#the way he holding the sausage stick looks so holy i just

[tuituipupu]

the sausage thyrsus 🌭 picture by omppupiiras

dionysus/bacchus 🍷🎉🌭

[justaphangirl07]

Can you do a Ethan Payne imagine where y/n and Ethan are telling the boys and their gfs their having a baby one by one and then maybe a part two can be having the baby and the boys netting them and Ethan and y/n asking Harry to be the godfather since their so close

A/N: Sure I can give it a go! I hope you like it!

One By One (Ethan Payne/Behzinga)

Y/N's POV

Me and Harry sigh as we throw ourselves down on the sofa

We have had a busy week

It's been just over a month since me and Ethan found out that I am pregnant!

We couldn't be more happy

The baby wasn't planned but of course we are still happy

So as I am likely to be showing my bump soon, we thought that we should tell all our friends

But not just tell them to their faces, we decided to have a little bit of fun with it

And this is how it went:

Telling Simon and Talia:

We decided to take our little sausage dog with us to Simon and Talia's new house so they could meet Rolo and so could Mushu

As the dogs are running around and we are chatting, Talia notices that Rolo is wearing a jumper

"Awww Y/N, he looks so cute in a jumper! We should get Mushu one!" She says directing the comment to Simon, who sighs

"Mushu has a permanent jumper, he doesn't need an extra one" He says with a laugh

"What does it say on it?" She mumbles to herself as she lifts Rolo up

There is silence for a moment before we hear

"Holy shit!"

I look towards Talia, who is looking at me in disbelief

Simon moves closer to her to have a look

"My humans are getting me a human" He reads allowed

"No fucking way! Congrats man!" He says as he gets up and bro hugs Ethan

"Y/N! Oh my god!" She exclaims before moving over to me and hugging me

Safe to say that they are happy

Telling Freya and Josh:

Since it is around halloween time, we decided that we would have a couples pumpkin carving competition and see who could come up with the best designs

Freya and Josh came to our place, so we carved ours at the island and they did it at the dinning table

"Right we are sticking to the idea right?" I mumble to Ethan

"Yes stick to the design that we came up with before" He agrees

"Are you ready yet? We have been waiting to start for agesssss!" Freya groans elogating the s

We laugh

"Yes we are ready!" Ethan says

We count down from 3 and start carving on the word go

We have a range of pumpkins in different sizes and colours

So we decided to carve a heart out of one pumpkin and put a coloured one inside the one that has the heart cut out of it

I write Mummy above the heart cut out

Ethan writes daddy on the other pumpkin

On the heart, I write "Baby due" and then the due date

It isn't long before we are all finished and decided to reveal them at the same time

We stand with our backs to each other in front of the pumpkins and we arrange to turn around and reveal at the same time

"3...2...1!" We all exclaim before turning around at the same time

As soon as they turn around their eyes meet our pumpkins and realisation sets in

Suddenly Freya lets out a squeal, whilst Josh bro hugs Ethan

With the excitement, the pumpkins get forgotten about

But lets just say, I think we won that competition

Telling Vik and Ellie:

Me and Ethan also recently moved into a new house

So we decided that another way to tell people would be to have three sets of converse by the door as you walk in

One big pair, one medium pair and one tiny pair

We would get people to notice them by asking them to take their shoes off at the door when they come in

We decided to invite Ellie and Vik round for dinner, as part of the plan to tell them about the baby

I open the front door when I hear knocking to reveal the couple

"Come in! If it is ok would you be able to take your shoes off and leave them by the door" I request and both agree happily

As they walk in, I slowly begin to walk down the hallway to where Ethan is standing at the end of the hall

It's quiet for a moment before I hear

"Oh my god!"

I turn around to see Ellie holding the small pair of converse

"Are you pregnant Y/N?" Vik asks

I nod with a wide smile on my face

Vik comes up to me and hugs me tightly, whilst Ellie goes running up to Ethan and hugs him

"I'm so happy for you both!" I hear her tell him

I smile as I hug Vik back

I'm so glad they are all supportive

Telling JJ:

As we all know that JJ has been busy with boxing and what not and by this time, we are running out of ideas on how to tell the guys that we are having a baby

And with growing a baby inside me, I am slowly getting fed up trying to think of these ideas

So our idea for telling JJ was to get a picture of mine and Ethan's cars together and putting a small model car in front of them

We edited out the number plates and wrote "Arriving" on one and the due date on the other

Ethan sent this to JJ with nothing else

It took around an hour for him to reply after reading the message

He sent back "Holy shit?! Is Y/N pregnant?"

We decided to FaceTime him and say "surprise!"

JJ proceeded to scream before congratulating both of us and asking loads of questions, some of which we couldn't answer like

"Can the baby hear when you have sex?"

Wonders never cease with that man

Telling Tobi:

Ethan is currently at a Sidemen shoot with the boys and we decided to tell Tobi indirectly

Ethan sent me a text saying "he's nearby"

I quickly ring him on Facetime

It rings a few times before the screen lights up with Tobi's face

"Sorry Y/N, Ethan is currently sorting something out on the set, so he told me to answer the phone. Is everything ok?" He asks

I nod

"Yeah, don't worry! Would you be able to tell him that I have a bun in the oven" I explain

Tobi shouts to Ethan that I have a bun in the oven but half way through the sentence he pauses

"Wait, does that mean what I think it does?" he asks

"If by that you mean, am I pregnant? Then yes I am" I say with a chuckle

Tobi laughs

"Ethan come here man!" He exclaims

I see Ethan come in view of the screen and bro hugs with Tobi and they start talking about the baby

I smile as I see the admiration in Ethan's eyes as he talks about the baby

Telling Harry:

We are very close to Harry and we spend a lot of time him

So we decided that we would just sit him down and tell him

Because lets be honest, we don't know what reaction we are going to get from him!

"So what is this all about?" Harry asks as he sits down on the opposite sofa facing us

Me and Ethan came over to Harry's place to tell him

"Well we have some news that we wanted to tell you" I explain before taking a brief pause

"Y/N is pregnant" Ethan blurts out

Harry's eyes go wide

I wait for a weird or offensively funny comment but what I don't expect to hear is:

"Congratulations guys!"

I look at Harry with a raised eyebrow

"Thats it? Nothing else to say?" I ask with a chuckle

He shakes his head

"No! It's not everyday that your best friends are having a baby!" he explains

"I'm happy for you both!" He says

Harry gets up and gives us both a hug, which again I don't expect

We spend the rest of the afternoon hanging out and just chatting about the pregnancy

As well as explaining to Harry, why we aren't naming the baby Harry or Harriet

I'm so glad that everything went with the guys!

I really don't know what I would do without them!

A/N: I am slowly working through the imagine requests but PLEASE REQUEST SOME IMAGINES

Masterlist

[feraltuxedo]

Joint Honours

My new university AU just started posting!

Joint Honours by FeralTuxedo E, 13 chapters. Summary: PhD student Aziraphale is busy enough with his studies at Tadfield University. But at the start of a new semester, his measured routine gets shaken up by the sudden responsibility of teaching, the arrival of an irresistible new house mate, and a mysteriously flirtatious sausage roll.

Excerpt from chapter 1:

By the time Anathema rang the doorbell, Aziraphale had transformed the contents of his fridge drawer into a passable vegetable stir-fry. They piled up their plates and settled at the large table.

‘What did Gabriel want this time?’ she asked between bites.

Aziraphale, only too happy that the subject of Sausage Roll Man had not been picked up again, told her about the Introduction to Jane Austen seminar that had so suddenly been thrust upon him.

‘Oh.’ She looked surprised. ‘That’s great, isn’t it? Right up your street, and you’ll get paid for it. What’s the catch?’

‘The lecturer is, well, she’s a bit scary.’

Aziraphale looked resolutely down at his plate, but Anathema’s raised eyebrows somehow still made it into his field of vision.

‘Aziraphale soon-to-be-Doctor Fell, don’t you think you’re a little old to be intimidated by—’

Her dressing down was interrupted by the opening of the kitchen door and the entrance of a tall man with windswept red hair and the longest legs Aziraphale had ever had the good fortune to behold.

He quite forgot to be embarrassed about his healthy respect for Dr Celeste, and instead stared at the intruder, who stared right back. Warm brown eyes surrounded by high cheekbones and finely arched brows.

He paused in the doorway, lamplight from the corridor flowing around his skinny frame, dressed from head to toe in black. There was a pair of sunglasses hooked into the neckline of his t-shirt and a squashed packet of cigarettes sticking out of the front pocket of his denims. He looked startlingly out of place here, like he belonged on a sandy beach on the Adriatic coast rather than a run-down student kitchen in Oxfordshire.

Good lord, Aziraphale thought, or possibly whispered.

‘Whoops, sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt,’ the stranger said after a moment. ‘Just wanted something from the fridge.’

‘Oh, no, not at all,’ Aziraphale was quick to reply.

Then, to his intense mortification, he jumped up from his chair and ripped open the fridge, like a gentleman holding the door for his lady.

The man frowned.

‘Er, cheers.’

He noticed the cold sausage roll on the counter next to the fridge, raising a questioning eyebrow at it.

‘You can have that,’ Aziraphale stammered, picking up the pastry and thrusting it into the man’s hand. ‘If you want, I mean. I don’t need it.’

The stranger’s mouth pulled into an amused smile, and Aziraphale had the sinking feeling that he was making an awful mess of this.

‘Cheers,’ the man said again, holding the sausage roll between two long fingers as he sauntered over to the door and turned around with one hand on the frame.

He gave Aziraphale a slow, lingering look that took in every part of him, starting with his scuffed charity shop brogues and ending, he was certain, with the depths of his very soul. Aziraphale slammed the fridge shut and folded his arms in an unmistakable gesture of defence.

The stranger’s smile widened, all traces of sarcasm replaced by appreciation.

‘I’m Crowley, by the way. Just moved into 4A, right at the top.’ He pointed the sausage roll at the ceiling. ‘See you around.’

The door closed, the click echoing through the vast, high-ceilinged kitchen. A few seconds later, there was the creaking and groaning of the ancient wooden staircase. Aziraphale exhaled heavily and risked a look at Anathema, who sat at the table, chopsticks frozen in the air halfway to her mouth.

‘Anathema, I swear—’

‘Holy fucking shit. Did you see him? Did you actually look at him?’

‘Lord in heaven, I looked.’ Aziraphale sank back into his chair, glancing up to the ceiling, where Crowley was presumably settling into his new room just across the hall from his own. ‘Bet you regret not moving in here now.’

Anathema snorted.

‘Yeah, right. As if I have a chance, way he was staring at you.’

[juanarc-thethird]

Gag Reflex? What is that?

Ok @generouscomicssmutneck I saw the video and your request. I just want to say, I try my best. I hope you like it.

Ruby: Hey Jaune! Do you want to see me eat this banana in one bite?!

Jaune: I don't think it's safe to do that.

Ruby: *Swallows the whole banana*

Jaune: *Impressed* Oh my god.

Ruby: *She touches his bulge.* Do you want to see it again?~

-----------------

Jaune is enjoying a popsicle while trying to beat the heat.

Weiss: Good afternoon, Jaune.

Jaune: Hi Weiss. What are you doing out in this heat?

Weiss: Atlas has always been cold so I like to enjoy these hot days.

Jaune: I understand you. Do you want a frozen popsicle? I have another one in case you want it.

Weiss: Yes, please.

Weiss sits next to him and grabs the popsicle. She will open the bag and suck it completely. Jaune could only see the popsicle stick on her lips.

Jaune: (Holy shit!)

After a moment she pulls it out of her mouth.

Weiss: It tastes good, but it's missing something.

Jaune: W-What is missing?

Weiss: *puts her hand on his bulge* Some cream~

-----------------

Jaune: Hi Blake, how are you?

Blake has her mouth covered with a surgical mask, and she holds up a finger asking Jaune to give her a second. She takes off her mask, and takes out a very long and wide dildo from her mouth.

Jaune: Holy fuck?! Why do you have that in your mouth?

Blake: To be ready for when I suck you off.

Jaune: Excuse me?!

Blake: You heard me. Now drop your pants~

-----------------

Jaune is enjoying his hot dog.

Yang: Can I take a bite? *She takes the hot dog from his hands*

Jaune: Hey, that's mine!

Jaune watches as Yang eats the entire hot dog in one bite.

Jaune: *quietly* Holy shit (She just swallowed it?)

Yang: Do you have another one? I'm really hungry.

Jaune: That was the only one I had.

Yang: Seriously? And what about this sausage?~ *She grope his package*

Jaune: *blushing* Umm....

Yang: This is really going to fill me up~

-----------------

Jaune is holding 2 chocolate covered bananas.

Jaune: Hey Pyrrha, do you want a Chocobanana?

Pyrrha: Where did you get them from?

Jaune: I made them. Yours is covered with mint chocolate. I know you really liked that chocolate.

Pyrrha: Thank you. What is yours covered with?

Jaune: My is covered in nutella.

Pyrrha: Can I taste it?

Jaune: Sure.

Jaune brings the chocobanana closer to her. Pyrrha opens her mouth and starts taking the whole chocobanana until touching his fingers with her lips. She looks him in the eyes erotically and after a few moments she withdraws and Jaune's chocobanana is gone.

Jaune: *being a blushing mess* W-what?

Pyrrha: Don't worry. I plan to make it up to you.~ *She begin's to unbutton his pants with her semblance*

-----------------

Jaune is carrying a giant plate that holds a huge tower of pancakes, with maple syrup.

Jaune: Nora, your pancakes are ready.

Nora: YES!!! GIVEGIVEGIVE!!

Nora tries to take the plate away from Jaune, but that causes him to accidentally drop the plate.

Jaune: Nora! Look at this mess. You have to calm down.

Nora: Sorry

Jaune: *sigh* Now everything is on the floor.

Nora: *Looks at his hand covered in maple syrup* Not everything~

Jaune: What?

Nora takes Jaune's big hand and brings her lips close to his fingers. She sucks them all the way to the bottom and moans in pleasure. Jaune can feel his fingers reach her throat.

Nora: *Stops* Delicious~ *Looks at his crotch* Looks like this turned you on. If you bring more maple syrup, maybe I can help relieve some stress.~

Jaune: *Blushing* I'll be right back! *He runs to the kitchen*

Nora: *Giggles*

-----------------

Jaune and Bleiss enjoying some intimate time together.

Bleiss: *Rubbing his dick* Fuck, you're so hard~

Jaune: How can I not be when a sexy girl is next to me. Fuck~

Bleiss: I can't wait to get that big dick in my pussy. Wait! Do you want to see a trick of magic?

Jaune: Umm… I think this is not a good time for magic.

Bleiss: Please, you'll love it. I've been practicing it for several weeks.

Jaune: *sigh* Ok, what is the trick?

Bleiss: I made your penis disappear!

Jaune: What? How?

Bleiss: That's the surprise.

Jaune thinks for a momento.

Jaune: Ok, but don't hurt me. I trust you.

Bleiss: Trust me, you'll love it~

She moves until she is inches from his cock. She rubs it so that it remains hard.

Bleiss: Ok, on the count of three. One…. Two… Three!!

Bleiss puts his entire member in her mouth without any problem. Jaune did not expect it and he feels incredible on his cock.

Jaune: OH FUCK!!!~

Bleiss: *Still with his cock in her mouth* Tahd Dahd! (Ta da!)

[4point7]

THWACK - A Negan One Shot

Summary: a load of words slung haphazardly together to create a modern masterpiece. Written for @negans-lucille-tblr​ 6K Roll The Dice Challenge using the prompt “ I'm a slave to your games. I'm just a sucker for pain “.

Characters: Negan x Reader (ft. Floral Wallpaper)

Rating: 18+ but maybe less than 98

Warnings: All the warnings. Don’t read this if you get offended by anything typically Negan. Floral Wallpaper.

Word Count: 1,963 

Tick.

Tick.

Tick.

The sound of the clock echos through your mind. It suffocates your thoughts as it reminds you of the monotonous grind of time. Every "tick" amplified through the dark. The space between each one extending for eternity as the silence between them crashes through you like unrelenting waves on a crumbling cliff face, slowly beating away at your resilience. The rest of the community sleeps blissfully as you lay there, your consciousness unwavering.

Tick.

You roll on to your side and open your eyes, staring blankly at the wall. The floral wallpaper, once pristine, now peels away slightly at the seems, unveiling the illusion of perfection, breaking the once perfect pattern.

The luxuries of the past have long been abandoned. What's the point in keeping the inside looking nice any more? Compared to the horror that lies in the world beyond the mildew covered window of The Sanctuary, the room you're in, even in this state, IS luxury these days. You only need to see a couple of Walkers have their heads smashed in to be cleansed of material desires and become satisfied with basic needs being met.

Another tick of the clock calls an end to the time you're willing to designate to falling asleep. You sit up and swing your legs over the side of the bed, exposing them to the chill of the air that your bed sheets were protecting you from.

You feel the layer of dust and dirt on the soles of your feet as they connect with the cold floor. You reach to grab your clothes from the chair next to the bed and pull them on, taking the time to dust the debris from your feet before donning your boots.

You open the door, trying to muffle it's creak by pulling it softly and slowly away from the latch before stepping out into the hallway. You would rather not wake anyone. People would get suspicious if they saw someone walking The Sanctuary grounds in the early hours of the morning.

You make your way along the corridor to the door that leads outside and gently push it open. The cool breeze from outside washes over you, almost through you, as it breaks into the corridor. You take a deep breath, feeling the air fill your lungs, calming you, if just for a moment.

The door comes to a stop with a soft thud, fully revealing the early morning landscape. The trees and buildings in the distance consumed by a mist that spills onto the roads towards you.

As you step out, gravel crunching underfoot, a glint catches your eye. You follow it to its origin, finally laying your eyes on the steel barb wire coiled tightly around a baseball bat, like a snake wrapped tightly around a branch. It's doing no harm where it is but anger it and it will bite! Lucille, resting by the man himself, Negan.

You wonder if you can back away, sink back into the darkness of the doorway but it's too late, even though he isn't facing you, you know he knows you're there.

He stands, leaning on a barrier, his folded arms resting along it supporting the weight of his upper body, leather jacket taught across is broad back. Lucille stands propped against the barrier beside him, perfectly inanimate yet still so menacing. It's like the bat had a presence all of it's own, bringing fear to many while being nothing more than a prop to the horrors of it's master.

You have wanted to be this close to Negan for such a long time but now, in his presence, you freeze. Just standing there taking him in, feeling your heart thump harder in your chest, adrenaline surging through you.

"You just gonna stand there pissin' your pants or are you gonna join me?" His deep voice startles you for a moment, you weren't expecting him to speak. You walk over and lean on the barrier next to him, staring out into the mist.

You sense him turn to look at you but you don't dare look back. Not yet.

"So... who are you?" He says in a gentle deep drawl.

"I am Negan", you respond, now turning your head to look him, traces of a smirk lining your lips.

He chuckles and looks back to the landscape. "Holy shit balls, we got ourselves a joker!"

You don't take your eyes from him, taking in his profile. It's not until you're up-close like this that you can see his imperfections, the lines starting to creep across his skin, breaking the perfect appearance, reminding you of that floral wallpaper.

"What the fuck are you doing awake at this time, Comedian?"

"Can't sleep", you respond.

"Huh. No fuckin' shit!" He pauses for a beat and you say nothing. "Me either."

"Why?" You pry and he lets out a sigh.

"Could you fuckin' sleep if you had to do the shit that I do? Smashin' dead fuckers' heads don't make my prick hard, Joker! Smashin' livin' fuckers', even less so but some fuck's got to protect and lead this community. They haunt me. Every one of the cunts marchin', around my fuckin' thoughts like they're on parade. That's why."

It's an honesty you weren't expecting from him. You had always been sold this fearless, unfazed persona yet here before you stood a man troubled by the actions of his past. Almost broken. For a moment you let yourself pity him.

"Does nothing ever help distract your mind? Help you sleep?" You ask.

"Fuckin' my wives! At least, it used to. But knowing their just fuckin' me out of fear has started to take the shine off the pussy, if you know what I mean? Shit! I wanna slip my cock down the throat of a fucker who wants it, not just because they feel obliged. Then I might have the release I need". His hand slips down and gently caresses the handle of Lucille as if unconsciously.

You're so close to getting what you have wanted for a long time and you know you can get it if you play your cards right.

"WANT ME TO GIVE THE OLD CODGER A DAVID BLOWIE?", you exclaim.

"Oooh err, yes please, if that's okay with you, like? If you like don't mind and stuff and that?" He says back in a melancholy tone not far from how a school boy might ask for his ball back when he kicked it into his neighbours garden.

"You want to?"

"WANT TO? I'D FUCKING LOVE TO!" you whisper. "GIMME THAT WONDER WURST!"

You drop to your knees. Ouch! You think. You should have gotten down gently. Why the fuck you decided to drop so hard no one fucking knows.

You undo his pants revealing his big, flaccid whopper. "It's flaccid." You say. "Yes" he replies.

You stick out your tongue and touch the head of his penis with it as though your testing an ice lolly to see how cold it is. THWACK! His instant erection ploughs into your chin, essentially upper cutting you, and knocks you over. His meat looks like a big fat sausage that's about to explode. You get back to your knees and take his shaft in your hand. "Hey ho, here we go, yo!", you sing into his flesh stick like it's a microphone, before... boom! You slam that happy package right on down your gob hole! Your head smacking back and forth like your headbanging to a heavy metal track. Your throat is making noises like a fucking plunger making hard work out of a toilet or some shit. Like gluh, ung, gug, guh, glug, guh, guh, guh, gug, gluh, ug, ugh, glug... ... guh, gluh, uh, ugh. You had to stop in the middle there to take a little breath. You are human after all.

