#when you are always sad whos gonna notice when you get so sad its scary?

[tortademaracuya]

I feel like the boy who cried wolf

[stilespeters]

Keep your head up (part 2*)

(part 1) (part 2*) (part 3)

pairing: Kai Anderson x fem!reader

a/n: wasn't gonna include smut initially but it fitted the story so uhh yay. i didn't proofread it:p its the first time i actually wrote smut soooo help?

summary: after deja vu and a trip down memory lane, Kai makes a final decision which he'll regret for a lifetime

word count: 2289

warnings: smut (oral, choking, p in v), flashbacks, murder, choking, guns, violence, angst, kai being a bitch, more angst, more angst?!! death, sadness and angst

After a few weeks of staying at the Anderson household, Kai and you began dating. Winter noticed the way you two spoke to each other, and even though she was kinda worried about it, she loved the two of you so much. You two were the most important people to her. She wanted you to be happy, and if that was with Kai, she was fine with that. It took her a while to get adjusted to the new dynamic, but once she saw how happy the two of you were, she felt like it was always supposed to be this way.

You were truly in love, and that love was reciprocated.

After your fifth week together as a couple, you two had just dined and were on the streets, talking about random topics you haven't talked about yet.

That’s until you rounded a corner and stood in a ditch. "Freedom! I wanna be free!" you yelled and Kai laughed as a few people on the streets glanced at you.

You turned to look at him and scanned his features that were illuminated by the lamppost. “You know, you look kinda scary in the darkness.”

“I do?”

“Yeah, you look absolutely menacing right now.” He laughed and stepped closer to you. “It’s like you attract the darkness.”

“I am attracted to the darkness, and I’m also attracted to you,” he joked and he smiled. “What can I do to make myself look less scary?”

“Hmm,” you began and you squinted your eyes. “Keep your head up.” He did what you said and after that, you placed two of your fingers on his lips. “Now you don't look scary at all. You look like a sweet angel.”

“Really?” he had his hands on your back as he pulled you in “These lips? Lips, you enjoy kissing.”

“Yeah,” you leaned in and gave him a kiss “It somehow makes you look less scary.”

“Okay, I feel like this is an insult.” He joked.

“It’s not, I actually like scary you.”

“Yeah? I bet you do,” he winked. “Wanna see where else I can be scary?” His lips curled up into a smirk and you rolled your eyes playfully while chuckling.

A few seconds later, you noticed he had stopped talking and when you looked up at him, you found him already staring at you. “Why do you keep looking at me?”

“I just can't take my eyes off of you.”

“Stop it.”

“Why? I enjoy looking at you.”

“I’m uncomfortable.”

"But you're so pretty. I'm afraid I can never take my eyes off of you, never in any circumstances. I will keep looking at you, no matter what you say.”

You gave him a knowing look and raised your eyebrows. He simply stood there with a smug smirk and his hands in his pockets. He then walked up to you and you stepped back till your back reached the wall of the building. He trapped you in with his body and he pressed his lips delicately against yours.

After he pulled away, you were both breathless. “You are pretty much the only one who I look up to.”

“Right back at ya,” you responded and he held you in his arms."Remember to keep your head up. The last couple of days have been rough for you, but I promise I will be there for you even if the world comes crashing down. I know we've only been together for 5 weeks, but I love you. Nothing, and I mean nothing can ever change that. Keep your head up and nothing can ever stop you. You’ll be invincible.”

“I will.” He promised and he smiled at your words and leaned down to press his lips against yours again, and you pressed your body against his.

He made a promise to himself right there and then that he would never take his eyes off of you. Life was short and he wanted to get every opportunity to look at you. He was afraid that if he didn’t, that you’d slip out of his grasp.

And he kept that promise. That night, the night of 9th of August, the two of you spent the first night together. You have wanted it for a while, so did Kai, but you were waiting for the right moment. You wanted it to be perfect and this felt like the right moment. "I want you,"

Kai’s eyes widened. “What?”

“I want you, Kai. I need you.”

As you got home and found out that Winter wasn't home, you had immediately continued the make out session in his bedroom. He trailed his fingers to your back and zipped your dress open till it felll ro the ground, and he couldn't stop staring at your body. Every curve was perfect to him and he swore he was in heaven as he saw the look of lust in your eyes. He got rid of his own clothing and as your body hit the duvet sheets, he was immediately on top of you.

He kissed every inch of your exposed neck, and he trailed his lips to your collarbone until he hooked his fingers around your back to unclasp your bra. Once your chest was exposed to him, he immediately trailed kisses on your breasts. You let out a moan as his other hand cupped your other breast and squeezed it. He wanted to hear more of those pretty sounds you made and he wanted to see what spurred you on.

Your skin felt hot to his touch, and as he left your breasts, his face moved towards yours again and he pressed a kiss to your nose. You were breathless and so was he, and you felt his erection press against your thigh. "You sure you wanna do this?" he asked and you nodded. "Never been more sure."

He smiled and his face went to your neck as he sucked and nipped at your skin. Bruises left a trail on your collarbone and neck, and you felt his fingers creeping up your thighs. Once he reached the waistbands of your underwear, he pulled them all the way down slowly in a teasing manner.

"Can I go down on you?" He asked breathlessly and you nodded. When he adjusted himself in his position, he started trailing his kisses south till he reached your chest. He pressed a few kisses between your breasts before he kissed your stomach. He looked up at you as he reached your private parts and he swore under his breath as he saw you look down at him, waiting in anticipation.

When his lips met your clit, you moaned his name loudly. He groaned and closed his eyes to savor you, and as your legs trembled, he placed his hands on your knees. When you arched your back, he slid one finger between your folds and curled it against your sweet spot. He kept rubbing while he sucked and licked your clit.

After a minute or so, you felt your release mearing and as you tugged his hair, you felt it building up. "Oh fuck." You moaned and he stopped licking your clit as he looked up at you. "That's it," he encouraged. "Let go, pretty girl, you're so close."

He spat on your clit before licking and sucking again while simultaneously rubbing your walls and that's when you clenched around his fingers and came. You saw stars as he continued, and he praised you as you came down from your high. As he moved up to face you again, you pressed your lips against his and you could taste your arousal and Kai found it hot as fuck.

When you reached down to his dick, you rubbed it up and down your folds and you heard him grunt in your ear. When he slid it inside, you immediately clenched around him and you both moaned in unison as he bottomed out. "Fuck you're tight." He gave you time to adjust as he pressed kisses on your cheek. It had been a while for you since you last slept with someone, and since Kai was pretty well endowed, you had to adjust a bit longer.

One you felt like you were ready, you squeezed his bicep and looked him in the eyes. "You can move."

Kai started moving his hips in a slow pace and the headboard of the bed pushed softly against the wall. You moaned as pleasure began to build in your stomach and Kai grunted as you clenched and unclenched around him. "Feels so good." he mumbled and he had a smug look on his face as he saw your eyebrows knitted together in pleasure. Your eyes were closed and Kai started sucking new marks on your neck as he continued pushing in and out of you.

You grabbed his hands and placed them on your neck, and Kai felt like he was seeing stars. He didn't know you were into that kind of thing and he had smiled as you moaned harder as his hands pressed pressure on your throat. "Such a slut for me," he whispered and you felt yourself coming closer to the edge.

"Open your eyes." You opened your eyes at the command and as his thrusts were getting sharper and harder, you wanted to close them again because it felt too good. However, you seemed to be in a trance as you made eye contact with him and you heard the bed creak and the headboard slam against the wall. "I wanna look at you as you fall apart. I wanna look at you as you cum around my cock."

You moaned his name again like a mantra and as he pressed a little more pressure on your throat. He was never gonna do it in a way where you couldn't breathe. He cared too much for you to do that. He just found it hot that you were submissive to him.

He would never ever hurt you in any way possible.

His hands on your neck loosened since he was scared he'd actually choke you, and you couldn't help but close your eyes again as you neared your climax. Kai tapped your cheek and your eyes were half opened as you were drowning in euphoria. "Look at me." he commanded again, and this time as he pushed his fingers between your lips and gathered your saliva to then rub your clit, you came undone.

present time

In and out of consciousness. That’s what you were pulled into.

You were on the ground with Kai on top of you as he pressed his hands against your throat, and you couldn't breathe as he pressed as much pressure as possible. He kept choking you as you tried to gasp for air and you were afraid he'd break your neck. There were tears in his eyes, and as you looked back at him, he screamed in agony. He was sobbing violently and tears escaped your eyes as you realized this was the end.

"Kai please stop!" Winter cried out and as she tried to reach you, Speedwagon and Pussbucket held her back.

As everything around you turned darker, Kai suddenly loosened his grip around your throat and you gasped for air. He was crying and he looked everywhere but your eyes as his hands still remained on your neck.

You felt tired and your head was spinning, but the part that hurt you the most was that he couldn't seem to look at you. And so, you weakly pulled up your arm with the last bit of strength you had left, and you caressed his cheek.

“Look at me.”

Kai was trapping your body with his legs whilst you laid on the ground. You just felt numb as your throat burned. He had been intimate with you many times but never this kind of intimate.

“Kai,” you let out a whimper. “Kai, baby, look at me.” your voice broke and your throat burned. “Why won't you look at me?”

“Please look at me.”

He heard the words, but he wasn't listening to them. He was trying so hard not to pull away. He knew that if he saw the look of despair in your eyes, that he’d chicken out. You had betrayed him, right? Why was it so hard for him to make an end to your life? If it was any other person, he'd done it without thinking twice.

“Please Kai, look at me.”

“Look at me.” He tried to fight the inevitable, but he lost. He slowly and carefully moved his eyes towards yours, and there were tears evident as his cheeks were wet. He expected to see you cry, he expected to see you begging for mercy, begging for life. But when his eyes met yours, all he saw was acceptance.

“My sweet angel,” Kai’s jaws clenched and he trembled violently as your hands moved to cup his cheek. Your thumb caressed the skin under his eye. “What happened to us?”

He didn't respond. “How did we get here?”

“What have we done to each other?”

He let out a sob and you couldn't help but reciprocate the action and your index finger and middle finger moved to his lips. Your pads brushed softly against his skin and you smiled weakly.

You used to think that Kai was like you, attracted to the darkness. But now you realized that he was the darkness. You were scared of him, and as he closed his eyes as the pads of your fingers brushed his lips, you smiled.

“Now you don't look scary at all.”

He brought his hand to your wrist, and rubbed with his thumb on your skin. He looked lost, he looked as if he was gonna stop. The gentle gesture of his thumb on your wrist indicated that he softened. But as you looked in his eyes, you saw something switch.

His eyes narrowed, his jaw clenched shut tightly, he stopped sobbing and he slapped your hand away from his face. He placed his hands on your neck and pulled you up till you were kneeling in front of him. Your throat hurt like hell, and you gasped for air as your knees bruised against the wooden floor.

Kai walked away for a few seconds only for him to show up again in front of you. Your eyes were focused on his shoes, and your body felt like falling down.

"Kai no!" Winter screamed.

“Keep your head up.” Your slumped head moved up till you made eye contact with Kai.

There were no tears in your eyes. You didn’t feel sad anymore. All you felt was exhaustion. All you wanted was this nightmare to end. All the pain and suffering wasn't worth trying to survive. Your body has fought for so long, your mental health has suffered too much. You just wanted everything to stop, and so you had accepted your fate.

He towered above you and you stared down the barrel of the gun. His finger was hooked around the trigger, and you knew that this would be your demise. The people in the background had faded for you, and you had one last glance at Winter who was crying, before looking at your lover.

You closed your eyes and were met with darkness.

“Freedom at last.” you whispered and your lips curled up into a weak smile.

Kai then pulled the trigger.

[giuli328]

Agnosis | Eddie Munson Fanfiction

chapter five: fallen angels

wc: 687

synopsis and masterlist

previous chapter

————————————————————————

Eddie became aware of his tarnished reputation when he was five years old. It was 1971 and Al was late to drop him off for his first day of kindergarten. Eddie was already embarrassed of his father's behavior. He knew the looks people gave him and the arguments he'd get into with Elizabeth meant he must've been doing something wrong. All the time.

But Eddie hadn't gotten those looks. He was just a kid. But, he was a Munson kid. So that changed pretty quickly.

Al dropped Eddie off outside the elementary school. The biggest help he gave him was waiting until he walked into the school, and then he was on his own.

When he finally found his classroom he walked in nervously with flushed cheeks, shy about being late.

"Oh hi there. Are you in my class?" his teacher smiles.

"I think so" he says quietly.

"What's your name?"

"Um, Eddie."

"Eddie" she checks her attendance sheet. "Do you know your last name?"

"Munson" he says, hoping he's in the right class.

Her smile falters when she hears his last name. "Oh. Take your seat, and next time be on time."

Eddie was confused by her sudden reaction. She was kind at first. Did he do something wrong?

————————————————————————

Once Eddie did start getting dropped off on time, he'd notice the other parents watching and whispering.

At recess he sat on the swing-set next to a boy who sat alone. He was excited at the prospect of making a new friend, especially since he seemed like he was on his own too.

"Hi I'm Eddie" he smiles at the boy excitedly, his small dimples poking out.

"Hi, um my parents told me not to talk to you." he says with a pout.

"Oh. Why?" Eddie says, his smile almost gone.

"I dunno. They said your dad's a bad guy and that means you are too."

"But I'm not a bad guy." Eddie says with a sad expression.

"I don't want to get in trouble. Sorry." he walks away.

————————————————————————

Later on, Eddie's drawing in his room and Elizabeth comes in.

"Hey baby what are you drawing?" Liz says.

Eddie perks his little head up to look at his mother lovingly. "A dragon" he answers.

"That's a scary dragon! Gonna take it to school and show your friends?" she asks sweetly.

Eddie pouts.

"What's wrong?" she notices his expression.

"I don't have friends, mama" he says sadly. "The other kids stay away from me because dad's a bad guy. They think I am too."

Liz sighs. "Dad's not a bad guy, baby. He just...doesn't make the best choices. Don't worry about what those other kids think. You're the most kind-hearted boy I know."

Eddie smiles. "Mama can you keep reading our story for me?"

Liz smiles. "Of course! Go get comfy."

Eddie climbs onto his bed excitedly and gets comfortable as Liz grabs The Hobbit from his bedside table and sits next to him.

————————————————————————

Over the years, Eddie took his mom's advice to ignore what people thought of him. He played into the troublemaker reputation he had by being overtly eccentric and nonconformist. It attracted others who felt like outcasts and he made sure his friends never felt defective like he did. Still, his treatment over the years sometimes crept its way into the way he thought about himself.

Once he moved in with Wayne, he'd give him the same reassurance he got from his mom. Wayne knew how much people hated Eddie in their small town, and it only drove him to make sure he loved Eddie more than that. Eddie knew it.

The way people treat Eddie in LA makes him feel tolerated. Liked, even. It's so different from what he's used to that it felt unreal, like it's all play pretend. It makes him feel like an imposter whenever he thinks about it for too long. He wonders if he'd still be dealing with this mindset if he had moved out of Hawkins as a kid. He wonders if he'll always feel trapped in Hawkins, even when he's hundreds of miles away.

[tremblingmuse]

hi! i was wondering if i could request a fic? it would be wally x reader. the prompt would be y/n having nightmares about her death and wally comforts her and talks to her and then holds her while she sleeps which stops the nightmares. if not that’s totally ok. thank you. :)

Ofcs babe it sounds so cute!

Also this one went off the rails I’m not gonna lie but I’ve been working on it on and off for days and it just needs to be posted at this point. Enjoy.

Nightmares and late swims

The sting of death is still fresh long after it’s over. It presents itself in a lot of different ways. Like anger, or humor. Or nightmares.

Y/n died in shop class, falling off a ladder. She wakes up to a sleep jerk every time she sleeps. Ghosts may not need sleep, but every so often she’s hopeful to sleep through the night.

Tonight, her hope was misplaced.

She gasped awake, disoriented and dizzy. The room was pitch black. She accidentally rolled off the couch in the teachers’ lounge, not knowing which way was up.

“Ow!” She sounded, after tumbling into the coffee table.

Her eyes adjusted to the little light in the room. Reality finally crept its way in. She’s been dead for years, why was she still scared? She can’t get hurt anymore. Well, busting her face on the coffee table hurt.

The door swung open and hit the wall. She shot up from her place on the floor.

“Y/n? You okay?” Wally huffed from the doorway. He was running.

“What? Yeah, yeah I’m fine.” Y/n rubbed her face, still not totally awake.

Wally saw that she was on the floor, he walked over to help her back onto the couch.

“I heard screaming.” He whispered, brushing hair out of her face.

She sighed. Y/n never wanted to bother him with the nightmares. The past was past. She shouldn’t be having them.

“It was a nightmare, it’s nothing.” She assured, with shaking hands and washed out skin. Beads of sweat trickled down her forehead.

Wally saw the state she was in. It wasn’t nothing.

He pulled her into his side, he was relieved to see her. But he was also sad. He had a few nightmares over the years. They were scary, it’s worse when you feel like you can’t talk about them.

“I get them sometimes. You don’t have to pretend to be fine.”

She looked at him with surprise. Wally gets nightmares? But he’s always so happy.

“I just feel like I’m falling. They’re not necessarily scary.” Her voice shook.

You don’t have to pretend to be fine.

It was a hard message to swallow. Because she did. Who was she to bother him with something like nightmares?

“That sounds terrifying to me.” He reassured.

She let herself break down. Tears swelled in her eyes and she finally hugged him back.

“I’m so sick of it.” She cried.

She was tired of not being able to sleep, tired of waking up in the middle of the night. It was eating away at her.

“What do you do?” She asked.

“What?” He asked, it understanding the question.

“When you have a nightmare, what do you do?” She asked again.

He took a moment to think. He had a answer.

“Well, I think about you. Takes my mind of it it.”

She laughed, she couldn’t help it.

“Why are you laughing?” He questioned.

“Of course you’d find a way to flirt with me.”

Wally was a flirt, he’d try and be slick about it. But she always saw through him. He was always trying to impress her, always saying things like that.

“I’m not- no. I’m not flirting I’m serious.” He caught her laughter.

“So, are you suggesting I think about myself when I have a nightmare or….”

“You’re cruel.” He sighed.

“Sorry. I have trouble accepting help. If you didn’t notice.” She apologized.

“It’s okay.”

Y/n had an idea.

“How about we do something else?”

“Like what?”

She was getting tired of sitting there feeling sorry for herself. So she dragged him to the pool.

“I’ve never swam at night before. Thought it would be fun!” She pulled off her shirt.

Wally turned around.

“Oh come on.” She rolled her eyes. “Never seen a bra before?”

“I just wasn’t expecting that.” He kept his gaze to the other side of the room.

“You’re being dramatic.” She pulled off her shorts. “It’s no different from a swimsuit.”

She climbed into the pool, it was cold.

“Uh, yeah it is.” He told her in a duh tone.

“Yeah? How?” She asked, happily splashing.

He stammered for an answer. Technically it wasn’t any different.

“Just cause.” He mumbled.

She laughed at him and dipped under the water. When she came up he was still standing there.

“Are you getting in?” She asked.

He rolled his eyes and peeled off his shirt. She enjoyed the view.

Wally was starting to get behind the idea of a late night swim. But then she splashed him.

He looked at her, jaw dropped with betrayal. She wore a shitfaced grin.

He had an idea.

He cannonballed right next to her, splashing her. It was on.

She grabbed a pool noodle and hit him as soon as he came up for air. “Ow! Dude!”

“You almost jumped right on top of me!” She hit him again.

“Oh what’ll happen? You’ll drown?” He dodged.

“In spirit!”

The slashing war was intense. It seemed as though y/n had the upper hand until Wally picked her up and threw her.

“That’s cheating!” She gasped, wet hair in his face.

“You have a weapon!” He motioned to the pool noodle.

“It’s a floatation device!” She argued.

[aby55-of-the-ab5o1ute]

This is just gonna be one big vent. with a lot of stuff. I'm not focusing on one thing.

I'm so tired of being host. I'm tired of waking up. I'm tired of existing.

But if I leave then whoever steps up will not only have to deal with that tiredness but also the distance it sets between them and everyone else because everyone only likes Uzi Doorman. Sure some like Vally are liked.. but they don't come close to me. How I can't leave front without "I miss zizi" or whoever fronting feeling a sinking loneliness because of the exclusion since nobody knows our family as well as I do.

Hell even I feel lonely a lot of the time. Unseen, unloved, unwanted. I want to cling to people and never let go. I want to scream and sob and be whiny and be a kid. But I can't. I'm always repressing regression, even when regressed I prevent myself from slipping too young because I lose the ability to speak and probably get really annoying.. cause if I let myself slip that far completely it would mean I couldn't operate anything, like the laptop or such.

I miss how our system use to be. Uncaring of who fronted, no matter their source. Now we have to make sure its something our friends know because it becomes awkward and scary whenever they don't know the source because they're way more distant.

I wish we could be "more of a system". I wish we didn't all mostly act the same with barely any amnesia and I wish everything that happens in-sys didn't feel fake. I wish I could just curl up in Nori's lap and it didn't feel like I was faking it. I hear literally every other system and think "they're so much more real.." like how the fuck are we a system?? Sure you can argue a few alters act different but that's because nobody fronts for more than a few hours besides me. So it could just be us faking the personality differences.

I hate being reminded that everyone else has a life besides us. Everyone else has friends outside of this friend group. Everyone else has things they do beside lie around and rot. Everyone else isn't pathetic. We're a disgusting freak who is sad and fat and ugly and rude.

We're failing at everything. I'm tired of being a failure. I'm tired of having to live up to being a gifted kid like we once were. I'm TIRED OF HEARING "Oh she does so well! She's quiet and nice and polite!" IM TIRED OF IT. WE ARE STRUGGLING. YOU JUST DON'T FUCKING NOTICE.

Life is terrible. I'm done.

If you think we vent a lot then oh you have NO FUCKING IDEA. we keep a LOT of vents to ourself.

[d-nessi]

CHAPTER 2

<3 ONLY US <3

A/N:

I really tried hard to put a lot of sweets, fluff and flirty things in. also a bit of drama (rly just a bit)

minimum of swearing.

Wordcount: 2k

proofread?: not really

as always I'm german so I hope my English is not that boring <333

the title of this chapter is the name of the song bella sang together with jacob fawler <333 I LOVE HER VOICE WHEN SHE SINGS!!! >__<

(this is not my video on yt :) )

also I use HE/SHE (just because I forget sometimes and also love using all)

and I can`t find if skipper is male/female so I tried to avoid the pronouns.

summary: You just want to enjoy the time until bella have to leave but things changes fast!

so fast you can`t even realize what just happen with both of you. time runs out too fast and things gonna be flirty and heating up your both blood more and more.

pairing: Bella Ramsey x FemReader

A bark comes from the other side of a door. Not any door….BELLAS door. yes I meet her at her Home.

The door opens and a little barking dog runns all around me excited to meet me. As soon as Bellas voice echoed in my ears skipper just sits beside her while she gets prepared for the walk.

"morning", bella says and put on the leash on skipper. "good morning" I greet her.

"isnt it a bit too cold outside for shorts?" I look at her with worries in my eyes. "its ok. I`m often outside, got an active immunsystem" he giggles proudly as we all start to walk into the beautiful world that is surrounded by huge trees, mountains and a small and absolutely clear river.

I look at skipper and smile. "I saw the post of yours on Insta. it is awesome that you adopted skipper."

"yeah skipper was on set and I instantly fell in love with the little cutie" she says happy while taking out the ball, throws it after making skipper off the leash.

"You both are such cuties" realizing I wasn't thinking I grab a stone and just throw it into the river while she looks like she's frozen for a moment with a noticable blush. Im moving on and can feel her gaze on me. Bellas heart starts to race and she tries to find the right words. "Y/N…What is this betwe---"

the mobile of her interrups suddenly the sentence I really wanted to hear.

"Ramsey hello?…….ah..yeah just go ahead…..no…sounds interresting…" that was a total lie. I can clearly see something is burden him.

"but how early?………in 2 days!?" he seems to getting really nervous.

"yes….no there is no problem. Will be there then…it`s still calgary?…ok yes thank you and see you there. bye" she puts her mobile back in her pocked obviously stressed out with a sad face.

"is everything ok? something happen?" I make my way to her as close as I can. "that was Neil Druckman….He asked if I could come sooner as he is currently casting a lot of people for Season 2 including the cast for Dina and he would like me to be there to make sure there is chemistry between me and the Dina cast."

Dont be a dick right now I thought to myself and put on the best fakesmile ever. "but that sounds good! Thats the best way to make this show even better." I pretend but yeah truly that wasn't a lie. "When earlier you must leave? in a week?" I don't realize how serious things getting right now.

