#which at this point i would believe lmao
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also not sure how I’m feeling knowing that thousands upon thousands of dollars and manpower have been spent on a rescue mission for four days straight when the submersible probably imploded as soon as contact was lost and has been sitting on the ocean floor this entire time lmao
#oceangate#titanic#the titanic#the titan#i mean of course they have the right to be searched for but……god what a WASTE of resources#someone said the company might have known they imploded the entire time but we’re leaving to the coast guard to find out#which at this point i would believe lmao
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A Series 💚
#joe burrow#ja'marr chase#joe'marr#i just wanted these all together lol#trying to figure out the sequence of events based on the placement of joe's phone in his hand#assuming at this point it was phone call (i think we can rule out it being to ja'marr at this point)#(unless he was calling and ja'marr wasn't answering because he was trying to find him? also possible.)#(but then to just sneak up RIGHT next to him and hug that guy while joe is calling him?? that would be funny actually)#anyways. then joe ends said phone call. notices ja'marr. switches his phone to his other hand#to put it away? but gets distracted laughing with ja'marr#OR it's the reverse order and joe excuses himself to take a phone call and ja'marr goes to hug that guy#but that would require joe already having his phone out to call someone before ending the conversation with ja'marr#which doesn't feel likely to me. because that man FOCUSES when he's talking to someone#ESPECIALLY when it's ja'marr#but i suppose we'll never know!#maybe more of these will trickle out. maybe a video. we can only hope!#EDIT: i almost forgot the video of just joe alone on the phone#no idea if that helps solve anything though lmao#he's pretty isolated at that point whereas in the first pic there's all lkinds of people around them#hmmmmm#i invite your theories#the fact that he's talking to someone leads me to believe it wasn't ja'marr on the phone then#unless he's leaving a very funny and charming voicemail
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Turtles of Time
<prev [2/7] next>
#tmnt#tmnt 2003#leonardo splinterson#donatello splinterson#raphael splinterson#michaelangelo splinterson#april o'neil#Casey Jones#Master Splinter#out of touch turts day#I changed the lyrics a little but it’s fine it’s all good#mikey would approve I think#I honestly believe with all my heart hes are the easiest versions to draw#I’m sure you’ve figured out what all the different parts are now but if not#thats okay youll get it by the next part#which btw brownie points to hiwever can guess whats next xx#casey looks like shit but idc#i also put him behind april instead of under everyone but we have to live with that#its an easy fix that i am not doing lmao#did this one and the last one when i was sick so#hopefully ill do the next one by next week but if not who cares#maybe the first person to guess what next could get a little silly sketch as a prize? that be cool
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My younger sibling literally blocked my phone number because we got into an argument over capitalism ???
Wow I reached the tag limit on this post
Beware a long vent in the tags lmao
#shitpost#vent#(in the tags)#her indifference to the world and willingness to participate in the corrupt parts of society pisses me off#if she found out the developers of a mobile app she likes were actually xenophobic or smth she wouldn't even care bc it doesnt affect her#she would rather stay ignorant and harm others than accept that some things she likes have bad impacts on the world#even ai. which arguably DOES affect her bc shes creative. but she just doesnt see how it harms her bc its not an active type of harm#its just in the background closing in on you#even if her own stuff was stolen by ai she just WOULDNT FUCKING CARE#and it makes me mad!!!#shes so ignorant. to the world and also to others#if she doesnt understand something she doesnt care#if she doesnt understand why i use it/its or he/him then she just. doesnt use them for me#and then if i confront her says “well you didn't tell me”#LIKE. I WEAR A LANYARD WITH MY PRONOUNS ON IT. HOW FUCKING HARD CAN IT BE TO JUST. LOLK AT MY LANYARD#agh this got off topic#anyways. my point is she makes me mad#goddd the way she sees capitalism#she called me dumb for “not understanding business”#and i said anyone who DOES understand business knows it's crap and capitalism is awful#and she just got mad and blocked my number#her problem is that shes STUBBORN. and she hates being corrected.#and shes so insistent on being an ally. shes literally part of the lgbtq community.#but her problem is that she doesnt care enough.#she rants to me about Trump being stupid. but not in a “im worried abt the trans ppl in our country” way#in a “lmao hes dumb i can't believe hes so stuuuupid” way#she doesnt get it#to her it's like. the aesthetic and moral highground of being an ally. but without actually caring#its one thing to joke a bit but its another to joke while also ignoring the issues#UGH SHE PISSES ME OFF SO BAD
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Amy Dunne Character Analysis
Disclaimer
This analysis will be of Amy’s character from both the book and the movie, although the 2014 movie adaption takes greater precedence with only some additional details and quotes included from the book as it does delve deeper into Amy’s psyche and add further characterization. Thus some traits may be accentuated further than they are in the movie, not being completely faithful to either story. It’s an analysis of Amy in her totality across mediums, of course being entirely my opinion. There are of course adaptational differences but I will not include the major ones from the books (ex. her relationship with Hillary Hand). This is an analysis focusing primarily on Amy’s neuroses she demonstrates and the childhood links to them, it doesn’t cover in-depth the events nor themes of Gone Girl.