Anyway your smashing his trouser snake and shit and he fucking loves it and all that and he is like "yeah, yeah, ooh, fuckin' yeah" and shit. Drool is all puddling on the floor beneath you and all that and like splashing all over the place, you know. Like, step off Shamoo, people need to be careful of MY splash zone! And you like grab the shaft in one hand and the balls in the other and stuff and your like working it like that. Your tongue giving it the biggun on his nut balls. Like slip, slop, lollipop mother fucker. Better tongue action than a fucking ant eater. You pushing your tongue down his urethra and give a good old lick all up in there. Then you start slurping on that junk like a fucking kid trying to get the last of their slushy. And his eyes are popping out his head and shit and he's like "Holy shit balls, joker this is a damn acceptable level blow jay." And you like slap it on your forehead and shit and like maybe prod yourself in the eye with it a bit, I dunno. And you like slap it and he looks at you like "uh okay, I s’pose" and then you slap it again because fuck it. And back in the face opening it goes. Plunger noise returns. And he maybe grabs your hair or maybe not, maybe if you're into that and you're not but maybe you are. And he is all like, "I'm going to do a cum" and you're like "pardon?" And he's like "I'm going to do a cum" and you're like, "sorry what?" And he's like "I'm going to..." and you stop sucking and are like, "I'm so sorry, I can't hear you over the racket". He's like, "ever so sorry, I was just letting you know, I was going to do a bit of a cum" and you're like, "Right you are, Sonny Jim" and stick his whoopsie back in your cock pocket of a mouth. Then all of a sudden, without any warning whatsoever, *pew, pew* he does a bit of a cum in your throat making you gag. Then like a fucking fireman's house, white spaff juice sprays out of the end sending you flying backwards as he drenches you with his load. Like DRENCHES you. When he is done, you pull a hanky from your pocket and wipe the corners of your mouth. You have some class after all.

You get to your feet and walk back over to him, a twinkle in your pink eye.

"Thanks Joker, that was okay, I really fuckin' needed that".

You blush slightly and lean in for a kiss. As your faces connect you take his lip in between your teeth and hold it there. You hold it there until you feel it go slack in your grasp, until his eye's glaze over and then you pull out the knife you had plunged into his throat, his blood starting to gush over you. His body goes limp and falls to the floor with a thud. The vibration knocks Lucille from her perch and she falls across his slumped body. You wipe the blood from the knife on your shirt and place it back through your belt, behind your back. You had finally got what you had come for and you didn't care what it took to get it. You didn't fear the walking dead but you did fear what someone might do to you if they found you like this so you decide it best to head off. You step over Negan's lifeless body and start your walk home. After all, people will be waking up soon and it's a long walk back to Alexandria.

... oh yeah! You sing "I'm a slave to your games. I'm just a sucker for pain" as you walk off or something.

[itshardcandy]

Hot ‘n Cold

Kim Namjoon x Reader 

(Written for a writing game by @letsgetitinbusan) 

6059 Words

Genre: Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Smut

Warnings: Consumption of Alcohol, Swearing, Unprotected Sex (Wrap it before you tap it, kids), Outdoor Sex, Vaginal Fingering 

Summary: A camping trip takes an unexpected turn

Preview: 

“You feel much warmer already.”

“Mhh, you are helping a lot with that.”

“I think I noticed. Good to know I can be of assistance. It’s getting quite hot in here, don’t you think?”

Bliss. Overwhelming and all-consuming bliss clouded your mind when you walked out the door of the lecture hall you just took your last exam of the semester in. Making your way through the crowd of students towards the nearest exit you hurried out of the building knowing you wouldn’t have to set foot in that hellhole that dares to call itself a university for the next beautiful, fun-packed, exciting 8 weeks of summer break. On the way back to the dorm, fully immersed in your phone, you suddenly felt a large hand gripping your shoulder. Hurling around, the grinning face of Namjoon, your friend and next-door dorm mate, appeared in your view.

“Guess who got himself full marks on their last project of the year?”

Namjoon exclaimed practically beaming with elation and pride.

“Hmm let me think…  Must have been that dude you hung out with last week, right?”

You said teasingly, pretending to think hard to guess the answer to this, truly very difficult, question considering the genius mind of your friend.

“No, silly, it’s me of course.”

Namjoon rolled his eyes and continued.

“Anyway, how was your exam? Any more luck this time?”

“Ugh, I wish. It was a disaster, my brain feels like it’s been sucked out of my head. I’d be surprised if I actually passed though knowing my prof, I highly doubt it. That man just can’t teach a class for the life of him. It’s an outrage he has the audacity to have us take an exam on that waste of a time his lecture was if you ask me.”

You rambled on frustrated but continued jokingly.

“I might have to borrow that big juicy brain of yours next time so I have an actual chance to succeed.”

“Ready to get wasted at the camp tonight then, I assume?”

“Hell fucking yeah I am.”

Laughing, you both continued down the paved road leading to the big grey building that was your dorm. Dragging yourself up the numerous sets of stairs you asked yourself for the thousandth time why exactly you’d thought picking a room on the 5th floor of a building that has no elevator was a good idea. Well, at least you had the best crackheads you could wish for as neighbours so that was something, you thought to yourself. Over the years you had lived on that floor, you and the others had bonded over your shared struggles of living in that falling-apart building and the uncountable tragedies that unfolded within those walls, including that one hot summer in which the rusty, ancient water pipe burst and thus none of the inhabitants had running water for two weeks straight. Out of that emergency situation a new tradition was born with all of you packing your essentials and riding your bikes down to the shore and going camping every summer during semester break.

“Bet Jungkook hasn’t even started packing?”

Namjoon said and knowing his room mate, you agreed.

“Better help him then, we should leave as soon as possible so we can secure our spot at the campsite. I don’t trust people these days, that spot is getting popular and I’m not taking any chances.”

With a last wave at him you unlocked your door and disappeared into your apartment. Ever since your former room mate and parter in crime had moved out earlier that month you had the flat to yourself and you still weren’t accustomed to having that much space for your stuff. Sadly, your flatmate had moved across the country meaning she couldn’t take part in the camping trip this year.

Scanning your possessions, you skilfully grabbed various items and articles of clothing you’d be needing for the next few days and threw them on the bed. After ticking everything off of your imaginary list, you began packing the pile of things into your backpack.

Not much later and after checking your groupchat to make sure that everybody was ready to go, you left your room and walked down the corridor meaning to knock on the door on the right. It immediately opened and Yoongi appeared in the frame, manoeuvring his belongings into the hallway.

“Good to go?”

You asked to which Yoongi hummed in agreement. You descended down the staircase together carrying your equipment.

“Is Jimin downstairs already?”

You wondered, since Yoongi’s room mate was nowhere in sight.

“Nah, he still got that dance performance with Hoseok this afternoon. They will join us later this evening.”

“Right, right, forgot about that.”

In front of the building Namjoon, Jungkook and Taehyung were already loading their luggage onto their bikes. When everybody was done you set off on your journey revelling in the beautiful feeling of freedom awaiting you at the camping site. After a good hour you turned into the path leading towards the clearing at the beginning of the small forest by the shore. Upon arrival Jungkook immediately spotted the car that was parked right beside the track.

“How does he manage to be here first every time? I swear he does that on purpose just to rear me up.”

Jungkook whined at the sight of his brother.

Pausing the unpacking of his luggage from the trunk of his car, Seokjin greeted you all with a wave and a big smile.

“Great! You made it just in time to help me unload the tents.”

“Speaking of, we need to agree on sleeping arrangements since a certain someone managed to rip theirs last year.”

Yoongi said and all eyes lingered on Namjoon who looked at the ground in shame.

“Let’s see… We got four tents. That means Taehyung and Jimin in their tent and Yoongi and Hoseok will share one, I guess? Then me in my tent and Y/N in hers. Which means Namjoon and Jungkook will have to seek shelter in one each. Any preferences?”

Jin spoke and looked at the two tent-less members of the group.

“I don’t mind sharing the tent with Y/N. Uhh... I mean if she doesn’t mind of course.”

Namjoon said quickly and you couldn’t help but chuckle.

“Fine by me. As long as it’ll still be in one piece by the end of this trip.”

“Great, that’s settled then. Little brother, the honour of sharing a tent with this handsome guy is all yours.”

Jin said exaggeratedly gesturing at his face which Jungkook could only answer with a grimace, seeming a lot less excited about said fact than his brother was.

You busied yourselves to take the tents out of the trunk of the car and searched for the perfect spot to put them up. You walked across the clearing examining the ground thoroughly with Namjoon following behind with your tent under his arm.

“What about here? We’d get some shade from that big oak tree right there and it looks like the ground is as even as it can get.”

You asked and Namjoon agreed.

“Perfect. You really have a good eye for that. Remember the first time we went camping and you and your room mate placed the tent directly above a molehill?”

Namjoon laughed and you snorted at the memory.

“Please don’t remind me, I got the shock of a lifetime when suddenly something tried to make its way in from underneath the tent. Never screamed so loud in my life.”

“I remember you woke us all up thinking you were getting stabbed or something. Scared the shit out of me.”

Namjoon said and started setting the tent up. Since he was very skilled in putting the pieces together, you didn’t have to do much besides holding the poles up for Namjoon to drape the fabric around. After a few minutes the mission was accomplished and you looked pleased at the joint achievement.

“I’m really glad you picked me to share a tent with. Without you I would have been struggling a lot more to get it set up.”

“Well thanks for trusting me enough to let me into your holy cave.”

At that remark you stopped dead in your tracks and burst out laughing then turned to Namjoon with an incredulous look. Namjoon who seemed to have realised just now how much of an innuendo his comment had been covered his eyes with his right hand shaking his head in disbelief.

When the others were done setting up their tents, Taehyung and Jungkook began collecting some wood and stacked it into the fireplace that had been built in the middle of the clearing. The rest of your group took seats on the logs that were placed around the firepit and unpacked the food that you had brought. Jin and Namjoon took it upon themselves to act as masters of the meat and impaled sausages with some thin sticks to roast them over the fire. By the time the first batch was done, Hoseok and Jimin finally arrived and were greeted with shouts. They joined the jolly round busying themselves to some well-deserved dinner.

After you had devoured the sausages Hoseok whipped out a box containing some crackers, a bar of chocolate and a bag of marshmallows out of his backpack.

“Nothing better than some S’Mores when camping, am I right?”

Hoseok asked and handed the box around letting everybody grab some for themselves.

Jin nudged Taehyung in the shoulder who sat on his left and asked him to accompany him to his car. When they made their way back to the rest of the group, they were carrying bottles upon bottles of Soju.

“At the last wedding we catered for, those people ordered way too much alcohol and they refused to keep the leftover bottles so naturally I found a convenient solution to that problem and persuaded my boss to leave the good stuff to me. Not even he can resist my charms I assume.”

Jin told you and overall cheers complimented him.

“Awesome Jin, you working at a restaurant really has its perks.”

You said approvingly and happily accepted the bottle of peach flavoured Soju Taehyung handed you over.

While the supply of Soju slowly shrunk and the pile of empty bottles grew, your mood became more light-hearted over time and you all reminisced in the memories you had made over the years. Slowly but steady the sun set and it got darker. When the glowing red ball of light had finally disappeared completely behind the horizon Jimin and Hoseok declared that they were tired and proceeded to get ready for bed.

“That dance performance really makes itself felt now. Maybe I have to admit that I’m getting older.”

“Don’t worry Hobi, it took a toll on me as well. But at least we know we gave it our all.”

Jimin said and stifled a yawn. The two headed to the cabin at the edge of the clearing that contained a rather humble bathroom but at least it offered a tank of fresh water so that was something.

Gradually one after the other decided to go hit the hay and bid the remaining few people goodnight. When only Namjoon, Jungkook and yourself were left sitting around the fire, the three of you decided to play a drinking game resulting in Jungkook getting so drunk that he had to throw up. Namjoon hurried towards the bathroom in the cabin to get some water while you comforted Jungkook. You grabbed a napkin and wet it with the fresh water Namjoon had brought back and began cleaning around Jungkook’s mouth wiping the nasty residue from his face. Unfortunately, a lot had already dribbled down onto his shirt.

“I think you should get that thing off. We can wash it tomorrow but for now just change into a fresh shirt.”

You said to Jungkook and helped him out of the soiled piece of clothing. Jungkook who couldn’t control the movements of his limbs properly, let his right arm snap back after retreating from the sleeve of his shirt resulting in hitting the container of water Namjoon was still holding. A splash and Namjoon had gotten the majority of water over his chest. Cursing he let the now empty container fall to the ground. Namjoon tried to wipe some of the water off his body but it was useless, he was drenched. You laughed at the sight. It reminded you of a puppy who had just received an unwanted shower.

“We should get you to your tent so you can rest. Do you feel a bit better now?”

You asked Jungkook and he nodded. Namjoon helped you escort Jungkook to the tent he was sharing with Jin and made sure he got in alright, closing the entrance behind him.

Back at the fireplace, Namjoon stood by the flames as near as possible trying to get them to dry his shirt but the fire had already died down significantly so it didn’t really work. Resigning, he lifted the wet fabric above his head and threw it next to himself on the log. You couldn’t help but give him a sneaky glance. You had always thought of Namjoon as really handsome but something about him revealing his wet chest so shamelessly to you hit different.

“Do you wanna stay up or go to sleep as well?”

Namjoon asked and caught you off-guard in the act of looking him up and down, your eyes lingering on his chest a little longer than necessary. Flustered you directed your eyes away and shook your head.

“No, I wanna stay up, I want to enjoy this as much as possible.”

“You talking about my body or the night in general?”

Namjoon joked and you secretly asked yourself the same question. You proceeded to grab one of the last bottles of Soju and took a sip so you had an excuse not to answer.

“Want one as well?”

You asked and seeing him nodding, you handed him one of the bottles. After the first gulp he scrunched his nose looking appalled. Checking the label, he felt his worst suspicions confirmed.

“You gave me one of the flavour-less ones! What do you take me for – an animal? What have I done to you to deserve such torture?”

You laughed feeling not as sorry as you maybe should have as Namjoon looked really funny being so disgusted by his beverage.

“Sorry, I couldn’t see well and just picked the one nearest. Want a different one?”

You took a close look at the three remaining Soju bottles and gave Namjoon an apologetic smile.

“I’m afraid they are all plain as well. Seems like I got lucky and picked the last grape flavoured one.”

“So that’s what I get for trusting you. I feel betrayed.”

“Um do you wanna share mine? I don’t mind, I’ve had enough alcohol anyway.”

You offered your bottle to Namjoon and he didn’t hesitate to take it, chucking his own bottle away. How could he turn down such an offer when it appeared so temptingly? Taking turns emptying the drink, you sat in comfortable silence just listening to the occasional sound of the woodland creatures nearby and gazing up at the night sky. Here in the middle of the forest without all the street lights and neon signs lighting up the night, the stars were clearly visible and shone bright and clear. You loved the night sky, so naturally you were gazing upwards totally lost in the twinkling lights of the millions of stars.

You didn’t notice the lingering eyes of Namjoon who was admiring how the moonlight illuminated your silhouette. When exactly he had caught feelings for you, he wasn’t quite sure. All he knew was that it somehow happened and when he finally came to terms with that, he was already crushing hard and even though there had been the occasional teasing and ambiguous situation he still didn’t think there was more to it than just that. You had been friends for ages so anything beyond that was surely out of the question, right? Therefore, he hadn’t given it much thought but the way you had looked at him when he took off his shirt didn’t go unnoticed and Namjoon couldn’t help but wonder if there was a possibility that he wasn’t the only one who had developed a crush over the years.

“Do you ever wonder why we are here on this earth?”

Namjoon was pulled out of his thoughts by the sudden question. You looked at him and continued your philosophical train of thought.

“I mean look, there are so many stars and planets up there. Why out of all places do we exist on this one? And think about it… The moon and the stars are so far away but we still see them. They are so huge we can actually see them from here. Isn’t that amazing?”

Before Namjoon could answer you rambled on.

“And we are so small. We are so small, Joon, why are we so small? So insignificant? The stars shine so bright even after they had died but we are just dead, just rotting. Why do I even bother accomplishing anything when in the end it means nothing and everyone will forget that I even existed?”

You finished and stared at Namjoon. The sight of you looking so desperate and sad devastated him.

“Y/N… That’s not true and you know it. You are so loved by your family and your friends. You could never be insignificant and of course the people around you will remember you. Please stop thinking so lowly of yourself, I can assure you, you don’t have to worry about that.”

“Th-thank you… I suppose I had to much Soju, I’m sorry you had to witness me spiralling into another existential crisis.”

“Don’t be sorry, that’s what friends are for, right?”

“Yeah… friends.”

You mumbled and looked up at Namjoon. Your eyes met, holding the gaze for a bit longer than expected before Namjoon cleared his throat.

“So, do you wanna go to bed? It’s getting quite late.”

“Hmhm yeah it’s getting colder, as well, now that the fire went out.”

You shivered suddenly at the cold air of the night, missing the warmth the fire had provided. Namjoon stood up and checked the fireplace to make sure it was really gone out so you wouldn’t accidentally set the whole forest on fire while you slept. You collected the remaining bottles that were scattered around the firepit and added them to the already remarkably high pile of bottles you had all emptied together. Finding the way to your tent turned out to be a lot more difficult, now that it was almost pitch black. You stumbled over a root that was sticking out of the ground and could only save yourself from falling by gripping onto Namjoon’s wrist tightly. He swayed back at the sudden weight pulling on his arm but managed to steady himself in time.

“Are you alright?”

Namjoon asked concerned and turned around. You were still holding onto his wrist but had found your balance again. When you let go of his arm Namjoon held his hand out to you.

“Wouldn’t want for you to trip again. Really, why don’t you wear your glasses more often? Couldn’t read the label on the Soju bottle, couldn’t see that big root. Honestly I’m surprised you managed to survive without getting into any serious accidents yet.”

“Come on it’s not that bad. And I hate my glasses, I look stupid wearing them.”

You scoffed. You hated your glasses with a burning passion but were too lazy to go get new ones that you would actually consider wearing.

“You don’t, you look cute with them and not stupid, at all, but if you prefer to stumble through life like a mole squinting at everything then suit yourself, I guess.”

“Thanks, I will. Besides, I wouldn’t want to miss out on the chance of being escorted to my humble sleeping accommodation by my chivalrous saviour now, would I?”

You said cheerfully and took Namjoon’s hand. You continued the short walk towards your tent. When you’d reached it, you opened the zipper and crawled inside and Namjoon followed you straight. Leaving your shoes in front of the entrance you slipped out of your pants. You made yourself comfortable in your sleeping bag while Namjoon rid himself off his jeans and tucked himself into his sleeping bag as well.

“Joon, can you hand me the water bottle? I feel like a raisin, all that Soju dried me out beyond measure.”

Namjoon felt his way through the items popped into one corner until he found the requested bottle.

You took it and quenched your thirst, downing almost half of the bottle in one go.

“Hey, leave me some okay? You’re not the only one who’s thirsty.”

You reluctantly stopped gulping down the water and held the bottle out in the direction of Namjoon. Since it was almost completely dark inside the tent, Namjoon had problems to make out the bottle causing him to hit it with the back of his hand. With a shriek from you the bottle flew out of your hand and landed on your legs, letting the water flow all over your sleeping bag.

“Y/N I’m sorry, I’m so sorry! Did you get wet, is it bad?”

Namjoon apologized and pat his hand over your sleeping bag to see how badly he had fucked up but all you could do was laugh, being already so used to his clumsiness.

“It’s okay, really. But I won’t be able to sleep in that thing, it’s soaked and it’s getting cold tonight.”

“No worries, you can sleep in mine. It’s my fault that yours is wet, after all, so that’s only fair.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, you’ll be freezing.”

“I won’t, I can stand the cold better than you, so just take mine and go to sleep.”

In the end you didn’t want to argue and the thought of sleeping without a cover wasn’t that enticing either, so you just got out of your wet bag and threw it out of the tent. When you wiggled into Namjoon’s sleeping bag which was a lot more spacious than yours and conveniently was already preheated by Namjoon. You felt the overpowering fatigue that set in and quickly slipped into unconsciousness.

After a while, you woke up at the sound of teeth chattering. You turned around only to see Namjoon laying curled up into a ball and shivering.

“S-sorry, did I wake you up?”

“What the fuck do you think you are doing? Do you want to freeze to death?”

“It’s f-fine, don’t worry. Just get back to sleep.”

“Fine my ass. Do I look stupid to you? Come here, your sleeping bag is a lot bigger than mine. We might have to squeeze a bit but I think we can both fit.”

You opened the zipper and shuffled towards Namjoon. When he had squeezed himself in, he tried to close the sleeping bag but it was no use.

“Doesn’t matter, just leave it open. It’s better than nothing isn’t it?”

You said and Namjoon turned around only now realizing just how close you were.

“God, how are you not frozen solid yet, you are ice-cold!”

“Not everyone can be as hot as you.”

You let out a small chuckle and pressed yourself closer to Namjoon’s body, making yourself comfortable as the little spoon.

“Then I’ll try to make you hot, as well, lying beside a fucking block of ice truly is no fun.”

Namjoon thought you had no idea how right you had been about making him hot. While the two of you had occasionally cuddled during movie nights at the dorm, nothing came close to just how close you were now with nothing between you, except for your underwear and your shirt. With you next to him and the added warmth of the sleeping bag around, Namjoon started to defrost and soon he was engulfed in the warm feeling, ready to fall asleep but he was too aware of your body pressed into him. It really wasn’t necessary for you to push your ass that far into his groin, he thought. It was almost as if you were doing that on purpose just to drive him crazy. But maybe he was misinterpreting everything and he would make a fool out of himself.

