#when they’re not yet ready because of no child left behind

[summerhighlandfalls]

Anyway seriously fuck the traditional American education model and fuck gifted and talented

[munsonfamilyband]

Slick Sunday post for @lexirosewrites !! I decided to just post it like this since this is probably going to be long. I do promise it has christmas in it but there’s a build up to that. Also very minor TW for child abuse. It’s less than a sentence but still. And also, this is canon up till s4, I don’t really know how different it is, the important thing is that Chrissy lived and Eddie didn’t get eaten as much as he does in canon.

—————

It starts in 1987. It’s late November, Steve has unofficially taken over his house since he hasn’t spoken to his parents in so long he doesn’t even remember. Eddie and Robin are over helping him decorate their tree. They’re all wearing ugly sweaters and pajamas. Steve and Eddie had just started officially courting, while Robin and Chrissy were still dancing around each other. She was in the middle of lamenting her latest failed attempt to ask her out when the front door opens and the Harringtons enter. A fight breaks out pretty quickly and it culminates in a few smashed ornaments, Steve getting slapped, Eddie being literally sat on by Robin to keep him calm, and Steve being told his things needed to be gone by the next day. He’s told that his behavior is not that of a Harrington.

And then they’re gone.

Eddie forces Robin off of him so he can hold Steve, and she goes to call Hopper. He and Steve had been close before Starcourt and since he came back last year they’re reconnected. (Steve calls him dad behind his back, he’s too scared to say it to Hop’s face yet.)

Hop shows up a few minutes later, only to be followed by one very angry Claudia Henderson. She explains that El had called Dustin on the walkie about the phone call she overheard and Claudia left right away.

They both start helping him pack once they know he’s okay and they all go to Hop’s cabin for dinner. While they’re eating Steve casually mentions that he wants to change his name. What he thought would be a casual comment with little fanfare resulted in Claudia baring her teeth at Hop as they argued over who got to bring Steve into their family officially. It would be scarier if Steve wasn’t ready to cry from how loved it makes him feel. He does eventually have to burst their bubble and tell them he wants to be a Buckley. This does get Hop and Claudia to calm down but it also gets Steve tackled off his chair by Robin in a hug.

Fast forward, it’s now the mid 90s. Chrissy and Robin live in the brownstone next to Eddie and Steve in Chicago. Steve and Eddie got married two years ago and earlier that fall they had learned Steve was pregnant. They had so far only told Robin and Chrissy, but that was because Steve was at home while Eddie was at work and he begged Robin to come with him to buy tests. Both Eddie and Steve knew it was time to tell everyone else, since he had just finished the first trimester and with christmas coming up they decided to go with the most cliche announcement possible.

The four of them go back to Hawkins for the holidays. Robin and Chrissy are staying at the Buckley’s and Eddie and Steve are staying at Hop’s cabin.

The first person they tell is Wayne. They have dinner with him for christmas eve and then over dessert exchange presents. Eddie gets a new set of steel toed boots and Steve gets a new coat. Then they hand Wayne his gift and Eddie grabs their camcorder to record his reaction. Inside is a new baseball hat placed upside down with something balled up inside it. Wayne takes the cloth out and flips the hat around, freezing as he reads it, then quickly dropping it and picking up what is now clearly a onesie. In bold letters the onesie says ‘Grandpa’s Fishin’ Buddy’. The hat says ‘Grandpa is my name, Fishing is my game’. Wayne, still gripping the onesie in his hands looks up at them with wet eyes.

“Is this… I’m gonna be a grandpa?”

Eddie can’t stop smiling behind the camera and he turns it slightly to catch Steve as he smiles at Wayne, giving little jazz hands as he says, “surprise.”

Eddie just barely pans back to Wayne to catch him standing up to pull Steve into a hug.

“I’m so happy for you two. Ed, you better put that thing down and get in here.”

———

The next people they tell are the Henderson’s. While Dustin will also be at Hop’s that night, Steve had wanted to be able to see his mom for christmas so for years they had been doing brunch at the Henderson’s before the three guys go to Hop’s and Claudia goes to get some extra hours working at the hospital.

They show up right on time with their gifts and enjoy breakfast before it’s present time. Dustin gets the new Dungeons and Dragons book that had just come out and a new set of dice that looked like the night sky. Steve gets a new cookbook and a scarf. Eddie gets a scarf as well as a new toolbox for work. Then Steve hands over the gift bag to Claudia, but before she opens it he turns to Dustin while Eddie gets the camcorder again.

“Dustin, I need you to promise me, right now, that what you see right now will not be told to anyone today. Got it?”

Dustin rolls his eyes as he responds, “Dude, it’s just a gift-“

“Dustin. Promise me,” Steve interjects.

After they stare at each other for another 30 seconds Dustin gives a dramatic sigh and promises. With that done Steve gives Claudia the okay to open her gift. She takes out the tissue paper and pulls a folded up sweatshirt and a folded canvas bag out. The bag is unfolded first and Claudia gasps, quickly unfolding the sweater and then dropping them both to rush over to hug Steve.

“Oh, I’m so happy for you! My baby!” Claudia is crying as she and Steve hold each other tight, Steve laughing with pure joy. Eddie catches Dustin standing up out of the corner of his eye and refocuses the camera on him, following him as he goes over and picks up the items his mom dropped. The bag says ‘Grandma’s Magic Bag’ and the sweatshirt says ‘World’s Best Grandma’. Dustin stares at them and then he’s shouting.

“You guys are having a pup?!”

Eddie just grins at him over the camera as he asks, “You ready to be Uncle Dustin?” Eddie then barely keeps the camera from breaking as Dustin rushes him in a hug.

———-

Their final present is that evening at Hop’s. Steve is drinking hot cider and curled into Eddie’s side on the couch, Robin right next to him with a hand on his ankle, Chrissy on her other side laughing as Max shares a story about college. Steve looks around the room and sees Dustin already staring at him, practically vibrating in his seat. It’s clear that he’s doing his best to not spill the beans so Steve huffs a laugh and claps to get everyone’s attention.

“Alright, present time?”

The next minute or so is a rush of movement as everyone finds a spot and grabs their gifts, Steve holding tight to his gift for Hop. Eddie had El help him hide the camera earlier so she can turn it on without giving anything away.

Presents are passed around and opened. Max gave Steve a new poster for his classroom, and Robin got him the fancy desk organizer set he had been looking at for months. Mike got Eddie new patches for his work coveralls and Will gave them a beautiful painted version of their wedding photo. (Steve does tear up over it but tries to cover up as best he can, stupid pup hormones).

Then Steve stands and hands Hop his bag, giving El a wink as he walks past her and he sees her squint her eyes for a breath before giving him a wink back. Steve settles back in to Eddie’s side and gives Hop the go ahead. He pulls out what is clearly a mug wrapped in tissue paper with a hat stuffed into it. Hop takes the hat out first and looks at it, his face unreadable, before he sets it down with the words hidden. He quickly takes off the tissue paper and reads the mug. His face is still blank but everyone can see his eyes filling with tears as he makes eye contact with Steve.

Eddie gives Steve a little nudge and that’s all it takes for him to get up and go hug his dad, being wrapped up in his arms as Hop cries. After a beat where it’s still silent Hop speaks, looking over at Eddie. “Years ago, I thought I would never get to be a grandpa.” Steve just hugs him tighter and the room around them erupts as everyone starts screaming. Eddie gets dog piled by the boys, excluding Dustin who has collapsed on the floor from the relief of not having to hide that anymore. Steve feels two people wrap around him from behind and glancing at their arms he sees that it’s El and Max, both hugging him. When everyone has calmed more Steve goes back to sit with Eddie, who can now place his hand on Steve’s stomach. Hop sits down and finally shows everyone his gifts. The mug has a sheriff’s badge and it says ‘Chief Gramps’ and the hat says ‘Professional Grandpop’. Hop puts it on his head that night and refuses to take it off.

———————

Et viola. Also, this is Wayne’s hat because I love it so much:

[rinhaler]

MY BOYFRIEND'S BACK, AND HE'S COOLER THAN EVER!

CHAPTER SUMMARY : Bags are packed, parents are disappointed, and Chigiri has arrived to ride up to the Itoshi family cabin together !

ex-fiancé!rin x f!reader

WARNINGS : 18+, alcohol mention.

WORDS : 4k

notes : me vs wanting to fuck almost everyone in the cabin 😩

LAST CHAPTER ┊ MASTERLIST ┊ NEXT CHAPTER

“Ready to go?” Chigiri asks, coming inside to assess the situation. He looks at your enormous suitcase and several travel bags before looking back at you with a quirked brow. You look away from him quickly, pretending something on your phone has caught your attention. “You know we’re only going for a week, right?”

“I want to be prepared!”

“It’s crazy,” he laughs, “because I know that somehow you’re gonna come home with more things than you left with.”

“Not true! Your birthday presents are in here!” you smile, shaking the large gift bag in your hand. He tries to take it from you to peak at what’s inside, but you move it out of his reach.

He pouts.

You pout harder.

“Fine, I’ll carry the heavy suitcase. Even though it’s my birthday week.”

“Thank you Chigs~!”

“Don’t call me that~!” he repeats in your sing-song voice.

You laugh, picking up another bag and carrying it to the car. You load them into the back before rushing into your house again and getting the last few bags. He takes them for you, allowing you to lock the door. If you’d had more warning, you definitely would have gotten a house sitter. But you’re trying not to worry about that, you just want to get on the road and leave all of your worries behind.

Worries, including your family. The family who are less than impressed that you’re abandoning them to spend a boozy week with friends instead of them. You don’t care, though. You delivered their gifts and wished them well.

It’s stupid, really, that they’re so frustrated that you won’t be spending time with them. You can’t stomach spending time with your dad and his new girlfriend. He knows you can’t control your face and you say the first thing that comes to your mind.

You inherited that from him.

Your mother however, was devastated when you told her. You figured she’d be okay since she has a larger family to spend the holidays with. But you’re her only child, you suppose you are being a little selfish.

It’s something you have to do though, you feel. You’re not over Rin and you don’t want to spend Christmas with family grieving what should have been you and him spending the day together. This way, you get to actually have fun. It’s not forced or superficial to keep up appearances for your relatives.

No one is going to expect anything of you at the cabin.

“I’m proud of you,” Chigiri smiles, looking at you briefly before focusing back on the road. You scoff, turning the radio up in the car, Mariah Carey blasting through the speakers. You both groan before he hands you the aux cord. “Not in a cringe way. I just mean, I know you’re a people pleaser. So I’m impressed that you put yourself over your parents.”

“Ugh, they were both so disappointed in me. I spent thousands on presents for them both. I even got some toys for my stepdad’s ratty step-kids. What more can I do?”

“God they are ratty.”

“They’re giving Damien from The Omen.” you tell him, both of you laughing loudly as one of your playlists plays softly through the speaker. You turn it up a little, both of you whooping as you hear Boss Bitch by Doja Cat play. “I know I was shitting myself when Sae texted, but I’m so glad we’re doing this.”

“Me too, I was dreading spending my birthday with your miserable ass.” he chuckles and you slap his arm lightly. “Wait! I know you’re still down about Rin, so, this will be a fun distraction. Plus I bet you end up hooking up with one of Sae’s friends, you haven’t had your rebound yet.”

“I am not doing another footballer, I can’t.” you shake your head.

You both laugh lightly and carry on chatting about the events to come. It’s like a weeklong party, essentially. And ever since you’ve known Chigiri, you’ve both loved a party. But it’s never actually the party itself.

The days before a party are always the best. Whether you’re hosting or attending, it’s always exciting. A theme is always ideal but not essential. Either way, you’ll spend weeks talking about it. Who’s going? What will you wear? What are you gonna drink?

You go on numerous shopping trips and buy endless amounts of clothes until you find the perfect outfit. Only to wear it that night and never again. But it’s worth it, every time. Hearing people compliment how gorgeous you look never gets old.

No one’s words meant more to you than Rin’s, though. The way he’d rest his hand in the small of your back while showing you off made you feel like a princess. He’d whisper sweet nothings about how you’re the most beautiful girl he’s ever seen and the things he wanted to do to you when you got home. It made your legs weak and your face flush with heat. And yet, he was always so calm. So cool. He liked to rile you up and pay you no mind as you look up at him expectantly. Acting as if he hadn’t said something so salacious and lewd while chatting with guests.

It drove you wild.

But, truthfully, where your best friend is concerned, your favourite part of a party is the morning after. If he spent the night at your place, especially. You’d wait for him to message you to let you know he’s awake and leave Rin’s side while he was snoring softly. Hyoma can’t handle his drink, and you’re no better. You’d crawl into bed with him and burrow under the duvet after handing him some water and painkillers.

Hungover or not, though, you loved gossiping with him. You’d trade stories about what happened throughout the night and things you heard. It made your day; it made the hangover worth it.

And now, you’re driving towards a week’s worth of that.

You groan as the song changes from Doja Cat to Lust for Life by Lana Del Rey.

“Nope!” he objects, “What kind of psychopath has Doja and Lana on the same playlist?” Chigiri asks, skipping the song. You throw your head back against the headrest, sighing as you think about Rin, again.

The album featuring the eponymous song is one of the first gifts Rin gave you. In vinyl form, of course, along with a pink record player. You had a record player already, but you told him a few times that you’d always wanted a pink one. It was a birthday gift, you remember crying so much as you unwrapped it.

“And I thought we could listen to this together.” you reminisce on him telling you as he handed the album to you. You told him you’d never listened to it before when you were going through her discography. It was a throwaway comment you didn’t think he’d even remember.

You cried listening to the self-titled song, wrapped up in his arms as he held you close. Truthfully, you’ve never felt so loved. And unfortunately, you don’t think you will again. You told him, repeatedly, how in love with him you were.

He couldn’t keep his hands off you after that.

“I need to make a new playlist.” you sigh, Chigiri nods, agreeing. “You’re right, Doja and Lana on the same playlist is psycho behaviour.”

“And you’re only just realising this?” he laughs again.

“I bet he’s got a new girlfriend now. Girls always threw themselves at him, even when we were together.” you tell him. “Oh my God, I miss him. I miss him so much I feel sick. I can’t do this.”

“Shut up.” he tells you, sternly, “I haven’t seen anything on his socials about a girlfriend, but that’s none of your business anymore anyway.”

“You’re still on his socials?”

“… anyway…”

“You know how private he is, Hyoma. If he’s seeing someone he wouldn’t post about her.”

“He posted you.” he reminds you, and you shrug defeatedly. “Besides, you broke up with him. You ended things and you’re still heartbroken. Imagine how depressed he probably is. He’s a workaholic, too. He’s probably distracting himself with work, not girls.”

Hyoma always knows what to say. Deep down, you knew that. But you never would have thought about it until he said. It was a miracle that he even asked you out, after all. His friends never failed to tell you how surprised they were. He’s too focused on football to bother with girls.

But you… you were different.

“You’re self-sabotaging, idiot.” Chigiri tells you. “We’ll get there, we’ll have fun, and you won’t think about Rin at all. I’m banning Rin talk for the rest of the week.”

“Fine fine fine.” you relent, shaking your body in an attempt to dispel any further thoughts of your ex. Though, to be honest, Sae might make it hard to not think about or discuss him. He’s his brother, after all. You can’t expect him to not talk about his little brother. And you certainly can’t ask him not to. “You’re gonna love the cabin. It’s huge. And there’s a lake we can ice skate on.”

“Perfect, can’t wait.”

There are several cars parked outside as you pull up. Chigiri parks, but is frozen in place as he looks at the cabin. It’s clear that the place is not what he expected. You end up leaving him alone to process his thoughts as he drinks it in. It’s the closest he’ll get to feeling like a celebrity, he suspects.

He follows you out, rushing to help you lift your suitcase as you struggle under the weight of it. You smile, gratefully, as he drags it towards the cabin. You decide to pick up his much smaller suitcase as well as all of your other bags. It isn’t hard to keep up with him as he struggles to pull your luggage through the snow.

“This isn’t a cabin. I was expecting a log shack with a few amenities. This is a mansion.” Chigiri tells you as you walk by his side. You giggle, agreeing, you felt exactly the same way the first time you came here with Rin.

You walk up the stairs ahead of him and knock on the door, starting to shiver as the biting winter air begins to attack you.

Chigiri manages to get your suitcase to the top of the stairs before anyone even knows you’ve knocked. He’s cold, tired, and impatient, and decides to ring the doorbell. You can both hear music playing inside.

It gets louder once the door swings open, and you see a familiar face.

“Oh hey, are you the little sister?” Oliver asks, forgetting that you’ve met before. You assume that’s how Sae has been referring to you as when talking to his friends, so, you nod. He smiles at Chigiri and takes your heavy suitcase from him, lifting it with ease as he welcomes you in. “They’re all in the lounge, grab yourselves a drink from the kitchen.” he tells you, winking as he sets down your case with all of the others at the bottom of the stairs.

There’s a lot of luggage, though the amount seems to double when you and Chigiri put the rest of yours down. You aren’t sure how many people must be here, but the nerves are setting in.

“She’s cute!” you hear Oliver tell the group as he goes into the lounge, it’s quiet, but you hear it clearly.

“You’ve met her before, idiot.” you hear Sae tell him, his voice getting closer to you as he comes to greet you. “Hey you.” he smiles, hugging you and placing a soft kiss on your cheek. You hug him back, feeling surprisingly calmer as you allow yourself to melt into his embrace.

You aren’t sure why, but you were worried he’d be weird with you when he saw you in person. This is only the second time you’ve seen him since you and Rin split, after all. The first was a coffee date to explain your side of things face to face. You’re happy you decided to keep in contact with Sae, he’s been so sweet and supportive through it all.

So, really, you aren’t sure why you expected him to be off with you.

Especially since he invited you here.

“Nice to meet you, man.” Sae smiles at Chigiri, holding his hand out to shake, which he does. “Your birthday is on the 23rd, yeah? We’ll plan something fun.”

“Being here is fun enough, don’t worry.” Hyoma responds, looking around. “This isn’t a cabin, by the way.” he laughs.

