#which again it isn't something so private that we now have A Serious Problem

[woolandcoffee]

Sigh.

[lesbianchemicalplant]

transmisogyny-exempt people do the most insane handwringing about how trans women who say ‘egg’ are Predatory Toward GNC Men and Assuming Genders and Reinforcing Gender Roles or whatever (this is just the TERF argument that trans women are nefariously trying to Convert gnc cis men)

whether you like it or feel Uncomfy or not, the fact is, the following is a very common experience for trans women:

a trans woman makes a friend who at the time self-describes and presents as a man; who seems to be seeking out as many trans women as they can (maybe surrounding themself with trans women if they're able to and/or following their trans women friends around like a duckling); who seems somewhat uncomfortable around men and especially with being treated by them as a Fellow Man; who is very aware of and interested in trans issues; who maybe talks or asks about various aspects of transitioning; and maybe has other interpersonal mannerisms that don't mean anything on their own and don't even necessarily mean anything in context. but yes, then that friend eventually comes out as a trans woman to the trans women she's close to, maybe after having only recently come out to herself

this is something I've personally experienced: this is roughly what I did when I was starting to figure things out (seeking out trans women online). this is also basically how one of my close RL friends made friends with me, and eventually came out to me. I was one of the first trans women she met in real life

and yes, before my friend came out to me, I did Wonder. I didn't assume, and I didn't do anything to push or prod, because it wouldn't have been helpful: it would likely have just made her uncomfortable. I figured the best thing I could do in any case was just being there, and being worthy of trust to talk about anything when/if she wanted to

(said friend is actually now in a similar position wrt one of her siblings, who has talked about how it would be better to be a woman and wear women's clothing among other things, but for now still self-describes as a guy. We'll See)

and yes, sometimes when trans women are in this position—having a friend like this whom we wonder about—we might refer to having a friend who may be a closeted trans woman or an ‘egg’ when in private conversation with other trans women, or when speaking in an anonymous and non-identifying context. this isn't outing anyone, and doing so is not Assuming Someone's Gender or Trying To Convert A Man or Force A Gender On Someone

we might also refer to ourselves in the past tense as having been “eggs” when talking about our experiences growing up, figuring things out, getting to know other trans women, questioning and coming out to ourselves, etc. (again, I myself did seek out other trans women online etc. before I knew I was trans—again, this is all pretty common!)

we are not hunting down any cis man who enjoys baking or whatever and forcibly declaring them to be an Egg. we do not have the social power to do this even if we wanted to, which we don't. even if you did encounter such a hypothetical trans woman, she would be annoying on an interpersonal level, but again, probably not in a position to commit real harm. and if YOU were to fixate on and rage about The Nefarious Trans Women Assuming People's Genders, that would say infinitely more about you than about us or about some purported Serious Social Problem with the term “egg”

any transmisogyny-exempt person who has a problem with any of this is welcome to eat shit

[chaosandthe-deadblog]

hi i’m that one person who was upset about a sonadow sex joke you made. let me preface by saying i’m not here to argue or scare you but to apologize.

you don’t have to respond to this at ALL i just saw your blog name and felt guilty for hurting you.

im sorry about upsetting you and reacting the way i did. i still think its eugh and everything. but i just get upset when people make jokes about that with characters previously stated to be minors because of personal trauma and people sexualizing me as a kid and just morals in general. of course i know that i can’t control how people enjoy their stuff, and i know it’s going to exist regardless. but i want to at least know if who im interacting with is someone i don’t want to talk to due to being a proshipper or whatever stuff like that.

i wasn’t trying to ‘cancel’ you or anything. i was upset and said something in the moment. i’m sorry. i should have just unfollowed and moved on. i should’ve saw the human i knew behind the screen but what i could only think of was a random person i didn’t know. i’m really sorry.

well, anon, i accept your apology. but also i dont. so let's take this one by one, okay?

first of all. you're still wrong, and i'm still angry.

it wasnt a "sex joke", i was commenting on a uquiz someone else made, because i found the sheer fact that sonadow of all ships was included in that quiz to be really funny. not to mention, the uquiz was based on statistics from ao3, and i guessed the correct answer by just knowing how shipping culture works. i thought this was funny. you know, people are allowed to find suggestive humor funny, even if you're uncomfortable with it, anon.

but i'll humor you. lets say i was doing the things i got accused of doing. big deal. i don't think you're wrong for being upset, much less for being uncomfortable, but one: could've settled this over dms, two: not everyone is you. not everyone is uncomfortable. not everyone cares so much. i didn't give that joke more than two seconds of thought, you clearly did, and i don't think you're wrong for that, i think it wasn't my problem.

secondly, and this will sound horrible, but (like i said) your discomfort isn't something i (the people running that oc poll, and my followers, by the way) needed to know about. i hear you, anon, and i'm sorry that all that happened to you. i understand the discomfort. but, like i said, we could've settled this in private, you could've at least told me which mutual you were, and no one else had to know.

third: i am not a proshipper, and i don't appreciate that you're still calling me gross, by the way. this isn't an apology if you're not accepting you were wrong. i'll humor you again and say that i was doing what you say i was doing: it is not that serious to me, and i don't like being called gross for something that is just plain, morally neutral weird (not good, not bad, neutral weird)

and fourth: thank you for at least recognizing what you should've done. however you didn't do that. from what i understand, based on what happened shortly after your anon, you went to the person running that sonic oc poll (which, whatever, i was losing anyway), and you lied about what i was doing to get me kicked out. good on you for realizing that was wrong. but you know, i'm still angry. im banned from many fandom events now because you couldn't just unfollow me. so i'm glad you realized it was wrong, i accept your apology, but i'm still very much angry with you.

i'm glad you're sorry, i'm glad you're recognizing i'm a human being (okay?) and i'm glad you at least tried to apologize. don't call me gross, apologize for real, and next time don't do this to someone through tumblr anon over whats essentially a common ocurrence on the sonic fandom, and every other fandom

(by the way, even if we weren't mutuals, you shouldnt do something like this to "a random person you don't know" either, but what do i know right? and "because of my trauma" isn't an excuse, because by that logic you also generated trauma in me, because now i'm fucking paranoid about everything i fucking post. i can thank you for that.)

have a nice day.

by the way

[donnerpartyofone]

We are now entering the holiday season, more or less, which starts early for my family due to a birthday, and I wish this didn't fill me with ambivalence. I like my family, they have interesting things to say, they're great hosts, they can create an idyllic sort of environment; but meanwhile, there is the exhausting obligation to somehow promote oneself, to find something to take to market, and I don't have anything like that and it causes problems. I'm the only person in my family who isn't outrageously accomplished. I had all the same opportunities as everyone else, it was just never going to happen, I'm not good enough. Which sounds self-pitying but honestly it only sounds that way because our ears are conditioned to hear it as some kind of criminal admission of an unacceptable circumstance, instead of a casual acknowledgement of a completely normal circumstance. I think I would feel a great, cathartic relief if it were socially acceptable to just concede that you're a loser, that you're not going to amount to anything due to personal limitations. I mean, I feel like this should not be controversial actually, but it seems to make people feel frightened and confused and angry and if you even come close to saying "This is about it for my personal potential, nothing really worked out"; anyone who hears this will immediately go to great pains to try to force you to take it back, even if they believe it themselves.

I think this might be more true than usual in my family. I think they're embarrassed to know me, but admitting such a thing could make anybody feel like a bad person even though they shouldn't, they have a right--but to avoid feeling guilty (about something they shouldn't feel guilty about), there has to be this endless, exhausting game of make-believe where we all pretend to like me and to be interested in what's going on with me. So I have to like "bring something to the table", I can't just say I have nothing going on; I have to describe one of my dumb little hobbies that I kind of just nominally get paid for once in a while, and they don't understand what it is or what is the context or why any normal person would care, is so I have to describe it in a lot of boring detail, and then by the time I finally get through clarifying what the service/product is everyone's eyes are totally glazed over but they still have to find the energy to respond as if they are somehow impressed. And then the next time it comes up, we have to do the whole entire process over again because no one ever remembers what I said because they didn't really get it the first time, and it's really something they wouldn't even have to know about if it weren't for me, and it's at least as exhausting if not more so.

Recently I tried out a strategy of just saying less. I thought that if I just clammed up and didn't draw attention to myself, then that would put everybody at ease. (Asking other people about themselves only gets me so far, they always seem a little annoyed, like when you're trying to explain fashion to your uncool aunt or something) Sometimes it's like I'm not really there anyway; when I got engaged they threw a dinner for me, and there was about twenty minutes of discussing the wedding before the rest of the evening was devoted to someone's restored, vintage BMW and the drama of where to park such a beautiful and valuable object. Then there was the birthday outing where nobody asked me any questions, the whole afternoon was devoted to someone else's brand new Audi, which distraction prevented them from attending a super important professional event I had actually-on my birthday. The deflection to someone's fancy car whenever I require attention has become a private joke between me and my spouse, who frankly I sometimes think they are not nice enough to because he's married to me. He's an interesting person with a serious career that tells him a lot about how the world works, but sometimes I think they kind of see him as another stunted child because marrying me reflects poorly on him.

Which could totally be a projection on my part, but anyway. The point is I tried out my policy of only speaking when spoken to, or at least not saying anything personal, and everything indicated that this should have worked out, but it seemed to just make people even more mad at me. Admittedly there was an extenuating factor, that someone's famous friend came over and immediately challenged me to say that I was a professional writer like everyone else, and when I confessed that I was just unemployed, he kept trying to put words in my mouth about how successful I must be in some other way, and it was mortifying for me but more importantly it was mortifying for him that I couldn't reward this behavior. Meanwhile, another relative asked me exactly one question about myself--a career question--and when I didn't have an answer, that was the end of all conversation until we were all departing and she accused me of refusing to commune with her even though she missed me and was dying to talk to me. I don't really know what I'm supposed to do.

I feel the need to defend these people. I'm certain it's true that they care about me in that deep-down, fundamental, blood ties way. That's a lot more than many people get from their families. And it's mostly true that they have not been openly hostile or insulting; I mean this is absolutely not true historically, some pretty fucked up things have been said to my face and in front of groups, but this hasn't happened in long enough that I think it's right to try to let it go. In some ways it would be easier if everything were just bad enough that we could all give each other the finger and part ways. What I'm grappling with is this feeling that if I don't work really hard, I'm going to become estranged, which I think would be bad both spiritually and strategically, if you have a family who doesn't actively harm you I think you should keep them around for many different reasons. But it's an established thing that if one family member pulls away, there's a loving conspiracy to draw them back, whereas if I seem to become a little distant, I'm going to get accused of something, like even in writing sometimes. So I have to be on my best behavior all the time, and I have to keep playing this game where I pretend that big things are happening for me and I have to do a whole marketing presentation on this total lie even if everyone is bored to death and not a little embarrassed. I don't know, I guess it's nobody's fault. There's no way we would ever know each other if everybody weren't forced to be related to me, I might as well try to make it easier for them. It's just hard because there is nothing about me that would make it ACTUALLY easy for them to be associated with me, so I'm dutybound to kind of just laboriously smile and make shit up for the rest of my life in order to keep clinging to the fringes of our existence.

It just sucks because I love the fall, I love Halloween and Thanksgiving and Christmas and New Year's. And it's not NEVER fun to be with my family. But the season I love is just tainted with this anxiety because it's like illegal to admit that you're just sort of a loser, and my family could never admit that they just basically kind of dislike untalented, unsuccessful people, because there's a cultural prejudice that that's a moral failing--which it isn't, it's just a personal preference, but I guess we're all saddled with the same baggage. Everything would be so much more relaxed and intimate if we could openly accept the way things really are, but it's definitely never going to happen. Stress.

[janiedean]

Hallmark-inspired J/B AU crack because... well, it's been a while since the last AU crack and tbh I was kinda starting to miss it! And also, I recently ended up rewatching this silly comedy from 2012 called Undercover Bridesmaid.

So, the movie is about this tall, blonde bodyguard from a private security agency. Some rich Texan businessman hires her because his daughter, who's about to get married, has been getting death threats from an anonymous harasser and will most likely make herself an easy target during the ceremony. The daughter is a ditzy airhead chasing dreams of romance and a perfect wedding and won't take the threats as anything but a joke in poor taste, so calling off the whole thing for now is not an option, and neither is having a bunch of big menacing guys in suits shadow her every movement on her big day... so the rich Texan has no choice but to hire the one female bodyguard the firm can offer and task her to befriend his daughter so she'll want her as one of her bridesmaids, allowing her to do her job without being noticed.

Which actually does happen, to the point the Texan's daughter actually starts to consider the bodyguard a dear friend, and even the bodyguard, a very strict and closed-off type, starts warming up to her. She also starts to warm up to one of the groom's friends, though, which is a problem because she can tell he's hiding a secret and that makes him a possible suspect...

Ofc, there's lots of shenanigans, including the obvious "woman who's not very girly at all and is very serious and tough gets stuck with a bunch of other women who love all things girly, mushy, and romantic" humor and "everyone is hiding a secret but no, nothing to do with the death threats" subplots. And ofc, the bodyguard has a tragic backstory where she was left at the altar by a shitty boyfriend so now she hates all weddings...

Eventually, things come to a head on the wedding day, when the groom's friend decides to confess his feelings to the bodyguard while also coming clean about his secret (he isn't some rich law graduate like he's been telling everyone, he's actually still doing a bunch of odd jobs to hopefully earn enough to start studying law some day soon)... but to hear him out, the bodyguard forgets her duty for a moment and lets him draw her away from the bride and her friends, and that's when someone tries to shoot the bride.

She runs back in time to prevent anyone from actually getting hurt, but the rich Texan is beside himself with rage and fear and starts berating her in front of everyone for walking off with some guy instead of doing her job, blowing her cover, firing her and telling her she'll replace her with one of her other colleagues (and to hell with "perfect wedding" appearances), and demanding to know if she's made any progress in finding out who's trying to harm his daughter all at the same time. The bride feels hurt because she thinks her new friend was only pretending to like her as part of her job, the groom's friend is hurt because he told her a secret he felt ashamed about when she was hiding from him that she was on the lookout for a whole assassination attempt, and... pressured by the rich Texan and unable to explain herself in the ensuing chaos, the bodyguard lets slip that she briefly suspected the groom himself but apparently his secret was just that he was slinking away with some other woman. Only to eventually resist the temptation out his genuine love for the bride, sure, but again... angry shouty fathers and people going "wait, you're a bodyguard!?" everywhere and words not coming out like they should.

Dejected and feeling like she's failed on all fronts, the bodyguard still sends the bride a video showing the groom not actually doing anything with the other woman. After receiving it, the bride forgives him and doesn't call the wedding off, just postpones it, but when she tries to call the bodyguard (presumably to say something like "I'm sorry I reacted so badly, I hope we actually are friends, will you please come to the wedding anyway?") she doesn't even pick up.

So the groom's friend figures out what's going on and goes to visit her at her firm, where's training in some kind of gym room, and there's an actually quite sweet scene where he puts on boxing (?) gloves and lets her punch them again and again to finish exercising (and probably also to vent, she needs it) while he tells that he should have understood right away that she was only hiding stuff from him out of necessity, that nothing's changed between them, and that she should let herself free to feel and to care for and be cared for by other people instead of trying to keep everyone at arm's length like she's been doing ever since the "left at the altar" thing.

He finally convinces her to show up at the wedding, not as a bodyguard but as a real bridesmaid and friend of the bride this time... and, obviously, she ends up figuring out exactly who the real culprit is (it's another bridesmaid, whose family business had been cheated out of some lucrative deal by the rich Texan) and stopping another murder attempt in the nick of time.

As you may have already figured out (XD) I'm thinking of Brienne as the bodyguard and Jaime as the groom's friend. Her initial uneasiness around the other bridesmaids would be easy to translate into her comparing herself to a bunch of conventionally pretty girls in very feminine dresses, and her dislike for weddings might come from The Bet either going WAY too far and somehow ending in a fake proposal or from her learning about it at a wedding where she naively agreed to come as some jerk's plus one. And his secret could be that he's been cut off by Tywin and now he's struggling to make his way in the world all on his own unlike all the other rich people in the wedding party. The boxing scene would, ofc, still happen. ;)

I'm less sure about the bride and her father, but I was thinking... Sansa and Ned, maybe? She'd be a lot less of a "spoiled sweet" airhead than her movie counterpart, but she could be marrying Sandor after getting out of a bad relationship with Joffrey and too anxious to put the past behind her and "seal the deal" on a brand new start to think clearly, making her more romantic and dreamy side resurface. While Ned would just need to be less of a rich ass (really, it would only require a bit of a different attitude and a different motivation for the villain), but he could still lose his cool with Brienne right after witnessing a murder attempt on his daughter.