Amy Elliott Dunne, the ever enigmatic dual protagonist- antagonist of Gone Girl is one of the most iconic female villains in modern memory, and one of the paragons of the “good for her” trope in media, is, frankly, one of my favorite characters of all time. As such I have been dying to write a full analysis examining her neuroses and characterization. Beneath the cultural perception of just another “crazy psycho” for girls to claim “she did no wrong” or “she just like me fr!”, lies a fascinating character who is masterfully written and developed by Gillian Flynn, as well as perfectly portrayed by Rosamund Pike. Amy Dunne is a character with a deep, complex psychology that I will do my best to thoroughly explore in this analysis.
From Amy’s childhood we first see the emergence of a literal high ego ideal, Amazing Amy. Of course this is the children’s book series created by her parents with a fictionalized version of Amy being the eponymous protagonist. This was a version of herself that rectified her own personal failures. Amazing Amy became a prodigy at cello, when Amy quit at 10, Amazing Amy made varsity volleyball, Amy got cut freshman year. Even in the (at time) final book in the series, Amazing Amy got married, a task Amy had not yet done. The entire book series revolved around Amy always making the most virtuous, the most selfless, the most perfect decisions.
>”With me, regular, flawed, real Amy, jealous, as always, of the golden child.”
An interesting detail in the book that is omitted from the movie is Marybeth’s numerous miscarriages and stillbirths (which totaled 7). All of these girls were named Hope, until Amy was born. Amy expresses her jealousy towards them, as they were always seen as perfect without ever living; meanwhile Amy herself has to live life everyday knowing that she will never truly live up to the Hopes. That she has to try everyday to be the best she can be. Her very birth was mired in the expectation of a perfect child; given that she was practically a gift from the heavens to her parents.
This sets up Amy’s perfectionism, as the childhood experience of never living up to a projected ideal led her to want to be perfect (and as we’ll later see, the expectation that everyone else is too), to live life always through the gaze of another. Evidently this leads to a loss of one’s inner essence, one’s individuality and sense of self.
>“-I’d never really felt like a person, because I was always a product” (Book Quote)
Amy’s obsession with personas can be seen as emerging from this, as she adapts a personality depending on who she’s interacting with, as to always be the most appealing she can, she is Amazing Amy after all.
>”I’m not sure, exactly, how to be Dead Amy. I’m trying to figure out what that means for me, what I become for the next few months. Anyone, I suppose, except people I’ve already been: Amazing Amy. Preppy ’80s Girl. Ultimate-Frisbee Granola and Blushing Ingenue and Witty Hepburnian Sophisticate. Brainy Ironic Girl and Boho Babe (the latest version of Frisbee Granola). Cool Girl and Loved Wife and Unloved Wife and Vengeful Scorned Wife. Diary Amy.” (Book Quote)
This general attitude leads to people trying to impress her as she places herself as someone special and especially someone to keep around. She entices both the characters and viewers of the film through her manufactured charisma and enchantment. However, we’ll see this dramatically backfire in her relationship with Nick, just you wait!
For now we can focus on the beginning of their relationship as well as what I believe to be Amy’s view on romance.
I believe that Amy has an impossibly high standard of love, one that stems from her perfectionism and general inability to let down her guise of being amazing. Not to mention how her parents were a perfect match, Amy even referring to them as soul-mates.
>”They have no harsh edges with each other, no spiny conflicts, they ride through life like conjoined jellyfish—expanding and contracting instinctively, filling each other’s spaces liquidly. Making it look easy, the soul-mate thing.” (Book Quote)
In her childhood it’s implied that she was into romance novels, specifically Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice, which obviously contributes to the idealization of romance, of a literal scripted love.
>”You were an alienated teen and only Elizabeth Bennet understood you”
I think this little quote is incredibly indicative; it establishes a sense of alienation, of Amy never quite fitting in and blending with others.
