that she explicitly enjoyed. It was a known, well established thing between them and was safe for her to explore with him.

I feel like once you drop the chapter where we see precicely what happened between them it will all make sense and just click together so nicely.

because im getting the vibes (i may be way off here) that the issue was that due to their shared trauma and childhood together, and since they clearly loved each other, as well as being each other's first AND a family member on top of that AND a safe haven from everything going on in their lives AND SINCE Val was well aware of Aemond's struggles what with his father and whatnot, she -at some point- / -probably due to aemond pushing too hard- started feeling a tad unsafe by this. or even better, insecure.

let's go with Insecure actually. because i feel like at some point the balance they had established, how they were equals in their relationship kinda shifted in a way? maybe she felt like her choice was being taken away ? (especially if aemond does end up pushing about free sex and tries to explore his breeding kink). Poor Val is scared of pregnancies and also they are extremely young!

so perhaps she made herself feel guilty for not being able to cater to precicely every need aemond had, especially when it felt good to do so, when it was pleasurable for her and worked as a bonding thing for them. that and the fact that it probably was legitimately sth that she did not fully vibe with at her age, it made her feel guilty and bad for not being able to set that boundary since to an extent it probably felt like a betrayal to Aemond??

and to actually leave him? go away for years? while knowing that she loves him and wants to be with him except for something that we dont yet know having happened between them. it was an extreme choice maybe? we have yet to find out. But whatever it may be it was definitely a hard decision and definitely cost her a lot but seemed as the best choice at the time.

but now she has to deal with the hurt and damage that choice left her with and bestie she's not doing okay!

“I think I like this assertive side of you,”

and val immediately thinks of her "sin" against aemond. how in the past this assertiveness has backfired and was used by her to betray and hurt him and in her words "fuck him over"

Baby you are unwell! it's okay. take deep breaths!

[...] like no more than an errant task to check off his to-do list. He said he’d always want her, but who would want her, the way she was?  Always telling her what she wanted to hear.

yes yes.. I'm a burden. I'm a bad person. Nobody loves me. They are only lying to placate me.

OOOOOFFFFFF. hard to return from that imma tell you that much

“Is this what you want, Valaena? You want me to control everything, down to the air you’re breathing?” Aemond whispers, searching her face. “Yes,” she chokes out, the word hanging in the air between them like a curse or a vow.

no i am normal about this. my felling are quite "meh" about those lines i dont understand what you're talking about. coudn't care less if i tried honestly.

curse or vow. Quite the choice of words. Quite the contradicting meanings. it's almost like someone who say it both ways and felt strongly about both those words would have a bad time trying to rationalise it in their mind and deal with the emotional side of it.

(I HATE YOU BESTIE WHY MUST YOU BE AN AUTHOR WHO USES WORDS THAT MAKE ME F E E L T H I N G S!!!)

[...] he’d no doubt leave her after realizing she wasn’t coming back. 

Hm... are thoughts of abandonment something you deal with regularly miss?

also aemond looked hot on the stairs.. no smartsy comment. just that he looked hot. thank you for your service ma'am

Shame, a different kind than had diffused her this morning, warms her cheeks. Criston had called ahead while she’d been waiting in the car. Now her brother could be disappointed in her too. 

i am mentally well. i am again normal about this.

[...] You’re a fucking disaster, Valaena.” “You think I don’t know that?” She says indignantly. 

“You think I don’t know that?”

Dread surges through her. She can imagine it: her mother’s contrived tears, Daemon’s white knuckled grip, the disappointment on both of their faces. She can see a news headline, something about the party princess, another round of infamy for their family.

“Don’t tell them.” [...] The humiliation she brings on herself never stops. 

she needs help yes. when you're feeling this badly about yourself that you see yourself as a disaster, a sidappointment, someone who only hurts, harms, lets down, puts in danger their loved ones, when you feel like it cannot possibly get any better it can't stop (and usually one feels that way about themselves way before anyone else notices) hearing someone out of concern say it aloud, put it into words, call you out on it feels only as a confirmation of what you already knew.

yes dread, yes humiliation. now that they see her as she truly is surely they will hate her as much as she hates herself and since she is solely a burden they will let her go.

Val my most beloved! <3 <3 <3

A sunny smile on her face, Valaena ends the Facetime, throws her phone on the counter, and proceeds with her skincare routine, finally satisfied.

Finally satisfied, after taking back control. ilhsm! perfect way to end this chapter bestie, truly as always a work of art!!

bestie this is such a thorough analysis i honestly cannot being to express my gratitude that you spent this kind of time on my brain rot bc you are SHOWING OFF THAT GRAD SCHOOL MIND, thesis level work thank u

this chapter was really supposed to send valaena to rock bottom and have a series of painful realizations,,, can't fix what you don't want to admit is broken:')

and yes dalton and valaena are written that way because dalton is both enabler and symptom relief, a little bit of a stress ball where valaena can work out her feelings with no expectations

and BESTIE i cannot wait for you to read the chapters of their last interactions, i have to know your thoughts on it when we get there lmaooo

and thank you bestie, i'll be honest, the curse or vow line was one i was v proud of so i'm glad it landed right lmfao, i like this idea of the heaven/hell, only two absolutes possible for aemond and valaena, and curse (a haunting, a loss, a feeling of fear) or vow (a promise, a light, a reason to be) is what they could be to each other, in every situation

this chapter was brought to you by the soul-crushing song "the archer" by taylor swift, where we get to explore terrifying self-hatred and doubt, applied liberally to our girl valaena

valaena is not easy to satisfy, double entendre intended, so i wanted to give her at least one win this chapter lmfao

but pls thank you for this!!! these anaylsis and long comments are honestly so meaningful and motivations, they make me feel like a real author:')v v grateful, thank you bestie

SALIVATING for your thoughts on the aemond chapter omg i could read your analysis on anything

[devilsgatewayhq]

Name: Penelope Beaumont Age: 48 Time living in Tonopah: Native who moved away at 15, only recently returned Occupation: Owner of Sunset Valley Bed & Breakfast Gang Affiliation: None Neighborhood: Springate Crossings Face Claim: Nadine Velazquez

Biography (TW: Child death, cancer, religious trauma):

