#what happened to ‘prevention is the best medicine’

[cerealxperimentslain]

“a lot of people go to the doctor when they really don’t have to” i don’t actually care about the feelings of doctors, sorry! as someone in my 20s with several Medical Conditions there is nothing i hate more than “doctor who resents you for having the gall to think you might have a medical condition in your 20s” and that’s the majority of doctors i’ve seen.

one doctor even tried to argue that actually i was mistaken about my at the time only Medical Condition as a way to undermine me, because he was too lazy to do more than glance at my medical journal. then he gave me a lecture about how i should just do as im told and how i dont want to have a medical condition because people who have those take a lot of medicine every day, and also that even if i did have a medical condition there’s nothing they can do about it anyway. (then when i left he called me the equivalent in tone of something like “toots”, but that’s a different story) (for any swedish understanders it was “stumpan”)

now, when it comes to my health i am a stubborn shithead so i will just keep going to the doctor until i have a satisfactory explanation, but many people don’t have the time or energy or (especially in places like the us) money to do that.

and surprise surprise! turns out when i kept going back to the doctor they actually did find another Medical Condition after all! (turns out you can have those at literally any age) and since then i have gotten one of those extremely rare doctors who actual cares to see you get better (a specialist doctor to be specific, and i specify because in my experience they are generally way more likely to actually care) so now i not only have regular testing to see that it doesn’t get worse (and getting worse in this case can literally kill me), but i even have medicine that makes me better!!! wow!!!!!!!

[theprissythumbelina]

So you want to write about horses.

Part 2 now out!

Or you're writing and horses show up. Or its a pre-industrial fantasy and your characters have to get somewhere. Or you have a faint idea of your MC's love interest showing up on a white stallion.

Whatever the cause, you're writing, and a horse appears. But you know nothing about horses. I can help.

This is a horse. Horses come in many sizes.

^ Big Jake, a Belgian Draft horse, and a roughly 5 foot woman for scale.

1 hand = 4 inches = 10.16 cm

Once a horse is smaller than about 14.2hh, it is generally considered a pony. In the modern day, ponies are not considered suitable for adult riders due to weight and height issues. Some pony breeds, such as Welsh, Fjords, ect. are known for being sturdy, and can more easily carry adult sized humans. Miniature horses should never be ridden by adults.

^The only suitable 'riding' a miniature horse should do

The above graphic mentions that horses are measured from the top of the withers, not the top of the head. But, what are withers?

The withers are where the horse's shoulders meet the spine, and the neck becomes the back. Withers are incredibly important for saddle placement, as a badly placed saddle in this area can prevent a horse from moving its legs properly, cause a large amount of pain, and even damage a horse's spine. Speaking of spines, this is a horse skeleton, with the withers pointed out.

Horses have four legs. Horses cannot have any fewer than four legs. They are obligate quadrupeds. This is, in part, due to their weight, as well as the construction of their legs and hooves. This is to say, that while cats, dogs, and other animals can be amputees, a horse, short of some incredible magic solution, cannot. Even a broken leg bone will cause a huge amount of problems, as all of the weight that leg would usually hold must be shifted to the other feet, and this causes a condition called laminitis, where the tissue that holds together the hoof and the toe bone becomes inflamed, and begins to separate. Once this happens, the hoof tissue dies from lack of blood, and the bone begins to rotate. This is extremely painful for the horse, and so often the best solution for a horse with a broken leg is to be spared that pain. Famous American racehorse Barbaro experienced a complex broken bone, which began to heal fine, but complications from laminitis in two of his other legs caused him to be put down. This is why media will almost always show a horse with a broken or injured leg being 'taken care of'.

^Barbaro, in his prime. Even the best veterinary medicine couldn't save him.

Now, racehorses like Barbaro are moving at the fastest speed and the fastest gait of the horse, the gallop. The patterns that horses move their feet are referred to as gaits, with most horses having four, with some breeds having five or more.

The first gait and the slowest is the walk. In the walk, all four feet move independently, which leads it to be called a four-beat gait, as the footfalls make a sort of drumbeat on the ground.

The next gait is the trot, a two beat gait with diagonal pairs of legs moving together.

^Diagonal pairs marked in red and blue

The trot is a very bouncy experience for the rider, and can be uncomfortable. Some riders will rise and fall with a pair of diagonal legs, called a posting trot, some will stand in their stirrups, called a two-point or jump position, and some will sit the trot, which requires a lot of core strength (seriously, if you want a strong core, screw the gym)

The third gait is the canter, a three-beat gait with a single diagonal pair. This gait is ridden sitting, and feels a lot like going over waves on a jetski. There is a rise, a scoop, and a fall feeling. The canter is also called a lope in Western riding, they are the same gait.

^diagonal pair marked in red

A gallop is sometimes considered a variation on canter, as it is similar save for the legs actually moving in a four-beat pattern. As you can see with the image of Barbaro, all four of his feet are moving in different patterns, at different times, even though the gallop is really a four beat version of the canter. Riders in the gallop rise off the horse's back into a raised position, which allows the horse to use the full length of its spine and musculature to get as much reach and speed as possible. It feels like riding on top of a train barreling down the tracks, at least until your horse takes an unexpected turn and the ground is suddenly the only thing you're riding.

^ I've been there. The trick is to push away and hit the ground rolling, it hurts less that way. And don't land on your head.

That's all for this post. I'll have more when I feel like it, and send me questions if you want to know more about specific things or need a writing question answered

Reblogs welcome and encouraged

@jacqueswriteblrlibrary for wider reach

[vrisrezis]

Atsv characters taking care of s/o in pain

Fun fact I deal with physical pain a lot bcuz my health is shit. I have been in so much pain I couldn’t even sleep for the last 2 days. Was especially bad today so here’s smth kinda self indulgent.

(Hc portion)

Gwen is insistent on having miguel or jessica check you out to see if they could possibly ease your pain. Miguel is from the future technically, there has to be something. She hates the idea of you being in so much pain you can’t even lie down comfortably, you can’t sit still, you can’t sleep, or even worse if you start crying? She feels awful. She has heating packs to help you ease your pain if it helps, and she keeps you on a strict schedule with taking medication so that your pain is as limited as possible. She does everything she can for you, especially given the lack of knowledge she has on this typa thing.

(Small fic portion)

“I hate seeing you like this” she sighs, kissing you on the forehead, pressing the big heating pack to your stomach. There is instant relief, even if that relief is short lived and your once again reminded of your pain, she still feels you relax. Even if only slightly. “I’m sorry I can’t do more for you.” she frowns, feeling guilt.

“Nonsense” you say, giving her a weak smile, putting a hand on her cheek. She puts her hand on yours, holding it in place on her cheek. “You being here is enough for me. You did everything you could. This is just… how it is, yknow?”

She sighs, taking your hand off her cheek so she can kiss your knuckles. “But it shouldn’t be. You shouldn’t have to deal with this. I wish I could just take this pain away from you.” she presses her forehead against yours, and for a moment, even if it was brief, you feel peace.

(Hc portion)

Miles is so unsure how he can help you but damn if he isn’t determined as fuck to help ease your pain even if only slightly. He is extremely sympathetic towards you. He genuinely cannot imagine how it must be to constantly go through pain to the point you can’t even get proper rest. He will try to get you to relax your muscles, which can be difficult granted the pain you’re in, but he knows if he’s able to succeed with that you can at least get some sleep. Back massages or even massaging the places that hurt, he’s all on it. Always has medicine with him, might even ask his mom to watch over you for him while he’s gone doing Spiderman stuff, even if just to check on you.

(Short fic portion)

“You didn’t have to do this miles,” you say, chugging down your third dose of ibuprofen today. “Thank you though.” you say, before lying back down.

“Of course I had to do this for you babe!” he says with a roll of his eyes, annoyed you’d even suggest he didn’t have to help you out. “If I can’t be here for you in your time of need, what’s the point in being your boyfriend, your best friend for that matter.” he continues to speak as he lies down next to you. “Roll over.” he commands, which you aren’t quite used to him doing. He’s been acting rather motherly towards you lately, but you can’t exactly blame him with the state you’ve been in.

You follow his orders and do so, and he begins to message your back, and you audibly sigh without meaning to. He laughs as a result, making you laugh too. “Shut up.” you roll your eyes, and he can’t help but laugh even more. “Hey I’m glad you’re just finally relaxing.” he says before kissing the back of your neck.

Somehow you’re boyfriend always knows how to make your agonizing pain a bit more bearable.

(Hc portion)

My man hobie somehow manages to get his hands on morphine. You will not be dealing with this pain on his watch, he will find a way. High key hates the fact you’re going through this and does everything he can to ease it or prevent it. Might talk to you about random shit, about his day or about other people or crazy shit that happened, anything as a means to distract you. Though this can prove to be difficult, hobie has a relaxing voice and he’s able to soothe you no matter how bad your pain is. Might sing ya to sleep with his lovely voice.

(Small fic portion)

Your quiet as you listen to hobie hum. While his music tastes consisted of punk (obviously) he was a bit of a metal head as well, and it’s not that you didn’t like that genre of music but it was far from relaxing. So you had calmly asked hobie if he could please sing something that wasn’t so intense.

Soft shit was not his thing but if it eased your pain, who is he to complain?

He had his arms around you, your head on his chest and you felt it rumble as he quietly sang to you.

“Cariño, eres un amor”

“Something about you babe.”

“Something about you babe”

he finally finishes, and you smile for the first time today.

“Thank you, hobie.” you whisper, and he kisses the crown of your head. “Anytime hun”

(Hc portion)

Pavitr feels terrible omg bless this boy he does everything he can. Buys you a lot of fattening foods as tribute. He knows he shouldn’t make it a habit especially if you’re pain is like constant and happens a lot but he cannot help himself. His baby should not be in pain! Sometimes kisses the spots your in pain and likes to rub the spots in an attempt to soothe you and your pain. Buys a lot of medicine and pain relief creams. May try to distract you with watching movies and stuff, but also will straight up ask you if there’s any other way he can help you. Definitely makes you peppermint tea to help ease your pain.

(Small fic portion)

You drink the last of your tea, placing the empty cup on your end table and lay all the way back next to your boyfriend. He offers to put the cup in your sink and clean it, but you shake your head. “It’s fine I can do it tomorrow.” you say, before resting your cheek on his shoulder, “besides I want you here with me.” you admit, and he smiles at your little confession before wrapping is arms around you in an embrace. “Aww babe!” he says, before smooching you on the cheek with an annoyingly loud, “mwah!”

you laugh as he attempts to kiss you more all over your face, putting your hand on his face and pushing him in an attempt to get him to stop smothering you. “Baby cut it out!” you laugh, “why? I just wanna love youuuu!” he whines, and you giggle, “because I’m trying to watch the movie!”

Your boyfriend sighs before conceding. “Fine.” he says, and you finally turn back to watch the movie.

“Just kidding!” he says quickly, attacking your neck with little kisses this time, making you laugh even harder than before. “Oh babe Cmon!”

He’s just glad he succeeded in distracting you from your pain, for a little while.

[domnamewoman]

I was wondering if I could request an angst we’re all of the MK 2023 characters S/O get turned injured severely by Titian Shang Tsung (could have a happy end, could not…up too you!)

Characters: Liu Kang, Raiden, Kung Lao, Johnny Cage, Kenshi Takahashi, Kitana, Mileena, Tanya, Sub-Zero, Scorpion, Smoke, Reptile, Baraka, Shang Tsung, Rain

Warnings: Angst 😭, Canon-Typical Violence

Masterlist

Requests Are Open

Liu Kang’s heart stopped as he saw your body lying there, lifeless on the ground. He bent down to cradle you in his arms as tears fell from his eyes. He couldn’t believe it, the love of his life was now gone. He blamed himself for not getting there in time. Why was fate always so cruel, was he really destined to be alone? No, no he wouldn’t accept it. He was the Keeper of Time. He would reverse time and make sure that he is here to prevent such a horrid outcome. He would end Titan Shang Tsung once and for all.

Raiden felt as though he could throw up as he looked at your unconscious body lying in the bed. Titan Shang Tsung had blasted you off a cliff and you hit your head on a rock when you landed. The physician told Raiden that you were in a coma from the head injury. There was no telling when you would wake up or if you ever would. Raiden held your hand and rested his forehead on it as he let his tears fall. All he could do was stay by your side and wait. And he would, even if it was forever.

Kung Lao was angry. At himself for not being there, at the physicians for not being able to save you, but mostly at Titan Shang Tsung. He was the cause of all of this. Kung Lao placed one last kiss on your lips as he promised you to get revenge. He would stop at nothing to see Titan Shang Tsung taken down. He pushed his grief to the side and focused on making a plan to get to Titan Shang Tsung. He would grieve once his promise to you was fulfilled.

Johnny Cage struggled to find meaning in anything anymore. Without you, there just wasn’t any point to life for Johnny. Who cared about the movies, or the awards, or even saving Earthrealm from destruction? He couldn’t bring you back by doing any of it so he deemed it all useless. Johnny stopped trying, losing his arrogance and bravado. How great is “Johnny Cage” if he can’t even save his love? He was nothing but a failure in his eyes now and that’s how he would live.

Kenshi Takahashi felt all the joy in his life slipping away as he felt your blood slip through his fingers where he was applying pressure to your wound. He tried to smile and reassure you that the physician was on their way and you would make it out alive but he knew it was too late. He knelt there, helpless as you exhaled your final breath, going completely limp. Kenshi sat there with you in his arms for hours, pushing away Johnny and Kung Lao as they tried to get him to let you go. He couldn’t, not ever.

Kitana released a scream as she heard your neck snap at the hands of Titan Shang Tsung. Why? Why did it have to be you to charge at him? Why didn’t you listen to her when she told you to wait? Why couldn’t she move fast enough to prevent this from happening? Kitana gripped your shirt and cried into your chest as the fight continued around her. How was she supposed to go on? But she had to, for you. It’s what you would have wanted her to do. She vows to you as she grabs her bladed fans that she will avenge your death.

