#where did i say i was a pro?

[echos-muses]

That's the worst edit I have seen in all Facebook and shitty tumblr memes combined

congratulations on taking time out of your day to anonymously insult a stranger on the internet, coward.

have the day you deserve. don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

[lilithofpenandbook]

Sometimes Severus comes up to Minerva. Right up behind her when she's busy. He'll stand there for a good minute as she works on marking assignments and cursing the boy's youthful energy and brilliant eyes- both of which directly responsible for his finishing his work in half the time it takes her.

"What is it, Severus?" Minerva sighs. Might as well get the obligatory nonsense over and done with, she was due a dose of Severus's antics by now (Merlin forbid he go more than three days without bothering her with nonsensical questions or infuriating wit).

"Am I ugly, Minerva?" he asked. Never there was a being with such innocence in their voice.

Minerva took a moment to take in a breath and silently call on all her patience and all her strength. "Yes, very." Her tone was blunter than the knives used to decorate at Halloween- an incident with some particularly idiotic third years had them ban anything sharper than the corners of a book during the Halloween celebrations.

Severus gasped as if stabbed. "What? Minerva, I thought we were friends!"

Minerva snorted. "Any time we interact, it's completely against my will."

"Minerva! you lie so shamelessly it shocks me." Severus made as if to swoon, a hand clutching the right of his chest.

"You must be shocked; your heart isn't where it should be."

Honestly, Minerva had to admire the fact that the insolent little kitten did not falter in his dramatics with her pointing out the key flaw in his act. If anything, he seemed to be encouraged.

"Ay! The pain of the shock, it has spread throughout my chest! Ah, I cannot breathe!" Severus swayed on his feet, leaning against the chair that Minerva was sitting in. "Oh, how your lie shocks me!"

"Well, then, you had better tell me what exactly I lied about," Minerva said briskly, "before you gasp all the air out of your skinny little lungs, laddie."

"You said," the boy said, a sudden glint in his eye and none of the apparent weakness, standing to face her and one of those long, delicate fingers pointed straight at her, "you said, that our interactions are without your will."

"That is no lie, what part of this looks like it's my will?" Minerva replied, knowing full well she wasn't going to appreciate the cheeky answer Severus had prepared for her.

"Why, the part where you remain for my company, mother," Severus replied, his voice light. "Surely, if you didn't want this, you would have, in your infinite wisdom, simply have employed your great power and assumed your famous feline form and just walked away from me."

Minerva fought her smile. His cheek was infuriating while his logic impeccable. "Perhaps I am simply conversing my energy, you arrogant wee rascal."

"You? Too lazy to avoid a nuisance?" Severus scoffed. "Minerva, you wound me. Don't you know how I know you? You've done much more to avoid the mildest of annoyances, do you truly think I believe that you are here against your will merely to converse your energy?"

Minerva let him see the flicker of a smile disgusted as a smirk, letting the bothersome raven have a little treat for his cleverness, hinting to him that he had essentially won this particular argument. "At my age you no longer have the patience to waste on annoyances. You learn to value your peace. You will understand that some day, I hope, little one."

"And if I die, my hair still black and my skin still smooth?"

Merlin, did the child have a turn towards the morbid. Minerva ignored the voice in her that told her that this would have been a retort of her own had she been in a similar conversation.

"Then you'll die a fool."

"A fool, perhaps, but my funeral will be the biggest," he replied, moving to sit on her desk and grabbing the biscuit jar. Minerva intercepted, lifting it from his grip and replacing it with a towel. His protests died in his confusion at the towel, and Minerva huffed and began to wipe his hands as if he was a child. She did not trust him to correctly clean his hands after handling goodness knows what when experimenting with his potions and she didn't care if he knew it.

"Aye, and how did you figure that?" she asked.

"Surely if I die young, I shall be the first. Therefore you all will be part of the funeral-"

"What makes you think I would want to attend your funeral, you little rascal?" She let go of his hands, almost satisfied that they weren't contaminated.

