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soundsfaebutokay · 3 years ago

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So I've recc'd this video before, but it deserves its own post because it's one of my favorite things on youtube. It's a Tedx Talk by comics writer, editor, and journalist Jay Edidin, and I really think that it will connect with a lot of people here.

If you live and breathe stories of all kinds, you might like this.

If you care about media representation, you might like this.

If you're neurodivergent, you might like this.

If you're interested in a gender transition story that veers from the norm, you might like this.

If you love the original Leverage and especially Parker, and understand how important it is that a character like her exists, you will definitely like this.

Transcript below the cut:

You Are Here: The Cartography of Stories

by Jay Edidin

I am autistic. And what this means in practice is that there are some things that are easier for me than they are for most people, and a great many things that are somewhat harder, and these affect my life in more or less overt ways. As it goes, I'm pretty lucky. I've been able to build a career around special interests and granular obsession. My main gig at the moment is explaining superhero comics continuity and publishing history for which work I am somehow paid in actual legal currency—which is both a triumph of the frivolous in an era of the frantically pragmatic, and a job that's really singularly suited to my strengths and also to my idiosyncrasies.

I like comics. I like stories in general, because they make sense to me in ways that the rest of the world and my own mind often don't. Self-knowledge is not an intuitive thing for me. What sense of self I have, I've built gradually and laboriously and mostly through long-term pattern recognition. For decades, I didn't even really have a self-image. If you'd asked me to draw myself, I would eventually have given you a pair of glasses and maybe a very messy scribble of hair, and that would've been about it. But what I do know—backwards, forwards, and in pretty much every way that matters—are stories. I know how they work. I understand their language, their complex inner clockwork, and I can use those things to extrapolate a sort of external compass that picks up where my internal one falls short. Stories—their forms, their structure, the sense of order inherent to them—give me the means to navigate what otherwise, at least for me, would be an impassable storm of unparsable data. Or stories are a periscope, angled to access the parts of myself I can't intuitively see. Or stories are a series of mirrors by which I can assemble a composite sketch of an identity I rarely recognize whole...which is how I worked out that I was transgender, in my early thirties, by way of a television show.

This is my story. And it's about narrative cartography, and representation, and why those things matter. It's about autism and it's about gender and it's about how they intersect. And it's about the kinds of people we know how to see, and the kinds of people we don't. It's not the kind of story that gets told a lot, you might hear a lot, because the narrative around gender transition and dysphoria in our culture is really, really prescriptive. It's basically the story of the kid who has known for their whole life that they're this and not that, and that story demands the kind of intuitive self-knowledge that I can't really do, and a kind of relationship to gender that I don't really have—which is part of why it took me so long to figure my own stuff out.

So, to what extent this story, my story has a beginning, it begins early in 2014 when I published an essay titled, "I See Your Value Now: Asperger's and the Art of Allegory." And it explored, among other things, the ways that I use narrative and narrative structures to navigate real life. And it got picked up in a number of fairly prominent places that got linked, and I casually followed the ensuing discussion. And I was surprised to discover that readers were fairly consistently assuming I was a man. Now, that in itself wasn't a new experience for me, even though at the time I was writing under a very unambiguously female byline. It had happened in the letter columns of comics I'd edited. It had happened when a parody Twitter account I'd created went viral. When I was on staff at Wired, I budgeted for fancy scotch by putting a dollar in a box every time a reader responded in a way that made it clear they were assuming I was a man in response to an article where my name was clearly visible, and then I had to stop doing that because it happened so often I couldn't afford to keep it up. But in all of those cases, the context, you know, the reasons were pretty obvious. The fields I'd worked in, the beats I covered, they were places where women had had to fight disproportionally hard for visibility and recognition. We live in a culture that assumes a male default, so given a neutral voice and a character limit, most readers will assume a male author.

But this was different, because this wasn't just a book I'd edited, it wasn't a story I'd reported—it was me, it was my story. And it made me uncomfortable, got under my skin in ways that the other stuff really hadn't. And so I did what I do when that happens, and I tried to sort of reverse-engineer it to look at the conclusions and peel them back to see the narratives behind them and the stories that made them tick. And I started this, I started this by going back to the text of the essay, and you know, examining it every way I could think of: looking at craft, looking at content. And in doing so, I was surprised to realize that while I had written about a number of characters with whom I identified closely, that every single one of those characters I'd written about was male. And that surprised me even more than the responses to the essay had, because I've spent my career writing and talking and thinking about gender and representation in popular media. In 2014, I'd been the feminist gadfly of an editorial department and multiple mastheads. I'd been a founding board member of an organization that existed to advocate for more and better representation of women and girls in comics characters and creators. And most of my favorite characters, the ones I'd actively seek out and follow, were women. Just not, apparently, the characters I saw myself in.

Now I still didn't realize it was me at this point. Remember: self-knowledge, not very intuitive for me. And while I had spent a lot of time thinking about gender, I'd never really bothered to think much about my own. I knew academically that the way other people read and interpreted my gender affected and had influenced a lifetime of social and professional interactions, and that those in turn had informed the person I'd grown up into during that time. But I really believed, like I just sort of had in the back of my head, that if you peeled away all of that social conditioning, you'd basically end up with what I got when I tried to draw a self-portrait. So: a pair of glasses, messy scribble of hair, and in this case, maybe also some very strong opinions about the X-Men. I mean, I knew something was off. I'd always known something was off, that my relationship to gender was messy and uncomfortable, but gender itself struck me as messy and uncomfortable, and it had never been a large enough part of how I defined myself to really feel like something that merited further study, and I had deadlines, and...so it was always on the back burner. So, I looked, I looked at what I had, at this improbable group of exclusively male characters. And I looked and I figured that if this wasn't me, then it had to be a result of the stories I had access to, to choose from, and the entertainment landscape I was looking at. And the funny thing is, I wasn't wrong, exactly. I just wasn't right either.

See, the characters I'd written about had one other significant trait in common aside from their gender, which is that they were all more or less explicitly, more or less heavily coded as autistic. And I thought, "Ah, yes. This explains it. This is under representation in fiction echoing under representation in life and vice versa." Because the characteristics that I'd honed in on, that I particularly identified with in these guys, were things like emotional unavailability and social awkwardness and granular obsession, and all of those are characteristics that are seen as unsympathetic and therefore unmarketable in female characters. Which is also why readers were assuming that I was a man.

Because, you see, here's the thing. I'm not the only one who uses stories to navigate the world. I'm just a little more deliberate about it. For humans, stories formed the bridge between data and understanding. They're where we look when we need to contextualize something new, or to recognize something we're pretty sure we've seen before. They're how we identify ourselves; they're how we locate ourselves and each other in the larger world. There were no fictional women like me; there weren't representations of women like me in media, and so readers were primed not to recognize women like me in real life either.

Now by this point, I had started writing a follow-up essay, and this one was also about autism and narratives, but specifically focused on how they intersected with gender and representation in media. And in context of this essay, I went about looking to see if I could find even one female character who had that cluster of traits I'd been looking for, and I was asking around in autistic communities. And I got a few more or less useful one-off suggestions, and some really, really splendid arguments about semantics and standards, and um...then I got one answer over and over and over in community after community after community. "Leverage," people told me. "You have to watch Leverage."

So I watched Leverage. Leverage is five seasons of ensemble heist drama. It's about a team of very skilled con artists who take down corrupt and powerful plutocrats and the like, and it's a lot of fun, and it's very clever, and it's clever enough that it doesn't really matter that it's pretty formulaic, and I enjoyed it a lot. But what's most important, what Leverage has is Parker.

Parker is a master thief, and she is the best of the best of the best in ways that all of Leverage's characters are the best of the best. And superficially, she looks like the kind of woman you see on TV. So she's young, and she's slender, and she's blonde, and she's attractive but in a sort of approachable way. And all of that familiarity is brilliant misdirection, because the thing is, there are no other women like Parker on TV. Because Parker—even if it's never explicitly stated in the show—Parker is coded incredibly clearly as autistic. Parker is socially awkward. Her speech tends to have limited inflection; what inflection it does have is repetitive and sounds rehearsed a lot of the time. She's not emotionally literate; she struggles with it, and the social skills she develops over the series, she learns by rote, like they're just another grift. When she's not scaling skyscrapers or cartwheeling through laser grids, she wears her body like an ill-fitting suit. Parker moves like me. And Parker, Parker was a revelation—she was a revolution unto herself. In a media landscape where unempathetic women usually exist to either be punished or "loved whole," Parker got to play the crabby savant. And she wasn't emotionally intuitive but it was never ever played as the product of abuse or trauma even though she had survived both of those—it was just part of her, as much as were her hands or her eyes. And she had a genuine character arc. My god, she had a genuine romantic arc, even. And none of that required her to turn into anything other than what she was. And in Parker I recognized a thousand tics and details of my life and my personality...but. I didn't recognize myself.

Why? What difference was there in Parker, you know, between Parker and the other characters I'd written about? Those characters, they'd spanned ethnicities and backgrounds and different media and appearances and the only other characteristic they all had in common was their gender. So that was where I started to look next, and I thought, "Well, okay, maybe, maybe it's masculinity. Maybe if Parker were less feminine, she'd click with me the way those other characters had." So then I tried to imagine a Parker with short hair, who's explicitly butch, and...nothing. So okay, I extended it in what seems like the only logical direction to extend it. I said, "Well, if it's not masculinity, what if it's actual maleness? What if Parker were a man?" Ah. Yeah.

In the end, everything changed, and nothing changed, which is often the way that it goes for me. Add a landmark, no matter how slight, and the map is irrevocably altered. Add a landmark, and paths that were invisible before open wide. Add a landmark, and you may not have moved, but suddenly you know where you are and where you can go.

I wasn't going to tell this story when I started planning this talk. I was gonna tell a similar story, it was about stories, like this is, about narratives and the ways that they influence our culture and vice versa. And it centered around a group of women at NASA who had basically rewritten the narrative around space exploration, and it was a lot more fun, and I still think it was more interesting. But it's also a story you can probably work out for yourselves. In fact it's a story some of you probably have, if you follow that kind of thing, which you probably do given that you're here. And this is a story, my story is not a story that I like to tell. It's not a fun story to talk about because it's very personal and I am a very private person. And it's not universal. And it's not always relatable, and it's definitely not aspirational. And it's not the kind of story that you tend to encounter unless you're already part of it...which is why I'm telling it now. Because the thing is, I'm not the only person who uses stories to parse the world and navigate it. I'm just a little more deliberate. Because I'm tired of having to rely on composite sketches.

Open your maps. Add a landmark. Reroute accordingly.

#Jay Edidin #LGBTQ #autism #mind and body #gender norms #why humans need stories #Leverage #Parker #Abby posts Leverage #my faves #Youtube #I did my best with the transcript #sorry for any mistakes

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simul16 · 3 years ago

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The Curious Case of the Original Women of Ravenloft (or Loose Canons Can Be Dangerous)

For many years, we in the Dungeons & Dragons RPG studio have considered things like D&D novels, D&D video games, D&D comic books, as wonderful expressions of D&D storytelling and D&D lore, but they are not canonical for the D&D roleplaying game. -Jeremy Crawford Those among us who are fortunate enough to become shepherds or stewards of the D&D game must train ourselves to become art and lore experts so that we know when we’re being faithful to the game’s past and when we’re moving in a new direction. We decide, based on our understanding of the game’s history and audience, what artwork or lore to pull forward, what artwork or lore needs to change, and what artwork or lore should be buried so deep that it never again sees the light of day. -Chris Perkins There is a very simple statement to be made about all these stories: they do not really come off intellectually as problems, and they do not come off artistically as fiction. They are too contrived, and too little aware of what goes on in the world. - Raymond Chandler, "The Simple Art of Murder"

There's been a bit of a stir in the D&D community over some comments that Jeremy Crawford made at a press briefing prior to the D&D Live event about how only the information published in a WotC Fifth Edition D&D product is 'canonical' for D&D. There was enough of a reaction that Chris Perkins, self-described as "one of the D&D Studio's principal game architects", published an article on the WotC site (linked under Perkins's name above) explaining this statement and explicitly calling out what it means when discussing an intellectual property with a long-standing and vast catalog of lore, where that lore is one of the primary positive features of that property.

On the surface, it seems pretty straight-forward. Crawford's comments focused on not overwhelming partners with lore requirements when producing peripheral products like novels and video games so that they can focus on producing their product rather than meeting arbitrary lore requirements (not that this seems to have helped the most recent video game product release). Perkins mentions this, too, explicitly evoking R.A. Salvatore's novels and how Salvatore (perhaps infamously) used to incorporate elements into his stories that were outright illegal according to the D&D game rules (such as Drizzt's dual-wielding of scimitars, only made legal in 5e, or his creation of Pikel Bouldershoulder, a 'mentally challenged' dwarf who believed himself to be a druid and even eventually displayed druid-like abilities, even though dwarves in the D&D of the era of the Cleric Quintet series, where Pikel appeared, were not allowed to be druids). Perkins's comments also refocused the discussion on players, DMs, and their games, making the point that every campaign develops its own canon, and that the version of the Forgotten Realms run at a given D&D table does not perfectly match either the version of the same world run at a different table, or even as presented in the official published campaign sourcebooks.

This position is easily defensible; I even presented it myself in a response on Twitter to Perkins's own comment on an event in the Acquisitions Incorporated campaign he runs and records for online consumption. A restaurant that exists in the Forgotten Realms of Acquisitions Incorporated might have been shut down for health reasons after a shambling mound attack in a different campaign, or a previous party of PCs might have made a disastrous error during the war with reborn Netheril that led to the fall of Cormyr, with the coastal area of the former kingdom being absorbed by their rivals in Sembia while the interior lands were allowed to be overrun with monsters migrating out of the Stonelands (which makes for a nearly ideal 'starter zone' for a new 5E Realms campaign, IMO).

But just because there are benefits to such an approach to canon doesn't mean that it's the best way to approach canon, particularly with respect to a property which has had a long lifespan and is expected to have an even longer one. There are plenty of ways to criticize such an approach, many of which have been brought up by other commenters:

In any long-lasting intellectual property, there is a core of fans that are devoted to the lore and canon of that property -- see Harry Potter, Star Wars, etc. 'Loosening up' the lore not only convinces your existing super-fans not to continue to support and evangelize your property, but also prevents the creation of a new generation of such fans to continue your property's life into a new generation of fans.

Since much of what is on offer in a published sourcebook is the current 'canon' (despite Perkins's statement that "we don't produce sourcebooks that spool out a ton of backstory", the reality is that much of the content of sourcebooks like the Sword Coast Adventurer's Guide and Van Richten's Guide to Ravenloft is setting material: i.e.: "backstory"), if you're not going to stand up for the lore of prior editions, and by implication make it clear that future editions aren't going to be beholden to the lore of even this edition, then why get heavily invested in the lore at all? (This ties into the above point, as the fewer people who get invested in the lore of a property, the fewer evangelists for that property you will produce.)

If you have any Organized Play for your game (which D&D does, as does so-called 'living card games' which are based on an advancing storyline), loosened canon makes it easier for those authors to produce content, but simultaneously makes it harder to incorporate the content that players enjoy into the overall game. In addition, the later stories can't take into account all of the potential outcomes that a given group might have taken through a given adventure, so in effect, this turns all adventures into "railroad plots" with respect to the larger campaign narrative, where the best outcome is assumed for each adventure and thus the PCs don't really have the ability to influence the overall metaplot. (This gets complicated, because it necessarily involves different campaign outcomes contesting with one another to become the 'canonical' outcome, which is itself pretty challenging. Regardless, one of the attractions of a 'living campaign' is that the campaign in theory adapts to respond to the actions of the players; a 'living campaign' that doesn't do this is no different than a traditional scripted campaign.)

Perkins's final point in his essay, though, seems just as important to the current 'administration' as any of the other explanations, and that's the quote referenced at the top. In effect, what Perkins is saying is that the 5E team wants to be able to take what they consider 'good lore' and keep in in the game, while revising or outright eliminating 'bad lore'. Again, this seems like a defensible position, but it also has a flip side: it assumes that your changes to the lore are not just lazy or arbitrary, but are made consciously and for specific reasons. This could work well if you actually follow through on your intention, but given the realities of publishing on a schedule, it's inevitable that some amount of lazy or arbitrary decision-making will occur, and in those decisions, you can inadvertently (or allow someone without your knowledge to deliberately) make decisions that harm the canon. The statement seems reasonable, but as we'll discover below, it's actually fundamentally dishonest.

With that in mind, let's explore...

The Curious Case of the Original Women of Ravenloft

The original Ravenloft setting as released in the early 1990s, like the game studio that released it, contained a lot of old white guys, and it didn't necessarily get any more diverse with time. The early 3E Ravenloft product "Secrets of the Dread Realms" by Swords & Sorcery Studios lists eighteen Domains of Dread, half of which were unambiguously run by old white dudes. Depending on how you want to define 'old' and 'white', you could even add a few more domains to the list (such as Verbrek, ruled by the son of the former old white dude darklord, and Markovia, depending on whether you consider Markov to still be human enough to qualify as an old white dude). Only five domains were ruled by female darklords, and one of those (Borca) isn't even wholly ruled by the female darklord. Comparing the darklords of Secrets of the Dread Realms to that of Van Richten's Guide to Ravenloft points out just how much of a priority it was for the 5E team to increase the diversity of darklords in the setting.

Curiously, though, the female characters retained from classic Ravenloft don't appear to have been changed in a manner that fits Perkins's explanation of what they consider when deciding what to bring forward from older lore, as in nearly every case, the character became less interesting and possesses less agency in her current 5E presentation than she did in her original pre-5E incarnation.