>”So many lessons and opportunities and advantages, and they never taught me how to be happy. I remember always being baffled by other children. I would be at a birthday party and watch the other kids giggling and making faces, and I would try to do that too, but I wouldn’t understand why. I would sit there with the tight elastic thread of the birthday hat parting the pudge of my underchin, with the grainy frosting of the cake bluing my teeth, and I would try to figure out why it was fun.” (Book Quote)
Back to the topic of romance, through these stories it allowed her to imagine her perfect romance: if Amy could find that one person that truly understood her, beyond the illusion, that then would constitute a perfect union of love. She does deep down (whether consciously or not) want to be loved for who she is; not the idealized, palatable, literal marketed version of herself. Thus she holds trust as a premium, expecting that if she does the Herculean task of unspooling and revealing herself to another, that the other person would love her no matter what.
>”Can you imagine, finally showing your true self to your spouse, your soul mate, and having him not like you?” (Book Quote)
However all of this culminates in an impossibly high standard of a lover, of a practically divine mythical love; where one loves totally and absolutely. Of course where this neurosis is most demonstrated is in Nick and Amy’s relationship.
Amy comments that after meeting Nick she finally felt like a person as he brought out a side of herself that hadn’t been seen, in her own words “a lightness and an ease”, something that Amy enjoyed. In her eyes they had the perfect relationship in the beginning, Nick was her compliment with the witty banter, with their inside jokes, and charm.
However this doesn’t just vanquish her childhood neuroses, through her desire to be seen as perfect, she modifies herself to be a “cool girl” for Nick, complying endlessly to standards to maintain this perception.
>” When I met Nick Dunne, I knew he wanted a cool girl and for him, I’ll admit, I was willing to try.”
Amy essentially became Nick’s image of a perfect girl, witty, fun, and most of all easy-going and forgiving.
Yet one cannot live forever in images and ideas; and as such, the real, true Amy emerged. The Amy that cares too much, that’s hard to get along with, that is a controlling perfectionist. She also tests Nick through the treasure hunts, weaving in little details about their relationship as to challenge Nick and hope that he remembers the things they do together as deeply as she does. Combined with the 2008 recession and declining health of Nick’s mother (the consequences of which will be explored later). As well as Nick’s growing dissatisfaction in the relationship (evidenced by his worsening performances in the treasure hunts, the cheating, using her for sex and ignoring her otherwise, etc). The illusion both Nick and Amy were living in crumbled; they couldn’t possibly sustain their relationship as they were both striving to fulfill reciprocating images for the other.
One of the biggest parts of her character is Amy’s elitism and entitlement, in which she thinks of herself as someone superior, someone that deserves to be loved absolutely for who she is, although only to people she considers worthy.
>”She’s easy to like. I’ve never understood why that’s considered a compliment—that just anyone could like you.” (Book Quote)
Once again this stems from her childhood, in a seemingly contradictory way, she also sees herself as special for being the one that survived from her mother’s attempts, as well as the fact that her birth was so tumultuous that she would be an only child. From this also stems her entitlement for love.
Amy actively looks down upon women she considers “average”, whom she sees as coming from mediocrity and continuously perpetuating that in their lives. She scoffs at them with her wealthy parents and NYC background until her marriage with Nick crumbles. Only then does she realize that she’s become the very woman she would previously disdain. A woman with a failing marriage, the loss of her previous wealth following the recession, and moving to a failed development in Missouri (What the hell’s in Missouri?) for Nick’s mother.
I truly believe this, combined with Nick’s infidelity, and most importantly the loss of her idyllic love culminated in the iconic Gone Girl plan.
>”Nick took and took from me until I no longer existed, that’s murder. Let the punishment fit the crime”.
Nick took Amy’s identity, her sense of self that she so generously revealed to him and rejected her. Implying that she would only be loved if played the role of the “cool girl”; stripping her of who she really was, losing herself in yet another persona. Although Amy admits she doesn’t really have a personality and lives through personas, she still has a semblance of self that she holds dear.
>”-made me realize that there was a Real Amy in there, and she was so much better, more interesting and complicated and challenging, than Cool Amy”. (Book Quote)
Worse yet, Nick had cheated on her with a “newer, younger, bouncer Cool Girl”, leaving Amy in the dust, surely damaging her pride.