As if on cue Namjoon felt you move your body just a bit, letting yourself grind into him slightly. Throwing all caution over board he put his arm around your waist pulling you even closer and letting his hand rest on your stomach. You let out a satisfied sigh and proceeded to move yourself against him. The friction had its effects on Namjoon who noticed himself hardening, very aware that you must feel it too since his boxers barely concealed anything. You however, were finally content that your actions bore fruit. You had been sure of the potential that lay in yourself and Namjoon to be more than just friends and you were determined to find out if you were right about that during this camping trip. Sharing a tent was the best opportunity you could have wished for and considering the very noticeable bulge you felt being pressed into your back from behind you had been right with your assumptions.

“You feel much warmer already.”

“Mhh, you are helping a lot with that.”

“I think I noticed. Good to know I can be of assistance. It’s getting quite hot in here, don’t you think?”

You said and took off your shirt to throw it to your feet. You then turned over now facing Namjoon. He was taken aback by this sudden change and could feel your breath on his bare chest. You placed your hand onto his stomach and slowly progressed to explore his toned body.

“How exactly do you think this is helping us to cool down?”

Namjoon asked, sucking in his breath when you let your fingernails graze the side of his upper body.

“When did I say I wanted to cool down?”

You asked quietly, tilting your head up so you could meet his gaze. This was enough to convince Namjoon that he was allowed to act upon his feelings. He let his hand rest at the back of your head and leaned forward until your lips finally collided. He pulled you closer to himself and you wrapped your arms around his torso. The kiss became more heated and Namjoon let his tongue poke through his lips so you parted yours to let it in. When you had to let go of each other to be able to breathe again Namjoon stared at you, having to process for a moment if this was actually happening. With a huge grin you threw yourself onto him again to continue the kiss. Namjoon’s hands wandered up and down your back brushing against the straps of your bra. You felt his finger hesitate on the hooks of your bra.

“Go on – open it.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, oh my god, do you need a written declaration of consent?”

You giggled at how considerate he was being.

“Just wanted to make sure so you won’t hold it against me later.”

He smirked and with one move of his fingers he had opened the bra and pulled it away from underneath your body. Within seconds you found yourself turned over so you were laying on your back with Namjoon on top of you. With one hand he propped himself up to not crush you completely while his other hand immediately found its way to your breasts. Namjoon kissed you once more before he let his mouth trail down your chin and neck leaving hot kisses on your skin. You had closed your eyes revelling in the addictive feeling when you felt a sudden burst of pain shooting up from your breasts causing you to let out a surprised moan. Namjoon had pinched your right nipple with the hand he was using to massage your boobs. You opened your eyes in shock and found Namjoon smiling mischievously up at you. He had been keeping his eyes on you to observe how you reacted to his actions and was visibly enjoying himself. Letting his hand travel down to your stomach resulted in his face being conveniently positioned exactly over your breasts so he didn’t hesitate and began to caress them with his lips. Namjoon sucking on your tits while simultaneously exploring your still covered pubic area with his free hand had you aroused in no time and you could already feel your panties getting soaked from the movements of his hand, which Namjoon also didn’t fail to notice.

“Seems like you can get me wet in more than one way.”

You said referring to the accident earlier and Namjoon couldn’t refrain from laughing causing his body to vibrate which let his fingers move against your crotch in a delightful manner.

“Well, I know which way I prefer.”

Namjoon said when you let out another moan. He hooked his finger into your panties and pulled them down, so you lay before him completely undressed. His hands caressed your thighs for a bit until he put light pressure onto them to spread them open for him to kneel in-between. You suddenly felt the imbalance in your levels of being undressed, so you sat up catching Namjoon’s lips in a needy kiss while letting your hands palm his hardened length through his boxers for a moment before pushing the unnecessary piece of clothing down his legs so both of you were equally nude. Namjoon pushed you back to lay down again and you obliged. He let his one hand return to your breasts while the fingers of his other hand slid through your slick folds.

You didn’t want him to feel neglected and reached down so you could wrap one of your hands around Namjoon’s dick. Though your grip was only light, Namjoon let out a groan of pleasure at the sudden sensation. Encouraged by his response you slid your hand up and down his shaft and let your thumb graze over his tip every other time using the leaking drops of pre-cum to lube his length up. Namjoon stopped moving his fingers through your folds only to enter you with one finger a moment later. You let out a quiet mewl at the unexpected sensation. You kept your gaze on him, mesmerized at how Namjoon had closed his eyes and thrown his head back in pleasure when you had sped up your movements on his dick.

“God, Y/N, that feels so fucking good.”

Namjoon said letting out a sharp breath when you grazed his tip another time. Keeping up the pace Namjoon had set pushing in and out of your wetness he soon added a second finger. You whined at the delicious feeling and started speeding up jerking off Namjoon. When you felt the movements of his fingers getting unsteady you stopped only for Namjoon to shoot you a questioning look.

“Don’t give me that face. I don’t want you to finish now when the real fun hasn’t even started yet.”

You said and raised one of your eyebrows teasingly.

“But I don’t have any condoms with me. Do you?”

“Don’t worry, I’m on birth control, don’t you remember?”

“So, you are sure you want this?”

“Jesus, Namjoon, just fuck me already.”

You laughed, a little desperate by now.

Namjoon let out a low growl, your words being music in his ears. He moved his body back up to lay down next to you and involved you in another steaming kiss. Namjoon grabbed you by your waist and helped you get up. Straddling him, you sat on top of him and bowed down to kiss him again. He lifted your hips just a bit so he could position himself properly. With a last look into your eyes he lowered you down letting himself enter you slowly. You gasped at the wonderful sensation.

When Namjoon had pushed his length completely into you he held still for a moment to let you get accustomed to his size before he started moving your hips back and forth. When you began moving your hips yourself, with your hands placed on his chest for support, Namjoon moved his hands from your hips to your chest. Setting a steady pace, you began riding Namjoon, totally lost in the pleasure and Namjoon thought he had never seen you look more beautiful. He continued to massage your breasts and pinch your nipples occasionally which caused you to feel the familiar knot form in your stomach.

“Fuck, Joon, I’m close.”

You gasped out between moans and dug your nails into his chest. Namjoon felt himself near his orgasm as well but he was determined to finish second. He held onto your hips again and lifted you just a bit so he could thrust his hips into you from below giving you the chance to let yourself go completely.

“Don’t hold back, baby. I want you to come all over my dick.”

These words combined with Namjoon thrusting into you was enough to send you over the edge. Letting the waves of hot pleasure roll over you, you came undone moaning Namjoon’s name. Seeing your face of pure ecstasy and hearing his name come out of your mouth did it for Namjoon and he let his orgasm overwhelm him.

Panting, you both came down from your orgasms. You let Namjoon’s dick slide out of you so you could lay down again besides him. Smiling at each other like complete idiots you tried to catch your breath.

“I can’t believe it took so long for this to happen.”

“Well. I didn’t think it would happen at all. I thought you’d never see me as more than a friend.”

Namjoon responded and you looked at him in disbelief.

“Are you serious?? Kim Namjoon, you might be a genius on paper but when it comes to flirting you suddenly lose all ability to think.”

You laughed and Namjoon joined you.

You noticed the tiredness starting to set in again so you cuddled up to Namjoon and closed your eyes. You felt Namjoon place a kiss on your forehead then drifted away with Namjoon falling asleep soon after.

In the morning, you woke up from the blinding sunlight flooding the tent and heating it up even further. With your eyes still closed, you went over the events of the previous night smiling to yourself. When you opened them, you stared into the brown eyes of Namjoon.

“Morning sleepyhead.”

Namjoon said and scrunched up his nose when you poked him in the stomach.

“You know it’s creepy to watch people sleep?”

“I’m sure you can make an exception?”

“Hmm, kiss me and I might think about it.”

You grinned and Namjoon happily did as told. Since the morning sun made it almost unbearable to stay inside the tent any longer, the two of you got dressed and you tied your dishevelled hair up into what you hoped would look like an intentionally messy bun. When you crawled out of the tent you saw Hobi, Jin and Yoongi already sitting around the fireplace having some sandwiches for breakfast. Upon joining the others, Namjoon and you were greeted with knowing looks.

“Ah, finally, the two night owls grace us with their presence.”

Hobi said jokingly.

“Did you sleep well?”

Yoongi asked with a cheeky smile while raising his eyebrows.

“Yeah, we somehow all woke up because of some suspicious noises in the middle of the night. You don’t think you know where they came from, by any chance?”

Jin continued amused.

Namjoon tried not to make eye contact with them and instead preceded to scratch himself at the back of his head.

“Ah come on, now you’re being shy? Last night you didn’t bother if someone could hear us.”

You said and slightly bumped Namjoon in the side with your elbow, earning laughter from the other boys.

“It’s still embarrassing...”

Namjoon mumbled but relaxed himself and grabbed one of the sandwiches Jin had held in his direction handing you the other one.

When Namjoon placed a quick kiss on your cheek before taking a bite off his sandwich you thought that this year’s camping trip was definitely going to be your favourite so far and the fun had just started.

[softboywriting]

A Perfect Fall

Summary: You and Shawn have been best friends for most of your lives and since you were a teenager you’ve had a crush on him. He has no idea, or so you think. Things are about to change, and all it takes is a trip to the best pumpkin patch around for true feelings to surface. [fluff] [best friends to lovers] [fall/autumn theme]

Word Count: 4k

|Masterlist In Bio|

If someone were to ask you your favorite color you would say gold. Gold like the leaves on the trees in the middle of October. Gold like the letters of Shawn’s last name gilded across the back of the letter man jacket that sits over your desk chair at home that he left there a year ago. Gold like the sun going down over the river on a cool autumn night. But most of all, gold, like the color Shawn's eyes are when he sits across from you in a barn an hour from your house and stares out at horses in the nearby corral. He's beautiful. Breathtaking. Outstanding in every way. He's your best friend in the entire world and he has no idea that you're completely gone for him, or does he? Let's go back to how this day started.

Beeping, incessant, droning beeping. The sound of your alarm clock going off at its regular time, seven in the morning. Right now you should be getting up and making yourself appear to be somewhat human before heading to class, praying you remembered all of your homework. You should be scrambling through your kitchen, grabbing a banana for breakfast as you head out to meet Shawn in his Jeep. Not this week though. It's the first day of Thanksgiving break and you're so happy to be able to smash that snooze button and bury your face into a pillow.

Your phone goes off, a low buzz buzz against the pillow your head is on. You've almost fallen back to sleep, nearly reached that floaty state of perfect warmth under the blankets that gives you an express ticket to dreamland. Almost.

Buzz buzz.

"For the love of everything holy, can you go away?" You groan angrily into the pillow. As if the phone might switch itself into silent mode out of pure fear. That would be that day wouldn't it?

Buzz buzz.

You slide your hand under the pillow and extract your phone, turn your head just enough to see the screen and lay it against the pillow next to you. Three missed messages.

Shawn: you awake?

Shawn: get up loser i have coffee

Shawn: I'll come in there

You drop the phone on its face and tug your blanket up over your head. If he wants you to get up on your first day of this mini vacation from the hell that is your second year of college, he can come get you his damn self. He may be your best friend, and yes, you may be head over heels for him, but getting up early on vacation happens for no man.

The sound of rattling outside your window followed by a dull thump is a dead giveaway that Shawn has scaled your mother's new trellis and tripped on the old shingles of the back patio roof. Clumsy and dumb. That's Shawn for you.

"Get up, hey," he talks against the glass as if you'll hear him better by doing so but ends up only muffling his voice further. "I know you're up."

"Go away!"

"No!"

The latch on the window wiggles, you can hear a familiar scrape of his student ID card from his wallet against the wood of the window frame. You watch as the ancient lock flips 180 degrees and the window slides up, sending a cold gust of morning air into your bedroom.

"You're a dick." Shawn grumbles, squeezing through the narrow window frame. He's had trouble getting through it since freshman year of high school. Really the only reason he's climbing through it now is to avoid making too much noise coming in the front door and enduring the wrath of your dad who is surely still asleep because he works nights at the packing plant in town. Shawn woke him up once by just walking too loudly and that was enough.

"You're a dick for waking me up on my vacation." You roll over and face the wall.

Shawn flops on the bed, leaning over across your legs and waving something in your face. "I am not, I'm the best person ever."

"Nope."

"Come on! Look at the tickets!"

You slip your hand out of the blankets and snatch the papers from Shawn's hand. Two all access passes to the Friendly Farms Pumpkin Patch. You narrow your eyes at him and he raises his eyebrows. This is such an unfair move. He knows how much you love pumpkin patches and he knows that you've never been to the Friendly Farms Pumpkin Patch because it's so far away and it usually costs an arm and a leg if you don't buy preseason passes.

"Eh? Whatdya say? Me, you, old J-Bone and the open road to the best place to get your pumpkins this side of the river?"

You groan and drop the tickets on the pillow. "Okay! Okay fine I'll get up." You shove the blanket back and it covers his lap. "But stop calling the Jeep "J-Bone" it's so weird."

"She has a name okay, and I'm gonna call her by it."

You sit up and shove him down on the bed. "Freak."

"Only for you." He smirks, sticking his tongue out and making lewd licking motions.

"Oh God please stop." You throw your pillow at his face and get up to get dressed in whatever was semi clean. Laundry had taken a backseat to classwork these days, you’re planning on catching up during the break.

One big hoodie, Shawn's that he left at your house a few days ago, a pair of leggings under some fitted sweatpants and a lopsided ponytail later and you're ready to go. As promised Shawn has a coffee in the Jeep for you as well as a croissant breakfast sandwich.

"How long is this drive again?" You ask over a mouth full of buttery sausage and egg goodness. "An hour?"

"An hour and a half."

"I'm gonna go to sleep then."

Shawn chuckles. He pulls the Jeep out of your driveway and heads for the highway. "I have a feeling you'll stay awake."

"Why's that?"

"The drive is too beautiful to miss."

_________________________________

Shawn is absolutely correct. The drive down the highway is way too incredible to miss for just a few more minutes of sleep. Of course you've seen the trees around your town turn shades of red, orange and yellow before but driving through open roads where trees grow in massive forests completely unbridled by man, is an experience you won't soon forget. Never in your life have you seen so many different hues of fall colors at one time.

"Shawn, pull over, I need to get out and do something."

Shawn looks over and quickly turns off the highway onto the shoulder where the gravel meets the grass. "Everything okay?"

"More than okay." You grin and unbuckle your seatbelt. You open the passenger door and slide out, leaving the door open as you tromp across the grass to the edge of the forested area. Behind you Shawn kills the engine and you can hear his door open then close followed by your door being closed.

"What are you doing?" He laughs, following you into the trees. "We're not even at the pumpkin patch and you're going crazy."

"I've been crazy. You know that, come on, we've been friends for how long?"

"Twelve years and counting."

You stop before a tree that has bring pinkish red leaves on it. They're like no others around it and you pick up a few of the ones that have fallen. "Pink leaves." You hold them out and Shawn takes one.

"These are pretty. I've never seen them this color."

"Take my picture? I wanna remember this tree forever."

Shawn takes your phone and types in your pass code to unlock it. He's the only person on the planet who knows it beside you and you know his as well. "Alright, do you wanna pose or something?"

"I'm gonna throw a bunch of leaves up in the air and if you can, try to snap the picture as they fall around me?"

"I'll do my best." He chuckles and kneels down a bit to get you in full frame for a better angle.

"Okay on three? One, two, three!" You fling an arm full of leaves up into the air and laugh as they rain down over you.

"Nailed it."

"Really?!" You rush over and Shawn hands you the phone. Sure enough it's you standing and grinning at the leaves as they fall around you with the pink tree in the background. "Oh my God it's perfect."

Shawn puts his arm around you and starts walking back to the Jeep. "I've been messing around with my friend Josiah's camera a bit. He showed me a few tricks for everyday stuff."

"Oh wow, fancy boy."

"Shut up, I am not fancy."

"Fancy pants Mendes learning all the tips and tricks on photography to pick up chicks."

He scoffs. "Yeah, as if. I just wanted to try it out. Josiah takes some awesome photos and it looks so easy, I was curious how he did it."

"I'm just teasing you Shawn." You pat his chest as you reach the Jeep and he pulls his arm away from you. "I think it's cool that you're interested in photography. It's definitely something that could be useful one day."

"Like taking photos of you today."

You smile and let out a little laugh. "Yeah, definitely like today."

Shawn gets in the Jeep and you haul yourself up into the passenger's seat. "You ready for the real fun to begin?"

"Hell yeah. How many pumpkins do you think we can fit in the back of this thing?"

"I dunno," he says, looking into the back where the seats are down and then looks at you. "But we're not going to find out."

"Buzz kill."

"Sorry, but I'm not having my Jeep chock full of pumpkins."

"Psh, it's for science."

Shawn's rolls his eyes and signals as he pulls out onto the highway. The two of you have at least another forty minutes before you reach the farm. Shawn turns up the radio and you decide to lean the seat back and just enjoy the rest of the ride.

_________________________________

The entryway to the Friendly Farms Pumpkin Patch is huge. There are wrought iron gates with metal pumpkin cutouts all along the bars of the fencing with ivy like casts on the top. Shawn drives down the bumpy dirt road to the designated parking area and stops to park near the ticket windows and actual gates inside. There are maybe a dozen cars already parked as well, which considering the popularity of the place isn't hardly anyone. It's still early though, they have just opened for business at nine and it's only about a quarter till ten.

Shawn opens the back of the Jeep while you grab your backpack purse off the floor of the backseat. "Do you need a water bottle?"

"Yeah." You walk around to meet him. "I thought you were going eco friendly?"

"I am." He hands you a reusable metal bottle. "I promise I washed it this morning."

You slip the bottle into your side pocket and chuckle. "Like we haven't been sharing germs forever."

"True." He closes the door and pulls the tickets out of his back pocket. "Ready?"

"I was born ready."

Shawn wraps his arm around your shoulders and heads to the ticket windows. You're excited beyond belief to see what is in store for you beyond the corn stalk covered gates before you. It's going to be perfect.

_________________________________

To say the pumpkin patch is beyond expectations would be about right. You and Shawn walk past the ticket booths and through the gates into a whole town built up around the fall theme. There are shopping booths, food booths, a sign for a corn maze, a hay rack ride, and the pumpkin patch. There is a whole slew of games and places to take photos as well and all that is just what you can see when you walk inside. There's a whole path along the shops that just keeps going and you are floored.

Shawn grins at you, beaming, because you're beaming right back at him. He knew this place was going to be great. Photos online just didn't do it justice. "What do you wanna do first?"

"Just...take it all in." You walk forward toward the center of the town like set up where there is a huge wooden windmill, hay bales and benches all sitting in a circle around it.

Shawn walks along beside you and chuckles. "It's pretty awesome."

"Awesome isn't the word." You laugh and plop down on a hay bale next to a smiley homemade scarecrow. "It's a dream, Shawn."

"I'm glad." He thumbs toward a nearby caramel apple stand. "Let's get a snack and start this day right huh?"

"You read my mind."

_________________________________

You and Shawn spend the whole late morning into the early afternoon wandering around, checking out the entire lay out of the pumpkin patch. You grab cider around eleven and then cocoa at noon. A late lunch consists of a shared smoked turkey leg, a funnel cake and some tomato salad that was being made fresh by some little old ladies at a booth near the center of the patch. The food is incredible and you and Shawn take turns feeding each other bites of this and that, giggling when one of you ends up with powdered sugar on your face from the funnel cake.

Spending time like this with Shawn is the best and worst thing to ever happen to you. It's a glimpse at what life with him would be like if you were together. Your heart swells every time he leans in to say something about the scenery that he’s noticed because you think he's going to kiss you.

Lunch wraps up and Shawn goes to toss your trash in a nearby oak barrel that's set up as a trashcan. He dusts his hands off on his jeans and pulls his sweater off over his head. "Here," he holds it out to you and you raise your eyebrows.

"Why do I want it?"

"Because you're going to get cold on the hayrack ride."

"Psh no I won't."

"Yeah you will." Shawn bunches up the sweater from the bottom up and holds it out for you to put your arms in. "Come on, I know you wanna."

You stick your arms out and he helps you get the sleeves over them and tugs the sweater down so your head pops through the neck hole. "It's so warm." You look down and pull out the soft knit fabric that's far too large on you. "You must be like a thousand degrees."

Shawn shrugs. "I'm always hot. You've slept with me, you know that."

"I-I-" You freeze, brain definitely going down a very different road from what Shawn means.

"Yes?" He chuckles.

"I have not slept with you."

"Well, not like that but... y'know." He shrugs and you knit your brows together.

What does that mean? Y'know what? What do you know? Does he want to sleep with you like that? What...just what?

Shawn waves his hand in your face. "Hey, earth to space cadet. The hayrack ride is gonna be boarding soon."

"Oh! Yeah!" You shake your head and start walking toward the signs pointing to the line for it. Shawn follows close behind, throwing his arm around your shoulders and leaning his head on yours.

You and Shawn take a seat at the back of the ride on a hay bale covered with a red plaid blanket. He's completely right about you needing his sweater. It is a lot colder up off the ground with the breeze from the moving ride blowing around you.

"Look, there's the pumpkins!" Shawn says, pointing to the left.

You look over through the slats of the walls of the ride. Sure enough there is a sea of orange pumpkins and deep green leaves that are yellowing with age as the plants are ready to be picked. There are a couple of very big ones and you definitely need one of those. You don't care how you get it to the car, you need it.

"Check those out," you say, pointing out the massive pumpkins.

