#what the fuck 😡🤬

[ladybridgertonbridgerton]

What was the point 😒

I don't want to see Sophie. Make Sophie A Man.

#Give Benedict A Husband

[blakyoo]

the fucked up thing is. i want to have tits but i dont want to lose topless privileges. or to become unable to use sleeveless tshirts without having to use a bra. what the fuck do i do man

[abby420]

lmao it’s literally a dumb fucking cartoon show about hell it’s not that deep lmaoooooo- “it’s time to lose your self loathing🎶, excuse yourself, let hope in 😊” 🥺😢😞

[jupiterj0]

Not me sobbing over chainsaw man manga…

Spoilers in tags.

[cyarsk5230]

ghatdamn it!🤬🤬🤬🤬

May the spirit of Marcellus Williams torment Parson’s sleep. May he never know rest or peace.

[ereh-emanresu-tresni]

Talking to Texans about food can be so exhausting lol. For having their cuisine so routinely being judgingly dismissed wholesale as "shitty wannabe Mexican" you'd really think they'd be more generally aware how tedious an argument that is, and yet it just seems to make them double down that much harder on calling any other regional variations even more shitty and fake ���

[astonmartinii]

the king of monza can do what he wants | charles leclerc social media au

pairing: charles leclerc x fem alonso!reader

the king of monza can win the race, have his relationship exposed and challenge his soon-to-be father-in-law to a duel, he can do what he wants.

MASTERLIST | TIP JAR

oscarpiastri

liked by olliebearman, danielricciardo and 432,095 others

tagged: lilyzneimer, yourusername, charles_leclerc

oscarpiastri: double header means we crashed on my adoptive parents' couch and forced them to cook for me (only y/n, obviously)

view all comments

user1: does he know this isn't his private account?

user2: SHUSH DON'T TELL HIM

user3: we need to enjoy this while it lasts

jackdoohan: oscar, there's still time to delete this

oscarpiastri: why would i delete this?

oscarpiastri: oh

oscarpiastri: oh no

jackdoohan: you might want to warn your kinda dad you've exposed the identity of your kinda mum as your kinda grandad is probably putting out a hit on him as we speak

fernandoalo_oficial: don't call me a grandad 👿🤬😡😠💢😤

jackdoohan: OSCAR QUICK HE'S DISCOVERED EMOJIS HE MUST BE REALLY MAD

user4: fernando, are you okay?

fernandoalo_oficial: i want that frenchies head on a stick

charles_leclerc: i am monegasque!

fernandoalo_oficial: so you do actually want to die?

yourusername: okay let's calm down old man

fernandoalo_oficial: SILENCE I WILL NOT CALM DOWN! THAT'S THE MAN?

yourusername: yes!

fernandoalo_oficial: no.

charles_leclerc: i object!

lancestroll: his eye hasn't stopped twitching since

charles_leclerc: i don't care! he might be crazy but I'M IN LOVE SO BRING IT OLD MAN

user5: wtf have i woken up to this morning

user6: the public execution of the prince of monaco

yourusername: just because he has a samurai tattoo doesn't mean he knows how to use a sword

fernandoalo_oficial: i will tear him apart with my bare hands

user7: i fear this comment section alone has undone all of his funky grandad tiktok PR

user8: he's going to make charles cry in the press conference

yourusername: oh well, charlie is hot when he cries

user9: and how do you know that...

yourusername: that's none of your business 😈

yourusername

liked by oscarpiastri, maxverstappen1 and 2,312,088 others

tagged: charles_leclerc

yourusername: italy has my heart and so do you <3

view all comments

user11: queen got exposed and immediately started flexing her unbelievably sexy bf

yourusername: why wouldn't i? he's so damn FINE

charles_leclerc: teehee (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)

user12: you might as well have told me to kill myself

fernandoalo_oficial: enjoy your weekend charles, it will be your last

charles_leclerc: and if i win? i think suspended sentence?

fernandoalo_oficial: @carlossainz55 i have a proposition for you

yourusername: why are we acting like he wouldn't do that for free

carlossainz55: excuse me?

yourusername: i'm calling you a jealous bitch xx

carlossainz55: what is your price nando?

fernandoalo_oficial: i'm not fucking paying you, i was assuming you'd do it in a jealous rage anyway

carlossainz55: ???

user13: the way carlos is being jumped from both sides unprovoked

user14: which ever alonso it is, they choose violence

oscarpiastri: so ... am i off the hook yet?

yourusername: you know we can't say no to you

fernandoalo_oficial: oscar you might actually be my favourite now, thank you for bringing this to my attention

oscarpiastri: sure i'll take it!

charles_leclerc: you can have my heart and everything else for as long as you want

yourusername: looks like you'll never get it back ;)

charles_leclerc: that's fine by me if i get to spend it with you

yourusername: i love you :P

charles_leclerc: i love you more ( > 〰 < )♡

fernandoalo_oficial

liked by jensonbutton, aussiegrit and 1,209,566 others

fernandoalo_oficial: cash prize for anyone who can actually track down this little rat - i just want to talk i swear

view all comments

user15: it's official everyone, he's gone crazy

user16: as crazy as he is at least he's bringing the DRAMA 🤩

yourusername: this isn't very peace and love of you

fernandoalo_oficial: that has never been the way in this family

fernandoalo_oficial: but let me make this clear, i mean in a destroy all of your enemies way rather than a jos verstappen way

maxverstappen1: ???

yourusername: destroying our enemies does not mean you can do your best jos verstappen impression and drive your aston martin into charles

fernandoalo_oficial: don't be stupid y/n, the aston martin is too slow, i'm going to steal his brakes

yourusername: and how will you do that boomer

fernandoalo_oficial: ferrari are stupid they probably still haven't changed the passwords or locks since i left

yourusername: @scuderiaferrari excuse me???

scuderiaferrari: ....

user17: so like this is a genuine hit?

user18: mob boss!fernando alonso you are so special to me

user19: sorry charles but it's so sexy

charles_leclerc: drop the address senor i'm not scared of you

lancestroll: he brought the samurai sword btw

yourusername: @f1 DO YOU PEOPLE HAVE ANY SECURITY MEASURES ???