Sae laughs too, walking back towards the lounge. “Come meet everyone.” he insists. You and Chigiri look at each other, but follow.

You’re the only girl here, by the looks of things. You aren’t sure if that’ll change or not though. Maybe they all have partners who are arriving together later. You’re a little surprised by the headcount, you were expecting more. Including Sae, there’s only four of them sitting around the fire, drinking together.

“Apparently we’ve met before?” Oliver’s brows knot in contemplation, and you nod. “Sorry, sweetheart. Normally I don’t forget a pretty face.”

“Yeah ya do, bullshitter.” Tabito snickers, looking up at you from his seat on the floor. You’ve never met Karasu, but you’ve heard a lot about him. Mostly from Rin about when they used to play together. And you may or may not have stalked his socials before, so you’re familiar with his face. “Nice to meet’cha, heard a lot about you.”

“Likewise.” you smile.

“Do you smoke?” you hear another voice speak as you get further into the room. Your eyes lie on Eita Otoya as he pulls a blunt from behind his ear, and you shake your head. You’re surprised to see them letting loose like this, though you suppose they mustn’t get the chance to often.

Rin found it hard to relax and unwind. He’s always been so career focused, never wanting to do anything to harm his reputation. And you understand that, you do. You’re the same, really. You have an image to maintain, people seem to think being a model is just turning up and looking pretty. But you take it seriously, like Rin.

Though he doesn’t seem to know how to turn it off.

“No Ryusei?” you ask, a little surprised he couldn’t make it.

“Not yet, he should be here soon.” Sae assures you. You laugh, knowing you’re in for a really fun week once Shidou gets here. Sae turns back to look at you, taking you back to the entrance. “I’ll show you to your rooms. Did you want to share? There’s enough for everyone to have their own.”

“She snores, I’ll take my own.” Hyoma tells Sae, earning a smirk from him. You try to argue, but your best friend seems to be too convincing. The rest of the guys join you, offering to help with your bags and carry them up to your room.

And, really, who are you to say no?

Chigiri rolls his eyes, carrying his own case and entering the room Sae had planned for him. You realise Sae is sleeping in the master bedroom downstairs when you see all of the other rooms have been claimed by sneakers and jackets from the other guests, all of them are just too lazy to bring their luggage up.

Though none of them had a problem helping with yours.

Your heart sinks when you realise Sae saved your usual room for you to take. The room you always shared with your ex whenever he brought you here. The guys don’t give you much time to feel sorrowful, though. Not when they’re laughing and joking beside you. Sae notices your forlorn expression, pulling you aside slightly.

“I thought you’d feel comfortable in here, but we can switch if you want.” he tells you, but you shake your head. “Ryusei will be in the opposite room so I’m sure you won’t be thinking about anything other than how annoying he is.” he smiles.

“Thank you, Sae.” you smile, albeit a little weakly. It’s bittersweet, that’s all. “At least I have the best view.” you tell him, opening the doors to the large balcony that looks over the lake. You think about how the nearby town’s lights twinkle at night.

“Right.” he puts a sympathetic hand on your shoulder. “Everyone out, let’s leave her to unpack.” Sae announces, ushering the other three men out of the room.

You smile, waving at them all as they leave. Once they’re out, Sae closes the door behind himself and leaves you alone with your thoughts. As much as you want to sit and dwell on things, you decide to occupy your mind and unpack instead.

You’re startled, a little, when Chigiri comes in to see you. Though you’re relieved when he starts to help.

“You did not need to bring all of this.” he grabs a gold glittery mini stress and holds it up. “I— I’ve never seen this in my life. Oh my God, did you buy new clothes for this? You are trying to get a rebound.”

“No I’m—”

“Yeah, you are.” he stops you immediately. “I’ve been stalking all of their socials in my room, they’re all single. And they all had their tongues hanging out for you when you came in.”

“You work too fast.” you laugh. He shrugs, grabbing a few items of clothing and hanging them up in the wardrobe for you.

You’re thankful for his help, it goes a lot quicker than it would have otherwise. Plus you get to gossip about the week ahead. You try and dodge his questions, but your facial expressions always give you away. You have quite a good poker face, but it doesn’t matter when it comes to Chigiri. He has a way of making you shy and giggly when you’re trying to keep a secret.

“Which one?” he asks, and you tut. “I feel like they’re all your type.” he tells you, handing you your toothbrush to take to the ensuite.

“They are.” you laugh from the other room. You return, zipping up your case and pushing it away. “I’ve always had the hots for Ryusei low key though, but I think Rin would be livid.”

“Rin isn’t here and he’s not our problem.” Chigiri smiles. You both sit on top of your bed and flop backwards with a sigh. He turns his head to the side to look at you while you’re too busy disassociating, staring at the ceiling. “Don’t just do it because you feel like you have to, by the way.”

“What do you mean?” you ask. “Oh, rebound.”

He nods, “We’re here to have fun. So, if you’re going to fuck one of them, do it because it’s fun.”

“I won’t.” you agree. “I’m worried about feeling guilty too… they’re Rin’s friends, after all. I don’t want to upset him.”

As Chigiri is about to respond, he’s stopped by the sound of the doorbell ringing. You smile, widely, when you realise Ryusei is here. Hyoma knows all about Ryusei. His feral replacement whenever Rin used to take you around the world for his away games.

Hyoma isn’t jealous, of course. Especially when he knew you had a little crush on Ryusei. You and Hyoma have only ever been friends, and you’ll never be closer to anyone than you are with each other.

“Should we wait a few minutes so I don’t look desperate?” you ask, sitting upright and resting your bodyweight on one hand as you look down at him.

“Yeah.” he nods.

You nod too. You start lying back down, slowly, looking around at the room as you do. “I can’t.” you tell him, jumping off the bed and heading towards the door. He sighs, but hurries after you.

All of the guests are gathered in the entryway as they greet Ryusei. They exchange hugs and handshakes as they all chat and catch up. You descend the stairs slowly, but not fully, standing at the halfway point with Chigiri as you watch the scene unfold.

His bright smile turns to a look of wonder when he notices you. Eyes softening as he realises you’re here, you’re really here.

“No way…” he smirks, “Hey, kid, how are ya?”

“I’m good,” you nod, an embarrassingly wide smile on your face. “And you? How are you, Ryu?”

“Better for seeing you,” he laughs. “Didn’t know you were comin’.”

“Shut the door, man, it’s freezing.” Sae tells him, approaching to do it for him. But Ryusei stops him, keeping him at arm’s length so he can’t.

“I actually picked someone up on the way.” Ryusei announces, side stepping a little as he waits for the mystery guest to hurry. Chigiri’s eyes widen in horror, the realisation hitting him before anyone else as he looks at you. You’re too busy feeling deflated that Ryusei has brought a girl along with him.

“Oh no.” Chigiri speaks, and you look at him. “We should go back upstairs.”

“What? Why?” you ask him, confused. Though your attention is forced back downstairs when you see another figure enter the cabin out of your peripheral view.

Your heart sinks.

“Rin?” Sae asks as he watches his younger, yet for some reason taller, brother set down his suitcase.

Your heart keeps plummeting deeper through your body as you watch him, too. God, he looks even better than he did the day you ended things. He’s always been striking, beautiful. Just so God damn handsome. But he looks older, more mature.

You feel your breathing get heavier and more intense the longer you watch him. The way he dusts the snow from his expensive looking coat. And that familiar ruffle of his hair as he fixes it into place.

“You said you weren’t coming.” Sae tells him.

“I changed my mind,” Rin responds, gesturing to Ryusei. “He begged, really.”

Sae holds his eyes shut, sighing. Rin isn’t sure what the issue is. He was invited, after all, he just declined. He expected his brother to be happy to see him, he thought it would be a fun surprise. Though maybe he only invited him out of obligation.

Shidou hadn’t made it seem that way, though.

“Look who’s here.” Ryusei smiles, pointing up at you.

Rin’s weak smile drops to a stoic straight line as he follows his friends directional finger and his sights land on you. You’re frozen. You can’t smile. You can’t say hello. You can’t even wave. You’re just staring at each other, both absolutely paralysed with no idea how to act.

“H— Hi…” you struggle to speak. Hyoma is thankful you’re too distracted looking at Rin to see the way he’s cringing horrendously behind your back, but not showing his face to the lower floor.

“Hey.” Rin responds, even smiling a little when he hears your voice. It’s been so long, after all. “I didn’t know you were coming.” he explains.

“Same…” you tell him, hoping he believes you. “I wouldn’t have come if I knew you were coming. Wait—” you interrupt yourself when you realise how horrible that sounded.

“Stop talking.” Hyoma whispers, and you clear your throat.

Everyone else seems to see the funny side, all except Rin. He appears a little downtrodden, though he disguises it well. You know him, though. You’re sure he knows you didn’t mean it how it sounded, but you can’t help feeling a little guilty.

“You made it very clear you weren’t coming, Rin.” Sae tells him. “If you said you were coming I—”

“It’s fine. I didn’t know you were still talking, though.” Rin says, the annoyance in his voice very evident. You can’t tell if he’s purposefully trying to hurt you or if it’s just Rin being Rin. “But we’re adults. I’m sure we can co-exist for a week, right?” he asks, looking at you with his intense, teal gaze.

“R—Right…”

© 2023 rinhaler

[klaus-littlestwolf]

Series Masterlist

Warning: Very sad dog/wolf death scene, it is traumatic and that’s coming from the person who wrote it and I’m very sorry ahead of time, Emotional and Relationship Manipulation

Translation: девочка means Babygirl and for anyone who speaks Russian, if this is not accurate let me know, it’s just the most accurate one I could find on multiple translators but please correct me if I’m wrong, I’m always happy to learn and fix mistakes like that

Tag-List: @a-beaverhausen @ranisingsnew @susannahmikaelson @skulliecadaver-blog

To say that night had been hectic would be a massive understatement.

After Y/n’s mother had left the room it wasn’t 10 minutes before the door was kicked in and Y/n screamed, terrified immediately that someone was breaking in and Klaus was on his feet, growling at the 4 men that now stood in the room with guns. ‘What do you think you’re doing Rumlow?! Get Out! I was fucking sleeping you crazy assholes!’

‘That’s enough девочка, they’re here to get that animal out of my child’s bedroom.’ Klaus instantly recognized this man as Y/n’s father and he would have no matter what he had said, she looks like him in more ways than she does her mom.

‘No, he’s not going anywhere. He’s mine now, he hasn’t hurt anyone-‘

‘Yet! He’s a wild animal! It is time for him to go, I am not asking-‘

‘Of course not! You never do! You never even speak to me, let alone ask me how I feel about something! He’s not going anywhere!’ She snapped, moving to hug him and Klaus licked her face to try and comfort her, knowing this was not going to end well.

‘I’m going to give you a choice because I love you девочка. Either you take the animal outside and let it go or I get rid of it right now. It’s your choice, because I will not have a wolf in my house ready to hurt my child, it’s nice now but it’s a wild animal, it is not a pet!’ Y/n was glaring at her father but he refused to look at her. Klaus could see he didn’t want to upset her but he didn’t want to risk a wolf sleeping in his child’s bed, he can’t say it’s not logical but he sure isn’t going about it the right way. ‘Choose Y/n, or I will.’

Y/n turned to look back at him and pet him gently. ‘Come on Fenrir.’ He hopped off of the bed and followed her down the stairs and out the back door, kneeling in the grass beside him. ‘You go home, okay? I’ll bring you something special to eat tomorrow, does that sound good?’ He barked, enjoying her scratching behind his ears as always.

‘No Y/n, you will not go looking for him, you will leave him alone, no more going into the woods.’

‘What?! No! You don’t want him in the house? Fine, but he’s my friend! The only one I have in the world thanks to you! I don’t get to have friends, or boyfriends, or dates, and now I can’t even have a fucking pet?! I’ll come talk to him whenever I want and you can’t stop me!’

‘Y/n-‘

‘No! I’ve always done what you say, always, even when it means I can’t go to college or have a job or know any other human beings besides the people who you pay to be here but this isn’t fair! You don’t get to do this to me!’ She was hugging him around the neck tightly and he whined, not knowing how to comfort her.

Her father gestured to one of the men who moved to grab her and Klaus growled, lunging at him as he reached for her and biting his hand viciously. ‘Mother Fucker!’

‘He’s protecting me! That should prove that he’s good-‘

‘It proves that he’s dangerous!’ He shouted, his voice loud and pissed off as he moved to grab Y/n and haul her up. ‘Don’t look.’ He told her, trying to hold her face against him.

‘No…No! Let Go! Let Me Go! Fenrir Run!’

Klaus had to give James Barnes credit, he’s much more of an idiot than he expected. Klaus had been trying to figure out how to get Y/n to leave with him, and with how she had been raised he expected it to be difficult but no, her father was doing a fantastic job of driving her away all by himself. All this was doing was solidifying it for him, though he had always hated getting shot. Humans and their guns had gotten effective over the years and it seemed it got more painful every decade.

There was a loud gunshot which cut off Y/n’s screams and everything was silent, no one spoke, Y/n’s mother not even knowing what to say right now. ‘Clean it up.’ James demanded before pulling his daughter towards the house but she planted her feet and dug her teeth into his arm as hard as she could making him scream and let go.

A moment later she was knelt over her friends body, crying into his fur and willing him to wake up, even though she knew he wouldn’t. No one seemed to know what to do until her mother moved. ‘Honey…it’s time to go inside-‘

‘You let him do this…you’re the only person he’s ever listened to and you did nothing.’ Y/n’s voice was hollow, she didn’t have it in her to care anymore.

‘Honey, I couldn’t-‘

‘You didn’t want to. There’s a difference.’ It wasn’t until she was blaming her mother that Bucky spoke again.

‘Don’t talk to your mother like that-‘

‘Don’t you ever speak to me again.’ She cut him off, glaring up at him. ‘All you’ve done tonight is prove everything that I’ve been saying about you for years…you don’t care about me. Maybe you did when I was a kid, maybe it was all a lie, maybe once I got old enough you realized I wasn’t everything you wanted and you realized you hated me cause you can’t have any better kids. I don’t know and tonight was my last straw…I don’t care anymore. I hate you-‘

‘Y/n!’ Her mother scolded.

‘I Hate You…and not some teenage angst “I hate you” bullshit, I mean it. You were the only friend I had my entire life and for whatever reason you gave up on that and left me alone and now you couldn’t even let me have a pet as a friend. I’m done. I’m leaving, I don’t know how but I will find a way to get away from you and you will never find me again…I Hate You.’ Y/n released Fenrir’s fur and stood, pulling away from her mothers phony comfort and walking into the house without a glance back at anyone.

She knew her parents would never let her leave, they would see her as “in danger” every moment she was alone and maybe that’s true but she didn’t care, it had to be better than this lonely, painful life that she was living.

Y/n spent the rest of the night sobbing until she passed out, unable to keep her eyes open anymore.

Klaus truly felt awful for letting her believe him dead. He could see how much his wolf meant to her already and he couldn’t say he was shocked. This girl had been cut off from the outside world due to her fathers paranoia, she couldn’t leave the house and go to school or have a job or make friends and while her life with Klaus would be much the same (as he is also a paranoid bastard) he would never leave her alone to wonder if he loved her or not. She would never doubt his love. Plus she would have Fenrir to snuggle whenever she wanted.

Klaus knew that getting Y/n to trust him wouldn’t be hard and if it was any other situation he would find that funny but he loves her and he doesn’t care for how vulnerable her father has left his mate. If anyone else had gotten there before Klaus she could have been hurt and he would have had to kill her father for that, something he didn’t really want to do.

He knew that killing her parents would hurt her even if she says she hates them, therefore he wouldn’t be doing that but he also wanted James Barnes to know that his девочка was out there, alive…well…“Alive” and happy with another man and that he would never find her.

All Klaus needed to do now was create an environment that James would want or need to take his daughter to. He could compel someone to throw a party and depending on who it was he would have to bring his family or it would be insulting.

Having been invited into the house by his Princess, Klaus climbed his way through her open window and sat on her bed, stroking his fingers down her cheek. He was relieved to finally be able to touch her soft skin, even if he could only do so while she’s asleep, he would have her soon. It wouldn’t be hard to convince Y/n that he loved her and Klaus was thankful that she was his mate, he was saving her from getting hurt by a man in the future with much worse intentions and while Klaus’ intentions were to fuck her and keep her all for himself at least he knew that he would never cause her harm. He loves her. She is his mate, and he would care for his Princess for the rest of eternity.

Klaus would be her new Daddy.

And his little Baby would never be sad again.

Klaus Mikaelson Masterlist

[chuusheartattck]

THAT’S THAT ME ESPRESSO (TTME)

Chapter 32- Flashback mary ☕️

*This is a flashback chapter to Y/n and Scara’s high school days*

It was homecoming day, not any homecoming, but the last one you were ever going to experience in high school. It was your senior year and you wanted to make the most out of your last year of high school.

Your morning started out normal. The group chat was buzzing with excitement. They were also happy that Scaramouche was going to be hanging out with the group after being away for a while. He was always with his other group of friends, the ones you tried keeping away from.

You knew that Scaramouche was nothing like his friends. It was just upsetting that he wouldn’t publicly stick up for you. Despite all that, you and Scaramouche still called every night and shared things about each other’s day. He was good company to have.

The weeks leading up to the dance you both didn’t have a date. The two of you teased each other and called each other bitchless for not going with anyone but friends. However, without either one asking, it was pretty much unspoken that you two were going together. Only nobody knew, maybe besides Hu Tao and Childe. You two were also going in a group of friends. Nevertheless, as long as you hung out with him throughout the night, you didn’t really care.

You got ready at Hu Tao’s house. You both were running a bit behind schedule, mostly Hu Tao making both of you late. The two of you were supposed to meet up with the group to take photos but that didn’t happen.

When the two of you finished getting ready it was already 7:15, homecoming started at 7:00.

“Hu Tao we are so late.”

“It’s fine! The others are barely on the way there now. Even if the line is long to get in, we can just cut with people we know.”

Hu Tao’s time blindness made you concern but you shrugged it off. Her parents were driving you there. There weren’t any official plans on what to do after but someone is most likely throwing a party. Nobody knew who yet.