"Holy cow those gotta be like fifty pounds."

"I want one."

"Okay."

You sit back and stare at him with your eyes wide. "Okay? You're not gonna convince me to get a few small ones instead?"

"Nope." He grins. "I'll buy you that pumpkin there."

"What's the catch?"

"No catch."

You narrow your eyes but don't argue the deal any further. He must have some motive. There has to be some catch. Maybe he'll say you have to move it or something. Seems fishy.

The ride stops at the entrance to the pumpkin picking area and you and Shawn get off with a few other visitors. There are tons of great pumpkins all around but you waste no time heading for the giant ones.

"How are you going to lift that?" Shawn pipes up as you reach them.

"Well, that's why I've got you."

"Oh? I'm gonna lift that?"

"Please?" You pout your lip out. "You said you'd buy it for me."

"I did." He chuckles, circling the giant orange mass. "I sure did."

"Regretting that?"

"Absolutely not."

You put your hands into the sleeves of Shawn's sweater and put them over your ears. They're cold and you wish you'd brought a hat or even some earmuffs. "Can I get it? For real?"

"Yes." Shawn kneels down and lifts the pumpkin up with ease. "Let's go."

"Isn't that heavy?"

"Not that heavy." He smirks and you walk next to him out of the patch to the line of employees waiting with ATVs that have little trailers attached for carrying visitors pumpkins to their cars or to the front entrance to drop them off until they leave.

"Name and car description?" The woman at the ATV asks as Shawn loads up the pumpkin.

"Ah-"

"Mendes with an s. Black four door Jeep Wrangler." Shawn says, dusting his hands off. "We'll pick it up at the gates."

"Alrighty." The woman scribbles down Shawn's information and peels a sticker of her clipboard to put on the pumpkin. "You got a big one eh?"

"Yes." Shawn wraps his arms around you and lays his chin on top of your head. "Biggest one for my best friend."

"That's so sweet. Would you like to pay here or at the gate?"

"Here." Shawn pulls his wallet out and hands over a ten dollar bill, the rate for extra large pumpkins from the yard. "Thank you ma'am."

"It's what we do," she says with a smile and a tip of her floppy straw hat. "I'll see this baby up to the gates. Have a friendly fun time!"

You and Shawn wave her off as she drives away with your pumpkin.

Shawn pulls away from you and grabs your sweater covered hands. "Wanna go over to the barn and feed the horses?"

You glance over at the big red barn where they show the horses and cattle throughout the day. "Sure. It doesn't look took busy."

Shawn turns around and squats down. "Get on my back, I'll carry you over there."

"What? Why? I can walk!" You laugh and he pats his back.

"Come on!"

"Okay okay, don't have to tell me twice." You climb on his back and he hoists you up so he can hook his arms under your legs. It reminds you of when you were nine and you first met. Shawn was big then too, tall for his age and athletic as ever being in hockey almost year round. He would always give you piggy back rides around the yard to catch lightning bugs on hot summer nights.

Shawn drops you off on a haybale near the first stall inside the barn. There is literally no one in there at the moment and you have the place all to yourselves. "I'm going to get a couple of drinks. Any preference?"

"Cider is fine. Hot please."

He disappears and you lean back against the old wooden wall. Today has been one of the best days of your life hands down. It's everything you love all wrapped into one, a pumpkin patch, oversized sweaters, hot cider, pumpkin picking...Shawn. You sigh and chuckle to yourself. Did Shawn realize how romantic this is? Did he have any clue how it must seem to any stranger passing by? The two of you would be the cutest couple. The dynamic is there, but what you lack is a pair of balls to say or do anything.

"Hot cider." Shawn says, handing you your brown paper cup and sitting down on the hay bale opposite you. "Fresh too."

"Thanks." You smile as you sip the warm spicy sweet liquid.

Shawn stares out at the corral nearby, eyes catching and sparkling in the late afternoon sun. He's gorgeous. Everything about him makes your heart soar. From his soft eyes to his slightly rough hands curled delicately around his paper cup, he is truly the only person you've cared so deeply for.

"Can I ask you something?" You say softly, barely realizing you've spoken. Too late to take it back now.

"Anything."

"Why haven't we ever gone out?"

He chuckles, a wide smile spreading across his face like wildfire. "Haven't we though?"

"No?"

"Can I tell you something?"

You lean forward, setting your cup beside your folded legs on the hay bale. "Of course, anything."

"This was supposed to be a date." He bites his lip and looks down, thumb circling the spout of his lid. "I was going to ask you out, like, for real."

"W-what?"

"Yeah." He laughs, looking up, anywhere but at you. "I chickened out though. I didn't ask you, I just sort of handed you the tickets and said let's go. Which in retrospect was fine, but it's definitely not what I had planned on doing."

"You wanted to take me on a date?"

"Yeah?"

"You...you want to be more than friends?"

Shawn rubs the back of his neck. "Shit, I guess? It's weird. You make me happier than literally anyone I've ever dated. You get my jokes and you sass me right back when I get smart with you. You're really beautiful and sexy in this crazy everyday way without even trying. And you're so smart and- how could I not want to date you? I've literally been so stupid for my entire life because I-"

You lean across the hay bale and press your lips to his. It's a moment you've been waiting for since you were thirteen years old and first realized you had feelings for him. You didn't expect to be the one initiating the kiss but here you are and there Shawn is. You pull back and Shawn just gawks at you.

"That was...you...you taste like apple cider."

You giggle. "You do too, dork."

"Can we do it again?" He asks, putting his cup aside and leaning toward you. "I think I need another taste."

"Mmhmm."

Shawn cups your cheeks and brings you in, kissing you lovingly like this is his way of making up for the last twelve years of your lives. He tugs you forward gently and you crawl over onto his lap, straddling his thighs as you grip his hair. It's been forever since he's had a haircut and it's a bit long, soft as can be, curly and absolutely grabable.

"Hey," he mutters, pulling back just enough to break the kiss. He bumps his nose to yours and you open your eyes to see his beautiful green and gold flecked hazel ones staring back at you. "Do you wanna go out with me?"

You smile and nudge his nose with yours once more. "I thought you'd never ask."

End.

----------------------

Please Reblog if you read, enjoyed, or just want to save for later!

Thank you so much for reading this piece!  - A

*****Note: none of my works should be posted anywhere outside of my linked accounts. I do not give permission to repost with or without credit to my accounts. Please notify me of any reposted fics.*****

[ms-rampage]

Eden's Gate: Left Behind Chapter 1 - Welcome to Hope County

A new series!!!. Take place 2 years before the events of Kidnapped.

I created "Hope County University" for this series, and a few other locations that aren't in the game. Because its all headcanon shit.

Warnings: None

Word count: 1.9k

John Seed slightly out of character. (That's what happens when you encounter a Winchester 😂😂)

*********************************

Hope County, Montana, February 2018

*Arizona by Hey Monday plays on the radio*

A black 1970 Monte Carlo with a small trailer attached to it drives down the road with an Arizona license plate on it "ARIZONA E34R90D". 

19 year old Kate Winchester, who just moved out of her aunt and uncle's house drove 7 hours from Jackson, Wyoming to Hope County, Montana. Drumming her fingers on the steering wheel to song. 

Starting her new life, leaving the hunter life behind her, she applied and got accepted at Hope County University. 

Hoping to get her Master of Science degree in Psychology, and then move on to get her Doctorate Degree. 

Luckily her aunt and uncle were able to cover her tuition for the whole year. She even told them that she was willing to pay her own rent, and which surprisingly is only $750 a month. Hell her rent is cheaper here, than Arizona and Wyoming put together, but of course they're willing to pay for it, even though she refused, so she saves some money there.

She’s been attending college since she was 15 years old. She lied about her age to get a head start, with the help of her aunt Laura, and her grandmother Eliza. She attended community college in Wyoming before wanting to get transferred out of state.

She was able to rent out a small 2 bedroom, 1 bathroom house with a decent size backyard that is owned by the University, which is why the rent is pretty cheap usually it costs a lot more, and she also got a job at the University's café & diner with starting pay at $14.50. To her that seems very unrealistic but she’ll take it, she ain’t complaining. 

She drives down the road with her dog Haley in the passenger seat with her head out the window trying to bite the wind as they drive down the road.

"Smell that fresh Montana air Hale" she says with a smile, Haley pulls her head back in and lets out a bark, her eyes widened and has that look like she's smiling. 

You know that look dogs do with their tongues hanging out making them look like they're smiling. 

Driving down the road, off on the side, a huge billboard sign with a photo of some man with the caption. 

“We Love You and We Will Take You”

"That's very welcoming" she jokes.

Kate turns onto a small side road that leads to her new home. 

She drives slowly, while looking at the GPS on her phone. 

After a few minutes she finds the house.

"Here it is" she says, pulling into the driveway. 

Shutting off the car, and getting out. 

"Come on Hale" she says, padding her thigh. 

She takes the house keys out of her pocket, and opens the door. 

It's a decent size house for someone who's living on their own, the house is slightly furnished. Her uncle Brent sent some of their old furniture to her new house.

A coffee table, a few chairs, few lamps, a night stand, and a full size bed with the frame, head, footboard, mattress and box spring.

The backyard is bigger than she thought. She opens the door, and lets Haley out to the back. 

"Go sniff around" she tells her.

The 2 1/2 year old German Shepherd sniffs the corners of the fence, looking for a spot to do her business. 

Kate goes back inside, leaving the backdoor open for Haley.

She checks out the rest of the house, the 2 bedrooms, the bathroom and washroom, luckily a washer and dryer comes with the place. So at least she wouldn't want to buy it.

She goes back to the living room, and sees that Haley came back inside. 

She goes to close the backdoor, locking it, she heads out to the front and unpacks her trailer. Boxes, boxes and boxes of her stuff, clothes, books, her WiFi router, personal hygiene products, small furniture, stuff for school, some groceries she has in her mini fridge, some of Haley's stuff, her toys and food. 

She finishes unpacking around 3:30pm, her room is all set up, her bed is fixed, all her clothes are put away in the closet and dresser, she has photos of her friends, family and posters of bands she likes hanging up on the walls. 

She set up her 60inch TV, the box and WiFi router in the living room, she put up curtains on all the windows, and put some plants out on the front porch. 

She has all of her hunter stuff in the 2nd bedroom, her angel blades, demon blades, holy water, bags of salt, her books, her dad’s journal. Bullets filled with rock salt, and all of her other hunting supplies.

She has everything set up, and all she needed now was a kitchen table, a couch and maybe some appliances like a microwave, toaster and a coffee maker. 

She sighs in relief, lays back on her bed, Haley jumps on, laying next to her. 

"You wanna go into town?!?" she asks the dog, she looks at her while tilting her head to the right. 

"You wanna go for a walk?!?" she asks again, she tilts her head to the left while still looking at her. She lets out a loud bark which catches Kate off guard, and jumps off the bed.

Running back and forth down the hall, jumping at her on the bed in excitement. 

She gets up from the bed. 

"Okay let me find your leash" she says, while going into the living room. 

She goes through some of her boxes. 

After a few minutes, she finds her leash and puts it on her collar. Debating whether or not to take her in the car, or walk into town. 

"It's only a 10-20 minute walk from here to town" she says out loud. 

After a couple of minutes, she decides to drive, just in case some stores don't allow animals in, she can leave Haley in the car with all the windows down of course, or maybe leave her outside.

They drive into town, and she parks her car next to a gas station store. 

"Come one Hale" she says. 

She jumps out of the car, Kate locks it up and they walk past the small shops. 

A grocery store, a pharmaceutical store, a gun shop, an autoshop, and  lastly a bar called "The Spread Eagle". 

She looks around, and sees an appliance store, she really does need those appliances. 

She walks closer, and sees a sign on the door saying "Sorry, no animals allowed inside". 

"Of course" she says to herself. 

She ties Haley's leash to a parking meter under a tree 

"I'll be right back" she says to her, petting her head. 

She goes inside the store and looks around. Right off the bat she finds a toaster with 4 slots, and it costs $30 in which to her is a steal. 

She finds a coffee maker and a microwave all that costs a decent amount, less than she thought it would be. 

She pays for her stuff, and goes back outside to untie Haley, they walk back to the car, and put the appliances in the backseat covering them with a blanket. 

They continue to walk around the small town of Falls End located in the Holland Valley region. They cross the street to go onto the opposite side. Up ahead Kate sees a small group of people walking into a church on the other side of the street. Thinking nothing of it.

While on the other side of the street at Falls End Church, John Seed is standing outside of it holding the Book of Joseph, preaching.

"Sin must be exposed so it may be absolved. We must wash away our past" while some of his men escort some locals into the church. 

"You will know the power of Yes, you will confess your sins" he continues.

As he looks around he sees Kate with Haley walking on the opposite side of the street. 

He stares at her as she walks by, a smirk appears on his face. Perhaps he is engrossed by her?. He gets a weird feeling in his stomach but he ignores it. 

He continues to watch her as she walks further down the street away from the church. 

He shakes his head, snapping out of that trance, and continues to preach to the sinners.

Kate walks down the street towards a different market. Once again they don't allow animals in the store. 

So she ties Haley to a small iron fence in the shade "I'll be back'" she tells her again. 

She shops for about 25 minutes, she doesn't like to keep her dog outside that long especially out in public, she grabs bread, eggs, orange juice, fruit, cereal, milk, breakfast sausages, bacon, dog treats, grounded coffee and butter. 

Typical stuff you would buy at a grocery store. 

She pays for her stuff, goes outside, unties Haley putting the leash around her wrist. 

"Here you can hold your treats" she says, as she gives Haley her bag of Beggin Strips. 

She carries it in her mouth making the bags less heavy for Kate, and they head back to the car. They cross the street, now walking on the church side. John steps out of it, and sees Kate walking towards the church. 

He gets a better look at her, she's really cute. Actually she’s more than cute, she’s beautiful. Black hair past her shoulders, brown eyes, looks like she could be 19-22 years old?. Could she be a college student?. He's about to say something to her, but it gets ruined when one of his men calls out for him. 

"John!!" they call out. 

Turning his head to look back at him. 

He quickly looks back at Kate who is too far for him to call out to her. 

He rolls his eyes in annoyance, and goes back inside the church to see what they want. 

Kate walks back to her car, and puts her groceries in the back seat. 

Haley jumps into the front seat, and they drive off. 

They get stopped at a red light in front of the church, John looks out the window, and sees a black 70 Monte Carlo with a German Shepard sticking its head out the window. 

He quickly recognizes the dog, and sees Kate in the driver seat. 

Quickly, he goes outside before the light turns green. He doesn’t know what to say to her, so he yells out "Nice car!!". 

Kate can't see who yelled it because Haley is blocking her view from the passenger side, and is barking at some of the peggies outside the church. 

So she yells back, "Thank you!!" followed with a honk of the horn. She in a way acknowledged John even if she didn't really see him. 

She continued to drive down the road heading back home. 

After a 10 minute drive, she makes it home, and puts all her groceries away, hooks up the appliances and sits back on one of her chairs for the rest of the day watching TV with Haley chilling at her feet. 

“What a day Hale” she says, resting her feet on the table.

*3 in half hours later*

That night John is baptizing, cleansing some sinners, making them a step closer to being a part of Eden’s Gate. He’s doing his usual thing, making sure they are cleansed, and washed away from their sins. 

He can’t seem to get Kate off his mind, he finds this very strange because these are some new feelings, that he has never felt before. 

After he finishes the baptism, Joseph notices something is off about his younger brother. 

He approaches him once he’s finished.

“John?!” he says, approaching him. “What is troubling you brother?”.

John doesn’t know what to say, he stumbles with his words “Nothing, Joseph”.

He places his hand on John's shoulder, their foreheads touching. 

“It’s about a girl, isn’t it?” he asks, sounding like he already knew what this was all about.

John looks down, and lets out a soft sigh.

“Go to her. She can be your other half, when we cross Eden’s Gate” he tells him, before walking away. 

John looks up at his older brother as he walks away, leaving him to contemplate with what he should do next. 

[gamesception]

Retphienix said:

As someone who knows exceptionally little on this series, just hearing this was a fun look at the sausage being made- a scenario painted to prove a point that in itself loses a lot of traction and believability when coupled with the whole of the world they are trying to show, it’s interesting stuff!

It is interesting.  Especially since you can see what the devs were going for.  They’re very proud of their Chantry/Templars vs. Mages moral dilemma.  A significant portion of Origins revolves around it, it’s the biggest overall thread and main climax of dragon age 2, and it’s the focus of the first major chunk of Inquisition.  But I don’t think it works nearly as well as the devs thought it did...

Like, right off the bat, we’re talking about an oppressed group vs. an oppressing authority.  The decision to make that sort of situation a morally grey, both sides have a point kind of conflict is in itself an extremely dubious one.  Many western rpgs are happy to let the player play a ‘bad guy’ and make evil choices, the Chantry could have just been unambiguously in the wrong, morally, but they’re also the more powerful force so siding with them could mean an easier time turning Ferelden against Logain and stronger and more numerous forces to fight the Blight - an army of Templars vs. like a dozen mages.  That sort of decision would have fit right in with the rest of the game.

Even if they wanted to present the Templar side as maybe arguably having a point, they can already do that.  Setting possession and abomination aside entirely, mages are, at the least dangerous, dudes armed with ak-47s in a medieval world, and, at the most dangerous, have literal mind control powers.  If you let a class of people with that kind of power disparity over the general populace go around unchecked, you are going to end up in a totalitarian magocracy - which is already part of the setting via the history of the Tevinter Imperium.  Andraste, at least in the stories you hear early in the first game, was rising up against a the tyranny of a magocratic slave state, *not* the apocalyptic threat of global demonic incursion.  Remove possession from the setting and the Chantry Templars are holding back the historically proven threat of magic-backed tyranny, but in the process are oppressing an entire class of people and also just so happen to be consolidating magical power under their own control - magical power they’ve then used to effectively conquer several nations, including the formerly feared Imperium, and drive their one-time elven allies out of the homeland their own Jesus-figure promised them.  In a real way, the holy crusade to overthrow a tyrannical magocracy ended up just creating another one, only with a cast of priests above the mages.

And that would have been interesting to explore.

But then you add the warp and daemonic incursion straight out of 40k, and shockingly setting elements designed for a grimdark self-parody miniatures game do not translate very well to a long form crpg that wants to be smart and serious and morally complicated.

Because, in addition to the regular danger of some people having magic in a world where everyone else mostly just has sharp rocks on sticks, now all those magic people are also just one bad dream away of burning a city-state sized hole in the map, if not plunging the entire world into a demonic apocalypse.  I mean, granted, this is a world that already regularly faces the threat of world-ending calamities in the Blights, but it’s hard to see how there is even a world at all when it should have ended the very first time a desire demon stumbled across some horny teenage mage’s first wet dream.

But even granting the suspension of disbelief, the devs were aiming for ‘maybe the Chantry Templars have a point’ but overshot completely and landed square in ‘it doesn’t matter that mages are people and it doesn’t matter how useful they can be, for their own sake and the sake of the world they absolutely need to be wiped out.’  We’re way beyond any meaningful comparison to real life oppressed groups, we’re talking about a fantasy world where some people are born with nuclear bombs in their chests that as long as they live can go off at any time, and it’s far more humane to put those people down as painlessly as possible than to wait until a few of them through no real fault of their own kill literally everyone on the planet - including themselves.  Imprisoning them in the Circle isn’t cruel overkill, it’s insanely reckless underkill.

And maybe the devs realized that to an extent?  Because IIRC the similar plot threads in the second game are toned way, way down.  Like there’s an apostate blood mage, and the scope of their rampage is some serial killing.  They’re a threat on the level of Jack the Ripper, not nuclear bombs.  And the boss of the mages circle uses blood magic to turn into a big monster, but not because he lost control or was possessed by a demon, rather it’s a desperate move they’re only forced into because the templars are already moving to wipe them out - which is itself a response to an act of terrorism not a possession fueled nightmare like we see in Redcliffe or the Mage’s Circle in Origins.  There is one abomination/possession that I recall, of an elven wizard, but that’s presented as a more interesting and subtle threat, not an instant localized demonic incursion.

And from what I can tell, the fandom mostly ignores the apocalyptic threat aspect because it’s over the top and dumb to instead focus on the layers of control thing, treating the moral issue as if it was the one I previously described, where Mages forced into circles under Templar supervision to work exclusively for the Chantry is a matter of control and consolidation of power justified by fear of what free mages would choose to do with their magic, on purpose, not about the thousands that they could kill accidentally if they ever slip up and lose their mind to a possessing demon.

But I could be wrong in that impression of the fandom, which I’m largely tangential to.

[ericsonclan]

Meat-tivity

Summary: Marlon and Mitch get a brilliant idea.

Word Count: 1387

Read on A03:

Clementine walked into the breakroom to find Marlon and Mitch tittering and chuckling as they both crouched over Marlon’s phone at the table. Raising an eyebrow, Clementine made her way over to them, trying to get a look at what was on the phone from behind.

Marlon was the first to notice her. “Oh, hey Clem. Just got in?”

“Yep. What are you guys giggling about?”

Mitch snorted. “We were laughing at this whack ass list of Christmas nativities Marlon found. People do the weirdest things for Christmas,”

“Oh yeah? Like what?” Clementine leaned forward to see the photos. There certainly were a lot of them. Some of the nativities were kitschy like a clay owl nativity or a balloon animal one while others were geeky like a Star Wars nativity featuring only R2Ds and another comprised of all the Justice league superheroes.

“Bet Aasim has the R2D2 one at his place,” Mitch commented with a smirk.