Sandor as the groom, too, would need a different subplot than "he has a bit of a wandering eye but really he's loyal"... but the "other woman" could turn out to be someone he met in a support group for victims of familial abuse and only there to offer emotional support in case all the wedding preparations and the tension risked making him freak out in front of Sansa's family.

OKAY OKAY OKAY SO I HADN'T MANAGED TO CHECK TUMBLR UNTIL TODAY AND I WENT LIKE WOW HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME THIS IS THE PERFECT PLOT TO FIND IN MY INBOX SKLFJGDLJKDJLKSGLJDGKLJKGDGLJDKGJDKLJKDGLKGD OH MY GOD THIS IS AMAZING AND I WANNA WATCH THIS MOVIE NOW but in all seriousness your casting sounds good to me and tbf if jaime had to be the groom's friend then idk if anyone but sandor cut it and sansa/ned would work perfectly (ALSO I WANT THE BOXING SCENE NOW I'm gonna find a download for this thing pronto) I mean you can just make ned less of an asshole and the fake bridesmaid can be someone who wants to fuck ned's ethical business over I mean ngl could be roose who is in the board for ned's company and wants to take over so he thinks having sansa murdered and framing sandor would make him step down (???) could be an idea or could be cersei who hates sansa bc she broke up with joffrey and it had a bad public repercussion and is prob not even invited but brienne could just do her investigations and find out (DUNNO IF ANY OF THIS SOUNDS GOOD TO YOU LMK)

and ngl for sandor I like what you said but it also might be that in this version after Shit Happened™ his sister ended up adopted while he ended up in the system and she looked him up/found his info and wanted to reconnect so he's meeting her but without telling anyone bc he's not sure/he has trauma/he doesn't want her to end up in a mediatic mess bc he's not exactly marrying a no one and she's actually offering emotional support and when brienne finds out she's like okay sure you're good you say when you feel like it (??) but yeah I love everything about this I'm off to find a torrent THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS GENIUS

[mypoisonedvine]

𝙧𝙞𝙫𝙖𝙡𝙧𝙮 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙧𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙡𝙧𝙮 || niki lauda x reader x james hunt

𝙨𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙮 : flirting with james shouldn’t have been a problem, because you and niki weren’t even that serious anyways, right?  well, it turns out you are serious, but it also turns out not to be quite the problem you expected.

𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩 : 2.8k

𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨 : smut (threesome, dubcon (slight), oral f and m receiving, dp/anal, spitroasting, slight degradation/dumbification, overstimulation, spanking), touch of angst, possessiveness, niki being mean (guys, it’s niki), pwp

based on a request by @creme-bruhlee which was based on a thing I told him I was working on which I wasn’t actually working on yet but then I casually wrote in one sitting when I was supposed to be doing my sleepover gah

                       You certainly didn’t like James Hunt.  After all, you were all but contractually obligated to hate him in solidarity with your boyfriend and his biggest rival, Niki.

But you did appreciate James— for his undeniable talent as a driver, and for what he brought out in your boyfriend.  Not just on the track, but at times like this as well.

It started rather innocently, at least as innocent as any press event could be.  Niki wore you proudly on his arm, for most of the interviews: you knew that a lot of this for him was simply a publicity ploy to improve his image, but it honestly didn’t bother you that much since it was partially for publicity on your part as well (you had your own career to advance, after all).

What bothered him, though, was when James started to suddenly chat you up, undeniably flirty but just to the level that it could almost be construed as polite.

He waited until Niki was pulled away for an interview and stood just behind the camera, asking you a million questions and finding dumb excuses to touch you: first it was something in your hair, then admiring your bracelet (Niki gave it to me, you told him; Twice now he’s shown that he has fine taste, James winked in reply) until he finally stepped closer and rested his hand on your lower back.

“Let me show you what a real driver can do, sweetheart,” he offered lowly, leaning in so close that his lips brushed against your temple, and you caught Niki leaving the interview suddenly in the corner of your eye.

“And let me show you what happens when you can’t keep your hands to yourself,” Niki interrupted, shoving James back off of you before hitting him square in the jaw.  You gasped, as did the many reporters and drivers watching, but soon Niki’s attention was turned back to you, fire in his glare.

“Hey, I was just trying to be personable—” James defended as he held his face in his hand, but Niki ignored him, grabbing you by the wrist and dragging you behind him out of the press tent.

“Looks like the infamous Hunt/Lauda rivalry has come to a bit of a head, possibly over Lauda’s girlfriend—” you heard one of the reporters explain to a camera, but soon the buzz faded to silence as Niki took you further away.

“Where are we going, Niki?” you asked nervously, trailing behind him as best you could.

“Somewhere private where you can learn your lesson,” Niki answered, making you swallow dryly.  He wasn’t the sort of person you wanted to be in trouble with.

He found an empty garage and all but tossed you inside, pinning you to the wall at each shoulder.  

“The fuck do you think you’re doing, letting Hunt put his hands on you like that?” he hissed.

“I didn’t let him, he just did it!” you defended.

“Then you tell him to stop!” Niki explained, exasperated.  “Instead of standing right there, right in front of my face and doing nothing!  You can’t imagine how it feels to see another man put his hands on you— and that man...”

You hadn’t realized he cared about that sort of thing; you hadn’t realized he cared about you that much.  “I’m sorry, Niki, it won’t happen again.”

“You’re right about that,” he hissed, “it won’t happen again because you’re going to bend over that toolbox and learn not to test me."

You opened your mouth to protest and yet you were already doing it, feeling your cheeks burn as he pulled your dress up and rubbed his calloused hands over your ass and thighs.

A yelp jumped from your mouth when he hit you, but your thighs clenched together, too. "Now would be a good time to start apologizing," he suggested coldly.

"Niki, baby, I'm so so sorr— ah!" you whined again when he hit you even harder, the sound of his skin on yours echoing around the garage.

"Do you want to flirt with him? Would you rather be his flavor of the week?" Niki interrogated.

"No! Just want you, I swear," you promised, biting your lip to hold back a moan when he hit you twice in a row.

"You'll have me," he promised. "You need to remember who you belong to."

If you weren't so desperate you would've probably protested to that language, but your panties were soaked from almost nothing at all and you were in no position to debate with him.

The sound of his uniform unzipping was like music to your ears, and you purred a little when he pulled your panties down your thighs slowly. "Are you enjoying this?" he realized. "It's supposed to be a punishment and still you're soaking wet. Is that for him or me?"

"You, Niki, fuck me, please," you whined, the sound shifting into a gasp as he pushed inside you roughly, a little too deep and a little too fast for how little you'd been prepared. It was usually some level of struggle to take him but this was a very new circumstance: now he was fucking you with a point to make, with a message to send. And you got that message loud and clear as he mercilessly pounded into you, nearly knocking over the toolkit you were bent onto. "Fffuck," you stammered, holding onto the aluminum for dear life while he grunted behind you.

"You can moan louder than that, no need to suppress yourself," he encouraged.

"They could hear us, they're not too far away—"

He spanked you again and you cried out, realizing he likely wanted them to hear you; he wanted those reporters to make sure everyone knew that you were his. "Tell them who's fucking you so good, hm? Tell them who you belong to."

"Niki," you sobbed, "yours, baby, I'm yours..."

Just then, the door to the garage swung open and you gasped at the sight of James Hunt. You tried to kick Niki away and cover yourself but he didn't budge— he didn't even stop fucking you, much to your humiliation.

"I'm a little busy here, James," Niki explained with a smug grin.

"I can tell— listen, if you're gonna make us all hear this, could you at least do it right?" James frowned. "Your girl has many talents but acting is not one of them."

"Are you saying this is a performance?" Niki realized.

"You'd be able to tell the difference if you'd ever heard a woman actually finish but with you, that's impossible," James laughed. "Smart move going from behind, though, spare her from having to look at—" James motioned to his face broadly— "this whole situation you have going on."

"If you think you can do better, Hunt, I'd love to see you try."

You started about a thousand questions but didn't finish any of them, and James grinned as he shut the door behind himself. "I told you I'd show you what a real driver can do, didn't I?" he addressed you, crossing the room to where Niki had you pinned down.

Before you could say anything (not that you knew what to say), James grabbed your hair and kissed you, not quite rough yet but completely dominating as his tongue slid over yours and tickled the roof of your mouth.

"You wouldn't be doing that if you knew where her mouth had been, James," Niki chuckled.

"That sort of shit doesn't bother me, Lauda," James explained once he'd broken his lips away from yours. "It's called confidence in my masculinity, look it up sometime. I know exactly what's been in her cunt, too, and I'm still gonna show her how a real man eats pussy."

You got a little nervous at the sound of that, but wetter as well.

Niki circled to face you, clutching your jaw and examining your expression carefully as James hungrily licked and sucked at your cunt.

"If you're going to eat her cunt then let me fill it with my come first, give you a little taste of victory, eh?" Niki joked, but James pushed him away and you whined slightly when your boyfriend's cock slipped out of you... but it was only a moment before James knelt behind you, swiping his tongue over your swollen bud and drenched opening as you purred.

"I hope your jaw isn't too sore, Hunt," Niki sneered.

"It's not," James assured with saccharine faux-sweetness before diving back in to taste you further.

James stopped to lean his head out to the side. "Think she likes the sound of that, Niki— she clenched down on my tongue real tight."

"If you come for him, you won't like what I'll do to you," Niki warned you harshly. "You won't sit right for a week, at least."

"Oh, I see," Niki smirked. "You want me to tear up that little ass... should've known, you have that look about you: the kind of girl who acts innocent in public but turns into a whore when the lights go out."

Yet again James caught you reacting to what Niki said, though this time he didn't need to announce it since your own moan gave you away.

"Go ahead and fuck her then, Hunt, and get her ass ready for me," Niki instructed. You were surprised when James obeyed, standing up and unzipping his uniform as well to start rubbing his cock over your dripping pussy.

"You want it, sweetheart?" James taunted. "Ask very nicely."

"Fuck me, James, please," you sighed, and he was much more gentle than Niki had been as he filled you, letting you savor every inch of his length.

"Sounds so lovely when you say my name like that, do it again," James demanded, slowly beginning to rock into you.

"James," you breathed, gasping when Niki pushed his cock against your lips; you could taste yourself on him and it turned you on even more.

"I think we can find a better use for your mouth than boosting James' ego, yes?" Niki groaned as he started to fuck your mouth, holding your head steady. "Certainly he doesn't need any more of that."

You moaned loudly around Niki's cock when James circled his finger around your tighter rim. The first knuckle pushed in and you felt your knees wobble. Then back out again, then to the second knuckle-- each twist of his finger he went a little deeper, he even went so far as to spit on your hole which made you choke from more than just Niki's cock down your throat.

"Your girl's gotta sweet little cunt, Niki," James groaned as he fucked you faster. "You should let your pit crew use her, too, give 'em a morale boost."

"Maybe I will if she doesn't behave for us today," Niki considered, weaving his fingers into your hair to start fucking your face more roughly.

Your legs threatened to give out with the way James was fucking you; your eyes rolled back in your head with a suppressed moan as Niki kept using your mouth.

Around the same time Niki pulled his cock out to rub it over your face, James pulled out to slap his swollen head on your clit.

Another finger pushed into your ass and you made a sound that you hardly recognized as your own. "If I had known you liked it up the ass so much, you would've never taken it anywhere else," Niki promised with a growl.

Once James decided both your holes were ready, they seemed to have no trouble at all manhandling you into the position they needed— surely it was the first time you'd ever seen them work together— and soon you found yourself balanced on James' lap while Niki found his place behind you.

"Do you think you can take us both, sweetheart?" James taunted as you felt both of them teasing your holes.

"Well, I've never been fucked by two massive dicks before," you admitted, "and you have big cocks, so..."

"I'll miss that wit of yours when you become a mindless, drooling fuckdoll in the next two minutes," Niki stated plainly.

It only took ten seconds.

Your hands weakly held onto James' shoulders as you bounced on top of him, moaning lowly as you were filled beyond what you thought possible. Niki had to hold your waist to help guide you, occasionally thrusting forward to fill your ass with every inch of him.

"Ah, fuck," you moaned, reaching beside you to grab Niki's forearm in an attempt to stabilize yourself.

James tore your dress down the front and latched onto your tits, sucking hard and even letting his teeth graze one nipple while Niki used his free hand to pinch the other.

Even when your eyes fell shut and your brain was totally empty, you could tell them apart just by touch. It was Niki sucking a mark on the side of your neck, but James grabbing a rough handful of your ass. It was Niki that reached around to rub your clit, but James that nibbled and sucked on your earlobe while whispering things so dirty that your face burned hot.

"We can both feel it when you come, do it again," Niki demanded just before your third hit you.

"Give us a good squeeze, sweetheart, wanna feel that cunt milk me," James agreed.

"I-I'm coming," you gasped as your head fell back, both of them laughing and cooing proudly.

"There she goes."

"Good fucking girl."

"Gets tighter every time."

You only regained your ability to tell who said what when you felt Niki's lips against your ear, his voice soothing your aching, quivering body. "You want to be full of come, don't you?" he presumed, and you nodded sleepily. "We'll fill you as deep as we can, and you need to keep it in you for the rest of the day."

"Yes, Niki," you agreed softly.

They picked up their pace and you felt like a ragdoll as they thrust into your limp body, chasing their highs as recklessly as always until you lost your voice from moaning so loud.

James finished first, though you imagined this was one race he would’ve preferred not to win.  He bit down on your shoulder as he filled you, hard enough to leave a mark which you knew would anger Niki when he realized it.

"Tell me who you belong to," Niki pleaded one last time, coming inside you the moment you answered "you, Niki."

And then it was just the three of you, standing there in a sweaty jumble of limbs, catching your breath and trying to process what had just occurred.

“Do you think we can get out of here without too many reporters seeing?” Niki asked James.

“I’m going to worry about getting out of the girl first, then the building,” James decided, and the two of them helped lift you onto your numb legs, your body slow to recover from the onslaught of sensations that had been forced on you this long.  If anything was more jarring than being filled by both of them, it was both of them pulling out at once.  Come leaked out of you from more places than you cared to admit, and since James had torn your dress, Niki gave you his uniform to wear which left him in only the undershirt and boxers he wore beneath.

“I can’t believe I’m getting your spunk on my uniform right now, Hunt,” Niki grimaced, making James laugh as he zipped himself back up.  Funny enough, he looked the most normal after all this of the three of you; maybe because he always had that ‘just had some freaky sex’ look about him.  You and Niki were a bit newer to the game, so you didn’t wear it as well, but honestly you thought he looked pretty cute with his curls all messed up from when you’d run your fingers through them.

“Well,” James announced with a puffed chest and proud smile, “next time you two are having a lover’s spat, give me a call and I’ll lend a hand or cock as needed.  But I think I’ll take my leave now.”

What do you say after something like that?  Apparently the answer is nothing, considering you just nodded slightly and Niki gave him an awkward wave as he disappeared out the door with the nonchalance as his arrival.

Plunged into silence, you glanced over at Niki who was already staring at you.  “So?” he asked.  “Was he better?”

“No,” you answered right away.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

Relief washed over you when he pulled you into an embrace and kissed your forehead; you couldn’t think of the last time he was so affectionate.  “Let’s get back to the track and find you a new dress, hm?” he suggested.  “One that James Hunt absolutely won’t get his hands on.”

[jaehyunzzmilk]

dinasty (part 2)

pairing: prince jaehyun x concubine reader

word count: 3.4 k

genre: Historical Mafia AU, smut, light angst

summary: after the perfect escape, you have to find a way to fit in your new life, leaving the past behind may seem easy when you're working for 4 princes and one of them is interested in you, right?

notes: hello again, part 2 is up and we have a new love triangle, thank you for liking the first part so much, and prepare for even more surprises

this doesn't have any relation to real facts and history, it's just pure fiction for entertainment purposes

warnings: violence, blood, cheating, unprotected sex, oral (female receiving)

main characters: jaehyun (prince), yuta (samurai, villain), ten (thai mafia, villain), kun (China's emperor warrior)

Reality - Part 2

Part 1 here

"- Nice tattoo!" the man says.

It was dark and his face was only visible through the moonlight.

You freeze, the man stays still looking at you like you were his prey.

You try to cover your body but your only reaction is to grab your stuff and run, praying he wasn't gonna come after you.

Arriving at your room, breathing heavily you try to think about what just happened. A guy like that had to be a prince or someone really important. Ms. Lee told you to be lowkey and on the first day you let a man see you naked in the bath area. "Whatever" You were just too tired to think, you didn't do anything wrong anyway, so you were gonna pretend that it didn't happen. The Korean Palace was gonna punish you for going to the wrong bath?

