#what sucks is my mom just got rid of my guitar that i got for my 9th birthday like 3 weeks ago and im so fucking torn up about it 😭

[putridpride]

this world is ridiculous. PS2 guitars for guitar hero are fucking expensive. I remember right before covid I bought a guitar from the local vintage game store for goddamn $15. Ppl are asking for fuckin $50 or more depending on the quality. get outta my face with this shit, are you kidding me 😭

[imsparky2002]

Ghouls and Monsters - The Vampire

(Draculeka is jamming on her guitar when she feels a dark ominous shadow looming over her, as she turns around, there is nothing there. She turns back to get her guitar, before Jubella appears in a flash. She raises her cape above her head and shows off her fangs in a grin.)

Jubella: I vant to suck your blood! Mwahahaha! (She hisses dramatically, as Draculeka remains unfazed.)

Draculeka: You do realize I'm a vampire, right?

(Of course Jubella knew, but she had hoped that her counterpart would’ve been too shy and scared, and would’ve screamed out of surprise. She decides to improvise.)

Jubella: Y-yes. But zhat just shows how eeevilll I am!

(Draculeka just exposes her neck calmly.)

Draculeka: Then do it.

(Jubella pouts and covers herself in her cloak.)

Jubella: You could at least pretend to be scared! Be a good sport!

Draculeka: I would, except you're me. So I know that you're not some bloodsucking villain. You're a mischevious goth kid who likes the creepy side of vampirism. Lemme guess, you drink blood packs?

Jubella: Animal blood, actually. Allows me to feel zhe joy of sinking my teeth into somezhing vhile not hurting anyone.

Draculeka: Fair enough. Ok, so, other me. What do you like to do?

(Jubella chuckles once more, showing off her gothic dress as she lets go of the cloak.)

Jubella: I love to give people a fright vhenever I can, as is natural for a creature of zhe night such as myself! I also protect zhe people of Paris alongside my dear sisters! As you said, I am scary, not evil!

(Draculeka can’t help but smile sadly. She envied this version of herself.)

Draculeka: Wow, you're lucky. In my world, monsters wouldn't dare frighten humans. We don't exactly get along. In fact, most humans are just itching for an excuse to get rid of us "freaks" once and for all.

Jubella: (Frowns) I-I’m so sorry. Believe me, humans aren’t alvays friendly to us either. Hunters and mobs have given us trouble, but I can’t imagine vhat it’s like to have to live in fear to such a massive degree.

Draculeka: Not your fault, you're from another universe. And like you said, I'm sure you have to deal with idiot hunters in your place. It's not all bad. I have my friends, Rose, my parents, Luka. 

(At the mention of "parents" and "Luka", Jubella freezes. She can't help but begin to tear up.)

Jubella: Could you…tell me about zem? Mine…died vhen I was young…

(Draculeka is not really able to process the fact that her family is gone in another universe. She hugs Jubella, and tries to give as comforting a response as she can.)

Draculeka: Oh... I'm sorry. U-um. Well, Mom and Dad can be embarassing, but they're really cool and protect me and Luka from any real danger. Luka teases me sometimes, but he's really sweet and good with a guitar.

Jubella: (Smiles weakly) That sounds lovely! I’m sorry for getting so emotional, it’s just…zhey vere killed by vampire hunters vhen I vas eight. All of our families died on zhat horrible day. 

Draculeka: I can’t begin to imagine what that’s like. All I can say is that I hope you and your siblings have somewhere to live, someone to watch over you.

Jubella: Vell, after zhat, the Vitches of Visdom raised me, along vith my sisters! Zhey had practically been our babysitters all our lives, so ve accepted zhem right avay.

Draculeka: Got any pictures? Of them, I should add. I already know about the whole "no reflection thing".

Jubella: (Smiles, and takes out her phone) Here zhey are.

Draculeka: Wow, it’s weird to see Mylene without vines! Or Alya with real flesh and Alix without sunglasses and moving hair! Speaking of which, do you and Alix get along well? You being a vampire and her a werewolf?

Jubella: (Giggles) Of course! Although ve rib on each other all zhe time! Vhy, ve hiss and howl at eachother, just for a laugh! 

Draculeka: Our werewolf is called Kim, and we do the same thing! (Looks back at the photo.) Oh! And there’s Rose! She’s got skin! And she’s green! Wait... is she your sister too? I hope you and the other Ghoul Squad aren't actually related.

Jubella: Oh, no! Ve just see each other as family. (Smiles) Ve vere all born days apart, and have been raised together since birth. I don’t know vhat I vould do vithout zhem.

Draculeka: My Rose's a real jewel. She's a skeleton, but a flower in my eyes. We jam out together, and she makes my heart scream. What about yours? 

(Jubella blushes and dramatically gushes about her darling Rose Frankenteen.)

Jubella: She’s a ray of light in my life, her brilliant mind and enormous heart make my spirit soar! She’s as ghoulish as she is sveet, and I couldn’t love her more if I tried!

Draculeka: Well I can see why she likes you. You know, I always had a love for Dracula, and it's cool to know my alternate self has such an elegant style. The dress and cloak match perfectly with the top hat. 

(She's a goth fashion nerd. Jubella chuckles and does a dramatic flourish with her cloak, swooping it around. She smiles as she sees Draculeka’s onyx bat clips and layered chain belt.)

Jubella: Vhy, thank you! And I have say, I adore your hair clips and that fabulous belt!

Draculeka: Yeah, I found myself going for more of a gothic lolita vibe. And you gotta show appreciation for bats.

(Jubella hums in agreement.)

Jubella: Ah yes. Children of zhe night. Vhat music zhey make.

(Draculeka squeals in delight. Jubella looks confused, unaware that she just made a reference.)

Jubella: Vhat did I say?

Draculeka: Do you guys not have Dracula in your universe?

(Jubella shakes her head.)

Draculeka: Pity. Well, anyway, I have an idea. How about we go for a flyby? It's the perfect weather for such an occassion.

Jubella: Sounds delightful! (Grins, showing off her fangs) Shall ve? (The two shift into their bat forms)

Draculeka: Loser has to watch all the Twilight films in one sitting.

Jubella: You monster!

Draculeka: Oh God! You have Twilight but not Dracula. Girl, I feel sorry for you.

Jubella: Vell, you won’t feel so sad vhen you’re forced to vatch zhem after I leave you in zhe dust!

Draculeka: We’ll see about that.

(They zoom off into the night.)

Here’s the third crossover, and my favorite so far. The difference between how these two present themselves is night and day, but I love them both so much, as Juleka’s one of my favorite characters. Thanks to Weeby for helping as always with the dialogue, and check out their Monstrous AU, it’s top tier stuff! As always, reply, reblog, post and ask. Oh, and send them questions about their Monster AU and their Class of Heroes AU as well. @artzychic27 @msweebyness 

[artzychic27]

… More SB&IB incorrect quotes?

Zoé: I didn’t wanna be mean! I was just jealous of you and Andre’s perfect relationship! Your perfect life, your perfect birthday!

Chloé: What do you mean “perfect”?! Your birthday’s gonna be in Greece!

Zoé: No it’s not! Audrey’s lying! I’m not even having one! We’re broke!

Chloé: You’re not broke! You had top of the line hair stylists fix that monstrosity!

Zoe’s: Not since her check bounced! I’m using ten gallons of hair spray, man! Because that woman wouldn’t let me come if I didn’t look better than you!

Science Kids: *Gasp*

Chloé: … Really?

Zoé: Yeah! And I thought if… If I attach that rocket to your back I could get rid of you. Then, that way I could take your place and live with Andre!

Denise: Whoa. That girl is on some serious ‘Single White Female’ type stuff. Uh, no offense, Aurore and Lacey.

Aurore: None taken.

Lacey: Yeah, I agree..

Zoé: Chloé, can you please find it in your heart to forgive me? And… if you can, you’d know that I’d never do anything to hurt you. Please… Cut your hair…

Chloé: …

…

Jean: I wouldn’t do it!

—

Sabrina: Alya… I don’t think I can do this.

Alya: Yes, you can! Because you are a woman now. And this is what women do! We suck up all the bullshit that the world dumps up on us and keep smiling through it all in our boxy-ass dresses!

Kim: Ame~en!

—

Adrien: Who cares? It’s all about that cutie, Luka. Did you see the way he was looking at me?

Kim: He was looking at me, Adrien. I was standing right behind you.

Nathaniel: And he looked right through you two ratchets, to me.

—

Marinette: Guess he’s not into girls.

Marc: That’s what’s up.

Marinette: Or you, Marc.

—

*Jean and Ismael show up wearing army uniforms*

Aurore: … Is it dress-up day, or what?

Jean: No! This is my-dad-is-afraid-of-me-growing-up-day!

Marc: Well, that explains you. But what about you, Austin?

Ismael: This is my-mom-got-a-hold-of-my-wardrobe-day. *Removes the uniform, revealing his normal clothes*

Jean: … How did you do that?!

Ismael: I don’t get ready, I stay ready.

—

Austin A: You don’t fit it anywhere.

Austin T: That’s fine. I don’t want to fit in.

Austin A: You know how I can tell when you’re lying? You look fat.

Austin T: God, you’re good.

—

Ivan: Just wanna let you know, I figured it out. I’m not gay.

Marc: Oh! You had a whole little journey didn’t you? Well guess what, cutie, no one is a hundred percent gay or straight, it’s a spectrum.

Ivan: Oh. Well, how gay are you?

Marc: Oh, I’m 20/20. Didn’t Luka give you the gay test?

Ivan: Luka?… You mean the hot guitar player?

Marc: Yeah! Luka is the fucking man! And he’s only a monster when he’s doing coke.

—

Alix: I don’t know what it is, but I do not like that woman.

Rando Lady: And it’s been a real simcha, right, Nath?

Nathaniel: She’s the worst. I hate how she “hucchs” her words.

Alix: She should shut the ‘fucch’ up.

—

Reshma: HE SAID WHAT?!

Ismael: Reshma. *Takes her by the shoulders* We are gonna reach up that jerk’s ass and rip out his heart! His ASS HEART!

—

Lacey: Shit! I don’t have any cash!

Jean: What? You don’t carry emergency cash in your bra or something?

Lacey: No! Who does that?

Jean: I know that’s where I’d keep my money if I wore bras.

—

Adrien: LUKA’S OUT OF TOWN!

Nino: Hey, it’s no big deal. We don’t need to see Luka in person. Let’s just use our imaginations. You remember what their legs look like, right? They’re like, like… Long rectangles.

[averys-happy-space]

club penguin rambles

there are a LOT of images bc the post is abt cp outfits. but also a ton of text bc i talk way too much. also I POSTED THIS ON THE WRONG ACC. I POSTED IT ON MY THEME TESTING BLOG BY ACCIDENT SO I HAD TO REPOST THIS. its the 11pm brain fog getting to me

okay so club penguin released a new clothing catalogue for november and here's my hippie fall outfit i came up with. it's designed around the sweater bc i thought the sweater was super cute but there wasn't any other hand item except guitar that really matched with the outfit. and like yes i could have it without the guitar (which i did do to take the 2nd pic) but i wanna equip a hand item!!! which sounds really stupid bc it is stupid but i'm picky and idc. the sweater IS adorable tho like look at it, its got little puffles on it and shit!!!! fucking adorable!!! and the colour is so pretty and nice too :3c i would buy that sweater if it existed irl. also look at the cool ass ghost puffle!!! their name is goober LMAO i dont rmb why i named them that. i think i was thinking like goofy goober but i already have an orange puffle named goofy ah so i guess thats why i just named this ghost puffle goober? genuinely i have no fucking clue. but i'm gonna keep them around cuz they look dope as fuck and also they match my penguins purple skin colour which i think is neat.

other outfits

since i am making a post abt cp outfits i also decided to add my previous outfits (that i have screenshots of) to this post too just to archive them so i can come back in 10 yrs and be like wow 16 yr old me had horrible fashion taste. (i hope tumblr is still around in 10 yrs. i mean, its lasted 15 yrs, so like whats another 10 right?)

for context:

the first one is one of my earliest outfits which i made with help & advice from moose bc i suck at fashion (thank u moose). i think it looks cool, tho there wasnt like a theme or anything that i was going for. i just liked the hair + jacket and wanted to make an outfit with it lol

the pizza one is from the pizza party event. do not ask me why they had a pizza party event. i have no idea. anyway it was really stupid but fun and i suck at the pizzatron 3000 minigame. i wanted to use a mouse for it but my mom took my mouse when she took my gaming pc so i had to use mac trackpad to play and boy it was Not good. also i gave my puffle jellybean a sombrero which i know is mexican and pizzas are from italy but i didnt know what else to give him!!! plus he looks really stupid cuz the sombrero is massive which i think is cute. oh yea, also i met rookie during the pizza party and i wanted to equip his background but my penguin covers half of rookies body and it didnt look good so i ended up going for this bg instead. its kinda lame but whatever, i still got to meet rookie and thats all that matters <3 (btw, for context, theres lots of npc mascots in the game and every so often they "come online" (its just a bot walking around really) and if u join the same area as them, u get a stamp + bg gift. i met rookie & jetpack guy during the pizza party and got their stamps and gifts but i love rookie more lol, hence why i wanted to use his bg. its too sad it didnt fit nicely bc i think its a p cool bg but oh well)

the bottom two are just variations of each other. basically for the sept or oct catalogue (i forgot which), the cp team added a bunch of punk stuff and i bought all of it bc it actually looked dope as hell. the one on the left came first but i didnt rlly vibe w the hair which is why i ended up changing it. also, the wings are a neck item which is why the first outfit doesn't have the dog tags even tho i wanted them. couldn't have both ): anyway, the second one came about after i got to meet cadence during the music party and i LOVE cadence (i had a massive crush on her when i was younger. like literally shes so pretty?!!) so i got rid of the raven wings so u can see her face in the bg. i can't lie i do think the bg is a bit lame bc its completely empty on the right which makes it feel kinda unbalanced, also u can see i have the cadence signature pin equipped. u can't change the positioning of the pin which sucks bc i would've put it on the right if i could but oh well. and yea i added the dog tags since no more wings. i accidentally clicked jellybean before taking this pic so it sent him home LMAOOO and i couldnt be bothered to get him back at the time so thats why hes missing from the pic. overall i think this outfit is def my favourite, the vibes are just so good. i love punk. oh and also the vampire teeth are bc the catalogue was mainly a halloween theme and well, they looked cool lol

for the record, jellybean is my favourite puffle hence why hes in all these pics. idk why but i just love white puffles, theyre so adorable and smiley despite being shy. also white puffles are slightly smaller than all other puffles which makes them 10x cuter. but i'm gonna keep goober around for a while just cuz they look cool as fuck. but i'll prob switch over back to jellybean when its closer to xmas. anyway its now 1120pm (i spent like half an hour writing this) so im going to sleep. goodnight

[iheartsunset]

Papa Louie Scarlett HCs

-Rosabella Ocampo is a 23 year old singer/songwriter and graduate school student who lives with her fiancé, Rudy, in a Powder Point condo. She is widely known by her legal/stage name, Scarlett Heart and is the lead singer/songwriter of Scarlett and the Shakers. While punk ska and playing gigs with her friends are her true passion, Scarlett plans to become a game theory professor in the future. She can mostly be seen writing lyrics for a new song, riding roller coasters with Rudy, climbing trees with Clover, and just vibing with Marty.

-Scarlett is rather bold and seductive, often playfully flirting with others or making jokes about inappropriate topics. I stole this from Rouge, thanks SnapCube fandub for revitalizing my love for Sonic. Alongside her flirtatiousness is her intelligence and desire to succeed, using rules and lessons that she learned from various games to apply to her daily life. Thanks to her love of poker and mahjong, Scarlett has grown to be very analytical and sly in her motives. Out of the shakers, she is undoubtedly the big sister friend as she’s kind of a bad influence on the rest of them and is always subjected to scoldings by mom friend, Janana.