"2 days…." she says in a frustrating way and grabs skippers leash only to move on quietly. "Bella…there will be friends on set right? pedro and all the new friends you gonna meet!

"I'll be gone for like 1 or 2 years. yeah great I mean....shit I cant believe this is happening!" she starts to arguing with a face as if Lady Mormont itself wanna cut your head of. Scary and so cute at the same time.

"But this is your chance to make it big again! what the hell is your problem!?" honestly right now Im really confused. She looks at me and I can feel my soul leaving my body.

"BUT you're not with me!"

oh…wait what? She looks at me like a puppy who got lost. "you're a really good friend and sometimes on set it's so boring. most of the time they want to do their work and after that Im in my hotelroom…just me." I am not shure if this is the true reason like…come on they seem to have so much fun on set.

Bu…did….did she just friendzoned me?

I could work from my Laptop I thought to myself and took a deep breath. "well how get we gonna managing this? in 2 days? I need to do some things that's left" I start

"I will talk to my manager and fix everything if you want" she looks at skipper who's just sitting beside her trying to comfort her. "that's huge bella" I admit but smile slightly at her."

"well ok so than lets start and get ready for the flight" I say calm and she smiles so bright even the sun seems dark. I look deep in her eyes and a red shade on her cheeks find its way.

Our way seperate after the walk and I manage to get work and flight together. There's only one problem………

Again a knock on the door. Skipper barks again and the door swings open.

"hey aaaah….." staying here infront of my future wife with all my luggage. "the flight is in two days Y/N" obviously looking confused.

" yeah there is only one thing. I gave notice of my apartment for a whole year, but that counts from today and not just in 2 days.

Now I'm standing here and wanted to ask you if I could sleep at your home." She laughs and let me in. "It's not very big and I only have one bed but I just sleep on the couch" she says while showing me around. "No no, I sleep on the couch, no problem." I just wave with my hands.

Looking to her there is this feeling again. I'm slowly but surely becoming aware of what it means to have this tingling sensation. it drives me crazy and the thought of being close to her is almost painful. I don't know where I stand with her anymore but definitely not in the 'come on let's cuddle zone'.

'FrIeNdZoNeD'

She just want to be friends with me. I hate my fucking feelings and I try my best to ignore.

I already thought she might feel the same but I was so wrong….so fucking wrong it makes me sick. Sometimes I wish I have a Damon that could just stop feeling any emotions but I just watched to much vampire diaries.

"it's late, I make some dinner and go shower. if you want we can watch a movie later." she grabs some ingredients in her kitchen.

"sounds good! You need a hand for something?"

"no it's ok. if you want you can shower first", he looks to me with a questioning face and I agreed.

"you have a towel? or is it enough to come out of the shower completely naked?" I simply ask cought him offguard looking completely blushing at all my words. here we go I can't stop teasing him.

While I'm in the shower I thought deeply about telling her how I feel. I just can't go with her and not even touch her for once. Being in love with someone you can't have is pure agony.

"smells good" I come out of the shower and really thought about to just tease her more and changing my clothes in front of her. I smirk and was about to drop my towel when she immediatly turns arround and disappears into the bathroom.

I giggle and take a bowl of food eating and waiting for her to come out. After 30 minutes I started to worry and went to the door.

"Bella are you ok?" I carefully listened to what she is saying. "Yes, everything is fine," she conveyed to me. Lie…….. and I didn't know that because she's sitting in the shower letting the water run over her the whole time. Bella was confused and she is more than aware of what is happening here. Too shy to admit what she's feeling, she prefers to swallow all the great feelings and hope it goes away. funny because that's absolutely hopeless. it's getting worse, more and also….she friendzoned me."shit…." she mumblet.

I make myself comfortable on the couch and wait impatiently when she finally comes out in an oversized hoodie and shorts. She gives me a nervous smile and sits on her bed with her bowl.

"ok movie..any favorite you want to watch?" I ask and wait for her to awnser. "I'v never watched Jurassic Park so why not this?" she ask and I agree.

I start the movie and make myself comfortable on her bed beside her ignoring my heartbeat that just dance like a fire in the wind. Bella looks to the TV and follows the story.

I lay back with my Hands behind my Head. Jeeeeezz I can feel the Air is getting more intense and I don't blame it cause hell there is sitting an absolutely beautiful guuurl beside me not knowing what I feel, not knowing that my heart gets electrocuted by her smile. I coul'd just take her face in my hands and kiss her blessed soul out of her.

I didn't even realize that my eyes only watching him. Studying every corner of his face and hell this is painfull when you can't do the things you really wan't to do. Thoughts are buzzing in my head that even scare me.

She's been looking at me…the whole time and I'm so preoccupied I don't even realize it. My heart is literally jumping and my whole body can't take the tension anymore.

"Don't you want to finish your question from the day before?" I say without averting my eyes.

"I already did…" she whispers as if trying with all her might to keep up the lie but failing.

"than say it…again" I come closer like I want to intimidate her.

She blushes and I can clearly hear her breath goes wild. I already know the answer and still words wouldn't be enough for me. The gap between us is getting smaller and smaller so that I can feel her breath on my lips when suddenly her mobile rings. AGAIN ..I swear that thing has something against us.

She completely shreeks up and takes her phone. She answers with a trembling voice. "H… hello? No, Mom, you're not disturbing me right now." Her face turned bright red, first looking at me and than very quickly to her lap. She can brush her mum off while I got up in time to have a drink. crap…. I just thought silently. It's getting late now, so I decide to lie down on the couch and turn off the TV.

"good night Y/N" she lays down in her bed and it's like I can hear still her breath.

As if the breathing almost becomes a whimper. I wake up and see that it is totally dark outside. a look at the clock tells me that it's already 2:42am. The whimper comes from Bella's direction so I just turn around again. Is she crying? I startle immediately and walk carefully to her bed. There she lies… curled up and asleep. She must be having a nightmare.

"No…" I only hear a very low murmur. Enough of that…. I just snuggle up with her under the covers behind her back. An arm wraps around her as I snuggle my face in her hair. She smells so good I have to keep my thoughts to myself. She feels me and startles, turning to me out of breath but hiding her face on my neck.

In the corner of my eye I can see that she is quite red with slight tears in her eyes. I just smile, caress her cheek and literally feel my heart want to erupt. I give her a hint of a kiss on the cheek and close my eyes as I wait for her breathing to become more regular.

There's only us…only you and me I thought smiling and fell asleep together with her in my arms.

WOOP WOOP that was soooo freak'n cute to write and that's just the beginning <333 there will be more Chapter and next chapter is getting moooore snuggle loveydovey <333 :P

For more Chapters, stories and more just look at my Masterlist ♡

[all-or-nothing-baby]

15 QUESTIONS, 15 (or whatever) TAGS

i was tagged by @ash-mcj—thanks dude! HERE is their's.

.

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYBODY?

my middle name is the name of my mum's friend/dad's ex who died (my folks ended up getting together a year later).

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?

about 10 minutes ago? to WELLY BOOTS which is an amazing devil song i've heard 10,000 times before. i honestly cry a gajillion times a day bc i don't just cry at sad stuff but also anything that moves me: from hearing a wonderful piece of music... to someone saying something kind to me or anybody else (real person or fictional character)... to being overwhelmed by the enormity of life and all its fucked-up and wonderful complexities... seriously, absolutely bloody everything makes me cry!

3. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?

yes, two of 'em; a brilliant, beautiful, super-talented, immensely kind and outrageously hilarious 24 year old and a brilliant, beautiful, super-talented, immensely kind and outrageously hilarious 15 year old :) they're incredibly different individuals who bicker like siblings absolutely should and love each other a lot. i love them both so much it makes me cry when i think about it (surprise surprise).

4. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT?

oh, no, never. (probs too much at times—although i don't always understand when others are using it with me #neurodiversesquad).

5. WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY/HAVE YOU PLAYED?

used to do what the american folks call 'run track', back in the day before chronic illnesses became the villain in my story.

6. WHAT'S THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT SOMEONE?

whether they, you know, get it (or not).

7. EYE COLOUR?

erm, a bit of an odd sort of dark grey/blue with lots of dark green swirls and splodges

8. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?

oh definitely scary movies, horror my beloved <3 i think i'm finally (bc it's been on my list for so long omg) gonna get around to watching RELIC tonight! *scratching at the door noises*

9. ANY SPECIAL TALENTS?

forgetting absolutely fucking anything and everything all the fucking time. ALWAYS knowing the first letter of the word i can't think of. having a bit of a photographic memory. being able to play the william tell overture by flicking my fingernails against my front teeth. making really good pancakes. good at accents. pretty good at drawing faces. playing music by ear. great at making inconsequential lists lol

10. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?

blackpool, a seaside town in the north-west of england, UK. imo it's a veritable shithole these days, only good for trashy arcades and getting stabbed... but i do miss the ocean now i don't live there.

11. WHAT ARE YOUR HOBBIES?

making art, making words, making mixtapes, making trouble, making time for reading, making music, making a mess.

12. DO YOU HAVE PETS?

yes—i couldn't imagine not having critters in the house! i have 4 precious arseholes cats: little jimmy novak and moriarty, who are both house-loving cats—like, they do go out, but are indoors wanting cuddles more often than not. whereas the other two, grace jones ii and goku, are practically feral and only really come home for dinner and if it's raining hard (and the occasional i-will-allow-you-to-stroke-me-and-let-you-have-the-honour-of-me-sitting-on-your-knee-i-suppose).

13. HOW TALL ARE YOU?

5'2". short king.

14. FAVOURITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL?

loved art and english in high-school, and also enjoyed drama and history. i studied art at college and fashion at uni (which was a mistake, that world was very much not for me pfft).

15. DREAM JOB?

i honestly don't dream of jobs. but if i did? i suppose a portrait artist or published poet who was paid enough to actually live on, aha.

.

tagging, play or nay: @shealynn88 @sharkfish @novemberhush @greyhavenisback @poebin @jmeelee @raisesomehale @rajalagang @ohhalefire @halinski @kikiroo @lovebillyhargrove @harrgrove @slytherkins @witchsickness @ltleflrt @wellwaterhysteria @deklo @chasingcastiel @racheld93 @gabedemon absolutely anybody else who wants to do the thing!

[bi-demon-ium]

S2 EP7 LIVEBLOG

TERRIFIED TERRIFIED

both at the summary and the little accidental spoilers ive gotten and just in general

ohhhh mr benedict is so obviously extremely nervous im sad

oh is she whammied

but is she whammied

big day tomorrow! lgfkjfgh

oh I think she got whammied

hes gonna be all “im sorry I couldn’t” and then shes like “okay!” bc whammied lmao

LKFGJFGHFH OH NO

SHE IS WHAMMIED THEN

oh this is terrifying

OHHHH HIS REACTION

“ARE YOU… HAPPY?”

HE LOOKS UPSET ABOUT IT

AND SHE LAUGHS OHHHH

oh kate you and your code w—DFLGKKJDFGKJFGH MILLIGAN GOT IT I LOVE THEM

“agreed”

I love them so much

“thank you for not fighting me on this” is she really though. or is it a trick

RUN SILENT, RUN DEEP. ALWAYS. OHHH

LOSING MY MIND

she set a timer lkdfjg yeah she’s definitely tricking them

oh reynie. naïve sweet summer child

but of course immediately willing to go along with things

LJDFGLKDGJKDJGKGJFGH

STRAITJACKETS

“REALLY”

AND CONSTANCE’S HUGE BEAM

“take them off. now.”

this is so funny what the fuck

jeffers cant even get out of it lfkghjfkghj

lkdfgjfg JEFFERS HELP

“just pull it” “…oh” and adjusting his sweatER

SDGKLJDGF CONSTANCE DFDFGDG JUST WRENCHING IT OFF AND JEFFERS JUST STARING DOWN FOR A SECOND

you’re EVIL

“oh! sticky! friend!”

hair loss lkjfglkjfghhg

ohhh youre gonna try and whammy sticky

I bet sticky isn’t affected bc he was whammied last time

more experience resisting

THEME SONG! AAAAAA

im so anxious I feel like im gonna throw up dljgfkjghhh

LDKGJFLKGJH THE HIGH KICK

ldkgj but when I think about it I want to resist OHHHH

“what if everything is just fine” “oh that sounds lovely”

SINGING????? GIRL

WHAT IS HAPPENING

AND HIS ANXIOUS REACTION LIKE HES SMILING BUT ALOS LIKE ????????

singing with her ohlkfgjhkfgjh this hurts me a bit

its adorable but also cringe

WOLVES??? OUCH LMAO DLKFJGDG

“RHONDA, IT’S A SAIL!”

HUGGGG DKGLJFLKGHJFGLH

DFKLGJDGJ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HUGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AND THERE WAS EVEN ONE WITH MILLIGAN!!!!!!!!!!

from a distance but still

the fabled rags of a hostage lkdjfglkdfjg

I KNOW????

SHE REQUESTED YELLOW

OF COURSE SHE DID

oh fuck auguste

is he gonna whammy all of them?????

a horse camel? did she just say horse camel?

“does it bother you to lie to him?” coming from reynie…. ohhh…

“just because you had to do something doesn’t mean you cant feel bad about it” “maybe I do feel bad”

LDKFJG I LOVE HOW EVERYONE KEEP ROASTING CURTAIN’S FASHION

RIGHTFULLY SO

sticky<3 nerd

I wonder if she does enjoy the scientific facts in one way or another she would just normally never admit it

LDKFGJKDFJG CONSTANCE

LSKFGJRFG [HUGS] “…….whats wrong with her” “curtain did it”

her wide eyed look of distress

terrifying , constance

“it’s highly unsettling” “it’s been great” oh sticky rip

HE STARTED DOING LONG DIVISION DLFKGJDLKFGJD

I LOVE HIM SO MUCH WHAT A NERD

also love how each of the mjust walked in and immediately found who they were looking for

its gonna be like “im not putting those on” [cut to those on]

ohhh

jackson and jillson’s abruptly stopped clapping ldgkjfghjfghfg

oh milligan’s smile is terrifying

and rhonda’s hair!!! oh I love her

I love that squinting face reynie makes when of the other says something wild

uh oh someone’s neck hurting! that’s bad

oh darlings. they’re not undercover.

LKDJFGLKJDFGKJDGF

IM SORRY THE CUT TO THE FROZEN GUY LFKGHJFGH

also curtain’s reaction + jackson and jillson being insane dlfkgjgfd

ohhh mr benedict is noticing something’s wrong

ohh just missed the kids

NICKY

OHHHHHHHH

is he okay?

are you sure?

“they seem… very happy to be with you”

ohh of course it would be concern for someone that would break through to him. of course it would be. god

another hug<33

terrifying! I mean expected but terrifying

milligan’s is somehow the scariest though the smile is so terrifyingly wide

it looks so scary and uncharacteristic I hate this

angsty horrific hug !

and rhonda my darling you look so good

god I mean we been knew this would be terrifying but it really is terrifying

“formed by suffering”????? OHHH

also telling constance she’s better as she is whammied.. I think they’re just trying to keep going without arguing but still. ouch

SHE WAS THE BRAINS LMAO

SHE STOLE THE JOURNAL DIDN’T SHE

YEAH SHE DID LMAO

I LOVE HER SO MUCH

ohhh mr benedict seeing all of this spying on them fglkhjfgh

also jackson and jillson continue to be.

wonderful

STOP YELLING AT THEM

LDKJGKLDFJG MARLON

“sleepers”

curtain’s visible “oh fuck” face ldkfgjkflghjgfh

DON’T BRING ME A PROBLEM WITH NO SOLUTION? SIR?

IM ATTACKING YOU

MR BENEDICT AND CONSTANCE REUNION!!!

hug <33

also garrison versus curtain journals ldkfjgg

IVE SUCCESSFULLY STOLEN SEVERAL ITEMS RECENTLY

cool little building montage!

THE THING MILLIGAN GAVE HER

ITS GONNA BE THE MULTI TOOL

SMALL MOVABLE BUILT TO LAST

YEAH

FUCK

FUCK YEAH!

“positive thinking” ironically

LKDFJG and then her follow up

MR BENEDICTS BACK IN THE CROWD???

lkdfjg and the dancing…. oh dear

and i know i should feel something ubt i couldn’t but that terrified me but i was relieved to feel the terror ohhhh

contemporary jazz and welsh folk style

“utterly THOUGHTFUL! ……what is it”

“iiii. don’t see anything :)”

ohhh his face… oh god

“you deliberately misled at the gates”

he didn’t even say anything about being brainwashed

MISS PERUMAL HELPING LFKHJFGH

all of their reactions the second they’re unwhammied….god

“IM VIBING”

“and I do. with my life”

JACKSON AND JILLSON DLKFGJDFGFGHFGH

“perspective ON the perspective!”

oh no bc mr benedicts been under the longest

oh god they’re not gonna unwhammy him are they

LKDJFRGLKDJGDLKGJDGLHKJFGH

THEY JUST FUCKING TACKLED HIM

JILLSON DISLOCATED HER GODDAMN SHOULDER???

oh no but it broke

I have a feeling it didn’t work

OH NO

and not constance either

oh auguste’s weird awkward little wave

“she gets a vote now???” “..she does :/”

CHOP OFF ITS HEAD

“…us” :)

ohhh

lkdfjgkjg hes practicing in the mirror

oh is he trying to hypnotize himself? or s he practicing

LKJDFLGKJDLFKG

TRANQUILIZER DART

“what? [sees dart] oh. I see.” [CRASH]

also FLOWER DELIVERY

love that I was right about them kidnapping curtain<3

I have a bad feeling that this isn’t going to go as planned

although love that they just have curtain in a little bundle. amazing

I love that they immediately jump to the right conclusion

aww they’re all asleep in a big pile

OH NOOOO HIS NECK

OH NOOOOO I MEAN I KNEW IT WAS COMING BUT FUCK

DISTRESS DISTRESS DISTRESS

[naalamuse]

This is about youu, chunke!

I have talked about you to few people a million times that they doesnt want to hear your name from my mouth anymore. You are the indirect situationship i had that i cant stop thinking about. but this post is the end to it. all this time i have never been fully honest but this tine, its gonna be real.

okay, you met me at a vulnerable point of time. i was in a relationship maly into that person. i even planed a life with him, wanted to settle down and even arrived at a date 2031 to get married with him. the number of kids everything. I loved him, and i dont hsve any grudges now.

But, in college i was unhappy. i always ran to my bf in phone(i had a b set in first year) and talked to him. i was scared of everybody. I had severe issues ands i judged me a lot. i did notice you and i liked you for some reason. like i knew i would like to be friends with you.

Mybe it was becuase you were friendly with everyone and i wanted to be like that. but i was so scared and when you did approach me(just like others) i ran away, or i ignored. later on you told me that i looked like i had no interest. the truth was that i was so interested that i knew i would ruin it or people will see through me, or already is seeing my weaknesses.

then we started talking. how? yh you talked to me at my weakest times. what happened was that i was so sad and i was scared of people that i was crying that day, and you understood. so yopu asked ...i guess.

I was pretty surprised. i still remember the haopiness. becayse someone noticed and that someone was alrady liked by me.

and we started tal;kinhg.

we started talking so much that we even talkede about deep stuff. i talked about my sexual stuffs, and you were too re assuring. ytpu said i was your bestfriend and thats the reason why you are telling all that. i was also happy to hear that. i loved you a lot but not like in a relationship way because at that time also i was in a relationship i was talking about yopu to him. he was happy too. that's another story.anywqays we became close. i trusted you.

the things we talked include stuff that normal people done really share. or atleast i wouldnt have. thats why i was so attached with you.then all of a sudden, some stuffs changed.

i hink i fely bad when you asked me for friends with benefits in t or d game. i then tried to make it nrmal but it never bvecame. so it was weird.

but it really hurt me. i was scared and i even asked you later on and ypu said you didnt tell anyone but maybe am hallucinating bvut sometimes i feel like evryone knopws./ i am scared of that?

but am rembvvboning all that scary parts for now. and ever. even if the world knows about things , the intimate stuff, its not the worst thing ever. its not okay but i can deal with t. i dont want to be ashamnerd of my self. sex isnt npothing to be ashamed of and sicussing it with a best friewnd who i thought so is ok. noww what?after that i did trell that all out to others when i got druk. that was sick of me. i shouldnt have done that. adu vendarnu.,

i dont want to keep grudges too.i became obsessed wiht him, thought about a lot an ffinally fell for him. i fell for him becuase he left me and made e feel s[epacial and nothing at the same time. it all happened oin 2021 and here i am in 2023 stiull thinking about him.

okay, this is an open letter to you. i realy liked you. i wanted you to be there i m,y life. i liked you i really mean it. i had grudge too, a bit. but i liked you thats the truth. but i am letting you go, because i liked you because iogf my own trauma and theres nothing about you that i actually want. i don not like you, i just like the idea. i didnt want to progress in my life becauyse i wasnt ready so i took you asnd putr ypu asxz my love or something. nbnow its gone becuaeeam not stupid anymore. no more all that. i have a life so i doint have time for this anymore.

i am not gonna say this to anyone, that i wrote here and all, because no one needs to now. only myself.

my bigger regret is telling people about it, it was a mistake and to rectify it, i need to stop all this.

you are not in my mind anymore. i am so happy tpo finaaly allopwing myself to breath and toi stop in this day dream. once i stop day dreaming about you, i can start living my life.

i am following you on instagram, lets see. am donme with you ansd fpfgr that i can allow myelf that.

ok i followed you, you are having a public ac.

i am finally ready to live my life without neing revolved around by you.

[mocha000]

"I’ve been trying to experiment with different types of intimacy and sex in my writing" Ooh ok! "Tbh- I think one of the reasons why the m/c, Tae, and Hobi have this obsession with flowers is because the three of them have a touch of seasonal depression and really really thrive when the weather is nice, so the pack indulging them is very much them helping their pups not feel the winter scaries so much <3" Aww

"Oooh I did not mean the m/c and Namjoon’s little porch snippet to be sexual more like- fond-" Ohh lol "but now that I’m thinking it I wonder who would actually be brave enough to fuck on the porch and why is it jk and the m/c 😂" lol! "sometimes when I’m writing I get very vivid ideas for dialogue and I have to find a way to work them into the story and this was one of those cases <3" i really like them! "I like it when Yoongi’s dialogue is a little lighter- like in the part where he’s talking about what kind of cat he’d be too!" ooh true, my sweet baby.

"the others can’t always count on spending time with each other or together- but at the end of the day the mc and Tae always always always take off each others makeup together and do a meadow report of their days <3 just girls being besties and lovers <3" too sweet omg. "Nothing can stay perfect for long (although I have to admit I was tempted to give them a little bit of something before she passed out)" Noo, oh well. "Honestly Jin is not going to let Namjoon forget that he stole his pup- Namjoon is gonna be put through the ringer by Jin the next chapter. He is an icky little nest thief! The audacity! Ooh ok lol

"The part about Yoongi having no hair if he was a cat is inspired by my cat because while the rest of her hair is fairly long and thick…her tail has always been too short and not very fluffy 😂" Oh lol i never noticed that (unless the cat isn't the gray one u've shown recently) "she’s lying next to me as I type this response and I get to squish her little toes between sentences." ahhhh so cute. i love cat toe beans.

"Jk is like a Jin whisperer irl and in bily like- I love the he just /gets/ him, I think they’re like deceptively close you know? Like there where so many years where it was just the two of them before the m/c 🥺 they’re so cute." aww. "The m/c’s nose/scent stuff is kinda funny- but I lowkey think it’s her body just being like “you are about to get dicked down for several days without breaks, eat a fucking meal for once” like it’s her survival instincts that are making her not able to smell Namjoon because she needs to bulk up before her heat." ohh lol

"she lowkey convinces jk and tae to dye her hair purple when she’s like 7 or so and ends up keeping it until high school- like a deep deep plum that goes over her natural black hair- I think the floors in the downstairs bathroom end up completely fucked because she spills hair dye once. No one gets mad at her Yoongi just replaces the flooring 😭" cute lol purple hair since 7 is such a long time.

"I think with the interjections! I like that it feels like it gives info quick!" Yeah. "If it’s not too much I’ll keep doing it!" yes please. (i only get a little sad if i want more details) "Thank you so much for another wonderful comment! At this point, all my energy to update comes from you and like three other people <3 I know that I say this every time but- really! thank you for sticking around <3 I don’t think I would have kept writing this story for so long if it wasn’t for you! Its one of the reasons why I try to respond to your messages first <3" Aww TT

Before I Leave You (Pt.74)

(Omegaverse au, Mafia au, Bts x Reader)

Summary: A planned vacation with Namjoon might not offer the respite you hope it will; Something is wrong with Jin and he just wont say what.

