#james hunt x reader

[hereticpriest]

What Happens in Ibiza

Sequel to Muse

Relationship: Niki Lauda x Reader x James Hunt

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Threesome, double penetration, spitroasting, deep throating, facefucking, oral sex (m and f receiving), handjobs, vaginal fingering, anal fingering, rimjobs, safe sex, condom use, under-negotiated kink, very mild petplay, male on male anal, anal sex, switch James Hunt, switch Niki Lauda, switch Reader, praise kink, reader goes into an overstimulated space and her partners don't immediately realise.

You knew what you got into when you married Niki Lauda. He warned you that he would forget your birthdays, and anniversaries. He warned you that he wouldn’t be good at making friends, and he wouldn’t be great in social situations. He told you that his driving was a strong priority, and that wasn’t likely to change. He would be busy with his racing season, and might have to miss out on her own work achievements and priorities. You would have to travel with him during the Formula One season, or be alone quite a bit throughout the year. If you did travel with him, you might be limited in what you could do for work throughout the year, and might have to dedicate yourself almost solely to Formula One for half the year.

What you did not expect was how frequently James Hunt would feature in your life. He visited while he was in Vienna, and again while you were back home in New York City to pack your belongings. He invited you and Niki to his home in London shortly after the 1975 season ended, but before your marriage. Three visits in a few short months, all quite impromptu but pleasant enough, with the excuse that he was in the area and thought he ‘might as well’. After visiting Ibiza for your honeymoon, Niki proceeded to buy a house there with enough privacy for the both of you to enjoy the off season together. Of course, shortly after you both finished settling in, Niki received a phone call which had him sequestered away in the house for nearly an hour while you lay out in the sun, naked as the day you were born. Your husband returns to you with a hesitant smile on his face, leaning down to cup your chest and give you a gentle squeeze from behind while pressing his lips to your cheek.

“Mouse.” He murmurs against your skin in greeting, and you know he’s about to say something he thinks you might not like. There’s a hint of hesitance to his tone that he only uses those rare times when he’s nervous about your reaction about something.

“Honey.” You reply, and he huffs a quiet laugh, stroking his hands down over your body, enjoying the sunkissed heat of your skin. His thumbs stroke over your nipples, and you hum, stretching lazily like a cat under his hands.

“That was James. He is coming to visit us.” Niki murmurs, and you roll your eyes, reaching back to tangle your fingers in his hair.

“You mean he’s coming to visit you, with the benefit of my company as a delightful bonus.” You retort, and he presses kisses down your neck to your shoulder.

“I dare say he likes you a fair bit more than me, mouse, he is just… unsure how to react with you. He is used to women who are willing to have an affair with him, and your disinterest makes him unsure how to act with you.” Niki replies, and you snort, twisting his curls around your fingers.

“I didn’t want James before we started dating.” You remind him, and Niki smiles against your skin as if that pleases him, then gently scrapes his teeth across your shoulder.

“I know. He is unused to that. Which is why he treats you like one of ‘the guys’ when he’s around, and yet he still admires you.”

“Admires me?”

“You have not seen him? He looks at what is mine, mouse. You wore that low-cut shirt in London, and he couldn’t take his eyes off of your chest. In Vienna, you wore the dress with the slit to dinner and he kept looking at your legs.” Niki replies, and you hum thoughtfully.

“I’m pretty sure I caught him looking at your ass once.” You muse, and Niki chokes on his own spit. You can’t help but laugh as you pat and rub his back, guiding him to sit on the edge of your lounge chair. Niki’s cheeks are red as he catches his breath, and you giggle a little as you skim your hand down his back to give his bum a squeeze, “I don’t blame him. It’s a very cute butt.”

Your husband gives you a flat look, but the corner of his mouth twitches, and you tap your lower lip while pouting at him. With a quiet sigh as if you’re asking for so much from him by silently demanding his affections, he leans down and kisses you softly while skimming his hand up over your bare thigh.

“He will be here in a couple of hours. You’ll need to wear a bathing suit for once.” Niki reminds you, and you raise an eyebrow at him.

“Will I?”

Niki gives you a somewhat stern look, and you begin to crack, starting to smile despite your attempts at holding back.

“What? I’m not allowed to swim naked anymore? You told me you liked watching me do things naked.” You tease, and Niki smiles a little, getting up from the chair.

“At least a bikini, mouse. You have plenty of them - let them see some sun.”

You reluctantly agree, leaning up to steal another kiss, “Why’s James coming to visit, anyways?”

“He lost his drive. Hesketh went under, and he needs a break while he looks for a new one.” Niki replies. You nod sympathetically.

“A mini vacation will be good for him.”

~

Niki leaves to pick James up a couple of hours later, and you put on some music in the house, dancing around while you change out the sheets in the guest room, set towels in the attached bathroom for him, and hang a spare robe on the back of the door. You spare a thought for the bookshelf where you’ve put all of the magazines you’ve modelled in, the unused outtakes tucked between them in mini albums. In the end, you leave them, unashamed of the work you’ve done before. James has seen your ads before anyways, it’s nothing new to him.

By the time James and Niki get back to the house, you’ve changed into a knee-length white linen skirt and a powder blue crochet crop top with your newest white bikini underneath. You greet them at the door, and James grins at the sight of you, looping his arms around you and lifting you off the ground to give you a squeeze.

“Hello darling! Look at you, the sun has somehow made you even more beautiful, hasn’t it?”

“It certainly hasn’t hurt, dear. You could use some, couldn’t you? You’ve lost some colour.” You give his cheeks a squeeze, and James laughs, reluctantly putting you down but holding your waist for a few seconds longer.

“Niki, how do you get anything done?” He asks, finally letting you go and clapping your husband on the back as the Austrian lugs his suitcase in.

“Unsuccessfully.” Niki retorts, and his frank tone of voice makes both yourself and James laugh. James follows Niki up to the guest room, chattering away with him, though you can see a certain stress and sadness in him. You leave him to Niki for now, setting out a tray upon which you put your sunscreen, the magazine you’re reading, a cocktail, some sliced fruit, and a spray bottle you’ve taken to using when you get a little overheated. You head outside to the pool again after putting on your sunglasses, putting your tray down, then taking off your top and skirt.

The boys join you soon after while you’re rubbing sunscreen into your legs, and you hum happily as Niki sits behind you to take the bottle from you. James grins widely at you, a certain sparkle in his eye that you’re especially fond of, as he strips his shirt off.

“Mind doing my back, darling?”

You laugh, patting the chair in front of you while you lean into Niki’s firm hands as he rubs your back. James hums as you rub sunscreen into his tanned skin, and you ignore the touch-starved way that he rubs your legs, as if finishing the job you’d been doing when they interrupted you. You sigh as Niki slips his arms around you to rub your stomach and chest, and James makes a rather adorable curious noise when he hears you.

“What are you two doing back there? Are you feeling each other up? You know, it’s only fair to include your guests if you’re going to be touching each other up.” Hunt teases playfully, and you roll your eyes, reaching around him to squeeze his pecs.

“There, satisfied, dear?”

“Well, I’m certainly not lonely anymore.”

Niki snorts, giving you a gentle pat on the hip and a kiss to the shoulder, “Done, mouse.”

You release James, handing him the bottle of sunscreen, then giving him a gentle push.

“Alright, both of you, get. This is my lounge chair, go get your own.” You insist, and Niki pecks your cheek before he gets up, settling in the chair to your left. You scowl at him when he steals a sip of your cocktail, but he only gives you a smug grin, laying back and pulling his hat down over his eyes so he can relax. James rubs sunscreen into his chest, stomach and arms, then wipes what remains on his face. He stretches, then dives into the pool, and you sip your cocktail as you watch him muck about.

“Niki! Get in with me.” Hunt calls, and you watch your husband peek out from under his hat sceptically.

“Why? So you can dunk me?”

“Oh, don’t be a bore. Get in with me! It’s boiling out, and you have to be overheating.”

Niki looks at you as if for support, but you simply raise an eyebrow at him.

“He’s right, love. Go swim with the big puppy dog, he’s lonely.” You hum, taking a sip of your cocktail, “Would you two like drinks? I’ll make you something.”

Both men agree to your terms, and you head back into the house, glancing back only briefly over your shoulder to catch two sets of pretty blue eyes glued to your ass. You make them both punchy little cocktails, heading back out to the pool, and beaming at the sight awaiting you. James and Niki are splashing each other, both smiling and laughing together. James’ hair is stringy, and he looks a bit like a wet dog, while Niki’s curls only seem to get curlier when wet. You pause by the back door, watching them fondly as Niki tries to dunk James, only to have his wrists grabbed, both of them wrestling for the upper hand. James’ grin is blinding as the sun, his hair flying around his head like spun gold as he tries to avoid being knocked over by your husband. In this light, he’s no longer boring, and you can’t help but smile at the sight of two handsome men play-wrestling like children.

You haven’t the heart to interrupt them, so you put the cocktails on your tray and lay back on your lounge chair to observe. It doesn’t take long for them to tire themselves out, but by the time they do, you’ve finished your cocktail and your magazine. James leans over your chair when he gets out to collect his drink, and you squeal as he drips all over you, then anchors his hands on either side of you and gives a mighty shake like a big dog.

“Niki!” You cry for help from your husband, but he only stands over you and rings out his hair over your head, “Oh, you bastard! You’re both awful men. Awful, bad, bad men.”

James laughs gleefully, slinging an arm over Niki’s shoulders, their prior wrestling forgotten with the united purpose of harassing you. You pout at them both, fleeing from your lounge chair, and only barely dodging James’ reaching hands that would no doubt try and toss you into the pool. You don’t give him a chance, circling towards the deep end, and dive into the water to swim across the pool. When you surface, you find yourself once again being watched, and you smooth your hair back out your face to peer at the boys.

“What?” You ask. James tilts his head like a confused dog, but his eyes are intense as he stares at you, and you blink at him.

“Mouse, your swimsuit is not as thick as you thought it was.” Niki comments, his own stare fixed firmly on your nipples where they show through the fabric. You glance down at yourself, raising your eyebrows with shock when you see how transparent the white bikini has gotten.

“Oh.” You hum, and James echoes you, then grunts when Niki elbows him in the ribs.

~

Dinner is a lazy affair, all three of you exhausted from the sun, the swimming, and the play fighting. You make a spread of easy but filling tapas paired with wine, so all of you can just grab what you like. You drape yourself across one of the shorter parts of the C-shaped sofa, and smile as James thumps down on the longer part, plopping his head into your lap. You pet his hair, smiling at Niki as he enters the room and claims the other short side of the sofa, draping James’ feet over his lap without a care while he nurses a glass of wine. James practically purrs as you tuck his hair behind his ear, shivering when you trace your nail around the shell of his ear.

“I hope you weren’t looking to party too much, darling. We’ve been enjoying a lazy vacation.” You muse, and James nuzzles his cheek against your thigh.

“No, this is what I wanted.” He replies, and you smile, setting your wine glass aside so you can put a couple of braids in his hair. Together, you all watch a couple of television programs and doze together, until finally, Niki gets up from the sofa to tidy up the kitchen. Taking his queue, you stroke the back of your fingers across James’ cheek, gently coaxing him awake. He yawns, stretching across your lap dramatically, and you laugh as he wiggles and fusses like a giant golden retriever.

“Okay, okay, up you get, dear.” You croon, and he obediently sits up, pecking your cheek loudly as he slips from the sofa.

“God, is it really that early? Are we going to bed at Niki-o’clock?” Hunt teases, and you snort, getting up from the sofa to drink your wine.

“It’s nearly eleven, dear, it’s far past Niki-o’clock.” You retort, stretching, nearly jumping out of your skin when Niki puts his still-slightly-damp hands on your bare sides, “Oh! Niki, your hands are cold!”

Your husband is unapologetic, wrapping his arms around your waist and putting his chin on your shoulder.

“James, if you need anything during the night, what’s mine is yours. The fridge is stocked, as is the bar cart. We’ll have breakfast in the morning, then decide on plans for the day.”

“I’ll see you both in the morning, then.” James replies, and you all head up the stairs together, splitting off at the guest room. Niki squeezes your hips as you enter your bedroom, kicking the door closed behind him, then dragging you into the bathroom with him. You take a blissfully warm and lazy shower together, and Niki promises to fuck you in the morning since Hunt is never up early and neither of you are awake enough to manage tonight. You pull on one of Niki’s shirts to sleep in, forgoing underwear, and Niki only tugs on a clean pair of boxer briefs. He drags you into his arms the moment you crawl under the sheets with him, and you sigh happily as he curls himself around you, tangling his legs with yours.

~

Warm skin brushes against your legs, and you come to consciousness quite suddenly, groaning softly as the bed dips beside you. You blindly reach out, hands sliding over planes of muscle without the normal softness that you’re used to. You let out a confused noise, and are gently hushed, warm hands gently stroking your arms and sides until you relax and melt into a sleepy puddle. The hands leave you, and you chase after them, wrapping your arms around a frame far bigger than what you’re used to. You snuggle closer, pressing your face into the bare expanse of warm back in front of you, and wedge your leg between the thighs of the body you’re clinging to. It isn’t Niki, which should be disconcerting, but the smell of it is familiar enough that your brain isn’t waking up.

Niki moans quietly, a waking-up sort of moan that tickles your brain, and the body in front of you vibrates as it once again shushes, except this time it isn’t aimed at you. Finally, you blink your eyes open and yawn as you take in the golden tan skin of the man in front of you. You reach past where your hands are currently laid on his stomach and find the softness of your husband. You put two and two together, and blink blearily as you realise that James Hunt is in bed with you, and he’s spooning your husband, while you spoon him.

“James?”

“Mmm?”

“Why are you in bed with us, dear?”

“... I was lonely.” James admits, and you sigh quietly, stroking your hands over the man’s stomach soothingly.

“So you thought it was good idea to get in bed with us?” Niki asks sleepily, his accent even thicker when he’s only just waking up. You peer over James’ body, your chin resting on his ribs in a way that you’re sure isn’t comfortable, but you couldn’t care less. Your husband hasn’t moved to try and get away from Hunt - the Brit’s arm is wrapped around him, and you can see him stroking his stomach. A smart plan. Niki is easily soothed with petting.

“I was lonely. You said what’s yours is mine.” James reminds him, and Niki huffs, stretching leisurely in Hunt’s arms. You drop your head back down onto your pillow, shifting a little to get comfortable, and James’ breath hitches. He shifts a little against you, and you grumble, petting his chest soothingly to get him to stop squirming.

“What is it, Hunt?” Niki snaps after a moment, then makes a weird squeaky sound, continuing after a suspiciously long pause, “are you hard?”

“Sorry, sorry.” James mutters, pushing at your knee gently to try and get it out from between his legs. You only obey after quite a bit of pushing.

“What is it?” You ask, and he scrunches up a little, pushing Niki’s arse away from the curve of his body.

“Your leg keeps rubbing against my dick, and you’re not wearing knickers, and I can feel it. Plus, Niki’s arse pressing back on me.” James retorts. Niki hums, and you swear you hear a hint of sympathy in his tone. You can’t help but practically purr behind the Brit as you realise he’s hard. James Hunt is hard over you and your husband. James Hunt is at least somewhat bisexual, just like you. Niki knew about you - you had discussed it before, despite having minimal experience with women, and he didn’t judge you at all. He didn’t admit to any feelings for men himself, but he wasn’t close-minded at all, so you weren’t necessarily surprised to find him feeling arousal for a man he had an emotional connection with.

“She doesn’t like wearing underwear if she doesn’t have to.” Your husband explains, a bit of heat in his voice as he glances back over his shoulder at you both. James groans, a hint higher and more submissive than you expected from him, and you pet his tummy reassuringly.

“Shh, it’s okay. Poor pup, you’re just needy, aren’t you?” You whisper, and Niki lets out a quiet, approving moan. James freezes between you both, and you sigh blissfully, sitting up and climbing on top of the Brit who snuck into your bed, straddling his lap while he lays on his back beneath you. Niki rolls over, propping himself up on his arm and peering at James with pink cheeks and desire darkened eyes.

“Is this what you wanted, James? When you crawled into our bed?” Niki asks, and you smile, leaning down to pull him up into an eager kiss while James stutters out a shaky ‘yes’ in response. Your husband sighs against your mouth, cupping your cheek, and you gently bite his lower lip.

“Are you okay with this?” You whisper, and Niki nuzzles his nose against yours, then presses your foreheads together.

“I am, mausi. Is this what you want?” He asks, and James watches you two with eager, wide eyes, his blond eyelashes fluttering as he breathes heavily.

“I suppose I could be persuaded to indulge our dear guest.” You reply with just a hint of dismissiveness in your voice, and James grabs your hips as you roll your bare cunt down on him, gasping for breath. He stares up at you with blatant desire on his face, chest heaving as he reaches out with one hand to grasp at Niki’s thigh while the other digs into your hip. Niki licks his lips, reaching out to pet your other hip, and turning his gaze on James.

“Do you have condoms? You are not fucking my wife without a condom.”

James laughs shakily, letting his head fall back on the mattress, disbelieving of how lucky he’s found himself. He lifts you so easily you let out a loud gasp, then lays you down beside your husband, who begins to strip your shirt off while Hunt heads for the door.

“In my room. I’ll be right back. Feel free to get started without me.” He calls as he practically bounds back towards his room. You immediately reach for Niki, finding him hard and aching against your palm, and you giggle. Niki curls over you to steal a couple of gentle kisses, and you arch beneath him as he sweeps his hand over your ribs to cup your breast, pinching your nipple. You roll your thumb over the head of his cock, tapping the pad of your thumb against the precum beaded at the tip to show the string of cum connecting the two.

“Ahh, my poor husband. Did the big handsome golden retriever get you hard?” You coo, and he sighs blissfully as you wrap your hand around him fully and give him a couple of strokes. Niki bats your hand away, pressing you back into the mattress while he crawls between your legs and swipes his tongue through the wet heat of your cunt. You gasp, and he pushes two fingers into you, scissoring them to spread you open. James rejoins you both with a box in hand, dropping it on the night table and smoothing his hand over Niki’s ass. Your husband moans into your cunt, and you grin, leaning up to meet James in a gentle and somewhat tentative kiss.

“You’re very occupied with his ass. You can take his boxer briefs off, if you want.” You offer to Niki’s delight, as evidenced by the way he sucks eagerly at your clit and crooks his fingers. James obediently helps Niki out of his underwear, then smoothes his hands over Niki’s ass, squeezing. You watch through half-lidded eyes as James stares, somewhat awkward and unsure. A soft laugh makes James blink at you, and you slip up from the mattress to give James’ hip a squeeze. 

“You’ve never done this before?” You ask, and he shrugs.

“Not with a man.”

“It’s not that different, darling. Niki, love, lay on your back for me. I’m going to show James what I reward you with when you’re very, very good.” You coo, and your husband is quick to follow your directions. James tilts his head curiously at the obvious excitement, and you offer James a wink as you lay on your belly on the bed and push Niki’s legs up. Gentle strokes to start with, your hand slick with spit and precum mixed, squeezing gently around the head on each upstroke. You swipe your tongue over Niki’s hole and he groans deeply, head tossed back into the pillows at the mixed sensations. James watches, fascinated, while you lap at your husband and stroke his cock, stopping briefly to roll his balls in your mouth before returning to your work. When he’s suitably relaxed and pliable, you open the night table drawer and hand James a bottle of lube. 

“Warm it up with your fingers. Go slowly - I’ve only put two fingers in him before, and mine are much smaller than yours. No such thing as too much lube, so add more if you need it. And this is a marathon, not a sprint, darling. Take your time.” You purr, your arms around James’ waist, hands stroking over his chest and stomach while he coats his fingers and rubs the viscous gel over Niki’s hole. You release James to duck into the bathroom and brush your teeth, returning to find James two fingers deep in your husband, whose hands are fisted in the sheets while he moans for more.

“It’s easier after what you did. Last time I did this, it took longer.” James admits to you as you approach, kissing across his shoulder, then wrapping your hand around him loosely. He gasps, then groans lowly, leaning back into you but continuing to fingerfuck Niki.

“Niki likes to be treated gently.” You reply softly, your voice full of love and desire in equal measure, and James looks back at you with a hint of longing in his big blue eyes, “He’s much easier to play with when he’s nice and relaxed, aren’t you, honey?”

Niki grunts an affirmative as James adds a third finger, “Show him where it is.”

You giggle, crawling onto the bed with Niki and leaning down to kiss him.

“Aww, are you missing how easy I find it every time, love? We’re not looking to make you come yet. Have patience.”

Niki frowns, and James chuckles as he crooks his fingers awkwardly, seeking but missing the mark. You would help him, but you know your husband. Prostate orgasms always take him out of commission for much longer than anything else, and you want to make this last a little. You fetch a condom and roll it onto James while he sighs blissfully at the feeling of your hands on him, though it turns into a groan as you pour a generous amount of lube in your hand and shamelessly coat his cock in it.

“He should be okay.” You murmur, and James carefully pulls his fingers out while Niki whines at the empty feeling, quickly replaced by a whimper as you notch the head of the Brit’s cock against your husband’s hole, “Go ahead, puppy. Don’t worry about making him come, I want that for myself.”

Niki makes a ‘huh?’ sound at your declaration, though it quickly turns into a deep, shaky groan as James slowly begins to push his hips forwards. You watch closely as James bottoms out, drawing moans from both himself and Niki, and you frown as James begins to pull out a little too quickly. He starts to thrust at an even pace, lost in the pleasure, while Niki scrunches up his face in discomfort but doesn’t voice any complaints. You grab James’ hips, holding him still with just the tip inside of your poor husband, digging your perfectly manicured nails into his skin a little.

“Naughty puppy. How inconsiderate. You’re being very ungrateful when we welcomed you into our bed, mutt. You have to be gentle, and take it slow. Niki hasn’t done this before.” You scold the big blond Brit, and he pants for breath, dropping his hand to rub Niki’s thigh soothingly.

“Sorry Niki, sorry.”

“Fuck off.” Niki retorts through gritted teeth, and you pout, stroking his softening cock gently.

“Was that unpleasant? Lookit you, poor thing. Lemme help, honey.” You purr, taking your husband’s cock into your mouth and giving him the softest, wettest blowjob possible just to ease him back into things. Niki tangles his fingers in your hair, breathing heavily as he starts to get hard again, and you drop your hand to stroke your fingers around his rim so that you can feel him relax. Only when you feel Niki loosen up do you pat James’ stomach again. He starts to thrust slowly, measured and gentle, and Niki grips your hair a little tighter to guide your head and keep himself interested. You guide him through it for a little while longer, bobbing your head in slow, leisurely movements until he’s starting to really enjoy the gentle thrusts.