f1: it made a good tiktok 👍

yourusername: you people are useless

charles_leclerc: no worries my love it's all under control

fernandoalo_oficial: i will carve you like a christmas turkey

yourusername: you go anywhere near charles with that sword we're both going romeo and juliet style

user20: what on earth is going on

user21: just smile and wave i think we're watching collective hysteria

f1

liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri and 3,562,778 others

tagged: charles_leclerc

f1: CHARLES LECLERC WINS FOR FERRARI AT MONZA

view all comments

user23: bro heard fernando was gonna steal his brakes and simply just drove so fast he didn't need them

user24: he was like 'oh you want my head on a stick? TRY AND CATCH ME'

yourusername: pretty boy is so so talented it's not fair

yourusername: who am i kidding

yourusername: STUNT ON THOSE HOES I LOVE YOU BABY

charles_leclerc: thank you baby, i simply had to drive so fast so i could give you a kiss

charles_leclerc: and also so i could tell your dad to SUCK ON THAT OLD MAN

user25: he's had too much champagne and might actually get himself killed

user26: i will throw myself in front of that sword for him

yourusername: you and me too buddy - i'll cover your drinks for this evening

fernandoalo_oficial: i still want him dead

charles_leclerc: what the fuck do you want from me? i just won? did you see that freak of an orange car? i look after your daughter like i looked after those tyres

yourusername: so romantic 🤭

fernandoalo_oficial: he just compared you to tyres? have some standards i raised you better?

yourusername: believe me, i do have standards - he's special xx

fernandoalo_oficial: i also won monza with ferrari he's not that special

user27: at least he's stopped with the samurai sword talk?

user28: he did say he still wants him dead though

maxverstappen1: @yourusername why couldn't you have dated lando? would've made this championship a lot easier

landonorris: HUH?

yourusername: please refer to my previous comment about standards

charles_leclerc: hehehehehe

landonorris: HUH???

charles_leclerc

liked by oscarpiastri, maxverstappen1 and 4,523,099 others

tagged: yourusername

charles_leclerc: grazie mille tifosi !! this is for you and all of your support. i'm glad my family and my love were here to see this win as well. fernando, bring your sword, i'll fight for your daughter's hand.

view all comments

user29: i love this family and i've known them a week

user30: fernando might have to go through me as well at this point

yourusername: i love you so much and you have deserved this and more for so so long xx

charles_leclerc: i couldn't do it without you (and our weird little grid family)

yourusername: you're my favourite person in the world and i just love to see you happy

charles_leclerc: you make me the happiest man in the world

yourusername: i love you

charles_leclerc: i love you too

user31: as cute as all this is ^^ where is this duel

user32: can someone PLEASE STREAM IT !!!!! I WILL PAY

user33: I NEED IT I NEED IT

fernandoalo_oficial: come outside

lancestroll: he spent all of the debrief sharpening the sword btw

charles_leclerc: i'm ready girlypop

fernandoalo_oficial: GIRLYPOP ???

yourusername: PEACE AND LOVE BOZO

maxverstappen1: can we get this show on the road please?

lewishamilton: charles please hurry up i've got some serious cash on this tussle

yourusername: how much we talking?

charles_leclerc: i might die and you're checking the wager?

yourusername: because i have faith in you !!!!

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, fernandoalo_oficial and 2,136,344 others

tagged: charles_leclerc

yourusername: he's alive and he's a winner! the king of monza can do what he wants

view all comments

user35: prince of monaco? king of monza? bro is collecting titles

yourusername: my husband next 🤞🏻

charles_leclerc: bet

user36: is ANYONE GOING TO TELL US WHAT HAPPENED IN THE DUEL

georgerussell63: it was extremely unprofessional and there will be an extensive powerpoint covering how this won't happen again

fernandoalo_oficial: i'll fight you next time george

user37: don't go off TOPIC

charles_leclerc: i out strategised him lol

oscarpiastri: what he means is that he surprised fernando from behind and wouldn't stop hugging him until he agreed that he wouldn't skewer him like a kebab

charles_leclerc: and it worked! now look he's on my boat giving me his blessing

user38: you're telling me charles hugged his way out of the conflict?

user39: perhaps the most babygirl he's ever been

user40: we need the pictures SHOW IT TO ME RACHEL

fernandoalo_oficial: fine, i guess he's okay. i'm not calling him the king of monza though

yourusername: i knew you'd come around

fernandoalo_oficial: i love my daughter SORRY

yourusername: don't lie to me you only calmed down and accepted it because i called in the reinforcements

user41: i'm crying she called babysitters for her dad

yourusername: jenson and mark, idk how you deal with him

jensonbutton: the stress of him and his antics keep me skinny

aussiegrit: i think we're all trauma bonded

charles_leclerc: i'll be the king of monza, if you'll be my queen

charles_leclerc: and i will continue to do what i want

yourusername: i'll be your queen anywhere you want

yourusername: and if doing what you want includes fighting my dad... let's turn it down a lil

charles_leclerc: for you, i'll do anything

fin.

note: here yall go - this was in my drafts half done from monza weekend but life got crazy

[strawberry-pretzels]

ugh i don't have ideas for like this whole thing i'm trying to write. literally insane.

[stephstars08]

WTF IS THE DEFENSE DOING!?!?!?😡😡😡

[antiherotheugly]

my god do i want to fucking kiss her and make out with her for hours......

[chrisevansonly]

12 𝐅𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐀𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 | 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐬

ʚsocial media au

ʚlando norris x female leclerc!sister reader

ʚlooks like your brothers are going to be seeing a lot more of lando…but that doesn’t mean the 6 foot rule is up..

