#when I am not drunk

[viv-hollande]

While Fëanor definitely has worse crimes, I still think the crime I am angriest about is the burning of the ships of Losgar. It is the perfect combination of meaninglessness and hypocrisy and I will never forgive him for it.

The first aspect of this crime is the meaninglessness. Abandoning Fingolfin's company does nothing but create problems where none previously existed. Fingolfin, to my recollection, had no actual intention of overthrowing Fëanor, and Fëanor's convictions to the contrary are simply his own paranoid delusions. Fingolfin's company represents more than half of the host of the rebelling Noldor, and to abandon is simply folly. Perhaps it is a warning sign that the eldest and wisest son of Fëanor argued against such an action.

In addition to the meaninglessness of the move, there is also the hypocrisy. The Teleri specifically tell Fëanor that their ships are to them what the Silmarils are to him. Fëanor is presented here with the best opportunity to recognize that he has gone too far in the pursuit of the Silmarils, yet he refuses to take it. The Teleri specifically tell him that the Swan Ships are their greatest creations. "But as for our White Ships; those you gave us not. We learned not that craft from the Noldor, but from the Lords of the Sea; and the white timbers we wrought from our own hands, and the white sails were woven by our wives and our daughters. Therefore we will neither give them nor sell them for any league or friendship. For I say to you, Fëanor son of Finwë, these are to us as are the gems of the Noldor: the make of our hearts, whose like we shall not make again."

For Fëanor, greatest craftsman of the Noldor who knows more than any other what it is to have one's treasured creations stolen, to steal from another a work of craftsmanship unparalleled in their own history, is a crime incomparable in both its cruelty and it's hypocrisy. And as though theft were not enough, Fëanor proceeded to destroy these creations which could not be replicated again, even by their original creators. It is desecration and hypocrisy of the highest order. We know how Fëanor reacted to the theft of his own greatest creations; imagine how he would react to their destruction.

In short, fuck Fëanor, he deserved everything that came his way, and I hope his sons suffer in his stead.

I'm kidding. I know that they are Doomed by the Narrative, but I want Maedhros and Maglor to be happy at least.

They probably won't be.

Because I keep torturing them.

Please forgive any spelling errors, I am very drunk.

[attyrocious]

happy birthday to my guy!!!!!

[carissime]

Literally no thoughts just Gojo after your wedding carrying you over the threshold of your hotel room. You’re not leaving for your honeymoon until the morning but he nearly trips on the doorframe in his haste.

“You really don’t need to carry me—”

“But it’s tradition, we need to consummate the marriage!” he insists. Within seconds his lips are against yours and he’s fumbling with the light switch, and you finally swat his hand away and just beg him to take you to the bed.

He works the zipper of your dress down, part of him sad that he’s not going to see you in this gorgeous gown again, but then it reveals your white lace lingerie and the groan he lets out is broken and guttural and desperate.

This is far from the first time he’s seen you like this, but there’s something about this moment here and now that makes it so much more intense, so much more intimate and he just never wants to let you go.

“Satoru,” you whisper, and his breath hitches.

He leans down to capture your lips in a kiss. “Shh, I know. Just lemme take care of you, like I promised.”

And when he sees the gold band on his fourth finger pressing into the skin of your hips as he sheaths himself inside of you, he nearly loses himself, sending up a prayer to whatever gods are listening that he can keep his promise to keep you safe and happy forever.

[wifeyoozi]

When gameboi wonwoo isn't giving you enough attention so you take the matters in your own hands. (smut, MDNI, mild spanking and degradation)

Wonwoo had been spending a lot of time gaming recently and you know he isn't ignoring you on purpose, he probably isn't even noticing how little time he's spending with you these days and that's something you could change. You definitely could make yourself more attractive than Wonwoo's stupid games, right!?

You sigh dramatically as you enter Wonwoo's room with a mop. You put almost no effort into mopping, but Wonwoo is staring the fuck out of you. You try to ignore the tug at your lips threatening a smirk. You gotta be discreet.

"Y/n? What are you doing?"

"cleaning, why?" Wonwoo had muted his mic and had stopped smashing his keyboard, meaning your plan was working.

Wonwoo raises an eyebrow. "And what are you wearing?"

"An apron! Couldn't get myself dirty, y'know."

"and nothing underneath that." Wonwoo stated. He got up his chair, no longer bothered to win whatever game he was playing and walks up to you. You giggle when he holds both of your wrists and hold them above your head, the mop falling down.