Hu Tao was wearing a short but simple burgundy dress. Her hair was styled into her iconic pigtails and you thought she looked very pretty. However, she got some new black high heels and can tell she was struggling to walk.

“Are you ok?” You asked as the two of you descended down the stairs.

“Yeah I just need to break into these shoes more,” Hu Tao held onto your hand and the staircase railing to prevent herself from falling.

“By the end of the night you’re going to take those things off.”

“I hope not. These were expensive and I want to make them last.”

You playfully shook your head and got to the bottom of the stairs. Her parents were already waiting for you both.

“Hu Tao you look so gorgeous! Y/n you look amazing as well!” Her mother complimented you both.

You thank her and noticed Hu Tao’s dad taking out his phone for pictures.

Hu Tao tried protesting against it saying how late you guys were but eventually gave in. After a few photos, her mom was driving you both to the school. Teyvat High School only booked venues for winter formal and prom. Homecoming was always at the school. Luckily, it was an outdoor school.

“Is anyone there already?” You turned to ask Hu Tao.

She was texting the group chat so you didn’t bother to look at your phone yourself, “Lumine said they’re all in line already. They’re at the back and the line is long apparently,” She replied back.

“I hope they play good songs this year. Last year was kinda boring.”

“That’s because last year you went with some complete weirdo.”

Hu Tao wasn’t wrong. The year prior, you were talking with someone and you two went to homecoming together. You both left an hour in because his friends wanted to go somewhere else. You wished you had stayed longer but you didn’t want to complain. You two never dated because you soon found out he only wanted you because you were a trainee. Instantly broke it off.

You two finally arrived and it already 7:50. It was dark out but you could still see the number of students in line. There was security watching the line as well to make sure that nobody was cutting.

When you two got out of the car you heard some people gasp and point at Hu Tao. Sometimes you forget she’s a rapper under a big company. You quickly spotted your friends and waved to them. Only Lumine noticed and grabbed the other’s attention. They motioned for the two of you to come into line with them but a guard was watching. Fortunately, he spotted some other people trying to cut into the line and started to walk towards them.

You and Hu Tao wasted no time merging into line where your friends were and acted like you were there the entire time.

The group was all there, Cyno, Kazuha, Aether, Thoma, Lumine, and last but not least, Scaramouche.

You and him made eye contact and he looked really good. Granted, he was wearing a normal suit that looks like every other guy there but he was wearing the dark purple tie you said he should get.

“The fuck are you staring at?” Scaramouche glared at you with a dirty look.

“Not your ugly ass,” You move away rolling your eyes, “I was looking at how pretty Lumine is.”

Lumine was wearing a blue dress that complimented her figure. She reminded you of Cinderella with her blonde hair.

“You barely got into line and you two are already fighting,” Kazuha sighed.

“You two need to settle this feud in bed,” Cyno laughed.

“I would rather listen to Hu Tao’s shitty song on repeat than ever get into bed with Y/n.”

“Who are you calling a shitty song?” Hu Tao yelled back.

“Ok! Time for shots!” Aether interrupts. He swung his arms around you and Hu Tao’s shoulders, handing you guys a small shot bottle of Tito’s.

“There was more but we pre gamed in the car and could only save you one bottle each,” Aether explained.

“Maybe if you weren’t so late you could’ve gotten more,” Scaramouche chimed in.

“You sound obsessed,” You grumbled cracking open the bottle. You made sure to turn away from the security guards so you don’t get caught.

As you were chugging you felt the burning sensation of the vodka pour down your throat. Alcohol never tasted good, you just wanted to loosen up more.

Cyno thought it would be funny to slightly tilt the bottle as you were drinking, causing the remaining alcohol to spill all over your mouth and onto your outfit.

You began to choke and cough.

“What the fuck!” You yelled in between coughs. Your throat was stinging and becoming increasingly dry. You were hoping to get inside soon so you can grab a water bottle.

Only Cyno and Aether bursted out laughing, everyone else tried holding back their laugh. You wiped your mouth and tried wiping down the wet spots on your clothes. Not even inside and your clothes were already ruined.

You guys were about to head inside, quickly you and Hu Tao threw the tiny bottles into a bush. The school would probably just find it later.

After getting checked in, you immediately went over to a table to grab some water to soothe your throat. This time, you drank away from your friends.

“Where should we go first?” Thoma pipes up. The school had a big budget and the student council spent all of it on a DJ, food trucks, gaming trucks and photo booths.

“Let’s go in the mosh pit!” Hu Tao suggested, pointing to the crowd of people in the distance.

This was high school and their version of a mosh pit is just jumping up and down while also shoving people when their favorite song plays. It’s fun for a little but you feel like you’ll get trampled after a while.

“I’ll sit this one out. I want to take photos first before sweating off my makeup,” Lumine says, sitting down at a nearby lunch table.

“Yeah I’ll wait till after we take photos, my mom will get pissed if I look terrible in them,” Thoma replies, sitting down next to Lumine.

Kazuha sits down on the opposite side of the table, “Mosh pits aren’t really my thing. We’ll wait here until you guys are done, then we can go to the photo booths. Is that ok with you guys?”

“Boo you’re no fun! But ok we’ll only be in there for a little bit,” Hu Tao replies as she sets downs her purse onto the table, “Watch my bag.”

The rest of you make your way over to the crowd.

Fein by Travis Scott began to blast through the speakers. You saw people rushing in and took it as a sign to do the same. Luckily, Hu Tao didn’t mind shoving people out of the way. She grabbed your hand and all of you guys made your way in.

Despite holding onto her hand, it still felt like you were going to fall. You were jumping up and down to the song but there were more people coming in and bumping into you. The mixed smell of sweat and Dior Sauvage made the air feel hot and heavy.

You were going to need a break soon. However, the next song being Family Ties by Kendrick and Baby Keem didn’t want to make you stop. More and more people were coming in and you were getting pushed around.

Your grip from Hu Tao was slipping and it really did feel like you were going to fall. You quickly grabbed onto the arm of the nearest person, which happens to be Scaramouche.

He looked at you and noticed your predicament, “Dumbass,” He muttered, rolling his eyes as he interlocks his fingers with yours.

You couldn’t help but smile and continue jumping. His grip was a lot stronger than Hu Tao’s which made you feel more safer. You weren’t worried about anyone noticing since everyone was occupied with not getting trampled.

After a few more songs played, you felt a tap on your shoulder. Your breath hitched thinking you had been caught. You slowly turned around and felt relief when you realized it was only Cyno. Granted, he didn’t know anything about you two but it would’ve been worst if it was a stranger.

“Hey, let’s take a break Aether doesn’t feel well and I don’t want him throwing up.”

You nodded and whispered to Scaramouche who also nodded and stopped jumping. You held Cyno’s hand as he led you two out of the mosh pit, like the buddy system.

As the three of you got out, you felt the cold night air against your skin. It felt nice after being in that stuffy environment. You didn’t realize how much you were sweating and panting. You looked down and noticed you were still holding Scaramouche’s hand.

He scoffed and quickly pulled his hand back.

Whatever.

You made your way back to the table and saw Aether with his head down and groaning.

“Holy shit are you ok?” You asked concerned for your friend.

Aether simply put his thumbs up in the air. He wasn’t too good with tight spaces. You sat down next to him and Lumine. She was the more famous twin but you were never really close with her. She was always away filming and doing photoshoots. You sometimes wonder how he can be related to her.

“Can you get up already? You’re so dramatic.” Lumine sighed, pinching her nose bridge, “The photo booth line is going to get longer the more we wait.”

“Is that anyway to treat your brother?” Aether mumbled, he looked up to glare at his sister before putting his head down again.

“I should’ve eaten you in the womb,” Lumine shot back.

After a few minutes, Aether was feeling less nauseous and was ready to take photos.

Fortunately, there was no line and all eight of you squished your way into the photo booth. It was quite spacious but it did feel tight being all there together. There were props and signs laid out inside and everyone took something.

The booth only took four photos. In the first photo, you and Thoma had your arms around the other person’s shoulders and pointing at each other. In the second photo, you did a simple peace sign. In the third photo, you were hugging Hu Tao.

In the last photo, Kazuha accidentally elbowed Scaramouche which prompted him to almost fall. Due to everyone cramped up next to each other, you all came down with him. The photo captured everyone trying not to fall and nobody looked their best, except Thoma. He was the only one who looked at the camera and posed.

Everyone got out and waited for the photos to be printed.

“I apologize to the person’s ass who I grabbed while trying to keep balance,” Aether says, scratching the back of his head.

“I think that was mine dude,” Cyno replied laughing.

You rolled your eyes, “Scara is so weak that he stumbled when Kazuha barely tapped him.”

“See how weak I am when I punch you in the face,” Scaramouche grumbled as he took the photos from the machine, handing them to each person.

You looked down at the photo collage as you all began walking back to your table. You smile fondly at what would only be a distant memory in the future. Your senior year had only started but it will quickly end before you could even blink.

You didn’t want to miss out on the good memories like this one.

.

.

.

Everyone had split up after a while to do different activities. You all agreed to meet up when the night ended but for now, you lost everyone and didn’t know what to do. You had just came out from the mosh pit and your feet were hurting too much to continue. You decided to take a small breather somewhere far away from everyone.

You went up the stairs that leads to one of the buildings that had a balcony where you can see the football field. You would come up here when you were bored with class and wanted to walk around.

Only this time, it appears you weren’t alone. You noticed a familiar figure already looking out. One of which you were hoping to get alone time this night.

He heard your footsteps and turned around to look at you.

“Can’t you see I was here first?”

“Can’t you see that I don’t give a fuck?” You scoffed and stood next to him. He didn’t move from his position.

Scaramouche sighed and took out a pack of cigarettes.

“How did you get those pass the security?”

“I have my ways,” He said while putting one in his mouth and casually lighting one.

He took a long drag and exhaled, making sure to clear out the smoke with his hand. He silently passed it onto you.

You took it from his hand, “If we get caught we’re getting suspended.”

“Maybe they’ll suspend you but definitely not me. I’ll just have my agency contact the school.”

“You and your fame.”

“Something you wouldn’t know about.”

You scoffed, “In case you forgot, I was on that idol survival show. People still know me.”

“Yeah but who didn’t debut.”

You stood silent. It was pointless ever getting into a petty argument. He knew how to silence you every time.

You only took out your phone in response.

“Let’s take a photo together!”

“Hell no. Don’t you have the one we took with the others?”

“Yeah but I want one with just us. Let’s take a 0.5 photo.”

“No.”

“Too bad we’re taking one anyways.”

Scaramouche rolled his eyes and got closer next to you. He looked straight at the camera as you took the photo. When you were done you looked at the photo.

“See how cute we look!”

He side eyed you, “I’m the one that looks good. Not so sure about you though.”

“Fuck you.”

Scaramouche tried to hold in his laughter as he looked away from you.

“Kidding. You look better than normal,” Scaramouche says, putting out the shared cigarette and throwing it off the ledge.

You weren’t sure if that was a compliment or an insult.

“Thank you? Uh, you too I guess,” You huffed, leaning forward against the railing.

There was a moment of silence shared between the two of you as you both stared at the football field in front of you. The distant sound of music only filled the air. It was a comfortable silence and you wished it would last forever, staying by his side like this.

It was cold up on the balcony and the night breeze caused you to shiver a bit. Scaramouche of course noticed.

“Are you cold?”

“No.”

“No,” Scaramouche mimicked your voice, “Yet you’re starting to shake more than a tweaker waiting for his next fix.” He said in his regular voice as he took off his suit jacket and put it over your shoulders.

“I didn’t ask for your jacket,” You tried protesting. You secretly enjoyed it though, that’s why you held it closer to you.

“Do you want it or do you want to continue being cold?”

You didn’t respond.

“Exactly,” Scaramouche huffed in annoyance.

You enjoyed moments like these. Ones where it was the two of you alone and you can talk freely like this. It made you upset whenever it ended, because you knew he would go back to ignoring you in the hallways.

You were getting lost in your thoughts and his words from earlier kept coming back.

“Who didn’t debut.”

It was silly to get stuck on that. You knew the votings were rigged, everyone did, but it still hurt. You gave it your all and worked hard to debut but it wasn’t enough.

You had gotten back to school and it was all anyone could talk about. You’ve gained sympathy and comfort from others, but it didn’t make the failure any less painful.

It made you realize how things can come and go so quickly. That’s why you had a bittersweet feeling about being in your last year of high school. It has been a rough four years and you were glad to not be able to see some of your peers, but what about your friends?

The friends that have been supporting you through everything. They’re going to be studying in different universities. It’s going to be hard to keep in contact and you’ll be trying to train your ass off to debut.

“Do you think after the school year ends, we’ll still be in contact with each other?” You piped up, breaking the silence to look over at him.

He hesitated for a moment before replying, “I don’t see why we wouldn’t.” Not sparing a glance at your direction.

“It’s just your popularity is rising and if I don’t end up debuting then it’ll be hard to keep in contact with you. It’s easier to continue seeing each other if we’re both in the entertainment industry,” You managed to say, looking away from him this time.

“You’re worried I’ll forget about you?”

“You’re making me sound desperate,” You mumbled, hint of annoyance in your tone.

“The company would be stupid if they only keep you as a trainee forever. You’re not untalented and you put in the effort. Some look helpless on stage, but not you.”

You couldn’t help but smile at his words. Despite Scaramouche being an asshole half the time, he knows when to be sorta nice.

You two often shared things that were troublesome. It was almost like the other one knew what the other one was feeling at the moment. It was something special you two had. Even when one of you was being emotionally constipated, you both still tried your best to give advice to the other person.

“Though, you can work on your dancing skills,” He quickly said.

Never mind. Moment ruined.

You smacked him on the back of his head. He always humbles a person after giving a rare compliment. Most of the time it’s backhanded.

Scaramouche was about to say something but the two of you heard footsteps coming from behind you guys. You both froze not wanting to turn around, afraid it was someone that would freak out if they saw the two of you together.

A familiar voice rang through both of your guy’s ears, “Y/n? Scara?”

You both turn around to see Thoma standing there. You sigh a wave of relief when you see your friend. Though, he’s definitely confused on the close proximity you and Scaramouche are sharing, but doesn’t say anything.

Instead he says, “It’s almost over. Let’s head back to the car. Do you guys need a ride?”

You both nod in unison and begin to follow Thoma back. You silent give Scaramouche his jacket back. It’d be a scandal if people caught you with him like this.

The three of you silently make your way to the parking lot where the others were. You didn’t realize how many of you there were until you thought about the car situation.

“Ok there’s no way I’m fitting all of us into my car,” Thoma sighed pointing at his suv.

“Too bad, make it happen. You have a big enough car. Two people can sit in the trunk, three people in the backseat but someone has to sit on someone’s lap, and the other person sits in the front,” Cyno suggested.

Everyone agreed right away, however, Thoma hesitated before agreeing begrudgingly. That’s how you ended up sitting in the trunk with Scaramouche. Lumine, Hu Tao, Aether and Cyno were all in the backseat. Aether sitting on Cyno’s lap and Kazuha in the front seat.

Before you even left the parking lot, you guys were discussing on where to go.

“I heard Keqing is throwing an after party,” Cyno mumbled, barely heard from Aether sitting on him.

“Dude I swear if I feel something hard underneath me,” Aether grumbled, clearly him sitting on Cyno’s lap was not his first choice.

“I can say the same for you,” Cyno argued back.

You didn’t know how you and Scaramouche ended in the trunk. It was pretty spacious given the car model so it wasn’t too uncomfortable and you both had leg room. You just sat on opposite sides from each other.

“Can we get food? I’m lowkey hungry as fuck right now,” Kazuha mentioned. While everyone was arguing on who sits where, he silently hopped in the passenger seat.

Everyone agreed and that’s how you ended up at In-N-Out at midnight. It wasn’t packed but you guys stood out due to your attire. It’s not like you guys gave a fuck though.

After you all finished with your food, you guys decided to go to the park since you didn’t want the night to end. It was around two in the morning and you were sitting on a bench watching your friends mess around at the playground.

It was nice to see everyone goof around. However, it brought you back to that bittersweet feeling you noticed before. Seeing their smiles and hearing their laughter. There's this warmth in your heart, knowing how much joy you all bring to each other. At the same time, there's a tinge of sadness because you realize this might be one of the last times you’re all together like this. It's your last year before you all go your separate ways, and you can't help but cherish every moment, knowing that soon, things will change.

After a while, everyone got tired and Thoma dropped everyone home. You put the photo booth photo on your dresser, next to the photos you had of your friends.

.

This is the memory you had just remembered as you stare at that photo. The photo of your friends at your last homecoming. Setting the photo down, you look back at your phone. You haven’t contacted your friends since school has ended, even though you promised. Things have gotten busy but you miss them dearly. One day, you’ll have a reunion and it’ll be like the old times.

Masterlist II Previous II Next

A/N: Sorry this took a while I’ve been busy studying for tests 😓 Also as a little hint: this friend group is the same one in my next xiao smau (except for thoma he’s a replacement) so this is what would happen if xiao wasn’t in the picture at all :) Also i tried to write the mosh pit scene based on experience 😭 Do not go into one in heels my feet were so bruised and bleeding by the end.

ALSOOO lmk if you guys want your users to be added to this au and i’ll make you a twitter user :)

Synopsis: You’re a new idol that just debuted under ‘Fontaine Entertainment’ with your new single ‘Espresso.’ You just graduated high school which means all your classmates are shocked to see you into stardom. Including your old situationship, who happens to be an actor.

