#what the fudge did you guys put in these movie

[silentgravesdontexist]

There's something abt Princess Mononoke that speaks to me. No, no, no...listen. I have watched this when I was a child. I already liked it.

Then I watched it again as teen— loved it.

Now, I am rewatching it for the nth time and I still love it. Adore it.

[madlori]

On Tommy Kinard

"It's not that I don't like Buck and Tommy, it's just happening so fast, he's underdeveloped!"

*clears throat*

Here is a recap of what we know about Tommy. And this is just off the top of my head, I didn't rewatch anything.

He was closeted at the 118 before and found the atmosphere repressive. He (probably) acted like a dick to fit in. When presented with the chance to make things better, he took it, and developed positive relationships with Hen, Chim and Bobby.

He was in the army and trained there as a pilot.

He knows Muay Thai and has a set up in his house.

He likes to work on cars and has a lift at his house (where TF does he live is my question - he has some nerve being agog at Buck's loft if he has a muay thai gym and a car lift)

He is down for violating departmental policy at the drop of a hat (has done so on at least two occasions) to help a friend and has no problems fucking with the fire chief.

He is a nerd. He likes pub trivia and has incorrect Star Wars opinions, and can keep up with Chim in the movie-quoting department.

His favorite movie is "Love, Actually" and he likes craft beer and monster trucks.

He came out when he transferred to Harbor and felt comfortable enough to stop lying about who he was.

He follows MMA and has friends in Vegas who like him well enough to hook him up to a frankly insane degree.

He'll risk his own life and engage in helicopter skulduggery to save people he doesn't know...I mean, apart from doing that for a living.

He'll take time out of his day to give a tour to the cute boy who called him up and offer to give that boy flying lessons (a significant time investment) which was probably maybe about more one on one time with said boy.

He yearns for the belonging and found family that the 118 became after his departure and probably befriended Eddie hoping to earn a plate at the cookout, aside from just clicking with him.

He likes Eddie and Chris a lot and they like him. Chimney also likes him.

He was attracted to Buck right away and was emotionally aware enough to pick up on Buck's jealous feelings over Eddie and his friendship, even if he was surprised that it was him Buck wanted to get to know.

He respects and values Buck and Eddie's friendship and wanted to make sure Buck knew that.

He's brave enough to shoot his shot by planting one on a dude.

He's a lil bitchy but also generous and ready to throw in with this insane guy who's inviting him to a family wedding after 0.5 dates.

He showed up to a bachelor party when he was on call because Buck asked him to, then showed up in turnouts after fighting a fire for like 12 hours yadda yadda we all know this part.

He has got it BAD for one Evan Buckley, who he only calls "Evan" which according to LFJR is a conscious decision by the writers, which fascinates me.

He was willing to take a chance with a man just discovering his sexuality BUT wasn't willing to put himself through that if the man in question wasn't ready for it. When Buck showed him that he was, he was all in.

He does NOT take his coffee like that.

Oh and

He's a beast.

This is VASTLY more information than we knew about ANY of Buck's previous girlfriends with the possible exception of Abby. Even Taylor did not get this much development over 20 episodes (things we knew about her: she was an ambitious and ethically flexible reporter, did not eat fudge, had a dad in jail, and sometimes jogged for exercise, she was capable of being nice and did love Buck, I believe). And as for it being fast? Sometimes it just be like that? A relationship doesn't have to have year(s) of buildup. Sometimes people do just meet, like each other, and start dating, in fact in the real world that's usually what happens. It's in TV Land that you have to have eighteen seasons of UST before pulling the trigger. Most of the time in reality people just vibe off each other and decide to go out and THEN they learn about each other.

And they've got a great start. You'd think they'd barely spoken by how a few naysayers are talking about it - the loft scene was like a solid five minutes of very open conversation, the Cringe Date seemed to have gone well and again, open and honest (if cringey) conversation before Cockblocker Eddie showed up, and the coffee meetup was again....open and honest conversation. They're not gonna show us long scenes of them exchanging firefighting stories and workout preferences (I mean, I'd watch that, but it's not what the show is about).

In conclusion, anyone saying he's poorly developed or the relationship is "out of nowhere" either is being willfully obtuse or has ridiculously unrealistic expectations for relationships and/or what constitutes character development.

As for whether they have chemistry, that's a matter of subjective opinion. Given that a TON of people watched that harbor tour scene (even when it was posted as a sneak peek) and started going "wait...what's going on here...are they flirting??" might be a clue. People were talking about Bi!Buck maybe happening with Tommy based solely off that clip of the harbor tour and what they were seeing between them. And imho that loft scene was crackling. But we all see things through the lenses of our biases, myself included.

Got that off my chest, whew.

[nyxindustries]

1995 | Tony Stark

Fandom: Marvel Cinematic Universe

Pairing: Young Tony Stark x Female Reader, x Reader. Tony Stark X Reader.

Warnings: 18+ MINORS DO INTERACT! Virgin Reader x Tony Stark, Very Soft Tony dom (if you squint) Virgin Tony Stark, Praise kink, slight vanilla sex

| Masterlist |

Cuddling with your long term boyfriend, Tony Stark.It's the summer of 1995, the year of flip phones and flannel skirts.

Your arms wrapped around Tony as you just finished watching a romantic comedy film.

"Tony…do you want to go get ice cream?" You asked quietly

"Date night?" He questioned and smiled

"Yeah, Date night, we haven’t don’t that in a while. ``You say and kiss him softly.

Tony and yourself are engaged, at just being 25 and 24 years old. You found each other at a diner, where you were just waitressing and you ended up spilling hot coffee on Tony, two years ago. Now you're here at Tony upper east side brownstone with the television going on.

Until you got up and pressed the button turning the Tv off. Tony walks up and gets your jacket off the coat rack.

You smiled, slipping it on as he helped you with your jacket that matched your black floral dress and leggings with combat boots. Tony simple black pants and over side shirt tucked in as he put on his jacket.

Leaving the house with him as you and Tony began walking, hand in hand. Talking softly during the evening as people pass the both of you trying to get into the ice cream parlor.

"So did you enjoy the film we watched?" Your boyfriend questioned and your thoughts made loops while you thought of the film.

"Oh! It was a lovely movie…but it made me realize a couple of things." You say quietly.

"Oh…like what?" Tony asks and you chuckled softly and you bopped his nose.

"Don’t worry about it, love" you say as you clasp both of Tony's hands, smiling up at him.

"What ice cream are you getting?" He asks

"Mint chocolate chip, with fudge on top and sprinkles!" You say a bit childlike,making Tony laugh at your randomness of ice cream choices and silliness.

"What about you?" You quizzed him gently.

"I’ll get a chocolate cone with rainbow sprinkles" he says and you nod as you approach the counter and order Tony’s and your ice cream. Before you took out your card Tony's hand came out of nowhere and handed his card to the cashier.

"Thank you but I had it covered," you spoke and Tony shook his head as then the employee gave your ice creams and you smiled softly taking yours and Tony immediately took a big bite out of it and your mouth hung open and then you just laughed.

“My ice cream,” you say and slightly frown.

“Sorry, here,” he says

Tony offered his ice cream and you took a bite of his ice cream and he smiled at you.

Walking out as you guys walked around eating ice cream together.

"Wanna go to dinner after this?" Tony asked and you stared at him and smiled.

"Yes…but I think we did this backward.." you say wondering off with your thoughts.

"Oh, We most definitely did…but it’s okay," Tony says and laughs as he finishes his ice cream and so did you.

"Where do you want to eat for dinner ?" Tony asked and you shrugged .

"Anywhere, your choice since it was my idea to get ice cream!" You say and Tony nodded as he grabbed your hands as he twirled you walking on the sideway.

"Italian " Tony says and you nod

“Oooooh Yummy! " you say and he smiled as he pulled you in and walked with you.

"Couple block up, the best restaurant there is for Italian food." Tony says as he walks with you.

Walking the next couple blocks and getting into the restaurant, getting seated quickly. Ordering food with Tony and talking casually about how you want to continue school and possibly becoming a nurse and Tony talking about how he wants to continue with his father business.

-

It was late evening now, Tony and yourself were walking home. Even though you lived with Tony,

You guys never actually took the big step, cuddles and things like that but nothing more even with being engaged. Watching that movie earlier, made you feel and realize that Tony is everything to you and you want to give him everything.

"T-Tony..Remember earlier… I said the movie made me realize a few things…"you say trailing off.

"Y-yeah… what about it?" He asks and you take a deep breath as Tony opens the door to the brownstone.

Walking in, taking off your jacket and looking at Tony.

"Well…you know…I just…uh.." Trailing off and turning red as he eyed you.

"You want to break up, call off the engagement?" He questioned worriedly.

"Oh god, no Tony…I want to take it further…you know… like…what…people…do when they're in love." You say frantically trailing as you turn bright red.

"Oh!….oh…"Tony exclaims in surprise

"Sorry, I didn’t mean… you know…I didn’t mean that…forget it, Tony.." you say and trailed off, ready to walk away.

Tony grabs your hand and you look at him as tears swelled your eyes.

"Hey, it’s okay…I understand…I just thought you wanted to wait until we’re married but it’s okay…I understand…" Tony says trailing.

"It’s just that…I’m a…a virgin…" Tony says trailing off and you nodded with a soft smile as he caressed your face gently.

"Me too, Tony, but I want you… and I want every part of you because I love you, Tony" you say whispering.

"I love you too, do you want to? Are you ready?" He asks and you nod.

"Yes, I’m ready Tony.." you say and he picked you up gently as you kissed him , he kissed back.

Carrying you to the shared bedroom the both of you share. He placed you down gently and you smiled as you kissed him and he kissed back, getting on-top of you.

Tony hands roaming your body as he lifts your dress and takes it off you gently, and you sighed, feeling exposed as you helped Tony get his shirt off.

Kissing you once again as you let Tony trail down with kisses causing you to giggle softly. Tony reached for your leggings as he tugged at them as he looked at them.

"Are you sure you want this? We can stop whenever you want too" Tony says, nodding in response as your breath hitches.

Feeling Tony fingers underneath your leggings and slipping them off, leaving you in your underwear and you started to turn red.

"H-hey…it’s okay…" he says, seeing your red face.

"Listen… have you touched yourself before?" He asks.

"Y-yeah I have…" you say and Tony nodded as he slipped your panties and bra off.

Tony moved up as went to kiss your lips, as you felt his fingers rub your clit.

You gasped softly as Tony began running faster.

A moan escaping your lips as you got surprised by the noise you just made, which made Tony smirk at you.

Feeling his fingers slipping down to your entrance, as you felt one finger slip in, moaning softly as gripped at Tony wrist as he looked up.

"Want me to stop? '' he asked, stopping his fingers, in response you shook your head.

"N-no… go faster please" you moaned quietly as his fingers thrusted faster and you moaned out. Tony felt all your wetness soak his fingers.

"I-I think you're ready." Tony says and you nod as you feel his finger slip out. You whine at the loss of pleasure.

"This is going to hurt a bit…just take a deep breath and let me know if you want to stop” he says

“Okay…it’s okay. You can now” you say taking a deep breathe

“I don’t really know what I’m doing.” Tony chuckled nervously

“It’s okay, we can finger it out together”

Tony slowly pushed in as you gasped, gripping him tightly as your breathing hitched a lot.

Looking him in the eyes as your hand ran through his hair as Tony moved further. Closing your eyes, as you felt pain and Tony comforted you gently.

“It’s okay… we’re both new to this..we can do this together” he says and you nod, pulling him closer as Tony sits there. Giving you time to adjust to him.

Taking a deep breath as you felt the slip into the background.

“Can you try and move, please” you say quietly and Tony nods as he slowly moves and you gasp more, as some of the pain comes back.

“D-do you want me to stop?” He questioned.

“N-no it’s okay…just take it slowly” you said and he nodded as he moved more and the pain slowly faded as you felt pleasure and a knot in your lower stomach.

Moaning softly as Tony still slowly thrusted slowly and at a steady pace.

“T-Tony…faster” you moaned out softly as he leaned down and kissed you softly.

He moved faster and you moaned louder with the shake of your head as you held onto Tony with a smile, as pleasure seemed to engulf you now.

“Tony…I like this…”you say and he smiled.

“Yeah me too” he says as he groans out.

“Go faster, please” you say and he picked the pace a bit , you moaned as he held onto your wrist.

The knot in your stomach become bigger and looser. “T-Tony…I think…I think-“ you say and he’s nods as he began thrusting faster. You held onto him, kissing him passionately.