ʚnot requested but i just wanted to do a little something! you can read part one here! <3

yn.leclerc

liked by landonorris, arthur_leclerc, lilyhme and 213,000 others

surprise i chopped my hair off!!!! (pls don’t break up w me lando)

see 5,000 comments

username OMG THE SHORT HAIR?!

username no this is everything

charles_leclerc tres belle mon soleil 🩷

>yn.leclerc merci charlie 🥺🥺

username me waiting to see what lando says 👀

landonorris HELLO

>yn.leclerc hi baby🥰

landonorris WOW BABY WOW

landonorris you’re so beautiful 😭

>arthur_leclerc alright relax romeo, she’s been wooed enough

>leclercpascale arthur soyez gentille avec lando!

leclercpascale c’est si gentille ma belle!😘

>yn.leclerc merci maman!!❤️❤️

landonorris

liked by maxfewtrell, yn.leclerc, lorenzotl and 567,000 others

mini getaway with my girl, and yes i beat her playing chess

tagged yn.leclerc

see 17,000 comments

username she’s so beautiful :(

username i love their relationship

username i saw somewhere that lorenzo actually pushed them to be together���👀👀

>yn.leclerc he did, he loves lando 🥰

>lorenzotl love is a strong word…

>yn.leclerc admit it pls☹️

>lorenzotl okay okay fine…he makes you happy so he’s family

username AWWW ENZO LOVES LANDO😭😭

liked by landonorris

yn.leclerc thank you for my little trip i loved it and i LOVE you(i beat you 4 times before you finally won)❤️❤️

>landonorris i love you more (don’t air that out..)😘

username i could sob my eyes out right now

leclercpascale oh j’aime les fleurs!! très magnifique!

>landonorris j'en ai pris pour vous maman leclerc! 😁

username LANDO BUYING MAMAN LECLERC FLOWERS😭

yn.leclerc

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, charles_leclerc, landonorris and 432,000 others

bored waiting for lando to come home, oh yeah i forgot to mention we finally settled into our new house🥰

tagged landonorris

see 20,000 comments

username SKIN CARE ROUTINE PLS

>yn.leclerc it’s on my youtube!! same with makeup🥰

username oh to be her!!!!

username aww her and lando live together now😭

charles_leclerc he needs to be 12 feet away from you at all times

>yn.leclerc char it was 6…..why double it?

>charles_leclerc because you live with him now🙄

landonorris i’m coming home in 5 with your favourite for dinner!❤️

>yn.leclerc and this is why i love and adore you baby😘

username 🥹🥹🥹

arthur_leclerc still not onboard with you moving out. come back now.

>yn.leclerc awww thur it’s okay to miss me…i miss you so much :(

>arthur_leclerc 😪❤️

charles_leclerc

liked by yn.leclerc, mclaren, pierregasly and 657,000 others

mon soleil is this your man?

tagged yn.leclerc, landonorris

see 31,000 comments

username CHARLES 😭😭

username there is no way he posted this

username only brothers would post this shit

mclaren that’s one of our papaya boys!😁🧡

liked by landonorris

yn.leclerc CHARLIE!!! CE N’EST PAS GENTIL!!! 😡

>yn.leclerc but yes, yes he’s mine 🥰🥰

username y/n to charles: 😡😤🤬😾 y/n to lando:🥰🩷🌸🫧

landonorris mate….

landonorris this is just how did you even get these

>charles_leclerc never telling🌝🌝

>username the moon emoji😭😭

arthur_leclerc

liked by carla.brocker, landonorris, yn.leclerc and 233,000 others

mon ange is this your man?

tagged yn.leclerc and lando norris

see 24,000 comments

username NOT ARTHUR TOO😭😭

username oh my fucking god

lorenzotl 🙄🙄🙄

>arthur_leclerc traitor.

yn.leclerc MAMAN!!! @:leclercpascale

>leclercpascale 🤦🏼��♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️

username even pascale is done😭😭

landonorris i’m not even going to attempt to form a sentence or thought

>yn.leclerc i’m sorry my love 🥺

>landonorris it’s okay baby, i have my own revenge planned someday 😏

username the leclerc and norris war is about to begin!!!

liked by landonorris

yn.leclerc

liked by mclaren, landonorris, lorenzotl and 435,000 others

my man my man my man (stay hating charles & arthur😚)

tagged landonorris

see 15,000 comments

username he looks so happy

username i love them together

username MY ROMAN EMPIRE

landonorris awww🥹

landonorris i love you forever and ever

>yn.leclerc and ever and ever!!

leclercpascale mes bébés ❤️❤️❤️

liked by yn.leclerc and landonorris

username okay but they’re so cute together

charles_leclerc 🙄🙄

>arthur_leclerc 🙄🙄

>maxfewtrell💀💀

username i feel like max finds this hilarious tbh

>maxfewtrell i do💀

landonorris

liked by maxfewtrell, yn.leclerc, leclercpascale and 632,000 others

the boys & the princess (aka our babysitter, love you baby)

tagged yn.leclerc and maxfewtrell

see 43,000 comments

username y/n looks SO over it😭

>yn.leclerc i promise i wasn’t, max and lando are just SO annoying when they drink together 😭

username HAHAHAHA y/n outing max and lando

maxfewtrell i’m not that bad…

>yn.leclerc BRO BE SO FOR REAL

charles_leclerc blink twice if you need help soleil

>yn.leclerc 😳😳

username please charles sends me everytime

username poor y/n

yn.leclerc you owe me.

>landonorris thank you baby, i know just the thing😉

username i can’t tell if that a suggestive wink or a normal one…

yn.leclerc

liked by landonorris, carla.brocker, arthur_leclerc and 657,000 others

life lately, lots of love, family and oh yeah…lando definitely made it up to me🥰💍

tagged, leclercpascale, charles_leclerc, arthur_leclerc and landonorris

see 68,000 comments

username OMG NO WAY😭

username these photos are so cute🥹

alexandrasaintmleux congratulations beautiful❤️

>yn.leclerc thank u lex!!! love you😚

username HOLY SHIT THEY’RE ENGAGED?!

carla.brocker AWW congrats!!!🥺

>yn.leclerc thank you sissy!!🩷🩷

leclercpascale felicitations a vous deux! ❤️❤️

liked by landonorris and yn.leclerc

charles_leclerc fine…i guess lando’s okay..congrats you two❤️

>yn.leclerc thank you charlie🥰

username THIS MADE MY DAY!

arthur_leclerc i guess welcome to the family….still 12 feet apart 😒🖤

>lorenzotl ^^^😁

>landonorris i’ll take it LOL

landonorris i love you forever and ever❤️

>yn.leclerc and ever and ever😘

[kalims]

ㅤdorm leaders being savages

summary. basically some backstabber mf tries to 'steal' him and... this is where the savage part starts

featuring. dorm leaders

content. bad friend, gender neutral reader, brutal rejection 😭

note. a full post after a while :')

malleus

I mean it's not like he would notice anyways, again. I firmly believe human and fae courting traditions are vastly different and c'mon... he doesn't even know what the fuck flirting is do you really think he'd get their intentions. 💀

when they start to slide up an arm in places he's quite bothered about, (cause guy is so whipped that he won't let anyone but him touch you.) he isn't even happy that someone is near his proximity anymore, not scared and whatnot.

just he no likey.