Taglist: @skyoverkill1 @quacking-simp @lolmeowing @astro-stars @kaitfae @sl-vega @scarawiki @yuminako @samyayaya @skyvella @kur0kki @practicoi @kukikoooo @scaraenthusiast1 @shutingstar @lloovvv @moonjellyfishie @miy-svz @xionri @lalalaloveallmydays @hearts4lizzzz @kathiwis @state-of-grac3 @morgyyyyyyy @scaradooche @theyluvkatt @meigalaxy @noirechomps @crimxeorcremeexistspeacefully @vxcmx @ariesloves @cayl33n @animeobsessed56 @heartsforni-ki @feikyuu @ichcocat @strayharmony943 @chscklvr @kunikissr @jiminscarmex @sp1ng @bananasquash @aceakariii @thegalaxyisunfolding @ariilies @hisfuture @automaticpatroltragedy @sartrst @cheriswag @kokomiskiss @albedomestic-airline @lxkeeeee @sundays-prince @wvvyq @amurotoorudesu @ennsposts @illu-fu @vitanye

[devondespresso]

Just Let Me Come Home

T | 2850 words | Stomarol, post s2, pre-relationship | also on ao3 | cw: very minor implied child neglect

Gift for @momotonescreaming Happy very late Birthday Momo!!! STWG prompt: Home

Thank you so much to @pearynice for betaing!!

Hawkins’ sun sets early in November.

When school starts tapering off into winter break, so does the light each day, the world getting darker until it looks like midnight at six in the afternoon and no one can see Steve riding shotgun in the police chief's car.

It’s been a hell of a week. Or, more accurately, one hellish night with consequences bleeding into the days after, until the bruising on Steve’s face starts fading into uglier muddier colors and Hopper decides he’s been waiting in the hospital long enough, telling him to start the mental list for what he’ll pack in his overnight bag.

Steve looks out the window as Hop drives, letting the cold glass ice the headache pressing against his forehead, watching the lamplit storefronts as they drive, staring out as the occasional passerby glances over the car, unseeing, before turning back to whatever they were doing before.

It’s dark. They can’t see much, and they don’t really need to. They don’t really care.

Which makes it awfully convenient that hell keeps coming to Hawkins just after dark. It brings a lot less questions that he can’t answer, about nausea and terror that he can’t explain, that he wouldn’t know how to even if he could. 

It’s convenient. Gives Steve less people to worry about, less names to remember when things go bump in the night.

Hop drives past the end of Main street, the end of paved sidewalks and streetlights. He stops at a four-way to let another car turn, then takes a left down a darker road.

House lights take the place of street lamps, windows flaunting squares of lustrous orange light in every house they pass. The distance makes the light hazier, easier on the ache behind his eyes.

The street is familiar, more than just small-town same-roads familiar. It becomes depressingly familiar as the Perkins' house appears ahead, that feeling more of an indicator than the house’s appearance right now. Light fills almost every damn window, except for Carol’s bedroom upstairs.

Her powder blue convertible is missing from the driveway, too, and its absence leaves the whole house sickeningly monochrome.

It's probably in Tommy's driveway. He could check to be sure, they’ll pass by it in a block or two.

As quick as it appeared, Carol’s house disappears again, passing behind them just like every other house on the block.

Steve closes his eyes.

Keeps them closed, until the car slows drastically but doesn't feel the turn into the driveway.

Steve opens his eyes, glances towards Hopper and finds him looking out into the dark ahead, warily. Steve follows his gaze, and his stomach turns.

There’s a powder blue convertible stalling in front of his house—roof uncharacteristically up and hiding the interior—haphazardly parked half off the road. The people in the front seat are arguing, and there’s smoke billowing out the back still like they’re ready to take off at any second.

Hop rolls closer, headlights lighting up everything. Steve leans forward to get a better look, and Tommy’s face turns around in the driver’s seat to look back at them.

Tommy’s eyes pass over Steve, unseeing, then skipping by Hop too as he just sees a cop car and panics. He gets ready to drive off, only to be stopped by Carol’s hand from the passenger’s seat. 

It's uncomfortable just looking at them. Tommy is awkwardly crammed into Carol’s front seat like he’s too big for it—maybe because he is, maybe it's still adjusted for Carol—and Carol looks like she's fighting the seatbelt that's keeping her from jumping across the dash and taking the wheel herself. 

And what’s worse, they’re sticking with it. They’re parked on the side of the road and yet neither get out to switch seats and go back to what they're used to.

Hop shifts the car into park, and Steve glances over to find Hopper already looking at him, eyebrows raised and quietly asking. 

Steve turns back to the car in front of them for a second. Carol glances back from her spot in the passenger’s seat too, then turns to her real objective of saying something to Tommy. Something Tommy, apparently, doesn’t want to hear. Has already heard several times, if the overplayed frustration is anything to go by.

Steve sighs.

“I’ve got it.” Steve mutters, and ducks down to find his keys in his bag.

Hopper doesn’t say anything and goes back to eyeing Carol's car, but when Steve sits back up he shoots him another uncertain look.

“You’ll know if I change my mind.” Steve says, and gets out of the car.

The headlights sting his eyes even from behind so Steve squints and turns his head away from them, watches his step and shoves his keys into his pockets as he walks over. A car door in front of him opens, letting the tail end of a very annoyed “Carol!” slip out before it slams shut again and the familiar clacking of boots makes its way over to him. 

Steve looks up properly and Carol stops, squinting from the headlights, staring at the bruising on his face openly, shock softening a very reassuring grimace. Steve closes the last bit of distance so he doesn't have to be loud, doesn’t make this any bigger than it has to be.

“Can this happen at literally any other time?” 

Carol stares at the worst spots of his face for another second, trying to juggle new thoughts with whatever the hell she was planning to say, but a voice from the other side of her car beats her to it.

“Steve?”

He and Carol both look over at Tommy, standing from the driver's seat to get a better look over the hood of the car, equally taken aback, if only for a second.

Tommy jogs over—that slowed down jog to keep from looking too uncool—and stops, a little further away than Carol is, keeping a cold distance. It nicks an old nerve, one he's used to having hit, but now it’s fanning a bitter flame that he’s happy to indulge.

“What the hell happened to you?” Tommy says.

“Why do you care?”

“Steve.” Carol snaps at him.

“No, actually, what are either of you even doing here?”

“Looking for you, asshole.” Carol says, and takes barely a step forward. 

“Carol dragged me with her.” Tommy says, with that light, cocky tone he’d use in the hallways or on the court or in the locker room, where everythings a goddamn joke.

“Tommy.” Carol hisses, hitting Tommy’s arm and Tommy scowls at her.

“Well that makes this easy then.” Steve says, letting bored disdain leak out with every breath. He directs an extra bit of bitterness Tommy’s way, then turns back towards his house.

“Steve–” 

Tommy grabs his arm. Reaches out and grabs for him. 

Steve turns back and looks down at Tommy’s hand on his forearm, pointedly, then back up at Tommy. Challenging, to let Tommy know he’s doing it—reaching out and touching another boy—and waits for Tommy to let go or pretend it’s more aggressive than he meant it.

Tommy’s hand slips away and falls to the side.

“Look, man,” Tommy starts, “We heard about Wheeler–”

“Yeah, I know.” Steve says, and even though his voice wavers Steve tries to make it harsh, be cold and detached like he would be if they were in the halls right now. “You just know everything there is to know about Nancy Wheeler these days.”

Carol makes a face at him and Tommy scowls again, and it feels like so much, feels familiar and nauseating, soothing and insufferable.

“Man, I’m fucking trying, alri–”

“To do what?”

Tommy pauses, face still scowling but his eyes searching, confused.

“What are you trying to do?” Steve asks again.

Tommy looks away, shoves his hands into his jacket pocket. “Fucking talk, man, what…” Tommy smiles, shoots him a look of casual apathy, doing it on purpose now. “What does it look like I’m doin’.”

Steve tamps down a curled lip, keeping mostly neutral as he stares at Tommy. Making a show of listening even after he stopped talking, waiting for either another deflection or a real answer.

It takes Tommy a good few seconds to realize Steve isn’t planning on playing along. He connects the dots and drops the casual act, apathy hardening into irritation, and refuses to say anything.

Steve glances over to Carol, standing off to the side and mostly watching Tommy. She catches Steve’s eye, but with nothing written on her face. 

She looks at Tommy again but doesn’t try to intervene, doesn’t try to say anything.

Steve turns again quietly, away from the cars and headlights, and starts up his driveway. Gets a little ways away before Tommy does anything about it.

“Steve, fucking– hold on!” 

Steve turns before Tommy can reach him, catching him off guard, so instead of grabbing Steve’s arm Tommy gestures around with that energy, pointing to him and Carol and right at Steve’s chest.  

“We came out here because it was always the three of us, always! You, me, and Carol. And then you ran away, you keep fucking off to do your own thing like neither of us ever mattered.”

“So you came here to yell at me.” 

“I came here because you sure as hell weren’t coming back! You were getting off on ‘caring about other people’ but you don’t give two shits about us!”

Tommy lets the words hit, then loses steam with a loaded huff. He stares Steve down like Steve’s dragging the word out of him, like Steve’s the one forcing this conversation to happen.

“And you’re happier now.” 

Tommy looks sick with it, keeps channeling anger over the sickness and it’s working, he’s yelling, but Steve can’t stop seeing what’s under there. 

“But we still give a shit about you, and Carol dragged both our asses over here cause she’s the only one with enough balls to admit it.”

Tommy’s hand moves again, barely a reach that’s pulled back, a small reflex that Tommy probably doesn't notice, but Steve does, only because he’s looking for it.

A lump forms and clogs Steve’s throat—and Tommy sees it, something of it because he lets the anger melt out, smooths it down a little until–

“You tell me to fuck off and I’ll do it, but you’re going to let me fucking try first.”

–until he just looks like Tommy again.

Steve crashes forward and pulls Tommy in tight for a hug. Wraps his arms around him, ducks his face down into Tommy’s shoulder, half for himself, half as a final test, to see if Tommy would let him– let himself give as much of a shit as he used to.

Tommy jumps but grabs onto him with that reflex, wraps his arms around Steve's back and holds him just as tight, maybe tighter. Tears well up in Steve’s eyes, the treacherous kind that aren’t asking if or when they could fall, so Steve buries them in the collar of Tommy's shirt.

Tommy laughs a little, light with surprise and wonder and fucking joy, rumbling soothingly from his chest, from his throat right by Steve’s ear, and it makes Steve smile, too. Smiling so wide, even as tears fall freely and he silently chokes on his relief.

Tommy presses his face, too, into Steve’s shoulder, not quite tall enough to tuck his chin over. He presses his smile into the collar of Steve’s shirt and leans his head against Steve’s, so much softer, so much more confident, and more truly at ease than Steve’s seen him before.

Steve takes in a deep breath, slow and long so it feels like enough, and revels in the steadiness,  the warmth around him. And for the first time in a while, it’s easier to keep himself upright.

Another hand settles gently on his shoulder, light enough that it doesn’t hurt the bruises that have to be somewhere around there.

Steve pulls back, just enough to stand up straight and see Carol keeping her hand on Steve’s shoulder, looking slightly worried and only getting worse when he meets her eyes.

Steve shakes his head, wipes the wetness from his eyes, cringing when he presses against bruises, just making more tears fall.

Steve swallows hard and takes a deep breath again.

“I missed you guys, too.”

Carol moves fast, pulls him into her own tight hug immediately, squeezes a choked sob out of him instead of words. He hugs her back tightly, buries the lower half of his face in her hair, and gets a strong whiff of Farrah Fawcett hairspray.

Carol gives him one more squeeze before her grip mellows out into something gentler, decidedly gentle, and just as steady. And she stays there, face resting on his shirt, right over his heart like it's just as much for her as it is for him. His throat clogs up again, and Steve doesn't think he’s ever been happier.

After a moment or so, Carol mutters something that Steve doesn’t catch.

“What?” Tommy asks before Steve can.

Carol huffs with so much of her signature annoyance that Steve can't help but snort to himself too. She moves back but with an arm still tucked around Steve, shoots him a quick glare that doesn’t hide any of her fondness—if she was even trying to hide it—and turns to Tommy to enunciate everything at him.

“I said, it took you two long enough.”

 Tommy rolls his eyes immediately, like he’s heard something like this a million times before.

“Yeah, thanks for helping, by the way.” 

“You’re welcome.” Carol says, all over-innocent and cheery and it makes Tommy roll his eyes harder, “You two needed someone sensible around. All this emotional constipation really isn't a great look.”

Steve wrinkles his nose at the word choice while Tommy scoffs.

“Yeah, you’re real mature, like you didn’t bite Nichole Turner’s head off for finding that old swim team hoodie you won’t get rid of.”

“Tommy!”

Carol hits Tommy’s arm again, betrayed and annoyed but not trying to deny it.

“You kept that?”

Carol glances over before resolutely avoiding eye contact and shrugs, but doesn’t refute it.

“Awww Caroooool,” he says, drawing the words out comically, putting an arm around her, “You missed—” 

“It’s a sweatshirt.”

“You missed meeeee.” He sings and hugs her again, playing up the schmaltzy sweet flair.

“You two are such—” she starts, then sighs heavily before giving up, dropping her head to lean into Steve’s hug.

Steve smiles and looks back over to Tommy—to give Carol her moment to recover—and catches a soft smile on his face, too.

Tommy’s eyes flick up to meet Steve’s and he pauses like he knows he’s been caught.

“So…” Steve starts.

“Yeah.” Tommy says, landing a hand on his shoulder, casual except for how Tommy keeps it there, normal except for how it’s making Steve melt. “You gonna be alright?”

“Yeah, yeah, don’t worry about it. I'm gonna head inside—”

“And find a bag of peas or something,” Carol interrupts, pulling away to give Steve another look, “I mean, like, in a nice way–”

“Don’t hurt yourself.” 

“You look like you’ve been hit by a car.”

“Yeah.” he laughs.

“Did you?”

“No, no…” Steve shakes his head. “No, it’s uh… long story.”

Carol raises an eyebrow, and when Steve turns to Tommy instead he finds him also giving Steve a searching look. Steve smiles a little, enjoying the care despite the context and the subjects he has to breach at some point—god especially when it comes to school again, basketball’s about to be a fucking mess—

“I’ll tell you guys later. Promise.” He says and he means it, even if he can only throw together some half baked explanation—maybe blame a little more on Hargrove than he really needs to—he wants them around enough to know. And also, maybe selfishly, wants them around enough to know when he’s lying, to know when there’s things he won’t say.

But for now, Tommy and Carol both accept the promise for later. And Steve nods over towards the front door.

Carol takes the silent invitation immediately, heads up the dark driveway and to the front of the house with Steve and Tommy not far behind her.

Carol waits by the steps for them as they catch up and lets Steve go ahead to the door, whispering something cheeky and teasing to Tommy that catches him off guard, makes him stutter for a second before muttering something snippy back.

Steve bites back a laugh and turns to the door. He finds his keys in his pocket and picks out the house key smoothly as Tommy and Carol linger behind him, their presence and their voices calming something in him, making the gaping void behind them feel less vast, less pressing.

He clicks the lock and opens the door wide and it’s somehow darker than what they’re already standing in.

Steve wanders in blindly, and Tommy and Carol follow right behind.

[caustinen]

i saw this video and the brainrot overcame me and i wrote 2.4k words of secret agent!bucky and bond girl!gale except that actually he’s the son of a mob boss that works as a double agent

tags: smut / feelings / angst / injuries / tending of injuries

enjoy?

hold me like a knife (ao3)

It takes only three simple words, and the pain in Bucky’s wounds seem to vanish at once as he fighst a grin — his first smile for days.

”You look horrible.”

Gale speaks in his matter-of-fact and yet oddly tender tone as always, as if he was just observing facts that had no real implications for him; it’s the very same tone that caught Bucky’s interest in the first place before he ever even saw his face.

He loses the fight with the grin, though it’s quickly overcome with a grimace as he leans to the doorframe and accidentally touches on a fresh bruise. ”I missed you too, doll,” he manages to sound nonchalant, at least to his own ears, but the slight tightening of Gale’s expressions reveals he has been caught. A gentle but determined hand reaches for the collar of his jacket and pulls him into the hotel room, Bucky making sure to kick the door closed behind himself. The lock clicks just as soft fingers run down the less bruised side of his face before he’s guided down so the shorter man can press a careful kiss to his lips. His own hands land on his shoulders, running up and down his biceps and squeezing lightly. He’s like a child who has gotten his favorite plushie back after a vaction, he supposes, as he seeks the comfort of touch with the despair of a starving man.

The kiss starts light, careful, Gale clearly trying to determin how much Bucky is hurting — the lower lip is slightly swollen from where it split to a knife — but as Bucky presses himself closer and tries his luck with a tentative lick between his lips, Gale sighs before opening up to him. Bucky only realizes how tense he has been when his shoulders drop and he relaxes into Bucky’s embrace. The hitched breathes and sighs and wet sounds of their lips meeting fill the silence between them, and Bucky can feel life bleed back into him with each little silent ngh that Gale probably doesn’t even realize he’s making.

The slowness molded by the simple pleasure of the other’s body heat close starts to vanish into real passion, the touch of their mouths getting more demanding, but unfortunately a nib of Gale’s teeth on his tender lip makes him hiss in pain, immediately pulling Gale farther away. Bucky doesn’t let him go far, hands now secured around the small of his back, and Gale doesn’t fight him either. He’s blushed by their effort and his lips are slightly swollen now too as his eyes travel over Bucky’s face once more, no doubt noting each of his visble wounds and calculating how many he’s hiding underneath his suit. His eyes stop on the three hazardly done stitches on his left eyebrow, and Bucky knows he doesn’t need to tell him he’s put them there himself, just now on the plane.

He might tell him later, when they’re cooling down under a single blanket and Gale’s playing with his hair or fingers and he doesn’t have to look him in the face as he talks because he knows Gale will be latching on to each word, not missing a single unvoiced moment of pain and fear from his story that he’s not ready to admit even to himself.

Gale hums. He looks like he’s deep in thought, but Bucky can tell he’s still more alert than most people are when they really put their mind to it, just by the virtue of his upbringing. The thought physcally aches somewhere deep in his insides and Bucky realizes more than ever what a bad idea it was to come here like this, he’s clearly too in his feelings to be acting rationally, too raw from the gruelling assignment and worrying about Gale. His arms around the smaller man tighten without his permission but Gale doesn’t comment on it, still carefully mapping out his face with his gaze and fingertips.

”You should be at a hospital,” he finally says, whispers, really, the worry and relief he’s still at one piece battling each other over every syllable. Bucky swallows the lump from his throat and forces a grin. They don’t have long, they never do, and he’ll be damned if he made it all the way back just to crumble at his feet.