Your hands running through his hair and his hands roaming your body and massaging your breasts.

“T-Tony… Tony I Think…I’m gonna cum.” You say and he nods

“Yeah me too” he says as he went faster the knot unravelled quickly, a foreign but welcoming feeling overcame as you gripped Tony.

Legs shaking as you came heavily with heavy breathing and loud moaning as Tony pulled out and came on your stomach quickly.

Warm liquid on your stomach as Tony smirked, grabbing a towel quickly and wiping your stomach off softly and you looked up at him.

“I love you Tony” you say quietly and he laid next to you and smiled.

“I love you too Y/n…I love you so much. Why I want to marry you..” he said and giggled softly as you yawned.

Whispering softly as you kissed Tony

“T-thank you for being understanding”

“Of course…I would never want to hurt you” he whispers, kissing your forehead and Tony smiles as he pulls you in close and you fell right to sleep listening to his heartbeat.

Waking up the next morning, not feeling Tony next to you and sitting up as you felt sore. Tony coming in the room, he smiled softly at you.

Sitting on your side of the bed and you looked at him.

“Morning, My love” sleeping still overcoming your voice

“Good morning my Darling, how do you feel?” Tony asks

“Uh…I’m…I’m sore” you say with a soft blush on your face.

“It’s okay, that’s normal…and you were so good last night” he said, praising you and smiling softly.

“I want to go take a shower but I might need help.” You shyly and Tony laughed softly.

“I can do that” he says and you stuck your hands out, Tony grabbed them as he lifted you up off the bed, carrying you to the bathroom.

Giggling softly as he held you, walking to the bathroom as he placed you down on the toilet and started the bath.

“Thank you Tony” you say and he smiled.

“Anything for you” he responded as the tub filled up and he made the tub at a warm comfortable temperature.

Getting up slowly as you stood with Tony helped you with getting into the tub.

Sitting down as Tony grabbed soap as you splashed water against yourself and Tony washed you with soap and you smiled softly as he was gently washing you and your hair.

“Breakfast is all done and I’ll bring it to you in bed while you rest and we can spend the whole day in bed” Tony says and chuckled in agreement.

“Okay…. That sounds wonderful” you say as Tony helped out of the tub , wrapping you in a towel. The soreness slowly went away but not all the way, still tingling.

“Go get dressed and I’ll go get breakfast for you” he says and you go to your closet and get dressed in comfortable home wear.

Laying in bed as you pulled a book

‘ Lady Chatterley's Lover‘. As you waited for Tony to come, which he did moments later after you read a few pages.

Sitting up and placing the book down as Tony smiled, placing the tray on your lap and Tony sat down next to you.

“Hmm…’ Lady Chatterley's Lover’ sounds interesting” Tony says, you nod, drinking some orange juice and digging into the chocolate chip pancakes.

“It’s super interesting, I love it so far”

Tony opened the book as you finished your food and he looked up to you as he grabbed the tray and placed it on the nightstand.

Tony pulled you in, as he placed his head on your lap gently, turning the pages from the beginning.

“ “Ours is essentially a tragic age, so we refuse to take it tragically. The cataclysm has happened, we are among the ruins, we start to build up new little habitats, to have new little hopes. It is rather hard work: there is now no smooth road into the future: but we go round, or scramble over the obstacles. We've got to live, no matter how many skies have fallen.” “

Tony reading out loud softly to you. You leaned back into the bed and smiled softly as you listened to Tony.

Wonderful…wonderful this is…being in love.

[bisluthq]

I saw people saying they remembered articles from February 2020 about Jason and Olivia separating but living together because of covid and the children, which disappeared around January. To me, the timeline doesn't make sense. Why was Jason perfectly happy with Olivia saying they split in February 2020 in the first article in November 2020 if he already knew about Harry? Also, Harry’s team putting an article out saying he wasn't to blame for this affair, and he was told they weren't together less than 12 hours later was funny.

Look, essentially you have three separate teams (Olivia’s, Jason’s and Harry’s) all doing separate things + the DWD promo team/the studio’s doing its own thing. Then you have the three of them also all doing their own separate things. I don’t think we’ll ever know exactly what happened because obviously they all have reasons to lie lol and did and will. Jason would obviously not want to have been publicly cucked - no man, let alone a Gen Xer man who’s very much a dude - would want that out there. It’s not imo that sympathetic to have had your BM fuck Harry Styles while living with you, it’s kind of deeply embarrassing. So I can see him also being invested in rewriting the timeline to look like he was less of a cuckold. Olivia obviously lies (we know this) so she likely was lying to both men. Harry wouldn’t want to be seen as splitting up a family tbh so whatever he knew or didn’t know like he also would’ve been invested in making the timeline like… more palatable lol so Jason and Olivia split up but were amicable co-parents and then he and Olivia started dating like that’s obviously a better version to put out than “Olivia cheated”? Especially since they still had the movie to put out so like 💀💀💀

idk man people who aren’t even famous lie and fudge timelines. My partner’s ex told people she met her AP the night he (my bf/her ex/her then husband) kicked her out and that they met on accident. She said she got kicked out after a big blowout fight, it was the middle of the night (this part is true) and she went to a friend’s house (unclear if this is true) because she was upset (probably true) etc and this new guy coincidentally happened to be staying there and that’s when they met. But like that’s not true lol. She got kicked out because her then husband saw messages on her phone from this other guy after she came home late and drunk after a meet up with this guy. Odds are she actually went to that guy’s house tbh and she def knew him - biblically - at that stage. But she tried to lie about it lol because saying “I got caught cheating and my husband told me to GTFO” isn’t a very sympathetic story. She also apparently then changed that story a bit when probed and like said my partner was distant and cold and shit and basically emotionally abusive which drove her to cheat/look for other guys lol. Again, more of a sympathetic story than “she cheated and got caught”. She also well likely believes some version of that second story idk she probably thinks if my bf/her ex was different then she wouldn’t have cheated. But also she stayed with the AP until he died in COVID because he was an anti vaxxer and anti masker and stuff but also recent tea I obtained through mutual friends because I’m xoxo gossip girl tbh heavily suggests that she cheated on that new/now dead guy too so maybe she should be asking herself why she keeps cheating lol idk.

Idk that lady’s thought processes like she’s just super fucking crazy imo and kinda a bad person. Not because she’s my bf’s ex because especially when I’ve been pissed at him I’ve investigated this and y’all know how much I like doing detective work and I really am a girls’ girl (pussies included and like he is not wrong in that she’s attractive so my drunk ass one time was like “how funny would it be if her and I got together” and then I truly FBI’d) and I’ve actively wanted to know like what he lied about (because everybody lies) or where the piping hot tea is being poured (I want to be there) but what I keep coming up with… is she is a crazy ass cunt lol who lies and cheats and has done so since she was a teenager (because a friend of hers from school is still mutuals with both her and my bf and I quizzed her - subtly - and like… bruh this lady is insane lol which actually at the time was an L for me because it was during our break and I was trying to prove he is always the problem).

my point is people involved in cheating generally speaking lie so idk why you’d expect to figure out exactly who knew what and when about complete strangers. I wouldn’t trust like friends’ versions of their cheating accounts 100% let alone the cheating accounts of total strangers. I assume Jason, Olivia and Harry all lied (to each other and to their teams and their teams lied too because it was a bad vibe situation???)

I’m not sure who the crazy ass cunt is in their situation. All or none idk. Could go either way.

[moviemunchies]

Many years ago, someone was kicking around a script for a movie called ‘Scorn’ about a retired assassin getting pulled back into the life of a killer. Eventually, someone filmed it under a different title, starring Keanu Reeves and directed by a stuntman, and the result was John Wick. 

And no one wanted to buy this movie.

Lionsgate finally did, hoping that maybe, just maybe, this movie would be moderately successful.

And then this movie changed action film history.

(Also I had the great fun recently of sitting next to someone who was going into this movie pretty much blind.)

A simple story! A man is mourning the recent death of his wife. His wife left him a puppy to take care of to help him grieve and move on. But then after being firm but polite with some Russian gangster’s son, Russian mob douchebags break into his house, steal his car, and kill his dog. Except, it turns out that the guy who they screwed with isn’t just anyone, he’s John Wick, a former assassin for the Russian mob, known for completing impossible tasks, earning the nickname “Baba Yaga,”--not the Boogeyman, the one you call to kill the Boogeyman. Now John returns to the criminal underworld of NYC to find this loser who killed his dog, and absolutely destroy him.

So, as I said, I watched this with my brother, who did not know what this movie was actually about other than that it was an action movie. I’ve told him in previous conversations that the dog dies, but that evening I don’t know if he remembered that when we actually put in the movie, and I was very concerned that he would hate me when the dog died. Especially when he first saw that puppy and expressed excitement at how cute she was.

Luckily, my brother did not disown me and he seemed to enjoy the movie.

I have trouble reviewing this movie because so many of my thoughts about it are about how it fits with the other movies. It’s weird, for instance, that Marcus doesn’t come up in future films, nor does Addy in the Continental. And Perkins is a freaking idiot in hindsight, because the Continental is an international organization, and there’s no possible way to get out of the situation alive.

Of course, these aren’t issues if you only take the first movie by itself. And so I can’t judge the film on those issues. You should judge a film on its own terms.

Thankfully, this movie is fantastic.

Do you remember how standard action movies shot their action scenes before this movie? Do you remember Shaky Cam? That horrible thing where directors would make up for crappy choreography by having the camera shake and not show you exactly what the fudge is going on? It was such a pain to deal with. Sure, it made sense in the Bourne movies, because it’s supposed to be frantic and the title character’s brain is all scrambled. That’s not the case in a lot of action movies in the 2000’s and early 2010’s–in those instances, it was copying a deliberate stylistic choice because they thought it was the way it was supposed to be done, resulting in fight scenes that looked like crap. 

And then John Wick, which again, is directed by an actual stuntman, made a point to have wide shots and discernible actions in its major fight scenes, so that you could actually see what’s happening. And it’s wonderful! The point of the movie is watching John Wick take down a bunch of douchebag mobsters, and it’s going to make sure you see it, darn it!

What’s really fascinating about this movie is the worldbuilding. Not only is there a mob underworld of New York City, but it apparently runs by its own rules and has its own currency. The later movies reveal that this isn’t exclusive to NYC, but here we have no idea, and it feels mysterious by how much is implied without being said. They use gold coins to pay for everything, there’s a guy you pay to clean up the bodies, and apparently everyone in authority knows who John Wick is–including the local police officer. The Continental is such a cool idea I would love to see a movie or television series about it by itself.

Not an origin story for Winston, like what we actually got in the Peacock series (which I haven’t seen so I don’t know much about it). I mean, I would like to see a story about the everyday life of people working at these hotels.

[Also it’s a bummer we don’t see Addy again, Bridget Regan absolutely deserved to come back in one of these movies.]

The film raises the interesting question of, how do we create a likable assassin character? Most movies and video games do that by making it a revenge story, and to be fair, John Wick IS a revenge story. But it also shows us John being really nice to the people around him? One of the things that’s interesting and goes along with the worldbuilding is we see John interact with the people in the Continental and… he’s unfailingly polite and nice to them. They all love him, except the people who are trying to kill him. Like, yeah, he’s an assassin, but aside from the people who want him dead, he’s actually a really nice guy.

[sigh] If only they hadn’t killed his dog…

Okay, so the premise is kind of dumb, but that doesn’t change that it’s a really good movie. A surprisingly good movie, actually. I guess this is what you get when you tell a fairly basic story in a really interesting way. It’s a revenge story, but one that sounds unique and fun and interesting, with a cool protagonist and an intriguing world. What else can you ask for in an action movie?

[By the way, if you enjoy this movie, or the rest of the series, I highly recommend you look up the book They Shouldn’t Have Killed His Dog, which is about this series, how it got made, and the effects it has had on the action film genre.]

[ketchup112]

Hello, I like a certain game called Candyland and I kind of wanted to share.My lower ideas and head cannons and characters signs for the game.This is only for characters. You guys can skip this if you want, I just want to share it.

It counts where they live, like what region. Like if they live somewhere cold and ice creamy, they could be ice cream. Or they have relations with heart candy. And their diet? And genes, because you can have a candy person with peppermint and cherry. And you can have a ice cream person with hot fudge. The candy people are unwedable. They're fleshy, humanoid creatures. They just have characteristics and adaption to digest any candy and kind of look like it. Believe they're poisonous, if he even tried to eat them.

Yes, I had to make that clear. Do not eat the candy, people. Just don't!

Enough with Mr. Peppermint. My favorite character.

