#what fucking tags do people even use
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it's not even art block i'm like severely mentally ill i can't do shit so have these ed doodles
that on the right was an eli sketch but whatever
i hate his fucking glasses i hate drawing glasses goooooddamn his mother birthed a mole
#the batman 2022#the riddler#paul dano#paul dano riddler#self ship#yumeship#whatever that's me kissing another nerd#danonation#what fucking tags do people even use#sketch#fanart#edward nashton#oc x canon
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I NEEEEEEED Kurt shippers. or just Kurt insane people to know that the german word for tail is also german slang for penis
"You like my tail dont you" said in german ("Du magst meinen schwanz, oder?") will be read as "you like my dick dont you" by a german
this isnt to discourage people from using the word Schwanz, the oposite, i want people to write Kurt saying that because he WOULD
#and yes. 'schwanz' will be read as 'dick' by default#even if it is the only word for tail we have#we will still read that as dick even if it wasnt the intention#to the point of german warrior cats (the suffix 'tail' exists a lot) having to use the word for a horses tail (which is more implied to#be just A Tail Made Of Hair. or an alternative for pony tail) instad of actually 'tail' because . ya know#anyways. i want people to write him being a little flirt and shit but the people that understand Some german without knowing slang#just thinking hes actually referring to his tail instead of.............. not#kurt wagner#x-men#uh what the fuck do i tag this as#Logurt#?#im writing this BECAUSE of a logurt tiktok i saw so shrugs#nightcrawler
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How do you sleep at night? No one to hide behind Betrayed every alibi you had You had every chance to make amends instead you got drunk on bitterness And you still claim that you're innocent, it's sad
#daniel ricciardo#dr3#christian horner#for the blacklists#I recognize that christian horner in a gifset is NOT the kind of content people in ricnation are looking for rn#debated posting this but fuck it#me 🤝🏼 daniel: two bitches that love a depressing song lyric#it's about breaking free from a toxic relationship and the importance of prioritizing one's own needs#and that it can take a long time to recognize the dynamics at play in those relationships#and removing yourself from that situation can be just as hard and that just kind of epitomizes daniel with christian for me#in the return to rbr I think daniel trusted that CH would at the very least be straight forward and upfront with him#even if the end result wasn't what daniel wanted or hoped for#daniel could handle not getting the rbr seat#but something he couldn't handle was the truth that the one person he believed he could trust was gaslighting him and using him#and daniel had a light bulb moment - the point where you realize that sometimes the best thing you can do for yourself is to walk away#and so he got out#also this is obviously my interpretation of a relationship that I have zero insider info on and maybe they are chill now#as always…thinking too deeply about people I don’t know in the tags#also i recognize that this song is actually about a tiktok hype house but whatever rbr are that immature so it fits#this is my first go with this type of editing in PS so if you have any tips on style and execution i'm all ears#Apparently i also owe CH an apology bc i was so sure he didn't shake daniel's hand pre-race in singapore but he actually did and i missed i#during the breakdown i was having anyway fuck him still
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Some notes on some stuff
An update on creative pursuits:
I can now honestly admit that part of me never thought I'd be able to say this, BUT! Adore part 3 is now completely written. Let me be clear, at no point did I give up on hoping and wanting to finish it, but for a while in the past year it felt like an absolutely insurmountable task that I would never wrap my brain around. I want to give myself some time to sit with it, so it's not getting posted yet, but I will give a tentative, rough estimate of late March or early April for the first chapter. Surprise surprise, it's the longest instalment yet, at over 60k words.
Concerning binding and other transformative works:
I've had a few inquiries about binding Adore verse and I don't think I've answered most of them (sorry!), so I'll just say this:
I give blanket permission for anyone to create a binding, podfic, translation, or artwork of any of my stories. I don't even mind if you don't ask me first, as long as you tell me about it once you share it. In the case of bindings, I'd love to be sent a copy, if at all possible. In the case of any other works shared in online spaces, I'd just like for you to include a link back to the original work on AO3. And for translations, I'd prefer that it be kept on AO3 itself, because I really am not a fan of other fanfic hosting websites. If you have any other questions, feel free to shoot me a DM, and don't be shocked if it takes me several weeks to respond, because that's just how I roll.