A pouty moan leaves Niki’s lips as you let his cock slip from your mouth and slap wetly against his stomach, and you kiss your way up his body, then lay back on the bed to watch them together.

“You can hump Niki a little faster, puppy.” You purr, and James immediately speeds up, clinging to Niki’s hips for dear life, “Does he feel good?”

“So fucking good. So tight.” The Brit moans over the loud slap of skin on skin, and you smile as he lets his head fall back, stomach muscles rippling with every thrust. Niki reaches for you desperately and you lovingly curl up behind him, the back of his head pillowed on your tits while you pet his plush little tummy. You brace him as James picks up his pace a little more, losing his rhythm as he gets closer. Niki doesn’t look anywhere near coming, but you’re happy enough with that. You want him to fuck you once James is done with him, and you know he’ll be desperate, which is just how you like him.

“Are you close, pup?” You coo, and James groans out a ragged yes, struggling to make and maintain eye contact with you, “poor, desperate mutt. Go ahead and come.”

James practically howls as he gives a couple more sloppy thrusts, clinging to Niki as he comes, his fingers leaving marks in your husband’s plush thighs. He’s quick to pull out, pulling off his condom and tying it off, then heading into the master bathroom with his typical swagger, buckass naked. He returns a few moments later, collapsing onto the bed next to you both and humming pleasantly.

“Fuck, darling, you two are far more fucked up than I thought you’d be.”

“Are you complaining, mutt?” You ask, and James scoffs.

“Is that nickname going to stick? Not that I’m complaining.”

“No? Should I get you a collar?” You coo, then giggle as Niki gets up after a moment of resting his poor abused hips, dragging you across the bed towards him, “Ohh, hi honey, what could you possibly want?”

Niki manhandles you onto your stomach, and you gasp, then dissolve into eager giggles as he yanks your hips up. You give a playful little wiggle, practically purring as Niki squeezes your ass, rubbing the head of his cock against you. James watches curiously, surprised to find you being so submissive when moments before you’d been domming the shit out of him. As Niki pushes inside of you, he pushes you down into the mattress, his hand planted firmly between your shoulders. James reaches out to take one of your hands as you cling to the sheets, knitting his fingers with yours and squeezing gently.

“Fuck, mausi, you’re so wet. Have we neglected you?” Niki asks, and you moan plaintively, offering James a pout since you can’t see your husband, “was that a yes? My poor wife, taking care of me while we neglect her sweet, soft little pussy.”

James offers you a pout, worming a hand under you to squeeze your tits while he recovers, “is she tight? Do you think she could fit both of us?”

You moan at the mere idea of it, shaking your head, but Niki plants his foot in the mattress and pounds into you before you can say anything.

“She could, but not both in her cunt. She’s too tight.” Niki replies through grunts, digging his hands into your hips as sweat drips from his forehead. James chuckles, getting up onto his knees and stroking your cheek.

“Let me have your mouth for a while, darling. Once your husband is done, will you let me have you too?” He asks, and you hum, blinking glassy eyes up at him.

“Condom.” You remind him, and he sighs, pouting as he fetches another condom. He rolls it on reluctantly, and you flick your tongue over the head of his cock, kissing it gently.

“Tease.” he mutters, and you grin, then pop the head into your mouth, sucking lazily while Niki reaches around you to stroke your clit. You moan around James’ cock, and he pushes forwards a little greedily, his eyes rolling back in his head when you don’t gag. You nuzzle your nose into his pubic hair, your fingers holding the base of the condom to provide complete coverage, and James’ low rumbly groan sends shivers down your spine.

“Niki, mate, how do you not spend all day fucking her throat? Even with the rubber, she’s fantastic.” The Brit muses, and Niki grunts, stroking your clit just the way you like, the praise and gentle touches sending shivers down your spine.

“You should feel her raw. My wife is talented - her clever little tongue works magic, and her cunt is so sweet, the way she sucks me dry. She loves it when I come inside of her.” Niki rasps, and you hum your agreement around the length of James’ cock, lazy little bobs of your head encouraging the Brit to grab your hair and hold on. You pull back as you get close to the edge, not wanting to accidentally bite, and Niki speeds up his thrusts to that sloppy but eager rhythm he always melts down to when he’s about to come.

“Can I come on your face, darling?” James asks, and you blink at him, then shake your head and prop yourself up a little.

“Gimme a pearl necklace.” You purr, and Niki accommodates your fun by pulling you back against his chest instead of shoving you down into the mattress. His hips stutter as he gets closer, and his rhythm on your clit suffers, but you take over for him. He groans as he fills you up, his hands digging into your hips tight enough to bruise. James paints your chest and neck with cum a moment later after tearing off the condom, his fingers tangled in your hair, holding your head back almost lovingly.

You stroke your clit, whining plaintively when Niki pulls out to avoid oversensitivity, and you roll onto your back. Niki pants beside you, snuggling up to your side and slipping his hand between your legs, pushing two fingers into you and crooking them until he finds your spot. He strokes in time with you, peppering kisses across your cheeks, eyelids, temple and finally your lips until you come with a ragged cry that sounds almost ripped from you. You pull your hand away, but James simply replaces it with his own, skillfully strumming your clit while Niki grins against your shoulder and plays along.

“Wait, wait, s’too much.” You mumble, grasping for James’ wrist, but he simply grabs your hand in his free hand and pins it above your head.

“You deserve another.” He coos, and Niki immediately joins in, stroking your hair with his free hand while he devastates you with the other.

“You did so good for us, mein mausi. Take another, let us treat you right. You’ll let James fuck you after, won’t you? I think he deserves the pleasure of your sweet cunt.” Niki whispers praise against your ear, and you arch between them, lip caught between your teeth as they bring you hurtling towards the edge so quickly after the last orgasm. It doesn’t take long to get you there, between their filthy praises, their skilled fingers, and Niki’s mouth softly pressing butterfly kisses across your face. You scream this time when you come, head thrown back, grasping at the sheets so tightly you nearly rip them.

While James fetches another condom, Niki coaxes you through the aftermath, his love whispered sweetly directly against your ear as if it were too precious to be heard by anyone else. You let Niki clean you up with his tongue despite it being far too sensitive, whimpers escaping you that only seem to make him more eager. James gives him a gentle shove out of the way, already a little over half hard and sheathed in a condom, his eyes glazed over with eager desire.

“That thing is demonic. There’s no way his refractory period is that low.” You mutter, and Niki snorts, kissing your temple.

“Enjoy it, mausi.” He murmurs, holding your legs open as James slaps his cock against your cunt none too gently. The Brit sighs as he grinds himself against you, then notches the head against your hole and mercilessly thrusts into you, balls deep in one go. Niki hums a little at the sight, sliding his fingers through yours and giving your hand a gentle squeeze.

“God, you’re still tight.” James growls, and you gasp for breath as he sets an almost cruel pace, rutting into you like the animal you claimed he was. Your breasts bounce with every thrust, and you can see Niki staring at them approvingly.

“Good, fuck her hard. It makes her tits jiggle.” Niki instructs, and James gives a devilish grin that makes you squirm a little. You squeeze Niki’s hand tightly, and he kisses your knuckles soothingly as if he didn’t just tell his dear friend to fuck you hard and make your boobs bounce. Each thrust makes you cry out, tossing your head back into the sheets as the overstimulation makes your nerves sizzle. It’s too much, too fast, but neither James nor Niki seem sympathetic to your plight. Niki releases your hand to instead strum your clit, and James pushes your legs up a bit so he can fuck you deeper, until you can practically feel him in your lungs. You clench up, throwing your head back as you come so suddenly you barely even know what’s happened to you.

“Yeah, that’s it, come on my cock, darling. Let go for us.” James moans, and Niki echoes him, stroking his hand up over your stomach to gently soothe you while he whispers in your ear.

“You’re so beautiful, mausi. So fucking perfect for us.”

You start to drift a bit, lost in sensation, too much and not enough and overwhelming in the best and worst ways. You’re a conflicted mess. You can hear Niki whispering to you, and James panting as he ruts into you, but you can’t understand what Niki’s saying, let alone muster the strength to respond. A slap to your clit jolts you, and you cry out, tears in your eyes as Niki says something in an angry tone, followed by gentle stroking against your cheek that makes you blink to try and see through the blur. James groans above you like he’s been shot, and you shudder as he pulls out, leaving you empty and shivering.

“Mausi?” Niki asks, and you blink at him through the slight blur of tears as sensation floods back in, first sight, then sound, then the smell of Niki’s cologne, “mouse? Are you okay?”

“Is she alright?” James asks, voice shaky, his breathing heavy as he lays down beside you and brushes a hand over your stomach. Niki pets your hair back, and you lean into his touch.

“I’m okay.” You croak, and Niki breathes out a sigh of relief, “I just got… overstimulated or something.”

James presses a soft kiss to your cheek, “I’m sorry, darling. I didn’t realise you were that out of it.”

You hum, leaning into his lips, and blinking your eyes closed.

“S’okay, I didn’t expect it. Couldn’t warn you.” You mumble, and Niki kisses you softly, helping you crawl up the bed to curl up with him.

“You need to sleep, mouse,” he purrs, and you stretch and wiggle to get comfy, “we can play more tomorrow if you’re up for it.”

“Can we?” James asks, like he thought this was a one time only thing. You shrug, nuzzling your face against Niki’s chest.

“Sure. C’mere, come cuddle me. We’ll talk about it in the morning.”

~

After a luxurious shower in which Niki eagerly stakes his claim, and a quiet breakfast in which James does his damndest to eat you out of house and home, you all curl up on the sofa to figure out what you’d all like to do. A visit to the beach occupies most of your day together, along with lunch on the boardwalk. You head home together, sun-drunk and happy, and in James’ case perhaps a little tipsy as well. You only had one drink, and Niki didn’t drink at all since he was driving.

Once you get home, you make everyone cocktails, and you raise an eyebrow when you return to the living room to find Niki and James whispering with each other. Niki pulls you into his lap, stroking his hands up your bare legs before taking his cocktail from you. James takes a sip of his, then leans down to peck your cheek, leaving his drink on the coffee table as he runs upstairs to ‘get something’. You give Niki a suspicious look.

“What are you two planning?” you ask, and Niki nuzzles against your ear, then takes another sip of his drink.

“Debauchery.” He retorts with a soft laugh, and you giggle, nuzzling your face into his neck.

“What kind?”

“Which of us would you prefer fuck your ass, mouse?” Niki asks instead of answering your question, and you practically purr, leaning up to kiss him softly. He guides your shirt off, then wiggles your shorts down over your hips, discarding both.

“You. Puppy’s sloppy and overeager.” You reply as James thumps down the stairs with a bottle of lube and condoms in his hands. He grins at you, shameless in his mischief as he tosses both onto the sofa then tears his shirt over his head, “See what I mean?”

Niki hums thoughtfully, nodding against your shoulder while he strips off your bikini as well. “Lay on your stomach, mouse.”

You obey immediately, and James watches with an eyebrow raised as Niki digs his hands into your back. You moan loudly, clinging to the couch cushions as Niki makes you melt underneath him with ease. He’s done it enough times that he knows your body as if it’s his own, and it’s not long before he has you relaxed enough that he’s sure you can handle getting prepped. James watches as Niki pours lube into his hand and warms it up, then coats you liberally, fingering a bit of it into your cunt then trailing back to your ass. He pushes one finger into you, slow but steady, and you moan quietly as you relax even further to make it easier.

“God, she takes it well. You do this often, Nik?” James asks, and Niki laughs, adding a bit more lube and a second finger.

“It was a honeymoon gift. She’s indulged me once or twice since then.” He replies, working you open slowly and carefully. James hums, sitting close to your head and running his hands gently over your back to continue the massage Niki has been giving you earlier.

“If we do this again, I’m getting an STD test first so you’ll let me go without a condom.” James mutters, and you laugh, patting his thigh soothingly. You wiggle your bottom, and Niki grins as he fucks three fingers into your pert little ass. You thought you would be nervous about this, but you’re completely at ease, and even a little eager to take them both. You know Niki will take care of you, and so will James, even if he’s a little overeager.

“Condom, James.” Niki reminds him, and James eagerly obeys, rolling a rubber on and sipping his cocktail. You crawl into James’ lap, letting him pull you down on his cock, and you hum as you snuggle up against his chest lazily. Niki situates himself behind you, stroking your back as he presses his cock into you slowly. You’re more full than you’ve ever been before, and you moan softly, almost eagerly, as Niki bottoms out. He takes over the pace, though James does bounce you in his lap, and you find yourself constantly full of one of them as they seem to match paces. Whenever Niki pushes in, James is pulling out, and whenever James thrusts up into you, Niki pulls out.

It feels like endless pleasure. A never-ending fall into hedonistic ecstasy between your husband and one of his closest friends. Niki pants against the back of your neck, murmuring praise against your skin while he chases his pleasure. You can feel his sweat drip against your back and roll down your spine, mixing with your own, and you cling to James’ shoulders desperately as the pressure and pleasure builds inside of you. The Brit strokes your stomach and breasts, murmuring gentle praise to you about how beautiful you are, and how good you are. His voice raises in pitch, a heady moan slipping from his lips as he gets closer, but Niki comes first, groaning raggedly and biting down on your shoulder to quiet himself.

James strokes your clit as Niki pulls out, thrusting up eagerly into you, his other hand clinging to your waist. He makes you come with his lips around your nipple, thumb rubbing against your clit while he bucks eagerly into you. He follows you soon after, his sweaty forehead smacking into your shoulder, a deep groan vibrating in his chest. James lays you down in Niki’s arms as he gets up from the couch, stretching as he walks naked to his bathroom. He discards the condom, washing up, then rejoins you both and collapses into your waiting arms. None of you feel fit to move. Niki lays his head on your chest, while James lays his head on Niki’s stomach in a sweaty little cuddle pile that none of you seem eager to abandon.

James leaves early the following morning, and is signed with McLaren shortly afterwards, his mood cheered up the moment he gets the news. He calls you both to celebrate, and you promise to all see each other when the next Formula One season starts. 

Perhaps, even, for a round two.

[simplyholl]

Hunted

Summary: Hydra hosts a training exercise for their super soldiers. You can run, but you can't hide from the Winter Soldier.

Pairing: Dark Winter Soldier x F. Reader

Warnings: Smut. 18+ Only. Minors DNI. This is a dark fic. Non con. Death.

See my Masterlist Here

You ran as hard as your feet would carry you. You were terrified, shaking so hard you were surprised that you could even move. Footsteps approached quickly, your breath hitches as you make a decision. You could run, but the super soldier could easily catch up to you. Or you could stay where you are and pray that you are hidden well enough that he won't find you.

Last month, Hydra caught your uncle's company trying to take them down. They killed all the men that worked there and captured all the women. They brought you all to cells under their headquarters. They fed you three meals a day, stating you all would need your strength for what they had planned.

This morning, you learned what they had meant. You were all brought out to the edge of the woods. The man in charge told you that they were training their super soldiers today. They would be practicing their hunting skills. A large van pulled up, and out came ten super soldiers. You looked around, counting the women who were with you. There were twenty-three of you. A second van halted to a stop beside the other. Two large men drug out another.

He was chained up, arms behind his back, black mask almost like a muzzle covered his mouth. His dark, shoulder length hair was messy, piercing blue eyes locking on you. You felt like you were going to faint. The Winter Soldier was the most brutal of all the super soldiers. A skilled assassin, he was sent on Hydra's most important missions. He did all their dirty work.

The Hydra leader who brought you outside explained the rules to the prisoners and soldiers. They were going to give you all an hour head start. Your job was to hide from the men. If they found you, they could do whatever they wanted with you as a reward. Bile rose in your throat, turning the contents of your stomach sour. Some of you wouldn't come out of this alive. But if you were fortunate enough to make it until sunrise, you would be free.

The footsteps grow closer, you close your eyes hoping he won't notice the footprints you had left in the mud. Then you see him, the man was tall, blonde hair shaved off. He walked toward the bushes you were hiding in. Your hand flies to your mouth to hide your cries. To your dismay, one escapes anyway. The soldier's head whips toward the noise, across the way from you.

You realize it wasn't you who cried too loudly. The soldier smiles wickedly, reaching for the poor woman who just gave up her hiding spot. He flings her out of the bushes onto the hard ground. More tears fall when you notice that it's Claire, the secretary from your uncle's failed company.

The soldier begins pawing at her as she tries to fight him off. It's no use. He holds her down with one knee on her torso, as he strips off his clothes. "You're my second one today." He brags. "Let's see if you're luckier than the last one. I choked her too hard." His evil laugh echoes through the quiet forest. When he rips Claire's clothing from her shaking body, you take the opportunity to run.

He looks up when he hears you leaving your shelter. "I'll catch up to you next!" He yells after you. The sun has started setting, you take a precious minute to catch your breath. You know if you stop for too long, you'll lose your momentum, or someone could catch up to you. You hear the screams and cries of your fellow prisoners as you make your way further into the woods. You search for a new place to hide, since it would be dark soon.

They could have at least equipped you with flashlights, you think to yourself. That was the whole point of all of this, wasn't it? You weren't meant to survive. Hydra expected the super soldiers to kill most of you. The women who survived would be brought back to the prison, probably made to work for them now that their spirits had been broken.

It was almost too dark to continue, so you took shelter in a cluster of bushes, shrinking yourself as small as you could underneath it. Night fell, and you laid on the cold ground, the horrendous sounds of the others getting caught filled the air. Finally, you rested your eyes. You needed the rest if you were going to make until the morning.

You woke up, sensing someone was nearby. You silently prayed that it was just another prisoner and not a threat. You release the shaky breath you were holding when they leave the area. The dark sky turns reddish - pink and you sigh with relief. It shouldn't be long now. Sunrise was so close you could almost taste your freedom.

You close your eyes, hoping that when you opened them the next time, this torture would be over. Your few moments of peace were interrupted when the blonde super soldier from earlier reached down into the bushes, pulling you up by your hair. Your scream rips through the woods, the soldier slings you back onto the ground, kicking you. "Shut up, bitch. I told you I was coming for you. You're my sixth, and from the looks of it, my last." He gestures to the sky.

He rips your shirt from your body. You try to cover yourself, but he moves your hands away. A metal hand wraps around the soldier's neck, a sickening crunch filling your ears as The Winter Soldier snaps it with ease. The soldier slumps over, his lifeless body landing with a thud.

"Mine." The Winter Soldier states, blue eyes locked on your exposed bra. A cold metal finger slips under the bra between your breasts, tearing it from your body with no effort. "No please! I almost made it. Please don't do this!" You cry, pleading with him. His hands find your breasts, squeezing roughly. His eyes land on your peaked nipples, taking them between his fingers.

He twists and pulls too roughly. When he's finished his assault on them, he reaches for his face, removing the black mask from his mouth. He's beautiful, you think for a split second. His blue eyes and pouty, full lips seemed like they didn't belong on the same man who was trained to kill. "Like what you see?" He smirks, when he notices you staring at his face. He pushes your breasts together, face lowering toward them. He runs his tongue from one pointed nipple to the other. Chapped lips taking one between them, sucking harshly.

He bites down, pulling your nipple with his teeth. You cry out, hands on his face trying to push him away. He chuckles, as you fight him, biting down your torso to your pants. He pulls them down along with your panties, discarding them immediately. One thick finger runs through your folds, disappointment evident as it comes out dry. "You're not even wet for me? We can't have that. I won't fit if you're not ready."

You shiver at his words. You didn't want to know how big he was. You had studied the super soldier serum enough at your old job to know that the serum enhanced everything. He brings his mouth down against your core, lips brushing your clit. He swirls his tongue around it, metal arm hooking under your legs to bring you closer. His full lips tug on your clit, you can't help but moan for him.

"That's it, good girl. If you're good for me, I'll convince them to let me keep you." You spit at him, kicking your legs, to push him away. "Why would I want that?" He smiles, because Hydra's gonna kill anyone left in these woods when this is over." You gasp, you should have known. "You didn't really think they would just let you go? You know too much. They will let me keep you as my little plaything though. All I have to do is say the word."

You didn't doubt him for a second. “Stop fighting." He commands, lowering his face again. His nose brushes your clit while he works his tongue inside you. You try to fight back, but he misinterprets your movements. He thinks you're enjoying it now. "That's it." The Winter Soldier suckles your swollen clit, hot tongue lapping up every drop of arousal. You bite your lips so hard; it bleeds trying to keep a moan in.

He grabs your chin, jerking your face towards him. "Do not hold back from me, kitten." His warm tongue drags over you slowly before his plump lips suction around your clit. Your thighs close against his ears as he draws a forceful orgasm out of you, legs trembling as you flood his face. Your moan rips through your throat, earning a satisfied smile from the soldier.

He spreads your legs with one hand, his other freeing his hard cock. You were right about the size of it. You were so fortunate that he got you wet first. You'd be lucky if he didn't split you in half. He plunges inside you, you squirm from the painful way he entered you. "Hold still." He says, holding your stomach down. "I can't, it hurts too much." You whine. The Winter Soldier rolls his eyes, lifting you like a rag doll.

He sits on the ground, lowering you onto him. This position was worse for you. He hit even deeper than before. But he could hold you better this way. His metal arm snakes around your waist, holding you close. He bounces you on his cock, your arms wrap around his neck. His fingers dig into your hips as you get used to it and start to grind on him.

Your clit brushes his dark curls as you ride him. "I knew you would be worth it." He grunts. "I wanted you the moment I saw you this morning. I found you immediately. You're not great at hiding, you know. But I waited. I knew it would be better if I let you think you could escape." He chuckles, "You should have seen those other broads, they would piss themselves when they saw me. But I only wanted you, so I left them for the others."

His dark pants rub against your thighs as he fucks into you. You roll your hips, trying to get this over with as quickly as possible. "You feel incredible." He moans into the crook of your neck. You scratch at his leather clad back, as the Winter Soldier's mouth latches onto the exposed skin of your neck. He sucks harshly, making sure it will leave a mark. You clench around him as he cums inside you.

His metal hand reaches between you, icy digits colliding with your heat. His thumb circles your clit, causing you to unravel. You shake in his arms, too exhausted to move as he pulls you off him. He takes his shirt off, handing it to you. "Put this on. I don't want anyone looking at my little doll." You take it, looking up at the sun coming up in the distance.