(Gale would let him, and pick him back up and put together no matter how many pieces he’d be in, and that’s why he won’t.)

”Nah,” Bucky says, satisfied with how truly carefree he does sound that time, ”I had to come see my baby first.” The endearement works wonders like always. Gale let’s out a silent breath and his eyes soften despite shaking his head slightly before reaching for another kiss. It’s softer, again, taking them back to the start, and that’s fine with Bucky, he’s too tired and tender for all these emotions right now. ”Well, you’re not gonna bleed all over my sheets,” Gale tells him as he pulls back again, ”c’mon, let’s get you cleaned up.”

Bucky lets his mind fade into a pleasant hum in the background as Gale unburdens him from his suit layers, biting his lip unhappily as he uncovers the bruising and cuts all over his torso but not saying anything. Bucky’s merely an observer as he’s pushed into the shower, the water pleasant rythm on his tired body. He leans to the cold wall and closes his eyes, unsure how long he just stays there taking it in before the door opens and closes with silent clicks and a smaller body presses against him. He keeps his eyes closed when Gale washes his hair, humming in content, following the gentle guidance of sure hands he trusts with the essances of his soul. He opens his eyes when Gale’s hands make a long stop on his cheeks again after rinsing the shampoo of. He finds his doll eyes looking at him, thoughtful and scared and thankful and suddenly Bucky feels chocked up again so he takes his face between his hands and presses his lips to the blonde’s forehead and tastes the clean water there.

After quickly washing his own hair under Bucky’s interested eyes Gale drags them out. For himself he pulls on a bathrobe before taking using one of the towels for Bucky’s curls and then the other for delicately tracing down his torso between all the marks of violence. Bucky stays silent even when he starts to disinfect the cuts, giving away his exhauston completely, but the silence is soft like a protective cushion between them and the world.

Once he’s happy Gale takes him by the hand and pulls him after himself. Bucky’s back hits the mattress and he suddenly feels all the tiredness at once at the soft embrace of the clean sheets, and then immediately after wide awake again as Gale’s thighs settle on both sides of his lap, hands automatically coming to rest lazily on his hips as Gale leans over him on all fours to press airy pecks all over his abused face — his temples, cheekbones, eyelides, side of his nose, the sharpest edge of his jawline — as if trying to force a protective spell, or a blessing, upon his skin.

”Sweetheart,” Bucky murmurs dreamily as the other keeps going down from his face, pressing his face into his neck and collarbones and inhaling him like an addict looking for his fix. Gale hums in answer absentmindedly and kisses his way further down. He kisses each of the bruises softly, nibbing at the parts of his skin that are not injured, letting the skin go up and down with his teeth, never biting hard enough to actually hurt but leaving his little signatures everywhere on his abs, navel, hip-joints.

Bucky’s hands have found reign in his hair at some point, long fingers twisted in wet strands and pulling just a little when Gale breathes against the base of cock, pressing his lips there and giving the sensitive skin between his dick and balls like it was something sacred. Bucky hisses in want as Gale guides both of his knees over Gale’s shoulders when he gives more admiring kisses to his manhood, asking to be pressed down to the bed with Bucky, to be let to be lost in their pleasure for just a moment.

Gale goes down on him like he wants to regain him, almost like he wants to hurt him too to replace memories of everyone else hurting him. Bucky groans as his throat clicks when he gags on him, and then moans immediately after, doing it again and again. It’s lewd and dirty and perfect. John can do nothing else but take it and whisper soft praise, ”So good for me darling”, ”Just like that”.

Gale pulls back to breathe properly, and Bucky drags him sitting up by his hair, making Gale whine with a wide smile on his face. ”Show-off,” Bucky accuses him quietly, with a fond little smile, their dicks rubbing together as Gale sits on his lap again. The blondie laughs into the kiss as Bucky turns them around, backing Gale up until the top of his hair is touching the metal frame of the bed.

They stare at each other there for a moment, Bucky taking his time now to look at him, pressing the image to his mind for moments when the warmth of the younger is just a distant memory. Gale bites his lip again, but this time with a happy grin, as Bucky bullies his thighs apart with his own and then presses down on him until his calves are trapped between them. ”Are you sure?” Bucky scoffs, shaking his head. ”Sweetheart. The day when I respond to that ’you know what, I’m good actually’ I want you to end my life with a tool of your choice.” Gale makes a disapproving clicking sound with his tongue but reaches to play with Bucky’s curls again with his left hand, softness in his eyes that makes him look younger. Pain swirls through John at the sight. ”I’m really okay just having you close-” Bucky shuts him up by licking at his lips. ”Shh. Let me, baby.” Gale falls silent, looking up at him with stars in his eyes, and it scares Bucky he knows how much he trusts him. ”Please, let me,” he whispers against his lips again. Gale nods.

John takes one hand to each of his own and presses them gently to the headboard. A soflty whispered ”stay” and then ”good boy” as Gale wraps his slender fingers around the metal there makes the blonde’s breath hitch. John keeps his hands there for a bit before running them down his arms, lips locked in a passionate kiss, the little noises Gale makes into it driving him wild. His own cock is aching and Gale’s drying saliva is cooling and making him extra sensitive, but he still takes his time prepping Gale carefully, taking care of him like he took care of him earlier in the bathroom.

He pulls his three fingers out when Gale’s sounds get loud and keening despite his best efforts of muffling them — there’s no need to be quiet here, but old habits die hard. He lubes himself up and sits up straighter on his knees between Gale’s legs. Gale is breathing hard, chest heaving between them, his hands still around the metal. John leans down to kiss him to not tell him how much he loves him and then pushes into him as Gale’s moans fill his lungs.

He can’t keep kissing him for long, the sudden need to take him hard overwhelming and immediate. There’s spit connecting their heart-shaped lips as Bucky presses his hands on the mattress on both sides of Gale’s head and puts his back into it, his pain, his frustration, and Gale throws his head to the side and smiles, and Bucky’s heart aches again so he fucks him harder, drinking in the happy sighs with his eyes and ears alike.

He notices that Gale’s arms are shaking with the effort of keeping them against the frame so he slows down for a moment, reaching for his hands again and carefully pulling them towards the core of them, waiting for Gale to have them wrapped around his neck before he drives into him slower but deeper. Gale’s gasping for breath with each thrust, his eyes closed and face focused on pleasure, and Bucky would like nothing more than to drag this out until the morning but he knows he needs to rest, and he’d rather fall asleep with Gale wrapped around him than see him leave at dawn to return for the shadows assigned to him.

Gale opens his eyes and they stare at each other, Bucky momentarily posessed by the hazy blue that looks up at him in melancholy, in need, in hope, in love. Bucky is immediately resigned, he wants to tear up his chest and stop feeling or stop the time and stay like this forever. He will give Gale anything he needs, anytime he can.

”In me,” Gale pleads him, and Bucky presses his lips to his forcefully now, overcome by the image of Gale pulling on his clothes and going back to his betrothed with Bucky still dripping from him. He whines aloud at the thought and gives it to him harder, better, louder, and Gale murmurs praise and gratitude into his open mouth before throwing his head back and coming between them. Bucky follows him there and then the room is silent again, both of them breathing hard, the sweat cooling between them. Gale has hidden his face to Bucky’s hair, away from the world, his arms hugging tightly around his neck, wanting to morph into this moment and only breathe the cheap hotel shampoo for the rest of his days. Bucky mouths at his neck, yearning to mark the pure skin that’s not his to claim, at least if he cares about keeping his Gale alive.

Bucky turns them carefully to their sides, slipping away from him. Gale feels suddenly cold and pushes himself closer so he can stay away from the room and the world beyond it for a moment more. Bucky makes a soothing cooing sound for he can’t say to him anything to make it better, and hugs him thight when he feels the first sob force it’s way out of his lover. He’ll hold him close for as long as he can, caress the perfect valleys of his back, and pray they both live to have this fleeting moment again.

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

Humbly here to request my weekly sentences :)

🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟

❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️ I am SO intrigued by this idea

YAY!

45 for 🧟:

---

“It looked like a singular flashlight,” Maddie explains. 

“Maybe it’s just someone looking around,” Hen says. 

Because she hopes. Because she worries about the alternative. Because she needs for there not to be a threat to her son.

“Right, yeah,” Maddie nods. “Like a scavenger. Or a traveler. I’ve been there.”

“We don’t know,” Bobby decides. “And we’re not going to panic until we do. A handful of us can go scouting tomorrow.”

Hen is almost certain that includes her. Good. She’ll make sure Karen stays behind with Denny, where it’s safe. 

“Sounds like a plan,” Karen says. 

“I’ll take the first stakeout shift,” Bobby announces.

“I’ll join you,” Athena offers. 

“I appreciate that,” Bobby replies. 

And that’s that. It’s settled. They have a plan. 

Having a plan always makes Hen feel better. Not totally better, but less bad. The worst is being in a predicament and not knowing what next move to make. At least this isn’t that. Yet. 

But, still… Hen would be lying if she said she gets much sleep that night. 

September 8th, 2018

Denny is overflowing with joy in the morning. A few days of playing with boys his own age and he’s pretty much descended into being a total rascal. But compared to a child that only had adults for company and seemed a bit too old for his age, Hen will take a bit of  mischief and silliness any day. 

“What if something terrible happens?” Hen asks her wife quietly as they get ready for the day. “Denny is finally getting to be a normal kid.”

“I don’t know if this is normal,” Karen says, looking across the room to where Denny and Christopher are playing Connect 4. “But, yeah… I know. I can’t stop thinking, Eddie left his kid here. He trusted Maddie and all of us. Now what if when he gets back…”

God, Hen hadn’t even considered that. 

“I hope they get back soon,” Hen mumbles. “We could use numbers and weapons on our side, just in case.”

---

60 for ❄️:

---

Basically, Eddie can’t be blamed for any of this. He’s free of guilt. He didn’t mean to… Well, do anything. 

Really, all he wanted to do was be less of a fucking mess. 

i.

“I think group therapy would benefit you,” Frank says, one session in late June. 

Christopher is still gone and Gerrard is still captain and life still pretty much sucks. Every day just feels like an endless loop of fucking shit. 

“You firing me, Frank?” Eddie asks. “Took you longer than expected, actually.”

Eddie’s been doing that a lot lately. The whole sarcasm thing. More than usual. And not just to Frank. He’s even begun to make tiny, biting comments in Buck’s direction. Which is completely unfair of him because all Buck is doing is supporting him. Just… Well, sometimes Eddie doesn’t know what else to say when… When things are brought up. 

Frank smiles patiently. “I think group therapy would benefit you, in addition to our sessions together.”

Eddie blinks. “Twice the amount of therapy? Extra people? I don’t know.”

Frank nods. “Yeah, it’s not most people’s favorite idea at first. But the feedback is usually pretty good.”

“Why would I need a group?” Eddie asks. “These problems… They’re pretty specific to me.”

Though, if Frank can point him in the direction of a support group for people who have encountered eerie clones of their dead spouses, Eddie will shut his damn mouth and get going. If this is a recurring thing for people, that’s just insane. Eddie will gladly join that class action lawsuit against god or the universe or whatever Buck would interpret it as. 

“Not all of what we’ve talked about is specific to you, Eddie,” Frank says. “A lot of people struggle with-”

“But isn’t everything with Chris and Kim and all that the most pressing thing?” Eddie interrupts. “That’s what I need to solve first.”

“It all helps, Eddie. We’ve talked about this. You being in a better, more open and accepting place with yourself? That will help with the rest.”

Eddie groans a little. It all sounds so counterintuitive. Even though Eddie knows he’s probably right. Why should he get to work on accepting and loving himself, when the consequences of his actions are still hurting his son? Keeping him away from home? He shouldn’t get to be happy right now. 

But the thing is, Eddie made a promise. To Buck, first. The night Christopher left. More than that, though, to himself. He’s going to trust the process. Therapy. The whole nine yards. He’s not going to let this destroy him. 

[co-mixed]

X-Men '97: Beyond Expectations

Let’s be honest, who was ready for this? 

Personally, I didn’t have many expectations. I knew it was X-men and I knew I’d love it probably no matter what. I had a fear it might be a little too clean and knowing full well what the comics are, making it child-appropriate wasn’t an ideal option. Should I even say the words “pleasantly surprised” at this point? They don’t cover it. 

X-Men ‘97 did something that’s been missing ever since the MCU started. It built the X-men fan community back up, brought in new fans, encouraged people to take a look at the X-titles again. We finally get to namedrop our favorite mutants, share ridiculous facts from their past, and yes, remember things like X-Men Evolution and Wolverine and the X-men. But then the show also showed us how heavily emotional and deep cartoons can be. 

Okay, enough vague statements, and no more avoiding spoilers.

The show really relies on the previously established lore with Charles being taken off-world to Shi’ar and the X-men left under Scott’s leadership. Or so he thinks. Right off the bat in the first episode, we get an epic X-fight like we’ve never seen and a cliffhanger with Magneto showing up. Not much of a shocker and yet, we’ve never seen the movies dare to do that (or anything that strays too far from Phoenix). Whenever that happens, Magneto trying to abandon his murdery radical ways, it always comes down to his clash with Charles. They really manage to make their decades-long disagreement everybody else’s problem. X-men usually pay the price. 

This time though, you finally see the creators working with the comics. We get so many storylines adapted in the span of 10 episodes, it’s unbelievable. That actually does follow the tradition set up by TAS. Only it’s been years, hence more stories and newer, harsher ones. 

To be honest, I never even imagined Genosha being adapted. Not just because it’s a heavy arc but because it’s just so obvious: when you mention Genosha you state the fact. We know what their goal is. It’s removing any ambiguity and allowing no misinterpretations of what the X-men are really and have always been about. So it’s a statement for sure. And I couldn’t be happier they finally made it. Correction, I could be happier if they hadn’t killed off Gambit. We’ll get back to that. 

So yeah, we got Genosha, OZT, Inferno, and Lifedeath (aside from minor elements and arcs I can’t particularly point out at the moment). So this show went to the depth of what makes X-men X-men, they took the personal arcs like Lifedeath or Inferno, the ones that focused on character journeys, and really showed us who the people are behind these stories. That’s mostly  Claremont’s legacy since both stories were from his era and it was his thing to take mutants through their personal hell. Bot arcs were compressed, of course, but the essence remained the same. Which, again is the only goal of an adaptation anyway. So some metaphors had to be sacrificed but ultimately, they just give you a chance to relive it through comics if you’re into it.

But then they hit us with big events like Genosha and OZT. They absolutely go as epic as any movie, because remember how you felt after ep.5? If you’re anything like me, you were devastated and if you’re a Gambit fan, you were shocked too. And this is one of the things that they didn’t just put aside and ignore, something that movies never focused on: the emotions. Throughout the show, the characters say several times that they’re a family. But we actually see that in the friendship between Storm and Jean (which come on, it’s been a long freaking time coming!), or Morph and Wolverine (that one resembles Wolverine’s friendship with Nightcrawler in the comics). But then in the love and drama between Scott and Jean (and Madelyne! And Logan! And probably Emma one day!), Storm and Forge, or Rogue and Gambit (and Magneto!).

Love and friendship - the genuine connections that make you care about the characters and how someone’s death or disappearance or even inner turmoil affects you. We see these things through their reactions, so for them to feel true, we have to see those connections. And here we finally do. Just like we do in the comics. I hope the eventual movie screenwriters keep that in mind because that’s the only way to build an X-men story, brick by brick. 

Look at the way Roro and Jean are cheering each other on, with mind and weather, and then when Phoenix shows up. 

X-men are a superhero soap opera and we all know that. And ffs let’s never again pretend like it isn’t. 

The politics. Now if you’re one of those “keep the politics away from my comics/movies/cartoons” types, X-men are not for you. X-men ‘97 even more so, because this show is all politics. I mean hello, Genosha? OZT? Bastion, sentinels, hate groups? We are even finally calling out Shi’ar! Which I love. We’ve been looking at them through ally glasses since more often than not they play on the side of the X-men. But really, in terms of intergalactic politics, they are no better than Kree or Skrulls (not the cozy ones from the MCU). They can get pretty mean. In one of his finer moments, mainly because it allowed him to rest comfortably on his high horse, Charles points that out. Even explains the short and easy-to-understand version of what being an empire means. But as he does that, unfortunately, Genosha is under attack. 

We give him shit for ditching his family like that but really, he just relied on his pal Magneto to keep it together. And he would’ve too, had his gloved hand not been forced by the likes of Val, Trask, and the evil droid that is Bastion. 

Here’s where X-men ‘97 do the absolute most – they mix and match stories, piling them on to absolutely overwhelm the heroes. To keep everyone preoccupied and focused on their piece of the drama cake to sneak in a shuttering final forte chord. 

And Genosha ain’t even that. 

Let me be corny for a moment there, but it’s probably one of THE moments for every fan, when after episode 5 we were warned that the best is yet to come. And we kept asking how? How do you top that? And we saw today (5.15.) because holy shit, this show raised the bar. 

We got teamwork. Really, one of the perfect elements of this show is the characters’ powers. The limitless force with which they jump into a battle. We knew it at “Give them the forecast” really. Because we’ve never before seen Storm at the height of her power, with all she can and has done in the comics. Right then and there we knew what we were in for. But then, the rest of that, or any other fight sequence was everything you could hope for. There wasn’t a single one you would wanna miss. Powers depicted as they were always meant to and amazing teamwork. That was one of the best elements borrowed from the recent comics. Recent because while they’ve been working as a team since forever, it was Krakoa that really emphasized how powerful mutant circuits can be.

Thanks to that, we got to see a showcase of creative use of abilities. Beast using his knowledge to his advantage, Morph using their power to turn into everyone who’s anyone - I mean they gave us so many little fun cameos, even though every time you had to take a double look and ask wait, Warren’s here? Psylocke showed up? Or ehhh Hulk? That’s very X-men. The characters have fun with their powers too, with the team landing in the first episode or Ororo flying around when she got her powers back (this ain’t about Forge :D). And then there are devastating displays of power like Gambit charging the Wild Sentinel (still not over it) or Magneto turning off the lights. Of course, in any battle you have to keep things interesting, which is why they don’t just let the heroes use their ultimate ability from the get-go and be done with the whole thing. The baddies also have to surprise you with being harder and harder to defeat.