Tags: Hurt/comfort, Harmless Sickfic, So much fluff, Light angst, Brief smut, brief mentions of intercrural sex, slick, a bit of spanking, implied d/s, under negotiated scene but everyone is okay with it, Mommy kink, mommy tae, baby dom tae, Brief daddy kink too, implied yandere Jin, obsessive behavior, controlling behavior, discussions of free use, free use! jungkook, clothing control, dollification if you squint, forced caretaking if you squint, nudity, voyeurism, exhibitionism, teasing, implied omegaspace, preheats,

W/c: 21.1k

A/n: Sorry for the delay in getting this chapter out <3 the last couple of weeks have been...not great! Here it is! I will repay you guys with my hiatus by giving you possibly the longest bily chapter ever! The heat arc will take two more chapters! No idea how long those will be but i greatly enjoyed making this chapter the fluffiest little bundle of scenes I could. i did not hold back- i think we've all needed a bit of softness.

Previous part - Masterlist - First part

You are belly down in the nest when you first come too.

Your chest is pressed to the cuddle of blankets dragged beneath your tummy. Soft and cozy, warm breath tickling the back of your neck. Your sweet sweet omega packmates have made you the best nest in existence. Comfy and plush, you can sense the high walls and the care that they put into the placement of every pillow.

The scents from both of them (milk and honey) flutter past your consciousness, tugging you down and down, covering you like a physical shadow. So sweet you want to roll around in it.

If only you had the energy for it, your body feels like a lead weight.

You're not alone here but you might as well be for how scent-drunk you are. Can omegas get scent drunk on other omegas? Distantly you can hear voices talking. Downstairs? Or in the dressing room? your brain moves sluggishly, not a single coherent thought filling your head other than how truly comfortable you are.

It’s perfect, Jinnie and Koo are the best at nest-making.

Your inner omega is not entirely satisfied until you can smell all of your pack, you nuzzle forward to search for them. The soft fabric by your pillow smells like Yoongi- like chocolate. Sweet and heady and almost melty. The cinnamon and caramel and coffee are harder to pick out, the vanilla less so because Jimin had suctioned himself to your back in the night, nosing at your shoulders until he settled. The whole nest smells like your pack. Smell safe, smells like home.

Someone has opened up the curtains early (or is it late into the morning?) rather meanly. Soft light turns yellow behind your eyelids. You shield your face from the light in a blanket that smells like Tae. Burrowing underneath it and hiding.

Something warmer and less ephemeral than sunlight dances up and down your spine. Arresting your escape into dreamland and waking you gently. Rubbing harder with every moment.

“Honey.”

You huff, voicing your protests at being woken. Screwing your eyes shut.

“Pup” Yoongi stresses. You chirp, a little bratty. He huffs a fond sigh before really putting his hands to use gripping you under your ribs to lift you up gently.

Or at least trying too. You flop back against the blankets limp, refusing to open your eyes. Fingers tangled in the nest like a child would clutch at a well-loved stuffed animal (there are well-loved stuffed animals here, mostly ringing the nest like little soldiers, your addition to the nest). Your body feels so good- listless and tired and sleepy. You don’t answer your mate with more than a grumble, trying to turn back over. Tummy, you need to be on your tummy.

Yoongi laughs, actually laughs, and despite your best efforts you start to wake you do starts to feel more awake. His sleepy giggle and the flutter of your heart is better than an alarm clock.

Why stay asleep when you have so much to wake up to? Your mind doesn’t get the memo, remaining fuzzy and sluggish.

“Sweetheart, you’re going to be late and…” Something smells very very sweet, almost syrupy on the air. You don’t mind the smell, but Yoongi smells a little sour. A little stress bitter- more 87% dark chocolate and not hot chocolate goodness. What could he possibly have to be stressed about when the nest feels like this? All he has to do is nest and he'll be right as rain, you wish you could tell him that, but your mouth remains sleep-slack and pouty.

His hand holds your hip, keeping your legs closed. Keeping your legs from parting. You cling to the pillow that smells like Tae. Intent on putting it between your legs and hugging it and not him if your mate is going to be mean and wake you.

But Yoongi doesn’t let you. Yoongi stops you.

“You’re gonna get it all over the bed and that if you’re not careful, and if you do Jin definitely isn’t gonna let you go with Namjoonie without giving you a scolding. And you know how he likes his scolding’s-”

Your body warms and sweetens, You bring your legs together, intent on pushing up in the nest and telling him off. But it’s then that you feel it. The cold, the wetness of slick between your legs.

Oh

You sit up so quick the room spins. Hair fluffing, all cowlicky and messy all over your head. You look first at Yoongi then anxiously between your thighs where the grey fabric of your pajamas has already darkened.

You’re not proud of the way that you slam the bathroom door in Yoongi’s face. His voice is muffled and worried. “It’s alright- it happens with Jin and Jungkook sometimes too, leaking slick is perfectly normal-”

You whine, high-pitched, embarrassed. cutting him off. “Give me a second! I’m fine just-” You keep your hands pressed to the door, holding it closed. Yoongi waits for a breath and the doorknob stops turning. You can hear his sigh from the other side of the door.

Someone opened up the window in the bathroom and you're thankful now- the scent of your slick is not quite so cloyingly sweet. Cold spring air tickles your toes, at odds with the heated flooring.

“Alright, want me to keep the others away?”

“Yes, please and thank you.” Your head hits the door. Resting your forehead against the wood.

A bit of slick trails down your thigh, threatening to land on the floor. You make an alarmed noise.

“Can you get me some clean clothes?”

“Oh yeah, shit- Sorry-”

There are bathing suits hanging on the side of the deep tub- from you and Tae and Hobi last night. from when you'd used the hot tub out on the balcony and soaking away your soreness last night. One of them slides to the floor (Tae’s, bright pink, crusted with pearls like a mermaid) as you hobble to the toilet. Feeling embarrassed and thankful that no one’s there to see you.

You’d gotten kissy and overheated in the tub. Water bubbling around you and concealing your wandering hands. Tae’s bathing suit pulled to the side and yours too eventually. Leaving Hobi pink-cheeked and watching from the other side- teasing himself with the distance.

Until they’d both sandwiched you. Bottoms pulled to the side under the water. Both of your alpha's working in tandem. Knots pressing between the chub of your thighs and sometimes up into the slick plush of your pussy lips. Neither of them slipped inside because you’d said you didn’t want it- that you just wanted to be teased.

And tease they had; with Tae’s cock sliding up between your body and the fabric of your bikini, sat upon her lap. Hobi’s mouth, trailing down the front plunge of your bikini and taking it off eventually. Both of them breathing heaving and nibbling.

You’d felt like a chew toy in the best way. Soft- turned on, not nervous, not anxious. Because neither of them seemed to have any intent on fucking you or knotting you or had been at all upset when you said you didn’t want to fuck. That you just wanted to be touched and nothing else.

You really liked it, being touched without it going anywhere. It’s not exactly surprising that you’d had what surely must have been a wet dream after.  

Yoongi had complained a bit about having to drain the water out of the tub when you’d come in dizzy and body humming, carefully corraled between your two pink-cheeked alphas, but you know he hadn't actually been upset. Just teasing.

You and Yoongi haven't been intimate in that way since your fight and blow-up and then eventual reconciliation but at least the kisses have been lingering and slow and not without heat. The regular intimacy is back, the cuddling too- and you know it's only a matter of time until that part of your relationship unfurls again.

Neither of you are in any sort of rush. You've taken your last three showers with him, had shampooed his hair and shaved his scratchy chin last shower, with him sitting on the shower bench and you standing between his legs. Yesterday after Tae and Hobi had dragged you into the hot tub.

But he hadn't taken you, even though his eyes had been on you and his hands had touched a little softer, a little longer. and he knew exactly what you'd just been doing with tae and hobi by your scent alone. His cock hadn't been completely soft against his thigh but he hadn't asked or initiated anything. Neither had you.

Granted, You hadn’t wanted to be sore for your and Namjoon’s travel day today. Yoongi is a very very considerate mate and packmate.

Now you sit on the edge of the toilet and pull down your pants, cringing when you see the mess of slick that soaks your pj's and darkens the fabric from grey to black. You wonder if it's just the stress of travel and leaving your pack or if there are other things at play here.

Given how you’d forgotten about your and Namjoon’s first date until several weeks after having made the plans for it- it's a little predictable that you’d also forgotten your plans to go on a little vacation with the pack alpha. Granted you'd made your plans shortly before you’d tried to leave them, and that had also kinda distracted both of you, but tomato tamato.

It’s been three months since all of that went down. Springtime is well on its way. The trees are going to leaf out any moment now and join the blooming cherry blossom and crabapple trees and magnolias that dot your section of town. You can barely walk with Hobi to work anymore without him pointing out the magnolia trees and promising that he'll plant one in your front yard before the summer is over.

Soon but not quite yet.

It’s the blooming trees that had actually inspired your trip with Namjoon; Namjoon got the idea when you’d been driving with him to another doctor’s appointment. You'd been quiet, nervous, nose pressed to the window to watch for trees, and you'd asked him to slow down so that you could look longer at the pink tangles of trees along the waterfront.

Namjoon loves to indulge.

You’d perused Airbnb’s together, knitted close one evening on the couch, a glass of wine and Jungkook’s pinky tucked into one limb and Namjoon pressed close on the other. Tae’s laptop balanced on his thighs and Jin on his other side. Because even if your packmates wouldn't be coming- they still want a hand in the planning. The nosey bunch that they are.

You’d planned it out with Jin watching with hawk eyes and deeming certain packages too pedestrian for you, not fancy enough or not romantic enough. You’d finally landed on a hot spring, up north- apparently known for its secluded views and cherry blossoms at this time of year.

Appropriately bougie and appropriately brief at 3 days and 2 nights but special enough for what Namjoon had dubbed your first anniversary present.

You’d talked about it, tangled up with Namjoon on the front porch under about a dozen blankets just to watch the birds getting fat and happy on spring suet and seeds. Hobi hung up the birdfeeders there just for you and Namjoon to enjoy on your mornings.

You and Namjoon watch the birds often on the front porch, now that it's warm enough to sit out here for extended stretches. With him working so infrequently, you've been able to spend a lot more time with him.

Your love with him has always been slower, gentler than the others. Namjoon loves being delicate with you and loves treating you like the fine china that you are. You feel the delicacy in the way he touches you all the time and in the way that he encourages your slow mornings.

Your mouth rounded out and kissed pink from his mouth a second ago, kissing you when the birds don’t linger near the feeder so that your squeaks don’t spook them. Your shirt pulled up as you slid down the cushion, bare skin that Namjoon’s fingers had teased at. A touch just to touch. Tickling at your ribs until you giggle at him to stop.

Petting up and down your sides, he can’t feel your ribs anymore. Hasn’t been able to in months. He indulges in the feeling of your soft skin while you watch the birds flutter. “I don’t know if we can call May our anniversary, you didn’t kiss me really until June.”

“Doesn’t matter, We met in May.”

You'd snorted, "thats not an anniversary Joonie. What was it love at first sight?"

"No," Namjoon says, honest, but that's why you love him, leaning in nose had pressed against your mating mark, sniffing deeply. Letting out a satisfied grumble. "Maybe home at first sight though. I think I could already feel it- that you and Yoongi were mated. I think I just didn’t want to admit it to myself yet.”

Anniversaries and special days aside. The rest of the pack had been predicably jealous when you'd shown them the pictures of the hotel. Not too jealous- because the pack has another vacation in the works at the end of the summer. An idea that’s only just starting to crest their minds. Why shouldn’t they travel now? They don’t have pups- and this might be one of the last summers they have.  

Tae had leaned in over Namjoon’s computer, “Wait this is so pretty- and for photos! I want to go look at all the pink” She’d whined. Jimin had just shaken his head and leaned close to press a kiss to her temple to distract her. Almost hitting one of Tae’s space buns in the process.

“We can always go to the botanical gardens for pictures honey.”

“Yeah! That way you can show me when we get back! and we'll have pictures to show each other” You’d chirped, trying to be comforting.

Sometimes in the pack, it’s hard to separate your relationships out into their single pairs, beyond soon-to-be mated pairs and soulmates aside. It’s hard not to want to do everything together.

But getting away with the pack alpha for a few days is probably going to be good for all of you. A day or two apart and some time to decompress. A brief stretch so that you only miss each other more.

To have the pack alpha’s undivided attention is something that you’re both excited and nervous about.

He’s taking you to a resort and hot springs up north. Surrounded by a cherry blossom grove that’s earned its spot at the top of several travel blogs as the number one event to do in the spring. It's not a terribly long trip and mid-week because the rest of the rooms had been booked up for the weekends already. But Namjoon had still insisted that you get a room with an attached private spring. T

here’s a cherry blossom trail on the grounds and a nice dinner planned for tomorrow night. But nothing else planned for the third day beyond your drive home. Namjoon had heard of this cute little roadside bakery that he wanted to stop at on your way for breakfast.

You’ve been bouncing up and down with excitement since last night- your singular suitcase packed yesterday morning by Tae and Jungkook- who had demanded you pack a quite frankly concerning amount of lingerie.

But even you had to admit that this is an undeniably sexy vacation. You hadn’t planned anything beyond your walk and dinner, mostly because you’d both expected to do something else for the majority of your trip.

Mostly having raunchy passionate hotel room sex… not that Namjoon even said explicitly that that's what he wants to do with you on this vacation. But he hadn't exactly not hinted at that either with the private onsen suite.

But looking down at your soiled panties, slick sticky, and darkening the fabric, you feel the least sexy that you have in weeks.

“What the fuck” you mutter. Quiet. Yoongi knocks at the door again. Softer.

“Can I come in?”

“One sec.”

The sound of crumpling toilet paper and Jin cursing downstairs becomes louder. The windows are open up here and down there and you can hear him and the cracking of metal pans against each other. Hobi’s laugh. The sound of the dishwasher going downstairs. Noodle meows at the front door. You can hear all of it. Yoongi’s footsteps back and forth by the door. Quiet words.

Is your hearing overly sensitive? Or are they all just loud? 

“Give us a sec Jk, sorry but can you go downstairs for a moment?”

Jungkook’s worried voice, the sound of kisses pressed to his lips, “Sure hyung, going for a run anyway,” Then quieter, so soft that you can’t hear- "Is she alright?”

"Yeah, it’s not nerves if that’s what you’re worried about.”

Jungkook breathes in deeply, and lets out a knowing sound as he scents slick on the air. "Want me to keep Jin-hyung away?"

"Please."

This is decidedly not normal for you. Normal for Jungkook sure- he has the most regular dirty dreams out of the whole pack. A few times a week you wake up to the smell of slick, sweet and tempting on the air and more than one alpha tempted to do something about it. Rewarded with Jungkook’s sweet submission when they give in to their temptations.

You've gotten used to his sleepy and quiet ah ah ah's waking you up.

You like morning kisses when Jungkook's getting fucked, it's almost like he forgets how to talk and kiss when he's being dicked down. when you wake up in the morning to gentle repetitive rocking and the sound of soft kisses. Hobi or Tae or Namjoon or Jimin tucked up behind him.

Jungkook likes it best when you pretend like you don't know what they're doing. When you sidle up to his front for a cuddle. You like to hear their croons of "don't be rude to your nestmate Jungkook, give her a good morning kiss." You like tasting Jungkook's shakey sighs against your mouth. Tucking yourself close to him and falling back asleep to the gentle hum of, "You better not cum, you might get the pup all messy, dirty little omega."

You like to be around when they're intimate, it makes you feel like you're still apart of it without any of the fear of being too much or not wanting sex enough. You've been easing up on the fine lines between all of you, on the more free-flowing and free-use parts of your relationship. Starting to explore it safely the way they haven't really had the opportunity too since before you became a part of their pack.

You hadn't really understood free use until jungkook explained it to you.

One afternoon, All of the pups having 'pup time' as Namjoon and Jin had started to call it- but is really just playing Mario cart in the backroom on lazy rainy afternoons. You'd snorted at his explanation. rearranging the plushies in your nesting nook. a note of skeptisizim in your voice.

"I'm not going to just like- push you down and sit on your face? That seems kinda mean Koo."

"For the record the idea of that is really hot." Jimin had tipped his head back, smashing buttons. Tae had hummed agreeing with jimin and combed her long fingers through Jimin's hair while she waits for her turn. Hobi had snorted smashing buttons and clicking.

"It's not mean though- not like mean mean."

Tae's fingers brushing between his legs had distracted him, touching him to tease and feel how hard he is. His little cock a chubby little secret, but jk knows to stay still under Tae's inspection. Jk's little cursor had slipped right off the rainbow road and fallen into space and Tae's hands had slipped off of him too. making him squirm.

"I just like how it feels sometimes, like I'm yours to have and take." Tae continued like nothing was amiss, had pet through his hair as if she hadn't just felt him up. Jungkook's sweet sweet scent is the only tell.

Tae had winked at you over Jungkook's shoulder. "It's kinda like how Namjoon was during a rut right?"

Jungkook's voice was rough, "Right. It's like- I don't know how to explain it- Soothing? That I know you're getting everything you want from me." Jungkook had shaken himself. "You don't have to join in if you don't want too- Hobi doesn't"

You'd turned to Hobi for confirmation, sat closest to you. his back leaned up against the rattan of your nesting nook. Completely focused on the screen and not on your conversation. "I'm like totally lapping you jk."

"No fair, I can't concentrate when I'm talking about sex." The round ends, Hobi wins and Jungkook and Tae swap controllers.

Tae flops down on Jimin's lap, his arms wrapping around her waist and head hooking over her shoulder fluidly. "If I beat you you owe me a kiss."

"Don't make me want to lose. It's not going to work."

"Oh it totally works you just don't want to admit it."

"I'm ready to Loose." Hobi snorts. and is rewarded by a kiss to his cheek.

without a controller, jk looks at you more fully. "We probably won't really start to do it for a little while, at least not not until-" Jungkook falls silent, and the next moment. Yoongi sidles up to the double doors, peering inside smiling at the sight of all of you heaped close. going quiet. "You know you guys could just sit on the couch instead of the floor."

"Not as comfy"

"Do you have room for one more?"

"Hyung you are so on."

Maybe Yoongi's distance with you would be easier to handle if you didn't also know he's been just as distant with the rest of the pack. Sexual needs ebb and flow, desire ebbs and flows too. Not everyone is like Jungkook- constantly in need, constantly simmering heat. Which is one of the reasons why free use for him is less of a want and more of a need. As much as you like to joke that Jungkook is a bit of a nymphomanic, he really does need that kind of gratification to feel loved.

This- the leaking slick, so rarely happens to you and Jin.

This feels disorienting. The bathroom spins. You’d leaked so much slick in your sleep that you’d soaked through your underwear and your pajama pants. they sit in a heap on the floor. Your panties are ruined.

You don’t think it’s just excitement for your trip. You don’t even remember having a dirty dream. You don't feel turned on, dizzy and a little dehydrated.

You can’t put back on your clothes but you tell Yoongi he can come in anyway. Sitting on the top of the toilet, your shirt long enough to cover your bareness but even you have to admit that he’s seen you in far worse states.

He lets out a small alarmed noise but keeps the door cracked behind him. He stoops to the floor to pick up your ruined pajama bottoms, putting them in the laundry. He’s got another pair in his hands and a pair of clean underwear too. He’s alarmed judging by the wide set of his eyes, looking up to your thighs and then your face.

“It’s just the excitement about leaving.” You don't even believe it as it comes out of your mouth.

He stoops and gets on his knees. He puts your feet through the leg holes, fingers on your calves. Humming.

Things have been better between the two of you recently, this isn't strange. Things are going back to the way they where slowly. There’s been little kisses here and there, laughter too; like when you both went out to the beach to stargaze a few weeks ago. just the two of you, a rare lone outing.

The lights were stark and cold up above and Yoongi's smile anything but. His back against the sand and the deep warm sound of his laughter chasing the winter winds away. A Lingering brightness dancing on the edge of your fingers, starlight jumping from your skin to his, close and warm in the night.

"What did you wish for?"

"Nothing"

Then after a moment, you'd admitted it. "For you to be happy"

"I'm already happy sweetheart"

"Really?"

"Really."

"Guess I wasted my wish then."

"I think you can make another wish, that one doesn’t count."

"Okay." A beat, a breath, a kiss to your cheek.

"Did you do it yet?"

"Yoongi-"

He still takes care of you- although the intention behind each action brews a little more balanced than before. He takes care of you and you take care of him too. You hold his latter when he gets up on it to paint, and hand him tools when Hobi’s car needs a tune-up. You follow him around the house the same way he used to follow you around.

You've begun minding his health the same way the others mind yours- you'd made him take vitamin C when he started coughing in mid-March. And nursed him through the unglamorous episode and illness that followed.

You'd held his hand while Namjoon had listened to his lungs and pouted at him each time he tried to get up when he should have been resting. Made him soup and babied him for the week he'd spent coughing and then cuddled him through his fever. Kept him plied with ice water and cough drops and miraculously hadn't caught the same mystery illness.

You’ve been trying to find a middle ground, a new kind of honesty that you hadn’t had before. He takes care of you now just as much as you take care of him.

Now, Yoongi’s hand hovers on your ankle. On his knees in front of where you sit and you’re nearly at eye level with him. You watch his nostrils flare, and his lips descend into a frown as he looks between your thighs. If it were anyone else you'd feel self-conscious.

“What are you thinking?”

Yoongi hesitates before he speaks his suspicion into life. He knows the power his words have and the joy that they have the possibility of ripping away. It's not just your high hopes he's worried about but Namjoon's too.

“Do you think you could be going into heat?”

Your stomach flips, but you instantly shake your head.

When you think internally, You feel no warmth, no wanting in your gut or instincts. You rub your hands over your face. Yoongi hesitates before getting up and washing his hands. Looking at you in the mirror.

“No, I don’t feel-” Your hand hovers over your stomach, and downstairs some pans clatter, and Jin curses loudly again. The pack awaits. You can hear Namjoon’s voice downstairs too. “It could be nothing. It was probably just a dream.”

You cover your face with your hand, quieting the heat in your cheeks. Yoongi doesn’t say anything. Turning around to rest against the sink and look at you, drying his hands slowly. You give him space to say something but when he stays silent you have to ask.

“Do you want me to cancel the trip? I can tell Namjoon, he'd understand.” 

He doesn’t reply immediately. Instead, he comes close again, making an alarmed noise when he sees the goosebumps on your thighs and dropping back to his knees, putting your feet through the holes of the clean pj’s and pulling them up slowly. Tender. His fingers hover on your calves treading higher and higher to the sensitive skin on the inside of your knees.

You have a bruise there, from roughhousing with Jk yesterday morning. A battle over prime nesting material you had not won (you'd been happy to lose when the punishment was being manhandled and several hickeys on various parts of your body. Jungkook likes to nibble.)

Yoongi's thumb covers the bruise in its entirety. “How far is the drive again?”

“Three hours.” Yoongi’s teeth worry away at his lower lip and it takes him a second to debate it internally

“You could come home, if something went wrong, Namjoon would drive you home.” Someone is coming up the stairs, you can hear the creek of the old wood, and you won't have your privacy for much longer.

You lean forward, hitting your forehead with his. “Yeah. You’re right.” Yoongi pecks your nose and stands up, stashing the last of your soiled clothes in the laundry basket where the smell of slick won’t be noticed.

Tae knocks the same second that you pull up your pants. Just in time, you’ll have to undress anyway to shower- but you don’t need her wondering why you and Yoongi are cleaning up your slick and hiding it from the others.

Tae grins from the cracked door once she sees it's just you and Yoongi, nudging it open with her toe completely unaware of the trouble brewing. If she notices the scent of your slick on the air she doesn't say anything. Her hips sway as she leans up against the door. Hands behind her back, holding something grinning at you.

“Can I pick out your outfit?”

“Something tells me you already have; I need to shower first.”

Tae has been taking a lot more free reign when it comes to you and your outfits. It's the one thing you had been interested in when Jungkook had first started to ask about free use. The one thing you'd been curious about.

You'd raised your eyebrow at it the first time you'd noticed Jin and tae set out Jungkook's workout set before work. Shivered and watched as they palmed and tugged and dressed him before letting him go with a kiss and a small tap to his bottom. Jungkook had that wide hazy look in his eyes, a slack grin on his mouth, subspace or omegaspace or some tangle of the two.

You'd been stuttering and unsure, "can we, can you- would you choose my clothes for me too?"