Sticking with the peppermint theme and what I got from his later old designs that I tried to mix inside this. Read the sign of him in my art style.

It is the coloring actually. The first thing you see is. Being pure white. And then the red and a little bit of pink of his old design of being a pink. Candy cane. In his old designs he had yellow gloves and I intertwined with that on his hands. Instead of this white there is red, and yes, pink is a red. I'm counting that. There will be a little bit of yellow. So, it won't be just dominated with those colors.

For his face he has naturally read cheeks. His eyes are pink, with the iris itself being like candy cane. His hair is red with pink highlights. He is fleshy, so he's like. A fleshy candy monsters. He smells just like peppermint. By the cold, pretty well. Because he lives in the Peppermint Forest, and Peppermint has been known to be. Chilling when you put it in your mouth. Like a twig, but he knows how to use a peppermint axe pretty well. Because he is a Lumberjack. Counting that he in the movies and maybe down the line when you're trying to say Candyland, he comes with you. He does a teaching role of small children and personal guardian or babysitter for the royal family. That is just it for right now, because once I get started with the relations.

He is adapted to survive in cold environments like ice cream and snow cones. But he is born as hard candy. Person. So he lives in the Peppermint Forest with maybe a handful of other hard candy people.

The Lord Licorice.

Newer and older designs went into this.I hope you guys like what I did with him.

Colors are dominated as black and red. He has a little bit of purple and gold. He also has a little bit of brown on his cane for chocolate. Shadow the Hedgehog with some Purple and Gold. And Brown. hehe.

His face is naturally red like the rest of his body. He has facial scars. All the way up to his eye and eyebrow. And all the way down to his lips. His lips have two scars. His hair has. Red coloring with black highlights. He is a. Fleshy candy monster. As a licorice. Person he can stretch in. Become flexible. He smells just like licorice and a little bit of dark chocolate. He lives alone with snakes and bats, so I guess he is the only. The homes are an island in the middle of a Magoon. Their home is full of licorice and bio of dark chocolate. He lives on his own, so he does not have mediate family, but I do hit Ken and him to be cousins to the King of Candy.

They're sharing outfits because they're pretty much the same thing, but different.There are both based off of their old carnations of.Therefore, emer artwork until now.They both have stripes.In their outfits.Now for the difference. That peppermint has fur to keep them warm. And Licorice has more as a family broch around his neck.

Well, that's it. If you guys have, you know, better writing skills than me, please talk to me because I don't mind sharing my head cannons or ideas with someone. I do need a little help.

[youmissedone]

🔴 Red - Do you have a dream AU you haven’t written in yet?

{out of smokes} Like I said over on Matt/Nemmy's blog, probably not, heh. I've been writing Carlos for a number of years, so I've had a lot of time and some really amazing writing partners who have gone through with me and their muses almost every possible AU I could think of for Carlos. Before the movies, during each of the movies, the real Carlos surviving, various clones being discovered, etc. I've done it all, heh. Well... almost.

I guess the two things I've never written with Carlos yet are 1) the real Carlos surviving all the way through to the release of the airborne anti-virus, and 2) what's the deal with Todd, haha? I'm not sure those are my dream AUs, but as far as things I haven't written with him yet, that's all I can think of.

1.) I've had the real Carlos survive his explosive death in Extinction before and taken him past that movie a little bit, and I've written clones during the Retribution era and beyond. I think a Carlos clone may have been with Alice when she released the antivirus, but I'm not sure. I'm currently writing a Carlos clone with Alice after she released the antivirus and she found him down in the Hive. But the real Carlos? He's never had that moment of seeing the apocalypse come to an end, and I kindof want that for him somehow. I'm just not sure... how or why the real Carlos would have survived up until that point. It just doesn't make a lot of sense, and I know I've done some crazy fudging on my RE blogs for various reasons, but this one is a noggin-scratcher for me as far as having it make enough sense to the point where I can write it.

2.) Todd is the Carlos clone in the beginning of Retribution and Becky's "father." I mean, they're all clones and Becky was just made with Alice and Carlos' DNA, but still, you know what I mean. But yeah, he's a simulation clone meant to be an average work-a-day guy with a family in the "Suburbia" testing floor of Umbrella Prime. But he has Carlos' DNA, right? And isn't the whole reason why some of their employees and Alice were placed into these simulations because some of these people have off the charts abilities, survival instincts/skills, and/or physical prowess that can be tracked back to their genetic code? Simply put, they've got great genes, heh, and Umbrella wanted to test what those genes were innately capable of, regardless of starting origin. But Todd, despite having Carlos' amazing genes, just didn't have the same skills or survival abilities, and I've always wondered why.

Was Todd made to be inferior to Carlos for some reason? Was he programmed a certain way so as not to unlock his full potential? Was/is there a way to "awaken" Todd to remember who he really is based off of? Is that even possible, would he even know Carlos or have any other sense of self beyond that testing floor? Because Alice's clone did seem to tap into those survival skills and abilities that Project Alice had, so I've always wondered why Todd wasn't able to do the same.

Unless... him doing the whole, "get Becky back!" thing as he fought off the undead was him being like Carlos. Think about it, the real Carlos sacrificed himself to save others, and isn't that what Todd did? Maybe that is Carlos' core personality and his strength, his altruism. I just blew my mind a little haha because I actually never thought of it that way before, but that actually makes a lot of sense. And if that's true, then that means Todd may have a lot of Carlos' same heart and core personality, unlike the commando clone of him we see later in the movie.

Anyhoo, I'm really not sure what I would do with Todd, exactly, but it's one of the avenues of writing Carlos that I've yet to explore, for sure.

[fasterthanmydemons]

[ Speedster of the Galaxy ]

When Pietro sat down with them, the Guardians started to act the way they always did. Gamora sat next to Quill and he pressed a kiss to her cheek. The Guardians rarely let other members of their own team eat alone; bonds in space were few and far between, so sticking together was their way of staying strong. Besides, it was always nice to have a sense of connection and community. As Pietro explained how he liked to use his speed to get people out of harm’s way, Drax nodded approvingly. Groot, on the other hand, just frowned while nibbling on a toast.

“If I had super speed,” Groot said, “I would just use it to steal candy!”

“I don’t know who taught you that stealin’ is okay, kid,” Rocket added, pouring star-shaped cereal into a bowl before adding alcohol. “You guys want some? I stole like thirty-five boxes from Earth.”

“Dude, Rocket, you’re supposed to pour milk,” Quill said. “Not booze!”

A conversation about how they had been unable to fuel the Benatar on Earth followed. Rocket passed the cereal box to Mantis, who poured some for herself, before smiling and giving the box to Pietro. Quill said he was hoping they could fuel the ship on that planet while Gamora mentioned they should come up with an emergency plan to deal with Flerkens, which made Groot laugh uncontrollably when he saw Quill shudder at the reminder. There were no more incidents as they had breakfast, and afterwards they were left with an amount of leisure time that would probably be limited; Pietro was free to explore the ship, the planet, and look for resources for his turtle.

(Me ignoring this verse’s cosmic elephant in the room which is the language - in the GotG movies they do use a translator implant, however in IW and EG the characters from Earth don’t use those and they can still understand alien characters. Pietro, like Wanda, hates medical procedures so I have no idea how they’re gonna give him one.)

__________

{ Oh really? Hmm, I didn’t know that. Yeeeeah, that might be a problem for Pietro. He’s not as triggered by medical things as Wanda is in a panicking, trauma response sense, but he does really hate medical things and he’s not easily convinced to even go for regular checkups, let alone have implants put in. I mean, we could just fudge and say he did have it done? But then it wouldn’t be that surprising that he can understand Groot. But it’s much too mary sue to be like oh he just understands everyone heh. Him understanding Groot was some nice color, but I don’t wanna say he just always understands everyone. So hmm... I guess... we’re just... yeah, ignoring stuff? For now? *jazz hands* XD }

Although Pietro didn’t necessarily feel totally a part of this team yet, he did like sitting with them and listening to their banter. They all seemed so comfortable with each other, like a family. Well, they were family, he could clearly see. Family was not only blood. Sometimes it wasn’t even blood, if blood did you wrong somehow. But family was a big thing in Pietro’s culture, and found family was as valid and important as blood. By observing the Guardians and how they interacted with each other, it was clear that they were definitely a family, held together by trust, respect, and yes, a healthy amount of humor and sarcasm. Those were all the best elements of a family, in Pietro’s eyes.

He couldn’t resist getting involved in the conversation, grinning at Groot’s comment. “I have used it to steal candy,” he admitted with a chuckle. “Is very effective.” Rocket’s comment about stealing not being okay earned a little shrug from Pietro. “Sometimes is okay. Well... not okay, but necessary. When my sister and I were on the streets starving after our parents died, what was I supposed to do, let her cry and be hungry? Hell no, I got my ass out there and stole food for us. Sometimes life forces your hand, yeah?” He turned to Groot again. “The key... is knowing when is necessary to do, and when you are just being a little shit and should probably stop.”

But when Rocket then took out stolen alcohol and proceeded to pour it into his cereal, Pietro busted out laughing, his voice slightly high pitched with humor when he finally spoke. “What the hell, man?! You’re such a hypocrite!” he said, but not in a nasty or even accusing way. He thought it was hilarious that Rocket would, in one breath, both condemn stealing to Groot, and in the next, admit to stealing a bunch of alcohol from Earth. “It was necessary stealing, right?” Pietro then said in the same playful tone. “See? There is time and place for everything,” he said shrugging and going back to his food. When Quill commented that milk, not booze, should go in cereal, Pietro eyed Rocket’s bowl. “I mean... is it any good?” he asked, really wanting to know. “Maybe he is on to something...”

Pietro had already cleared his plate and was still hungry, but he didn’t want to be greedy. So he just sat with his empty plate. He was quiet for the rest of breakfast, just listening to the conversation. Afterward, he said he was going out to look for food and other supplies for Mr. Dibbles, which was most certainly a priority of his. The turtle depended on him, after all.

[survey--s]

651.

When was the last time you had a Poptart? About a month ago. It was a chocolate fudge one, I believe.

Do you like hot chocolate? I hate the instant stuff, but I do like proper Italian hot chocolate that's so thick you can stand your spoon up in it - it's basically melted chocolate with cream/milk added. I had an incredible one in Italy once and insisted we went back to the same cafe everyday of our visit haha.

Where do you buy gasoline? The petrol station at the end of the road.

Who made you laugh the hardest today? I haven't really spoken to anyone except Mike but I wouldn't say he's made me laugh. It was maybe the cats lol.

Who was the last person to promise you something, and what was it? Mike promised he'd ring his dad once he went upstairs, and he did.

Would you ever jump into a fire to save your bestfriend? Nobody knows how they'd act in that situation - you generally go into fight/flight mode and react on instinct, which is why I don't think it's fair to judge people based on how they act in an emergency.

Do you have a callus from writing too much? Not now, but I did when I was in school/university.

What was the last thing you failed at? I don't know.

Who is someone you’ve made a bad first impression on? Nobody in particular comes to mind right now.

What’s the worst thing you’ve ever done? I don't think I've ever done anything too horrendous, honestly. Overall I like to think I'm a pretty decent person.

Can you use chopsticks correctly? Yes, but I'm slow.

What was the last movie you watched on TV? Moulin Rouge but it was just on as background noise.

Who is your best guy friend? Mike.

Do you think walruses are cute? No.

What is the correct plural form of platypus? Platypuses.

When was the last time you used a glue stick? About twenty years ago.

What is your favorite form of transportation? Car. It's just the most convenient around here. Public transport is expensive and takes at least twice as long.

Who was the last person to sign off without messaging back to you? Suzanne but it's not exactly urgent. Do you read cereal boxes while you’re eating? Ha, I did back in the day before mobile phones. Or I read at the table.

What’s the last thing you accidentally (or purposely) burnt? Toast. A bit of the crust got caught in the toaster.

Do you know anyone named Trey? No. I don't think I've heard of anyone in the UK with that name.

What was the name of your last or current math teacher? Richard Hobley.

Did you know that there is a Twilight-sponsored Blood Drive named, “Carlisle Would Approve”? Donate blood for Edward? :) Ew.

Do you know anyone with a lip piercing? Not anymore, no. Everyone I know who had facial piercings had them removed.

What did the last tattoo you saw, look like? No idea, Mike is just covered in them.

Do you own any hair ribbons? No.

When was the last time you curled your hair with a curling iron? Never, my hair is naturally curly.

Do your fingertips hurt when you type for a long time? No.