Tags

@cindylynn @wheredafandomat @multifandom-worlds @loz-3 @megharat-barnes-reid @kats72 @crimson25 @mochie85 @cakesandtom @lokidokieokie @theallknown213 @alexakeyloveloki @tmilover1993 @yeaiamme2 @pigeonmama @yeehawbrothers @lokischambermaid @fictive-sl0th @nomajdetective @goblingirlsarah @foxherder @weirdothatwritess @silver-tongue-taken-to-bed @freegardenbanananeck @lamentis-10 @jainaeatsstars @queenshu @justsebstan

[pucksandpower]

Party Girl

Happy Nation: A Series of Standalone Fics

Logan Sargeant x Hunt!Reader

Summary: Logan tries to save a notorious party girl from herself (or in which going wild runs in the Hunt family)

Warnings: illicit substances and peer-pressure

The nightclub’s bass thumps through Logan’s chest as the trio approaches the entrance. Lando and Oscar turn to him with matching grins.

“You ready for this, mate?” Lando asks.

Logan eyes the mass of people spilling out onto the sidewalk. “Is this really a good idea?”

“Of course!” Oscar claps him on the shoulder. “It’s gonna be brilliant. Especially with you keeping an eye on the hostess.”

“Me?” Logan’s brow furrows.

Lando nods. “You’re our designated driver tonight, so you’ll be the soberest one here. We need you to keep Y/N from going too far off the rails.”

“Why me though? I barely know her.”

“Exactly!” Oscar exclaims. “She doesn’t really know you either, so she’ll actually listen instead of brushing you off like she does with the rest of us.”

Logan frowns. “I don’t know, guys ...”

“Oh, come on!” Lando wheedles. “You’ve heard the stories about James Hunt. Partying is in her DNA. We just need to make sure she doesn’t take after her grandad too much tonight.”

With a sigh, Logan relents. “Alright, fine. I’ll do my best to keep her out of trouble.”

The two grin and clap him on the back before leading the way inside. The throbbing music and flashing lights assault Logan’s senses as they enter. He scans the crowd, quickly spotting a vaguely familiar mane of untamed waves.

You’re laughing uproariously at something one of your friends said, drink sloshing precariously in your hand. Your cheeks are already flushed, eyes bright with intoxication and mirth. A pang of concern flutters in Logan’s chest — Lando and Oscar weren’t kidding about keeping an eye on you.

Making his way through the press of bodies, Logan sidles up next to you. You glance over with a brilliant smile.

“Heyyy, you made it!”

“Yeah, uh, hi,” Logan replies, suddenly feeling awkward. “Your friends invited me to, you know, keep things under control.”

You giggle. “Under control? What fun is that?”

Taking a swig of your drink, you spin away to dance with your friends, moving your hips enticingly. Logan swallows hard, trying not to stare. This is going to be harder than he thought.

The evening blurs by in a kaleidoscope of colors and sounds. Wherever you go, Logan follows at a respectful distance. He rebuffs anyone trying to offer you illicit substances and intervenes whenever your friends get too rowdy.

A few times you shoot him annoyed glares, but he just shrugs apologetically. He’s only doing what Lando and Oscar asked. Besides, he reasons, better to have you mad at him than in real danger.

As the hour grows later, your movements become more uncoordinated, laughter louder and words more slurred. Logan hovers closer, concern mounting.

“Ohhh, Logannnnn,” you croon, draping yourself over him. “You’re sooo stuffy. Live a little!”

He gently extracts himself from your embrace. “I think you’ve lived enough for tonight, Y/N.”

Pouting, you turn away petulantly. Logan watches as a few of your more unscrupulous friends surround you with sly grins. Alarm spikes through him when he sees one of them press something into your palm.

“Hey!” Pushing forward, he places himself between you and them. “Back off. She’s not interested.”

You blink at him owlishly while your friends sneer.

“Who’re you to decide for her, pretty boy?”

“Someone who actually cares if she’s okay.” Logan holds his ground.

With a drunken giggle, you lean against his back. “S’ok, Logieee. Lemme have some fun!”

“No, Y/N.” He spins to face you, gripping your shoulders firmly. “That stuff is bad news. You don’t want it, trust me.”

Your eyes are glazed, but you search his face like you’re trying to understand. One of your friends makes another attempt to press the little baggie into your hand. Without thinking, Logan bats it away. It goes flying across the club, spilling white powder everywhere.

“Dude!” Your friend shouts, outraged.

Logan doesn’t give them a chance to react further. Scooping you up in his arms, he starts carrying you away from the crowd. You’re tiny and warm against his chest, still giggling faintly.

“Mmm, Logan ... gonna getcha in trouble ...”

“I’ll take my chances,” he mutters.

Pushing his way through the throngs of people, Logan finally breaks free into the cool night air. He sets you on your feet, but keeps a steadying hand on your waist when you sway unsteadily.

Up close like this, he can make out the flushed skin across your nose, the flecks of light reflecting in your warm eyes. For a moment you just gaze at each other, the sounds of the party muffled behind the club’s doors.

Then your brow furrows. “Why’d ya stop me? I was jus’ havin’ fun.”

Logan shakes his head slowly. “That kind of fun isn’t good for you, Y/N. Your friends, they ... they weren’t looking out for your best interests back there.”

“You don’ even know me!” You protest, pushing away from him on unsteady feet.

Without thinking, Logan catches your hands in his. They’re so tiny, delicate, yet topped with nails sharp enough to take an eye out. Just like the rest of you — an enigmatic mix of fragile beauty and uncompromising tenacity.

“You’re right, I don’t really know you,” he admits. “But I know that you’re strong. Braver and tougher than anyone gives you credit for. And you don’t need that junk to be the life of the party.”

For a long moment, you simply stare at him, eyes wide. Then, slowly, you nod. A few stray tendrils of hair fall across your face and Logan’s fingers itch to brush them back. He tamps down the urge.

“M’sorry I made a scene back there,” you mumble, averting your gaze.

“Hey.” Logan ducks his head to catch your eye again. “Don’t be sorry. Those people, they ...” He shakes his head in disgust. “You deserve better friends than that.”

Pink dusts your cheeks as the corners of your mouth tick upwards. “You’re sweet, Logan. A real gentleman.”

“I just call it like I see it,” he replies with a shrug.

You laugh softly then, a warm, rich sound that sends tingles down Logan’s spine. When you speak again, your voice is clearer, more sober.

“I guess tonight got a little out of hand. Sometimes I go too far trying to live up to the reputation of my last name. It’s stupid, I know.”

“Hey, we all have things we’re trying to prove.” Logan squeezes your hands reassuringly. “But you don’t have to prove anything to me, Y/N. I can already see how amazing you are.”

For a beat, you simply stare at him, eyes shining. Then, surging up on your tiptoes, you throw your arms around his neck and kiss him hard.

Logan freezes for half a second before melting into the embrace, pulling you flush against him. His fingers tangle in your hair as he kisses you back with everything he has.

When you finally break apart, breathless and flushed, Logan rests his forehead against yours.

“Wow,” is all he can think to say.

You grin impishly up at him. “Now there’s a party I wouldn’t mind getting carried away at.”

Logan can’t help but laugh. Tucking you into his side, he presses a kiss to your temple. “Let’s get out of here. I’ll take you anywhere you want to go.”

***

Logan jolts awake to the sound of insistent pounding on his hotel room door. Squinting against the bright sunlight filtering through the curtains, he rubs the sleep from his eyes and shuffles to answer it.

“About damn time!” Lando’s voice greets him as soon as the door opens. “Do you know how long we’ve been stuck outside?”

Oscar shoulders past Logan into the room. “Yeah, mate. Abandoning your friends at the club? Not cool.”

Logan’s brow furrows in confusion until the previous night’s events come trickling back. The party, the near miss with the drugs, getting you safely away ...

His gaze drifts to the rumpled bed across the room where you’re just starting to stir, sheets tangled around your legs. A soft smile tugs at Logan’s lips as he watches you blink owlishly.

“Earth to Logan?” Lando waves a hand in front of his face. “You still with us?”

“What? Yeah, sorry.” Logan drags his attention back to the two drivers. “Look, I can explain about last night ...”

“No need to explain why you ditched us,” Oscar interjects with a suggestive wink toward the bed. “We can figure that part out for ourselves.”

You sit upright then, the sheets pooling around your waist as you rub your eyes. “Whas’ goin’ on?”

“Well, well!” Lando exclaims with a salacious grin. “If it isn’t the life of the party herself! Get up to any ... extracurriculars last night?”

Heat creeps up the back of Logan’s neck as you glance between the three of them in sleepy bewilderment. A strangled laugh escapes Oscar’s lips as the realization hits both of them. You and Logan lock eyes from across the room, equally mortified.

“No, wait! It’s not what it looks like!” Logan splutters.

Lando claps a hand on his shoulder with a pitying look. “It’s alright, mate. You don’t have to be ashamed about finally getting some action.”

“But I didn’t!” Logan insists, running a flustered hand through his hair. “Y/N, tell them!”

Untangling yourself from the sheets, you slide off the bed — giving everyone an eyeful of the fact that you’re only wearing one of Logan’s hoodies. His breath catches in his throat because damn if you don’t look incredible drowning in his clothes.

Your bare feet pad across the carpet until you’re standing before him, fingers playing with the worn cotton hem. “He’s right, you two. We didn’t ... you know.”

Hurt flashes across Logan’s face before he can squelch it back down. Right, of course you wouldn’t want that after all the lines he crossed last night. You’d been drunk and vulnerable and now you were regretting everything, including the–

“We kissed! But it doesn’t have to mean anything,” he blurts out, not meeting anyone’s eyes. “I got Y/N out of a bad situation and we may have, uh, gotten a little carried away in the heat of the moment. But she was drunk and it won’t happen again, I swear.”

An awkward silence falls over the room, broken only by Lando’s snort of laughter. “No rizz, this one.”

Logan’s jaw clenches. He knew they’d tease him about it, but he’s a grown man and he doesn’t need to take it from the likes of–

“Logan.”

Your voice is soft but it cuts through the embarrassment swirling in his mind. You take his face gently in your hands and he’s helpless but to meet your warm gaze.

“What if I want it to mean something?”

The air whooshes out of him in a surprised breath. His hands find your waist of their own accord like it’s the most natural thing in the world. “Y-You do?”

Behind you, Oscar groans. “God, he’s so hopeless.”

“I think it’s sweet!” Lando retorts. “Innocent, you know? Like a puppy getting all flustered.”

Logan blocks them out, his whole world narrowing to the amused, almost fond smile playing across your lips. You nod, leaning further into his embrace.

“I meant what I said last night, Logan. You’re the sweetest, most caring guy I’ve ever met. And I like you.” Your nose wrinkles adorably. “A lot, actually.”

He blinks rapidly, certain his heart is about to burst out of his chest. “Y/N, I ... I like you too. So much.”

Laughing that rich, warm laugh of yours, you loop your arms around his neck and rise up on your tiptoes. Logan meets you halfway, melting into the heated press of your lips against his.

Catcalls and wolf-whistles finally penetrate the happy bubble enveloping you both. You break the kiss with a breathless giggle, burrowing your face into the crook of Logan’s neck.

“Oi, lovebirds!” Oscar hollers. “Get a room!”

“Yeah, we’ve already got one!” Logan shoots back, surprising himself with the retort. He winks cheekily at you and you positively beam in response, eyes crinkling at the corners.

“Alright, that’s our cue!” Lando steers Oscar toward the door. “Don’t do anything we wouldn’t do, you crazy kids!”

The door slams behind them, leaving you and Logan alone in blissful quiet. His arms tighten around your waist, keeping you pressed flush against him. For a few heartbeats, you simply drink each other in, basking in the unfamiliar but not unwelcome feelings bubbling up.

Eventually you break the spell with a featherlight brush of your lips against the corner of Logan’s mouth. “So, was that too forward? I shouldn’t have just sprung that on you ...”

“No!” He rushes to reassure you. “God, no. I’ve never been more sure about anything in my life.”

You poke his chest lightly, eyes dancing with mirth. “Not even racing?”

Logan chuckles, tucking a stray curl behind your ear. “Okay, maybe one other thing. But you’re definitely in the top two.”

Winding your arms back around his neck, you arch one brow mischievously. “Only top two? I’ll have to work on that ...”

His breath catches in his throat at the playful promise in your tone. “I, uh ... I wouldn’t be opposed to that.”

As you lean in to kiss him again, Logan can’t help but silently thank Lando and Oscar for dragging him to that party. True, the night didn’t go exactly as expected. But he wound up with the greatest prize of all — you, here in his arms, carefree and happy and perfect in every way.

Like the gentleman his mama raised him to be, Logan vows silently to cherish every moment with you. After all, only a fool would look a gift horse like you in the mouth.

***

Adrenaline still thrums through Logan’s veins as he exits parc fermé, helmet tucked under his arm. His cheeks ache from the wide grin stretched across his face — a double points finish was exactly what Williams needed.

Alex falls into step beside him, equally elated after their impressive showing on the track today. They did good, really good. Logan can’t wait to celebrate with the whole team.

As they approach the Williams garage, a familiar head of hair catches Logan’s eye. You’re standing front and center, bouncing on the balls of your feet with poorly contained excitement. A large bakery box is clutched in your hands, the elaborate logo on the lid leaving little doubt as to its expensive contents.

Logan’s grin widens impossibly further. Of course you’d be here with treats in tow, always ready to turn any occasion into a party. His heart swells with affection just watching you eagerly await his and Alex’s return.

The rest of the team notice their arrival and erupt into cheers, crowding around to clap the drivers on the back with jubilant congratulations. You hang back, though your whole face is lit up with unabashed pride.

“Nice one out there, lads!” An engineer calls over the ruckus.

“About time we had a good points haul,” Another mechanic agrees.

Logan waves off the compliments with a bashful duck of his head. The team has been through so much in recent seasons — they deserve this moment more than he does.

“Alright, alright! Give the boys some space to breathe!” A familiar voice rings out.

You shove your way through the throngs of people, bounding right up to Logan with a brilliant grin. He has a split second to brace himself before you launch into his arms, nearly sending him toppling backward with the force of your enthusiasm.

“You were brilliant!” You exclaim, planting an exuberant kiss on his cheek that has him blushing furiously. “Both of you! I’m so proud!”

Alex chuckles fondly as you untangle yourself from Logan just enough to loop an arm around the other man’s shoulders. “We couldn’t have done it without the team’s hard work. You should be proud of them.”

“Oh, I am!” You turn your beaming smile on the rest of the crew. “Which is why I brought a little celebratory treat!”

Holding up the bakery box with a waggle of your brows, you peel back the lid to reveal a massively decadent-looking chocolate cake. It’s one of the most elaborate confections Logan has ever laid eyes on.

A reverent hush falls over the assembled group as they all lean in to get a better look. The air is suddenly thick with the rich scent of cocoa and buttercream frosting.

“Blimey, Y/N! That must’ve set you back a pretty penny!” Alex exclaims.

You wave him off with a casual flap of your hand. “Oh, please! You don’t even want to know how many races I’ve brought an expensive cake to just in case. I’m just glad I finally got to use this one!”

A ripple of laughter rolls through the crew at that. Logan shakes his head in fond exasperation, equal parts endeared and unsurprised by your extravagant gesture.

When your gaze lands on him again, warmth blooms in his chest at the open adoration shining in your eyes. You look at him like he’s the most impressive thing you’ve ever seen, not some lucky racer who simply played a tiny part in today’s success.

Liquid courage from the race still thrumming through his veins, Logan acts on impulse. Plucking the cake box deftly from your grip, he passes it off to a bewildered Alex before cupping your face in his hands and kissing you soundly.

A startled squeak quickly melts into a pleased hum as you melt against him, looping your arms around his neck to pull him closer. Logan pours every ounce of his pride and affection for you into the heated press of his lips, uncaring of the captive audience for once.

Hoots and hollers finally break through the rosy haze fogging Logan’s mind. He breaks the kiss with a breathless chuckle, thumbs brushing over the delightfully flushed apples of your cheeks.

“Get a room, you two!” Alex hollers with a roll of his eyes.

The rest of the crew quickly devolves into jokes and ribbing at your expense, but Logan couldn’t care less. With you smiling up at him like he hung the moon, the rest of the world simply falls away.

“You taste like chocolate,” he murmurs, brushing his nose against yours.

The impish grin you shoot him in return makes his heart stutter. “Well, it wouldn’t be a proper party without dessert.”

An arm slings around Logan’s shoulders, disrupting the little bubble you’ve found yourselves cocooned in. He startles, having completely forgotten about the dozens of other people still milling about.

“Well isn’t this just precious!” Gaetan, Logan’s race engineer, gives him an affectionate shake. “Young love blossoming right here in the garage!”

Red blooms high on Logan’s cheeks even as your melodic giggles wash over him. He scratches the back of his neck sheepishly.

“We’re not that young.”

“Could’ve fooled me!” Gaetan retorts with a bark of laughter. “You two have more spark than the rest of the kids around here combined.”

Your hand finds Logan’s, tangling your fingers together as you lean bodily into his side. For a fleeting moment, he allows himself to bask in the happiness surrounding him. It’s like floating, secure in the knowledge that you’ll always be right here to keep him grounded.

“You know,” you begin softly, batting your lashes up at Logan. “This might just be my new favorite party.”

A surprised huff of laughter escapes him. But really, he shouldn’t be so shocked. From the moment he met you, it was clear you had an unparalleled zest for life. You see the joy and potential for a good time in every single occasion. It’s one of the many, many things Logan loves about you.

“Your favorite, huh?” He bends to press his forehead to yours, drinking in your radiant smile. “I’ll remember this one, then.”

Because no matter how many parties, races, or adventures you two share moving forward, Logan vows to cherish each and every one with you by his side. After all, every single moment is worth celebrating when you get to spend it with the person you love most.

[maxillness]

November Uploading Schedule

Perfume - JB22 (1st)

Jenson’s wife founds out about his affair (Part one)

Guilty As Sin? - NR6 (4th)

Is it guilt from fucking a married man or her brothers long-time rival?

Mafia AU, Chap 2 - LS2 (8th)

Gotta start small with the driver and work her way up to bigger informations

My Oh My - KM20 (11th)

A little bit older with a bad reputation

Dinner? - MS7 (15th)

Who would choose food over sex?

Guys My Age - LH44 (18th)

Why have the a boyfriend her own age when older guys can treat her so much better

My Love - JH20 (22nd)

Turns out, cigarette sex is hot

English Love Affair - NR6 (25th)

Is it an affair or Nico searching for comfort?

Are you jealous, liefje? - MV33 (29th)

When Max flirts with Charles, he’s bound to get a little punishment

[starkwlkr]

so where are the james hunt fanfics?? asking for a friend …

[yum-grass]

Oh btw I finished mag200 in a really mentally unstable place (I was vary end coded, suicidal with a fear of dying, growing up, going nowhere in life etc) and so listening to Jonah pleading for his life just to get struck down anyway (mixed with me not being able to pick up on social cues and not realizing that Jonah was a manipulator(and to be honest i still don’t see it re-listening which is worrying for my future lol))) made me feel like really bad for him because like yeah I’d probably do that to (and I might be doing it now I am a vary bad person) if it meant not dyeing and being wholly consumed in safeness

[justtwotired]

Guys I’m free for the coming few days and I am incredibly boreeed, please give me some recs so I can write instead of endlessly scrolling on TikTok

I write for these fandoms:

Harry Potter Golden trio era and marauders era

Narnia

Ninjago

SSO

Lord of the rings/the hobbit

Stranger things

The dragon prince

Wednesday

Sam and Colby / Johnnie Guilbert

Arcane

Willow (Kit Tanthalos and Jade Claymore)

The rookie

Carmen Sandiego

Atla

That was about it, I’ll basically write anything so just lemme know ;)

(No smut tho, not really comfortable with that.)

[spoopiloops]

ever since i read this i can never get out of my mind holyshit. i usually don't read fics with the mention of y/n too coz they tend to make me cringe. but i didn't mind it this time, like the story just flowed so smoothly i didn't even grasped the fact they used y/n😭 all my attention was focused on bucky. i'm entranced frfr

Welcome home... Soldat? | Part I

That time when Bucky accidentally relapsed into the Winter Soldier.

Summary: Y/N had make a habit of greeting Bucky a warm 'welcome home' everytime he came back from his missions, but there was one particular day when she unknowingly greeted someone else.

Navigation: Part I || Part II* || Part III (end)

Words: 2.9k++

Pairing: winter soldier!bucky x female!reader

Warnings: implied 18+ content, implied smut, dubious con on groping reader's body, dark(?) possessive behaviour, google translated russian, our soldat is kinda cute(?) in his own twisted way, and well, basically fluffy times with the soldat.

P/S: Guys, I never planned this at all. I mean, who am I kidding? All of my fics are not planned and I clearly write things out of impulse. Therefore, this one don't have much of a story building/plot because it was born out of one scene that flashed in my head and has been replayed way to many times that I need to let it out. Anyway, I still hope you enjoy it, somehow.

Read my other works here: Masterlist

Y/N didn't know when exactly she started this habit but she swore to herself to never grow out of it.

It's been nearly 2 years since the fall of Hydra and the avenger has accepted the winter soldier under their wing. Begrudgingly by Tony, but the rest of them seemed like they're not against it.

Y/N used to be an agent from SHIELD but since the fall, she had been recruited under the avenger's programme and had been living in the tower since.

She remembered the day when Bucky first came in, he was quiet and weary all the time. Like an abandoned cat, picked up by a stranger to come to their home. And it took the whole team months before he slowly adapted.

Who knew he would morphed into a sassy, grumpy little shit, right?

Since the first day, Y/N had been making an effort to make him feel welcomed. Helped him to adjust to modern times. Though it was not regular but she's glad he came to her from time to time to ask about things.

Y/N only meant it to be casual when she greeted him back from his missions. Usually, it'll be something like,

"Oh you're back?"

"How's the team?"

"Good to see you well put together from such horrendous mission."

"God, you look like you fell from 5 flight of stairs."

"Are you even trying to fight back, Bucky?"

But one time, Bucky came back in the morning around breakfast, she wasn't feeling sassy or clever. So, instead of greeting him with playful remarks, in the glory of her messy bed hair and iron man pyjamas, she greeted him with a sleepy smile, "Welcome home, Bucky."

And that surely made the 6 foot, bulky hunk of a soldier paralysed in his spot. His ocean blues slightly widen, and his cheeks deepen in blush.