Penelope wasn't the first child born into the Valdez family. She had had an older brother, one whom she'd never met before because he died at the age of two when he accidentally drowned in a pool while unattended. The loss devastated Rodrigo and Luisa; they were convinced that God was punishing them. It took many years of repenting and pious observation within the local church before they would try again, not wanting to risk His wrath. When their daughter came into their lives, they were determined to see her grow to adulthood in adherence to God's plan, even if it meant controlling her every move and watching her like a hawk. Unfortunately for them, the young girl was spirited and adventurous. She was never satisfied with the simple, devout life her parents wanted her to live, leading her to experiencing many a childhood and teenage joy behind their backs with her closest friend. This became especially true after her parents met him and they reacted poorly, citing their religious beliefs for why they didn't want her to spend time around 'that boy' for fear she'd be condemned along with him. Penelope never believed that, though. How could she when he was one of the kindest and most welcoming people she'd ever met? As the pair grew closer and feelings began to develop, they inevitably began to explore with one another, which resulted in an unexpected pregnancy at 15. Penelope's parents were incensed. With very little understanding or empathy on their parts -- after all, how was she expected to know better when they had never had the sex talk with her? -- they uprooted their lives in Tonopah Valley and moved as far away as possible, landing in the suburbs of New York City. Although they supported her throughout her pregnancy financially and put a roof over her head, the emotional toll their constant berating and religious guilt took on Penelope led her to the decision to go no contact as soon as she was old enough to get out from under them, changing her last name in the process. She decided she would rather raise her daughter on her own than to be subject to their condemnation. It was never easy, but the modest life she had built for the two of them was more than enough for her. She ensured Mikayla got everything she could ever need to grow into a well-rounded adult by sacrificing meals when there was only enough food for one, losing sleep to fulfill class assignments at the local community college to get her associates degree, and working herself to the bone by taking on three separate jobs to make ends meet. It wasn't until she collapsed at work one day that she even realized the fatigue and weight loss she'd been experiencing weren't a result of her lifestyle. She was diagnosed with Hodgkin's Lymphoma at the age of 32. The voices of her parents infiltrated her mind, insisting this was because of the sinful life she'd led. The doctors assured her the survival rate for this form of cancer was higher than others, and she began treatment soon after, though she had no idea how she was going to pay for it. Mikayla began working to help supplement the loss of income from Penelope needing to take time off from her own, and somehow, they managed. After years of treatment and follow-up visits, Penelope was officially declared to be in remission. When they were sure the side effects of the chemotherapy wouldn't hinder her from functioning on her own, she insisted Mikayla go to college like she had always talked about as a child. With no real reason to stay in New York City, she's decided to make the move back to her hometown and finally invest in herself, and maybe even track down the man who had had such an impact on her life and didn't even know it.

Headcanons:

She has an associate's degree in Business Administration. She got this while taking night classes when Mikayla was younger.

She hasn't spoken to her parents since she was 18. They've attempted to reach out to her in various ways in an attempt to be a part of Mikayla's life, but she's refused to let them indoctrinate her daughter in the way they'd attempted to do with her.

When Penelope was diagnosed, she finally decided to look her ex up online to reach out to him on the off chance she didn't survive through treatments. She decided against reconnecting, though, so as not to complicate his life unnecessarily.

[girldigital]

Surprise surprise

Once again, I come here after a failed professional opportunity.

London hates quirky bitches damn!

Somehow though, I feel the most at peace now than I have in a long time. Maybe it's the fact that the process was carried out by someone that seems to genuinely have my best interest at heart.

I can't tell if he was flirting, maybe he was. Maybe I was. I don't know. Sometimes you just click with people better than others and I can tell he definitely was rooting for me. Yet again though, I let my childlike wonder and excitement get the best of me, how dreadful.

It is true that I am a ditzy mess though, so it's not like I can blame these employers. The calibre of work is higher out here and I haven't had a real job in like 5 years so I guess that can show through quite blatantly to the experienced eye...

Anyway, I applied for another Film Archiving job. Were I to be reached out, I'm glad I got a bit of a trial run. Even though I was a mess on the phone call announcing my rejection, I did receive some pretty sound advice and I think that could help me snag my next gig. Especially if this notable company valued my skills and experience enough to see me as a top contender. Maybe this is all playing out the way it was supposed to, you know? Then again, I only applied. So far, no response, so I'm trying not to get too wrapped up once again.

I'm honestly grateful this all went down the way it did. I obviously wish I got the job, but I feel a lot happier now for some reason. I've never been rejected with so much care, and I guess you could say I'm desperate for that above all at the moment...

Anyway, as I was saying. I think I was juggling too much at once and now everything seems to have settled. My anxiety was through the roof and my binge eating followed suit. It felt like I was in Majora's Mask, with everyday getting closer to doomsday. Yet, now that I've embraced that no matter what happens, I'll be okay, I can finally breathe. I'm employed, surrounded by love, and have loads to do and discover still.

When it comes to love, that ball of stress evolved into a ball of warmth, only to get turned to ice once more.

I think Aiden and I knew from the moment we spent that day together that this felt more like friendship than anything else. I was certain of it anyway. Then, I lost track of reality, and I thought maybe seeing him in the flesh would snap me back. Unfortunately, it did, but not the way I had hoped. Of course, it was nice to see him, but I did not leave feeling very good.

For some demonic reason, seeing him again awoke something in me which wasn't there the first time. Someone I was so ready to call a friend, suddenly had me completely smitten - giggling and longing for his touch. I was lingering in the gazes we exchanged, stretching them for as long as I can. Feeling fire every time our flesh touched.

I say I want friendship, but these are not things I should be feeling towards a friend. Of course, we also got the friend side on track - catching up, joking around, enjoying music together. That should be enough for me to maintain this, but I just can't sacrifice how I feel for the sake of a friendship again. I've been there so many times and all I do is hurt myself in the process.

I cried a lot yesterday. I was PMSing yes, but I think for the first time I have the clarity of mind to see things as they are happening.

Here's what I told Mira yesterday, which I hadn't even thought about prior, but made so much sense the moment I externalized it:

"only thing i enjoyed was catching up w him and the few times the music was good but i didnt feel like the vibe was there w friends and i think this might not be good for me in the longrun

its giving me ali flashbacks where its like nice to be friends but deep down ill want something and i just keep riding bc i like the validation and it is a genuine good time bc were so similar but then its like im a friend faller and the closer i get the more attached i get and if its clear this is just to be friendship and i say so ik theres always gna be some hope in there which also stops me from actually giving time and attention to someone who would actually reciprocate it"

I can't believe the sudden moments of clarity I get sometimes lol

I cried monologuing in bed, imagining myself opening up and saying these things to someone I've only met twice... I guess you can call that mental illness!

But it's just a symptom of a greater issue...I am desperate. I do crave love and affection, and unfortunately, I tend to cling on to those who withhold it from me. I don't know if it's because I like the challenge, or if it's because I'm deeply unlucky to fall for those few who don't want me. Perhaps a mix of both (also again mental illness). He said he wanted a femcel well woo boy did he get his hands on one...

I will say it is disheartening to always be denied by those who have seen me at my most truthful. I know I shouldn't be playing an act to be loved, but when I don't they all walk away.

Not sure which way to go anymore.

I'll hang out with him again, probably on Friday and go from there. Deep down though, I know I might need to put that friendship on hold until I am less fragile/invested.

I've already wasted too much time operating on the basis of hoping for more.

[k-dokja]

summary: johan :) angst :) because :) i :) did :) this :) to :) myself

settings: established relationship + gender is not-specified for reader.

author's note: this was supposed to be a wholesome hair-drying scenario then my brain was like but maybe, no?

machine-generated winds blow at the side of your ears while johan dries your hair. his fingers tangle up in your hair and shake the residual water from the strands. you sit in front of him, mindlessly browsing another site for part-time jobs. it's not easy to find a stable one these days, not at your age.

most of what you can apply to do are the ones which take at most a day or two, but even then, your success runs low since people often prefer older and more experienced candidates.

you have run to a dead end.

your sigh is drowned by the sound of the blowdryer, but there is no mistaking how your shoulder slackens. you are quick to correct that, but johan has already noticed. the blowdryer quiets. he shakes his hand free of your hair.