Severus ignored her and instead took a biscuit from the jar. "You will all be there, therefore I will have the biggest funeral. If I die old, you all shall be gone, so my funeral will be the smallest."

Minerva tried not to think of how depressing that sounded, how lonely it seemed. For a brief moment she felt guilty for being so old and he so young. She involuntarily could see him in her mind's eye, going through their funerals until he stood alone. She and the others- Rolanda, Pomona, Poppy, even Fillus and Hagrid- they were all of an age, weren't they? They could expect their lives to reach the end around the same time, surely? Severus was but a child next to them, he'd stand alone one day.

Minerva tried to ignore the ache in her chest at the thought of him standing alone. Merlin, no. He was far too young. No.

"You truly are besotted with the morbid and the miserable, you melanchonic masochist," she said, her tone just a trifle too sharp to be a simple retort.

Severus paused, swallowing the biscuit. Then he answered. "Ah, but the morbid is much more fascinating, the forbidden has a certain thrill, dear mother." His voice was a little softer, and his fingers, slightly coated in crumbs, were gentle when he tapped her forehead. He was sorry he upset her.

"You and your thrills," Minerva scolded, "yet you cannot even eat a biscuit without making a mess of yourself." Yet even as she spoke, the hand that she used to swipe the crumbs away, was gentle, almost tender, in its movement. She had quite forgiven him.

How could she remain angry? At this boy who looked at her with a scowl of indignation yet whose deep, dark eyes twinkled with mischief and cleverness and brilliance, who stood taller than her, yes, yet was far more delicate in his build than she had ever been, whose hair was as dark as hers had been in her youth, carelessly falling across his forehead. No, she could not remain angry.

If only he had been in Gryffindor, perhaps then she would have noticed him sooner. Or rather, if only her eyes didn't only open for her Gryffindors. How this boy could ever look at her without resentment and anger, she didn't know. Then again, he had been so incredibly isolated and lonely, was it any wonder he let go of his rightful grudges and instead accepted her friendship?

Minerva blinked as if soot from the fireplace got in her eyes. She didn't want him to notice the tears that almost inevitably formed whenever she thought about him. Who would have thought that she'd cry so much for the little devil?

"I'll leave you to your work, dear mother," Severus said cheerfully, hopping off her desk.

"Aye, after you've cleared out my biscuit jar, you villain" Minerva grumbled, looking into the empty jar. Severus shrugged.

"You ought to see it as a compliment towards your taste, really," Severus said. "But I see I have taken the last of your patience"- for indeed, Minerva looked ready to strangle him- "so I shall take my leave. Good night, my good Headmistress, and may you have peace in the silver embrace of the moon!"

And with a laughing twinkle in his eye and a boyish bow, Severus Snape left the room.

Minerva sighed. She wasn't sure if it was out of relief, or because she may have felt some sorrow at his departure.

The door opened again, and a rather meek Severus poked his head in.

"Er, Minerva?" he asked.

"Yes, Severus?"

"Er." Severus stepped in, looking away from her, walking with the awkward gait of a newborn foal, and the nervousness of a deer. "Er, Minerva?"

"Yes, Severus?"

"Am I really ugly, mother?" His voice was a whisper. His raven hair curtained his face, hiding his shame at asking such a pathetic question, and his fingers picked at one of the cuticles of a nail.

Minerva smiled, and walked to him. Softly she brushed the boy's hair out of his face and gently tucked it behind his ear.

"Only as long as you let yourself believe it, dear heart."

[reineydraws]

i have this fic series i'm still working on where mihawk sort of becomes rayleigh's kid and spends ages 11-17ish on the oro jackson.

shanks and buggy imprint on him (bugs considers him a sort of older brother figure/sparring inspiration and shanks has a crush that eventually turns into full-blown love) and this is how i imagine they're like on the day mihawk sets off on his own haha.