Mileena spent all of her time trying to find someone to help you. She was the Empress and she would spare no cost of getting the best physicians, the best medicine, whatever was needed to accelerate your healing process. The court could be mad all they wanted, but she didn’t care about her duties. Her only priority right now was seeing you healthy and back on your feet again. The only thing that could distract her from this is any updates on Titan Shang Tsung’s whereabouts. She would make sure that he died by her hands for harming her love.

Tanya watched in unbelief as Titan Shang Tsung stuck his claws deep into your abdomen. You crumpled to the ground, coughing up blood. Tanya rushed over and held you in her arms. She didn’t know how could she let this happen. She was Umgadi for goodness sake. And yet, she could protect her love from danger. She pulled you out of the path of battle, making sure you were as comfortable as you could be as she applied pressure to your wounds. She would make sure that you survived no matter what.

Bi-Han was filled with rage. Titan Shang Tsung dared to take his love away from him. How could Bi-Han call himself Earthrealm’s protector when he couldn’t even protect you? No, he would make Titan Shang Tsung pay for what he did. Bi-Han would gather all of the Lin Kuei and hunt him down. No longer was their purpose protecting Earthrealm. Their only mission was to kill Titan Shang Tsung to avenge the death of his lover. Nothing else mattered or was more important to him.

Kuai Liang couldn’t control the fire rolling off of his body as he saw you there unmoving, at Titan Shang Tsung’s feet. He rushed toward him, swinging out his chained knives aiming for his head. Kuai Liang fought with everything in him, letting his anger fuel his fire. He didn’t worry about his own well-being, what was the point now that you were gone? He ignored all the pain from his injuries and pressed on. He would put an end to Titan Shang Tsung, or he would die trying.

Tomas ran with all his might holding on to your limp body. He had to get you to a physician and quick. He couldn’t, no, he wouldn’t lose another family member. After his family was killed and he joined the Lin Kuei, he thought he would never have to go through heartache like that again. He couldn’t imagine a world without you. He pleaded with you to stay with him as he looked down at you taking shallow breaths. He ignored the burning in his legs and he pushed himself to run faster. He won’t lose you too.

Syzoth didn’t believe what they told him when he arrived at the palace. How could you be dead? It wasn’t possible. While he was out on a mission Titan Shang Tsung attacked? No, no that couldn’t be. He continued to deny it until they brought him to see your body. This couldn’t be happening to him again. Why could he never protect his loved ones? Why did he always have to be left completely alone? He will get his revenge. He will take away everything that Titan Shang Tsung has ever held dear.

Baraka knew that fate could be cruel when he got infected with Tarkat. But he thought he would be allowed some form of happiness in his life. That proved to be wrong when you were killed, leaving him all alone. Baraka could feel his sanity slipping. He was left with nothing yet again. The only one he loved was taken from him. All he could think about was shredding Titan Shang Tsung into pieces. He would turn into the savage beast everyone thought he was. He had nothing more to lose.

Shang Tsung couldn’t believe you were killed. To make matters worse, it was at the hands of his doppelganger. Shang Tsung would question what type of person he was for there to be a version of himself out there that would commit such a heinous act. Shang Tsung would practice all the sorcery in the world to find a way to bring you back. He didn’t care how many souls he had to steal. Starting with the soul of Titan Shang Tsung. He would prove that he was the best version in all timelines.

Zeffeero dropped to his knees in front of your lifeless body. What was it all for? He spent all his time trying to get power and status and for what? Just for the beloved to no longer be a part of his life? Zeffeero looked up, no one seemed to notice you, the most important person to him, lying on the cold ground. No, they didn’t get to go on with their lives like nothing happened. He would ruin their lives just like his now was. He would rain down an endless flood and drown them all.

[cdragons]

can we please have more headcanons on being friends with rob, jon and theon plz!!!

A/N: There are no words to describe how sorry I am for how long this took. I had so many incomplete fics on the backburner and finals are the WORST. But I hope this makes up for it!

This takes place in the same universe where the reader is Luwin's apprentice and grew up with the boys!

-> It was a well-known fact to the smallfolk residents of Winter Town that one of their own had managed to rise to the station of being an apprentice for THE Starks' one and only maester. Since then, you became a very popular figure for them.

-> If you weren't at the Winterfell Library or studying with Maester Luwin, you could often be found wandering around WInter Town and getting to know the townsfolk on a more personal level than the Starks. You were especially popular with mothers and children. You took special care to teach them how to gather special herbs for simple home remedies instead of medicine they cannot afford.

-> For the smallfolk children, you were used to them after years of being around the Starks when they were young, so you knew exactly how to handle them. As you became more competent and reliable, Luwin gave you more responsibilities and much more free time than when you first began. As a result, when a child would scrape their knee or get a cold, you were the first person people looked for help.

-> You soon became known as the 'Winter Fairy' to the smallfolk because you were always willing to help them with their troubles.

-> You even got money for your services to the Winter Town brothel. The girls adored you. You had herbs and remedies that made their lives so much easier: herbs to prevent pregnancies, remedies to quickly heal bruises and dark spots from a rough patron, poultices and ointments for rashes and sores, teas to reduce fevers and flush out illness - you were a gem!

-> Luwin didn't love that you were getting money for your help, but he supposed that since you were still just an apprentice, you needed to find a way to get money for more personal reasons. The Starks would pay you a fair wage when you became a full-time healer, and Luwin offered you a few coins as an allowance - but you refused to take his money. THis seemed like a much better manner of business to you.

-> The only ones who didn't seem to know of your services were the Stark Children and Theon. And you preferred it that way. Robb, Jon, and Theon were your best friends, but they could be so possessive of your time.

-> It seemed that the older you all grew, the more they expected that your time and your life be readily available for them and only them.

-> Theon was easily the worst of the three. He would find you wandering Winter Town on your own and would outright demand to know what you were skipping your duties - as if he wasn't doing the same thing. He would grab your arm and drag you all the way back. You could have been screaming, kicking, and throwing the worst tantrum a child could imagine - he would still put you in your place.

-> It was really bad when he found you at the brothel after he had spent some well-spent money on Ros, only to find you at the entrance in a thick cloak. He barked out your name, and you quickly tried to leave with your things before he could catch you. But you were much too slow, and he all-to-easily wrapped his hand around your wrist and led you out of the establishment.

"How can you be so stupid," he barked while dragging you. "You're a girl, alone, walking into a brothel like that? What would've happened if I wasn't there?" You struggled against him. "It's not like I was doin' anything bad or illegal," you snarled. "I was just selling herbs and teas for them! Maester Luwin said I could!" But Theon didn't hear any of it. "What if a man thought you were a new girl, huh? He would've paid for you and took you while you were cryin' and screaming without a care for your tears." "Nothing would've happened," you protested. "The madam of the place likes me! So do the girls - they wouldn't let anything happen to me!" "Stupid girl," Theon muttered while shaking his head. "From now on, you're not allowed to leave without me, Robb, or Jon with you. Gods know you can't be trusted on your own."

-> Robb was almost as bad as Theon. He would've been much, much worse if he hadn't been so busy with his duties as the first son and heir. He does place a great deal of trust in you. After all, you were approved by his father AND Luwin, and you were the smartest person he'd ever met, so he knows he can trust you on your own.

-> That is until when you become more lovely and beautiful as you grow older, and more men begin to notice you. Specifically, men who were allowed to flirt and court you because they were of similar stations to you. Knights, stableboys, stewards, and valets would come to you for the most minor things as an excuse to be near you, and it infuriated Robb to the point where he asked his father to order Luwin to order you to exclusively treat women and children.

-> To say you were furious was an understatement.

"How dare you?!" you demanded. You had returned from treating one of the sick children in Winter Town when you were ordered to meet with your mentor. "You had no right!" "Love," Robb sighed while pinching the bridge between his eyes. "What exactly d'you think I did?" "Do not take me for a fool, Robb Stark!" you snarled. "Asking Lord Stark to tell Luwin that I can only treat women and children is a gross insult to me and my skills!" "You're not qualified to treat knights and men!" Robb protested. "I'm saving you more trouble in the end!" Robb knew what he was saying wasn't true. You were more qualified - years after treating him, Jon, and Theon for their mishaps in the courtyard proved that. But what mattered was him convincing you to think you weren't qualified. It was of the utmost importance that you not be near anyone who could flirt and woo you. It was petty and childish, but Robb didn't care. "How can you be so mean?" you whimpered. You wanted to cry. "I know I'm good enough! You're lucky that Lord Stark laughed it off as a joke when I came to him!" "He what?!" Robb balked. "That's right," you nodded. "And if you ever pull something like this again, I won't ever help you if you get hurt in the courtyard again!"

-> Jon was a different beast altogether. Like the other two, he got unreasonably jealous when men would flirt with you - even if it wasn't serious. But he knew better than to insult your character or question your skills and professionalism. He understood that it was your job to care for those men, but that didn't mean he had to like it. Especially when he sees how oblivious you are to how much those men stare and long for you the same way he does.

-> He hated it because it reminded him how his status as a bastard meant he had nothing to offer you. Those men weren't good enough for you - none of them were. But they could provide for you, unlike him. But instead of pissing you off by getting angry with you, he'd just distance and brood to himself. He wouldn't be near you and instead would order Ghost to follow you around in his stead - which, if anything, pissed you off even more.

"Well?" Jon looked up from his sword to see you standing before him with your hands placed on your hips. You looked absolutely enraged at him, and Jon had a slight inkling why. "Umm," he cleared his throat. "I dunno what you mean, my lady." He stood and tried to walk away. "I think I hear Robb callin' for me, so I best be off." "I didn't hear Robb call your name," you growled. You shifted from your spot to block his path. "I don't hear anyone - everyone's in the Great Hall." "Yes, the Great Hall," Jon murmured. "Which is where I believe you're supposed to be as well." You stomped down your foot in frustration. "Don't act smart with me, Lord Jon," you ordered. "I can see you trying to avoid me. Every time I try to talk to you, you pretend you have something to do, or someone's calling for you when I know you didn't have chores or duties to do at any of those times." Jon looked down at his feet. "I dunno what you're on about," he muttered. "I've been busy, that's all. Even if I'm just a bastard, I still have duties to this house." "UGH! You're so infuriating!" you groaned. "I don't care that you're a bastard, y'hear me? You're my best friend, and that's all that matters to me! Who the fuck cares what anyone else thinks?!" When Jon tried to respond, you cut him off. "And before you try any of that 'it's not good for you to be seen with me' sheep dung, may I remind you that I was a smallfolk girl who ran away from home? If anything, I'm lower than you, and you don't see me caring." You walked closer to him. "And neither should you." Jon couldn't do anything but dumbly nod. His silent response made you smile. "Good," you held out your hand. "C'mon now, I'm starving, and I know you are too. And you should really reward Ghost better. He's been putting in an awful lot of work following me around and scaring my patients - 'specially my male ones." "Attaboy, Ghost," Jon thought to himself.

Let me know what you think in the comments and if you wanna be tagged for more GOT, HOTD, and/or ASOIAF content! If you have any ideas or suggestions, please drop an ask in my ask box!

[mire-7viii]

When the message is that people often "choose" prostitution because there's no safe alternative, you are describing the absence of choice. The core of the problem.

The solution is not to make that choice more bearable, but to create better options. People prefer focussing on minimising the damage instead rather than drawing a line. It is nothing short of putting a bandaid on a severed limb. It's better to help prostituted women get out of that industry entirely. Any others who choose to prostitute themselves are uniquely privileged in who their clients are, what they do, who they work for, and when they can exit the industry. They are the minority in prostitution, pornography, cam-work and strip clubs.

While in contact with humans and/or their fluids, every other profession (doctors, dentists, nail techs, kitchen workers, etc.) mandates their employees (sometimes the clients/patients also) to wear sanitized and protective gear.

Prostitutes are not allowed these protective measures because it does not appeal to the client. Prostitutes could get permanently blinded when their clients ejaculate in their eyes, for example, and they're not allowed protective gear for their eyes when the client can see her face or when she's on camera. The clients are not wearing condoms. They're paying people to put themselves in harm's way for their gratification.

Prostitutes are uniquely at risk far more than any other profession for the sole benefit of the client and safer care is just a soothing balm on the conditions of prostitution. With how often they're in contact with human fluids, they would be wearing hazmat suits in any other environment. However, they need to look aesthetically pleasing, so they cannot have illnesses reliably prevented or the risk minimised.

A better bandaid is for their clients to always wear protection and that they need to be screened for illnesses beforehand, as well as leave behind their contact information in case something goes wrong, that is not happening because of privacy laws and because of their preferences as consumers: they want their needs met, not the safety of their "worker." You only need to listen to interviews with sex buyers and with frequent pornography engagement to know this to be true.

The way people describe healthcare in the face of legal prostitution feels too little too late. While well-intended, the truth is that the "workplace" of prostitution is inherently dangerous and no medicine afterwards cannot change the fact that any damage already happened. "Sex worker" are less similar to the working people and more similar to gladiators of whom the majority were slaves who fought, often to death or permanent injury, for the entertainment of the privileged.

Prostitution is not like any other job. If it were, then things like familial relationships would not reveal the contradiction.

Someone, I forget who I'm sorry, already said it better than I can, but if prostitution was the same as any other job, then having your parent, an uncle, your adult child, or a cousin as a client would not be an immediate problem.

It, however, clearly is a problem.

While having a family member as a client in any other field can be uncomfortable, perhaps a bit embarrassing. Your emotions might get in the way of doing the best you can, say, for example, as an attorney or a mortician. However, having a family member as a client in prostitution is inherently different. We know instinctively that sex is intimacy, not a service or any other form of labour, no matter the price tag you place on it.

In sex and sexual acts, you are in a territory of mutual respect and mutual consent. Once the money is on the table, it becomes a negotiation, coercion, you are buying or renting and the product is a human being. It is presenting something to a person to persuade them into being intimate in a way they would otherwise not be willing to do for free.