But Amy truly fell in love with her idealized version of Nick, believing that she was responsible for shaping that version of Nick. That she deserved that man in his entirety, of course what gets Amy to come back to Nick is the Sharon Scheiber interview, in which he promises to make up with Amy in just the way that makes her think that Nick is the one person who gets her. He makes the little references to their inside jokes (2 fingers on the chin when they’re not bullshitting the other) and a reference to the end of the treasure hunt (always a contentious issue in their relationship). She’s reminded of who he was, that he was once perfect for her, who else could know how to appeal to her heart in just the right way? With the same passion and conviction she reverses the judgment on Nick, clawing her way back to him. She does so in an especially brutal manner, slashing Desi’s throat with a boxcutter right after he climaxes. Putting aside my enormous personal bias against Desi, he was technically an innocent man, taking a great risk in sheltering Amy. However it’s clear that Amy sees him as merely an asset and something to be disposed of once he serves his value, as another prop in her ever evolving masterplan; she did string him along for years through their letter correspondences. He was just another casualty in Amy’s search for idyllic love. She comes back dramatically, literally falling into Nick’s arms while still covered in Desi’s blood like a dress; fabricating an elaborate story about a love obsessed former boyfriend kidnapping and violating her. Despite the glaring holes in her whole story (If Amy’s marriage was as bad as she made it out to be, why did she go back to Nick so easily? How did she get access to a knife and kill him so seamlessly? Why didn’t Amy do anything when she discovered the stuff in Margo’s shed? etc), law enforcement, media, and the public all fully believe it, infatuated with the persona and narrative that Amy’s created for herself. In the end she traps Nick into the marriage and eventually, the family. The last shot of the film is a haunting recall to the beginning shot of the film, as Amy has both revealed and secured herself to be the master of the narrative, finally obtaining her perfect love, no matter what the cost may have been.
Conclusion
Through a constant demand in Amy’s childhood emerges a need for perfection, simultaneously bringing about a sense of superiority and entitlement. The use of personas and façades facilitate this, painting Amy as the most amazing cool girl for whomever she’s performing for, to feed her need to be seen as perfect and desirable. Yet there emerges a psychological detachment from others; as the need to perform inevitably leads to an internal hollowness. However underneath all these layers there also lies the true Amy who has the deep unconscious desire of wanting to be loved absolutely, to have a perfect union of love where she can reveal herself fully and be loved for who she is truly.
>disclaimer for tumblr lol, this is not me trying to claim Amy was innocent I am fully aware that she’s a terribly entitled and narcissistic person but she can still be complex and have relatable desires & be a person even if she’s massively fucked up!!
#amy dunne#gone girl#gillian flynn#I love Amy Dunne so much#my little meow meow#analysis#character analysis#final draft of the analysis me thinks!!#unless I rewrite the conclusion which is very likely :P#I want to write one comparing the book to the movie#and speak on those said adaptional differences#my gone girl brainrot is terminal#(no I never referenced her typology in this whatttttt…..)#this doesn’t have much commentary into real life stuff (I am e5 ni base I can’t speak on such matters)#this is just a -why Amy is fucked up and the way she is- analysis#Also I don’t care if Amy isn’t actually that much of a she just like me fr character. I’ve said it okay and I’m a teenage girl (checkmate)#also b4 anyone comes for me & is like Amy literally says she doesn't believe in unconditional love#so then y would she crave it/doesn't that disprove ur point#well 1. she's unreliable as FUCK 2. note my use of unconscious!!#also fun fact. in one of the first drafts of the novel#her parents were (quote unquote) relationship experts that focused the idea of a perfect couple (another quote unquote)#& wrote a book called the undivided child: how to raise a perfectly whole being#which is just. lmao#the excerpts from that early draft r so fascinating
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"Yesterday is over and tomorrow nears"
"But I just wanna lay right here"
"A blanket on your shoulder as tomorrow nears"
"But I just wanna stay right here"
#gpose#wolship#endwalker#/#//#nemilque#enw#gposing a momentn in the planned roleplay you havent gotten there so it migth not even go like this#cue me desperately looking for a sharlayan studio place and being devastated one that would ahve made a comfier seat by a window and more u#natural leg posing. but im happy with how the firework is both comforting but reminiscent of the chronology point which is#post zodiark and aware the final days wil happen any moment LMAO#Studio address in the replies. i cant believe there are so few sharlayan themed houses lol
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Full Tech Day One pic today from kiko laureano (denizen of skid row / ensemble) & video (that's four seconds of "ya never know" playing over the static image) from & ft. marcia milgrom dodge (director / choreographer) double captioning "there might be puppets in this musical ;)" & "Well Shake my hand! Come see LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS @guthrietheater featuring @actually_will_roland's hand!"