It was that easy to get Wonwoo's attention back to you. All you had to do was roam around the house naked and he would come running to you like a dog coming for his food.

He's kissing you aggressively now, breathless as he shoves his tongue in your mouth. His other hand reach to untie the damn apron which hid nothing. His large hand roamed around the bare span of your body, from your back to your ass to your thighs and back at your ass, groping and squeezing the mass their. His mouth detached to yours and found itself on your neck, biting and bruising and marking. You moaned out his name as he began abusing your bare nipples now.

He then swiftly turns you around and pushes your face against the nearest wall, so that your ass was to him. He untied the strings of his sweatpants and took them off with his boxers in one go, his hard and big dick now throbbing against his torso. You are wet enough for him to slide in two fingers easily and he works them to scissor you open and prepare you for him.

When you re ready enough and give him the go, he plunged his dick in you. His glasses are fogged up as he fucks you fast. You moan and whimper his name everytime he hit your sweet spot. He spanks your ass a few times, calling you out for disturbing him and ruining his match and probably making him lose. Not that he really cared about those things when he was balls deep in you. Punishment sex was just sexy.

You mutter a sorry and your not builds up in your abdomen hearing him degrade you, calling you a needy slut. You know he's close too, from the way he stutters in speech and how his breath hitches. His fingers find your clit, giving you just the right stimulation to align your orgasm to his. He pulls out just in time, giving his dick a single jerk before he's nutting on your ass, painting the reddened flesh white.

He has to hold you from collapsing after you reach your high, your skin still tingling from the dopamine release. You both are panting.

"maybe next time you can just tell me when you want to fuck so I don't pop a boner while talking to my friends."

"Maybe next time don't go as long as three hours without giving me attention."

"Maybe next time you should sit on my lap and cockwarm me when I game."

[boarloved-art]

Wei Wuxian should be able to get drunk for once. I think he'd either be singing bawdy drinking songs on the roof of the Jingshi or he'd be getting irrevocably lost no matter where he is. He's found in the bushes behind the mountains like a cryptid, and then he's like "I can't believe you all got lost" (extremely slurred) as if he didn't get embarrassed by something Lan Wangji had said and just somehow disappeared when everyone looked back at him

oh ABSOLUTELY im walking with u and nodding and agreeing, i can see him becoming an absolute menace to keep track of at his drunkest.

anyway heres wonderwall The Gang (Wangxian & their fave group of ducklings) in a city known for its STRONG wine and wuxian being like well. ur all grown now, youre technically not juniors anymore. we have to see whos lasting the longest against this stuff!, smash cut to a suspiciously wei ying-less group of the worlds drunkest cultivators being wrangled through the woods by designated driver hanguang-jun, with at least 2 of them clinging to his robes at all times.

[simplydnp]

The Dan in the Shrek shirt and hat is giving “we were being silly and soft still in our pjs in the hotel room” vibes like he looks like he just woke up 😭🥺

lightly tousled for sure. a lil squinty a little flirty a little ruffled. definitely part of how they recovered from jet lag

[leroiestmortvivelareine]

'Lack of plot' is a hilarious criticism. Apart from not being true, so what if it were? Plots are for books that don't have Jean Moreau. Plots are for poor, impoverished stories that lack even a single Fox. We will devour 300 pages of nothing but Jean snarking at complete strangers and still beg for more. Give us 300 pages of nothing but Neil cyberbullying Riko under an assumed name, we'll eat it up. We will immerse ourselves in 300 pages of Kevin locked in his own bedroom and seen through even the smallest keyhole, we will never want to emerge. These characters ARE plots. They are the path and the gateway to better versions of ourselves. Don't you see? We're living our lives with them inside of us, we've become the plot.

[bruciemilf]

Am I wrong ?? You’re gonna look at me and tell me I’m wrong???

[criminalflower]

This is the face of a man who's mentally going through all of his exes to figure out which one he got pregnant.

[ask-october-fox]

This fox turned 339 today! 🎂🎉 Gonna be having a little celebration tonight so I may or may not have something to post, we'll see! I plan to have a very nice dinner, and partake in some fine (alcoholic) spirits ;3

[unexpectedbrickattack]

Drinking Buddies :)

[moonstruckme]

You guys you guys!!! Look at the tree my mom and I made :)

It’s our little woodland animal tree cut from a branch we found on the curb ! Because my stepdad is allergic to pine?? Which at first felt like a sad joke but idk I think our alternative turned out pretty cute. My mom crocheted the garland!