Both of them, Jin and Tae, had stood up straighter, both of them near purring- like they'd been waiting for you to ask. (You haven't forgotten and neither have they- how you call Jinnie daddy and Tae mommy. Although you've begun to use the latter name more casually with Tae).

You are still warming up to it, but Tae's been setting out your clothing most mornings and Jin's been selecting your pj’s each night. Your and Jin's routine usually comes with a hole check and settling if you ask for it nicely (a cock and knot if you ask even more nice, if jin checks your hole and finds you warm and wet and wanting)

While the clothing is not entirely a dominance thing, that needy gleam in their eyes is unmistakable. With Jin, you can almost tell yourself that it's just his grooming instincts, but with tae- the clothing is a little different.

You don’t mind that she likes it, deciding what you wear and how you wear it. You don’t mind that she finds some satisfaction from it- some instinct fulfilled, some pleasure gained. You don’t mind maybe because it’s her and she has good taste, because she so often chooses what you want to wear anyway.

And because, as she so often reminds you, you can tell her no at any time without fear of anger or punishment.

Panties or no panties? A matching set or a soft playsuit for lounging around and nesting? A lacy little bralette or nothing at all?

Actually- I'm going to go for a walk with Hobi today, to the beach. Can I wear one of alpha's sweatshirts?

Of course you can sweetheart.

Maybe because it’s one less decision you have to make, one more way you can let her take care of you. Tae packed your suitcase for this trip because of this newfound sense of give and control.

It's not all endless giving. Tae often checks with you before she does anything too risky.

Tae hadn't been interested in any dominance and submission before you, the one vanilla packmate before her transition. But now that it's here and it's with you, Tae wants and wants and wants. Some of the stuff like with safewords and aftercare she's well acquainted with, but other things are newer for both of you. You know she talks with Namjoon and Jin about it, you know that they are both guiding her with this and teaching her how to be a good dom.

Many evenings Jin looks and inspects what Tae has put you in, their attention makes you shiver and stand straighter, "what a good choice Tae-baby, my good little alpha making our omega so pretty."

One morning blends into another, one morning she doesn't decide at all and then the next she stands there and asks. "Can I push you today?"

You'd squirmed and sat in the dressing room, waiting, negotiating. Jin had already given you a hole check that morning and promised there would be another one later with a heavy look. like he knew before what tae is going to try and do. You'd needed a hole check too- you'd woken up whiney and in omegaspace, sweet and in need of someone to steady your instincts.

"Yes."

You'd stuttered when she'd showed you the dress, the short short hem, fumbled even more when she told you that you wouldn't be wearing anything underneath, that you wouldn't be going anywhere either until someone found out.

(Jimin had been the lucky packmate. Pulling you down onto his lap during breakfast, his bare thighs thick in his shorts. Your cries of "Minnie wait-" came too late when. His raised eyebrows had drawn more than one packmate's attention as he'd held your waist. Stopped you from squirming. his bare skin against your bare skin and wetness, because Tae knew, tae knew and she-

"What is it?" Namjoon had asked. Tae was doing nothing more than grinning and sipping her coffee over his shoulder, watching the situation that she created unfold with a hungry gleam in her eyes. Jimin's fingers had lingered on the hem of your dress. Glancing from you to Tae. "Why don't you come and see hyung?")

Now she holds out a folded dress to you, “guilty.”

You sigh, but Yoongi holds out his hand, helping you stand. You reach for the brush on the counter but Tae beats you to it, standing behind you. So close you can feel her heat down your spine.

You shiver. 

“Guys I can-“

“Nonsense, Mommy will do it.” Tae doesn’t let you lift a finger. And you guess you shouldn’t really be all that fussy or shy, you stay still while Tae detangles your hair and Yoongi starts the shower and sets out your towel and a pair of warm long socks that sit in a heap on top of your folded dress. They won’t have a chance to baby you for the rest of the week (or at least not until Friday when you get home) so you let them take what they can get.

It's not all sexual, it's loving too.

Tae detangles your hair gently, so soft that you're tempted to close your eyes again, especially with the warm steam filling the room. Yoongi stays close, watching you as he stands by the sink and talks to Tae about their plans for tomorrow. Distant plans that you are aware of.

Yoongi's quickly distracted from actually helping you shower by a shout from Hobi downstairs but he doesn't leave without kissing your forehead first. You undress and Tae washes her face and does her skincare routine while you shower. Chatting to you again about your itinerary for today with how she talks you’d almost think that she was coming with but she isn’t.

Today is just for you and Namjoon, the whole weekend really. She’s as excited for you to have some time with Namjoon as you are, maybe even a little bit more excited than you are.

She’s probably just thinking of the outfits.

You're still kind of tired, still kind of half asleep. The steam in the bathroom makes you feel hazy, Tae has to remind you every few seconds not just to lean against the tile under the spray and actually wash your hair. It's just so warm, so nice, here under the warm water surrounded by the scent of her and Yoongi. You paw at the nob to the shower turning it warmer. Sighing when it goes hot.

You must have nodded off for a moment because the rush of cold air from the big glass door opening shocks you into almost slipping. Your hands hit the wet tile to steady yourself. She leans around you, avoiding the water and turning it colder.

“your skin is getting red!” She's alarmed, but not angry as you blink down at your arms and your chest- turned splotchy.

“Yeah, shit, I didn’t realize,” Tae watches you warily, sucking on her lower lip before she prattles on.

"'You're like really sleepy today,"

"Yeah," you say, voice hushed,

"Excited though?" she double-checks.

You grin, dopey "Yeah."

After that everything feels a little hazy, maybe it’s the temperature of the house or just Tae being close. She moves you from the bathroom to the dressing room giggling as you almost bump into the walls, keeping your towel tucked even as you struggle to keep your eyes open.

"I really think I need some coffee," you say as you rub your eyes and Tae dots cream over your flushed cheeks. Her answering hum does not promise caffeine.

"In a second, I'm almost done. You can close your eyes while I do your makeup if you need to." You try to fight your drowsiness- you really do. But soon the scent at the apex of her shoulder and neck temps you too much and you squirm closer and closer in search of her warmth.

Tae put you in a robe when you got out of the shower but you still feel so cold. So needy. You squirm until you're sat across her thighs, each knee on either side of her hips in your familiar position. Whining when she finishes your skincare and has to scoot back to do your hair taking your only source of warmth with her.

Her giggle makes you want to bear your throat to her. "I can't curl your hair and cuddle you at the same time pup." You whine, but she's immune, "Be good." a small warning in her tone.

You straighten up, blinking hazily up at her and letting her detangle herself from you to stand, until she tells you that you can close your eyes again.

Your head lolls while she blow-dries your hair, tugged from side to side by the round brush. Tae's giggles and voice are a lullaby. The warm air from the drier sends more and more of her scent fluttering over your nose.

She reaches to pin your hair back and you nuzzle into her wrist. “Pup” she stresses. But you get away with it.

Tae keeps the makeup light; a bit of strawberry-colored blush deepening the flush on your cheeks, faint concealer.

She starts to dress you, pulling the underwear up your thighs and hips with a soft barely there kiss pressed over them that makes you squirm. She tugs the socks up to your mid thigh and guides your arms through the sleeves and over your head. The thick fabric feels a little like a blanket over your knees. Tae pulls it down until it covers all of you.

You don’t bother to look in the mirror quite yet, still nodding off every now and then as she sprays hairspray to set your soft curls in place. "There we go- you're perfect." 

Her fingers on your cheeks prompt you to open your eyes and when you do, you find you're sitting in front of the vanity. Tae's behind you, her dark silk robe at odds with the light flutter of your dress. One of her arms wraps around your shoulders, and the other grips your face, turning your face from side to side to show off her handy work. Her fingers pinch just enough that your lips stick out. Red but hazy around the edges like your lipstick got kissed off or maybe kissed on- it's hard to tell.

You look like a doll; You look pretty (you always look pretty once Tae has had her way with you).

"What do you say pup?" Tae and Jin have both ganged up on you a bit recently about your manners. You don’t mind her sternness if anything it just makes you feel smaller and more pupish- both things you like feeling around Tae.

"Thank you, Mommy." You pout, and Tae rewards you with a soft kiss that makes you squirm. her fingers still digging into your cheeks.

"You're welcome, honey. Let’s go show our boys what they're missing."

~-~

Tall dark boots wait for you by the door, another gift from Tae. Side by side with your suitcase. Prepared and waiting.

You giggle and tug her on down the stairs, going a little fast, ignoring her cries of "pup, slow down" The excitement builds until you hit the bottom step and almost slip, the socks from Yoongi fluffy and slick, Tae makes to grab you and the two of you tumble straight into Namjoon.

The pack alpha lets out a quiet oof.

It's a good thing he's so tall and strong, both of his arms shoot out to steady you.

You blink up at him, and his big hands hover on your shoulders. Dancing along the back plunge of the dress. It’s a baby doll style, checkered pink and blue. the front is boatnecked, but the back plunges open, tied closed with a bow. Namjoon touches your skin through the low backline. his palm rough and warm.

Namjoon steps back for a second. Making a pleased noise. Looking you up and down, “Look at you pup.”

Tae just leans back against the railing and preens. You look to the left and into the mirror.

You look so small compared to Namjoon and Tae. Doe-eyed and like something out of a cottage core fantasy in your outfit. It’s a little doll-like in cut and style, the bow on the back almost coquettish. Namjoon’s wide hands cover the open panel of your back. Running up and down again. You can feel his grumbly purr of satisfaction against your chest.

Tae tugs down the bottom hem of your dress. You sway.

Namjoon has put a bit more effort into his outfit today too. His jeans are new and his sneakers are the first pair of non medical grade non-slip ones he’s owned in years. He’s wearing a plane tee under a button-down, just his usual uniform since he’s started spending more and more time at home and only working 3 days a week. You bury your face in the front of Namjoon’s shirt, nosing aimlessly.

He looks every picture of a pack alpha, big and imposing. Unafraid of taking up space. The pack alpha grins down at you, all but bouncing up and down on his heels in excitement. The sight of him makes you leak slick again. Just a little. you wonder if both of your alpha’s can smell it.

Really- what is going on?  

“Tae, you-”

Namjoon’s tongue-tied but Tae just smiles, small, at the corner of her mouth in that special secret way that girls smile. She curls a lock of your hair around one of her fingers. “You’re welcome Joonie”

Namjoon squishes you a little harder to his chest in cute aggression and you feel your chest squish too. Huh, Tae didn’t put you in a bra. you're not upset just confused- obviously, you're gonna want to sleep on the drive and wearing one all that way would be uncomfortable but Your hand comes up, feeling.

“You fussed,” she says, “didn’t want it.” Reading your mind is just one of Tae’s many talents, but you blink. You like the way that the dress billows out, not hugging your body. The darts on the side still give the effect of hugging your figure without it being tight.

You peak up at him and Namjoon's blushing, so you hide your face in his chest instead of confronting it. His hand crests your shoulder pulling you in closer, giving you permission to rub your face in harder. You scent him sleepy until your breath is hitching.

Noodle yowls and slips through your ankles, purring and trailing after Hobi who just huffs happily, watching the three of you from the living room before he continues plucking blankets off the couch, a half-full basket of laundry in his clutches that he ferries down to the basement.

Namjoon's dimples are little crescent moons to the star of his smile when you pull back. immeidatly ducking back down when the sight of him overwhelmes you. “Having fun down there?” He teases.

“Yes,” you reply stubbornly and he laughs, his stomach pushing out against your sternum. You bury your face back in his shirt again, harder this time. Too shy to meet the pure adoration in his eyes. 

“I’ve just got to put the suitcase and my bag in the car and then we’ll be ready to go okay? Wanna get us some coffee?” You nod, and he pecks your forehead before detangling himself from you.

"Tae!" Hobi calls from the basement. "Can you get me your dirty laundry please?" Hobi, "Jk wants to do it when he gets home but I don't want him carrying anything down the stairs." Tae sighs and heads back upstairs.

A loud clang and more cursing interrupts you where you’re standing in the entryway. But it’s just Jinnie. You follow the source of the noise to the kitchen, hovering unsure by the kitchen island.

If you had a good night's sleep last night- it looks like Jin had the opposite.

Jinnie doesn’t look like his usually perfectly curated omega this morning; his striped robe has stains on the hems. His cheeks are blotchy and his eyes are puffy. His coffee cup leaves rings where it sits on the countertop like his hands had been shaky when he set it down.

He's got about a dozen bags of flour- semolina and almond, caster sugar and regular sugar taking up every available space in the kitchen. Along with just about everything from the confines of your fridge too. He looks like he's half way between breakfast and a deep clean. Even though it's already almost 10.

You watch as he sighs and rubs a hand across his face furrowing his eyebrows when he thinks that no one’s watching. You sidle up behind him and he jumps a few feet in the air, “pup- I didn’t-” You nudge his shoulder with your nose (a special little omegan hello). Jin exhales, and his shoulders relax, no longer up to his ears.

"What are you looking for?" It's the wrong thing to ask. Jin puffs back up almost instantly. The mirror image of Noodle when there's a fly he just can't seem to catch.

Jin pulls the coffee mugs down from where they sit, one after another, putting them down a little hard and quick. "The syrup! I don't know who put it away last but when I find out who did I'll-"

You smile, and wordlessly go over to the sink, opening the door and bending down to reach around in the cleaning supplies, pulling it from all the way in the back with a quiet ah-ha!

"Oh, you-" Jin blinks down at you a little stunned. Then bristles, voice going darker. Eyes narrowing with suspicion. "Did you put it there?"

You are not intimidated at all by Jin's pack omega shenanigans or his grumpiness this early in the morning. Smiling up at him absolutely unbothered by his sour mood. "No, you did!"

Jin pouts, gesturing at you to explain, you shrug and set it on the counter. "It looks the same as a bottle of cleaning supplies, and the last time you gave the kitchen a deep clean you weren't wearing your glasses."

"Oh." Jin's lips are a near-perfect circle, plush where they pout, annoyed with himself. "Thank you." You get up on your tippy toes to peck him on the cheek and dart past him to put your sourdough starter and semolina flour away very very carefully.

Jin starts to undo the rest of his whirlwind, leaving out some of the ingredients so that he can get started on the pancakes. The house is quiet for now, the two of you work side by side in companionable silence.

When you're done, Jin wipes his hands on the cloth. “Do you have everything you need before you go?”

You nod, and Jin's shoulders deflate, leaning up against the counter, he barely manages to hide his crushed expression before he turns away and starts to get to work on the pancakes. He pulls a metal bowl down from the shelf without a word whereas he'd usually ask you for help with it- and starts adding eggs to it indiscriminately, cracking them with one hand.

“Jinnie?” You ask quietly. The eggs go tap-crack-plop. The pack omega hums, but doesn’t look up from the bowl. Pausing after the first few eggs to break the yolks with a large whisk. The scrape of metal against metal jarring.

“Do you, uhm-” his eyebrows are furrowed concentrating on what he’s doing, “Do you want us to stay home today?”

Jin looks up so quickly that he almost cracks the next egg onto the countertop instead of in the bowl. “What! No- what gave you that idea?” Jin sets the bowl down and reaches for you, but you look at his fingers, sticky, and the rest of him- covered with flour. The dress Tae put you in is new, and the flour will surely show.

Jin washes his hands, and dries them, while you get two travel mugs down from the shelf. One green travel mug for Namjoon and a pink one for you. He dries his hands in the cloth while he watches you.

Tae's really really mean, making you look so pretty before you'll leave for so long. Three days. That will be your longest absence from the house, the den, and Jin's nest since the beginning.

Jin feels a little like he's choking. Like his skin is crawling. You're not even going to eat breakfast with them. Even back when Jin still had his day job with the Fbi. Breakfast is your ritual.

Jin lets out a shakey breath, “Of course I want you to go and have fun pup. You and Namjoon have been looking forward to this for weeks.” You pour out coffee and then enough milk into both your and Namjoon’s travel mugs.

“I know, but that wouldn’t mean anything if you wanted us to stay- you seem-” You glance up at him, and miss the next dollop of milk in Namjoon’s cup, getting it all over the counter. “Shit.”

Jin just hums and uses his cloth to whip it up. Almost pinning you to the counter in the process, leaning around you so that he’s sandwiching you in on all sides. His chin hits the top of your head. And when he’s done you flip around looking up at him.

“You’re-” you choose your words carefully, “you’re off today?” he can hear the question in your voice. Tucking an errant hair behind your ear. But he’s not disagreeing with you. You continue to pry. “You feel like Mini does when he’s having a bad sensory day?”

“Yeah,” Jin breathes in and out, and it looks like it takes him effort. You wait for him to say that he needs you, that he really doesn’t want you to go, that the idea of having you outside of the nest is not something that he can handle today.

“Make sure Namjoon texts me when you get there okay? And I want you to call me before you go to bed tonight and show me your nest. If you want to pack some blankets or stuff that smells like us you should- don’t worry about missing the traffic- and- and-”

Hobi thuds up the stairs from the basement, an empty laundry basket in his hands.

“Hey no stealing her-” he wags his fingers, Jin pouts at your alpha, and you watch his eyes follow Hobi. You watch Hobi’s eyes flicker down your body and then back up to your face, and Jin’s arms tighten around your waist.

“Hobi she’s my pup-” but Hobi just wags his finger, you’ve never seen him even try to put Jin in his place before let alone scold him.

Is everyone feeling a little bit off kilter, or is it just you?

“Technically he’s not stealing me, technically I’m stealing his alpha.” Hobi senses the guilty lilt in your voice and shakes his head. Jin pecks your forehead, lingering for just a little bit longer than he might ordinarily before he steps back to his bowl, and adds a dark splash of vanilla to the creamy contents.

“No he's going to get substantially babied by his other three alphas-Jiminie and I are taking everyone out for dinner tomorrow tonight so that no one has to cook or anything- we’re gonna go to one of Tae’s fancy poetry readings and stuff.”

“Oh,” you say. You sort of like Tae’s poetry, sort of love watching her play around with words like she’s a little kid in a sandbox. Two seconds ago, you’d been worried that Jin would feel left out and now-

“Can you check the oil in your car before they leave?” Jin asks. Hobi’s eyes flicker to his and then yours.

“Yeah, when are you guys heading out?”

You pout, feeling guilty, “sort of right now.”

“Oh shit. I thought-” Hobi shakes his head, and for a second you think you see something like disappointment cross his features. “I’ll do it now.”

Hobi has graciously allowed you to borrow his car for the weekend because of its spacious and easy-to-travel interior. Namjoon loads your suitcases into the Lambo while Hobi grabs a wad of paper towels and makes him promise not to ding it- he only just got all the scratches from Jimin buffed out and freshly painted.

Yoongi lingers with you by the front door, watching Hobi pop the hood. Your hands tangled for a second and he drags you in. His cheek resting on top of your head for a second, while you rub your chin across his collarbones, scenting him before you go.

But Namjoon is already waiting by the car, watching you with a soft smile.

Hobi tops the oil off and slowly walks to the front porch, almost like he's prolonging your departure by going as slow as possible. You give a small shiver as the breeze rustles the birdfeeders and the windchimes casting your scent in his direction. His nostrils flare and his eyes dart from you to Yoongi who ever so subtly shakes his head.

Hobi walks up the stairs to you, sweatshirt pulled up to his elbows, curling his hand around your elbow in passing. “One sec- wait.” Namjoon rests his chin on the hood of the car, both your cups steaming into the open air. Yoongi taps his fingers against the balcony railing, and for a second you think he’s going to ask you to stay, that the worry of you going into heat is too much.

But then he doesn’t. You stand close enough to him that his elbow brushes yours.

“Take pictures,” he tells Namjoon. The pack alpha’s cheeks go pink and you make a face. “Yah not those kinds of pictures!” But your mate is smiling and that’s all you need for the last of your nerves to dissipate.

“Love you,” you say without looking at him.

“Love you too, please call.” He looks down at you.

“I will.”

Hobi comes back, he’s got a tangle of fabric in his hands, a scarf of Tae’s, and a hat of his. “It’s not that cold.” You try and wine. “It’s gonna be warm at the hot springs.” Hobi leans down to your level, purposefully pulling his hat over your eyes roughly probably messing up your hair. You whine "My hair- Hobi-" He just grins down at you.

“Do you want to take my jacket? How about some mittens?”

“Guys” You roll your eyes at your packmates, but Yoongi and Hobi wear twin grins. “It is like maybe 50 degrees. Jungkookie went running when it was 30 yesterday.”

“Jungkookie runs all the time.”

“He did it in shorts and without a shirt.” Hobi just messes up your hair again, rubbing around the hat and probably causing a fair amount of frizz. So much for tae's hard work.

“I’ve got the heat warmer on already!” Namjoon calls, and you give your last goodbye kisses before hurring after him down the steps.

“Bye!”

“have fun!”

“Be safe!” 

You ignore the tight feeling in your chest as you pull away from the house, ignoring the same way that Yoongi- still standing on the porch, starts breathing heavily. His eyes going a bit wild, panicking just a tiny tiny bit. Hobi wraps his arms around him in a hug and holds him through the anxiety. You are already down the street when Hobi lets go.

"Breath hyung, it's just a few days, she'll be back by Friday."

"Yeah, Friday." Yoongi replies sullenly.

“She’s gonna be fine hyung.”

“Yeah,” Yoongi says, staring after you.

~-~

You fall asleep sometimes after the little roadside bakery. it was just as cute as Namjoon promised, with a pink interior and a whole bunch of different scones and muffins and cupcakes. A small purple box of them in the back of the car sloshes with the movement of the backcountry roads. a full belly of half-finished treats, blueberry scones, and coffee cake muffins, lulls you to sleep in the warm interior of the car.

Namjoon’s soft presence in the driver’s seat and his hand on your thigh does wonders to settle you from the fraught feeling that you’d had while leaving the house. Really, you don't know what you were so worried about.

Namjoon leans over when traffic’s paused, to wipe a tiny crumb from your cheek. Smiling softly. Is this how Hobi feels when he goes on drives with you? Namjoon can see why he likes it- watching your head lull, the soft sound of your breathing, and your sweet scent building and building in the contained interior of the car until Namjoon’s lungs ache with it.

You sleep almost the whole way, only waking when the sun is low in the sky and the scenery is starting to go all moss green and pretty. The country roads are not as maintained here- and the wheels of the lambo start to thud and bump over potholes and cracks. One particularly heavy thud makes you rouse.

“We’re almost there,” he says, and you sip from the water bottle and yawn, Your eyelashes feel so heavy. Gone is suburban sprawl and the lights from distant cities. You bob and weave through switchbacks and steep hills. The thick clouds cover the scenery like a blanket. Maybe it’s mist or steam?

It feels like you too are covered with something heavy and hazy.

The onsen is a tangle of buildings deep in a grove of tall pine trees. The forest is dark green and dotted with bright splotches of pink, the whole drive up to the front is lined with them. it's so pretty you press your cheek to the window. You’re not feeling any more awake by the time you roll up to the front of the onsen and Namjoon parks and tells you that you can stay inside while he checks in.

It’s a traditional style building with thick black tiled roofs and smooth polished wooden beams. Deep dark streams run from building to building, and a covered path crisscrosses back and forth. people walk past in white fluffy robes, clutching grey towels to their chests.

A child somewhere giggles, and your eyes flutter closed, leaning your cheek on the door, nose poked out the open window. You can feel the heat from here.

Namjoon gets your keys and your directions to your room from the kind elderly omega at the front. Your suite is at the edge of the property, secluded and far away from the communal baths that require bathing suits. But Namjoon booked this suite for a reason- because it’s private, you don’t need to separate by secondary gender at all.

You don't even need to wear your bathing suits if you don't want too.

It is far away from the main building though, by the time he pulls the car up to the front you have nodded off again, the warm air tickling your face. Hobi’s hat is discarded in your lap.

It’s really warm here, that must be why you fall asleep so easily, right?

You can feel the bob of Namjoon’s steps, his arms underneath you. The feeling of warm air billowing tickles your face. Your arms weakly wind around his neck, when Namjoon sets you on your feet and you teeter, still half asleep.

“Sorry pup, I just need to shut the door.” Namjoon steers you gently towards the bed and you blink, looking up at him, a little out of it. Yawning so wide and long that your jaw pops.

“Sorry, I don’t know why I can’t seem to wake up.”  

“You’re a little scent drunk- it’s okay.” Namjoon presses a glass of water into your hands and you look around your hotel room.

The smooth dark floor compliments the white walls and earth tones of the furniture. The onsen staff were nice enough to open the doors to your courtyard and warm sweet air rolls in along with the steam. From your bed (king-sized, but smaller than you’re used to since your bed at home is two king-sized smushed together) you can see out into the courtyard.