AND HES NOT EVEN TRYING TO BE ROMANTIC HE JUST SHRUGS THEM OFF EVERYTIME. he's just a genuine innocent lil' dude who wants his lover to come and save him from this touchy, weird, human.

no child of man cause that's your name ‼️

while he may not get it, he's got a feeling, sixth sense of sorts and when he sees it he's backing tf up away. he's not gonna entertain the doubts.

also he still doesn't get it in the end lmaoooo, he's avoiding all their advances thinking it's a part of human... culture? that he wasn't made aware of.

if they start putting in the forbidden words in the same sentence as your name you know shits going down, suddenly he's not that confused, oblivious, cute guy that they saw but a much colder shell.

when his eyes darken, and it starts storming they'd had better run, he's been kind enough to stay even with their relentless annoying behavior but that is where he crosses the line fr.

don't even be surprised when they get hit by lightning and end up in the infirmary or something, malleus didn't even say anything to them cause he believes actions speaks louder than words... *sends touchy, weird human to the nurse.* see?

someone insults him: ?

someone insults you: 😠😡🤬👿🌩⚡

just goes: "your friend is very unpleasant, I'd appreciate it if you refrain from spending time with them."

something unsaid; spend all of that time with me duhhh

idia

you know what I'm surprised someone actually likes him tbh 😭 except us because we're all built different and we love disgustang discord mod behavior.

you know what's even more surprising? the fact that idia is actually seen by your friend group. I swear he comes out of his room like once a day and that's just because he's craving something else that isn't in his food stock and he's just gonna rob whose mac n' cheese was in the microwave.

and that's literally in his DORM ONLY.

he's like a vampire and allergic to sunlight, he's more willing to come out in the middle of the night because that's when the least 'normies' are scattered around like flies.

(if that counts for anything at all??)

but hanging out is more fun and if you somehow managed to convince idia to come with you with your friends for some well needed, 'socializing' then you're in luck!

besides that you had to bet one of your items in that open world game you played together... all is good!

im like 99% sure idia is disgusted by any other touch from other people, besides you? cause if you touch him he's just embarrassed... but in terms of the disgusted faction, you've been there before.

he immediately spots their intentions cause he definitely plays otome games and this is one of them cliche scenarios to 'spice up' the plot by invoking jealousy in it.

only difference is its him, you and this... random.

if they weren't already offended by the absolute mortification and disgust on his face, somehow continuing to 'rizz' him up.. oh boy. it's gonna get worse.

he's got the worst fucking 3rd grade insults like... "back away from me you noob, are you supposed to be their friend?" he scoffs, surprising them cause they thought he was gonna be that red flag discord romance experience.

"sorry but im not really sorry. i don't associate myself with lower levels such as yourself, try to come back when you're higher but I doubt they'd accept a fiend back."

LIKE WHO USES NOOB AS AN INSULT?

when you come back he's steering you away, pulling on the hem of your sleeves practically begging to come home with the promise of 'grinding that outrageous drop rate item you've asked his help with.'

something unsaid; doxxing them as soon as I get back

vil

ok this one I get.

who wouldn't want vil... it's not like I've made the entirety of the fandom known about my obsession with him as my favorite character or anything, not at all... jokes aside he's a very prominent candidate, he's hot and rich. you get it?

forget about the other qualities because we all known those two can carry someone in life alone, life in luxury and fame? sign them up ASAP.

besides your boyfriend being one of the superstar actors, models, the dream jobs for a dream man even your friends had a hard time believing you. you should be offended that they even considered that you were clinically.. delusional.

plus you didn't even seem to know about vil before so how are you dating him?!

they found out the hard way and safe to say they're flabbergasted because what even?

of course out of everyone here, vil has the most experience in terms of being approached on a baseless appearance only, he's iffed by how fast people get infatuated when they're barely scratching the surface of him.

well, you somehow dug your way deep with a shovel so you're the only exception he will allow...

at this point he knows what to expect the moment one of your friends gave him a look he's all the well too accustomed to. it's easy to ignore the ones he sees in crowds cause there's always some type of fence blocking them from fully proclaiming their love or something.

problem here is that this person has no obstacles and he can tell they're waiting for an opportunity to strike like a snake. *texts the pomefiore gc to tell them about this SNAKE!*

honey this is a big NO for him, you need to consider your circle of friends if one of them immediately starts folding around like this and wastes what? a longer friendship with you? please, he's known his stylists more and they literally get replaced every single day.

he's giving them the biggest, sassiest side eye ever. putting a palm up before they even get to speak because frankly, he does not want to hear it.

they open their knarly mouth. "i—"

he raises a finger. "no."

a frown. "but i—"

"shush."

he can do this forever.

when you come back he's still giving a bombastic, criminal offensive side eye, mentally thinking on how to ruin this person's life in media of course! his natural domain. just one word and the rest of his army will attack fr.

vil usually doesn't do this but seriously? that was another level of low.

also he's just by your side, you don't even have to say that he's your boyfriend because he's lowkey rubbing it in their face that he is in fact, taken.

"next time you try to see me again, might as well buy one of the tickets to my fan signings because you’re not seeing me again otherwise.. well, not like you can afford it anyways." *fabulous hair flip*

something unsaid; either way I'll kick you out if you try to get in

kalim

most safest person to flirt with, even if you're friends with their lover but also the most impossible to actually try and 'steal.'

the thing about kalim is that he's adorably stupid, not to degrade him in any shape or form but he's so oblivious about everything that you could consider it as one of his redeemable traits to be adorable.

he takes everything you say so seriously to the point where if you joke about wanting to water an entire continent he's just there with his carpet waiting for you cause he's gonna do exactly that.