Jacqueline Montarri

Let's begin our survey with a character who technically doesn't yet exist in 5E lore, and thus by Crawford's definition doesn't exist in lore at all. It might seem odd to begin my presentation of 'female characters deprived of agency by their 5E presentations' by starting with a character who wasn't presented, but on the other hand, being removed from canon and thus from existence could be argued as the most severe loss of agency possible for a character.

Jacqueline doesn't exist in 5E because the organization she founded, the Red Vardo Traders, doesn't exist in 5E. In older editions, the Red Vardo Traders was both a legitimate trade company as well as a criminal organization engaging in smuggling, assassination, and other crimes, and are based in the Barovian town of Krezk. The version of Krezk presented in Curse of Strahd, however, makes no mention of the Red Vardo Traders, choosing instead to present Krezk as a small village dominated by the Monastery of Saint Markovia*, a location that does not exist in pre-5E Ravenloft. The Red Vardo Traders were founded by Jacqueline for a specific purpose, and thus both their legitimate business operations and their criminal pursuits are but shells for their true purpose: to find Jacqueline Montarri's head.

* - Saint Markovia himself was initially presented in the late 3E reboot adventure "Expedition to Castle Ravenloft", as one of the inhabitants of Castle Ravenloft's crypts; Markovia was changed from a man into a woman as part of Curse of Strahd, and the Sanctuary of First Light, the largest church of the Morninglord in Ravenloft pre-5E and placed in Krezk by its developers, was re-written in Curse of Strahd as the Monastery of Saint Markovia.

Montarri sought the secret of eternal youth, and in doing so, consulted with the Vistani seer Madame Eva to find it. Eva originally resisted, but finally revealed that the secret rested within the library of Castle Ravenloft, and Jacqueline, out of a desire to be the only possessor of such a secret, out of a need to do evil, or perhaps both, murdered Eva before departing for Strahd's castle. Unfortunately, Jacqueline's infiltration of Castle Ravenloft attracted Strahd's attention, and she was captured, turned over to the villagers in Barovia, and beheaded for her crime against Strahd. However, some of Eva's fellow Vistani asked to take custody of the body, explaining that the woman had murdered their leader, and Jacqueline eventually awoke -- wearing Madame Eva's head. She since learned that she could 'wear' the decapitated heads of others, and cannot survive long without one. Jacqueline's body has not aged, but her head ages a year for each day she wears it, requiring her to continually murder (and possibly assume the identities of those she murders) to survive while she searches for her original head, the only thing that can break the curse that Eva's kin placed upon her.

That's a pretty amazing backstory, and one I'd think would be very worth including in a new Ravenloft setting, save for one problem: Madame Eva's death. Now this isn't actually a big problem in the context of classic Ravenloft: both Eva herself and her tribe of Vistani were known to have a 'curious' relationship to time (former Ravenloft writer John W. Mangrum explicitly called Madame Eva a "time traveler" when it was pointed out that Eva's continued existence in Ravenloft canon suggested that she had not actually been killed), but it did cause confusion among those with a more static approach to continuity. Since Eva unambiguously exists in 5E Ravenloft, being referenced in both Curse of Strahd and Van Richten's Guide to Ravenloft, it appears that the decision to jettison Jacqueline and her Red Vardo Traders comes mainly from a desire to untangle that confusing bit about Eva actually being dead but still walking around.

Granted, the need for an organization like the Red Vardo Traders is perhaps less significant in a Ravenloft where the Core doesn't exist and every domain is its own Island of Terror, but given that Van Richten's Guide to Ravenloft still lists a number of organizations known to be capable of travel between domains, including two that they just invented out of whole cloth, it would seem as though making use of a pre-existing organization might have worked just as well. The other complicating factor is that Montarri is not herself a darklord; with the focus of the 5E Ravenloft experience on darklords as linchpins of the setting, having a compelling NPC who isn't a darklord (but who honestly could be made into one fairly easily, as her curse lends itself to a darklord's punishment and her formation of the Red Vardo Traders into her way of dealing with the limitations of being a darklord) would seem to detract from what the 5E designers were trying to do with the setting.

But this isn't the only or even the worst example of a female character deprived of her agency in the new regime...

Gabrielle Aderre

Unlike Jacqueline, whose elimination from Ravenloft seems like an editorial red pen taken to an otherwise merely irritating issue, anyone familiar with Gabrielle Aderre's backstory realized that her background would have to change significantly given the changes to the Vistani in Van Richten's Guide to Ravenloft.

In pre-5E Ravenloft, the Vistani were an exotic human culture of outsiders, driven by their heritage and abilities to make their own way within the Domains of Dread, and having developed mysterious abilities and customs to protect themselves from its dangers. Non-Vistani were viewed with suspicion, to the point where the Vistani had a specific word ("giorgio") for non-Vistani, and those who chose to breed with non-Vistani and their offspring were frequently outcast from Vistani culture. Female Vistani were often gifted with 'The Sight', a precognitive or divination ability, but the Vistani took great pains to ensure that no male children were born with The Sight, lest that child grow up to be a prophesied doom-bringer known as a Dukkar. (One such seer was Hyskosa, whose legendary prophesies eventually led to the Great Conjunction which nearly tore the realms apart.) Because of their separation from mundane society, more traditional settlements tended to fear the Vistani, especially their rumored skill with fashioning deadly curses when wronged, and though Vistani would often trade with such settlements, they were never truly welcome in them; ultimately, the Vistani would follow their wanderlust and move on, leaving even more strange tales and confusing lore in their wake.

Van Richten's Guide to Ravenloft changed all that. Now, the Vistani are simply a sprawling human culture who "refuses to be captives of a single domain, the Mists, or any terror." Their abilities are no longer unique -- there are a number of Vistani who "possess the Mist Walker Dark Gift" that can be taken by any character -- though they are said to "understand how to employ Mist Talismans" with their "traditional magic". Instead of being seen by others as mysterious outsiders, now "the news and goods Vistani bring ensures a genuine welcome" from more traditional settlements, and only "more dismal communities view Vistani with suspicion"; likewise the Vistani themselves no longer refer to non-Vistani as "giorgio", nor do they seem to have any issues with those of mixed Vistani blood traveling or dwelling among them. Most significantly, the legends of the Dukkar no longer exist, with both male and female Vistani serving as spellcasters "with many favoring divination magic for the practical help if provides in avoiding danger." In fact, Hyskosa is no longer a lost seer prophesying the doom of the Dread Realms, but "a renowned poet and storyteller" who is alive and leads his own caravan of Vistani through the Mists.

Given all of this, Gabrielle's pre-5E backstory would need to change quite drastically. Gabrielle's mother was half-Vistani, and possessed enough of The Sight to prophesy that Gabrielle could never seek to have a family or tragedy would be the inevitable result. Learning to hate the Vistani based on her mother's incessant refusal to acknowledge her desires for a family, Gabrielle eventually abandoned her mother during a werewolf attack, fleeing into Invidia where she was captured and brought before the darklord, who sought to enslave her to command her exotic sensuality. Instead, Gabrielle made use of the traditional Vistani "evil eye" to paralyze the darklord, murdering him and assuming his lordship over Invidia. Not long after, Gabrielle was visited by a 'mysterious gentleman caller', after which she discovered she was pregnant, eventually giving birth to a boy who proved to possess The Sight. Delighted that she had managed to give birth to a Dukkar, she failed to realize how quickly the boy grew or how powerful he proved to be until her son, Malocchio, usurped her throne (but not the dark lordship of Invidia) and cast her out of his court. Though there are definitely some problematic things in this story, it's not so terrible that it couldn't still serve as the foundation of a tragic Darklord's origin.

In Van Richten's Guide to Ravenloft, Invidia is detailed among the short descriptions of "Other Domains of Dread", and her pre-5E backstory has been utterly thrown out. There's no indication of how Gabrielle became darklord of Invidia, who the father of her child is, or anything from pre-5E lore. Instead, Gabrielle has become one of the parents from the story of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory -- a rich, bad mom convinced of her child's greatness and willing to accept anyone who supports that story while turning a blind eye to her child's misbehavior and cruelty toward his servants and teachers.

Pre-5E Gabrielle wasn't ideal, but at least she had a drive: she wanted a family, and refused to accept that her desire could not overcome the inevitable grinding wheel of fate. 5E Gabrielle arguably isn't even evil, just supernaturally deluded (ironically, her main flaw is her blind acceptance of the rightness of her own privilege), so it's not even clear why she rather than Malocchio is the darklord of Invidia. Rather than wanting a thing she can never have, 'modern' Gabrielle assumes she has a thing that doesn't exist, and is less a tragic figure desperately trying to assert her own agency than a deluded puppet, acting out a part in a drama that makes no sense. Granted, as we noted above, some degree of Gabrielle's old backstory would need to change to accommodate the other changes to Ravenloft lore as part of the 5E transition, but the decision to simply throw out the old Gabrielle and turn her into a character who isn't even aware of her own lack of agency in her situation is, in its own way, even more tragic than Gabrielle's original pre-5E story.

Isolde

Isolde is a fascinating character, because she was created after the Carnival, the group she leads in Ravenloft lore. In pre-5E Ravenloft, the Carnival was the Carnival l'Morai, run by a sinister being known as the Puppetmaster. The events that led to the Carnival breaking free of the Puppetmaster's influence are detailed in the 1993 Ravenloft novel "Carnival of Fear". Then, in the 1999 supplement "Carnival", John W. Mangrum and Steve Miller take the Carnival l'Morai and introduce them to Isolde, a mysterious woman who joins the Carnival and assumes the role of its leader and protector. Much of the internal story within the supplement itself involves the theories that many of the other characters have about who Isolde is and where she comes from, and how various aspects of the Carnival, such as the Twisting (a change that comes over those who remain with the Carnival for any signficant amount of time and seem to bring hidden or secret traits to the surface as exotic abilities or mutations), relate to her. In the end, though (spoiler alert!), Mangrum and Miller reveal Isolde's true backstory -- she is a chaotic good ghaele eladrin who voluntarily chose to enter Ravenloft in pursuit of a fiend named the Gentleman Caller (thus the Carnival supplement is also the origin of the Caller, one of the signature non-darklord villains of the setting). The Twisting is revealed to be a side-effect of Isolde's 'reality wrinkle'; as an outsider, Isolde can re-make reality in a short distance around her, and one of the ways she does this is by bringing someone's inner self out and making it visible to others. Honestly, if you wanted a domain or group whose underlying reason-to-exist seems tailor-made for a modern RPG audience, it would be one where having your inner self revealed to the world, one that you've been taught is freakish and strange, proves to be beautiful to those who accept you.

But that's not what we got in Van Richten's Guide to Ravenloft, perhaps because of the book's insistence on page 6 that "Nowhere Is Safe". Instead of the 3E ghaele eladrin, Isolde is now just an eladrin, a 4E planar elf variant. Instead of entering Ravenloft and finding the Carnival l'Morai in need of a leader and protector, she was manipulated first by a powerful archfey into leading a fey carnival, then inexplicably decided to swap carnivals with a different carnival run by a group of shadar-kai through the Shadowfell, even going so far as to accept the intelligent (and evil) sword Nepenthe, who is the actual darklord of the Carnival.

Again, as with Gabrielle, some simplification of Isolde's backstory was probably inevitable, as the original backstory made use of very specific Ravenloft mechanics that the 5E version simply doesn't want to deal with (mainly Isolde's 'reality wrinkle' which drives the Twisting). But not only did the designers take a character who had explicitly chosen both to enter Ravenloft in pursuit of the Gentleman Caller and to take leadership of the Carnival to serve as its protector and changed her into a character who is manipulated into doing everything she does that gets her into Ravenloft (and leaves her no memory of how or why she got there), the designers didn't even decide to keep Isolde as the most significant character in Carnival, allowing the sword Isolde carries to take that starring role.

Oddly, a lot of the changes to Isolde's story are reminiscent of the classic Ravenloft story of Elena Faith-Hold and how she became the darklord of Nidala in the Shadowlands, which suggested to me that perhaps at one time the Shadowlands were not going to be included in Van Richten's Guide to Ravenloft, and the changes to Isolde's story were meant to be a call-out to what would be the missing story of Elena. But the Shadowlands also exist as an "Other Domain of Dread", so in the end, the changes to Isolde served no real positive purpose.

Interlude

It's worth taking a moment to contrast the characters above with the domains in Van Richten's Guide to Ravenloft that gained female darklords who didn't have female darklords previously:

Dementlieu, formerly ruled by Dominic D'Honaire, is now ruled by Saidra D'Honaire; it is hinted but not stated explicitly in Saidra's backstory that she is not actually related to the former darklord, but simply assumed the family name as part of her assumption of the rulership of Dementlieu, in which the Grand Masquerade must be maintained above all else.

Falkovnia, formerly ruled by Vlad Drakov, is now ruled by Vladeska Drakov; Vladeska's backstory makes it plain that she is a female re-skin of the original Vlad Drakov, himself a character from the Dragonlance world of Krynn. Other than her origin, which is now no longer tied to Dragonlance, her backstory is largely the same as her predecessor's, save that instead of the dead rising to battle Drakov's attempted invasions of their northern neighbor, Darkon, now the dead rise to reclaim Falkovnia itself from Vladeska's attempt to 'pacify' it.

Lamordia, formerly ruled by Adam, the creation of the mad doctor Victor Mordenheim, is now ruled by the mad doctor Viktra Mordenheim; Victor's hubris in his attempt to create life are matched by Viktra's attempts to defeat death.

Valachan, formerly ruled by Baron Urik von Kharkov, is now ruled by Chakuna; in one of the few backstories in Van Richten's Guide to Ravenloft that acknowledges a former darklord, Chakuna's backstory is that she had to become a monster (a were-panther, specifically) to defeat a monster (a panther who was polymorphed into a man as part of a revenge plot, fled from the Forgotten Realms into Ravenloft upon realizing what he was, where he was transformed into a vampire...look, not every convoluted backstory for the old Ravenloft darklords was necessarily a good convoluted backstory).

I'd argue that each of the darklords above retains her agency in Van Richten's Guide to Ravenloft, but it's curious to note that each of those darklords seems to have inherited that sense of agency from her relationship to the male darklord that preceded her, sometimes literally (in the cases of Saidra and Chakuna) and sometimes figuratively (in the cases where Vladeska and Viktra are mainly female re-skinnings of the original male darklords). The designers clearly have the capacity to allow a female darklord to exercise agency and have drive and purpose to her existence, if that drive and purpose was inherited from or inspired by an original male character. If the character was a woman all along, though, then agency and drive and purpose are not really important to the designers, if they can fit that character into the specially designed hole the size of the concept they had for the new domain. Which brings us to the character who I feel was done dirtiest by the designers in moving from classic Ravenloft to 5E...

Jacqueline Renier

Jacqueline Renier is one of the original Ravenloft darklords, tracing her origins all the way back to the original "Black Box" campaign setting released by TSR in 1990. She appears in two different places in that boxed set -- once as the chaotic evil darklord of Richemulot in the Realm of Terror booklet, and in a portrait of the Renier family included as a handout in the box. The Renier family was actually an ancient wererat clan in the world they originally came from, and Jacqueline herself was the granddaughter of the patriarch of the clan, Claude Renier. When the Reniers fled into Ravenloft to escape the justice of their original world, they first appeared in Falkovnia, where they ruled the sewers until finally forced out by Vlad Drakov's troops. Fleeing into the Mists, the Reniers found themselves in the new domain of Richemulot, and Claude found himself the domain's darklord.

Jacqueline proved an eager student in the manipulative ways of her elders, however; both her grandfather, who maintained control over the clan through a combination of coercion and sheer force of personality, and her mother, who murdered Jacqueline's father seemingly only so that Jacqueline and her twin sister would not need to lose the Renier name. Jacqueline learned the game so well that one day she manipulated her own grandfather into his destruction at her hands, so cleanly that no one else in the family dared to oppose her ascension. Jacqueline was now the matriarch of the Reniers, and the ruler of Richemulot.

But 3E Ravenloft added a few additional wrinkles to Jacqueline's backstory. In the Ravenloft Gazetteers, it was revealed that Jacqueline's ambition to assume control of her clan and the domain of Richemulot were not just driven by a desire for power, but in the name of a vision of the future where wererats would reigns supreme over all other humanoids. She began encouraging migration into the largely undeveloped and underpopulated lands of Richemulot, while overseeing work in putrid laboratories to develop the Becoming Plague -- a disease that would transform humanoids en-masse into wererats under Jacqueline's ultimate command. In every speech Jacqueline would give about the glorious future of Richemulot, it was not the future of humanity she was referring to, but rather the coming age of the rat.

Jacqueline's backstory wasn't perfect -- as with other female darklords, she also got saddled with the 'she desperately wants to be loved and is terrified of being alone' trope -- but for the most part, this is a truly impressive backstory. And in our age, a domain featuring an ambitious politician pushing nationalism to motivate her partisans, only for that nationalism to not be what her partisans believe it is would seem to be an extremely fitting template for horror. It would certainly seem possible to re-write the few problematic aspects of her character with more modern tropes; make Jacqueline an 'ace' (asexual) but who still craves romance based on her upbringing and is both attracted to and terrified by anyone who might potentially prove to be her equal, and you've got what I'd consider to be one of the best darklords in the setting.

As you might expect, given Jacqueline's placement on this list, that's not nearly what we got in Van Richten's Guide to Ravenloft.