The wide room looks out over onto a courtyard, a deep inset pool on the floor with water that flows freely from one suite to the others- quartered off between units by high wooden fences. Great swathes of grasses and half a dozen tall weeping cherry trees rim the edge of your courtyard.

Grown in and gnarled. They have to have been here longer than you've been alive. Thick roots push up the soil and the grasses and the tiled edge of the pool on the far side. Long tendrils of pink flowers flutter, you have to stand up and go to the opening to get closer.

“Pretty, isn’t it?” Namjoon offers, close behind you. He wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you to rest against his chest while you look out at the deep pool. The dark green tile camouflages the bottom and makes the pink petals stand out. Its calm surface dances with flower petals and steam. It’s probably chest-high on Namjoon at its deepest.

“It’s so peaceful,” you say, your voice hardly a whisper. Nothing beyond the gentle falling petals and your alpha’s breathing behind you disturbs it. Namjoon's thumbs rub up and down your elbows. His nose trails down the side of your throat.

“Apparently the hot water helps the cherry trees bloom a lot more vibrantly.”

“Do you think Hobi would plant us one of these if we asked him?”

“I think he’d do it the second you said you wanted it. Even if it was 3 in the morning, he’d start digging.”

You giggle and relax back into his touch.

They’re beautiful. You chose the perfect time of year because there’s still countless blossoms on the trees and yet big bunches have gathered on the outdoor patio, some even flutter inside falling like snow.

You squeal, and suddenly with more energy, Namjoon laughs as you pick up a big handful of petals and blow them in his face. "Oh no you don't- this is war!" He stoops, picks up his own handful and you go like that, throwing blossoms at each other like they're snowballs until you're both covered in pink. Giggling and clinging to each other. Namjoon picks one from your eyelashes.

"Wait! Yoongi wanted pictures." You send one to the group chat, your cheek smushed to Namjoon's cheek, both of you covered with tiny pink petals. Namjoon turns and kisses one off your cheek, and the resulting photo ends up becoming his home screen eventually.

“Want to put on our bathing suits?” You nod jauntily, starting to move in the direction of your suitcases to get them but Namjoon shakes his head. “Stay put, I’ll get them.” He pauses for a second, trailing his nose up the side of your throat again, eyebrows furrowed. your whole body goes shivery. He crosses the room to the suitcase while you hide your blush, turning away to watch the cherry blossoms flutter in another strong breeze.

But then there’s a crash and you look back.

Namjoon’s standing pink-cheeked. Looking down at the tangle of clothes and your suitcase upended on the floor. Looking from you to the pile and the rivers of pink and purple and pastel lace upended out onto the floor. The lingerie that Tae packed for you that Namjoon was definitely not supposed to see until they actually got on your body.

 You stoop to get them before he can, shoving them back inside. Cheeks aflame. “Tae- she- I don’t know why she-”

“It’s okay- ugh- uhm” Namjoon is so red you think he might be transmuting into a tomato. Namjoon swallows hard, picks up his swim trunks from the floor and you wheel your luggage into the bathroom, a strappy thong gets tangled in one of the wheels and you drag it with a loud squeak until it's inside.

You shut the door but the damage is already done. You let out a quiet embarrassed whine.

You find yourself pacing back and forth in front of the mirror for a moment. Struggling with your fancy dress that’s for tomorrow night’s dinner, hanging it up with a huff so that it doesn't get any more wrinkles. shaking off your embarrassment. It's just Namjoon, he's seen you in your lingerie before.

You knew what you were agreeing to going on this vacation with Namjoon. A solo vacation just for the two of you sends a very very pointed message. This is a sexy vacation- a private suite and a private onsen only means one thing and now at the precipice of it you feel- you feel-

Namjoon nocks, but you tell him you need a minute trying not to sound scared.

You don’t even know why you feel scared; you’ve had sex with Namjoon before, and taking him is no longer quite as daunting of a task as it once was. But you feel unsettled. Out of your depth here. Intimacy and romance are so much harder without your pack around you to reassure you to egg you on.

You need to call Tae.

She picks up on the second ring, “Pup!” she sounds happy and bubbly even through the phone. You even hear a bit of relief in her voice. “I’m doing my nails upstairs because Jin and Jungkook are being loud; did you get to the hotel yet? How are the flowers?”

“Tae” you hiss, keeping your voice down. “Did you think I’d spend the whole weekend lounging in lingerie!? You didn’t even pack me a bathing suit!” You whine. Still pacing.

“Well, I was actually hoping you’d spend the whole weekend getting your lingerie torn off of you but-”

“Mommy” you whine, and she quiets.

“It’s at the bottom, the dark red one with the flowers.” You find it, if only because it’s a bright oxblood in the mess of pastels. It’s dotted with pale yellow flowers and crossing straps that are supposed to tie around the slimmest part of your waist several times. It’s very Tae. Strappy and sexy and so tiny. The triangles are so small, it might as well be lingerie too.

“Tae- this isn’t going to fit me.”

“Yes, it does” she quips. “I measured.” You flush. You’re sure she did actually measure, probably during one of your morning preening and grooming sessions that you have a habit of spending mostly in omegaspace, an eager puppet to her hands. The idea that you’d been so far down, so trusting that you didn’t even notice warms your blood.

But Tae chose this for you, your alpha chose this for you and your other alpha. Tae does often know best. She knows what Namjoon likes.

Your heart rate slows a little. but you don't let Tae off that easy. “Tae- this is just a mess of strings,” she giggles, and you know just from the sound of it that she did this on purpose.

“Come on, live a little.”

“I know but- but-” you sit on the toilet, and she hums.

You wait, sensing that she’s yet to speak. You can hear Namjoon in the other room, starting to pace. You swear you hear him talking too. The hushed grumble as he talks to someone over the phone to someone.

“I’m sorry, I should have packed you something more modest. I just thought you’d want to- I don’t know, tell me off if I'm wrong but- Don't you want to explore a little? You can have both. Being wanted and being treated delicately- it's not one or the other.”

Your breath hitches, and you wonder how she managed to hit it right on the head. You do feel delicate- you've felt delicate the whole day.

“You can wear skimpy clothes and Namjoon will just be happy he gets to look at you. He still won’t do anything unless you say you want him to. He’s well-behaved like that.”

“Mommy-”

“You love feeling cute, you love feeling wanted. Let him want you pup, it doesn’t have to mean anything.”

“You’re just saying that because you like to give Namjoon a hard time.”

“It’s a love language” that does get a giggle out of you. She sounds satisfied, her voice a purr, but she still apologizes. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you upset.”

“You didn’t, I just panicked in the moment.” You pause, and Tae doesn’t fill the space with chatter. “I feel so innocent around him, so- not like this. Not that it’s dirty to dress this way, just…” You trail off.

"The pack alpha loves you, he’s gonna think you’re stunning no matter what. You could walk out in nothing and he’d still probably ask before he looked at you.”

“I kinda want him to look at me,” You admit, confess. “I kinda like making him have to restrain himself.” You have no reason to be nervous.

Tae’s voice is a purr, “There’s my girl. What do you say?”

“Thank you mommy.”

“Are you gonna be a good girl for the pack alpha?” Her voice is a dark purr.

“No mommy.”

"Perfect. Love you. Have fun. Make sure Namjoon gets a nosebleed.”

“Love you too, tae?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

~-~

Namjoon does what Tae expected when you open the door.

He’s standing by the edge of the bed looking at his phone, tapping away while you stand, waiting. “I ordered us food, I know it’s a little early but we’re so far away from town, I just thought-”

He looks up at you and promptly drops his phone. He tries to catch it but fails. Then he tries to lean down to grab it and smacks his head on the bed.

It’s soft, so he sort of bounces back up.   

He grips his forehead and you cover your giggle with your hand. “Sorry I shouldn’t be laughing, are you okay?”

“Totally fine. Yup. Totally- really good-“ and his mouth goes dry at the away of your hips walking over to him. Namjoon’s red all the way from his collar to his ears.

After a moment of just staring at you he tears off his shirt, over his head, quick. His hair is all fluffy and spikey when he comes out the other side.  “It’s like really hot in here, right? Not just me, right?"

You blink up at him. Your grin already teasing.

"That was not a pick-up line.” He tries to justify. Panicked.

“Sort of sounded like a pick-up line.”

Namjoon stares at your face, “I’m trying really hard not to look down. It’s taking like- all of my brain power.”

You put your arms behind your back, bouncing back and forth on the balls of your feet. “You can look if you want.”

Namjoon does look, eyes drifting from string to string, words tangling behind his bitten lips. You can hear the growl build in his throat. He crosses his arms, biting his fist in an effort not to say something stupid as you twirl and show him your bikini. When you look back, his knuckles bear the red imprints of his teeth. 

“Sorry, let me start again- you look great. Awesome- 5 stars, want to swim with you so hard- I mean bad!  I thought maybe I should order food, so I did that- order food. I know I should have asked you what you want to eat but I just got like- a lot of food instead. And I also door-dash candy because you like sweet stuff for dessert. but the main house sells buns until 8 pm- not that they could be better than your buns- I mean the red bean buns you make a home! Not your butt- I mean that’s really nice too. I mean- shit- I mean-”

“Namjoon?”

“Yeah?”

“Stop talking.”

“I’ll stop talking yeah. Probably a good idea,” Namjoon leaves his phone on the floor, watching you, blinking like he doesn’t quite believe his eyes. Traceing the strings that cross your body. “Fucking hell-”

In a moment of bravery, you reach back and pull at the strings, and a sound dies in Namjoon’s throat as it falls off of you string by string. You keep eye contact with Namjoon the whole time. You watch him swallow hard, and it seems like he doesn’t know what to do with his hands.

You reach to the side of your hip and pull at those strings too and the rest falls to the floor.

Namjoon forcefully keeps his eyes on your face, But his eyes are dark and gentle, honey and vibrant with the force of his wanting, lips parting in an unsteady breath.

“Fuck”

You turn and walk into the pool, not looking back at him as you go. your heart thundering in your ears as you struggle not to trip or slip on the smooth decking and then grab onto the railing like a lifeline and lower yourself into the dark water.

The onsen water is clear and clean- warm almost to the point of being too hot and stinging your skin. But some part of you, the same part of you that had you turning belly down in the nest earlier, loves the warmth and wants to roll around in it. Easing in with a sigh, looking back at him, your hair tickling your shoulders wet.

You don’t speak, and neither does he as he walks to the edge of the decking, following you as if he’s in a trance.

Namjoon stands there for a moment. And then he stoops, pulls down his swimming trunks too, somehow manages not to trip over them while he steps out of them in the process. And you can’t stop your flickering eyes south.

You lean your cheek up against the smooth wood decking and look up at him.

He's almost all the way hard, your pulse quickens at the way his cock lies against his thigh, the way he twitches just a little under your gaze. you push back and float into the middle of the pool.

He follows you in and when he moves through the dark water in your direction you don’t move back. you let him scoop you up and pull your slick body against this. Both of you bare, both of you hidden beneath the dark water. He feels so good, hard and strong and familiar against your front. The last of your fear disappears the second Namjoon touches you and you remember.

For a second you think his hands are going to slide south to grab at your ass, your chest, or anywhere else- but he doesn't. Namjoon doesn't make to kiss you, he just holds you to his chest, hugging you bare. The same way he hugs you in the morning, at night when he gets home. You're nude, but instead of making to have you. For a second Namjoon just holds you.

Safe.

“You know, even though we’re nude we don’t need to- if you don’t-” he pauses and you watch Namjoon war with what this calls for too. A very sexy vacation usually means lots of filthy nasty sex but-

Namjoon’s pectorals in the water cause little ripples. You wind your arms around his neck pressing yourself closer. The water might be warm, but it's him you reach for and cling to in the water.

“Can we just stay here for a while? Just close like this?”

“Yeah,” His voice sounds so husky, so rough, his nose traces yours, but he doesn't lean in to kiss you. Just holding you is enough. There will be more than enough time for kisses later. “Yeah, I like the idea of that.”

Namjoon takes you to the deep end, still holding you up, past the point where your feet can touch the bottom. The warm water and his warm body around you feels so good. You can feel his hard cock pressed between you and your stomach (it’s kind of hard to ignore the literal third leg that Namjoon has) but there’s no rush to do anything about it as he holds you. No rush to abandon the quiet and the gently falling dusk.

The pink petals that dance on the surface of the hot water like stars dance upon the night sky. The steam rises up around you and water gathers on Namjoon’s lower lip.

Namjoon does not try and touch you, he doesn’t slide his hands down to your ass, he just pulls back to look at you and yet keeps you snug. Your nipples are hard, brush his skin, and you hiss, sensitive. He doesn’t need to say anything, doesn’t need to do anything but hold you in the water.

He sways on his tippy toes, and you kick your feet a little, he has a good hold on you but just barely, laughing softly. He meanders back to where it's shallow and he can hold you properly, an apology in his smile. You've got one hand around the back of his neck, your cheek resting against his chest listening to the rabbit hum of his heartbeat, your eyes drooping a little, eyelids heavy.

His hand pets through your hair, tangling at the nape of your neck. Cradling you close. “Thank you for coming all this way with me, I really wanted this, just-” His arms tighten around you, “Just this. Physical intimacy isn’t just sex and cuddling. This is perfect.”

“Yeah,” you say, your voice blocked out by the sound of his heartbeat- or is it yours that you can hear awfully loud? beating rapidly, thudding harder and harder.

It's weird, your heart is beating so fast but you still feel so tired. so tired you just might-

“I know I don’t say it often, but I- I really love you; I need to say it more often.” You want to say it back but your mouth is just so sluggish, so tired. Your arms start to go slack around his neck. “I love you so much pup.”

In the silence, the gurgle of the water grows louder and louder and louder.

“Pup?” Namjoon pulls away from you for a second to look at your face. Without your arms around his neck, you sink like a lead weight. The water slides past your mouth.

“Pup!”

~-~

(The pack, now)

In the wake of you and Namjoon leaving everything feels a little bit off kilter. A little bit not right.

No sooner has the car pulled out of the driveway and your scent has dissipated from the house than Jin is stifling his sniffles and excusing himself to the bathroom only to come back smelling soggy and hormonal and with red-rimmed eyes.

Yoongi casts worried glances in the direction of the driveway and Jimin and Jungkook come back from their run, with a huff and a giggle of thudding feet on the porch. Having nearly everyone home does little to settle or lighten the mood.

They come inside, sweaty and yet cold, scents sweetening until they don't. Hobi watches them realize, almost comically that the den is two packmates short. Jimin goes into Tae's library room and returns empty-handed. Jungkook looks from the couch to Jin's side, his smile falling. “Did they leave already?”

Jin covers his nose with his sleeve. Scowling in Jungkook's direction. “Yeah, about an hour ago.”

“Damn,” Jungkook pouts, “I really wanted to see them off.”

Jin turns back to his pancakes with a huff before Jimin can catch his eye.  Jimin moves close, but Jin sidesteps him so fluidly that Hobi could almost convince himself that it is just that- fluid and thoughtless.

But Hobi’s not sure. Something feels off. Jin’s scent is too sour, too disjointed like the sweetness and sourness are separate notes for it to be entirely incidental. Jin wrinkles his nose, eyes on the batter, whisking it smooth (he'd deemed the first batch non-palatable and started all over again, under the threat of tears), “Can you shower Jiminie? And would someone open the windows- it’s stifling in here.”

Jimin is a good alpha, just nods and looks Jin over. “Okay hyung, are you okay?”

“I’m fine Minnie just-“ Jin ignores Jimin’s puppy eyes and Jungkook’s and Tae’s (Yoongi still hasn’t torn his eyes off of the driveway) gesturing wildly with the whisk. “If you don’t all settle then you'll have to have breakfast on the table instead of the couch where I know you stinky little pups want to eat it. I’ll count to three. One”

That’s all it takes, and the three of them are leaping hand over hand to sit on the couch instead. Jin fluffs back, satisfied at being obeyed. Hobi stays close. Jimin scents over Tae’s shoulder and then heads upstairs.

“Let me help?” Hobi offers, and Jin nods, sidestepping him once again as Hobi reaches around him to turn on the electric griddle.

Hobi doesn’t play music while they cook for the sake of Saturday morning cartoons (they’re not cartoons- just the episode of the drama that Tae missed last night when she decided she’d rather retreat upstairs with you and Hobi instead of watching it with Jin. And it’s a Wednesday, not a Saturday) the familiar just-seen sounds do not lull Jin into a reverie, because Jin is not easily lulled this morning.

Something is wrong with Jin hyung, and he just won’t say what.

Instead of retreating to the couch to cuddle like Hobi can tell Jin needs, he just keeps cooking. Even though Hobi's usually the one who handles pancakes, makes them into nice hearts and stars and squiggles. Not the weird and lopsided ovals that Jin makes. Jin just can’t sit down or stop moving, can't stop the feeling like something bad will happen if he stops-

An animal claws at his chest, a feeling without a name, hungry and frightened. A wolf backed into a corner will bite and Jin feels claustrophobic- something pressing in around him from all sides.

Your scent and Jungkook’s scents are the only ones unoffensive for some reason (Yoongi's would be too- if he didn't smell so worried), maybe it's because you're among the lowest in the hierarchy. Hobi's is a little better- if only because he smells like soft alpha instead of heady strong alpha. Hobi’s caramel scent is mild. At ease.

For that reason alone, he's allowed to stay close. 

Something in Jin's chest purrs when he gets Jin a plate for the finished pancakes. What a good alpha, what a capable alpha. So thoughtful.

Pack Alpha chose well.

Pack alpha? Where is alpha? Abandoned? Alone? Pup? Where is pup? Stole pup. Bad alpha. Nest thief. Icky alphas shouldn't steal pups that don't belong to them. Need pup. Need nest, need pack alpha, need-

Jin breathes in for 5 and out for 9. Unsure why his instincts are making a rare appearance this morning, why he's feeling his inner omega chomping at the edges of his mind for a chance to get out.

He busies himself making more pancakes than any one pack could conceivably eat in one morning. No matter how many times Hobi and Tae ask him to just rest. To put the batter away for later, he just hums at them and moves on.

It’s like he’s worried he’ll lose his momentum if he sits. Standing in front of the sizzling griddle with a spatula in hand his pout ever-present. Making more and more pancakes even though almost everyone is full. Jimin comes back and takes a good stack. Jin almost purrs in satisfaction.

Jin hasn’t even eaten a single one.

Jungkook watches Jin from the kitchen island where he munches on his plate, not taking his eyes off of the other omega. Lips glossy from maple syrup.

The pancakes pile up high with no one to eat them and the hours drag on and on. Past the time when you and Namjoon should have arrived at the onsen. Jungkook’s cheeks are sticky and round with the bites. Jin says he’s not hungry, but the truth is his stomach is roiling with nausea.

Yoongi and Hobi cast glances at each other over his head, at least whenever Yoongi tares his focus away from the driveway.

Jin hyung might be inconsolable, but Yoongi's distress is a little more manageable. He steps close as they wash dishes, bumping elbows and trying to catch the beta's eye. “Want to go for a drive later hyung?”

If Hobi asked you he knows you’d be up and out the door without another word. But Yoongi is not you. Yoongi just glances, looking from Hobi to the front door nervously.

Something is definitely up.

After a moment Yoongi just shakes his head, and Hobi tries not to feel a little disappointed. “Sorry Daisy, just-” Something flickers across Yoongi’s face. He’s really bad at keeping secrets, Hobi doesn't know how he kept the whole mafia thing under wraps for so long. His concern for you is so palpable that Hobi almost wants to call you just to alleviate it.

(That wouldn't be right, the whole pack had agreed to leave your and Namjoon's time alone, to give you both space this weekend. It's okay. It's going to be okay; they'll survive.)

(This sucks, not having everyone togeather sucks, everything sucks.)

Maybe Hobi doesn't understand Yoongi's single-minded focus- not being mated and all. Does Yoongi feel your absence like a physical ache? Or is it more of a wound without any blood? What does it feel like- to have your soul-bonded partner so far away?

The beta hums, looking back out the window. Noodle is out there, in the middle of the cul-de-sac staring yoongi down through the kitchen window.

Yoongi flinches. "Jesus Christ that fucking cat-"

Hobi glances up and smiles. Noodle's tail goes up and he trots to the front door at the sight of Hobi in the window. Hobi snorts, "He's just like you waiting for her to come home."

“He is not like me, if I was a cat I'd be less fluffy. And probably black."

"Whatever you say hyung."

Jin snorts, getting in on it, acting normal for the first time in hours and Hobi wants to sag against the countertop in relief. "You'd have a rat tail. it would have like no hair."

"Would not"

"Would too-"

Jimin's footsteps thunder down the stairs. "I'd be a Calico!"

"You'd be a munchkin Minnie- not a calico."

"Can I be a Norwegian forest cat? The orange ones? They're so pretty!"

Tae prattles on about Warrior Cats, one of the first series that she ever read, and everyone lets her talk about the story because everyone is sort of hopelessly in love with Tae. As the only girl home right now- she deserves a little bit of indulging.

Jungkook stays silent, watching Jin. It's a little unnerving like Noodle watching Yoongi through the open window. Jin ignores him.

Hobi puts the bowl of pancake batter to the side. Reaching out to tangle his hand with Yoongi, kicking a hip against the counter. “You sure getting out of here might not help you for a little bit?” It's a weak offering even to Hobi's own ears. Yoongi tips his head to the TV.

"It's just getting good, maybe- maybe later?" Hobi hums in agreement, later he can handle. Later still means there might be more instead of outright rejection. 

On the screen, the K-drama villain has a predictable meltdown about a trivial work conflict. Tae sits with her legs folded under her at rapt attention.

There is a brush between her and Jimin on the couch. Hobi wishes he could capture the way that Jimin is looking at her and save it to show you. He's drinking in her little ohs and ahs like they're ambrosia as he combs her hair back and does her little French braids. Jimin has been practicing. Hobi watches as he delicately tucks her little baby hairs into the twist, not missing a single one.

Tae's bubblegum mouth widens at the love confession on screen. "I knew it! I knew he couldn't have secondary lead syndrome!" Jimin just huffs letting Tae shift moving with her before the braids have a chance to pull out of his hands.

"You were right" he agrees, "I shouldn't have been suspicious." Tae glances back at him, smiles in that told you so but I'm not going to say it way, and then turns back. Hobi smiles a little; he’s so down bad.

Jungkook sits at the kitchen island instead of the couch, alternating between watching the TV and watching Jin. Eyes bright with suspicion.

Jin flips each of the pancakes in quick secession, goes back to whipping up fresh batter, and then goes back to flipping so quick that it almost gives Hobi whiplash. Yoongi notices it too, goes over to Jin’s side trying to touch his elbow but is met with a short-tempered glare.

“Jinnie honey, I think you’ve made enough pancakes.”

Jin scoffs and continues, it doesn’t matter that it’s well into the afternoon now, that really- they could and should be making dinner at this point. The whole day has come and gone with the pack just like this, cooking pancakes and watching Jin like he’s a ticking time bomb.

“Just one more-” Yoongi sighs. Jin goes back to flipping the pancakes. Doing it with too much force, too much finesse.

Jin tries to flip one and misses. It lands batter-side down on the floor with a wet thwack.

Hobi, Yoongi, Jungkook, and Jin all look at it for a second. And then Jin sort of predictably- sort of out of nowhere, bursts into tears.

“Hyung? Hyung, what’s up? Hey don’t-"

Jin scrubs at his eyes angrily, shaking his head and stopping Hobi from cupping his cheeks. Side-stepping Yoongi’s out-stretched hands, and slapping the entire metal bowl of pancake batter (still a quarter full) into the sink with a loud clang of dishes and ceramic. Maybe something breaks.

He waves off Hobi’s hands, big rivulets carving their way down his cheeks.

Jimin reaches to pause the drama. Getting up in about two seconds, detangling himself from Tae with a startled, “hyung?”

Jungkook huffs and everything feels dissonant. How is it that everything feels off with just you and Namjoon gone? Everyone is a little on edge. If Namjoon were here he’d just hug Jin and everything would be fine. If you were here- you’d bound up between both Hobi and Yoongi and make them go on a walk with you to see more flowers and it would be just that- easy and effortless.

This is not easy, and the effort is palpable. The way that Jin has to steady his breath and articulate his words. “Nothing’s wrong. I’m fine just-”

Jin shares a look with Yoongi and Yoongi looks away.

Now Hobi really feels left out, hands tightening, looking from one packmate to another, “what’s wrong? What aren’t you guys saying? Why are you crying?”