"you're in luck cause I have a lot of water in me!" pops his non existent guns on his arms. (he is talking about his unique magic..)

it takes a remarkable mind to be like... that but you like him all the well about it, compliment his stupid-ness and he'll just grin, flush a little and laugh loudly as he compliments you back. not an ounce of anger in his tiny body.

red eyes but what a bright heart!

the type of guy that goes. "any friend of yours is a friend of mine!" so when he meets your friend group, casually just throws them a grand ball. they don't know whether to be flattered or.. concerned cause this is pretty weird.

not only was one of your friends awed over the mere value of many things inside the dorm he renovated, apparently his very huge bank full of gold was something to gasp over too.

and that's exactly what they did. (I mean get that bag sis but that bag is already owned by someone else and that's you... so that's not slay of you, random friend.)

here's when his nature proves to be quite relenting, even after many flirting, even using those cringe pickup lines from the internet, he just won't budge! it's getting irritating cause they're sure the people already heard the embarrassing words coming out of their mouth.

also that they were flirting with a non-legally married man. (to you ofc ofc.)

kalim either laughs at them because he thinks they were jokes, and just funny or laughs just because he's kalim.

he didn't really mind the casual touches at first, maybe it was friendly? he does it all the time after all but there was a stinking feeling that it felt weird and that alone was weird cause friendly pats were supposed to feel good.

not with you though cause those feel great!

accidentally shuts them down cause they're feeling like a third wheel when you come back after a bathroom break and it's like a total contrast to how he was treating them.

how do you seriously not notice kalim now unintentionally flirting with you?! are both of you airheads?!

he was literally all over you when you quipped up a "hi, I'm back."

and he was like; "welcome back :DDDD!!!!" if it wasn't already obvious they'd even add floating hearts emojis all over his head.

something unsaid; girl he didn't even notice anything was up...

azul

kinda a 50/50?

I'm not sure if most people really dig the whole 'bad reputation' thing. he's friends with the most terrifying twins in the entire campus, notably scammed a lot of people, can give wishes with an extreme price.

oh yeah he runs monstro lounge too but that just means he won't have time to spend with a lover.

that's their own imagination but azul's actually very sweet and gets some overworked junior to do the work for him, usually jade since floyd just leaves if he's given the job. JUST so he can go fret over which tie to use for your unofficial date.

despite him annoyed and losing sleep 24/7 because of the tweels he still asks them which one to use, jade's opinion is most trustworthy since floyd picks the neon, vibrant ones. (don't question why he even owns it.)

I doubt he actually likes people though, anyone else than you? hard pass. he's a simp through and through but unlike idia who can't mask the mortification and disgust on his face even at the cost of his life, good thing that masks are one of the many things azul is good at.

he slips up sometimes cause he genuinely thinks it's embarrassing that they're doing whatever this is to him, (well more of an attempt?) and to you, who is also their friend and his lover.

slip up as in his eye twitches, he flinches away a little too fast when they touch him, and his smile wobbles.

I mean no one would notice if he uses his magic on one, singular person...

mentally makes a note to remember whoever this was cause they're not stepping foot in octavinelle ever again.

+ an object of fun for the tweels. #gotormentthatlife!!

he's just a polite guy, so he won't just straight up insult them but he does warn them. the only thing holding him back from cooking a whole table is the crowd that would definitely spread the news of him going batshit.

like; "could you please, stop this? I hope you're not as stupid as you make yourself out to be because if you think I'm an idiot to not know what you're doing.. "

meanwhile his mind; "ugh this bitch. [redacted] [redacted] [redacted]."

I mean he's not that intimidating ALONE but when he gets all threatening like that (🥰) he could pass for an assassin fr.

just gets the tweels to deal with them cause he does not have the patience to deal with this backstabbing ho and it's wasting his precious time that should have been spent talking with you.

ugh he did not spend like 30 whole minutes picking out his tie and gloves just for this.

azul when he sees you coming back: 😇

something unsaid; [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] [redacted].

leona

oh boy, cover your eyes cause we're stepping onto another level of SAVAGE. you don't call lions that for NOTHING ‼️ beastman or just beast.

has the least filter out of everyone, as in he just doesn't give a single fuck, he's the chillest (agressive) guy on the twst planet so if the thought of wanting to insult some stranger that doesn't have a significance in his life at all pops up in his mind he ain't gonna change it lol.

gives the stinkiest eyes, even his tail and ears pause to synchronize with his thoughts cause if they had googly eyes they'd have a side eye too.

if he's laying down and they try pulling him upwards, tryna latch onto him? *just shoves them cutely.* problem solved.

leona's nice enough to let them off without losing something cause you really do mean something to him if he's holding back for your expense knowing that this is one of your 'friends.'

they don't even deserve to be called that!

like no one interrupts his peaceful nap times except for when he stands up to interrupt it himself just to drag you down with him.

wait so basically anyone but him???

he, really doesn't want to waste energy on this fool and to be honest they're really boring him since you went out to grab something you forgot. (but knowing this person for less than an hour in his life, they probably had something to do with that too.) so you aren't here to give him a reason to stay awake.

them rambling but in leona's eyes they're a blurry figure cause he's really sleepy.

then suddenly he's an iphone promax when he's looking at you 💀

if they already didn't take a hint from his earlier shove, the dirt isn't the only thing he's gonna shove someone into. there's a lake there for a reason other than keeping a home for the fishes y'know. never would know if they eat people too. /j

"would you shut up?"

yeah that's all he says but we all know how sharp it is to hear that from somebody so they immediately shut up. there's absolutely no need for any waste on energy of them, just one look from him and they're SILENT.

hopefully embarrassed too cause wtf was that??

unfortunately he can't fully enjoy his usually relaxing nap cause this random is corrupting the atmosphere even when they're silent, I swear they could shift and leona feels like one step closer to smacking 'it.'

ignored them every single time they tried to call out to him LOUDLY before but when you just silently step back on the field, he already peeks out an eye??? like no words needed.

what love does to a mf... sighs... another cold male lead we've lost to romance because of our mc <4

something unsaid; I was really questioning if keeping myself from strangling someone was worth it. took more effort than doing it literally

riddle

I'd have a crush on him too tbh.

unlike azul who already knew their intentions from the start, polite enough to kindly drop signs that he's not interested. riddle doesn't get it, he's just polite as well but also confused?

like he doesn't know they're tryna flirt, but he does think their actions are strange like c'mon. why are they trying to feel him up? he has no idea except the thought that he doesn't like it at all.

also it feels like he's betraying you so he just straight up pulls their arm away off of him firmly and shakes his head.