#buzz lightyear screenshot i don't believe that's a puppet Or will roland's hand#lsoh#frog & toad shirt yay :) that i believe is saying ''frog & toad are gay'' yahoooo#in unfamiliarity with lsoh: had to look up that snippet of song. i do enjoy the full Songs i should straightup....pick an album of them?#which; relevantly to this being a show with Versions. also like i've only seen the movie once a minute ago....#i know the movie Differed like the musical going well audrey dies then so also does seymour :( does one tragicomically lose a hand first#classic Hey My Hand :( maneuver :( still i reflect on the change like i don't want them to die.... :(#it's Enriching though to reflect on. like a fun balance of ''is there shortcomings of Metaphors? maybe but it's backed up by Story''#then are there shortcomings of story? maybe but it's backed up by how that'll play into a strength of metaphor. makes it Overall Enjoyable#and that i'm not an expert like plenty to muse on re: what are the Metaphors. and then how are they executed. what do i think#and i'm enrichingly not quite settled on Should They Get To Survive; Metaphorically? like i think it's fine either way#i mean we also Have it both ways lol. i think? i don't know about past or present variations versions iterations re: Onstage Medium#it's like it's supposed to be tragic too right right cautionarily so. yet. i indeed go :( about it. i think it's fine it's fine....#or do i. as you can see lmao a fun In Progress mental journey....like pointing to Doomed Tragic Couple iphegenia crash land falls#i would Not change it i would not Want it changed. not even for a what if; really. yet their basis is Knowing They're Kindredly Doomed.....#seymour and audrey are just america's little t4t couple who Do deserve to murder orin plant or no & More :(#much to consider. and always little Invocations to spice things up like & this plant won't stop trying to fuck them i guess#nodding thoughtfully as we are also amidst aesthetics that invoke larger contexts re: race; class; maybe even. gender. and more????#love a lot going on. love that it's really not trying to Be extremely settled in some Conclusive manner in any version. tends to be a win#and love that SPIT TAKE rick moranis walking on into the closing performance of be more chill on broadway???????#enjoy that one post of [god's mistake of making me so incredibly attracted to rick moranis] '80s gum stickers. ricky m#guy who's never seen kapow-i gogo seeing another show with a prop hand: wow this is just like kapow-i gogo
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i am not anti-media-piracy, in fact i support it heartily on the media preservation level, and i have mixed but partially positive feelings about it on the individual choice/saving money level...
but the way some people talk about piracy like it's a heroic thing to do - not in the preservation sense, but in the 'fuck companies!!! if i can get something for free and screw them over, I'm fighting capitalism!' sense - oh some people sound like real goobers with those arguments.
#to me it's ... complicated#bc 100% i don't want media to be lost#and i have lots and lots of issues iwth the way modern entertainment companies try to extract profits/don't share revenue appropriately wit#all the people who actually MAKE the art.#i have lots of issues with that...!#however i am also an artist and have the crazy belief that art including movies tv games etc has value#and in our current world... paying for art/entertainment you enjoy is like... the way to ensure it is possible#do i dream of a utopia with UBI/guaranteed arts funding where we didn't have to depend on corporations to make art as investments?#of course i do!#however i don't believe that is likely to come to pass anytime soon....#and like... no i dont think anyone is a Rotten Person to the Core for pirating tv/movies#however. i do firmly believe that paying for art when you are able and when you value it is important.#some people will be like 'boohoo poor companies are mad that i dont pay for their product when i can pirate it for free!!!!'#like yes? it costs a lot of money to make! of course they want a profit#i have issues with the degree to which profits are extracted to the wealthy few in the present day#and i have issues/worries about the fundamental monetization structures of TV especially at the current moment#but i do not have an issue with the basic premise that companies would fund expensive large-scale art (like tv or movies) and expect to mak#a profit from funding such a large project#imo if u truly wanna pretend you're pirating in an anticapitalist way#you'd pirate something then venmo the normal cost to a random employee who worked on the production#lmao#that's still obviously a little flawed but like. u get my point? good. i hope ur having a good day#hypothetical person who reads my rambling tags this deep.#d
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i have Thoughts