Instead, Jacqueline was born as a noblewoman within Richemulot, and was quick to notice that the rise of the bourgeoise would threaten the power of the nobility and lead to their diminution in society. Jacqueline's grandfather was not the charismatic, sadistic mastermind of a clan of wererats, but an aging nobleman growing infirm in his old age, and he proved unable and/or unwilling to work to change things, so Jacqueline would need to be the person to reverse her family's fortunes and the decline of the nobility in society. Not by doing anything herself, mind, but rather by trying to find an organization of nobles working to maintain the supremacy of the nobility. Finding them, she learned too late that they were secretly a society of wererats when she was forcibly made into one of them, but she quickly adapted, rising to command both the rat and wererat populations before finally unleashing a plague -- the Gnawing Plague -- upon the populace. Rather than converting the population into wererats, the Gnawing Plague just killed them, and when the people begged Jacqueline and the nobles for aid, Jacqueline made helpful noises but did nothing useful (it's not recorded if she uttered the words "Let them eat cake," as she watched the peasants die). Her 'torment' as a darklord is that she wants to return to the privileged life she had as a noblewoman, but can't, as the need to supervise the creation of new, more virulent plagues and unleash them to keep the peasantry from revolting and overthrowing the nobility prevents her from building the kind of society that would actually support a thriving nobility.

Instead of a domain where we have seen the future and humanity has no place in it, we have a one-percenter using every ounce of her privilege to stay above the ranks of the peasants she despises. Instead of an intelligent, ambitious planner capable of executing long-range goals flawlessly, we have a vapid, shallow socialite yearning to return to her days as a debutante. As villains go, Jacqueline has fallen a long, long way from her portrayal in pre-5E Ravenloft.

Probably the most offensive part of the redesign of Richemulot as 'the plague domain' is that we've spent over nineteen months living through a plague of our own, and the kind of horror that is presented as Richemulot's primary adventure cycle, the Cycle of the Plague, bears almost no resemblance to the reality we've lived through. Van Richten's Guide to Ravenloft presents a world where common people are to be feared, and authorities abuse their power to heartlessly quarantine the sick to stop the disease from overtaking everyone, yet say nothing about the horror of those who refuse to accept that the plague exists, or who profiteer from bizarre 'cures' and treatments. The designers present Richemulot as an example of 'disaster horror', where "the world has fallen into ruin -- or it's getting there fast," when the domain could be an example of the most classic of all horror tropes: humans are the most horrible of monsters.

Thus, the final quote leading this essay. It's not my place to argue that the folks who wrote Van Richten's Guide to Ravenloft are good or bad writers, and as Raymond Chandler noted, it's not really necessary. After all, "[t]he poor writer is dishonest without knowing it, and the fairly good one can be dishonest because he doesn't know what to be honest about." And ultimately this entire drive, to try to distance the product from the mistakes of the past by also distancing it from its successes, all while presuming that one can correct the deficiencies of the past without committing mistakes that, in hindsight, will seem just as obvious to our successors: that undertaking is fundamentally dishonest. The people writing, editing, and publishing Dungeons & Dragons today grew up on the old tropes that are now being rejected as no longer being relevant, as unnecessary complexity, as potentially harmful, without realizing that the harmful bits aren't just what was written down, but what was learned, such as a woman's motivation and agency meaning little unless they correspond with those of a man.

Yes, there's a lot of stuff published before 2014 that seems bad to us today that, for whatever reason, didn't seem bad to us back when it was published, read, and became part of our fictional worlds. But there's also no reason to assume that process ended in 2014. Update the lore where it's needed, but realize that the process never ends, even with the lore you're writing today to replace it.

#dnd

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imagineclaireandjamie · 4 years ago

Text

Shielded. Chapter Three

Anonymous said to imagineclaireandjamie:

Trojan horse.

Week 1(War and Peace)i:

Monday came around quickly. The amount of sleep she had managed to achieve felt like something of an accomplishment considering what little else there was for her to do.

Feeling brave she gathered herself up and began an exploration of her new home. She recalled the features that Jamie had detailed to her on the Saturday morning before she’d fallen into a light coma for the next 30 odd hours. First, she started with the basement. Recalling the moment in Home Alone where Kevin had been forced to face his own below-ground nemesis, she took the steps carefully, the popular scene repeating over and over in her head until she actually came face to face with a harmless looking space.

As described, there was a washing machine and a dryer -the funnel used to expel the warm air from the back leading up and out of a tiny window near the ceiling- as well as several boxes stacked high in the corner. With not much else to view, she noted the cupboard which contained all the powders and conditioners she’d need and returned to the kitchen.

She’d never really been into cooking before, but despite this she thought the massive aga with its shiny maroon front looked extremely professional. It was, however, so clean she didn’t think it had been used much before. With Jamie working odd and long hours, she presumed it was more likely that he lived on cold snacks and microwave meals.

Looking in the large American-style fridge, she found an assortment of basic produce. What looked like a bottle of unpasteurised milk (most likely bought in himself) and some homemade butter lay in the door alongside a batch of freshly laid eggs. It all seemed fairly self-replacing and she smiled at the idea that one could live completely unaided in the middle of the Highlands if you knew how (or lived with someone else who did).

The freezer, as she expected from inspecting the contents of the fridge, contained a whole host of bagged and sealed meats - enough protein to keep a whole family afloat for months.

Closing the door, she pulled a stack of post-it notes from her pocket and penned a reminder. Seeing all the produce he’d got neatly tucked away reminded her of her teenage years.

Having lost her parents young, she had grown up travelling the world with her uncle and along the way she had gathered herself some producing and growing skills, mainly vegetables and greens, but useful nonetheless. Aiming to reinvigorate her knowledge of horticulture, she wrote:

“Ask about potential vegetable patch/greenhouse…CB”

Placing it on the front of the fridge, she admired the initials she’d signed off with. It hadn’t clicked until she’d come to the end that she could no longer refer to herself with her maiden name and she had hovered over the ‘C’ for longer than normal before sighing and signing with her new pseudonym instead.

Mentally exhausted from overthinking two small letters, she poured herself a glass of water from the tap and continued through into the lounge where she’d sat only hours before with her initial guardians.

It seemed larger and brighter now she actually had the time and a little more energy to view it.

The fireplace was extensive and contained a series of photographs in expressive frames. They must, she thought, have been set up there by someone else.

The first was of a group of young children. Ashamed, she felt badly that she couldn’t pick her host out of the line up. His face and features were still hazy, the only signifier she could recall was the mop of bright red hair that sat atop his head and possibly blue eyes...though she could have been mistaken.

Looking harder, she tried to squint, hoping that might clue her in as to which of the children was Jamie. Giving up, she carried on along the line, smiling as the young girl turned into a young woman. It must be his sister, she pondered, touching the tip of the frame as she looked over the wedding photos. The dress was stunning, the groom looking favourably over at his new bride whilst the crew in the background threw confetti in the air above them.

Picking out Jamie, she noticed his tight smile and high cheekbones. She felt relieved, having not been able to determine who he was in the earlier line-up had made her instantly abashed but at least somewhere in the back of her mind she’d had the forethought to note his defining features in her tired haze.

Towards the back of the ground floor she found a small sitting room. It contained the TV and some rather large overfilled bookcases and looked out over the small garden to the rear. Although she knew she wasn’t supposed to leave the house, she enjoyed -for a moment- sitting on the arm of the chair and looking out across the fields. The sun was still low in the sky and the wind was blowing the long grass gently whilst clouds occasionally masked the sun from view.

The space was enclosed with a waist high stonewall along the top which ran from an outhouse building, to a gate and then on to a covered open-shed arrangement. To the right and behind the shed was a row of rather tall trees. These captured her attention for several minutes as she watched the branches sway and the birds flit in and out of the woodland area. She could almost smell the scent of the spring day and taste the pollen on her tongue as she leaned closer to the window.

It was there she sat for several hours before her stomach growled angrily, reminding her of how little she’d eaten over the weekend.

Making herself a quick sandwich, she wrote out a ‘thank you’ post-it before returning back to her room. She knew Jamie probably wouldn’t be home for a while but the chime of the clock as she’d cleaned up her plate had made her suddenly nervous, as if she couldn’t quite bring herself to make idle conversation yet, and she’d escaped just in case he came home out of the blue to check she was alright.

As it stood, though, he hadn’t and didn’t arrive home until well into the evening. The sun had already begun to set as she put down her kindle at the sound of the door opening and closing.

She knew it was dinner time and the afternoon had passed so quickly that she had barely looked up since she’d returned to her room. Glancing out of the window, she watched the birds fly across the inky blue sky, the orange hue slowly fading as late afternoon turned into evening. Warring with herself, she argued over going down, her mind compromised by her unwillingness to seek out company. She would, after all, have to succumb at some point - it would be rude not to.

Having some form of sixth sense on the matter, Jamie appeared to understand her a little more than she did herself, and for the next few days he allowed her time to adjust and settle.

He would come home at a normal time and, instead of crowding her, he prepared supper, placed hers in the microwave, and then placed himself in the study until bedtime. By the middle of the week she had become accustomed to this routine and would often wait for him to close himself in his own quarters before sneaking back downstairs to eat herself.

As this progressed, her post-it notes become more frequent and she would often add small doodles with large smiley-face stickman on them. Jamie found these endearing, it had been a long time since he’d had anyone else living in the family home and it was a nice surprise to find that he enjoyed it - even if it was only the small noises of Claire moving about that clued him in as to her presence. Stashing the notes in the back of his jeans pocket, he began to collect them, placing them on the pin-board in his small office as he did so.

By the end of the day on Friday he had managed to arrange them into ‘thank you’ notes and ‘question’ notes and had created a set of his own which he aimed to place on the fridge for the following morning. All of these were answers to her queries. Intrigued by her idea for a vegetable patch in the yard, he had returned that specific ask with a list of items he’d ordered from locals and friends which he aimed to have ready for the weekend - this was the one he was most proud of.

“Wire and mesh for coverings, 4 X wooden planks for a raised surround, fertile soil, seeds, glass sheeting to be cut in prep for greenhouse, assorted spring veg selection...JF”

That had been left on Wednesday and he was chuffed to return home in the evening to find a rather large spaghetti bolognaise aside his newest ‘thank you’ note.

Having made the bolognaise she had shyly returned to her room, the message hidden away in her pocket as she’d sat at the desk for the evening to research plant and vegetable growth extensively. There hadn’t been many evenings in her old life where she’d had the time to process alone, and so even though she knew her hobiting away time was coming to an end, she was grateful to have been allowed the week to relax.

Through the use of notes, she had built herself a mental picture of Jamie and his personality. He, at the beginning of the week, had left her meals and then absconded so that she could eat alone, but by the end of Friday their roles had been reversed as she felt he shouldn’t have to take care of her when he’d been out at work all day. She didn’t have a large cooking repertoire, but there were plenty of cookery books hidden in one of the cupboards and she’d taken to reading them to pick out the easier looking recipes to trial.

There had been some mistakes. Some burned pasta (which she hadn’t known to be a possibility until she’d achieved it) but overall it hadn’t been too traumatic.

Peeling open her book, she pulled the post-it -which had now lost most of its stickiness- and ran her fingers over the text. She couldn’t deny how excited she was over the prospect of a garden of her own. The overwhelming thoughtfulness of it was helping to coax her out of her bedroom and she resolved to use the weekend to thank him in person.

As much as she was revelling in their silent, written communications, there was little chance she was (or should be) able to avoid total human interaction for the next 11 weeks. He was going above and beyond for her, changing his own habits whilst she reassessed her life -something few others, she thought, would do for a complete stranger.

With her decision made, resolved to be more social in the morning, she curled up under her duvet with her newest book. Before she knew it, the words were bleeding together, her eyes struggling to remain open as she fell into a dreamless sleep.

#;anonymous #;mod mbd #shielded #Jamie X Claire #ficlet

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shirlleycoyle · 4 years ago

Text

Found: Page 25 of the CIA’s Gateway Report on Astral Projection

Page 25 of the CIA’s “Analysis and Assessment of The Gateway Process” hitched a ride with an email one evening and landed in my inbox. A digital attachment felt like an unceremonious entrance for a document that was produced 38 years ago and has been missing and highly sought after since it was declassified in 2003. For years, people had been filing FOIA requests and speculating about what was on this missing page in the middle of a mind-bending report about military research into astral projection and other dimensions. And then, there it was, just downloaded on to my desktop quietly looking back at me. My immediate reaction was frenetic; I couldn’t chill out long enough to properly read the rogue text. I called a few friends to ensure my reality was synched properly—a telephonic pinch to verify I was awake. All signs pointed to mostly. I double clicked the file.

Let’s get into it.

Screengrab: CIA

A Whirlwind Backstory

I published a breakdown of the CIA’s Gateway Report in February. The classified 1983 document was produced by US Army Lieutenant Colonel Wayne M. McDonnell, with a technical power-assist from mastermind Israeli-American biomedical engineer Itzhak Bentov. The report was declassified in 2003. It packs a tour-de-force investigation into the potential achievability of astral projection into 28 hyper-dense pages. A spectre has hung over the report since. The version released by the CIA was missing what seems to be an extremely crucial page.

IMAGE: SPECTRAL-DESIGN VIA GETTY IMAGES]

For the uninitiated, astral projection is mostly interchangeable with the psycho-physical phenomena of out-of-body experiences and remote viewing. With the right guidance and technologies, astral projectors believe, we can train our consciousness to move beyond the confines of the space-time dimension. This super-ability frees our human minds to travel through the universe, exploring an endless array of normally imperceptible realities and dimensions.

McDonnell states early in the report that his goal was to "construct a scientifically valid and reasonably lucid model of how consciousness functions" in order to put "out-of-body states into the language of physical science to remove the stigma of its occult connotations."

The Department of Defense's ambitions are made clear in the report's conclusion: McDonnell suggests that if the military were to experiment with astral projection, it could find "practical application," but also noted that it should "be intellectually prepared to react to possible encounters with intelligent, non-corporeal energy forms when time-space boundaries are exceeded." It kicked off years of attempts by the US Army to train psychic soldiers to conduct “remote viewing” missions to regions across the world.

Image: CIA

A Cosmic Mystery

The report is a vicious mind labyrinth. For 24 pages, it winds its way through the spiritual and scientific underpinnings, techniques to achieve and potential applications of space-time transcendence. It introduces methodological frames of reference like hypnosis, transcendental meditation, spiritual belief systems, biofeedback, quantum physics, and universal holograms only so that its intended audience—CIA top brass—might merely begin to grasp its (and our) bigger reason for being. By the bottom of page 24, McDonnell reaches a full existential crescendo, broaching the very nature of reality itself. It’s a cliff-hanger:

Image: CIA

And then … the report skips to page 26.

As if he hadn’t just side-stepped revealing the secrets of the heavens, McDonnell is on to a set of pragmatic “Motivational Aspects” for why the CIA might employ the Gateway as opposed to other methods of achieving astral projection.

Image: CIA

Expediency Wayne? Really?

Since the report's declassification, countless FOIA requests have been filed demanding page 25’s release. In every instance, the CIA has denied they ever had it in the first place. Page 25, then, has been the holy grail not just for would-be astral projectors, but also for conspiracy theorists, government transparency activists, and people who have simply read the report and found themselves maddened by this missing information.

Image: CIA Foia response

One fantastic internet theory maintains that McDonnell omitted the page intentionally. If someone could successfully astral project they’d be able to tell him what’s on it.

Contact

The CIA did not invent the Gateway Report and the Gateway Experience on its own. It used teachings from a man named Robert Monroe, who later founded an organization called The Monroe Institute.

Four days after we published the first article about the Gateway Report, I received a note from The Monroe Institute. They had some ideas for a follow-up piece. Drowning in responses to the article though, I failed to return their email. They reached out again. This time their message was more concrete: Sitting buried in the Monroe Institute archives in Faber, Virginia, was page 25 of The Gateway Report. But it didn't come to us easily.

Our first scheduled phone call included The Monroe Institute’s CEO, COO and marketing division. Motherboard Editor-in-Chief Jason Koebler and I got on a Google Hangout.

In that call, the Institute said that they had Page 25. People had been trying to obtain the report from the CIA and had repeatedly failed. But no one had bothered to ask them for the report; they'd had it all along. At one point, they described the report as having been "in a barn," unexamined, for all of these years. Otherwise, the call was uninspired. The CEO didn’t show. After an hour run-around it became evident that The Institute wasn’t going to part with Page 25 without some carefully orchestrated marketing plan. The words of COO Lori Jacobwith made their purpose clear, “We’re attempting to capitalize on some of the enthusiasm by a market that isn’t our normal age group.”

The institute was hoping to tap into the popularity of our first article, as well as some viral TikToks about the report.

The call ended with “You’ve touched on some things we are not talking about right now.”

The Institute then went quiet. Time passed.

One evening, the Monroe Institute’s Director of Marketing & Communications Jenny Whedbee emailed again. She'd been silent on our last call. The email contained the full Gateway Report including the missing page. She wrote that they’d just “went through a major org change.” The CEO and COO were no longer with the company. She was now down to talk, after we had read page 25.

The Missing Page

In the true spirit of discovery, I am pleased to present the full uninterrupted report in all its glory.

The page opens with the word “Absolute.” It sits there authoritatively, as if guarding the gate to the rest of the text. In the broader context of the report the term is applied to both spiritual belief systems and quantum physics alike. It's an important word.

Physicists define time as a measurement of energy in motion. In this way, time is really a measurement of change. In order for that motion to occur though, it must be limited inside a larger vibratory pattern. Inside this framework it is limited, contained at a specific location. That confinement then makes it distinguishable from other locations in space. Uncontained energy is force without limit. Imagine a formless entity speeding through the galaxy with no friction to hold it back from being everywhere. As McDonnell puts it “There is no 'here' to differentiate it from 'there.'” And this, my friends, is an absolute state or “The Absolute.”

According to the report, the Absolute is essentially the governing energy of the Universe en masse. It powers the universal hologram that is all of entirety. The report makes multiple attempts to visualize this universal hologram or “cosmic egg” as one big constantly flowing spiral.

Screengrab: CIA

Between the reality we know and The Absolute are countless intervening dimensions, McDonnell writes, which is pretty trippy stuff for a government report. Absolute is the ceiling (as far as we know it). End of the line, and a hell of a way to open a missing page.