-Rudy calls her “Princesa” because of her Cinderella-like backstory. Her mother was a very kind woman and Scarlett lived happily with her and her father. Her mother died in a roadside construction accident when Scarlett was only 9, leaving Scarlett heartbroken. Her father then married a woman named Moira with two sons, Graham and David, who was emotionally abusive towards Scarlett until she moved out at age 16. Scarlett’s relationship with her dad deteriorated over time and she’s basically disowned them since. She finds solace in Marty and Clover’s parents, who think of Rudy and Scarlett as their own. She also got along with the other Frostfield residents and helped Willow get back into hockey after her infamous car accident (the first one).

-Stan Twitter often makes memes of her because she’s so iconic and quotable. One of her most iconic moments was when she screamed “I wrote this next one about my bitch ass stepmom. Moira, if you’re listening, your hair is limp and you fucking suck!” at the VMAs.

-Music was her escape as a child, hence why she learned to sing and play multiple instruments. However, her stepmother made her play the violin in the school orchestra as opposed to being allowed in a punk rock band. Even though she was concertmaster and first chair, she hated life so badly. Scarlett can play the guitar, bass guitar, violin, cello, drums, the trumpet, the saxophone, the bassoon, the piano, the xylophone, the harp, the flute, the recorder, the French horn, the clarinet, i didn’t even list all of them and I’m tired already. When one of the other shakers has lead vocals on a song, she’ll take over playing their instrument.

-Scarlett met Rudy during their shared freshman year of high school. Hazelnut High’s orchestra department had its annual field trip to Powder Point (based off my actual orchestra field trip!). Scarlett decided to sneak away from her snobby classmates and teachers and have the time to herself. On one particularly large roller coaster, she sat next to a boy with a Mohawk who told her that since he was a Powder Point native, he could more than handle it. He then proceeded to cry the entire time while holding her hand. They realized how much they had in common and kept in contact even after her trip was over. Their relationship is super lovey dovey, yet chill at the same time. Couple goals, but not on the level of Prudence x Cooper x Taylor.

-The shakers got together during the 23rd season of Flipline’s Got Talent. After the shocking elimination of Taylor Morales in the quarterfinals, the remaining acts were merged together. Scarlett and Rudy and Marty and Clover were two sets of pairs merged together. They all got along beforehand and loved Scarlett’s songwriting, so they all wrote an original song together for the finals. Even though they were fan favorites and had lots of support from the audience, Bill and Boopsy’s amazing ventriloquy act was what won the show, with the upset Shakers coming in second place. Afterwards, they were approached by Janana who offered to become their agent, and all they’ve known since was success. Fun fact: Rudy wouldnt accept Clover and Marty into their act unless they beat him and Scarlett at poker. They did.

-The shakers each can speak multiple languages, with Scarlett being able to speak fluent English and Tagalog, Tagalog being her native language (Filipino gang!). She can also speak some Spanish, Japanese, Arabic, Hindi, and Gaelic because she hangs around the other Shakers and Janana so much.

-All of the food, drinks, clothes, and personal belongings Scarlett loves are various shades of red. Cherries, longanisa, red wine, and candied strawberries are her favorite. Her entire wardrobe? Red. Her LED lights? Red. It honestly scares Rudy how red everything is.

-Her voice would either be Jessica Sanchez from American Idol or Gwen Stefani from the No Doubt era. She also covers a lot of No Doubt songs during their concerts. Speaking of covers, the shakers like to sing classic rock songs as well as modern day hits. Scarlett has the vocal range to do Ariana and Mariah Carey justice.

-Her and Marty are best friends. They’re both on the same wavelength and will most likely have the same reaction to memes, like word for word the same reaction. They usually have to get Rudy and Clover out of trouble most days. I love their chaotic, yet chill energy, like the types that just sit and observe and quietly make funny comments to each other.

-She determines whether she likes you or not based off of how good you are at mahjong or poker. If you suck enough to let her win, she’ll love you forever but if you match her in ability, she’ll respect you but kinda fear you as well. If you refuse to play altogether, she hates you. She’s a game theory student, so playing any board game with her is grounds for disaster because she’ll use her weird psychology and tricks to win all the time. Ironically, she sucks at video games. Even though she loves games of chance, she’s hugely against casinos and betting, instead trading small trinkets like food or makeup.

-At the Cheeseria, she set up a poker table, a mahjong table, and a pool table for the entertainment. They unfortunately had to get rid of the Uno table because somebody (ahem, Jojo) got a little too heated over a match with Papa and Wally. And by “got a little too heated”, I mean that Jojo literally got in a fist fight with Papa and lost.

-All she watches are telenovelas. Don’t ask about The Office or Game of Thrones, all she knows is stuff like Rubi and Maria la del Barrio.

-She doesn’t like musical theater except for Phantom of the Opera. She has taken a few roles as Kim in Miss Saigon, but secretly regrets it because musical theater is so much harder than just a regular concert. She still respects theater actors, but will never again sit through Anything Goes.

-She is the only one of the workers who has managed to successfully punch Guy Mortadello. Koilee and Rudy came close, but Scarlett landed an especially hard punch to his nose. Next to being engaged and forming Scarlett and the Shakers, she says it’s the third happiest day of her life. Now, Guy Mortadello is extremely scared of Scarlett and will cry if he sees her or hears her song on the radio (which is all the time).

-She has a tattoo of a heart of her hand along with a crown. On three of her fingers are a yellow Diamond, green clover, and blue spade.

-Scarlett is absolutely gorgeous and badass, I always kept rewinding Papas Cheeseria just to see her and Rudy in the opening because I had crushes on them both. Anyways, stan Scarlett for good grades (it’s not working though I’m still failing two classes)

[thefivenights]

corpse, business man, and mother dearest?

i put it under a cut bc william is doing that blood tear thing again and i warn to read the tags because i dont just do those willy nilly and if i missed one please tell me so i can add it on!

Inspiration: I'm gonna be honest I have no idea

Micheal was a product of a drunken night between Jennifer and William and the direct cause to their marriage. Takes more after his mother in attitude and most of his looks.

While he had a somewhat better relationship with his father than William did with his own, he didn't have a healthy one. He craved any sort of attention or praise from his dad and soon resorted to bullying his siblings to get some form of attention. He never got any regardless and was told to 'try harder' and he'll be rewarded.

This bullying stopped after he shoved his brother into Fredbear's mouth and got suspended from school due to a nasty fight. This was partially due to being traumatized and also William allowing him to help out with his projects (aka Jen told him to and the couch wasn't comfortable)

He gained a talent for robotics and was even the one who made BonBon for Funtime Freddy

He had no idea until the events of Sister Location that the robots were made to kill, or that his sister was killed by Circus Baby. He genuinely thought that Elizabeth just ran away again.

Moved away from the house after his mom said William wasn't coming home again. Part of him was relieved.

Went to therapy and finally realized that his dad sucked and he can break this toxicity that seems to curse the guys in his family (well, most of them)

Got healthy male role models in the form of Henry and his Uncle and made some friends in the neighborhood

Curiousity kills the cat when he gets a message from an unknown number recommending a job at Circus Baby's Pizza World that featured some familiar faces (he was overjoyed at seeing bonbon again but not when funtime freddy was also involved)

When he took over the role of Mike Schmidt, it was less a new name and more of the actual Mike Schmidt needed to leave town for safety reasons and Micheal offered to just take his place at the pizzeria so he could focus on skedaddling (win-win)

Was unaware of Springtrap/Scraptrap being his dad until he spoke, and then Henry let Micheal have an extra taser because he refused to do his work without it handy (eventually it was agreed that Micheal would be allowed to have metal bat because he kept breaking his computer with the taser)

Grew close to Henry after the move and working with him made them closer, Micheal got a father figure and Henry got to care for someone again (to the point where they sat next to each other in the final moments)

Returned from the dead to assist other spirits with animatronic ties with the task of moving on, regardless of whether it was because of his father or not. Is assisted by his brother who took the form of Fredbear in what he finds to be the darkest joke Louis has ever made

Inspiration: I always think of the Clown from dbd but that's very loosely related but its a lot of the dbd killers tbh

Was always that kid who had animal skulls in his room, or knew just a little too much about medieval torture methods

Had a horrendous relationship with his father that was physically and mentally abusive

Was more or less raised by his older brother (who isn't that much older mind you) and his doormat of a mother, who he cared for dearly

Has only used a firearm once, and it was to finally rid the house of the monster that hurt everyone inside, he hasn't touched one since

Was forced to move to America by his mother after his brother convinced her that he killed her husband

Was favored by his mother over the elder sibling and was effectively free from punishment

Met Jennifer after she threw her stuffed rabbit his face with enough force that she made his nose bleed, she apologized but wasn't sincere ("He looked at me funny Ma!")

Was a little bit unnerving to be around but still managed to make a few friends when he was younger in the form of Henry, Jennifer, and a kid named Casey who went missing (and before anyone asks no he had no hand in this)

Was obsessed with robotics and made a promise with Henry to make robots when they got older

Learned how to play guitar so he could impress Jen, ended up embarrassing himself and also fell out of a tree. Surprisingly, she found this charming and asked him out (while also laughing)

Got wasted on his 21st birthday and take a wild guess what happened that night

Came up with the concept for Spring Bonnie thanks to Jen's stuffed rabbit and even helped make the springlock suit itself

When asked by Henry why he did what he did (aka murder) he just laughed in his face and started talking about freeing them from the monsters while also referring to himself as one. No one had any idea what he was talking about but managed to escape getting the police called on him. He had no reason other than he knew he could get away with it, figured he might as well play tragic villain to amp up the guilt

Probably should've gotten therapy after the move but never did

Genuinely cared for his children but had an obvious favorite in the form of Elizabeth (who wasn't even his)

Figured ignoring Micheal would keep him from patricide but just made things worse

Figured out quickly after a head count during that party with Circus Baby what happened to his daughter and made off with the animatronic as soon as possible, lying to his family that she ran away again but would turn up eventually

Has never laid a hand on his children but was unaware what total ignorance towards them would lead to

After the Fredbear incident he at least paid more attention to Micheal, if only to prevent the boy from shoving his daughter into another bear mouth

Is an excellent cook and good at drink mixing

Never really got along with his own brother but at least respected him for what he did (including the biggest cover he was ever given)

After Micheal made his intent to bash his dad's animatronic face in clear, he decided that Micheal was no longer a child and free to attack (he did get tased and also bashed with a bat a few times before being dragged to hell)

"I may kill children but at least I respect my son's pronouns"

Inspiration: an older friend of mine

Jennifer was always a rebellious child, and an oddity in her mother's eyes

On that note, the two never saw eye to eye on anything, and clashed daily

Resolved to never become like her mother and succeeded

Had a stuffed rabbit named monster truck that she liked to throw at people (namely the new british kid in the neighborhood who looked at her funny)

Was best friends with a kid named Casey Fitzgerald before they went missing

Chopped her hair off at the age of 15 and basically told her mother to suck on a lemon (but with more swearing)

Generally a delightful little child /j

Raised Micheal in a tiny apartment with her then boyfriend before they got the house they raised Louis and Elizabeth in

Saw the situation Elizabeth was in and pretty much just adopted her on the spot (there was some extra hurdles but they got their daughter in the end)

Was the one who actually raised the Afton children due to William being both busy and inattentive for various reasons

Wasn't perfect in raising her kids but was certainly better than her husband

Took dance lessons when she was younger and encouraged her children's creative behaviors

After Elizabeth "ran away" she found out about William's previous... activities and devised a plan to make sure he wouldn't hurt anyone ever again

She told him what she found but mentioned that she was just disappointed in how careless his plan was in terms of the four main animatronics having his face saved in their systems, meaning it wouldn't be long until the police were at their door

When he returned home from destroying Freddy, she insisted it was better to do it all in one night to prevent suspicion, however this almost gave her plan away when he mentioned it was stupidly lethal. She succeeded when he still went back stating that he was smarter than most people

When he never returned home she told Micheal to pack his things and anything else he wanted to take with him, they were moving to another state so they could have a fresh start. She waited til he was a bit older to explain why William never returned home

Encouraged Micheal to get therapy and tried her best to give him a balanced home life. This became easier when Will's brother decided to step in and help and the duo became good friends (what also helped was that he was a teacher at Micheal's new school)

Warned Micheal to be wary about the new job at the pizza world and when Micheal finally rid himself of Ennard she gave him a place to stay while he figured out what to do about his situation

Helped Henry and Micheal set up the fake pizzeria and even wrote up fake lawsuits and ads

Is still alive after all these years out of pure determination to outlive any form of her ex husband

[malefi-andromeda]

Long Winding Road Stay Strapped My Dude

By: Astoria Cathryn Andromeda

Alrighty, this is a long one boys. So I touched briefly on this in my Welcome to Literally Everything post. No worries I'll recap you, so you don't have to switch back and forth. I just diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder, and then ADHD when I was 18 years old, and even then I had to fight for it after countless hours of research. See, there seems to be a wee bit of misogyny in the neurodiverse diagnoses. When I say a wee bit, I mean that scientists used to think that only boy could be autistic or ADHD. They only studied autism in males. Fortunately, nowadays we know that girls can be autistic and/or ADHD, but we present the traits differently than boys, and a lot of our traits are played off due to gender roles in society. For example, being overly talkative in girls is called chatty, whereas boys who can't sit still are sent off for testing immediately. This also causes problems for the boys, because little Johnny gets put on Adderall at the ripe age of 6 years old, just because he can't sit still for 8 hours straight, which by the way should not be expected of any elementary school kid, By the time, he's 25 he's 1) completely dependent on amphetamines 2) his body will stop producing dopamine due to being on the medication for so long. Nicht Gut. Generally, boys who are on the spectrum get picked out earlier due to late speaking, or lack of social skills. This is the one thing that girls happen to do better than boys. Girls are good at masking, which is basically taking social traits, phrases, personalities, demeanor, and copying them. In public, they put on a mask and at home, they have a meltdown. Girls are still not picked up as being on the spectrum, because shyness is called being 'ladylike' and 'dainty', and having a meltdown is just because :( girls are oh-so emotional, boohoo. Anyways tons of women do not get diagnosed with autism until they are well into their adulthood, I actually can be considered lucky to have technically still been a teenager when we finally got all the pieces together.