Do you know anyone with a green bookbag? Mike has a green bag. Do you like colorful skinny jeans? I have some purple ones which I like, but generally no.

What was the last reason you were disappointed at someone? I got a cancellation on Tuesday but I'm sure she only cancelled as I messaged her to check something, which is a bit annoying.

Do you like “Juicy Couture”? No.

Where did you buy your favorite pair of jeans from? George.

When was the last time you wore a white shirt? No idea, I pretty much never wear white.

Have you ever given birth? No.

Doesn’t it just sound painful? It sounds horrendous. So does pregnancy. I have no idea why anyone would put themselves through either, lol.

Did you know that the equivalence of a woman giving birth, is a man peeing out a golf ball? 0_o Yep. Which begs the question - WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT.

Do you enjoy making out? Not really.

What color are your nails painted? They aren’t.

What’s your favorite food to put ketchup on? I don't put ketchup ON anything except burgers. I prefer it on the side so I can dip and my hands don't get covered in sauce.

[cursedchildofchaos]

💬💬💬💬💬💬💬💬💬💬💬💬💬💬💬💬💬💬💬

19??? Anon, you little shit! Okay, fine lol. Not giving context either besides that some of these are from fanfics and some original stuff

1. 

COACH

Schmidt just went full Winston and got

pet-ernal.

2. 

ALISON 

Nothing you say is going to change my mind, Dr. Felix. 

CHASE 

(through gritted teeth) 

Oh, it's last names now? Fine, but I'm not helping, Dr. Roberts. Use the damn machine yourself!

3. 

Talk or I'll bite you! I'll bite your whole family! I'll even bite your grandma!

4. 

And that's why you shouldn't trust strangers that offer you candy, kids. Never know when one might turn out to be a vengeful witch.

5. 

It's called a chemical reaction, you fudging sucker!

6. 

BEA

So, what brings you to Hell?

DAVE

Oh, my ex told me she would see me here.

7. 

If our dumbass friend is doing something dumbass, we are doing that dumbass thing, too, because we are dumbasses.

8.

A BANK OFFICIAL, standing in front of Dedire, pulls his collar as he eyes the porcelain dolls about the room. They seem like each one is staring into his soul.

9.

There’s a cat waiting to pounce when we stop dancing. You see, I’m allergic to cats, or cads, whatever you call ’em.

10.

Snape thought briefly that he might be dead and this was his own personal Hell even though he sort of enjoyed seeing Petunia cry. The situation was all too laughable and miserable at the same time...Maybe the Catholics were right about Purgatory being real?

11.

Haru: Tohru, tell your bf to accept this secret passionate love for Yuki and join the new Yuki Fan Club.

Kyo: I said replace me with her, dammit! Not add her and not get rid of me!

Tohru: Kyo, please, honey, just accept your secret passionate love for Yuki. Also, thanks for adding me guys! Kyo has been complaining about this group chat for over an hour, and I wanted in so bad, but didn’t want to just invite myself.

12.

Virgil ripped his arm out of Remus' grasp.

"Scaring people is my thing, Snidely Whiplash," Virgil retorted.

13.

MC: Loser

Dan: Yeah, what about it?

MC: Oh, um, I didn’t mean it

Dan: Ah, well, I did

MC: Stop, you’re making me feel bad for you

Dan: Good

14.

Wait...I forgot I'm the author of this fanfic. I can just go inside his head. Let's do that (not literally, though, I get a little woozy when it comes to organs).

15.

Today really was a Happy Birthday, wasn't it? Molly thought to herself while jamming to music in her car. I can't wait to get home and tell Toby all about it.

16.

"Another time, I forced everyone to listen to Kidz Bop instead of original songs, claiming they were more Good Place friendly as you do. Another time I said the only people who make it to Heaven are the ones that love the movie Citizen Kane and refuse to watch anything else, so we kept watching it repeatedly as you do. Another time, I forced you to retake French, which I know you hated in high school, cuz I had Janet put a French filter on Chidi's voice...as you do," he rambled off.

"You know adding 'as you do' doesn't make it better...especially as NO ONE DOES THOSE THINGS," Eleanor said, now standing, and looking at Michael accusingly.

17.

His eyes began to water. He slid off the chair next to her. He pulled her into an embrace. She stiffened as he buried his face in her hair that hung near her neck and over her shoulder. His tears were hot as they soaked her sleeve and hair.

18.

Jane attempts to put her hands on her hips, but there isn't room. Instead, she sticks them in her armpits.

19. 

"But I-I," Meg stuttered. "NO BUTS! I want you to think about how disrespectful you've been while were gone," Juliet retorted. Olka belly laughed and whispered, "Butts!" Astrid kicked her sister in the shin.

[ahjdaily]

Episode Transcription Below:

Hi! This is Albert Hammond Jr again. I hope you'e been enjoying my festivities, my playlists, my conversations with myself. I have this next one which I'm excited about is: LA night drives. I image them to be late, maybe they're just in LA there's a lot of traffic so the later you go, the more open that it is. The freeway system is actually incredible and you can get quite far quite quickly. So these songs felt like warm air, night, low lights. This is Daft Punk with Veridis Quo, ver-di?

[Playing: Daft Punk - Veridis Quo]

I don't recommend this and I don't ride my motorcycle anymore but I used to put my in-ears in from playing and my helmet on and listen to music driving my motorcycle at night. But this was in New York and it felt like Blade Runner. So maybe that's what it reminds me in LA, Daft Punk.

The next band clearly did not ever want to get played on radio besides, they're doing heavy metal instrumentals which is already a hard one to get on radio. They've named themselves The F-ing Champs. The fudging Champs. I have two songs from them, they kind of go together in my opinion. The first song is Thor Is Like Immortal and the second one is Lost.

[Playing: The F Champs - Thor Is Like Immortal] [Playing: The F Champs - Lost]

I saw this band at a place called Brownies in New York, which doesn't exist anymore that we played at early on. That then turned into like Hi-Fi Bar. I don't know what it's called now on Avenue A between 10th and 11th. It was awesome. I do love guitarmony and so they have that. I love guitarmony so much. Uh but yeah, enjoy those instrumetnals. That is an interesting band to hear. I feel like maybe more fun to see live but I think these are probably the two best. That was the F-ing Champs with Thor Is Like Immortal and Lost. I still like that "Thor Is Like Immortal" such a heavy song.

This next song is from Adam and the Ants, it's called Cartrouble (Part 1 and 2). I think I've been chasing to write something like part 1 solo I think it's one of the coolest things ever, all the parts in the melodies. I thought we came close once with a Strokes song that never got released called Valley Guy. Maybe it gets released one day. Yeah, I think that was in my early 30s again, it wasn't a mid-life crisis okay? [Laughs] It was not! These are my later years, but I would just love this song. I think it's the perfect song. This actually might be Alex Brown again, who showed me that Jay Reatard song.

[Playing: Adam and the Ants - Cartrouble (Parts 1 & 2)]

Well, that was Adam and the Ants Cartrouble (Part 1 & 2). Next up is Bob Dylan with You Belong to Me from the Natural Born Killer Soundtrack. Can't find this song anywhere. I own it that's why I have it but I don't even know sometimes streaming services that they but it up but it is just an awesome song. I know Patsy Cline, I don't know if she was the original who did it but I just think his version is so great. I love that movie to death but this song is just up there, gets played a lot.

[Playing: Bob Dylan - You Belong to Me]

It's fun to see an artist that you like do a cover. Sonic Youth did a cover of a Carpenter song, Superstar. And it's so cool to like the song when you like the cover and the original because a lot of times that doesn't happen. The cover's usually kind of like a mess or the cover's amazing, the original you don't like. So this is very special, his interpretation of it. That was Bob Dylan with You Belong to Me. This is Ace Frehley with New York Groove.

[Playing: Ace Frehley - New York Groove]

Gus who produces and engineers everything of mine, did the Strokes fourth and fifth album, and does front of house for the band, he is a big Kiss fan. And he showed me this song probably on a drive upstate and it's just a great great song. That was Ace Frehley with New York Groove.

[Playing: Billy Swan - Don't Be Cruel]

Another cover, another great cover, another dual where the original is great and this cover is great. My friend Malcolm showed me this. Just this song has the coolest vibe, you know. Just you imagine like laying down is, this vibe with the sound, with the drums. Just the epitome of cool for me. That was really Billy Swan with Don't Be Cruel. The next song is, Yazoo with Only You. You know, I can't say something about every song right? [Laughs]

It's one of those, where you're gonna put it in there because it's one of those where I don't really know anything besides the song. And maybe there's a few of those that come up like that. I like that. That was Yazoo with Only You. This next song is Reckless Eric with Whole Wide World.

[Playing: Wreckless Eric - Whole Wide World]

There is this movie called The Adventures of Sebastian Cole with Adrian Grenier that I saw early on in New York when I first lived there, that I loved so much. Such a cool movie and that song played in it. That's where I discovered that song. I tried to do a cover of this song in my very dark days and I think I was just too high to ever do anything. That was a total disaster. I feel bad for Gus. He came over and I did absolutely nothing except hear voices. Well, that was Reckless Eric with Whole Wide World. Goodbye Eric! This is the Wipers with Is This Real?

[Playing: Wipers with Is This Real?]

This whole album is amazing. Discovered this again in the early 30s. A girlfriend played me The Misfits and stuff, played me this. I don't even think this is album- maybe it's streaming now, but I had to buy it on vinyl because it wasn't streaming. And I just I liked the whole record and I would just play it. I liked its intensity and its immediacy. I picked the song because I thought if you were gonna get into it, this might be the song that does it for you, and it'd be nice to get people into them. So I think they're a cool band. That was the Wipers with Is This Real? Next up are The Rolling Stones with Can't You Hear Me Knocking?

[Playing: The Rolling Stones with Can't You Hear Me Knocking?]

I had a whole South of France playlist and that song was on it. Constantly I vacationed with a friend of mine and then went for a few day like excursion by myself. It's very lonely. Not a good place to be for yourself. I had a beard and I would go swimming every day for hours. I was so tan and I would just like this amazing fruit and I would just get fruit and sit at the beach and eat and be salty. Like literally. I really I should post that on my story so you guys can see just how tan I was. It was just incredible. But yes, so back to the song [laughs] yeah its just one of those, The Stones really knew how to create vibe. What they might have not had in other stuff they created in vibe like that. And it was just really cool jam at the end. Really great guitar throughout the whole song.

And last but not least, if you're driving late at night, anywhere doesn't have to be in LA, since this is in the UK. I love driving in the UK, driving on the other side of the road is one of my favorite things actually. I always rent a car whenever I go there, drive I find it amusing. It also feels good for my brain, but I feel like the song ties in well with the end of this playlist and with my new record. Maybe because they just they both have a lot of drum machine on it. But I just loved Phil Collins when I was a kid, still do now. But I grew up in LA and pop radio was, you know, Whitney Houston, Elton John, Phil Collins, I just knew that stuff so well. You're whatever 9,10, 11, maybe even earlier, 8. This was a song by Phil Collins, like I said it's called Take Me Home. Just the way it starts, you don't know where it's going and even the release of the chorus isn't like huge but it's if you get into it, if you get lost in to the way the beat starts, it's really transfixing. If you're driving at night, I think that's a good thing.

[Playing: Phil Collins with Take Me Home]

Well that was Phil Collins with Take Me Home. I am Albert Hammond Jr, wishing you a pleasant evening. Good night!

"LA Night Drives" A Playlist by Albert Hammond Jr for BBC Radio 6

Albert Hammond Jr shares a playlist of music to drive to late at night, particularly in LA.

Tracklist

Daft Punk - Veridis Quo

The F Champs - Thor Is Like Immortal

The F Champs - Lost

Adam and the Ants - Cartrouble (Parts 1 & 2)

Bob Dylan - You Belong to Me

Ace Frehley - New York Groove

Billy Swan - Don't Be Cruel

Yazoo - Only You

Wreckless Eric - Whole Wide World

Wipers - Is This Real?

The Rolling Stones - Can't You Hear Me Knocking

Phil Collins - Take Me Home

[elizabethxolsenn]

But..it’s your birthday

Mama!CherylBlossom X Little!fem!Reader

The one where R Slips on her birthday

One-shot

You’re both 23

Warnings; Fluff,sweet names, mama milkies, unspecific little age

You do not have permission to, translate, post on own media. Reblogs and likes are always welcome

Today was your girlfriends birthday and you wanted everything to be perfect, you got up and wanted to make breakfast. You slipped out of bed, attempting not to wake Cheryl.