'can't find anything again?' he leans over to peek at your phone, but it is unnecessary. a simple shrug from you and the answer is clear. no luck today. johan sighs in frustration on your behalf. he takes the phone from you, scrolling back up and down the site. 'why don't i try to get you a job in the white tiger? maybe you can take a secretary role...'

he frowns, 'but that's no good, the director is a huge pervert...' johan purses his lips in contemplation, 'some of the forces are ex-convicts and thugs, too, you shouldn't be running freely around them.'

it's hypocritical. johan is a thug, too. one of his circumstance's creations, but he has a reason for it and maybe the others do too. but you understand his stance, not everyone has a heart. even the ones with good intentions can turn on you if the situation requires for it, you should know that better than anyone.

you pull up your knees to your chest, waiting for him to hash out a plan. but unfortunately, he falls flat, 'you might be able to continue helping the aunties in the area with their chores and stores but... we can't keep banking on their kindness,' he sighs, putting the phone down on the floor. 'maybe you can stay home for a while...? my salary from the centre is enough to cover the both of us for the moment.'

it is understandable where hesitation comes from. you shake your head, shooting down his idea immediately. more than anyone, you know he means well. but well meanings won't always keep the two of you warm and fed. 'i should work,' you say, 'i can't rely on you all the time.'

'why not?' he bristles, 'better than you going out and something happens.'

you know this is not only about that. yes, johan is more than overprotective, but he is also someone that won't be honest about his feelings. even if he hides it, you can see his insecurity about his bad eye rearing its ugly head. he fears the day he can no longer be the one to shield you.

the only way you can answer this is by action over words, because in moments like these, he won't hear anything. but his feelings remain, and you know how to make the good overwhelm the bad. you lean over and cradle his face into your hand. your kisses are light and easy. you touch his nose then his forehead, and his lips are the final destination.

johan is no longer taut with tension, but he remains guarded anyway. 'you can't just gloss over my words like that,' he argues but there is no strength in his voice.

'i want to help,' you say simply, 'i've always wanted to help, that has never changed, no matter what.'

he puts his hands over yours. when you thought he'd pry them from him, he instead keeps them closer. 'but everything else has,' he says and you glance at his overgrown bang unconsciously, 'see? you think about it, too.'

'i've worked since even before your eye got bad, johan,' you kiss his nose again, 'that hasn't changed.'

finally, after five minutes that stretch longer than years, johan resigns to your explanation. he runs a hand through his hair, briefly revealing his greying eye. '...all right,' he says, 'let me try to ask around then, why don't you try to check out other sites?'

you smile, kissing him again on the lips. it has him smiling, too, even if it's only a pale imitation of yours. after fetching your phone, you turn your back to him again, letting johan shake your hair free of the dampness once more. the noises of the blowdryer fill the room again, but somehow, you don't think it has managed to drown out all of the negative thoughts.

yet all you can do now is hoping it'd get better.

[ashintheairlikesnow]

I would love to see Jake in therapy! Especially as a victim of abuse himself, being hurt by people who this time genuinely don't know better or don't mean to hurt him must be very triggering. He can't react with anger and he won't let himself feel it because he prioritises them.

CW: Discussion of childhood abuse, domestic violence, brief religious talk and a VERY extended wildfire metaphor, I'm so sorry

Takes place after The Same Bed Arc

-

"You know what I hate the most about my job?"

The question pops out of him seemingly without his consent. Jake finds himself confused as he hears his own voice, feels his own mouth moving to form the words. But once he starts, he can't quite stop.

Dr. Berger's eyebrows raise, slightly, looking up from the calendar she's carefully making coded notations in. They've been scheduling out the next three months of clandestine appointments for the runaways, fitting them in here or there around her schedule, when she can find her way to safe places where no one will be tracked. "Jake?"

He rakes a hand back through his hair, stubbornly refusing to refer to it as his good hand, because then he'd have to admit that he still hasn't got the grip strength he used to have on the other one. How long can he hide the tingling nerves, the way sometimes his fingers feel numb? How long can he disguise having to shift to using one arm instead of both?

How long can he keep-

"The goddamn lying. That's what I hate the most."

Dr. Berger doesn't visibly react, really. Her gaze shifts briefly to one side, checking that the door to her office is closed, then back to his face. "It is an unfortunate necessity in what we do," She says, voice low, warm and empathetic. "But I can see how it would be exhausting, even when you're experienced in this line of work.”

"It’s not even because of work, that's what I fucking hate." Jake sits back, running his hand over his face. He's so tired. He's staying awake too much, watching Kauri sleep, the bruises around his neck finally fading. He's clingy, Kauri, holding onto Jake all night and waking up the second he gets out of bed for a drink or to visit the bathroom. And if he's not holding onto Jake, he's clinging to Antoni instead. Antoni, who only shakes his head when Jake asks if he needs some space, and refuses to be separated from Kauri whatsoever, even when it's clearly costing him. He just keeps staying there, watching and waiting for another attack that they know isn't coming - the one who wants to hurt Kauri is gone, as gone as you can get - but neither of them can stop waiting for it, anyway.

Kauri is back to his old way of saying I know it's stupid, but can you tell me you love me? with a brittle, false sparkling brilliance that will shatter like glass if anyone hesitates a second too long before they respond.

It's too familiar. It hurts too much.

“I hate that I started lying when I was four and I’ve never stopped.” There. The words are out, and there’s a relief alongside the tightness in his throat, that eternal drumbeat of shame that he’s never been able to shake. All the audiobooks he’s played in his car, the well-meaning therapy shit on the internet, none of it ever made him able to shake the shame. Not all the way. Not completely. 

“You’ve mentioned your difficulties as a child before.” 

He looks at her, blinking. She’s sitting back, too, hands folded in her lap. The perfect representation of calm professionalism, even in her weekend sweats and short ponytail, meeting him after an hour at her hot yoga class. Which she claims is miserable but ‘exhilarating’, which to Jake mostly just seems like ‘miserable, but too expensive not to pretend to like’.

“You’re treating me like a patient,” He says, and there’s humor in his voice that he doesn’t really feel. It’s not a statement, honestly, it’s more of a question, if one he already knows the answer to.

She nods, mostly just tipping her chin slightly down, head to the side. “You seem like you need someone to talk to, lately,” She says, and there’s no hint of annoyance or irritation in voice or face. Only her empathy, which he’s seen turned on so many of the runaways over the years, now aimed right at him. “But I’ve been thinking that you seem like you need someone to talk to lately more or less since you were twenty-three years old.”

“Christ, has it been that long?” He groans. “God, it has. I’m getting old.”

“You’re not even thirty-five, Jake.” She smiles wide enough for him to catch the dimple on one side. “But I know the feeling. I felt old at your age, too. And then somehow I kept getting older without actually feeling any wiser."

“Funny how that happens. I’m all right, Andrea, I really am, but I just… you know, it never stops. And that’s what I wanted, I knew from the first month I worked for Nat I didn’t want to do anything else with my life, but with… with what happened to Kauri… I’m wondering if I’m even strong enough to do this forever.”

“Very few people are,” Dr. Berger says gently. “That’s nothing to feel upset or ashamed of.”

“Nat never stopped.” 

“Nat’s quite the exception to the rule.” Dr. Berger exhales without quite opening her mouth all the way, looking towards the window in her office, the tree outside. Her fingers tap idly along the top of one thigh. “But even she is only taking on one person right now-”

“Two, if you count Vince.”

Dr. Berger’s lip twitches in another slight smile. “Fine. Two. But my point is that Nat is a very driven person, yes, but even she needed to step back for a while. It’s not a problem to become worn down by the work you do. And lying is difficult, even lying for survival. Our minds dislike dishonesty, even our own. You can’t make a baseline of success based on someone else’s career path, because you are not Natalie Yoder.”

“God, no. I’m sure not. I wouldn’t ever have worked for WRU, for one thing.”

Dr. Berger is quiet for a beat, and then asks softly, “Do you resent her?”