It is in no way the same as someone not liking their job, how they labour or provide a service in exchange for financial aid. None of those involve intimacy. In fact, while not always perfectly adhered to, sexual harassment is prohibited at work, something women had to advocate for it to be considered an offense at all.

In prostitution, in "sex work," letting sexual harassment happen is "the job."

This also raises questions about the increase of human trafficking and substance abuse in places where prostitution is already legal, such as The Netherlands, Belgium, and Germany. Legalisation has arguably made it more difficult to stop illegal pimps and operations: as long as the prostituted people don't outright endanger themselves by explicitly stating they're trafficked or abused, the government cannot act on suspicions. After all, it is legal. It also makes it easier to trick vulnerable people and children because they're told they're just working. It takes only a few interviews to understand children are groomed this way as well. If clients even care, they too can easily be convinced they're renting or buying a non-trafficked, legal prostitute.

While I agree no prostitute, cam-worker, stripper, or whoever falls under "sex work" should be penalised or criminalised, making the industries legal helps no one.

The Nordic Model ("sex workers" are not targeted by law enforcement but those with whom they do business are) is a far better option. Creating safe and good alternatives for those considering prostitution or "sex work," especially for those escaping the industry, is a far better option.

By advocating for legal "sex work" you may think you are listening to "sex workers," but you are catering to a privileged group within a devastating industry that destroys lives globally. While you think you're being kind, you are silencing the marginalised majority trapped in an industry you don't understand.

The sex industry is incompatible with humanity.

If someone is free to choose "sex work," they are equally free to choose anything else that does not perpetuate harm for those less fortunate than them.

[lunarw0rks]

wait ong imagine something where the reader is loopy from the medicine she took an accidentally tells tf141 she’s in love with them

backstory; you broke your arm slipping on icy pavement. naturally, your first instinct was to call your long-time close friend, who's now your moral support at the clinic.

you're really putting his bedside manner to the test.

୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊ ❀ *ੈ ✩ ‧₊˚

PRICE

in the midst of stroking your hair, waiting for your eyes to flutter open after getting the cast put on.

“see? all better.” he smiles warmly, watching you examine the chunky cast now setting your arm in place.

of course, sluggishly and with sleepy eyes from whatever they have you doped up on.

after a series of tired questions; how long were you out, how bad is the break, etc… you started to sober up a bit — but still sedated and slurring your words.

his fingers continued stroking your hair, moving strands from your face when you’d twitch too much.

“you’ve always been good to me. a good friend… so good to me, john.” you give a loopy smile, cherishing the feeling of his caress. “i think i’m falling in love with you. how crazy is that?”

even in the worst of states, you get the better of him.

price’s blood runs cold, the caress of his hand stopping momentarily. “oh, sweetheart, you won’t remember this tomorrow.” he shakes the confession off, trying his best to maintain his role of moral support.

you’ve made it hard. very hard.

୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊ ❀ *ੈ ✩ ‧₊˚

SIMON

didn't know how to comfort you with words — but got there as fast as he could when you called him. even though he didn't say much, it was obvious you gave him a scare, and he was relieved to find it was just a patch of ice and not internal bleeding.

promised to get you a milkshake after, so that makes up for it.

and with simon, you've learned that's a big step for him. to make promises, and to nurture and spoil.

he wanted to stay in the waiting room, but since you were in pain and pleaded for him to stay, there wasn't much bickering he could do with you. besides, you were drugged up; what could possibly go wrong? ...right?

sat in the chair beside the exam table, he tapped his foot anxiously while the cast was being put on. he didn't say much, but his focus was mainly on you or what the doctor was doing with your injury.

one of the few perks the horrors he'd seen; a broken arm is nothing to squirm about.

the confession happened when you were about to be discharged. after all the paperwork, simon held all your things for you without question, to prevent any strain on the fresh cast.

you wouldn't get up right away. you needed to say something.

"wait, wait..." you shrugged off his hand when he attempted to help you climb off the bed, glossy eyes staring up at him. "thank you. for everything you've put up with. i'm starting to— to see things differently. with us, si."

years and years of tight friendship. could it even be labeled that anymore?

shifted awkwardly for a few moments, unable to keep eye contact when you were so vulnerable. he wasn't in a place or state to unpack his complex feelings for you. "c'mon, love. lean on me." he motioned, allowing you to stumble against him as he led you out.

even though you didn't get a clear answer, there were a hundred things he wanted to say.

୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊ ❀ *ੈ ✩ ‧₊˚

SOAP

he was with you when it happened. a night of hanging out in front of a movie and enjoying takeout. you stepped out to take out the trash and ended up slipping on the ice and landing all your weight on your arm.

you phoned soap, who was still inside your place — completely oblivious to your injury.

already, it wasn't a good ending to an almost seamless night. you were enjoying his company, still stifling feelings like you had been for so long.

and now, sitting in the hospital bed. a scowl on your face while brandishing a new cast. "do ye want me to sign it?" soap asked, half-joking and half-not. you shook your head, getting chills as he placed a gentle rub on your shoulder.

you dizzily sat up on the exam table, handing him your belongings so he could carry them. "i ruined tonight, didn't i?" you asked, despite having no cause for the question.

soap scoffed and chuckled, knowing it was most likely the heavy sedatives talking. "oh, don't be like tha'. it's not a night out without some broken bones." well, he wasn't wrong. nights with him often ended in accidental bruises.

softly, he let your head rest on his shoulder as he walked you past the waiting area, and out to the veranda, where his car was already waiting.

"johnny..." you muttered against his chest, your words garbled from the medications. "i love you."

shaking his head, he opened the passenger door and helped you inside. hovering over you as he buckled you in, you smelled his cologne — the scent you'd learned to crave. "aye, i'm irresistible. but you're off your face."

he brushed it off with humor, but his expression didn't lie. the feeling in his chest didn't lie.

୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊ ❀ *ੈ ✩ ‧₊˚

GAZ

determined to stay in the room with you while they put the cast on, in case you wanted to hold his hand. even though you wouldn't feel any of it, seeing you in agony on the drive there was enough.

when the nurses finished, leaving you with an inconvenient sling and cast, he did his best to lend you support. "i broke my wrist once, during gymnastics. think you can top that?" gaz spoke to distract you, probably fluffing the details of the embarrassing juvenile memory.

your senses were foggy and sluggish, but you were lucid enough to speak. and the sedatives gave you an inkling of confidence to confess, which you otherwise wouldn't have.

your uninjured hand clutched his, playing with his fingers and giving them a gentle squeeze, "i think we should be more than friends. i mean... you're always with me, i'm always with you. it just... makes more sense." you murmured nonchalantly, as if not dropping a major bomb.

his natural reaction was to shake his head and smile, despite a flood of nerves arising at the confession. whether he felt the same or not—and he did—he couldn't admit it like this.

with you, halfway lucid and in a sterile environment. it wasn't right.

gaz did his best to change the subject, sure to try not to bring this up tomorrow, "how about we get out of here first? let me set you up at home and then... we'll go from there."

୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊ ❀ *ੈ ✩ ‧₊˚

[neomujinjja]

Come Back Safe

Pairing: Park Chanyoung x reader

Length: 885 words Genre: imagine, reunion, fluff(?)

Warnings: not edited, pre sweet home events, reference to enlistment, vague mention of celebrity treatment during enlistment, mentions of guns, cursing, crying

Synopsis: You and your boyfriend were only supposed to part for a little while for his enlistment. But with the outbreak, you're not even sure of his status. And yet, the world works in mysterious ways.

Note: Because it felt too soon/too close to home to write this for woodz. But hey! sweet home 💃; also jinyoung is insane in the left picture 😵‍💫. I don't know when Chanyoung is said to be enlisted but I assumed it would be some months before the events of Sweet Home S1 happen.

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

"Are you sure you're okay with waiting for me?" Chanyoung asked as he set his bags down. The two of you had just became exclusive; you had been on dates with one another but only decided on your relationship recently.

"Yes, you just focus on getting back to me safely" you told him with a nod and smile. You were scared for him, that he'd be treated badly due to his celebrity status or become hurt at some point during his enlistment. Chanyoung hummed before pulling you into a hug.

"I will be. Promise me that you'll keep yourself safe as well" he said before pecking whatever he could reach. You hit him on the shoulder and laughed.

"What the worse that could happen to me in the civilian world?"

"Just promise me. It'll make me feel at ease."

"Okay. I promise~" You pulled away to place your pinky finger between you. The baseball star snickered as he interlocked his into yours. He pressed a kiss onto your lips with a smile.

"Seal it with a kiss" Chanyoung whispered before pulling entirely away from you. You stood in a slight stupor at his actions, that was insanely smooth. You complained at him, explaining he shouldn't tease you before leaving for roughly two years. The enlisted male only laughed, playfully grabbing your hands to fight you off. The two of you struggling against the other whilst your stomaches began to ache from the fits of laughter. Chanyoung relaxed his arms, allowing you to lean in close to his chest, the two of you successfully out of breath. "Okay, I've really got to get going" he panted as he released your arms and sat to put his boots on properly. You watched as he did so, continuing until he had all of his bags gathered up and was opening the door.

"Be safe, I mean it" you told him, leaning onto the door frame. You knew that it was just bad timing and there was nothing you could do, but you wished you didn't have to be separated from your boyfriend so early on. Chanyoung saluted with a smile before blowing a kiss and heading down your apartment complex hallway. The two of you decided that it'd be best for you not to send him off at the gate to avoid dealing with the news tabloids; meaning this would be the last time you'd see him until his break or a visit.

-

'Shit!' you cursed in your mind. You had thought that moving early in the morning would prevent you from meeting others. You were especially trying to avoid soldiers, the civilians were bad enough, you didn't need to deal with people with gun access. Hiding behind a pillar, you thought about what your next move would be. The sound of voices caught your attention, you whipped your head in the direction it came from. Listening in to their conversation, you let out a sigh of relief at the their addressing. Watching the two males on the balcony, you decided to head inside the building anyway; any medicine you could get your hands on would do some good in the long run making it worth the risk.

~

'Fuck' you cursed in your head once again. You hadn't seen the tray behind you; and of course, your elbow bumped it causing it to crash to the floor. You turned your head in the door's direction, praying silently that no one would come to check it out. Though it would be a death sentence to not a noise out in recent events.

"I thought the building was empty?" a female voice asked.

"I'm not sure. Stay here, I'll check" a male voice responded. You heard the female scoff at his words but she didn't make anymore verbal protest. The room you managed to sneak and ransack was barren of any hiding spots. Running a hand through your hair, you closed your eyes with no choice but to accept whatever fate that came. "Who are you?" the male asked.

"Human" was the only thing you said as you opened your eyes again. You were left shocked by the person standing in the doorway. Standing there was Chanyoung pointing a weapon in your face. Your boyfriend was alive, seemingly safe and sound, with a gun trained on you.

"Y/N?"

"Chanyoung?"

The two of you spoke at the same time. The former baseball player lowered his weapon, staring at your figure in similar shock.

"Where have you been this whole time?" Chanyoung exclaimed as he practically threw the gun to the side. You said nothing as he strides closer to you. "Are you okay? Have you been safe?" the male asked. Chanyoung grabbed you, checking over what he could see for any visible injuries. He pulled you into a hug when he didn't find any, his right hand caressing your hair. You brought your hands up, lightly setting them onto the male's lower back. You began shaking as you released tears, one's of relief and frustration. "What's wrong?" Chanyoung panicked as he tried to pull away but you held onto his clothing.

"You're safe. You came back safe, you kept our promise" you whispered in between your sniffles. You ignored your boyfriend's coos as you buried yourself deeper into his arms.

[hyunniesgirl]

Call it what you want

Pairing: Hyunjin x fem!reader

Summary: You and Hyunjin were never on the best terms but when you're cheated on and your ex is trying to get you back, Hyunjin does everything he can to prevent it from happening.

Genre: enemies(ish) to lovers, smut, fluff

Words count: 4,102

Warnings for this chapter: cheating, mentions of violence, insecure thoughts(if there's anything missing let me know)

A/N: english is not my first language so if you find any mistakes please let me know.

Chapter one: shameless

Next chapter: drunk

+18 minors do not interact!!!

That week was the worst since you started college. Everything was going wrong. You had bombed on your last exam, forgot a project due to that week and to top it off you were on your period with cramps that could surely kill you.

You're used to these symptoms by now, sometimes you even faint from the pain. So a day before your best friend's birthday party you let all your friends and your boyfriend know that you won't be able to show up.

Turns out that after you rested a lot and took some really strong meds you are well enough to get up. The truth is that even though you are still feeling weak and nauseous, you will make some extra effort because it's Jisung's birthday.

You don't bother dressing up, all you care is to be comfortable so a hood and sweats are enough.

When you arrived, the party was already crowded. Jisung's house is huge so to be bustling with people like this he must have invited half of the people in school.

"Hey! What are you doing here?", you hear Chan's voice as soon as you enter the door.

"Am I not welcome?", you joke, giving him a hug and he smiles.

"Of course you are, I just thought you were sick", he says, examining you to see if you're alright.

"I am, but I took some meds so I could come", you say looking around, trying to find the birthday boy.

Before Chan could answer you, someone catches his attention, you look up his shoulder and see Hyunjin, one of your friend's friends, he looks at you up and down and raises an eyebrow.

"Y/L/N"

You roll your eyes, "Hwang"

He whispers something to Chan, but you're not interested nor well enough to pick a fight with him at the moment, so you say bye to Chan and go looking for Jisung.

You don't find him anywhere downstairs so you go look on the second floor, maybe he's in his room. Before opening the door you take a deep breath preparing mentally, if he is hooking up with someone you'll just congratulate him later.

He's not there though. You take your phone out of your pocket and send him a message asking about his whereabouts. You begin wandering around, expecting his response and looking in the other rooms to see if you can find him or anyone else you know.

And you do find someone.

Your boyfriend.

Your dear boyfriend on top of a girl you don't know.

Never in a million years would you have expected your boyfriend to cheat on you, so it was pretty shocking when you saw him in that situation.