You snuck downstairs and got what you needed to make pancakes. You put the pan on the stove, and felt above it accidentally putting your hand on it. “Fudge nuggets!” You whisper-yelled. You ran it under cold water and decided breakfast was a no go.

You wrapped your hand as it started to blister. You went back to your room and slipped into bed with Cheryl. She tensed when you slipped an arm around her waist. “It’s just me Cher.” You said into her neck. She turned around and grabbed your hand.

“What happened sweetie?” She said grabbing your face. “Tried making breakfast” you giggled out. “Did my baby wrap it properly?” She asked. You almost slipped then and there. You loved it when she spoke like that, she knew it made you slip.

“Uh Yeah, Happy Birthday, M- Cherry.” You stumbled, she could tell because she smiled. “What are we doing today Love?” She asked tucking hair behind your ear. You swallow, “We’re going out for dinner tonight, but if you wanted we could hang out with the gang” you said Trying not to stumble over words. She nodded.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

You two were with Veronica, Toni, Jughead, and Josie. You sat on Cheryls lap as you all watched a Disney movie. “You like it baby?” Cheryl whispered. Toni looked over at the two of you. “Yes, I really love it.” You said almost a babble.

You’d been tripping over bigger words, and almost calling Cheryl mama from Time to Time. “Yo, Y/n. Can I speak to you?” Toni said , you looked back at Cheryl and she nodded. You followed Toni upstairs, and she closed the door after you walked into your room. “You’re slipping. It’s obvious.” She said looking you directly in the eye.

“You have no pwoof.” You said realizing what you had said. “That’s proof enough” Toni giggled. “Oh don’t tell Mama!” You said to Toni who tilted her head in pure confusion. “But she loves you?” The pinkette whispered.

“I jus’ don’t wan bofer mama” you said slurring your words, “mama birfday” a whisper came from you. You heard someone coming upstairs and immediately tried to run to the restroom. Toni caught you by your arm. “Uh-uh” she said as Cheryl opened the door.

“Hey T, Hey Baby. Why’d you run away?” She said plastering a smile on her face. Toni left the room, “Toni!” You said reaching for her. “What’s happening babe?” Cheryl said, with a grin. “I-uh. Hmph.” You crossed your arms and looked away. “You know I love being your mama right?” She said dragging you to the bed. You sat on her lap. You nodded.

“So why, didn’t you tell me you were feeling small?” You hid in her neck, “it’s your birfday” you two laid like that for a bit, she could feel your tears on her neck. “It’s okay little one.” She whispered. She pulled you from her neck and wiped your tears. “No wan mama mad! Pease.” You tried to keep your tears in.

“Oh babes, I’m not mad. I love taking care of you” she said kissing your forehead.

“Let’s go down stairs” you lit up, remembering Ronnie was downstairs. “Tan I pway wif RonRon!!” You giggled out. Cheryl nodded and led you downstairs.

“Thank god you guys are back!” Josie said looking at you, “someone was feeling small” Cheryl said looking in your direction. Veronica gasped. “Does that mean my favorite baby is with us?!” She said as a rhetorical question. You nodded fast. “Where is she? I don’t see her!” The raven girl partly yelled, resending to look around.

“I wite here RonRon!!” You giggled and and ran up to her. She scooped you up and places you on her hip. She booped your nose and you fell to a giggle fit. “Let’s finish Mulan.” Cheryl said, she always admired the way you and her friends got along, even more when you were little.

After the movie you got out of Veronicas lap and went to the kitchen. “Whatcha doin.?” The voice scared you, you turn around to Jughead and Toni. “Getting milkies” you said looking them in the eyes.

“Let us help little one.” Jug said, grabbing you a cup. “Nuh-uh! I big girl!” You yelled a bit too loud. You could hear Cheryls steps into the kitchen. “What’s going on?” The taller readhead asked.

“Someone’s a big girl apparently” Toni shrugged and walked away, dragging Jughead along. “You’re a big girl?” Cheryl said with a smirk. You responded with some noise indicating that you were big.

“Baby, what’s my name?” She asked, picking you up and setting you on the counter. You tried not to stumble, “happy birfday!” You said trying to distract her.

“You’re right, it is my birthday. If you can tell me my name you can have some cake.” You lit up, but you kept being the stubborn girl you are. “Uh-uh!” You yelled. Cheryl started to walk away. “Mama! Don’t leafve!” Yiu yelled reaching for her..

“Mama, huh? Thought you were big?” She smiled and set her chin on your lap. You began to play with her hair. You huffed.

“No, I wittle girl.” You whispered drawing out strands. She nodded and picked you up, “no what did you want?”, you looked up at her, she was about 4 inches taller than you.

“Milkies!” You said reaching for the fridge, Cheryl smiled at your little words. She looked at you and bent to your level. “You want mamas milkies or the ones from the moo moo?” She asked you smiled. Cheryl had taken a pill that caused her to lactate because she wanted to try it out for you. She ended up loving it because it made you so happy.

“Mamas!” You said reaching for her breast. “Wanna do it in the living area?” She asked, she knew her friends didn’t care, and that you didn’t but she was wanted to make sure. You nodded quickly, and drug her to the living room, everyone was watching some movie while you and Cheryl sat on the couch. You sat in her lap as she pulled her shirt down and covered the two of you in a blanket. You calmly drank her milk while she rubbed your back. You could hear her laugh at something Veronica said. You pulled away and laid your head on her chest. “You done baby girl?” She asked looking down at you. “Mhm” you groaned. You looked up at Cheryl quickly. “Woah what’s got you so quick kiddo?” Veronica said.

“What about dinner!” You said in a panic, Cheryl laid you down and brushed out your hair, “you can repay me when you’re a big girl.” She said with a sly smirk, you blushed and looked away. “Take a nap Y/n, mama will be here when you awake.” You nodded and closed your eyes. You listened to the readhead hum as she played with your hair.

🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓

Part two where R repays Cheryl?

[creepypastasomethingsomething]

No Escape

I was pretty bored, so I wrote this little one-shot for you all. If anyone has a request, you can just send them in. Also, 123 followers?! What the fudge?! Thanks to everyone who enjoys the stuff I make, I really appreciate it a lot :3 I'm actually thinking of making a second part of this.

TW: Swearing, Blood, Violence, Death, Decapitation

Ticci Toby X NB! Reader

*1,964 words*

The October night was cold and busy, trick or treaters scattered around the neighborhood wearing various kinds of costumes. Most of them were children with their family, some were teenagers, and others were adults going to parties. Police were in some places, watching and making sure everything was alright and no one was in trouble. The night was fun and happy, as usual. Nothing really bad happened in this neighborhood, it seemed. There hasn't been a murder, or attempted murder, in over fifty years, which was good.

The edge of the forest was full of life as a party was taking place. It was rather large as a family was hosting it; they invited friends and some brought their family and pets. There were many different games and the family that was hosting the party made sure that it was child friendly, as many children were there. At a table, a group of young adults from college were sitting and eating and drinking as they chatted. They were all in costumes and looked as happy as can be, a few on their phones.

"Hey guys." a tall girl their age wearing a pirate costume with a few objects in her hands walked to the table, a concerned expression on her face.

"Oh, hey Leana. You and (Y/N) enjoying the party?" A guy with freckles asked as he tapped his Ghost face mask on the table.

"Yeah, that's the thing, Jarred. I haven't been able to find them. Have, uh, have any of you seen them?"

"No." Jarred replied as he frowned.

"Do you know where they might have been?" Another guy with a Scream costume asked. Him and the other one were probably going as Billy and Stu from the famous slasher movie.

"They said they were going to go get their cousin Annie who wandered into the forest. Annie came back, but (Y/N) didn't."

"Maybe they're just lost or taking pictures of the forest?" A girl dressed as a cat hypothesizes as she fixed her cat ears.

"I-I don't know." Leana sounded worried and showed something that was in her hand. "The thing is... I found their phone and it now has a crack in it."

"What in the?" Another girl who was dressed as a clown looked at the phone. "I- Did you look for them?"

"Yes, yes I did but couldn't find anything else but their cane, lantern and mask. But I left those where I found them."

"Did you tell their parents about this?" Jarred looked at your cracked phone, and took his mask, and clutched in tightly.

"No. But I was hoping you all could go get the police while I tell their parents."

"Of course we will!" the cat girl shot up, "Right guys?" she looked towards everyone else at the table who nodded.

"Yeah, (Y/N) might be in some trouble." the second guy with the Ghost face mask shot up as well. "And I'll come with you to tell their parents."

"Thanks Xander." Leana started to look even more worried and concerned for you.

"Me, Brittney, and Saffron will go get the cops, while you and Xander will go tell (Y/N)'s parents about their disappearance.

Everyone nodded and left to go do what they were told.

---

You ran as fast as you could through the forest, careful not to trip over your dress. This Halloween, you custom made your own plague doctor costume with your close friend Leana. You had a full on mask, hat, and clothing, along with a lantern and cane, but you lost those with your phone. Your four year old cousin Annie wandered into the forest and you went to fetch her and bring her back. When she was safe you went to retrieve your cane and lantern (and mask), which you dropped when you noticed Annie was gone.

But, before you could get those, a gloved hand, cold and tasted like dirtied leather, was put roughly against your mouth. You screamed and scratched at the arm that pulled you away from the scene, but it was no use. No amount of screaming or moving around would let your capture let go of you, even if you did hit him, it had no effect. Finally, when the two of you were deep enough in the forest, your capture roughly tossed you on the grassed ground.

The fear when you looked up at the man who was now chasing you was nearly indescribable. The man had to be at least six foot and four inches, his dark hair disheveled with pale skin, and clean looking orange goggles over his eyes. He had on a dark colored coat with dark pants and a pair of sneakers; a belt was around his hips with two hatchets attached, the metal part gleaming in the moonlight. That was scary, the hatchets, but possibly the most terrifying thing about him was probably his face. On his left cheek, there seemed to be a large open gap; it showed his pink flesh and gums and his teeth.

You've seen photos and heard about a guy who had some sort of piercing in his face, showing off his teeth. You thought that was cool, a little strange, but cool. But this man, this man was not doing that. The open wound did look healed, but it was obviously a wound that was left by some sort of accident, or the man did that to himself. He quietly looked down at you, shivering and crying, and you just looked at him, too scared to get up and run.

"Not runnin', huh?" He asked you.

Hearing his deep voice made you gulp, and you swore he had some sort of accent. German, maybe. After a few seconds he reached down to a hatchet and you gasped. You got up hastily and started to run. You knew that this wasn't the way back to the party, but you ran anyways, not wanting to risk running around him. You looked behind you and saw that he was chasing after you, making you run even faster.

.

.

.

Toby chuckled and gripped his hatchet harshly in his hand. He thought it was funny that you thought you were getting out of this forest and live your life. Of course, he had strict instructions from his Master to kill you. You were doing a report of people who went missing in this forest around fifty years ago for school, and the survivors talked about a Slender Man who nearly killed them. You were getting close to knowing the truth, weird as the news reports were all destroyed. How did you get access to them? To Toby, The Slender Man was known as The Operator, his boss and the eldritch-like creature who would torture him if he didn't kill you.

Toby raised his hatchet, getting ready to toss it at you. He looked around at your body for a perfect place to strike you with it.... a couple seconds passed.... and a few more... and then he tossed it! The hatchet flew over to you and hit you in the back. You screamed in pain and fell over, tears falling down your face as you sobbed. You couldn't get up and the hatchet was lodged in your back, up a bit, and it definitely cut through your clothing. Warm blood seeped out from the wound and began to stain your clothing. You shook and Toby walked over to you; he took the old hatchet's handle and put a foot on your back, and then pulled the hatchet out, blood pouring out of the wound like a waterfall.

You screamed louder at the pain, and gripped the grass in your gloved hands. You bit your lip as you tasted your salty tears and tried to fight the pain. Maybe you would get out alive somehow? No. You were going to die. You were going to die alone in this forest by the hands of a fucking maniac and your body was most likely never going to be found. Your friends would be devastated at your loss and the town would most likely go into a panic as a crime like this wasn't committed since the early seventies.

Toby leaned down and took your shoulder in his iron grip and turned you over. You held in a scream from this; your back was bleeding, your spine most likely severely damaged, and it was touching the gross ground of the forest. Toby stomped a foot on your chest and you closed your eyes, whimpered, and gripped the grass so hard that under your gloves, your hands were probably going white.

This is it, you thought, shaking and biting your lip so hard that it started to bleed, I'm going to die in the hand of this asshole. Fuck.