Speaking of surprises, the fact that all the stories have been stitched together like a quilt makes every turn unexpected. I mean you can predict some things and chances are, the better you remember the comics, the more things you can get right. But what’s the fun in that? They don’t simply adapt arcs, they add and remove crucial elements that make it into something new. And that new is always unpredictable. Like take Genosha - Bastion was behind it instead of Cassandra. While Charles was in space, she wasn’t after him, the Shi’ar politicians, however, were. Or the whole ordeal with Maddie - Scott didn’t stand a chance there. Really, no matter how you spin that story, he can’t get out of it looking good. But they did their best and it worked. 

Then again, these are the things that make adaptations work and this is what the MCU is so good with. Civil War was hella different from the comics and it’s still a fan favorite. 

And as if all that was somehow not enough, the show is so quotable. It has all those little callbacks to previous episodes or TAS or even the movies, clever writing, and beautiful lines that stay with you for weeks and probably even forever. All the things about chosen family – tell me you didn’t tear up or straight up cry because that’s pretty much what I did. And yeah the first time you’re watching to find out what happens. The second — you really live through all the emotions. Along with the characters because they so do live them.  

There is so much X-men lore. You can read them like obsessed (which I often do) and still have so many stories to go through. Anyway, X-Men ‘97 finally flipped the page from the stories we know well and picked a new evil, building a new arc with him at the center. 

And then, the details in general. How well the animation is done and how tiny elements you notice help them build the narrative. I’ve been thinking about it since the first episode when I saw the look between Storm and Rogue before the team landed. In that one look, they agreed on a landing strategy they probably trained time and time again in the Danger Room. Similarly, the sneaky sideyes and looks, just pay attention to them when you rewatch (and I know you will), cause the details just make the whole experience even better. All reactions are awesome in this show like Ororo hearing about Forge’s disastrous neutralizer technology and calling an epic thunder. That’s pretty much how the characters stop being 2d even when all they are meant to be is 2d.

Did I mention the soundtrack? Pretty much a masterpiece, right? It feels epic and grandiose and in many ways, it’s because of the music. It’s obvious things it’s still so easy to simply forget to mention it. You pay attention to the story and the visuals but they are tied together by the sound. And it’s most noticeable in the Wolverine/Nightcrawler fight with Prime Sentinels or when Ororo flies around, or when Cable, Jean, and Scott jump into that epic family fight. Breathtaking. 

A big part of this show is about family. The kind that supports you and stands by you. You know, the opposite of Nina DaCosta! It’s always touching too because no other team is like that. You don’t get this benefit of the doubt with the Avengers and FF are actually related. You only get that with the X-Men if you’re willing to share the dream. 

I’m not going into the dream though, been there, done that. But I do want to talk about the finale. 

As many have predicted, we did get a cliffhanger. As if we wouldn’t have come back, pah-lease! But we’re obviously back to Apocalypse and this time he’s gonna mess up with several timelines at once. Now what exactly are we getting - I wouldn’t dare theorize. All I can think about right now is… okay, we’re probably getting some resurrections, some Stryfe, and once again, I’m hoping for New Mutants (even though the only new face I spotted was Dust and she’s from an entirely different team.)

Also, we see a wider universe: Cap and Iron Man, Black Panther (where again did Storm end up ;)), Cloak and Dagger, Daredevil, Strange, Fantastic Four, Spider-Man. If we ever have crossovers… 

Still, it’s been amazing and it’s now forever with us. 

I might be biased, no, I am most certainly biased but it’s the best animated show I have ever seen and I am ecstatic that it’s about the team I’ve loved my entire life.

[mana-jjk]

y’all walk with me in the five minutes i have left of free time ;;

tw: suicide attempt, parental abuse

toge who has been an idol since he was a child x new and upcoming idol yuuta

• toge who grew up in a famous family who immediately pushed him to the limelight since the moment he was born

• he was one of the youngest child idols at the time, he’s always had a voice that captured attention and was exploited for it.

• he spent his entire childhood isolated from others, homeschooled, no friends, no choice in what he got to do or who he got to talk to, and under the scrutiny of the public’s eye

• his parents even forced him to take specific medications to keep his voice from changing, they withheld affection but paraded him around like a prize dog.

• everything changed after his suicide attempt.

• he woke up in a hospital for the first time, voice gone from his attempt, and lifeless with disappointment.

• his parents were furious at the loss of his voice and the attention he drew to them, to the point where they couldn’t even disown him without public scrutiny.

• years go by and toge remains in the spotlight for his looks and dancing ability. he’s often involved in movies/series that involve mute characters, but he’s far from the popularity he used to have.

• it’s at one of the fan meet and greets before his attempt that yuuta meets toge for the first time.

• yuuta had grown up completely normal, and had watched a few shows that featured toge. he’d always been awed by him, there was such an untouchable aura about him that always captured everyone’s attention.

• when yuuta hears that there’s a meet and greet, he doesn’t even hesitate. yet when he’s finally there, naturally he freezes up.

• the security is rushing him, his hands are sweaty, and there’s a growing line behind him. part of yuuta is ready to run far away, yet it’s toge who waves the security away. who smiles at him kindly, takes his hand gently, and talks to him patiently.

• yuuta blurts out that someday he wants to shine as bright as him, and that’s the only moment toge’s eyes dim. but the shorter boy smiles regardless, and on his card, he writes, “i hope you shine brighter than the stars in the sky. i’ll be waiting for your debut! - your first fan, toge.”

• a few years later, the news breaks that one of the biggest child stars has just attempted to take their life.

• for the first time, toge seemed human to him. he’d always had impressive acting ability, and his glow on stage when he danced never wavered, but his eyes were what gave him away. even looking back to their first meeting, they seemed so sad that he couldn’t bring himself to look away.

• so for years, yuuta works hard with his childhood friend as his manager to rise in the ranks. he gets his big break when the biggest recording studio in the country discovers him and sends him an offer to sponsor him with a new, male idol group.

• he doesn’t even hesitate to say yes and soon he’s meeting his fellow members, megumi and yuuji.

• gojo, the owner of the studio, lets him in on a little secret, he’s trying to recruit toge too.

• cue yuuta being interviewed and always hinting at his celebrity crush, unknowing that toge has been watching the group since it was announced.

• toge at this time has mainly switched to acting roles, where he meets maki on-set of a movie. and panda who works as a camera technician. they’re his best friends, and he’s finally out of his parents house, but still feels compelled to cater to the public. yet not enough to join a full-blown idol group.

• the black-haired boy who sings his heart out on stage seems familiar, but he just can’t put his finger on it.

are you still walking with me because i’m kind of sprinting now <3 i just think toge deserves to be dazzled by idol yuuta who still fumbles his way talking to him shyly up close, i love that for him

please picture yuuta pushing his hair back and winking on stage to toge in the crowd, turning around to go to his dressing room and immediately collapsing into a blushing, pathetic pile of mush.

toge, hiding in the crowd in disguise, red-faced and wondering when his shy fan turned into a heartthrob who could flirt

i always say this but feel free to ask me any questions about any au’s or works i have, i will absolutely avoid my homework to answer you <3

[heyclickadee]

One part of “Aftermath” I don’t think I’ll ever get over is that Hunter, Wrecker, Echo, Tech, and Omega were on their way to get Crosshair when Crosshair walked into that hangar. The way we talk about it in the fandom is as though they left Crosshair behind in that first episode so they could rescue Omega, as though they traded him for her, but that’s. Not. What. Happened.

They go back to Kamino to grab Omega despite the risk, because they think she belongs with them, yes, but also because they’re still confident. They haven’t failed a mission yet. And —and this is important—because she said she wanted to go with them, and they take that into account.

And, of course, they immediately get captured, taken to the brig, they find Omega, Crosshair fires off about following orders—his new favorite hobby that he only picked up in the last week(1)—the guards come to take Crosshair away, and Hunter puts himself between Crosshair and the guards and says No. Absolutely not. We stay together, we’re a set, do not separate, and then—

—Crosshair gets up and leaves. And the rest of the batch probably doesn’t fully understand why.

Now, I personally think that Crosshair’s decision to leave was multifaceted. I do think the chip programming had something to do with it. It’s telling him that Hunter’s made bad call after bad call since Kaller, and that the smart thing to do would be to just comply with whatever the empire wants. He’s also deeply frustrated with the rest of his squad, though he probably doesn’t know why he suddenly disagrees with them so much. And I also think that Crosshair didn’t want anyone else in his family to get hurt. He’s got his hackles raised and he’s ready to pounce when that one guard hits Hunter in the gut; he knows that they’re going to take him one way or another, so best to do it in a way that doesn’t end with the rest of his squad getting shot. All of that is in play in Crosshair’s decision to get up and go with the guards willingly, but all the rest of the batch knows is that he does it.

It’s even possible that their initial read on Crosshair’s decision is mostly in line with the last thing I listed—that Crosshair does it to keep the rest of them from getting hurt. It’s also possible that their read on it was that Crosshair was upset. But it probably doesn’t matter. The first thing—the first thing out of Hunter’s mouth when they break out of the brig is, “We need to find out where they took Crosshair.” The only reason they go to the hangar at all is to grab their gear so they have a better chance of getting him without dying on the way. They suit up, Hunter tells Tech to get the ship ready for a speedy getaway, and no sooner does he add that the rest of them are going to get Crosshair that Crosshair walks in. When Crosshair walks in—what he sees of them, and what they see of him informs every single interaction they have through the rest of the series.

First, what they see of him. Crosshair’s chip is activated. He’s just been electroshocked into submission and had that chip’s programming ramped up to twenty. He’s not in control of his thoughts or actions, but the only two people who have any inkling that that’s the case are Tech, who’s powering up the ship and not in the room, and Omega, who is a Child and about to be shot at for the first time in her life. The rest of them have no idea. All they know is that Crosshair is standing there wearing a new set of armor, leading a new squad, with a new rank, telling them to stand down and looking oh so pleased with himself as he clarifies that that is, in fact, an order. At the time, while Crosshair is monologuing about how they need to come quietly and how Hunter can’t see the bigger picture, it must look to them like the reason Crosshair left in that earlier scene was because he wanted to leave the squad. We, the audience, know that’s not true, but the rest of the batch doesn’t, especially given what they’re seeing at the time.

And then Crosshair starts shooting. It looks to them like he’s trying to kill them, and its not just empty. As much as Crosshair surely doesn’t want to, as much as Crosshair probably hates himself for this later on when he’s more in control, he shoots Wrecker. And unlike earlier in the episode, when Wrecker got shot during the battle simulation, Wrecker isn’t able to eventually get back up and keep fighting. Wrecker’s down. It’s all Hunter and Echo can do to just drag him onto the ship, and the only reason they even manage that is because Omega manages to shoot Crosshair’s rifle out of his hand; they don’t have the manpower to subdue Crosshair and drag him on board as well, not without potentially getting themselves or Crosshair (or Wrecker) killed. They don’t leave Crosshair behind for Omega’s sake or because they got in one argument and wrote him off here. They leave him because, in that moment, it looks for all the world like Crosshair does not want to go with them, like he suddenly wants them dead or captured, and they’re just trying to get out of there alive.

And what he sees of them…gah. There’s a split second, blink-and-you-miss-it moment when Crosshair first walks in, sees them, and he looks terrified. He knows what he’s about to do, and he hates it, and he probably doesn’t know WHY he hates it, because his programming has to be screaming at him that what he’s about to do is right. Good soldiers follow orders. But the part of Crosshair that’s still himself, the part that’s still aware, still able to differentiate his own mind from the chip’s programming here in the early days after order 66, that part is yelling back that he doesn’t want to hurt them, but he can’t stop it. He doesn’t have that capacity. And that has to rip him apart here. The things he must have had to tell himself later just to cope.

But also—what he sees when he walks in? He sees the Marauder powering up. He sees everyone suiting up and grabbing their gear. He has to think—the thought has to cross his mind—that they’re leaving without him. And they’re not, they were literally on their way to rescue him, that was the next move, that was the plan, the only reason they don’t go through with it is because he walks in, starts shooting, and Wrecker almost dies, but Crosshair doesn’t know that. He wasn’t there to hear Hunter say that was the plan, no more than the rest of the batch was there so see what Nala Se and Tarkin did to him.

The worst part? None of them know about the parts they missed yet(2). Hunter, Wrecker, Echo, Tech, and Omega still don’t know what happened to Crosshair after the guards took him away. Crosshair still doesn’t know the others were coming for him. And I’m really curious about what’s going to happen if, and maybe when, they all get that context.

1. “Aftermath” takes place over at least several days, meaning Crosshair’s chip has been partially active and working its way into his thought processes the entire time.

2. I also think that part of the reason why things between Hunter and Crosshair are so broken is not because either (or neither) of them is willing to see things from the other’s point of view, but because both of them understands the other’s point of view a little too well, but in a way that lacks necessary context. Hunter probably understands that Crosshair has every reason to hate him, every reason to feel bitter and betrayed, and, honestly, Hunter probably agrees with Crosshair in that regard, and hates himself because of it. But Hunter also doesn’t know that Crosshair was never trying to kill them of his own free will and that he was therefore never bitter enough to actually want to hurt them. And Crosshair probably completely understands that Hunter has every reason to distrust him and to have completely given up hope that he might come home, and he probably hates himself for everything the chip made him do. But Crosshair doesn’t know that his family was, in fact, coming back for him and that Hunter is furious with himself for having left Crosshair behind. If they both ever had those gaps filled in they’d maybe both realize that, for all their hurt and misunderstanding, neither of them has ever hated the other. I desperately need them to sit down and talk. And then hug. And to break down weeping. Give me that catharsis I am BEGGING THIS DAMN SHOW.

[shostakobitchh]

Chapter 3: behind the wool

Ariel falls asleep quickly that night — too quickly. 

Shouldn’t have. It’s a mistake. 

She’d wanted to lay there and digest what her father had said, but the hour had been late and her father had sat with her a while after, and she hadn’t been able to resist the pull of sleep this time. Ariel is ninety-three percent sure he used some sort of wordless spell to put her out — an easy way to get him out of their conversation. He’d cheated. 

Her dreams are disjointed. Ariel hears things she doesn’t remember, doesn’t know if they’re real or an echo of a memory. Bright colors bouncing off walls in uncomfortable darkness — a ragged breath in her ear as shouts ring out from below. The floor shakes beneath her and when it stills, she can hear a high, cruel voice cut through the dark like a comet.

"Severus," the voice is cold, a shard of ice in her dream, "you cannot possibly be this foolish.” 

“My Lord — please.” Her father's bellows are raw with desperation and rage, a caged beast clawing for escape. “I will do anything —”

"Your life, Severus? A fair trade for the Mudblood and the child?" The high, cruel voice laughs. It reverberates off the unseen walls of her dream, a sound that makes it hard for Ariel to breathe. “No, you see, this is a particular torment I have been savoring for you. You will listen — listen as I rip them from your world, as was always intended.” 

“No — my Lord — take me instead, I beg you —” 

The high, cruel voice cackles again, and it’s like a dagger sliding through her chest. “You overestimate your worth. No — you have chosen betrayal. I think it is fair that you witness the consequences. Incarcerous!” 

She wakes to the sound of her name. 

“Ariel.” 

Ariel — Ariel look at me, her Mum had whispered in her ear, then, her arms tight like a vise.  

“Ariel, wake up.” 

She sits up quick — so quick she makes herself dizzy. Straining, Ariel keeps still — listens — her heart pounding in her ears. 

It comes. “Ariel.” 

The closet is open, just a crack, just as she’d left it before. From the crack, there is a dim, green light, so faint that Ariel can’t tell if it’s her eyes playing tricks on her or if it’s really there. 

“Mum?” Ariel throws off her blankets and scampers to the edge of her bed. “Is that you?” 

“Yes, my girl,” and Mum says it the way Dad does, sometimes, with a fierce tenderness, like he’s almost proud — my girl. “It’s me.”

She throws on her bedside lamp, the room engulfed in a soft, yellow glow. 

Ariel’s heart is a fireworks show. “Where have you been?” she demands. “Where did you go? I’ve been waiting for you! Dad wouldn’t believe me, and I waited and you left.” 

"I’m sorry, darling," Mum sighs, the green light pulsating softly as Ariel draws closer. "But I’m here now.” 

"But why?" she presses, her small hands clenched into fists at her side. “Don’t you miss us?”

I miss you, I’m sorry you died because of me.  

"Of course she does," The green light blinks, like a heartbeat catching its breath. “Why wouldn’t she?” 

"Then why didn't you come back?" Ariel's voice trembles with desperate anger and grief.

The voice sighs gently, a sound like wind whispering through the leaves. "Because she wasn’t ready yet.” 

Ariel is about to ask what that means when she pauses — actually listens to what her mother is saying, because — she — she wasn’t ready yet — not — 

She wasn’t ready yet —

Her mother is dead. Her mother is dead and no spell can wake the dead, and even if it could, Ariel knows her mother would never leave her again. This one did. This one left and doesn’t seem to care — 

Because it’s not Mum. 

Ariel swallows, hard. She counts backwards from ten, and then counts backwards from five, because she is very much trying not to come completely apart, and the darkness is thickening like soup, its tendrils reaching towards the bed from the closet. Ariel can’t even see the door to her bedroom anymore. 

“Why are you talking like that?” Ariel asks quietly, the unease seeping in deep, mingling with the growing pang of doubt in her gut.

A soft chuckle echoes from the closet, a sound that lifts every hair on Ariel’s arms. “Like what, darling?"

“That… that’s not how my mum talks,” Ariel's lip wobbles as she fights to keep the tears at bay. “You — you’re talking like you’re someone else.”

The green light flickers erratically. "Well, perhaps it has been so long that… you've forgotten."

That — that makes Ariel angry. 

“No.” Ariel snarls. "No, I remember everything about my Mum.”