"Are you fucking kidding me?", that's the only thing you were able to say, to convey your feelings, there's a lot running through your mind at the moment: confusion, hurt, disgust, anger.

You say it loud enough for them and the people in the corridor to listen.

"Y-Y/N?", he stammers looking like he is seeing a ghost.

Your mind is flowing with so many thoughts you can't process it, the only thing you know is that you need proof so he or anyone won't be able to gaslighting you in thinking you saw it wrong.

You have your phone in your hand, so you open the camera and take a picture. He's still there paralyzed. Is it fear? Embarrassment? Does he not care enough to try and explain himself?

You are not thinking straight but you have to get out of there. You need to.

You're feeling dizzy, suddenly the medicine you took lost all effect and you are feeling sick again. Your blood is boiling and you want to cry, but you can't, not in front of so many people.

Soon as you are downstairs you begin to see double and your steps begin to falter, you try with all your mighty to walk straight. But when everything turns black and you feel your legs giving out, you can't feel the ground when you fall.

When you regain consciousness you're inside of a car and to your surprise you see Hyunjin there, looking at you with the most worried face you have ever seen on him. When he sees you blinking and opening your eyes his uninterested look comes back as if the worry from before was never there.

"Where are we?", you ask, not thinking too much about it, putting your hand on your head. Now you have a headache too.

"In front of your house", he says and you look outside checking that you can see the wood fence with flowers from the vertical garden you planted under the balcony of your room last year.

"What happened?"

"You fainted in the middle of the party", he answers looking at the street.

"And why are you here?", you try to understand, very confused as to why would he, of all people, do that?

Hyunjin doesn't like you, you don't know why and you usually don't mind because you don't like him either. Something about him brings a bitter taste to your mouth, you're not sure of what.

Maybe it's that air about him, always full of himself, always looking utterly uninterested. Or maybe the fact that he plays with girls left and right makes you uncomfortable.

You even had a crush on him at some point, before you faced reality: you wouldn't be more than one of his conquests, so you stayed aside and your feelings began to subside with time.

"I was going home already and the guys asked me to bring you"

He doesn't look at you and that bothers you more than you are willing to admit. "They didn't come because they were taking care of your boyfriend", he says, clearing his throat, looking awkward.

"Ex"

"What?", his eyes meet yours too quickly making you turn away to avoid his gaze.

"It's ex boyfriend", you answer fidgeting with your fingers.

Of course you didn't break up with him yet but surely no one would hold that against you when he is the one who cheated.

The events of the night suddenly come crashing at you, you feel the tears brimming, so you open the car door getting out the faster you can.

You can't let Hyunjin see you cry, not him or anyone. Not because of that disgusting prick.

"Thanks for the ride, next time I see you coffee's on me", not turning to look at him you walk towards your house.

After getting to the safety of your room you can let your tears run freely. Why would Eric do that? Things were okay between you too, you always tried to be the best girlfriend possible to him, so why?

The pain you feel in your chest makes you feel like you can't breathe, your head is spinning and you just fall to your knees, sitting right there on the floor with not much strength to go to your bed.

You thought he loved you. Is love supposed to feel like this?

You take your phone out of your pocket and see it going off with messages from your friends. You open the group chat:

Chan: Y/N are you alright?

Minho: you shouldn't have come, you were feeling ill all day.

Felix: you were already sick, that asshole just made it worse.

Yeji: do you want us to come over?

Jisung: answer us when you wake up, please.

Ryujin: we already gave him a good beating but just say the word and we can do it again.

Innie: we're worried sick so please don't isolate yourself.

You close your eyes, you have to answer so they won't show up at your house because you know they will if you don't give them a sign that you're alive.

You: hey guys I'm alright, I just really need to sleep my cramps are killing me.

You didn't want to worry them, you knew they would do anything for you and that's enough. You didn't want your friends throwing a pity party because you were cheated on.

You force yourself to move, going to the bathroom and starting the hot water. Slowly you take your clothes off and enter the tub sitting there hugging your legs and thinking about every moment of your relationship, trying to think where it went wrong, did you do something? Did you miss any signs of him being disinterested or anything that could explain his behavior?

You know it's not your fault, of course it isn't. If he thought something was wrong he could have talked with you, if he didn't like you anymore he could break up, why would he break your trust like that?

It all comes back to the same question: why?

After at least 40 minutes you finish showering and get out of the bathroom, drying your hair and wrapping yourself in the fluffiest bathrobe you could find. You make yourself comfortable on the bed and try to get some sleep, at least in your dreams the pain would go away.

•••

You wake up feeling like you were run over by a train and that's because you didn't sleep at all. You woke up half a dozen times and everytime you would feel a moment of peace before your brain remembered what happened, those precious seconds where you felt like everything was okay and then you were miserable again. That's when you started crying again, falling asleep again only when exhaustion took over.

And that same thing repeated itself over and over till it was morning and you just couldn't sleep anymore.

Being sunday you don't have much to distract yourself from your thoughts. You look at the time, it's only seven in the morning.You do all the homework and projects you can think of, even the ones that are due in two months and when you look again it's not even afternoon yet.

You turn on your phone, you had turned it off because even though your friends had asked you not to, all you wanted to do right now was to isolate yourself.

Babe: can we talk?

Babe: I swear I can explain.

You scoff, changing his name. Tears come back to your eyes and the aching pain on your chest becomes stronger.

Jerk: babe, please.

You: fuck off.

Blockcontact

Does he really think he can talk his way out of this situation? You could maybe be tricked if someone had told you about what happened but you saw it with your own eyes, him all over her.

You take a deep breath trying to calm yourself.

You see that some of your friends sent you messages too:

Chaeryeong: heyy? How are you?

Chaeryeong: wanna go shopping? It always lifts your mood.

Chan: if you want to talk, we're here, okay?

There were a lot of similar messages sent by your other friends but you answered them all saying you're okay.

•••

You stare at your reflection in the mirror. Your eyebags are huge and even after putting makeup on it didn't help much. It seems like two nights without sleep are difficult to hide.

So you get dressed and try to look your best, you wouldn't let anyone think you're having a hard time.

You hear the sound of your doorbell, which is weird since it's too early for the mailman to be delivering your correspondence and you're not expecting anyone.

You open the door and find Chan and Felix arguing about something, they stop fighting and look at you when they see you there.

"Good morning", Chan says, giving you a kiss on the cheek.

"Good morning, what are you doing here?"

"We thought it would be nice to have breakfast together and give you a ride after", Felix answers, lifting the box full of doughnuts in his hands.

They were worried, you could see in their eyes even though they were keeping a smile on their face. You should have known that just saying you were alright wouldn't reassure them.

You take a step out of the house, closing the door.

"Let's pick up some coffee then, my treat", you say, walking past them, stopping outside of Chan's car. "The front seat is mine", you say to Felix.

"Fine", he answers pouting.

After getting your well needed coffee, you three eat in the car in the college parking lot. You see Chan and Felix exchanging looks, surely arguing silently about who's going to ask how you're doing.

"Could you guys please stop?", you ask and both look at you like they were caught doing something they are not supposed to.

"What are you talking about?", Felix asks, clearing his throat.

"About the elephant in the room", you smile sadly finishing your coffee. "I'm going to be fine, okay? It's not the end of the world"

It's not your first break up, you know the pain will pass and then you'll remember about it and feel nothing. But for now, knowing that doesn't make it hurt less.

Chan sighs.

"Just tell us if you're having a hard time", he says, "even if you don't want to, talk to us"

You nod, you really do want their support.

"Let's go to class, okay? Our marketing project won't finish itself"

They smile painfully, we hate this class.

•••

It's awkward to be looking for Hyunjin. You got him an Iced Americano to pay up for the ride like you promised.

He's in the art studio looking really focused while painting something, so you don't know if it's okay to interrupt him.

When you enter the room, the door closes after you with a huge noise making him look in your direction.

He stands up too quickly, splashing the paint he has on his hand directly on his upper body, thankfully he's wearing an apron so it doesn't stain his clothes.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to surprise you", you say, getting closer.

He gives you a kind smile you didn't expect, "It's okay"

"I just wanted to give you this", you shake the cup in your hand offering it to him, he frowns while taking the drink. "That night I told you coffee would be on me next time, so here it is", you remember him.

"Thanks, you didn't have to", he sips the drink anyway.

"I did", you clear your throat, why are you so nervous? Maybe it's stressful to be nice to him. "You were kind enough to take me home and wait till I woke up, this is the least I can do"

He gives you a smile, sitting on the table next to the easel he was painting on. He keeps staring at you without saying a thing and that does nothing to ease your nerves making you squeeze the straps of your bag.

I should get going, you're ready to say.

"I hope we can be more than just acquaintances", he says finishing his drink.

You almost choke on the air you just inhaled.

"How so?"

He smiles, that pretentious smile you hate so much.

"We have a lot of friends in common, I think it's time to end this animosity between us.

"Should I remind you that you were the one that didn't like me first?", you point it out. It's really funny for him to say those things when he's the one that started this whole thing.

"I never disliked you, you were the one that scoffed at me and rolled your eyes everytime I said anything"

You're offended now, does he want to pretend he's innocent?

"Excuse me? When I had just started hanging out with the guys you were the one that always kept staring at me so intensely I was sure you wanted to kill me", you cross your arms, "I'm really good at taking a cue, I knew you didn't want me there so I just did you a favor and avoided you"

He smiles amused, making you even madder.

"I suppose you're not as good as you think then", he answers.

You roll your eyes, you're not giving him the pleasure of asking to elaborate.

"Anyway, I have class", you turn going to the door.

"What about my request?", he asks before you can reach the handle.

"I'll think about it", you say halfheartedly, you probably won't.

•••

The week went by without much bigger events, you cried in the college bathroom sometimes, then called one of your friends and you went to eat something. You are really grateful that everyone made time for you, they never left you alone so you were always laughing and having fun even though your heart still aches.

On saturday night there was a party in one of the campus frat houses, your friends made sure to invite you and convince you to go.

You were not in the best mood, but you wanted to be strong to show everyone and yourself that Eric didn't affect you.

Waiting for all your friends to get ready was no easy feat, so when you arrived at the party two hours after it started, the house was already crowded.

There were people throwing up, hooking up, jumping in the pool and you could swear you saw someone running... without clothes.

"Want to play truth or dare?", Yeji askes sliding her arm around your shoulder.

You really don't, but you don't want to be a bore.

"Sure", you say, following her to the second floor where you find at least 20 people, including Eric.

Yeji's eyes grow wide.

"Hey, who invited him?", she angrily asks a girl and she shrugs too drunk to even speak a complete sentence.

"I told them to not invite him, I'm sorry", she says anxiously, "we don't have to play, we can go downstairs and dance?"

You wanted to get away from there, you really didn't want to face him. But at the same time you didn't want to run away, he did wrong so he should be the one leaving.

"It's ok, let's play", you say walking towards the circle of people and sitting where there was space for two.

That week you found out that someone filmed Ryujin and Changbin beating the shit out of Eric after you left the party and that made you feel pretty satisfied, knowing someone got your back.

You felt Eric's eyes on you, you knew he wouldn't try anything with your friends close. But he sure could make you uncomfortable by staring.

The game begins, they explain the rules and where it's okay to go with the dares. The bottle is spinning.

You always thought truth or dare is just an excuse for people to make out with someone they want without being rejected.

The guys that weren't playing and are just lurking are serving drinks, so you take a shot of tequila hoping the alcohol will help you relax.

The bottle stops, pointing at you.

"Truth or dare?", they ask you.

"Dare, I guess?", it's obvious that if you answer "truth" they're going to ask why you and Eric broke up and you're not feeling in the mood to tell everyone what happened. They sigh disappointed, people are going to find out eventually but you're not ready to be the one to spread the news.

One of them smiles mischievously and whispers something to the person who's going to give you the dare.

"Seven minutes in heaven with Hwang Hyunjin", they say.

Well, that's better than having to answer a painful truth. You're used to Hyunjin, he's always with your friends so it won't be difficult.You really didn't think much about his request so you're hoping he won't bring it up now.

You two walk into the closet hearing people continuing the game after you close the door.

"How are you?", he asks after some time.

You can't see his face and wonder if he has that same worried expression he had in his car after the whole thing with Eric.

"I'm good", you say. You felt much better in that enclosed place than out there with so many eyes watching. You hear Hyunjin rustling, he's moving closer. He puts his hand on your arm and you flinch.

"Sorry, it's just weird talking without knowing where you are"

You nod even though he can't see you, "it's okay"

It's even more weird for them to talk for more than a minute without starting a fight. Suddenly you have a very bad idea.

"Can you do me a favor?", you're not sure if it's the alcohol kicking in or just you being dumb, maybe both.

"What's it?"

"Can you kiss me?", you say embarrassed, regretting it the moment it leaves your mouth, "you don't have to, it's just... I want to hurt him", you explain.

Hyunjin doesn't say a thing so you're sure he's just going to ignore your request. Then, you feel his fingers sliding up your arms and arriving at your neck soon after he cups your face caressing your cheeks.

You can feel his breathing so close it's inebriating.

"Can I?", he asks for permission even though you were the one who asked him to do it. He probably is giving you a chance to take it back, but you don't want to.

You won't admit it but in that moment you didn't care about your ex, all you cared about was how every place Hyunjin touched was burning and how his warm breath mixed with yours.

You nod again, humming with your eyes already closed. When his lips touch yours it's an explosion of sensations: his lips, his touch, his scent, everything about him is warm. You have to wrap your arms around his neck for some support, because your legs are giving out and his hair feels so good through your fingers you could die. You were feeling that ache sensation in your lower stomach and you knew you had to stop, you couldn't feel that way about him.

The door opens suddenly and you're forced to let go of each other, everyone is watching and they are shocked to say the least, of course, everyone knew about your ongoing feud so they sent you two there to see how long you could last until one of you killed the other.

You finally remember why you asked Hyunjin to kiss you when you see Eric's face, he's angry and hurt. And that's what you were going for but why do you feel so bad? When you look back to Hyunjin he's avoiding your gaze, his lips full of your red lipstick.