McDonnell observes that a “stylized representation” of this spiral is present in every religious system in history. He cites the specific examples of Christianity’s Holy Spirit, the Hellenic world’s labyrinth, the Hebrew Tree of Life, its Hindu counterpart, and the Chinese Spiral Through the Four Powers. This thinking has found its way into each systems’ teachings.

The crucial distinction between the breakthroughs in modern physics and the epiphanies of religious thinkers is the way they all found The Absolute. Whereas physics leans on quantitative research, religions relied on intuition. The Gateway then sort of showed up just in time—a holistic mainline for “interfacing” with the universal hologram, freeing us from the limitations of a left brain logic-based culture.

The page’s third section takes a slant which should feel familiar to adherents of modern psychology. The universe, the Absolute, the cosmic egg. All of it is irrelevant, and certainly unreachable, until we possess knowledge of ourselves. My eyes, upon first glance of page 25, picked up “The Absolute” first, then darted swiftly to the aphorism McDonnell trots out here— “Know Thyself.” What hits even harder than achieving a psychological self-understanding, according to McDonnell, is the sense of self-perception achieved when one can manage to alter their state of consciousness to the point where the universal hologram itself can be perceived.

And it’s The Gateway Experience, McDonnell says, that promises this possibility.

Images: The Monroe Institute

Achieving Hemi-Sync

Key to the report and technique for achieving astral projection is an audio technology developed by Robert Monroe, a radio broadcasting executive who, in the 1970s, built an R&D division inside his company solely to study the effects of sound on human consciousness.

In a series of self-experiments in which he exposed himself to carefully calibrated audio frequencies while sleeping, Monroe repeatedly achieved elevated mind-body states. His 1971 book Journeys Out of The Body documents those early investigations and officially coined the term “out-of-body experience.”

Books by Robert Monroe

Monroe’s corporate R&D division eventually became The Monroe Institute, which produces tapes containing audio techniques to stimulate brain functions and achieve “Hemi-Sync.” Hemi-Sync is short for hemispheric synchronization, and is instrumental in achieving a state of consciousness in which the electrical brain patterns of both left and right hemispheres are equal in amplitude and frequency.

It does so by combining two techniques. The first is Frequency Following Response—a recognized external frequency is introduced by headphones, which causes the brain “to try to mimic the same frequency by adjusting its brainwave output.” For instance, a resting brain that hears a Theta level will shift out of its Beta level. The second technique is beat frequency. Contrasting frequencies are introduced to each ear. The brain then “chooses to “hear” the difference between them.” A brain receiving 100hz through the right ear and 104hz through the left, can then detect the delta, in this case a 4hz frequency. The technique then opens the brain to “a variety of frequencies which are played at a virtually subliminal, marginally audible level.”

With the left brain relaxed and the body in a virtual sleep state, according to the report, the conditions are ideal to promote brainwave outputs of higher and higher amplitude and frequency. When the wave pattern of a consciousness drops below an oscillation frequency of 10 to the power of -33 centimeters per second, for a brief instant it “clicks out” of space-time and joins infinity. Monroe’s theories maintain that if that “click-out” can achieve continuity you can begin dialoguing with other dimensions.

Image: CIA

The Monroe Institutes’s chief engineer today is Bob Holbrook. A former events producer, Holbrook believes the Monroe Institute's audio offerings helped him rehab from head trauma sustained in a brutal car accident. The Hemi-Sync technology featured in The Gateway Report was sold to a company now called Hemi-Sync®. The audio technology stack The Institute now produces—collectively called Monroe Audio Support (MAS)—is a hugely evolved version of the original binaural beats-based technique. As Bob puts it, “Binaural beats was just one technology, now we have 50.” This widens and populates the spectrum of experience for participants. “MAS takes the idea of binaural beats and utilizes many other “colors” and technologies to create more intense experiences in different levels of consciousness.” A key MAS ingredient is gamma synchrony. “It allows us to connect much more easily to 'all that is,'” he said. Two additional innovations play a central role—Phase Modulation and Amplitude Modulation. Phase Modulation changes the direction from which a sound feels like it’s coming from. Bob shared an audio-visual animation illustrating sound source oscillation.

Amplitude Modulation gives technicians the capability to drop into the soundscape live and manipulate specific aspects of the volume.

The Institute shared a 30-minute sample of their newer programming for this article. Headphones are essential for full results.

The Monroe Institute’s tapes combined these frequencies with subliminal suggestions from Monroe himself. An archive titled “The Explorer Series” contains recordings of the Monroe Institute Research Division’s experiments, in which subjects “report from these non-physical environments.”

Up until COVID, all meditators physically travelled to The Monroe Institute’s palatial headquarters in Faber, Virginia to work through a series of increasingly challenging levels. The 7-day course offers the possibility for one’s consciousness to navigate space, time, and beyond. That is, if you’ve got what it takes.

It’s these tapes and their potential applications that caught the attention of the CIA and prompted the commission of the report.

The Monroe Institute Today

After I read page 25, I called Jenny Whedbee back up.

She said Monroe is an organization that was trying to find its way in an ever-shifting world. “There’s a part of this organization that definitely needs to grow, but it needs to grow at a pace that keeps with the tenets of who we are,” she said. The importance of listening to where an organization comes from before deciding on a future was a theme. “If you don’t have the input from people who have been here a while, then you’re not really staying true to what the Institute is.”

Paramount to staying that course is the guiding light of its influential founder Robert Monroe. “We’ve had a lot of executives come and go. I know Robert Monroe is still here and still trying to run things,” she said.

It’s this pioneering energy that powers her enthusiasm. In reference to their newer classes, she explained, “Gateway Voyage is primarily the same exact program that Robert Monroe developed. And so is Lifeline, Exploration 27, Guidelines. Those core programs, he actually worked on and developed.”

“It puts you into direct experience with expanded states of consciousness where you can explore and ask questions and receive answers and visit past lives," she said. "You can astral travel.”

These programs are grueling. Participants go through five or six exercises a day for five straight days. “It’s like running a marathon,” she said.

Jenny joined the company without much experience in consciousness elevation but swiftly got the feel for things. “It did exactly what the course said it was going to do," she said. "I experienced past lives. It gave me this 20,000-foot view of my life. Not just this one, but previous and future.”

“If you want the rocket ship where your life is forever enlightened, you’re not going to get that any other way than coming here,” she said.

The conversation with Jenny eventually turned to page 25.

“I have my own interpretation," she said. "Whether it was accidentally or intentionally left out I don’t know. Like I said there are people that work in this place that are on another plane and not here in the physical.”

For Jenny, the page appeared at the right time and place. “I feel like 20 years ago the world wasn’t ready to hear. But this generation is ready.” She says the institute changed her life.

“You grow up, you go to school, you get married, you have kids, you go to church, you die," she said. "And your life lives on through your family. There is value there. But on a much deeper level it’s the relationships and the memories you create. Not all this stuff we’re collecting. So what if that page was released 20 years ago? Could it have backlashed? Cause it talks about religion and that all religions are equal. And what if people feel really powerfully that not all religions are equal. I feel like the generations nowadays, they’re not so wrapped up in that anymore."

Jenny said that young people today are pushing for social justice and are more open to different perceptions of consciousness and different ways of living. "There’s this whole thing going on where people are awakening," she said. "People become more conscious, people become more awakened—tearing down the monuments in Richmond. Enough’s enough. This has come about at a time when your generation has questions and they want to know and they’re ready to hear the answers without judgment.”

“TikTok happened, you happened, all this happened for a very important reason that’s not of this physical plane,” she said.

Jenny concluded our hour-long conversation with a suggestion for how to handle page 25. “Do something with it. You know even if it’s you just saying what it means to you.”

[Hold my beer]

A Consciousness Feedback Loop

The Gateway Report is so dense in parts, it compromises its own accessibility. The goal of my initial synthesis was to create a written and visual experience (including, ahem, some premium custom graphics) that might help folks without a PHD in quantum physics benefit from its huge thinking.

It struck a nerve.

Over the course of a 3-week period, millions of readers made their way through an admittedly arduous editorial obstacle course. Studios reached out.

Two days after the article’s release, we inserted an invitation:

“Have you had an experience with The Monroe Institute, Hemi-Sync or had an out-of-body experience? Get in touch: [email protected]”

Thousands of emails came in from folks all over the world who described their out-of-body experiences. To me, it signaled the possibility that many of us are searching for something more than what seems currently available. To describe my experience in telling this story and the search in many senses, I produced a visual reinterpretation of page 25.

The Gateway. Image: Thobey Campion

'The Gateway' is a high-resolution digital image of a print of the missing page 25 of the CIA's Gateway Report. It contains 659 digital micro-inscriptions of out-of-body experience accounts, that only become visible at 300%+ magnification.

Just look closer.

Thobey Campion is the former Publisher of Motherboard. You can subscribe to his Substack here.

The Gateway is an NFT. Part of the proceeds go to Mind Science, a foundation that explores the mystery of human consciousness by funding the work of early-career neuroscientists.

Found: Page 25 of the CIA’s Gateway Report on Astral Projection syndicated from https://triviaqaweb.wordpress.com/feed/

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straykidsupdate · 5 years ago

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STRAY KIDS INSPIRE THEIR GENERATION TO PICK UP THE MIC

K-POP’S YOUNG DISRUPTORS NAVIGATE ADULTHOOD ALONGSIDE THEIR FANS

Stray Kids are fighting with their fans to determine who adores the other most. The fans started it, erupting into an impromptu chant inside Microsoft Theater in downtown Los Angeles: "We love you! We love you!," they shout, repeatedly. The sound is deafening, catching the boy band off guard. The eight members retaliate with their own impassioned chorus. "We love Stay," they respond, referencing their legions of international devotees. Both sides scream until, ultimately, Stray Kids admit defeat; they stand awkwardly onstage, apparently unsure how to receive the unrivaled adulation. Bang Chan, the Korean group's steadfast leader, looks around the venue in awe, while sensible vocalist Seungmin makes a heart with his hands and points to the crowd, resolved to have the last word.

This is not the first time Stray Kids has lost the battle of who-loves-who. It’s happened in cities across the United States, from New York to Dallas, amidst their District 9: Unlock world tour. It's canon, chiseled into the group's short but colorful history, alongside such viral moments as "Seungmin in the building" and "I'm not gonna leave you behind." Displays of affection between idols and fans are nothing new but, with Stray Kids, they’re never forced.

"It doesn't matter how old you are," Bang Chan tells the crowd mid-show, intensity building with every word. "It doesn't matter if you're a boy or a girl, or whoever you choose to be. It doesn't matter where you're from — everyone is welcome in our special district."

Two weeks prior to this performance, Stray Kids — Bang Chan, Lee Know, Changbin, Hyunjin, Han, Felix, Seungmin, and I.N — are gazing from a conference room in a Times Square skyscraper. The sky is gray, but that doesn't deter Hyunjin from posing for a series of selfies against the floor-to-ceiling window. As the lithe dancer works his angles, his bandmates are scattered throughout the room. Han props his phone against the room’s A/V controls to watch an anime; Bang Chan hunches over his own phone, thumbing the screen intently; Lee Know rests his eyes; and Australia-born Felix gossips about last night's Grammy Awards. Like any teen, he's obsessed with Billie Eilish, and her historic Grammys sweep is hard for him to fathom. "Can you believe it?" he says, eyes wide and sparkling. "She's only 18. It's amazing."

But at 19, the deep-voiced rapper, whose delicate features betray his cherry-red hair, has similarly found success at a young age. Within a year of their 2018 debut, Stray Kids received 11 rookie awards and released five EPs. In fact, while Eilish and her brother Finneas were crafting homemade beats in a Highland Park bedroom, JYP Entertainment's tenacious boy wonders were honing their own unique sound in a small studio in Seoul, South Korea. Members Bang Chan, Changbin, and Han comprise the group's primary production trio, 3RACHA, and they've been making music together since their trainee days in 2017. Introspective early tracks like "Start Line" and "Runner's High" laid the foundation for Stray Kids' sonic identity: With the disruptive power of punk, they deliver astute, poignant lyrics about the bristly experience of growing up and its side effects.

"The things we worry about and the things Stay worry about — we share a lot of the same struggles," Han tells MTV News. "Even though our ambitions are different, we work hard just the same. It becomes our inspiration musically." As the creative force behind two of the group's more vulnerable cuts, "19" and "Sunshine," the 19-year-old rapper reveals his innermost thoughts and anxieties to the fans. But that honesty can be frightening.

"It's nerve-racking for us," Bang Chan says. "Sometimes we think, 'If we talk about this, will people understand? Will they relate?' We're always thinking about how we can reach people through our lyrics because we want our music to help."

That empathy has been woven throughout their music from the beginning. Stray Kids’ first singles, the pre-debut track "Hellevator" and the darkly riotous "District 9," are full of angst and aggression, soundtracks for those who balk at societal pressures and follow their own rules. "My Pace" is an empowering anthem teeming with energy and affirmations. ("Don't compare yourself with others," Bang Chan sings on the hook. "It's OK to run slower.") Songs like "Voices" and "Side Effects" offer an intimate glimpse into the tumultuous mind of a young person still figuring out their place in the world, while "Miroh" and "Victory Song" are bursting with big sounds and youthful bravado.

youtube

"Young people today may feel a bit trapped, like you're constantly being told what to do and you feel like you can't speak for yourself," Bang Chan says. "So we want people our age to feel comfortable speaking out and talking about what they think."

By encouraging their fans to examine their own growing pains, to feel everything, they ensure that their message is never didactic. "All strayed steps come together to make a new road," they say at their concert. And with their latest release, "Levanter," off their sixth EP Clé: Levanter, Stray Kids come to the understanding that the journey is more meaningful than the destination, and the path ahead is ultimately theirs to define. So they double knot their shoelaces and dash full-speed ahead. "We might not know what the actual goal is, but as long as we're running hard and we're running as a group, whatever comes is going to be good anyway," Bang Chan says. "We just wish that a lot of people out there could listen to our music and get a lot of energy and hope from it."

Like 25-year-old Selina, who connects to their lyrics because she's "still on that journey of figuring out what I want to do and who I want to be," she says, clutching her Stray Kids light stick (a compass, now featuring Bang Chan's name written on the handle) outside of Microsoft Theater. Her friend Joseline, 18, likes that the members "have other priorities and interests outside of being a K-pop idol" that they reveal through daily Instagram posts, livestreams on the V Live app, TikToks, and weekly YouTube videos and vlogs. "He's not just Han from Stray Kids, he's Han Jisung — rapper, producer, and person," she adds.

For Kambree, 17, the group has a "positive vibe" that makes her feel happy and accepted. "They make us feel like family, no matter who you are or what you look like," she adds. Her best friend Lexxie, 17, says Stray Kids "make me feel like I'm not alone with my issues." And So Yun, 30, finds their mix of "hard-hitting EDM" and "super angsty" lyrics reminiscent of the emo bands she listened to in high school. "It's the same rebellious spirit that I felt as a teen when you want to be your own person and figure out your own voice."

Their music has given Louis, 30, a newfound perspective. "I like the ['Levanter'] lyric, 'I want to be myself, I don't care' — that line resonates with me because we live in a society where people try to mold you, but at the same time, I just want to myself and at this point, I really don't care!"

Best friends Ella and Jazlynn, both 19, met online through their mutual love of Stray Kids, and they've customized their light sticks with glitters and holographic stickers of their favorite members' names. "Half of the group is technically my age, so I can look at them and see how successful they are, and it gives me inspiration to work harder," Jazlynn says, an I.N banner at her side. And while they do feel comforted by the authenticity in the group's songs, as Ella explains, it's who they are off-stage that many fans connect with most. "When you see Felix do the Renegade, it's like, 'I do that too!'"

Their ability to ignite the stage with powerful performances while staying true to themselves behind the scenes — as both K-pop's reigning meme kings and young men navigating adulthood — is what makes Stray Kids so relatable to a generation that experiences much of their lives online. "This generation is comfortable being alone," Changbin says. "We have our phones. We don't always need to be talking to each other to be together. Sometimes a text is fine."

And they're pretty normal, too. Bang Chan and Changbin watch videos from Tomorrowland and Ultra Music Festival to help clear their minds in the studio; the tracks "Road Not Taken" and "Stop" are the direct results of such self-care. Han's idea of a perfect day would be to "not come out of my room for 24 hours." If he could spend all day watching YouTube videos, he would. In fact, he says "Sunshine" was inspired by a scene in the Korean drama Boys Over Flowers, where the main characters travel to an idyllic private island. Though Han’s larger-than-life presence dominates the stage, he identifies as an introvert and admits he hopes to "overcome" his shyness. "On my ideal perfect day, I'd try new experiences and meet new people comfortably," he says. "You can do it!" Bang Chan adds, encouragingly.

Youngest member I.N makes time to go shopping, though he prefers to "chill" on his days off. And when Felix isn't playing video games or destroying kitchens with Seungmin, he frequents Seoul's finest dog cafes. "We have so many dog lovers in our group," he says, smiling. "I've been looking at a lot of dogs, and I feel like they help you feel better. I really want a dog with the team." Jisung points at Seungmin, whose nickname is "puppy," and Bang Chan adds, "We already have one." Seungmin scrunches his nose and says, "No way!" (But Han insists he's a "really bad boy.")

Meanwhile, Hyunjin, who’s known by fans for his theatrics and commanding stage presence is extremely open with his emotions. He frequents V Live, where he offers personal advice to viewers of his video series Hyunjin’s Counseling Center. But the 19-year-old admits that opening up to Stay has helped him, too. "I don't always have a lot of confidence," he says. “When I want to be comforted or when I’m feeling kind of sad, Stay are really good at consoling me. I want to be able to repay that comfort in full."

"The connection between Stay and Stray Kids would be family," Felix adds. Han jokes that they're the "annoying and mischievous" little brothers. But it's that sense of connection, among the group as well as with their fans, that has cemented Stray Kids as the vital voices of their generation.