[talesfrommedinastation]

Happy Tech Tuesday!

Don't know what he's taking a selfie of, y'all figure that one out ;)

@deezlees @eyecandyeoz @thecoffeelorian @leenabb104104 @autistic-artistech @perfectlywingedcrusade @deoxd @auntie-venom and everyone else who likes the old boy!

[justaz]

arthur has always been suspicious of the tavern excuse for merlin’s absences, but he has no proof on the contrary and when confronted merlin either tells him outlandish tales of near death experiences that have no chance of being remotely truthful or he admits to and apologizes for slacking on his duties to get drunk. one day, he decides enough is enough and he and all the knights go to the tavern with merlin and arthur casually brings up merlin’s history in the tavern and says he could probably beat gwaine in a drinking contest. merlin tries to divert the discussion away from the idea but arthur is determined. they receive a round of drinks and arthur pushes a pint of ale into merlin’s hands with a look of challenge. merlin’s options are to either commit to the lie to hide his secret or admit to the lie and risk exposing his magic. he takes the former. merlin gives lancelot a Look and then slams back the pint of ale with a minor bit of gagging and pauses to breath. gwaine already finished his pint thirty seconds ago but its entertaining to watch merlin so he doesn’t say anything.

merlin (built like a twig, rarely drinks, lightweight) is proper sloshed. arthur is almost vindicated but he needs merlin to admit it. he orders two more pints and gives one to gwaine and the second to merlin, instigating the competition further despite the fact that gwaine won already. merlin grimaces and tries to do the same thing again but only gets a few gulps in before he folds. he slams the mug down and gives arthur a kicked puppy look before admitting and apologizing for lying. arthur is Vindicated. merlin is still wasted.

the nights wears on and merlin feels the effect of the ale more and more every minute that passes. he sits between arthur and lancelot and feels almost unbearably warm but that could be bc of the alcohol in his system, or the crowded tavern. merlin looks around and watches the people that pass their table by while the knights talk and joke and laugh amongst themselves. merlin feels relaxed and excitable now, his worries seem to have melted away and he cant seem to remember why he was always so stressed and worn down before. he sees a game of [insert game here] (i was gonna say darts but google says that game hasn’t been invented in canon time so ill leave it up to interpretation) going on and climbs over lancelot to join in.

the knights watch with amusement and anticipate merlin’s clumsy attempts at [whatever]. oddly enough tho, merlin is a fucking god at [game]. a small crowd gathers and betting pools form and then challengers approach and put money on the line to go against merlin and merlin absolutely demolishes them all. honestly if arthur didn’t know any better, he’d think merlin was using magic to win bc there was no way his bumbling fool of a servant was that good at…anything.

the challengers take their defeat with honor and grace. the audience is a huge fan of merlin and they keep buying him drinks but he just sends them to the table for the other’s to drink. many people come up to him and flirt, maybe motivated by all the money he won that night or maybe just bc he’s merlin, and when merlin responds to them he’s………..he’s a real good fucking flirt? like could put gwaine to shame and he’s rejecting them???? how can someone come across so flirtatiously while turning down offers to take various beautiful people to bed??

arthur was already itching to intervene when people were flirting with merlin but he seemed to have a handle on it so he let it slide, but then people started touching merlin and arthur’s hand had drifted to his hip where his sword was usually sheathed. however, again, merlin was very skilled at escaping the situations with little to no conflict and he came back to the table with his winnings. the knights cheer for him and order more drinks with his money which merlin is too inebriated to notice and truthfully doesn’t really care about. his eyes are on arthur and if arthur thought watching merlin flirt from afar was bad then having him up close in his personal space, hands brushing against his arms and dark eyelashes fluttering softly against his pale skin, breathing his name into the space between them and licking his full pink lips was absolute torture and the worst and best agony he couldn’t even dream up.

[junglejim4322]

Can you imagine being this toddler and in 10 years finding out your mom posted stuff like this about your family on tiktok

[xxplastic-cubexx]

was watching apocalypse with my brother and once the cerebro scene popped up he was like 'charles has a helmet like erik, only instead of keeping people out, he tries to reach out and connect with others' like guys i need to bash him with a rock