“I did, for a while after I found out. After I found out she’d lied to us for so long, when I had-... when I hadn’t lied to her, you know-... but she had lied to us. And then they showed me that photo of her…  Yeah, I was angry for a while.”

“Because of the lying?”

“Because of the lying to me.” He shakes his head. Somehow it’s found its way into his hands, palms pressed to his temples over his eyebrows. The office is a little over-warm - she keeps the thermostat higher on the weekends so the air won’t run as hard. The wildfires have finally come under control, but the smoke travels and the sun outside seems weaker, a little orange, even in the middle of the day. But still, the smell in the air keeps Jake on edge. 

Like he can’t quite shake the way the air smelled when he was racing his car towards Vince’s house, following Keira’s directions and praying he wouldn’t be too late.

And he almost was.

Staring at Kauri in Antoni’s arms, the weeping and the tears. The blood, only realizing once he had them both in his own arms that the blood wasn't Kauri's, but Owen's.

Realizing only when Vince and Nat were headed for the bathroom that Vince had been the one to wield the knife.

He'd already been thinking about the lies they would tell to explain Owen’s death, even before he could bring back home the person he loves most on earth. It’s always been about the lies they’ll use to save themselves, it’s always been about the lies he’ll tell to protect his family.

“Is it-... Jake, this is a delicate question, but is it because it reminds you of your-”

“Dad?” He cuts her off. Somehow it feels safer to be the one to say it out loud. He looks up to see her throat move as she swallows, to take in the plain, worn blue of her sweatshirt. She has little wrinkles around her eyes like Nat does, and did she have any of them when he first met her, or has that just come with the time, the years that have passed while they worked to help frightened, hurting people heal? 

She nods.

“Yeah.” He laughs, airy and bitter and humorless. “It does remind me of him, definitely. Of telling people at church that I fell out of a tree instead of that my dad grabbed me hard enough to dislocate my shoulder, and then sitting through a stupid fucking Sunday School lecture about the ‘importance of honesty’ and God knowing when we lie. Of my mother laughing with my grandparents about being so dang clumsy when every single person at the Thanksgiving table giving thanks for our good fortune knew he’d punched her. Of telling myself that I wasn’t angry she didn’t leave even though I was punching the wall until my hands bled when I thought about having to keep living in that house with him. Seven year old kids shouldn’t be angry enough to do that!“

She doesn’t say anything, but at least she doesn’t have her notebook out. It feels less like real therapy if she doesn’t have her notebook, if she’s just listening. It makes it easier to keep talking, knowing that the words simply dissolve into the air after he says them, and there’s no one keeping a record of his confessions.

“I feel like I’m always angrier than the people hurt worse than I was,” Jake whispers. His eyes burn, and he’s surprised to feel tears welling when he blinks, even more shocked when one rolls, warm and and then suddenly cold, down his face. His heart twists, chilled and burning inside his chest. “I was always angrier than my mom, I’m angrier about Owen Grant than Kauri is. I’m always fighting off my anger while they’re coming up with reasons it happened, and they’re not even reasons, they’re-... they’re… God, I don’t know what. No, I do, I do. They’re excuses. Justifications. Even Kauri, even Kauri sometimes talks about how Owen Grant was lonely, like it fucking matters. They get hurt anyway, those assholes hurt them, Owen tried to kill them, and I’m supposed to, what, just… make it better, but not admit what was wrong in the first place?"

He groans, a sound that seems like it wells up against his will, comes pouring out of somewhere deep inside him that has been coiled and tense and twisted for his entire life. Water rushing through a canyon after the bursting of a dam.

“I just feel like… like I can’t get away from lying. I wanted to help people but I’m doing the same shit I’ve always done. And I can’t ever seem to stop it before it happens. Just... pick up the pieces."

“You feel like you are drawn to people who have been subjected to intense abuse because of your early years, and that it’s become a cycle of telling lies to protect them while perhaps not feeling like you are fully succeeding.” She rephrases it so succinctly, so perfectly, and, well… there’s a reason she’s the therapist and he’s just some guy who keeps the door open for hurting people to come in out of the cold.

“Yeah.”

“Do you think you’ve been having a resurgence of this anger because of what happened with Kauri? It’s very understandable-”

“Not just him. I mean, yeah, that didn’t help, but…” He rubs at his left hand with his right. His fingertips spark and tingle, like his hands gone to sleep, only sometimes it doesn’t stop for hours at a time. He can’t really feel the pressure of his right hand through the nerves in his left, and like always, a part of him is cold with fear at what that means. “Ever since… ever since I was stabbed, really.”

“Since Jameson stabbed you.” She says it without blame or recrimination towards Jameson, simply names the events for what they are.

It helps.

God, it helps to hear someone else say it.

“Yeah, since, since then. Since Jameson stabbed me. Mostly because… there’s some kind of thing wrong with my arm, my hand, ever since. And I’m… I’m not telling them about it.”

“You’re lying to them about your injuries that came as a result of someone else’s loss of control over their actions, and this feels like your childhood with your father?”

“... it’s not-... my dad could have controlled it. My dad knew what he was doing, he wanted to hurt me, to hurt my mom. It’s not really the same. Jameson didn’t even know who I was. He has these flashbacks, worse than anyone else I’ve ever worked with, where he can be-... violent. Nat says it’s mostly under control, now, with his medication. He still has them occasionally, but now that he’s not in the house with someone who reminds him of the guy who hurt him, or one of them. Which… apparently I do. Remind him of one of those bastards, which, doesn't that feel great to hear."

Another bitter laugh.

“I mean, people always told me I was just like my dad-... that I looked just like him, I mean. Shit. Well, that’s a goddamn Freudian slip, huh?”

She pauses. “It does seem to suggest you have a certain amount of concern over repeating the cycle of abuse within your own relationships, yes. We can talk about that, but I want to stay with the worry you came in here carrying. It’s a heavy weight, Jake. A lifetime of practicing deception would be difficult for anyone, no matter their inner strength. Let me say that I do wonder if there isn’t an element of this injury weighing even more heavily on you because you are lying to the people you are usually lying for.”

That hits. 

That hits hard.

He rubs at the skin between thumb and forefinger, pinching it as hard as he can. He barely feels it. “... probably. That’s probably true. But everyone is hurting, and they need me to be the strong one, you know?”

She pauses. Considers his words. “Do they, Jake?”

He’s so tired.

Jake wonders, idly, how many times he thinks about how tired he is, each and every day. How much of his life has been spent thinking those exact words, if you added together every single second?

“I think they do. I have to be in control, I have to be the one who doesn’t get torn apart, because they already have been. They need someone to always be the, the rock, you know? ‘The wise man builds his house upon the rock’, you ever heard that song?”

“Can’t say I have.”

“Oh. It’s a church song, for kids. ‘The wise man builds his house upon the rock,’” Jake manages a slight tuneless singing, then lets it fade, an embarrassed flush marking his cheeks. “I have to be the rock.”

A bird sings outside the window, chirping happily, and Jake turns to look. Through the slits of the oversized wooden blinds, he can see it sitting at a bird feeder, happily dipping its beak to pick up seeds while a jealous squirrel chitters from a tree branch nearby. 

“I would perhaps note that there are other places to build a house than on a solid, unmoving rock.” Dr. Berger doesn’t sound mocking, or like she’s being humorous or even lightly making fun of his thoughts. She follows him down the confusing trail of his conversation, and leads him back to the main path, the larger one where he can sort of see the next marker telling him where to turn. “Rock subjected to water will eventually crumble and wear away. It can shatter under pressure, you know. And it can be hard work to build a long-lasting foundation when you have to break into the stone to do it.”