Should you talk to him? Should you thank him for the help? Should you tell him that was the best kiss you ever had? You can't say a thing because you're too shocked to even think straight, so you just sit again ignoring Yeji's wide eyes.

You stay there for another 30 minutes before saying goodbye to everyone and leaving the room. Hyunjin is not there anymore, you didn't see when he left, too immersed in your own thoughts to pay attention to anything else.

After leaving Yeji there playing, you go downstairs. Maybe a drink will help you feel better.

Eric didn't try talking to you with your friend there but you don't know if he's going to try when you're alone so it's best to find someone you know.

You get to the first floor, going to the drink's table, you are sure one of your friends is going to be there and you do find Felix talking to a girl you're almost sure is a freshman. You don't want to interrupt his flirting so you just lurk around him tasting some mix of drinks.

You see Chaeryeong across the room, you wave seeing her smiling to you. You down the drink you have in your hands and grab a bottle of water hoping your hangover is not going to be that bad. You go in Chaeryeong direction when you see Hyunjin next to her, he's kissing someone and you can't help stopping in your tracks.

What did you expect? That he would fall for you after a kiss? Of course not and you didn't want that too. You're not sure why you feel so shocked, you just didn't think he would be all over another person right after kissing you. But that's exactly why you don't like him, right? Because he's a player.

He was just doing you a favor, you should thank him at the right moment and that's the end of where your relationship goes.

[slushycoookie]

Shaving His Hair

Relationship: Miguel O'Hara x GN! Reader

Word Count: 776

Content: Fluff, lice, Miguel's curls are gone and he's bald! (No not really)

Summary: After an unexpected lice outbreak, you have to cut Miguel’s hair.

A/N: Miguel when his hair is shaved is hot as hell, I don't care what anyone says. Also this one is kinda connected to the washing his hair post I did so if you wanted to read that too, here.

There was a lice outbreak in HQ.

You would think a bunch of superheroes could combat a bunch of little bugs but no.

Miguel ordered anyone who had said lice to get it taken care of in their dimension. Or go to the infirmary for treatment. The leader of Spider Society thought he was safe. Trying to avoid anyone who had potential contact with someone with lice. He was wrong. That’s why you two were in the bathroom. His head was in his hands as he sat on the toilet while you laid out the required tools. All set up like you were about to conduct surgery.

“This was your idea.” You reminded him while putting on rubber gloves. “The doctor said we could try the treatment and see what happens. You don't have to cut it.”

Miguel’s head shook, not wanting to look at what was about to happen. “The doctor said my case was more serious. It's best to cut it all off.” You were about to argue some more. Try to get him to see reason. But he stared at you with large eyes, knowing what he had to do despite not liking the decision. “It's my hair.”

He was right. 

You wanted to support him, reassure him you were always going to be on his side. So you got the clippers ready. You weren't a professional but you knew how to cut hair. You surfed the internet to look up tips to make sure it wasn't uneven. Miguel wanted to get everything over with but you were determined to make his hair look nice.

The buzz from the clipper filled the bathroom. You started from the front, placing his head back to get a good view. The device hovered over his hairline as you wanted to give him one more chance.

“Are you sure you wanna do this?”

“Yes.” Miguel huffed, “I'm not changing my mind.”

“Alright, alright. Just checking.”

You ran the blade towards you, chunks of hair falling off and hitting the ground. Bye bye curls. Your eyes couldn't help but go wide at the fact you could see his head. Now you were picturing how he would look shaved. With that sharp jawline and high cheekbones. Miguel was going to be attractive regardless of his hairstyle.

“Any day now…”

You stuck your tongue out at him before continuing. Dragging the clipper down his head. Locks cascading down on his covered shoulders. You did your best to get all the extra hair you could, making sure he didn't look a hot mess. 

Once you were done, it was time to wash it. You suggested doing it at the kitchen sink as you didn't feel like going in the shower.

“Really? We're doing this in the kitchen?” He asked.

“Don’t worry. I already cleaned it.” You pointed down to get him to bend over. Thank goodness for stools as you stood on it to get a good angle. The shampoo for lice had a minty scent. Almost medicinal when you rubbed your fingers along his scalp. The scent was strong enough to bring tears to your eyes. You hoped your partner wasn't having a worse time due to his enhanced senses.

“How you doing?” 

Miguel grunted and you couldn't help but snort. “I'm fine.”

“At least one of us is.” You blinked repeatedly to get yourself together before rinsing him off. As much as you weren't a fan of the shampoo, you wanted to be thorough. Much to yourself and apparently his chagrin, you did another wash. It was better the second time around, your eyes getting itself together this time. There weren't any complaints from Miguel either. 

With the lice vanquished and the prevention solution working, you dried him off with a towel. You grabbed the mirror from the bathroom and held it up to his face to see what you did. Miguel examined himself. Head tilting from side to side while trying to see how he looked. 

“My head…it's so…square looking.”

You snickered, “It's a very handsome square look.”

Miguel playfully glared at you, “So you agree? That I'm square?”

“When you wear those glasses, yeah.” He pulled you in for a hug, not tolerating your teasing. “Okay, okay! I'm joking, you actually look pretty handsome.”

He held up the mirror once more. Seeing yourself and him in the reflection. “I do?”

“Yes. My handsome baby.” You peppered his face with kisses. The medicinal scent from the shampoo still lingering. “Oh by the way, you should find the person who started that outbreak. So this doesn't happen again.”

Miguel pursed his lips, having the same thought. “Yeah, good idea.”

[youbutstupid]

What are the flaws of each Criminal Minds character? Because these things I glossed over while watching the show. Unleash the essay, if you have to!

I’m gonna fight someone, I wrote a response to this but my app refreshed! Time to speedrun this response again omg I’m so sorry.

DISCLAIMER: I love every single character but that doesn’t mean I am blind to the fact that they are all flawed and fleshed out human beings.

Gideon: he was unempathetic to those he worked with. He was incredibly kind and compassionate to the victims and even the unsubs at times, but the only time we saw him truly give value as a superior was to Reid and Garcia, and even they got the short end of the stick at times.

Hotch: he unfortunately paid the price for his, but it was a lack of empathy for Haley and the fact that she never signed up for marrying an FBI agent. He let his job cloud the fact that he should have been prioritising his son and wife and he sadly didn’t realise this until the divorce papers were finalised.

Reid: he is very emotional, which is mostly a good thing, but it does mean that he can let it cloud what he is supposed to do in a situation and what is right, leading to irrational actions, as seen in Fisher King pt 2, Elephant’s Memory, Memorium and his journey in Mexico. I’m not saying his arrest was his fault of course, but I am saying that whether he got framed or not, there were other risks to crossing the border without notifying the FBI to collect experimental medicine, and his emotions clouded him from those risks. It puts his team in tricky positions and also puts his life in danger.

Morgan: he was very doubtful towards people’s views and ideas. If I had a shot for every time he doubted a true thing that somebody said or said that they shouldn’t be working a case when they should be, I would be so blackout drunk. Obviously he is allowed to doubt things, but he takes it too far and it prevents him from seeing what is right in front of him.

Elle: I understand that she needed somebody to blame in order to rationalise her trauma and the person who caused it was dead, but she was wrong to blame Hotch and she never went back on it. Hotch sent her home with the idea that Anderson would be watching over her, he could never have predicted that Anderson would leave her alone or that Gideon would anger Garner.

JJ: love her but the Reid confession was icky and gross. She had other 35 years of experience in life, came from a small town background, covered up Prentiss’ death and was a part of classified missions overseas and you’re telling me the only secret she could think to tell was telling the guy who used to have a crush on her that she was in love with him whilst she had a husband and two sons? I like to pretend this never happened for my own sanity.

Garcia: she is also very emotional, which can be a good thing most of the time, but other times it leads to her making decisions without considering their consequences. One example is her visiting the man who tried to murder Reid because she personally felt bad; I adore her but she didn’t consider that her motives were selfish because she just wanted closure, she didn’t consider if this could have been triggering to Reid, the people he had murdered or even if the man wanted to see her at all. There are also times when she wastes time by refusing to look things up because she feels weird doing it, even though there are lives on the line.

Prentiss: the line ‘you mourned the loss of one friend, I mourned the loss of six.’ Surely she realised that carrying what you thought was your best friend’s dead body in a coffin whilst thinking that she was wiped out of existence forever is very different than being in France and missing your friends but knowing that they are very much alive.

Rossi: he often tries to justify his crappy actions in the past when he should just apologise. Even if he has to apologise multiple times, it is no one’s jobs to understand his actions that hurt other people, it is his job to rectify them however that may be. I’m glad he has changed and grown, but that doesn’t undo the hurt that he has caused.

Todd: she had every reason not to fully trust the team because she doesn’t know them, but she needed to at least trust that they could do their jobs and do them well. I understand that she had never been in that line of work before, but she was not open to understanding either and that put her in tricky positions.

Seaver: I think she came to the bau with the hope of finding closure for her past and that meant that she was not 100% sure what it actually was that she was signing up for, leading to her often falling behind as an agent. She tried to learn, but she was just too unprepared for what it entailed.

Blake: I love her but the whole thing in the earlier episodes of her telling Reid that she’s glad he didn’t take her joke about him being autistic too seriously because apparently no one can take a joke these days made me feel icky. Even if Reid did take her joke seriously, it is no one’s responsibility to find your offensive jokes funny, it is your responsibility not to make them.

Callahan: like Morgan, she was often sceptical about things and whilst, again, she has every right to be, it did mean that sometimes she was clouded to some truths because she simply couldn’t see them.

Tara: she immediately assumed that the reason her brother didn’t go to college was simply because he had gone off the rails and was the less successful sibling. Her straight A student brother suddenly dropped out of education and she didn’t stop to see if he was okay or suffering in any way for him to have done this in the first place. She of course had no obligation to help him once he had started asking for financial help and making bad decisions, but she could have at least wondered why all of this started. I think her dad was largely to blame for this though.

Alvez: he was not ready to have and then move in with his girlfriend when he did. He was still quite new to his job and way too committed with it, plus it was clear from the beginning that he had some feelings towards Penelope and he just didn’t seem to have the emotional availability at the time for Lisa. I know she didn’t break up with him for this reason, but I think that they needed to break up anyway as it kind of felt like she was being led on.

Simmons: adore him but what a field of work to be in with five kids. I’m glad his wife was understanding because idk how I would cope raising five kids whilst my husband was constantly away; this isn’t necessarily a flaw but rather a personal ick for me.

Walker: idk he’s just a little fella innit

[one-idea]

Nika cult part 2

Part 1

The worst part, is that Nika, no matter how much he looks or sounds like him, is not Luffy.

As much as the crew might complain(fondly) about Luffy’s boundless energy, Luffy does know how to be still. Not the way you might think, he can’t sit for hours or even minutes unmoving, but he knows how and when to be present with his crew.

There are days when Sanji needs company in the kitchen. When his thoughts get to loud. When he remembers his childhood and his siblings. When he remembers whole cake Island and all his crew gave up for him. when he feels useless or worthless.

Luffy comes and sits with him and asks about what food he’s making or just starts talking about anything and nothing. On really bad days he will ask Sanji about the All Blue and just listen to his chef tell him about his dream.

There are days when Arlong hangs heavy over Nami. Days where drawling maps hurt her hands, days when saving one berri feels like the difference between life and death. And Luffy just places his hat of her head and tells her about how he and Ace used to dine and dash or how they found treasure to save up for their adventures out at sea. And most of the stories are silly and make Nami smile but they all have the undertone of, ‘it’s okay, I’ve been with out money before we don’t need it to survive, you’re doing a great job taking care of us.’

And Nami knows her captain and crew come from ruff backgrounds, none of them are used to fortune and the luxuries that money can buy. And maybe that’s one of the reasons she’s still so obsessed with money. Yes she likes money. But before it was to free Cocoyashi. And now it to provide for her crew and her family. But it’s nice to have Luffy remind her it’s not necessary.

There are days when Usopp doesn’t believe he belongs on the crew. Not after his behavior on Water 7, not with how weak he still is compared to the others. He will lock himself in his work shop and try and find ways to improve his weaponry, or Nami’s clima-tact. He will work until his hands are raw, until he’s falling asleep at his table.

Or he will if Luffy doesn’t interrupt him. Luffy barrels through the door demanding Usopp’s attention. Sometimes it’s to go and play games, sometimes it’s fishing, and others it’s to fawn over whatever invention Usopp’s made. But it always ends with the two friends laughing and Usopp feeling at home once again.

There are days Chopper can’t stop working. Days when Dr. Hiriluk’s death and his own part in it hang to close to the surface of his mind. Days when he can’t stop making medicine because what if they don’t have what they need the next time someone’s sick? Or what if he gives them the wrong thing? What if his crew mates end up like Dr Hiriluk!?

Luffy will come in and sit with the little doctor. Asking after all the different medicine bottles and what Chopper is doing. Always following up with how Chopper is the best doctor (after all he is the strawhat doctor) and he keeps this going until Chopper is all happy again doing his little dances and calling Luffy a jerk for making him so happy

There are days when Robin can’t believe this is real. That this is her life. That she has friends who would risk everything to save her, who she would risk everything to save. It feels like a dream to not be alone anymore.

And on these days Luffy will come sit next to her and ask her to read to him. Whatever she’s reading that day will become their adventure for the afternoon. Robin loves sharing her books with him and Luffy loves the calming sound of her voice even if the tales go over his head sometimes.

There are days when Franky can’t work on the Sunny. He loves the Sunny and he’s so proud of her. But there are days when he remembers what happened to Tom. How his ships were turned against the people he loves. And he can’t let that happen again. But how does he prevent that. How does he build new weapons for his crew if they could be turned around and used against them? There are days he just sits in his work shop with his head in his hands wondering what the right thing to do is.

Until there his captain, sunshine personified bounces is and starts asking about all of his inventions and plans and it’s so easy to get lost in his captains excitement.