"stop this behavior."

he sighs.

surprisingly he's patient but also impatient???

consider this the first and last warning cause he WILL excuse himself if it ever goes on, riddle can wait for you browse through a whole store with him following you around and playfully commenting on your taste but can't wait for their attitude to get better.

he ain't gonna waste any more of his precious minutes on this period.

I don't know how to explain it, he's totally unaware of what they want, which is him ironically. but the reason he's rejecting their advances is because he's so devoted and a simp for you.

not a lot of people have the balls to converse or touch around him carelessly like that so freely so isn't it basic human courtesy to hold off all the physical affection till they're more acquainted?

well, not that riddle's not gonna let their current relationship advance any further from strangers at this point...

he's so loyal to you that it's cute jabskans.

riddle sticks to his principles, and he certainly has his own preferences for the personality of people. one of the traits he despises is when they don't understand his earlier warnings.

of course riddle isn't very forgiving, they're lucky they were even given a chance before cause even he, doesn't spare his dorm members a second chance when they break a rule he's been plenty lenient with.

so if you were given a chance, you better take it cause he's not giving you another.

like how since you did take your chance he's not gonna let you go now 😍.

isn't the type to be rude to people for matters he deems conflict being easily avoidable so he just makes up a believable excuse and walks away loool.

and they're like thinking; didn't he say he was tired and had to sleep since he stayed up planning the unbirthday party... why is he having a tea date with you???

suddenly he didn't look too tired at all compared to when he randomly slumped to look exhausted before??

something unsaid; 🥰🍵 what a successful unbirthday party *forgets about them immediately cause you're both having an unofficial date.*

note. ok so something unsaids are basically that but don't misunderstand, it's something they didn't say.

[jistagrams]

best interest p.sh

pairing: park sunghoon x fem! reader

warnings: smut, zestyish jokes (Jake and sunghoon are basically In love idk), cursing, unprotected sex (wrap it before u tap it!!), kinda mean? dom sunghoon, pervert sunghoon, slight choking, not proofread, lmk if I missed anything!

minors dni!!

Friday 6:10 pm

what sunghoon didn't expect was to fall in love with you, living together just made him crazy, seeing you walk around in a big tee with just panties under?? yeah. "She won't even let jay hit" sunghoon ranted to his friend on facetime, "maybe shes a virgin and she's saving it for someone special" Jake replied, placing a kiss on his girlfriends head turning off his mic. "I'm someone special!" Hoon whined throwing his phone on his bed, "I guess not to her" Jake turned his mic back on snickering. "Should I fuck her best friend to get revenge.." he started questioning his own existence, hes never been this crazy over someone. did you cast a love spell on him or something? "her best friend is haechan" Jake set up his phone on the table, showing him as he put his headphones on and turning on his console. "ok nevermind. would rather kiss you than fuck haechan" "you would kiss me?" "hell no." "then why say it you got my hopes up" "..jake shut the fuck up" Jake laughs as the light from his computer reflected on his face. "yk what you should do, try and seduce her" he proposed, "that doesn't sound that bad, how would I even do that" sunghoon replies, finally picking his phone up from the bed to walk into the kitchen. "mmm, since y'all live together try walking around like shirtless or like... loudly jerking off??" Jake bit his nails while thinking, "holy shit your gonna make me get a restraining order" sunghoon laughed out loud, hearing the door unlock he quickly hung up and texted Jake "she's home, gonna take ur advice istg if she calls the cops on me you'll never see ur stupid apex acc again."

Friday 8:56 pm

he was nervous, obviously. he wasn't nervous about how he looked, he knew he looked good. he was just nervous on how your reaction would be, he hyped himself up in his room for a bit. doing some pushups till he walked out of his room shirtless knowing your in the kitchen, "yn" he spoke out to you, making you turn around to look at him. "why are u naked" was the first thing you said to him since you got home. "gonna take a shower, u cooking anything?" "Nah, I'm ordering food I'm just in here eating chips", clearly looking unfazed, "should we order something then?" He replied. Walking into the kitchen, sweats hanging low. Showing a obvious bulge, "I'll just get pizza u go take a shower, you stink like sweat" you looked away from his piercing gaze. He chuckled, "mm, ok let me know when the food comes I'll get it" he says while walking away and into the bathroom, quickly locking it and holding his head in his hands.

sunghoon : She won't even look at me 😭😭💔💔💔💔💔😢

Jake : maybe ur js butt ugly.

sunghoon : this is not helping idiot

Jake : did u walk around shirtless 🌚

sunghoon : YES BRO. even wore my baggy jeans to show extra 🤬😡

Jake : what if she's into girls...omg sunghoon I'm cooking here

sunghoon : only thing ur cooking is that burnt ass hair.

Jake : fuck u times 10 😒

sunghoon : u wanna fuck me 🌚

Jake : my gf just saw that msg without seeing the name I hope yn never ends up liking you.

sunghoon : CHILL BRO

he took a shower while blasting music, thinking on what his next plan was. he got out of the shower, black hair dripping water as he wrapped a towel around his waist. he looked in the mirror as he thought of a idea, he picked up his phone as some random rap song played, he took a picture shirtless. Sending it to Jake to confirm if it was cute or not.

sunghoon : *image attached*

Jake : wrong person

sunghoon : u fucking airhead is it cute or not

Jake : oh LMFAOOO

Jake : it's cute, who's it for

sunghoon : baefy yn

Jake : atp send her a dick pic

sunghoon : should i

Jake : yea if u wanna get blocked

as he turned his music off he heard you yelling for him from the living room. He quickly threw on his boxers and sweats, getting out as he put his phone in his pocket. "what's wrong?" He asked standing Infront of you, once again. Wearing baggy sweats but instead of them damn near falling off they are tied with the string. "do u not have any shirts or something, also the pizzas here" you handed him the money for the tip, he grabs it and walks to the door. "thanks" he smiled at the young woman handing him the pizza who was basically drooling. "can I get your number" she sheepishly asked. You looked at them in disgust, looking at the girl as sunghoon laughed and said no. He closed the door, walking back over to you, flopping on the couch and putting the pizza on the table. "why didn't you give her your number?" You asked, "wasn't interested" he shrugged, picking up a piece of pizza. Watching whatever you put on. "Lame."