[ahsoka-in-a-hood]

I'm always a bit surprised when I see hate for Shaak Ti based on her "Republic property" line like it's some kind of slam dunk statement of her views... have you guys seriously never had to speak someone else's language before? I'm not even trying to comment on her motives or beliefs here- but whether you read her as advocating for Fives or not, if she was 100% unambiguously advocating for Fives there that would still have been the right thing to say to the Kaminoans to get custody of him.

[star-trek-dumb-comics]

Ok so I finally watched Prodigy ! And it was surprisingly good. This is obviously a kids' show but I ended up being pretty invested in the story. The main character started as Ezra Bridger-ass annoying but he's grown on me. Genuinely I think this might be the best new trek show with Lower Decks lmao. It even got me caring about what happens to CHAKOTAY of all things !

Also it had GREAT alien rep omfg there were so few humans I LOVE THIS SHIT !!! especially UFP founding members rep ahhhhh !!!!!!!!!! I've been wanting this for YEARS they did it for me

[tswwwit]

i have a counter argument to the 'only one person can boop bill' thing, mabel. she's the type of person to slap stickers on people, she would definitely be the type to also boop others occasionally and bill would be no exception. she probably doesn't do it to annoy bill like dipper would, but maybe as a form of a friendly gesture, kind of like those people who will lightly punch friends in the arm when they hang out.

You know what? Good point. Mabel would get away with more than most, as a fun-loving lady! Bill understands those impulses, and being a touchy person! He indulges in similar ones himself.

Though when Bill's not in the mood to be playful and gets booped anyway? The 'sister-in-law' status grants her considerable grace.

[taehyungfirst]

https://x.com/jjkofvante/status/1815064843038122327

If it ain't selected activism by the fandom

Some reactions I am seeing, I’m sorry to say this, are a bit performative. Running smear campaigns is not educating someone, taking a firmer stance is good but cursing someone, saying he’s “causing” suffering, that’s not it. Specially when you consider that the reactions they had before for things that are objectively worse, weren’t so loud.

[tuituipupu]

the sausage thyrsus 🌭 picture by omppupiiras

dionysus/bacchus 🍷🎉🌭

[front-facing-pokemon]

[skeletalheartattack]

[lord-squiggletits]

Part of why I hate this fandom's take on Autobots vs Decepticons is ppl (mainly 'con fans honestly) who can't have any nuance of the situation whatsoever and love to write plots like "oh the humans are racist and abusive towards Cybertronians so this is how Megatron is right" no actually I don't think colonialism/imperialism and racism are justified so long as you can point the finger and say "they were the aggressors first" or "their hands are no cleaner than ours bc their society sucks too" sorry. Please come up with better sociopolitical narratives in your war story.

[mishy-mashy]

On the note of Banjo, it makes more sense if he were a Vigilante. I believe he actually was this, rather than a Pro Hero.

Daigoro Banjo, AKA Lariat. It's not explicitly stated he was a Pro Hero, and he recognizes Japan during the first appearances of Abilities.

In the anime (ep 133), the subs translated this as:

"This devastation... it's like we've gone back in time... Trying not to catch the eyes of villains, just hiding every day... it's like when superpowers first appeared."

Banjo recognizes Japan's disarray, and from brief flashbacks of the vestiges, including All Might talking about his dream for a symbol, we can see Japan really was as Banjo recognizes.

But Tomura, in the mall, says people just smile without concern. They've forgotten, or never experienced, that past. Banjo can clearly identify it, and when we get his full name, he definitely lived during that turmoil (neverminding his age, I think of him as 36 or somethin, and Shinomori died at 40).

This would actually make Banjo a Vigilante. They mention that back then, Vigilantes and the first Villains used codenames like comic books, so Banjo being Lariat could easily just be that.

(Not so related, but references to recognizable things like Pokémon and superheroes like Spider-Man appealed to the masses as familiar, so when Abilities first showed up, it would've been around our time [2000s].)

Look at when the League of Villains asked Toga why she had no villain name;

When we see Banjo using his Ability and we get his name, we see that Japan isn't in the best state. Look at all the damage and fresh smoke below him.

