#which could be Something I suppose

[millennialdemon]

I don’t know much at all about the real Cleopatra in history, and I don’t think it much matters in watching this movie, because remember, 

But having Cleopatra, as the protagonist of a movie, be controlled by her significantly older, predatory lesbian nanny through the majority of this story is a choice I have to raise a brow at. One because she is a predatory lesbian of course, but also because she is the one that is actually driving the story. Apollodoria is the one plotting to assassinate the Roman leaders, and she trains Cleopatra to do the job for her by… teaching her how to have sex and be seductive I guess… and Cleopatra goes along with it all in order to save Egypt, since her father the pharaoh is spineless and does not even try to defy Caesar politically.

Apollodoria brings Cleopatra to a witch doctor of sorts, who performs magical plastic surgery on her to make her “the most beautiful woman ever” to the ends of ensuring she can ensnare Caesar’s interest, and Cleopatra laments this only momentarily in one line of dialogue, wherein she refers to herself as “artificial”.

Apollodoria concocts the plan to get Cleopatra into Caesar’s room to seduce and kill him, and every time Cleopatra fails to do so, Apollodoria is the one supplying her with new methods and materials to try again. She even tries to get Cleopatra to stab Caesar to death with a hidden dagger while he is distracted by his first meeting with their newborn baby. Eventually, thanks to his own hubris, Caesar meets his end being assassinated by Brutus & Co, having unknowingly survived multiple half-hearted assassination attempts by Cleopatra until that point. Once Caesar is dead, Antony enters Cleopatra’s life, and Apollodoria insists upon his death as well and creates the plan to have to him slaughtered in his fight against Octavian’s approaching army.  

Cleopatra herself really doesn’t have much cunning or ambition in this narrative. She just sort of falls in love with Roman men because they think she is ever so pretty -- and she is ever so pretty because Apollodoria made it so -- and laments their eventual deaths, more so at the hands of Apollodoria than herself. She does nothing to anyone politically, despite being the ruler of Egypt, and all of the desire to save Egypt from Roman invaders is had by Apollodoria in this story, not Cleopatra. In fact, by the end of the story, Cleopatra begs to be returned to the way she was before, and seems to be resigned to just surviving the rest of her (cut very short by Octavian) life.

One of the few times when Cleopatra decides to do something of her own volition, without any coaching or insistence by Apollodoria, it is to do with trying to win back the love of Caesar from his actual wife in Rome, Calpurnia. She breaks into their room with a gun (it’s a long, stupid story) and threatens to kill her for stealing her husband away (that’s not how that works but okay girl). She is scorned by Caesar and Calpurnia alike and abandons Rome, heartbroken. Otherwise Cleopatra spends most of this story trying to brush off Apollodoria’s requests to assassinate her Roman lovers, with no particular goals other than “be wife” in sight. She seemingly has no interest in leading Egypt at all, despite having begun this journey with Apollodoria for the sake of saving it.

Now, I did not go into a movie called Cleopatra: Queen of Sex expecting Cleopatra to be portrayed accurately or in a remotely flattering, not horrendously sexist way. It isn’t so much that I wanted Cleopatra to be a #girlboss #slaying the Roman patriarchy really – as based as that could be – my issue is more with Apollodoria’s role in this narrative, simply because there isn’t much of an internal struggle for Cleopatra to have in her self-titled movie when she is directed to do everything by a wicked old crone, is there?

[goldensunset]

when people refer to canon story-relevant kingdom hearts games as ‘spinoffs’ it makes me sad not only for the obvious reasons i always say but also bc like man i WISH this series had spinoffs. imagine what they could do if they had permission from nomura to truly go off the rails and ignore the greater canon for a second and just do some fun whimsical plotless thing in an alternate universe. imagine a fishing/boating game on destiny islands. kh fighting game. it is an injustice that we have been deprived of kingdom karts. can anyone hear me

[bunnieswithknives]

I feel bad for neglecting Hazel so much, I do have many thoughts about her.. and also a mermaid au that im probably not going to do anything with

[mechieonu]

i know that disney is too big to boycott effectively but that shouldn't translate to "and so we should keep buying their products like normal" but rather "at the very least we should try"

[mohntilyet]

continued rook-lucanis sketches from the last week or so <3

[nattikay]

[front-facing-pokemon]

[tinyq]

An evening out.

[puppyeared]

Why are ppl scared to call it what it is and say we’re still going thru covid on top of seasonal illness. Like. That’s pretty important right. I was watching the news and they were like oh yeah we have an unprecedented number of flu cases “as well as other sicknesses” without actually saying Covid. No announcement abt vaccinations or masking or anything. Also if I hear someone joking abt “war flashbacks” for mentioning covid I fucking hate u

[babypanther95]

One of my first experiences, upon no longer being in Israel and returning to my regular job as a teacher, is a student leaving a note in my classroom that says "Ms. --- is a Jew. No Jews. Hitler to come back." So you know. Really wish I was still in Israel or at least wasn't the only Jewish person at the school (teacher or student). By the way, I teach 6th grade...

[socksandbuttons]

Please More bean eclipse au but… it’s sun babying Eclipse! Because he gets over his trauma via babying Eclipse right?