For a moment, he wondered if this is how he would feel if he had a wife waiting for him to come back from war back in the 40's. But, then again nothing can be compared to the sight he was seeing as he is now.

And Y/N didn't want to ever lose that memory of him.

Cute and flustered Bucky is a very rare sight to see. Perhaps, this was the only time she could witness it and she want to cherish it for the rest of her life.

Though Bucky never replied to Y/N's greeting, it didn't stop them from starting a whole new routine.

Y/N always knew that she had a thing for the sargent, but about 2 months from that moment, Y/N realized she was in love.

And she waited for him, every single chance she had for arrival of the team to come back. Just like she is now, at 03:45 in the morning, while scavenging for something sweet she can eat as she waits for Bucky's return.

When, she turned around she was not expecting to have her face into clashed into something, "Oww!" Y/N shuts her eyes close as she rubbed her aching nose to ease the sharp strike of pain.

For a moment there, she seriously thought she might have just bumped into some kind of a solid air that appeared out of nowhere, but when she opened her eyes, it was just Bucky who was standing rather ominously still.

"My god, you scared the shit out of me. I know you used to be an assassin but, you gotta announce yourself sometimes, man." She joked. Although she did find it impressive that he managed to silently sneak up on her with those thick, heavy combat boots he was wearing.

"Woah, someone's been having a field day kicking your ass, huh?" Y/N's eyes lingered a little longer on the wounds at the side of his temple that she didn't notice the void in his eyes.

"Anyway..." she continued as she shook of the thoughts of caressing the cut on the corner of Bucky's lip, before greeting him with a gentle smile, "Welcome home."

Bucky's unresponsiveness was nothing new to her. With the amount of silent glares and gruff eye-rolls that he had shot at her these past few months, she's used to it by now.

But, when she finally had the guts to look him in the eye, only then she noticed the underlying shift. Albeit, his signature frown was still as present as ever but, those eyes had made her questioned of the slight difference from what she recognized.

Bucky wordlessly step forward and cornered her until her back meets the side of the kitchen isle. He took his time assessing her, almost admiring the way her iris wavered in confusion.

Something is wrong.

Her guts were screaming at her to notice it but her body wasn't reacting accordingly. That's when the voice of the AI, Jarvis echoed through the walls.

"Emergency alert: Code Winter. Initiated by Captain Steve Rogers. All agent is advised..." The announcement went on based on protocol while the cogs in Y/N's brain finally moved, "Code Winter? That means..."

 "...to be cautious of Sargent James Barnes; reprimand on sight however try not to engage alone. Agents is..." Jarvis voice in the background interwoven with Y/N's internal deduction, "...This is not Bucky?"

As she tried to put her own mind into perspective, trying to make herself believe that this man in front of her is not Bucky Barnes who she had been adoring over for these past few months, the soldat's hands reached the side of her neck, squeezing the softness of her flesh while his thumbs grazed the shape of her jawline.

His heavy gaze remained on hers, willing her to stay as still possible.

"Bucky...?" She called his name in hopes of triggering something, anything for within his controlled mind.

At end of the corridor leading towards the kitchen, Steve could see how the soldat had already gotten his hands on Y/N and panic strike him like lightning, he sprinted towards her as he despretely shouted, "Y/N! Stay away from--"

But Y/N was not able to render anything she heard from Steve, especially after a long silence, the soldat finally spoke, "Yes, I'm home..."

He carefully pulled her face closer to his as his lips planted on her soft cheek, "...мое cолнышко (my sunshine)" he lifted for a second just to kiss her again on her temple as he whispered lowly, "...мое Родная (my darling)"

Y/N's heart was beating madly for several different reasons. Parts of her was terrified that the soldat might break her neck within an instance, but it gradually changes into something much more confusing, a conflicted joy, when he keep on trailing his lips all over her face.

What is happening?

Both her and Steve was practically frozen in pure confusion.

Steve's mouth hanged open as words failed to form, while Y/N was unable to comprehend any sort of thoughts, let alone counter movements; when the soldat continue to whisper Russian endearments against her skin, littering sweet kisses on every part of her face, except for her lips as if he wanted to tease her.

His hands slowly travel down her back and stopped on the side of her waist, pulling her body closer until there was no space in between them anymore, before he wrapped his arms around her.

The drag of his stubble on her skin burned but it felt so good when he kissed it after.

Seconds later, Sam managed to catch up with Steve and his cautious approach fell as he witnessed the soldat's rather domestic actions towards Y/N.

Sam foolishly let his guard down as he approached with a question directed to Steve, "Is the tin man back?" That was when a bullet barely grazed the tip of his ear that then buried through the wall behind him.

Both Steve and Sam forced to stop any sort of movement as the soldat's aim was still locked towards their direction; his cold blue eyes pierced with a menacing warning, all the while posessively holding Y/N in his arms as his kisses trailed the side of her neck.

"Nope, not yet." Sam answered his own question as he waited for Steve's order.

Y/N felt like she have to do something to de-escalate the situation. After a quick deduction, and based on the soldat attitude towards her, she took the risk of believing that he would not do anything to hurt her, so she decided to play along.

Will it work though?

Well, she got to have to try for it work.

She gulped nervously before softly calls for him, "Soldat?" she looked up towards him.

When the soldat gave her his attention, she watched the loose strand of his hair fall down to his face. Her hand went up and reached for it, "How about we go back to your room and let me tend these wounds, hmm?" She cooed while tucking his behind his ear and briefly caressing his cheek with the back of her fingers.

The soldat didn't reply but instead silently process her proposition.

However, the hesitation only worried her more, so she continued to persuade, as she cautiously slide her hand, following his arm that was holding her teammates at gun point, "It'll be just the two of us. How's that sound?" She smiled warmly at him as she managed to lower it enough to grab the gun away from his grasp.

There was a glint of indecipherable emotion in his eyes when she mentioned that, which then he nodded in agreement.

"Okay then, let's go." She put the gun on the kitchen isle behind her and replaced her hand in his, pulling him towards his bedroom. The soldat did not protest to her lead, in fact her followed her obediently.

But before Y/N makes an exit, she looked back towards Steve and mouthed a reassuring message, "I got this."

The captain had all the rights to be weary but at this point, he just had to believe in Y/N's action plan. He nodded and replied, "Be safe. We'll be outside."

Along the walk towards Bucky's room, all she could think was that she can handle it and she got this under control.

But, does she?

Well, Y/N did have it under control, in terms of keeping the soldat from going on a berserk rampage but what she didn't think through was how the fuck she should handle his behaviour towards her.

After they arrived to Bucky's room, she had instructed him to strip off his tactical suit and leave him sitting at the edge of the bed, only in his short to avoid him reaching for any hidden weapons he had, all the while she went to grab the first aid from his bathroom.

Now that she almost done tending the small injuries on his face, it finally dawned to her that the soldat had her immobilized in between his legs as his hands rubbed the back of her thighs, occasionally squeezing the softness of her body in his tender grip.

His intent gaze waited patiently for her to finish and as soon as she did, he pulled her on his lap, making her to straddle on top him as he smushed his face on her chest, "Oh, Родная (darling)... I have missed you."

Her hands found her balance on his shoulders while the soldat roaming hands held her body still by the back of her waist.

It will be a lie if she said her heart didn't skipped when he confessed; even if it was still the soldat's thoughts and words but it was Bucky's voice.

The soldat pulled his other hand to play with the buttons of her pyjamas shirt, specifically around her chest area.

Part of him wanted to just rip her clothes off from her body but another part of him didn't want to. He didn't want scare her; and his precious little darling deserved to be pampered.

He had her buttons popped off; one by one, slow and almost sensual while Y/N was still in a heated debate with herself on what she should to next. She wanted the soldat to stop but god the temptation of wanting more was beyond her will power.

This is not Bucky.

She knew that. But, she had been bewitched by the look in those familiar blue eyes. So enthralled and so keen to unwrap her.

Y/N let out a low yet sharp gasp as her chest was finally revealed, "Soldat, what..." The soldat take a quick glance into her eyes, "...are you doing?" before trailing back down to the curve of her breasts, cupped so beautifully with a simple black bra.

His hands went back to grabbed her thighs as he replied, "Just wanna hold you." He leaned closer and left a lingering kiss in between her breasts, mumbling deep, " Wanna feel you, мое Родная (my darling)"

Fuck, it feels so good.

"Wanna feel you..." Y/N's grip on his bare shoulder tightened as he lips warmed the top of her right breast, "...here." An unexpected moan slipped out of her lips as the soldat latched his wet mouth on her skin, bruising it with his mark.

He groaned to the taste of her, so sweet and soft, he wanted to pull the bra off her and suckle on her nipple. He bet that they're perky and so sensitive. Bet he could make her cum just by playing with them.

He wanted to leave his bite mark around them, make them look much more prettier. But, he needed to be patient.

He brought his left hand up to hold the other side of her chest; pulling another pretty noise as the cold metal of his thumb gently stroked the exposed skin of her breast.

"Wanna feel you..." His flesh hand made its way lower and cupped her clothed sex, unexpectedly making her grind down to his hold, "...here."

She couldn't help to find shelter in the crook of his neck when he began to stroke her sensually.

This is getting out of hand.

Y/N doesn't mind to entertain him if the soldat only asked for him to hold her but it was clear that he wanted so much more than just innocent touches. Especially when he languidly rubbed his middle finger in between the slit of her pussy.

She hates how easy it was for Bucky's touch turned her on, his hands and his lips; regardless if his actions was someone else's.

This is wrong.

This has to stop.

"No... soldat." She whimpered in his ears as his finger drew slow circles on her clit, his mouth latched on her shoulder.

"I can't touch you here?" He murmured softly as he pressed harder. Even with the barrier of the cotton panties, she was so sensitive to his touch; he loves that about her.

"N-no. You can't." She choked back a moan as she replied.

God, what if he doesn't care?

What if he'll get mad and force it on her?

She can't imagine the guilt Bucky had to experience if the soldat take her right now. And all because her stupid little brain cannot comprehend a plan to stop him, all because she let the soldat touch her as freely, as willingly.

Salty tears started to blur her vision when she sniffled them back.

Much to his deperateness, the soldat pulled her away and watched as her tears spilled out, "Oh darling, don't cry." He leaned in and kiss the corners of her eyes, murmuring his words of comfort, "I hate to see you cry, мое cолнышко (my sunshine)." His metal hand slithered to her back and his palm stroked her lovingly.

"Okay, okay. I won't touch your sweet princess part, okay?" He patted her pussy one last time before reaching to swipe her tears away. "I promise." He whispered.

As much as he wanted to fuck her stupid, fill her hole full with his load; however the soldat does hold her very dear to his heart and hates to see her sad.

"Just let me hold you close, darling?" He cooed as he kissed the edge of her lips.

Y/N didn't know why but she trusted his words. Maybe it was because he was so gentle with her, that she was tricked into believing him.

She watched the soldat waited patiently for her response and when she nodded softly, he swiftly lifted her in his arms and lay her down on the bed.

He tucked himself in under the sheets with her and naturally rested his face on her chest. His fleshed arms wrapped securely around her waist and his metal one around her thighs, as he pulled her closer; almost suffocating himself in between her warm breasts.

It was like an instinct for Y/N to encircle her arms around his neck while her hands run through the thick of his hair, absentmindedly playing with the softness of it.

She almost giggle when the soldat let out a deep-throated sound of relieved sighs as she continued to massage his scalp.

As the soldat started to sail deeper into dreamland, Y/N thought that maybe this will be the only and the last time she had the chance to hold Bucky like this and she knew it was wrong to feel grateful to the soldat because had done nothing but terrible, despicable things in the past.

But when she thought about it, none of those sins was his choice to make. He was created to kill and nothing else.

But what if he had something to hold on to?

A hope to look forward to?

A person to protect?

Or a home to go back to?

Would he still be the same monster he had been before?

She have not a slightest clue.

But, what she does know that this soldat who's clinging in her arms, deserves something kind.

And she hoped that she managed to give him a sense of peace for once in his life.

Y/N nuzzled to the side of his tired-looking face and placed a sweet kiss on his temple as she whispered ever-so-softly, "Welcome home, soldat."

Part II >>

Read my other works here: Masterlist

A/N: This is possibly part 1? I'm not sure either. Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments! And reblogs is much appreciated!

[aquaticmercy]

All These Things That I've Done

Summary : In which Bucky leaves behind a loving note every time he goes on a mission. But what happens when you stumble on a letter not meant to be found… yet?

Pairing : Bucky Barnes x Reader (she/her) 

Warnings : cursing, mentions of death

Requested by : myself haha

Word count : 2.7k

Note : This is just angsty fluff with a happy ending, really. It was inspired by a song by the Killers of the same title. Enjoy!

Requests are open!

You woke up in the early hours of dawn, the sunlight filtering softly through the sheer curtains, blanketing warmth over the room. You rolled over, expecting to find Bucky beside you, but your hand touched only a tangle of sheets. 

Shit. What day was it? You glanced toward the calendar on the wall, and your stomach dropped. Of course. He was supposed to leave for some sort of extraction mission today.

You couldn’t deny the worry rising in your throat. You knew deep down, James Buchanan Barnes was one of the most skilled fighters on the planet. Sam always reminded you of that the last time you saw him, as if he knew how much you worried. He’d battled alien armies and come out with only a few scratches. A mission like this? It ought to be a piece of cake. You pushed anxiety back down your stomach.

The room was eerily quiet, almost haunting. You heard a soft thud from the hallway, followed by Bucky’s muttering to himself from the other side of the slightly open bedroom door. “Where did I leave my gloves?”

You smiled at his gruff frustration and shouted out just loud enough for him to hear, “Did you check the dryer?”

There was silence before you heard a cluster of steps, and then his voice echoed back through from the washing room, “Got it!”

His footsteps made their way back to you as Bucky appeared in the doorway, fully suited up in his gear. He was strapping the glove onto his human hand, his vibranium arm reflecting in the morning light. You couldn’t help but admire him, eyeing him from top to bottom, your breath hitching at how effortlessly handsome he looked in his tactical suit.

“Morning, doll,” he said with that half-smile that always made your heart flutter like a million little butterflies simultaneously beating their wings.

You sat up, rubbing your eyes as he walked over. He reached the edge of the bed, sitting down next to you. He leaned down to brush a strand of hair away from your face and pressed a gentle kiss to your lips, making your chest warm with joy. “I didn't mean to wake you up.” He apologised. 

“You didn’t,” you mumbled, still groggy from a dreamless sleep. With a tired smile, you asked, “Did you hide the note yet?”

It was a tradition the two of you had started long ago: before every mission, Bucky would leave you a little note, something for you to find while he was away. A scavenger hunt, if you will, to keep you occupied, to remind you he was always thinking of you. Sometimes the notes were practical—like ‘Don’t forget to drink water while I’m gone.’ Other times, they were a bit longer and heartfelt, and it made you feel closer to him even when he was far—even when you couldn’t feel the warmth of his touch and feel the joy in his kiss.

“Of course,” he replied, chuckling. “First thing I did this morning.”

You reached for his hand, your fingers tracing the edges of his gloved palm, craving the feeling of his bare skin. “Be careful out there, okay?”

He leaned down again, this time pressing a kiss to your forehead. His lips lingered a little longer than usual. “Always am,” he murmured, but you could hear the slight uncertainty in his voice, one that you noticed only because you knew him inside out. You could detect the slightest change of inflection, of intention, in his voice. He’d been like this for the last few missions, and you’d be lying if it hadn’t made you a bit more weary. A bit more on edge.

—

Later that evening, after a long day at work, you found the note.

You had been looking around your shared home, sighing at how empty it felt. How it didn’t feel like home without the love of your life echoing the walls with his laughter, filling the air with his scent. You had missed him so much already.

When you found the note, you had been checking for loose change in your jacket pockets. It was tucked neatly into one of them, and you couldn’t help but smile as you pulled it out, unfolding the familiar handwriting. You always wore this jacket in a specific weather—when the sun was shining and it was windy enough. When you were certain it would not rain. You smiled, knowing Bucky would have had to check the forecast to make sure he put it in the right jacket for you.

The stress of the day melted away in that moment, replaced by a gentle warmth that spread through your chest. His notes always had a way of making everything better.

 This one was short but sweet:

‘Don’t miss me too much. I’ll be home before you know it.’

You smiled, your fingers brushing over the soft texture of paper. Lately, he had been cutting the edges to soften the paper after you told him you got paper cut from one of them.

How had you not noticed it in your pocket all day? Perhaps you had just been distracted. Still, the idea that his words had been with you the whole time made you feel like he’d been by your side, even though he was probably on a different continent by now. You took a deep breath, walking up to your bedroom. You folded it neatly before tucking the note into the small box on your nightstand—the box where you kept all of his letters. By now, there were dozens of small reminders of his love for you.

 You sat on the edge of the bed and opened the box, pulling out a few more letters. You took your time to read through them.

‘Don’t forget to take care of yourself. I know you get so wrapped up in work that you forget. I’ll bring you back something special.’

‘You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. Thank you for being patient with me.’

‘When I get back, can we try the new coffee shop down the street? Don’t go without me.’

You chuckled softly at one of the more recent ones. 

‘I may be a super soldier, but I still can’t fold a fitted sheet for shit. You’ll have to show me again when I get home.’

Oh, what a wonderful boyfriend you had.

 —

Two days later, the ache in your chest had only grown. You missed Bucky so dearly, and you were starting to struggle to keep yourself busy from the overwhelming emotions. 

But your worries weren’t yours alone. In the past few weeks, you have noticed subtle changes in Bucky. He was quieter than usual, his smiles a little less frequent. There were moments when he seemed far away, lost in thoughts he didn’t share. You’d catch him staring out the window or slipping away into the early morning hours, as if trying to outrun something you couldn’t see. You didn’t want to press him, not when it was clear he was trying to handle it on his own. But now, in the silence of the empty house, the signs of his unease gnawed at you. 

Cleaning the apartment helped, at least for a little while. But as you organised his things, you found another note. 

It was not hidden in the usual places, not anywhere you would even think to look, therefore not one he expected you to find. 

You wondered why the note was tucked deep into the back of one of his drawers, behind all his mission files that he’d stay up late to read up on. The edges were rounded, so you knew that this would have been somewhat recent.

There was something different about it. Folded smaller than usual, like it wasn’t meant to be found just yet. Or maybe ever.

 Your heart raced as you unfolded it, curiosity getting the best of you. It was a note, right? If it was meant for you, why did you feel so guilty opening it?

But nothing could have prepared you for the words written inside.

‘If you’re reading this, it means I didn’t make it back.

I’m sorry. I tried to be careful. I always try to come home to you every time. But I knew there’d be a day when I wouldn’t make it. 

Maybe this is for the best. You deserve so much better than what I can give you. You deserve better than someone with blood on his hands. You deserve someone who isn’t always living with one foot in the grave.

Please don’t waste your time mourning me. Move on. Be happy. Go get yourself someone who can give you the life you deserve. Anyone would be lucky to be loved by you.

I love you more than anything in the world.’

Your hands trembled as the letter fell from your fingers, tears already welling up in your eyes. 

The words on the note blurred as your tears fell. You tried to convince yourself that it was just Bucky’s fear talking, not a premonition. But a voice in the back of your mind whispered, What if he’s right? What if one day he doesn't come back?

What if he’s not coming back?

You’d always been confident about Bucky's ability to survive on his missions. Sure, you’d worry about the odd wound or if he’d get a scar that needed constant medical attention, but death was, more often than not, off the cards. Now that you knew he thought of it, that’s all you could think about. 

Bucky had always been so good at hiding this fear. You knew something was off, but you always thought that he was just a bit nervous, that’s all. 

But here, it was laid bare in his own handwriting. 

It broke your heart that he had already resigned himself to the idea that one day he wouldn’t come home. That his death was inevitable. And worse, that he believed it would be better off that way. 

—

The days dragged on painfully long after you found the note. Every time your phone buzzed, your heart raced uncontrollably. You were expecting news—good or bad—but it was always something else. Work. Or people checking up on you. 

So you used them as a distraction. You threw yourself to work, met with friends, and did anything to stop your worries, but nothing worked. 

Each night, the bed felt colder and lonelier, the house quieter than you would have preferred. Anxiety has already started eating you up and swallowing you whole.

To your relief, Bucky returned a few days later, safe but exhausted. You heard the door click open, and before he could say anything, you rushed to his side, wrapping your arms around him, pressing your face into his chest, taking in his scent. As he shut the door and dropped his bag, your fingers fluttered on his back, making sure he was real. Then you sunk your palm into him as if he might slip away, as if his life depended on it.

He held you tight, rubbing slow circles on your back, his voice soft in your ear, taken aback by your reaction. You usually cracked a joke or two, or excitedly kissed him on his arrival. “Hey, I’m here. I’m okay.”

Your body was tense—almost skeletal—against his. After a moment, he pulled back slightly, his brows furrowed. “What’s wrong?”

You hesitated, your heart pounding, then quietly said, “I found it. The note.”

His face froze. He knew which one, but he had to ask. “Which one?”

“The one I shouldn’t be reading,” you paused hesitantly, “…yet.”

 Bucky’s expression fell into oblivion, looking pale and empty. He looked away. “I didn’t want you to find that,” he murmured.

Tears stung your eyes as you gripped his jacket tighter. “How long have you been carrying this stupid fucking idea that every mission is your last?”

He sighed heavily, running a hand through his hair, struggling to find the right words to communicate how he felt. “A couple of months. It’s just how I think now,” he admitted, his voice heavy, raspy. “Every mission feels like it could be the one. And if it is... ” He trailed off, his emotions hanging in the air like a death sentence waiting to be dealt. “Maybe it’s better that way. You deserve someone who can give you a normal life.”

You reached for his hand, stifling quiet sobs, squeezing it tight. “How could you possibly say that? Do you have any idea what it feels like to know you’ve already accepted that you might not come back?”

“There've been a couple of close calls,” he admitted with a heavy heart, and this was the first time you’ve heard of this. You could tell he was just blurting out words, trying to string together an explanation as best he could. “What I’m saying is, If I were out of the picture, you wouldn’t have to worry about these things.”

You sighed, trying to steady your voice but not succeeding. “I don’t want that. I want you, James.” His first name sounded gentle in your tongue. It sounded like a longing, like a cry.

His gaze dropped to the floor, tears brimming in his eyes. “You deserve better.”

He whispered it again, your name escaping his lips like a prayer. Your heart ached. This man, who had fought battles no one could imagine, who had survived horrors and rebuilt himself piece by piece, still didn’t believe he was worth loving.