"The struggles we're going through — anxiety, stress, school, love — they tell us to take our time and see where our path leads," Selina says. "It's OK to stray from it. Just stay true to yourself. I always associate that with them. The idea of 'You Make Stray Kids Stay' is to find out what it is that grounds you and just keep going."

And Stray Kids don't plan to slow down any time soon. Having wrapped their Clé series at the end of last year with Levanter, 2020 offers an exciting fresh page for new musical experimentations, starting with the three original unit songs the group produced for the tour. "Wow" is a sexy R&B track from dancers Lee Know, Hyunjin, and Felix. It's also their first explicit love song. "We wanted to try a sexy song because it's a special stage," Hyunjin says, explaining that the dancers worked on their own lyrics in addition to helping with the slinky choreography. "We wanted to include moves that we haven't tried before," Lee Know adds, noting that they wanted something sexy and powerful. "So it was a new experience."

"My Universe," featuring vocalists Seungmin and I.N with an assist from Changbin, is a bright pop ballad. "I always wanted to try something like that," I.N says, eyes smiling. Seungmin tells Changbin from across the table, "Thanks for helping." And 3RACHA's "We Go" oozes confidence over a scorching trap beat. "We made 'We Go' last time we were here [in the United States]," Bang Chan says. "We made around three to four songs in one day… The performance is really fun as well. And those two [he points to Han and Changbin] got to have the chance to use Autotune live."

They also released their first English singles in January, a process that rapper Changbin, known for his furious flow, calls "difficult." ("It was fun," Hyunjin argues beside him.) "I was listening to Changbin's rap [in 'Double Knot'] like, 'Why is this so fast? What am I going to write?'" Bang Chan says. "I tried to write it as easy as possible so that he could speak it well. I'm really glad that they could record it really well for me."

In March, they'll debut in Japan. And there's another mixtape project in the works, kicked off by the digital release of "Gone Days," a relaxed, Autotune-laced anthem for the "OK Boomer" generation. A play on the Korean word kkondae, it describes someone who pushes outdated ideas and expectations onto another based only on their age and status — and signals the arrival of a bold new direction. "I think [young people] now just need to be more comfortable with themselves," Bang Chan says of his inspiration for the track. "By being yourself, you never know what's going to happen."

"I always believe that one person can change the world," he adds. "So if you have a thought or an idea, just let it out. Because who knows? You can make the world a much better place."

#stray kids #200227 #ot8 #era: clé levanter #t: article #MTV News

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constantviewings · 5 years ago

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Stranger Things 3 - Full Season Review

Stranger Things is an American science fiction horror web television series created, written and directed by the Duffer Brothers and released exclusively on Netflix. The third season, titled Stranger Things 3, premiered on July 4 2019.

Spoiler warning for seasons 1, 2 and 3 of Stranger Things. Also, this review is extremely long. Don’t say I didn’t warn you...

It’s 1985 in Hawkins, Indiana, and summer’s heating up. School’s out, there’s a brand new mall in town, and the Hawkins crew are on the cusp of adulthood. Romance blossoms and complicates the group’s dynamic, and they’ll have to figure out how to grow up without growing apart. Meanwhile, danger looms. When the town’s threatened by enemies old and new, Eleven and her friends are reminded that evil never ends; it evolves. Now they’ll have to band together to survive, and remember that friendship is always stronger than fear.

What I Did Like:

Production Design The visual aesthetic of this season is unlike either of the previous seasons. The garish colours and abundance of neon lighting firmly cements the shows’ events in retro culture. This season also incorporates one of my favourite film-making tropes, juxtaposing the good and bad with extreme contrast (e.g. playing an upbeat song over harsh imagery).

Character beats are given the appropriate amount of significance What I mean by this is, that at several points throughout Stranger Things 3 expositional beats for several characters aren’t made into bigger events than necessary. Three examples of this include both Will and Robin being ‘revealed’ as gay and Will and Jane (Eleven) professing their love for each other.

Formatting and Storyline Progression This season follows four separate storylines that converge to three midway through the season. All of these storylines are weaved together in a way that you can tell which events are happening simultaneously and which aren’t. Though this format does present a slight issue, as the episodes progressed and more was happening I found it increasingly harder to know how much time had passed between scenes; this was most prevalent with Steve, Robin, Dustin and Erica in the underground bunker.

Dacre Montgomery’s Performance When Billy was introduced in Season 2, he was a mostly two-dimensional character with the slightest backstory with his abusive father and step-sister Max. In Stranger Things 3, Billy is the main protagonist and the primary host of The Mind Flayer and thus is involved in some particularly impressive scenes showing how he became the person he is and his love for Max. Dacre Montgomery did an amazing job this season, but I truly worry that the majority of fans will neglect that to either keep over-praising Millie Bobby Brown or obsessing over minor characters.

Progression of Existing Characters Stranger Things 3 spends a decent amount of the first few episodes further developing characters that otherwise weren’t in previous seasons, notably Max and Lucas. For the most part I appreciate this, but there is a negative aspect to it that I will explain further on.

The Hospital Fight In episode 7, Jonathan, Nancy and all the kids (minus Dustin) go to the hospital to continue investigating. What follows is a pretty good fight scene where the abilities of the ‘flayed’ are displayed and a smaller version of the The Mind Flayer is revealed. Though Stranger Things is no stranger to strobe lighting, the harshness of it in this scene was somewhat bothering.

What I Didn’t Like:

This isn’t the final season The endings of season’s 1 and 2 acted both as solid conclusions, but also left enough open so that they could continue the show and gave the audience a glimpse into the next season. The ending of Stranger Things 3 is simultaneously the best and worst ending of the entire show. It is the best because it perfectly wraps up every characters established storyline and with everyone moving into a new phase of their lives. But, with that being said, the mid-credits stinger that teases the next season left me with an unsettling feeling in my gut that the fourth, and potentially final, season will drag out a story that doesn’t need to continue.

Will’s Character Will Byers was my favourite character from the beginning of season 1 and Noah Schnapps’ performance in season 2 truly lived up to the expectations placed upon him due to his small presence in the first season. So why didn’t they do anything with him in Stranger Things 3? Will spends the first two episodes wanting to play D&D and spends the next six episodes doing nothing but touching the back of his neck and saying “he’s here”. The Duffer Brothers truly did Noah Schnapp, and the audience, dirty by neglecting one of the most talented actors in the cast.

The Overabundant Product Placement If you think the constant appearances of Eggo waffles were annoying in the first two seasons, you will hate the inappropriate amount of product placement in Stranger Things 3. My main issue is that it’s not subtle at all, and I understand that that’s the point, but in the first two seasons all the product placements are seamlessly incorporated so that they’re not as noticeable. The same can’t be said about Stranger Things 3 where they have a minute long debate about New Coke.

Millie Bobby Brown’s Acting Millie Bobby Brown was highly praised for her ‘outstanding’ performances in the first two seasons of Stranger Things. So much so that she received twenty-one nominations and nine awards for Stranger Things alone. This fact doesn’t sound as impressive when you add that all she did in the first two seasons was look like she was concentrating and utters a maximum of five hundred words across both seasons; which is a very small number given most humans say at least seven thousand in a day. Her characters developed speech skills means that in Stranger Things 3 she is given a larger role, the only issue being that her skills as an actress don’t live up to her reputation. I don’t mean to say that she is a bad actress, she just isn’t the ‘young superstar’ that her reputation implies.

General Thoughts:

Jane or Eleven? At the end of Stranger Things 2, Eleven’s name was legally changed to Jane Hopper. So why now, at least six months after the end of season 2, are her friends still calling her Eleven? I am aware this is a minor nit-pick, but why bother showing the audience that her name is now Jane Hopper if the characters aren’t going to use it?

The Flayed I was worried that the Flayed were going to be too similar to zombies, but I am extremely happy that they didn’t go down that path.

It is more censored than any previous season

Never-Ending Story I truly can’t decide whether I love or hate that they take minute out of the seasons climax to sing The Never-Ending Story…

Cary Ewels You can never go wrong with Cary Ewels portraying a corrupt leader.

Will’s Artistic Abilities I truly appreciate that Joyce’s mention of Will’s drawing talents is something that has been incorporated and featured in every season.

I’ll conclude this review by stating that, while I enjoyed seasons 1 and 2, the two year gap between releases did result in a slight loss of interest in the series on my part. I will also state that Stranger Things 2 is my favourite season out of the three, excluding episode 8, and I am still unsure whether season 3 ranks above or below season 1 in quality; though I do lean towards it ranking higher. With all this being said, Stranger Things 3 is a great season of television that I definately enjoyed watching.

#TV Review #Netflix #Stranger Things #Stranger Things 3 #Stranger Things Spoilers

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programmingisterrible · 6 years ago

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Repeat yourself, do more than one thing, and rewrite everything

If you ask a programmer for advice—a terrible idea—they might tell you something like the following: Don’t repeat yourself. Programs should do one thing and one thing well. Never rewrite your code from scratch, ever!.

Following “Don’t Repeat Yourself” might lead you to a function with four boolean flags, and a matrix of behaviours to carefully navigate when changing the code. Splitting things up into simple units can lead to awkward composition and struggling to coordinate cross cutting changes. Avoiding rewrites means they’re often left so late that they have no chance of succeeding.

The advice isn’t inherently bad—although there is good intent, following it to the letter can create more problems than it promises to solve.

Sometimes the best way to follow an adage is to do the exact opposite: embrace feature switches and constantly rewrite your code, pull things together to make coordination between them easier to manage, and repeat yourself to avoid implementing everything in one function..

This advice is much harder to follow, unfortunately.

Repeat yourself to find abstractions.

“Don’t Repeat Yourself” is almost a truism—if anything, the point of programming is to avoid work.

No-one enjoys writing boilerplate. The more straightforward it is to write, the duller it is to summon into a text editor. People are already tired of writing eight exact copies of the same code before even having to do so. You don’t need to convince programmers not to repeat themselves, but you do need to teach them how and when to avoid it.

“Don’t Repeat Yourself” often gets interpreted as “Don’t Copy Paste” or to avoid repeating code within the codebase, but the best form of avoiding repetition is in avoiding reimplementing what exists elsewhere—and thankfully most of us already do!

Almost every web application leans heavily on an operating system, a database, and a variety of other lumps of code to get the job done. A modern website reuses millions of lines of code without even trying. Unfortunately, programmers love to avoid repetition, and “Don’t Repeat Yourself” turns into “Always Use an Abstraction”.

By an abstraction, I mean two interlinked things: a idea we can think and reason about, and the way in which we model it inside our programming languages. Abstractions are way of repeating yourself, so that you can change multiple parts of your program in one place. Abstractions allow you to manage cross-cutting changes across your system, or sharing behaviors within it.

The problem with always using an abstraction is that you’re preemptively guessing which parts of the codebase need to change together. “Don’t Repeat Yourself” will lead to a rigid, tightly coupled mess of code. Repeating yourself is the best way to discover which abstractions, if any, you actually need.

As Sandi Metz put it, “duplication is far cheaper than the wrong abstraction”.

You can’t really write a re-usable abstraction up front. Most successful libraries or frameworks are extracted from a larger working system, rather than being created from scratch. If you haven’t built something useful with your library yet, it is unlikely anyone else will. Code reuse isn’t a good excuse to avoid duplicating code, and writing reusable code inside your project is often a form of preemptive optimization.

When it comes to repeating yourself inside your own project, the point isn’t to be able to reuse code, but rather to make coordinated changes. Use abstractions when you’re sure about coupling things together, rather than for opportunistic or accidental code reuse—it’s ok to repeat yourself to find out when.

Repeat yourself, but don’t repeat other people’s hard work. Repeat yourself: duplicate to find the right abstraction first, then deduplicate to implement it.

With “Don’t Repeat Yourself”, some insist that it isn’t about avoiding duplication of code, but about avoiding duplication of functionality or duplication of responsibility. This is more popularly known as the “Single Responsibility Principle”, and it’s just as easily mishandled.

Gather responsibilities to simplify interactions between them

When it comes to breaking a larger service into smaller pieces, one idea is that each piece should only do one thing within the system—do one thing, and do it well—and the hope is that by following this rule, changes and maintenance become easier.

It works out well in the small: reusing variables for different purposes is an ever-present source of bugs. It’s less successful elsewhere: although one class might do two things in a rather nasty way, disentangling it isn’t of much benefit when you end up with two nasty classes with a far more complex mess of wiring between them.

The only real difference between pushing something together and pulling something apart is that some changes become easier to perform than others.

The choice between a monolith and microservices is another example of this—the choice between developing and deploying a single service, or composing things out of smaller, independently developed services.

The big difference between them is that cross-cutting change is easier in one, and local changes are easier in the other. Which one works best for a team often depends more on environmental factors than on the specific changes being made.

Although a monolith can be painful when new features need to be added and microservices can be painful when co-ordination is required, a monolith can run smoothly with feature flags and short lived branches and microservices work well when deployment is easy and heavily automated.

Even a monolith can be decomposed internally into microservices, albeit in a single repository and deployed as a whole. Everything can be broken into smaller parts—the trick is knowing when it’s an advantage to do so.

Modularity is more than reducing things to their smallest parts.

Invoking the ‘single responsibility principle’, programmers have been known to brutally decompose software into a terrifyingly large number of small interlocking pieces—a craft rarely seen outside of obscenely expensive watches, or bash.

The traditional UNIX command line is a showcase of small components that do exactly one function, and it can be a challenge to discover which one you need and in which way to hold it to get the job done. Piping things into awk '{print $2}' is almost a rite of passage.

Another example of the single responsibility principle is git. Although you can use git checkout to do six different things to the repository, they all use similar operations internally. Despite having singular functionality, components can be used in very different ways.

A layer of small components with no shared features creates a need for a layer above where these features overlap, and if absent, the user will create one, with bash aliases, scripts, or even spreadsheets to copy-paste from.

Even adding this layer might not help you: git already has a notion of user-facing and automation-facing commands, and the UI is still a mess. It’s always easier to add a new flag to an existing command than to it is to duplicate it and maintain it in parallel.

Similarly, functions gain boolean flags and classes gain new methods as the needs of the codebase change. In trying to avoid duplication and keep code together, we end up entangling things.

Although components can be created with a single responsibility, over time their responsibilities will change and interact in new and unexpected ways. What a module is currently responsible for within a system does not necessarily correlate to how it will grow.

Modularity is about limiting the options for growth

A given module often gets changed because it is the easiest module to change, rather than the best place for the change to be made. In the end, what defines a module is what pieces of the system it will never responsible for, rather what it is currently responsible for.

When a unit has no rules about what code cannot be included, it will eventually contain larger and larger amounts of the system. This is eternally true of every module named ‘util’, and why almost everything in a Model-View-Controller system ends up in the controller.

In theory, Model-View-Controller is about three interlocking units of code. One for the database, another for the UI, and one for the glue between them. In practice, Model-View-Controller resembles a monolith with two distinct subsystems—one for the database code, another for the UI, both nestled inside the controller.

The purpose of MVC isn’t to just keep all the database code in one place, but also to keep it away from frontend code. The data we have and how we want to view it will change over time independent of the frontend code.

Although code reuse is good and smaller components are good, they should be the result of other desired changes. Both are tradeoffs, introducing coupling through a lack of redundancy, or complexity in how things are composed. Decomposing things into smaller parts or unifying them is neither universally good nor bad for the codebase, and largely depends on what changes come afterwards.

In the same way abstraction isn’t about code reuse, but coupling things for change, modularity isn’t about grouping similar things together by function, but working out how to keep things apart and limiting co-ordination across the codebase.

This means recognizing which bits are slightly more entangled than others, knowing which pieces need to talk to each other, which need to share resources, what shares responsibilities, and most importantly, what external constraints are in place and which way they are moving.

In the end, it’s about optimizing for those changes—and this is rarely achieved by aiming for reusable code, as sometimes handling changes means rewriting everything.

Rewrite Everything

Usually, a rewrite is only a practical option when it’s the only option left. Technical debt, or code the seniors wrote that we can’t be rude about, accrues until all change becomes hazardous. It is only when the system is at breaking point that a rewrite is even considered an option.

Sometimes the reasons can be less dramatic: an API is being switched off, a startup has taken a beautiful journey, or there’s a new fashion in town and orders from the top to chase it. Rewrites can happen to appease a programmer too—rewarding good teamwork with a solo project.

The reason rewrites are so risky in practice is that replacing one working system with another is rarely an overnight change. We rarely understand what the previous system did—many of its properties are accidental in nature. Documentation is scarce, tests are ornamental, and interfaces are organic in nature, stubbornly locking behaviors in place.

If migrating to the replacement depends on switching over everything at once, make sure you’ve booked a holiday during the transition, well in advance.

Successful rewrites plan for migration to and from the old system, plan to ease in the existing load, and plan to handle things being in one or both places at once. Both systems are continuously maintained until one of them can be decommissioned. A slow, careful migration is the only option that reliably works on larger systems.

To succeed, you have to start with the hard problems first—often performance related—but it can involve dealing with the most difficult customer, or biggest customer or user of the system too. Rewrites must be driven by triage, reducing the problem in scope into something that can be effectively improved while being guided by the larger problems at hand.

If a replacement isn’t doing something useful after three months, odds are it will never do anything useful.

The longer it takes to run a replacement system in production, the longer it takes to find bugs. Unfortunately, migrations get pushed back in the name of feature development. A new project has the most room for feature bloat—this is known as the second-system effect.

The second system effect is the name of the canonical doomed rewrite, one where numerous features are planned, not enough are implemented, and what has been written rarely works reliably. It’s a similar to writing a game engine without a game to implement to guide decisions, or a framework without a product inside. The resulting code is an unconstrained mess that is barely fit for its purpose.