“They built skyscrapers in New York by drilling into the bedrock,” Jake counters.

Dr. Berger smiles. “But skyscrapers must be built with flexibility, Jake. They sway, they shift, they move with the wind and the ground beneath them. Otherwise… well. Otherwise, they would just fall with the pressure caused by ordinary wind. The foundation is important, but so are the components used to create the structure itself.”

“I… can’t think of any other building metaphors to argue with,” Jake admits after a pause, and she laughs, warmly, and then he does, too. Some of the tightly coiled anxiety inside of him relents, just a little, and the anger goes with it. “In any case, the idea of the song is from a Bible verse. Uh, ‘everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house. Yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock.’”

“I have seen houses pulled off the rock they were built on into flooded rivers,” Dr. Berger says softly, “And pulled apart by the water, left as just some wood and nails, Jake. I've seen videos of tornadoes picking a house up and turning it to puzzle pieces in seconds, no matter what it was built on. And anyone who had built a house on a rock without a basement would have been lifted up with it."

“Well, the idea isn’t exactly-... Jesus didn’t get to watch youtube videos. And I doubt He had much experience with tornadoes."

“No, He didn’t. When did you last read the Bible, Jake?”

“I don’t know. Long time ago. Don’t even own one any longer. Nat does, I think.” He rubs a hand over his face again. Maybe when he goes home he’ll lay down and ask if Kauri wants to nap with him. 

“But you still had that bit about the rock, what, memorized?”

“Yeah. Turns out when you win the stupid Bible memorization quiz competition four years in a row, that shit sticks with you.”

“I can see that.” She hesitates, and then picks up the pen she’d been using to make the appointments for the runaways. She taps it lightly on her desk, over the oversized calendar she uses, that takes up most of the space in front of her. “Jake, you have spent a lot of years letting anger build up inside of you because you are afraid to express it. You’ve said as much, that you fear your resemblance to your father becoming more than simply physical. And mentioning this incident with Jameson, I think… to return to our incredibly tortured metaphor, I think… I think that that incident has been like increased wind, or pressure, and you are not able to shift or sway to hold yourself together, not forever. And Owen Grant’s attack on Kauri and Vince has increased that wind speed even more. You can’t keep going like this forever.”

“Probably not. But I can't stop, either. Who else can keep going, if I can’t? You know? If I don’t take care of everything, who’s going to?”

“They are. Kauri, Antoni, Chris. Everyone in your house. They adore you, Jake, and they are capable and probably more than happy to help you. But you have to be able to ask for and receive help in order for them to provide it.”

“Right. And how do I do that, exactly, when Kauri still looks like the attempted murder victim he is, Antoni won’t leave his side, and Chris has been calling himself names again since he saw them written on the wall at Laken’s? I mean, how do I ask for help from people who need help way more than I do?”

“It’s not a competition-”

“Sometimes it feels like it is.”

“I understand. Jake, I think you should start coming to see me. There’s a lot inside of you that you’ve been pushing down to help people. Providing that help is admirable, but if you keep going without slowing down or taking a breath, you’re going to collapse. I want you to have someone to talk to.”

“You?”

“Yes.” Dr. Berger smiles. “Me. I don’t mind. I’m actually easing out of taking regular patients, it’ll be time to retire for me soon, anyway. I have an opening on Thursday mornings. Would you like to start coming in at, say 9:30 in the morning? Each Thursday?”

Jake swallows, nods, then stops himself. “What do I tell the others I’m doing?”

“Jake.” Dr. Berger sighs, but her smile is still there. “You tell them exactly the truth. You’re going to therapy, too. Just like they do. You don’t lie to them about this, and we’re going to talk about how to stop lying about other things, too. Your deception has been self-protective, and protective of others, for so long that it’s become a survival mechanism. But you don’t need to protect yourself that way, not from your loved ones, not any longer.”

“It feels like it. It feels like I do.”

“Which is why I want to see you next Thursday, at 9:30 in the morning, coffee in hand.” She smiles. “Deal?”

He breathes out. His phone buzzes, and he glances down at it to see a message from Kauri. Three pizza emojis, question mark. If Kauri’s using emojis, today isn’t going well. 

If Antoni is happy with Kauri asking him to order pizzas instead of offering to cook, today is really not going well. 

Jesus, he’s so goddamn exhausted. He takes a deep breath and squares his shoulders.

“Deal,” He says, a little heavily. “Thursday, 9:30. Coffee in hand. Until then…”

“Until then, remind yourself that you’re allowed your anger. And they’re allowed to know about it, so that you can have fully honest expressions of your feelings with each other. Communication is key to a relationship, and I guarantee-... Jake, I guarantee that Antoni and Kauri are angry, too, about what’s happened. And that both of them are probably as frightened of expressing it as you are, if for different reasons. You have to talk to each other, and that means you, too.”

“... shit.”

Her smile widens slightly, wryly. “What? Hit the nail on the head?”

“Maybe a little bit. I guess there’s a reason you’re the therapist and not me.”

“I’m the therapist because what you and Nat do takes an amount of dedication and emotional strength that I don’t believe I am capable of. I admire the two of you immensely, Jake. You’ve no idea how much. But you both still need someone to help you, and I would love to be that person."

He feels his face burn hotter and looks away, huffing a little. “Right.”

“I’m quite serious. But just… think about what I said, okay? And we’ll start meeting professionally next week.”

“Got it. I think I need… I’m going to head home.” He pushes himself to his feet, and they say their goodbyes with Jake thinking it over, preoccupied as he walks out, hears the click of the door’s automatic lock behind him as he steps into the yellowish light. The scent of wildfire smoke sets his shoulders a little higher towards his chin, tenses his muscles.

The edge of the horizon, on one side, is still a little bit dark and orange.

The wildfires are under control, the news anchors say, but they’re still burning. The tragedy has already happened, there’s no prevention any longer, only recovery. Only trying to head it off before it gets any worse.

The trees are already stumps and ash, the wild animals have turned to blackened bone or escaped the inferno. Cars have wound their way down mountain roads burning on either side, vehicles packed to their roofs with whatever the people could take with them in the ten or twenty minutes they were given before they had to run, everything else left to be lost.

The bruises are already dark around Kauri’s throat and over his hips, his movements are already hesitant, his lips tremble when he wakes up, checking to be sure he isn't alone.

Jake has already been a little boy in the emergency room listening to his mother say his concussion is from falling on the pavement when it had been his father throwing him down, he’s already felt himself boil alive with rage he can’t let out. 

He's already been a teenager with a black eye on a bus in the middle of the night, told that it was a mistake that he was ever born by one of the two people who should have loved him unconditionally.

In what used to be the forests, dark charcoal marks are already cut so deeply into the earth that they’ll be visible for a long, long time. The smoke is already visible, in some spots, from space.

The damage is already done.

They can’t undo the fires.

They can only work, now, to encourage the green things to grow back up over the scars.

-

@burtlederp @finder-of-rings @endless-whump @astrobly @thefancydoughnut @newandfiguringitout @doveotions @pretty-face-breaker @gonna-feel-that-tomorrow @boxboysandotherwhump @oops-its-whump @cubeswhump @whump-tr0pes @downriver914 @whumptywhumpdump @whumpiary @orchidscript @nonsensical-whump @outofangband @eatyourdamnpears @hackles-up @grizzlie70 @mylifeisonthebookshelf @keeper-of-all-the-random-things

[redorich]

to those who carried on

A fic for @petrichormeraki​ and their Hermit!Tommy AU.