Saturday 10:43 pm

he was hard. Extremely horny. to the point where he thought he might cum at barely sliding down his shorts. he thought back to the call he had with Jake yesterday, "jerk off loudly, yeah if I wanna be seen as a perv" he scoffed and slid down his shorts and boxers in one go. thinking if he should get off to a picture of you or just some random video on pornhub, he decided on a random video on pornhub. last thing he wants to be is a pervert (even tho he already jerks off to your pictures anyways..) he whined softly as he held his dick in his hand. fuck it. He loaded in on Instagram and stalked your account as his hand slid up and down his shaft. soft moans escaping his throat while looking through your highlights till he found his favorite picture, one of you and him at the beach. bathing suit top hugging your chest so well, making sunghoon's hand go faster on his already red cock, precum dribbling out his slit. His finger accidentally slipping and liking the year old photo. Shit. Shit shit shit. just as he was freaking out his load started shooting out, landing on his black shirt and blankets. his moan was loud, extremely loud. He only realized till after calming down from his high that 1. He sounded like a porn film and 2. He liked your story. He cleaned himself off with the shirt he was wearing, taking it off and throwing it in his laundry basket. Pulling his boxers and shorts up, grabbing another shirt from his drawer. just as he put his shirt on he heard his door swing open, "why you stalking me" you smirked at sunghoon, sitting on his chair in his room. "wasnt stalking you" he side eyed you as he continued to put on his shirt, looking down to notice a cum stain on his shorts cursing to himself, "I needa change my shorts. U gonna stay or what" he asked, looking at you. you turned around in the spin chair, he quickly took off his shorts and grabbed another pair. Putting them on and laying on his bed, "you can look now" he said, picking up his phone to see who texted him. "sunghoon" you called out to him, scooting closer to the bed until you gave up and laid on the bed next to him, "hm?" He replied. Sending a quick text to Jake and going on TikTok, "you should be quieter when you jerk off. not everyone wants to hear that when they wanna call their friend" you smiled at him teasingly as he looked at you before flicking your head with the same hand he used to jerk off with. You got up from his bed and left, sunghoon closed his door with his foot , sending another text to Jake. "Your dead meat."

Thursday 12:29 am

it's been 4 days since he started trying to seduce you, key word. Trying. everytime he jerked off you would just ignore it, same with him walking around in just sweats. he's at the point where he might as well walk around naked, he let our a frustrated sigh as he stood up from his bed. going to your room to get his charger that he lent you a few hours prior, maybe god was on his side or he was just lucky as hell. He opened the door to see you fucking yourself on a dildo. He feels like he could die from happiness right now, you were quick to slide the dildo out of you and cover yourself up. "Oh. My bad" he said, grabbing his charger from your side table. Your face was red, "sunghoon" you quietly called out. "what? ur not done with the charger?" He asked, looking at you covered by your purple sheets. You shook your head, "you wanna help?" you asked, uncovering your body.

Thursday 9:12am

he really has to stop dreaming of you. He woke up hard as shit, all because of that stupid dream. Like he would walk in on your masturbating? Yeah right. He sat up from his bed and groggily walked into the kitchen, he ignored you as he grabbed a water bottle and chugged it. You were quick to notice the very obvious bulge, swallowing your spit while you looked at his back. imagining how it would look after you scratched it during sex. Or how his hands would feel on your body, how his fingers would feel inside of you. Ok yn. Enough of these lewd thoughts. That's your friend your thinking of, your really hot friend. "u wanna make breakfast?" he said, his hot breath on your neck. you felt goosebumps, how did he get behind you so quick? the hell? "not hungry right now so no" you answered, not daring to turn around. "But I'm hungry" he mumbled resting his head on your shoulder. "Make your own food loser" you quickly spoke, moving quick to your room. he smirked to himself, he finally got to you. He's definitely gonna tell Jake about this.

Thursday 5:01 pm

"yn" you hummed as you focused on your show. "Are you a virgin" he asked, you nearly choke on your spit. "What kind of question is that?" You stare at him in shock. Sunghoon shrugged, not looking away from the tv. "Are you?" He asked again. "No sunghoon. I'm not a virgin. Are you?" You spoke with a small attitude in your voice, "nope" he replied, popping the p. "Are you lesbian?" He asked another question. "no. What the hell are these questions??" You shifted your whole body towards him. "So why don't you look my way." He finally looked at you, once again. Staring with a piercing gaze. "What do you mean by that" you know exactly what he means. "Why don't you show any interest in me" the fuck? You always show interest in him, why do you think you wear just shirts around the house? "I do" doesn't seem like it. "I like you yn." He finally expressed his feelings that were making him go insane. "me too" your voice was barley heard, "you like yourself too?" He smiled and chuckled softly. "No I like you too" you smiled back, feeling shy at the sudden confessions. "You know I love you" he said, scooting closer. Holding your face as he pressed a soft kiss on your lips, "I would hope so, why are you saying it so early though" you snickered, "cause I'm about to fuck you like I don't" his smile was so innocent you almost didn't register what he said, he's gonna fuck you like he doesn't? Hell yeah.