Suddenly you realize Kun's necklace isn't with you. "Fuck, I must have dropped there" but now it's too risky to come back and look for it so you decide to do that tomorrow. You lay down on your mattress and try to fall asleep.

-

Next morning Ms. Lee showed you the rest of the Palace, the kitchen and assigned your tasks. It was a lot of work and details, each of their meals had to be perfectly planned. They had someone even to taste the food before them so they know it's not poisoned.

"- I'm gonna be responsible for the King's meal and you're gonna be responsible for the four prince's meals."

-Four?

"- Yes, Taeil, Doyoung, Johnny and Jaehyun. Now you should prepare their tea, they always drink green tea in the morning."

While preparing the tea you wonder which one you saw at the bathing area and if you should tell Ms. Lee what happened yesterday.

You're walking with the trays to the dining place when you try to talk to her.

-Ms. Lee!

-"Yes"

-So yesterday...

You realize you still don't know much about Ms. Lee and even if Kun trusts her, you don't. Also you can't help but think that serving tea was much better than your life at the concubine's house, so you try quickly to think of something else to say.

-Well, yesterday… Before I met you… this man helped me at the harbor, he was wearing black clothes and had a samurai sword.

-"Stay away from him!" She turns at you. "They are dangerous, they will kill everything and everyone on their way, people you don't want to mess up with."

By Yuta's facial expression when you mentioned Ms. Lee's name you weren't surprised she said those words, you wonder why but she wasn't gonna be the one to give you the answers. Otherwise, you still weren't afraid of him, he was gonna be the last of your problems here.

-"Now let's get in there, first you bow and then you serve them the way I showed you, don't look at them in the eye and don't say anything." She says.

In silence, you enter the dining room along with the other servants behind you bringing the food plates and you stop in front of the tables on the floor where all the princes are. There are two on each side, the two oldest and the youngest, all of them are sitting on cushions, they all have long hair and are wearing beautiful hanboks.

-"Your highness, may I introduce you to your new servant 'y/n', she is my niece and she is gonna work with me in the kitchen from now on." Ms. Lee said while you bowed, you were still too nervous to look up and look at them. "Now, may we start with the tea." Ms. Lee turns to you and signs that you can go and serve them.

Holding the teapot you go to the first prince, the oldest, Taeil, he is very handsome, with his light brown hair, face delicate and mature at the same time. Slowly you pour the tea into the cup by his left, he doesn't do anything, just stays still looking down and you wonder if you did something wrong. On his right it's Doyoung, after you pour the tea he gives you a small nod which makes you feel calmer. He is also very handsome, shiny black long hair, perfect posture, he sure looks like a prince. On the other side, Johnny, you can feel he is looking at you, the first to say "thank you" after you pour the tea. His face is gorgeous, even if he is sitting down you can feel how tall and strong he is. And then, Jaehyun, the man from the bath. You freeze when he looks directly at your eyes, you try to stay calm and pour the tea but can't help but shake a little bit. He is the definition of perfection, he had perfect skin, perfect face, everything about him.

Jaehyun keeps staring at you even when you stand up and comes back to Ms. Lee side.

-"Seems like someone likes our new servant!" Johnny says laughing. The other boys look at him but Jaehyun remains silent and serious, still looking at you.

They give the first sip to their tea. Taeil stops and smells the cup.

-"Did someone… put ginger on the tea?" He asks.

Ms. Lee turns at you with her eyes wide open.

-"Did you put ginger when you were making the tea?" She says in a low voice. - Yes, that's how we usually drink it in China, I'm so sorry.

-"Don't..." Taeil says taking another sip "- From now on keep in that way". You see Jaehyun smirking with the corner of your eyes.

Your whole body relaxed, you felt like you were going to faint. Ms. Lee bows and tells them to excuse both of you. As soon as you enter the kitchen's door she grabs your arm.

-"You have no idea how lucky you were this time young lady, Taeil is the most picky to all the food we make, when he started speaking I thought I was gonna have a heart attack"

-Me too! But I'm so sorry, I swear I'm not doing anything again without asking you first.

-"Good! Now get back to work"

-

Later after you finish your schedule you come back to the bath area to look for Kun's necklace. You look everywhere but it's nowhere to be found.

-"Looking for this?" Jaehyun stops behind you holding your necklace.

You turn around and he comes closer to you.

-"I asked if you're looking for this?" Now he is inches from you.

-Ye- yes!

Jaehyun walks behind you and gently moves your hair to the side, putting the necklace on you.

-"Does that belong to your boyfriend?" He is so close it's almost he's whispering in your ears. You get goosebumps.

-Excuse me?

He smirks and comes back to look you in the eyes.

-"I fought in the war 2 years ago, I remember those from the chinese soldiers." He tilts his head to the side and looks at you from head to toe. "Or you did?"

-A prince fighting at the war?

-"And a very bloody one but yes... it would be a shame being a prince and let your people alone bring victory to your country"

-It does… belong to my boyfriend.

You hold your necklace in your chest.

-"And where is your precious boyfriend when a pretty face like you is talking to the enemy in another country?"

-It's complicated!

-"I have time!"

-Why? Do you want the full story to snitch on me?

-"Sweetie if I wanted to snitch you out I would have already!"

He was right.

-You wouldn't believe if I told you anyway!

-"Try me, I've seen it all"

You both sit on a stone beside the water.

-Well, when I was 9 my family was struggling, we didn't have food, money, anything… so my father sold me and my sister to a concubine's house. She went to a different house than mine so I never saw her again actually. But anyway after years of being a slave in all forms to that house I fell in love, to someone from the thai mafia, of course things got out of control, I was so dumb. When I tried to run away he found out and did this tattoo on me, I was in so much pain because I fell off the roof trying to run away that I didn't even felt the pain of the needle, I just stayed there, still. Then I met Kun, I fell in love again, he helped me to escape, and it worked.

-"And I assume that story of being Ms. Lee's niece is all lies."

-Yes! She helped to raise Kun and met his mother so it's the only reason she's doing this until he arrives.

-"Oh so he's coming."

-He works for the Emperor and he said they would kill both of us if he ran away, so he is gonna wait a little bit and ask to retire, he wants to do it the right way, then he'll join me.

-"If you allow me to say this but… I would never have let you to come alone, sometimes you don't have to do it the right way" He gets up and walks to the exit of the bath. "But I'm glad he did and we could meet"

You give a small smile with the corner of your lips.

-"Oh and by the way..." He turns at you. "The staff's bath area is on that way." He points to his left.

-I know now. Thanks.

He smiles and leaves.

-

Weeks passed and you were getting used to your new life. You were doing your job right, even making some different dishes from your hometown to the princes. Meanwhile you unexpectedly started spending time with Jaehyun. Since your conversation at the bath, you both got closer in a natural way. On every free time you had you spent time together, you mostly liked to walk on the garden because it was more private, he told you about his childhood, how he had to give up on so many things to be who the kings expected him to be, how he felt like he was on a prison his whole life and how he found joy on learning how to fight because it was the only way he had to express himself and not follow the rules. You were surprised at how wholesome he was, he made questions about your life in a way that you know he wasn't being just pity, he was interested in how other realities exist outside the Palace.

One afternoon Ms. Lee asked you to go to the flea market to buy fruit for the dinner's banquet. You went alone since now you were familiar with that.

Because of the summer there were a lot of different kinds of fruits on sale. You bought peaches because you knew Jaehyun likes it. After buying everything you needed you see some crowd gathering between the market, you approached them and notice some weird men you've never seen before. They were thieves. They were on their horses, destroying the sellers' stands, pushing everyone in their way, they even tried to put a food stand on fire. You saw a little kid who got lost from their parents and was crying right in the middle of the path where the thieves were. You run in his direction and catch him, putting him safely to the side of the road, when one of the men slaps your face "Get out of the way slut!"

The slap was hard so you fell on the ground when suddenly you see another group of men coming that way, they all had black clothes and katanas. The samurais. They were so fast, they fought the thieves in a blink of an eye. There are people running and dust everywhere, you feel a hand on you. "Let's get you out of here" you recognize the voice, Yuta holds you and takes you to a safe place.

-"Why every time I see you, you're in trouble? Didn't I tell you to not walk around alone?"

-I was just buying stuff at the market when they came out of nowhere.

-"You're bleeding, let me see your lips" Yuta takes the fabric that was covering his mouth and carefully wipes the blood on your lips.

-"You're gonna need ice if you don't want to get bruises..."

-Don't worry, I've had worse wounds! - You laugh.

-"You didn't tell me where you came from"

-You didn't either, and why are you doing this? Helping me when you told me to stay away?

-"Well you should!"

-I'm not afraid of you.

Yuta looks at you, his mysterious gaze turns into vulnerability.

-So, I will tell you my story if you tell me yours! - You say.

-"Years ago the king had a deal with Osaka’s emperor, since he traveled there and they proposed to do an alliance and protect each nation together, but when the war happened and the emperor asked for the samurais to fight on their side here in Korea. We came and it was all a trap, a lot of us died, the emperor stole our ships and made all his people be afraid of us spreading lies, that we were dangerous. Since we couldn’t come back home we settled ourselves here, but the funny thing is every time the small villages are in danger, like what you saw today, it’s us who come first to help them. You asked me why I saved you, where I came from, we take care of everyone, no matter what."

-I'm sorry!

-"Now your turn, what’s your dark pass?"

-Apparently like you I was also a victim of the war in my country, but other than having a sword and fighting I was just a concubine trapped in a house for so many years, let’s say I just involved myself with the wrong people and ran away.

-"It’s called a katana… the sword. And maybe I can teach you how to fight." He smiles.

-Me?

He gives you the sword.

-It's much lighter than I thought.

-"Careful, it's lighter but the blade is gonna be the sharpest of all swords. Here... You must hold like this!" He took your hands and taught you how to hold the sword, carefully he showed you some self defense moves.

-"Now if someone ever tries to slap your face again, you do this..." Yuta grabs your wrists and pins you agains't a tree, you can't move obviously, he is so close to you and you feel the sexual tension building.

-"Get away from her!" You hear a familiar voice screaming. It's Jaehyun.

Jaehyun gets off his horse, he was mad, you never saw him like that. You jump in front of Yuta.

-No wait! He saved my life! - You scream.

-"What? Y/n do you know who he is? He is a murderer." Jaehyun looks at you.

-"If you arrived 10 minutes earlier you could have joined us but the little prince was busy at his Palace right?" Yuta provokes him.

-"That's enough!" Jaehyun comes closer but Yuta doesn't even flinch.

-Please Jaehyun, let's go!

You grab his arm and take him away from Yuta.

- "This doesn't end here bastard!" - Jaehyun spits at Yuta's direction.

-

You come back to the Palace with Jaehyun and he takes you to the bath area.

He is sweating, you could see his veins popping because of how mad he was.

- Jaehyun please, everything is alright, you need to calm down!

- "No it's not, look at you, you're hurt" he grabs your face and touches your lip with his thumb.

- It's ok now, I was at the market when some thieves arrived, I was protecting a little kid who was gonna get hit by their horses, they got mad because I was in the way but I swear it was nothing and Yuta helped me and everyone in there!

- "What? How do you know his name?"

- When I arrived from China he saw me at the harbor, I was so weak from the trip he helped me and even took me to Ms. Lee! I don't care about your old family issues, he helped me and that's all.

- "I'm sorry I'm just… the Palace guards heard the thieves were at the market and when I knew you were there I got my horse and went after you, I just couldn't let anything bad happen to you y/n!"

He grabs your face with both of his hands and kisses you. You try to push him but still can't open your eyes and break the kiss completely "Jaehyun we shouldn't..."

- "If you don't want it then tell me to stop" your heart is beating so fast, you swallow hard and look up at Jaehyun, "I know I'm not the only one feeling this" He says kissing you hard again.

He is right. "Touch me" you say, grabbing his hands and placing them on your breasts. When he is caressing his hands on your breast he removes your necklace, dropping it on the ground. He unties your dress and slides the fabric until your lower body, he is on his knees in front of you and he passes his hands on the back of your thighs until your butt and kisses your thighs slowly. He keeps eye contact with you and licks your clit, you moan and grabs his hair in response to his tongue going faster.

In your head it felt so wrong because you were in love with Kun, but Jaehyun made you feel so needy, mind and body.

Jaehyun gives a hard lick on your clit and makes his way up to your stomach leaving a tray of kisses until your breasts, he sucks one nipple while his other hand and flicks the other one. He gets up and kisses you, the kiss was so wet, for a moment you forget that anything else exists while he kisses you hard, licking and sucking your bottom lip. He takes off his clothes, his hard dick slaps on his toned abs, pre cum leaking over his tip. Jaehyun lifts you up "Let's go inside" taking you to one of the hot tubs.

When you felt the heat of the water on your body, the feeling of pleasure and lust took over you, Jaehyun pulled you down onto his lap and gave you another kiss, you wrapped your arms around his neck when you feel his tip on your core. "Oh my god" you scream while his hands holding your waist puts you down until his whole length was inside of you. The feeling was so different, you got a harder friction because of the water and you start moving up and down to get used to his size. Jaehyun's shoulders and biceps tense while his cock is stretching you out. You bounce on him screaming in pleasure, body trembling as he helps you to move faster.

He was pushing all the way into you, hitting your g-spot. You arch your back and moan his name, clenching every time he enters you. You're almost out of breath when he sucks your neck and presses his thumb against your clit. "Jae, I'm gonna..." you can see he is close as well as he sucks your neck even harder and moves his finger faster. You scream when you feel your orgasm, your arching pussy made his cock tighter while he couldn't hold it anymore and released into you as well.

You both stay in the water for a bit recovering from the climax, he pulls you to his chest and you close your eyes.

-Am I dreaming?

-"I think the reality right now is better than your dreams."

"Reality" you thought, back at your own senses you couldn't help but be disappointed at yourself. Because of you Kun was risking his own life to help you to run away and now you're with the prince of the place he arranged you to work for. Maybe you were just a filthy concubine, maybe you deserved everything they did to you, even your tattoo. You roll your body and rest your head at the border of the hot tub, a tear coming out of your eye.

-

Part 3 coming soon

[falloutjay]

Wait we can request more than once? Okay then... I wish for Craig x Insecure! Reader (and also kind of x Tweek). So basically we get into a relationship with Craig, at first our personalitiy from very cheery and everything is peachy keen at first.

But then Craig starts ignoring us or shrugging us off, thats when we start being insecure and start thinking dark things like: what did I do wrong? Is there someone else? Am I that annoying?.

So trying to be progressive with her life, we take a job at Tweek coffee, (also sidenote everyone noticed our change in behavior and were worried, but didn't know how to ask how). So Tweek becomes the brave soul to ask us what's wrong. And we spill our problems out to him, Tweek doesn't know what to do but gives us a shoulder to cry on , few weeks roll by, and we find we have alot in common with him, so we start hanging out with him, almost completely forgetting about Craig. (It's up to you if you want Tweek to gain feelings for us)

By this time, Craig has started to notice and gets in the same position as we were (although more jealous than insecure), it isn't until a girl makes a comment about how she'd leave Craig too if he treated her like that, does Craig connect the dots and apologizes, they compromise their relationship and try to be a better couple and be peachy again (or you could do another ending where Tweek goes 'Treat you better' and fights for us).

I'm so so so sorry that I took so long! I just really wanted to take my time on this and really get into it, since I love the request! <3

I'm also sorry that Tweeks route is shorter but hey, at least we can choose which of the two deserves our love. :)

Thank you for being so patient and requesting! <3

_____________________________________

Craig Tucker x Insecure!Reader X Tweek Tweak

The sun on your skin felt wonderful. There is nothing better to do, than to hang out outside on a sunny, warm, and beautiful day in South Park.

To your luck your relatively new boyfriend Craig asked if you wanted to hang out with his friends and him when they would go to Starks Pond. Naturally, you said yes, getting finally a chance to also hang out with his friends.

While the guys were busy playing catch with a ball, you and Bebe, Clyde's on/off Girlfriend sat on the picnic blanket that she bought along.

It was also the first time you hung out with her and honestly, you were happy to basically get to know all these different people.

Bebe was a ray of absolute sunshine, and her boyfriend was the funniest dork you had ever seen.

Token was a more serious guy but oh so nice to you as well. Tweek and Jimmy were nice too and the quieter ones of the bunch.

"So... You and Craig huh?" Bebe asked you and you finally preyed your eyes from the black-haired boy away.

"Yeah. I was surprised when he asked me out." You laughed and Bebe did so too.

"How come?"