Toby smiled down at you, your eyes closed and blood running down your mouth to your chin and to your neck. He raised his hatchet, and like an executioner, swung it, almost decapitating you. Your head was still on your shoulders, but it was almost off. You were still aware of what was happening. Crying harder, you tried to take a breath, but started to choke at the blood. Toby groaned and raised the hatchet and cut your head off completely.

He watched as the blood pooled around you and squirted out from your neck. You opened your eyes and looked around. What the hell. Weren't you just decapitated? Wait.... You have heard of people's heads, like Ann Boleyn, being conscious for about 4-30 seconds after being separated from the body. Your head, still half conscious, looked up at the sky and the man who did this to you loomed down, a devilish smile on his face. You frowned and tried to speak, but your eyes lidded and you started to black out.

You were dead.

Toby was told by the Operator to leave your body where it was after killing you, so he didn't do anything. He put his hatchet back where it was and looked at your body. It was too bad you died. You were young and quite the attractive person in his eyes. But oh well, he had orders to do.

Toby cracked his neck and walked away, leaving his work to rot.

The next day, a whole entire search party went out looking for you. Your friends were part of it and everyone was quite shaken up when they didn't find you. The search lasted a few months until you were found by a police officer, who almost threw up at the sight of you. You were in the same position, but bugs flew around your decomposing corpse and you had worms and maggots in your neck. When the town found out you were dead, your prediction was right. Everyone panicked.

Your family and friends held a funeral for you and had you cremated. Your body was far too decomposed to be in a casket or coffin. People thought that you being dead was connected to the mysterious murders and missing people fifty years earlier while other thought that your murder was just some sick bastard. The whole town mourned you, as you were quite popular, and they all said "They're in Heaven, flying with angels."

Little did they know that you weren't in Heaven, nor were you in Hell. You became a ghost. A headless ghost. You wander the forest, lost and scared, your head under your arm as you walk. You never saw anyone else besides the cop who found your body at your death place, so you became lonely. You were dead, angry, scared, and lost.

You knew you couldn't escape this monster named Toby the moment you laid eyes on him.

[venomous--fics]

Anon requested: Okay but imagine this: reader quarantining with Eddie (and venom too ofc)

A/n: Day 2 of the V Weekathon! How many of you guys have seen the movie so far? Inbox is open if anyone wants to request or chat!

Every day seemed to be filled with more and more boredom. You three had run out of things to do, and by the marks on the calendar, it's only been 3 days. With a huff, you slouched back on the couch and dropped the tv remote onto the cushion, "I'm bored."

"Hi, bored." Eddie replied, half heartedly waving his hand, "I'm Eddie."

You whined a little as you laid your head in his lap, looking up at him, "No, really...I think I'm gonna lose my shit if we have to stay inside any longer."

Eddie didn't even flinch, or look at you. He just took a sip of his drink and continued to stare at the tv, "This isn't exactly fun for me either."

"Or me. Don't forget me."

"Or him." Eddie added.

You ran your hands over your face, groaning, "We could take a nap."

"We just woke up from a nap."

"We could play monopoly again."

"We don't say the M-word anymore." Eddie said flatly, still staring at the tv.

"Right. Right." you sighed, racking your brain for literally any other thing to do, "Well, we couldn't play that anyways. Venom tore the board in half."

"We can tape it." Venom chirped, "I promise I won't rip it again."

"That's what you said yesterday about Chutes and Ladder's, you liar." Eddie cut in, setting his cup on the table.

"I am not a liar. I really promise to not rip things anymore."

"We could bake a cake." you interrupted them.

"We already baked two of them." Venom said, drawing your attention to the dirty kitchen where two of the ugliest decorated cakes sat on the counter.

"How about...We clean up our messes?"

You heard two sets of groans as Eddie laid his head on the back of the couch.

"Guys, c'mon, help me." you whined, kicking your feet into the end cushion, "I'm so-"

"Bored. We know."

"Bored. We know."

"There's gotta be something we can do."

There was a really long pause as you looked up at Eddie again, seeing him just stare at the ceiling.

"Anything at all." you said, twiddling your fingers, "Anything that'll pass the time."

"We have movies."

"We've already watched most of them." Eddie said, taking his turn to whine, "This shit sucks."

"We have Netflix." Venom replied, not appreciating Eddie's attitude.

You and Eddie both shared a questioning look. You opened your mouth, but Eddie seemed to speak first, "Who the hell is paying for it? It's not me."

"Who said it was OURS?" Venom spat.

You sat upright, "Venom? Did you steal someone's Netflix account?"

You were expecting an honest answer. Maybe the old lady downstairs didn't get it and gave some sort of info to Eddie. Or, more likely, Venom had overheard someone talking about it in passing.

"We don't steal- Okay, rephrasing that real fast, we don't steal personal accounts...In this household."

A small tendril whipped over to Eddie's jacket and rummaged through it before slinking back over and handing you a small, crumpled card. You took a minute to look it over, realizing that Venom had simply swiped this from some criminal or some poor soul he ate.

"Oh." you said, "Well, I mean..In that case..I guess-"

"What are we watching first?"

"We're gonna have a serious talk about your kleptomania." Eddie sighed.

"That's not a movie. Try again."

While they bickered, you picked a movie that you were certain Venom had never seen. Normally he loves- Surprisingly- Romance movies. You and Eddie would've pegged him to be, of course, the loud action type. But, no. His reasoning is that he just like how quiet and nice they are.

You picked Lilo & Stitch. It wasn't a romance, but you were sure it would check some sort of box with Venom. Eddie didn't protest much outside, "I've seen this a million times."

To which you replied, "Well, what will a million and once more hurt?"

Needless to say, Eddie was the one who wound up crying a little.

"What's wrong?" Venom almost seemed just as upset, "Didn't you like it?"

Eddie wiped his eyes on his sweatshirt, "No, it was good."

You leaned forward a little.

"Why's everyone lookin' at me?" he asked, sniffling, "It's just that the little guy didn't have a family. Leave me alone."

"It's okay, Eddie."

"It's okay, Eddie."

You, with the help of Venom, got cozy in his lap and snatched the remote, "Let's pick a movie that'll sure make you feel better."

Eddie continued to wipe off his face, "I can see you picking The Notebook. Give it here, it's my turn."

You held the remote out of his reach, trying to hit the play button.

"You said feel better, not worse." Eddie was trying to hold you in his lap and yoink the remote all at once.

While you two play fought, Venom was the one who saw his chance and took it. With the remote in his grasp, and you two at his mercy, you and Eddie joined forces in an attempt to get the remote back.

"Stop before he puts on Sweet Home Alabama again." Eddie said, trying to swipe at the tendrils as Venom tossed the remote around.

You were now standing on the couch, frantically waving your hands around, "I'll make you a hot fudge sundae!"

Venom pondered his choices, but he chose violence. You both had to deal with whatever he chose.

[wheelsup]

the taming of the shrew | two

if i be waspish, best beware my sting

after some setbacks, penelope is willing to do anything to get you back on board. but has spencer already ruined things?

A/N: hello! im so sorry that this posting schedule is super inconsistent. the more i thought about this chapter, the less i liked the more technical aspects of it. but! i hope you enjoy to plot aspect of it nonetheless <3 thanks for reading!

category: fluff, slow burn series, spencer reid x fem!reader

wc: 4.4k

<- prev | next ->

Since that phone call with Penelope, she’d been over nearly every night for a week with plates of treats and onslaughts of apologies. Each time she came knocking, you told her there was no amount of persuasion that could change your mind. And yet the following night, she’d be there, a new type of pastry in hand and a new set of reasons why Spencer was worth the trouble.

First, she brought blueberry muffins and reasoned that deep below that prickly exterior, he really was everything she promised –– sweet and caring. But that must be deep, deep down. Like, The Lost City of Atlantis, deep down, because you didn’t expect it to surface any time soon. 

Then, she brought fudge brownies and explained that his behavior wasn’t personal –– he was getting snippy with everyone lately. And while you maintained that anybody would have a hard time getting along with Spencer, you were absolutely positive that it was now impossible for you. 

Quite frankly, it wasn’t just Spencer who was unwilling to play nice. You hated him. More than you’ve ever hated a stranger. 

You wished him a lifetime riddled with minor inconveniences that would drive him to the edge of insanity. You wanted him to miss all his trains by just a quarter of a minute; close enough so that he could see it leave the platform, knowing he almost made it on. You wanted him to constantly feel like he was about to sneeze. You wanted his socks to be perpetually wet, and if he should happen to put on a dry pair? You hoped he stepped in a puddle.

That was all you could think about as you laid out on your couch, munching on one of Penelope’s lemon bars while she paced around your apartment. She kept going on and on advertising Spencer to you. As annoying as it was, she was also saving you a ton on groceries that week. 

For the most part, you filtered her out. Not a single word that came out of her mouth was believable anymore, especially not when she was talking about Spencer. Despite what Penelope thought of him, you saw in him what she refused to accept. 

As her speech came to a close, she looked at you like she expected a response to dignify her prattling. 

“Give it a rest, Penelope. He’s a lost cause,” you laughed dryly. “He doesn’t need –– nor does he want –– anyone in his life.” At the very least, he definitely didn’t want you. 

“Yes, that’s the problem!” If you’d been listening to her, you would’ve heard her saying the same thing. “He doesn’t want to date!” 

Your head just about exploded when she said that. 

There had been countless, fruitless conversations about this, and all along she saw the gaping hole in her supposedly airtight plan?

“If he doesn’t want to DATE, then WHAT was the point of this?!” Your fingers pressed the bridge of your nose; you suddenly felt a headache coming on. Funny how it always happened around the time of day that Penelope came to visit.

Penelope stopped pacing. She stalked over to your couch, picked your legs up by your ankle, and moved them to make space for herself. You begrudgingly sat upright as she took her place beside you. 

“Because he’s not himself anymore. He’s not open like he used to be. Not to the people who care about him the most, and certainly not to the world.”  

Penelope toyed with the hem of her dress, distracting herself from her quivering lip before pressing on, “Spencer Reid has always wanted love. And it’s not right that he no longer believes he can have it.” 

You hadn’t seen Penelope look so desperate until now. It was concerning. Because what could make her look so hopeless? What could make Spencer so hopeless? 

“Penelope, I don’t know what’s wrong with your little friend, but… there’s a lot more bubbling inside him than you’re letting on.” 

She chewed up the insides of her cheeks, wincing to herself at your incredibly accurate claim. 

“You are hiding something, aren’t you?” You narrowed your eyes on her. You were no detective, or whatever exactly her team did, but she was just awful at concealing her thoughts.

“It’s not my story to tell,” she murmured. 

She could already feel herself about to give it away and doubled down her mental defenses against it. Focusing extra hard on keeping Spencer’s privacy intact. If only you knew her track record with secrets, you’d be proud of her for staying quiet this long.

“What isn’t your story?” 

“That his girlfriend died last year.” 

She spilled it before she even realized what she was saying. You’d just asked so nonchalantly that she forgot she was talking aloud. Penelope turned purple, terrified now that the whole truth was out there. 

You couldn’t even take satisfaction in the fact that your trick worked. You were just as mortified as Penelope, and if you weren’t already sitting down, you knew you’d need to. You assumed there was something deeper going on with him, you didn’t think it was a dead girlfriend. That was some Nicholas Sparks shit. 

“He pretends like he’s fine but I know he’s not. And if he found a way to move on, maybe he’d start feeling as okay as he claims to be,” she sniffled before snot could run from her nose, tears lining the rims of her eyes. “I know I should’ve given you the full picture, but I didn’t think you’d go for it if you knew…” 

You were too floored to process it all right away. This added a whole new layer of complicated to an already uneasy arrangement.

“Well, I know you’re right about one thing. I would’ve said no.” 

She gave you a set of pleading eyes, praying you’d see where she was coming from. 

“I know,” she whispered defeatedly. “But maybe... now that you know, you can understand why he acts out the way he does.”

“Penelope, I can’t just… make someone move on, or –– or get them to believe in love! Especially when it’s fake.”

How on Earth did she expect you to pull that off? Did that guy from A Walk to Remember move on when Mandy Moore died? You hadn’t seen the ending of the movie, but you assumed not. 

“I’m sorry, this is just… a lot bigger than the favor I thought it was ––”

“What if I could return it?” she cut in. The gears in her head started to turn, figuring ways to patch up the holes she made. 

“There’s nothing I need from you.” 

That couldn’t be true. Penelope looked around the room and it didn’t take her long to think of it.

“I can help you sell your art,” she tempted, gesturing to the scattered canvases. “You make all your income from this, right?” 