Jungkook’s lips smack together with the sound of syrup sticking to his plush lips. His fork scrapes dully against his plate and Hobi grits his teeth. 

“What?” he stresses.

Jungkook just shrugs and chews. “Yoongi's upset because he knew Y/n was in pre-heat but he let her leave anyway and now he's regretting it” The ice water feeling of shock settling over his whole body is enough that Hobi almost misses Jungkook’s next words. “-And Jin Hyung’s upset because he’s in pre-heat too and just doesn’t want to admit it. Because if he admits it then it means that his alpha left his nest with his pup and that makes him feel sad. He’s feeling sensitive so don't tease.”

Are you in pre-heat? Is this really happening? Hobi thinks back to how you’d looked when you’d left; How you’d looked cold just standing in the kitchen, looked a little ashen too- like you hadn’t been able to wake up all the way.

You hadn’t looked like you were going into pre-heat this morning- granted going into heat looks a little different on every omega but you were nothing like Jin is now; snappish, overstimulated, bratty. If anything, you’d just looked tired and a little cold. almost like…

Almost like your body was telling you to stay put. To stay and nest where it’s safe.

Only you hadn’t listened, and now you're three hours away from them with only one alpha instead of the many you'll need.

Hobi feels so many things in quick succession. One second shocked the next insecure and sort of disappointed in himself for not realizing it and being more attuned with his packmates. The next thing he feels is begrudging relief because Hobi's not being a bad packmate; none of them know just what your pre-heat looks like yet. They can all be forgiven for not noticing- Even Yoongi who despite the mating bond has never seen you in heat before.

There's also a possibility that they're wrong too- you could be going into a false heat, or you could just have been looking sick this morning. There is no real way to know without you here. If you actually are in heat, Namjoon will notice.

Jin is another story.

Jin's pre-heats never look like this.

Usually, he starts them feeling needy and over-tired. Sometimes his temperature drops because Jin's body is trying to force him to nest. the same way yours might have been this morning.

Then his body pushes him closer and closer to omegaspace. That's the first tip-off; because Jin doesn't need omegaspace the same way you or Jungkook do. Whereas you get almost babyish, sluggish, and tiny- Jin gets pouty and mothering like a broody hen.  It's the difference between pack-omegaspace and regular omegaspace.

Suddenly, the pile of pancakes makes a lot of sense. Jin isn't just making sure his own body is prepared for his heat, but the rest of theirs is too. His nestmates, his pups.

9 times out of 10 Namjoon knows before Jin does, tells him, warns him and the rest of them, and the pack has more time to prepare. Jungkook is a little more sporadic, rarely ever goes cold before he goes hot, just treads straight into a fever and omegaspace zoomies that slowly melts into a need to be bred full.

But when Hobi breathes deep he catches it- the faintest hint of cloying sweetness drawing them in. Breeding hormones are to an alpha like a moth is to a flame and Jin is only just starting to smell sweeter. He's so upset that Hobi can hardly make sense of the sweetness in the sourness of his scent.  

That's the thing about broody pack omega's- they go protective before they go sweet.

Jin goes from upset to angry quick enough to give the whole pack whiplash. Enough that Jimin has to get in between Yoongi and him with the way Jin lunges. Jin's teeth snap sending the rest of the reeling. Jimin is several heads shorter than Jin, and can’t contain him or the anger of an omega on a hormone high.     Jin's hiss is acidic as he grips Yoongi's shoulders around Jimin, “You let my pup go away, you let my pup go when she could be in heat? Have you lost your mind?”

For what it’s worth Yoongi does not flinch. He doesn’t even move away when Jin grabs him by his chubby cheeks. Jin looks like he hasn’t even absorbed the second part of Jungkook’s message.

“Namjoon’s clueless when it comes to heats! He’s an alpha- he’s not going to be able to help her nest or keep her safe or-” Jin pales, actually goes white as a sheet. Yoongi’s teeth worry at his lower lip.

“She wanted to go, she wanted to make her own choices and she said she wasn’t in pre so I trusted her.”

“She is a pup Yoongi!” Jin bares his teeth. Eyes wild, that picture of a pack omega whose nest has just been threatened. Whose pup has just been stolen.

“She deserves to decide what she wants to do for herself- if she wants to spend her heat with just Namjoon then we’ve got to respect that."

Jin doesn’t like it- how Yoongi’s talking back. He Likes what Yoongi's insinuating even less: that you wouldn’t want the pack to help you through your heat, that you do not need them.

But you do need them. You need them for everything like a pup would. To remind you to brush your hair and be safe and careful. You certainly need them to mind your pleasure and well-being like a garden. You need your pack omega. Yoongi is being stupid. He needs Jin to guide him too- Obviously.

Jin moves, dragging Yoongi over to the kitchen island. For what it's worth Yoongi doesn't fight him or tell him off. Looking just as shocked by the turn of events as they all are. Jin looks a little wild. Tae hides her laugh behind a hand.

It’s not often Jin takes the Hyungs over his lap for a spanking. Hobi just sighs from behind his ruffled apron when he realizes what's about to happen.

“In front of my pancakes hyung? Really?”

Jin holds Yoongi’s nape in between his fingers and bends him low over the counter before dispensing a volley of swats over his behind. they're not hard, Yoongi looks more shocked than scolded. More turned on than upset.

“My pup does not belong to Namjoon!” Yoongi does not push against Jin’s grip because even he can see this is what Jinnie needs. If Jin really is in pre-heat then this is like a balm to his emotions- friable and feeble. Jin doesn't tolerate feeling out of control and if doling out a punishment is what he needs to feel steady then the whole pack will get on their knees.

Jin’s almost teary when he says it “She should be with me- especially if she’s in pre-heat. She’s mine- not Namjoon’s- not yours- mine.”

Other omega’s serve a purpose during the pack omega’s heat; they're there to make sure the nest stays tended to, prepared for pups and alpha’s. Other omega’s are there to warm and fluff and cuddle between the spikes of heat when the need for a knot becomes a need for simple closeness. With scent and touch sensitivity heightened- a soft omega is the equivalent of a fresh breath of air.

(Even then, Jin’s anger at you for not being home is a little over the top. Especially given that out of all of them Yoongi has maybe the greatest incentive to want you home).

Jungkook knows this, he lets Jin have a few spanks, a dozen before he stands up, wipes his hands clean of sticky syrup, and reaches out to pinch Jin’s scent gland.

A whine shocks out of Jin’s throat and he clamps a hand over his mouth, blinking rapidly. The rest of the pack watches as the wild threatened look vanishes from Jin’s eyes and it’s like he’s lucid for a moment. He seems to realize what he’s doing looking down at the position he has Yoongi in. The beta’s flaming cheeks and shocked blinking. The vaguely amused look in Tae’s eyes, the gentle resignation and concern in Jungkook’s. He lets Yoongi go quickly, hands trembling.

“Fuck, I’m sorry.” Yoongi gets up, pink-cheeked, and Jin backs away from all of them. “I didn’t mean to do that- I didn’t even want to do that.” He’s close to tears again.  It’s not the first time one of them got an impromptu spanking from the pack omega. But what is shocking is Jin’s guilt.

There is a certain level of dominance that they've all agreed to all consented to being a part of this pack. Jin didn't even hurt Yoongi, and he's not thinking clearly. Hobi doubts there's even red marks.

Jin just needs an outlet for his instincts.

Jungkook stalks towards him, determined, and the hair on the back of Jin’s neck stands up.

“I think it’s cute that you’re so worried about her when you’re so clearly in pre-heat too hyung. Don't ignore me.”

Jin nearly snaps his teeth with how quick he goes toe to toe with the youngest. The alpha’s do worse regularly when tensions are high, but still it’s so strange to see Jin act anything like aggressive- especially directed against the youngest and for hardly anything more than a cocky tone. Jin and Jungkook go toe to toe.

“I’m not ignoring you, you're just wrong. I’m not in pre-heat."

Jungkook just grins and reaches out to touch Jin’s chest. Cupping him where he knows he’s sensitive. Jin lets out a high-pitched keen and almost sags, would probably fall if Jungkook didn't catch him by the elbow. 

It makes every alpha in the room stand to attention. Sit up. Nervous. “Sensitive here, right? And you still want to say you’re not- when you’ve been snappy the whole day because you just want to nest and not be upright- when you just want what your alphas aren’t giving you- your omega’s and your knots.”

Jin bites his lips, covering his chest with his hands and stepping back. Looking a little stunned. “You’re in pre-heat hyung.”

The whole room is silent, but after a second, Hobi reaches for Jin’s phone on the counter. “I’m calling Namjoon.”

Jin’s hand wraps around Hobi’s wrist stopping him- his upper lip lifts in a near feral hiss.

“Don’t you fucking dare.”

~-~

(You and namjoon)

You wrap the terry cloth robe around you more firmly, fighting back a blush as the manager of the onsen stands up from your side. If she were an alpha, things would be a lot different and you doubt that Namjoon would let her get at all close to you. But Namjoon doesn’t have any problem with letting her check you over, verifying that the water wasn’t too hot and that everything is fine.

Everything is far from fine.

There had to have been some reason for you to pass out no more than an hour ago. You didn’t just fall asleep- that much you know, after coming too to black spots in your vision and dizziness so complete you doubt you could stand without falling over right now. To Namjoon frantically calling your name and covering you with a towel.

Everything smells a little off too- a little dampened, you paw at your nose, wondering why you can’t seem to smell the omega- given she’s old. But you can’t smell Namjoon either. It’s a little distressing, not being able to smell your pack alpha. Your nose doesn’t feel stuffy.

Weird.

Namjoon checked you over too. You’d already sort of been coming around after he dragged your limp body out of the hot water, but he’d been a little startled. You’re kind of thankful that his frantic call had fucked up, that he’d accidentally called the front desk instead of 911 if only to spare yourself the embarrassment of a trip to the hospital and probably a trip home.  

You feel too sluggish for that- like everything is moving at 2x speed and your brain is on pause. Now, you rub at your nose and let Namjoon and the omega duke it out. “It was probably just the heat of the onsen. Young omegas tend to be a little more affected by sharp temperature changes.”

Namjoon grits his teeth, “she’s taken hot baths before.”

The elderly omega raises her eyebrow, “In magnesium-rich water?”

Namjoon deflates and admits “No” after a second. She stands from the bed and nods like her work is done. “it was in the pamphlet. I recommend you rest well tonight and then enjoy it in the morning, you’ve traveled far.” Namjoon holds your hand tight. His fingers pressed to your wrist, feeling the flutter of your pulse against his skin.

“The pamphlet?” The manager hunts it down, and after a second digs it out from under the bed, cast from the bed to the floor by the mishap with your suitcase. Leave it to Joonie to be so excited he didn’t look before he put it down. Properly scolded, Namjoon takes the pamphlet.

Namjoon says something to the old lady in the doorway, comes back inside with a few plastic shopping bags, and you remember the food. It must have been delivered sometime in the last hour, because it still looks and smells hot when he sets it on the side table.

Huh, your nose doesn't seem to have any problem smelling the food- just Namjoon. Weird.

Namjoon’s looking at you in a way that you’re familiar with. The same way he looks at Jungkook after his seizures. “Can you get me a shirt?” Namjoon gives you one of his, probably the one he’d planned on sleeping in. He watches as you pull it over your head, watches as it pools on your bare thigh.

It’s nighttime now, and the lights outside are mainly pointed up at the trees lighting them from below. You leave the large glass doors open, cautioning in some of the warm sweet-smelling air and a few cherry blossoms inside. They flutter and stick to the big puddles on the wooden floor. Puddles from you when Namjoon dragged you out of the water catch the light like silver.

Namjoon’s medical bag is already on the side. He must have gotten it from the car although you’re not sure when. You look at him and he tucks his chin looking a bit like a kicked puppy. The concern in his eyes makes you feel all warm in your stomach.

“Are you going to keep looking at me like that until you check me again?”

“Yes” you make a noise, and surrender yourself to him again, Namjoon moves- almost jaunty.

He checks your blood pressure again, the movement behind your eyes with a small flashlight, you follow his instructions like the good pup you are. Everything quiet except for the faint trickle of water outside and the low hum of his voice.

When Namjoon asks you to lean forward so that he can sneak a stethoscope onto your back and listen to your lungs and heart, you nose and nuzzle at his shoulder. Eyelashes fluttering. After a few moments, he makes to stand back but your arms tug him close, keep him that way, almost purring.

Now you know why you couldn’t smell him earlier- it’s because you weren’t close enough, now you’re under his thumb you can finally smell him again and he smells so musky. You drink him in, rubbing small circles with your nose.

"Pup" he stresses. You pay him no mind.

Namjoon smells good today. Really really good. you’re not sure what it is but- he smells richer, maybe not any different than usual- but almost like you can sense more. Pick up on every little thing, every pulse of his heartbeat makes his scent flutter out stronger like a ripple. Promising safety and protection. You really are going to start purring.

Namjoon stops you the second before you try to bite him.

You blink up at him, mouth open. His hand grips your cheeks and you close your mouth with a faint click. "Sorry- I don't know why I-" Namjoon bites his lip while you rub your eyes, he waits until you can quiet the purring in your throat. You search for the word, “purry? bitey?”

“It’s fine,” Namjoon’s still watching you like a hawk.

You blink slowly, eyelids heavy. You’re still really tired, really drowsy. “Then why are you looking at me like that?”

“Your heart rate is a little slow. I’m worried.”

“I’m fine Joonie.” He looks at your lips and then your eyes, “really.” You shake yourself awake a little. “Wanna eat so much food we get a food coma and then sleep it off?” It’s barely 6pm but it sounds like a good idea. Namjoon tosses his stethoscope into the chair in the corner of the room and sighs.

Luckily- someone else but Tae seems to have a hand in at least packing you one or two comfy sets of clothes. You’re mostly clean, too sleepy and dizzy to think about showering again. You dress deftly in your pj’s and Namjoon dresses with his and sets out the food you rest up against the bed, it’s not as good as your nest but still- the sheets are smooth and soft.

You wrinkle your nose, you can’t smell anyone but Namjoon, lifting your sleeve to your nose you breathe a deep breath and get a bit of Jin and Jungkook- that does more to settle you.

It’s been a long time since you’ve nested without either of them or their scents. You’re not sure you like it, you’re not sure you want to nest here.

Namjoon comes back with the rest of the food, but leaves it in a heap on the side table. There’s a lump in his throat and his scent sours. “I’m sorry this isn’t more fun.”

You reach over to squeeze his hand, “It’s okay Joonie, and this is fun. I’m sorry I passed out.”

Your pack alpha shakes his head, “not your fault. We’ll just wait until you get a bit more rest. We can enjoy it tomorrow, right?” You nod, and shuffle over to the edge of the bed so you can kiss him. His pout turns into a smile against your mouth but it still feels like an apology.

“Even just lying here- pinging out on food is still gonna be fun.” Your tone turns to tease. “I mean I know we both through this was supposed to be like a romantic vacation rather than a vacation vacation but-"

Namjoon shakes his head, “I just want to spend time with you.”   

The two of you get fat and happy on dumplings and pork fried rice, the kind of salty bad American Chinese food that you and Namjoon are both familiar with, that you both like even if the rest of the pack doesn’t.

Over the next hour with the TV droning and the warm air wafting into the room- you talk about everything. Spilling peach rings and gummy bears and red vines onto the bedspread. Your feet against his shins, your legs over his lap.

You talk about everything- your childhoods, the fact that yoongi's really close to finishing renovations on the house, getting Noodle a sibling. All of it. That one time that Jimin and Hobi had a competition to see who could eat the most crab Rangoon's in a single sitting and almost vomited. Everything. Reclined back against the bed. You can almost fool yourself into thinking that you’re alright, that nothing is wrong.

But then you get up to brush your teeth.

Namjoon is just shutting the door and the outside lights, turning your room into a pocket of dim yellow light. half of the food put away in the mini fridge but the other half still out and open for grazing. Everything has started to feel cozy and sleepy again and maybe- maybe tomorrow when you wake up, you'll finally feel better.

You’re just rounding the corner into the bedroom, toothbrush hanging out of your mouth when the cramping hits you.

“Ow ow ow what the fuck-”

You almost drop to your knees at the pain, crouching over, catching yourself on the doorway. curling over, anything to release the pressure, the horrible tenseness and unfamiliar pain in your stomach. You go white as a sheet and Namjoon looks so startled. Shouting your name and jumping over the bed, knocking over an open and nearly full container of fried pork rice plain onto the ground. Your toothbrush falls onto the hotel room floor.

“Pup! What’s wrong!? What’s-” Namjoon’s hands are on your shoulders and You’re still holding your stomach, blinking back the tears in your eyes and whimpering. Namjoon pries your fingers away from your stomach to see- but there’s nothing. Namjoon touches your stomach- and you keen.

Namjoon’s nostrils flare. And he picks you up from where you’re crumpled on the floor. It’s not so difficult for him, although he sets you down on the bed with less finesse.

The cramping lasts for a few more seconds. You’re panting by the time it dissipates. Namjoon makes it so so much better- rubbing a soothing hand up and down your spine, tucking his chin over the ball of your shoulder, and holding you. Ushering you as close to his chest and neck as he can. Something about your alpha being close makes all of this better- makes the cramps subside.

“It’s okay pup, it’s okay, I’ve got you, alphas got you.”

Namjoon’s muscles are shaking. He waits until the cramping stops and you're just breathing heavily. But then he sets you back gently against the bed. You’re dazed and dizzy where you lie. Whining in displeasure when Namjoon pulls away. Trying to guide your hands away from your stomach. shanking your head as he tries to get you to stop holding it.

“Let me see pup, let me see- Omega.”

Your body breaks out into full body shivers, hands going limp, you freeze and bear your throat so quick you don't even realize what you're doing. Head spinning. room spinning. Your Focus narrows down to Namjoon and his command, Namjoon and what he wants Namjoon and-

His eyebrows are knit together and he’s concentrating on something- thinking hard as he gently detangles your hands

Namjoon swallows, then leans down. Ducking in and sniffing at your stomach. Breathing deep. Nose brushing your naval.

He jerks back abruptly, eyes wide.

Namjoon bursts into action, crossing the room and going into the bathroom where he starts to shove your clothes into your suitcase. Everything from the crumpled lingerie that had tumbled out earlier, to his dirty clothes and bathing suit, everything shoved back inside with little care.

“Fuck- fuck-“

You sit up, hair ruffled, “Joonie?” Your dress for tomorrow night gets stuffed into the suitcase roughly, with little care for the delicate silk he can’t get it closed around the hanger.

“We’re going home.” Namjoon looks so stressed, you half wish you’d never driven all the way out here in the first place.

“What? Why-“

Namjoon’s phone is on the bed and buried in the sheets, but it starts to ring, its tone loud and shrill. Namjoon hesitates, looking at you and then at the phone. But it’s Hobi's contact, and you reach for it almost before he does.

“Hyung thank god-” someone's shouting in the background, it’s Tae even if Hobi's phone is calling. Namjoon put it on speaker but the overlap of loud voices makes the speaker on his phone crackle.

“Give me the phone- I can-” “No let her speak!” You’ve never heard Yoongi sound so bratty, Jungkook whines and it’s hard to tell exactly who hit the phone and Who exactly called. Their voices overlap, everyone is trying to speak at once. “Stop squirming-” "hurry up, Hobi can only distract him for so long."

Namjoon doesn’t need to raise his voice to get them to comply, just says “Guys!” in a slightly stern tone and they all fall silent.

“Something’s happening, I’m coming home- we- she’s-” Namjoon looks at you, and you get the sense that he knows something and he’s just not telling you.

“Oh, thank god” Yoongi sounds relived.

“Please hurry,” Jimin asks, but Jungkook comes over, snapping his reply.

“We need to tell him- Jin hyung-" There’s a sound of skin hitting skin, and muffled voices like someone just put their hand over Jungkook’s mouth.

Namjoon does not look away from the phone, hand tightening around it. “Wait what’s wrong? What’s going on with Jin?”

You perk up at the sound of his name. The pack omega? What possibly could be going on that they need to tell you about. “Omega?” You ask, and Namjoon almost hisses.

“Pup" The relief and tiredness is palpable in Jin's voice, he sounds substantially less stern when he hears your voice. "I’m fine, pup, just-” Silence again. You wish they’d face timed, that you could see their faces and they could see yours.

“We waited until we were sure and Jin hyung didn’t want to say anything because he didn’t want to ruin your vacation but- but-” Jungkook stutters and Jimin comes in behind him. At the sound of one of your alpha’s, you chirp. Slapping a hand over your mouth in surprise.

“Jin hyung is in heat.”

You hear a sound, something like a door opening, and Jin's stern tone comes through the line. "You better not be doing what I think you're doing. I told you I didn't want to tell them until tomorrow morning."  Jin sounds cross, sounds actually angry.

Namjoon looks down at you, gaze conflicted. “Fucking hell.”

“I know- I’m sorry, we waited until we were sure but he started feeling crampy a few minutes ago-”

You touch your own stomach, crampy. Huh that means-

"No, I'm not upset just-” 

You take the phone from Namjoon, “alpha.” Your keen is so breathy, you don’t know what tips Hobi off if it’s that or the breathlessness to your voice, the way you sound close to tears.

Leaving the den was a very very bad idea. Jimin falls silent on the other line, everyone is quiet for a moment, but then the phone explodes with the sound of arguing.

"I was right! I told you she was in heat hyung's- I told you so!"

"Jungkook, now is so not the time-"

"Ow!"

There's the sound of squabbling, someone pushing at someone else maybe. something hits the phone and it makes a muffled crackling sound. "Jinnie- no biting- hey- no- guys."

You and Namjoon look at the phone, and everyone is silent for a second before you lean over it. "Daddy?"

the sounds of a tussle cut off. “Pup” Jin sounds so sad over the line, not at all like he just bit someone. “Can you come home? I think I’m gonna go crazy if you’re not-”

“Yeah, Namjoon’s already packing.”

“Thank god,” Jin sounds close to tears, you’re dizzy, but not so dizzy and out of it that you don't grasp the gravity of the situation. not so dizzy that you can’t do what you need to. Jin sounds so so sad.

"I didn’t want it to be this way, I wanted your first heat with us to be just you- so I could take care of you, but it doesn't look like it's going to turn out that way.”

“Can you make me a nest Jinnie? A heat nest? I can’t, I don’t know how.”

“Yes.” Jin says, voice going husky. “Gonna make you the best heat nest, gonna be so cozy. Gonna be perfect.” He promises, and you smile. He’s already feeling hazy, you can tell.

You’re feeling hazy too. Cheek falling against the bed, trying to nuzzle into the phone. “Can’t wait, wanna nest with you-”  

“Shit.” “Jin don’t fall over- here-” you hear a thump, like someone’s guiding him to a chair.

Namjoon takes control of the situation. “I’ll let you know when we’re on the road.”

“No- don’t text and drive.”

“Love you, bye, see you in a bit.” Namjoon hangs up and heaves the suitcase up onto the bed to finish packing. You start to move, but he shoots you a look. “Stay here, I’ll carry you.”

“Joonie it’s just pre-heat, I can still walk-”

Namjoon shoves your clothes, your bikini, into the confines of the suitcase. Red strings tangle in his fingers. “Don’t care.”

“But-” Namjoon darts forward, looming over you and you have to fight the urge to tilt your head to the side and show your neck. Holding you by the chin a little roughly. It has the desired effect.

Your instincts preen, alpha's so good. Alpha's so strong, knows just how to handle you. Your heartbeat quickens, and Namjoon glowers. “I think if I don’t get you home right now, and back to the den I might go-” Namjoon hesitates, and you see it, how he trembles. How he gently guides you to sit back on the bed. And you recognize the stress in his voice.

An alpha and an omega outside of their den during a heat is a scary thing. Namjoon's instincts are so close to the surface. You hope you don't see anyone on your way out. If anyone looked at you too long you don't know what Namjoon might do. 

Namjoon will not go feral at the idea of his omega suffering through a heat outside of the Den. Namjoon will not go crazy. He will drive you back to the house at an appropriate speed, and you won’t go into heat on the way home because realistically you have at least another 24 hours before either of your heats hit fully.

Most pre-heats last anywhere from 24 to 48 hours, Jin’s are always a little longer because he's older.

Yours? He’s not so sure about.

Your eyelashes flutter and your scent spikes. He strokes reassuringly down your scent gland and you pant, you feel it all the way at the tips of your fingers, trembling. It's so good having Namjoon touch you there. You clench your thighs and whine as he pulls away. And you know that's as much as he can give you right now. To settle your instincts for the drive and to settle himself too.