Marlon chuckled. “Wonder what Ruby will think when she sees that,”

Clementine smiled at the pair’s banter as they continued to scroll through the nativity pictures. The nativities didn’t seem that crazy to her, but she was glad that these two were having a good time with them.

“Now that one’s cute,” Marlon commented as they scrolled past a picture of an all dog nativity.

“Eh, this one is more my speed,” Mitch pointed to a nativity featuring various kinds of alcohol as the figures. Suddenly Mitch stopped scrolling through the list on Marlon’s phone. “Holy shit, this is the best one of all!” He held it up so both Marlon and Clementine could see it clearly. The photo showed a casserole dish on top of which was all the standard pieces of the nativity: barn, shepherds, baby Jesus, but every piece was composed entirely of meat. “It’s a meat-tivity!” Mitch exclaimed with glee.

“Dude, that’s awesome!” Marlon chuckled before taking a screenshot of the nativity. “Gotta show that to Sophie later. It’ll crack her up,”

“You don’t think…” Mitch began, slowly eyeing Marlon then looking up at Clementine.

Clementine raised an eyebrow. “Think what?”

“Should we maybe… make a meat-tivity of our own?” Mitch’s voice dropped to a conspiratorial whisper.

“Hell yeah!” Marlon raised his hand in the air for a high five which Mitch immediately returned. “Let’s do it!”

“You guys have fun with that. I’ve got work to do,” Clementine declared as she walked out of the break room. Both guys were still discussing the meat-tivity as she left. It was good to see them getting into the Christmas spirit, that is, if a project like this counted.

“Alright guys, the moment has arrived!” Mitch announced as everyone gathered round the table in the break room. Louis had allowed the morning meeting to be interrupted when Mitch and Marlon declared they had something special to show the whole crew. Marlon stood behind Mitch, proudly holding a tinfoil casserole dish covered by a dishcloth. Placing it in the center of the table, he began a drumroll. “I present to you the MEAT-TIVITY!!” Mitch bellowed “1…2…3!”

The dishcloth was pulled back to reveal the most bizarre nativity any of them had ever seen. The base of the casserole dish was a meatloaf, forming the foundation upon which the nativity would be built. Slabs of meatloaf had also been cut out of the corners to be used as building blocks for the stable in which the nativity took place. The stable ceiling however was made of bacon, draped over a tinfoil skeleton and baked to crispness.

All the figures from the shepherds to the wise men to Mary, Joseph and baby Jesus were made from miniature sausages. Their clothes appeared to be a mix of bologna and more bacon while their arms were made from toothpicks. Peppercorns formed the eyes of all the cast and the three wise men all had teeny tinfoil crowns. Some of the animals had been made out of sausages as well, though these ones seemed to be stuck together on burnt pretzel bits.

“Well, what does everyone think?” Mitch asked with a cheeky grin.

“What’s that?” Violet pointed to a vague brown blob resting against the side of the stable.

“That’s a camel,” Marlon replied. “It’s made out of hamburger,”

“It looks like manure,”

“It sort of… melted after we baked it,”

Ruby looked truly pissed. Her arms were crossed and her eyes narrowed as she stared down both boys. “Well I for one find the whole thing offensive. It’s sacrilegious!”

“More like sacri-licious,” Mitch quipped, popping one of the wise men in his mouth.

Louis stepped forward to deescalate the situation. “Well you two, as much as we love your enthusiasm and creative spirit, we can’t have you keep your, um, ‘meat-tivity’ here at work. It could be seen as funny, but it also could understandably offend people,”

Marlon’s eyes were sad as he looked down at his meat-tivity then back at Ruby. “Sorry, Ruby. We didn’t mean anything by it. It was just a joke,”

Ruby’s eyes softened. “I know you didn’t mean anything by it, Sug, but it just don’t sit right with me to see baby Jesus wrapped in bacon and lying on a meatball manger,”

“It is a bit much,” Brody agreed quietly.

“I think it’s awesome!” Willy declared, smiling over at his big brother who’d let him stay for the big reveal.

“Yeah!” AJ agreed, high-fiving Willy. “It’s the best nativity ever!”

“Clearly opinions are split. That’s why it has to go. Sorry, guys,” Louis said with a shrug.

“Well what are we supposed to do with this?” Mitch asked with an exasperated huff. “I don’t want this thing stinking up my fridge at home!”

“You could throw it out…?” Louis suggested.

“But we put so much work into it!” Marlon protested. ‘It’d be a shame to just throw it all away!”

“You could eat it,” Clementine suggested. “It is made out of meat after all,”

That piqued the guys’ interest. Marlon and Mitch shared a long look before both nodding. Sitting down on opposite sides of the table, they dug in, shoving their hands into the meatloaf and pulling out large chunks.

“Good Lord, use some cutlery!” Ruby protested. “This is a restaurant for goodness’ sake!”

“This is how real men eat!” Mitch shot back, his mouth full of meatloaf. “Anyone who wants to join in, go right ahead!”

They didn’t get very many takers. Most people headed out after Louis gave a few quick announcements. A few lingered to watch the carnage while the adventurous few tried a couple bites themselves. Willy and A.J. were the first volunteers and the most invested in eating some of the mysterious meat-tivity. Clementine watched her little brother in amusement as he dug in with his bare hands and participated in the manly destruction of the meat-tivity. She was glad this had taken place on a Saturday so A.J. could join in the fun. Pulling out her phone, she snuck a few pictures of the meat-tivity being devoured.

Marlon paused and smiled for a photo as he saw it was being taken. His face was covered in bacon grease and bits of meatloaf littered his chin. “Can you send me that photo, Clem? I got some shots of the meat-tivity in its different stages and the finished product. That picture will round out the set,”

“Sure, Marlon,” Clementine glanced over to see Louis hesitantly nibbling on one of the sheep. She captured the moment and grinned as her boyfriend self-consciously blushed at being caught in the act.

“It’s not half bad,” he murmured, biting into the miniature sausage torso.

“If you say so. I think I’ll stick to photography,”

They got about two thirds of the way through the meat-tivity before all the participants were too full to continue and the rest of the creation was inevitably thrown into the trash. As Clementine scrolled through the pictures of the impromptu feast, she felt a happy glow within herself. Had meat-tivity actually kickstarted the Christmas spirit within her? She supposed crazier things had happened. Tucking her phone away, Clementine headed toward the front of the house to start her shift. In the end, the meat-tivity had indeed brought several of them joy; it truly was a Christmas miracle.

[stanbillyhargrove]

Ghosts Chp 2

Billy x Katrina

A/N: this is a multi chapter series that will contain smut, angst, fluff, substance abuse

Katrina's POV

Billy's memories when I first touched him in my apartment were intoxicating. The smell of salt water lingering on my skin after swimming, the warmth of sun that threatened to scald skin. I wanted more of that, to sit all night and trail my hand along his skin and keep soaking in the warmth that I so desperately craved.

Elle had been showing up more and more, even though I wanted her to leave. Sitting on the counter while I cooked, trying to bury her nose in my hair while I showered. It didn't matter how many times I cried and begged for her to leave me alone. How many times I said it wasn't fair to keep seeing her.

I was rushing out of my apartment after seeing Elle again when I smacked into Billy's chest. I instantly felt the fear of a child listening to their parents yelling and the need to protect someone. Then, when he looked down at me it changed and I saw faceless bodies twisting with mine, tasted their sweat and the sweet burn of alcohol. I hurried away from him, went to a bar and didn't come back until after my shift the next day. Spent the night with a boy who offered me a pill and wanted to take me home, another boy who's memories were flooded with sweaty bodies that whined and moaned. I didn't see Elle anymore that night, not after I took the pill, I didn't see anyone that I shouldn't. The emptiness where they usually had been was sort of peaceful but as soon as the drugs wore off as I slept in my bed Elle was right there again.

"What do you want?" I hissed at her, "you're not real."

"Oh, Katie, if I'm not real why can you feel me?" She asked, dragging her hand along my waist.

The smell of my shampoo and a sweet morning kiss filled my thoughts.

"Ellie," I whimpered, "I'm dreaming."

Her hand trailed down to dip between my thighs, making me whine with her teasing.

I was thoroughly aroused when she whispered, "tell golden boy not to make toast."

I saw smoke pour out of a door and smelled the acidic stench of burnt bread and woke with a start, still feeling the cool touch of Elle's hand on me even though she had vanished. Quickly sent Billy a text even though it was four in the morning.

- Don't burn the toast.

I dipped my hand under my pajama shorts, felt the wetness that had begun to pool there and spread it around with a soft sigh. Reached over to grab a vibrator from the bottom drawer of my bedside table, turned it on and pressed it against my clit. Bit my lip to muffle any sounds as I gave myself up to the feeling. Came with a quiet groan and then sank back into my bed to go back to sleep.

I woke up a few hours later to the sound of a fire alarm. I jumped out of my bed, pulled on my leather jacket and stepped out into the hall of the building. The door to Billy's apartment was open, a little trail of smoke streaming out from it. Waving the smoke away, I walked up to his door and saw him by an open window in his living room trying to fan the smoke outside. He was only wearing a pair of sweatpants, his upper body bare and flexing as he tried to wave the smoke out the window.

"Hey neighbor, what happened?"

His head whipped around to look at me, "burnt my fucking breakfast, thank you very much."

I held my hands up as I leaned against the door, "hey now, don't get mad at me, I was sleeping."

"I was trying to figure out your stupid text and then," he swept his hand out towards the kitchen.

I looked over at the blackened bread sticking out of the toaster, the dry eggs stuck to the bottom of a pan and whispered, "holy shit."

I can tell the future? No, no way, it's just a coincidence.

"Yeah, holy shit," he grumbled, stepping away from the window now that the air had cleared a bit.

"You know toasters have timers on them right?"

He gave me a withering look as he walked back to his kitchen to throw his breakfast in the trash, "shut up."

I closed the door behind me as I stepped into his apartment, "do you work today?"

Billy shook his head, "nah, just gunna hit the gym and hang out."

"Well why don't I make you breakfast? Or we could go get something? Since I apparently made you wreck your first one," I smirked, trying to hold in my laugh.

"Sure," he grumbled, "what cha got?"

"I make amazing french toast and I have sausages," I offered.

"Sounds great," I watched his eyes rake up and down my body, taking in my barely there pajamas, "nice shorts."

I gave him a pointed look, "you are no more dressed than I am."

He scratched at his bare abs, a grin on his face, "least I have pants on," he joked, plucking a shirt off his couch before following me out.

--

I passed a plate to Billy, who was sitting on my kitchen counter, looking around at my apartment. Piled high on his plate was french toast, made just the way Elle taught me with just a hint of orange for brightness.

"Your place is..." he started.

I cocked an eyebrow at him, taking a bite of my french toast as I waited for him to choose his words.

"Chaotic?"

I looked around at all the plants I'd collected since I moved in. They were everywhere, filling windowsills, shelves and a couple tables. I loved the comfort of them, like I was living in a tropical jungle, but in truth it wasn't me who wanted them all. It was the blonde woman, Olivia. She'd point out neglected plants in the store all the time, telling me that it needed to be brought home and loved, she always knew exactly what they needed. And who am I to argue? So they always came home and flourished under our care.

"I like plants," I explained.

A wistful smiled stretched across his face and I grazed my hand up his arm so I could see what was going through his mind. The giggles of a young boy hiding among plants, the smell of the flowers around me, a womans voice pretending she didn't know where her son had gone.

"Growing up my mom always had a garden outside, used to spend hours out there."

"So what makes this chaotic?"

His smile faltered as he looked down to his plate, "just been a long time, and she never had them inside."

I pulled my hand away from him when I heard a man shouting in my head. We made some light small talk as we ate our breakfast until Billy put his empty plate down and jumped off the counter.

"Well..I should get ready to hit the gym, gotta meet Steve before he goes to work. Thanks for breakfast."

Olivia appeared just behind his shoulder, her long fingers brushing through his hair, "so pretty," she cooed, "have one, sweet boy."

I watched Billy, expecting a reaction but he didn't move, he couldn't feel her there. Of course he couldn't, I'm hallucinating.

"Do you want one?" I blurted out, "a plant?"

He looked confused for a moment, "what?"

"A plant, do you want one? Little neighborly present?"

He squinted at me before slowly nodding, "sure?"

Olivia beamed, slowly walked to one of my windows and pointed at a cactus with a little yellow flower on the top. I went over, grabbed it and offered it to Billy.

"How about this one? It's really easy to take care of, just put it in a warm window and give it a little bit of water every now and again."

He regarded me softly, reached out and took the little plant from me, "thanks."

-- 2 weeks later

"Jesus, Elle, what are you doing?"

It's late at night again, I think Elle likes me being sleep deprived since she usually shows up when I should be sleeping. Right now, she was stretched out across my bed, only in a grey bra and panties. The black bruise on her chest was a stark contrast against her skin.

"Come to bed, Baby," she urged, her hand trailing down her chest.

I huffed, running my hand over my face, "why am I hallucinating this?"

She got up and stepped in front of me, grabbed my hand to place it on her icy hip, "I'm real, Katie."

"No!" I yelled, backing away from her, "you're not! You're dead and I'm...I'm fucking crazy and torturing myself!"

I stepped out of her reach, not listening to her calls as I stormed out of my apartment. Instead, I went to a club and found a pretty girl with drugs who took me home with her. We tangled in her bed, moaning and high for two days until her boyfriend called. He was on his way home and I had to hurry to gather my stuff and stumble back to my apartment.

@charmed-asylum @champagnesugamama

[twdfanfic-multifandom]

“I’ve had worse scratches from my sister’s kitten”

*Set between season 3 and season 4*

****

"Can I slide in a small request?" Michonne said quietly, her face stern. You turned to look at her, eyebrows furrowed.

"What is it?"

A moment of hesitation passed before Michonne finally spoke, the seriousness of her voice making you slightly nervous.

"Snickers. Kit-Kat. Butterfinger, whatever you can find. Please. I'm begging you." Desperation filled her voice as if her life depended on her single request for a candy bar. A laugh bubbled from your lips as you shook your head.

"I'll try my best, though I can't guarantee its freshness," you stated as you made a mental note to look for any form of chocolate on your supply run.

"As long as it has sugar and has more than a hundred calories, I don't care if it's decades old," Michonne retorted and offered you a small smile.

"Be safe," she instructed finally before turning away from you.

Daryl leaned against the car with arms crossed, waiting patiently for you. Tyreese already had the engine running, and soon the three of you were exiting the prison grounds. The sun was fresh and sharp having just risen, and the blinding golden rays streamed through the windows. From the backseat, you watched as golden strips of light cut across Daryl's skin, almost making him glow. He looked beautiful. He absentmindedly chewed on a fingernail while he and Tyreese exchanged quiet conversation.

An aura of tiredness filled the car. It was early, and runs weren't a fun part of surviving - though they were necessary. The prison ran out of food quickly despite the rationing, so scavenging for supplies became more frequent. Most of the time it was you and Daryl out hunting for food. The two of you worked exceptionally well together - your bubbly yet sarcastic disposition paired well with his hostility and dryness, and you found yourself enjoying time with Daryl. He was cold and stern, but beneath the tough exterior was a heart of gold. You'd clearly seen that throughout the months. This was occasionally reinforced by meaningful conversations shared between the two of you on late night watches, or laying beside a fire in the woods. He was a good person.

"Y/n, you still awake?" Tyreese said loudly, making you wince.

"Am now, asshole," you joked with a small chuckle, and Daryl glanced at you out the corner of his eye, his lip tugged up at the corner.

After a few more minutes, the entered into a desolate town and the three of you stepped out, weapons ready. Everything looked ransacked. Windows were smashed in, and walls were covered in graffiti. The end is here. Repent and get saved. They're coming. We're all dead. You're dead.

A small chill ran down your spine, and the two men also seemed unsettled by the writing on the wall. It was hard to get used to things like that. It added to the feeling of impending doom that always seem to loom at the back of everyone's minds. Walkers snarled in the distance. None of them seemed nearby, but everyone knew it was best to get in and get out before they became a problem.

"There," Tyreese pointed out a large building with a faded sign - what once was presumably a Walmart. Quickening up the pace, you headed into the building.

Daryl stepped protectively in front of you, crossbow raised. He scanned the massive room before walking forward towards the shelves.

"Let's split up," you suggested in a whisper. The large man nodded before Daryl interjected.

"No, no way. Ya stick with me," he instructed, making you roll your eyes despite the warmth that filled your heart.

"I can fight. It'll be quicker if we split up," you motioned to your gun and knife.

"She's right," Tyreese agreed, earning a glare from the archer. After a moment he reluctantly agreed, and we went different ways.

The shelves were not entirely empty, but most of the canned goods were gone. The only things left were the things most people didn't want to eat - beans, tuna, clams, vienna sausage. You placed the available tins in your backpack before heading to the candy aisle. Your heart sunk when you saw that it was totally barren. All the racks were empty, save for a single bag of marshmallows that had been ripped open and spilled all over. Defeated, you dropped to your knees.

"Why the candy?" You muttered bitterly to yourself, letting out a huge sigh.

"Ya say something?" Daryl called out from somewhere else in the store, and you shook your head stupidly before realizing that he couldn't see you.

"Just talking to myself," you called back. In a last effort, you bent down to scan the deep dark depths beneath the metal shelving. Shining you flashlight underneath, all there was to be seen was an ungodly amount of spiderwebs and dust. Then something glinted in the artificial light. Desperately you crawled forward to reach for the shining object. With a crinkle, you pulled out the dusty bar. Baby Ruth. Hell yeah. A big smile plastered onto your face and you pocketed the candy bar - Michonne was going to be happy. She hadn't asked for anything since arriving at the prison. All she did was help out as much as she could and stayed out of the way. The two of you had become close friends in the short time that Michonne had been at the prison, but it might as well have been years of friendship. It sure as hell felt that way sometimes.

"Guys we got company!" Tyreese yelled, snapping you out of your daze. Raising your gun you shot up off the floor and headed towards the sound of his voice, now noticing hungry growls.

"Holy shit."

A steady stream of walkers flowed through the single open door of the Walmart, while dozens more were pressed against the large window panes, blocking your exit. Arrows fired from beside you, and you glanced at Daryl. He was focused. You and Tyreese followed suit, firing your guns at the grotesque and hungry walkers. Their jaws snapped loudly. With a sudden shatter, one of the large window panes gave in under the pressure of the walkers, allowing them entrance.

"Shit," Daryl muttered. Fear pulsed through you as you kept firing, though it seemed pointless. The unmistakable click of an empty mag sent frustration coursing through your head. You flung your gun towards a biter with only half a face, then pulled out your knife. Rushing forward into the oncoming creatures, you stabbed them relentlessly in their decaying heads, one by one.

"We gotta go," Tyreese said breathlessly as he motioned towards the rest of the building. There had to be another exit. You nodded as you turned away from the creatures and hurried towards Daryl, who placed a warm hand on your arm.

"Ya okay?" He asked quietly, his low voice rumbling through your chest. His eyes were simultaneously cold and warm, paradoxical like him. Soft and hard. Cold and warm. Where his fingers touched your skin sent waves of electricity through your body, making your stomach tighten.

"Yeah," you breathed softly, your eyes staring straight into his.

"Seriously guys, not the time. We gotta go now."

With the moment broken, the three of you ran through the array of shelves. In the distance was another loud shatter. Then another. Then another. No more glass. Panic rose in your chest along with the increasing sense of urgency. They were coming, fast. Tyreese fired his last few rounds at the herd of walkers that just rounded the corner, and Daryl continued to fire his arrows - which would eventually run out.

"Tyreese, find the exit. We'll hold them off," you barked as you stabbed your blade through a half-exposed temple. The man paused for a moment, contemplating arguing, then nodded and headed out of sight. One particularly gross walker had been split up the torso, and its bowels hung out of it like putrid sausage. Its jaw hung limply from its rotting face, tongue lolling out like a smelling slab of meat. Bile rose in your throat and you shut your eyes.

It was a stupid thing to do.

Suddenly you were down on the ground. Fingers clawed at your ankle and a new set of nails clawed at your stomach, ripping open your skin. A small scream erupted from you as you shoved your arm forward, blocking the thing from chewing your face. A series of other pains burned their way onto your body like fire, and tears streamed down your face.

The walker by your face suddenly stilled, as did the other ones surrounding you. In one swift motion, Daryl pulled you up into his arms and sped towards a small, dingy bathroom. The fear in his eyes seemed to scare you more than the intensity of the situation.

He threw down his crossbow and instantly surveyed your wounds, paying attention the scratches on your abdomen. Blood seeped out of the slits and onto the beige tiled floor, making you feel slightly sick.

"Shit, y/n," Daryl's voice was laced with panic. His hands pressed against the wounds to stop the bleeding.

"It's not so bad. I've had worse scratches from my sister's kitten," you joked, though your attempt at humor failed miserably. Anger flashed across the man's face.

"This ain't a joke, y/n!" He yelled, making you flinch. Black spots danced into your vision and you shook your head slightly. It only made you more dizzy.

"You're right. The joke is you focusing on the scratches," you said lazily, staring into Daryl's fearful eyes. A puzzled expression crossed his face. Sighing, you pulled yourself into a half-sitting position before pulling off your tattered shirt. Daryl blushed heavily before turning to a deathly pale shade when he spotted the fresh bite in the side of your torso.

"No, no, no. No," he said repeatedly, his hands suddenly by the bite as if he could heal it. he couldn't. His head shook repeatedly, shaking free a few teardrops which spilled onto your blood-soaked skin.

"'S okay, Daryl," you said softly, gently placing your hand on his warm arm. Death was inevitable. Everyone knew that.

"Don't you dare say that," Daryl growled.