#just me hi#i'm gonna ramble now check this out Lmaoo:#ofc any major belief built on hating someone sucks. like fundamentally#and mostly the idea is that you would be protecting yourself and the Similar-to-yous (which is U-2.0)#and it's confusing like. what do you get out of this ?#ik there's the satisfaction. the deep feeling of security you get in your stomach believing that you're right and your anger is purifying#that you're somehow anointed for persecution by Words and Actions you see through the other side of a water glass#and i don't know what i'm tryna say. i'm confused hjfshvgh#of course there's fear. there's a lot of fear. but it's very selfish fear. the kind that makes you protect others because they're Just like#you#and i dunno. what's the point ? so you hate somebody. that's cool :)#how can you love people then. do you love people because they are people or because they have faces you wish you had ? or you can see faces#on them that may not be there ? or they say your face can be like theirs if you only try and never stray ? or that you've had this face all#along. why change? you can't change it's wrong#i dunno man. this makes no sense !!#isn't it always scary to hate everything ? i know it is#like yes the world hates everyone anyway but what is special about that ? what makes this fear worth so much more than another person ?#i dunnooooooo ♪#maybe im just naive! but holding onto somethin like that until you find solace in misery is no way to be baby! i'm gonna go eat snow outsid#//anywhoooooooooo i AM drawing. and that IS in fact a lie i've been procrastinating on it for some timeeeeeeeeeee ggoroughhhhhhhhhhhh LMAO#i don't wanna :( but i REALLY wanna you get what i'm sayin hfshjgjfsh#it could be so easy.. life could be a dream life could be a dream... doo doo doo doo ba dee...... ♪#i need to find an animal for this though and i don't wanna 😔 i do hate this part of the process jfhgfjghjsf#don't like.. researching animals..... it's Not fun lol#but i must prevail. because it's inevitable that i do :/ oh wells#so i'm gonna GO and watch my VIDEO and have a SNACK and DRAW :33 because i WANNA. okey doke hjfshgs#TOODLES 💫💥#//edit: also lowkey i feel like hate is too weak word for this kinda thing ykno? like damn what's got the gates of hell open dude chill Lol#okay BYEEE
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“Look for the strengths in yourself” this. “Your trauma doesn’t define you or make you inherently wrong” that. Do it out of spite. Value yourself out of spite.
What? Those douchebags told you that you weren’t worth anything? Fuck them! Treat yourself like you’re worth something! Get back at those fuckers!
Those assholes conditioned you into thinking you were terrible by treating you like shit? Condition yourself back! Keep valuing yourself and doing self care over and over until you drown them out. Until they’re as stupid and small in your brain as they are in real life.
Fucking win the emotional manipulation game! Win it! Draw something shit because it makes you feel happy! What, you can’t say no to people because you’re not worth as much as them? Fuck that! Say no all the time! Treat yourself like the most important person in the universe because they would hate it!
#so had a epiphany with a client the other day#essentially this#spite is the best way to do anything#and yes I’m in the mental health field#which would shock the tumblr bot who saw my blog and tried to send me to a therapy blog#which was adorable but jesus#and shocking to people who’ve commented saying I’m way to cynical about mental health and asking if I’m okay#I’m so unbelievably stable I help other people get stable lmao#it’s just sometimes the sunshine and rainbows approach works for people#and sometimes it doesn’t#and I’m just incredible super blunt about how I feel and experience things#which is sometimes yucky when it’s mental health or cptsd or my experience being neurodivergent in this society#you have points when your brain isn’t gonna believe that you’re good#that things can get better#rationally you will but emotionally your brain has conditioned itself out of hope and self regard#so sometimes you gotta motivate yourself with anger and spite#those assholes don’t deserve your life#and then you’ll get to the actual hope and happy feelings point#and then you’ll drop again#because this is how it works#and yucky emotions are not always bad or shameful#sometimes spite and anger is justified and can motivate you to change#sometime stress helps you survive#sometimes sadness helps you stop and realise somethings wrong#fuck depression though that one is just bad#(I’m kidding lmao)#seriously for me who gets depressive spirals often#and likely will for my entire life#depression feelings tells me I haven’t been making time for myself#and I’m overwhelmed
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i don’t think leaving the crows entirely is in the cards for magpie and lucanis but i can see a post game future where lucanis gives up the first talon seat, probably after caterina dies and he’s been forced to actually Do His Job as first talon for a couple of months and has a breakdown about it lol. i think after that he and magpie just like, operate more or less independently but are still technically crows. because magpie simply will not leave while viago is there. that isn’t an option. but if lucanis giving up on being first talon is what keeps them both sane and allows them to spend more time with neve she could do that. so probably they just live out their days killing blood mages and cultists across tevinter for insane sums of money and in between help neve solve her cases and still host family dinners with viago and teia occasionally :)