Alright, let's start with I don't know me as a baby. I did not speak until I was 2 years old, and then it was immediately full sentences from then on. I didn't do the babbling thing, which I don't know how impactful that really is to the topic. I was a very shy little girl. I was teeny tiny, we didn't know I if I was going to make it to 5 feet tall until I had a big growth spurt in 7th grade. I am 5'2 now and definitely done growing in case you were wondering, so not that short anymore. I did not like talking to adults, especially strangers, especially men. I did not look anyone in the face, and I will always hide behind my parent's legs when they would try to introduce me to people. I am an only child, and I spent a lot of time entertaining myself. I always had seasonal affective disorder, where my grades would dip in the winter. My parents knew I had a timer, they had 45 minutes from the moment they stepped into a restaurant before I would start breaking down. If I got off schedule as a toddler in any form, it was a catastrophe. Or this is what my parents and family tell me. I didn't really notice. I did not like being out in public a lot, I was a very picky eater, and I was extremely hyper. I was a very eccentric child, I only had 1-2 close friends and they were always a very well-liked outgoing girl who I just followed around. Looking back, I don't know how we missed it. I was shy because I didn't understand how social interactions worked, I was anxious about it because I didn't understand, I had sensory overloads, routines, and a very bland diet with a safe food which was ketchup. I put that shit on literally everything, eas, apples, mac and cheese, pizza, all meat, anything something forced me to eat that I did not like. But because I could sit still in class, and because I could zone out and daydream all day through school and still make A's nobody ever flagged me for anything and how I was supposed to know that not everybody just copied other people, scripted things before they talked, and could never pay attention. My mom always required me to be in a sport, and I was a gymnast and a swimmer for a long time, two very high-intensity sports, to help lower my energy levels, and because my mom has mild depression and she knows that exercise does help. Skip to middle school, my mom tells me I'm being bullied at church. It's not that I wasn't observing my surroundings I knew I was being excluded, but I didn't understand vindictive behavior, I thought it was my fault. I had zero friends in 8th grade until I sat down next to a random acqutaince I had gone to school with since I was 4 and the same gymnastics place. Then we were immediately attached at the hip after that. She is my best friend due this day and definitely got me through high school. Led me through so many social situations without either of us knowing. I had a very close friendgroup in highschool, all of them were on the drumline which I met through my best friend, and my first boyfriend was my best friend's neighbor. I ended up playing bass guitar for my high school's indoor drumline, and it was the best experience ever. I love my friends, but I had really bad depression when I was 15-now:) jk It's better. I didn't really realize I was depressed, I just didn't want to go to school, or swim practice, or do anything so of course, my mom noticed, and then once it was pointed out to me it got worse. My severe anxiety spiraled with my depression. Senior year of high school, my boyfriend and I were like toxic star crossed lovers, hurting each other over and over again without meaning to. My friends and I were self harming, all my close friends gad some demon going on. I finally decided to try therapy again after the disaster of being forced to go when I was 15 and the lady told me I wasn't depressed because I had a boyfriend and good grades. It helped a bit, I was able to get my panic attacks under control. Then I went away to college and stayed dating my senior high school boyfriend, we were just up and down as always, but with slightly better communication. My freshman year of college I joined a fraternity, a research lab, and my first hs boyfriend/ex/best friend and I went to a Christian campus place. By second semester, I had a lot of people who knew me and talked to me, but I didn't have any close friends, and even less close friends who were girls. All my close friends who were girls were at another college. My parents were worried about me, so they made me rush a sorority, which I knew was never my scene, but my parents made me join and I found a few girls I liked. Soon I was going to 6 classes, fraternity chapter, research lab meetings, christain crash group meetings, soriorty pledge meetings all on every Tuesday. I was different person at each of these events and wore a different mask. I was having what I know now were autistic burnout meltdowns every single day on the phone in my crusty dorm's stairwell. It was not cute. His mental health had always been bad too. Finally I decide I need to try a psychatrist and go back to therapy, and then he broke up with me. Then I made my first close friend, a guy who was in 3 of classes, and I took him to my fraternity's formal, and then coronavirus happened.  Rona kinda saved my grades, and mental health by sending us home event though it did suck. I got on anti-anxiety meds and things went up, but I was still having what I thought were panic attacks, they were austistic meltdowns. My psychiatrist, he's kinda an asshole, he diagnosed me with Obessive Compulsive Personality Disorder. I'll insert definition here: (OCPD) is a personality disorder that's characterized by extreme perfectionism, order, and neatness. People with OCPD will also feel a severe need to impose their own standards on their outside environment.> Basically hr told me I had rules for everything like how everyone drives on the right side of the road, but nobodythinks about it andwhen I broke one of my rules I got depressed, and when wasn't perfect I got depressed, and when I made an A I was relieved not proud. The diagnosis seemed to fit really well, and my therapist and I started working finding my rules, and getting rid of the bad ones, and making the others less harsh. I had thought every once and in a while in my life when I was really upset, what if I'm on the spectrum, because I just felt so hopeless for social interactions and I didn't understand. I always felt like I was a very specific person, but after the ocpd I started thinking more and more, and I saw a tik tok of a girl with lae diagnosed autism basically describing me and ranting about the misogyny. I did more research and I decide, yea I'mm gonna bring it up to mypsychatrist well he's a dick, so he was like um you don't act like sheldon cooper from the Big Bang theory,and I was like wellI just I have always thought I might have adhd like be neureodiverse, and he was like your grade point average in hs was a 97.8%, you're not adhd. I immediately cried, because I can't handle when anyone says anything in a even a slightest stringent tone. I'm baby, I know lmao. It made me angry though because I felt like he just brushed away all of my struggles I had in my whole life. I spent hours researching and typed up a 47 page document on evidence for why I was on the spectrum, and had my parents help will some of checklists to make sure I was getting outside perspectives. I rally my parents to be my back up and next psychiatrist appointment we actually talk about it and he asked my parents questions about when I was young and such and finally he was okay you're on the spectrum. I felt so validated and like I could start being myself. I slowly got more and more confident, changed my style of clothing, and researched more about adhd pushed to be tested, and oh look at that I also have ADHD. So basically discourse: "I feel like as a child I coded a machine to do life for me so I didn’t get bothered except I didn’t know about the machine I thought i was the machine and now I’ve become self aware and I have to learn how to read the code and rewrite the code because it’s dysfunctional because I’m not functioning well as a human being. I was really shy as a child. I would turn beat red when people talked to me or looked at me so I think I started cookie cutting situations and using them over and over again because they worked until I accidentally hard wired these expansion rules and expectations for myself. I didn’t may attention is class ever I just day dreamed and if I got good grades i wouldn’t be bothered i could just stay in my head and if I did my sport well my parents didn’t bother me. I was never asked if I did my homework I just did it so I wouldn’t be asked and have to deal with that situation. I would cookie cutter situations in class that would draw the least attention to myself.

I feel like i don’t have friends I just fulfill the expectation like a side quest on video games" I wrote this down pre autism confirmation when i just thought I had ocpd. Now I don't directly identify with ocpd, but I definitely think I developed that personality disorder a bit from living with undiagnosed autism. I am linking below the very informative Tik Toks by the lovely Paige on autism in girls. The imposter syndrome one really hit home. I had had so many panic attacks about thinking I tricked people into being my friend, or thinking I was smart.

I highly suggest watching these short tik toks, you'll definitely learn something

https://vm.tiktok.com/wVvcYA/

https://vm.tiktok.com/wqRRUf/

https://vm.tiktok.com/wnqhvX/

https://vm.tiktok.com/wqeyYg/

https://vm.tiktok.com/wnoE7u/

https://vm.tiktok.com/Kas6gB/

https://vm.tiktok.com/owM9hs/

Imposter syndrome

I am also linking an article about Sheldon Cooper from Big Bang Theory and Autism that explains why my psychiatrist was wrong, and also I am a girl and the spectrum is called a spectrum because it's a fucking spectrum no two autistic people are exactly the same it's like a color wheel.

http://www.autismsupportnetwork.com/news/problem-sheldon-cooper-and-cute-autism-387783

Here is a fun comic about the spectrum and how to view it.

https://the-art-of-autism.com/understanding-the-spectrum-a-comic-strip-explanation/

I am still learning about myself, and how to be me, and how to be myself but without breaking bad social rules. It's quite humorous though because I'll learn something is related to autism and I'm like oh shit again, like still, like, we're still discovering things.

"Tu ne me manques pas"

Bis später,

Astoria.

[kingdomsaurushearts]

What’s your story behind all the things that you like? What I mean is how were you introduced to all the things you find enjoyment out of (video games, anime fanfics etc). How’d you find quote on quote “geek culture” or how did it find you?

The majority of what I enjoy was via introduction by my older sister, or a friend. (This includes music. Nova is always exposing me to new stuff and giving me culture) Or. The old fashioned way, TV. Lol I survived off morning cartoons and cereal. In short, sister, friends, cartoons, fanfics, and CONVENTIONS.

My older sister had played KH1 up to the Deep jungle and then she quit. It was maybe 2004 at the time. But I remembered it well enough, that when my friend showed me KH2 lent his copy that I’m like. Ah hell yeah, I kinda remember this? (KH2 was the first I played, never even saw anything after Deep Jungle until I played KH1 later. But honestly KH2 pretty much gives you a recap, CoM exempt so it was fine. Sora didnt remember, so.. we were on the same page. Lol)

Same thing with Zelda. My first exposure was Majora’s mask, watching my sister play. (She wouldn’t let me play.Older sibling complex.) My first game was Twilight Princess, love that game, it’s beautiful and amazing. Dont @ me lol

Miraculous Ladybug was on Netflix, and I had seen @philsterman01 ’s comic dubs so I was like, yeah, I can finally watch it. (It wasnt what i expected AT ALL, but I still frickin love that cornball of a show. It’s ridiculous and cute.)

Sailor Moon was a huge part of my life, and I still adore it, my First OC was based off that and Tokyo Mew Mew.

Toonami was a huge thing way back when. Yu Yu Hakusho, Cyborg 009, Dragonball/DBZ, a liiiiittle Naruto. There was Fox Kids with Digimon, Shaman King, Winx Club, KidsWB had Yugioh, Pokemon, Cardcaptors, etc. (Adult swim had Inuyasha, Cowboy Bebop, Samurai Champloo and Scry-ed)

A lot of what I enjoyed actually starts at the library. I would ride my bike to the library and check out the limit of Manga and DvDs, I’d read them all and return them the next week and do it all over again… the internet was still foreign to me. Lol

My library didn’t really carry the “POPULAR” manga series, I got stuff like Iron Wok Jan, Skip Beat!, CLAMP stuff (to this day I still don’t understand Clover), Maison Ikkoku, Angelic Layer, but they still had like Fruits Basket, Bleach, Death Note, Chrono Crusade, Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles, etc. Anime was Rurouni Kenshin, X (1999), Tenchi Universe, Ranma ½, Vampire Hunter D, a lot of arbitrary anime I can’t remember but they were weeeeird.

When I was 13 I got a GaiaOnline account, and a FFNet, where I actually met my best friend and current roommate. (We bonded over our love for Hiei.) Lots of new stuff was introduced there.

A coworker of my Mom’s from a past job lended me Trigun, Raxephon, Fullmetal Panic, Generator Gawl, Arc the Lad, Kiddy Grade, Noir.

My mental library is pretty small all things considered. And I’m definitely more of a Casual Geek. I enjoy things in passing.

I think Kingdom Hearts is the thing I’ve held onto the longest, besides Yu Yu Hakusho and Cardcaptor Sakura. But I definitely love it the most.

And Miraculous Ladybug is sticking with me pretty strongly atm too. (But we’ll see. It’s still young)

I missed out on an lot of stuff in high school because I decided to ignore anime and instead get obsessed with Japanese and Korean Pop stars, of which I still need to get rid of my posters 💦💦💦 (they’re just… sitting in the closet lmao) and I was like… a YouTube nut. (I was absorbed into stuff like NigaHiga, Smosh, Mystery Guitar Man, Tobuscus, SMPfilms, Chonny, Bubsbeauty, Shimmycocopuffs, Equals3, stuff like that. Also the time I drew the LEAST and my art stagnated BAD)

I’m still playing catch up, but I’m more interested in creating, working on my OCs, animation/storyboards. Etc. It’s hard to get myself into new stuff cause I know I’ll be sucked in. *stares at Fire Emblem from a safe distance*

It’s also only in the last year or so, (2?) That I’ve actively been a part of a fan community, so it’s still a territory I’m treading lightly. And I’ve kept it to just the KH and ML fandoms. (And maaaaybe the MLP fandom but you didn’t hear that from me. *sweats*)

Long answer is long.

But it’s interesting to think back. Because everything is so VASTLY different now.

[abigailmaitland]

Andi Mack 4B Plots

My 4A Plots

Trigger Warning for depression - nothing too dark, but it is a significant plot of this season.

Extra 4A plot to be nestled somewhere before the finale:

Halloween!

The GHC & Co. trying to decide whether they’re too old to go trick or treating. Intense debate with Cyrus, Andi, and Marty on one side, TJ, Buffy, and Jonah are on the other.

“How can you be too old for free candy?!” Cyrus exclaims.

“I’ve always hated dressing up,” Jonah rolled his eyes.

“Halloween is the best time to practice sewing!” Andi expresses.

“I hate sewing,” Buffy groans. “Besides, I’m trying to put my dentist out of business.” 

“It just seems like none of you want to have any fun.” Marty says.

“I’m on the high school basketball team. I have an image to keep.” TJ crosses his arms.

“Is the image a boring, funsucker? Because you’re nailing it,” Marty teases.

Eventually the opposing group crumbles underneath the pressure of their friends and free candy. Planning their route is also intense - Cyrus definitely has maps of Shadyside and a detailed house list of who gives the best candy with averages he’s kept throughout the years.  

The Crafty Crew joins them for trick & treating. 

Cyrus dresses up as Waldo. 

Andi makes a ‘cereal killer’ costume, including a cereal box skirt, blood, the whole shebang. Even Cyrus groans at the pun (but secretly high fives her). 

Buffy goes as Buffy the Vampire Slayer & Marty goes as Fred from Scooby Doo. Buffy says he was supposed to be Spike from BVS, Marty laughs and says he thought Buffy and Fred were a better match.

Jonah puts those fake vampire fangs in and some fake blood on his face. Buffy chases him around all night. TJ dresses up as a failed math test because it’s the scariest thing he can think of. 

Walker dresses as Miles Morales & Libby dresses as Hawkeye (we deserved a deaf hawkeye!) 

And finally, the episode ends with an intense candy trading session. Lots of smiles, laughs, and friendship/couple moments. Halloween episodes should always be the most lighthearted!

4B.

Episode One.

Bex is laying in bed. She’s awake, but she’s not doing anything but staring. Her phone goes off and it’s revealed to be 3pm. Andi’s calling. Bex hesitates, then answers. “Mom - are you okay? You were supposed to pick me up fifteen minutes ago.” 

Bex shuts her eyes, then opens them again. Suddenly, energy is in her voice. “Oh yeah - you know me, just running late. Traffic! I’ll be there soon, Andiman.” she hangs up quickly, she sighs. Her eyes are distant. She rushes to get ready, throwing on whatever she can, v messy, not caring how she looks.

Next scene Bowie is seen in a restaurant kitchen cooking. They ask him if he can stay late - he says no, he’s got to be at Red Rooster Records for the open mic night, revealing that he is working two jobs to try to start saving, referencing the potential for a second child (as Bex listed financial fears as a main reason).

We see Jonah’s apartment when he invites Cyrus over to hang out. Jonah says “it’s kind of small,” but Cyrus smiles and says “You know, it’s actually cozy. My house can be so...lonely.” Jonah kind of scoffs and rolls his eyes, muttering something about rich kid perspectives. He admits he had to get rid of a lot of stuff, including his old baseball gear and complains that he can’t play his guitar after a certain hour because his neighbors complain because the walls are basically paper thin. “Basically, don’t say anything you don’t want Dave to hear. He’s basically a member of the family at this point.”

Bex is off on the drive home with Andi. Andi’s talking non-stop about school events and how she failed the last project (revealed in the 4a finale) and how she needs to improve, but she feels so out of place in the school. Bex is saying “yeah” and “mhmmm”, barely listening. When they get home, instead of cooking, Bex orders pizza but doesn’t really eat much. Andi starts to get worried and asks if Bex is okay, but Bex just says she thinks she’s getting sick. Bowie comes home exhausted and both him and Bex fall asleep on the couch during a movie that they were supposed to watch as a family.

Cyrus is a little bothered by “the rich kid perspective” comment and tries to analyze how much his upbringing colors his opinions. The next day, he’s talking about it with Buffy and Andi at The Spoon and how he’s worried that he gives off entitled-rich kid vibes. They laugh and say sometimes he’s oblivious and dumb with money, but he’s not entitled. Andi complains about how tired Bowie always is now and then mentions how strange Bex was acting yesterday. Cyrus’s brain jumps to the worst possible conclusions. Buffy has to reassure Andi that everything is probably okay. As a distraction, she talks about how happy her parents are to be back together and shows off goofy pictures of them. She says her father hasn’t stopped talking about her mom in church since she’s gotten back. GHC smiles.

Episode Two.

Bex’s work has started to get a little sloppy and customers are leaving bad reviews. Celia presses into Bex, saying she didn’t invest so much money into this business just for Bex to get lazy. Bex sighs, shakes her head. “Reschedule my appointments for tomorrow, mom. I think I’m sick.” Celia’s eyes widen, as if she suddenly understands something. Bex goes home and slips back into bed. She doesn’t really go to sleep, but just scrolls her phone aimlessly.

Now that TJ is out at school, Cyrus asks him if he’s going to introduce him to his parents as his boyfriend. TJ awkwardly laughs and says “I should, shouldn’t I?” Cyrus nods. “But if it helps, we can have dinner as boyfriends with my parents first?” TJ’s eyes widen. “All of them? At once?!” Cyrus laughs. “No, we can do dinner at one house and dessert at the other?” TJ nods. “Uh, yeah okay.” Cyrus holds TJ’s hand. “Come on, Teej, you have nothing to worry about. They already love you.”