-------

The hermits know Tommy as a quiet young man who is very sad and contemplative. The more time they spend with him (against his will, but they know he needs the company) the more they learn of the little details. His favorite block is cobblestone, he likes building towers, and apparently his favorite woman is the Queen. They don’t ask why he wears a smiley mask even though he never seems happy. They don’t ask why he hides important things in his ender chest. They don’t ask why he wears a shattered compass on a chain about his neck.

(Once, he died in lava and lost his absolute mind. He was so upset about the compass that he didn’t even mention the stack and a half of diamond ore he had on him. Xisuma ended up manually rolling back the server just so Tommy could have it back.)

As time goes on, the tremors in Tommy's hands grow lesser. His dull blond hair seems a bit brighter, his bruises fade quicker, he doesn’t look quite so skinny-- he spends his time serenely building, resource gathering instead of running and fighting. He has a sense of humor under all that trauma, which the hermits unfortunately find out after another massive-scale prank war thought to be instigated by Grian actually turns out to be Tommy's fault.

Tommy starts swearing more. Doc gets the stink eye from Stress for this, but Doc insists he’s never once sworn around the young man. (That’s an absolute lie, but it wasn’t anything Tommy hadn’t heard before. Tommy thinks Doc is remarkably unoriginal in his cursing. He does take note of the German ones, though.)

Inviting Tommy to PvP minigames can be touchy, they learn. He likes to fight, but he fights like an animal with nothing to lose. Grian once chanted, “It stays in the pit!” and everyone present had to spend the next five minutes wrangling Tommy’s soul back into his body from wherever it’d floated off to.

Tommy likes to glide with his elytra. He claims he’s never had one before, but he flies like such a natural that a few people have their doubts. On a dark desert night, with dark blue eyes watching the night sky, he confides to Cub that it reminds him of the way his dad used to fly. He hates rockets, though. He does not confide to Cub that it reminds him of what his brother did to his best friend. He says enough that Cub can guess, though.

Scar gets fed up with Tommy’s creeper holes and makes Tommy help him fix them. At first, Tommy has no clue why Scar is breaking out things like coarse dirt and birch leaves and making the ground all fancy, but he’s not afraid of a little hard work and Scar makes it fun. He learns a lot about terraforming that day, and awkwardly comes back a few days later asking if Scar needs any more help terraforming. Tommy still hasn’t built a real base, not by Hermitcraft standards, but the small hill he’s built his dirt hut near now has a very beautiful, if amateurish, waterfall. He doesn’t tell Scar about this, but Scar finds out anyway. Tommy wakes up one morning to find that someone has left a shulker box in his house. Instead of iron-gripped paranoia, he just feels wonder that someone would give him a gift-- to the hermits, a single shulker box is nothing. To Tommy, it’s everything.

The shulker box contains coarse dirt, birch leaves, and a silk touch shovel.

Tommy helps Xisuma mine a giant hole in the ground near bedrock, because he realizes that he’s never thanked the admin for getting him his compass back. Well, that and the fact that instamining with a haste two beacon and an efficiency five pickaxe is a novelty. Xisuma lets him keep the cobble, since everyone knows it’s Tommy’s favorite block, but also insists he keep some of the other blocks like andesite and diorite. He pats Tommy on the head and tells him to talk to Bdubs about building a house some time. Tommy nods. He's taken aback by how tall Xisuma is, completely contrasting his mild nature. He reminds Tommy of Wilbur, on one of his good days before... Before. Not Ghostbur, though-- the admin is much too alive.

Tommy waits too long, so eventually Bdubs comes to him. The man is silly and outrageous, playing everything for laughs and unexpectedly tender. Bdubs plays up how beautiful he thinks Tommy’s hideous dirt shack is, then offers to help him build a house that’s better. For Tommy, building a house means settling down, accepting that this is his home now. Bdubs doesn’t know this. Tommy builds cobblestone dicks while Bdubs tries to lecture him about depth and block variation. Nothing gets done and Bdubs feels like he might have failed, but come next week Bdubs is flying over the area and sees the dicks are gone; so is the dirt house. In its place is a spruce-and-cobble cottage nestled near the tiny waterfall. Off to the side, he’s made a cozy doghouse for his fox, Theo. Bdubs doesn’t know how close that fox came to being named Fundy.

He spars with False, and she very pointedly does not mention how his stances are uniquely suited to a piglin. There’s only one renowned fighter who’s a piglin, after all. It's Tommy’s story to tell, if he ever does, why he’s seen enough of the legendary Technoblade’s fights to pick up on his stances, yet he’s not experienced enough to know that they don’t suit him. Instead, False gives him different stances suited more for tall, skinny people like the two of them. She’s got blond hair and blue eyes just like him. (Not that she’d know. She’s never seen his eyes, hidden behind his mask as they are.) Every now and then, he imagines her as an older sister, and the one time he says so, she smiles. When Tommy’s at home, looking at his own distorted reflection in his waterfall (he’s improved it since he built it), he muses that their eyes aren’t the same, their hair colors are subtly off. It’s close enough, he thinks.

Stress dies from fall damage and Tommy goes out of his way to pick up her stuff, because the hermits do these things out of the kindness of their hearts. The thought never even crosses their minds to steal. It crosses his mind. He doesn’t do it. Stealing from Stress would be like stealing from Niki.

He shows up at Cleo’s base unannounced and demands to see the “cool shit”. He is appropriately enthused by the giant armor-stand-bugs. She tries teaching him her armor stand magic, but it doesn’t really sink in. It’s okay, she assures him, most people don’t have the knack for it. He does, however, learn that buttons make excellent decorations. He also learns how to braid hair, bribed by ice cream. He is terrible at it, to the point where Joe has to come by to help the two untangle her hair so Tommy can start again. Watching the two bicker over capitalism and six million armor stands and a whole host of other inside jokes he doesn’t get, he thinks he’s starting to understand what friendship is supposed to be like. Joe and Cleo don’t see him clutching his compass. He and Tubbo weren’t too far off from this, given their circumstances. Maybe...

Maybe Tubbo can be forgiven.

Tommy makes minigames of his own, ones that don’t just kill you and steal your stuff. He builds things that are pretty instead of just functional, brews potions with Stress and only calls them drugs once (again, upsetting her is like upsetting Niki. Best not done), and sets up chicken bombs above people’s bases instead of just lavacasting them. (As Grian saw the hundreds of chickens slowly raining down upon his mansion, he got such a peculiar look on his face that Tommy feared he’d fucked up. The shorter, stronger (much stronger oh god why is he so strong despite being so small) man nearly crushed Tommy’s lungs in a hug, proclaiming how proud he was of Tommy. Tommy was proud of himself for not accidentally murdering Grian out of reflex. Was this what healing was like?)

Yes. It is what healing is like. Tommy knows this because that wound gets ripped open again. Tango shows him how to build the most obnoxious redstone-powered noise machine the two can think of. Tango digs a small pit, and asks Tommy to throw down his axe. Suddenly, Tommy’s in Logstedshire again; it’s not Tango asking, it’s Dream. His hands don’t shake when he tosses his axe into the pit, followed by his sword and his armor. It isn't until he’s placed the TNT down that Tango grabs his wrist and asks him what he’s doing. Tommy’s eyes clear enough that he can see past the blond hair and freckles. Tango isn’t green, he’s red. He's shorter than Dream, and his worried eyes are unhidden. Tommy shudders, then tells Tango everything.