"It really is, it's okay. I'm not afraid of dying," you reassured him, though it was a lie. Everyone is afraid of dying. Especially when they have to die in front of the person they loved.

"Ya ain't gonna die. I'm not lettin' that happen. Ya gonna be fine, y/n. Ya gonna be fine," the archer's voice was now thick, choked by tears. Your own tears spilled onto your face as you watched him stare helplessly at your dying body.

"Don't let me turn."

Daryl looked at you, and for the first time you saw that he was broken. His mouth was turned down at the corners, and tears spilled down his cheeks in a steady flow, hair covering his face. Your hand found his blood-covered one as you passed him the Baby Ruth bar, also covered in blood. Your blood.

"Please give this to Michonne," you whispered and your eyes slowly fluttered shut. You were tired.

"Open ya eyes, y/n. Stay with me. Stay awake," Daryl pleaded as he gripped your hand, his other hand on your overheating face. It was now a battle whether you would die from blood loss or from the infection. This was one competition that you wished neither would win.

"I'm just tired," your voice was barely audible, sending blind fear through Daryl's body.

He never got close because he knew this day would come, but now it was here, he wish he did. He wished he'd told you how he felt. He wished he'd spent every single waking second with you, rather than attempt to distance himself. But now it didn't matter, because you were dying and it hurt all the same. God, how it hurt.

"Stay with me," Daryl pleaded finally, before he did it. Heart beating so fast he thought it would explode, Daryl place both hands on the side of your face and gently placed his lips against yours. All the times he wanted tell you how he felt, all the times you'd shared watching the stars, all the moments of ineffable feelings between the two of you filled that single kiss. His lips against yours felt like his heart growing warm and his heart shattering at the same time. It was warm because he loved you. It shattered because he knew that he would never be able to kiss you again. He would never be able to have more moments with you.

"Finally," you muttered weakly when you broke apart. Your heart would have been beating fast if it weren't pumping slowly and thickly from blood loss. New tears lined your face as you stared into Daryl's swollen eyes. Your heart broke at the sight.

"'S okay, D."

He shook his head and squeezed his eyes shut, placing his forehead against yours. He felt your warm, slow breaths against his face. The words were about to leave his lips; those three words that he'd been itching to say for the longest time. But then he realized it didn't matter anymore, because he no longer felt your breaths on his face. They had stopped. You were gone.

[theparanormalperiodical]

The Thornton Heath Poltergeist - The Most Haunted Places In The World That You NEED To Hear About #2

January.

A time of self doubt as you take on the latest fad diet. A time of personal struggle as you return to the 9-to-5 and question why in the hell you decided to work in this goddamn office. And a time of thirst as you realise Dry January does indeed include Echo Falls despite their Rosé being mostly sugar and aesthetic.

Is there any hope left in the world?

Oh, dear reader - you didn’t tap on this blog in the hope of reading some article about a cheerful, positive topic like little rabbits with big flopsy ears, did you?

You’re here for the dead. And the demonic. And all manner of terrible things. 

Goodbye, Patches - hello, Poltergeist.

Today, we are going to be discussing one of the most iconic paranormal cases from the UK that no one has ever heard of: the Thornton Heath Poltergeist. 

But it turns out that there’s not just one poltergeist in Thornton Heath. 

Oh, no. 

There’s two. 

And these two pesky spirits are far from alone:

Croydon might not sound like the setting for the next cult horror hit, but this London borough is actually known for its rather macabre history - and the legacy of its dark past.

Whilst your chowing down on a Gregg’s sausage roll you might hear rumours of one of Elizabeth I’s maids-in-waiting traipsing around a school, and perhaps you’ll even see a few children who were killed during the war skip past the local Chicken Cottage.

On top of that - like most areas of London - Croydon is actually a relatively ancient town, with the first settlements appearing in the 6th century. 

This place clearly has a lot of paranormal promise.

However, despite setting the scene for 2 key cases of poltergeist activity, though do appear to be unconnected. Nevertheless, together they provide a lot of insight into a specific form of supernatural activity that tends to get forgotten.

This is especially true since poltergeists have dominated the horror genre for many a year, inspiring iconic films such as Poltergeist (1982), and litter stories which involve any trace paranormal activity.

The thing is, although frequently mentioned, the actual concept of poltergeists is kind of ignored, particularly the debate surrounding them. These 2 cases, however, provide an overview of the different approaches to poltergeist activity:

One case looks into debunking the paranormal, whereas the other presents the typical haunted house case you clicked to see. 

So, today’s article is going to take us through the 2 poltergeists of Thornton Heath, and the paranormal theory behind poltergeists. 

Strap in folks, and let’s get spooky.

First, What Actually Is A Poltergeist?

Anyone speak German?

Poltergeist is a mashup of two German words, and it literally means “noisy spirit”.

Based on that translation, it is a type of spirit who has a thing for physical disturbances. Loud noises, objects moving, biting and pinching are the common symptoms of such a haunting. And despite sounding pretty minimal - well, maybe not the biting and the pinching - such poltergeist activity often represents the first traces of far greater hauntings. 

But unlike most paranormal theories, it turns out that poltergeist activity is pretty well investigated (as this post will demonstrate). 

Heck, poltergeist activity has been reported since the 1st century!

It is claimed that it lasts typically around 5 months, but some say it can stretch out to several years.

On top of our knowledge of the duration of such activity, poltergeists allegedly haunt people, not places - a bit like demons. This does contrast with the 1972 haunting, but we all know that supernatural theories lack the accuracy we expect of an exact science.

And so we come back to the debates and the debunking which always ends up stalking the supernatural. It’s for that reason that Poltergeists are such a valuable component of spiritualist theory because of the intense debate and study surrounding them, as the 1938 case will show. 

Indeed, the first of the scientific theories debunking poltergeists swap the paranormal for the patriarchy.

It's called the Naughty Little Girl theory.

Obviously, it suggests that young girls create activity to get attention because women can’t breathe without doing it for attention, right? The Conjuring 2 is one of the few films that picks up on this concept, showing its use by the media as it was utilised in the real life case.

A less misogynistic theory instead claims that the paranormal activity could be down to seismic activity or water stress, creating noises and physical disturbances often blamed on poltergeists.

Or, it could all come back to the theory of psychokinesis:

It claims that when we are stressed, our fucked-up brains can have a physical impact on the objects around us, making it look - and feel - like we are living in a perpetual Paranormal Activity film. 

Well, that or a rom-com; it turns out the poltergeist was really within us the whole time...

The 1972 Case - The Official Thornton Heath Poltergeist 

Welcome to the the era of the occult - the 1970s. 

The obsession with the paranormal experienced a revival in the late 20th century thanks to the affectionately named Satanic Panic and the rise of hippie-dom. And because so many reports of the paranormal crop up in this era, we have to be wary – blaming shit on the paranormal was nearly as common as institutionalised racism, ensuring that claims were often amped up by fear.

Got your pinch of salt to hand? Good. 

Our story begins in the heat of summer - it’s August 1972. 

A family are fast asleep after, well, I don’t know, what did people do in the 1970s? Listen to too much ABBA? 

Anyway - their peaceful slumber is interrupted in the middle of the night when a radio switches on all by itself and blasts out full-volume-raise-the-roof level musings from a foreign radio station.

This is where the activity begins. 

The following nights, lights turn on and off by themselves, mirroring the first hour of a Paranormal Activity film before Katie makes some off the cuff comment about being besties with a demon during puberty. 

Yet despite the suggestions of something supernatural, it suddenly just chills the fuck out. 

Well, that is until the most wonderful time of the year! Only for this famalam, this are about to get a little less wonderful, and a little more what the fuck. 

Probably in the midst of an ABBA jam-sesh, a small antique figurine is plucked off a shelf by an invisible hand, and flung across the room, hitting the patriarch of the family with such a force that it knocks him to the floor. 

If that wasn’t enough for one day, the Christmas tree then joins in the freaky festivities, and starts shaking.

And that only just scratches the surface of the supernatural events soon to haunt this family.

Cut to a few days later, and its New Year Eve.

Ok, right, let’s be honest here: any activity reported was at times when there would have been a couple of bevvies, a few late nights among friends and family… 

Who hasn’t seen a demon picking cashews out of the mixed nuts bowel when they’re a third of the way through that bottle of Echo Falls?

Regardless of my suspicions, they supposedly started to hear loud footsteps upstairs, and during that very night, a member of the family awoke to see a very tall and very angry man staring at him, giving off very threatening vibes.

But it wasn’t just the son of the family that saw these mysterious goings on.

Some visitors to the house reported similar activity:

At a dinner party (*sigh*) a door began to violently shake, nearly coming off its hinges. The living room door then followed suit, and swung open. Every single light in the house then began to follow the trend and turned on and off.

No matter how many bottles they were deep by then, there’s no doubt that shizz was getting weird. 

In response to this shizz getting weird, the family did the right thing: they called themselves a priest, and got him to check the shizz out. 

However, as a result of his holy presence, the activity worsened. A medium shortly followed, and on his visit deduced that this was a farmer of Chatterton. A quick visit to the library and a rifle through the odd archive later, and the story is confirmed:

This was the spirit of a farmer from the 18th century, and as the medium claimed, he was angry that these trespassers were on his land. So, like all landlords, he kept his cool and was trying to treat these people with the fairness and respect that all landlords hold dear.

Nah, who are we kidding - instead of charging them £60 for not pulling a weed out from underneath the wheelie bin, he manifested as a poltergeist.

The escalation then, uh, escalated.

Following the appearance of the ghost patriarch, his wife then turned up and made a point of targeting the matriarch of the family. 

Despite the coincidence of most claims of boozy nights on the heath, these hauntings that mirror the heads of the household really support the case as it sticks to this line of opposition to the “intruders”.

The ghostly matriarch’s favoured haunting was following people up the stairs; when you turned around, you would see wisps of a grey bun and the outlines of a faint figure which would then vanish into thin air. 

But on top of the wife getting involved, the farmer himself made a commitment to being spooky AF.

Its for that reason that the creepiest haunting of the year award goes to the farmer. 

Why?

Because he would turn up on their TV. 

Like, I don’t know if he was on bloody Blue Peter à la IT, or if the screen would go blank and this bitch would rock up and just be there…

But just like fuck that, no thanks, congratulations, and just take the award ugh.

So, like anyone would, this family were like nope screw this, packed up shop, and moved the fuck outta there. After they moved out the activity ceased - like all hauntings tend to do, confirming that it could be due to their trespassing. 

Well, or that it was all faked but as the gullible young woman I am, I’m going to deny all traces of this family’s excessive drinking and say that the farmer did indeed turn up on Blue Peter and take a badge with him to the afterlife.

For privacy reasons, the actual address is unknown to the public for the obvious reason that innocent families don’t want some Jake Paul wannabe pulling up in a jacked up Ford Fiesta and whipping out a GoPro to make a quick buck on YouTube.

Heck, I don’t know if anyone lives there now! But this is still recognised by paranormal fanatics are one of the greatest hauntings to come out of the UK. 

Well, I say the greatest…

It has to compete with the Thornton Heath poltergeist of an odd 40 years before.

The 1938 Case - Thornton Heath Poltergeist 2: The Prequel No One Asked For

Now we turn to the former haunting of Thornton heath in 1938.

But this poltergeist isn’t set against the scene of some cosy pre-war family home, nor are any long dead farmers getting involved. 

This story, on the other hand, follows the scientific study of the paranormal, and to this day is an unsolved mystery that has left both investigator and individual alike without answers.

And it starts with this bloke called Nandor Fodor.

Fodor lead the argument that poltergeists are manifestations from the subconscious mind, and to prove his claims, he investigated the tales of terror that had been experienced by one woman in a small corner of Croydon.

He followed his scientific studies all the way to a little place called Thornton Heath. 

Sure, this case could have been linked to the Chatterton farmer, but the focus of their investigation was on the nature of paranormal beliefs, so there was no study of what spirit could be behind it. 

All we know regarding the haunting is that the victim of this poltergeist was a woman only known to us as Mrs. Forbes. She was studied at an institute, and in an attempt to be sure she wasn’t creating the hauntings, she basically had to get undressed in front of them, and wear special clothes to prove she wasn’t concealing anything. 

Nevertheless, the weird shizz we saw in the 1970s still seemed to follow her.

Dishes would float in mid-air and then crash to the floor, glasses would suddenly appear in her hand (*insert middle aged facebook meme with a minion in the background*), and objects from her home would appear at the institute.

Her house was 10 miles away from the institute. 

But beyond her possessions appearing out of thin air,  Mrs. Forbes frequently described different entities that would appear and attack her.

These beings included a vampire which would on occasion bite her neck - and left her with two physical wounds in her neck, and a tiger which reached out and scratched deep gashes in her arm. Just like the vampire’s supposed attack, these markings were also found on her body.

However, one of her claims went too far, and was used to challenge every single incident she claimed was caused by a poltergeist:

Alongside the vampire bite and the tiger’s scratches, Mrs. Forbes also had several burn marks scarring her neck. Seemingly coming out of nowhere, Forbes believed it was due to the spirit of a man strangling her with a necklace. 

However, shortly after making this statement, she professed a deep desire to kill this man. 

Fodor drew from this that she thought the man was inside of her, and thus she tried to kill him by choking herself. That’s the burn marks explained - what about everything else? All it took was a quick check of her body and clothing to find small items concealed under her left breast.

That’s right; she has conjured up this “poltergeist” out of thin air.  

Having connected the dots, Fodor deduced that she was both schizophrenic, and burdened by repressed sexual trauma. 

Another day, another hoax.

Unsurprisingly, faked activity vis-a-vis this case is pretty common when it comes to the paranormal, and this label is pinned by non-believers onto, well, basically anything we just so happen to report. 

And despite how frustrating this can seem, it is a necessary disturbance in our research of the supernatural. In fact, the original Thornton Heath story brings this into play when we discuss poltergeists, particularly as their basis centres on physical disturbances which can be both faked or misinterpreted.

Croydon might seem yet another area of London Prince Andrew would pull out of the hat to defend his reputation, but it instead represents a much wider discussion of the paranormal.

From the fake to the unknown, from the mysterious to the mentally unstable:

How we investigate the supernatural starts in a little place called Thornton Heath.

What do you think?

Did the family really witness poltergeist activity first hand?

Or was it all just conjured up by women that purely wanted attention i dont know about you but i just love attention oh gimme attention look I WANT ATTENTION NOWSUFH[HB’[Egb’???????!1//1/1/1!//????

Ahem.

Wanna hear about more spooky shizz like this? Wanna hear about a new haunted location everyday? Then go ‘head and hit follow!

[eddie-boii]

Never Let You Go (part 6/14)

Fic info: Both Eddie and Stan live because I do what I want. Multichapter.

Rating: Teen and up (may change). Language.

Pairings: Reddie, Benverly.

Ao3 link: here

Summary: The Losers prepare for a wedding. Ben’s bachelor party. 

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14

*

“Beer?”

Eddie accepted the bottle Ben handed to him and quickly checked the ingredients and alcohol percentage as Ben handed out the rest to the others.

“Thanks, man, but I think I’m gonna cut back on the alcohol intake,” said Richie, and Eddie looked over at him in surprise; Richie was never usually one to decline alcohol no matter how much Eddie pestered him about the state of his liver.

“We’ve got lemonade?” Ben offered.

“That’ll do.”

Richie accepted the glass and leaned back in the deck chair, eyes closed contentedly, his long legs stretched out in front of him and the beams of sunlight that filtered through the wooden planks from the balcony above lighting up strands of his dark hair in streams of gold. Eddie caught himself staring and looked away quickly, accidentally making direct eye contact with Stanley who just rolled his eyes. Eddie scowled at him in return.

Ben’s bachelor party was far more subdued than Bev’s; just the guys hanging out on the back porch of Ben’s frankly massive house, watching fall leaves drift down onto the garden, their warm hues lighting up in the glow from the afternoon sun. Warmth still lingered from summer but it wasn’t sweltering, and the Losers - minus Bev - were able to lounge around in light jackets while Ben grilled burgers and hotdogs on the barbecue, the smell of charcoal mingling pleasantly with the sweet scent of the fall air.

“You know shoes were invented for a reason,” said Eddie, grimacing as Ben accidentally dropped a scolding hot sausage onto his bare foot for the second time.

“If you say that again, I’m feeding you the floor hotdogs,” said Ben. “Shoes are restrictive.”

“Also protective.”

“Those floor hotdogs sure have a lot of germs on them, Eddie. You know this is where Ember does her morning piddles.”

Eddie nearly gagged. “And you’re walking barefoot there?!”

“I pressure wash it.” Ben lifted his foot and tried to stick it in Eddie’s face. “My feet are super clean. Here, smell them.”

“I’m not sniffing your fucking foot.”

“Lick it, Eds,” said Richie. “Once in a lifetime opportunity.”

“You are both fucking disgusting,” said Eddie, shoving Ben’s foot out of the way which threw him off balance and straight into Mike’s lap.

“Christ, man, are you sure you lost weight?” Mike groaned. “I think you just broke both my legs.”

“He replaced it all with muscle,” said Stanley, leaning forward to squeeze Ben’s bicep.

“Ooh, if he gets a squeeze,” said Richie, leaning forward too.

“Nope, nope, nope, we are not doing this again,” said Ben, extracting himself from Mike’s lap. “I have burgers to cook and bicep-squeezing privileges are for Bev’s hands alone.”

“Lucky lady,” said Richie with a wink, and Eddie tried not to let his jealousy show.

“So, guys, is anyone going to tell me what actually happened last night?” said Ben. “Bev refuses to say anything.”

Eddie sank down in his chair a little, hiding his face behind the beer bottle so no one could see how red it had gotten. Richie, on the other hand, didn’t seem at all ashamed.

“Let’s see, we got drunk, hired a stripper-”

“A stripper?” Ben squawked.

“Not as hot as you, don’t worry,” said Richie, winking again. “Got more drunk, played some party games, Eddie apparently decided to fuck off and clean my house-”

“It was fucking disgusting,” Eddie protested.

“He’s always been like that,” Bill snorted. “R-remember when we all had that sleepover at mine when we were like twelve and ss-stole my mom’s chardonnay and he ended up downstairs doing laundry?”

“Oh shit, that’s right!” cried Stan, grinning gleefully. “And your mom’s face when she came home and we were all throwing up but she didn’t even get mad coz the house was so clean!”

“Drunken housemaid, that’s our Eds,” said Richie, grinning over at Eddie fondly.

“Don’t call me Eds,” Eddie grumbled, sinking lower in his chair.

“So what happened after?” said Ben, smiling warmly at his friends’ stories as he piled burgers and hotdogs into buns and passed them out on paper plates.

“Then Richie got super friendly,” said Mike.

“I cannot be held responsible for what I did when drunk!” Richie protested, mouth full of burger. God help him, Eddie even found him cute with food spilling out of his mouth.

“What did he do?” said Ben, grinning already in anticipation.

“Only tried to make out with literally everyone there,” said Stanley.

“Did he now?” said Ben, grinning even harder. “I hope you’re not trying to steal my fiance.”

“She wasn’t into it,” Richie pouted. “But if you’re feeling left out, Benny-boy…”

Richie lunged towards Ben who managed to block him just in time, holding him away with ease and laughing as Richie made kissy noises and grabby hands at him.

“Ok, ok, you can kiss my cheek,” said Ben when Richie didn’t relent. Ben turned his cheek towards him and Richie leaned in but grabbed his face at the last minute and smashed their mouths together.

“Success!” cried Richie, pulling back and raising his hands in victory while Ben wiped his mouth and tried to stop laughing. “I have now made out with every Loser!”

“You d-d-didn’t use tongue with him, it doesn’t count,” said Bill.

“Don’t you dare,” said Ben, holding his hands out in front of him defensively when Richie looked like he was about to try again. “We’ll say it counts.”

Richie held up his hands in surrender and finally sat back down. “Whatever you say, Benny-boo.”

“You know how fucking revolting that is right?” said Eddie. “You know how many diseases pass via saliva? You could get mono, you know?”

“What’s the matter, Eddie-spaghetti, are you jealous?” said Richie, turning to grin at him obnoxiously.

“No, I’m not fucking jealous,” said Eddie which was a huge fucking lie.

“You know you’re still my number one guy, Eddie Bear,” Richie cooed, pinching Eddie’s cheek until Eddie swatted his hand away. “Well, right after your mom.”

“I hate you.”

“If that’s what you wanna call it,” coughed Stan and Eddie glared at him.

By the time everyone had eaten enough food to last them the whole winter, the sun was dipping low in the sky and the air had gained a chill more reminiscent of fall, so the Losers packed up the deck chairs and headed indoors to lounge on the stylish but comfortable couches and snoop through Ben’s things.

“Holy shit, you have all my shows on DVD?” said Richie from where he was sat cross-legged on the floor, eying up Ben’s impressive film collection as Ember snoozed in his lap, something that Eddie found revoltingly cute. “Didn’t know you were such a fan.”

“They’re Bev’s, actually,” said Ben. “From back before we all remembered. She said she never actually watched them but bought them all anyway coz she just liked having them.”

“Huh, that’s so weird,” said Richie, smiling slightly as he brushed his fingers over the plastic covers of the selection.

“I’ve seen them all,” said Eddie before thinking, and Richie looked sharply up at him, eyes wide.

“You have?” he said, his mouth splitting into a very egotistical grin

“Fucking hated them,” said Eddie, which wiped the grin straight off Richie’s face. “Your jokes never felt right. Guess subconsciously I just knew they didn’t sound like yours.”

“But you still watched them all?” commented Stanley.

Eddie shot him a look to tell him to shut his mouth, then shrugged. “I don’t know, I guess some part of me just…”

“Missed me?” Richie finished, that shit-eating grin back on his face.