Jonah bumps into Amber in the hall and brings her to a quiet spot in the hallway. He grins and says he’s going to therapy. Amber asks him how it’s going and he shrugs, but doesn’t seem upset. He says “it sucks, but you know...it really does help. I really didn’t like it at first and didn’t talk, but he asked me to play some music the other week and that helped break the ice,” Jonah explained. Amber smiles and hugs him. “Congratulations, Jojo. I’m proud of you.” He asks how she’s doing. Amber says she’s getting there, but that she wished she was a freshman again because she’s struggling with her AP classes, driver’s ed, her job, and her family issues. He said it sounded like a lot, but that he’d try to be there for Amber because she was there for him. Amber nods and says she’ll keep that in mind. Suddenly, there’s a security guard telling them they have detention for skipping class.  At first, Jonah and Amber look at each other scared, then they crack up at the situation they’ve gotten themselves in.

Andi comes home and sees Bowie sitting with Bex in the bedroom. She overhears Bowie comforting her and then hears Bex saying “I don’t want Andi to know…” Andi freaks out, texting the GHC group chat saying something is wrong with her mom.

Episode Three.

Friendsgiving episode! GHC + Crafty Crew all get together at Andi’s apartment a week before Thanksgiving and have a huge feast. Cyrus put together a spreadsheet and organized who brought what. Buffy and Marty have a competition to make the best dessert. Jonah buys store-bought microwavable mashed potatoes. Andi decorates the entire space and Bowie makes the turkey. TJ brings the BEST Green Bean Casserole and everyone bothers him the entire episode to give up the recipe. They give each other updates; like the dinner with Cyrus’ parents went really well, Jonah and Amber talk about how their detention teacher hated them because they kept laughing, Buffy talks about her parents, etc. Everyone also shares traditions their family does for the holiday.

Walker says that his family covers the table with paper and everyone writes/doodles what they’re thankful for throughout the meal. They then hang it up until it’s time to decorate for Christmas. 

Libby says her family go on a long walk after dinner with each other.

TJ says his whole family plays football together before and after dinner.

Cyrus says he has several Thanksgivings and too many traditions to name - but his favorite is his mom’s side, who volunteers first and then have a small meal afterwards.

Buffy says after dinner they decorate for Christmas, which is her parent’s favorite holiday.

Jonah says they play a bunch of different board games and family games.

Amber says that her family doesn’t argue for the whole day - and also watches old home movies.

They ask Andi what traditions her family has. She seems upset and explains that they used to go to pop’s family and celebrate, but now they have to make new traditions without him because he left them. Everyone comforts her. Bowie overheard and tells Bex - they both want to give Andi the best Thanksgiving in the world. Bex tells Bowie that “all this family drama is why I don’t want Andi to know…” 

Episode Four.

Cece takes Andi out for a bonding day, saying that she’s been missing her. Andi says she misses her too. They go to an art museum and have lunch where Andi talks to Cece about not doing well in SAVA and maybe she’s not great at art like everyone thought. Cece tells Andi that when she was a toddler, she grabbed a pack of crayons and for weeks, she wouldn’t put them down. Cece would catch Andi awake at night DRAWING. Andi would fall asleep with a pack of crayons cuddled close to her. She’d color in the car, at restaurants, in the bathtub with bath crayons, everywhere she could. “And that first year you went to camp, I’ll never forget how excited you were about crafts...Andi, I don’t think you’re bad at art. I think you think you’re bad at art which is making you bad at art.”

Andi says “wow…” and knows that Cece is right. SAVA wouldn’t have chosen her otherwise. They go out to have Fro-yo and Cece asks how Andi is doing at home. Andi tells Cece that it’s been weird having Bowie working so much and then mentioned that Bex is acting strange too. She asked Cece if she knew anything about that and Cece nods. “Yes, but it’s your mother’s choice to tell you.” Andi complains that no one’s ever told her anything. 

Cece rolls her eyes and then says “Well I have important news. My dad is moving in with me.”

Andi asks “Wait, why? Is everything okay?”

“He’s okay, yes. He’s still healthy, especially for his age - but,” Cece pauses. “You know, he misses you and Bex. He’s been spending so much time with Mei and Ling and the twins and Ronald, he thought it’d be a nice surprise.” “Yeah, it has been awhile since we’ve seen him, but...he doesn’t need to move in with you. He could just visit, couldn’t he?”

“I asked him too.” “Why?”

“I thought it’d be good to have someone in the house. I know you, Cyrus, and Buffy still have sleepovers there, but it’s just been too empty for too long. I know how important Andi Shack is to you and how important the house is to your mom, so I decided to keep it.”

“Oh. Cece - I’m sorry. I guess I got caught up in my own stuff again…” Andi says, hugging Cece.

“It’s okay. You’re the child, remember?”

Cece drops Andi off. She calls Bex outside and they close the door. 

“Rebecca,” Cece says. Bex avoids her eyes and focuses on the ground, her nails pressing into her skin. You think it’s going to be a lecture, Bex thinks it’s going to be a lecture, but Cece pulls Bex into a hug. “Andi’s worried about you. You need to talk to her.”

Plot B of this episode is Buffy and Cyrus hanging out at Buffy’s house. We’re introduced to Buffy’s father (headcanon: he’s black. I know sofia is mixed, but I think it’d be cool to have men of color in the show). He wears a cross necklace and is clearly religious, but Cyrus never feels uncomfortable mentioning his boyfriend TJ. Buffy’s father treats Cyrus with nothing but love, honestly, and mentions that he’s the son they never had while eating dinner.

Episode Five.

Jonah reveals that he’s gotten a job as a cashier at The Red Rooster. He’s not immediately great at it, which causes a spike in his anxiety, but instead of having a panic attack he’s able to ground himself using techniques his therapist taught him.

Andi’s teacher, the one who was critical about her art, notices a huge change in Andi and her work and compliments her new project, stating that she knew Andi had it in her. Walker, Libby, and Andi all celebrate together at The Spoon.

Buffy & TJ hang out - they play basketball and get to know each other better. “I don’t think we’ve ever hung out without Cyrus,” TJ laughs. “Yeah...I don’t think so? This is nice,” They play H.O.R.S.E, as well as a game they made up where each basket they make, they get to ask a question. The harder the shot is, the harder the questions they can ask.

At home, Bex is pacing the bedroom. Bowie is sitting on the bed. Bex complains that she doesn’t know what she should do or how she should even talk about it. Bowie listens, nodding his head. “You know, when my father was sick, he didn’t want to tell me. He wanted to be strong and proud. And he almost didn’t tell me, but I found his medication. I was terrified because something bad could have happened any moment and it would’ve been a complete surprise to me.” he pauses. “Andi is worried about you and probably thinks something really bad is going to happen and I don’t think it’s fair to hide it. Besides...she’s starting to get to that age where maybe it’ll start to affect her…”

Episode Six. 

Christmas is coming up and the GHC + Crafty Crew go to the mall. They split up into their normal groups; TJ, Jonah, Marty + Walker and Cyrus, Andi, Buffy + Libby. They’re playing Secret Santa for each other so they’re trying to hide the gifts they’re buying and throwing each other off. Of course, they’re also buying gifts for their SOs. 

Secret Santa List -

TJ has to buy for Marty

Jonah has to buy for Buffy

Cyrus has to buy for Jonah

Marty has to buy for Andi

Andi has to buy for TJ

Buffy has to buy for Cyrus

TJ fretting about what Cyrus would want and if he should even do a Christmas gift because Cyrus doesn’t celebrate (he would celebrate non-religious aspects with Buffy & Andi some years)

Cyrus complaining that Christmas is so materialistic - but then also trying to find the best gift to give TJ and Jonah.

But while TJ, Jonah, Marty, and Walker are shopping trouble arises when they’re wandering around a store, picking up different things, putting them down and whatnot. At some point, Walker notices a security guard staring him down. He feels uncomfortable, but knows he didn’t do anything wrong and continues to just walk around the store with Jonah, Marty and TJ. But it all goes wrong when the group tries to leave the store. They’re all stopped by the security guard, but Walker is singled out. The guard says that he knows that somebody in this group stole and that he has his suspicions as to who. The group all look at each other and furiously shake their heads, saying none of them stole. The guard asks Walker to empty his pockets. Walker does, he has nothing in his pockets besides his wallet and house keys. The guard lets them all go with a warning. Walker is embarrassed and angry that no one else had to empty their pockets. The group buy him some food to try to cheer him up and all agree that it was really wrong.

Episode Seven.

Christmas/Hanukkah special.

They all celebrate their respective holidays. Cyrus invites TJ to celebrate Hanukkah the day after Christmas. TJ of course agrees. We see Cyrus’ family celebrate Hanukkah. Andi, Bex, Bowie, Cece, her dad AND Mei, Ling, her husband, Ronald, and the twins celebrate at Cece’s house. Mei and Cece start to argue, but their dad reigns them in. They finally call a truce after their entire lives of competition and decide their feud isn’t worth it. (“What were we even fighting with to begin with?”) Buffy goes to church and celebrates with her family. Marty celebrates with his family; it’s the first Christmas with his step-siblings. 

The gifts they all bought for each other are revealed when GHC + CO get together during Christmas afternoon. TJ gets Marty a joke gift (probably something about always forgetting him), Jonah buys Buffy a bag full of all of her favorite snacks/candy, Cyrus got Jonah an anchor necklace to keep him grounded and a guitar tuner, Marty buys Andi some weird gag gift like a yodelling pickle, Andi buys TJ a Troy Bolton basketball jersey, and Buffy buys Cyrus a mug that says ‘you’re so weird, i like you’ because she knows Cyrus loves mugs.

TJ and Cyrus psyched themselves out and ended up panicking and getting something neither of them really liked. They laugh about it and then realize they should get to know each other better.

Buffy and Marty treated it like a competition. Buffy got Marty a pace tracker that goes on his sneakers, a scrapbook for his future marathons, and those weird toe socks. Marty gave Buffy two of his hoodies, a necklace shaped like deer antlers which symbolizes strength and gentleness, and an NBA video game that they can play at his house. 

The episode is light-hearted and easy, but the whole episode Bex is still just a little off. Bowie and Cece are extra mindful of her. Andi is still really confused and worried. At the end of the episode, when they all get home, Bex sits on the couch and says “Andi...I have something to tell you.”

HIATUS.

Episode Eight.

Special opening similar to the gun-control episode, as well as the anxiety/panic attack opening talking about how mental health is important and if you or a friend are struggling, tell a trusted adult and take care of yourself.

“Andi...I have something to tell you.” Bex’s voice is serious. There’s a lot of tension. Andi seems worried. Bex seems nervous. Bowie has his hands on Bex’s shoulders comfortingly. 

“Mom? I’m scared...are you sick?”

“Yes,” Andi seems shocked and scared at this revelation. “But not the way you’re thinking, Andi...gosh, this would be easier if I was still just your cool, older sister.” because this is the kind of thing that ‘cool, edgy’ older siblings go through. Not parents. “Andi, I have depression. I’ve had it since I was about your age. It...doesn’t go away, but I’ve been on medication since my twenties and it worked great. But, with work stress and everything that happened with Pops, well...it stopped working. I should have been more open with you and everyone and gotten help when it started…”

Andi stops tensing. She sits with Bex on the couch. “Mom...I didn’t know…”

“Yeah, only Bowie and Cece did. I wanted to be the best mom in the world, especially after giving you up for so long. I wanted to do everything and be everything for you - I didn’t want you to have to worry about me or feel like you had to take care of me. I wanted to be strong.”

“Mom, I love you. You don’t need to pretend to be something you’re not or do more than you can.”

Bex hugs Andi. She’s definitely crying.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, Andiman. You don’t have to worry or take care of me ever, okay? I’m the adult. I’ve talked to Bowie and Cece. I’m going to get my medications adjusted and I’m going to go to therapy.”

Andi feels like a huge weight has been lifted off of her chest but it only lasts momentarily. She gets out of the hug.

“Mom, I learned about depression in school…” She pauses. “It can be genetic...what if I get it?”

“Then we’ll help you through it. No matter what.” Bex and Bowie wrap her in a hug again. “You talk to us, though, okay? Don’t hide it like I did.”

PLOT B. Buffy and Marty have a massive fight. This leaves TJ and Cyrus in awkward positions because TJ thinks that Marty is right and Cyrus always sides with Buffy. This leaves Jonah has a tie-breaker and he totally panics and exclaims that this is why he hates relationships. When they realize that he got really anxious choosing a side, they realize they were being stupid and shouldn’t have put anyone in the middle of the fight. They all apologize to him and make up.

Episode Nine.

Buffy’s birthday!

Similar to Bowie, Buffy has never liked huge birthday parties or attention on her birthday. Andi says “Buffy likes attention everyday...except her birthday.” Cyrus and Andi make sure to tell Marty the first of the month that under no circumstances should he try to surprise her. He asks Cyrus and Andi what they do for her birthday then. Cyrus says that they have a Buffy birthday tradition that they’ve been doing since the second grade.

They meet at Buffy’s house for a celebratory breakfast of Froot Loops and chocolate milk because Buffy went through a phase where that’s the only thing she would eat and drink for breakfast, then they walk to school no matter what the weather because on her birthday in second grade, she demanded to be able to walk alone because she was “all grown now” (her parents followed them, just further behind. If it’s a weekend, they walk to The Spoon). After school, they walk back to her house and they play Buffy’s favorite game at the time “Twister” (Cyrus’ least favorite game) and have a silent dance party (at the time, her mother had just come back from war and asked them to not make too much noise). Then, they eat “garbage pizza” because Buffy had just learned the name of it and thought it was hilarious, and her favorite cake. Then, Andi and Cyrus stayed up as late as possible watching whatever movies Buffy wanted to watch.

During lunch, while Cyrus, TJ, and Jonah are getting their lunch, Marty asks Buffy if he can join in on her birthday traditions. Buffy is pretty rigid and likes the traditions as is, but says that maybe they can create their own birthday tradition. Marty comes up with the idea of a three-legged race (Him and Buffy vs TJ and Jonah) and then going out for ice cream - that way, all of Buffy’s new friends and boyfriend can be included before she goes back home to celebrate with the GHC.

That goes just about as well as anyone would think. Hilarious montage, honestly. This is the silliest idea I’ve come up with and yet, I love it. 

Episode Ten.

After school, Jonah and Buffy decide to hang out. They go to a skatepark. Jonah is much better than Buffy - which he celebrates and exclaims “finally!” She’s determined to learn a pop-shove it.

While at work, Bex thanks Cece for supporting her during her depression and tells her that she got her medications adjusted and is starting to feel better. Cece nods and says “I’m really sorry for not supporting you when you were younger. I’m sorry I didn’t believe you.” Bex forgives her.

TJ and Cyrus experience some homophobia both in school and outside of school. Cyrus gets upset and insecure, TJ loses his cool. They sigh and realize that it’s probably something they’ll have to go through a lot - but at least they have each other to go through it with.

Andi, Bex, and Bowie go to Cece’s house to spend time with their grandfather/great-grandfather. During the visit, Bex and Andi brush up on their Mandarin, they play games like dominos, cards, and Mahjong, and they eat traditional Chinese food. 

Episode Eleven. 

Amber got her driver’s license. She surprises Andi & Buffy on a weekend for a road trip. They drive to the town nearing Shadyside and have all sorts of adventures. They take lots of pictures to always remember this momentous occasion.

Cyrus is sick which leaves Jonah, TJ, and Marty alone unsupervised. They decide to have an adventure of their own and have a giant game of “The Floor is Lava” in public. They get kicked out of multiple locations. They end the day by going to The Spoon and having an eating competition to see who could finish their burger, fries, and milkshakes first. Being that TJ and Marty are used to bulk eating, Jonah is definitely the one who gives up and almost throws up.

Episode Twelve.

Walker, Libby, and Andi are preparing for the end of the year project where they could potentially be accepted into the school’s gallery, which is an honor and a party. Andi knows that she can create something amazing - but doesn’t know what she wants to do yet. They’re all stuffed into Andi shack, bouncing ideas off of each other. Walker wants to do a self-portrait vs. how the world sees him, Libby wants to create a sign-language sculpture, Andi is conflicted and has no idea what she wants to create.