The reason we say “Never Rewrite Code” is that we leave rewrites too late, demand too much, and expect them to work immediately. It’s more important to never rewrite in a hurry than to never rewrite at all.

null is true, everything is permitted

The problem with following advice to the letter is that it rarely works in practice. The problem with following it at all costs is that eventually we cannot afford to do so.

It isn’t “Don’t Repeat Yourself”, but “Some redundancy is healthy, some isn’t”, and using abstractions when you’re sure you want to couple things together.

It isn’t “Each thing has a unique component”, or other variants of the single responsibility principle, but “Decoupling parts into smaller pieces is often worth it if the interfaces are simple between them, and try to keep the fast changing and tricky to implement bits away from each other”.

It’s never “Don’t Rewrite!”, but “Don’t abandon what works”. Build a plan for migration, maintain in parallel, then decommission, eventually. In high-growth situations you can probably put off decommissioning, and possibly even migrations.

When you hear a piece of advice, you need to understand the structure and environment in place that made it true, because they can just as often make it false. Things like “Don’t Repeat Yourself” are about making a tradeoff, usually one that’s good in the small or for beginners to copy at first, but hazardous to invoke without question on larger systems.

In a larger system, it’s much harder to understand the consequences of our design choices—in many cases the consequences are only discovered far, far too late in the process and it is only by throwing more engineers into the pit that there is any hope of completion.

In the end, we call our good decisions ‘clean code’ and our bad decisions ‘technical debt’, despite following the same rules and practices to get there.

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ukreview-blog · 6 years ago

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Projectsdeal UK Reviews

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What Is Project Management and Why Should You Care

We can define internet based project administration as an online application, comprising of quite a lot of programs and processes used for dealing with the varied phases of a mission in a systematic way over the internet. It entails many processes, which embody scheduling, monitoring, useful resource allocation, funds administration, price management, communication, administration programs, documentation and quality administration.

Challenge administration software program solutions may also help one management every of those actions from anyplace on the earth by way of the web. The online primarily based utility does not have to be downloaded or put in on a computer as it is accessible online. It's hosted on the server and acts as a multi-user system, which signifies that plenty of folks worldwide can work on it at the similar time. Thus, this helps one take care of the density of a lot of projects, saving their time in addition to money.

The web-based mostly project management functions are much more secure than desktop functions. A standard desktop software saves your total information on personal computers, laptops or transportable laborious drives, which may both get stolen or crash. Moreover, it is very tough to maintain the system updated with the most recent security updates and patches.

On the other hand, a web-based challenge management utility keeps your delicate project knowledge not solely extremely projectsdeal review safe but also updated and backed-up on a regular basis by a state-of-the-art safe on-line information centre.

As the appliance runs online, one doesn't should face any operating system compatibility points. All you need is an web connection and one of many internet browsers. Just open the web browser, enter the URL Wikipedia Here and you can start working in your venture from any place in the world. This makes it very handy for organizations having multiple offices, situated in numerous regions of the world, to remain related.

Based on the most recent know-how, this net based mostly system helps to take care of every single side of the project administration. It performs a significant position by assigning tasks to the members of the staff related to the challenge whereas protecting a check on their performance always.

Your undertaking supervisor can assign you duties anytime and anywhere. By simply logging in, you may get instant updates on the project assigned to you. It makes it a lot easier for the challenge manager to manage the project and collaborate with all the staff members and the purchasers on the same time. It makes communication a lot easier among the many members, regardless of their different geographical areas.

So, an online-based mission management system may also help you take care of all the elements of your online business. It does not matter whether or not the project deals with event administration, marketing, information know-how, finance or any other subject. You can easily discover a system greatest appropriate to your wants. By opting for an online-based challenge administration system, you possibly can preserve examine and balance for all your projects by submitting them on time and throughout the prescribed budget.

The enterprise of developing websites is an actual challenge however working with giant client firms and retaining management over large initiatives is another task in itself. This text examines https://ukreview.co.uk/projectsdeal-co-uk-reviews.aspx some of the pitfalls of doing internet design work for bigger firms and suggests some approaches which you can undertake to keep tighter control over your internet design initiatives.

Coping with giant net design purchasers is harder that one might think. For a begin a larger company means more middle managers and advertising people to fulfill and except you retain YOURURL.com tight control over the mission from the beginning, shoppers of this nature can run you ragged with switching the purpose posts, adding in new necessities and conflicting requests.

Having said this, working with larger purchasers is normally far more profitable than working with smaller firms so it's often value the additional effort in holding the bigger initiatives underneath management.

The first step in maintaining tight control is to have a extremely tight website specification in place earlier than the location is started. Additionally it is work taking the time to ensure the clients really understand what you'll deliver after they signup. I have seen venture spiral out of control due to the abscence of a properly outlined specification. One other thing to look out for is ambiguity in a specification. If it may be argued that a degree in a specification document means one thing else then there is a actual chance that you will have to alter the website which in the end means extra improvement time and less profit.

A real drawback when dealing with bigger companies is one thing known as 'function creep'. Feature creep is when a shopper sees a demo of a website at a assessment stage, has a brainwave and says - "oh i really like that, but can we just change...". I have seen this occur numerous times in the last few years. I call them 'can you simply...' requests.

A properly outlined spec will act as your protect towards this particular situation. When you've got yourself coated by a decent specification, you can give one in every of my very own favorite solutions - "after all we can, we are able to make it do anything, would you like us to put a quote collectively for the change." You by no means agreed to do the change so why do it for free simply because Mr Large Client has asked you. Its not Mr Large's fault - he didn'y consider it till now. Should you had a builder contracted to do an extension to your property you would not dream of asking him "oh i really like that - but it will be better should you may add an additional room over here", you might be in tight management keep in mind so why stand for it on your venture?

Another massive problem with coping with giant firms is dealing with a lot of totally different folks. There is nothing mistaken with taking in the views of many people, the issue is when folks on the same firm start to contradict each other. For instance, Person A may request a blue background then individual B might request a crimson one! The place does that go away you? It leaves you with both a telephone name or an assumption to make. And we all know that making assumptions over consumer necessities is just not good!

Another thing to watch out for is having extra that one shopper spokes person at kickoff meetings. I've lost depend of the number of hours I've misplaced in conferences listening to purchasers resolve on their requirements on my time fairly that where the choices ought to have been made - earlier than they arrived at my workplace!

To help with this case, a really simple and useful thing that you are able to do is to insist on having one level off contact for each shopper firm. This works nicely as a result of their spokes individual is responsible for collating the views of all of the individuals concerned with the website venture. When meetings are held they're much extra productive as a result of their necessities have already been decided and the message comes throughout much clearer allowing you to get issues right for the consumer the primary time.

Typically, the management division is considered the most complex entity of a company because it defines the rules and goals of a business, while functioning as a centralizing unit that sets into movement the entire job circuit. When speaking about tasks (which have a decided start and completion date), the duties of the project administration seem to extend significantly because its important targets, which are scope, time and price range seem reasonably constraints.

Since the administration of a challenge deals with key processes (akin to coordination of human and bodily sources, design and supervision of activities, optimization of inputs in accordance with the outputs, cost estimates, functionality of systems and work-circulation, and many others) a substantial amount of interest was set for facilitating and improving it. Thus, there's the traditional technique which focuses on the phases of the mission (that's initiation, planning, execution, monitoring and controlling, and finalization) and adopts a sequential strategy cause why it's also called the waterfall mannequin. By some means conversely with this traditional technique, the challenge-based administration methodology emphasizes the importance of human interaction and malleability of processes for a profitable managing.

Then, there is important path which focuses on human and physical resources and the intense challenge management that is designed for large projects, but lacks in course of molding and human interface. Each methods rely on this system evaluation and assessment method which is somewhat appropriate for large-scale, non-recurring projects. The event chain methodology, as its name suggests emphasizes the recognition, classification and determination of events and events ranges which can affect the schedule and value of a mission.

A more structured and complete challenge administration methodology is PRINCE 2. This strategy is predicated on the division of every process with particular objectives and activities into essential inputs and Projectsdeal UK Reviews outputs. PRINCE2 primarily assists the group of personnel and actions, offering perception within the design course of and supervision methods, and also upholds control resolution for schedule deviations.

Altogether, whatever the line of work of the venture (construction, engineering, telecommunications, military, and so forth) a whole administration strategy by itself shouldn't be achievable. Therefore, the most suitable choice for a clever, supportive, and pragmatic methodology seems to be the fusion of the above-mentioned or other confirmed approaches by the use of an integrating net based mostly administration system. The software program system you choose for a handy and expedite managing of your venture has to be targeted on instruments and providers. This must be a system that may do the give you the results you want, yet not take over your job. So, search for structured web based techniques which incorporate a sequence of packages and functions and make sure that what you select is definitely what you need and, also what you get!

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aroworlds · 7 years ago

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Aro-Spec Artist Profile: Alex

Today I have the delight of introducing Alex, better known to aro-spec Tumblr as @arotaro and @mutant-jojos!

Alex is a bisexual, half-Puerto Rican multi-disciplinary aromantic artist and creative with severe ADHD. You’ll find her prolific fanworks on AO3 as EmeraldTrash666, writing primarily for the JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure fandom. Her bold, colourful art for the JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure, Fullmetal Alchemist, Hetalia, Pokemon and Vocaloid fandoms is also available on Redbubble under the name StellaHagane.

She writes, she creates digital art and she dabbles in music, sewing and fashion design, single-handedly proving that there’s no such thing as too much creative awesome for any one aromantic!

With us Alex talks about finding the word aro, the power of fandom and creative fanworks, her love of aro Jotaro, the challenges of creating with ADHD, the struggles of being an aro gen writer in fandom and the importance of expressing our aro headcanons. Everything she says is absolutely on point, so please let’s give her all our love, encouragement, gratitude, kudos and follows for taking the time to explore what it is to be aromantic and creative.

Can you share with us your story in being aro-spec?

I guess in some ways my “story” starts out pretty typical. Got older, kept waiting for my First Crush™, never got it, started worrying and trying to force myself to develop crushes. I actually was in a relationship with another girl on a forum I was part of as a teenager, but eventually I realized that I didn’t really like her romantically, and the relationship started to become really unpleasant for me. I eventually felt so miserable that I didn’t even want to talk at her at all, even though we were close friends, but I didn’t want to break up with her - partly because I didn’t want to hurt her feelings, partly because we were everyone’s “OTP” and I didn’t want my friends to hate me for ruining that. But eventually I did break up with her, and I’m happy to say she took it with grace and we’re still close friends today! (She’s ace and a great writer/artist herself, too!)

I was part of a very nice LGBTQ+ group as a teenager, but I could never figure out my identity. I felt really ashamed and alone. Whenever I brought up how messed up I felt because I’d never had a crush on anyone, everyone was like, “Oh, sounds like you must be asexual!”, but I knew I wasn’t, and that was the worst part. Even though I knew aromanticism was a thing, nobody ever talked about it. It was only ever in the context of aroaces, so I didn’t know I was aro. I thought I must have had some sort of mental illness or something, but certainly not a legitimate orientation, nothing to be proud of like everyone else.

During that time, I found myself connecting on a deep emotional level to characters like Alphonse Elric, Fujiwara no Sai, the X-Men in general (although I’ve been an X-Men fan since I was literally a baby), basically anyone who was somehow “different” from the rest of humanity, even though I never understood why, since I was a fairly privileged kid who had never experienced much bullying or anything. Weirdly enough, it was Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure that helped me realize I was aro and come to terms with it; I saw an interview with Hirohiko Araki, the author of JJBA, where he was asked what type of girls Jotaro Kujo likes, and replied that he didn’t think Jotaro liked girls. The obvious interpretation would be that Jotaro’s gay, but somehow, one way or another, I decided to go with the idea that Jotaro’s aromantic. Jotaro also happened to be a character I really related to for reasons I couldn’t quite articulate, so around the time I was 18 I put two and two together and was like ... oh shit…

Please click keep reading to continue Alex’s story!

Can you share with us the story behind your creativity?

I’ve always been weird in the way I’m very creative, but tend to kinda bounce around from hobby to hobby. Other people draw, or write, or sing, while I draw for a month, and then write for a month and sew for a week and play video games for a week, and then I draw some more, and then I try out something completely new, and then I write again. I think it must be an ADHD thing, idk. In any case, I’ve just always been really passionate about making stuff, whatever that stuff happens to be.

I’ve also always been very much fandom-oriented. Ever since I was a toddler, I used to dictate fanfiction to my mom (back then it usually involved Winnie the Pooh, the Powerpuff Girls, Godzilla, and my dog). I mostly draw fanart. I find that I’m not really capable of writing original stories, but I’m great at getting fanfics in character, and I love writing them. I love taking stories I already love and reinterpreting them, seeing what it would be like if the characters were put into different situations, etc.

Because of my ADHD, I really struggle with actually finishing things. I try really really hard, I really do, and I’ve been trying to push myself even harder these past few years. I’ve made progress, but it’s still extremely difficult, so I’m very sorry for all the projects I’ve abandoned over the years. Sorry I still haven’t finished the fic that was supposed to be done in early March. I’m trying, really. I promise I’m working on the next chapter of BLaD, too.

Are there any particular ways your aro-spec experience is expressed in your art?

Of course, pretty much everything I write is gen. Even if I include romantic relationships in my fics, I never write about romance, just stories which also happen to include some characters who might be dating someone. And obviously I always write Jotaro as aro! That’s really important to me. No matter which AU I’m writing, he’s always aro. (And autistic, but that’s off topic.)

I’m also not really into shipping because of my romance repulsion, but I ship Joseph Joestar and Caesar Zeppeli. The thing is … I’ve always viewed it as a unique relationship, sort of difficult to define as being strictly romantic or platonic or sexual, just kind of their own thing that defies words. That’s how I’ve always written it. I had the sudden realization recently that this strange view on the only ship I really actually like (at the moment, anyway) is probably due to my being aro, lmao.

What challenges do you face as an aro-spec artist?

People don’t read gen fics, and people aren’t interested in aro stories. That’s just the way it is. I do have some dedicated readers, whom I love deeply, but in general… I could post something with a deep plot, something funny and dramatic and witty and touching, something I poured my heart and soul into for months, and it’ll get very few hits/comments/kudos, while someone else could post the same generic 2,000-word romance fic everyone’s seen a dozen times over, with no editing or anything, and get twice the amount of traffic my fics do in half the time. It’s really crushing.

How do you connect to the aro-spec and a-spec communities as an aro-spec person?

I dunno… The aro community feels so small. Online, I have a small circle of aro mutuals who all kind of vent collectively, and I’m part of Arocalypse and a few aro/aspec Discord servers, but I still feel like there isn’t really much of a larger community to be part of in the same way that there is for other orientations. Offline, I’ve never met another aro, or even anyone who actually knows what aromanticism is prior to me explaining it to them.

I also don’t feel like there’s a very unified “aspec community”. As an allo aro, I feel very rejected by the ace community - not to say that I feel like I should be part of the ace community, since I’m not ace, but I feel like they throw aros under the bus a lot. I mean, we’ve all seen the “asexuals can feel love, just like anybody else! … oh, except for aroaces, I guess. But the rest of us are normal, so you should accept us!” rhetoric. Both within and outside the aspec communities, aros are rarely treated with the same priority as aces, even though we’re arguably in a much more difficult position than your average allo ace.

That being said, I’m glad there is an aro community at all. I don’t know where I’d be now if I were still questioning. Probably not in a very good place.

How do you connect to your creative community as an aro-spec person?

As I mentioned, there’s a general lack of interest in gen fics or sympathy for romance-repulsed people in general. It’s really difficult being romance repulsed in fandom spaces, because nobody cares about anything other than ships. There are very few gen fics, and even less that are a decent length, not abandoned, or cater to my specific interests, so I have to write my own. I don’t often have anything good to read; most of the big fics, the ones with cool plots and long word counts and ongoing updates, are ship fics. If I’m lucky, maybe two gen fics will be posted in one week, and maybe one of them will be longer than a few thousand words. Maybe one might even have my favorite characters. But usually genfics are few and far between, and kind of random in terms of what you’ll get. Sometimes I get so bored that I read ship fics anyway, and then I always wind up feeling really awful afterwards.

I’ve written, over the course of the past two years alone, over 20 gen fics. But whenever I vent that sometimes I’d like to actually get to read something, I always get someone telling me, “Well if you want gen fics, write some yourself! You have to make the change! You can’t demand people write stuff for you!” And of course, at the same time it’s totally acceptable to request ship fics from your favorite author, and if you complain that there aren’t enough fics for your rarepair, it’s seen as relatable and totally valid.

Fandom is just … really, really amatonormative, tbh. I hate it. I’m trying to make a difference (I did organize Gen Jojo Week along with my friend Rachel last year, and hopefully will again this year), but there’s only so much I can do.

How can the aro-spec community best help you as a creative?

Aside from reblogging my art and promoting my fics? Talk about stuff. Talk about aro stuff in fandom. Seriously! I know it seems obvious that aro people would like aro headcanons and gen fics and all that, but we need to talk about them more. Nobody outside the community gives enough of a shit about us to have aro headcanons, so let’s get them popular. Talk about your favorite aro headcanons. Talk about your favorite gen fics. Talk about how such-and-such character is totally aro; talk about how excited you are to see aro characters in fics. My dream is for aro headcanons to become just as common and popular as any other type of headcanon.

Can you share with us something about your current project?

This is old news to most of the people who already know me, but my current big project that I’ve been working on for several years now is Between Life and Death, a drama/horror/supernatural JJBA fic.

(WARNING: PHANTOM BLOOD AND STARDUST CRUSADERS SPOILERS BELOW.)