“Do you?” Not-Mum asks, and it sounds like it’s laughing at her, now. “What do you remember, Ariel? Do you remember the look on her face when she realized she was going to die?” 

It’s a wonder Ariel’s heart doesn’t give out right then and there. It feels like it’s breaking — 

The green light in the closet goes out. There’s a long, rattling breath that fills the room up up up —  

"She wishes things could be different." Not-Mum’s voice curdles at the end, like bad milk. 

A jolt of something so cold, it borders on painful, spasms down Ariel’s spine.

[reslari]

Every Great One Loses Its Child and Yearns for a Surrogate Mother

So here I was watching one of the dozens of Bloodborne lore analysis/plot breakdown videos I’ve seen in my life, when the producer of the video made an offhanded comment that lodged firmly within my brain and got my thoughts running a thousand miles an hour. It’s funny, in all the videos and text lore posts I’ve seen, I can not recall anyone positing that the “surrogate” may be referring to a surrogate mother. Oh, I know there is someone out there that’s said it before, I am hardly trying to take credit for the idea, but I thought I’d do a little thought experiment of what it could potentially mean that the term “a surrogate” refers to a surrogate mother.

Now, of course, the obvious answer to why most people don’t think of it that way is because the item description specifically references children: Every Great One loses its child, and yearns for a surrogate. The context informs you that it’s talking about a surrogate child.

But what if it’s not?

Every Great One loses its child and yearns for a surrogate (mother).

Every Great One loses its child. They’re beings of a higher plane of existence, with nebulous physical forms. Some of them don’t even exist in physical form at all (that we know of), so it makes a sort of sense: They can’t carry a child to term. Their bodies aren’t built for it anymore. Maybe they never really were. So the mundane, physical, even bestial idea of pregnancy is beneath such beings and their dreamy ascended plane.

Yet, even still, they yearn for children.

So they look back to the plane they left behind, the plane they once inhabited and bred with the Pthumerians upon, and they find the humans. They’re fertile, they’re tied to the waking, physical world, and, most importantly: they’re trying to make contact.

I recall once that Miyazaki said in an interview that the implication of the Great Ones is that the more advanced a civilization is, the lower the birth rate. What is more advanced than the very Great Ones? But this seems contradictory: If their society is so advanced that they no longer feel the need to reproduce, why then would “every” Great One lose its child and yearn for another? Why do they even care?

Unless they’re simply not capable of reproducing anymore on their own, despite wanting to. The higher plane they ascended to cannot support the creation of new life. The changes to their bodies preclude them from having these children. Their nigh-on immortality means there is no reason for them to want successors or children to carry on their legacies or family bloodlines, and yet, they yearn for that which they cannot have anymore regardless. Such a simple thing, as well: While there is variance in individual members, reproduction is an extremely common occurrence everywhere in the waking world, and is typically easy to do.

Great Ones are too advanced for simple asexual reproduction: They’re far more than single-cell organisms, so they can’t just clone themselves into a second being. Further, even if they were able to form a zygote without input from a second member of their species, they’d still need to form eggs or a placenta - to create amniotic fluid, the sea within - to nurture the growing fetus until it is ready to join the world, and that’s where they’re getting stuck. They cannot nurture these children.

But the humans have great fecundity, comparatively, and there are a number of them trying to contact the Great Ones. Just like the Pthumerians before, they’re perfectly suited to carry these children the Great Ones want to term.

Whether the humans want to, or not. 

I’ve seen some arguments going around the internet lately - and I’m sure it’s not a new argument, but it’s had some time in the limelight in previous weeks - about pushing to outlaw surrogacy, because it is commodifying women’s bodies. Consider that connection to the game, as the Great Ones use the humans for their own wants. Not even a need - after all, as I said, there is no reason for the Great Ones to even want to reproduce in the first place, the typical “ensuring the survival of a species by its continuation” instinct shouldn’t even apply here. Yet want to they do. They yearn for children. And they yearn for the people who can carry them, because they cannot any longer. It may as well be surrogacy tourism, to an entirely other plane of existence.

In exchange? The Great Ones have no use for traditional currency, so they can only guess what the humans would want in turn. Maybe they don’t care about that, either, but their mark does come in the form of wisdom, knowledge, the “Eldritch Truth”. Wisdom that the vast majority of humans cannot even understand or fathom, because they’re such “lesser” creatures than the Great Ones, and they don’t even speak the Great Ones’ language. Wisdom they’ll tear themselves apart over the interpretation of because multiple different schools of thought are going to pop up over the scraps the Great Ones leave behind.

What of the humans that don’t even want their bodies used in such a way?

That’s what makes this even more horrifying: I don’t think the Great Ones even care. They can hardly communicate with the humans. All the humans in Yharnam seem to want to contact the Great Ones, and there are some that find it wonderful, find it an honor. More, in fact, than ones that don’t. To the Great Ones, it likely seems the conditions of their exchange are universally accepted, even if that is far from the truth. Then, we are left with situations like Annalise and Imposter Iosefka actively welcoming a pregnancy by a Great One, but Arianna actively abhorring it.

So let us Teal Deer a longwinded explanation of how this can be applied:

Kos was pregnant when she was found washed up on the shore, or killed, and it doesn’t really matter where one stands on this idea. We know for a fact that the huge, skeletal, YEEEOW-ing creature we fight as a boss is a projection, or a form that the enraged Orphan wanted to take, not its actual body, given solidity by the Nightmare. When you kill it, the real form is the shadowy embryo-like being floating over the corpse of Kos. Only when that is slain does the Nightmare Slain message play and you get the message about the, “Sweet child of Kos, returned to the ocean...”

It’s easy to extrapolate, then, that the baby was never part of a viable pregnancy. Perhaps it did die alongside Kos when she died, but if every Great One loses its child then it was never going to be properly born. Perhaps, generously, you could say that it ended up like Mergo, a consciousness in a Nightmare Realm without a body. It certainly was never allowed to properly develop into a full being, all it could do was emulate the physical forms of the creatures that took it from its mother. Perhaps this means that Kos died before her baby did, even if the pregnancy was never going to be able to finish, and in this particular exchange the child did survive in a capacity it may never have been able to before. Kos’ life for her orphan.

But what of Mergo?

Mergo only exists in that Nightmare realm, too. The Yharnam Stone that you get for defeating Queen Yharnam in the chalice dungeons is, ostensibly, a crystallized fetus, encased in solidified blood. We know of Queen Yharnam as Mergo’s mother, so does it not follow that the solidified fetus is Mergo’s form itself? And its formless, voice-only existence in the Nightmare is not just a marker of possible parentage by Oedon, but also a possible indicator that it died, which means the process of using a human (or humanoid) being as a surrogate wasn’t going to work 100% of the time. Yet, it survived in enough of a form to be worth kidnapping. As long as the Great One reaches the “embryo” development stage, it seems, the Great Ones can begin to construct their own higher realm of existence, but if they died at this early stage, it seems they can only partially construct it.

Mergo and Kos' orphan are unborn, as well. You are in the nightmares of the unborn, in 2/3 of Bloodborne’s Nightmare stages, with the Nightmare Frontier (frontier, of course, meaning border) separating the two unborn Great Ones’ Nightmares from each other, held in place by a border guardian: An Amygdala. (Amygdalae are, after all, the Great Ones through which your Hunter passes in order to access two of the Nightmare realms. It makes sense they exist to sit on the border between Waking World and Nightmare, and between the various Nightmares to keep the consciousnesses from interfering with each other).

When the Moon Presence descends from the sky, what is the first thing it does? It wraps itself around your character and presses its face into your hunter’s stomach. Now, it is easy to assume that Great Ones can’t immediately tell the difference between male and female humans, between which humans could potentially bear a child for them, and which cannot, or, perhaps, that the Great Ones don’t even care to make that distinction. Still, the way the Moon Presence shoves its head into your hunters’ stomach was always rather peculiar, as though it is trying to either “bless” your hunters’ belly with child, or checking to make sure that your hunter is not pregnant (regardless of if they are even capable or not). The Moon Presence certainly isn’t going to be bearing any children - it’s a spine wrapped in meat, with the ribs poking out. It has nowhere to even hold a baby to gestate. Clearly, your hunter isn’t much able to, either, because in the end, they’re either held in stasis in the Dream, or being touched within and without by the Great Ones turns them into a slug. Or, well, what if...?

Let’s talk about some of the Kin, shall we?

We know Rom was made the way she is because of Kos, since Micolash won’t shut up about it. Given the comments made about Rom by the development team, we can presume Rom was, as a human, female. But we need look no further than the fact Rom is surrounded by spiderlings. They bear a passing resemblance, at least in the face, to the Byrgenwerth Spider herself. But if Rom has children - where did they come from? Or, to be most precise, who impregnated her?

Instead of answering that question immediately, let us talk about Ebrietas. In the Orphanage of Upper Cathedral Ward are all those celestial larvae. They have wing-like appendages that are reminiscent of Ebrietas’ wings, and they’re all turned toward the Cathedral, underneath which is Ebrietas, as though trying to see or reach out to her. Now, if those Celestial Larvae are her children directly, then she would likely not be a full Great One, and only merely a kin; supported by the fact she drops Kin Coldblood. After all every Great One loses its child. But Arianna gives birth to one of them, too, so it could very well be that some of the women of Yharnam gave birth to them and they’re attracted to Ebrietas for other reasons.

One of those reasons could reasonably be that, say, Ebrietas was their Great One parent. More of a “father” than a mother, as little as those words really mean in the biology of breeding with Great Ones. We know the Choir was using Ebrietas for their experiments into ascension, and it could also be reasonably argued that her blood was cut in with Oedon’s for blood therapy and treatments. That could give her easy access to ensuring someone like Arianna’s womb developed a Great One child. One that was hers. You also see her bent over the Altar of Despair, grieving, apparently, a body that looks suspiciously like Rom’s. In this scenario, there’s more than a small argument to be made that Rom’s pregnancy is from contact with Ebrietas. 

Yet, if you ascribe to the idea that Ebrietas is kin, rather than a full Great One, it paints an even bleaker picture. Ebrietas was ascended from a “lesser” being, was left behind when the rest of the Great Ones ascended, and now exists to bear children, of which she has had many. Left behind in a realm where conception and birth is possible - the Waking World. Combine this with the number of children that surround Rom, and... well...

What if the ascension to Kin (at least, of the ones who were blessed by the Great Ones, and not created like the Celestial Emissaries) is either caused by or done because they are used to carry Great One children to term?

In this bleak scenario, Rom and Ebrietas both are essentially broodmares for the Great Ones. Ebrietas likely for Oedon, and Rom? Rom could be for Oedon as well, but we don’t know how much contact with Oedon’s Old Blood she had - but we do know at least one Great One she was touched by: Kos.

The changes to their bodies could have come because they successfully carried for a Great One, though it’s not guaranteed. While we know that contact with Kos can turn people (and. dogs.) into fish-like creatures, Queen Yharnam was never anything but a Pthumerian (though, again, the rules could be different for the Pthumerians), so it’s not guaranteed. But a human that is continually impregnated, to be a surrogate mother for Great Ones that yearn for children then turning into a Great One by exposure (but not so much of a Great One that they can no longer bear children), who then continues to give the Great Ones the children they want is a horrifying enough fate.

But I can do one worse. I can make all of this even more gruesome:

Parasitism is a very common theme in Bloodborne. In modern medicine, someone who wishes to be a surrogate mother can do so through traditional surrogacy or gestational surrogacy. Traditional surrogacy would be as I described it before: Where the surrogate mother’s own eggs are fertilized and the child is carried to term. Being used for one’s own fecundity to bear a Great One’s child would be an example of the former, generally speaking. Whomever bore the children would be the human half of the infant’s parentage.

But there is a second type: Gestational surrogacy. In modern medicine, this is where In Vitro Fertilization comes into play, and the embryo is implanted into the uterine lining of a surrogate. The baby is not biologically related to the person whom carries it: it is a different couple essentially “borrowing” a fertile surrogate’s womb in order to gestate a child because the original couple cannot bear the child for any number of reasons.

We know Great Ones can, at the very least, conceive children amongst themselves. Kos was pregnant, after all. So Great Ones are capable of breeding and, at the very least, getting through the very first stages of pregnancy.

In the most bleak scenario, what is happening in Yharnam isn’t Great Ones breeding with humans to just make the humans carry their babies because the Great Ones can’t have children -

They’re implanting their own fetuses into the wombs of Yharnamites and forcing them to carry unrelated children to term.

Like wasps laying eggs in tarantulas, except they need not enter through a wound.

It would be easy, as well. Oedon exists within the blood; “formless”, but still existent. Small, abstract enough to transport a fertilized Great One egg, zygote, even a small embryo and transfer it into a Yharnamites’ body. Other Great Ones would have to do it in different ways, but it makes sense this way why Oedon is usually the one pointed at for being the Great One parent for most of the infant Great Ones in the game.

Thinking of it that way, it makes sense why Elden Ring’s Bloodborne callback reference to Oedon is the Formless Mother; Oedon was never actually a "he" as the item descriptions refer. Oedon is just another Great One looking for a hapless mortal to bear the children it desires, but cannot carry.

Every Great One loses its child and yearns for a surrogate, a mother to carry and bear its child because it can no longer gestate. A child it does not even need, but wants anyway, for utterly inscrutable reasons.

Hope that “Eldritch Truth” was worth it.

[evileyekabuki]

Mr. White & His Sugar Bunny

Summary: It’s a late night in Japan after a job the Bullet Club’s leader Jay White decides to celebrate at Yujiro’s Bunny Palace that’s when Jay meets his Sugar Bunny Kimmie .

Jay White x OC (Kimmie)

The Bunny Palace was surprisingly quiet, usually at this time of night the palace would be loud, crowded & chaotic. Suzuki Gun would be threatening or beating up some poor guy outside the palace just for either looking at them or looking at Miho, TMDK would be too drunk out of their minds to know what’s even going on, The BCC would be yelling about all the crazy shit that they do, the were all crazy in their own ways but they weren’t even close to Bullet Club. Bullet Club are the kings of Japan pretty much doing whatever they want without a care in the word because they ruled the world & everyone around them were just pawns on their chess board, they owned almost all of Japan they even own the Bunny Palace, Yujiro was the boss of course he was the main one who brought most of the girls in the Palace & gave us a home he treats us well & with respect most pimps don’t do that but Yujiro was different. Even though Yujiro was seen as the face & boss of The Bunny Palace it was Bullet Club behind the scenes, Bullet Club provided Yujiro to start. Bullet Club are the kings of Japan & everybody knows it & there ain’t a damn thing anyone could do about it. I was still new to my new life so I wasn’t familiar with Bullet Club personally like Yujiro & the other bunny girls were but that would soon change.

“God it’s so damn boring it’s too quiet it’s driving me nuts” Rhea complained annoyed about nothing happening like it usually would. “Rhea this is a good thing it’s usually so loud & crazy here shouldn’t you be happy that we don’t have to deal with crazy gangs tonight.” Pieter asked feeling relieved not having to deal with any chaos tonight. “Pieter that’s the reason why I’m here.” Rhea smirked. “Darling enjoy it while it last.” Toni announced dramatically appearing from the dressing room wearing her overdramatic 1950’s gown & robe. “The boys are supposed to be coming back tonight so the peace won’t last any longer darling Miho.” Toni said before drinking her martini. “Bullet Clubs coming?” Kimmie asked also appearing from the dressing room, Kimmie was the new bunny girl in the palace she didn’t start working their until 5 months ago, she used to be a member of the United Empire before she left…well before she ran away but starts a whole different story for another day.

Rhea walked over to Kimmie with a smirk on her face ready to tease the new young girl. “You haven’t met Bullet Club yet?” Rhea asked in a teasing tone all Yasmina could do was shake her head no to the older woman. “You’ve been working here for 5 months & you still haven’t met them aww poor baby” Rhea teased even more. “That is a little sad” Penelope laughed joining in Rhea with the teasing. “Leave her alone you’re making her nervous” Pieter came to her defense but Rhea was right Yasmina was nervous meeting Bullet Club the kingpins of Japan was terrifying she didn’t even know if she could handle it. “Kimi darling don’t worry your pretty little head they’re harmless” Toni told her to calm her anxiety. “Harmless my ass” Rhea whispered to Penelope causing her to laugh. “Are you sure I’ve heard the stories about them & they sound bad” Kimmie asked Toni unsure & still filled with anxiety. “Don’t question me child! How dare you!” Toni turned her back to her flipped her hair dramatically also dramatically putting on her expensive vintage robe & storming off. “Ignore Toni she’s in one of her diva moments” Pieter laughed. “I know that they seem scary from all you heard about them & their business but don’t worry when you get to know them they’re really cool you’ll be okay I promise.” Pieter was Yujiro’s girlfriend, she was kind, sweet but at times she could be a little dumb but bless her heart, she was the main one why Yasmina was here in the first place, She was walking with Yujiro one night from a date & she saw her alone in the alleyway alone, scared & terrified so Pieter would approach her telling her that everything is okay & she’s there to help, she was a kind soul & helped Yasmina to become the bunny she is today so Yasmina always trusted her. “Okay Pieter I believe you” Kimmie hugged Pieter for comfort & Pieter hugged her back.