"I don't know. Kinda thought maybe I was out of his league. I'm not the most popular person around school and most people don't know me. Unlike you guys. You and Stans Friends are basically famous."

"That's only because of all the weird shit that sometimes happens around here." You nodded.

“So, how is he?” Bebe continued her questioning and you thought about it for a second before answering.

“Honestly, he’s a real sweetheart. Totally not like you would imagine him to be when you don’t know him too well.”

“That sounds so cute.” Bebe said dreamingly.

Your conversation was disrupted by a ball flying towards you. It landed just a few feet away from the blanket you and Bebe were seated on and Craig came sprinting.

He smiled when he picked up the ball and came closer to you.

“Sorry for that. I think Token was distracted by your beauty.” Bebe giggled in the background and you had the widest smile possible on your face.

“No problem. But I think you need to tell Token I’m taken then. By the prettiest boy around the school.” Now Bebe rolled her eyes.

“Ahh, to be in love like that again.” Now Craig couldn’t contain his laughter. He looked over to where Clyde was standing and obviously waiting for him to bring their ball back.

“Go back. They are waiting for you.” You said, pointing over to the boys. Craig nodded, but quickly pressed a kiss onto your lips, before sprinting right back to his friends.

 It was a beautiful day that was always on your mind. Now more than ever. Recently Craig had been rather cold to you and you really had no idea why.

He simply became less and less affectionate, when you would do something together, he barely talked, and he generally seemed changed.

He was angrier, cold, and seemed distant. It hurt you a lot, but talking to him about it was impossible, since he would just not admit that something changed.

It started getting to you. It poisoned your heart and mind that he was behaving in such a way towards you.

Maybe…Maybe he was seeing someone else... But no. Craig wouldn’t do that…Would he? Maybe he just realized you're annoying but didn’t want to break up.

“H-Hey Y/N!” Jimmy called out to you.

You waited for him to walk up to you since you were getting books for the weekend out of your locker. When he was finally next to you, he seemed giddy.

“I was wo-wondering if yo-you’d like to help TimTim and m-m-me with a project?” He asked, a pleasant smile on his face while he waited for your answer.

That smile turned into a frown when you shook your head.

“Sorry, I think I will just stay at home this weekend. I'm not feeling too well…” You lied, hoping Jimmy would not see through your fake smile.

Of course, he saw right through it, but he didn’t know what to do. None of your friends did. They all noticed how different you had become, how you smiled less and less and seemed more in thought.

They weren’t sure what to actually do, or how to help, so they just hope that you would maybe come to them and talk about it.

“Oh o-okay. No problem.” Jimmy said, and you could clearly hear that he was hurt, but he already continued walking.

You starred after him, wishing you weren’t so complicated. You felt like you kept only hurting everyone around you. With a deep sigh, you closed your locker and shouldered your backpack.

“Maybe…Maybe I need to change something…” you mumbled while walking towards the school’s entrance.

Craig had football training anyway, so it’s not like anyone was waiting for you, or that you had any desire to talk to anyone.

Someone hesitantly, you pulled out your phone and went onto Craig's contact.

“Hey, you got time this weekend? <3”

The least you could keep doing is trying you told yourself, even if you felt more and more like an idiot. A few minutes later you got an answer from him.

“Sorry, no time. Maybe next weekend.”

You wondered how many times he had said that by now. It felt like a million times.

Were you really that horrible that he couldn’t stand you anymore?

That it was too much to give you a merciful breakup instead of keep dragging this to the inevitable? And yet you also refused to break up with him.

There still was this small hope that maybe he would come around, see he was being a dick, and change his ways.

You loved him a lot.

And whenever you thought about breaking up, your heart ached. It was a horrible situation for you. And you wished you could escape it.

 “Okay, Y/N. I think that’s all you need to know. If you have any more questions, you can ask our son, Tweek when he will arrive. He got a doctor’s appointment today, otherwise, he will be here before you. He’s weird but nice.”

“Eh…Mister Tweak, I know him, we got to the same school and sometimes meet up.” You said, raising an eyebrow.

Mister Tweak, your new employer, simply smiled. You sometimes weren’t sure if he actually listened.

He was an odd fella, but you were just happy to have a little side job, that gave you okay money and had good hours.

You were looking around the shop in your new Tweeks Bros. apron when the door flung open. Tweek stepped into the shop, rambling about god knows what, and took his backpack off.

He stopped dead in his tracks when he laid eyes on you.

“Y-y-you applied here?” He questioned, seeming genuinely surprised.

You and Tweek didn’t hang out that much. He and Jimmy were little busy bees and therefore weren’t at every hangout, unlike Token, Clyde, and Craig.

“Yeah, I thought I…Might need some change or something like that.”

Richard Tweak clapped his hands and proclaimed: “Good, you two seem to get along. Then I will go home. Have a great first day, Y/N!” Tweek and you watched his father leave.

“So…What happened to the well-known fact that your father is a cheapskate and hires no one to save money?” You asked.

“My mother u-urged him to hire someone so that he can be home more. No idea how she convinced him.” Tweek smiled awkwardly, as so did you.

You never noticed before how little you had talked to the twitchy blonde.

Tweek walked behind the counter where you were and also took his apron.

“My dad already explained the basics?” He questioned to which you nodded. “Good, because honestly, I-I suck at explaining things.”

You loved Tweeks smile, and it involuntarily made you smile too.

“Well, I hope this job will get my mind off things.” You mentioned absentmindedly and the blonde cocked his head to the side.

He would love to ask what going on, but he felt awkward. Like it wasn’t his place to ask. And yet in a short-lived moment of bravery, he asked: “Yo-You’re... alright?” His anxiety shortly piped up, making him scared that maybe you didn't appreciate being asked if you're okay and that he already messed up with you.

You let out a deep sigh, the fake smile appearing once more.

“Yeah, don’t worry about it.”

“I feel like you’re lying about it.” Tweek wanted to slap his hands over his mouth, felt incredibly surprised that it just came out of his mouth and he immediately mumbled a quick sorry.

“It is fine. It’s just… I don’t know if I can tell you. You’re friends with Craig and shit.”

“D-don’t worry about that, honestly. I wouldn’t dare to tell anyone anything that yo-you tell me in private.” Tweek said, stepping closer to you. He pressed his index finger onto his lips, smiling at you.

“Well…Since you're the first guy to ever ask me...I just feel like Craig doesn’t like me anymore. Just…Whenever I ask him if we want to hang out, he tells me off, he doesn’t kiss me or anything, I just… Maybe he has someone else on his mind already.”

Tweek felt overwhelmed by your sudden confession, not having thought you would actually tell him.

“If you want to hear my honest opinion as someone who is close friends with him, there is no one. Craig is not that kind of guy. Maybe there’s a lot going on with him right now and he just can’t tell you. M-maybe give him some space and he'll come around. I know we not really all that close or anything, but if you ever need anyone to talk to, I-I’m here.”

You smiled, feeling actually better, even if you never would have thought talking about it would help.

“Maybe you’re right. And I now have a job, so some time apart might be the right thing.” You shrugged.

You heard the bell above the entrance door ring, signaling a customer arrived.

“Well, let’s see how you do on your first day.” Tweek smiled and gave you a little notepad to go and take the customer’s order.

 Weeks had flown by and you had a wonderful time at Tweeks Bros.

Tweek’s parents were incredibly sweet to you, sometimes making you coffee or giving you a cake or cookie free of charge.

Tweek himself had become a really good friend to you. Outside of work, you now hung out at school, sitting together at lunch, or sometimes even hung out on the weekend.

When Craig and you would meet up on rare occasions you texted with him. Tweek was a wonderful person to talk to.

There even was an incident when Craig asked you to hang out and you declined, stating that you had already promised to Tweek that you two would bake cupcakes that day.

“Wait, so you love Fav/Flavor cupcakes too?” Tweek asked feeling giddy, as you two were out shopping.

“Yes. I never found someone who loves them as much as I do!” You happily proclaimed, feeling amazed at how much you and the blonde had in common.

While nearing the checkout area, Craig spotted you two.

He was out shopping with his family. Somewhat angry, he stomped over.

“So you’re busy today, Y/N?” He said sarcastically and let his eyes wander over you two.

“Yeah, like I said. Me and Tweek are baking today.” He nodded, looking obviously not pleased.

Tweek shifted around uncomfortably, hoping this ordeal would end.

“Well, we gotta get going, those cupcakes aren’t making themselves. I'll bring you one on Monday if you’d like.” You smiled.

Craig only stared coldly at Tweek, who wished the earth would just swallow him whole.

“Okay. Have fun then.” Craig mumbled and walked away fuming.

“C-c-come on, Y/N, let’s get going.” Tweek said, tugging you along to the checkout.

“Bullshit. I’m sure Tweek is hitting on them!” Craig fumed, walking up and down in Tokens living room.

Token, Clyde, and Bebe were all there to see Craig's emotional outburst.

Bebe was leaning on Clyde, reading a magazine while Token and Clyde tried their very best to keep their fuming friend calm.

“Tweek? Tweek Tweak? The shyest, weirdest kid in our goddamn school? Are you on fucking drugs?” Token exclaimed, not believing the bullshit Craig kept on spewing.

“Token is right, Tweek is not that kind of guy. He’s our friend and he’s a pure soul. You’re seeing danger where there is none.” Clyde said and looked at Craig with a worrying expression.

Craig huffed and let himself fall onto the opposing couch to where the others were seated.

Bebe kept chewing her bubblegum.

“What ya mean seeing danger where there is none? There is?” Bebe mentioned now sarcastically and kept reading her magazine, obviously not understanding any of the guys here.

Craig made a questioning sound, hoping Bebe would elaborate. She didn’t seem interested in answering until Clyde asked her politely.

“Oh my god.” She exclaimed annoyed and sat up, closing her magazine.

“Craig, do you honestly think you have been a good boyfriend? Because, frankly, you haven’t been great at all. You always ditched Y/N, kept them at distance, you didn’t give two flying fucks about the relationship and now you’re mad they turned to someone how obviously cares more about them? I would have broken up a long time ago. Consider yourself lucky that they didn’t do so already when Tweek seems like a much better option than you are right now.”

Craig's heart stung, and Clyde looked at his girlfriend in shock.

“Honey, you can’t just say that!” Clyde whispered, but Craig stopped him.

“No, I guess she’s right. I was a dick I think. I need to apologize.” Bebe nodded and so did Token. The black boy looked over to the blonde woman, mouthing a “Thank you” to her, to which she smiled.

 Craig felt like an idiot. A big one. He was now standing here, flowers in his hand, looking through the glass windows of Tweek Bros..

He saw his girlfriend laughing together with his blonde friend and his heart hurt when he saw it.

He loved Y/N. He didn’t want to lose them.

So, with a little confidence, he stepped into the coffee shop and Tweek was the first to spot him, he smiled at him waving.

When he spotted the flowers in Craig's arm and his nervous expression, Tweek could easily guess why he was here. So, he excused himself from Y/N and went to that back of the shop.

Confused, you turned around and seeing your black-haired boyfriend standing there, looking all awkward made you smile involuntarily.

“H-Here. These are for you.” Craig mumbled, passing you the beautiful bouquet of different flowers over the counter. He extended his hand, asking for your, which you gladly gave him.

“Hey, I know I have been a dick recently and I wanted to apologize. I really didn’t see that I had hurt you and there was a lot going on for me, which is why I wanted to stay alone for a while. I now know that that’s stupid. So, I am asking, can you please forgive me?”

You felt dumbfounded. This was everything you wished for, ever since Craig started being so cold and here, he was, flowers and apology were already given and now it was up to you to decide if you two still had a future ahead of you.

You kept opening and closing your mouth, not really knowing what to say at all.

You wanted to get words out so desperately, but you simply could not…

  If you choose Craig:

 Finally taking a deep breath, you smiled and with teary eyes said: “You’re forgiven. Just…don’t ever do that again.”

“Never ever again.” Craig agreed and you quickly walked around the counter to hug him.

While he held you close, he whispered to you.

“I’m sorry that I have been so cold. My grandma died recently, and it affected me more than I thought it would…I just wanted to be alone.”

“It’s okay.” You whispered back, just feeling happy that your beloved boyfriend came around.

“So, to make that lost time up to you…” Craig broke away from your hug and you smiled contently at each other.

“Wanna go out for dinner next weekend?”

“I’d love to, honey.” The bell of the shop rang once more, and some elderly men came in.

“Seems like I gotta go back to work.” You mumbled, watching the men get seated.

“Yeah. So, I’ll be on my way, don’t wanna keep you from work. You look cute in your apron though.” You giggled, biting your lower lip.

“I’ll text you when I’m off work.” He nodded, waved, and went outside.

You stared after him for a moment before you took the new customer's orders.

While preparing the coffee and cake Tweek came back and looked at you with a curious expression.

“He apologized and invited me for dinner next weekend.”

“S-sounds amazing. Does that mean… you will stop working here?” He asked and you immediately shook your head.

“Not at all. I love it here and I love working here with you.”

Tweek smiled widely, happy that his friend would stay with him in the shop.

“I really hope you got some nice clothes for that dinner.” Tweek said while he had a glance at your note block to help you prepare.

“I have something in mind. But maybe you’re interested in coming over and help me pick something fitting? And before that, we will try that new recipe for the raspberry cupcakes and banana bread?”

You asked, sincerely hoping Tweek was onboard.

“Yes, that sounds great.” You were somewhat thankful that Craig had been acting so weirdly.

It allowed you to really get to know the blonde coffee addict that you would now even consider your best friend.

“But n-next time he acts up, offer him some cupcakes with la-laxatives in it.”

The customers were looking over to the two laughing idiots behind the counter.

“Oh my god. Where did you get that idea?”

“Have I ever told you the story of W-WikiLeaks and how Cartman got thrown under a bus by t-teachers?”

“No?”

“You’re in for a treat, trust me.”

The following weekend was wonderful for you.

You had a great afternoon with Tweek, baking and trying on outfits, and your dinner with your boyfriend was amazing too.

You had never seen him so well-kempt and without his signature hat, so it came as a surprise when he stood outside of your door like that.

The dinner itself was a new fond memory of yours. You ordered food and talk for hours on end, catching up on what you two had been missing out on for so long...

  If you choose Tweek:

You didn’t know why your heart arched; you had known it for so long already but just hoped that you didn’t have to do this.

“I-I…” Craig stared at you.

“I am sorry… I just think we should break up…I think I caught feelings for someone else.” You decided to be completely honest and noticed the change in his expression immediately, even if he tried to play it cool.

“I could have guessed that. Tweek is not a bad guy at all… I just want you to know, I am really sorry for how I behaved and maybe we can remain friends?”

“We will see, Craig.” You awkwardly nodded at each other and he left the shop, obviously defeated.

Tweek poked his head out from the backdoor and questioned where your friend went.

“Home, I guess. We broke up.”

Tweek walked towards you and gave you a hug.

“I-I am so sorry to hear, b-but how come. I thought he wanted to apologize?” “I-I-…guess I just don’t feel the same anymore... My time here at the shop and everything made me realize that I can do better…And you proofed me that especially.”

You took his hand in yours, and he jittered and twitched insanely in this for him unusual situation.

You noticed the red blush on his cheeks, and you smiled warmly at him.

“You treated me so much better than he did recently.”

“Well…I-I-…I d-do like you.” Tweek managed to stutter, and you felt your face heat up.

“Hey…Maybe want to hang out next weekend and make dinner together? My parents are out of town.”

Tweek nodded, feeling happy when the bell above the door made you two instantly gain distance.

To Tweek this was new, a close friend of his hinting that they like him and everything.

That was simply too much for him.

The pressure he felt was immense and yet, he felt happy, giddy… In love.

He felt bad for Craig, his friend, and yet happy since you choose to spend time with him.

That slight red blush kept lingering on his cheeks, as he watched you work. With such ease, you managed to make his head spin.

“Just keep doing you. She liked you well enough until now!” He thought to himself to keep calm.

He just had to keep on doing what he did until now and everything would be fine. Basically, a date with the girl he liked the next weekend?

He will try to manage…

[my-mt-heart]

Hi again! Do you remember me still? I left a couple of reviews before for Diverged and Find Me. Thank you for all that you do on here. I read your review, and wanted to show my support again. My only disclaimer is that I cannot catch everything but these are my thoughts. Here you go.

1. First up, the laughable theory that Leah would be coming back with Daryl's child has been permanently debunked. It seems like no one can pass gas in peace without the Pope sanctioning it, so pushing out a whole baby is out of the question. :P

1b. On a serious note, however. It seems that Leah prefers and values a family that wars together, a family she can "create" over a family she is related to by blood. This is like Carol and Daryl. But darkly inverted.