“Yeah, whatever, dickwad,” said Eddie. “Myra fucking hated you, for the record.”

Richie gasped dramatically. “How could she? The love of my life!”

“I thought Eddie’s mm-mom was the love of your life,” said Bill.

“Same thing.”

Eddie threw a cushion at him and Richie batted it away before it hit the dog.

“You know, I went to one of your shh-sh-shows once,” said Bill as if only just remembering. “Friend of mine d-dragged me to it.”

“Did you at least like it, Big Bill?” said Richie as he put on his most exaggerated puppy dog face.

“As much as you liked the endings of my books,” said Bill, and Richie pouted, affronted. “Nothing beats real Rich’s jokes,” Bill added, which seemed to cheer Richie up.

“Don’t inflate his ego,” said Stanley, rolling his eyes. “He’ll never shut up now.”

“You know you love me, Stan-the-man.”

“So you read Bill’s books?” Ben asked Richie. “Before we remembered?”

“Oh yeah. Got the whole set back home,” said Richie.

“I went to a signing once,” said Stanley, and Bill looked over at him in surprise. “It was like your first book and I had no idea who you were, but you were in town so I went. Had no idea why, but-”

“Part of you knew,” finished Mike. “I went to one of those book signings too.”

It was Mike’s turn to be stared at.

“Yy-you did?” said Bill.

“Couldn’t stay long or I’d start forgetting, but yeah, man,” said Mike. “You were in Maine and I couldn’t resist.”

“But I wouldn’t have-” said Bill. “I didn’t recognise you.”

“No,” said Mike. “But it’s fine, man. You all remember now, that’s what matters.”

“But you could remember the whole time,” said Ben.

“That really must have sucked, man,” said Richie.

Mike shrugged, looking a little self-conscious. “I mean… Yeah. At first, when you’d just moved out and you never replied to any of my letters, I thought… I thought maybe you just didn’t wanna talk to me anymore.”

“Shit, man,” said Bill, reaching out to squeeze Mike’s hand. “You know we would never…”

“Yeah, I know,” said Mike. “I know you guys aren’t like that. That’s when I figured it had to have something to do with It.”

“You were still all alone,” Eddie said, almost a whisper. He couldn’t imagine what it would be like if he remembered the Losers while they couldn’t remember him, if they were out there living their lives while he was stuck at home with his mother, never responding to messages or calls. If he saw them in person only to be met with irrecognition, their eyes passing over him blankly as though he were just another stranger. And, god, if Richie ever looked at him like that...

“It wasn’t so bad,” said Mike, smiling at them all in a clear attempt to be reassuring. “I kept track of you, watched your careers grow. I was so proud of you all… I’m glad I can tell you that now. I love you guys.”

“You better shut up before Richie starts crying,” said Stanley who seemed to be the one actually close to tears. He smiled at Mike. “Love you too, man.”

“Yeah, thanks for dragging us all back to that shithole,” said Richie, “or we wouldn’t be here now.”

“I wouldn’t be getting married,” said Ben.

“I wouldn’t be divorced,” said Eddie. “That’s a good thing,” he added when Mike looked concerned.

“You mm-made me have to go back to speech therapy,” said Bill teasingly before nudging Mike with his shoulder and squeezing his hand again. “But it’s all worth it.”

“Gay,” said Richie.

“Aaand you ruined the moment,” said Eddie.

“Glad I could be of service.”

“God, how did we survive without each other?” said Ben. 

“Barely,” said Stan quietly, tugging down his sleeves a little.

The others fell silent for a time until Richie, being Richie, decided to lighten the mood.

“I’m thinking of getting a dog!” he said a little too brightly as he scratched Ember behind the ears. He grinned up at Eddie. “A little pomeranian called Penny. What do you think, Eds?”

“I am terminating our friendship effective immediately,” said Eddie, and just like that, the shadow that had fallen over them was lifted.

Ben lit a fire in the hearth and they all lounged around it, basking in the warm glow as they fell back into easy conversation. Ember migrated to Eddie’s lap which he was very smug about until Richie squeezed up next to him to be able to pet the dog, but Eddie was secretly quite content with a dog on his lap and Richie at his side, like something out of one of his more domestic fantasies.

Bill told ghost stories somehow scarier than their experience with Pennywise, and Stan calmed them all down afterwards by rambling about types of birds, which everyone paid rapt attention to because Stan talking about his favourite thing, his face lit up and hands waving around excitedly, was a joy to watch even if no one else cared all that much about the topic. 

Later on, Ben showed them all an old photo album he’d found at his parents’ house of them all as kids, and Mike pointed to the odd picture and excitedly reminded them all about the time they all dressed as each other for Halloween, or the time Richie got suspended for filling a kid’s locker with shaving foam for picking on Eddie, or the time they all went as each other’s dates to Homecoming and tried to dance all together in one chaotic circle.

The fire was warm, and the beer seeped into Eddie’s limbs and made him drowsy, his eyes slipping shut as he listened to Richie and Stanley argue over who had the better homecoming outfit. The next thing he knew, he was waking up in the middle of the night half-draped across Richie with his face buried in his chest, Ember curled up in the small space between them, Mike leaning against his shoulder with Ben against his, and Bill propped up against his legs with Stan’s head in his lap, all fast asleep. He’d fallen asleep with his phone in his hand, and when he checked it, he found a text from Bev who must have come home while they were all sleeping, for it showed a picture of them all cuddled up to one another fast asleep on the couch. He would have been annoyed, but he had to admit it was kind of cute.

[11:25pm] Queen B: [image.jpg]

[11:25pm] Queen B: My boys <333

Eddie smiled slightly and saved the photo to his camera roll, then let his head fall back against Richie’s warm chest, not really caring that the fabric of his shirt scratched his cheek or that no one had brushed their teeth. This was a night for the Losers.

*

Previous Next

[elisaphoenix13]

Flirting and Gossip

It was early morning, so Tony wouldn't be up for another couple of hours, and it was summer break for Peter so he probably wouldn't be up until noon at the latest. Stephen cherished mornings like these. He could drink his tea, read in actual silence, and properly meditate without having to go to the Sanctum or Kamar-Taj.

He promised to take Peter to Nepal after some begging and puppy eyes the sorcerer couldn't say no to. He was an excitable kid but Stephen knew he would be as respectable as possible and stay out of the way of training sorcerers. If he needed to, he could probably distract Peter with the wi-fi while he worked with the more advanced students.

The rattle of the fridge opening startles Stephen from his thoughts, and surprise is evident on his face when he looks over his shoulder to see someone digging through its contents.

"Peter?"

Scott moves away with a capri-sun and closes the door. "Nope."

"What are you doing here Lang?"

"Getting my morning juice box."

Stephen scowls. "I thought I told you to stop drinking Peter's juice."

"I said I'll stop when Tony stops buying it."

The sorcerer closes his book with a heavy sigh when Scott sits across from him. "Why do I feel like you want something?"

"I wanted juice."

"You have it." Stephen deadpans. 

Scott shrugs. "Maybe I want to hang out with you."

"So much for my quiet morning."

Stephen stands up and walks over to the fridge to pull out some things for breakfast, and his eyes twitches when Scott slurps his juice noisily. He didn't react though, that was what Scott wanted and he wasn't going to give him that kind of power. Not that it was really much power in the first place.

He was also very aware of Scott's unwanted growing attraction to him. What used to be harmless compliments was turning into obvious eyeballing, and Tony, the unhelpful bastard, thought the whole thing was hilarious. Stephen was almost tempted to let Scott do something just to get the billionaire to take it seriously. Almost.

"Sausage or bacon?"

"Depends on who it's for."

Before he can roll his eyes, an audible thwap sounds and Stephen turns just as Peter bungees the ex-criminal up to the ceiling and covers him with more webbing, effectively sticking the man to the ceiling. The teen sits at the island with annoyance and Stephen smiles at him and then turns back to the stove.

"Isn't this a little extreme?" Scott asks.

"Stop flirting with my mom." Peter angles his head to look up at the trapped man. "You can stay up there and think about what you've done."

"What?! Your webs don't dissolve for two hours!"

Peter grins. "Actually that's the experimental formula. I have no idea how long it takes."

"That's just mean."

Both Peter and Stephen ignore Scott's rambling after that and the sorcerer slides a plate full of breakfast to Peter. The teen mumbles his thanks as he digs in, and Stephen fills his own plate and leans against the counter to munch lazily on his own.

"You're up early."

Peter swallows his mouthful of eggs. "I think I'm still on school time."

"In that case, I need to make an appearance at Kamar-Taj if you--"

Peter's eyes widen and he inhales the rest of his breakfast, then blushes when Stephen gives him an unimpressed look. "S-Sorry.  I've just been waiting ages to be able to go with you! Will you teach me magic?!"

"Not today cub. You are going to quietly observe and explore." Peter pouts and the sorcerer takes his empty plate. "Go get dressed."

Peter didn't need to be told twice. He was off like a bat out of hell and Stephen washes their dishes after filling a third plate and shoving it in the microwave. 

"FRIDAY, please tell Tony his breakfast is in the microwave when he wakes up."

"Of course doctor. Shall I tell him of your whereabouts as well?" The AI asks kindly.

Stephen smirks. "No need. Scott can tell him."

He walks over to the floating cloak in the living room and throws it around his shoulders as his robes replace his pajamas, and opens a portal to the mystical compound. Peter races out as the sorcerer steps through and Scott yells for the boy's attention.

"Hey shortstack! Let me down!"

"No way! You deserve that, homewrecker!"

Stephen coughs to hide his laugh as Peter steps through the portal, and he closes it before turning and leaving the room with the teen following close behind.

"Stay close for now. Do you have your phone?"

"Yeah but I thought there wasn't any reception here?"

"We have wi-fi."

"Magical monks use the internet?" Levi smacks the back of Peter's head. "Ow! It was a joke!" He rubs his head and look around. "Where are we going?"

Stephen grabs the teen's shoulder and carefully steers him through another door and out to the compound's training grounds. There a small group of trainees spar with their partners, and Peter watches in wonderment at the different relics being used. A few resting sorcerers look at the teen curiously and whisper to each other, but Peter's enhanced hearing was easily able to pick it up.

"What is the Sorcerer Supreme doing with a child? Is he a new apprentice?" One whispers.

Another scoffs. "There have been rumors that he was co-parenting an orphan. It looks like they're true."

Well the orphan part stung.

The whispers only got worse as Stephen pushes him onto the bench by the lone tree.

"...a distraction..."

"He can't do his job properly with the boy around."

"...ter..."

Then the worst of all...

"He's going to get the Sorcerer Supreme killed."

Hearing his worst fear come from someone rather than his head was a huge reality check. Was he really keeping Stephen from his duties? A distraction?

A danger to his life?

"Peter!"

Peter jolts to attention and looks up at Stephen who gently reaches out and wipes away the tears traitorously rolling down his cheeks. The teen swallows thickly as he gently pushes scarred hands away, only for the sorcerer's arms to cross and an eyebrow raises expectantly. Stephen was too attentive sometimes. He could read Peter like a book.

"What are they saying and who is saying it?"

Peter sighs. "They're saying I'm a distraction and that I'll get you killed."

"Who?"

The teen discreetly points out four trainees across the grounds and Stephen conjures the bands of Cyttorak around the offending people and yanks them to the middle of the grounds. They all yelp in surprise and watch Stephen with apprehension after they regain their footing, and the Sorcerer Supreme waves Levi off to the side. Once the cloak obeys, Stephen glances back at Peter and points to the ground next to him.

"Come here." Peter does as he asks silently and Stephen takes a few steps away before looking at the trainees and motioning to the teen. "Attack him."

The younger mystics look at him as if he asked them to kill a puppy, but Peter was quick to realize Stephen's objective. He could dodge most magic thanks to training between Wanda, Loki, and Stephen himself, and anything he couldn't would probably be deflected by the sorcerer.

"Sir...with all due respect--"

"This is today's exercise. Now attack him. By yourselves or together, I don't care, just do it."

It took a few moments for the first attack to happen and it was hesitant. One of the three males approaches Peter and throws a punch, but he simply catches the man's fist without batting an eye. The moment Peter pushes him away, the other three retrieve their relic weapons from a nearby stand and rush the teen with their own attacks.

Peter uses his senses to dodge and deflect both physical and magical weapons and attacks, and made sure to stay on the defensive so he didn't accidently hurt the mystic warriors. A spell aimed at his chest is deflected by a magical barrier, something that took both Peter and his attackers by surprise, but they quickly refocus and surround the teen.  Once they all lunge at him, Peter jumps up to the tree branch above him, and he crouches on the wooden limb as the four stop mid-attack and look up at him in shock.

"That's enough." Stephen steps back to the center when the four trainees step back in a line. "Can someone tell me why I asked you to do that?"

"To prove the typical lesson not to judge a book by its cover." The lone female says.

"Yes...but you also need to be aware of the fact that he was holding back. He could easily lay all of you out."

"Where did that shield come from?" One of the men ask.

"A simple protection spell." Stephen's lips quirk in amusement at Peter's whisper of 'You're such a mom' from above him. Just loud enough for the sorcerer supreme to hear. "With that said, I never want to hear about my son being ridiculed again. He is not keeping me from my duties, and he is certainly not a distraction. At least not an unwanted one." Stephen turns away and Peter jumps down next to him when he gestures for the boy. "You are excused."

Stephen walks away once Levi returns to his rightful place on the man's shoulders and Peter follows him to the entry room of the compound. He is approached by another master of the mystic artes and she hands him a silver tin and Stephen smiles.

"Thank you. I was running low."

The woman smiles. "Your family getting on your nerves?"

Peter scrunches his nose. "Hey!"

Stephen chuckles. "The Avengers actually...and America's idea of tea is a joke."

"We can't always have our tea leaves blessed by a holy man." Peter snarks.

He is promptly rewarded by another slap from Levi.

"I'll be sure to get you more next time."

"That would be appreciated. Now excuse me while I give this smart-ass teenager a tour."

"I'm sure he learned from the best."

Stephen rolls his eyes. "Oh, ha ha."

The doctor leads Peter away after pocketing the tea tin and fulfills his promise of a tour of the compound. It only took about a couple of hours but Peter seemed to love every second of it. The overzealous side of him came out as he hastily asked questions one after another, barely giving Stephen any time to answer them, until the sorcerer finally opened a portal back to the tower. They both step through into the living room, and when they round the corner into the kitchen, they find Tony looking up at the ceiling. They both follow his gaze and Peter laughs when they find Scott still stuck to the top of the room.

"He's still up there?! It's been like five hours!"

Scott groans. "This has been the most boring day of my life, and I've been under house arrest."

Tony looks down at Peter. "Sooo...wanna tell me why Tic-tac is up there in the first place?"

"He was hitting on Mom."

The genius blinks before grinning and pulling Peter into a side hug. "That's my boy!"

"Are you seriously encouraging his behavior?!" Scott gawks. 

"Of course!" Tony points up at Lang. "You deserve that. I told you Mama Bear is mine."

"I'm not an object." Stephen grumbles.

"Yes you are. The object of my affection. Now be quiet Stephanie."

The webbed ex-criminal sighs. "I hate my life."

[choupetit]

GOT Recap: The Long Night

Airdate: 4/28/19 ; Season 8, Episode 3

The great battle we’ve so been anticipating is upon us and peeps are gonna die! I’m scurred!  The night is indeed dark and full of terrors – and in this particular case, it was so dark that many viewers (including yours truly) had a tough time actually seeing the action on screen.  So adjust your brightness settings, turn off all the lights, grab your stress ball and set a timer to remind yourself to breathe every 5 minutes, ‘cause this was one very intense episode and it’s time for a supersized recap of “The Long Night”. To get the full authentic feel of the show, I highly recommend you wrap some mesh around your eyes to make sure that you have to really squint to read all the words – ya know, so you can feel like you’re there with the characters.  Now, let’s get to it!

Is there any better way to start than a close-up of Samwell Tarly’s shaking hands as some dragonglass weapons are thrust into them?  I think not. Things are tense from the get go, y’all, and we follow Sam as he walks past all the various characters and groups as they take their places for the battle ahead.  

Lyanna Mormont shouts to her men in the courtyard.  Bran, accompanied by Theon Greyjoy and his men, shoots Sam a look as he is pushed in his wheelchair toward the Godswood.  Tyrion grabs a giant flask of wine as he makes his way to the crypts. A giant formation of Unsullied stand at the ready.  Ahead of them are the Dothraki on their horses – Ser Jorah Mormont is among them on his steed looking out into the endless black night.  Ghost is there, too! The Northerners and Free Folk are primed for the fight and we get a nice view of the lineup of all our favorites:  Brienne of Tarth, Jaime Lannister, Podrick Payne, Tormund Giantsbane, Gendry,  The Hound, Beric Dondarrion and Dolorous Edd – whom Sam joins in the formation.  

On the ramparts are sisters Sansa and Arya Stark as well as Ser Davos Seaworth – they peer into the dark, unable to see anything at all.  Overhead a sharp dragon shriek rings out – Daenerys Targaryen and Jon Snow soar past them on the two dragons, Drogon and Rhaegal.  The tension is palpable as the collective group stares off into the cold nothingness. The only sound to be heard is the wind.  They wait.  Out of the darkness, a cloaked rider slowly approaches the front line of Dothraki. It’s Melisandre, here to (hopefully) save the day! Or night!  She asks Jorah to instruct the horde to raise their swords.  As they do, Melisandre walks to one of the riders, clasps his blade in her hand and starts to chant some witchy voodoo words. The blade catches on fire and it sets off a domino effect:  A sea of Dothraki swords is set ablaze and it’s awesome to behold.  Damn straight, Night King, we comin’ for ya!!  Jorah gives a nod of appreciation, and as Melisandre’s horse makes its way toward the Winterfell gates, she passes Grey Worm and says “Valar Morghulis” (All men must die). He replies “Valar Dohaeris” (All men must servce). Ugh, all men must die?!  Noooo, it’s been nice knowing you, Grey Worm!

As the fire priestess approaches, Ser Davos instructs the guards to open the gates and he storms down to confront her.  They meet and she tells him to cool his jets.  “No need to kill me, dude, I’ll be dead before dawn.” Melisandre glances to the ramparts where she sees Arya looking at her.  Hey, now they’re like…what’s the female term for “Tunnel Brothers”…maybe ”Sausage Sisters”? They both stare at each other for a moment, stone faced.  

We get an awesome view from the ramparts of all the Dothraki with their fiery swords, and on the battle field, Jorah calls out to the riders to charge.  All the Dorthraki surge ahead, shrieking out their battle cries as they gallop along with Jorah and our favoritest  direwolf of them all.  Oh man, I really hope Ghost doesn’t bite it in this battle!   Jon and Dany watch from a hillside as the Dothraki advance in one huge fiery mass.  

We still can’t see any White Walkers or Army of Dead in the dark.  The Unsullied release their trebuchets and blazing boulders launch over the advancing Dothraki into the void.  Everybody at Winterfell watches on in suspense. As the boulders land, and the Dothraki meet their enemy, however, the fires are snuffed out one by one.  A few shouts are heard in the distance as the darkness swallows up every last flame. Oh crap!  

As the fighters outside Winterfell stand in shock, we hear horses whinnying and retreating in the dark. Dothraki run toward Winterfell on foot. Suddenly, Jorah gallops past – a vague look of shock on his cut face.  He rides past all the men standing ready to fight and looks Tormund straight in the eye.  Holy moly, y’all.  What the heck is out there and how are they going to fight whatever is coming if fire can’t even hurt the Dead?  The men on the ground steel themselves as creepy non-human sounds come at them from the distance.  Omigod, omigod, omigod, I can’t handle it.

From the hill, Dany starts for her dragon.  Jon stops her and says, “The Night King is coming.” Um, don’t you remember the plan to protect, Bran? Dany shoots back defiantly, “The Dead are already here.” She mounts Drogon.

Back on the ground, our protagonists brace themselves for what’s coming.  Grey Worm dons his helmet.  It’s go time!  As the creepy sounds get closer, the Unsullied hold their spears at the ready and suddenly a massive sea of dead soldiers steamroll them.  If you’ve ever seen World War Z, this is it.  It’s like a gazillion ants overrunning everything. Only instead of ants, it’s a bunch of nasty resurrected dead people coming so fast and in numbers so immense that it’s an ocean of wights washing over the soldiers outside Winterfell.  I can’t even keep track of who’s fighting who – it’s a huge terrible massacre.  We see a few shots of all our fan faves and at one point Jaime helps save Brienne from a few snow zombies.  

All of a sudden a jet of fire rains down – it’s Daenerys on Drogon, torching a bunch of the undead.  Huzzah! And a second later we see another fire stream – Jon and Rhaegal for the assist!  Gee, I hope nothing is happening to Bran in the Godswood right now. Truly, though, it’s the right call, and with the fire power of the two dragons, our people on the ground at least stand a better chance at survival.  Jon sees the Army of Dead and White Walkers further off in the distance and steers his dragon toward them.  But as Rhaegal approaches, a giant snow blizzard engulfs them. He can barely see anything, but manages to shoot off another fire stream onto the Dead below.

On the ramparts, Arya turns to Sansa and orders her to the crypts.  When Sansa scoffs that she doesn’t want to abandon her people, Arya insists she leave and hands her a dragonglass dagger. When Sansa protests that she doesn’t know how to use it, Arya states “Stick ‘em with the pointy end.” Yaaaaaassss, love the callback!

Back on the battlefield, the blizzard has hit the fighters.  It’s terribly disorienting, but our fan faves duke it out with the snow zombies. Sam falls to the ground during an attack and Edd helps him up, only to get stabbed through the back of the head. Noooo!  RIP, Edd!  Sam turns and runs.