#idk who the new first talon would be but i Do have a series of very dramatic scenes in my mind#that take place over a couple of years and culminate in lucanis losing his fucking mind after caterina dies for real#bc i believe his avoidant ass is refusing to actually do anything of substance while she’s alive and running the show#which is a major point of contention between him and caterina. because she wants him to learn what needs to be done and he refuses#and runs off to tevinter at the slightest provocation.#it doesn’t help that before the events of the game magpie’s whole career as a crow was getting viago into the fifth talon seat#and then protecting his status#and so she’s…. kind of on caterina’s side. slightly.#however she’s also happy to run off to tevinter on contracts so it’s mostly her going ‘maybe you should listen to caterina? idk. whatever.’#i do believe there’s an issue with she insists the seat go to viago but lucanis is leaning toward teia because he thinks it’s what caterina#would have wanted. idk how this is decided in the end#basically i’ve devised a series of fights for magpie and lucanis to get into that neve has no idea how to resolve because it’s Crow Business#LMAO#i’ll have more thoughts on her place in this when i’ve finished her romance i think#but 1. i still don’t know if her getting blighted is canon and 2. i want to see how her romance plays out#before i can really decide#so it’s mostly lucanis and magpie drama rn#漫言#oc. magpie#r. birds of a feather#datv spoilers
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i’m pretty sure the reason we got nagosaka’s second round of solos mimicking the og album art was bc kr was making a concerted effort to bridge the gap between the amount of music the ogs and nagosaka have lol
but those first solos for the og divisions were their beginnings as characters so maybe we can pretend round two solos for nagosaka is their true beginning lol
#vee queued to fill the void#both sasara and kuukou backslid in terms of development between the mcd era and 2nd drb#and i blame the true hypnosis mic lol#sasara while still a flighty sonuva btch opened himself up to samatoki in a way he should have with rosho (bc of his past with rosho)#and kuukou believe it or not lol would not be the type to trash an entire establishment and stay blind to his team’s needs back in the day#like kuukou is quite literally learning that lesson about not charging bullishly at others’ problems in both the unami chapter and nb track#and what does he do with jyushi and hitoya in harmonious cooperation???? charge bullishly at them assuming that’s all it’d take to help them#frfr both sasara and kuukou backslid lol#post 2nd drb tho???? with these solos????? where they’re fundamentally the same but show the lessons learned?????#these solos are their starting point ACTUALLY lol#which would make nagosaka’s first solos more representative of their pasts ngl!!!!!!#like those solos probably suit the nagosaka in the first manga run!!!!!#kuukou cocky as shit jyushi defined by his past hitoya’s finest rizz but heart hidden#sasara my life’s a tragic comedy let me run away to find a different outlook rosho trying to figure out how to stand on his own#rei the mastermind and that’s all you need to know lol it lines up very well#man!!!!!! that’s some good shit lol!!!!! this is the stuff that has kept me in hypmic for half a decade LMAO
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does watching a video essay on midnight mass (that i have not watched) count as research for haze dogs
#haze dogs has fantasy catholicism aka i make shit up like someone asked to explain catholicism from memory... which is what i'm doing#would you believe if i said i have never read the bible to completion or even one singular book of the bible start to finish lmao#i have a bible Somewhere that i might pick up for a couple if things in haze dogs#mainly the language around the resurrection and maybe revelations and the rapture#because Boy i just realised something about the ending#this video essay is making me think too about the 3 days until jesus' return after getting mega killed#and also stigmata. i need to give connor stigmata#the haze dogs have stigmata. one of them is missing its head and it's still kicking!#but also what if the body and blood of christ was fr fr in the eucharist of the town#i made a point that they have sheep around so the haze dogs attack them and not the people#they could dice up a sheep for mass and eat it during “mass” if that's what we wanna call connor's cult#or one of them. there's a couple people who want to use her as their golden calf lmao#but yeah <3#pia.txt#( wip ) haze dogs
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blade gunnblade !!!!!!!!