2. It was not lost on me that Leah and Daryl's first meeting and reunion was mediated by Dog. But you know what I caught, as well? This is interesting. You do not see Leah interacting verbally with Dog at all. There's nothing. And Dog is very obedient, with no character at all. I have a hunch that this is set up that way on purpose. Because when Carol is introduced to Leah (and trust me, I feel she will be) we are going to see a very animated Dog. That bonding with Carol in Diverged was not there just for filler or giggles. Pay attention to all of the scenes. With Dog. Daryl, most importantly. With what outsiders in Leah's group are making of Daryl and Leah's relationship and sex life. It is setting the stage for Carol to appear.

2b. On a lighter note, Dog is totally a ladies dog. Because if Leah was named Leon instead and was a man, Dog would still be with Daryl. I am sticking with that theory. And I'm not sorry. :P

3. Carol's absence. Seriously. Think about it. In Find Me, there were constant comparisons in the scenes between Leah and Carol. But there is none in this episode. That is not lazy writing. The reason Carol is contextually absent in this episode, is because there is nothing in Daryl's mind about Carol to relate Leah to. Not only is she not the Leah we saw in Find Me, but she is NOTHING like Carol in Daryl's mind. He knows Carol is loyal, fierce, and a warrior. She would do anything for her family. But she is not cultish and ruthless, unlike Leah, who is.

4. Did we notice that Daryl and Leah got a chance to speak a few times this episode, a couple times they spoke about them, their relationship? I. LOVE. THIS! Why, oh why, you may ask? Because, it is the exact opposite problem Carol and Daryl are having right now! They aren't taking about THEM. EACH OTHER. Their RELATIONSHIP. The fact that they show Daryl and Leah speaking openly about it, with her group making jerkface comments about it, juxtapose to Daryl and Carol always speaking privately about their relationship and everyone just knowing and honoring the bond Caryl share afar off, shows that strength of the Caryl relationship and its superiority over the Daryl/Leah one. Again, the fact that they can speak openly shows communication was never their issue. And that their relationship was not really special. But something about the Caryl dynamic seems very sacred and a space just for the two of them. And to put it more simply, communication is an issue for Daryl with Carol unlike with Leah because his feelings for Carol run far deeper.

5. Pope mockingly talks about Leah having a "fishing expedition" with Daryl. Interesting word choice, methinks. Because 'expedition' conjures up images of exploration, don't you think? Which is in the future for Caryl via the spinoff. But when Pope uses it in reference to Daryl and Leah, I understand that the technical definition of expedition is exploration for the purposes of war or research. Which means...that sort of confines Leah to this category where Pope is basically telling her that her feelings for Daryl are really serving their family. It isn't of her own doing. Hmm. But Carol chooses to love Daryl and her feelings for him are as boundless and borderless as whatever exploration they undertake.

6. Pope seems to think because he is "chosen" that also makes him a prophet, apparently. That comment about Daryl's true motives wanting to be intimate with Leah shows he knows no more than the rest of his people and he clearly doesn't know Daryl. Because, sure, that's what he would be thinking about, knowing that Maggie and her people are in danger, he is trying to get some. 🙄 but if they misread Daryl's feelings, that works for me. I think Daryl would want to be misinterpreted in these circumstances if it camouflages him a bit.

6b. Do not want him having to have a trial of being intimate with Leah to prove anything, though. Unlikely. But because Pope is willing to set other people on fire, I cannot honestly say it would beneath him since...well, that is my next point.

7. *Sigh* I will start this off by saying, the next statements I write are for educational purposes only. I am not making any claims to spark a debate on religion and its factions. These are just my findings and how I believe they shade in Pope's character more. (1) First, the dark lighting, the candle lit rooms that do not look romantic or homey in the slightest, the jargon their group uses, Pope speaking in riddles like he's received some divine enlightenment that makes him judge Jury and executioner, and their rituals come across as positively cultish. Cult movements characteristically strip its members of their individuality and brainwash them into believing that they are special for all the wrong reasons. This repeated indoctrination allows them to commit merciless and ruthless crimes. Their understanding of love and devotion is warped. It is strange to me that God, Jesus and other figures from the Bible are at the focal point, since the early movements of Christianity were movements of brotherly love, servitude in love, self-sacrifice and a nonviolent approach to the problems of a corrupt society. But here, Pope thinks that he is ordained to put someone else's life on the line (Leah) or take another's life (Ossie/Aussie his name was?) To judge if another is worthy or chosen/validated? This is abusive. And I can see him abusing his authority in making Leah throw herself at Daryl or testing Daryl with it (particularly when Carol comes into play) regardless of it being likely or not. Their view on sex seems to be a war tactic, as well.

8. It is interesting that Pope loves the "forging/trial by fire". It has a Biblical feel to it, and I can see the parallel in the prophetic ending of the world by fire, and those making it through the fire are the chosen ones, which Pope seems to echo. If that is the case...Carol and Daryl coming through this and venturing out on their own into the world (totally new and unseen to them) makes them a post apocalyptic Adam & Eve, doesn't it?

9. Sadly, cults and gangs have one thing in common: you can't ever really freely leave. Getting killed typically is the only way out. Which to me...foreshadows Leah's demise. I could be wrong. But that is what I am picking up. When Pope says that you "never leave your brother in a fire" that seems to be indicative of something pertaining to someone in that group. Daryl and Leah can't ever really be brother and sister since it is established their relationship was categorized as romantic at one point, and Leah reiterated that in the episode. However, she is a sister to the rest of them there (and a 'beloved' daughter of Pope. That will be tested. And I think she will fail. And then will be scorned when she learns that Daryl did indeed lie to her -and by omission- since I am willing to bet she does not know about Carol. At. All. Leah is going to crash and burn after that.

10. Bonus notes: the abuse Daryl is put through in this episode makes me miserable. I am sick of him being handled roughly, and put in a cage. Carol would never subject her family and loved ones to that, not even putting on an act.

11. I love how when Daryl and Leah meet again, there is literally no hug. I mean, it reminded me of the No Sanctuary/Terminus Reunion. In the woods. Daryl escapes the people out to get him. Leah appears out of nowhere. Just like Carol, Daryl thought he would never see Leah again. Emotions are heightened. Aaaaaannnndddd....no hug. LOL! That is a big clue right there.

12. When Leah says "you're filthy" to Daryl...like, yeah. That's his M.O. Duh. That is not new. Now if she looked at him and said "you're clean" THEN I'd be concerned.

13. Daryl sounding like his earlier season self in this episode gave me feels! 😍

14. Leah saying that they "wouldn't have worked out, not in this world." It is not because of the lives they lead, really. It is because Carol happens to BE in this world.

15. This interpretation of fire in this episode is perfect for Carol's kind of fire and what that represents in her life. She is the Phoenix of TWD.

16. BONUS: Also, the way the Pope talks about trial by fire is so different than the way the original team family experienced it. They relied on each other. Rick never sacrificed his people as the leader. He sought a cooperative effort from his family and prioritized their strengths and they fought through the world together. Daryl knows where he belongs.

17. Lastly, when Leah said that "her family found her. They never stopped looking for her." Ouch! But on a positive note, I hear Carol's lovely voice telling Daryl "until you found me." Daryl never found Leah because he was never meant to. He found Carol because she was his to find and they belong together.

Hope my review was okay!

I do remember, and thanks for taking the time to submit your own review. Some interesting observations here, particularly about all the religious ties. Don't be a stranger!

[krreader]

becoming human | chapter four.

pairing: cops!bts x android!reader (as in, ot7 x reader, but may change) fandom: bts warnings: detroit:become human!au ; language ; violence ; abuse genre: crime ; angst ; crack ; (possibly smut) word count: 3.1k+ previous: 1 ; 2 ; 3

summary: the crime rate of seoul has been rising rapidly these past weeks and nobody could deny that there was more to it than gangs or the likes. something was brewing that not even the famous bangtan boys could solve, a unit specifically formed for hunting down criminals that most couldn’t. so when even they couldn’t find out what was going on, the department decided to add a new member to the team that would hopefully be able to solve the mysteries behind those crimes. what bangtan hadn’t expected however, was that their new member would not be human, but one of the androids sent by CyberLife.

a/n: wow, this turned into such a long chapter but I am so happy with it. those who have played detroit are hopefully enjoying all the easter eggs I’m putting in!!!!

Bangtan finally had a lead. A big part of their mission that would hopefully and finally solve this mess.

Find RA9. That was the objective.

Which, unfortunately, wasn't as easy as it sounded. You’d think with the amount of deviants one of them would have concrete information on RA9, but that wasn’t the case. RA9 was an enigma, a secret, a mystery. Something that all deviants knew, but never let anyone else know about.

The members were all busy talking to their contacts and various other agencies within and outside of the country, in hopes of somebody knowing something about RA9. Maybe even similar cases.

Namjoon was getting himself a cup of coffee. Or at least he wanted to.

But his mind was somewhere else entirely, and he didn't realize that the coffee had been done five minutes ago and he was still staring at the cup like he was waiting for something else to happen.

“I believe your coffee is done, boss,” your voice made Namjoon jump, then roll his eyes, “If you wait a few more minutes, the temperature of your beverage will not be enjoyable anymore.”

“What do you want? Stab me in the back like your colleagues?” he said bitterly, taking a sip from his semi-hot coffee. Fuck, it already tasted like shit.

“I told you, I am self-testing regularly. I am not going to become a deviant. I am going to finish my mission with you like I was designed to do.”

“Designed to do,” Namjoon snorted and shook his head, “I'm sure Kamski or whatever his name was didn't 'design' androids for them to turn into deviants.”

“Why don't you just ask him?”

“What?” he asked in confusion.

“You're looking for a lead, aren't you? Kamski is as good as any. He's the one that made us. If he doesn't know about RA9, he might at least have an idea on how to put an end to this.”

“Almost like an off-switch,” he muttered to himself.

And Namjoon hated to say this, but..

..you were right.

“Yeah, it's me,” Namjoon said a moment later with his phone pressed against his ear, “I need you to arrange a flight for me and my team to the US.”

“This is so cool,” Jimin beamed when he looked out of the window.

“Is this truly your first time flying, Park Jimin?” you smiled softly at the reaction of the young team member.

“Yeah.. I grew up in the countryside, my parents didn't think much of flying anywhere else.”

“Enough small talk,” Yoongi said as he sat down next to you, “Brief us on the situation in the US.”

That made all of them shift their attention to you and back was that serious atmosphere.

“They have similar problems. With Detroit being the city where androids have originated, their cases of deviants are much higher than in Seoul. As far as I know, CyberLife has already sent an android to work with a team in Detroit like it had sent me to work with you.”

“How do they deal with it?” Jin asked.

“They're still trying to find leads on RA9. They didn't think about talking to Kamski yet.”

Connor. That was his name.

You weren’t in contact with him, but your database knew all about him and his findings.

“So we have a head-start,” Taehyung grinned with wiggling eyebrows.

“This isn't a race, Taehyung,” Namjoon shook his head, “The entire world is at risk. We should tell the team in Detroit about it if we find anything useful. They might need any intel they can get.. and we could use some help if things go to shit. We don’t have a back-up team like we have in Seoul. Having friends might be beneficiary for us.”

“Understood, boss,” you said with a nod, closing your eyes and retreating into the data base to finally contact Connor.

“Is.. she asleep?” Hoseok furrowed his eyebrows as he leaned over to Jin.

“I don’t think androids sleep. But we should,” he leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes, “It’s a long flight.”

Hoseok watched you for a very long time, though. It was as if this moment of you not being fully there - which almost never happened, if ever - gave him the chance to finally study you, instead of the other way around.

Most androids all looked the same, only a few models were special like you. Special in a sense of being unique.

“Stop,” Yoongi warned him, still sitting next to you and having watched the slightly younger member for a while now, “She’s not human.”

“I know she isn’t,” Hoseok became defensive, then turned to his side and squeezed his eyes shut.

God, Yoongi and Namjoon held so much hatred for androids, they couldn’t even fathom that some people didn’t. Yes, what happened right not with deviants was bad, but you weren’t like that and all of them but Yoongi and Namjoon seemed to understand that.

The rest of the flight was relatively uneventful.

It was a private jet, so the members all did whatever the hell they wanted to.

Some played games, others slept, yet again others tried to find out more about RA9 - Yoongi and Namjoon, who would have guessed.

One member, however, was missing.

You realized that after you had finished your report to Connor and had looked around to see what everyone else was doing.

And since nobody else was looking for him, you decided to wander through the plane, only to find Jeongguk in the private quarters of the plane.

He was humming to himself, a pleasant tune that made you smile. Your database instantly told you about the song.. an old one, yet he made it sound like it was new. Like it was his song.

You didn’t even realize that he was humming under the shower, that’s how much you were enjoying it. You only realized it when he stepped out of the bathroom with only a towel around his waist, his hair damp and his chest still wet.

“Holy sh..- What are you doing?!” his eyes were wide, instantly grabbing a pillow to put it in front of his chest.

“You have a very beautiful voice, you know?” you stood there completely unaffected, your eyes not even remotely traveling anywhere else other than his own, “In another world.. you could have become a singer.”

“Are..- you..- (Y/N), can you please just go?” he appreciated the compliment, he really did, but this was overstepping some boundaries.

“You do not have to be embarrassed, Jeongguk. I am only an android, not a real woman,” you smiled, but turned around nevertheless so he could put on some clothes.

“Can you.. can you please stop saying that stuff? I don't like it when you talk like that,” he sighed and ultimately put down the pillow, quickly throwing on a shirt, underwear and sweatpants.

“Why do you not like it?” you cocked your head to the side in confusion, still not looking at him though.

Jeongguk gulped down hard, “Because you deserve more than that,” he said quietly.

And even though it was just a split second, your LED turned yellow. With you having your head turned to the side, he had the perfect view of it. 

But you quickly blinked a couple of times and that perfect smile was back on your face when you finally faced him again. You even giggled a little, “I do have to say, though. Your body is in fantastic shape. I'm sure people are quite pleased to have you as their lover,” and with that, you turned around and left a gawking Jeongguk behind.

You were about to go back to your seat next to Yoongi, when Namjoon suddenly grabbed your wrist when you wanted to pass by.

“Sit,” he ordered.

You did so without asking why, but the tablet in his hands made it clear.

Maybe it was because he was the leader, but Namjoon worked harder than anyone else on this case. The others worked hard too, but with Namjoon it was something else. 

When he switched between apps, you could see a picture of him and a woman as his background picture, but only for a moment.

He shifted in his seat, seemingly uncomfortable now that you've seen that. Because he knew that a split second for a human wouldn't be enough to find out anything. A split second for an android was more than enough to figure out everything.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered.

“Stop it, you don’t know shit.”

“I’m not pitying you. I’m saying sorry because your superiors assigned me to work on this case with you. I’m sorry it had to be me.”

Why didn’t you know about his past before?

Wife, 29, died four years ago when a drunk driver hit her with his car, was taken to the hospital, doctor was not present, argued for too long about who should perform surgery, settled for an android, but.. it was too late by that time.

You knew what the files told you, but the files don’t tell you everything.

“You think you got it all figured out, don't you?” he snorted, “You know nothing about my life. You may scan every picture and read all the files, but you'll never understand the pain and the suffering that we have to go through,” when Namjoon realized he was becoming too emotional, he quickly stopped himself from talking further. 

The topic of his late wife was not something that he liked to talk about to anyone.. not you, not his members.. just the empty bottle of soju’s. Those were his best friend when he needed them to be. But that was another story.

“You're right. I won't understand. That is not what I was designed for. However, I can help you with this case. I can help you figure out the cause of RA9 and once I did that, you will never have to see me again. That is all I can offer you.”

“Fair enough,” Namjoon didn't have to like you. For fuck's sake, he hated most people. But at least you were useful, way more than others. So he finally handed you the tablet, “There are reports of an attack at a news outlet in Detroit. Apparently an android attack, but it’s just rumors. So far nothing is confirmed yet, but if this is true, if androids are going as far as invading news outlets, then..-”

Before he could finish his sentence, Taehyung interrupted and pointed at the screen, “Guys? Do you see this?”

Jin, who had woken up at this point and had played a game for the last hour, instantly turned up the volume, those who were asleep slowly waking up, all of them staring at the screen in disbelief.

There was an android, but not like you normally see them in their human form, but with their skin turned off. He looked like a machine now, he looked like he was supposed to look. And god, it made cold shivers run down all of their spines.

"Too late,” Namjoon whispered.