This is the moment the pack has been waiting for. The moment they’ve carefully coached you towards with every meal and every bit of encouragement. In many ways- each courting gift was meant for this moment. Every blanket and pillow, every stuffed animal and matching pajama set was all for this; the moment you’d need every soft thing, every strong alpha you have at your fingertips.

They won’t fail you now. Namjoon won’t fail either of you.

“How long was your last pre-heat last pup?”

You blink, thinking back while he stoops to put on your socks, you are a little cold you realize, your body reallocating heat to your internal organs, leaving your extremities chilly and trembling. Contrary to popular belief- heats don’t always mean fever. Sometimes they mean you get so cold that you need other bodies to keep you warm.

You’re at that stage now, no wonder why the water earlier made you sleepy- complete and total warmth is what you need right now- what your body craves is a nest and your packmates. You can’t regulate your temperature on your own- you need the others to do it for you.

“It wasn’t quick, like- maybe 30 hours, granted I didn’t really realize I was going into heat so I’m not sure, I don’t-” Somehow, you don’t think this one will give you quite so much time to adjust. Namjoon soothes you with a finger running down the back of your neck, he won’t scruff you unless you need him to- worried that it will send you prematurely hurtling into heat.

They need to be careful- Namjoon needs to be careful. This is your first heat in a long long time and your body might behave unpredictably. They need to be careful not to bring it on too strong.

You need people who won't trigger you too quick, you need Jin and Jungkook and Yoongi.

You think it might come quick, with how intense all of this is feeling. Every step Namjoon takes away makes you anxious. Excites that prey part animal of you that knows you’ll be vulnerable for the next few days- probably the whole week.

Namjoon locks the door while he puts the suitcase in the car and then comes back for you. Taking no chances. “Namjoon,” you say, when he comes back into the hotel room. You gesture to the mess on the floor between your feet. The box of takeout that he upended on his race to get to you when you collapsed.

“What are we gonna do about the mess?"

~-~

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Notes:

this chapter ended up alot more sexual than i planned for it too. i know i promised fluff but- it is really sexual in nature and i'm only realizing that now.

i realize that in my head the actuall toilet part of the bathroom upstairs was in a seperate little room like- almost a half bath inside the bath? but i can change it just for this part because it's like- bily is my sandbox and i can play in it <3

i don't know why sertian parts of the omega x omega dynamic really really apeals to me like- almost more than the alpha x omega parts do sometimes.

its really soft and just a tiny easter egg- but when hobi talks about planting the magnolia tree- i need everyone to know that namjoon and jin's first daughter ends up being namged magnolia- or maggie for short, and she's a little carbon copy of namjoon and a total tom boy and ands up climbing it like, basically every day, it's like her chill spot <3

if we're getting down into the nitty gritty of what had happened in the hot tub scene between tae and hobi and the m/c i think hobi had been really really curious about the m/c's addictive slick but obviously- he's triggered by giving women oral sex from moonbyul so he's like- obviously nervous and doesn't want to like- actually have the m/c ride his face, tae tae knows this and probably spent all of that, scene feeding hobi little drops of the m/c's slick from her fingers, had probably made the m/c sit on the edge of the hot tub and bend back to show hobi how wet she gets and nose and nuzzle at her hole over her bathing suit before pulling it to the side and showing him that her pussy is so cute it's hardly scary. obviously hobi does not eat the m/c out but maybe tae can't resist.

i know there are alot of flash back's and little scenes in between the scene that's actually happening- i wonder if this is the way i should write them? do you guys like the part where they're talking about the free use? yoongi's flue? or should i have edited those parts out?

where it not for the m/cs heat- i think it would have taken yoongi and her until the following fall to be intimate again. it would have happened one day when she came in from her classes all cold and damp from october (is that a spoiler?) and he'd crumple and give it to her slow and warm.

tae and the m/c's scene in the bedroom was supposed to be alot more breif but i made it longer because i love mommy tae and i missed her<3

tae kissing over her panties is so???? feral and horny of her??? when will that be meeeee on both sides of it honestly? can you imagine having a cute little girlfriend that lets you dress them up???? the fantasy of having someone who wants you so much they just cuddle into you all the time??? tae is one lucky girl 😭

i worry that this chapter is going to be like the others where i delve too far into each little thing and the bigger picture of it all is lost by the end of it but! maybe i don't care- i want mommy tae so bad :(

i really really love that tae calls the rest of the pack "our boys" because really- they are tae and the m/c's boys like- thats so soft for her to call them that. how much do you think jimin would blush to be called "my little boyfriend" by tae??? i think he'd short circuit.

listen, i know that canonically bily takes place in boston but i just couldn't resist with the onsen- i know nothing like this exists on the east coast but still <3 i wanted to write it so i made it my own.

i really like how you kind of get a taste for the dynamic of everyone at home without namjoon and the m/c- like the moment when they're talking about what kind of cat they'd be if they where a cat is so cute and packy <3 i wish i had a pack like that.

broody jinnie broody jinnie brooody jinnie <3 i love love love describing him as a broody hen, because if you'd ever been around a broody hen you know they are so sweet! but protective!!! and fluffy! we have a hen thats broody right now and her name is wonton.

The m/c having cramps as apart of her pre-heat symptoms is because i was also having cramps while i was writing this part. as was the american chineese food part! cuz i was craving it <3

namjoon deserves some major kudos for this chapter because tell me why that boy suffers

[atrirose]

hi! <3 can i request enha hcs w/ an s/o that loves to baby them? like you're always calling them oddly endearing nicknames and being affectionate, like feeding them and running your hands through their hair, giving scalp massages... you just enjoy taking care of them and checking up on them

Title : enhypen with s/o that likes to baby them

Type : headcannons

Genre : fluff

Warning: none; not proof read

An. Srsly the request got all swamped up but I don't want to close the request also plz feel free to talk to me anytime. Ps I just noticed I have been spelling heeseung wrong :) rip im sorry my phone has its own mind

Heeseung : finds it amusing no really he would be smirking whenever you try to baby like "yeah right 😏" shit eating grinning :). Don't really care infact thanks heavens for such a caring s/o who feeds him ramen 🙄. I did mention he love shoulder rubs in my previous post and I'm gonna say it again, he finds himself super close to you when you do that. Sits with a straight and scary trying to foucs on work but as soon as you go "baby" he melts, will ignore everything.

Jay : has the funniest face when you call him pet names. Like sure he knows you like them and to a extent he doesn't mind but there are times when he just goes blank. You go "muffin what do you want to eat" and he stands there stiff face 😐😐 muffin was that supposed to be me (plz safe jay). Sometimes you do that on purpose "my sweet buttercup how was your day?". "Stop y/n I'm- WHAT DO YOU MEAN BUTTERCUP HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FUNCTION THAT." then you bust out laughing knowing you did that on purpose to tease you sweet baby.

Sunghoon : love hate relationship with your pet names. Loves when you call him ice prince but why did you call him penguin like why :( but still gets antsy if you don't call him penguin kinda messed up but you gotta deal with it😤😤. Scalp message, running your hands through his hair, applying oil or sampoo, literally anything with his hair he loves it, makes you do it, would like if your hands never left his hair alone, prefers it that way.

Jake : a puppy x200 times, baby him and you get the most bubbly and innocent smile ever. Eyes goes big and sparkling, "you think i did good🥺🥺 thanks ily" also goes feral for your pet names, the weirder the better, snuggles into you when you pet him. Likes to BE A SMALL SPOON. Puffy cheeks when you feed him.talks about how much he likes it when you pet him and kiss his cheeks when he is on your lap to the boys only to get eyerolls :( gets sad but you always cheer him up with your presence

Sunoo : can I even begin with this man, you baby him, he does it too, you call him pet names nah he gotta do it too and at some point it did become a competition for both of you to see who can do more. You don't know when it started or when it ended but it was still a petty phase for you both. He loves skin care but he loves it more when you do it for him. Stares at your face when you apply the face mask on him like literally looks at you with doe eyes, he is a hopeless romantic :(. Also loves it when you rant or talk about while doing his skin care routine on him , makes you melt at the way he looks at you with admiring eyes like he can't love nobody but you.

Jungwon : 🤫don't tell this to anyone but he likes it when you baby him. Being the young leader and a responsible kid. he might come as a mature boy despite being the younger one in his family, so it is a surprise that our leader here likes to be baby for you. Purrs like a cat when you brush your hands in his hair, huge goofy smiles when you squeeze his face, not a fan of pet names but doesn't mind it either. I mean you could be like "how is my little widdle pumpkin spice cupcake" and he will be like "oh,OH nah I'm fine what about you" like he just didn't get called pumpkin spice cupcake. SHOW SOME REACTION,,will actually give you messages and likes when you press your cold hands on his cheeks

Niki : is a baby which makes your inner caring side kick in no matter who it is. But if you do try to baby him he will tackle you, doesn't care will flip you off the bed, tackle you on the sofa, its not that he doesn't like it he just is awkward and shy and likes to express thinks in this way. Glares at you when you call him petnames also refuses to call you noona (or senpai/j) but he likes the shoulder massage you give him srsly so relaxed he sleeps in between. Thanks you the next day tho cuz he got manners.

[rezzyromance]

Idk if this is how you request things or if it's just asking, BUT-

How would the Lords react to an S/O that's usually the chillest person that you will ever meet (not to be confused with a pushover because they are not), they've never seen them even mildly annoyed when something bad happens. But then something happens and, turns out, the S/O is utterly TERRIFYING when they're mad.

Hope this makes sense!

Aw man I'm gonna feel awful scaring Moreau and Donna :(

Alcina

You're relaxing on a beautiful morning. The sun is shining through the window just enough to warm the room but not hurt your eyes. You hadn't even changed out of your sleep wear. "How are you feeling, my dear?", a sweet voice rang from the doorway. You were sitting in your favorite chair near the window. You turn and smile at her. She walks over and rubs your face in her large hand before leaning down and giving you a soft kiss. "I'm feeling amazing. And you?", you grab her hand before she pulls it away and you place a kiss on her knuckles. "I'm feeling alright. There's a new maid here. She's a bit slow. I'm giving her until tonight to finish dusting the entire castle or else she won't see another sunrise." It was almost comedic how dark her words were as you both stared out the window and gazed at the beautiful scenery. "Come on Alcina.", you stand up and place your hands on hers, trying to hold them despite the size difference. "Give the girl a break. It's a huge castle AND it's her first day.", you knew your words would probably change nothing. Alcina was rather cruel, but you looked past it. You tried your best to make the nervous maids comfortable whenever they arrive.

"We'll see how she does." She gives you one more kiss before leaving the room. You sit back down in your chair, enjoying the warmth of the sun for a little while longer. You lose track of time, minutes maybe even hours go by. Suddenly, there's a crash not far from the door. You jump and stand up, no longer comfortable after being startled. "What in the name of Mother Miranda?!", you leave the room and look down the hallway. The new maid stood there with a terrified look on her face. In front of her was one of the paintings Alcina had on her walls, now with a broken frame and a hole punctured. Your blood began to boil. It was a painting of you, her, and the girls all together. It was your favorite. "How in the hell did you manage to do that?!", you begin to stomp towards her. She cowers and struggles to find her words. "I-I-I was just dusting! It fell and I-I didn't mean t-", you cut her off. "How the fuck did you knock such a large painting over just by dusting?! DO YOU THINK YOU'RE ALLOWED TO MAKE SUCH STUPID MISTAKES HERE?!", you unravel. "I-I didn't mean to! I'm sorry!", she almost begins to weep. "SORRY ISN'T GONNA SAVE YOUR ASS!"

"MISS DIMITRESCU PLEASE HELP!", she cries out. You freeze, realizing that the lady herself is right behind you. You turn to face her. Her eyes are wide with shock. She has never seen you like this before and never even knew you had this type of side to you. She was impressed as much as she was terrified. "(Y/N)? Are you alright my love?" She had no idea what to do as your seething slowed down. "Why don't you go back to the room, yes? Settle down a little and deal with her later.", she places a hand on your back helps walk with you back to the room. Once you're there, she bends down to whisper in your ear. "I don't know where this side of you has been this whole time, but I am so amazed by you. And also a little frightened."

Donna

The Beneviento house was usually a calm place despite its creepy aura. You and Donna are both quiet and chill people. Never once have you fought or even raised your voices at each other. It was pleasant.

You had planned a nice dinner for the both of you. You wanted to try out a new recipe and surprise her, so you made your way to the kitchen to get started. "Okay, what first? I guess I'll need a pot.", you go rummaging through the kitchen and you find the pots stacked within each other inside one of the top cabinets. You groan and stand up on your toes, grazing the pots with your fingers. It didn't take much to cause them to tumble down, crashing on top of you with a loud sound that followed. "Aw shit.", you sighed and picked up the knocked over pots. A small but annoying pain began to throb in your head from where it made contact with a pot. What you didn't notice was you forgot to pick one of the pots up. It remained unnoticed. "It's fine.", you say to yourself as you maintain your composure. Next, a cutting board and knife. You turn around and begin to walk forward to find the cutting board, but you slam your toe into counter. You wince in pain and grab your foot. "SON OF A BITCH!", you yell.

You calm yourself, still wanting to have a pleasant meal with Donna. "Alright. Everything's fine." You step forward and kick the pot that you had forgotten to pick up. It caused your freshly kicked toe to ache even more. "OH COME ON! GOD FUCKING DAMMIT!", you scream and swear as you throw your arms up in pure rage and shock.

"...(Y/N)?", a gentle voice whispered from the doorway, causing you to whip your head in that direction. It was Donna. She looked absolutely horrified and almost looked like she could cry. "Is.. is everything... are you alright?", she worried. "Yes. I'm sorry. Just got a little pissed off.", you took a deep breath to calm yourself down, feeling bad for scaring the poor girl.

Moreau

You were sitting on the dock together, looking into the water as your feet swung back and forth above it. It was a sunny day and you two decided to spend it outside. Your hand slowly made its way over to his. His feet stopped swinging for a second as you entangled your fingers. "I don't know what I'd do without you, (Y/N)." his words were bitter sweet as a gentle smile formed from his lips. "Oh, Sal. You don't have to think like that. I'll always be here for you.", you kiss his cheek and continue to relax as you sway your legs.

"There it is! There's the beast!", a voice yelled from not so far away. You both look in the direction of the voice and see a few young village boys. Possibly between the ages of 13 and 16. Moreau had become some what of a scary story for the villagers. A tale that kids spread on school court yard and bring up during dares. But, you've never seen a kid brave enough to actually make it far enough into the reservoir to actually see Moreau. Now, there were about 3. All of them stood and pointed, shocked and terrified.

"Hey beast! Come get me!", one kid teases. You glare at the kids as a newfound rage begins to boil inside you. "Let's go back inside.", Moreau says before standing up from the doc. The sadness in his voice was heartbreaking. Suddenly, one of the children gathers the guts to pick up a rock and throw it as hard as he could. His aim was off, but not by much. It slammed into the wood near Moreau's feet, startling him. "Take that you devil!", he laughs. "THAT'S IT YOU LITTLE SHIT!", you begin sprinting in the direction of the immature brats. Two of them run from the direction they came from while the one who threw the rock was frozen in fear. You took the opportunity to grab him by the collar of his shirt. "Listen here you little waste of space. I'm gonna give you 3 seconds to turn around and run for your goddamn life. If you or any of your little snot-nosed friends come around here again, they'll be goddamn fish food. Do you understand?" The kid was too scared to speak and instead began to nod rapidly. You let him go and watched as he ran as fast as he could, screaming the whole way.

You walk back to the shack and find Moreau standing in the same place he was when you took off. His mouth was agape and he looked almost as scared as the kids. "You alright Sal? I made sure those little shits won't be coming around here anymore." "Yeah... I didn't know you could be so... scary", he says. "I'm sorry. But those kids were being cruel. I had to do something.", you say. "Well... it was awesome!", he smiled. "But also very scary!" You laugh which helps sooth him a little.

Heisenberg

"Screw driver.", is all Karl said with an outstretched palm. He was working on some type of mechanical heart for his experiments. He wanted you to lend a "helping hand" even though he could easily do it all by himself. He did this because he wanted to be around you, he was just too stubborn with too big of an ego to simply say it. So here you were, handing him every little tool he asks for.

"Do you want the big one or the little one?", you say with a hint of boredom in your tone. "Aw c'mon don't sound like that! Isn't this exciting? It's like you're working on it with me! Also, hand me the big one.", you do as he says and hand him the big screw driver. "I just don't get it. You literally have powers. You can easily do this by yourself and have been for so long. Why do you need me to help?" He pauses for a second and looks over towards you, his brow slightly furrowed. "I don't NEED you to help. I just thought it would be nice for you to help out. Plus, you're the one always bitching about me constantly working. Well, here you are! Helping me work! So, either suck it up or you can leave." His harshness had no real ill will in it. He was just confused and a bit too ignorant to consider his words. But, he was testing your patience. He continued to use the screwdriver until handing it to you without saying a word.

"Hand me a screw.", he demanded with his hand facing palm up again. "Which size?" "They're all the same sizes, dumbass." You feel your blood begin to boil. "They're different fucking sizes! This one is smaller than this one!", you hold up two screws that are obviously different sizes. This makes Karl angry. Not because you were right, but because you seemed upset over something that seemed so insignificant.

"If you came here just to yap in my ear, then I don't think I need your assistance.", he huffed. You put the selection of tools and supplies he was making you hold on the table he is working on and ball your fists. "You're the one who told me to do this in the first place!", you yell. "Yeah, because you won't stop bitching! Non-stop you're always compla-" you cut him off before he can finish. "SHUT UP!", you yell. The room goes silent. "YOU SAY I'M BITCHING? HAVE YOU HEARD YOURSELF? JESUS FUCKING CHRIST KARL YOU BITCH AND MOAN ALL THE TIME! I'M DONE TAKING SHIT FROM YOU!" He wanted to be angry, but he couldn't. He felt something much more overwhelming. Was he.. intimidated? He didn't move from his seat. All he could do was look up at you with a confused expression. What now? What is there to do? If he pushes you further, what would happen? He was actually too scared to find out.

You take a deep breath to calm down before speaking. "Now, if you want me to help with your shit, I'll stay as long as you keep your mouth shut. Can you possibly manage to do that?" He gulps nervously. "Yes ma'am."

[silverdelirium]

hi! can you do one where draco and the reader are married (don’t make them old please make them like the married rich pretty milf and dilf couple), and they have a daughter. anyway, draco is out because of work/something else (it’s up to u) and the reader is with their daughter and they get into a small fight and the daughter says something really bad/hurtful to the reader (her mother) and the reader like gets sad (make it bad so it can be dramatic😏) and when draco gets home he finds the reader like crying (smoking too bc a milf smoking is hot but if you don’t want to add it it’s fine) and yeah basically the rest is up to you :)) ily hope ur well and fine. <3

CIGARETTES & INSECURITIES | D.M

thank you hoe @selenesheart for helping me with the title ily

warnings: anxiety, lowkey panic attack, insecurities of being a bad mother, mean child, smoking, angst w a happy ending

———

draco’s hurried steps were heard echoing across the hallway as he rapidly made his way downstairs, cussing his boss out under his breath for calling him on a fucking Sunday. the same sunday he was about to spend basking in the love of his wife and child, all expectations now turned to mush.

“i’m sorry i have to go, my love. call me if you need anything, okay?” spoke draco, tone soft as he held your face in his hands, giving you one last sad smile before pressing a sweet kiss on your lips.

you gave him a feeble nod in response with a reassuring smile, watching him storm off in long strides, still swearing in hushed whispers and with a flick of his wand, he was gone.

you instantly took notice of how intense the atmosphere got around the manor- almost scary. deadly quiet with your four-year-old toddler still asleep and big curtains blocking any sunlight from coming in.

it almost caused goosebumps to rise on your arms as if the universe was already warning you of the day you were gonna have to deal with today.

maybe the first bad thing to happen today was being woken up by draco’s phone going off like crazy with calls of his boss and endless text messages of his colleagues.

it didn’t matter though, you had other things to worry about. your toddler was already walking down the stairs with a sleepy stare as she made her way to you, immediately taking notice of how there was no trace of draco, and looking around for any signs of her father.

“hi there” you greeted, giving her a sympathetic smile when she asked for draco, her small body already wrapped around your torso. a small sigh with a brief explanation of a work emergency was given to her. her sour mood amplifying a tenfold for every word that left your mouth.

she stayed quiet for a moment, and just as you started beaming at the thought of calming a daddy’s girl- she sobbed heavily in your ear, clinging hard to you but still screaming for draco.

a grimace found its way to your face along with a sorrowful expression as you shushed her down, tracing your fingers down her spine; a small trick you always did to relax her in days like this.

her sobs quieted down but she still cried silently in your shoulder, hot tears rolling down her face that had you questioning whether you should call your husband or not, the thought accompanying the insecurity of being a terrible mother who can barely keep her child tranquil.

after a few minutes of letting her pour all her emotions out, you made a path to the kitchen and sat her down on the barstool, wiping her tears away as she huffed in what seemed to be an angry expression.

“would you like some breakfast, baby?” you spoke, tone soft and slow as to not aggravate the situation.

“i want daddy”

“he’s- he’s not here right now” you tried to reason, watching as she took a deep breath but said nothing.

you turned around to head for the stove. but your ears caught a small murmur of “you’re the worst” coming from none other than your daughter.

a thunder-struck look adorned your face, blinking back the tears that found their way to your waterline.

ever since you found out you were pregnant, the anxiousness of being a not good enough mom had filled you in seconds, thinking of the worst scenarios possible throughout the pregnancy. draco was always there to ease your nerves a bit, yet, never quite pushing them away completely.

and jesus- did that simple three-word sentence stung painfully at your heart.

you stayed frozen in place for a few moments before taking a deep breath and quickly collecting yourself, continuing your errands around the kitchen as you made an effort to ignore the way your hands became clammy and heartstrings were pulled harshly in your chest.

the rest of the day went painfully slow, your daughter completely ignoring you and just curling up on the couch or playing in her room, always slamming the door in your face whenever you attempted to talk to her. your back also aching from having to do all house chores by yourself. every once in a while getting a text message from draco, rushed typos of “i love you” and “i’m gonna be there soon”.

——

the clock read 6:07 P.M and you held the cigarette to your lips with shaky fingers, tears blurring your vision as all the frustration from today came crashing down at once.

sobs rocked through your body as you inhaled the smoke and blew it out past your nostrils. warm, thick tears not coming to a halt even once.

your cries muffled every sound around you. not taking notice of draco who was now frantically searching for you, already finding your daughter safe and asleep on the couch. yet you were nowhere to be found.

it took one look at the cigarette package on the dining table for draco to locate you. he knew about your anxiety and how bad it got when triggered.

his heart ached and fists clenched at his side as he turned to his baby girl, snuggling her deeper into the thick fluffy blanket before making his way to the porch where you sat with a hand to your sternum, big clouds of smoke fogging the air around you.

“oh, baby” he sympathized, not giving you time to react as he enveloped you in a big hug, feeling the way your curled your fists on his shirt and sobbed quietly, taking ragged breaths every once in a while.

after a few minutes of taking shallow breaths, you pulled your head back from his chest, just enough to stare at his face, his bright grey eyes running down every feature you had, almost like he was studying it.

“what happened today?” he whispered, closing his eyes and connecting his forehead with yours.

you released a breath through your nose and lit off the cigarette on the small table next to you before explaining every small detail from today to draco, a few tears escaping at some points.

once you were done, draco removed his head from yours, pulling back and displaying both of his palms on your cheeks, observing your tear-stained face made him ache with sorrow.

“my love” he started “you are the world’s greatest mother to ever exist, a bad day with your child does not define your abilities as a mom. she loves you, we all do. you don’t know how fuzzy she gets when you’re not here.”

his words made a small smile crack through your lips, buzzing nerves slowly weighing down after every syllable he spoke.

“we would all be doomed if it wasn’t for you. every parent has a bad day, do not beat yourself up for it, it happens to the best of us.” he finalized, chest swelling with pride once he saw how you were full-on beaming, puckering your lips like a silent sign for a kiss which he gladly provided.

“i love you” you mumbled against his mouth.

“i love you more” he responded.