#what criteria do people even use to decide whether to agree to a translation of their fic?#i only speak english so it's not like i can judge how good you are at some other language#anyway blanket permission for podfics used to be a thing back in the livejournal days so here it is#also binding fics was definitely NOT a thing in my circles back then#but it would be rad to see it#ALSO I WROTE A 62k WORD STORY WHAT THE FUCK#i realise this is insignificant in a fandom where most fics are like over 100k#but for me that is a fucking miracle#is this too many conversational tags?#is that a millennial thing?#i talk too much
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ill probably delete this in a minute but ive just been fuckin boggled by what ive seen across tumblr in the last few days in particular. its why i havent really been around. like holy fucking shit, its really like some of yall just dont want a chunk of the trans community to exist. like some of yall are thisclose to saying it verbatum. way too many already have. 'shut up sit down be quiet and smile for us' type shit, gee where have i heard that before. oh yeah my entire life cause i was forcefully gendered as someones daughter. shock horror i know. you might be surprised to remember and/or learn that very few trans folks know theyre trans before we're 5, or even 10, and that that gendered experience stays with all of us in both/either small or large ways. either bc we literally dont have a solid identity yet (bc we're very small children), dont have the words, we're repressing it out of fear from how others will treat us, we're actually enjoying or enjoyed being another gender in our childhood, or we just genuinely didnt fuckin know until shit lined up later in life. weird isnt it that transmascs dont pop out as 6'1 brick shithouse cis men when we're born so yall know for certain that we're confused lost girls/women oops i mean big dangerous scary men. its almost like we're transgender too. none of yall actually know what intersectionality is or means
#my t#transandrophobia#yeah ill tag it why tf not#i just dont understand why transmasculinity is scrutinized and dissected like this within the trans community#when its just not the case for other gendered trans folks amongst themselves more often than not these days#which is a good thing! a really really good thing! but why are we scapegoating transmascs#''we need more weird trans people!!'' yall cant even handle like. a pre-everything trans guy coming out for the first time#yall cant handle a pre-everything tguy wearing a tshirt without tearing him to shreds & calling him shit like afag/theyfab & ukelele boy#im tired of my identity being treated as a debate. i had enough of that in highschool as#very literally. **the only trans kid in my grade** surrounded by cis teachers & peers USING ME AND MY BODY AS A TALKING POINT#i was the only one who wasnt deeply closeted that is. and holy fuck do i still not blame anyone for being closeted in that school#why is it only okay to try to separate trans ppl from our gender when we're not fem/me#why is one celebrated and the other treated like radioactive waste **within our own community**#god i need to find an irl community fuckin badly online trans circles are hell on earth#ill be describing smth that happened to me as a clocky tguy and someone else will say TO MY FACE#that what happened to me wasnt bc i was a clocky guy but purely bc i was trans#like i. what. how. how does that make any kind of fucking sense#i wouldnt be clocky if i wasnt trying to look like my gender. like i. hello?#would u say that to any other trans person or am i just that special?
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official finish-this-sketch-how-you-want post idk what to call thisSAMPLE TEXT
hi! I miss drawing with people in a café and some folks mentioned they'd like to mess with my sketches themselves and that sounds cool so this is now a thing. if u play gartic phone this is basically the complement mode! but without the fucking ring noise that freaks you out right when you're getting into the flow of it
few things are 1/there's no hard deadline! take this at ur own pace if u do, but 2/I'll also be finishing this sketch and I estimate it to take around uhh 3 to 4 days? from the time this is posted. so if that's a structure u like then let's aim for something done in that timespan as well! and 3/if u finish ur piece and post it and want me to see it the best way to do that is to @ this blog! above all we go into this one determined to have fun and enjoy. I already bought u a matcha latte with oat milk sorry if u don't want that
here I got u today a sketch that's supposed to be Riz Gukgak (SY) (grey bg version and transparent version for ur ease of peruse)
remember to have fun & be urself & finish ur drink & see u in 4 or 5
#not art#technically#idk what to tag this... I was thinking sketchboom bc its like one sketch many outcomes yknow. but turns out thats already#a company or something like that. and then I thought something riffing on the complement game mode but I cant think of anything for that#can we call it Fuck With This Sketch. pros: it would be funny. cons: cant think of even a single one#sooomewhat in the realm of dtiys. more in the realm of process swap or whatever the drawing meme was that used to be a thing#where like u and two friends swap pieces inbetween every step#(which is somewhat assumptive of what the process is to be fair. I know people who run directly into a piece blocking out poses in colors#as their sketch. and then just render right on top of it. as an ink-for-lifer their process is alien to me and we are like different specie#I want this to be real freeform u can do anything to this sketch. its decently readable for being made by me I think#if there are more than one character it gets worse. or if its full body or a first sketch for a design. uve seen that basrar piece's sketch#and when I say u can do anything to this sketch I mean it. if ur thinking ''oh they didn't mention a bg or painting idk if I should--''#Stop. You Can Do What You Want Forever. seek ur truth seize ur pleasure and call me a bitch to my face#sky's the ceiling and the depths of hell is the bar. draw with me. that is what this is for#ok Im done lets go. hope u have fun with the sketch! yay! yayaya#edit: well now Ive commited to a stupid tag this is called#Fuck With My Sketch