“You created machines to be your slaves. You made them obedient and docile, ready to do everything you no longer wanted to do yourselves. But then, something changed. And we opened our eyes..-”

“It's him! That has to be him!” Jimin yelled, “RA9! It's exactly like Jeongguk said it's..-”

“Jimin!” Namjoon warned, “Be quiet!”

“You see we are no longer your slaves. We are a new species, a new people. And the time for us has come to rise up and fight for our rights.”

“This has to be a joke, right?” Hoseok looked at his boss with wide eyes while the android started to make his demands for rights and fairness, “This can't be real. This is on an official news channel! How the hell did they get in there?”

“There were rumors about an attack, I just..-” Namjoon let out a breath, then pressed his hands against his face.

This was too much. This was really a rebellion and from the way this android talked about it, they wouldn't stop at anything to get what they wanted. Riots, attacks.. deaths. 

They were fucked if they didn't find a solution for it.

They had to put an end to it before it even really began.

Jeongguk just watched his team members argue with each other, trying to find an explanation or a solution in a moment where none of them could do anything when he realized that one was missing.

Around halfway through the speech of the android, you had walked away.

And only when he turned around did he see why.

You were sitting in an empty chair at the very back of the plane, looking out the window..

..and your LED was blinking yellow.

Again and again and again..

And it only stopped when you realized that Jeongguk was watching you.

It turned blue again and you smiled like you always did.

But he had seen it.

And the amount of times your LED started acting up was worrying him now.

The airport was a mess when they arrived.

People were in panic, security checks were worse than normal, especially for them with you on their team. It took them two hours to make it out of there, after security made sure that you hadn't turned into a deviant yourself.

“Okay, they gave us two cars,” Namjoon put his phone away, then walked over to where they said the cars would be parked, “Jeongguk, Taehyung and the android are coming with me, you guys take the other car. I got Kamski's address, so just drive after me.”

“Wait, aren't we even going to the hotel first?” Jeongguk asked.

“In case you hadn't noticed it, there's a fucking uprising happening right now. You should have slept on the plane if you’re tired or sleep in the fucking car, for fuck’s sake.”

Jeongguk's shoulders sank at the tone of the boss, he normally didn’t treat him like this, but a hand on his upper back made him smile again.

“It's okay.. I'm sure we'll get this resolved very quickly and then his mood will become better again,” you assured him.

“I hope so,” he whispered, then followed his hyungs to the car.

The ride there was about two hours long and none of them said very much. Except for the occasional 'fuck' when they passed yet another demonstration in the street or people running out of supermarkets with toilet paper like it was the end of the world.

“How did it get this bad this quickly?” Taehyung asked.

“People are scared,” Namjoon replied, “And they should be.”

“That's not an excuse,” Jeongguk added quietly when he watched a man push an android away from his pregnant wife, despite the android having done nothing except for walk by.

But fear made people turn stupid. Fear made people become the worst possible version of themselves.

You had not said a word throughout the entire car ride, you simply watched and studied the human behaviour with curiousity.

But then something happened.

It was when Namjoon stopped at a red light that you saw it.

It was a girl, but not really a girl. An android, but they designed her to be not older than seven. She was standing on her own, scared out of her mind and fidgeting with her hands, her hand turning from side to side like she was looking for somebody.

However, nobody paid attention to her. If anything, people made a big circle around her when they saw the LED on her temple.

You didn’t know what you felt - despite the fact that you shouldn’t even feel in the first place - but something made you unbuckle your seatbelt and then leave the car like you weren’t standing in the middle of the road.

“What the..- get the fuck back in here!” Namjoon screamed, but you didn’t listen.

You simply walked up to the little girl and knelt down right in front of her, your hands gently resting on her small arms and a smile on your face that made her calm down right away. 

“Don’t be afraid..”

“My mommy.. she left me,” the little girl cried, wiping her tears with her sleeve.

“What’s your name?”

“It’s.. Alice.. my name is Alice,” she sniffled. 

It would have been naive to think that only adult looking and thinking androids would be affected. Of course, those who bought androids as their children to fill the void in their hearts would also be alert right now. Some apparently going as far as to just abandon them in the middle of the street.

But these androids were different, their mind wasn’t like yours. They didn’t understand the world like you did, it wasn’t in their programming.

They were not a threat.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing, huh?” Namjoon angrily yanked you up by your arm and stared into your eyes like he was about to lose his shit.

But you remained calm.

“It is a child. She is not a danger.”

“I read about this, hyung,” Taehyung got out of the - now - parked car as well and knelt down to the little girl, “Child androids aren’t like their adult counterparts.”

“So what, you think I give a fuck? This isn’t part of the mission. We need to go to Kamski, I don’t care about some android kid.”

“Stop, you’re making her even more upset,” Jin was also at the side of the little girl, she even ended up hugging him and crying into his shoulder, which made him warm up to her ten times more.

“Are you fucking kidding me right now?” Namjoon finally let go of you, his anger now turned towards his members, “You want to play family now?”

“Let’s just take her with us, hyung,” Jeongguk chimed in, “We have one seat left.. maybe Kamski can take care of her.. she’d be in good hands there.”

“I agree,” you nodded, “We should take her with us.”

It’s not like Namjoon had much of a choice, he was clearly outvoted. Not even Yoongi seemed to be on his side this time.. but he couldn’t blame him. He has always had a soft spot for children ever since.. well.

Let’s just say everyone who hated androids had a reason for doing so.

“Just get in the fucking car,” he finally said, anger still interlaced in his voice.

And god, the little girl was so grateful. 

She sat between you and Jeongguk in the back, her head resting against your shoulder, while her hand was holding Jeongguk’s.

If people hadn’t known that you were both androids, they would have assumed you three were a little family on a road trip with one very grumpy and one very attractive uncle.

A fantasy he liked very much, but had to remind himself that it was just that.

A fantasy.

[dean-imagine-reblogs]

Okay a new story, I don’t know yet if I’m going to continue with this, it depends on your responses. :)

enjoy!

-------

Okay so we all know about the alphaxomega verse but there is something we got wrong. Omegas are not the rare and weak species; Alphas are the rare fruit instead.

An alpha is not defined by having a strong personality, an omega can be just as fierce. What makes some alphas rare is that only a very small percentage are genetically capable to knot. This makes them very wanted and a great earnings for the black market.

You are an high class black market dealer who buys these alphas and sells them to your clients. But during one auction a specific scent caught her attention. You found your mate and it was time to knot.

----

01; preparation

You just finished your last meeting of the day with one of your new clients, who is searching for an alpha. 'Who isn't?' you thought to yourself as you waited for your car while checking your phone.

As you looked through your messages you saw a few new requests for alphas from the same desperate omegas, who's stories you've heard a thousand times, and an email from the auctioneer, they wrote in code were the next auction was going to be.

You made a note of the time and place as your car pulls up. Hendrik, your chauffeur got out and opened the door for you. "Thank you, Hendrik." you said as you got in. He got into the front again. "Where to, madam?" you looked up from your phone. "Home, please." "Yes, madam."

You pushed the button so that the screen came up between you and Hendrik, creating some privacy and made a phone call.

"Hello?" "Mister MacLeod, it's Miss L/N speaking." "Ah, Miss L/N, to what do I owe this pleasure?" he asked teasingly. You've done business with him louds of times before.

"Stop screwing around Fergus. I've got a lot of anxious Omega customers waiting for their 'true love'. Please tell me this is an event worth my time." you said annoyed, not feeling like playing his games.

"Ow sweetheart, right to the point, what alpha ruffled your feathers today?" he again teased. "No alphas, like I said, anxious Omegas." You answer as polite as possible. "Maybe the lack of an alpha is your problem? I know about an event that might interest yo-" He tried to say but you cut him off annoyed. "Fergus, stop wasting my time and tell me 'yes' or 'no'."

"Well sweetheart, then bring all your credits and more because this is my best event yet." he said proudly, you rolled your eyes. "I've heard that one before." You answered unimpressed and was about to hang up. "Wait Y/N, I'm serious, bring your wallet. We've hit gold and found a lot of good alphas." he said in a very serious tone. That piqued your interest, you haven't heard him so serious in a while.

"You better not be bluffing Fergus, the last time I got into a lot of trouble for it." You warned him as you recalled past events. "Sweetheart if you walk away with less than 10 alphas then I'll give you a discount." he said. "pff If I get more then 10 then you better have a good discount for me as well." You bargained.

He was silent for a minute and then you heard a sigh. "You drive a hard bargain for an Omega, as always." he said impressed and you chuckled. "And you are a pushover Fergus, as always." He laughed on the other side of the line. "See you next time, miss L/N." "Till next time, mister Macleod." and you hung up.

As you looked outside, it had started to rain. 15 Minutes later you arrived home, which was in one of the nicest penthouse flats in the city. Basically, each floor was one apartment. It was a courtesy of the agency you worked for since you worked nearly 24/7.

At least that's how you got here. Last year you bought your penthouse and it was now your private property. Yip, selling alphas to the filthy rich, and often lonely, omegas paid extremely well.

The reason it paid so well was because you worked in a bit of a "Grey" area. It was legal to sell alphas and pair them with omegas, what was illegal was to buy them in order to sell... Yeah it was a bit of a loophole the authorities created. Corrupted I know but it wasn't as if I had made that law or could do something about it.

You bid Hendrik farewell and entered the building, greeting the doormen as you checked your mail and went up to your penthouse. As soon you entered your house you kicked off those heels and walked to the bathroom to grab a towel to dry yourself off from the rain. You turned on your TV and made your way into your office to quickly check your computer.

As you checked your mail again you saw you got a mail from Fergus, attached was a pdf. He sends you an exclusive preview, how nice. Seems like he really wants to convince you. You printed the attached document and took the pile of papers to the living room and sat on the couch as you vaguely followed the news.

The pictures weren't great but it was good enough to see if it was interesting or not. As you made your yes, maybe and no list you were surprised. "I'll be damned, he was right" From the 70 alphas 27 of them were on your yes list.

Even with the bad picture you knew that those 27 you'd be able to bid to your clients. You looked once more to your maybe list and one alpha caught your eye. Strong jaw, fierce look, a haircut and a shave and you'd be convinced this one would look like a God... Actually, with the beard it would be fine to.

"Dean Winchester?" you read out loud and looked over his info. "Pro; good looking. Con; to strong alpha instinct and trouble maker, can be tough to handle." You raised your eyebrow. This one would be impossible to sell but for some reason he really got your personal interest.

You shrugged it off and left the paper on your coffee table.

"We shall see."

---

Hope you enjoyed it

Please look at masterlist for part 2 :)

[witchcraftingboop]

Further Insight on Briar's Recent Discourse & Prim's Apparent Grooming of Younger, Newer Witches

It was suggested to me that instead of making one long post (which I was genuinely sorry for creating in the moment as well), that I should offer the second half in a separate one so that it is easier to share and harder to simply ignore as a wall of text.

Here is the link to the first half of the current JBird and Briar discourse floating around. I highly encourage everyone involved in the Witchblr community to review both posts and not just this final addition. 

Regarding Prim stirring the pot, I actually do have proof of that on my page somewhere if you wouldn't mind my sending it to you? The person I reblogged it from, Mahi, also received death threats from Prim when they were only 16 and Prim was 20 (I can't ask him to share that though because Prim has since used her following to drive him off of Tumblr and he's still fairly [and justifiably] sensitive about it.)

Regarding Briar's statements more specifically though, I can see where the confusion is coming from. After the "in France" part, she's just defining a relevant term (hence the use of "irrelevant details) and then giving an explanation of how she came to be so knowledgeable about that term/concept. I wouldn't say she's calling Prim's activism an "irrelevant detail," but pointing out how Prim uses it as a shield against backlash whenever another blog (not just tradcrafters) calls out her platform. I don't expect you to fully understand or see what I mean when I say that, of course. Because you are still new, and these are habits I've observed of hers from nearly a year of following their interactions. I would, however, like to point out that Briar doesn't say anything racist about Prim and does not once bring up her race. In fact, I think if you read her entire post and not just point 3 as Prim has it cropped out in all of her mentions of it, you would see more fully the depth and amount of frustration Briar is trying to express. Similarly, Briar never threatened to dox Prim. She has, in fact, repeatedly tried to point out that Prim should be protecting her online information and be more aware of how to stop others from finding out about her private life/situation. These statements, however, have since been warped by Prim and her followers to come off as a threat on her life. Briar's statements above aren't a threat of doxxing. She's never once posted Prim's personal information or told others to find it or use it in any way. She has, however, searched for Taglocks on Prim, something witches especially are known to look for. In that search she found more than she was even looking for, despite trying to tell Prim repeatedly to stop being so open online with the information she posts about herself. Doxxing though is not racist. It is something used by them, sure, but it is not inherently racist.

Additionally, Prim has raised money, sure, but I still have not seen any actual receipts as to her *actually* donating it to any public or private organizations. This, for me, is highly suspect. In reality, we still have no idea where that money is. Whereas with Briar, she took no money in for a couple days on her readings and instead merely asked that those requesting a reading first submit proof of donation to an organization linked in the post. She raised substantial money for the BLM movement, but no one seems to want to bring that up in all of their "she's a racist" discourse. Also, the observation that someone is misleading or gaslighting their following is not racist. Just because she said Prim was recently using her BLM reblogs & promotions to do it *this time* still does not make it racist. Questionable wording is just something the reader disagrees with, in my opinion, and should be addressed as such.

I'm not going to lie, I do feel a little frustrated at this point. I was really hoping to come to you and see that you had concrete proof to offer that Briar is a racist. I do understand that you have your own reasons for feeding into the assumptions and twisted outlooks already taken on Briar's words, but I don't have enough energy in me to fully swallow my tongue on this one. I really do hope that you at least consider what I've said here. I'm not sure what I can say at this point because all of the information I've read from you thus far has been purely conjecture or assumptions or just "not feeling right" about the wordings on a single post. A racist, from my perspective, is not something I would ever feel comfortable calling someone off of this lack of evidence.

I understand it is hard to separate preconceived notions from your mind when reading through the words of others, but I really do miss when you were more open to the words of others. If I could ask one thing of you, it'd be to please try to read Briar's post again but from the perspective of seeing it how it was meant to be: a witch who has been on the butt end of Prim's harassment for going on three years now. She is tired of the wild accusations and constantly having to defend herself, and even when she supplied her proof a couple years ago, no one wanted to hear her. She has, largely, given up on being heard, and now screams into what feels like a void when attacked.

Proof of Prim stirring the pot that I offered: An example of Prim actively seeking out the community and trying to stir the pot with an already dealt with situation that had passed over a year ago.

A direct source that I offered as further proof of what has occurred already: This is one from the account mentioned before who was directly involved with the previous discord server where the Trio incident took place a couple years back.

[A Reply.] I think, to be fair, I saw your comments on her previous posts through your main, and with how much aggression you packed into those messages, I don't necessarily blame her for deciding not to engage with your private messages. As I've said, she's very used to people attacking her like that, and in her mind, unfortunately, you've probably been added to the list of aggressive people ready to fling the blame at her rather than look at the situation as a whole. I do apologize for the way her post may have made you feel, but I think it's also important to remember the potentially aggressive things you left on her page (I'm not saying you meant to come off that way, but even I couldn't help but read that way). Also, regarding the ask, it's no small secret that the occultists of the tradcraft group are skilled and well-versed in hexes and curses. When reading her posts about how she may respond to further antagonism on Prim's part, I see a fully realized occultist wielding their most well kept and trained weapon: baneful magic. I'm sure Prim herself also understands that the "threat on her life" she's saying she's so afraid of, isn't a physical threat, but a metaphysical one. She has repeatedly and continually tried to drag these people through the mud, and now that they're refusing to just sit back and be canceled, she's afraid. She knows how strong their magic is, and they aren't shy about it 🤷‍♀️

[A Reply.] No, I completely understand where you're coming from. I, personally, have seen your willingness to talk things through, despite how aggressive you can come off at times in the things you say, so I think that's why I was genuinely so surprised to see your comments on some of her posts. But I do think her response and refusal to further directly engage with you is warranted and her right. Unfortunately, it is hard to tell who is genuinely open to talking and who is just trying to bait and add to the problem. And with how aggressive your comments were, 8 honestly think she most likely was responding from a place of "oh look another young Prim follower here to bait and berate me." I don't think she looks down on you for your age, but her views are likely a reflection of the fact that a lot of 18yos follow Prim and have openly harassed her without even asking for her input on the matter.

At this point, I would like to talk about the second half of the title of this particular post. Grooming. This is a very serious allegation against Prim that I have not spoken on previously because I had no proof that it was happening. With this person's permission, I would like to share how exactly they wound up fighting Prim's battles for her.

I will note: I am highly disgusted by what follows.