The plot of the fic is that Dio wins at the end of Stardust Crusaders, and after realizing that he has no hobbies other than harassing the Joestars, he decides to bring Jonathan back by sticking his head (which… we’ll just assume Dio preserved for plot purposes) onto Jotaro’s body. Obviously, Jonathan is NOT happy with this arrangement, but it also turns out that Jotaro’s still alive, just not in control of his body. He can still use his stand, so he essentially uses Star Platinum as a sort of proxy for interacting with the environment around him, even though he only comes out when Jonathan’s alone since he doesn’t want Dio to know he’s alive.

Basically, it’s the story of a depressed vampire and a traumatized ghost. It’s a very introspective fic; most of the story consists of conflicts between Dio and Jonathan, and Jonathan and Jotaro struggling to come to terms with their new existences - Jonathan being unable to reconcile vampirism with his personal morals, and Jotaro having one hell of an identity crisis while also mourning the deaths of his friends and family. The plot is picking up, though, and there is an end goal in mind, as well as an eventual sequel!

As for where the story-in-progress is at right now … well, the next “stage” of the plot is hamon training for Kakyoin and Avdol, which will be fun. This chapter also includes several dream sequences, including an extended appearance by Mary Joestar (Jonathan’s mom), and a very serious and dark scene which I almost ruined by having dream!Will Zeppeli refer to Jonathan as his padawan. Yeah.

Have you any forthcoming works we should look forward to?

As mentioned, I’m working on chapter 9 of Between Life and Death! And working on and off on some stuff for the mutants AU. Most recently, on a whim I rewrote the lyrics to Handbeat Clocktower by MOTHY to be about Jonathan Joestar. Somehow this went far enough that I’m making an actual UTAU rendition of this “parody”, and hopefully it’ll be done sometime in the next few weeks. I’m really having fun with it and I hope people like it!

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modernsocialist · 6 years ago

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Multiculturalism as the Social Hegemony of Liberal Capitalism and How Capitalism Co-opted the Left

The Liberal Left is made up of a diverse range of people united by a simple desire to improve society and make the world a better place for us all to live. Though an easy target for the right-wing press, this is far better than being apathetic, resistant to change, or worse, hating those that are different. A fairly large portion of these people define themselves as being anti-capitalist or socialist. Yet while these people have good intentions, many are unfortunately blind to the trap that capitalism has ensnared them in. Marx understood, and was truly impressed by, the strength of capitalism including its ability to adapt to changes in society.

An example of this adaptability can be found in the period when ex-Soviet Bloc countries, such as Poland and the Czech Republic, started acceding to the European Union. British business interests saw an opportunity to introduce masses of cheap labour and lobbied the Blair government to allow early entry to the British labour market for their citizens. This was simply because business wanted a larger labour force to help depress wages and also because what for us were poorly-paid jobs, to East Europeans were seen as tickets to riches for their families back home. (One pertinent point - the stereotypical ‘Polish plumber’ was a good worker because he appreciated the relatively high wages. This shows that decent wages do pay for themselves through improved productivity.)

So, while individuals, or small groups of the like-minded, may be racist, liberal capitalism as a system is colour-blind. In the free market any route to profit is the right route. Upton Sinclair’s classic novel ‘The Jungle’ depicts a good example of this. The reader follows the story of a Lithuanian immigrant headed for the meat-packing hell of early 20th Century Chicago. Racism rears its ugly head many times throughout but capitalists need labour and there is a steady flow of immigrants to provide it – much of it to replace those who are killed or have had their health ruined by their work. The bosses don’t turn down the potential to extract profit from a person’s labour just because they are from the ‘wrong’ background; particularly not in the raw, unadulterated free-market liberal capitalism that held sway there. The similarities to today’s zero-hour, ‘self-employed’, gig labour market are also evident in the casual, unreliable nature of the work available.

This can now lead us to an understanding of the main reason why liberal capitalism hasn’t just adapted to the demands of I.D. politics and the multiculturalists but has woven them as a major panel into the tapestry of its cultural hegemony, alongside consumerism and its cousin, ‘aspiration’, the Tory codeword for individualist greed. Since the richest nations are those with least internal problems and a society at war with itself is not a stable platform for extracting profit, an ideology has had to be promoted to temper resentment aimed at immigrants. This is much like the American society that had been primed with the myth of the ‘melting pot’ - though the multicultural ideology has been replacing it due to its supposed even broader inclusiveness within consumer capitalism, but also because it sinks even deeper social roots. (The recent right-wing populist reaction to globalisation in the US that lead to Trump’s victory points to a need for new tactics and strategy on the left.)

Another point to keep in mind is that those who identify themselves as socialist or anti-capitalist and sign up to the doctrine of multiculturalism normally state that they do so because they believe in ‘tolerance’, even though it doesn’t actually mean to happily enjoy other experiences. Rather, to be tolerant is to accept the rights of others to live and think differently, even when you find some aspect or other of this to be distasteful - much like the famous dictum of Voltaire’s biographer Evelyn Beatrice Hall, that is often misattributed to Voltaire himself, about defending to the death another’s right to say something, even if one utterly disapproves of it.

Of course, oneself has the freedom to disagree openly about aspects of an immigrants’ culture in a free society but such criticism always carries the danger of seeming to carry the whiff, real or perceived, of racism or bigotry. This is where we have to tread extremely lightly and make sure any criticisms we do make are coolly and rationally argued, for progressive reasons, and do not provide any ammunition for racists and the far-right. While this is not the place for discussing forced marriages, parallel legal systems or genital mutilation, one outcome of multiculturalism in Britain is worth noting as a logical outcome of this ideology since it is not something that either Socialists or secularists in the past would have wanted to see happening. (Maybe it was easy to attack Roman Catholic or C of E schools but they now feel uncomfortable in criticising Muslim schools because they fear any accusation of racism or Islamophobia.) As I’ve always argued, multiculturalism is ultimately divisive and the growing number of faith schools is a glaring example of this. This multiculturalism-friendly policy, which is opposed in general by those on the left, is actually being promoted by the Tories, defenders of free-market liberal capitalism. The free-market wing of the Tories support this policy for reasons of social division, as I’ve explained in previous essays, while the conservative wing of the party like the idea of more religious schools teaching traditional moral values. (The two Tory tendencies may fit together well with this policy, yet it also hints at the internal contradictions of capitalism to be more fully revealed in the future, as the social hegemony that helped keep stability for profits creates even deeper divisions in the future that may be a lot harder to overcome.)

If what I posit is true and multiculturalism is a divisive ideology in the long run, those on the left should not support it and instead find another way to unite working people. For Socialists the answer is obvious. They should go out and promote the raising of class-consciousness. Identification along religious or ethnic lines offers little chance of help and much chance of hindrance in organising unified action towards socio-economic ends. Finally, I should note two different strands of considering multiculturalism among progressives that roughly follows the split of liberal left and socialist.

The first group proclaim their love of immigration and the alluring cultural supplements that come with it, but this is served with a dose of self-righteousness and an attitude to immigrants that can sometimes comes across as patronising. This is a group of people who, subconsciously or not, are diminishing the status of immigrants to mere actors who arrive to provide ‘colour’ and a ‘touch of the exotic’ to the lives of the proudly (smugly?) cosmopolitan natives. I do not tell a lie when I say that these have been given to me in all seriousness as among the primary reasons why multiculturalism is a good thing! (Surely I don’t want to deprive these people of access to the latest delicious ethnic cuisines, do I?) Much of this can be put down to a lack of understanding because the ideology of multiculturalism is not just simply another name for diversity or anti-racism. But this vain group has no interest in challenging the economic system and obviously includes people who would vote Tory, at least by the time they get into their thirties.

On the other hand, the instinct to help those who are too weak or otherwise unable to help themselves has always been part of what makes one a progressive. But a large number of anti-capitalists hold the belief that since some injustice has been checked by the spread of multicultural ideas, multiculturalist ideology itself can be used to attack the major problems of inequality in society. The road to the radical reorganisation of society, though, requires a revolutionary shake-up of the economic system, the root of nearly all systemic inequality, which multiculturalism cannot provide as it offers barely any economic analysis of difference of outcome beyond noting a developing lumpenproletarian ‘white working class’ or the difficulties of black youth in the inner cities. The one big problem that could be helped but not put to rest is the misogyny of many men; a fact that we are highly attentive to nowadays. While still an issue of power, it is not, in the main, economic power. This would require more progress in cultural and personal areas that others have far more expertise about so I leave it there, a basic explanation of the corrosive nature of misogyny surely unnecessary for the reader.

I have usually argued about why I see multiculturalism as divisive in its own way and also the problems that arise for radical grassroots organisation due to this. What I have tried to show here, though, is that multiculturalism is a cultural ideology picked up and evolved by Liberal Capitalism to keep economies stable and thus more profitable. The belief among those on the left that multiculturalism or ID politics in general can fully and truly reduce inequality is not just wrong-headed – it is actually obscuring the importance of revolutionary economic change and its role in providing true social justice. Of course, for capitalists, the multicultural hegemony behind this social system is working just as it should - for the benefit of the high economy and the tiny oligarchical elite it supports.

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theliberaltony · 7 years ago

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via Politics – FiveThirtyEight

Mary Ellen O’Toole calls the teenagers who murdered 13 people at Columbine High School in 1999 by their first names — Dylan and Eric. O’Toole did not personally know Dylan Klebold and Eric Harris, but she’s thought about them for decades. At the time of the Colorado shootings, O’Toole was a profiler for the FBI and had been tapped to write the bureau’s report on how to prevent mass shootings in schools. What began as a research project has become a life’s work — and a deep source of frustration.

O’Toole is part of a small group of academics, law-enforcement professionals and psychologists who published some of the first research on mass shootings in schools. She and other members of this group began paying attention to the phenomenon in the late 1990s. Two decades later, some of them say not much has changed. The risk factors they identified back then still apply. The recommendations they made are still valid. And, as we saw last month at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School, students are still dying. “On the news, people are saying we should be concerned about this and that,” O’Toole said, “and I thought, ‘We identified that 20 years ago. Did you not read this stuff 20 years ago?’ … It’s fatiguing. I just feel a sense of fatigue.”

It’s difficult to say definitively how many school shootings have happened in the years since Columbine — or in the years before it. It’s harder still to prove how many would-be shootings were averted, or how many others could have been if additional steps had been taken. But the people who have spent the last two decades trying to understand this phenomenon are still here, and still trying to sell politicians and the public on possible solutions that are complicated, expensive and tough to sum up in a sound bite.

Any research into school shootings is made more difficult by how uncommon such shootings are. In 2016, FiveThirtyEight wrote about the more than 33,000 people killed by guns in America every year. Of those deaths, roughly one-third — about 12,000 — are homicides, but hardly any are due to mass shootings.1 If you define mass shootings as as an event where a lone attacker indiscriminately kills four or more people, in a public place, unrelated gang activity or robbery, then mass shootings account for a tiny portion of all gun homicides — probably a fraction of a percent.

There have been many attempts to formally quantify school shootings, but, as with mass shootings, all use different definitions. Our chart is taken from a 2016 paper that defined a school shooting as a premeditated incident of gun violence that took place in an educational setting, killed or wounded at least three victims (not counting the perpetrator), was unrelated to gang activity and was not an act of domestic violence.2 This data suggests that school shootings, though still extremely rare, are more common today than they were 40 years ago.

But no matter how you define a school shooting, they’re still a subset of a subset — just as mass shootings account for a fraction of all gun homicides, school shootings account for a fraction of all mass shooting deaths. In 1995, when O’Toole began to study school shootings, they seemed like even more of an outlier than they are today. “I couldn’t even call it a phenomenon,” she said. “Prior to Columbine, there was no indication that it was going to become one of those crimes that just becomes part of the culture. It looked like it could have faded away.”

These uncommon but high-profile tragedies had also drawn the attention of Marisa Randazzo. In 1999, she was the chief psychologist for the Secret Service and became a part of a joint effort between the Secret Service and Department of Education to better understand school shooters and how to prevent attacks before they happened. Randazzo had previously worked on the Exceptional Case Study Project — a Secret Service project designed to better understand people who threaten the president and other public figures. Like school shootings, assassinations are extremely rare events that have a huge impact on society. That rarity makes them hard to study — and makes it hard to tell blowhards from real threats. But their impact makes them important to understand.

Randazzo found that the project’s findings echoed what she was learning about school shootings. For instance, the Secret Service had once focused its energy on threats made by people with a history of violent crime or who had a mental illness that caused them to act irrationally. But the Exceptional Case Study Project analysis showed that most people who actually carry out attacks didn’t meet either of those criteria. Instead, a better way to figure out who was a really a threat was to talk to friends, family and coworkers — most attackers had discussed their plans with other people.

Randazzo and O’Toole’s parallel reports came to remarkably similar conclusions.

First, these studies determined that there wasn’t much point in trying to profile school shooters. Yes, most were (and remain) male and white, but those categories were so broad that they’re essentially useless in identifying potential threats ahead of time, Randazzo said. What’s more, she said, more detailed profiles risked stigmatizing perfectly reasonable behaviors — like wearing wearing black and listening to loud music.

Instead, the reports focused on the behavior and mental state of the young people who chose to kill. While these teens were deeply troubled, that’s not quite the same thing as saying that those who commit school shootings are just irredeemably mentally ill. Nor does it mean those young people suddenly snapped, giving no warning. “School shooters typically do this out of a profound adolescent crisis,” said James Garbarino, a professor of psychology at Loyola University who specializes in teen violence and began studying school shooters in the late 1990s.

Randazzo described a pattern of young people who were deeply depressed, unable to cope with their lives, who saw no other way out of a bad situation. The stressors they faced wouldn’t necessarily be problems that an adult would see as especially traumatic, but these young people were unable to handle their emotions, sadness and anger, and they started acting in ways that were, essentially, suicidal.

Some of the best data on the mental state of school shooters has come from interviews with those shooters (and would-be shooters) who survived the attack. Randazzo described one such living school shooter,3 currently serving multiple life sentences, who told her that before the attack he spent weeks vacillating between suicide and homicide. Only after he tried and failed to kill himself did he settle on killing others in hopes that someone would kill him. Garbarino, who has interviewed dozens of people who went to prison for life as teenagers, both for school shootings and other violent crimes, heard many similar stories.

“The reason I emphasize this is that we know so much about how to help someone who is suicidal, and those same resources can be used very effectively with someone who is planning to engage in school violence,” Randazzo said. So how do we spot the ones who are planning an attack at a school? The studies she and O’Toole published years ago showed that, like people planning to attack the president, would-be school shooters don’t keep their plans to themselves. They tell friends or even teachers that they want to kill. They talk about their anger and their suicidality. And as more teens have attacked their schoolmates, that pattern has proved to hold true over time. It was true for Nikolas Cruz, the Parkland shooter. It was true for the at least four potential school shootings that were averted in the weeks after Parkland — all stopped because the would-be killers spoke or wrote about their plans and someone told law enforcement.

While all the experts I spoke with said that policies that keep guns out of the hands of teenagers are an important part of preventing mass shootings, they all also said it was crucial to set up systems that spot teens who are are struggling and may become dangerous.

But those systems seem to break down over time. Randazzo told me that her team had trained numerous school districts in school shooting prevention back in the early 2000s and, as of this year, many of those districts no longer had prevention systems in place. Thanks to staff turnover and budget reprioritization, that institutional knowledge simply withered away. And ironically, that happens precisely because school shootings are so rare. “It takes time and effort for a school to create a team and get training,” Randazzo said. “And, fortunately, threatening behavior doesn’t happen often enough” to spur schools to action.

Read more: Mass Shootings Are A Bad Way To Understand Gun Violence

#IFTTT #Politics – FiveThirtyEight #politics #538 #Maggie Koerth-Baker

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jinjikook · 7 years ago

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Even The Sun is Jealous (M)

🎃 word count: 2.5k

🎃 genre: smut ; idol-verse

🎃 pairing: reader/j-hope

🎃 warning(s)/kink(s): body worship, riding, lots of kissing + slight dom/sub undertones

🎃 summary: when your boyfriend is a little down and hard on himself due to some toxic fans, you find a way to show him just how much you really love him, as well as plenty others.

🎃 requested by: anon - “Can I request for a JHope/reader Body appreciation one shot?”

🎃 music: neighbors know my name - trey songz + who you are - jessie j

🎃 masterlist + kinktober 2017

gif credit

“I really wonder what it’d be like to be someone’s first choice…”

You walked out of the bedroom into the conjoined bathroom to find your boyfriend in front of the full body mirror tacked onto the wall, eyeing himself front and back, forwards and backwards.

“What’s the matter honey?” Hoseok doesn’t make eye contact with you, instead lifting his shirt a little to pinch at the barely there, hardly non-existent pudge that settles around his hip bone. He hums noncommittedly, as if he had an answer but didn’t know how to verbalize it.

You snuck up to his side and pressed a dry peck to his cheek, looking into the mirror to see if it gave you any clarity as to what he was on about.

“Just… I get it, Jeonggukie is handsome and Tae Tae is cute but—am I really so ugly to ARMY that they don’t want me, even on VLIVE?”

You looked at your boyfriend with the most scandalized expression you could possibly muster, disgusted that he could think so lowly of himself especially based on the very few horrible remarks from people that clearly couldn’t be real fans if they didn’t appreciate a group as a whole.

“Jung Hoseok, I can’t believe what I’m being forced to hear right now.” Your hands were at your hips but your boyfriend was still glued to his reflection, analyzing and criticizing every minute, human detail of his body. “What makes you think such blasphemy?”

Hoseok stayed silent, a sigh escaping past his nose instead of his mouth as it stayed shut in a firm line.

“I know I’m not as good looking and I certainly don’t have the brawn or brains as some of the others, but I’m not that unappealing? Right?”

“You’re not. Like, at all. You’re one of the most handsome men I’ve ever laid eyes on and—”

“You have to say that, you’re my girlfriend.”