Buffy/Marty + Cyrus/TJ double date. Lots of hijinks. They also definitely go bowling and Cyrus tries to bowl without bumpers. At one point, TJ ran to the bathroom and told Cyrus to take his turn (it didn’t matter because he was so far ahead, there was no chance of Cyrus ruining his chances of winning) Cyrus rolls a strike and celebrates. He then tries endlessly to replicate it for his own turns to no avail.

While at work, Jonah is talking to Bowie about life. He says that therapy is going really well and he hasn’t had many panic attacks since. He thanks Bowie for being there for him in the beginning and Bowie says that it’s no problem at all and that he’s glad Jonah is getting professional help. Jonah says that he really looks up to Bowie and tells him that today was career day and that the high schoolers were prompted to think about what they want to do when they’re an adult. Jonah said he has been thinking about pursuing music and wants to join a band. Bowie smiles and tells Jonah that he reminds him a lot of him when he was Jonah’s age. He advises Jonah to join a band, but to do it for the music and not for fame, because when he’s older and traveling, he might regret not being home for big things. Jonah tells Bowie that if he doesn’t do music for the rest of his life, he doesn’t know what else he would do. Bowie shrugs and says “You might not know what you want to do now, you might not know what you want to do when you’re 23, or 45, or 55. Life isn’t a straight line, it’s full of twists and turns. Just follow your heart and listen to The Universe in those times and you’ll end up where you need to be.”

Episode Thirteen.

Andi has decided that her end of the year project will be focused on her family. She decides to create a literal family tree - she crafts a tree and each branch has a picture of each family member. Branches, like Pops and his family’s, are clearly snapped at the base to show that it’s a broken tree and he left. Bex’s branch has the picture of her as a teen after just giving birth to Andi, Bowie’s branch splits into two to show that he was absent for 13 years, but then heavily involved, etc. (IDK. I know nothing about art and couldn’t come up with anything else lol)

Bex starts to participate in her photography club again, has been doing better at work, and has become more involved in the PTA at SAVA again. Bowie asks her if she remembers what they were talking about earlier in the year. Bex says “Another baby?” Bowie nods. “Yeah...I’m ready now.” He grins and tackles her in a hug and lots of kisses.

TJ gets his first A in math class, on the final test to boot, after a lot of hard work, tutoring, and accomodations. Cyrus takes him out on a date to celebrate.

Buffy and Marty are in this episode at some point, probably not a big part tbh. Mostly because I’m losing steam lol.

Episode Fourteen.

Andi made it into the gallery. Her entire family, GHC+, and Crafty Crew turn up to the gallery to see it and they all go to the after party for her. Cece says “I told you you just needed to believe in yourself first…” Bex and Bowie tell Andi how proud of her they are and because they are literally awful at timing, tell her that they’re going to be trying for a baby. Andi has very mixed feelings about this, but Walker interrupts and drags her out to dance and party with everyone.

The night ends with Cyrus, Buffy, and Andi having a sleepover. Lots of hugs, celebrations, and love. They definitely squish Andi when she’s sitting between them on the couch while watching movies.

At the end of the episode, Andi texts Jonah about how mixed she feels about having a sibling. Jonah says he can understand - she feels like she might be being replaced, that he felt that way a couple times. Andi asks, like when? Jonah admits that he felt that way when he saw Walker and Andi at the Bar Mitzvah and that was his first panic attack. Andi said that she had no idea he was having panic attacks that long, Jonah says “well now you know. Sorry for not telling you.” Jonah tells her that he’ll always be there to listen to her if she needs it.

[mystblbk]

Chavela Valdes--Chapter 2

Panchito shows up to our place—room, in the Milagro's house. Anyway, he shows up and makes me feel uncomfortable as he tries not to flirt with my mother in front of me. Not liking the way our live-in bruja is looking at the exchange, I sneak out the front door and back onto the street. As I’m turning back to the park, I pull out my hidden savings from the handful of babysitting jobs I had during the past year while looking out for anyone that might mug me.

“Let’s see,” I quietly tell myself while counting the money in my hand, “I think this should be enough for a guitar, not a top shelf one but a good one at least.”

I walk into the park again, satisfied with the amount I have, and decide to find out where the closest pawn shop is. My first attempt is to find Luis and ask him but after reaching the fountain I see that he has already left. I sigh and shrug. Deciding on looking for the first bus headed for the closest mall, I walk the other half of the path to the group of buses stationed across the street. The sun is bright, even now in the first days of February, and remind me of the Texas sun on my skin. I smile as I watch a monarch butterfly flutter about trying to find it’s flock. My eyes follow it until a familiar figure catches my eye.

The girl from before.

The girl, dressed in a white top and vest with jeans as bottoms, is sitting slumped over on a forest green bench. I stop and watch her, not sure what to do, when she pulls out a flask from her bag and proceeds to drink from it.

Isn’t that illegal? It sure as hell is in Texas!

I tilt my head and keep watching. The girl takes another sip, then another, then finally drowns the rest down like her answer is the bottom of the silver bottle.

That’s not good. Maybe…

My feet carry me to her like a string pulling forward and then stops right in front of the bench she is sitting on. I look down at her then as casually as I can—but like not really because now that I can see her up close my heart is beating so fast and like why is that even happening—sit next to her. I wait a few seconds to see what she does before speaking up.

“Are you okay,” I ask as softly as I can—but also as good in my crapy Spanish as I can because for some reason this girl’s opinion of me is important, “Need anything?”

The girl glances at me then looks away and gets rid of the tears collecting in her eyes. She sighs and huffs before speaking up without looking at me.

“To be alone, I need to be alone,” her voices starts strong but by the second half of her response I can hear sadness take over her tone.

“Oh, sorry. It’s just, I saw you before. You were fighting with your boyfriend, and well,” I pause then look over her one last time and sigh in defeat, “But, yeah you’re right.”

I stand up and pull my bag by the straps, walking back in the directions of the closest bus.

“Wait. Sorry.”

Did she just speak English?

Surprised, confused and a bit relieved I turn around and wait for her to continue.

“I think—I think I’m fine. Thank you,” she sighs as she looks up at me for the first time, “Thank you for asking.”

I frown and watch as she looks down to the ground again. Tears form thicker in her bright blue eyes, making them look even more shiny and bright. I sigh and walk the few steps back to the bench and sit down.

I turn to her, “Well then, what’s wrong?”

She shakes her head and covers her mouth with her left hand. She sighs again and lets out a humorless laugh, putting both hands on her knees.

“It’s just, I don’t understand dudes,” her voices turns sad to exasperated in one breath, “Like, I don’t know, I think men are from another planet, really. It sucks!”

Well I can’t help with that but, I know what usually makes mom feel better.

“Your clothes are really pretty,” I tell her, saying it in a nonchalant way.

One.

Two.

Th—

The girl looks up and stares at me for a second, connecting our eyes together with the stare. Her eyes look confused but surprised. Gone is the sadness and annoyance that were swirling in their depths earlier. I give her a small smile.

“Thanks,” she whispers as she and I continue to lock gazes.

She breaks the stare and looks over me. A shiver rolls down my back, probably from having a rich girl look at my lack of expansive clothes, and I try to hide my discomfort at being stared at by blue eyes.

Before she can say anything, I speak up with a scoff, “No, don’t even look at me. I just got hear and I don’t have cash to buy anything yet.”

The girl gives me a small smile and lets out a giggle.

“Well I think you look,” like you ran away from a group of hitmen in the middle of hurricane season, “Like you have a lot of style.”

What?

“Anyway, money is too overvalued really,” she finishes with a huff.

Her demeanor is back to the sad and upset mood it was before. She’s bent over her knees, biting her nail and staring off into space.

I stare at her, trying to gauge what my options are then I answer her, “You don’t care about cash?”

She shakes her head with a ‘No’ and bites her nail, looking away from me again.

I dig deep in myself and speak in Chino’s voice, “Well then give me everything you have.”

The girl snaps her head to look at me, ocean blue eyes filled with fear and surprise. Her shiny puppy eyes look so lost that I can’t help laughing my serious face away. Her expression changes to shock then understanding. By the time I have my chuckles in control, she’s laughing a watery laugh but a joyous one.

“Hey, it’s a joke. Calm down! No, no. Don’t cry,” she’s shaking with relief so I can’t help but pull her to me in a hug as I continue to calm her down, “No, it was just a joke.”

She’s laughing harder now and pulls away from me. I watch, happy that I got her into a better mood than before, as she laughs freely and pushes me softly in a joking manner. She slowly settles down and smiles at me.

“Valentina,” she tells me giving me her hand to shake.

I shake the soft hand with a smile, “Juliana.”

We share another laugh then settle down. It seems Valentina accepts my presences as she turns a bit towards me and sighs.

“Yeah, well,” Valentina’s mood changes back and I frown, “Lucho, my boyfriend, is really upset with me because I’m not giving his big ego attention. But like, really, I’m more interested in my own situation right now. Like, my dad died a few days ago and…”

“Yeah, I can imagine,” I speak up to giving her time to think, “It's something that needs time to understand and accept. Not to mention, I imagine, that it happened suddenly...”

“Yeah,” she sigs, “Suddenly…”

I watch her than for some reason take her right hand from her lap and hold it between mine. I try to soothe her with my touch, an action I have never performed for anyone besides my mother, watching as she slowly allows my soft caress to soothe her. My companion looks up again at me and smiles as a thank you. I pull her up by her hand and walk with her to a man who is selling drinks.

“What do you want,” I ask her.

“No, I’m fine—”

“I insist,” I cut her off trying to get her to sober up, “You probably have a bad taste in your mouth and I’m thirsty too. So?”

She smiles and points to the white sugary drink in a large barrel-shaped container. I grin and order two coconut flavored drinks before we start walking down the long path again. We sip our drinks for a while then Valentina speaks up.

“It’s just, I feel lonely right now. I feel depressed and…lost,” she tells me as we walk, “My dad was my direction, my confidant. He wasn’t perfect, obviously, but what time I did have with him he would be there for any problem I had. I just don’t know what to do anymore. And on top of that my siblings fighting with our stepmother just makes it worse. I wish we could all just move on and try to keep the peace; you know?”

“Well, that’s normal,” I reassure her, “I suppose it’s a good thing you feel something, instead of being a soulless monster. Right? And well, I’m sure your family is just feeling the tension of everything falling on them now. Things will work out, it’s a bit too early to just force them to calm down. And about your boyfriend, he’s just being an idiot boy. If he really cares about you he’ll snap out of it and see that he’s not helping the situation. I think you should let yourself feel and process and let them too. I’m sure you won’t feel depressed forever and things will work out.”

She smiles for some reason, “So you’re telling me that you believe in ‘happily ever after’ when this is all through?”

I blink feeling a bit stumped and try to understand what she means, “Well, yes. Sort of, I mean—realistically yeah. Like everyone else I suppose.”

“Well, right now I don’t think it applies here. Like everyone is just annoying me right now,” she huffs.

“Oh, well I guess I’ll just leave you then,” I joke and walk a little away from her as if to leave

Val laughs and pulls me by my arm, “No, no! Not you. Actually, you…you actually get on my good side.”

I laugh loudly at her cheeky grin, “Oh well that’s good!”

“Yeah, cool. No, but I mean, lately I feel like people aren’t real. You know,” she sighs but keeps turning to look at me.

I nod, remembering my mother, “Yeah, really. That I do agree with.”

“Totally, they prefer you lie to their faces instead of telling them the truth. My friends are all mad at me too, I’m too depressing for them right now. Come on,” she shakes her head with another huff of exasperation.

“No, well,” I sigh, “That’s totally inconsiderate on your friends’ part.”

Just as she’s about to say something we reach the food vendors stationed near the edge of the park. I look up, entranced by both the traditional Mexican food and street food being prepared. I glance back over to my new friend and we lock gazes. Val stares at me for a second then we both catch the tail end of a child begging his dad for a burger at one of the stalls. Valentina laughs and I furrow my eyebrows.

“What,” I ask her as I glance over to the burger stand.

“It’s just I just saw,” she giggle, “Do you want a burger?”

“What,” I gasp, “No, no”

She laughs again, “You started to, like, drool.”

I shake my head but a giggle escapes, “No, no. I didn’t.”

Valentina smirks and takes my hand, dragging me with her to the food, “No its fine, me too. Let’s go get one.”

Even though I’m trying to tell her no, I let her pull me to the stall. The girl still doesn’t listen, just gives me puppy smiles at me while ordering two burgers. I shake my head during the few minutes we wait for our food, completely thrown off by this girl’s kindness. We continue talking about little things to pass the time and before long we’re sitting down on one of the small tables to eat.

I take a bite and hum my approval of the food. Val laughs and I look up at her with confusion.

Valentina’s eyes shine brighter than before, “Its good right?”

I try to hold back a blush as I respond, “It’s delicious.”

The girl smirks then point to her cheek, “Right? You have—"

This time I do blush as I try to take off whatever she’s pointing at while she giggles, “There?’

“Yes, right there,” the girl nods with a smile then turns to place the dirty dish with the others, “I’m full.”

I watch Valentina deal with paying. She’s smiling kindly and taking with the young man at the stand when her whole body turns ridged. She’s staring into her bag, frozen, then suddenly snaps back and takes out a few bills and hands them to the young man.

“Everything okay,” I ask with worry as she looks shaken like before in the bench.

“Yes, um. I just remembered that I have to go,” she hastily stands up, almost pushing the table to me.

I try to come up with a reason for her change of mood and only come up with, “I can pay for my—”

She stops and looks up at me in the eyes “No, what? No, it’s okay. I’ll see you later.”

And with that she leans over and kisses my cheek, leaving me plenty confused, and runs off into the crowd. My eyes follow her until she mixes with the people leaving the church service across the street.

“Okay,” I mumble to myself in English, “See you soon.”

Not one to leave food on my plate, I quickly finish my meal and thank the workers.

I wonder what that was all about? Maybe she saw something that made her upset? I hope she feels better. She’s certainly a better daughter then I am though.

My thoughts stay thinking about the girl. I could tell she came from a well-off family by the way she dressed but something was off about her. It wasn’t her situation, which to be honest was all kinds of messed up. I mean, who could act to cold to their girlfriend when she’s going through something so sad. I may never have had a boyfriend but even I know it is messed up to act the way he did to Valentina earlier. And what’s even worse, he’s ganging up on her with their mutual friends.

Yeah, her situation is messed up but there was just something else that throws me off.

“I wonder what,” I whisper.

“Juli?”

I look up and see that I’m outside my place. Panchito and my mother are standing in front of me, obviously leaving and waiting for me to answer.

“Uh, yes,” I switch back to Spanish.

“Do you need something? I’m taking your mom to the store to buy some food,” he explains.

I glance at mom then turn back to her friend, “Yeah. I need to go buy a guitar, cheap obviously.”

“A guitar,” my mom asks, “For what? And where did you get enough money to buy one?”

“Money from babysitting for Cielo, mom. I got a job, playing in a band, so I need one,” I tell her, “I get paid for the events I work but it's good enough. I’m going to meet the leader later today.”

“Well, sure,” Panchito answers, “I’m sure there’s a pawn shop in the shopping mall.”

Mom looks at him then back at me, “Well, when you go meet him, I’m coming with you. Understand?”

I nod, “Yeah, sure.”

With I sigh, I let it go and let Panchito lead us to his car. The trip to the local shopping mall is mostly quiet except for whenever mom and Panchito would see a shop or spot they had once hanged out at, then they would laugh and remember their youth. Once we get to the shopping mall, Panchito leads me to the local pawn shop. The moment I step into the store I see a beautiful caramel colored guitar. I stare at it, my mind turning to the shade of the ends of Valentina’s ha—

What the hell?

Where did that come from?

I huff and walk to the counter, ignoring the way my mom and her friend watch me from the entrance.

“Hi, good afternoon,” I greet the owner, “That guitar, can I see it?”

The older man turns around and—

“Don Luis,” I smile, “What a coincidence.”