via eliza simpson:
There are no words for this true warrior. They kill me. MMM: went in for a post show hug. Me:"ow!" Asia: "oh sorry, that's my bullet necklace." 😳........ 😍
#blade gunnblade#asia kate dillon#kapow-i gogo#eliza simpson of [angel & others in the mysteries] & [the mother line story project] & [saw ak dillon in triptych yes we're jealous]#& [princess cloudberry in kapow-i gogo]#here we also see stephen stout in the 1st pic but going ''!! surely our dear cherished blade gunnblade's back. hair's long though hmm''#only to have that cleared up by the 3rd pic thank god =']#i guess at some point blade gunnblade has blue hair & i do love that for them#i believe they're in part 3 but i have all the less information about that plausible appearance#(and of course still no info on [asia perhaps doubling roles with the longer black haired wig & ultracorp jacket in that one pic?])#one thing that would be fascinating & fun is if part 3 blade has more of part 1 kapow-i's look. the bright blue hair#looks like pink lipstick. Pure Speculation but i know the like [this is reaction to You Know How Media Is] element discussed like#part 1 thinking most [sat. morning cartoons experience; the legend of] part 2 is like when these series get sequels or just some#ep or turning point that upends its own previous established conventions. Darker more Serious / Mature Themes etc#part 3 like well sequel to That which adds yet another layer of the same factor there lol#i'm not really that versed in All This Media directly b/c i'm not that versed in / familiar with much of any media directly but#i am also not completely at sea & also one thing i could think of is like. blade is our revenge vengeance tragic anti antagonist lmao#what if after that they get to lighten up in delightful contrast to the torment & tragedy. turn more optimistic moral support bestie etc#but like i said utter speculation based on ''oh this is a look they have?'' & comments on [comments on material commenting on itself] so#could be anything! or nothing! except that it's Something enough to have been photographed a couple of times. thank god#oh hang on also we can see that that's stephen stout's character in the pic of Wearing A Black Longer Haired Wig & Ultracorp Jacket#who's to say it isn't also: yes that's blade disguised or something. underneath they have this bright blue shorter wig & Blade Outfit lol#i would cheer for that. compelling#(also noting that it didn't preclude a doubling of roles instead but; that figure Is wearing blade's necklace. makes it easy to switch to#Blade Mode backstage; makes it easy to switch to Blade Mode onstage....)#which: noted! bullet necklace! makes sense lmao. sort of#also pic 2 ft. director kristin mccarthy parker fyi. and the typical blade hair length i.e. simply asia's own.#''😳........ 😍'' soooooo true ''MMM:'' standing for ''most memorable moment:'' and also sooooo true as well#blade gunnblade is everything to me. if they died in part 3 i'm blowing this whole building up. they have bright blue hair now
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ok be honest. how many of us let astarion kill the gur in the swamp and then got the interaction of him coming onto tav while he looked like mega shit from getting his ass handed to him in the fight
#i believe he targets astarion intentionally? not something i know of but i would assume as much it makes sense + by that point in the natura#l flow of the game if you havent beelined the main quest its like. peak time to be getting that conversation + the boost in approval which#akes all the difference between getting the interaction then and not getting it if you didnt let him kill the gur lmao
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Whenever i am told thangs abt the leech i just go. What an embarrassing person gosh
#iykyk#god damn#The stupidest and most oblivious person ive ever came in relatively close contact with /gen. With several ppl who know them irl agreeing#i kind of feel bad they dont even realize this but not gonna bother myself with it its just me going damn#unfortunate#apparently they are under impression im a lurker. one of their MANY projections but possibly the funniest/most pathetic one#i literally did not see their blog/crs blog since waaay back when we were still getting along#i have 0 reason to go in their spaces#last ive heard they were obsessively going thru tags on my posts day in and out#at work out of work#that makes ONE lurker in all this haha even crink knew to stop at some point LMAO#literally all i know is from ppl telling me soz m8#osmosis#just. the fact they believe ppl care enough to lurk on them is really funny in a sad way#ive been told they are paranoid abt one of their followers or something?#theyre nobody i know but stay paranoid ig#the assumption ppl would care enough#i was chortling while having old pellets read out for me#i would have to be insane to care abt what someone like that says#by which i mean an undiagnosed unmanaged shut in#quote /the universe hates them/#definitely nothing to do with them being a mess#fitting that they have an alter ego/sona that is just their bad traits concentrated#like yeah. why are we even upset LMAO#projection town on their end allllllll the way it just screams /unwell and out of the loop/#they dont know... ajajaj...#night was not happy abt that post no surprise there#YES they are enabling infidelity yes they are inserting themself. was supposed to stay in the house a few months and now. poor night jfc#nine months to go is too long#im so glad she told them
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