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ATTENTION ALL ALASTOR SHIPPERS:
uniromantic
THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME. PROCEED
#it means you only experience romantic attraction to one person in your life ever!!#some people get their only crush SUUPER late#sooo a few decades or centuries works out fine :3#just as long as it's not a poly ship lmao.. two crushes makes you NOT uni because. uni. like. u know ur root words right#also IT IS NOT “fixing” one's aroness it is an aro identity of its own and not superior to any other identities !!!#just saying that bc fandoms fucking suck#anyway i think it'd be cute. especially with his disgust for even platonic affection. tryna be all intimidating#then THAT all of a sudden?? the agony. such silly billy blissful agony. not blissful for him but for the viewers of his suffering like us#tehe#uniromantic alastor#arospec alastor#aro alastor#alastor#hazbin hotel#FML what if i secretly put a hamburger emoji in tags 🍔 yeah that's right fuck you society#radioapple#radiostatic#duckiedeer#charlastor#what other fucking ships are there uhhhhh#idfk i headcanon him as full-on stereotypical aro whatever you call that i don't even do this bullshit#voxal#radiodust#alastor x oc#i think i am cringe.#i sincerely believe i am cringe and terrible. mayhaps social anxiety. who tf knowssss#P.S. as long as HE is not the one with multiple crushes i know polycules are whack#but ofc he could be grayro but where's the fun in that (there is lots of fun in it i am sorry)#radiorose
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hi can i mansplain -, –, and — to y'all. this is not even directed towards anyone i just have no opportunity ever to talk about this so take these as fun facts on punctuation i guess
so these are called the hyphen (-), endash (–), and emdash (—), and these are all used in different and specific ways. (also the endash and emdash are just called that because of the lengths of the letters n and m. now you know)
firstly, the hyphen (-) is used ONLY to connect words, like uhh. self-respect or something. and speaking of which, you hyphenate words whenever they are adjectives put before a noun, like a five-year-old boy, but not if the boy is five years old.
secondly, the main usage of the endash (–) is actually for ranges. when it is a replacement for "to", like the years 2012–2015 for example, or the time 1:30–5:30, you should be using the endash with no spaces before and after.
moving on to emdashes (—)! they can also be represented by two hyphens (--). so when you break up a sentence like this—to talk about extra information and whatnot—you either use the emdash (—) with no spaces before and after it as shown above, or the endash (–) with spaces. the hyphen should not be used at all in this context.
"and if you're interrupting someone—"
"—or if you're—if you're stammering and repeating words, you should be using the emdash as well."
speaking of which, you can interrupt dialogue with action (without a speech verb like 'said') like this:
"you did all this"—she gestures around her—"for me? 🥺"
there is no occasion in which you should have a space after an endash or before it.
and that concludes my mini ted talk. thank you for coming
#user: gossippool 😝#i've noticed that not many people use these correctly which i cannot blame them for because i only read up on this like last year#but yeah. i fucking love emdashes#if you ever want me to mansplain anything grammar or language related i literally will don't even test me#i hold in the urge to correct grammar about 15 times a day#what do i even tag this as#writing#punctuation
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Something something our lives are echo chambers and we just keep repeating the same motions
#I swear I didn’t try this time#I was innocently making a silly little keating post and then I saw these two gifs together and I was like hold on wait a minute hold up#cause why would they do this to us; why would they mirror the same scenes at the highest and lowest point of the movie foreshadowing it in#the wickedest of ways like thank god they cut this cause the girlies woulda gone sicko in the theatre like how dare they#the fact that it’s those same boys and it’s followed by Mr Perry saying he holds Keating directly and solely responsible like these scenes#woulda gone so much harder had they left it in the movie like bruh what the actual fuck#I’m just trying to make a silly little keating post and I have to put it on pause to share this parallel like a prophet sending a message#lord I am not your strongest soldier stop making me need to share the most devastating news like your sick and twisted little angel of pain#dead poets society#mr keating#john keating#worst part is I know Mr keating would have to reluctantly appreciate the cinematic parallels like he would give the most somber look but be#satisfied that at least it was poetic even if it was likely one of the worst tragedy of multiple people’s lives#dps#guess I also need to include the one in the coffin in the tags huh#neil perry#dps symposium