Meanwhile, Sansa descends into the crypts.  “Ok, girl, just remember to be super chill when you see everybody and don’t let them know we are all completely effed.” As she approaches the women and children, she keeps a calm, cool demeanor.  Ya know what, Sansa’s chill factor is crazy impressive.  Remember the battle at Blackwater?  This gal knows how to lock it down and keep everybody else from panicking. She shoots Tyrion a lowkey “We are screwed” look and he chugs some wine from his flask.  Hey, I’ll take whatever comedic relief I can get at this point. There isn’t a lot of dialogue in this episode, and I gotta say the silent moments are on point!  Well done, thespians!

In the skies, Jon attempts to navigate his way through the blizzard on Rhaegal but suddenly another dragon bodychecks them – it’s Daenerys on Drogon.  Whoopsies!  They can barely see anything in this storm.   Both of them regain their hold and they see hordes of Dead continuing to advance on Winterfell.

On the ground, Tormund and Brienne instruct the fighters to fall back and Grey Worm commands the Unsullied to protect the retreating Northerners. Lyanna Mormont has her men open the gates to them and they file in.  Hey, would you look at that!  Other than Edd, all our peeps are still alive! Knock on wood!

Jon steers Rhaegal toward the Godswood, while Bran and the Greyjoy gang wait in the eerily quiet enclosure.  The dragon perches on one of the nearby walls.  

During the retreat, Arya shoots a lit arrow from the ramparts just past the Hound’s head, saving him from a zombie.  Nice shot! Some of the Unsullied pile into Winterfell, while another group holds off the Army of Dead.  Grey Worm stands outside the gates and calls out to Davos to give the signal to set the trenches on fire.  Davos raises two torches in the air – this is the clear sign for Daenerys to swoop down with her dragon, only…she doesn’t see it on account of that pesky blizzard.  Ugh, no! The Army of Dead are almost at the gates.  The archers attempt to light the trenches but their arrows flame out almost immediately. 

Grey Worm notices Melisandre nearby and gets a team of Unsullied to protect her so she can help out.  She lays her hands on the trenches and, again, does some incantations.  Nothing happens.  She continues.  The Army of Dead get closer and closer.  Nothing. She keeps on keeping on and just as a snow zombie comes careening at her, the trenches go up in flames, keeping the Dead at bay while the rest of the living retreat inside the walls of Winterfell. 

 From above, Daenerys sees the trenches and realizes she missed the signal. Drogon glides past the snow zombies and blasts another stream of fire on the Dead. Ok, timeout here:  Why doesn’t Dany just go full Zamboni here and  torch them all in one nice continuous line back and forth instead of just a solitary stream here and there?  I’ll be the first to admit that I don’t understand the complexities of dragon-keeping, or their diets, and the rock-solid science that goes into their ability to breathe fire, but I’m really feeling that both Jon and Dany’s dragons could be doing a much more efficient job at wiping out way more snow zombies than they currently are.

In the super safe crypts below, Tyrion argues that he should be above ground as there may be some important thing, which nobody else might have noticed, that might make a difference. Sansa dismisses his remarks, stating that he would die.   Being realistic about that fact is the bravest thing any of them can do right now. There’s a brief lighthearted moment as Tyrion muses that he and Sansa should have stayed married. She agrees he was the best of them all, but things would never work out between them because of their conflicting loyalties – he supports Daenerys, and she supports the free North.  I’ve been thinking for a while now that these two will end up together on the Iron Throne at the very end.  Might this moment be paving the way for that possibility? 

Theon and his men stand alert in the Godswood with Bran sitting under his beloved Weirwood tree.  With the trenches lit, Theon knows their time is running out.  He attempts to apologize to Bran for all the crappy things he did back when he tried to take Winterfell for his own, but Bran stops him and explains that everything Theon has done has lead him to where he is now – home.  Awwww, Bran, even though you’re completely devoid of emotion, you still know all the right words to say!  I’m thinking there’s a Hallmark greeting card career in this one’s future.  Or, also…death. Maybe.   Then Bran is all “M’kay, things are getting pretty real now, so, I’m gonna go.” His eyes turn white and he’s off in Wargyland.  We see some ravens perched in a tree and their eyes go white.   They fly over Winterfell and the battle between the living and the dead.  As they soar up, up, up, they see:  The Night King flying on Viserion. He stretches his arm down to the ground and…

The snow zombies  all stand motionless outside the burning trenches, but suddenly one solitary zombie walks straight into the fire.  Then another.  And another.  Until they have made a little pathway for all the other zombies to walk over them and descend upon the Winterfell walls.  Why is this happening?!  Davos rallies the troops to man the walls.  Once again in World War Z fashion, the Army of Dead start to pile up onto each other to scale the wall.  Nooooo, this is looking really bad for all the good guys inside the castle. Please tell me there is an army of Fire Priestesses coming to save the day.  Or Nymeria and her ginormous wolf pack.  Or anything, really, because this is absolutely freaking me out.  Jon is watches everything from his dragon perch, and as he looks up, he sees the Night King and decides to fly after him. Great, I’m sure this will go off without a hitch.

On the walls, we see all our beloved warriors – they are still alive, you guys!  I’m happy but I’m real scared for them.  Jaime, Brienne, Gendry, Tormund, Beric, the Hound, Sam and Jorah all give the snow zombies  a good fight, but the sheer volume of Dead is insane, and of course, more and more make it over the wall.

The whole scene inside Winterfell is pure chaos.  There’s fire and death everywhere and the Hound is huddled against a wall suffering a panic attack.  We finally see Arya in action and it’s bee-you-tee-ful!  She fights off wights like it’s an art form, while Davos looks on with awe and respect.

Beric tries to rally the Hound, who has lost all hope and exclaims “You can’t fight death!” Just then, Arya bounds over a wall, slaying snow zombies like a boss and darts off inside Winterfell castle.  “Tell that to her,” says Beric.  This manages to get the Hound back into the game – they run after her.

With a terrifying crash, a snow zombie giant bursts through the Winterfell gate, swinging his club everywhere.  He hits Lyanna Mormont who flies through the air like a rag doll.  As the giant continues to pummel anybody in a 20 foot radius, Lyanna musters the strength to get back up on her feet and runs at him with a primal scream – battle axe in hand.  The giant wight picks her up with one hand and crushes her bones.  Ew, so gross…poor Lyanna! He lifts her to his face and she gets a look at his nasty mouth and rotting teeth just before she plunges her dragonglass axe straight into his glowing blue eye, killing him.  Oh, man, RIP Lyanna Mormont, you badass, you!  A hero to the end – I love her!

In the skies above the Godswood, Jon and Dany hover on their dragons, when the Night King appears out of nowhere on his zombie dragon.  Viserion blasts a stream of blue dragon fire at Dany and Drogon.  In the attack, Rhaegal falls in a tailspin with Jon holding on for dear life. Meanwhile, Drogon darts upward, trying to avoid the dragon fire and Dany clutches on to him – lucky for her, dragon fire don’t hurt!  Or does it? Just as quickly as he appeared, the Night King vanishes and Dany and Jon regain control of their dragons.

Arya makes her way into the Winterfell library – wait, Winterfell has a library?!  A few wights are wandering around aimlessly.  It’s an excruciatingly suspenseful scene as Arya froggers her way from one stack to the next, expertly avoiding the snow zombies at every turn, until she finally makes it to the other side of the room and out the door.  Gotta say, I’m not really sure why she’s inside and where she is heading, but it’s still a cool scene.  When she closes the library door behind her, however, she hears more wights and a few burst through a different door nearby.  She fights them off and races through a bunch of corridors.

We get a quick view into the crypts – the women and children can hear terrified screams and bumps up the stairs, but they are still safe.  For now.

Elsewhere inside the castle, Beric and the Hound cautiously make their way through the maze of passageways. A door bursts open and Arya thuds to the ground on her back, trying to kill the snow zombie on top of her.  Beric saves her life and fights off the next round of wights, while the Hound ushers Arya down another hallway.  Even more of the Dead come and Beric valiantly holds them off, sacrificing himself as a human barrier in the hallway.  Arya and the Hound duck into a room, and a critically injured Beric follows them and collapses to the floor as they bar the door.  Arya crouches next to Beric as his last breath escapes his chest and his eyes go dead.  

Oh hey, looks who’s also here in the room!  It’s Melisandre.  She tells Arya the Lord of Light brought Beric back for a purpose, and that purpose has been served. Arya turns to the Red Woman and goes “Hey, I know you.  You made lots of freaky predictions for me, and you were right about them.  Like how we’d meet again and how I’d kill a bunch of people.” -“And here we are. I also told you that you’d close a lot of eyes forever:  brown eyes, green eyes…and blue eyes.”  The wights claw and pound at the door.  Melisandre leans into Arya and says “What do we say to the god of death?” Arya stares at the door and replies “Not today.” She takes a moment and then runs off.

In the Godswood, Theon and his crew defend Bran from tons of snow zombies and they are doing a pretty good job.  And what’s Bran doing?  Still warging, but we don’t know what he’s seeing, so one can only presume that he is watching all the series finales of Lost, The Sopranos, Dexter and Seinfeld and taking notes on what not to do.  

The Night King is in full destruction mode and has his dragon blast a huge hole in one of the Winterfell turrets.  Jon is right on his tail and we have a mid-air dragon fight between Rhaegal and Viserion.  Dany is close by and sees the Night King fall off his dragon.  Jon’s dragon, meanwhile sustains some injuries in the fight and ends up crash landing – Jon is thrown off into the snow during the crash.   Jorah, who is fighting in the courtyard, looks up when he hears a dragon’s distressed cry. Is his Khaleesi in trouble?

Daenerys spies the Night King on the ground.  It’s time to dracarys the crap out of this mofo!  Drogon blasts out a long stream of fire and the Night King is engulfed in flames.  

Jon is nearby and stumbles toward the inferno.  But as the fire subsides and the flames die down we see:  the Night King stands there unharmed.  He glares at Daenerys, and then he gives her a winning smirk and pulls back his spear arm.  Daenerys acts fast and gets her dragon airborne just in time for the spear to miss them.  Question…might the Night King be a Targaryen and this is why he doesn’t burn?

The Night King walks toward Winterfell and Jon runs after him.  Night King stops, turns to look at Jon and goes “Hey, bro, wanna see my fun parlor trick again?”  He raises his arms and we all know what’s coming.  The dead are all being resurrected!  Noooo!  Fallen bodies rise everywhere: the battle field, the Winterfell courtyard, and of course also…the crypts, and we see the Night King’s lieutenants walk through the Winterfell gates.  Meep! The Night King gives Jon a “That’ll keep ya busy for a while” look and turns to leave.  I’m officially losing all hope here.

Back in the Godswood, Theon and his guys still fight off the baddies while Bran is…still warging!!! Omg, Bran, seriously?  He better be seeing something really great and have figured out some fantastic way to kill the Night King.  But ya know what?  We just don’t know, because we don’t get to see any of it.

Surrounded by a fresh Army of Dead, Jon looks about done for, but Dany swoops in to save him and torches a bunch of snow zombies.  Well, that’s a good sign, considering the tense moment they shared before the fighting began.  Jon yells to Dany “Bran!” and she tells him to go save him while she handles the wights on the ground.  In a matter of seconds, a bunch of snow zombies have jumped atop of Drogon and the dragon takes to the sky to shake them off – and Daenerys falls off. Great.  She is surrounded by wights and just as an undead zombie is about to strike, its head is chopped off by:  Ser Jorah Mormont for the win!!! Wooooot! He fights off more wights and Dany picks up a sword – they back up to each other, ready to take on more of the dead.

Jon battles his way through the gates and in the courtyard he sees his friends fighting for their lives – overpowered by the mass of undead that are attacking them.  Sam is on the ground and Jon just keeps running.  Brienne is also struggling.  It’s all completely hopeless.

In the Godswood, Theon is out of arrows.  He and his men continue to put up a brave fight, while Bran is still off on his warging vacation.  DUDE!!! Can you please for the love of the Old Gods and the New figure out a way to help everybody?

The crypts aren’t looking any better, what with all the dead Stark skeletons attacking everybody. Sansa and Tyrion hide behind a grave and have a long wordless exchange as they look at each other, accepting that these may be their last few moments alive.  

A haunting melancholy song starts to play over all the following scenes:

Sansa pulls out the dagger Arya gave her, and Tyrion kisses her hand before they both leave their hiding place and run to…I don’t know…commit suicide in once last heroic act to kill as many wights as they can before they go down?

The music continues and we get snippets of all our heroes in great peril.  Jon makes his way through the courtyard on his mission to get to Bran, but the ice dragon, Viserion, is in his path, spewing his fiery blue stream everywhere, and Jon keeps having to retreat for cover.  

Jorah and Dany continue to fight off snow zombies.

The crypts are a mess, but Sansa and Tyrion have managed to find a safe alcove with Varys and a few others.

Jon keeps attempting to advance toward the Godswood but the dragon stops him at every turn.  

Theon shows some mad fighting skills, and it’s really a nice redeeming moment to see him working so hard to protect Bran.  He battles the last of his attackers, when looky here…in slow motion to the haunting melody, we see the Night King and his White Walker entourage saunter into the Godswood.

There’s one last shot of all our brave men and women in the courtyard – Jaime, Podrick, Grey Worm, Brienne, Tormund, Sam – they are all completely screwed, fighting off zombies with a snowball’s chance of survival.  I do not like this one bit.  

In the Godswood, Theon puts up a final fight and kicks snow zombie butt like a boss till none are standing.  Finally Bran’s white eyes flicker back to consciousness.  “Oh hai, y’all! Did I miss anything?” Great timing, Bran.  I hope you have an ace up your sleeve.  Bran looks at Theon and in a far off voice tells him “Theon, you’re a good man. Thank you.”

Theon casts one last glance at Bran, then grabs a spear and runs headlong at the Night King who stands there cool as a cucumber.  Seeing how it’s all in slow mo, it takes a good while and all I can think is “Oh, dude, there’s just no way.” Sure enough, at the moment he is within reach, Night King grabs his spear, and impales Theon Greyjoy.  Ya know what, I gave Theon a lot of flack throughout the series, but this episode he really came through as a brave warrior and got the absolution from Bran that he has so craved. I am just a teary mess at this point.

Again, we get lots of cutaways to all the other peeps who are pretty much about to bite it – including Jorah who takes some gnarly hits as he continues to protect Daenerys.  Jon rises from his place of cover, looks at Viserion and screams at him while the dragon hocks up a nice big fireball loogie to spew at him.  Really, Jon?  That’s how you’re gonna go out?

The Night King walks slowly to Bran who looks up at him like “You wouldn’t hurt a guy in a wheelchair, would you?”  Ok, actually, Bran looks as vacant as ever, ready to accept whatever fate has in store for him.  He glances at the snow sword the Night King has on his back like “Soooo…you gonna use that on me bro?” Night King looks back like “Oh, you like this?  Let me introduce the two of you.” This music is killing me, people.  It’s the saddest tune ever.  Night King reaches back behind his shoulder and BOOM, out of nowhere Arya flies through the sky behind him, her catspaw dagger clutched in her hand.  But the Night King spins around and grabs her mid-air by the throat.  She drops the dagger and it falls in slow motion…and then...Arya catches it with her other hand and with one fell thrust, sticks him with the pointy end right in his icy belly.  OH. MY. STARS.  The Night King immediately shatters.  In a chain reaction, all his White Walker lieutenants, the snow zombies, and his ice dragon, crumble to the ground.  Arya lands like the boss queen that she is and instantly achieves GOAT status in all of Westeros.

We get a view of our faves again – Ser Jorah collapses.  Jon is alive. All the important people from the crypts are alive, and Arya and Bran stand alone in the quiet Godswood, corpses littering the snow.

Danerys holds Jorah, sobbing, and he dies in her arms. Nooooo!  RIP Ser Jorah!  This awesome friendzone 4eva warrior died protecting his Khaleesi, and that’s pretty much the only way he would want to go out, but it breaks my heart nonetheless. As Dany cries and cradles him, Drogon swoops down beside his dragon mama and protectively covers her with his wing.  Awww, Drogon, that is sweet, but also: Where the hell were you like 10 minutes ago, hmmm?!  It does NOT take that long to shake off a few undead snow zombies.

The Hound and Melisandre emerge into the outdoors.  Melisandre keeps walking, past the dead, through the gates of Winterfell.  Davos watches as she walks into the sunrise. She lets her cloak fall to the ground.  As she walks through the battlefield, she removes her ruby necklace and drops it in the snow. We only see the back of her as she continues on.  Her hair turns white and her walk becomes stilted.  Finally she collapses with an air of release and exhaustion and the wind carries away a wisp of dust where she lays.  Gurl, I feel ya.  Aaaand roll credits.

Whuuuuuut just happened??? This was such an incredibly tense episode and it had me tied in knots, but honestly, that ending had me feeling major disappointment in terms of the end of the Night King and the Long Night and everything – it’s all over, just like that, and now we’re just back to the petty business of getting Cersei off the throne?  Yes, it was a good and very suspenseful episode, but I had a lot of expectations that were not met.   

Part of that may be because I was reading so many theories that had to do with the prophecies around Azor Ahai and Lightbringer that are mentioned in the books, so maybe that’s my bad.   And I thought Jaime would play a much bigger role than just fighting next to Brienne.  Especially after Jaime’s chat with Bran the previous episode.  

Mostly, I’m bummed that the Dead storyline is dunzo, because I felt there was a lot of mythology around the Night King and the White Walkers and the Children of the Forest, and the Three Eyed Raven that we didn’t get much information on.  Why did the Night King decide to take over the world now? Who was he as a human? If White Walkers were defeated 1,000 years ago, how did they come back? What about Night King’s ability to transform babies into White Walkers, and yet we don’t see any White Walker nursemaids anywhere?  Who is raising the White Walker toddlers, people???   Well, it’s all moot now, but I’d still like to have known.  

What about all the fire priestesses who have been rallying for Dany in Essos?  And what did Melisandre do while she was away - I assumed she’d be gathering her squad and coming up with a much better game plan than “I’m gonna light a few useless things on fire”. Ok, she did give Arya that last pep talk to send her on her way, but really, that was her big contribution and it seemed lacking overall.  Why didn’t we get to see what Bran was doing while he was warging the whole time?  I wanted flashbacks!  I wanted him to accidentally pull a Hodor on the Mad King and be the reason the king went mad - all while Bran was digging in the past, trying to figure out a way to kill the White Walkers AND then go even further back in time and build the Wall...and all the other crazy theories I’ve read.  I wanted Tyrion to surprise everybody and be like “Guess what, I still have a Wildfire contact and I got us some secret sauce to kill the White Walkers”. 

And then there is Nymeria and her giant wolf pack - I thought they’d show up and kill some wights. Also: Are the Reeds (Meera and her dad, Howlan) just totally MIA, even though all the Northern bannermen were called to help Winterfell?   I feel like they would have shown up to help.  Also, the show  was making a really big deal out of the crypts in the GOT Season 8 trailers - they have gone to the trouble to include them in the credits. There has to be more to the crypts than just everybody hiding there in this episode, and having the dead come back to life, right?  I hope so.

I will give credit to the good parts that I really loved – like Arya’s badassery and her saving the day by the Weirwood tree where Bran gave her the catspaw dagger to begin with. That same dagger, which was used in the assassination attempt of little  Bran.  In a way – just as Littlefinger mentioned - that dagger did start a chain of events that led all the Starks to where they were today, with the skills they’ve acquired to help rid their world of this one huge threat to humanity.  It’s poetic and I appreciate that.  And I really enjoyed the Sansa and Tyrion moments.  Those two are totes gonna get together, and I really do think the way things will shake out, we’ll see them on the throne at the very end. But, I guess I’m just sad that in the end the huge threat of the White Walkers seems like it was simply a red herring side plot and now we’re back to business as usual.  

It seems really unfair that this huge epic event took place and the only people who know about it are the Northerners. It didn’t affect anybody else in Westeros, and yet it is the most important thing that happened, because if the good guys had failed, it would have rendered everybody else in Westeros dead – and I feel like they will get no love or appreciation from anybody for that.   I just felt like the war against the White Walkers was such a big thing and instead it’s just all “Meh, they’re gone. Next chapter!”  I mean…what purpose will Bran serve now?  

And while it is, of course, sad to see Dolorous Edd, Beric Dondarrion, Lyanna Mormont and Theon Greyjoy die, it’s kind of small potatoes.  The only death that was super impactful was that of Ser Jorah Mormont, because the other characters were likable yet minor when you look at emotional stakes for the viewer.  It just doesn’t seem very Game of Thrones-y to not lose some huge players. Can the whole remaining Stark family really survive the rest of the series?  Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy all our fan faves are still doing well, but I expected to feel much more gutted by this episode.  Maybe they are just saving their deaths for the next few episodes. Double meep! Omigoodness, I just realized that I’m sad that the writers didn’t emotionally flay me.  What the heck have you done to me, GOT?!

Anyway, I’ve had a few days to process it all and have come to terms with the fact that the whole Long Night, “Winter is Here” plot which had so much mystery, prophecy and cool potential, just ain’t happening anymore.  It is, after all, called Game of Thrones and not Game of Surviving the Freaky Deaky Undead Weirdos, so I’m coming around to the fact that our heroes are now going to focus on who’ll be on the Iron Throne.  I just…hate Cersei and don’t want to see her stupid face anymore. I’m kinda hoping there is a secret passageway from Winterfell to the Red Keep and Arya can just go to Cersei, disguised as Jaime and kill her already.  Ok, those are all my thoughts for now.  I’ll see ya here next week!