Tango has no pity for Tommy, just understanding and sympathy. He doesn’t push Tommy to talk about it, but when Tommy’s done telling his story, Impulse and Zedaph show up. They all pretend that Tommy’s voice isn’t hoarse, that they all didn’t conveniently happen to look away when Tommy took off his mask just long enough to wipe his eyes. The men bake a cake together, fool around with honey blocks, and don’t talk about it.

Tommy knows very little about redstone, considers himself more of a builder and a fighter than an engineer. Still, Mumbo’s living base is inspiring, and Tommy often hangs around the man’s industrial district just to watch Mumbo work. Mumbo knows that Tommy hasn’t purchased a day pass, but it’s nice having someone around to talk to while he works. It’s not like Tommy is stealing anything. (Tommy totally steals from Mumbo’s industrial district storage system. The man’s farms are so efficient that he doesn’t even notice, so Tommy assumes it’s fine. What Mumbo doesn’t know won’t hurt him.)

Lava still isn’t his favorite thing in the world. He stays far away from it, instead of imagining what it would be like to hurtle towards it. Ren doesn’t really notice this, but he does notice that Tommy doesn’t seem to like his mustafarian base. On a spur-of-the-moment whim, Ren whips up some absurd plotline in which he is a lone weary traveller seeking refuge at Tommy’s base from strange alien overlords. The two have fun together, and the young man cracks more absurd jokes about it than the hermits have ever seen him do. When Ren leaves a week later to return to his own base, Tommy keeps being absurd, if a bit more subdued without someone to play off of. He builds a shrine to the “prime log”, which grows more elaborate each day. Beef and xB pretend to be his acolytes, despite having no clue what a “twitch prime” is.

They can’t see his face, but the smile in his voice is a far cry from the despondency he once wore like a heavy cloak. He is so much more animated and alive, full of motivation. He builds an entire island in three days, and hand-delivers an invitation to each and every hermit for his beach party. Everyone shows up, even those with packed schedules (Iskall) and those with introverted tendencies (Etho). Tommy is nearly moved to tears when they show up in groups of twos and threes, as though he hadn’t expected anyone to come. There aren’t enough chairs for everyone, but there is more than enough cake to go around. Tango brings drinks, Impulse brings meat to barbecue, and Zedaph makes an elaborate jump-powered grill. Keralis brings way too much confetti and several handfuls of cheap, obnoxious party noisemakers. Stress brings Tommy a crown made out of alliums. It shines far less than his brother’s gold crown, and it’ll die in a few days, but he wears it all night and keeps it in his ender chest until it withers away.

He spends five days teaching himself to make flower crowns. Even his best attempt is awful, nowhere near as pretty as the crowns Stress makes, but when he gives it to her, she takes off the one she was wearing and wears his until it falls apart.

He dies fighting a creeper on Grian’s behalf, and doesn’t even panic, because he trusts that however many times he dies, no matter how stupid or ignominious or revolutionary or important, Xisuma will always let him respawn.

He spends a grand total of nine diamonds to buy a single plot of land in the shopping district. He builds a cute little bench facing the sunset, with warmly glowing street lights on either side and a small garden. At the end of the bench he places a jukebox, and buys every single disc that Beef’s music shop sells, including Pigstep. He sits on the bench while Mellohi plays and watches the tiny silhouettes of his friends flying in the evening sky. Tommy looks alone on that bench, even if he seems happy, so sometimes other people stop by to sit with him. Scar declares the bench area a public park, since everyone likes it so much, and refunds Tommy his nine diamonds straight from the throne.

[comfortscripts]

Do Your Job, No Matter What ¬ Draco M.

Plot - Following your boss's orders was part of the job but you never realised how far he'd take it.

Genre - Smut ♧ {16+ Only}

Pairing - CEO!Draco Malfoy x Fem!reader

Notes/Warnings - Power play plot with porn, harsh names, Dom/Sub, penetrative, choking, unprotected sex with creampie (dont be stupid like them irl). Astoria is the ex-wife in this as I couldn't bring myself to write about a cheater and I apologise in advance if this is terrible, I haven't written smut in years.

Word Count - 2.3k

The day had bled into night and as the gentle rays of sun disappeared, so did your co-workers. Mutters of goodbyes and heels clacking faded till all that remained was the muffled sound of Mr. Malfoy on his conference call.

You were used to being the last one to leave, often deep into the night. A common requirement for a personal assistant was to be there till the boss leaves but unfortunately, Mr Malfoy wasn't exactly rushing home most nights.

The simple hardwood desk was more familiar to you than your own bed nowadays. Nights got later as business got busier and Mr Malfoy became more involved with potential investors, but you never complained. You were always the best and you were planning on staying that way.

"Y/N, get in here!"

Being so involved in the setup for the next morning, you didn't listen out for the conference call or how it ended but from thunderous and rude tone of your boss, you could imagine.

Shuffling to your feet before straightening out your skirt, you made hastily made your way through the large oak doors that housed the king, as you co-workers often joked. You understood their distaste, a powerful and attractive man was already intimidating but Draco always found a way to rub people up the wrong way, except you. You always had a certain affection towards the man, not that you would ever admit it.

Entering the darkened office, you felt your breath catch in your throat as you faced your boss. His once tamed hair, now wisps of silvery blond streaking across his forehead. Veins prominent on pale arms where he had rolled up his sleeves. He stood behind his desk, with one hand leaning on the dark oak table whilst the other nursed a crystal glass of whiskey. Even in his frustration, he still looked like the most powerful man in the country.

Draco lifted his eyes to yours and you felt yourself squirm under his gaze, you'd be lying to say that the man wasn't gracing the thoughts you had in your more intimate moments. This simple act made you think that this could be more than a fantasy with how his eyes traced over you.

"Well that meeting was a total disaster." The man sighed before manoeuvring to sit on what could almost be described as a leather throne. "I told my father that trying to work with Potter Industries was useless but the stupid git wouldn't listen so I had to deal with them bastards for nothing!"

Whilst you tried to focus on his words, your thoughts were more taken with his hands. Strong, thick fingers graced with three solid silver rings and the way they wrapped around the crystal tumbler was so sinful, you let yourself imagine what they would feel like around your neck.

Snapping yourself out of your sinful thoughts, you notice the silence as if Draco had expected a reply to his rant. Whilst he valued your opinion, you weren't sure what to offer.

"I'm sorry they wasted your time sir. Is there anything I can do?" Whilst it sounded innocent enough, part of you couldn’t help but mean it in a suggestive manner.

Draco debated your offer for a moment. He always knew what you thought of him, how your thighs would clench together during car rides where he was just slightly closer than normal or how you would blush at the simplest praise. You were wrapped around his finger.

He knew you wanted him sexually, he too held this secret but he wondered if you were harbouring more than sinful thoughts towards him. He needed to know, to see if he was just seeing what he wanted to see or if there was something between the two of you. Draco knew that by tonight, he would have his answer.

"Come over here" He beckoned.

Obeying before thought, you carefully manoeuvred so you were standing behind the desk and in front of your boss.

Mr Malfoy patted his right thigh in a non-verbal demand for her to sit on his lap. Once again, you were obeying before thought or reason, you gently placed yourself on his muscular thigh, allowing your skirt to ride up.