All Might says that during this time, All For One's power ran unchecked, and he stole many powerful Abilities, if not crushed the users. Other than simply being first/second-generation, this also explains why, individually, all the OFA vestiges had weak Quirks. Even Kudo's was weak. It's just that it evolved with One For All and had enough nuance to become something more. Abilities like Float and Danger Sense didn't change at all, and Smokescreen only increased the amount of smoke Midoriya could make.

Since Banjo lived in the same time as when Quirks had started appearing, he knows the turmoil, but also was around long enough to be a Vigilante. Pro Heroes hadn't come into play immediately; Vigilantes were where they started.

Even Gran Torino was a Vigilante. It's why Midoriya found nothing on him when he looked him up. Gran Torino only became a Pro Hero to get his teaching license so he could teach All Might for a year, but that didn't stop him from being a hero, per se—he just did it through vigilantism. Gran Torino still did hero stuff before the hero license, and we see him flying and talking with Nana in a costume before he ever taught All Might.

Banjo doesn't strike me as a guy willing to jump through all the hoops when he can just go out and do it himself anyway. And with Japan in chaos still, does he – or the officials – have time for that?

Bakugo even describes Banjo as a nobody, because he doesn't recognize him. This would make sense when remembering Gran Torino was also unknown; because they were Vigilantes. I don't think Bakugo is referring to not knowing them just because their Abilities are weak. Heroes back then would be well-known as retro (ex. Crimson Riot, who Midnight recognizes immediately, despite his not-so-strong hair-hardening Ability), even if they weren't powerful.

Blackwhip is a useful Ability, and back in Banjo's time, considering Abilities in the first generations included Smokescreen, Danger Sense, Float, and Air Jet, Blackwhip is actually higher up in power and usefulness. And he's still unrecognizable.

If he were a Pro Hero, he'd be considered pretty amazing. But he's unknown, has a codename, and acted as a hero when Japan was troubled; his being "nobody" makes sense as a Vigilante.

Heroes didn't happen immediately. They began as Vigilantes; so for Banjo, at the start of using Abilities to bring some sort of order, he would've been in the Vigilante age. Or where heroes are just starting.

Nana was a Pro Hero. Kotaro resents heroes because she was one. Her friend, Gran Torino, was not a Pro Hero until he had to teach All Might for a year. People were more likely to be Vigilantes than Pro Heroes at their time, just because Vigilantes are where they started first.

Being a hero meant courses and licenses, and in a time where Pro Heroes were barely existing, with people still using their Abilities as they pleased? Banjo was probably a Vigilante.

Look at how America handled Vigilantes and starting the Pro Hero business;

Out of 189 Vigilantes, only 7 were recognized as heroes.

America wanted to make a divide between how people should use their Abilities for good. That's why so little people got to be heroes; Vigilantes were too destructive, and that wasn't proper behavior for those protecting the peace. We even see that UA teaches to keep damage to a minimum.

And whoop-dee-doo, look at how Banjo uses his Quirk.

HE'S DESTROYING STUFF. JUST TO GET AROUND. NO NO NO.

He was never actually called a Pro Hero. It was assumed because he has a codename; and codenames were just customary back then, to make identification and classification easier between Vigilantes and Villains while hiding their real identities.

He wouldn't have made the cut as a Pro Hero, lived during a time of rising Vigilantes against society's chaos, wasn't known at all (typical of Vigilantes) despite his good Ability, but had a codename (Lariat), and lived at the same time as Nana and Gran Torino.

So yeah, I consider Banjo to be a Vigilante rather than a Pro Hero. There's more things that push him toward being a Vigilante, compared to just having the alias Lariat being why he's called a Pro Hero by the fandom.

[petricorah]

[molagboop]

So I put the power of friendship and impractical outfits into Metroid Dread. No suits, no shields: we die in a giant laser hand cannon fight like true warriors.

[autistic-katara]

scrolling the open atla tag nd stumbling across the weird takes i was not subjected to when scrolling only the zukka tag

[imthursdaysyme]

If I said Luchador Steve harrignton,,