There are days when Brook forgets this is real. When he thinks if he closes his eyes (if he had eyes! Yohohoh skull joke!) then the whole crew will disappear and he will be alone again. The days where he sits in silence or with a sad melody playing on his violin.

Until Luffy sits down next to him leaning into his side, which can’t be comfortable for his captain but Luffy acts like it’s the most comfortable place on the ship and asks his musician to play him something. And the two get lost singing silly songs together until Brook forgets the haunting feeling of being alone.

There are days when Jinbei gets lost in the injustice of the world. Of his people. Of how he wants the world to change but will he ever be enough?

Until his rubber band of a captain slams into him and reminds him with a smile that the world is already changing. Jinbei is a member of the strawhat pirates now and if anyone can help make his dream come true it’s this ball is sunshine he gets to call captain

Zoro is different. Zoro has bad days. Days where he feels he isn’t strong enough so he train until he can’t. Days are also where he sees the scar on Luffy’s chest and is reminded of his failures as a first mate and vows to never fail again. Yet there are other days when the memory of Kuina floats over him and even this many years later her absence still makes him sad.

On the first day Luffy can find his first mate over training and a quickly bait him into sparing with him. Zoro gets lost in it. Theres nothing g better than sparing with his captain. No one fights quite like Luffy. Though the rest of the crew quickly makes then stop because they are rocking the boat. On the second and third type of day though Luffy can normally find his first mate napping on the deck. It’s not out of the ordinary to find Zoro napping, but Luffy just seems to know when Zoro needs company. The second and third days will often find Zoro and Luffy curled together supporting one another even in their sleep.

The crew doesn’t know how Luffy knows about their bad days. He’s always been weirdly emotionally intelligent. They don’t have to know it comes from years of watching Ace battle with depression and self esteem issues. That Luffy has trained himself to pick up on people’s subtle ques for when they need support. Two the crew it’s just part of what makes Luffy Luffy.

Which is why Nika is so jarring to the crew. He has Luffy’s face and voice but not his ability to read the crew. Where Luffy knew how to sit with his crew and be with them Nika is no stop motion. He can’t read the crews needs the way Luffy can. Nika is focused of the drive of freedom and finding away to get Luffy back.

The crew can at least agree to focus on the second goal. They want their captain back. There was so much about him that they didn’t recognize, that they took for granted and now that it’s gone they will do anything to get him back.

[theshipden]

How would the main 6 react to finding out Mc has ptsd?

Cracks knuckles oh baby as someone with C-PTSD this is my JAM

Julien;

He listens to your explanation, never breaking eye contact. He understands, he’s a doctor, he talks you through it

When you’re having an attack, he’s quick to ground you and help you seek a good therapist

Protective asf, he will not let you do anything alone since it makes you nervous.

Learns every one of your triggers so he can prevent them, whether that’s stopping himself from doing it or someone else

Holds you and cries about what you’ve been through, promises to never let it happen again

Portia;

Post-traumatic- down-syndrome? (Tiktok reference)

Nah but she isn’t certain what that is or what it means, but she DOES read about it and teaches herself what it all entails

Asks julien for further knowledge and how to help

Asks if you need space, to talk, advice, or just her company

In the middle of your attacks, she rubs you. Whether it’s your hand, your back, carding her fingers through your hair, she’s anchoring you back to the ground again

Asks what you need from her when you’re anxious

“Reassurance? Quality time? A listening ear—a shoulder? I have two of those!”

Muriel;

He understands you more then anyone. And funny enough, your anxiety seems to go hand in hand with his own

You’re damn right people are scary!! And loud noises are overwhelming!! And you’re angry and scared and just want to feel safe!! Him too!!

He isn’t the best at staying grounded, honestly he’s still learning healthy coping mechanisms

But when he sees you struggling, he finds himself in the clearest state of mind. He listens, he’s nurturing, and very intuitive.

Smiles so soft and so warm when you calm down from an episode, never pushes you to talk

Sometimes, you panic together about the same thing. Something about seeing someone you love feel the same way as you do….feels like home. You’re not dramatic, you’re more in control then you originally thought, and you’re cared for. Just as you care for him, he cares for you

Nadia;

She’s very good at rationalizing your racing thoughts, using logic to soothe your panic when it seems to be becoming too much

Uses her hands to massage the tension out of your muscles and help you process and work through the feelings you’re having

Aromatherapy, 100%

Reserved a spa day for you, just you and her, no one else. She knows the company of the servants would make you mask

Probably offers to buy you an exotic animal just so you have someone at your side if she’s away when you spiral

Lucio;

This man probably tells you to calm down, not realizing that’s making it worse.

Blubbers an apology immediately after, stuttering wildly as he waves his arms frantically

“No! Don’t cry—-! Hey, darling, it’s alright! What’s happened? My love, can you look at me? Show me those gorgeous eyes, there you go, wonderful. Now, what’s gotten you so upset?”

Thinks someone’s responsible, fully plans on lynching them as soon as he’s figured out the culprit

If your trigger is an inanimate object, he WILL destroy it. And yell at the servants not to trigger you

Drapes his cape over you so you feel sheltered and calm, so you can hide if you don’t want to be seen but don’t want to be alone

Definitely glares at anyone who attempts to call you emotional or puts you down for a natural reaction to trauma

Showers you in compliments, covers the mirrors in little affirmations with lipstick

Asra;

He knew. He’s always known. Even before you did.

He’s very patient, extremely passive and cautious

He educates others on your behalf so you’re never in an unwanted situation or triggered on accident

Reminds you to take medicine, eat, drink water, etc

Asks the arcana to guide you and offer you wisdom and clarity

Constantly ensures you’re never in a night terror/flashback

Can immediately tell when your anxiety spikes, doesn’t even ask before he brings you into the shop in a controlled and familiar environment and asks to talk

Admires you and your courage, he tells you everyday how strong you are and how proud of you he is

[hyacintheros]

Brand New City

4. Art Is Dead

|| (Marauders Era Characters x Fem!Reader)

Series Masterlist Previous Chapter

Pairing: Marauders Era Characters x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Mean James

Word Count: 2.1k

P.S: I'm sorry it’s been awhile, going through writer's block :c Anywho, let me know what yall think!

“Y/N, darling? You look flush..” Cissa asks her, as the girl is falling into her breakfast. Cissa quickly props her up, feeling her head. “Oh you're going to need some Pepperup Potion, what happened?” The older girl pulls her up and supports her on the way to Madam Pomfrey. She thinks back to last night. 

—♡—

Running into James, her parchments and books fly everywhere. “Sorry, let me help you with tha-”, James’ eyes scans over who he bumped into, retracting his helping hand with a disgusted look.

“You look stupid down there, just where you belong.” He says with a sneer, glaring while she picks her books up.

Standing back up with her things in order, she asks, “What is your issue? No matter how nice I am to you, it's like I've cursed your bloodline with the way you're acting!”

“You're my problem! A Slytherin! How could you call yourself a good person being in that godforsaken house? Don't you know what your house is known for? What they did to my family?” He pours out to her, anger glistening on his face.

“I have don't nothing wrong! My family has done you no wrong. You hang out with my cousin for Merlin's sake! Why does my house make me different? Why do the colours I wear change your perspective?” She yells out, pent up anger spilling with every word.

He steps forward, getting in her face. “Your house, your people, hurt my family, my parents! You and your cult of Death Eaters! Have you no shame?” He huffs in her face, pushing her back.

“Well if you haven't noticed, I'm a muggle! Why would I tangle myself in those ideals? You're literally best friends with my cousin, who is also a muggle, if you haven't noticed!” She pushes back, trying to move away from the wall.

In a burst of impulse, James pulls his wand out, “Aguamenti”. A jet of water douses the girl, soaking her to the bone.

Before she can retaliate, the boy runs away, likely back to his common room. The water-drenched girl heads to the Dungeons, her own common room awaiting her after curfew.

Padding her wet feet into the dorm, she keeps quiet, in hopes of keeping her roommates asleep. 

She's too tired to run a bath, instead opting to change into her pyjamas and sleep with a tower on her pillow to dry her hair.

—♡—

“Oh look at you dear! Come sit on the bed, I'll fetch something to make you feel better.” Madam Pomfrey instructs, running off to her medicine cabinet.

Narcissa helps sit Y/N down, her shaking and shivering preventing her from denying help. “I'll tell your friend Remus so he can tell your professors that you can't come.” The sickly girl nods haphazardly.

The black haired girl leaves back to the Great Hall, making sure to tell Remus at the Gryffindor table before heading back to her own table.

Madam Pomfrey sends her off with a Pepperup Potion to her dorm, telling her to sleep away the cold. 

She wobbles and trips, using the wall as assistance back to the dungeons. Upon entering the common room, it's empty with the fireplace lit. The girl heads up to her dorm, drinking half of the vial.

—♡—

“Well what do you mean she's sick, Remus?” The redhead persists, not noticing any signs of the cold or flu yesterday.

“I'm not sure exactly, one of her friends told me so I could tell the professors, but that's it.” Remus picks up his bag from under the table, waiting for Lily to follow along to class.

“I guess it makes sense why she told you first, you share most classes with her… should we visit her after classes are over?” Lily asks, her eyes glossy, never having seen her cousin sick before.

Remus ponders, wondering if they should give her privacy today. “We'll see after class? Let her rest a bit.” The two part ways to their respective classes, Remus let's Professor Sprout know that Y/N can't attend.

—♡—

Madam Pomfrey had given the girl some Pepperup Potion, sending her down to the Slytherin dorms to get some rest, sending her Professors a notice for her absence. Pomfrey assumed the girl she came with, Narcissa, has already told some friends.

In bed, she feels worse than before, telling herself that you have to feel worse before you feel better,  which in hindsight, probably isn't the right mindset. She pulls the jumper tighter, puffing up her blanket more to get some warmth.

She shakes and shivers, restless and hungry, having not eaten as Cissa caught her right before she could grab breakfast when she sat down. That being said, she's too jello-like to fetch any food. Instead, praying that she'll be able to fall asleep soon.

Turning over to the nightstand, the girl rummages through the drawers, hoping to find any muggle pain killers she'd brought with her. Grabbing the case of painkillers and a small vial of night-time cough syrup, she takes it in hopes of feeling a little better, risking the unknown side effects of it being paired with a magical Potion.

Finally, thirty minutes later, the shivering stops and her mind at ease, falling asleep with a jumper on and two blankets resting on her. A dreamless nap overtakes her, soothing the girl mentally and physically.

—♡—

Severus had heard the news from Narcissa, gathered notes for her in the classes they shared, telling himself to visit her after classes are over. 

By lunchtime, Remus had told Lily, Sirius, and a boy named Peter who had recently joined their little group of friends. James had heard through Lily, a twinge of guilt was felt in his stomach, seeing Lily worried for her cousin. He stuck to his act as a comforting friend for Lily, not wanting to see her too worked up over it, knowing he caused the girl to feel sick.

Sirius and Lily had shoved small snacks into their pockets, waiting to visit Y/N after class, while Remus took notes for her in class, grabbing a book he thinks she'll like from his collection. The three Gryffindors meet up in front of the Slytherin common room, now a little stumped as they don't know the password.

“What are you lot doing standing like duc- Ow!” Lucius gets a good smack on the arms from Narcissa. “Here to see Y/N? I'll let you in.” Cissa says with a charming smile. She looks to the portrait, “Anguis”, the portrait opens up, revealing the common room.

Cissa drops Lucius at the couch, then looking towards the red-robed kids. “Come on then. I'll take you to our room.” She grabs Lily's hand and walks to the girls dorms, the two boys following suite.

Pushing the door open, the sound of gentle, yet disturbed snoring filled the room, like something was blocking her nose. They pile into the room, approaching her sleeping form. Cissa opens the door, hearing a knock.

Severus walks in, parchments in hand, scanning the room of its guests, eyes landing on Lily. “Oh Severus! It's so good to see you.” The red-head says, not having seen him in a while. The Raven haired boy smiles, then greets her. 

“Have you taken notes then? I think you're in some classes that I don't have with her, do you think we could combine notes then?” Remus says to him, seeing the stack of parchments the Slytherin boy carries. 

“Some notes are overlapping, but I think we've got everything.” Severus tells Lupin, knowing they have one or two classes together. They sort through both piles, placing them carefully on her desk.

“Do you think we should let her sleep? Don't want to wake her up..” Lily says to Narcissa, wanting her opinion. “Honestly, I think she's slept about three or four hours now.. We should let her sleep more, heard her rustling in bed all night.”

The older girl let's them stay a little bit to leave some snacks for her, Sirius had munched a little through his during class, so it was mainly Lily who put some food on the bed-side table. They leave her dorm, thanking Narcissa for letting them in.

Cissa toddles back to Lucius, “They're not that bad, you know?” The blonde headed boy scoffs, rolling his eyes at her statement, going back to reading his book. 

—♡—

Feeling terribly warm, being covered and layers of heat, she wakes up sweating, pulling off blankets and jumpers in the hopes of feeling coolness on her skin. Panning around the room, she spots a bun with some spreads. a teeny jar of strawberry marmalade and butter.

It's just past the evening, still an hour or two before dinner. She gladly takes the bun, not having eaten since dinner last night. As she munches, she looks at the desk, seeing a stack of parchments. 

Getting up, the girl surveys the parchments flipping through, obviously being done by two different people. Skimming through the notes and titles, she realises it's class notes. Recognising Severus’ cursive, yet not being able to pinpoint the other person's handwriting, yet still feeling a sense of familiarity.

She goes back to the bed-side table, finishing up the rest of the Pepperup Potion- oddly tasting like strawberry cough syrup.

Bella enters quietly, unsure if the ill girl was still asleep. Gazing at the bed, the curly-haired girl perks up, “Darling, how do you feel? Cissy told me you weren't doing too well..” Y/N smiles, grateful she has people who care, like Cissa and Bella.

“I think it was just a small fever, feel almost better now.. D'you know who left these?” She says, referring to the snacks and parchments. “Cissy said she let your Gryffindor friends visit, plus Severus!” Bella responds, not being in the room when they visited.