Draco rested his hand on your exposed thigh, toying with the edge of your tight skirt. With the other hand he gripped your chin in a gentle but firm manner, turning your face to meet his, only centimetres away.

"You know exactly how you can help me"

"I'm not sure what you mean Mr Malfoy"

"Don't play dumb my dear. I see how you look at me, how you respond to me. Would bet money on the fact that you are getting wetter by the second just from being this close to me." His hand inched up closer and if on instinct, your legs moved apart to allow him. The tips of his fingers graced the edge of your panties before pulling them to the side, allowing his fingers to feel your wetness. "Just as I thought, always knew you were my little slut".

He slowly pushed a digit inside, allowing the warmth to coat his pale finger. The action caused a small whimper to leave your lips involuntarily and as you felt the cold metal of his ring graze your folds, you could barely stop the moan from escaping. Draco kept a slow pace, almost teasingly slow. Your body was begging for more but Draco wanted to hear it, needed to hear it. He could see you getting restless at the gentle pace but he needed more from you so he delicately removed his finger, which was met with an annoyed groan from you. Sliding his digit up your soaking slit, he brought his finger to your sense bud. Rubbing in careful circles, you felt your need for Draco grow even stronger.

"Please, I need more"

"Tell me what you want baby"

"I want your fingers. Want to cum. Please make me cum"

This was what he needed, you falling apart for him. Begging for something as simple as him to finger fuck you, and god the sound of you was better than he imagined. A cocky smirk grace his whiskey coated lips before colliding his lips with yours, a collision of tongues and teeth but it was exactly what you both craved. The messy kiss resembled the messy dynamic you were both about to enter.

Placing his attention back on your weeping hole, he broke away from the kiss. You felt your eyes flutter shut as he entered two of his thick digits into you, this time at a harsh speed. Moans were escaping your body as your orgasm built but Draco was quick to drink them up. The combination of the anticipation and how he was perfectly hitting every spot whilst massaging your clit was getting you there quicker than ever before.

Draco could feel your body getting closer to release, clenching and tensing against his fingers. "Cum for me, show me what a little slut you are."

His words were what pushed you over the edge as you came hard all over your boss's hand. You connected your mouths again in a brief moment of ecstasy. Breaking away from the kiss, you rested your head on his shoulder attempting to catch your breath.

You could feel his harden length through his trousers and the feeling alone was enough to make you need more. Carefully grazing your hand over the evident bulge, you felt the man tense under you.

Before you could do or say anything more, the phone rang.

The sharp sounds were enough to remind both of you that you were still in the office and technically still on the clock. Breaking your stare from the phone, you turned to Draco who simply stated "Better answer it sweetie, it is your job after all".

Rolls of frustration filled your body as you wished he would have simply thrown the phone out the window and taken you on the desk but no, here you were. Standing up from his lap, you picked up the phone.

"Hello, Mr Malfoy's Office. Y/N Speaking."

"Oh, Y/N, hello. I was hoping you would answer" You knew that buttery voice, Astoria Greengrass. Ex-wife of the man who just made you cum, of the man you were hoping to fuck.

"Hi Ms. Greengrass, how are you?" As you said her name, you spotted Draco rise from his chair.

Astoria started on a small rant about how hard dating is as a single mum but you could barely focus on her. The blond haired man had made his way behind your figure, and was slowly undressing you. Button after button until your bra-covered chest was exposed, a quick zip of your skirt left you standing in only your panties and finally, Draco decided to rid you of your panties as well with a quick rip of the fabric.

Whilst Astoria talked your ear off, Draco leaned down towards the other and whispered "Be a good girl and do your job, okay".

You shakily nodded whilst attempting to focus on the words the woman was speaking but you were rendered incapable when you felt his enlarged tip tease your folds. You couldn't help but intake a sharp breath.

"Y/N, are you okay?" Astoria paused, she was always a thoughtful woman who made sure Y/N was leaving enough time for herself between work but now here Y/N was, fucking Astoria's ex-husband whilst on the phone to the woman herself.

"Yep, I'm sorry. I jus-" Her sentence interrupted by Draco fully entering her tight pussy. His cock stretching her out in ways she had never experienced, she couldn't help but whimper in an attempt to hold back a moan. "I stubbed my toe really hard. It's all okay truly."

"Always hurts more than it should." You attempted a chuckle at the woman's remark but it became a strangled moan as Draco picked up the pace. Astoria continued "Anyways, sorry for ranting but I was calling to remind Draco about Scorpius' play on Tuesday, can you please make sure his schedule is clear".

"Yes, of course I will." You manage to respond, trying to focus on being professional rather than focusing on your boss pounding you into oblivion.

"Great, I won't keep you any longer. Thank you dear, have a good night."

You replied a quick 'You too' before slamming the phone down. A plethora of pent up moans rushed from your throat as you felt Draco's full size threaten to split you open, you had never felt this full and god, you loved it.

His slender hand wrapped around your neck, pulling you closer to his chest and gaining more force. "What a good little whore you are! Taking my cock like you were built for me". His words made you clench around him which caused an guttural moan to escape the dominant man.

"Please sir, I need more. I need to cum, please." You were close to seeing stars but you needed more, you craved more.

Draco had never felt more powerful than he did at that moment. Slipping out of you before lifting your body as if you were a ragdoll for his amusement, you were now seated against his desk and face to face with him as he re-entered your soaking pussy dangerously slow. The new angles were enough to make your eyes roll to the back of your head, moaning strings of swears as you approached your peak.

The pale businessman pounded you with such force you thought his desk might break under the pressure, holding your hips so tightly that you were sure to have bruises the following morning. Moans of your name graced the man's lips as he approached his orgasm, as his pace faltered and became uneven.

Grabbing your throat with force, Draco brought his face down to yours. "Cum for me."

His words were all you needed as you felt your climax hit you like a freight train. Moaning his name so loudly that you suspected anyone left in the building would have heard. Your vision darkened as the pleasure rolled over you in waves, feeling the release of all the late nights with your hands between your legs whilst fantasies of Draco fuelled you. The reality was better than the fantasy.

Your climax had left you clenching Draco, milking him dry as he released inside of your warm welcoming pussy. All frustration from work was gone, all the desire he felt for you was enhanced, just everything was right in this moment. He felt his cock soften and carefully slipped himself out, watching as his seed slowly trailed down your plump pussy.

Catching your breath, you slipped off the desk before finding yourself in Draco's arms once again. "That was incredible but I am still mad you fucked me whilst I spoke to your ex-wife"

"Very bold aren't I, kitten?. You have to do your job, no matter what" He chuckled. "What did she want anyways?"

"Wanted me to remind you about Scorpius' play on Tuesday." Answering in a nonchalant tone, which is never how you spoke to him but you were now feeling the repercussions of what just happened and were feeling insecurity, causing you to use attempted nonchalance to hide it. "So I guess I will see you tomorrow?"

"Yes, technically. I will see you tomorrow as well but for now, we are heading to back to my house. Have some dinner and see what happens from there." His gaze was often fierce and stubborn but now it was gentle and almost hopeful, showing that he was also scared of what this meant for your relationship, but hoped that you wouldn't reject his offer of something more romantic.

Even with already flushed cheeks, his words caused light blush to appear "That sounds like a perfect plan to me, Draco."

Draco's fears were put to rest as soon as he heard his name roll of your tongue. You may be wrapped around his finger but he was wholly wrapped around yours. Just took a bold move to release the truth.