Thursday 5:30 pm

your not sure how you ended up in sunghoon's bed, laying on your back as he slurped up your juices. Spewing random shit as he ate you out, "been waiting like...months for this moment" his chin was glistening from eating you out. Sticking two fingers inside to bring you closer to your climax, and you were quick to hit it. Gripping onto his hand that was sliding in and out of you, helping you ride your high out. "that was good huh?" He smiled up at you. giving him a tired nod, he slipped his fingers out of you and sat up. Kissing your lips before sticking his fingers in your mouth to taste yourself, he was different from any other men you've slept with. No man would do this, besides sunghoon apparently. He took his fingers out of your mouth after you sucked them clean, praising you softly as he pulled his boxers down. Slapping his dick on your pussy, "you ready?" You nodded. He entered slowly, groaning out while you pulled him down to hold onto him. Clawing on his back, when he fully bottomed out you realized he was huge. Like 6 inches huge. Sliding back out just to thrust back in, he kept his quite fast pace while you rambled about something he wasn't paying attention to. only thing he was focused on was how good you felt around him, almost too good. "fuck, gonna cum soon if you keep clenching like that" he moaned out, kissing your cheek as he whined and moaned in your ear. "sunghoon" you sighed out, "yeah baby?" he answered. Lifting himself up, keeping his hands on your tits as you rambled about how good he felt. "I know love" he hummed back, sliding out. "doggy style baby" you were quick to get into the position and he was quick to slide right back in, you felt him deeper than you did just a few seconds ago. Arms already weak, making sunghoon hold you up. He was hitting places you didn't even know he could hit, "already fucked out?" He snickered, his hand snaking up to your neck to apply pressure. you immediately felt yourself let go and cum, "i-im cumming" you whined out, holding onto his arm. "I know" He replied, letting you go to fall onto the bed. fucking you harder than he already was, "gonna cum inside n ruin you for every other man" he grunted in your ear,trying to chase his own high. "fuck, taking it so well. who fucks you the best?" He moaned, "y-you" you were extremely sensitive, you felt another climax coming. it came too fast to even warn sunghoon, all he felt was tons of juice on his abs and hips. "Holy shit you just squirted" he spoke in pure shock, still fucking you as he praises you. you were a mess, tears were streaming down your cheeks as sunghoon finally came inside, "m' cumming pretty" he sighed out as he came, rocking his hips slowly. "you did so good for me baby" he slid out and kneeled down, he was quick to latch onto your pussy to clean you up. "w-wait sunghoon" you gasped out, "I'm almost done love" he reassured you, he was right. He had fully cleaned you up and laid down beside you, holding you softly. placing kisses on your face, both of you falling asleep

Friday 10:13 am

yeah. His back does look hot with a bunch of scratch marks. "does your back hurt?" You asked, embarrassed from how many there are. "nah, even if it did I think it would be worth it" he smiled as he poured coffee for you, kissing your forehead and placing a arm around your waist. maybe Jake was right, after all his advice did get sunghoon here.

[derrygirlstrash]

Skill issue.

I’d love to be allowed to be as flawed and clever and mad and wonderful and nuanced as a Moffat Woman. I’d love to reclaim my narrative against fate itself and find myself a happy ending even after death. I’d love to still be sexy when women are past the age of being allowed to be in media.

I’d love not having to be perfect to be a victim and be able to stick it to the people who made me one with their so-called “harmless” thoughts and actions. I’d love to be able to look a man who betrayed me in the face and tell him that he is the problem and his jokes aren’t harmless.

I’d love to find my fairytale. I’d love to be a sapphic given immortality to travel with my lover and I’d love to do all of this with insanely good banter and character moments.

This is a skill issue on your part, being a Moffat Woman would be fucking awesome.

If there’s one fictional thing I’d never want to be, it would be a Woman Written By Steven Moffat. I’m not sure what this guy’s deal is, but he has an awful habit of creating badass yet sexualised female characters and then killing them tragically before they can be properly developed, then having them mourned by a sopping wet cat of a man. Now, some of these characters are my absolute favourite parts of the show - Clara Oswald, River Song and Missy for example, and there are a few exceptions such as Bill Potts, but I just think it would be a terrifying fate. I mean, can you even imagine? You’re wandering around a very dodgy London/space location in a short skirt with a thousand witty quips on the tip of your tongue, being trailed by a skinny guy in an unusual outfit, then you get shot or something and it’s very sad and tragic. I would just hate it.

[achromatophoric]

Enid walks up to find the gang stifling laughter, except for Wednesday and Yoko, who are varying degrees of annoyed.

Enid: Hi babe! Hey everyone! What’d I miss?

Bianca: Oh, just another Addams special. Now sit. This you have got to see.

Yoko: *grumbles* 😠

Divina: Kay, let’s start over for Enid. Wednesday, what are “Twizzlers?”

Wednesday: *sighs* Those intolerably sweet mockeries of licorice.

Eugene: And who’s “the Riddler?”

Wednesday: The passably clever antagonist in that comedic film regarding a wealthy vigilante in black.

Kent: How about “whiz?”

Wednesday: *rolls eyes* An individual who is particularly talented at something.

Bianca: Right. Now, Wednesday, what does someone have if they are incredibly charming and capable of easily romancing a partner?

Wednesday: My answer is unchanged. Jizz. They have jizz.

Enid: 😦

Yoko: 😡

Divina: And— *stifles laughter* — And all the times Yoko said she’s “full of rizz?”

Wednesday: *scowls* I find no humor in this. An Addams would never judge another for their atypical dietary needs. Tanaka is free to gorge upon whatever bodily fluids she craves.

Enid: Ohmygawd!! *covers mouth*

Yoko: For the last time, I AM NOT FULL OF CUM!!!

Wednesday: Tanaka, calm yourself. You are amongst, loathe as I am to admit, friends. Are you perhaps hangry? Do you require more semen?

Yoko: No! FUCK!!! 🤬

Everyone else: 🤭🤣😂🤣🤓🤣🤣

[cutebat]

Hello it’s me again the one anon ranting about Alfred, and I just thought about this, HES STILL CHOOSING THEM!!!🤬🤬

Like, legit by not helping he’s choosing their feelings over ours!! He might’ve been there for us more than the batfam but, and fuck this is so brutal to think about, you just know that the reader grew up with this feeling in the pit of their stomach and a voice in the back of their head telling them that no matter how much Alfred claims to care and love you that he will always, and without fail, choose the people who hurt you the god. Damn. Most.☹️☹️

Like I legit would not be able to get over that?? I’d be so hurt, scared and betrayed that Alfred proved my insecurities right by choosing the batfams ashamed feelings over my destroyed sense of family!! Like to the point where if I were to somehow got amnesia and forgot them and everything they did, my soul would remember!!! And that makes it worse!!! At least back then you had one ally and now you have zero and that realization is just so OUCH 😡😡😡😡 and to make it worse?!! These morons have the gaul to say “isn’t this what you wanted?? We can be a family now!” 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬 Theres not enough languages to express how furious my soul would be!!! My soul would burn brighter than the fires of hell. I would become the sin of wrath itself. A chair WILL be going through a window!!

((I’m so sorry I have SO many emotions about this topic :T))

Don't worry, let your feelings out.

All I have to say is that the more that I read these kinds of fics, the more I realized that Alfred is just as bad as them.