You took a steadying breath and shook your head, cupping his face gently. “You don’t get to decide what’s better,” you whispered firmly. “Do not tell me what I do or don’t deserve.”

His hands slipped from your waist, almost helpless. You were not letting him lock himself out again, not when you had the chance to pull him out for good.

“Look at me,” you said, a little sharper now, forcing him to meet your gaze, looking into his stormy eyes that once looked as blue as clear skies. “You’ve spent years carrying the weight of everything you’ve done. You’re not that man anymore, Bucky. Deep down, you must know that too.”

He shook his head, his voice hoarse. “I’m always going to be that man. I can’t just erase that.” 

“No,” you agreed, and your hand slipped down to rest against his chest, right over his heart. “But you’re also this man—the man who leaves me little notes before every mission. The man who gets frustrated when he can’t find his gloves. The man who cannot fold a fitted sheet to save his life.” You let a chuckle escape your tight chest, and it coaxed a little, hopeful smile from him, too.

“And I love all of you,” you continued. “The parts you think are broken—I love them all. So stop trying to push me away like you’re some kind of lost cause, because you’re not.”

You pressed a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth, your lips lingering there before pulling back just enough to meet his eyes again. “Talk to me. Let me help. You don’t have to carry this alone, Bucky. But this note—this can’t be the way I find out about these things.” 

His lips quivered, and you could feel the cracks in his fortress gate starting to open. 

His arms wrapped around you in a desperate embrace.

After what felt like silent eternity, Bucky finally spoke, his voice rough with traces of a fragile kind of hope. “I don’t know if I can believe it all right now. But,” he gulped down a sob, “I’ll try. For you.”

“No,” you insisted, an encouraging smile on your lips that made his heart stutter, “for yourself.”

He nodded weakly, and that was enough. 

For a moment, you stayed like that, wrapped in each other’s arms, the world outside could be burning down, and you wouldn’t care as long as he was safe.

Eventually, Bucky loosened his grip just enough to look down at you, his fingers brushing softly against your cheek. “You sure you want to put up with all this?” He just had to ask. “No take-backs.”

You laughed softly—a cathartic release, the sound filling the quiet room. You nodded, “I’m not going anywhere. You’re stuck with me.”

For now, it didn’t matter that he didn’t truly think he was worthy of love yet.

For now, you could believe for the both of you.

And one day, maybe he’d believe it too.

-end

[hereticpriest]

Life and Death

Relationship: Niki Lauda x Reader, Niki Lauda x Reader x James Hunt

Warnings: Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, Pregnancy, Nurburgring Crash, Injury Recovery, Idiots in Love, Postpartum Depression, Motherhood, The Pressure of Motherhood, Motherhood Magazines Should Be Burnt, Misogyny, Near Death Experiences, James Hunt is the Perfect Birth Partner, Comfort Sex, Supportive James Hunt, Blow Jobs, Hand Jobs, Mild petplay, Puppy James Hunt, Dry Humping, Light Dom/sub, Dominant Reader, Threesome - F/M/M, Open Relationships/Complicated Relationship Dynamics, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Self-Doubt, Body image issues, Creampies

They keep looking at you.

Niki's team, the ones with the radios, keep looking at you as if they expect you to fall apart as you step back into the main part of the garage while rubbing your massive belly. Which means something is wrong. Something is terribly wrong, and you are a liability - or, your condition is - which means something is wrong with Niki. You'd just been in the bathroom for the 600th time you needed to pee today - the joys of pregnancy, especially carrying an active Lauda baby that liked to stomp on your bladder. You can hear the dramatic rambling of the radio announcer as you step further out, your lips pursing as he mentions a crash. Fear grips your heart, and you swear it stops dead in your chest. You feel cold.

"What is it?"

"We don't know if he was in it." One of the mechanics replies, attempting to sound soothing. Your heart drops. You cup your massive belly from below, stroking your hands over the broad expanse of it reassuringly, as if telling your baby that everything will be okay. As if they can hear everything, and might be scared for their father as well.

"But you think he was.” You whisper, wide-eyed and unsure. Almost as if you are the harbinger of your own end, your own fucking banshee telling you of your coming death, you suddenly hear the announcer. The information comes in pieces.

Niki was in a crash. His car is on fire. Two more cars have hit him, and they can't get through the flames to retrieve him. He is on fire, and they cannot get him out of the car. Niki is dying, and no one can save him.

One of the managers moves quickly to grab you as you feel your world spin, and you cling to his arms to try and stay upright. Luca, you think. He murmurs something to you in Italian, or perhaps it's English but your mind is too far gone to hear him.

"They have to get him."

Tears fill your eyes, and you blink them away, angry with your own weakness. Your husband is dying and here you are, crying like you're the one in pain.

"They will. Mrs. Lauda, come on, you need to sit down."

"I don't need to sit down, I need my husband!"

You don't lose consciousness, but a part of you wishes you had. They take Niki to the hospital and you lie about your condition to avoid being placed in a room instead of with him. Even if ‘with him’ means the waiting room down the hallway from his room. You spend hours - countless hours - in a daze as you stare down Niki's hallway while they endeavour to save him. Clay arrives with a bag of your things, and a cushion for you to make the uncomfortable hospital chairs less unbearable. Tony arrives with food shortly after, and you let him bully you into checking your blood pressure, which is unsurprisingly high. You tell the nurse in no uncertain terms that if you're being treated for the obvious results of a traumatic incident and are thus unable to see your husband the second he's stable, you will use your God-given, pregnancy-ordained leeway to have a colossal hissy fit and ruin their week.

No one protests. Well, one of the doctors protests, however the nurses bully him into leaving you alone. They're well aware that putting you in a room will only worsen your condition. As a compromise, you let them check your blood pressure every hour, you eat at scheduled intervals, and you drink a near constant stream of glasses of water. Which means you pee more than you sit solemnly to wait. Hours more pass before the priest arrives at the hospital's behest, and you scowl at him despite the seemingly sincere condolences he offers you.

"He's not dead." You remind the pastor, and he gives a gentle apology that makes your blood boil, "He'll kick you out if you start giving him rites. He needs encouragement, not to be given up on."

Despite your warning, the priest comes bumbling out of the room a few minutes later, and you hear your husband's voice, raspy and weak from the fire and smoke. It gives you a moment of relief - a brief respite that you're not crazy to think that Niki is going to survive this. That you won't be widowed so quickly after your wedding. That you won't have to learn to live without him. It seems impossible now that you've had him - like you were living a half life until you found the missing piece of you. Willi Dungl, Niki's masseuse and friend, arrives as the next in the rotating wheel of Niki's friends and 'coworkers' that seem to have been volun-told to take care of you while he recovers. He brings food and a small blanket, corrects your posture, and when you tell him that you're too pregnant for good posture, he spends a good five minutes holding your belly up to give your back a break. It's an impressive feat - you're almost eight months along, and it shows.

They let you see Niki what feels like hours later, long after Willi has left, and visitors have been limited for the night. Long after letting you know that by some miracle, Niki has stabilised. You'd nearly broken down the door to his room right there and then. Your blood pressure finally goes down enough for the nurses to give you a bit of breathing room, though you heard them tittering about the likelihood you would need an emergency c-section when you passed them by for one of your thousand pee breaks. The only reason you didn’t step in and give them shit is because you could hear the concern in their voices. They weren’t gossiping - they were planning ahead and making sure everyone was informed as to your condition.

It doesn���t stop you from wanting to crack their heads together.

As you walk into Niki’s room, you steel yourself, knowing what awaits you beyond the door, even if you don’t know the extent of it. Niki lays on his bed, his skin raw and red and weeping under once-white bandages. You sit beside him in the chair set beside his bed, lean your side against the bed, and settle in for the long run.

“I love you, Niki Lauda. So does our baby.”

He’s in a coma, but you hope somewhere, deep down, he might be able to hear you.

~

No one ever talks about how difficult recovery is. How painstaking. How long it takes to feel a little bit more like yourself. Rarely does anyone discuss what bearing witness to someone's recovery feels like. How soul-crushing it can be to watch the person you love most suffer and endure. There isn't a guide for preparing to grieve your new husband, or how best to support his recovery while nearly eight months pregnant. No one warned you about how difficult it would be to not be able to help - to be physically incapable of helping - after a life of complete independence.

You spend your days at Niki's bedside - your OBGYN appointments are moved to the hospital where he is being cared for, and you like your new doctor well enough. She is very no nonsense, but she doesn't harp on you for neglecting yourself in the wake of your husband's condition. Instead, she finds solutions. She gives a list of dietary requirements to Tony, who takes care of your meals despite your insistence that you can manage on the hospital's food. He tells you later that many of the driver wives have been helping by making meals for him to bring. Gem that he is who knows you far too well after so long, he even brings a stack of thank you cards with their names and addresses so that you can write cards for everyone. You've always been fond of cards and letters, and it gives you something to do.

Your doctor requires tests of your blood pressure - twice daily rather than hourly like the nurses had originally been doing - and gives you a list of stretches that you have to do at least three times a day. The only thing you disagree with - the only thing you're truly upset about - is that she makes you stay out of Niki's room whenever he's being treated. When they first started changing his bandages after he awoke, they would let you sit at his bedside to offer whatever support you could. They didn't let you stay in the room for any major treatments, of course, but the little things. Your doctor felt that being in the room was far too upsetting, and the benefit to Niki was negligible in comparison to the harm it would do to you.

You don't tell her that sitting in the hallway and listening to him scream is no better. The unknown is just as terrible as the image of the raw wounds in your mind's eye whenever you lay your head on your pillow to sleep for the night. Living in a hotel for six weeks as a pregnant woman isn't ideal, but you refuse to leave your husband's side for longer than a night.

~

You married an idiot.

Six weeks after his crash at Nurburgring, Niki Lauda returns to Formula One racing at the Italian Grand Prix, against all odds and against all medical advice. You follow him to Italy, also against medical advice, because you're also an idiot. Thankfully, Niki's idiocy precludes him from being able to fight you on your own idiocy. Worst case scenario, you remind him, you'll give birth in Italy. There are worse things. In the end, he concedes so long as he has a flight on standby to take you home the moment the race is done.

There's a conference in Monza first, and Niki tries his damndest to get you not to attend, but you tell him to fuck off while rubbing cocoa butter into your expansive belly. You offer him a gentle smile afterwards to soothe the damage your snippy tone may have done, reaching out to touch one of the uninjured places on his arm. He takes a breath, adjusting the hat he's insisting on wearing as armour, and you pout at him.

"I love you, honey." You murmur, then again, "Ich liebe dich."

"Ich liebe dich auch."

Standing in the back with James Hunt, who you've only just begun to forgive for baiting Niki into racing in Germany, makes you begin to regret your decision. You can see Niki's nerves even if no one else can, and the reporters are like sharks.

“And what did your wife say when she saw your face?” The journalist asks, and you take a single step before James grabs your arm to stop you in your tracks.

“She said, 'Sweetie, you don't need a face to drive. You just need a right foot.'” Niki replies, earning laughter from the other reporters, but a scowl from the bastard one. You’d actually told him that he would be beautiful to you no matter what happened, that you still wanted him even injured (which earned you a croaky, dirty laugh) and that so long as he loved you, you would never stop loving him either. That was, however, far too personal for Niki to confess to this fuckwit.

"I'm being serious. Do you really think your marriage can survive with the way you look now? Do you think your baby will be scared of you?" The asshole asks with a callous sneer. You break James' grip, weightily shoving a chair out of your way as you begin to walk towards the reporter, but James grabs you just above the belly.

"Wait, wait, darling, you can't-"

“I’m being serious too.” You distantly hear Niki say, but you’re so distracted by trying to get James’ hands off of you that you barely pay attention.

"Like hell I can't!" You shout, and the scuffle draws attention while Niki stares at you in mixed horror and adoration, "Hey, why are you asking Niki questions that should be meant for me, huh? Come ask me to my face how I feel about my husband, you shitstain fucking coward!"

Niki cuts the conference as you're mid-rant, getting up and making his way towards the door where James is doing his best to drag you without compressing your tummy. You're not making it easy on him, but the moment you notice Niki going in the same direction, you stop fighting the Brit.

"You make him pay, James, you understand me? Then we'll be even." You mutter under your breath, and James nods darkly in your periphery, his normally smiling mouth twisted into a frown. The moment Niki is within reach, you stop him before leaving the room and kiss him as softly as you can.

"Darling, they're taking photos." James whispers, and while Niki stiffens, you are not put off in the slightest. So long as you're not hurting Niki - or at least, hurting him more than he's happy to endure to kiss you - you have nothing to be ashamed of.

"Let them." You murmur, breaking the kiss and giving Niki an adoring little smile while James breaks away from you both, "I love you, Niki Lauda."

"I love you, Mouse."

When the news reaches your ears that the reporter in question disappeared shortly after the conference and was last seen with a bloody mouth and possible missing teeth, you let go of the remaining anger in your heart towards James. Well, almost all of it. Enough to begin healing.

You've never been very good at letting go.

~

Watching Niki get into the car is almost as painful as the first time you watched him try and put on his helmet after the accident, but you let him go with every ounce of strength in your body. Tony tries to make you sit, but you refuse, so he instead stands beside you with his hand on your upper back just in case. Niki's start is shaky at best, which doesn't surprise you at all - you know he's scared despite how he tried to hide it. Luca pauses in his own celebration to squeeze your arm reassuringly as Niki gets back into his stride, and you nod to him, listening to the announcer narrate the race with bated breath.

Despite his rocky start, Niki Lauda places fourth in a stunning recovery that seems to completely overshadow the victors. He deserves this, you remind yourself. He deserves to be praised for his strength and resilience, even if it hurts you to watch him race again. You smile as he's celebrated by the mechanics and his peers, nearby reporters going nuts in their attempts to take a good photograph. Tony is the only one who sees you wiping tears from your eyes, your hand cupping your belly protectively.

The flight from Italy is long, and admittedly brutal even though you leave immediately after the race. Part of that is because you're fairly sure you're approaching labour, though you say nothing to anyone until the plane has landed and you're heading towards your car. 

"Niki, my love?"

"Yes?" He asks skeptically at your odd tone, and you pause as you feel dripping down your leg. He stops with you, putting a hand on your belly, "Are you okay?"

"My water broke, honey."

Niki takes a breath, stunned, then presses his hand to the centre of your back and ushers you towards his car, "I'll drive."

Yeah, you bloody well hope so. If your racecar driver husband wasn't driving you to the hospital, you'd throw a fit. Like hell you’re waiting for an ambulance.

~

Wilhelm Lauda is born in the wee hours of the morning after 12 hours of labour. Tony and his wife Liliana, the latter of whom was meant to be your support during the birth, arrive an hour late. In their stead, the most shocking person is able to make it in time to hold your hand - James Hunt, on a two and a half hour direct flight from London, is able to make it early into your labour to replace the struggling Niki. Watching you go through such immense pain was not something he ever wanted to do, and he admitted to a certain empathy now after watching you in early labour.

Your birth plan had never included your husband holding your hand through the birth - he was traditional and wanted to wait in the hall to avoid getting in anyone's way - but that had only gotten more important since his accident. He was in too much pain to have his hand squeezed off by you, and getting even the smallest bump would likely cause him quite a bit of pain. Even after James arrived, he stayed with you through the early labour to comfort you while you made your best attempt at breaking James' hand, until, of course, it was determined that you were in active labour. Niki left before the epidural, and you focused on James' blanched face through it to distract yourself from the pain.

James was a good birth partner, you had to admit. He held your hand even when you were screaming, wiped your face with a cool wet rag when you got sweaty, and played along swimmingly when you began cursing out your husband loud enough that there was no chance he couldn't hear you outside. One of the nurses gave him a funny look when he kissed your temple, as she had already asked about him once or twice, wondering if perhaps he was a family member. She was smart enough not to push, however, considering the long list of threats you'd already made at Niki for putting you through this.

At the end of it all, Wilhelm came into the world screaming with you, wailing as he was cleaned off and the cord was cut, but quieted the moment he was placed on your heaving chest. James left you to get Niki, and you blinked blearily as your husband pressed a kiss to your sweaty forehead, then cupped your cheeks and kissed your eyelids, before finally pressing his lips to yours.

"It's a boy." The nurse informs you both, and you sigh happily as you run delicate fingers over the top of his head. The babe nestles into your chest, and you let him rest there for a moment before carefully picking him up and laying him on his back in your arms so Niki can see him properly.

"What are we calling him?" You ask your husband as he pulls a chair close to the bed so he can see.

"Wilhelm. Wilhelm James." Niki replies, and James chokes on a sob, his hand pressed to his mouth in your periphery.

"A good name. Wilhelm James Lauda." You agree. The nurse steps in once you've both had a moment, taking your son to check him out while Niki sits on one side of your bed and James takes the other. James lets you sip on some water, then refreshes the cloth he'd been wiping your face with and wipes your face and neck down properly. Niki, meanwhile, holds your hand gently and tells you how proud he is of you in whispered German.

Soon enough, Wilhelm is brought back to you, and his mewling encourages the nurse to help you pull your gown down in the front to try breastfeeding for the first time. He latches quickly, and Niki smiles as he watches his son with all the love in the world. Only an idiot could ever look at him and think him cold. The nurse gives James a weird look when she realises that he’s watching you breastfeed, your other breast hanging out of your gown, and your husband gently stroking your shoulder and arm delicately. You’re sure she only doesn’t say anything because neither yourself nor Niki seem bothered.

"Hungry boy." James comments, "he'll be a little hamster like his father, constantly snacking, with chubby little cheeks."

~

Tony and Liliana arrive shortly after, and James departs to let them come in, kissing you on the forehead goodbye. He promises to visit soon to help out with the little one, sidehugs Niki gently, then heads off. You have no doubt he'll spend a night with one of the nurses before heading home. Niki helps you cover up before Tony and Liliana come in, and you can't help but smile as Liliana gives Niki's hand a gentle squeeze. It's her first time seeing him since the accident, but she doesn't stare, too kindhearted and far too preoccupied with the baby.

You're discharged in the morning after both yourself and Wilhelm pass all of your health checks, and Tony and Liliana meet you at your home in Salzburg with food and a helpful attitude. Tony brings in their baby shower gift, a rocking chair which he puts in Wilhelm's room. Then, he makes his way to your bedroom, changing the bedsheets for you since you haven't been home in a few days. He throws a load of laundry on, then sets about finding things to clean or move for you guys while Liliana forces a meal on you and Niki, then tidies the kitchen.

Not once do Tony and Liliana ask you what needs to be done - they assess the house together, then set about doing things themselves, only asking for permission if they have to touch anything personal. It takes a huge weight off of your shoulders not to have to think about anything to do with housework. Willie arrives to help Niki, which takes one more worry off of your plate, and you get to simply focus on your son. You're thrilled to find that - at least for now, as you're aware colours change - your son has inherited his father's beautiful blue eyes. He sleeps easily when you hold him against your chest, and he eats without much fuss, but finding the right way to get him to burp takes a bit of work. He fusses whenever you try to change his diaper, but you learn quickly that it's simply because he's taken after his father in another way - the babe hates to be cold for even a moment.

Tony and Liliana leave after a week, and are swiftly replaced by your parents, who take control of Wilhelm immediately and give you a chance to spend some time with Niki. Willie teaches you the exercises he's putting Niki through, and recommends a couple for you to use to rebuild strength after giving birth, though he warns you to take it very easy until you've healed. Willie cried when told the baby's name, and Niki seems very proud of getting that reaction out of the older man, boasting about it gently to you while you rub medicated cream into his skin for him. Thankfully, Niki's grafts have been healing well despite his insistence on racing so shortly after his accident. The donor site on his thigh has healed pretty well, but is still very sensitive, so you're careful even when you apply the moisturizing skin cream he was instructed to use.

Niki's brother Florian visits before your parents leave, and you all have dinner together, only interrupted once by a fussy Wilhelm who needs to be fed. Niki follows you up the stairs, slipping his arms around you while you feed your son, resting his head on your shoulder as much as he can while he rocks with you. Afterwards, he takes Wilhelm from you and burps him while you clean up and set out a change for him for after dinner. You manage to make it through dinner without the baby fussing again, but you're quick to take him upstairs to change him the moment he starts up again. Your mom is kind enough to tidy up for you, while Niki entertains your father and his brother.

Finally, after two and a half weeks of constant company, you're left alone. It's more difficult, certainly, having to maintain the house while caring for your newborn, but at first, the peace of isolation is a relief. Niki does his best to help out where he can, though it often seems that his best way of helping is laying shirtless on the couch with Wilhelm on his chest, keeping your infant occupied with a nap in the sun. Willie visits frequently enough that you teasingly tell him he should move in, and you often find him holding your son while Niki does his stretches, the look on his face soft enough to melt your heart.

Just under a week and half later, Niki flies to Japan with Willie and his team. As would be expected, you're unable to join him with a newborn to care for, and it breaks your heart. You spend the day before he leaves clingier than you've ever been with Niki, as if you need to soak up every moment with him in case it might be your last. Niki does his best to reassure you that everything will be fine without promising anything that he can't, but after his accident, his reassurances fall flat. He does his best, though, rubbing your back as you curl up in his arms for an afternoon nap, pressing kisses to your hair. He leaves on Friday morning with a tearful kiss from you and a snuggle from Wilhelm, promising you that he'll do his best to be safe. He gives you no false platitudes, even now, when you might've been soothed by a lie.

You watch the coverage of the race on television while snuggling with your son, Liliana bustling around your kitchen to ensure you eat something today. Her presence is a balm, but you can feel her gaze on you, and you know she's worried. She, too, does not lie to you. Instead, she gives you half of one of her Valium and a glass of water, then sits at your side to hold your son and rub your back. The rain in Japan has you panicking despite your best efforts, and the Valium helps to soothe your raw and aching nerves. You'll have to get a script from your doctor for the next time Niki gets in one of those death machines - because he will, no matter how much it makes you worry. You'd never ask him to stop. It would be like asking him to give up a part of himself, and you will never be a wife who does that, no matter how much you worry about him. You can swallow your own worries, chased with a little pill or a glass of wine (or six).

In the end, Niki defies all expectations as he is wont to do. He quits on lap 2 of the Japanese Grand Prix, to the great fury of Ferrari. James takes the championship by a single point, and Niki phones you to let you know he's going to attend James' championship celebration, as if he didn't just lose. You're, unfortunately, relatively sedated by this point, and Liliana has to take the phone from you to let Niki know that you're just exhausted. Whether you tell him about the Valium is your choice, not hers, so she doesn't mention it. She promises to take care of the baby, and to let you know that he'll be home soon.