Also the baby carrier is funny 😄

Absolutely love that Sun gets over his trauma by babying the younger brother. In a sense its what they both need. To you and the anon who wanted something nice for Sun and Bean Eclipse interacting. Eclipse is far more comfortable being carried or held by Sun vs Moon actually. (altho like... in terms of who he'd rather be held by. Its KC, then Earth then Sun (Lunar is a contender only Sometimes). Never Monty. Moon is never perferred on this list but always over Monty.) Also just kinda... BY HEIGHT PREFERENCE LOL

Also Bonus!

Bloodmoon's arrival means i finally get to explore Bloodmoon and Sun bonding (This man jsut has trauma between these two where we settle it by Family Time because its obvious its needed and Sun admits this.) Also Bloodmoon being a bully and trying to steal attention and mess with Eclipse.

[andorerso]

.

[sparring-spirals]

im still thinking about that moment last episode where they're planning how to approach dancer and we got:

Ashton: "yeah we should go in with a ginger approach, make sure she doesn't run"

Imogen with complete sincerity, immediately: "so should i just go and calm her emotions right away?"

Ashton with zero judgement or concern: "that, or i was going to pin her down, but that's cool too."

and then when FCG naturally panics over why are we attacking dancer they both turn in sync to be like! No!!! not attacking. restraining. 👍 :) like what. you're both. mildly messed up on exactly the same wavelength here. i love them both so much. what do you mean overkill. this IS my ginger approach. I'm Doing The Job By Whatever Means Necessary Why Are You Yelling.

Something something two people who have spent their lives learning to suppress their flinch/doubt reflex when in a crisis. Out of a horrible necessity. Those two Problem Solving together with a casual sort of callousness. and looking at each other like 👍? 👍 meanwhile FCG is in the background going "wait we're talking about attacking her???" "no of COURSE not, just restraining!" god i adore them.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

I'm in love with your drawing of Wally and Howdy fighting over the arm. I love how mad Poppy is. Her saying "is2g" gave me the idea that she starts cussing more the longer she has to deal with this bs. And I'm also imagining Frank leaning against Eddie's hat saying "oh Eddie we're really in it now"

10 out of 10 artwork. Good job. No notes.

it has been Well Received it seems! i'm very pleased, i was hoping i wouldn't be the only one who found it funny ahaha

and i couldn't resist:

[ganondoodle]

(idk if anyone wants to keep hearing my opinions on totk book stuff but-)

apparently it says that rauru DID have kids, multiple even, which yeah... is kinda necessary for zelda to even be connected to them so much so that sonia can SENSE a blood connection (which, even with all the excuses with magic, is just a little too far for me to suspend my disbelief bc its over, OVER, ten thousand years worth of generations that seperate her from them that one lil touch of the hand can sense that (feels more like an attempt to make you care about them or .. see them as zeldas "better" parents just bc they exchange a few nice words, i never got the feeling they were 'better' parents and its also kinda disrespectful to her actual parents, like sure rhoam wasnt the best but i wouldnt call rauru better just bc he was polite)- i could see maybe the light power of hylia or sth but since its the coolest dude that ever lived rauru now that had it which still doesnt make sense and makes me unreasonably annoyed and she can sense BOTH of their powers in her? nah) the fact theres NOTHING about them in the game itself is just so ... no way they planned any of this

i dont think theres anything they can do or say that wont make be believe they either

are making it up alla 'fix it in post' mentality trying to hastily explain stuff the game never bothers to do to try and appease fans or let it appear as if they thought about it at all

something went really REALLY wrong during development, which kinda seems likely given how the game turned out (im sorry i cannot let go, its not just the writing, the game design too and how little was changed in the map while being so damn expensive, i dont know how people dont feel scammed q_q)

given that they (allegedly) spent the last entire year of development on polish (where??? where????? huh??? like it would make it more understandable (EXCEPT for the price) if there was alot of trouble, which was also bc it got delayed and ... turned out like this, but they dont want to say it, especially given their reputation, with that quote i have heard way too many times 'a delayed game blah blah') i just??

are they just gonna go and do it like they did with kashiwa (kass)? "they uuuh where flying around the whole time ony cool sonau tech maschines, you just dont see or hear from them ooooorrr they were uuuuh out of the country at the time" (sending invitations to other continents to join their glorious kingdom ;) )

(bet they are also gonna say they did all the stuff like ... moving the shrines around (lol?) and lifting the islands up into the sky- which is still weird bc ... didnt they also say they were living in the sky before coming to the surface?? so where?? did they park all their islands on the surface and the mystery kids had the keys so they had to repark them back into the sky after they returned off camera?? xD also why are the islands so different as an environment if they where from the surface? like even the STONE up there is different- and if they were first in the sky then on the surface and the nback in the sky .. why is there not a single yellow tree or grass in the past- you cant really argue that it changed bc they were up there so long bc .. nothing else changed, the suddendly and totally always there sonau buildings are largely in prime condition, only some slightly moldy, and what we see of the glorious past looks barely any different from the present, aside from like ... some standard trees shuffled, no castle yet and that glowy uwu filter DESPITE that stupidly long time frame between it)