That’s when Kimmie saw Yujiro greeting a friend at the front entrance of the palace & let him in, the man was wearing a black leather jacket with a Bullet Club Gold shirt, his hair was in a nicely tied man bun and was wearing shades to protect his eyes from the Japan lights. “Who’s that” Kimmie asked. “That’s Jay.” Pieter told Kimmie but Kimmie wasn’t listening she was memorized by Jay he was handsome she was almost hypnotized by him and to her surprise he noticed, he saw her looking at him all he had to do was smile that’s when he set his attention back on Yujiro. “Good to see you boss it’s just you tonight?” Yujiro wasn’t used seeing Jay come to the Bunny Palace on his own, he was usually accompanied with Tasmo, Tama, Kenta, Juice or the Gunns but tonight it was just him. “Yeah it’s just me how’s business been” Jay asked his longtime friend. “Business been better than ever I even got a new bunny girl” Yujiro bragged to his boss causing Jay to smirk. “New bunny girl huh” Jay smirked being interested. “Yeah her names Kimmie she’s a little naive & isn’t the smartest but she’s really sweet.” Yujiro told his boss. Jay looked around to see Kimmie at the bar whipping down the bar while making a drink & Jay loved the sight, she was beautiful & young, younger than him, he knew that that he was way older than her but that didn’t matter to him he just wanted to talk to her. “Yujiro imma be at the last booth & get Kimmie as my server for tonight, tell her u want a whiskey” Jay directed his intentions & interest to Yujiro which he would complied. Yujiro walked over to the young bunny at the bar “Sweetheart I got a client for you” Yujiro smiled. Kimmie looked at him intrigued & excited “Okay who is it” Kimmie asked interested. Yujiro didn’t say anything he just pointed over to Jay sitting at the last booth of the palace that’s when she became flustered & nervously. “Are you sure if ready I’m still new” Kimmie told her boss. “You’re ready also he wants a whiskey.” Yujiro said before walking away from the palace & exchanging a smirk between him & his boss before he went back into his office. Kimmie was fluster & nervous all to hell but still she grabbed her tray & the cup of whiskey to serve Jay White.

“Hi…um my name’s Kimmie & I’ll be your bunny server for tonight.” Kimmie smiled as Jay smiled back at her. “Kimmie that’s a beautiful name I’m Jay.” Kimmie went to shake his hand but Jay took her hand & gave it a kiss such a gentlemen she couldn’t stop herself from giggling softly. “Your giggles cute just like you” Jay flirts making her smile and blush even more than she was before. “Thank you” Kimmie said before pouring him his drink. As she was pouring his drink Jay was just admiring her & her beauty he himself was hypnotized by her. She got finished pouring his drink “There you go if you need anything else just call for me” Kimmie gave him a smile before she could even think about walking away Jay stopped her. “Wait you don’t wanna stay with me you deserve a break working all night don’t you think?” Jay asked in a considerate voice and with a smile because of that Kimmie sat down with him. “So what’s a pretty girl like you doing working at a place like this” Jay asked the young woman. “It’s nice, the girls are nice, Mr Takahashi is a good boss & the pays really good.” Kimmie answered his question. “Someone like you deserves to have nice things not working at some whore house you deserve better I can give it to you” Jay told the younger women by holding her hand & telling her all she ever dreamed of. “Mr White” Kimmie blushed softly which causes Jay to smirk and blush himself. “Mr White? I like that” Jay smirked “What is it bunny” Jay asked her. “I love working here it’s nice & I get to meet wonderful people like you” Kimmie said. “Oh bunny I’m not a wonderful person sure I’m good in my own way but wonderful that’s extreme” Jay chuckled. “I don’t believe that I think everyone’s wonderful in their own way even you” Kimmie smiled making Jay smile himself.

They sat at that booth talking for hours enjoying each other’s company & time. Jay didn’t usually like the Bunny Palace but he started to appreciate it because of Kimmie. That’s when Jay got closer to Kimmie & placed her in his lap, she was blushing as Jay had her facing him sitting on his lap even though she looked so naive and innocent she did enjoy being in the older man’s lap & Jay noticed. That’s when Jay kissed her & Kimmie would obliged and kissed him back. Jay held the younger woman around her waist as she wrapped her arms around his neck & deepened the kiss. It was hot & passionate Jay slide his hand down and groped her ass causing Kimmie to moan. Jay broke the kiss to smirk and even tease her “Damn bunny you like that” Jay groped her again causing her to moan once more & nod her head yes in pleasure. Jay played with her bunny tail and slapped her ass causing her to moan louder just like he wanted. *moan* “Yes Mr White” Kimmie whimpered softly. “You want Mr White to show you a good time” Jay smirked like a wolf at the naive younger woman “Yes please” Kimmie said sounding so submissive for him, Jay got up from the booth & took Kimmie’s hand to follow him to the bunny play rooms.

As they walked into the bunny play room Kimmie was blushing still not being able to believe that she was breathing with the switchblade, the king of Japan Jay White it felt like a dream she couldn’t & didn’t want to wake up from. The room was light pink do to the lighting, It smelled like Japanese cherry blossom, the petals were ever spread out on the floor & even bed, and lastly the bed was shaped as a bunny finishing the look of the room. Jay kissed Kimmie again before breaking the kiss one more time before he went over to the bunny shaped bed and sat down on the edge waiting for Kimmie to see what she’ll do. “Come here little bunny” Jay called her over which she came to him waiting for his next command “You know how to suck dick bunny” Jay asked as he started to undo his belt in front of her, Kimmie nodded her head yes to his satisfaction. “Show me how you suck dick maybe I could teach you some new things” Jay said smirking & admiring her. Kimmie got down on her knees with a soft pillow beneath her knees as she started to unzip the older man’s pants & took his dick out of his boxers. Once Kimmie saw how big & turned on he was by her she became flustered & even nervous. “Don’t be scared it’s alright imma take care of you but first I need that pretty little mouth around my cock” Jay pet her on the head even playing with her hair.

Kimmie then began to tease the older man by blowing on his tip before she put her mouth on his cock starting to bob her head at a nice & steady pace “ugh fuck” Jay groaned in pleasure & lust he held her head down looking over her like she was nothing compared to him. “You love sucking dick don’t you… oh fuck” Jay said making her bob her head faster she couldn’t say anything so she just simply moaned around his dick. Jay loved the feeling of her mouth so he started to thrust into her mouth started to fuck her mouth hard & deep to the point he could feel his dick hitting the back of her throat. Kimmie gagged around him “Oh fuck!” Jay came inside her mouth without any warning or hesitation, when he looked down at her she was surprised & blushing. “Swallow” Jay commanded & to his delight she swallowed his cum. She looked up at Jay with innocent looking eyes when she was far away from being innocent.

“Damn bunny you’re good” Jay praised her by petting her on the head causing her to blush again even harder than before. “You want me to eat your sweet little pussy” Jay smirked asking the question waiting for her answer. “Yes Mr White please eat my pussy” Kimmie tone was submissive but slutty at the same time. Jay picked her up from her knees and pushed her on to the bed, Kimmie looked up at him as he was at the bed of the bed seductively taking off her white panties which were soaked & wet all because of him. Jay went down on the younger woman he teased her with his tongue, his sweet & exotic tongue. He started by licking her clit making her squeal & whimpered “mmmmm” Kimmie was dying for him needy and wanting more of him. Jay held her by her hips as he went on to fuck her with his tongue licking & loving her most precious parts of her sweet pussy. “Mr White…ahh” Yasmina moaned feeling herself getting even more turned on she was close to coming any second & he knew that. But all of a sudden he stopped & right before she could cum she whined in complaints about not being able to cum. “Why did you stop” Kimmie voice was whiny & even a little bratty as well. “If you wanna cum bunny then you need to ride my dick” Jay said in a seductive voice before he picked her up to be on top of him as he was on the bottom holding her hips while smirking.

Kimmie did as she was told being a good bunny, she started to sink herself on his dick he was big and Kimmie was struggling even trying to get all the way on him, Jay chuckled he ended up grabbing her by her waist and slamming her all the way on his dick causing her to moan at the level of a porn star “AHHHH” Kimmie moaned feeling him all of him inside of her. “Sorry baby but I want you to feel it” Jay told her before his hands went back to around her hips. Kimmie started to bounce on his dick but at a nice & slow pace wanting to feel all his length inside of her, “Oh fuck” Kimmie moaned feeling all of him her eyes even rolled back in pleasure. “That’s it baby ride this dick” Jay groaned smirking before Kimmie started to go at a steady pace. She was hugging his cock with her pussy, she was really tight but after one night with Jay she’ll be loose. “God damn baby your pussy’s so tight” Jay moaned himself before he started thrusting upward inside of her causing her to go faster & start to moan. “Mr White oh my god Mr White” Kimmie moaned practically worshiping him calling his name over & over. All that you could hear in the room was moan, groans, grunts, whimpers of course with the accompanying noise was wet slapping skin. Jay held her hips tighter wanting to hold her close to him wanting to feel her. Jay threw his head back as the speed started to increase by every thrust. “Fuck bunny you’re so good at riding dick, you’re so fucking good” Jay praised her in between groans as she moaned loving him & his words of praise. Kimmie couldn’t take it anymore she was a complete mess moaning like a slut, a whore even a porn star but Jay loved it seeing the so called “innocent” little girl act like a complete slut for him. “You wanna cum don’t you bunny” Jay thrust harder. “Yes Mr White please let me cum, please you make my pussy feel so good ahhh” Kimmie moan her begging for Jay was music to his ears so of course he let her cum. Jay would follow suit a while after her.

Afterwards Jay was holding Kimmie her head was on his chest, his sweaty chest. All Jay could do was look down at her and smile as he would play with her hair as she would lay their & smile herself before she eventually fell asleep. All Jay could think about was how much he was in love with her, how much he loved her & how much he needed and wanted to protect her & he would do anything for her no matter what.

[monsterrae1]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💖

Oh god I suck at self recs 😂

Eddie Diaz discovers the secrets of the universe

After leaving the 118 Eddie has too much time on his hands and comes across a book that would change his life.

He finds himself dealing with all his past repression and trauma, coming the other side better, happier.

What we had (sad, beautiful, tragic love affair)

Eddie met Evan during a summer in 2012 while they were both trying to find their place in the world, and fell completely in love, but when has Eddie ever gotten to keep what we wants?

After leaving Evan behind without word, he spend 7 years trying to get over him without succeeding.

In 2018, Evan walks back into his life, leading to Eddie to fall in love with him again, even with the mountain of guilt and mistakes he's made in the past, too bad the universe doesn't grand second chances. Or does it?

(also known as the summer fling/exes to lovers fic, Eddie's version)

Echoes of love

“The house isn’t haunted” Eddie said sighing, they were at the locker room, and Buck was telling Eddie about what had happen the night before as they got ready to start their shift.

“Oh, you guys live in a haunted house?” Chim asked, excitedly “What happen?” He dropped his bag next to their and started to change into his uniform too.

“Nothing happened” Eddie said at the same time Buck said:

“We have a ghost”

“Buck” Eddie said, a tone of voice that Buck was all too familiar with, exasperation laced with fondness, even his eye roll was full of love “You were exhausted, you probably left the box there earlier that morning, God knows I’ve lost track of your unpacking process by now”

*

Also known as, the haunted house fic

You’re on your own kid (you always have been)

Evan had rehearsed this a million times, he was supposed to say:

My name is Evan Buckley, I’m 13 years old and I want to be emancipated from my parents. They had me to save my brother, and all my life that’s all I’ve been, spare parts, they don’t even look at me twice unless they need something for Daniel. I’m not allowed to have friends because they need me to be at home in case they need anything for him. I’m not allowed to play outside because I’m not allowed to get hurt. Because I don’t belong to myself, I belong to them, and I want to belong to myself.

He had just taken a deep breath to start his speech when his mother stood up from her seat and started to yell at him.

“Stop this nonsense, Evan! You’re taking time away from Daniel! He needs you; he needs you to help him, that’s why we had you”

That’s why we had you.

*

Evan had been born to save his brother, until he got himself out of his household. 20 years later, Buck and Eddie are trying to adopt a baby who was born to save her brother, and the trial opens up a lot of old wounds for Buck.

They’re bringing up my history (you aren’t even listening)

“Buck!” Chim called out to him, “We’re going out for drinks, wanna join?”

They asked him every night when they went out, and as much as Buck wanted to, he couldn’t.

“Next time” he said, like he did every time. Chim and Hen gave him a sad look before nodding and turning their heads.

He just didn’t want to ruin their lives too.

It had been years since he last worked as an actor, years since he had crashed his bike, he’d been sober for years, and still, the media still looked for things he had done wrong, he sometimes still had paparazzies stationed outside his apartment complex, and he was in every BuzzFeed listicles about where are they now, and child actors with now normal jobs, once in a while his agent would still call him about interviews and book deals and, he just couldn’t risk his friends getting involved in that mess. He was lucky it hadn’t costed him his job yet.

*

Or former child actor Buck is trying to find happiness in a life outside of the public eye, but some reporters just wont let him have peace.

I love all of my children (fics) these are just the 5 that popped into mind rn

[acertainmoshke]

Meet the Author (revised)

My name is Moshke Palmoni. I also plan to publish children’s books under Lior Eisen, but I mainly go by Moshke. I use they/them pronouns and when I’m not writing I love to read, knit, snuggle my weirdo cat, or work on home projects to fix my 100-year-old house that the previous owners made some interesting choices for. I also have a day job that I am very passionate about but will not talk about here because I don’t want to mix my writing with my professional life. None of my projects are published yet but I’m getting there.

Active WIPs

(let me know if you want to be added to any taglists!)

General tag list: @ blind-the-winds

To Die Among the Stars

In the future, 20 people are sent into space on a second test of an FTL drive, aiming for a habitable planet. The first test was a disaster, so this time they’re more careful—the volunteers are only needed for data on how humans fare at faster than light speeds, so they are selected from prisons and “mental wellness centers” and areas where people would agree to a suicide mission for the promise of feeding their families. No one expects them to live, just to provide enough data to improve the next test. Told from 4 POVs: Pixel, a semiverbal black market modder; Ri, who has so many illicit mods embedded in his body he can no longer experience the world the way most people do; Zippy, a young disabled woman desperate to support her family; and Peppermint, a genetic experiment combining human and cat DNA raised in a lab with only a sentient android for company. Despite all expectations, the group bands together for survival.

Taglist: @ hd-literature

A Tangled Knot of Gold

Technically the 3rd Legends of Halara book, but the first one was not cooperating so here we are. Tlapil is the cousin of the heir to the throne, Soter, who is also the only person who treats her like a person because she is semi-verbal with unusual body language and interests. Her main useful skill seems to be mapmaking, but when the kingdom needs unusual solutions she’s ready to help—along with her only other friend, who happens to be a slime. Having proven herself, she holds a respectable position as advisor to her cousin, but when tragedy threatens to tear apart the entire kingdom it might be up to her to find a way to hold it together.

Halaran cultural genders explained here, and non-human genders here. Explanation of the religious system here.

Fae and Brownie

10-year-old Fae Grant is autistic and ataxic and struggles in school, socially and with meeting expectations. Right after she meets the new boy, Brownie, a meltdown leads to a week’s suspension just as her aunt moves in with her family. Fae’s adventures over that week lead her to a new best friend, realizations about accommodating her communication difficulties, and new acceptance of being who she is.

Backburnered WIPs under the cut

Cold Iron

Shakatra Zoawin has been alive for 107 years, but they are only 33 old. They are one of the few Fae changelings able to survive to adulthood in our world—they age slowly, their magic is more powerful than any human sorcerer, and they have a particular knack for glamour. All they’ve ever wanted was to be left alone on the fringes of society with their brother Kris, also a changeling. But now, on top of raising their teenage stepson and the age-frozen human child they replaced, they might be the only one with both the Fae-aligned skills to protect humanity and the remotest inclination to do that.

Time to Kill (working title)

Esther Dahan is part of one of the first teams ever sanctioned to use time travel technology. Against all historical odds, they aren’t cops or soldiers—they’re anthropologists. Her team specializes in Jewish history specifically, and as tough as it is to leave her young daughter behind for long stretches the team is like her family as they get to truly experience what life was once like, always careful not to change anything (the butterfly effect having been disproven, they must still not share too much information or come in contact with major figures). And yet, something is off. In more and more time periods, they find suspicious activity. But they can never quite get enough proof to convince anyone why this matters—why they should believe that these scientists found the first known rogue travelers. It’s not until trying to solve the mystery on their own leads to Esther’s life being torn apart that they’re taken seriously, and even then her team might be the only ones capable of finding out the truth and stopping something even worse.

Falling Petals (working title)

A story of 3 generations of autistic people before any of them would have been diagnosed, loosely based on the life experiences of my family during different times. Also about relationships and imperfect love. Ira Katz was born in 1913, the only child of slightly older Russian Jewish immigrant parents. He grew up in California and lived a fairly normal life, except that he wasn’t normal. He was very charming, but didn’t understand why mean jokes or blunt truths weren’t appreciated. He assumed everyone was as interested in his niche interests as he was and despite loving the beauty in the world and the people around him felt unable to connect with any of them. He would grow up to marry a girl he knew from synagogue named Joy and have 4 children, whom he loved from a distance and teased with a brilliant and oblivious cruelty. He inherited his father’s drug store, which he enjoyed because his scripted charm worked best on strangers.

Ira’s second child, Daniel, born in 1939, was also odd. He was very sensitive for a boy and called annoying for his awkward attempts at friendship. Eventually he channeled his sensory pain and constant overwhelm from tears to anger. He practiced on his own until he spoke like a professional adult, scripting replies that sounded like a real conversation. Adults loved him while other young people shunned him and his brother and father mocked him. He went to college and became an architect because it was more manly than being a librarian like he’d wanted, and while in school he met a high school teacher named Frances, who he married and had twins with. Daniel was determined not to mock his children and to spend time with them, which he did—but he also hid his pain and emotions until they exploded out in uncontrollable anger and struggled to deal with any noise or rule breaking. His drive to be successful managed to drown out everything else and sucked up all his energy.

One of Daniel’s two daughters, Shoshana, born in 1961, was also odd but in an opposite sort of way. Where Daniel had always seemed mature and professional even when unnecessary, Shoshana seemed childlike far longer than her sister. She continued to play with her dolls and make patterns with her marbles after other girls started whispering about boys. She froze up when she didn’t know the right social response and just wouldn’t respond. She broke down in tears when overwhelmed and was terrified of crowds. She felt like an utter failure despite being an avid reader with a good memory. She didn’t go to college or get married. She tried and failed to live on her own in her 20s. She felt unloveable. And then her sister had a child, Naomi, a child Shoshana saw her own life in, and suddenly she wanted to show her little niece how one could be happy and also different and what it actually meant to succeed. Which required her to figure that out herself first and notice her own strengths.

Eachw part is told from their own perspective and with compassion for their experiences. Everyone does the best they can and the goal is to show unhealthy coping mechanisms without denouncing anyone as a villain.