Niki flies himself home, because of course he does. As he steps into your home in Salzburg, he finds you curled up in a chair in the baby's room, both of you fast asleep, while Liliana cleans up the remnants of lunch. He wakes you with a kiss to your temple, and you smile sleepily at him, leaning up to catch his lips with yours. There's nothing but love in your eyes as you look at him, even in the vulnerability of waking up, and Niki isn't quite sure how he got so lucky. He’d worried you would look at him differently, but there isn’t even a hint. You love him. You truly, deeply love him.

"I'm glad you're home." You whisper against his lips, and he smiles.

"I'm glad to be home, Mouse."

~

Willie rubs oil between his hands, warming it up before he begins to rub Niki’s back in slow but firm movements. You watch through the open door, gently rocking your son in your arms as Willie soothes your husband’s pain as much as he can. Thank god for the stern Austrian man, for he withstood Niki’s grumpier moments with ease, gave as good as he got, and found interesting ways to get Niki to do as he was told. You helped where you could - you cooked off of Willie’s strict diet plan and only rarely went off of it to make Niki his favourite schnitzel, you helped him with his stretches and exercises every day, and freely tattled on your husband when he didn’t do all of them. You cared for your son, and only rarely asked Niki for his help, though he was always eager to do the fun things with your baby boy - napping and snuggling being his usual baby duties. You kept the house clean since Niki couldn’t do too much with his healing bones and burnt lungs, on top of his still-healing skin grafts.

“Mouse.” Niki murmurs, and you blink, startled out of your thoughts. You’re still in the doorway, but you’ve stopped rocking, and the baby is stirring in your arms.

“Yes, love?” You ask, resuming your rocking, and he pats the table gently to call you over. You crouch beside the massage table, and Niki presses a kiss to Wilhelm’s fuzzy little head, breathing in the scent of your baby. He takes your hand, and you kiss his knuckles, then lean in to press the softest kiss to his lips while holding Wilhelm’s head to avoid him wiggling and smacking it. You whisper that you love him, then kiss below his grafts to avoid irritating anything, and he sighs as he processes the dual sensation of Willie’s firm hands on his back, and his wife’s gentle touch. Niki smiles at you, and your heart melts, the burdens weighing down your shoulders temporarily lifted by his love.

“I’ll leave you two alone. I’ve got to get ready to feed the baby before he gets fussy.” You hum as Wilhelm begins to stir again, and Willie scoffs.

“Strong boy doesn’t get fussy. His papa gets fussy. Wilhelm is simply hungry for he is growing.”

You laugh, smudging your thumb across the tip of Niki’s nose teasingly, offering Willie a friendly wink, then carrying your son down to the living room to get settled on the sofa while you feed him. You rub your belly, still pretty round even almost a month after giving birth, and flip through a motherhood magazine to make yourself feel bad about not having magically lost the baby weight yet. Guilt has been a place you’ve lived for the last couple of months while doing the best you could and finding it not quite enough. Advice from other women who’ve raised a baby before you has done nothing but make you feel worse, and yet you keep seeking it out. Maybe this magazine will have the miracle cure that will make it all make sense. Maybe this magazine will give you the piece of advice you’re missing that will make you feel less like you can’t measure up to the women who came before you. You were fine when Liliana was here - with her help, you were almost able to manage the baby, keep the house clean, care for Niki, and maintain your appearance to the degree you had before your pregnancy. Now, you were struggling to balance multiple plates, and wishing you were an octopus.

Wilhelm smacks his chubby hand against the side of your breast with a nipple-smothered cry, and you roll your eyes, giving him your finger to hold like he likes to when he’s breastfeeding.

“Yeah, yeah, I know. Bad mommy. Sorry, little man.”

Later that evening, after putting the baby to bed and cleaning up what you couldn’t during the day, you snuggle up with your husband, curling around him from behind while he sighs blissfully under the gentle stroking of your hand on his stomach. Just as you’re beginning to drift in that hazy, comfortable place between sleep and wake, Niki shifts against you with a shiver. Instinctively, you press a couple of kisses to his shoulder, sliding your hand from under his shirt into his boxers to find him hard and leaking. You still can’t have sex, according to your doctor, so you carefully roll Niki onto his back and crawl down between his legs.

“You don’t have to, mausi.” Niki whispers, but his cock throbs as you tap it against your tongue.

“Let me make you feel good, Niki.” You murmur back to him, then pop the head past your lips while he groans deeply in response. His fingers tangle in your hair, and you take your time warming him up, looking up at him through your lashes because you know he needs to see it. You know that he needs to know how much you want him, burns or not, and this is the best way for you to show him while you’re still recovering from childbirth. You take your time making him come, and you swallow it down without a second thought, then snuggle up against him again with a lazy yawn. You’re exhausted. You’ve never before been so bone-deep tired.

“Goodnight, love.” You whisper, already drifting.

“Goodnight, mausi.”

~

James arrives three weeks later to a spotless house, a home cooked meal, a freshly changed and swaddled baby curled up to nap on Niki’s chest, and the fresh, wafting scent of body wash from upstairs. Niki greets him with a hug, though James is quick to take the baby from him, cradling him delicately in his arms. Niki smiles at the sight of James with his son, watching the way the tall blond man strokes his fingertips delicately across the baby's chubby cheeks and thumbs his little chin as if he's made of glass. It's easy to see that he's already smitten. Niki slips an arm around James' waist, and his friend leans into him a little bit, but doesn't put any real weight on him.

"Is she upstairs?" James asks while gazing at the baby, and Niki nods, his lips pulling into a frown before smoothing out, "What is it?"

"She ran around the house like mad all day, cleaning and cooking. She ran upstairs for a shower before you arrived, claiming she has to look nice if we're having company." Niki replies, and James scoffs.

"I barely count as company - I'm more of a lapdog, really. She didn't have to do all of this."

"This is what I told her. She has been..." Niki trails off, then sighs, stroking his fingertip over Wilhelm's little nose, then steering James towards the dining room to eat, "You will see."

James hands Niki a couple of papers that were rolled up in his back pocket, watching as the other man unfolds them and looks them over. Clear STD tests. He folds them and tucks them into James’ back pocket again, a bit of a grin on his face. Niki had discussed having sex again with James when they spoke on the phone, and seeing that all three of you were interested, James got a test. It was the responsible thing to do, and it would allow for a better experience since you were back on birth control.

“Then, I suppose it is a good thing that I did not buy condoms.” Niki murmurs, and James snorts, nudging him gently while he puts Wilhelm into his highchair.

“I would not have appreciated the late night run to the store.”

You join them a few minutes later, and James instantly knows why Niki is so worried. You look stunning, as always, but you have dark circles under your eyes, and your smile is strained. You're wearing a dress that suits your frame, and your hair is done up nicely to accentuate your face. He's never seen you put this much effort into your appearance - he's used to you wearing Niki's shirts and jeans, or simple but pretty dresses. You look lovely, certainly, but there's a certain lack of surety in your eyes that he's never seen before.

"Hello darling." James murmurs, handing the baby to Niki so that he can stand and wrap his arms around you, "You didn't need to do all this, love, it's only me."

"It was no trouble, James." You insist, and he presses a kiss to your cheek, then pulls you up in a big squeeze.

"I'm here to help, darling, put me to work all you like. Come sit and have dinner, take a load off." He insists, pulling out your chair, and you melt a little under the gentle affection. Niki notices, but he's not jealous of James. He knows where your love and lust lies, and the care you've given him since his accident has eased much of his initial worries. Instead, he realises how little time he's had with you since Liliana left. He spends plenty of time with Wilhelm, cuddling while you bustle around and do the things you can't do with a baby in your arms. But his wife? He only spends his nights with you, frequently interrupted by the baby for feedings.

When is the last time he kissed his wife beyond a peck on the cheek?

"I don't know if I'll be able to get through a whole meal. Wilhelm is probably going to get hungry soon. But I'll eat what I can, and come back after he's done." You say before taking a bite of food, and James raises an eyebrow.

"I'll feed him while you eat, it's no trouble. I'll get some cuddle time." James replies, and you hesitate.

"Oh, I haven't been pumping."

"... God, that must be exhausting, darling. Why not? My sister-in-law swears by it, says it makes it so much easier to do things while my brother feeds the tykes."

You hesitate, drumming your fingers anxiously against the table, then shrug, "I... well, a lot of the mommy magazines I've been reading say it isn't good for babies not to be fed naturally."

James and Niki scoff in unison, but soften when they notice your clear distress.

"They say that to make you feel bad, lovey, not to help you. Plenty of mums formula feed their tykes and they end up fine. I reckon the writers of those magazines use them themselves while telling other mums not to." James insists, and you soften a little as he strokes his hand over yours, then squeezes your fingers.

"I would like the chance to feed Wilhelm." Niki comments, and you soften even further, even cracking a smile as your husband rubs his foot against your calf under the table soothingly, "We have a pump - Regazonni's wife sent it as a gift."

"I... well, I could try. I do produce a lot of milk... it would be nice not to have to constantly drop everything every two to three hours." You admit, and Niki nods.

"I will get it out of the baby closet and we will try it." He states firmly, and you nod your agreement, digging into your meal with a bit more gusto now that you feel a little bit better about your circumstances. Your husband compliments the meal first, thankful as always that you’ve made him something delicious, but even more so because he knows that this schnitzel breaches Willie’s diet. James gives you a gentle nudge as he swallows a mouthful, letting you know exactly how delicious this meal is and how nice it is to have someone cook for him. You’re sure it’s a little pathetic how quickly your heart races to get a little bit of appreciation, but you can’t help yourself. Niki always appreciates everything you do for him, but even he will admit he sometimes forgets to say - he’d warned you when you married him, so it did not come as a surprise.

You knew how he felt for you. You knew that he loved and appreciated you.

You knew. And yet…

~

“Get your pre-pregnancy body back? You gave birth to a human being. How could this be possible? What is this scheiße?” Niki asks, and James scoffs, rolls his eyes and rips the page out of the magazine.

“Listen to this garbage - How to keep your husband happy. The first suggestion is to wear a fancy dress, put makeup on, do your hair up, and greet your husband at the door when he gets home from work. Suggestion two, give your husband a massage or rub his feet after a long day at work. Bloody hell. Suggestion three is to tell your husband to go golfing or for a drink with his buddies and not to complain about him not spending time at home. And then it scolds women for daring to miss their husbands while they’re at work all day, tells them off for being selfish for wanting their husbands to do chores or help with the kids after a long day of work, and reminds women that men provide their lives for them. Is this from the forties? You can’t tell me this was published this year.” James rants as he tears several papers from the magazine, and Niki sneers, watching as Wilhelm slobbers on a chewy ring, enjoying some tummy time.

“I’ve got yet another article on how to lose the baby weight by starving yourself and working out somehow with the no time you have while raising a baby and keeping a house.” Niki rips a page out, followed by a second, “Ah, and another diet plan. Willie would have a heart attack if I showed him this.”

“Why are you ripping pages out of my magazines?” You ask as you step into the living room, and James pats the sofa between himself and Niki.

“We’re taking the nonsense out.” He informs you, and Niki greets you with a soft kiss as you sit beside him, earning himself a happy noise that has him grinning.

“And James is taking the knitting patterns.”

“They’re half-decent.” The Brit excuses himself, pecking your cheek.

“I can’t believe you’ve been reading this, Mouse. Every article was written by someone who hates women, you understand this, yes?” Niki asks, and you hesitate until his arm slips around your waist.

“That blond woman down the road, Bauer… She gave me one. She’s got three kids, so I thought…” You trail off, then sigh, leaning your head gently on Niki’s shoulder.

“You should take your child-rearing advice from your friends and family, Mouse. Liliana is a phone call away.” He reminds you, and you sigh, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

“I know. I just want to be a good wife and mother-”

“You are. You are my perfect wife, Mouse, and you have been a good, attentive mother to our son. Nothing in these magazines will improve you.” Niki cuts you off, and James pats your knee, then lays down on the floor with Wilhelm, letting the baby hold his finger in his tiny hand. You let Niki guide your head down onto his shoulder, closing your eyes and settling in, and as you melt into him like chocolate on a hot day, Niki realises exactly how starved for affection you’ve become. He sighs quietly, picking up the breast pumps from the dish towel beside him and handing them to you.

“This does not look comfortable.” You inform him, but you obediently unzip your dress from the side, letting it fall around your waist but no lower. James glances at you over his shoulder, wiggling his fingers for Wilhelm, and you let him look all he likes as you remove your bra and drop it beside you. You get situated against Niki, then get the pumps set up and begin the process.

“How is it?” James inquires a few minutes later, and you give him a small frown.

“There isn’t a tiny jaw mashing my nipple, but it's only marginally more comfortable.” You reply, nostrils flaring as you squeeze the pump. Uncomfortable didn't even begin to cover it.

“You’ll get used to it, love. Niki’ll make them feel better afterwards, won’t you, mate?” James coos from the floor, and you kick his foot gently, huffing a quiet laugh. For once, you have nearly an hour of full, uninterrupted time in which your baby has someone else physically capable of caring for him. He’s been fed recently enough that he should be fine for a bit, and he’s happy, and when he does begin to fuss, James offers to change him rather than make you stop pumping and get up. Having help is blissful.

“Have your feelings changed regarding James?” Niki asks quietly, and you shake your head, happy that he keeps checking in even though he asked you this same question before James arrived to visit, “Good.”

“Have yours?” You inquire, fairly sure you know the answer.

“No, Mouse, they haven’t.”

“Good.”

You feed Wilhelm some time later, change him for bed, then rock him to sleep in your arms. It takes time - your little one takes after you in having trouble falling asleep - but eventually you’re able to transfer him into his crib and head back downstairs. Niki and James are still in the living room, however they’ve moved since you left. Niki is mostly in the same spot, sprawled across the sofa to get comfortable. But, where once James sat on the floor, stretched out like a lazy lion, he now lays across your sofa. He’s lost his shirt in the transition, but otherwise, both men are still clothed. They’re kissing, which is a lovely sight, and James’ hand has slipped up under Niki’s shirt to stroke his trembling stomach. You can see the way Niki arches beneath James, his hips rolling up into the Brit’s in a needy way that tells you you haven’t been taking care of him as well as you thought you had.

You’re not jealous - truly, you’re not. It isn’t jealousy that festers in your guts. No, the rot that has taken a hold within you has been growing as your body changed. As who you are changed. As you brought your blessed son - the thing you love most - into the world, a disease had taken root. You once thought that you couldn’t love anything as much as you loved Niki, until Wilhelm was born with your heart beating in his chest along with his own. And that was part of the problem, wasn’t it? You were failing as a wife or as a mother no matter what choices you made, weren't you? Or had you simply placed the bar out of your reach in order to punish yourself for not being able to grasp it?

Everything had changed in a matter of months. You had gone from a newlywed preparing for your first child with your husband to a wife, mother, and caregiver who was struggling just to tread water. This new you - this exhausted, sad, disorganised you laden with baby weight and dark circles - was inferior to the old you, wasn’t it? Change for the better was an ideal, and something to strive for, but you had not improved, had you? You now exist as a lesser thing than the woman that Niki loved, and that he and James had so craved.

Your downward spiral is interrupted by a breathy gasp, and a low moan that you recognise as if it were your own. Your focus returns to your present, and your eyes meet the stormy baby blues of your husband. His mouth is lax with pleasure, but in your surprise, you find honesty awaiting you etched into the lines of his face. His love is plain to see, written in the softness of his gaze, the jumping pulse visible in his neck, and most obviously in the way he reaches for you.

Niki reaches for you. While blanketed by the sun incarnate, by his rival and close friend, by a man desired by countless people across the world, Niki Lauda reaches for you. The sun moves atop him, golden skin flexing over built muscles, and the blue of the sky on a warm summer day finds you. Warmth suffuses you, sinking deep into your bones and heating you up from the inside out as James grins. He doesn't love you, but there is a deeply held affection in his gaze as he looks upon you. He doesn’t love you, but he has had you more than once, and he keeps coming back for more, something he has always been reticent to do in other relationships.

“Started without me?” You ask, and your voice cracks, but you swallow down your emotion and let yourself be infected by their lust. You lace your fingers with Niki’s as soon as you’re within reach and sit at his head, shifting over a little bit so Niki can rest his head in your lap. You grasp his other hand and hold both gently in your hands, lifting them so you can kiss his fingers. James takes the opportunity you give him, kissing his way down Niki’s chest and nipping gently at the curve of his stomach. You transfer both of his hands into one of yours, then let the other trail down Niki’s body, combing your fingers back through James’ hair to grab hold of it.

“Ahhh, fuck.” James rumbles, letting you pull his head back, his eyes rolling back in his head.

“Would you mind helping me out, puppy?” You ask in a light, playful voice while letting go of his hair to instead stroke his cheek. He sighs blissfully, leaning into your hand to nuzzle gently, nodding his head, “Good boy, pup. Yes, you are. Good puppies don’t use their words, they just wag their tails and do as they’re told, don’t they?”

James nods again, his hips pressing into Niki’s and forcing a broken groan from your husband’s lips.

“Good boy. Now, would you mind undressing my husband for me, puppy?”

Niki lets out a little laugh as James hops right to it, pushing Niki’s shirt up to tangle around his arms that you’re still holding in place. You release his hands, pulling his shirt up to tangle around his wrists, then reach down to stroke your hand over his chest. His pecs have a little layer of softness overtop, giving you something to grab ahold of and squeeze, drawing a shaky gasp out of Niki’s lips.

“Is this comfortable, Niki? Or would you prefer your arms lower?” You ask, and Niki stretches a little, then settles.

“It is fine. I will let you know if I am uncomfortable.” He promises, and you hum your approval, rolling his nipples between your fingers as a reward while James wiggles Niki’s pants down over his slim hips.

“Puppy, leave Niki’s underwear for now. Be a good boy and take your own clothes off now. Puppies don’t wear clothes, do they, silly thing?” You croon, and James hops off the couch quickly, pulling his shirt up over his head and tossing it, then hurrying to unbutton his jeans. You stroke your hands down over Niki’s body, and he moans as your breasts brush against his face, pressing a kiss into your cleavage while you slide your bare palms down over his stomach. You begin to sit up more, but Niki moves his ‘restrained’ hands to grasp at your chest, and you giggle nervously as you catch them.

“Naughty, Niki, love.” You hum, but he’s already got you figured out, and you soon find yourself pressed back into the sofa beneath your husband.

“Why aren’t you letting me touch you?” Niki asks, and you hesitate, “Is this more of the bullshit from magazines?”

“I look different, Niki.” You mumble, and he sighs, looking over your fully clothed body with love and regret in his eyes.

“I have not shown you enough affection. I forgot to tell you how beautiful you are - I have not told you since the hospital, have I?” Niki muses, and James scoffs, giving your husband a gentle push to the shoulder.

“Christ, mate, no wonder-”

“James, you may help or you can be dog. Pick one. But dogs do not talk.” Niki cuts him off while coaxing you to shift so that he can unzip your dress. James sits beside you, running his fingers through your hair and tilting your head so he can kiss you, soft and gentle but no less passionate.

“My perfect little Mausi, taking care of me, and the house, and our son with very little thanks. You must tell me when you have needs, Mausi, I cannot read your mind. And do not give me bullshit about not wanting to be a burden. You are my wife - you could never be a burden. You take such good care of everyone, Mausi. You make it look so effortless that I have clearly taken you for granted, haven’t I?” Niki murmurs as he rids you of your dress, then kisses his way down your neck, unclasping your bra as he goes.

“The Rat hasn’t told you how beautiful you are, Mouse, so let me.” James whispers against your lips, stroking your cheeks as you lean into his hands, “Look at you. How did a woman as stunning as you become touch-starved? You’re so beautiful, Mouse. Don’t give me that look - you are! And no less gorgeous than you were before, either. Motherhood has made your body softer and all the better for holding.”

You shiver as he kisses his way down the other side of your neck, pausing only to help Niki take your bra off and discard it. They trail down together, and you nearly jump out of your skin as warm hands grasp your breasts and squeeze gently. Niki is the first to take initiative, swirling his tongue around the soft bud of your nipple then popping it into his mouth. He moans around a mouthful of you, and it takes everything in you to avoid grabbing his hair, and to instead be gentle with him. James watches for a moment before following suit, taking your nipple into his mouth and sucking, thrilled to find you much less gentle with him. Your fingers tangle in his golden locks, pulling sharply on his hair, your head thrown back on the sofa cushions with astonishment.

“Tastes so good, Mausi.” Niki moans as he swallows a mouthful of milk, his eyes half-lidded with desire, “you’re so soft. I’ve never felt anything so soft.”

You whine, cheeks hot with embarrassment and delight intertwined as you struggle to comprehend the message that they’re both clearly trying to drill into your thick skull. James adjusts a little, and you pet his hair as he rubs the length of his cock against your thigh, grinding in little circles.

“You’re so hard, James.” You manage to squeak out, and he moans around a mouthful of you, blinking open those sky-blue eyes to stare up at you as he grinds a little harder, “Niki got you worked up, didn’t he?”

“Niki started it. You got me here.” James replies after finally releasing you with a wet smack.

“The chance to have me raw got you-” You begin to excuse, and Niki cuts you off with a kiss.

“Getting to feel you without a rubber in the way is exciting, Mouse, but the important part of it is because it’s you. I’ve never cared about having to wear a condom. But getting to have you? I’d do a hell of a lot for a chance with you.” James corrects you, squeezing your hips and groaning at the plush of them, “Can’t decide if I want to face you or take you from behind, y’know? Perfect bloody tits and those soft lips, or that fucking beautiful ass of yours pressing into my hips. Think I could have both?”

You giggle into the kiss even as you nod, and Niki breaks it to kiss your cheek, “I know how I want you.”

“Do you?” You inquire playfully, already feeling like a weight has been lifted from your chest.

“Mmm, but you might have to stretch first.” Niki teases, and you laugh, brushing your thumb delicately over his cheek while you cup his face softly in your hand.

“As long as you help me.” You purr, stealing a kiss from your husband and stroking his hip, then tugging his underwear down his thighs, “Take these off now.”

Niki obediently kicks them off, getting comfortable beside you while you pull James into a kiss and nip his bottom lip, sucking it into your mouth. You pull the golden blond closer to you until his pelvis presses against your thigh, then give his ass a firm squeeze, nipping him as he chases your retreating lips.