The old man smiles, “Hello Juliana, what a coincidence. Let’s see, this one, right?”

He turns around and points to the guitar. I hum in agreement and he pulls it down from the hook it’s hanging from. Before I take it, I make a signal for my mom to come inside. As I take the guitar, my mom and Panchito come to stand next to me.

“This is my mom, Lupe,” I introduce, “Mama, this is Don Luis. His son is the leader of the group I was telling you about.”

My mom shakes hands with the man, obviously confused but happy that he’s a gentleman and not some creep. They talk for a moment and I just ignore what they’re saying. I pluck the strings and inspect the inside for any cracks on the wood.

“You have a good eye, mija,” Luis tells me as I look back up at him, “I’ll give it to you for fifty dollars.”

“Fifty,” I ask, my eyes on the price behind him, “The price says a hundred.”

“No, mija,” he chuckles, “I’ll give it to you for that amount. I’m sure you’ll bring enough business for my son, so I think I won’t be missing those extra dollars.”

“No don’t want to inconvenience you,” I mumble, “I have the money…”

“Well then use it to buy you some more clothes, girl” Luis smiles, “You’re going to have a group of brothers dragging you everywhere now.”

I blink, “Okay, well thank you.”

I pull out the fifty dollars and hand them to Luis. The man pauses for a minute then turns around and calls out, “Mijo, I have someone I want you to meet.”

A moment passes by then a young man, no older than thirty, comes out from the hidden door from the behind the counter. His hair is slick back and very much in style. His jaw is squared which matches his tall and broad body. His look is complete with a soft tan on his skin that matches his dark brown eyes. Overall, he’s attractive looking.

“Si, papá,” the young man asks.

“This is the girl I was talking to you about,” Luis smiles and points to me with his chin, “Juliana.”

The young man smiles and walks up to me, eyes looking me over then nods once. He pulls out his hand for me to shake and I take it.

“I’m Salvador, it’s a pleasure,” he greets me, “My dad said you play amazingly and well we really need another guitarist. Do you know how to play racheras and ballads?”

“Um, yes I do,” I nod, “I might need some practice to get them right but learn pretty quick.”

Salvador nods, “Okay, well play something for me? If you do good, we can start tomorrow morning.”

I nod and put the strap of my new guitar over my shoulder, making sure it’s in the right place and distance from me. Once I’m ready to go I start strumming a song, the hardest song that I could remember learning. I seem to be doing good as I look over at Salvador and Luis, they both nod along with the music and glance over at each other. I try to ignore my mother’s gaping and continue on. As I reach the end all four adults clap.

“Good,” Salvador smiles, “You’re hired.”

I grin, “Thanks. I won’t let you down.”

“I believe you,” he laughs, “Well, we play at my uncle’s restaurant during the week and sometimes on the weekends if we don’t have an event to play at. Is that okay?”

“Sure,” I reassure him, “It’s not a problem. What do I have to wear? I don’t have much cash so..”

Salvador laughs, “Alberto left his suits with me. I think they might fit if you get them adjusted. You’re a bit shorter and obviously slimmer. Unless you want a skirt then—"

“No,” I scoff, “Pants are better.”

“Okay,” he says, “I’ll send you the address and we’ll see you there at around 9’oclock? I’ll bring the outfits so you can try them on. My aunt can help you tailor them if—"

“I think I can do it,” I cut him off, “I know how to sew a little, so I got it.”

Salvador raises his eyebrow impressed but nods, “Okay, well then we’re all set.”

I smile and shake his hand again and also Luis’. I start walking out of the shop, my mom and Panchito following after me, when Luis calls me back to him.

“You forgot the case and some extra stuff I have for it,” he laughs as I walk back to the counter.

I blush and watch as he fetches the guitar case and a small velvet bag.

“Here is a full set of strings if you need to replace them. A silencer, or muffler, however, you call it. And lastly, a tuning key so you won’t hurt your hand tuning it,” he says handing me the items.

I nod and put my guitar in the hard case, making sure the velvet bag is tied tight to the side.

“Thank you both. I’ll see you tomorrow.” I tell them and hang the strap over my shoulder.

With a wave, I make my way back out the store and following Panchito and my mom to the grocery store.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18497122/chapters/44032504#workskin

[earthenfay]

Spilling the tea.

So this is the story. It sucks and I want to heal, no matter how long it takes me to talk about it. This is honestly brief, even if it seems like it is not. But there is a year of shit to consider.

Jamie was off work for a few months, in between contracts. We were already having problems living at my MIL's, with everything. Jamie was hanging out with his brother. Doing whatever. But the stuff started going. OUR stuff. PJ was pawning it, and we were broke. I was trying to preserve any funds and told him we don't need to get rid of anything as long as we are smart with our spending.

The stuff kept going. Mostly secretly. My guitar, my xbox, along with all of his stuff worth anything. It was heartbreaking to feel no control over these things. He was spending more time up at night and out wherever. We were fighting more, and I turned to his mom for someone on my side. This made things worse. Money and things were disappearing and he was often angry, sometimes like a flick of a switch.

That was January through to Mayish. He started working again with a new contract in his company. Things weren't amazing but they were okay.

*We got that red car in March by the way, my Grandparents gave it to us and offered it for a fraction of the cost of what they could sell it for. I was so grateful and this was right before things got bad.*

August, Jamie was home a bit. I was still wary and cranky about the shit year we had been going through with the fighting and the issues with my/our stuff disappearing to the pawn shop and never seeing any money.

August 4th Jamie had a bonfire, I drove to get him munchies because he had been drinking. When I got back, I was tired and it was 10:30. River was already in bed and I went up to join him. Fell asleep. Woken up at 3am by Jamie's cousin.

"Jamie is in jail." Was the first thing he said.

Not true, he was in the back of a police car. He crashed the car. On the phone he apologized and I was livid.

After that is a world of frustration. He didn't seem sorry and got mad at me every time I brought it up or cried over it. He only got charged with reckless driving, thank god. But it took two months of the police holding our vehicle, $2000 in impound fees, $520 in rental fees, and a world of guilt and defeat in the wake of his shitty decision. I just felt helpless, like it couldn't get worse. My jobs and school and River's childcare depends on me having a vehicle. I was stressed to the max.

Edit: The vehicle ended up being totaled, so the guilt came from my Grandparents doing a wonderful thing for us and feeling like this was such a slap in the face to them. It was also heartbreaking because we had that car for a few months and I loved it dearly, like detailed cleaning every two weeks or so lol.

We moved, he was at work so I did it with MIL's help and set up the house. Things seemed good again. But Jamie still randomly snaps at me, his bank account is often empty, and I just feel disconnected in general. Hurt.

Out of the blue he said he's moving out and I got really scared because shouldn't I be the one who is hurt and done? But I'm not. I love him.

So that was a huge thing. He has said this before and says a lot of things (then everything is normal in the morning), but this seemed serious. I couldn't focus, didn't know how to feel. Started panicking about all the things that are in my name that I could not afford if he left. Panicking about everything.

Last night he got a $600 speeding ticket. Who knows how many demerit points this is adding up to with the accident. I am at a loss. I don't understand why these things are happening. Why I have to fight so hard to keep us a normal, happy family. Why is he so back and forth? Not to mention it is immensely difficult to run my business, my photography, school, and my job properly with these things happening.

I can only be strong for so long. I'm exhausted.

Side note: Things seem normal again. It's been two days since he declared I'm the worst person and he can't put up with my "shit" anymore (???). I guess I'm not the worst anymore as of today. 😓

[call-me-rei]

Chapter 27

“I don’t believe in sad news but you’re making me see it.”

---

Have you ever been in limbo? In the in-between? If you’re lucky then the answer’s no. But if you’ve got my shit luck then you know what I’m talking about, unfortunately.

You don’t know where you are or why you’re there. You don’t even know if you’ll make it out of wherever it is you’re in. All you know is that you’re not alive. I was certain about that part.

Minutes are days and hours are weeks. There’s no use in trying to figure out how long you’ve been gone because no one is there to tell you. You might as well just wait for the bright light to take you to the end, whenever that may be.

Where was my end? Where would I go after I left this place? I didn’t know if I had been he best person, the most “godly,” but I was pretty sure I didn’t deserve to go to Hell. Right? I didn’t know. All I knew for sure was that I was dead. Rick killed me. He may have killed my mom.

I went through so many questions to determine why I was in this position. Yes, Rick came to the house drunk, but why attack? Why kill us? Was he that mad? Did he hate us that much? They say alcohol brings out your true self so maybe he did.

Why did Mom have to get involved with him in the first place? From the moment I met him I could tell something was off, but I never wanted to stand in the way of my mother’s happiness so I kept my mouth shut. That was a fucking terrible idea. Look where it got us.

My thoughts kept up on this path for a bit. First I was curious why I’d been put in this position, then I was angry, then disappointed. Eventually I accepted that I wasn’t going back to the land of the living. It was probably better that way.

My most recent thoughts went to Vic and how he’d probably go to my house on Monday when I wouldn’t be at school and find my lifeless body on my kitchen floor. I didn’t know if he’d be too upset or not. We’d been dating for a week and it was over before it started. Sucks, I really thought I’d like him.

In the vast nothingness I was in, I started to see the faces of my friends and loved ones. I saw Lynn and her smile when we were telling each other secrets, Sav and her eye roll of sass, my mom and her warm presence. I’m not sure if these images were meant to be comforting and depressing. I went with the latter.

I saw Vic’s face. His warm brown eyes as they looked into mine, the look of concentration when he was playing his guitar when we worked on our music appreciation project, and his cocky grin when he teased me. My heart sank. I’d miss that grin.

At one point I saw my life replay. I saw Mom and I sharing a hug after I’d come out, I saw my mom and Rick getting married, and I saw the different moves to the different cities because of Rick’s job. I saw my first days at the various schools I went to, the first day at Mission Bay weighing heavy in my memory.

Meeting Lynn, meeting Vic...it was all so intense. I was bullied and frightened. Who knew that that day would lead me here: dating my bully and now on my death bed? I definitely didn’t see it coming.

As my memories flashed by and started fading, I started wishing I could go back. I wanted another chance to go through life. I was only seventeen; I had so much more life to live. I prayed to God that He’d spare me this time.

But then the darkness started taking over and I knew my prayer was in vain. It was too late. I was too injured and there was no way I could come back. I couldn’t fight it, not that I was trying to. I felt myself relax into the black nothingness before I let it consume me.

***

I saw Vic again. I saw his outline in my sight. I didn’t know you could dream in death, but I saw him in my dream. I didn’t see his face but I know it was him. If this was a higher power’s way of fucking with me, they won.

Then all of a sudden I smelt Vic. The smell of his cologne invaded my nostrils. He never wore a lot of it, just enough for you to acknowledge his presence. I always found come comfort in his scent.

The smell was getting stronger; my heart was breaking further. Why would God toy with me like this? This wasn’t fair or just, and they always said God was fair and just. This couldn’t be God. Was it Satan? It had to be Satan.

Vic’s outline started getting clearer. He looked like an angel, his silhouette against a bright white light. This was it; he was here to take me to Heaven. Peace washed over me and I stepped closer to him and the light. If I was able to go with Vic I’d go, no questions asked. I mentally kicked myself a little wondering when I got so attached to him.

That didn’t matter. I continued to walk toward him and the light around him. His face got clearer the closer I got. A comforting warmth filled my chest when I finally got to him. He smiled warmly at me and stretched his hand out to take mine. I put my hand in his and followed him into the light.

***

“Kells?”

The warm feeling in my chest got warmer when I heard the voice say my name. His voice.

“Kellin?”

I started at angel Vic and smiled. I held his hand tighter.

“Kellin are you with me?”

I wanted to tell him yes, but I couldn’t speak. I opened my mouth but nothing came out. I squeezed his hand tighter still.

“Kellin, please. Just let me know you’re there.”

Could he not feel me squeeze? Could he not see me in front of him? I waved my free hand in front of his face. He seemed to look right through me. Why couldn’t he see or feel me? I was right there!

Maybe I needed to keep walking to the light. Maybe once we were both celestial beings we could communicate. I needed to pass the threshold.

I pulled Vic along and we continued walking. I still heard his voice though. He was still calling to me. I’m almost there, I thought. We’ll talk soon.

***

Passing the threshold wasn’t what I thought it would be. For one, the light got brighter, if that was even possible. No, it was, and I was shielding my eyes from it.

I thought I’d see dead relatives or something, but no, there was nothing. No clouds, no pearly gates or harp music, and definitely not people. Vic was gone. Both of my hands were free now. I pouted and looked around me, but there was nothing but white and blinding light. I could still hear his voice though.

“Come back, Kells,” he said.

I’m trying! Where did you go?

I walked because really, what else could I do? I had no idea where I was going but I knew I needed to find my way back to angel Vic. My warmth was almost gone; I didn’t want to know how I’d feel if it all went away. I followed the sound of his voice which continued to get louder.

I’m close. Please, hold on.

His voice continued to get louder. Soon his voice was as clear as day. In all my excitement I ran toward the sound. I was going to see him again and I’d finally be at peace. Hopefully I wouldn’t be trapped in nothingness again.

I slowed my pace when I noticed the sudden change. Vic’s voice was soon replaced with beeps. Beeps that went on a steady beat. What was that? Where did they come from? How could I get rid of them? Where was Vic? I worried that I was going to be trapped in the white field forever. Still, I kept going because fuck that.

Beep...beep...beep...

The sound stayed steady. Muffled voices started speaking, but I still couldn’t hear Vic’s. Did I go the wrong way?

Beep...beep...beep...

No, those beeps were still there. They would lead me where I needed to go I hoped. I continued to follow the sound and the intelligible voices until I finally heard his again.

“Thank you,” was all he said.

I stopped in my tracks when I saw his face again. It was different from before. He looked tired. His hair was unkept and he had bags under his eyes. Why did he look like that? What happened?

He looked so sad and defeated. Who would do this to him? Why would they make him go through this? He looked like he hadn’t slept in days.

I saw him sigh and hold my hand in his. The warm feeling from before was back, but warmer this time, as if Vic was here with me in limbo. I felt his thumb run across the back of my hand. I smiled at the gesture.

Then I heard him take a deep, shaky breath. I looked at his face and saw tears falling. I’d never seen Vic cry before. Hell, I wasn’t entirely sure he was capable of crying, but here he was, full on sobbing. But why? Who would do this to him?

I watched and listened to him cry. I saw his body shake as he struggled to take in air. I saw his hair fall over his eyes as he lowered his head. I just stood there, unable to help or comfort him. That broke my heart even more.

Talk to me, I pleaded. Tell me what I can do! I want to help.

More tears. He hadn’t heard me.

Please! I don’t wanna see you like this.

He was still crying.

Vic...

His tears started slowing.

Are you listening? Can you hear me?

He wiped his eyes.

I squeezed his hand. Vic.

He looked at me. Not through me but at me.

Can you see me now too? Am I where you are now?

He sniffed.

Vic. I squeezed his hand again. I felt the softness of his skin against mine.

At some point the bright white nothingness began to fade away. The lights were still bright, but there were more sounds and more colors. I could hear actual people. I could still hear Vic’s sniffles.

I squeezed his hand again to comfort him. This time I didn’t let up. I wanted him to know I was there. I’m here. I’m still here.

He raised his head and looked at me with tears still in his eyes. Oh, it was so sad to see. I wanted to wipe the tears away more than anything, but I couldn’t. My heart broke at the sight once again. If only he could hear me. If only he could see me and feel me and know I was fucking there!

I was a mixture of sadness and frustration, and I wasn’t sure which emotion I should have went with.

I sighed, feeling weighed down by everything I was feeling. It was too much for me at that moment. I laid down on my back and stared above me. I began to close my eyes, seeing Vic face staring down at me.

Vic...

“Kellin!”

[classic-rock-roller]

1. Kevin gets really sick one day, sick enough he struggles even just to move. QR has a show later that night, and there is no replacement singer, so Kevin asks if you’ll fill in for him. What do you do?