“Don’t interrupt, I’m not finished.”

Hoseok tightened his mouth again, finally making eye contact with you through slightly shiny, dewy eyes.

“And you’re one of the most amazing people I’ve ever had the pleasure to meet. You’re smart and sweet and kind and wonderful and you care so, so, so much about others it’s amazing. The talent you have, in dance and rap—hell, even singing—is unprecedented.”

“But it’s always Jeonggukie and Jiminie they bring up when it comes to dance—”

“And that’s not fair to you, I know that. You don’t think I don’t wanna go on stage and shout at them that you’re an amazing dancer and performer and deserve so much more time to show that off? Believe me, if it wouldn’t get me kicked out and banned from several venues, I would’ve done it already.”

His lip quirked at the small joke, breath huffing out even though he tried to keep his face straight and attitude unaffected from the obvious tryst to lighten the mood.

“I want you to see what I see, Hobi. I see a man who’s so beautiful, inside and out. I see a man with a body that makes girls cry and men question themselves, a face that is so sharp and bright it makes the sun mad with jealousy. I see a person who, despite all the shortcomings that were so unfairly pushed their way, still smiles like the moon, always there for someone whenever they get lost and need guidance.”

Hoseok’s eyes grew wetter as you showed no end in your tangent, hands slightly trembling at his sides.

“There’s a man standing in front of me right now who isn’t afraid to show his emotions; when he’s afraid he screams, when he’s overwhelmed he cries and when he’s excited he jumps. He jumps as high as the sky and even further because he’s shown there’s no limits that he cannot exceed past. A man and a person I’ve fallen so head over heels in love with that I cannot fathom even for a second to hear and see you being so damn hard on yourself when there’s clearly nothing wrong. It kills me to see you like this baby, I just want you happy and knowing that you are important, just as much as the rest of them.”

And like that, the dam just breaks.

Hoseok cries and cries, into your shoulder and dampening the sweater, turning the stone to a deep, dark charcoal gray. His sobs wrack his body and shakes yours with it, as you soothe him and rub calming circles on his back.

You knew this was something he needed; even the happiest person just needs a good cry every once and a while. It’s therapeutic, really.

When his cries die down to sniffles and occasional whimpers, you pulled him away from the crook of your neck where he left tear-stained tracks and brought him in for a well-deserved kiss. His lips were wet from the tears and the kiss tasted salty but you couldn’t care less, needing to reassure Hoseok in your words—in your love for him.

Silently, you tug him back into the bedroom, bodies nearly plastered together and laid him down on the plush mattress you two shared on the rare occasion that he didn’t have to return to the dorm for a night. Hoseok was still sniveling, trying to wipe his cheeks dry and making his face look redder and splotchier with the passing of his hands.

“If you don’t want to believe me, I guess I’ll have to show you,” You hovered over your boyfriend and his eyes glistened as they watched you move on your own accord.

First you pressed a kiss on his forehead, down to one on each eyelid, past his slightly moist cheeks to taste even more salt before joining his own pout, deepening the kiss with a part of your lips and the intrusion of tongue. You stayed there for a minute, just enjoying the raw taste of Hoseok on your taste buds before slipping lower to continue your ministrations.

His neck would’ve been mottled in love bites and marks, had it not been for his idol status keeping you from such a pleasure. So instead you settled for wet kisses, a light suck down the column of his beautifully defined throat to distract him as your hands went for the hem of his black tee, to tug it up and over his head.

With his torso exposed, you were opened up to a much larger canvas to work with.

“Hoseok, listen to me.” You began, his eyes shut tight and fist tugging on the cotton blend sheet spread over the mattress. “I love your collarbones,” You kiss each one down the length of it before coming back up. “When you wear something that lets them peek out, it drives me nuts.”

His breath caught in his throat, hitched after a high gasp when your met the small divot in between his clavicles. You didn’t stop there, trailing further down to suckle along his pecs, slightly raised and delicately toned from years of intense dance and work out regimes. Each nipple pebbled when you’d kissed and licked it, Hoseok’s fingers tightening even harder in the bedsheets.

“I wish you’d see just how sexy your body is, this chest has been haunting my dreams since we saw the flash of golden skin during American Hustle Life.” Hoseok giggled at the memory, from before you two had gotten together but you clearly had been a fan then too. “Seriously, your hips there were my biggest wet dreams. But we’ll get to those later,” You winked even though Hoseok couldn’t see and moved to the side, rather than continuing the path straight down.

You gave a few more nips rather than kisses on the meatier flesh of Hoseok’s biceps, loving how the plush gave way to your teeth and you ran underneath to suck a bruise into his triceps, where you knew he could easily keep it hidden but still feel it ache every time he pressed his arm too close to his body.

He hissed as you sucked the mark on him, moving down to contrast the feeling with delicate pecks until you reached his hand, where you brought it up and kissed each and every knuckle.

“These hands that work so hard on music and touch people’s lives every day; where would I be without them?” You made a point to kiss his palm before going up and taking his index finger into your mouth, sucking long and hard and making Hoseok’s eyes jerk open just to catch sight of your lips plushly wrapped around his digit. You hummed and giggled with it inside your mouth, tongue tracing teasingly around the whorls and arches of his fingerprint until it slid out with an audible pop. He groaned and let his head fall back onto the bed with a bounce as he accepted his fate, when you switched sides to give the exact same treatment there as well, all the way down to his fingertips.

By the time you’d moved on and reached his navel, Hoseok was positively squirming.

“Baby, please just—fuck,”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t quite catch that?” Your grin stretched wide at his exclamation, probably brought on from how you sucked along the dips and divots of his toned and flat tummy. His abdominals were cleanly cut, always defined whenever his shirts clung to his figure—especially whenever he got wet.

Hoseok reached for the nearest pillow and screamed into it, frustration bubbling past his boiling point. No longer was he crying from being overwhelmed with emotion, instead it was with sheer need and want for something more than this slow drag of a game you were playing.

“C’mon love, I just want to prove how much I and the rest of us care about you. How handsome you really are.”

“Okay, okay! I believe you, just—no more, please,” You smirked at his reaction, wishing you could keep playing a little longer, to have had at least enough time to worship his thighs well enough.

“Fine, since I love you so much, I’ll grant you mercy.”

You stepped away from Hoseok’s slightly damp body, sore from everywhere your lips touched and he shivered from the cold as your body heat left him. With a small smile, you tore yourself away from the sight to get a condom from the nightstand, the sound of the drawer closing making Hoseok’s ears perk up in interest and familiarity.

“Honey, sit up by the headboard for me please.” Hoseok didn’t even think twice, immediately shuffling up to rest his back against the cool mahogany as his eyes hungrily watched you strip down for him hurriedly, yet still tantalizingly slow. His throat felt dry at the sight of you and he licked his parched lips when you approached, foil square in hand. “I think my beautiful boy deserves to be treated right, what do you think?”

Hoseok simply nodded, a wild hunger dominating his senses as he just wanted one thing and one thing only in that moment: to stop fucking around and get inside you already.

You drank in your boyfriend’s reactions, taking enough time to peel his underwear off his body and toss it away before giving him a few solid pumps, the head already glistening. He groaned once more, head knocking against the wooden board behind him before you finally succumbed to your own needs and rolled the condom on his length.

It only took a minute or two of your own fingers, stretching yourself open much to Hoseok’s chagrin, before you finally straddled the man, orange-red locks in your clutches as you bottomed out with him inside you.

Hoseok held his breath, feeling your walls tighten around him to incredible proportions and making his fingers leave light bruises on your hips from his grip. His control was waning, but you seemed to have the reigns in your hands as you began to whisper in his ear, along with a few brushes of your tongue along the shell of it.

“I love you, and I love the way you fuck me like no other.” And with that, you began to roll your hips in tight circles and figure eights, Hoseok’s toes curling at your heat engulfing his member so well.

His legs bent at the knee, hips languidly pumping up against each grind down as you two worked your own unique rhythm, starting off slow and growing to a hurried pace. Hoseok made his way across your chest with his lips, your grip in his hair keeping his pressed tight to you as he dropped his hands to your ass and brought you flush down against him to grind harder. His cock pressed up against somewhere sensitive inside you, your lip nearly bitten clean through from the grip your teeth had on it.

“Since you love me so much, let me hear it baby,” Hoseok nearly growled against you, hips audibly snapping and slapping against your ass, the sounds of sex palpable. The mattress creaked and groaned while the headboard knocked loudly against the wall, a soundtrack that the neighbors would no doubt complain about later.

Not that you had half a mind to care at the moment.

When he didn’t hear your moans like he wanted, Hoseok spanked the meat of your ass, making you yelp in surprise. The motion cause your lip to slip out from your grip and that’s when Hoseok held nothing back and brought you in tight in himself to fuck harder. His body jumped up from the mattress and you just held on, control completely switching over to Hoseok’s hands as he destroyed your core and marked up your breasts.

You panted hard, trying to find purchase in Hoseok’s shoulders when you felt the twine in your belly tighten, trying to breathe out a warning to your lover in hopes of him easing up and letting your orgasm wash over you gently but there was no such mercy. He simply brought it to a slow and hard grind, pressing up against that sweet spot and making you come hard. It was wet and dirty and Hoseok couldn’t hold back as he bucked a few last sloppy, hard thrusts before finally emptying out into the condom, holding you down onto him by the shoulders.

His moan was long and drawn out, another expression of his ability to show emotion so well. You whined into the crook of his neck as you throbbed hard, sore in the best of ways. He eased you off of him gently, rolling the two of you to lay on your sides, facing each other.

It was a comfortable silence, the two of panting hard and catching your breath. Hoseok’s skin glowed with a post-sex gleam, tan looking warmer than usual and his smile even more radiant.

“See,” You panted, “I love every little bit of you and ARMY does too, don’t worry.”

Hoseok laughed and you joined, before finally getting up and coaxing him in the shower with you.

Under the spray, you continued to praise and kiss your boyfriend’s worries away, silently fearing for a day like this to return and rear its ugly head again. You knew it was inevitable, with how cruel some people could be, but you hoped that each time Hoseok stayed stronger, grew a thicker skin.

At the very least, you hoped you could always be by his side to help him through it, show him that love is definitely something in his life.

#btswriters #bangtanwriters-net #kreativewritersnet #j-hope #bts #jung hoseok #hoseok #bangtan #bangtan sonyeondan #bangtan boys #jhope #j-hope imagines #j-hope scenarios #j-hope fic #bts imagines #bts scenarios #bts fic #j-hope smut #bts smut

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douchebagbrainwaves · 4 years ago

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WHY I'M SMARTER THAN FOUNDERS

We are still very suspect of this idea but will take a meeting as you suggest. Working for a small one, and actually did.1 Understanding growth is what starting a startup: growth makes the successful companies so valuable that all the time, I would have laughed at him. You can't make a mouse by scaling down an elephant.2 Fundamentally the same thing. The culmination of my career as a writer of press releases was one celebrating his graduation, illustrated with a drawing I did of him during a meeting. Other kids' opinions become their definition of right, not just because they so often don't, but because you shouldn't have a fixed amount of deal flow, by encouraging hackers who would have gotten jobs to start their own startups instead. I wanted to start a startup.

Nerds don't realize this.3 We're default dead, but we're not fucking.4 If the founders aren't sure what to focus on your least expensive plan.5 They don't consciously dress to be popular. As jobs become more specialized—more articulated—as they develop, and startups have lots of meetings but isn't progressing toward making you an offer, you automatically focus less on them. One founder said this should be your approach to all programming, not just startups, and in particular that the environment in big companies is toxic to programmers.6 Its length and slope determine how big the company will be a flop and you're wasting your time although they probably won't say this directly. And conditions in our niche are really quite different. When Steve and Alexis auctioned off their old laptops for charity, I bought them for the Y Combinator museum.7 The world seemed cruel and boring, and I'm not sure which was worse. If there are any laws regulating businesses, you can start as soon as the first one is ready to buy.

So the randomness of any one investor's behavior can really affect you. He said he has learned much more in his own image; they're just one species among many, descended not merely from apes, but from microorganisms. When the values of the elite in this country is a policy that would cost practically nothing. When your fundraising options run out, they usually run out in the same area, they had a different goal. I think it needs even more emphasizing.8 It is enormously fun to be at least $50 million. And popularity is not a new idea. One's first thought when looking at them all is to ask if there's a super-pattern, a pattern to the patterns. You should always talk to investors your m.

If you judge by the median rather than the average. And indeed, the growth in the first place. During Y Combinator we get an increasing number of companies that have already raised amounts in the hundreds of thousands. It took me surprisingly long to realize how distracting the Internet had become, because the VCs need them more than they originally intended.9 As you go into a startup, things seem great one moment and hopeless the next. You have to seem confident, and you need to be hackers to do what we do.10 That means closing this investor is the first priority, and you get what you deserve. We do a lot of implications and edge cases. Like any war, it's damaging even to the winners.

If you're designing a chair, that's what you're designing for, and there's no way around it. The reason is that good design requires that one person think of everything.11 That's the key. Why? When I have to say, not at all, because if I'd explained things well enough, nothing should have surprised them. Don't keep sucking on the straw if you're just getting air. Raising $20,000 from a first-time angel investor can be as much work as raising $2 million from a VC fund.

In the US things are more haphazard. Whatever the story is in the form of dividends.12 It's harder to judge startups than most other things, because great startup ideas tend to seem wrong. Tell them that valuation is not even the protagonists: we're just the latest model vehicle our genes have constructed to travel around in. If normal food is so bad for us, why is it so common? The most intriguing thing about this theory, if it's right, is that it has started to be driven mostly by people's identities. This essay is derived from a talk at the 2009 Startup School. Viaweb we were forced to operate like a consulting company you might be able to make himself one. Reward is always proportionate to risk, and very early stage startups and then ruthlessly culling them at the same rate.13 A country that wants startups will probably also have to reproduce whatever makes these clusters form. There are now a few VC firms outside the US, because they don't want random startups pestering them with business plans.14

We had 2 T1s 3 Mb/sec coming into our offices. That difference is why there's a separate word for startups, and why, if they have some other advantage like extraordinary growth numbers or exceptionally formidable founders. And yet, making what works for the user doesn't mean simply making what the user tells you to. But I also mean startups are different by nature, in the sense that all you have to be a police state, and although present rulers seem enlightened compared to the last, even enlightened despotism can probably only get you part way toward being a great economic power. This varies from field to field in the arts could tell you that you might want different mediums for the two situations. Great universities? What weaknesses could you exploit? My stock gradually rose during high school. Which almost always means hiring too many people. It's so important to launch fast is not so bad, the kids adopt an attitude of waiting for college. Some investors will let you email them a business plan, but you weren't held to it; you could work out all the details, and even make major changes, as you finished the painting.

Three months later they're transformed: they have so much more confidence that they seem as if they've grown several inches taller. You can measure how demoralizing it is by the number of new customers, but it wasn't designed for fun, and mostly it wasn't. So when someone commits, get the money you need, so you can say you've already raised some from well-known investors. And this started to happen more and more desirable things. Startups are marginal. You probably didn't have a precise amount in mind; you just want to make it a much more common one. This is especially true for a service that other companies can use, because it requires their developers to do work.15 How can they get off that trajectory? All the scares induced by seeing a new competitor pop up are forgotten weeks later.16

Notes

One source of difficulty here is defined from the end of World War II had become so common that their system can't be hacked, measure the difference between good and bad outcomes have origins in words about luck. This would add a further level of links.

Robert Morris points out that this filter runs on.

From the beginning even they don't want to create a web-based applications greatly to be able to buy stock, the last place in the ordinary variety that anyone wants.

Watt didn't invent the spreadsheet. I bailed because I realized that without the methodological implications. How much better, because to translate this program into C they literally had to for some reason, rather technical sense of getting rich from controlling monopolies, just that if you pack investor meetings as closely as you raise them. When investors ask you to raise more, and mostly in Perl, and power were concentrated in the last they ever need.

The unintended consequence is that the worm might have to do it is still what seemed to someone still implicitly operating on the aspect they see of piracy, which people used to wonder if they stopped causing so much on luck. You owe them such updates on your thesis. If you're the sort of community. There are some whose definition of property is driven mostly by hackers.

The person who wins. One professor friend says that 15-20% of the movie Dawn of the next downtick it will seem dumb in 100 years, it could be adjacent.

I assume we still do things that don't include the prices of new stock. Though in fact they don't know whether this happens it will become as big a cause as it might be a special name for these topics.

But there's a continuum here. Eric Horvitz. The air traffic control system works because planes would crash otherwise.

There is of course there is at fault, since they're an existing investor, than a huge loophole.

They say to the decline in families eating together was due to fixing old bugs, and the reaction of an investor who says he's interested in you, however, you can't dictate the problem is not just that if you have to go out running or sit home and watch TV, music, phone, and that injustice is what you care about may not have gotten where they all sit waiting for the linguist and presumably teacher Daphnis, but hardly any type I. I now have on the group's accumulated knowledge.

But the result is that you'll expend a lot of investors. How many times larger than the don't-be startup founders tend to be a hot startup. But the result is that there are few things worse than Japanese car companies, summer jobs are the only companies smart enough to do wrong and hard to make you feel that you're not even allowed to ask for more than that.

There were a variety called Red Delicious that had other meanings.

Nor do we push founders to have to rely on social ones. Ed. He couldn't even afford a monitor is that the usual way of doing that even this can give an inaccurate picture.

At some point, when they talk about the details.

You could feel like a little worm of its own.

But if you like doing. As Jeremy Siegel points out, First Round excluded their most successful founders still get rich, people who had made Lotus into the subject of wealth for society. According to the home team, I've become a genuine addict. The same goes for companies that an eminent designer is any better than Jessica.

Thanks to several anonymous CS professors, Robert Morris, Jessica Livingston, and Alex Lewin for reading a previous draft.

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