———

🏷: @spencervera @methblinds @marrymetheonott @adrianscumslut @wh0re4blaise @turn-to-page-394-please @fredshufflepuff @malfoysbiitch @saggyb1lls @selenesheart @metaraxia @dracoslittlesluttyprincess @dracomalfoys-wh0re @dlmmdl @fleursbabe @riddleswh0r3crux @lolooo22 @darlingmalfoy @littlemissnoname13 @i-love-scott-mccall @underappreciated-spoon-321 @steveharringtonswhore @dracosafety @dracoscum @riddleswh0rekrux @laceycallisto @slytherinbabess @lostaurorax @alexavolturisblog @s1ater @marauderswh0re1 @starless-starkov @black-rose-29 @tattooedkermit @purpleskymalfoy @emma67 @mypainistemporary @mauvea @teenwolfbitches28 @lissa-duh @paniicing @rav3nclawwhore @yagamigf

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[stargazer-balladeer]

Jealousy [Genshin Impact]

Characters Included: Aether, Albedo, Childe, Scaramouche, Xiao & Zhongli

Notes: Ngl,, this is a mess 🤣🤣 just like my mind- ;;w;; hope ya’ll like this! 

Reader’s Gender: Neutral

Warning: swearing in Scara’s part :(

Tagging: @genshin-obsessed

Aether isn’t a jealous-type at all, he trusts you that you won’t go behind his back. When he does get jealous, it’ll be either because he’s tired or someone interrupted his precious time with you or he just got back from his journey. But the one thing he hates the most is someone interrupting your date. 

His time with you is precious, every hour, every minute, every second, he cherishes them all. After all, he doesn’t know how much time he has, so he tries to make up every second in time with you. So if someone tries to interrupt his precious time with you, he’s pissed and pouty-

He’ll have a pout on his face as he glares at the person talking to you, wanting them to go away already. He doesn’t care if you reprimand him for scaring that person away, he doesn’t care if that person was important (like Jean or Diluc-), they're all the same in his eyes. When that person goes away, either scared or amused (Kaeya), Aether would immediately bring you into a hug as he peppers your neck with light kisses. 

If Aether sees that you are having fun with someone else, he can’t help but let his insecurity rise up. What if you left him for that person? What would he do with the shattered pieces of his heart? He’ll have a dark and sad look on his face, like a kicked puppy- he’ll walk away with his head hanging low. You better realize that Aether is gone or I swear I’ll--

Overall, his definition of jealousy is just being pissed by someone- 

“Tsk. That person really has the nerve to try to take away my time with you… I’m not jealous.”

Albedo, at first, would be confused at the sudden foreign feeling inside him when he sees you getting friendly with the other Knights. He doesn’t know what he’s feeling at that moment. Should he go there and drag you away? Why the sudden urge of kissing you in front of them? Why is his chest twisting painfully inside him? He really doesn’t understand-

He would consult Sucrose about it, and Sucrose concluded that he might be experiencing “Jealousy”. At first, he rejected the idea, saying it was a childish thing to experience. And that he has no time for that. But as the days pass, he soon realizes that Sucrose was indeed correct. 

Whenever someone would approach you, he would be staring (more like glaring) at them in the distance. His eyes would narrow if he sees that person casually touching you. But Albedo would only intervene if someone took it too far or if he sees that you’re uncomfortable. 

Albedo would never tell you that he’s jealous. It is kinda hard to see him jealous but the slightest change of his eyes and how his lips quirk into a dissatisfied frown made you realize that he’s jealous. Also, his mood sours if he’s jealous. He might ignore you for a while, don’t worry, he’s not mad! He’s just a bit pouty because he was just right there, why were you talking to that person?

Overall, won’t admit he’s jealous and might ignore you for a while.

“Why are you here? Shouldn’t you go back to that person? It seems like you two were having a pleasant conversation after all.”

Childe, similarly to Aether, is not a jealous type of person. Even if you try your best to make him jealous, it wouldn’t work. He can always see through your plan, so making him jealous purposely is always gonna fail. 

But here’s the thing. Childe is good at hiding his true emotions, the mask he has now was carefully carved and shaped by him. So he’s good at hiding his true motive, good at hiding his emotions, good at hiding his thoughts. This means that you wouldn’t know that he’s jealous. Though he’s still rarely jealous. He has a high pride towards himself that he wouldn’t get replaced easily. If there was ever a competition, he would happily compete with them for your heart- (competition and fights are what he lives for-)

He wouldn’t get jealous of you simply hanging out with someone, but if he sees that you’re having fun with the person. His jealousy meter is rising, he would hide in the shadows as he watches you and the person happily talking with each other. Once his jealousy meter reaches a certain meter, he would casually appear beside you and drag you away from that person while exclaiming that you two have something to do.

Like I said earlier, even if he was jealous, you can’t tell. So it’s 9 out of 10 chances that you were able to see his jealousy. If you tease him about it, he would just shut you up with a kiss- Also, there’s also this 50% chance that he’ll make out with you in front of the person. And he wouldn’t stop, he would just continue. You wouldn’t notice the person leaving, too caught up in your makeout session. When you two pull apart, he has a cocky smile on his face. 

Overall, secretly jealous but wouldn’t show it-

“There you are, sweetheart! I was searching for you everywhere! Come on! We have something to do! If you’ll excuse us, stranger, I’m going to have to steal away my (princess/prince)~”

It’s very obvious that he’s a jealous/possessive type. He would glare at anyone who dares to even go near you. No one can steal you away while he’s with you. Those who are stupidly brave (Childe-) will get zap by his Electro as Scaramouche drags you away while huffing. 

But he’s like this because he never has anyone to care for him before, your love is the only thing he has. Never has he experienced being loved before. He was despised by his fellow Harbingers and Fatui. He was hated by almost everyone he met. No one showed him any sort of affection unless they were simply using him for their own gain. You, who was undoubtedly naive and stupid to trust a Fatui Harbinger, manage to not only befriend him but make him fall in love with you. 

He gets jealous easily. Even if you two are the same gender, he’ll get jealous. He’ll immediately appear by your side and whisk you away, ignoring your complaints and the stare of the person. Sometimes, if someone is flirting with you, he’ll make out with you in front of them. Even though he doesn’t like kissing you in public, he will make this time an exception. The flustered look on the person’s face brings him such satisfaction-

Scaramouche would glare at that person who you’re talking to, doesn’t matter if you were the one who started the conversation, he would be seething with rage. How dare they talk to you?! Your attention and time should be spent on him! You might need to talk to him about his rather alarming behavior. After that, he’ll mellow down a bit. But that doesn’t stop his glares on that person. 

Overall,, even though he manages his anger issues, he’s still jealous if you spend time (even if it’s only a minute) on another person- 

“I told you to stop associating yourself with those low-life people, my beloved. You shouldn’t waste your breath on them……. Of course, I’m fucking jealous! You should’ve seen how they eyed you! I wanted to kill them on the spot for looking at you-” (chill scara- do you want some snickers-?) 

Xiao wouldn’t admit it but he’s jealous. He would rather die than ever admit that he’s jealous of you hanging out with your fellow mortals. Especially if you are on your way to meet him and a person starts to talk to you, somewhere, Xiao is glaring at the person and you are talking with a small pout on his face. He might not appear to you at all unless you decided to give him some Almond Tofu. 

Similar to Scaramouche, he never felt love before and doesn’t care much about it. He thought it was weak to love somebody, imagining giving everything up just for one person? Gross. But when Xiao met you for the first time, he thought time stopped. At that moment, he knew he would make you his. You manage to capture his heart just by appearing in front of him, so take full responsibility-

You can immediately tell if he’s jealous because he has a scary face on with an (adorable) pout. He’ll glare half-heartedly at you, grumbling that you should go back to whoever that was. Even though he acts like a baby at that moment, he was just insecure. You were a mortal, he was an Adepti. You can die any time while he lived for millennia now. Wouldn’t you prefer to date a mortal like yourself? One who will grow old with you, one who isn’t as cold-hearted as him? You might need to reassure him again-

Xiao trusts you, yes, but he doesn’t trust the mortals much. He actually prefers if you spend your time with someone like the Traveller, one he knows and trusts. He’s just being wary and cautious. Don’t worry. Even if someone decides to corner you in an alleyway or somewhere, Xiao would be there immediately, raging with fury-  

Overall, an overprotective, insecure baby that gets jealous if you don’t notice him-

“Did that mortal harm you? I saw how they grab you.. They should pay for their sins- how dare they hurt someone like you.” 

Zhongli is also not much of a jealous-type. He trusts you whole-heartedly and allows you to talk to anyone freely. He would only be alarmed if that person makes you uncomfortable or decides to harm you in any way. But other than that, he lets you be. As long as you return home in one piece.

But he would be annoyed if someone (its always Childe-) decides to interrupt your date. He prefers having alone time with you because he is constantly busy with work. He would not-so-subtly try to shoo away that person. But if you intervene and let them stay, he decides to let them be. But be prepared to have another date tomorrow to make-up the date ruined.

Even if he’s jealous, you couldn’t tell. He just his usual face on, with a rather malice smile on his face. If you look away for even a second, the person you’re talking to is already gone when you return your head. You blink, a bit offended at that person for suddenly leaving in the middle of the conversation. While Zhongli besides you just pat your head. (shh.. You don’t need to know that he scared off that person,, it’s our little secret-)

BUT! His jealousy will only show if you spend the entire day with another person, and completely ignoring him- when you return home, prepare for your punishment for spend your day with another person and not giving him his daily dose of kisses-

Overall, a rather calm guy that rarely gets jealous

“How rude. You’ve been ignoring me the whole day, and yet you spend your entire time with another. I’m your lover, am I not? And to add to the wound, you forgot to kiss me. Oh well, guess it’s time to get them now.”

[x] Main Page || [x] Mondstadt Page || [x] Liyue Page || [x] Fatui Harbingers Page

[sj0228]

astro notes for fun lol

HEY! this is my first astro observations post so don't be too hard on me lol unless u wanna then sure maybe i can improve them somehow BUTANYWAYZ this is for entertainment purposes only!! obviously these are just my own observations so if they don't resonate with you don't get offended or you're a big ol' 🅱️uss so here they are!! also SHOUTOUT TO MY AMAZING FRIENDS fyi i got sum help from them by asking them billions of questions to confirm my suspicions so uh hope that makes the observations more accurate LOL ANYWAYS HERE THEY ARE!! i'll probably make more in the future cuz i think they're super fun to make :D also if u couldnt tell uhm this isnt very professional im not professional BUT I TRIED TO MAKE IT PRETTY so pls dont be bothered lol im just doing this for fun i didnt even wanna make an astro page so yea </3pretty unreliable LMAOOO

👩🏻‍🦲 the house your mars is in is what pisses you off the most!! (eg. 1st - people assuming things about you, 5th - people beating around the bush, 7th - things that disrupt the harmony of your environment, 9th - the need to hold back your opinions because others get bothered by them being "offensive")

👩🏻‍🦲 cancers are true ambiverts and i've truly never ever seen a cancer who wouldn't be both introverted and extroverted at times. they are always either social introverts or quiet extroverts lol. or both!! (somehow 0_0) they enjoy people's attention, whether it's wanting to be noticed or appreciated or generally cared for, and they need their alone time. they tend to be very productive at those times, too.

👩🏻‍🦲 ok i have a lot of notes for cancers so it's gonna be a lot lmao sorry anyways!! i've also noticed they LOVEEE breaking loose every once in a while, if not every time they're given the opportunity! thing is, it's usually only if someone else is there to convince them or do it with them. they don't like taking risks alone! they are very impressed and fond of the 'wild child' persona people because they bring out the cancer's wild side!

👩🏻‍🦲 libra moons are absolutely loved by people, it's so crazy! like, no matter what they do they always have attention on them. this can manifest badly if the moon person is actually pretty horrible, things they do tend to be overlooked and others move on pretty quickly from their mistakes, letting them do whatever they want. i wanted to give an example but uh,,,,, i shall.. refrain😳

👩🏻‍🦲 libra suns with water moons are so scary when they're angry..

👩🏻‍🦲 cancer moon is what i deem as the zodiac sign cute-ifyer lol. literally any "tough" sign like capricorn, scorpio or aquarius becomes a super cute goofball with this moon. WEIRDEST THING EVER THOUGH is that it doesn't work for cancer suns?! like if a cancer sun has a cancer moon this just makes the person very confusing but very funny. they can brighten anybody's day without trying!

👩🏻‍🦲 okay uh this isn't an astro note as much as it is me being a phucken simp but uh..... I HAVE AN UNDYING LOVE FOR ARIES SUNS I WILL MARRY EVERY EACHAND ONE OF YOU ISTG. ARIES SUNS ARE THE NICEST AND FUNNIEST PEOPEL I'VE EVER SEEN YOU HAVE THE BEST HUMOR EVER AND YOU'RE SO KIND TO EVERYBODY YOU'RE SO KIND I LOVE YOU YOU'RE TOO GOOD FOR THIS PLANET I WANT TO HUG YOU FOREVER okay jbshxhjn but fr aries are the best people ever?!?!?!?!?!?! pls

👩🏻‍🦲 okay JUST SO THIS WHOLE ARIES MENTION ISN'T JUST A POINTLESS LOVE CONFESSION - i've noticed a lot of ♥aries♥ people use the laughing crying face emojis (😂,🤣) unironically and it's honestly.....the best thing ever

👩🏻‍🦲 taurus suns do this sometimes as well

👩🏻‍🦲 THE MOST UNHEALTHY PERCEPTIONS OF ZODIAC SIGNS ARE PUT ON FIRE SIGNS, NOT THE WATER SIGNS AND THIS IS COMING FROM A PISCES!!!!!!1 every stereotype is always showing fire signs as those sunshine of the group people, the baddies, and the ones with the biggest 'idgaf' attitude. and while this can totally be true sometimes, most of the time it's super different! sad fire signs break my heart pls i just wanna hug you guys T-T they have it the hardest because unlike water signs who are already expected to be emotional, they often repress their emotions for the sake of others and because of the fear of betrayal or judgement, or just generally the idea of "it's better to have fake friends than to have zero friends". YOU GUYS PLEASE. cut these people off from your life you deserve soo much better i know it can be super hard to open up for you u just need a hug omg EVERYONE PLEASE CHECK UP ON YOUR FIRE SIGN FRIENDS ASK THEM ABOUT THEIR DAY N STUFF THEY WILL APPRECIATE YOU CARING FOR THEM! pls stay best and take care sweethearts ily!!!

👩🏻‍🦲 i've also noticed that some of the signs tend to show their sadness through anger - this is not just astrology though so if your friend has been jumpy lately please just check on them they are probably going thru sth😳 anyways the signs i mostly saw this in are pisces, aries and libra.

👩🏻‍🦲 cancers with feminine moons (earth and water) tend to be pretty introspective. they often think they're the ones being mistreated, and while this of course might be true, in reality it usually goes a lonnng way back lol. they often pay very little attention to others!! (masculine moon sign cancers (fire and air) can often be too focused on others more than themselves) this can be good because they don't snoop in other people's business but oh my god, guys, please pay attention to your friends, too! this WILL lead to lost friendships because, let's be real, nobody wants a one-sided friendship with someone who only cares about themselves! i don't want to target anybody here but this is just a pattern i've noticed wayyyy too often, so you might want to look into it and if you think this is you all you need is just to enlargen your perspective and it will all be okay. but please, PLEASE. think about your friends

👩🏻‍🦲 i needed to get this^ out because people often put this on leo placements but tbh i notice that leo placements are THE MOST generous of the entire zodiac and they always think of others first and that's what really makes them so popular. they very rarely are as egocentric as everybody says, they're just really loving and that makes them very lovable!

👩🏻‍🦲 scorpio risings are the prettiest people i've ever seen. not even kidding bruh i could stare at them for EVER their eyes are absolutely gorgeous and their mannerisms are just perfect pls marry me

👩🏻‍🦲 gemini and taurus placements make an individual soooo chill to the point where it often makes them lazy and a biig procrastinator lol. tho i love how they make light of it by using their amazing humor!

👩🏻‍🦲 you most definitely have your IC be one of your family members' sun sign or one of their personal planets. i have a taurus ic and my sister is a taurus sun!

👩🏻‍🦲 sagittarius suns are the best huggers cause THEY REALLY NEED A HUG SO GO HUG THEM RIGHT NOW. pls guys why r u so sad..

👩🏻‍🦲 scorpio mars aren't even as sexual as everybody says tbh. but they definitely do have some interesting.....interests ;)

👩🏻‍🦲 pluto aspects to personal planets are very prominent, but very hidden. if you have them, most likely you will be the only person to know about this side of you and it can be pretty dark..

👩🏻‍🦲 planets conjunct your sun will be the people you attract most in your life (venus conjunct sun - taurus and libra, jupiter - sagittarius and pisces, mars - aries and scorpio EVERYWHERE)

👩🏻‍🦲 your moon sign will be the sun sign of most of your friends

👩🏻‍🦲 if you don't quite relate to your ascendant, look at the sign you have in your 3rd house and at your mercury sign. this is how you communicate, convey your ideas etc. and will often be a major factor in people's first impressions of you :)

👩🏻‍🦲 lilith aspecting your sun may mean there's a side of you nobody knows.. 👁👁 you're also probably very convincing and people can be very drawn to you and they can't explain why. this also goes for lilith in 7th, especially in girls!

👩🏻‍🦲 you and your friends probably have each other's sun signs as your personal planets!!

👩🏻‍🦲 the kindest person you know is probably either a virgo or an aries.. and the meanest person you know is also probably a virgo or aries LOL

👩🏻‍🦲 capricorn suns & risings are THE hardest to read!! if they don't say what they mean people will just assume and they're never going to be right it's wild 👩🏻‍🦲 also capricorns definitely have the most dad energy, while sagittariuses are more like actual dads jdbshxcvb

OKAY THAT'S ALL!!!! im sure i have more but its 2 am i have school tomorrow or actually its today now so bye uh anyways there will most likely be more so if u liked these stay tuned!! oh and let me know if they were true witchu :o thats it love u stay awesome and super cool i love u byebye!!

[inupibaldspot]

Letters and Fights

Request by : @aliendoggo

Paring : Baji x Female Reader.

Synopsis: You kick Baji and then help him write a letter to make up for it

Baji has had enough! He huffed as he walked along a path which led him to a quiet place a bit out of school campus which had an area covered with bushes and trees. I'll write my letter here.

Chifuyu always helped Baji when he wrote his letters but yesterday the former ended up laughing at the way Baji made an error on his letter which was so not cool of him. Baji thought.

Now Baji was walking to this quiet area where he was sure not many people would come and interrupt him.

So he pulled out his pen placing a paper on top of a book and started writing.

Deer Kazutora,

Recently I have been studying queet a lot, I even brought glasses.

Mickey and Draken said people who wear glasses are more intilijent.

Baji was going to continue more when-. "Meow~" His ears perked at the tiny sound and he started looking around.From the corner of his eyes, he saw movement in the bushes so he started making his way.

A small kitten popped its head out and looked at him,meowing. Baji laughed to himself making him extend his hand and gently starts petting it. "Hey there."

The kitten leaned into his touching making Baji melt on the spot. Upon hearing the kitten still meowing, he smiled. "I'll bring you some food later- URK!"

Baji was sent flying. He cursed as he pulled himself up. That kick was probably as strong as Mikey's. He thought as spit out the blood he had formed in his mouth.

"You're the one who did that to Mayo aren't you?" The person started pointing at him.

"The hell?" Baji whispered in confusion as to why a girl popped out of blue,kicked him several feet away and now was shouting at him. Plus why is this girl so strong?!

"I can't believe people like you exist?! What did the Mayo even do to you?" The girl shook her head.

Baji snapped. "Who the hell are you and Who the hell is Mayo? I was just writing a letter when you suddenly came here and kicked the shit outta me!"

The person's expression flattered. "You're not the one... Ehh?" The person trailed her eyes to indeed see some stationaries lying around.

The girl suddenly did a deep bow. "I'm sorry! Recently someone has been harassing the kitten over there and even taped her mouth so that she couldn't eat." They explained. "I came up here and saw you near the kitten and thought it was you who did those."

"My name is Y/N and the kitten over there is Mayo..." You introduced yourself.

"My name is Baji Keisuke." Baji sighed, his anger dissipating. I mean... They were just looking after the cat.

"By the way I just peaked into your letter and..." You nervously played with your hand. "You have a lot of spelling errors over there."

"Wait really?" Baji approached you and picked up the letter as he leaned towards you. "Which part?"

You picked up the pen which was on the ground and pointed at the errors. "Here and here... this part too."

You suddenly beamed,clapping your hands together in realization. "How about I help you proof read your letter as a way of apologizing for the kick earlier?"

Baji beamed at the suggestion. "You will? Thanks!"

This meeting continued even after Baji finished writing his letter. Y/N said she'll always be there to help him with his studies so it became a sort of regular meeting between Y/N, Baji and Mayo.

When Baji would write his letters, you will be playing with Mayo but when you started proof reading Baji would be the one playing with Mayo instead. Baji enjoyed these moments a lot.

The way you would patiently explain where he made mistakes, the way you scrunched your nose figuring out his handwriting, the way you made baby voices when talking to Mayo. All of these made Baji feel happy? Relaxed? Content? He wondered what word could be used to describe what he was feeling.

Baji walked to their usual spot but instead of you,he saw a group of boy. There were six students and from their uniforms he could guess that they were High School Students.

A sharp cry of a cat was heard followed by laughters. On a closer look one of the boys had Mayo held whereas the poor kitten was obviously struggling. Your words on how Mayo had tape stuck on her mouth flashed into his brain.

"Damn,this cat won't stop struggling." One of the boys said. "Maybe we should tape it's limbs this time."

Suddenly a large impact was felt on his face making him drop the kitten. "What the hell?!"

"What were you doing with Mayo?!"

Baji went into crazy mode as he jumped on the boy and punching him until he passed out. The remaining boys also joins the fight.

Don't get me wrong. Baji is strong but right now he was heavily outnumbered and his opponents were high school students. They were physically bigger putting Baji in a disadvantage since Baji was only in middle school.

"Shit..." Baji huffed as his vision start to blur. He managed to beat two more of the high schooler but then three more still remained. One of him hit Baji hard making him fall onto the ground.

"You need some help?" Why the hell was he seeing you face? Just when Baji was about to pass out your face suddenly came into view.

"Go away, little girl~" The high school said in a mocking tone. Baji confirmed that you were indeed here and that he wasn't imagining anything.

"Guess you're the guys who were tormenting Mayo..."

"Mayo? Who the hell is Mayo-"

Before the boy could complete his sentence, you jumped at him,punching his face in. Before others could react you quickly turned to the other dude and kicked him,making him stumble.

The last high schooler ,taking advantage that your back was facing him was about to punch you when a suddenly blow was dealt. You turned to see a smirking Baji. "Y/N,are you a gorilla or something? Why are you so strong?"

You gasped at him. "Why would you ever call a girl gorilla?" You asked as you started punching a guy who was bout to stand up making Baji laugh loudly.

Both you and Baji huffed as you sat side by side after you finally beat the shit out of high schoolers. You turned to look at Baji. “Gonna write a letter to Kazutora-san again?”

Baji smirked and nodded. “I’m going to write everything that’s happening around so that when he comes back he wouldn’t need to try and catch up. It’ll be as if he never left in the first place!”

You smiled as you started rubbing you hand on Mayo’s head. “You’re a nice friend, Baji...”

After that both you and Baji did your usual thing.

Dear Kazutora,

I’ve made a new friend. Her name is Y/N.

And get this! She is super strong. Just now we beat the shit out of six HIGH SCHOOLERS.

I can’t wait to introduce her to you when you come back.

Y/N loves animals a lot too. Right now she is taking care of a stray cat but then she is sad since she can’t take the cat home because her mother doesn’t like them.

She is very fun to be with and smiles a lot!

Baji left a weight on his shoulder to see that you had fallen asleep on his shoulder. Mayo on your lap had fallen asleep too. Your lips were slightly open making you look adorable.

Right now she is totally passed out. Hopefully she doesn’t drool on my shoulder. Do you think she would get angry if I drew a beard on her?

Her mouth is slightly open and I think she looks cute.

Although she fights scary, Y/N is quite pretty. When ever she smiles, she closes her eyes making her look kinda adorable-

“Are you done, Baji?”

Baji flinched as he quickly stood up making you almost fall since your support stood up. “What the hell? Why did you get you so suddenly?!” You complained.

Baji quickly crumbled the paper he had written on and laughed nervously looking at you. “I did a self check and found too many errors. So I’m going to write it again.”

You noticed that his ears were rather red.

.....

“Hanaemiya Kazutora. A letter arrived for you...”

Dear Kazutora,

I made a new friend. Her name is Y/N.

She fights like a gorilla and looks like one as well. Living up to that nickname ,she is quite strong.

#GirlBoss

With love,

Baji Keisuke.

Kazutora tilted his head,confused as to why his friend had suddenly written about a girl and keeps calling her a gorilla.