“Are you sure? I sound nothing like you. I don’t know how good it will sound.” “You’ll do fine. I trust you.” While it sounded different it wasn’t necessarily bad so it was ok for the one night.    

2. You and Crue are out and on a whim, you all decide to get new tattoos. The kicker is, the boys have all done this before, and they assume you have too, but you haven’t and, truth be told, you’re more than a little nervous. What do you do?

They can tell I’m nervous because I’m trying to rationalize getting one and talking a mile a minute. Nikki would ask if I’m ok and I would tell him this was my first tattoo. The boys would then calm me down and say I don’t have to get one if I don’t want to but I will anyway because I want one. 

3. You’re out bowling with QR, and Kevin is beating everyone. He steps up to take his turn and says, “Watch this, I’m going to get a strike” He exhales then steps up, and when he steps forward to throw, he slips, falls, and the ball just ends up rolling slowly down the gutter. The boys can barely contain their laughter, and Kevin is still on the floor, looking confused. How do you respond?

I go over to him and go, “Hey, Kev, are you ok?” “Yeah, I think I just hurt my back.” I’d help him up and if a little bit later it still hurt I’d take him to the hospital. 

4. You’re sitting in on a QR rehearsal shortly after Randy had left to join Ozzy on tour. They’ve got a new guitarist, and he’s struggling. After he botches the same bit of song for the fourth time, Drew pipes up from the back, “Hey, Greg, d’you mind sucking less?” How do the boys respond and what do you do?

Kevin and Rudy would agree with Drew. I wouldn’t say anything at first because he needs to get more practice. 

5. (Cont’d from 4) Greg tries again at the same spot he’s been struggling with. This time, he nails the first part, but butchers the second. Drew seems satisfied, but Kevin says, “Dude you didn’t suck less, you just sucked different.” How do you and the boys respond?

I’d look at the three of them and go, “Hey, cut Greg some slack. He’s really nervous. And the remarks are just going to make it worse.” They look at him and then apologize for making him so nervous.  

6. You’re having lunch with Crue, and Vince accidentally takes a sip from your drink. “Hey, Vince, that’s mine,” you say. With a deadpan expression, he looks at you and picks up your drink, pours it into his cup, pours the mixture into your cup, downs it all in two chugs, slams the cup on the table and says, “Oops.” How do you respond?

“Well, I hope it was good.” I’d flag down the server and then go, “Excuse me, Can I have another drink, please? The man without manners over there finished mine.”  

7. In your business class, you’ve always admired your classmate, Kevin, from afar. He wears some strange stuff, but this is college, so no one really cares. One day, he’s late, and he runs in without a shirt on. The only open seat is next to you, and he taps you on the shoulder and says, “Hey, sorry I’m late, d’you mind if I sit here?” How do you respond?

“Sure...that’s ok.” I’d blush like crazy and keep sneaking looks over at him. Hoping he wouldn’t notice. He probably would and get this huge ass smirk on his face.   

8. You’re in a store with Crue looking for the fitting rooms. Once you finally find them, there’s no clerk to let you in. You’re a little angry since you’ve all got to make the show in an hour. After you wait for the clerk for fifteen minutes, Tommy says, “Fuck this shit, I’m not waiting anymore.” and crawls under the dressing room door to unlock it from the inside. How do you respond?

“Thank you, Tommy. I was just about to do that.” I’d walk in after he opened the door.

9. Kevin and the boys have been running themselves ragged with rehearsals lately, even though the next show isn’t for a month. They want everything perfect. After 2 weeks, Kevin comes home looking sick. You ask him what he thinks he has (to determine how serious the illness is), and he just says, “Oh, it’s just Band AIDS. It’ll pass.” You have no idea what this means. What do you do?

“What the fuck is Band AIDS?” “It just means that I am getting really tired and need to take a break.”  I’d glare at him, “Well, guess who’s not doing anything with the band at all tomorrow.” He’s about to pout when he gets a smirk, “We could do other stuff.” “Nope, you are going to rest all day tomorrow.” 

10. You and Crue are eating pizza after a long day of moving. You’ve all finished except Nikki, who’s got half a piece left and is getting full. He asks the group, “Should I save this for later or just get rid of it now?��� Tommy shouts, “NO RAGERTS, EAT IT!” so Nikki shrugs and eats it. Later, when everyone is fixing to go home, Nikki is lying on the couch in pain. “No ragerts!” Tommy says again, to which Nikki replies, “Many, many ragerts.” How do you respond?

“Aww, Nikki, I hope you feel better. Here, let me go get you the tums.” 

11. You all received news a few days ago that Randy was killed in a plane crash. You, Kevin and Co, and Randy’s girlfriend had all been together pretty much since, trying to realize the magnitude of what happened. Randy’s girlfriend has been surprisingly strong throughout the whole endeavor. You get back from the store with Kevin the day before the funeral, and Rudy’s got her in his lap, and she’s lost her grip on reality. He looks at the two of you and mouths silently, “Help me.” What do the 2 of you do?

“Aww, Sweetheart,” I’d take over for Rudy and just sit with her on the couch as she sobbed into me. Kevin would sit next to me and not really know how to comfort her so we’d just sit there in silence for as long as she needed.  

--------------------

1) You, Kevin, and Randy are on an airplane. Randy is in the middle and Kevin is in the window seat. All of a sudden Kevin looks over to you and screams, “Look, lady, I don’t care how much you want it. I’m not having sex with you in the bathroom!” How do you and Randy respond? 

2) You’re helping your mom move some stuff. Randy and Kevin are out in the garage moving some heavy doors. You hear a crash, a bang, glass breaking, and an “Aw, shit.” You run out to see Kevin standing there dumbstruck and Randy laying on the floor knocked out. “The...uh...door fell and hit him on the head,” Kevin says. What do you do? 

3) Randy’s been driving you crazy all morning with practicing guitar. You finally have had enough and once he gets up to do something you put the guitar away. How does he respond when he gets back? 

4) You’re home from work for the day and Randy is out. You’re listening to Crüe and get really into it. At one point you’re standing on the kitchen table singing your heart out to Ten Seconds to Love when you notice Randy. What does he say? 

5) Kevin had been staying over at your and Randy’s house for the night and in the early morning, you come out of your bedroom without doing anything to your hair. Both Randy and Kevin are sitting at the kitchen table. Kevin says as he brings his coffee cup to his lips, “Jeez, do you always act and look like a zombie in the morning?” How do you and Randy react? 

6) You and Randy are in the car and Van Halen comes on. Absentmindedly, you say to Randy, “You know Eddie Van Halen is almost as good as you.” How does Randy respond? 

7) You’re spending the day at the beach with Crüe. Tommy and Nikki convince you to go on the old haunted house on the boardwalk. While in the haunted house, it gets stuck. The three of you are sitting there when all of a sudden one of the props just starts fritzing out. How do the three of you respond? 

8) You are at a wax museum with Kevin and Randy. You get to the Rock section and the two of them stand by their figures. They don’t dare move. When you ask them what they’re doing they go, “Shhh, we want to scare people.” You sigh and take a seat on a bench a few feet away. As people are coming through you hear someone say, “Why are there two each of those wax figures?” What do you do? 

9) While at an amusement park with Crüe, Vince, Tommy, and Nikki run off to do stuff and Mick stays with you. After about an hour you hear over the speaker system, “Would a Miss @osbournebemydaddy please come pick up her ‘children’.” What did the three of them do and how do you and Mick react?

10) You and Randy are having a tickle fight and he pins you down. He continues to tickle you and you keep screaming stop. He stops for a second but only to say, “What will you do to get me to stop?” How do you respond?

11) You and Randy are sitting on the couch when you smile at something in the book you’re reading. He looks over at you and says,  “There it is again.” You look up at him, “What?” “You better not smile for anyone else like that. If you do, I might have to kill them.” How do you respond?

@osbournebemydaddy , your turn, love. :)

[superjennysunshine]

Sky Captains Log - 1/8/2021: What I wouldn't give.

https://open.spotify.com/track/3LsGauNTi31HJSynV45ez6?si=hiSMS3l8Q7-GySHfNa5Lgg

I’ve decided to start making my various entries into tumblr a little series. unfortunately this one is sad but I’m sure I got something positive up my sleeve eventually. But expect alot of sad cause honestly Sky Captains Log is just a fancy name for Journal and I’ve only ever written sad shit in journals.

So the items I ordered online came in recently and it was amazing. My new ocean light thing makes my room look amazing and I can’t wait to see what it’s like when it’s dark, my hair brush helped get my knots out and made my hair flair out and get all bouncy! and my trimmer finally got rid of my sideburns. It probably sounds really mundane but it did a lot to help today. It made me feel really happy.

But of course i had to go and ruin it. I’ve been listenting to the above song a lot today. Singing it while i’ve been roaming around the house and grinding in FFXII, and a rogue thought hit me. I should learn to play this on guitar. But before I could commit to that idea I thought about my guitar teacher again.

He doesn’t call me anymore. I can’t blame him either. I completely ghosted him in october of 2019 how could i expect him to call all that time? But I can’t shake the horrible feeling I get when I think about it.

I failed him, and it sucks. He had so many expectations and hopes and was so ready to help see me through to the bitter ends of musical knowledge and ability and I let it all go down the drain.

7 years of potential, of a built relationship of memories that I have utterly condemned to the annals of history to rot away forever with the near galaxies worth of other failures I’ve stored away over time.

I don’t blame myself for not taking his first call, or the one after that, or even the one after that one. I had just come out to my mom, I was not having a great time in my life and my entire existence had taken a huge turn and I couldn’t find the strength to do it all another time. I was afraid of rejection, embarrassment, and feigned acceptance. So I didn’t pick up the phone, and around November of 2020 he stopped trying to call me.

I don’t have the strength to call him. I just don’t have it.

Honestly I feel like I don’t have the strength to be myself in the real world either.

For me, being a girl is much easier done behind a screen. Behind a silhouette of anonymity. I feel like the people around me think I’m one more than I do sometimes and that’s a terrible feeling. It’s the feeling that single handily ruined today for me, and it’s a feeling that has ruined and will ruin a lot more.

I used to be okay with how I was. I would just tell myself that life is random and It’s not worth blaming chance for giving me the wrong body but goddamn it just isn’t enough anymore. It’s sad, and it hurts. The things I wouldn’t do to just have been born the way I wanted, what I wouldn’t give to not have to see someone that isn’t me in the mirror. What I wouldn’t give to not have to come out to people as trans.

What I wouldn’t give to not have destroyed 7 years of growth over my own fucking identity. 

[chrisv73-blog]

Secrets - Part 2

Word Count: 3300

Warnings: NSWF (Smut)

Writer notes: Its not perfect and I've been messing with this too long so I'm ready to start Part 3. I just need to post it at this point. It's kind of all over the place....hope u like. Also no hate please. Constructive feedback is appreciated.

I need to apologize. I’ll text her, no I’ll call her.

No, it’s not as if I can call to chitchat. We don’t do that anymore. I no longer call to share stories about my life on the road because we only did that when we were together.

I stare daggers at my phone and fight very hard the urge to throw it at the wall. Fuck, why did I have to kiss her last night?

Instead I march right back into the studio, past the technician sitting at the soundboard. I push hard on the door to the live recording room and grab the nearest guitar. I strap it over my shoulder. I push my hands through my hair in frustration grabbing my headband to fold it up over my curls.

Without even looking through the window into the control room I can feel a few sets of eyes on me. I can tell the boys are watching me, quizzical, wondering what is going on as I begin playing.

But I don’t care who is watching, I just focus on the walls, the floors, the microphone so close to my face, and listen to the beats already forming, the chords coming together, the melody of my anger at myself- everything falling into place, as I play my guitar.

Forty minutes later I have several torn scribbled pages laying on the stand in front of me. I piece together the guitar licks and layer the words on top, raw like the notes are my emotions. Here, she is my muse.

If I was going to be an asshole I might as well go for the title of biggest asshole of the year, write a song about her. About us, if we are an -us.

Later that night I’m on my balcony listening to potential new songs and sound bites for the new album. My mind flashes to her like it often does. At the release of my second album Illuminate I thought I was happy with Kameron. That was back when I thought I knew what love was. But I was a fool and I got scared, so I let her go, and these stupid love songs sound foolish now. It’s not that she stopped being on my mind during the past two years, it’s that when you cease sharing the cute little stories with each other because you’re on break - eventually the break becomes permanent. Correction! I made our break permanent. I fucked up and now I was paying the price. Now she’s a mystery, but how I feel about her is about to be an open book.

Begin Flashback

Unable to process everything that Andrew had just asked her Kameron just stood silent. A fucking non-disclosure agreement! It had been less than 12 hours ago when Shawn asked for a break in his parent’s driveway after a dinner party. When he called this morning she had been hoping for reconciliation, hoping he’d changed his mind.

“I’m going home,” she said as she walked out his door to the elevator. Shawn grabbed her hand and stopped her.

“Please stay. I don’t want you to drive like this and we should talk some more.” There was urgency in his voice and eyes.

Kam pulled out of his grasp. “Clearly there are things that you have already discussed with your management team,” she snapped as she stepped into the elevator. “I think we covered this all yesterday Shawn, why did you bring me here.”

Kameron couldn’t help but look up at Shawn. There was no use in trying to hide her hurt over his deception. Shawn was trying to make sure that she would stay quiet.

“Kameron,” he said.

Kameron just shook her head and pushed the button. It was taking every fiber of her being not to break down completely in front of him. Tears pricked at the backs of her eyes but she wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of seeing how much they had gotten to her. Right as the doors started to seal she delivered a message, “Tell Andrew all your secrets are safe.”

However, once the doors closed, she didn’t bother hiding her feelings. Tears rained down her face.

End Flashback

Frustrated I set down my glass on the balcony and tried calling her one more time. I had already tried twice this evening and she didn’t answer either time. It had been two long years of regret and no girl came close to Kam. I realized immediately that I had made the biggest mistake of my life as I walked to my room, sunk down on my bed and cried after that elevator closed. That elevator closing became the metaphor of our relationship. Only another door never opened for me.

I took painstaking measures to try and cut her out of my life. Never once had I gone to any of the restaurants we used to frequent. I changed dry cleaners and stopped talking with friends who would constantly bring up old memories. Even still, Kam constantly was on my mind. Every time I would smell her perfume on a woman walking by, every time I heard certain songs on the radio or laughed at the cheesy super bowl ads; I saw Kam.

Exhaustion set in, so after a long steam shower I crawled into my 800 thread count pima cotton sheets. Lying in bed I thought about her changing into paper-thin night shorts and one of my t-shirts like she used to, her nipples perky and stiff underneath, no bra. My mouth was salivating, god how I dreamt of sucking on her nipples again, her creamy skin and rosy peaks such a deep shade of pink.

If this was wrong, I didn’t care. I took my cock and began to stroke myself like I had so many other nights before. Am I the asshole? Should I leave her alone, forget her, and let her continue to move on with her life. At this moment, I don’t care. I want her back.

Telling myself that she wasn’t being harmed any more emotionally during this process I kept at my sexual fantasy. I needed to get rid of the frustration that had been building prior to seeing her again. Matt warned me she looked good, but not that damn good.

Reaching down I palmed my cock. Panting, I stroked slow building up rhythm my other hand rubbing my balls as I thought of her hot, wet pussy. I remembered the way she smelled when our bodies were close, how much she always wanted me and the way her ass would bounce up and down in my hands. I was already imagining her over me, sliding inside her, thrusting and pulling back, only to go deep once more, stretching her, fully naked as she rode my cock.

Suddenly my fantasy took a left turn and Kam was on her knees. She slid her tongue in a slow tight circle across my crown that was already wet and ready for her mouth. Then she lowered her jaw and took me in fully. I felt my balls tighten and my thighs tense. I rutted desperately into my hands picturing her full lips sliding up and down my shaft. Like some teenager that first discovered dad’s playboy, before he could even grab a tissue, cum shot onto my abs as I gasped for breathe.  That had to be a record.

Next Day

After talking with Matt and his girlfriend I decided the easiest way to make Kam comfortable enough to want me again was to show her I’ve changed. I’d have a party and invite all our old friends when were us- Shawn & Kam, to meet my new friends. I want everyone important in my life to love her.