“Go ahead, puppy. You can hump my leg if you want.” You purr, turning your attention back to your husband and wrapping your fingers around his cock. He’s achingly hard in your hand, the tip flushed red and leaking precum which you swipe up with your thumb to ease the glide. Niki wraps his lips back around your nipple, swirling his tongue around the hard bud while James snuggles closer and follows suit. You find yourself lost in sensation as James rolls his hips into your thigh and Niki fucks the tight precum-slick circle of your fingers, both moaning around you. You’re not surprised that Niki cracks first, crawling between your legs and spreading them open into the space he was once occupying.

“Mausi?” Niki murmurs like a question, and you know what he’s asking. You pull him closer, kissing him so softly it’s barely a whisper.

“I told you, you don’t have to ask me, Niki. I always want you.”

The reminder of your words from so long ago rings heavy for Niki, full of love and promise, and he doesn’t ask again before pressing the head of his cock inside of you. It’s been a very long time, and thus it takes a moment of gently rocking his hips to get all the way in, but you both sigh at the sensation. Niki is gentle as he pushes your leg up against the back of the couch to get a bit more room, making sure not to stretch too far. James lets out a soft whine you barely thought him capable of, sweet as sugar, and you smile at him as you bring him down into a kiss.

“Wait your turn, pup. I promise I’ll let you have me.” You murmur, but you’re generous (and conscious) enough to wrap a slick hand around his aching cock and give him something to fuck into for now. James’ refractory period is notoriously short, and his libido is high enough to keep up with two partners easily, so you know you’ll have to take care of him more than once. Especially with Niki’s condition being what it is - capable of sex, but certainly not of anything too strenuous.

Your husband seems to be trying to prove you wrong, each rough thrust going deep and pulling soft ‘ah ah ah’s from his lips. He’s pent up, your poor love. His cheeks are pink with the effort, eyes hazy and darker blue from how blown his pupils are. You pull him down into a gentle kiss, rolling your hips to meet him while your other hand remains busy with James. It’s a bit clumsy - you surprised Niki, and he hadn’t aimed very well - but you’ve never been particularly good at multitasking, and you’re sure James prefers you focusing what little dexterity you have to the hand stroking his cock.

“Close.” Niki whispers into the kiss, and you practically purr, nuzzling your nose against his.

“Good. Come for me, Niki.”

“Fill her up, Nik, I wanna fuck your cum into her.” James groans, and Niki shivers, his rhythm breaking for a moment. He never quite recovers, but you don’t blame him. You hug him close to you, releasing James in order to hold your husband while he shatters in your arms, his hips rolling in sloppy grinds to try to get deeper and maintain the sensation for as long as he can.

“I love you.” You whisper, and Niki gasps it back to you as he lets you take his weight. Sensing James’ impatience, your husband sighs as he pulls out of your blissful heat, swapping places on the couch so he still has a good view.

“Do you think you’ve earned it, puppy?” You ask, and James grins, rubbing your hips.

“Oh, definitely.”

A snort leaves you, but you lean in for a kiss despite his impertinence, “How do you want me?”

“Hands and knees, please.” James replies in a bit of a sing-song voice, and he helps you adjust, his large hands finding home on your hips. You open your mouth to tease him, but he’s quicker on the draw, and you find your words lost as he thrusts into you. His groan is one of bliss - you know he’s fucked other women raw before, so you’re unsure why he’s so thrilled with the chance with you, but you wouldn’t have it any other way. Having him want you - need you - this badly is almost more than you can handle. What did you do to deserve this? Why does James keep coming back to you when he’s so obviously desirable - capable of having anyone he wants whenever he wants. You’d say it’s for Niki, but James knows he can fuck Niki if he wants and he’s chosen to fuck you instead.

“You feel so good, Mouse. So fucking good. Sloppy with Niki’s cum. So hot and tight and pulling me in deeper.” James praises you, pressing a line of kisses up your spine that have you shivering, “If it were to be anyone, it would be you two.”

Your heart swells, and you rock back into him eagerly, heat coursing through you at the idea of having James around more often. You’ve never resented him for not being around all the time, and you were with Niki before James became a part of your relationship, but you do miss him when he’s gone. You know Niki does too. You wish sometimes that he could be with you two all the time, but you know he needs his freedom. You know that he wouldn’t be able to give up his flings, and the fun he has when he’s not with you and Niki. You know that it would stifle him, and you’d never want to ask that of him. You’re happy in your marriage, and if James found a relationship that worked for him, you would never hold it against him should he break it off with you. That being said, you were happy to have him while you could. James fit with you and Niki - not like a missing piece, but like a welcome and enriching addition. You and Niki are whole without James, but having him around is special.

You breathe his name, eyes rolling back in your head as James angles your hips and plunges deeper on his next thrust. He presses a firm hand in the centre of your sweaty back, low moans falling from his lips as he fucks you harder, deeper, his thrusts beginning to lose rhythm.

“You’re driving me mad, love. Fucking mental. How’s a man meant to keep his head with pussy this fucking good?” He croons, stroking his hand down the curve of your back to smack your ass gently.

“I-I thought it would be worse after giving birth.” You admit shakily, and James scoffs, spanking you a little harder almost as punishment.

“Ridiculous. No, you’re fucking perfect, Mouse. Feel like heaven, so tight and wet and sweet. I’m fucking all of Niki’s cum out of you, making a mess of the sofa, yeah? Don’t worry, I’m gonna - fuck - I’m gonna replace it all. Fill you up.”

James grunts as he redoubles his efforts, fucking into you harder, his breathing harsh as he gets closer. You can feel him throbbing inside of you, and you nearly yelp as familiar fingers press and roll your clit just right while James clutches your hips so tightly it nearly hurts. He fucks you harder, a desperate groan slipping from his lips as he tips over the edge and fucks his spend into you like he’s trying to plant it in your womb. You’re sure your cervix is going to be sore later, but you couldn’t care less right now.

No, all you care about is the way James tips back on the couch, dragging you with him to lay back against his chest, still balls deep inside of you.

“You look good together.” Niki murmurs, sighing as he gets shakily to his feet, “Let’s move to the bedroom - there’s not enough space down here.”

Later that evening, after having to crawl out of bed to feed your son, you snuggle down between Niki and James while they stroke your bare skin and whisper gentle praises. James strokes his thumb under your eye, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. 

“You look tired, Mouse. Get some rest.” He whispers, and Niki peppers kisses across your shoulders.

“We should go to Ibiza. Get away, enjoy the warmth, and find someone to help with the baby to give us time for each other.” Niki murmurs, hugging you tightly from behind while James pets your hair back out of your face. You’d love to say that you agreed wholeheartedly and kissed them both goodnight, but truthfully, you were asleep before Niki even finished his sentence.

The next morning, you all pack up your belongings and head to the airstrip. Niki flies you all to Ibiza, and you get a call less than an hour after getting to your lavish home from Liliana.

“I’ve been trying to reach you for hours, honey. Tony and I have hopefully very good news!” Liliana coos, and you pin the phone between your ear and your shoulder as you position Wilhelm in your arms to let him latch.

“What’s the news? Sorry, Lil, we just flew out today. You must have gotten the voicemail from me before we arrived.” You reply, watching as James and Niki rub sunscreen into each other by the pool.

“We’re moving to Ibiza, honey. We want to be closer to you. I’m getting bored being at home with nothing to do while Tony’s gone, and we were talking, and we thought maybe I could help you out a little. You’ve got so much on your plate.” Liliana rambles, clearly thinking you might be upset, though you can’t imagine why.

“Liliana, please, stop. I’m thrilled. I miss you both so much, all the time. It’s hard being here alone, without my family. And I do need help. I was just talking to Niki about getting someone to help us. Having you here with me would mean so much to me, and to Niki too. He loves you and Tony. If there’s anything I can do to help you guys, let me know.” You interrupt, and Liliana giggles.

“Well, about that. We might have already bought a place. We’re packing up our apartment right now.” Liliana admits, and you cheer, “So, we’ll be in Ibiza in a week, and our belongings are going to be arriving a little while after us.”

You smile, pressing a gentle kiss to Wilhelm’s forehead as he gurgles, milkdrunk and happy.

“I can’t wait to see you. We’ve got a bright future ahead of us, Lil.” You murmur, and Liliana laughs happily.

“There’s my girl. You sound like you’re a bit more yourself, don’t you? I’ll call you when we get to town, okay?”

“Okay. Love you both. Tell Tony I can’t wait to see him lying by the pool like a boiled lobster.” You tease, and Liliana’s cackles make you beam. Finally, you have hope for the future. And perhaps now, knowing help is coming, you’ll be able to enjoy having James around. James had promised to stay with you for as long as he could, unless you got sick of him. He’ll help both you and Niki find and care for your happiness - and you both clearly need the help. Together, you will figure out how to move forwards.

Together.

[ellecdc]

Hiiii! I have a request, poly!marauders x animagus!fem reader (you decide what type of animal) and everytime it’s full moon she turn into an animagus and watches hboyfriends (kinda lurks around secretly) as they take care of Remus. The thing is they don’t know that she’s an animagus, and what would their reaction be when they found out?

(You’re an amazing writer and your fics makes my day🫶🏻)

this was so sweet - thanks for your request and for your patience in me getting this to you!

please note: my requests are currently closed as I finish exams and work through the requests that I currently have.

poly!marauders x fem!reader who's a secret animagus

Prongs was very confused.

This was the third moon in a row that he, Padfoot, Wormtail, and Moony had been romping through the woods when Moony seemed to get caught up on something.

He wasn’t sure what had changed; they always followed the same routine: transform in the shack, let Moony out, follow their trail where they can run (and roll, in Moony & Padfoots case) down a large hill, chase each other along the river bank, drink from the edge of the Black Lake, and slowly make their way back to the shack for Moony’s transformation. 

Except, once again, they seemed to be caught up under this unassuming tree.

Prongs looked to his canine companion who offered what he could only assume as a doggy shoulder shrug as Moony yipped and stood on his hind legs in an attempt to see through the lowest bows of the tree.

The first time this happened, Moony almost took one of Padfoot’s legs off for trying to encourage him to leave the tree. 

The second time, Moony could only be convinced to leave as his bones actually started stretching and reorganising themselves as the transformation started.

What was even stranger, though? After both of those moons, Remus woke up in a panic asking where you were and if you were ‘okay’.

It took Sirius shifting back into Padfoot and laying across Remus’ chest in order to provide grounding pressure to his chest before they could get him to calm back down and convince him that you were safe.

James hated seeing this side of Remus; the side of him that none of them had seen since before the Marauders told him that they knew his secret. He felt horribly paranoid, reclusive, and entirely too guilty. 

Guilty for daring to love you even though he felt you deserved better. Guilty for allowing you to love a werewolf. Guilty for not telling you that you were in love with a werewolf. And guilty for lying to you about it every month.

Sirius and James hated the secrecy too - but it wasn’t their secret to tell. They loved you, but they couldn’t take away Remus’ autonomy when it came to his infliction.

But, tonight - the third moon in a row of this nonsense from Moony - and Prongs had had it.

Prongs bowed his head and scooped Wormtail up into his antlers, hoisting him up to the lowest branch of this damned tree Moony was fucking obsessed with and encouraged him to investigate. 

Moony let out a little whine and a huff as he sat and watched the little rat disappear through the bows of the grand pine. 

A squeak alerted the two animagi and one werewolf to trouble when the top branches began to move and out flew a large black crow with a rat trapped in its talons. 

The crow gently glided to the ground about ten feet away from the trio and let go of the rat who quickly ran up Prong’s leg and situated himself in the safety of his antlers. 

Padfoot - ever protective of his pack of misfit toys animals - began stalking toward the offending bird, sure that Moony was just as excited as he was about this impromptu hunt. It wasn’t their favourite - it was not a rabbit - but it would do. 

However, much to both Padfoot and Prongs’ surprise, Moony quickly leapt in front of the crow and grumbled warningly at Padfoot, going so far as to bare his teeth at his pack member. 

Padfoot tilted his head in confusion at Moony as if perhaps the situation would make more sense at a 45 degree angle, but it appeared that it made no difference when Pads ultimately huffed and turned back towards Prongs. 

Prongs wanted to laugh - but deer stags couldn’t do that - so he let out a ‘bleat’ as the crow flew above Padfoot and teasingly landed on his head.

Padfoot, ready for a fight, turned to nip at the bird who simply jumped back up and hovered just out of reach of the dog.

Prongs was suddenly even more confused.

What crow willingly releases a plump, likely juicy, rat from its talons instead of enjoying it as their meal? And what crow willingly teases a large werewolf sized dog in front of his werewolf friend? 

This one, apparently.

And Moony - usually very possessive and exclusionary when it came to the other creatures they came across in the Forbidden Forest - seemed not only accepting of this new addition, but really quite pleased with it. 

But it was time to go if Moony’s flinches and groaning was any indication; the transformation would happen soon. 

Padfoot moved towards Moony and affectionately nudged him with his shoulder, hoping to encourage him towards the Shrieking Shack. 

Moony seemed to understand that he ought to go, but couldn’t bring himself to leave without his newest friend.

Somehow - to Prongs’ absolute astonishment - the crow seemed to understand what the hold up was and flew over to situate itself on Prongs’ antler.

Prongs - far too tired after a night full of romping with a werewolf directly after a full day of classes - acquiesced to being a glorified chauffeur for his smaller friends and led the way to the shack. 

The crow sat quietly on the top of the old fireplace as the Marauders went about business as usual. 

Padfoot convinced Moony to curl up on the bed so he would wake up at least semi-comfortably, whilst Prongs used his antlers to encourage a blanket up around Moony so he wouldn’t wake up completely nude, and Peter ran back towards the castle to give the lovers some privacy. 

Once Moony returned fully to Remus, Prongs and Padfoot took a moment to shift back to their own human forms and started up on the healing process, completely forgetting about their interloper.

With a groan, Remus came to after James encouraged healing potion down his throat.

“I’m sorry, Moons.” He apologised in a whisper as he handed the empty vial to Sirius’ waiting hand.

“Where is she?” Remus croaked. 

“Where’s who, babe?” Sirius asked, sharing a concerned glance with James. 

Remus choked in his attempt to respond and both boys began shushing him. “Dovey.” He finally got out.

“She’s at the castle, Moons…she’s safe.” James placated.

“No.” Remus argued. “She was there.”

James turned to see if Sirius had any idea how to handle their boyfriend’s insanity when he spotted it behind Sirius.

The crow.

“You.” He whispered in awe, causing Sirius to whip his head around.

The crow hopped down from the mantle of the fireplace and landed gracefully on the floor before it spun and grew back into you.

“Dovey.” Remus groaned. James turned to see there were tears in Remus’ eyes, though he knew not what for. 

“Hiya Moons.” You answered shyly, shooting guilty glances at Sirius who was still staring at you in shock and to James who was looking frantically between you and Remus.

“It’s been you?” James asked incredulously.

“How long have you known?” Remus asked at the same time.

You smiled sadly at Remus and knelt down beside him. “Long enough to become an animagi?”

“You sneaky little witch.” Sirius finally let out with a breath, sitting down unceremoniously at the foot of the bed to look at you.

“I’m sorry. Please don’t be mad.” You begged quickly; eyes darting nervously between your three boyfriends.

“You’re worried about us being mad?” Sirius asked disbelievingly. 

“Angel, you’ve caught us sneaking around and lying to you.” James teased with a certain level of sincerity, nudging you with his shoulder. 

“Do you hate me?” Remus whispered, eyes still trained steadfast on you.

You looked at him like he had grown three heads.

“Remus, I love you. That’s why I’m here.” You pressed severely. 

Remus laughed out a sob and covered his face with his hands. 

“I’m sorry, but what the fuck were you thinking?” Sirius asked suddenly.

“What?” You responded warily.

“Casually inserting yourself into a werewolf pack! What would you have done if Moony hated you?” He barked, flinging a hand towards Remus’ general direction.

You scoffed derisively and shot Remus a look like ‘can you believe this guy?’ “I’m impossible not to love, Sirius. Do keep up.”

Your cheek earned you a scoff before Sirius was launching himself at you and the two of you fell to the floor, disturbing layers of dust and causing the particles to dance through the air. 

“You’re so lucky you're cute.” Sirius said in faux contempt as he peppered your jaw and neck with kisses. 

James sighed in relief as he looked back over at Remus who was watching the two of you with a look so full of fondness, James was surprised he couldn’t see hearts pouring out of his eyes.

“You okay, Rem?” James asked him quietly, pulling one of his hands to his mouth and pressing a kiss to his palm.

“Perfect, Jamie. Just perfect.” Remus said with a content smile and a single happy tear trailing down his cheek.

James was more than inclined to agree.

[verstarppen]

I SAW SMTH ABOUT YOU NEEDING LOGAN SMAU IDEAS AND OH BOY DO I HAVE ONE!! So basically, reader is logans childhood best friend. Always loved gymnastics, and logan always went to all of her recitals and big competitions, and she went to all of his karting practices and races. Now they are grown up and reader is a professional gymnast competing in the Olympics for America, and logan is a professional f1 driver. They are still so close, and they have been dating since they were like 16, but none of the f1 world knows that, they just believe they are friends. Reader manages to get gold at the Olympics so logan does a whole ass simp appreciation post hardlaunching their relationship and giving all of their fans whiplash.

summary; logan has a very special helmet reveal on instagram to celebrate your olympics gold metal and a scavenger hunt seems like the appropriate way to reveal it to you

pairing; logan sargeant x fem! olympic gymnast! reader [ no faceclaim ]

a/n; girl who starts breathing like darth vader after three flights of stairs: yeah i can write from an olympic gymnast's pov that's fine; i've also never been in japan so pinterest was my best friend here

liked by olympics, logansargeant, olliebearman and 3,801,506 others

ynusername the feminine urge to walk around tokyo aimlessly

view all 100,844 comments

vertiddieenjoyer your pfp is such a jumpscare please change it

ynusername never. logansargeant Please? ynusername over my dead body

osc_pastry WILLIAMS MISSING IN THE LIKES 💀

olliebearman Congrats on both wins :)

armstrongslayer NAHHHH setbackhamilttel "call an ambulance, call an ambulance- but not for me" julyestie guys stop giggling...we're on a crime scene

liked by ynusername, liamlawson30, oscarpiastri and 1,400,789 others

logansargeant Thinking of you. Always.

view all 479,007 comments

oscarpiastri How kind of you

logansargeant 😐

roboclaren WHAT WAS THAT....OKAY....JAMES

haas_shaker i too, think of james vowels always forzapluto NOT AFTER WHAT HE PULLED IN AUSTRALIA

bbglewis do you hear that? the sounds of hundreds of f1 wag accounts STOMPING in your direction

mcmango y/n is punching the floor rn

albon_goated oscar too

pierrette girlfriend reveal when

typicallyleclerc It's gotta be that model Caryl Zarubin? Weren't they spotted together at a restaurant recently? lionkingseb no i think he was there with his best friend and she happened to see them and asked for a picture, they don't follow each other on social media or anything like that so it's unlikely typicallyleclerc Ohh, I didn't know that. Thank you.

liked by ynusername, alex_albon, jv.f1 and 2,870,475 others

logansargeant I contemplated how to word this for a long time, but I finally feel ready. For as long as I have known you, you've been a pillar of hope. Someone I can count on. Someone who tells the bullies off when I couldn’t. The first person I ran to after getting my first win.

To see you achieve something as great as an olympic gold metal has made me eternally grateful to be called yours. I can’t promise a win anytime soon, let alone a championship, but I can promise to commemorate you while there's still a stage light above me.

Your shine is brighter than any star, but I’ve tried to replicate it. Congratulations on your achievement, love. I hope you like the surprise 😉

view all 870,140 comments

ynusername YOU ABSOLUTE SAP

logansargeant For you? Always 😌

alex_albon @ ynusername Am I forgiven? I helped with the design

ynusername some sins cannot be forgiven so easily, alexander ynusername im joking ofc you're forgiven, it's not humanly possible for anyone to stay mad at you for long

feeltheorange oh so they're...oh

albogeant this is so sweet i think i feel cavities forming

redbullpapaya STOPPPPP

mcmango nevermind, it's just oscar punching the floor rn

albon_goated A WIN IS A WIN

liked by logansargeant, frederikvestiofficial, arthur_leclerc and 3,151,889 others

ynusername more priceless than any medal

view all 1,988,475 comments

oscarpiastri Okay then, give it to me

ynusername fuck off you can pull it away from my cold dead hands

logansargeant Time to announce the best date competition winner

ynusername you have no competition frederikvestiofficial This couldn't have been more fun than the Ghibli museum :( olliebearman you have to be squidding me oscarpiastri Woomp Woomp arthur_leclerc I would've won olliebearman yeah right olliebearman tuna in next time

ynusername absolutely not, im not doing any more side quests

pic credits; instagram and pinterest

fic-specific taglist; @spilled-coffee-cup @onecojg @cixrosie @sheridamn @namgification @thehufflepuffavenger1 @sxrcxsm26 @mehrmonga @mellowarcadefun

blog taglist; @wtfisakilometer2 @aexitizen-ln4 @localwhoore @onecojg @sheridamn @cixrosie @gulabjamooon @melozyxo @spilled-coffee-cup @biitch-with-wifi @coffeehurricanes @iifloweringnightsii @jsjcue @lanando4 @fastcarsandshit @christianpulisic10 @allygatcr @marshmummy @lavenderhazeeworld @ravisinghs-wife @namgification @sheridamn @whatislifebutlemons @demvnsriot @stinkyjax @sxrcxsm26 @beskardroids @tbsloneely @yourmumsdirtysock @elliegrey2803 @mael1pastry @mehrmonga @marymustdie @mellowarcadefun @geniusalpaca

(uni is draining me save me pookies)

[thesweetestofdreams]

hot chocolate

pairings: poly!marauders x reader (852 words)

warnings: should be none, just a little stress cry/ burnout

a/n: Do I like this? I have no idea. The boys help to comfort you on a late night that has you stressed.

Reaching out to his left, James expects to find your warmth. Instead all he feels are empty sheets. The fuzziness of sleep threatens to pull him back down, but your absence keeps him up. 

He pads through your small apartment doing his best not to wake your boyfriends still sleeping behind him. The small spike of panic he felt at not finding you eases as he finally does. 

You've got your back to him, typing away at your computer at the kitchen table. 

"And I'm the one not allowed to have coffee after six," he says softly once he's closer. You hardly glance at him, still typing. "Love," he says, a hand gently coming to cover yours. "Do you know how late it is?" 