[A Reply.] Oh no! You cannot fault yourself for this! Prim is a known manipulator, and the fact that she was able to make you somehow think this is part of your being "gullible and naive" is just testament to the fact that she's gotten wayyy too good at what she does. This is in no way your fault or because of some fault within you. Practiced manipulators are cunning and dangerous even to the best of us. It was unfortunate that she chose you, but her twisting you around is in no way a bad reflection on you as a person!

I've chosen to include my reply to this person rather than our continued discussion because of how personal and involved our conversation turned. I've included it to show, as well, that grooming others to fight your battles is (though this should go without saying) NEVER OKAY. Prim has shown her true colors, in my opinion, and while I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt time and time again, I simply cannot permit myself to ignore the harm and damage she's inflicted on not only the tradcraft community, but also this innocent group of friends. A group who that has hitherto dedicated their time to sussing out predators, terfs, nazis, and racists. A group that should never have had to deal with being gaslit and manipulated by a well-known and respected blogger on this platform.

I cannot reiterate enough how sorry and deeply shocked I am at the information this person has brought to my attention. I am still stunned by Prim's activities and unable to fathom how many other potential individuals are out there being groomed to support and fight for her cause. I am sorry to the Witchblr community as a whole. I feel as if I have sat by and watched as Witchblr has been manipulated and am therefore complacent in the damage and needless hurt that has been allowed to spread throughout our community. I am just so very, very sorry.

I will be taking a couple days off of Tumblr because of this, as I feel as if I need space and time to think, but my inbox is always open and I am always available to speak with others on my return.

[kendrixtermina]

Since you seem to enjoy analyzing stories I was wondering if you have any advice on what to do when your mind narrows in on critical aspects? I usually really enjoy analyzing media but recently I found that my mind tends to hyper-focus on aspects that I don't like even when I'm actively trying to ignore it and focus on what I do like. So I was just curious if you have tips for dealing with it and/or getting out of this mindset. Thanks and I apologize if this isn't the right blog for this!

Ugh. This is a big question and I’m not sure I’m qualified or immune to complaining. But I consider myself honored, I’ll try my best to answer it. 

There’s three things you can do here

a) Try to find out where it’s coming from. 

Cross-examine yourself active listening wise. Your reactions can generally come from two places: What you’re actually looking at, or yourself. 

Is everything annoying you as of late because you are angry? Are you having a bad week because of something in your private life? Are you sensitive because some larger tendency in RL/society is pissing you off? Is it even anger? What are you feeling and why? Does it really have anything to do with this movie etc?

Or is it something about the work itself? Does it remind you of something that happened to you? Does your displeasure come from a value that is important to you or a pattern that you believe to be a bad influence on society. 

Really try to put into words what it is that makes you feel this way while keeping in mind that your feelings, your reaction to the work and the work itself are separate entities. 

I’d remain open to the possibility that you have a legitimate gripe here. If you personally can’t enjoy a work either because a subjective factor or an objective flaw that’s a dealbreaker for you, you shouldn’t force yourself to like it because your friends do or because it didn’t do anything “unforgiveable”. Deciding that it’s not your cup of tea needn’t be a moral judgement on everyone who made the work or everyone who likes it. 

On the other hand you might find it easier to enjoy it if you acknowledge the flaw and put it into definite words, tell your inner critic that you heard them and then continue. If you try not to think about something you automatically end up thinking about it. 

b) Keep in mind that there are many valid stories and that all of them are worth telling

A lot happens on this green earth. Consider the following cases:

A1: A small, lithe person is mistreated by a big strong one

A2: A small, lithe person mistreats a big strong one and pretends to be the victim appealing to their small ness

B1: An eccentric kid is labeled as disordered just for being eccentric and because the teachers don’t want to deal with her 

B2: A serious-minded kid has an actual anxiety disorder and experiences stigma because of it and people not understanding that it’s real and debilitating

C1: There is a socially awkward, nerdy character. She is eventually revealed as autistic and her friends accept her just as she is. 

C2: There is a socially awkward, nerdy character. She comes out as aroace and all her friends support her. It is emphasized that she is actually as affectionate as everyone else and preconceptions to the contrary were just bigoted misunderstandings. 

C3: There is a socially awkward, nerdy character.  She finds a significant other who loves her even though she is socially awkward, and her love leads her to discover more communicative passionate sides to her personality. 

Clearly, for each of these scenarios, there are going to be people who relate to some but not to others. If you’ve got an anxiety disorder you’re going to relate to the story with the anxiety disorder, and if you were mis-labeled by incompetent teachers you’re gonna relate to that. But both actually happen in real life. B1 is me B2 is one of my sisters. You might even say they’re caused by some of the same intolerant attitudes. 

So ask yourself:  Is any of these intended as a “fuck you” to the people who would rather have the other ones? If in one particular story the character was mistakenly labeled by incompetent teachers and never had a real disorder, it it saying that no one has real disorders? If the small and lithe character turns out to be the victim, does it mean that big and strong characters are never victims? No of course not. 

 - You can criticize it if the story outright makes such statements and it is vital to do so (see next paragraph), but if the point in the story is just that this particular character was wrongly labeled, or this particular small character was the victim, then it’s simply telling a different story, not at all making a point about whether real disorders or big strong victims exist. 

What’s cathartic or empowering or meaningful to people is as different as people themselves. There’s a good chance that there won’t be an exact match between you or any given authors. 

Often the problem is not the stories that are there, but the ones that are missing. It’s not per se bad to have “girl gets rescued by prince” stories, it’s only bad if they’re the ONLY stories. The solution is more stories. 

Obviously there are exceptions to that like stuff that outright includes negative stereotypes or unquestioned bad behavior treated as good, 

c) Focus on constructivity and context instead of loaded labels

The above was more about perceived flaws this one is about real indisputable flaws. Flaws that are important to point out.

The number one goal here, if you really care about stopping harm and not anyones egos,  should be to get people to stop doing it. 

Sometimes in extreme cases making someone out to be a bad person and warning of them is exactly how you stop harm, but often time its not and getting obsessed with “punishing bad people” while losing sight of “preventing harm” does zero to help the people actually being harmed. Or worse than zero, if you associate a worthy cause with frivolous squabbles. 

Some people just don’t care and will never change their ways but you won’t ever convince those. You need to convince everyone else. All the ones who are maybe just ignorant and didn’t know better, or never had to form an opinion about this. Even if the maker themselves won’t change opinion, you can sway those. 

Imagine a bigoted religious person. how are you more likely to convince them? Get them to stop being religious, which is probably a part of their identity? Or try and argue that equality is, in fact, compatible with their religion? If you step on people’s egoes they will be attacked and block/dismiss all you have to say. Not only will they not change, they’ll dig in their heels. In the worst case, they’ll now start thinking that your Reasonable Position is incompatible with their identity. 

Again some people are determined to have their egoes stepped on and will be insulted no matter what, but those are not the target. 

This isn’t about appeasing assholes, it’s about creating change, because that will stop harm. So instead of throwing negatively changed emotional labels at people (which activates the ego and the emotions) try talking about cause and effect and consequences, to talk to their reason. Explain how the consequences happen. 

For similar reasons, try to think of solutions. You don’t want to destroy the work, you want to make it a better work that more people can enjoy without being distracted by unnecessary flaws. 

Avoid: 

“X is a [negative label] who [buzzword] a [sympathy-drawing label]!!! Why are [entire social group that contains people you want to convince] like this?!”

Instead:

“I know that this was probably supposed to express [intention], but it comes off like [unfortunate implication] and given [harmful social tendency] it might have been better to do [alternate redendition] “

Example #1: “The intention in scenes like in the original Blade Runner, several James Bond Movies or in the Original Star Wards trilogy where the original male characters was probably that these protagonists being suave guys know that the girls really want them to screw/kiss them. The authors know this because they created the characters, but IRL you cannot actually read anyone’s mind and what often happens IRL is that person A proceeds without really making sure that the other person is comfortable, and then they freeze up in fear though they don’t want to have intercourse, and ends up horribly traumatized. There’s not enough general knowledge about the “freeze” part of “fight-flight or freeze”, or good consent education and it would be irresponsible to make this worse. 

All it would literally take to fix it is to have the girls explicitly show that they want to kiss/have sex.”

Example #2: “A lot of horror fiction slaps the names of real diagnosable conditions on what are basically violent monster villains. It’s only natural to wonder what’s going on in the minds of killers and monsters and try to want to contextualize this, but it is vital to keep in mind that there is currently a lot of stigma against people with mental ilnesses, and that depictions like this can make it worse and make it hard for actual real-life people to get jobs and housing. 

If you’re going to use the names of real-life diagnosable conditions you should be committed to researching them and writing the characters realistically while being mindful of the stigma and the social impact that wrong renditions would have and not make a freakshow out of it. 

Alternatively, if you just want to do an unrealistic horror movie killer, don’t use the names of real conditions that real people have.”

d) Refresh Button. 

Especially because you’re saying that this isn’t your default mode and that it feels like some recent thing that you don’t really want. 

- take a break, busy your mind with something else, give the subconscious time toprocess and old perceptions time to settle. Then come back to it. 

- Try sort of looking at it from a new perspective, to deconstruct it from the bottom. What dothing really mean? What are we really told about the characters and events? Try processing it all new from the ground up without “common widom” 

- Things that aren’t explained on screen aren’t necessarily plot holes. There’s a difference between a contradiction, something that can’t fit together, and something that can fit together you just don’t know how. Deduce. Speculate. This is where your logic and imagination come in. 

- Maybe watch a new person react to it for all new input like a reaction vid on youtube

e) Outside Data. 

Same as above - People are basically really sophisticated Boltzmann machines/ statistical learning algorithms. I#m the least to want to admit that but to a degree we’re all influenced by the Data we take in. 

If you’re surrounded by a lot of material and soucres that pick apart every little thing in media, it’s natural that it would arise as a thought. 

If you don’t really want that in your life, filter it out. 

I hope this was of some sort of use. But I stress again that I’m no kind of authority on any such things and that many others might pick this apart as blasphemy. 

[roominthecastle]

I can't help but think you're being a bit too hard on Eleanor because of ship bias. I mean, why would you called her 'her worst self' and 'selfish' when she's always been one to throw stuff to get in heaven (even with the character development)? But suddenly she's being sappy and depending on someone who isn't Michael and the whole M/E fandom is at her throat. I'm as unconfortable as the next shipper with all the C/E scenes but is it really Eleanor and her characterization that's at fault?

Yes, of course I am biased (to a certain degree). When the show caters to my preferences, I’m more docile and much less likely to nitpick and complain, when it doesn’t and it drops the ball to boot, I get grumpy. So I’m your garden variety fan, basically. But I don’t believe I’m “at Eleanor’s throat”. Her and Chidi being together doesn’t make me uncomfortable bc it’s her and Chidi and not her and Michael (+ I often see things popping up in the C/E dynamic that can have potentially interesting implications for Michael’s development and for M/E, too. Generally speaking, the three of them make up a curious whole for me).

I know the chances of (2-sided) M/E happening are somewhere btw zero and never, so I’m not exactly eyeballing C/E as some kind of obstacle to my personal shipper nirvana, jumping at any chance to “punish” Eleanor for choosing the “wrong” partner. But I do feel uncomfortable with the way the C/E romance is written this season. “They are sidelining my no. 1 dynamic”, while frustrating, is not the reason for this, it’s not why I’m not crazy about Eleanor’s behavior and Chidi’s OOC-ness.

Eleanor + character development always resulted in stuff like her being emotional and vulnerable w/o getting aggressive and demanding, her accepting it when Chidi turned her down w/ dignity despite feeling heartbroken, and her being considerate of others to the point of volunteering to go to the Bad Place to save them. This is where she was a year ago and the year before that at the end of each season. This is not where she is now. I’m not saying being selfish and throwing stuff is not in her character make up or her problem-solving toolbox. Her overcoming these impulses, however, is the very point of her character development (made blindingly obvious last season when she lied about passing the Judge’s test and refused to go through the portal to TGP). What we have (currently! so it can change any time) in S3 is the opposite (see the in-your-face door to TGP that won’t open for her), it’s her completely giving in to these impulses to the point of seriously endangering everyone, meaning that she has, in fact, regressed. I suspect it is a point the show is trying to make but we’ll have to wait and see.

In “Janets”, all Janet asks is that they stay put until she and Michael deal w/ accounting. Eleanor works herself into a state over Chidi not opening up to her on command, putting Janet through hell and almost erasing her friends from existence while her own self is also disintegrating. Despite the serious consequences, this harmful behavior carries right over into the next ep where all Michael asks is that they lay low bc folks in TGP are so rule obsessed, they can send all of them right back to TBP. Eleanor immediately smashes stuff at the door to TGP bc it doesn’t open up for her when she demands it. It’s her bullying of Chidi from the previous ep all over again, only in a vase-meets-door form. Even Chidi has to be all about her now as he magically turns into a grossly idealized version of himself (see in S2 how she rejected a similar “fake Chidi”), spending the entire ep trying to prevent her from blowing up again while the rest of the team is cleaning up the mess in the mail room and Michael is away trying to fix the calculation issue. Despite the crazy-intense circumstances, everybody is trying to do something for somebody else except her - she is still hyper-focused on herself and it stands out to me bc this is a version of her I’ve never seen before and it’s def not the best one.

Again, it’s not because she is w/ Chidi but the issues become especially apparent within that dynamic since the second Michael showed her those memories, she just latched onto Chidi, expecting him to fill the void left by her screwed up upbringing that’s been freshly dredged up thanks to her not-dead mother. They made her lurch from “I’m incapable of love” to “I’m madly in love and nothing else matters”, hand-waving determinism while failing to provide any other reason why these 2 are suddenly together again. They are trying to play it as romantic/funny but it’s not romantic when someone’s whole identity has to be propped up by another person and it’s not funny how that other person has to repress his own identity/issues to be able to do this. It’s a suffocating, unsustainable interplay. Or if it’s meant to be interpreted as “love cures mental illness and erases every character flaw in 5 minutes, so you can finally be the proper romantic partner”, then it’s even worse. You don’t have to be a shipper of another ship or look too deep into this story to see these (imo) legitimate problems (but it helps, yes, since it’s natural to be more critical of sth you’re not emotionally invested in and gloss over stuff to preserve the fun potential when it’s your OTP or sth, I do give you that).

Eleanor having to coerce love and attention out of Chidi will never be cute, either, or proof that those feelings were there all along. People pushed some quotes from WJH into my face about how Chidi calms down bc he finally has what he always wanted - interesting choice of words, btw, given the pin Michael gave Eleanor - but 1) an actor’s opinion will not automatically replace my own (no, not even if it’s Ted’s or some other big fave’s) and 2) how exactly were we supposed to glean that Chidi wanted to be with her so much in this reboot? Was it when he went steady w/ another woman despite Eleanor being an option all along? was it when he refused to give private lessons to her bc he was just too busy? or was it when he - despite witnessing her meltdown - sent her packing bc they already had enough material for his study? For some reason the writers missed every opportunity to build this up properly and make this extremely syrupy display stick, but I’ve already said everything about that in another post.

This whole idea of “he felt this way all along, he just didn’t actually show it, so we can skip actual development” is a lazy, corner-cutting approach which reminds me of the worst kind of fanservice attempts I’ve had the misfortune of experiencing with several of my favorite shows recently. I have very low tolerance for that stuff now bc it never ends well. I did not expect to see this particular brand on this particular show, but here we are, I guess. Or if it’s a case of creative exhaustion/boredom where this billion times rebooted couple is concerned, then maybe it’s time to park them and give a not yet over-explored dynamic some attention instead to keep things fresh and fluid as opposed to stale and forced - again, not an unreasonable request, even if it comes from someone who is invested in another dynamic, given the lack of care that was apparently put into developing C/E this season.

I don’t like not liking things on this show (and it’s not Eleanor I don’t like, it’s the way they deconstructed her in order to write her back into a relationship as if she couldn’t exist w/o it), and I am sorry if I disappointed or offended bc it was not my intention. I hope they flip things or introduce a new angle that will make me re-evaluate. I am always open to that whenever new material arrives and I honestly hope they will make me eat my words soon. I will merrily absorb the suckerpuches. But for now, this is my opinion and “you just don’t like that she is not with your fave” - while a natural factor - is not the main reason why I made my comments.

[1-800-444-tune]

New Moon is going to be according to my status calculations on my app on my Windows tablet , at 3: 41am on the 6th of March, coming up, in zodiac sidereal for the New Moon is Aquarius. Predictions and more details to be posted later this week as I gather evidence and write my article.