You didn’t want to give any fuel to her fire, but you nodded. “What if… what if you didn’t have to settle for local buyers? What if I told you that you could make way more money selling them to the whole world?”

You chortled at her idea. 

You were a local artist, through and through. Your art got put in local galleries and sold to local buyers. Nothing more, and that was fine with you. You realized it a long time ago that it was just a pipe dream to think you’d be more. 

“I’m serious! You could get a separate painting studio, and stop living in one? Huh?” She wrapped her hand around your shoulder, waving the other in the air, urging you to picture it with her. “Imagine this: a kitchen that’s separate from your living room. A bed, inside it’s own four walls, and more than twelve feet from where you cook your meals.”

Pushing aside her so blatantly insulting your apartment, if that were a possibility, you’d want nothing more. But it already sounded foolish and you hadn’t even heard how she planned to pull it off. 

“Penelope, I’m fine where I am. I make the money I need, and that’s... it’s fine.”

She gave you a pointed look. “You know, I can hack all search engine results to make sure you are what comes up first anytime someone enters the word ‘painting’, right?

An airy chuckle left your lips. Of course she could. You patted her thigh twice and stood up, prompting her to follow you to your door –– hopefully, so she can show herself to the other side of it. “Still no, Pen.” 

“Just take some time to think about it!” Her voice carried through the wood as you shut it on her.

*

There was this one bench in Kenilworth Park – the one that overlooks the crystal clear pond – that you’d always been able to rely on to fix any problem.

There was hidden magic in the bushes that sprawled out from the edges of the water, surrounded by spiky green blades of overgrown grass. A simplicity you loved in baby ducklings paddling into the tiny body of water, swimming close together so they don’t get lost in, what seems to them, a whole ocean. And clarity provided by the freshest air in the world, under the shade of the big oak trees on a late summer afternoon.

But at the present, none of that came close to being enough.

The artist’s block started off as a minor inconvenience, but without your permission, had stretched into weeks of steadily declining motivation. Each new idea felt even worse than the last, and you were acutely aware that there would come a point where you’d officially hit maximum capacity for how awful they could get.

Still, that didn’t seem to light a fire under you. You happily coexisted with the blank pages of your sketchbook. Staring down at them, laying open on your lap in their stark-white glory, you felt like you were playing a waiting game. If you stared long and hard enough, maybe they’d flinch. 

Unfortunately, you never got to find out who won, because your phone rang inside your pocket. As if the caller had interrupted an incredible genius at work (which couldn’t be farther from the truth), you hastily raised the phone to your ear, slamming your sketchbook shut.

“Hello?” Your voice wasn’t as kind as it could be for someone with nothing better to be doing. Two seconds later, you learned who was calling and came to regret it.

“Hi, This is Rebecca from District Arts, calling with a message from Andre ––”

“Oh, hi!” you tried to walk back your previous tone, straightening up in your seat and pitching your voice higher, “Yeah, I’ve been waiting to hear from him!” 

While Rebecca intimidated you, Andre happened to be your closest friend at the gallery. He worked closely with the artists to curate their collection and help them make sales. 

“Does he want to sort out what to set the opening bid prices at for my new pieces?” A handful of days ago, you sent him pictures of your new work and were waiting to hear his thoughts. You’d always been able to trust his opinion, and a vote of confidence from him might be just the thing to inspire you.

“Uhm…” There was a criminally long pause on the other side of the line, ended by Rebecca’s weary inhale. “Unfortunately, we’re calling to inform you that your pieces will not be included in the next rotation.”

For a minute, you weren’t sure what to make of what she said. You’d never heard those words before.

“What – what do you mean?” you laughed nervously. She probably misspoke. Perks of friendship aside, Andre always included you in sets. 

“Ugh, let me just get him…” her voice faded away as she put the phone down. 

That wasn’t exactly the reassuring statement you were looking for. In the time it took for the call to switch hands, your confusion finally melted in. And then quickly boiled into anger.

The District Arts gallery changed their entire collection every two months. The pieces shown accepted rolling bids throughout the full eight weeks, finally selling at the end of term to their highest offer. After that, the pieces got taken down, sent to happy new owners, and the entire gallery reset with entirely new works. 

So if you missed one rotation, that meant waiting two months to get back in.

“Andre, how am I just cut from the gallery!” you barked before he could get a word in. If he didn’t like your work, he could’ve just said so. 

“No one said that ––”

“Okay, let me rephrase.” You pinched the bridge of your nose, something you found yourself doing quite frequently lately, and took a deep breath in and out. It was seemingly just for show because it did absolutely nothing to calm you down. “Why wouldn’t you put me in the next set? I’m in all of them!”

“I know you are!” He sounded just as upset. “It’s just that… we give you the biggest space we have, because you always manage to fill it up. But this time… I’m not so sure you can.”

“That’s ridiculous,” you scoffed. “What makes you say that?” You asked that, but you knew.

“You’ve only finished three pieces… I’m worried how you’ll deliver seven more before we set up.”

“But… it’s four weeks away, I could do ––”

“And it took you four weeks to make what you have... I’m sorry. We couldn’t take that gamble.” 

He took your silence as an opportunity to turn off the work talk and speak, just friend to friend. 

“You know that I trust you and I’d hold that spot if I could. But, I also know what you’re going through right now, and… I don’t know, maybe letting yourself rest would be a good thing?” 

Your heart paused. By, “knowing what you’re going through”, you assumed he didn’t mean the little artist’s block.

“If you’re implying that I can’t do my job because of what happened with Cyrus –”

“I’m not, I’m not....” he backtracked as quickly as he could. “But take another look at the paintings you showed me and tell me if they feel like you.”

Even if he was right, you wanted to fight him. You wanted to cry. You wanted to beg that you didn’t need that big space; you were willing to downsize and just turn in the three that you had. Even if they got shoved into the corner where hardly anybody bothered to look. You just couldn’t afford to go two months without the income. 

But even with tears beading up, you realized that the gallery couldn’t afford it either. They needed to bring in money and you couldn’t do that for them this time. So they were right to go to someone who can.

“Right,” you sniffled, recollecting yourself so he can’t hear the shakiness in your voice. “I understand. It’s a big risk, like you said… It’s for the better.”

Andre tried to thank you for being understanding and spewed some sort of encouragement. The words flew over your head. You managed to toss in a few ‘mhmm’s and ‘sure’s at the right places to coast you along until the call finally ended. 

As soon as it went dead, you dropped your phone to the side and brought your hands to your face, rubbing them furiously over your cheeks. Your fingertips pressed hard into your eyelids, trying to forcibly reabsorb the tears threatening to spill. 

It almost worked, until you tried to breathe. 

A full sob escaped in that one gulp of air and you succumbed to it. But the loud crunching noise of some pedestrian walking over the falling leaves destroyed your sense of privacy, and you quickly wiped away all signs of your breakdown. The crunching stopped just short of your bench and on instinct you flicked your eyes up to see who the intruder was.

You did a double take. It was him. That fucking asshole.

He was standing there, looking dumber than you could even remember, with his hands in his coat pockets and a curious look on his face as he watched you cry. Tucking your sketchbook under your arm in haste, you made it a point to stand up with as much aggression as possible, rolling your eyes at him.

“Don’t worry, I’m leaving,” you barked. “No need to yell at me this time.”

You bristled past him, barely refraining yourself from checking his shoulder as payback. You wanted to believe you were better than him, but it did sound incredibly tempting. He stood there for a moment before turning on his heel and following you.

“Wait,” he groaned.

You didn’t listen, neither stopping nor slowing down.

“I said wait,” he huffed as he caught up to you, popping up at your side and jogging along as you kept going.

“Yeah, because I need to listen to a guy who yells at strangers in bookstores.” 

Now that you’d brought up the elephant in the room, your feet started moving even faster, working double time to get you away from him.

Damn the fact that he had those long legs. He didn’t even break a sweat trying to keep up. He was inescapable.

“Well, if you waited like I asked, you would’ve gotten an apology for the ––”

“Gee, thanks!” you yelled, stopping for only a second to turn to him and give him a mocking bow of your head, hands clasped together like you were praising at his altar. “I was waiting with bated breath for that! Thank you, kind sir, for now my life can go on.”

“Look, I’m actually sorry,” he snapped. Then in realizing the irony, softened his voice, “I’m sorry for being rude. I was having a bad day… not that that’s an excuse.”

You stared at him blankly, just watching his mouth moving quickly and waiting until it finally stopped. 

“Did you need something?” 

“Did you… did you not hear what I just said?!” 

“No, sorry,” you smiled, voice sweet like sugar. “My ears filter bullshit. Wanna try again?”

He scoffed, looking away like he couldn’t believe you before stepping even closer. “What’s your problem?”

“Me!? The fuck –– what the fuck is your problem?” You turned and stormed off again, seething at his audacity. Spencer just couldn’t relent his annoying tendencies and followed yet again.

“My problem is that I’m trying to be nice, and you’re not letting me!”

You got a good, hard laugh out of that. “Okay, first of all, having to apologize for yelling at me and pushing me isn’t exactly the best starting point for the journey of becoming a nice person.”

“Like I said, I was having a bad day.” 

Under your breath, you muttered, “Well, I hope this one’s even worse.”

“Why are you such a ––” He stopped himself from finishing that thought. Even in his worst mood, he wouldn’t cross that line. 

But he didn’t need to finish it, you knew exactly where he wanted to take it. The soles of your shoes scraped against the loose gravel as you came to a grinding halt, ears ringing.

“A what?” You turned to face him, a sarcastic smile on your face growing wider as he started to shrink more and more. You got up close in his face, daring him to say what he really wanted to. So he could reinforce your belief in exactly the type of person he was. “A what?” 

Spencer pursed his lips and shook his head, refusing to say it no matter how much you challenged him. If he wasn’t going to have the balls to say it, you decided to take it upon yourself.

“Tell you what, you keep thinking about it and get back to me the next time you’re in a cunty mood.” 

The word he was thinking of was probably not as bad, but you had a habit of escalating things. Even if you took this one too far, you didn’t care. 

Before you tried to take off again, Spencer’s hand flew to your elbow. He tugged you back, forcing you to turn around and face him. He didn’t know his own strength; without any resistance, you came stumbling into his chest, at risk of falling over if it weren’t for his tight grip on your arm.

It took you a beat to push him away with both your hands on his chest, vocalizing your disgust for being so close to him. 

“Can you stop trying to disagree with me for a second? I’m trying to tell you that you’re right, I was being a… well, you know…” He avoided the word. Apparently ‘cunt’ was where he drew the line. “I’m sorry. You didn’t deserve it.” 

Your nostrils were still flared and blood hot as ever, but he made you pause. He looked sincere, if not a little tinged with guilt as well. You were suspicious of it.

“You saw me crying and felt bad, didn’t you?”

He laughed darkly. “Well, I saw you, yes. Did I feel bad? No.” 

“Oh, my God,” you growled, berating yourself for getting close to believing he might be capable of decency. 

“I’m joking! I’m joking.” He squeezed your elbow twice in earnest. “I did feel bad, but that’s not why I wanted to say it.”

“Okay.” You weren’t ready to give him a real smile, so you flattened your lips into a thin line and nodded once slowly, and left it at that. 

You still weren’t a fan, but the apology did dampen some of the resentment. Maybe he wasn’t the worst person alive. You’d settle for saying top ten most annoying, instead.

Minutes later, you came to the startling realization that he was still on the path, just two paces behind you. You flinched when you saw him out of the corner of your eye, not expecting him to still be here. 

“Uhm. Where are you… why are you still following me?” 

“I’m not. My car’s that way,” he gestured to the parking lot at the end of the long walkway. “I forgot my loaf for the ducks.” He didn’t mean to offer that information up, it just slipped out. He could practically see your smug expression coming before it even got there.

“You’re not supposed to feed bread to the ducks. It’s bad for them.”

“I don’t.” He didn’t care to explain this to you, but he couldn’t have you thinking he was any less competent than he really was. “It’s a special bread made from water and seeds that were ground into flour. It’s duck-safe.” 

“They make duck-safe bread?” Now that was something you’d never heard before. 

“No… I make duck-safe bread,” he said softly under his breath. 

You didn’t know how else you were supposed to react to that besides laughing wildly. 

“You make it?” He nodded like you were the crazy one here. As if he wasn’t the one spending his spare time grinding up seeds and baking loaves of bread for ducks, donning a frilly pink apron and oven mitts as he did so. At least that’s how you imagined it. “Why not just feed them the seeds?”

“Because, loose seeds will sink in the water and can potentially clog waterbeds and cause foreign bacteria growth in the pond.” 