Your heart melts as you finally look at him. He's rubbing sleep from his eyes, knocking his glasses off kilter. He looks warm and soft around the edges. It's enticing but your work's not going to do itself. "I'll come to bed in just a minute, Jamie. I should really finish this." 

He points at the time on your computer, 3:48 blares at you and you realize how much your eyes sting from staring at the screen. "Come on," he says, his grip now a soft tug at your wrist. 

"Just let me finish this paragraph." You're trying to bargain, having the feeling you'll probably lose. 

"It can wait, love." He's looking at you with soft eyes and you can feel the warmth radiating off of him. You hear shuffling behind you. Now you're really in for it.

Remus comes into view, his oversized shirt- probably one of James’- askew on his shoulders, followed by a scowling Sirius. “How dare you make us go on a man-hunt at three in the morning.” Sirius crosses his arms trying to look angry, but he still comes up to rest his chin on your shoulder. His nose tickles your cheek, “Let’s go to bed my love.”

Remus walks further into the kitchen of your tiny apartment. You remember the day you moved in, you ate ramen over a cardboard box as a kitchen table. Now as he stands across the table from you Remus reaches over to slowly close your laptop. 

You stop him halfway, and he gives you a knowing look. “I’m really not tired, honestly I won't be able to sleep until I finish this,” you say quickly returning to typing. 

Remus sighs, looking to James for help, but it’s Sirius who comes to his aid. “Well then I guess we’re all staying up,” Sirius says, his chin digging into your shoulder and sleep muddling his words, “but when I wake up with dark circles that’s on you.”

“No go to bed, I won’t be long.” You try to focus on your work, but Sirius worms his arms under yours, wrapping around you. “Siri, please.” Your head is starting to hurt from forcing your eyes to stay open, and the warmth coming off of him only makes the fight harder. 

“What are you doing, Remus?” you ask, hearing the kitchen cabinets open and close. 

“I’m making hot chocolate.” He grabs your favorite mug from the cabinet followed by three more. 

“You don’t have to do that Rem.” Your eyes are still stinging.

“I already opened the packet.” He says it with a finality that tells you, you’ve hardly any choice in the matter.

“I’ll get the marshmallows,” James adds, sounding far too excited for this time of night. 

Before you can stop it your eyes fill with tears, blurring your computer screen. You hide your face in your hands. “Are you okay, love?” Sirius asks, suddenly sounding much more awake. You can’t stop it as much as you want to, your tears flow leaving your boyfriends flustering to help you. 

“Dove.” Remus kneels beside you. “Let’s take a break, yeah? It can wait until tomorrow.” 

You hear the soft click of your computer shutting as you nod. James holds your hand across the table. “You’re all too nice to me,” you say, it comes out half laugh half sob. 

“All that work is scrambling your brain,” Sirius says, squeezing your shoulders.

You let Remus pull you to the couch where he brushes stray tears from your cheeks. You melt into his side. He plants soft kisses into your hair. 

James and Sirius come with cups of hot chocolate almost overflowing with marshmallows. The cups are soon abandoned as the rich chocolate threatens to drag you all to sleep right on the spot. 

When you eventually make it to bed through fits of yawns and tired shuffling, you realize you’re finally exactly where you want to be. Sirius falls asleep practically on top of James.

Remus pulls the blanket to your chin. “Too nice,” he laughs quietly to himself. You swat at his arm. As you fall asleep, he listens to the rise and fall of your breath. You deserve all the niceness of the world, and he would make hot chocolate in the middle of every night if it meant you felt even a bit of it.

[weixuldo]

Who's your Daddy?

Older!James Kelly x f!reader

(SORRY FOR BEING GONE SO LONG OMLLLL- i’ve never written anything other than starwars lol- but I hope this is enjoyable. I also havent ever written fauxscest and I wouldn't say i'm really into it, but I feel like it fits the character lowkey)

One of James' customer mistakes you for his daughter and you actually play along...James isnt thrilled

warnings: dead dove do not eat?, Fauxscest, age gap, orgasm denial, just regular schmegular smex, name calling,

________________

 “Fuck Jamie!” you squealed as DILF!James Kelly harshly bent you over the old camaro that had been sitting in his shop for the past two weeks. 

His strong tattooed hand had your nicely curled hair in a strong grip as he smacked your ass with the other. “You wanna act like a child so bad, then I’ll treat you like one” he said as he continued to spank you. 

Earlier, James had been finishing up a job on an old Ford pickup and was negotiating payment with the owner when you skipped out from inside the shop wearing shorts and a tank top.

In James’ “office”- really just a room with a chair and desk that he’d toss papers on (or eat you out on)- he had a bowl of candy just in case a client brought around their kids. James never really knew what to do with kids, but you told him having a candy jar would make him seem less scary.

Of course he had one the next day.

But clients never really brought their kids around the shop so you got to enjoy the majority of the candy. Today you were feeling the cherry lollipop and twirled it around your mouth as you scampered out to see what James was up to. 

As you walked out you saw James broad back facing you as he stood with his arms crossed towards a gruff man with gray hair. They looked like they were talking shop- how boring.

You sighed and were about to go back inside when the gray haired man noticed you. 

“Kelly, you never mentioned ya had kids?”. 

James was taken aback- kids? 

He turned to see what the man was looking at when his icy eyes landed on your tantalizing form; it was nearly 97 degrees and humid as fuck- why the hell did you look so good?

He subconsciously licked his bottom lip before remembering the man’s comment; he turned back just about to protest when you skipped up to him and threw your arms around him. 

“He’s never mentioned me?” you said with a fake pout. 

“But dad- I thought you were proud of me? Why don’t you tell your friends about me?” 

James was too stunned to speak- sure, you’d occasionally call him “daddy” in bed but he never thought that act would leave the bedroom. His left eye twitched as he looked down at your doe eyed expression. 

“Haha- I’m sure yer Dad’s proud of ya kiddo- probably just wanted to hide you away cause you’d have all the boys riled up” the gray haired man chuckled as James fought to keep his frustration at bay. 

“Is that why daddy?” you asked innocently. 

James was pissed

…

and extremely turned on.

But he was really bothered that his client was obviously checking you out right in front of him. He clenched his jaw once more before straining out an answer. 

“Yea thats why, sweetheart. I’d hate to have to get the shotgun out of the shed for something other than hunting” he falsely smiled. 

You hugged him once more before heading back inside “Well I’ll let you two keep talking- Thanks for choosing my dad’s shop” you smiled at the man before your boyfriend. 

He shot back a bright grin “Not a problem darlin’, I’ll be sure to come to yer Dad’s shop from now on haha”. 

James clenched his fists at his sides, he could feel himself losing his composure.

The man finally paid James and added a little extra and told him to “buy somethin’ nice for that daughter of yer’s”. 

Oh- James would definitely not be buying you something nice after the little stunt you just pulled. 

“She's a looker Kelly, better keep an eye on her'' the man commented once more before hopping into his newly fixed truck. 

James just nodded as he counted the money the man paid him, “Yea, i’m always lookin at her- especially when she's bouncing on my cock”. 

The old man’s eyes almost popped out of his sockets; “Pardon?!”. 

James finally met his eye once more with a smug look, “Yea, she’s not my daughter- that’s my girlfriend”. 

The man just sat with the truck held in reverse as he tried to replay the whole interaction. 

“And I’m gonna fuck her raw for that shit she just pulled- Thanks for the tip and have a nice day” he said before shoving the cash into his pocket and shutting the garage gate. 

You had taken a seat at James’ desk as you mindlessly scrolled on your phone. You thought it was funny to play with him like that but you didn’t think it would get him too worked up- so when you heard him call for you to come out to the garage your body buzzed with nervous excitement. 

He had called your name harsher than he normally would so you could tell he was feeling some type of way but you couldn’t quite put your finger on what… were you about to be lectured, yelled at, or fucked? 

Maybe all three heh

James was standing domineeringly with his feet slightly parted and arms crossed tight as you entered the garage. 

“Yesss? What’s wrong Jamie” you answered innocently. 

He clicked his tongue and cut his eyes, “you know damn well what you were doing”. 

You pouted your pretty lips and shook your head, “I don’t really see anything wrong with joking” you said smugly. 

Annnd now you’re here, bent over his camaro with him ruthlessly plunging his thick cock in and out of you.

James’ veins popped as he tugged at your hair with one hand and angled your hips up with the other. He was panting like an animal as he forcefully thrusted into you, heavy balls slapping against your swollen clit. 

“Fuck, please! Jamie- Slow down!” you cried as you grounded yourself on the hood of the old car as your boyfriend hit it from the back. 

“Jamie?” he questioned, squeezing your ass harder.

“James!” you managed.

He let out a low chuckle that made you even wetter than before, “you wanted to call me dad so bad earlier, what happened, doll?”. 

You could hear his stupid smirk in the way he spoke, you wanted to say something but all that was coming out were pathetic whimpers and moans.

You felt him shudder as you clenched your gummy walls around his throbbing cock- “s-shit” he cursed under his breath as he slowly pulled out until just his tip was left in you. 

Your eyes were already brimming with tears-but when he stopped his movements, the tears started to flow. Your poor pussy ached for him to slide between your folds- once he started, you needed him to finish. 

It was almost criminal how empty you felt without your boyfriend’s dick inside of you. You began to whine the longer he held still. 

“You think you’re so slick, little brat” he growled as his rough palm made contact with your bright red ass cheek for the umpteenth time. 

He leaned down to whisper in your ear and you felt the cool silver of his cross chain as it slid down your arched spine. 

“Who am I” he asked with a dangerous lilt to his voice. 

“James” you cried again, you knew that was the wrong answer but you needed him to keep going.

Without warning he plunged into you and bottomed out as your eyes rolled back in pleasure. But just as fast as he was in, he had resumed the previous position. 

“Incorrect” he said before pulling completely out. 

You whimpered before he flipped you around so that you were staring at his flushed face; God he was perfect. Looking down between the two of you- his hard cock was completely coated in your combined juices and twitched as he stood over you. 

He grabbed your hips and lined himself up with your aching core once more before shoving himself in with an abrupt snap of his hips. You gripped onto his forearms as you yelped. 

“Who am I” he asked once more, his voice low with lust. 

“D-Daddy” you cried in humiliation as you shied away from James’ watchful eyes. 

He halted his movements and leaned closer to your ear, “Almost. What did you call me earlier, doll?” he said with a devious smirk. 

You took a deep breath and closed your eyes, “...dad”. 

“What was that baby? Didn’t hear ya” James taunted. 

“DAD!” you wailed as you dug your nails into your older man’s forearms. 

“That’s it, Sweetheart” he smiled as he quickened his pace. 

You moaned as his sloppy thrusts jiggled your breasts around for Jame’s viewing pleasure. You felt your high approaching fast. 

“Fuck- I”m close- I” you cried as James continued diving deeper and deeper into your sopping cunt. 

James bit his bottom lip and pulled out as fast as he had been fucking you; leaving you with a disappointingly empty feeling. You gasped at the loss of his massive member and your eyes shot open to see why your boyfriend felt the need to pull out. 

There he was in all of his glory; brow adorned with sweat , face flushed, brows drawn together, and lips parted. Soon you felt his warm ropes of cum spilling onto your stomach, you whimpered at the wasted seed and your lost orgasm. 

He finished stroking himself with a shudder and squeezed out the rest of his spend onto you with a low groan. 

“W-why?” you almost cried as your boyfriend began to clean himself off. 

“Good girls wouldn’t cum from their dad’s dick-” he tossed you a towel from the hanger on the wall, “I hope you’ve learned your lesson, little one”. 

“Once you’ve had time to think about your actions and clean up- maybe I’ll consider letting you cum” he said before leaving you alone and empty in his dim office. 

***

lol I hope you enjoyed :)

[multi-fandoms-posts]

X Men Masterlist:

X Men Masterlist 2

Update: 10/06/24:

Charles Xavier:

His Wife

Imagine

Sweet Moment

The Professor and the Stark Heiress

An Unexpected Encounter

Lesson in Obedience (SMUT)

Charles and His Girlfriend High School AU

A Seductive Chess Game (SMUT)

The Crossing of Worlds last part (X-Men x The Boys)

The Crossing of Worlds Part 3 (X-Men x The Boys)

The Crossing of Worlds Part 2 (X-Men x The Boys)

Beyond Control last Part

The Crossing of Worlds Part 1 (X-Men x The Boys)

Beyond Control Part 1

Hihgschool AU

A Nighttime Disruption

The Power of Thoughts

A Telepathic Connection

Read my mind (Logan x reader x Charles)

Drunk idea

Training

Just Friends huh?

I will always be by your side

Imagine

Charles If....

Update: 10/02/24:

Cherik:

Equal Power, Equal Passion SMUT

Driven to the Limit

Secrets in the Storm

POV Video

Annoying encounter in the bar

Gun and pressure

The Explosive Mission last part

In the Storm of Love and Rage

The Explosive Mission part 2

The Explosive Mission part 1

Logan's sister

Playful Distraction: A Day of Mission and Mischief

Trouble maker

Training Chaos

two men protect her girl

Between Mission and Seduction

Distractions and Dynamics

Seductive Power Part 2

Seductive Power Part 1

Unexpected Revelations last part

Through the Shadows of Danger

Twin Trouble

Unexpected Revelations Part 3

Unexpected Revelations Part 2

Unexpected Revelations Part 1

dirty mind

Horror movie

Cherik

Update: 10/08/24

Erik Lehnsherr:

Erik's Secret

Someday

Imagine

Little surprise SMUT

In His Arms: A Moment of Peace

A Night of Control and Desire (SMUT)

A Challenge, a Kiss, and a Surprise

Between Magnet and Mind

In the Ruins of Conflict

Hidden Tension

Update: 10/06/24

McFassy:

sick days

Chaos Before the Oscars

Waves of Passion

A Magical Moment at Comic-Con

Update: 10/06/24

James Mcavoy:

The Tie SMUT

A Magical Evening

Video call

Surprise at Comic-Con

Sunrise Moments

A Flirt in Focus

Update: 10/06/24

Paddy:

The Thrill of the hunt

Beg for me SMUT

role-playing game (SMUT)

Imagine

Possession and Desire

The Night of Deception and Passion 2/2(SMUT)

The Night of Deception and Passion 1/2

Control and Surrender (SMUT)

The Game of Control (Paddy and Cal)

I love my psychopath

Shackles of Desire (Paddy and The Killer)

The Heat of the Moment (SMUT)

Update:09/29/24

Lord Asriel:

Lost Time: The Return of Lord Asriel (SMUT)

Amidst the Battle

In the Light of the Morning

Update: 09/10/24:

Logan:

Mission with Temptation

Uninvited Guest

Unexpected Visitor(but somehow not)

Unexpected News

Inappropriate Comments

In the Shadows of Passion

Read my mind (Logan x reader x Charles)

Scott's sister

Game night

Midnight Conversation

The Bar

[moonstruckme]

hi bae, can i pls request reader who’s recovering from eating problems and is gaining a bit of weight and gets insecure with poly marauders but they just find her more attractive cause of it

fighting demons rn

🫶🏻🫶🏻

Hi sweetheart, apologies for the wait! I was hunting your demons with a crossbow. Thanks for requesting <3

cw: implied past disordered eating, body image issues

poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 1.4k words

Your favorite high waisted jeans used to sit just so on your hips, practically hanging off your hip bones. Now, they hug your waist, which you try to reason is where they were always meant to be, but it feels so wrong on your body. Everything about your body feels wrong. You jam your fingers in the waistband, and there’s little give. You’re beginning to wonder if you should even bother with these, when you know you’ll eat and they’ll start to bite into your midsection like a punishment. But they’re your favorite jeans.

James comes through on his way to the bathroom with a careless “Hi, lovie,” and you drop your hands from where they’ve been pinching critically at your waist. 

“Hi,” you echo halfheartedly. 

James pauses, pivoting slightly to give you a curious look. You have an out here, you know. You could fake a smile or feign confusion, and he’d let it go. Perhaps he’d be keeping a closer eye on you today, but James will never push the issue if you don’t feel like talking. 

Maybe it’s the option that makes you think it might be nice to externalize. 

“I’ve gained weight,” you say plainly. There. 

James’ eyebrows shoot up, more surprised at the abruptness of your complaint than the complaint itself. “Well, I should hope so. You’ve been doing really well lately.” 

“It’s just,” you sigh, “my jeans don’t fit.” 

He gives you a quick look-over, then an odd sort of smile. “They look great to me. Do they not feel right?” 

You feel your mouth quirk to the side. A dissatisfied pinch. “They used to feel different.” 

“That’s alright, sweetheart,” he says, going into the bathroom. You hear the satisfying schwick of his deodorant cap sliding off. “Do they still sell those same ones?”

You give a tentative nod as he emerges from the bathroom again, and he shrugs at you, a funny scrunch at the bridge of his nose. 

“Then get them in a bigger size.” 

Not what you want to hear. Not necessarily his fault, either. James doesn’t get it. How could he? The only time James’ body doesn’t look like it was drawn into a superhero comic is the few weeks of off-season where he doesn’t train as hard and gets a bit of pudge around his middle. And even then, it’s a very lovable pudge. James Potter wouldn’t know insecurity if it slept in his bed every night. (Which it does. You do.) 

“That’s not the point,” you say, and despite your best intentions your voice comes out with a petulant edge. “I just—I liked how these ones looked on me before. Don’t you think I look…different?” 

The scrunch migrates from the bridge of his nose to just above it, an unhappy notch between his brows. “Well, yeah. But I mean, I like it.” 

You give him a deadpan look. 

“I’m being honest.” James holds up his hands. “Really, sweetheart, I didn’t want to—I know talking about your body can be an issue for you, so I didn’t want to bring it up, but you’ve been looking fantastic lately.” 

You’re quiet, stuck. You aren’t sure what you’d wanted out of this anymore (validation, maybe?) but you’re not going to get it this way. You only feel bad for putting James in this position. He’s your boyfriend and a good one, he only ever had one way out of this. 

“Sorry,” you say, wrapping your arms around your torso, “I didn’t mean to fish for compliments.” 

“Hey.” He steps into your space, hooking his fingers through your belt loops to turn you towards him. “You’re not asking for anything I don’t want to give. You look amazing, I mean it.” Your eyes fall to his chest and he stoops to follow them, dark brows rising incredulously. “What, you don’t believe me?” 

You sigh. “I’m sorry I brought it up, okay? Can we not—”

“Nope.” James lets go of one of your belt loops but keeps a firm hold on the other. “Sorry, no longer an option.” He begins tugging you out of the room. Your hips follow disloyally, and though you wrap your hands around his wrist, he holds fast. 

“James, come on.” You give a little resistance, but he drags you doggedly onward. You could tear away if you commit to it, but these really are your favorite jeans and James is just as likely to take your belt loop with him. 

In the living room, Sirius is mending a pair of James’ trousers while Remus does the crossword, which involves him reading the clues aloud and Sirius firing off unrelated and too-long words until Remus gets it himself. Remus hears your protest first, brows rising as James brings you into the room. 

“What’s going on?” he asks, somewhat warily. 

“She doesn’t believe me when I tell her she’s lovely,” James says, like Can you believe it? Remus blinks and Sirius’ eyes flit up from his work, one brow quirking.

“That’s not what I said,” you defend. 

He releases you, and you step away, crossing your arms over your midsection. “Go on, then.” James sounds truly encouraging, though dubious. “Tell us how lovely you are, angel.” 

You roll your eyes. It’s difficult not to feel frivolous when they put you on the spot like this. “I was only saying that I don’t like the fit of my jeans now.” 

If you hadn’t had Sirius’ full attention already, you do now. He sets down James’ trousers, beckoning you forward, “C’mere, let’s see.” 

You go to stand between his legs, dread coiled like a snake around your ribcage that only squeezes tighter at the unflinching intensity of Sirius’ gaze while he analyzes your face. 

You look down to escape it, sticking your thumb into the waistband of your jeans. “Look, they’ve gotten small—”

“I can see for myself,” he says softly, moving your hand out of the way and replacing your thumb with his own slender fingers. They’re cool against your abdomen. He slides them around to the side of your waist, tugging experimentally at the denim. “Gorgeous, these fit great. This is exactly where you’d usually want them to be. What’s the issue?” 

“It’s just—they don’t—” You feel more and more ridiculous by the second, and you can’t figure out if you’re frustrated with yourself or with them for that. “They used to sit lower, and now I—I just feel like I look weird.”  

“That’s what I’m trying to tell you,” James insists, seating himself on the coffee table and setting his elbows on his knees. Sirius nudges your ankle with his foot, silent encouragement to sit between him and Remus. You comply. “You don’t look weird, sweetheart, you’re—listen, you’ve always been beautiful, but lately, it’s like—you’re just, you’re stunning.” 

You shrink from the compliment, face humiliatingly warm. “Thanks, Jamie, but you have to say that.” 

“No, he’s right,” Remus chimes in. He sounds so matter-of-fact, as if he’s simply recounting how traffic was on the way home from work today. “You don’t look the same as you did before, true, but it’s not a bad change. You’re just not used to seeing yourself healthy, is all.” 

“Exactly.” James throws up his palms, relieved. 

You consider this. It was warped perspective that had gotten you into this mess. Maybe you’re still not seeing things clearly quite yet. 

Sirius wraps a hand around the inside of your thigh, tugging it over one of his. “Babe, if these jeans are evidence of anything, it’s that you’re finally growing into the size you were always supposed to be. If you eventually have to get a larger pair, then fine. It still won’t mean anything about you. You’re exactly right, understand?” 

You nod, feeling thoroughly chastened, and Sirius grins. His fingertips dig into your thigh as he leans over to kiss your cheek. 

“Honestly, I don’t know how you can’t see it,” James says, looking pleased to have some validation from the other boys. “You’re radiant, lovie, your skin is glowing, you look happier—really, you’ve never been more lovely.” 

“It helps that we know you’re doing better, too,” Remus says, a bit quieter. “Frailty doesn’t suit you, dove. It’s…I love you no matter what, but it does make it easier when you’re kind to yourself. Feels more like we’re on the same team.” 

“Thanks,” you say softly, then once more for good measure. “Thanks, guys.” 

“Told you already,” James says, “you’re not asking for anything we don’t want to give.” 

“You liked it when these jeans fit a bit saggier, showed more skin, yeah?” Sirius asks. You nod with a shrug. It doesn’t feel quite so important now. “We can do that. We’ll get you the same ones, if you want, or another pair that might sit a bit more on your hips.” He gives your thigh a squeeze through your jeans. “Gotta show off this bod, right, babydoll?”