The girl hums in acknowledgement, a sort of warmth spreading through her chest at the thought of her friends. Although, the reminder of the red house gives her a bad taste, thinking of how she got sick in the first place.

“What time is it? S'it time for dinner yet?” She pouts, still terribly hungry after munching the small bun. Bella nods and grabs her hand, pulling her to the Great Hall.

—♡—

“Now, you look much better than this morning! Keep this extra potion just in case you feel a little tingle of the cold left, right dear?” Madame Pomfrey hands her a small vial for safe keeping. She thanks the nurse, heading back to her dorm.

Travelling through the halls, a few students still linger before curfew, chit chatting with their friends. Behind her, someone calls out for the girl, “Hey! Did you get the parchments?” Remus, looking oddly dishevelled, says.

“It was you! I did, thank you so much by the way, don't know how I would've know about Uric the Oddball… Are you alright?” She points out how in a hurry he looks.

He shrugs it off, attributing it to a late night jog. “You look much better, glad you're doing well.” Y/N chuckles, thanking him once again for the notes. They quickly catch up about the day, Remus telling her about Sirius’ newest adventures.

Remus looks at his watch, his eyebrows pinching a little, “You better head to the dungeons, curfew is about to hit. Have a goodnight Y/N” Remus quickly says, rushing off.

Confused by his behaviour, the Slytherin instead chooses to think about how he wrote the notes for her.. her cheeks flush pink at the thought! Would he think she's slacking off just because she's sick? How troublesome. She goes back to the dorms, promising herself to study the topics before tomorrow's classes.

Briskly walking back to her dorm, she doesn't want to have another encounter with Potter, fearing he'll make her more than just sick. She ponders on what he said last night. ‘Death Eaters?’ What would make him think that she, a muggle born, would be a Death Eater?

Reaching the common room, she sees Lucius and Narcissa first. Plopping down, Lucius tells her the newest drama of the Slug Club, how terribly artificial the cherry pudding tasted. She laughs, finding his choice of topic amusing. 

Spotting a long, raven-haired boy, she greets Severus, thanking him greatly for the potions notes. “S’not like you needed them.” The boy snaps back. In turn, she pats his shoulder, returning to her dorm to get some studying done. He waves her off, going back to his book. But deep down, he feels his head go lighter at her recognition…

[magics-neptunes-things]

Recovery

Hi everyone :)

This was asking by someone like probably a year ago, sorry for the wait!

Prompt : have you had a good day? I hope so.someday we can get something from one batlle x reader.where their teammates think they are doing something out of character. But are they really just struggling not to take their medicine?

Maybe it's a little deeper than I thought at first, sorry? But it is a subject that I master rather well so I may have been a little carried away.

I'm still open for any of your ideas or want :)

TW : Oral fight, angst, depression, treatments, swearing.

______________________________________________________________

You’ve never been good at dealing with your emotions since you were a kid. Even if you never lacked anything and your parents always wanted the best for you, you always had a part in you that made you feel that everything you did was not enough. Having a little sister who was successful everywhere you had failed a few years ago probably didn’t help much, especially when you saw how proud your parents were of her. You have always been in the norm, in the average. You always did everything so that no one would notice you, your fear of being a disappointment taking over from the rest.

It worked for many years, until you changed class at school for random reason and ended up with Alessia Russo sitting next to you. For a reason that you never really understood, she got soft spot for you and wanted to become your friend. From the height of your eight years you were delighted and you gladly let yourself be dragged with her on the football fields. That’s when it really started. You found a sport that you liked and something that you really felt good about. Initially skeptical, your parents finally let you play and you climbed the ladder hand in hand with Alessia. The only difference was that you were in front of the goals trying to stop the balls rather than trying to put them in the net.

You and Alessia end up splitting up when she flies to the United States and you stay to play at Chelsea. You were selected to join the national team of England as soon as you were old enough and there too you made your place. At the end of your contract with Chelsea, you signed at Lyon, where you stayed until the summer of 2022. Year of England’s victory at the Euro, in which you participated by playing all the matches until the final. These memories will remain engraved in you forever, but it is also from there that your anxiety began to overtake you.

You didn’t say anything first of all, claiming that it came from your arrival in Barcelona, along with your colleague and friend Lucy Bronze. The latter had taken you under her wing for a long time, having perhaps realized that there was more to scratch under the surface of your smooth and angelic smile. Or maybe Alessia asked her to watch over you, because despite the physical distance between you two, she’s still your best friend.

Alessia introduced you to Ona, playing alongside her at Manchester United for a while. You quickly fell under the spell of the Spanish girl, her good humor, her charming smile and the way she had to sincerely care about others were something we are not used to. She quickly admitted that the feelings were reciprocal, but the geographical distance prevented you from fully living your relationship. When you learned that Ona’s transfer to Barcelona was finally accepted, you finally decided to try everything for everything. Instead of taking an apartment for her, you and Ona looked for an apartment together in which you settled when she arrived in Barcelona.

A few weeks later you were both called into your respective national selections. You knew what was happening in the Spanish squad, Ona having already refused to go there by signing a first petition against its leaders. Her change of heart was very badly perceived by the fans and the criticism she received affected you as much as it did to her. But you have always done your utmost to support her.

Being separated from Ona was not easy during those weeks. You managed to escape from time to time to find each other again, but having not mentioned your relationship outside your circles of friends, you didn't want to be caught by someone. Not to mention you were worried about the possible repercussions for Ona if her federation ever discovered the nature of your relationship.

The first panic attack you had was at the quarter-final against China. The goal you conceded that day was the first of the competition and the failure sensation that gave you was such that you had to lock yourself in the toilet at the end of the game. This is where Alessia found you and you don’t remember exactly how she brought you back to your hotel room, nor how she managed to make sure that Ona could join you there.

The following crises you managed to feel them happen, it was usually the night before the matches, but you also had some after the matches. Lauren, your regular tournament roommate, never realized every night you got up to go breathe fresh air on the balcony, sleeping too deep for that. And it was a relief to you, honestly. You didn’t want to worry anyone, let alone be pitied. Not being able to manage your nerves was a new shame in your eyes.

Except that you didn't win the tournament, losing the final because of a goal conceded. Your fault, finally. None of your teammates told you but you didn’t need to. You knew it. After your last game, you quickly jumped on the first plane back to Barcelona and away from Australia. You rejected your girlfriend’s offer not to go to the celebrations in Spain to stay with you, swearing that you were okay and that she deserved to enjoy what happened to her. If you sincerely thought the second part of the sentence, the first was probably the biggest lie of your life.

When you got to your apartment, you turned off your phone and lived in the dark for two days. Until Lucy shows up in your apartment and fails to break down the door, sent by a panicked Ona not to hear from you. After looking at the mace informs that you were under the sheets of your bed, Lucy pulled you out and took you to the emergency room. They found nothing physical, so you ended up in the psychiatric ward, despite your protests. They diagnosed you with depression and anxiety attacks but allowed you to go out only on the condition that you take your treatment daily.

You did for many weeks, before you realized that it was tiring you and making your abilities on the field less efficient than usual. Spoiler : It wasn’t, but your tortured mind didn’t seem to want to leave you alone.

So, you stopped taking them. To avoid Ona’s attention, you were throwing your daily dose of medication down the toilet. At first, it didn’t change your mood but you felt like you had regained the energy you had before. Except things started to turn the wrong way little by little. The slightest annoyance affected you a little too long and you started to have insomnia again. You briefly tried to take your treatment every two days, but it was worse than anything. So you simply stopped and you tried to silence the aggressive comments of your brain towards yourself. You had worried your girlfriend and friends enough about you.

****************

"Oh god Y/N how are you so clingy all the time?"

The phrase of one of the staff members, thrown in the tone of laughter, makes you raise your look from the screen of the computer on which Ona and you were watching a film. Train trips to another city were always a time when you chose to do something together. No team member seemed disturbed by this, you and Ona were almost tied by the hip at this point. The other couple, aka Ingrid and Mapi are doing the same anyway.

"I- I just…"

Surprised by the remark, you get up without thinking from Ona on which you had leaned your head. But your girl struck down the other woman with her eyes and took you back with authority against her.

"No need to be jealous like that" Lucy jokes from the seat in front of you, where she settled with Alexia.

"I love my clingy girlfriend just like that" Ona points and then put her attention back on the movie, making you to do the same.

You do it without adding anything, looking at the screen, the staff member leaving you to go back to her place. Or at least that’s what you want to make the other believe, your mind starting running. What if she was right and it was too much for Ona? You couldn’t stand a break up with her, she’s your pillar, your beacon in the dark. You try not to let anything appear, from your hands that become sweaty to your heart rate that has increased terribly.

Lost in your thoughts, you don't notice the worried look that Lucy exchanges with Ona between the two seats. Normally, you would have started Lucy’s joke.

Your mind slows down when you feel your girlfriend’s nose briefly caress your temple and then leave room for her lips. She kisses you delicately, making you raise your look on her. Her eyes are sweet, her smile is tender and you can’t help but give it back to her.

"Mi corazoncita"

She whispers and this time you feel your heart racing with love. You are wrong to doubt the sincerity or strength of Ona’s feelings. She has always been there for you, for the best certainly but also for the worst. Especially for the worst.

****************

Unfortunately, these kinds of moments have become more frequent as the days go by. You have started to doubt each of the jokes that are made to you, you get lost in your thoughts and you regularly wake up in the middle of the night, the heart beating way too hard. It sometimes wakes Ona up and you pretend a nightmare, making her cuddle you and help you fall asleep again. When it doesn’t wake her up, you don’t have the heart to do it. So you sneak out from under the sheets to go to your living room and turn on the television, anything that would keep you from thinking again.

All of this added to lack of sleep makes you feel increasingly irritable. You lack patience during training and you even disrespected one of your teammates. You quickly apologized and were forgiven, but it was spotted by others. With the passage of time you started to feel like you were being put in the spotlight, just waiting for the other to make mistakes and point the finger at you.

This was not lacking in the next game, during which you conceded a new goal. Again, you’ve been in a terrible mood all weekend, just refusing to talk to anyone. The worst was probably the guilt that was eating away at you from your behavior. But it quickly became an infernal circle from which you couldn't get out, despite all the goodwill and hands extended by your girlfriend or friends. The worst was yet to come.

****************

You are in Barcelona, receiving the team of Atletico de Madrid. You didn't concede a goal that day and it was with great relief when you heard the whistle of the referee. Alexia scored a goal in the second half, which was enough for the team to win the famous three points. After greeting a few opposing players and congratulating your teammates (giving you a longer time when you found yourself against Ona), you and Lucy went to see Ana Crnogorčević with whom you played last year and whom you always liked.

The discussion was pleasant and you felt relieved and relaxed, like every time you won without conceding goals. While you were talking about Ana’s arrival in Madrid, the image you saw over the shoulder of your interlocutor was like a punch in the stomach.

Ona in full discussion with one of her acquaintances, Carmen Menayo. Really, you could have endured it since your girlfriend is perfectly entitled to have friends outside of you. But seeing that the other player had her hands almost everywhere at once on the body of your girlfriend made you see red. If you had been focused on Ona’s face you would have seen how uncomfortable this behavior made her, but that was the cork of your insecurity bottle.

Unable to see anything else, you only come back to yourself when you realize that Lucy is dragging you somewhere else.

"Come on Kiddo"

Once again your mind is blurred until you find yourself at home, in your apartment, without Ona. Where is she? Certainly enjoying her friend, having a good time with someone in a good mood. Someone who would make her happy. Someone who wouldn’t be you.

The mixture of anxiety, anger and all that has accumulated in recent weeks is about to make you lose your footing and, in a desperate attempt, you begin to walk. You promised Lucy it was okay and you sent her home, even if you don’t remember it right now. You must have been convincing, because she knows full well what happened at the Euro and what you are suffering from.

A few minutes later, the front door finally opens to a hesitant Ona. Needless to say, those minutes seemed like hours.

"Where have you been?" you ask a little too aggressively when you turn to her.

"The girls told me you went home with Lucy, so I showered and come home."

Ona's voice was soft as she drops her bag next to the door. You answer nothing, content yourself with a sarcastic snort. Of course, they were on her side. Could you blame them? No, obviously not. They knew Ona and also knew she deserved better than you.

"Maybe if you had been less busy with your friend, you would have seen me leave."

The sentence was scathing, filled with bitter sarcasm. The quotation marks you used with your fingers when you said the word "friend" might have been funny if it wasn’t so dramatic.

"What are you talking about, Bebita?"

Ona approaches you and tries to place a hand on your arm, but you quickly release her contact.

"Don’t fucking touch me."

An alarm siren has been on for a few minutes in your head, but you ignore it prodigiously. The sensations you feel in your belly are such that you wonder by what miracle you haven't vomited yet.

"By the way, what are you doing here? You should have gone to your bitch’s house, probably had a better night than here with me. Isn’t it what she told you?"

Despite your accusatory tone, Ona has the merit of not getting upset. But you’d rather see her yell at you than see her eyes filled with tears.

"You talk nonsense. Listen, everybody’s worried about you, you haven’t been yourself for a while. Maybe... Maybe you should ask someone for help?"

Tears roll down her cheeks and it’s too much for you. Ona should not have to cry because of you, she is the sweetest, kindest and simply the most perfect girl on earth. The reaction you have, by contrast, is probably the stupidest possible. Trying to push her away from you is probably not the best thing. And yet.

"Not yours anyway. I don’t need you."

"Y/N..."

"No, Ona. The truth is, it’s not that I don’t need you, it’s that I don’t want you here."

You found yourself screaming without even realizing it and the silence that ensued was like death. You may never be able to erase Ona’s expression from your mind. After these few seconds suspended, Ona turns the heels and disappears through the front door of your apartment.

*************

You didn’t hear from Ona in the next days, but it would have been complicated anyway since you threw your phone against a wall shortly after she left, with some other things. Then, you spent your nerves on the cushions of the sofa in your living room before falling into tears when you saw the photos that Ona had taken the habit of hanging on a wire held with tweezers above your television.