“So you… hand-make the seeds into a little loaf of bread so it doesn't do that?”

He confirmed. You pondered silently for a moment, then absolutely had to ask, “You ever eaten the duck bread before?”

Spencer was caught off guard by that question. His cheeks deepened to a rosy color.

“Yeah, well, it was the house so…” he laughed nervously and stared at his sneakers. “It’s actually not too bad.”

You weren’t entirely surprised by that. You remembered what his grocery basket looked like, and given those same options, you probably would’ve tried the duck bread too. Still, you cracked the smallest of grins at knowing he makes bread for ducks. The one, sole redeeming fact you’ve learned about Spencer. 

You reached your car first, and Spencer stopped in front of it with you. 

“I’m actually sorry, you know,” he whispered once more, hand resting at the top of your car door as you opened it. He wasn’t talking about the incident at the bookstore.

“Yeah…” For a while you were so busy being angry at Spencer that you forgot about your own problems. 

He noticed your nose was still red around the edges, eyes still a little bleary. “Are you okay, by the way?” His voice was too soft, too genuine.

You shook your head no.

“Is there anything I can do?” You shook your head again. And then you had an awful thought.

You knew he was just offering to help just to say it, because that’s how people react when you say you’re not okay even if they don’t care. But there actually was something he could do for you… Something that Penelope could do.

“Uh, no but…” you fixed your hair and tucked it behind your ear, seamlessly switching to a flirtier voice. “If you still feel bad about the other day, you’re welcome to make it up to me.”

Spencer cocked his head to the side, unsure of how he could do that. 

“Hang out with me sometime.”

“H-hang out?” You could tell that it flustered him, even if he tried to play it off. He swallowed thickly, nose twitching and brows scrunched together.

“Relax, I really do just mean hang out.” You were lying through your teeth. He didn’t need to know that. 

As if he didn’t want to think about it for a second longer and just get out of this conversation as quickly as possible, he agreed without thinking it through. He didn’t even ask why an almost complete stranger would want to hang out with him. 

You stuck your hand out, expecting him to hand over his cell so you could put your contact into it. He rocked on the balls of his feet, watching as you input your contact and sent yourself a text on his phone.

“Hi, this is…” you read out your message as you typed, pausing at just the right place. “What’s your name by the way?”

“Oh-uh, I’m Spencer.” 

A devilish grin took over your face, hidden from his view while you were looking down at the screen. He was going to be easy to fool.

-

-

agh! im still not in love with how this chapter is turning out, but it came to a point where i just had to stop fiddling with it and just post it. any feedback or comments about this story is very much appreciated 💕

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[chubbology]

The Munchies

prompt: a stoner feedee's girlfriend uses him to test out new edibles and deals with his munchies

Remmy returned home from visiting relatives on the last day of December, and he was very glad to be back. They’d fed him well and his pants were tight, but all the small talk and bad vibes had been as much of a drag as usual.

He opened the door to his apartment and breathed in a familiar, potent scent.

“Baby!” Brianna ran from the kitchen and tackled him.

“Happy almost New Year! Wanna hear my resolution? Baking and getting baked. Check it out.”

She brought him over to the counter, where she was almost done filling up three containers of what Remmy had no doubt were various edibles. He ignored the kitchen mess.

“I’m liking what I see,” Remmy laughed.

She preened and then pinched his love handle. “I bet you do."

"These aren’t your typical brownies, though," she said. "This is gourmet.” She kissed her fingertips in a muah.

The first container was full of moist shortbread, the second with a kind of apple crumble dish that looked divine. Last but not least, the third had a jumble of what like peanut butter cups.

“Try something!” Brianna gushed. She seemed to be a little floaty already. “You’re gonna be my new taste tester. I think I could really be good at this. Make some cash, too.”

So Remmy tried one of the peanut butter cups. His eyes widened, and he smiled. “Bri, these are incredible.” He ate another.

“Take it easy. Two should get you stoned. So says the recipe anyway.” Brianna rubbed his pudgy forearm as he eyed the rest in the container, biting the inside of his lip. “Hey. If you’re just hungry, I can fix that. You wanna eat?”

“I’m starving,” Remmy said. A lie, since he’d had a big lunch before driving back. But he could eat.

“Okay, I’ll get you something! Pay day was Monday. Let’s splurge. What do you want?”

McDonalds, Remmy’s mind supplied easily, in an almost salacious tone. His relatives thought they were too good for McDonalds, and now his body thrummed with the desire to just get a truckload of those greasy combos and revel in the guilt and satisfaction of eating every last unhealthy bite.

Then again. Brianna probably wasn’t okay to drive right now, he didn’t feel like getting back in the car, and the scale told him he’d hit 240 recently, “Let’s just order in.”

“Sounds good to me.”

That night, as they ignored the idiots on television bringing in the New Year, the two of them picked at the apple crumble - which tasted as brilliant as Remmy had suspected - and lounged around, enjoying their high. Brianna barely touched her Chinese takeout, and Remmy ate all of his. Then hers. Then he started grazing the kitchen for more food.

Over the course of the next week, the two of them finished off the rest of what she made, plus some more recipes that turned out delicious. Brianna got a pleasant high every time, and Remmy enjoyed the edibles, too, although his experience was slightly different. It was just—

He just—

He got hungry. Munchies but on unholy overdrive. Cranked to eleven and a half. With every high, Remmy became a little more overwhelmed by the sheer amount of food he felt compelled to pack away, savory and sweet. Takeout and fast food and quarts of ice cream. Nuts and fruits, too. Jar of peanut butter here. Tub of icing there. He’d never been very active, so it came as no surprise when his clothes began stretching over his chest and belly and thighs and ass. He popped a button getting dressed one morning and couldn’t stop thinking about it the rest of the day. He hadn’t realized it would happen so quickly, his body converting all the calories into flab. Flab that padded him out chubbier than he already was, and then more on top of that. In the mirror, he started to look big.

Brianna seemed unfazed by her boyfriend’s growing girth. She took to her baking resolution with as much gusto as she did anything that interested her, and even into March, April, and May, she was selling the edibles well and raked in money that almost made her day job obsolete. Remmy was constantly praised for being “the bestest taste tester ever” and enjoyed a steady stream of free highs to balance out the lows of spending most of his time working his IT job from home.

Working, gaming, watching old movies. Remmy already stayed sitting most of the day, but as he gained weight, gained a lot, filling out his desk chair to its limits, crumbs becoming his constant companion, he felt even less like standing up. His weight climbed to 280, 290, 300.

June, July, and August passed uneventfully, and pretty happily, too. Brianna stopped asking him what food he wanted from the grocery store and just bought him things. Bought him things she knew he’d eat when he got high, things that made his ass spread wider on the couch, his arms round out like sausages, his pudgy chest start to really droop. The scale said 320, 330, 340.

Remmy gave up trying to gain control of the new appetite Brianna’s heavenly edibles seemed to install in him irrevocably. When he craved, he ate, and he ate. And like a dam breaking, his body surged with so much excess fat he began spilling out of even his newest clothes.

He was a little ashamed, sure. But quite a few of his relatives were fat, so they couldn't talk, and it felt like sweet revenge to embarrass his irritating parents by becoming so overweight. As for everyday life, well, he just moved around from room to room slower, wore the same stretchy clothes a lot, and that was it. Remmy did mention his weight in passing sometimes to gauge Brianna’s feelings about it, but Brianna only ever giggled, called him cute, and passed him her venti sugary monstrosity of a coffee concoction, which he thoughtlessly sucked down to the dregs, ingesting a thousand-plus calories just like that. This made her eyes sparkle, huge and utterly endeared.

“Like a piggy,” she said, thumbing his fat cheek. “Always willing to eat.”

In bed, she made it clear she liked him the way he was, and was becoming. And it wasn’t long before Remmy realized he was into how big he was becoming, too.

They continued like this. Getting high together and watching movies and making out and snacking. Well, Brianna snacked. Remmy feasted. Gorged himself, to put it precisely, with Brianna’s enthusiastic help. “You look good soft,” she’d tell him, playing with belly fat that his stretchiest t-shirts couldn’t cover anymore.

Remmy would swallow another bite of a snickers and spread his huge thighs a little, with effort. “You call it soft, but I’m the one who gets tired moving from the office to the kitchen.” I’m so heavy, he wanted to say. God, I’m so heavy.

“Just move your computer to the kitchen then,” she said. “Duh.”

It was a seed planted that came to fruition a month later - when Remmy’s food cravings became unmanageable and his weight climbed past 360 - that he felt he would simply be more productive during his day job if his breaks to get food from the kitchen were shorter.

By November, whether he was high or not, Remmy was grazing all day, everyday. What Brianna got from the store became insufficient, and he started a habit of ordering take out most days. In big portions. His scale creaked at 375. When Brianna wasn’t home, he sometimes ate takeout on the scale to see if the number would rise.

On Remmy’s birthday in early December, Brianna made a fresh batch of his favorites again: the peanut butter cup edibles. After ordering pizza for delivery, she got in the shower, and Remmy scarfed down three of the big cups as soon as they cooled. Then he waited, leaning against the counter, scrolling on his phone, belly hanging, feet hurting. He didn’t want to go to the effort of sitting on the couch and getting back up again when he could just stay in the kitchen, where he knew he’d end up anyway.

He scratched his supple underbelly. Found a pack of Twizzlers and started eating those.

Soon enough, his breathing slowed as he felt the high slowly come over him. And, as expected, his whole body immediately began to tingle for satiation. Fattening food sung to him from the pantry and fridge and freezer all at once, and it was all going to make him so huge and heavy he wouldn’t be able to stand on his own wide feet, but he wanted it anyway.

He didn’t care if he was pushing 390 now. He’d blown up, yeah. Inflated from a thick guy to obese and waddling. At this point, he was so pumped so big with blubber that he couldn’t twitch without jiggling, but so what? He was hungry. Being high made him want to consume, and so he did. He couldn’t stop. Didn’t want to.

Remmy opened the fridge and took out his birthday cake, which Brianna must have stuck in there after getting home from work. He couldn’t wait to eat it properly. There was no way he could wait until after the pizza came. Besides, it was his birthday. Remmy took off the plastic lid of the round, triple chocolate cake and felt his nerves light up with anticipation. He was going to eat it all, and there was no stopping him.

He found a knife and cut himself a slice three times the size any reasonable person would take. Desperate to get the goodness into his mouth without delay, he skipped a fork and bit right into the gooey, dense cake and mouse and fudge. God, Brianna was so perfect for getting him the unhealthiest cake imaginable. She knew he didn’t care if he was ten pounds heavier tomorrow, if his fat ass ripped his sweatpants open, if he ate so much he couldn’t haul himself to bed—she knew he needed this.

He ate slice after slice, and it was mostly gone when Brianna got out of the shower, looking sexier than usual in her matching purple lingerie. She’d gotten chubbier with so much junk food in the apartment, and fat clung to her in all the right places. But her pudge was a far cry from his angry-red stretch marks and neck rolls. Hell, his moobs had grown bigger than her tits.

She found him in the kitchen, eating and holding his drooping belly, and she rubbed his back, cooing at him when he apologized.

“It’s okay. I figured you wouldn’t be able to wait all night. How are you feeling?”

“Good,” Remmy said, but all he could think about was getting his next bite. As she watched him, he tried to hold out. Tried to prove he could stop eating for two seconds. Three seconds, four - his resolve broke and he crammed the rest of a slice into his mouth and chewed, choking back a moan.

“You get the munchies so bad, don’t you?” Brianna grinned and leaned against his belly, patting and cupping his weighty breasts in the way she knew pleased him. “Let’s get you sat down. I’ll bring you what you need. Just sit and relax and watch whatever you want.” They moved to the couch and Remmy sat, the cushions wheezing, his thighs and belly quivering. Brianna tucked the remainder of the cake into his pudgy hands. “Don’t worry about a mess. It’s your birthday. And there’s more where that came from.” She winked. “I just needed to keep this cake refrigerated because it’s fancy. There’s a whole sheet cake on top of the fridge that’s cheap and huge. Covered in icing. Perfect for munchies.”

Remmy could only feel a wave of relief at this news. There would be more cake. And after that, there’d still be more junk in the cabinets. There was pizza coming. His high was just right. Brianna turned on the television to his favorite show and he settled further back into the cushions, feeling his second chin swell out and engulf his first. Everything was just right. He was lucky to have Brianna and food. So much food.

A year later, around the same time, Remmy skipped his usual trip to see his relatives for the holidays. At 520 pounds, it was simply too much effort to move.

*

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