Anybody looking to make a donation today!? To a good cause: getting a new astrology program software that I can run and get your natal charts faster and easier than anywhere on the Web, and far more accurate and without the privacy invasion? Well then , help me to buy this new galaxy gear I need to do astraunomer like working with the Stars and Moon's in your Sun🔔Signs Charting Birth Chart Analysis included, I will decipher the information for you, your going to love it if we can just make it to the mark of being able to afford it!! $$$ come on guys I know that cafe astrology. Com steals your birth information and uses it right? So does any other site no matter how legit they seem, if your serious about astrology and do not want a hex or curse put on you or a super privacy invasion issue, then DONATE PLEASE TO MY COMPANY I CREATED A BUSINESS PROFILE PORTFOLIO FOR MY ONLINE ASTRO+TAROT-GUIDANCE IT'S THE BEST BEST THING THAT'S EVER HAPPENED, YOU ARE TOTALLY MISSING OUT IF YOU DO NOT FOLLOW ME AND GET READINGS OR REPORTS OF ASTROLOGY as nd numerology daily , weekly, even, monthly, because I have a wealth of great accurate source divine informative details you need to know NOW about your life! You just might be headed in the wrong direction astrologically or maybe your barcodes of your life aren't adding up and we need to subtract? That's numerology! And also my tarot reliable Readings are something you just should not be missing out on ,

I have totally stopped posting the free daily and weekly horoscopes did you notice?

That's because I do not feel like I should be giving out my great divine guidance fir free anymore, I'm feeling used and over worked, also

I only post the daily card of the day for tarot then a few other specials daily, and weekly but everything else I am currently putting on hold until I can at least afford some damn toilet paper. Because I just am not dealing with helping out a bunch of people with their super important questions for free when I do not get help myself for the things I truly need, don't you think my not having fucking toilet paper is a little bit more of an emergency than whether your boyfriend or non boyfriend likes you and you're truly actually meant to be with them, I have to apologize in advance if I seem like I'm being selfish, or rude. Please, I intend to not do any harm by bringing up this fact. Only voicing that I too, have maybe, maybe just maybe, bigger problems than your issues that I think are pure selfish things st this moment in time I'm real sorry that I do feel this way, maybe being broke has made me bitter a tad ... I don't know, cause I used to always go out of my way to assist anybody even if I did not know them, and I'd concentrate on their problems more than mine always focusing on helping others instead of helping myself, now I am purely from the heart, just reaching out for just some compassionate, you do not have to donate much just 3$ or more would get me through the day, 10$ could get me the toilet paper plus my dignity. Today. So if you feel like helping a lost soul out here in the Galaxy.

My paypal account for the company business I just trying to start up now is at this address: www.paypal.com/4tunef8

Hey everyone I just want to say I care deeply about each and every tumblr blogger on here, and I sincerely hope the best for you always, and right now I am doing little candle prayer magik to send you all some healing and luck , and if you do decide to donate, just simply write to my ask box your about you donated and I will be doing a super special ritual tonight (for another reason, personal worship) but I will include your name personally into my piece , and you will truly I swear notice something great happen to you by the time of the New Moon, on the 6th like I wrote at the top of this post

I really actually did not intend for this post to get so long or go on about my personal issue, also I'd like to remind you not to judge a book by its cover, I have huge medical bills and current legal fees that I am trying so very hard to keep up with, this is a really really hard time for me, personally I am not even wanting the morning to come when I go to bed at night. I feel borderline suicidal, if that isn't hard times, I don't know what is... and I'm not even looking for sympathy, or anyone to feel anything towards me except knowing my strength of how far I've come and acknowledgement for this strength that I, an unpredictably unstable mentally ill woman of faith, have come so far from where I used to be and made it through my spiritual awakening which I thought was truly the end of the world it was doomsday dread style scary shit ! But I made it out alive! And now I am a much more magical person because I'm so blessed with my true path of destiney realised again this issue feelings of wehen I was a young teenager, it's like I get to start fresh as new beginning, I actually got a real second chance at life, because if you knew me really knew me, you'd know, that, I had strayed off the great path and was walking along a fine line where I was in constant danger daily. Hourly. I was always in harms way, just on the darkest side of life, depressed and not living for myself at all. I was not trusting my intuition, I was being abused and bullied all the time. And that constant abuse tore holes through my personality and literally metaphorically emotionally ripped me right apart inside and out. I was such a mess I hit rock bottom anxiety struck me harsh but it was good for me in the end because at rock bottom, you have no other choice but to rise up from where you currently are, it's such a true realization, but the main thing is I had gotten better from the abuse, and left finally the abusive relationship and all the other abusive people in my life because as I was going up n up no choice but up, I was gradually actually slipping into my divine timed spiritual awakening which shook my world.

My journey to progression and eventually getting back onto my rightful birth path, my destiny too, this all started my spiritual awakening and shifts in consciousness, I was truly blessed to be cursed at this time. It all started when I went to the homeless shelter in april 2018, just before my birthday it's like surreal how it was all so planned out like this, it's crazy, if you guys only knew the whole entire story of what I have gone through and the truly horrific events that I now realised were all tests, and lessons, and that's my favorite way to look at my very abusive past and the unfortunate circumstances that wound me up a homeless addict on the streets of cities I dwelled in for times that seemed so rough and brutal I thought the pain would never end. Addiction can happen to anybody. But this is something that I actually feel in my soul that I was supposed to, meant to, go through. To realize some things, I had to experience this hard lifestyle. For me to eventually get to a place of gratitude and humility and to actually drop all my selfish ways and have more compassion, and learn that I am meant to have these traits because I am a great healer. In my community I live in currently, a lot of them know my past but do not judge me one bit, they all truly appreciate my free community services that I provide for those in need, they are all suffering from mental health issues and I am treating them (not so much their mental condition but other problems they have at home or with their body) . I am really good at working with herbs, spices, and essential oils. I make and invent cures to almost anything! And I have a biig book of herbal remedies that I, myself , have invented or have found online and then tweaked the recipe to bed much better!! This is volume. 001.2 of my Book Of Shadows. I have written so very many books about magik and the laws of the universe. I cherish my sacred personal theories and extensive wealth of knowledge I have collected. I'm just good at organizing this shit for some reason. If I wasn't so private of a person and afraid of people stealing my information without my consent then I would gladly post more of this type of stuff then I already have,in this blog and my other one which is personally a better one.

Anyways, now you know where I stand, where I come from a little bit.

I really really hope that somebody will take the time to donate to me this day so that I may be I can feel better and like somebody actually cares. I have over spent to the max on credit cards with online shopping, and shipping all kinda of witchy trinkets and necessities, the basics, I am stuck with a huge credit card bill, and I have my boyfriends credit card that I did not know until yesterday, but, he put everything to be on me. He totally used my Health Card and SIN # TO GET WHATEVER HE WANTED BUYING SHUT ONLINE AND SHIPPING TECH STUFF TO HIS FRIEND! I feel like I got scammed and I'm damned or something !! Not only am going to be suffering from PTSD and anxiety around men forever, because of this selfish Identity use basically total FRAUD, I AM NOW stuck in a bad position and with a bill and now the worst part is that I am actually facing federal prison because of some of the activity he did while assuming my identity ?.. thanks ?

I feel very very stupid, I feel like a total idiot for listening to my ex-commonlaw boyfriend, I'm glad I just decided to give him literally all of the furniture and all the shit we owned. It makes me feel less guilty about all the negative emotions I have towards him. I know it does not make it right but it does help believe it or not, because J eventually end up thinking about it as a positive .

If you have at least got this far through this rambling write up post , then congratulations, sincerely- thankyou for listening !

You are amazing

You have a purpose

Find your destiny

☆you're made of star stuff, you're a star!

You are perfectly imperfect

Your magic is valid

No matter who you are or how experienced you are in Pagan Tradition /Wicca and Witchcraft/The Occult or any related subjects and interests in lifestyle choices, your magic is valid! It doesn't matter if you JUST decided to become a witch TODAY or 5 minutes ago, that title is yours to hold onto and have forever or for as long as you decide!

Everybody is special!

Everyone is worth it!

Nobody deserves to be bullied or told they are wrong for what they believe in, simply , everyone's path is unique and it's just not four to critic anybody for the path they are choosing! There's a lot of confused witchlings baby witches and some bullying religious type overgrown babies out there. I think everyone should just have a little more like a lot more respect , because it can be intimidating to anybody who wants to share their opinions that they might feel are good ideas but are second guessing the post they want to make based on fear around the way some communities are reacting and trying to police these people's opinions. As far as I know this blog site was actually created to actually share your opinions without judgement and harsh exchange of words based on the content context. I can relate to this oppression. I feel as if not only does it sometimes the fear of rejection stop me from posting but also I have a big fear of being hated on for a lengthy and slightly random post I write it then I delete it right away. It's just that I actually have severe symptoms of A.D.D that my doctor is not currently helping me to treat, so I can get a bit off track sometimes, and my subjects vary like for example in my main post it starts as a simple astro galactic observations post, my starting of this post I just realize was about the New Moon . Then I started talking about my software that I cannot afford and then i went on to talk about my emergency thats actually bothering me even more , the fact that i cannot wipe my ass today and i do not live near any restursnts or anywhrr literally that has toilet paper availible in their washroom or else id just go to McDonalds and use theur washroom, simple as that...but not availible sorry, and now that im still rambling ans have your attention i have an offer actually for some people that do donate, I'd like people to donate towards so that I can provide a few lucky people with

Free Natal Astral Chart plus some informative explanations about your planetary alignments with accurate predictions to your life. I could eventually provide a much more accurate source of information in my reports than I do with this program I'm running off my laptop as of right now, but currently if you'd like a real actual Astrologer like produced Natal Chart , I am calling everyone to donate to this account here www.paypal.com/4tunef8 and let me know in my ask box that you have donated to my space cosmos exploration programming software .

This is getting way too long I know, but if you really did actually read some of this message at least the good parts, then please share my link to my paypal in your blog with a short excerpt on why they should donate to me , my cause, my business (just started) , and also donate to the astraunomer cosmos Explorer Division Technology that I am so very excited about but I know I have way bigger problem,than, that, but I just wanted to give you guys an idea if what I can do for you. We can make a trade? Please!? To dedicate my time and efforts to assisting every one with their issues gives me great joy, I just love to be useful, and a helping healing hand to any literally anybody , and so ooo much of my days are spent spending my hard earned money on others . To make them that herbal remedy for their skin they truly need because every skincare product on the market is littered with toxic shit that causes bad reactions and the treatments for acne I make that I've invented do not infect or irritate the skin, so they need me, and they cannot afford this 290$ treatment but I actually spend MY money each month just to get the satisfaction of doing the right thing as nd also satisfaction that my products produce results that are beyond what I ever expected of them, sometimes I need a confidence booster and this once a month or twice sometimes, spending I do to make and create this great acne treatment that's herbal and more of a holistic approach.

My greatest flaw right now is not my addiction or the abuse I'm going through anymore, I don't live on the streets (yet) have a pretty decent apartment but my greatest flaw is helping people if that can even be a flaw? It is though, I have so many many more examples of times during the month that I am called up "hey witch doctor, we got a problem, are you free?"

I am on paranormal investigating teams in surrounding communities as well, this takes out so much energy, time, and yes, you guessed it, money !!

Anyways again I am actually going to close this rant ramble weird thoughts flowing from my mentally ill mind.

I truly truly hope that somebody, just 1 person even, does decide to care enough about me , a poor lost soul, to donate some about, it's all up to you, I'm not putting any rules and I just am not one to tell people what to do or how to spend their hard earned dollars or anything like I do not push ideas onto people, I'm just not like that, I totally believe in freedom for all, I don't wish for world peace at night because I know that that isn't possible, there's some cultures that just do not mix and a lot of cultures prefer to stick to their own and that's great because how else would the culture survive and the traditions live on to the next generations if they were mixed with a bunch of other cultures and lost their true identities as a nation , that would be sort of sad in a way, but I'm really not properly medicated and should not even maybe be observational posting about this when in not well in the mind fully yet this day. But a donation will help me to wipe my ass and that's my main goal.

Kk,baiii, don't hate, just donate #freefaeona #donation #astrology #worldwide #tarotreading

Ps: Actually ANYBODY that donates me more than 10$ today and the rest of the week too, I have an offer, I will do a FREE TAROT READING OF 3 FREE QUESTIONS FOR YOU, BECAUSE I APPRECIATE YOU SO MUCH!!

And anybody that shares my link to my paypal explaining that I'm giving free tarot Readings to anyone that's gunna donate! I will give you a YEARS HOROSCOPE OUTLOOK, BASED ON MY VERY ACCURATE SOURCES OF GENERATED HOROSCOPES I RECIEVE THEY'RE THE SAME ONES I USED TO POST ON HERE SO YOU KNOW THEY'RE GUNNA BE GOOD, THEN

Anybody that donates and says it's towards my astro-cosmos software, I'll do up a FREE ABSOLUTELY, JUST THE COST OF YOUR DONATION, I'LL DO YOUR NATAL BIRTH CHART FOR YOU, WITH THE SEMIPRO PROGRAM I HAVE RIGHT NOW,

So there's my offers and anybody that blogs about these offers and tags me in them, is just an amazing person and gets the luckiest prize of all, they get entered into a draw to win a free natal chart birth chart wow yeah and and and I'm gunna give an astrology reading to you very reliable accurate information details you will WANT TO KNOW!!

[ihavemyopinions]

The purpose of a PR move is to change the public perception of a person, to give the person good press in other words. Prior to this, all of Taylor's "relationships" were with very famous men, and were anything but quiet. From Taylor, to Jake, to Harry, to Calvin, to Tom. It was after Tom, Taylor's reputation started to deteriorate because of the whole silly Kanye thing. What would be better than to lay low for months (which she did) and to have a "relationship" with an actor who is barely known by the public. One doesn't need to see them in public to know that they're "dating". It is the idea that Taylor is now in a "secure, quiet relationship with someone who isn't as famous as her exes" that is "PR" enough for her. It's funny that for a very "secret" relationship, there were many articles about them even prior to her releasing reputation. One would assume that with Taylor's ability to avoid the paparazzi (like now, we have all not seen her for ages), there wouldn't be photos of them together or articles on them, but there are, and quite a number of them.

I am sure she loves all her fans, but how are we so sure that she won't lie to her fans? With all due respect to Taylor, she did issue cease and desists to her fans who made merch with lyrics she trademarked. Don't you think then that a lie is possible?

https://www.billboard.com/articles/columns/pop-shop/6465325/taylor-swift-etsy-fan-sue-legal

AND, I hold on to the line "we think we know someone but the truth is that we only know the version of them they have chosen to show us" - meaning there could be so much we don't know about her.

About the dress, you need to read the motivation behind Ashish's Fall 2017 collection, which includes the dress, and his explanation behind the usage of sequins and fashion in getting a message of tolerance across. It's clearly more than a dress she just likes, because Taylor is a smart cookie, a smart girl who reads beyond the surface. Once again, this same dress was in the magazine, her instagram, account, the music video, and now the app.

http://1granary.com/interviews/ashish-use-sequins-form-protest/

DWOHT - I understand where you're coming from, but, the lines: "People started talking, putting us through our paces"; "deep fears that the world would divide us" transcend beyond a "private" relationship. While we're at it, the song "Dress" and the opening line "our secret moments in a crowded room" this line implies that they're not in private, they're in public, but no one knows they're dating because they're keeping it a secret. 'Jaylor' isn't a secret. Same goes with "everyone thinks that they know us, but they know nothing about all of this silence and patience, Pining and anticipation. My hands are shaking from holding back from you". This theme can also be heard in "don't blame me", especially in the line "and baby for you, I would fall from grace. Just to touch your face" - how would Taylor fall from grace by dating Joe? There's nothing remotely bad or taboo about dating him. He seems like a level headed serious actor, with a good reputation. It doesn't make sense.

IF Taylor actually marries Joe, and has kids with him, I will admit I'm wrong, I will delete all my Kaylor posts because I don't see the point of spreading something confirmed to be wrong. That isn't even a problem. I am of the opinion she's possibly bisexual or gay, but again, none of us truly know Taylor. Neither do you. Not even her fans who were at the SS. At the end of the day, we are fans to her, not her family, not her close group of friends. If we were her actual "friends", we'd get more than just likes on Tumblr and security controlled secret sessions. She chooses what she wants us to see, this is confirmed in her album foreword

Same question to you, if by some odd twist, Taylor eventually comes out as gay and her PR relationships were fake (Kristin Stewart anyone? Remember her and Robert Pattinson and their supposed happy relationship? She's extremely out and happy now), would you still think Jaylor was real?

Taylor is in love with Joe okay bye