Ona didn’t come back either, but that didn’t surprise you. You ruined everything, like every time. Someone knocked on your door several times but you didn't answer, staying motionless, lying on the floor of your kitchen or prostrated in your bathroom. You knew perfectly well that it wasn’t Ona, if it had been her she would have opened the door.

After the game against Atletico, you had two days off and you imagine that your lack of response didn't intrigue many people. Given the fight you had with your girlfriend, they must think you don’t want to see anyone. Girlfriend? Ex, maybe. You don’t know anymore.

On the day you resume training, you completely lost track of time. Daylight then street lights illuminate your ceiling and change the vision of things, but that’s about all you see. You didn’t eat, you didn’t drink, and you couldn’t tell how long you slept. The pain, the emotions have gradually given way to a general anesthesia thanks to which you no longer feel anything. Physically as well as emotionally.

The evening of the day of the resumption of training, you are awakened by the door of your apartment that opens while you were lying in the floor of your kitchen. The footsteps are too heavy for it to be Ona. You don’t even turn your head, too absorbed by the images projected on the ceiling.

"Bloody hell Y/N, what the fuck?!"

Alessia.

Your best friend appears in your field of vision and watches you with a mixture of fair and relief. What is she doing here?

"I came to see if you were still alive, you idiot. Everyone is freaking out and thinks you’re drowning in your bathtub."

You hadn't realized that your thoughts had been spoken aloud.

"It might be better."

Your voice is a whispers. Alessia looks at you from her height and ends up lying next to you, on the cold tiled floor of the apartment you shared with Ona. A few minutes passed and Alessia ended up speaking again.

"You’re in a terrible state. And I’m not talking about your physique."

You don’t answer. You know that.

"You need help, Y/N"

She takes your hand in her and you take a deep breath and close your eyes. You know that, too. But just because you need it doesn’t mean you want it.

"Where is Ona?"

"At Alexia’s."

You imagined that the Latin girl had gone to live with someone else, but during these three days you had imagined her at Menayo's. Knowing that she wasn’t relieves you, even if talking about her lights a flame in your throat that you can’t swallow.

"I've lost her"

It’s not a question you ask Alessia, it’s a statement you make out loud. The blonde sighs and turns her head in your direction. You imagine her thoughts very well, she deserves better than what you are. (Spoiler bis : This isn't what Alessia thinks for a second)

"I’m going to get you out of this apartment and you’re going to go into a place to really heal yourself. Then we’ll see what we can fix."

Except, you don’t want to. Regaining some energy, you shake your head and sit down abruptly and grab her arm.

"No. Don’t make me go to one of these centers, I beg you, Less, please. I’ll do whatever you want."

Your despair seems to touch your best friend, who hesitates, looking at you. She also sat down and bite her lips. You whisper one last plea and she sighs as she passes a hand through her hair.

"At least I’ll take you to the hospital. Maybe they’ll keep you for a few days, but as soon as you get out, I need you to swear to me that you’ll follow your treatment and go to a psychiatrist. It’s not a shame, if you knew how many players should do it too. No one will love you less because you get treatment."

*********

You stay four days in the hospital and Alessia stayed with you until the third day. From there she had to go back to London and you almost threw her out. You refuse that she has any professional difficulties because of you. Your visits are regulated and you had to choose four unique names. Alessia, Lucy, Alexia and Ona. The latter has still not come to see you and you hesitated for a long time before adding her to your list. In the meantime, Alessia had your phone repaired but you weren’t allowed to use it until the last day.

The club masked your absence at training by mentioning an ankle injury, thanks to Lucy’s responsiveness no one noticed your trouble in the last game. Plus, if you have to miss several weeks, it will not seem too surprising. It’s a relief for you, even if you agreed to get treatment, you don’t want the general public to know about it for the moment. Maybe later.

Since you can’t contact Ona by text or phone, you decided to write her a letter. Alexia promised to give it to her, but you are aware that this doesn't mean that she will read it. You often ask your captain about Ona. You know she sleeps at Alexia's sometimes, your's or her parent's. On the third day, you asked Alexia if she thought Ona would come to see you here. Hoping to see her figure walk through the door to find you with one of your three friends was sometimes difficult.

"She needs time" Alexia replied.

You noded, knowing it was perfectly selfish of you to want her here. In your letter, you apologized at length for your behavior and explained everything that happened to you in the last few days. And you told her how much you miss her, too. The discussions you had with the hospital psychiatrist also helped you a lot.

"Have you ever thought about quitting football?"

"What?! Of course not. Football was the reason I met the most important people in my life. It’s the only area where I’m not too bad."

She thought for a few seconds before continuing.

"Okay. But the way you throw yourself under the bus with every goal you take, it’s not healthy. We have to find a solution so that you stop living every goal as a failure."

That was the crux of the problem, unfortunately. But with your new treatment, which you were taking with attention this time, it seemed that you could be a little more optimistic.

***********

On day four, you were allowed out in the late afternoon. In the morning, you were able to get your phone back and with Lucy by your side you turned it on. The number of notifications was such that it crashed and you had to turn it back on. You received countless messages before and after your hospitalization. Ona’s were the hardest to read, of course. After you were hospitalized, she stopped writing to you and the first thing you did was look for her social media accounts. Since the game, she hasn’t posted anything.

You then replied to some of the messages you received, to Alessia or some of your teammates for example. Family and friends, too. With your psychiatrist, you decided to limit social media. So you have removed Twitter from your phone, limited comments on your Instagram posts and your TikTok account is only used to watch videos anyway. You never posted anything with it.

It was Alexia who came to pick you up at your exit and it was good to breathe a little fresh air. You climbed into her car, realizing soon after that she was not going to your apartment or hers.

"Where are we going?"

Curiosity outweighed anxiety, but you didn’t ask yourself where you were going. A look in her direction is enough to remove you from the head she was taking you straight to a rehabilitation center. This treatment was truly miraculous.

"You will see"

The answer was simple, but addressed with a smile that relaxed you quickly. It didn't stop your curiosity but when you left the city, you understood before even arriving at the destination. Alexia was taking you to Villassar de Mar, Ona’s hometown.

"Will I see her?" you asked after a few minutes

Alexia replied with a simple nod, startling when she saw you suddenly stand up on your seat.

"I can’t see her like that, look how dressed I am"

Alexia’s gaze slipped on your clothes, jeans and a sweatshirt that you just stole from Ona. You obviously took a shower before going out, but still. You are far from perfect.

"We don’t care Y/N, really"

"At least let me buy her flowers"

Alexia roll her eyes, but she smiled and stopped at the shop you mentioned to her. This is Ona’s favorite, in one of the villages close to her parent's. On your first date she stopped by and gave you a bouquet of mixed flowers. She told you that she didn’t know which flowers you preferred but that she found those very beautiful.

Needless to say, you opted for the same bouquet.

Arriving in Villassar de Mar, Alexia doesn't take you to your in-laws as you had imagined. She drops you off near one of the beaches full of memories for Ona and you. The windy weather took everyone away from the beach, except for a silhouette that you would recognize between a thousand. Sitting against one of the rocks that delimits the small cove, Ona looks towards the horizon.

When you see her, you feel a form of stress taking hold of you, but different from the anxiety that persisted in recent weeks. You bite your lips before feeling Alexia's arm around your shoulder, taking you for an hug.

"You’ve come a long way Y/N. We’re all very proud of you."

You don’t need to look her in the eye to check the sincerity of her words and you offer her a shy smile. With that, she gently pushes you towards the beach and you slowly break the distance between Ona and you, playing nervously with the stems of the flowers that you hold in your hands.

The wind blows a little, blowing Ona’s hair. Arriving at one meter behind her, you are not sure that she heard you. You let a few moments pass during which you take the opportunity to look at her. She looks tired, not to say exhausted. A new wave of guilt takes hold of you and you take one last step before reporting your presence.

"Hi"

She gently turns her gaze towards you and the strength of your feelings for her hits you hard.

"Hi"

She answers you gently and after a few seconds a slight smile appears on her lips. His eyes run through your face and you clear your throat before raising the flowers in her direction, a little embarrassed.

"It’s for you. They’re beautiful, but not as beautiful as you?"

Ona laughs softly, but you see her hands shake when she grabs the bouquet to carry it to her nose and breathe the smell.

"Is that a question?" she asks over the flowers.

"No but pickup lines were never my thing. You do look beautiful though" you just answer without taking your eyes off her. "I missed you."

"I miss you too, but…"

You step forward to interrupt her, not wanting to hear what she is hiding behind this "but".

"No, Ona, please listen to me." You wait until she nods before continuing. "I’m really, really sorry. I never wanted to hurt you, scream at you, or make you cry. I will do anything if you give me another chance. I know it sounds like a creepy guy with dozens of red flags, but I swear I’ll do better than I’ve done so far."

The Latin looks at you while you speak before sighing gently and letting her gaze float in the wave. She seems to look for her words and you let her do it, looking at her face with intensity. You realize that this may be the last time you see her, you want to immerse yourself in her as much as possible.

"If continue together Y/N, I want you to promise to really heal yourself. I couldn’t stand a second time watching you self-destruct like you did."

"I swear. I’ll do it for you. For us."

You mean it sincerely and the strength of your answer seems to surprise Ona. It must be said that you have seemed unsure of anything lately. She looks at you for a long time and you let her do it, a little embarrassed. Your eyes find their path to your shoes.

"Why are you always so shy?"

Ona’s amused tone surprises you and in a second your gaze is back on her.

"What do you mean?"

"You never knew how to handle compliments, you always blush when I look at you, you roll your eyes at me when I tell you that I find you beautiful…"

You retain a grimace of extreme accuracy, but you are convinced that Ona has realized it. You answer her however, shrugging you shoulders. If there is a time when you have to be honest with each other, it's now.

"I never understood what you found in me from the beginning. I thought you weren’t as interested in me as I was in you and that the long-distance relationship suited you. To be honest with you, I was looking to have the most of you until you realized there are other girls that are much more interesting than me."

Ona frowns and gets ready to speak, but you raise your hand to ask her to let you continue. Now that you’ve started, you need to clear your head.

"I was always convinced that you would find someone better than me at some point, someone joyful who would make you happier. Last week when you started crying because me, I just wanted you to leave so you wouldn’t be sad. Nothing else in the world matters more than you and your happiness to me. I’m sorry I showed you so badly, I’m sorry I wasn’t up to it, for making you cry and for making you go through hell. I’ve only been sure of one thing in all this fog since this summer, it’s the strength of my feelings for you. I really want to build something serious together. You’re the love of my life, Ona."

It was random, probably said in a completely disorderly way, but it was totally sincere. You find yourself a little breathless after your tirade and you look carefully at Ona. She also seems to be breathless and a few seconds pass, only disturbed by the sound of the waves behind you. You realize that when she speaks again, she has tears in her eyes.

"You're enough Y/N. I promise you're enough"

She whispers but approaches you to take your face in her two hands. It is a tender gesture and you feel a pleasant warmth at the precise place where her skin is in contact with yours.

"And I love you too. We’ll get through this together. I promise."

You smile softly and nod at her answer. After these long monologues, you find yourself a little short of words.

"No more lies or secrets?" said Ona.

"No more lies or secrets."

A new smile exchanged before your lips finally meet, sealing your promises of eternity. Because she loves you as much as you do. And it will be forever you and her.

[kyra45]

Scam posts and how to spot them

(Scam posts and how to spot them)

Hi! My names Key (or Jess depending on where you know me from) and I’m here again on your dashboard to tell you about scams and the general things to look out for when you get asks for mutual aid.

Disclaimer: Not every blog asking for mutual aid is a scammer and therefore you shouldn’t assume everyone is a scammer on sight. It’s necessary to do some research into the accounts who appear in your askbox or DMs.

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Anyway, what is a scam post?

A scam post is a post that’s usually asking for monetary support but isn’t being entirely honest about the reason and also may be misleading or stolen from someone else. These posts range from a variety of topics but generally are based on trending events or medical attention such as needing insulin or medicine to prevent lungs from collapsing. The scam post means that the post is false and no money sent is going to someone who needs it because the poster is lying and isn’t telling the truth about who they are or what their fundraising for and may be stealing their post off someone else to make bank. Sometimes a scam post is about needing to pay a bill for pet care and the images are stolen off another fundraiser offsite much like the usual scam.

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How do you find out if something is a scam?

One of the best ways to find out if a post is a scam is to search the username of the blog and see if anyone’s made any posts about the account who sent you an ask. It’s also suggested to search the ask as well to see if it may have came from another blog who was already called out for the same scam at some point in time. You may also find the account disappears before you can answer the ask if you was waiting some time before answering it.

It’s also likely the account may reuse the same pfp/story across multiple accounts with very little change in their posting content. This means the blog sending the ask has only a few random reblogs and then one original post. What the blog hopes for is that you don’t bother scrolling down a lot to see how very few posts they may have. If you use timestamps, you’ll see that often the pinned post is a few days old or even hours old. The tags also are usually completely unrelated to the content itself. (If you’re legit and do this for visibility, don’t. It’s spam if not in reblogs. Please use only related tags as per the rules.) Sometimes the link is several colors of text. (If you do this for some reason, please consider accessibility for those who can’t see some color and may miss the link entirely.) And other times there’s a linktree link posing as something else.

Also the blog may say they’re vetted/verified but keep in mind this doesn’t matter if they don’t tell you or say anywhere on their blog who vetted them or what organization confirmed their legitimacy. They won’t say who because asking whoever it is would instantly call out the scammer themselves. It has happened already and that’s why you shouldn’t trust a ‘vetted’ blog if they don’t list anyone anywhere on their page. Some accounts will just say that and expect you to not ask anything because they can’t pass whatever means of verification is asked for.

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What do you do if you know for certain a post is a scam?

Please alert anyone sharing the post and also make a post yourself compiling the evidence you’ve gathered proving the scam so others searching will see it and be able to decide for themselves if the account is a scam or not. This makes it easier for a scam blog to be found out even if they try changing urls as they always do that for some reason.