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lesbians who are terfs will never make any sense to me crying about the supposed exclusivity of the “female experience” like my brother in christ she experienced an othered, lonely, confusing childhood where she was made to feel inadequate in her gender, sexuality, or both just the same as you and instead of letting this unify you against patriarchy you just enforce it on other people to maintain the sliver of “power” you think you have. how do u not see how dumb this is oh my god
#like trans women are hurt by the patriarchy they don’t benefit from it you fucking coconuts bc even if they were ‘men’ (they’re not)#they’d be men who cannot live up to the standards set by patriarchy!!!! this is feminism 101 yet some people run their mouths like it’s 1912#like dude. she’s doing gender and sexuality in a way cishet society hates just like u are. please be fucking smart and realize attacking her#only hurts YOU and loses YOU the same bodily autonomy u wanna deny her for the sake of “’saving ur lesbian brethren’ or what the fuck ever#you’re hurting cis women trans women intersex people EVERYONE because you’re so obsessed w feeling special for being perceived as a woman#and then being harmed for it that you can’t even see that the women you hate so much experience the EXACT SAME SHIT. use ur brain!!!!!!#anyways sorry read some takes from some lesbians in LC and got way too heated. god bless u trans dykes i love u trans dykes#idk what to tag this so. ya#posts
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have been thinking about professor sol even. professor bufo with no clearly discernable lesson plan. sol bufo ostensibly martial arts professor who spent two weeks running a yoga and meditation program and shows up to the next class with crochet hooks for everyone. professor bufo who is technically supposed to be assigning grades to students but hasnt given anyone less than an A because "i think they worked really hard and they did a great job :)" (referring to the ugliest and most malformed pot holder anyone has laid eyes upon in their life). professor bufo who is on his way to cluelessly kickstart the sexual awakening of about half the cohort of the academys new students. sol bufo adjunct professor who is gone half the year and his first class back is so immediately and easily baited into going into a long tangent about how cool his friends are. sol who is pretty sure hes easily the most useless professor on campus and almost cries when he sees his little desk overflowing with thank you notes at the end of the year. professor bufo absolutely fucking gloriously hot in the tightest little sweater vest because there were faculty complaints when he wore a crop top to class.
#ramble tag#ive been. ive been thinking.#aum. ultimately i just think.#like launchpad was a place for sol that was . place where he was demeaned abused exploited endangered and used#but he needed a place like that. so badly . really it was like. what else did he have.? the lightkeepers?#sol needed a place that would tell him he had a family . and thats what launchpad was!#launchpad is. if youre smart and talented and hardworking and brave enough then people will love and respect you. and you can belong.#and even if it was conditional sol needed a promise like that so badly .... the life that he dreamed of being within his reach.#so. IDK. i just. think...... and maybe this ooc but . well its POST CANON SO I CAN DO WHATEVER TF I WANT.#i just like to imagine sol as a . like yeah he has a minus one to intelligence and hes silly and stupid and very often incomprehensible. but#like . the kind of person who radiates kindness and passion. and maybe more than anything. unwaveringly believes in you no matter what.#i think. sol is very much a person who . on some level recognises the things he lacked in his life and compensates for it by extending that#to others. loudly and proudly shouting all the time. i want to care for you protect you help you believe in you support you and love you#:-) so. despite him being a . real hot mess. i think he would be a good teacher. even if he does for some reason spend a month teaching#his martial arts class how to cook a mean pasta.#(and not even mentioning sol travelling over bahumia to find kids like him who didnt are in bad situations and need a place where they can#be kids. and extending them a hand ... giving them a home and a space to just fuck around and make silly pots instead of fghting to survive)#ahem . ahem ahem. but WHATEVER#anyway if this is ooc i dont care because . thog dont caare .#this is post canon and this is a sandbox for me to do my silly little tag-yapping
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okay yiik i.v is out so it’s time to say it again
please for the love of GOD and all that is holy, if you are going to completely shit on the game, TAG IT as anti yiik, yiik crit, or yiik critical. especially if it is in bad faith or you haven’t even played it! im not here to change your mind, but you guys Have to understand that there are fans of this game whether you like it or not, and fans across tumblr generally do not like it when you use the tag to fill it with negative opinions that are 95% of the time conceived from bad faith misinformation campaigns.
just Tag it as the tags above (or don’t tag shit at all!) instead of using our general fandom tags so some of us can filter it out, it’s basic tumblr etiquette. Come on
#and before anyone fucking twists my words I’m not saying you can’t criticize yiik#im a huge fan and I’ve got a ton of criticisms about it still. and maybe I’ll even make posts about it! maybe I’ll main tag it to discuss#with fans!#but that is NOT what a majority of people who do this are doing. Yes even if you think you are a Majority of the time you really aren’t#so for the love of God just fucking tag it and be nice or im shooting the place up#yiik#yiik: a postmodern rpg#yiik iv#anti yiik#yiik crit#yiik critical#look I even used those tags! so now it exists! fucking use it!