Currently I was standing in her kitchen hoping that she didn’t ruin all my plans. I just asked her to be my date to my party, what she didn’t know was the party was actually- her party.

I just stared at her, smiling at her beauty. She clasped her hands in her lap and looked down.

“Nope, can’t. I got to wash my hair”

“That’s a lie”

“I got to take my Mom to the airport.”

“Another lie, wow, you’ve become quite the little fibber.”

She raised her eyebrows a little, scrunching her button nose. “What’s the matter Mendes you’ve never been turned down before?” Reaching for her water bottle she took a pull of water wetting her lips continuing to stare at me. Talk about impenetrable, Kam was tough.

I reached out and touched one of the rips on her heather grey t-shirt dress, right where it rested over her collarbone. The material lifted and I felt the heat of her skin meeting my fingers right along the edge, she shivered. “The t-shirt gods must have heard my prayer.” I smirked. “I want you to sleep in my shirt.”

Shawn saw the apprehension wash over her face as she nervously pulled at the label of her water bottle before he stepped forward to grab it and set it aside.

“Shawn, you terrify me.” She declared with honesty.

“Likewise. Please stop worrying about tomorrow, just enjoy the party,” Shawn begged.

Her head tipped back in nervous laughter as she settled back into her cool exterior. “You’re funny, talented, you should be a comic.”

God his hand felt good there. His eyes darkened and the smirk lingered on his lips. “I have lots of talents, singer, play the guitar, good kisser… even better lover she thought."

“But I mean it. I’d love a date for my party Friday night. Kam, no one knows what’s going to happen from one day to the next, but if the world were to end tomorrow, there’s no place I’d rather be than right here with you. That tells me everything I need to know. I fucked it up, not you, but I’m asking for a second chance. I’m trying to make this right.”

She stopped and received his message. He wasn’t leering at her because he was interested in a friend, a sidekick or a companion. Shawn wanted a date. A shot. Shawn wanted hope. Her body reacted to his straightforwardness and for a moment she didn’t trust herself to speak.

Clearing her throat she pulled her eyes away from him, “Uh, its Friday night right?”

“Yep”

“I don’t know if I can get off, that’s one of my busiest nights at the bar and I really…” she stopped herself from revealing anything more about her current financial situation.

Shawn still had his hand on her collarbone and took that opportunity to reach in and pull her closer to him. The clothing felt like nothing now. There was no barrier between them. Looking down at her face he was unable to tear his hand away. He knew she felt this electric pull between them.

“I’d like you to be my date to my party Kam.” He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear with his other hand. When she looked up Shawn let his hand fall away from her ear, but still held onto her tightly. He was bold and didn’t want to move an inch before he had his answer from her.

“Um okay, I’ll ask Melissa to cover.”

The corner of his mouth lifted into a grin and his glimmering eyes moved to her lips. “Is that something like a yes?”

“Mmmm-hmmm”, she started to tease, but then Shawn dropped his head and his lips were on hers.

She gasped. The pleasure was immediate.

Her mouth was gentle, but he felt her reaction so he applied pressure. His touch grew more demanding until she was kissing him back. She wanted more and he groaned. His hand slid around to the back of her neck as he held her in his grip his mouth exploring hers, opening over and slipping inside.

Her small hands grasped his shoulders and he reveled in the sensation of her tiny fingers pushing up into his scalp fingering his curls. Need shot through his entire body.

Her arms slid under his shirt and moved over his back. His muscles trembled under her hands the feeling was intoxicating. She had power over him and yet she wanted more. Pulling back he studied her face.

She was panting lightly and so was he.

Shawn’s big hands caught the backs of her thighs and he lifted her up. Now sitting on the edge of the kitchen counter, he parted her legs and stood right between them. Within seconds she had wrapped her firm thighs around his torso tucking her heels into his ass. Another groan timbered his voice as Shawn began trailing kisses down her throat and over the thin t-shirt material covering her breasts. No bra. He noticed earlier that her breasts were full, nipples pinched. The dress was a barrier and he wanted it gone, but he didn’t want to make her afraid. Slowly Shawn traced one hand along her thigh skimming the hem line.

“Shawn”, she gasped as her hands tumbled into his hair with a gentle tug.

As Shawn continued to suckle her breast he looked up from her now wet T-shirt. Wrecked and ruined her eyes pleaded for relief.

He nodded at her, knowing exactly what she needed without words. Sliding his hands up the sides of her thighs he waited, rested his hands on her hips for a second underneath her dress, silently asking permission. As he continued to hold her gaze one of his hands moved lower and his finger slid inside her thong.

Her entire body jerked, exploding at his touch. She didn’t climax, but she almost did. She clamped around him as he buried his finger inside her. He pulled out the finger just a bit and then leaned down to kiss her as she hitched herself closer around his waist. His finger moved in and out, again and again. He kept going. She was helpless against his onslaught and didn’t want him to stop. Shawn could feel her trembling but she didn’t cum, not yet. She wanted to wait, to hold off- but Shawn never stopped. In and out, slide in, pull out and back again.

“Shawn”. Her lips brushed over his.

Shawn kept going.

“Shawn, please.”

“Please what, baby?” His voice was just as thick and hoarse as hers.

She tried to grab his wrists to pause his finger fucking. In response, he went in even deeper and even slipped in a second finger. She could only gasp, mouth hanging wide open as the pleasure went through her. Wave after wave coursed through her coating Shawn’s fingers.

“Shawn- oh my God!”

Shawn lifted his lips to her ear and panted in desperation voice stiff with tension, “Let go, please, sweetheart.” He kissed and sucked on her ear mouthing wet heavy kisses on her neck.

“You’re not finished baby let me do this for you.” Just then Shawn slipped a third finger in stretching her even further than she had been in so long. His fingers moved together, going deep, sliding back, going in again and picking up the pace.

She was breathing heavily, panting loudly into the room, his name coming from her lips like a prayer over and over again. He pushed his thumb over her clit and gave a few more hard thrusts of his fingers and she soared over the edge clawing at his back in desperation. Tremors wracked her body and he held her as she rode each wave until she was completely satisfied.

10 minutes later

“Shawn what is it you want from me?”

“In what way? Right now, out of life, us? Be specific Kam.”

“Well what do you really want right now at this very moment?” Tying her hands up on her lap she stared him proudly in the face not ashamed of what they had just done.

“You won’t fault me for my answer?”

“As long as it is truly what you’re thinking….no.”

His voice was blunt and assertive. “I really want your tongue on my cock.”

Yup, he’d lost it. He was about to get slapped.

Her eyelashes flickered seductively, her thighs still moist and slick with need.

Clearing the frog in her throat, “Um, what else?”

That’s interesting, this is new.

“After you take me into your mouth, I want to strip you naked and eat your pussy right before I fuck you from behind with your hands plastered against this counter.” Shawn pushed off the counter and leaned toward her.

“Then what.” She whispered breathlessly.

“I want to come inside of you”. Shawn groaned shifting his cock in his pants which was now hard and leaking.

“Then,” She smirked.

Shawn just now realized she held the upper hand. Her eyes sparkled with mischief; he’d seen that look before.

“Then….we eat pizza in bed naked”, he laughed deep in his belly. “You’re fucking with me aren’t you? I’m not getting in your pants today am I.”

She hopped off the counter. “Nope, but I made you sweat a bit lover boy. Thanks for the finger fuck it was just like old times. Now it’s time for you to go because I got class.”

“That’s cold Kam! You’re just going to leave me with the biggest set of blue balls.”

“Payback is a bitch.” She channeled her inner Regina George and stalked confidently out of the kitchen to open the front door for Shawn.

"Next time bring flowers," she smiled sweetly and kissed his cheek. She closed the door, shock still evident on Shawn's face.

Friday Night

I slipped on the little black slip dress with the crisscrossed straps in the back and stared at myself in the mirror. Long blonde hair, curves, round booty and lips that I always thought were much too full.

In fact when I was a teenager I’d tried to find ways to make them appear smaller, especially when Tommy Childers had teased me at a party with a cruel comment in 10th grade, telling everyone that I had “cock sucking lips.” I’d been mortified at the time, and even to this day, still felt a little self-conscious about them.

I’d confided all this to James, my neighbor BFF, as I was talking about having them reduced. He’d looked at me like I lost my mind. Gay men have no filter.

“Women have their lips filled with collagen to get what you already have honey. Don’t you dare touch those lips.”

Thus, I hadn’t touched them, but neither had anyone else in the last two years after Shawn. Needless to say hanging out with James & Greg hearing about their sexual exploits was beginning to drive me crazy. I was over Shawn, but found myself fantasizing about sex at the most inopportune times.  I was currently blaming him for my lapse in judgement yesterday.

“Ready?” James asked pulling me from my thoughts. He was wearing a black structured Armani jacket, white tee and dark denim jeans that fit snugly on his athletic body. James was hot, in a male model kind of way and would definitely make Shawn jealous tonight. He didn’t have to know James was married to a world class chef.

“Yes. Wow, you look so polished and sexy.” I smiled stroking his ego.

He lifted his chin in the air and posed. “Saks, Armani, in honor of our host.”

I sighed put my hands on my hips, and posed. “H&M, discount rack.”

He burst out laughing and grabbed my hand. “Doesn’t matter you still look good, even with that obnoxious cleavage?”

I looked down. “Obnoxious.”

“Calm down negative Nancy, I’m just giving you shit,” he said as he dragged me out the door locking it behind him.

“I’m sure you’re every heterosexual man’s wet dream in that dress and those slutty boots, Kam. Take a chill-pill there can only be one queen tonight.”

“Remember boo what we talked about” I giggled.

He paused, “Got it, more Clint Eastwood and less Barbara.” He did a quick twirl and looped his arm in mine for effect. This is why I loved him so much. James was my first friend when I moved into the neighborhood. James picked up the pieces after Shawn. Without James I would be alone in my apartment, arguing with my cat, and searching the remote controls for batteries for my vibrator. This was definitely going to be much more stimulating evening. I hoped.

[doctorgayass]

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holy fuck why are you like this i’m not that interesting of a person

1. I had my first crush when i was 5 but didn’t realize cause gayyyy

2. I speak english, a little bit of french, and understand a bit of chinese

3. I have weird nicknames

4. One of those nicknames is karl (don’t ask)

5. I have short blackish brown hair

6. My parents are still together

7. My family is homophobic

8. I have a brother 

9. My brother is 4 years older than me

10. I am currently struggling to think of facts

11. I am very smol

12. I have A’s in everything except for P.E right now

13. I’m a bit of a kiss ass

14. I am on the school basketball team

15. I want to learn rugby

16. I want to learn how to play the trumpet

17. Also wanna play the drums

18. And guitar

19. And baritone

20. If you haven’t noticed i am a musican

21. I just to be lgbt-phobic

22. And used to have bigoted opinons

23. I’m still trying to unlearn those things

24. I just recently got into hamilton

25. My favourite singer is Halsey

26. My favourite band is Panic at the Disco

27. I am strong

28. I literally have 20 pounds worth of muscle

29. I’m not afraid to get into a fight

30. I actually use the homerow when typing

31. I spell favourite with a u

32. I’m Chinese-Canadian

33. I was born in Canada

34. I’ve only been to China twice

35. I don’t like Christmas

36. I take sleeping pills

37. My first fandom was Harry Potter

38. I realized i was gay cause of Emma Watson

39. The cast of greys also helped a lot

40. I started questioning my gender cause of my sexuality

41. That last one made no sense it literally just went like “oh okay i’m gay, what if i was also trans hahahha oops i actually am”

42. I have too many celeb crushes

43. I wanna move to Switzerland

44. My favourite song atm is Castle by Halsey

45. I have 217 songs on my playlist

46. Mostly made up of Halsey, p!atd, mcr, and hamilton

47. There’s also a lot of Hayley Kiyoko 

48. And Fall Out Boy

49. I can’t spell anything

50. I swear too much

51. I thought about changing my name to Jo before Skyler

52. My birthday is August 9

53. This is kinda painful to do

54. I am stuck

55. I used to swim

56. And ski

57. I really like volleyball

58. And fencing

59. And i do rockclimbing

60. I’m planning on doing kickboxing

61. My timezone is PST

62. This is taking a very long time

63. I seriously doubt anyone will read to here

64. Let alone the other hundred facts

65. I like P.E

66. I am doing social dancing in P.E right now

67. I am very stubborn

68. And will not back down from a dare

69. I don’t like dancing

70. Plus i’m too gay to dance with boys

71. My parents suck

72. My brother sucks

73. I accidentally numbered that last one 42

74. I do not have a good relationship with my brother

75. Or my dad

76. Or mom

77. I haven’t had a good relationship with my brother since i was 8

78. His name is Winston

79. My crush has Tumblr

80. I don’t know her tumblr

81. I wish i knew her tumblr

82. I honestly don’t know exactly how many hearts there are cause i can’t count

83. But I know it’s a big number

84. The first time i counted i got 183

85. For Christmas I got a video game and $20

86. My cousins are currently in san diego 

87. I will probably get more when they come back

88. But i’m still not expecting much

89. Tiger is an orange tabby

90. Bobby is a grey tabby-ish cat

91. I don’t actually know their breeds

92. I got Tiger in February?

93. I got Bobby in April/May

94. I am in jazz band

95. I play tenor sax

96. I sit beside my crush in jazz

97. jazz starts at 7 15 

98. Which means i have to get up before the sun rises on those days

99. Basketball practice also usually ends when the sun is setting

100. When school starts again on tuesdays i will leave for school before the sun rises and leave when the sun is setting

101. I go to the smallest high school in my city

102. I have been doing this for 20 minutes

103. I am honestly kinda proud of myself for being able to concentrate on this for so long

104. Also kinda mad cause why am i able to concentrate on this but not my homework

105. I still have another ask after this

106. i showed this to my friends so now i owe one of my friends a few facts

107. I am very secretive

108. I just switched from Halsey to Hamilton

109. I love music

110. This is easier than i thought it’d be

111. I have a friend coming over tomorrow

112. Yes these facts are random as fuck but that’s because i have struggling

113. I also realize i said this is easier than i thought but it’s still hard

114. I refuse to get too personal with these.

115. The first fact i thought of was the fact i’m gay

116. I have switched between labels many times

117. I prefer he/him over she/her

118. But they/them is  always the best

119. I hate loud sounds

120. I currently have 4 tabs open

121. I like to mash swears together to make weird swears

122. The one i use the most often is dickshit

123. My laptop is very slow

124. I have Instagram

125. I also have Snapchat

126. And twitter

127. But i never really use it

128. I also have Quotev

129. And probably a lot of other accounts i can’t remember

130. I don’t use spotify

131. I use deezer

132. My favourite lyric is “I can’t get rid of this awful energy” 

133. The lyric is from Control by Halsey

134. My favourite lyric from hamilton is “Immigrants, we get the job done”

135. I really like b99

136. I can relate a lot to Christina Yang

137. I’m stuck again

138. I’m so close yet so far

139. I honestly can’t believe that I HAVE this many facts

140. I have tiny hands

141. And feet

142. I wear 7.5 sneakers 

143. My feet are actually size 5

144. I say pop not soda

145. I have moved twice in my life

146. My dream school is Cornell

147. My mom wants me to go into business

148. I want to be a doctor

149. My elementary only had 300 people

150. My school currently has 1200 people

151. My city has over 500, 000 people

152. I like working out

153. I did gymnastics for 4 years

154. I can do the full splits

155. I really like hoodies

156. I’m in charge of the laundry in my house

157. I would be very impressed if someone actually read everything

158. I want coke right now

159. The drink not the drug

160. I’m going to grab a pop now

161. I just got a pop

162. I like it

163. I will get you back for this

164. I really should not be doing this

165. i get injured a lot

166. I am extremely stubborn

167. I am extremely clumsy

168. I have a friend named charley

169. And monica

170. But i always spell it monika to annoy her

171. I’m afraid of spiders

172. I also have a friend named rachel

173. I’m not afraid of heights

174. i actually really like high places

175. I am gay

So i did it. You better be proud of me. Props to anyone that actually read everything