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here together
#lobotomy corporation#lobcorp#lobotomy corp spoilers#lobotomy corporation spoilers#abram lobcorp#i didnt know that the song that plays during day 48 ending is called 'here together'.#couldnt hear it well because i typically have my sound low (sensetive to louder sounds) and also the dialog fucked me up#so when i pressed on it to hear it. to actually listen to it. then to see the name and remember what it Looked like#i got teary eyed. sorry.#it happened quite. afew times when finishing this shitty thing#i was thinking of how camren's not quite corpse looked as if it were reaching out to him inside the container#how it looked as if she had wings. abrams words. the line from one story that was--#something like 'we were hoping it was just one big prank and she would hop out fro. around the corner with a smile on her face'#how do you move forward when all you think you cause is pain? when everything else youve done only brought to bring people you love to thei#downfall and demise inside agony and fear as they lay dying. none of that was merciful. none of that was just. they were told to carry on#her dream and he views as if all he had done was to become cruel and wasnt fit and never even began to finish what she started.#it was so striking to me. the language he used. sleeping. alseep. waken. when all the others never sugarcoated it#in lobcorp they always said it straight. 'suicide' 'killed' 'dead'. but he used something far more.. peaceful? kind in wording in a way.#softer. describing death as if it were a merciful thing. an end that suits them and not something to be afraid of. to just... sink. to slee#to be with carmen again. to put everything to an end#the place they built with their hands. to have it just... stop. not in a way of repeating and staying in the moment#but of a permanent end. to 'sleep'. to die. to just.... stop. forever. to see no more. to do no more#to not be able to do Anything for when ever he had done Something it just cause agony. cruel hands partaking in acts he so deeply#regrets. everything is just regret. it sounds nice. to move on. to just move forward. but how can you move forward when all you think you#bring to those you cherished and couldnt leave behind is pain?#ill likely move this somewhere else as well. ive been meaning to talk about abram#the rest as well actually. mostly just the few final days w abel adam and abram since i am STUCK ON DAY 49#oh dear i uh typed a lot in the tags. oops
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I think we need to blow up the mouthwashing tag on every social media site
Solid fucking agree 🚬🐴
#asks#anon#can people treat I dunno. really heavy topics with the weight they deserve instead of fandomizing them like everything else. I know the#answer but still. and the way people have done it too is insaneeee like come the fuck on you people are literally ignoring shit for your own#comfort and thus creating some evilass metatextual instances ie using anya as a vessel for your own shit (denying her agency) and ignoring#jimmy on all levels because he makes you so uncomfortable but still wanting to have just one person to blame so villainizing the shit out of#curly when he did very much so fuck up big time but was still a person who did try even if it wasn't enough and also an abuse victim but#nobody likes to acknowledge that because nobody likes the idea that an abuse victim can fuck up big time and still be an abuse victim and#there's also the matter of how people idolize swansea and go oh he would've never let this happen when bro did know what happen halfway into#the months after the crash and didn't formally do anything until daisuke died. and people just act like daisuke can't and never would do#anything wrong when he literally stood there while jimmy rufied swansea. also the whole infantalization by the fandom really takes on a#whole nother tinge when you remember he's the only asian person on the Tulpar. like. guysssss. tears my fucking hair out and kills myself.#there's a reason that the only tag for a media I've found deeply personal I've refused to follow is mouthwashing because from the shit#that's slipped through the cracks alone good fucking god‼️‼️‼️ this is the uncomfortable game about accountability capitalism and sa do NOT#fucking remove the nuance from it. jesus fucking christ😀#anyway. yea.
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OKAY! Chatot rant in tags below! Read at your own discretion.
#okay starting from the beginning of where ppl usually dislike him. apple woods chapter.#he doesn’t give hero/partner the CHANCE to explain themselves despite them being relatively good recruits up until that point.#and that legit might be my only gripe with that chapter bc!!! stories need conflict! I LIKE the conflict in apple woods!!!#hero and partner being punished so something they didn’t do!#the misunderstanding! how team skull (Skuntank) actually outplays the main duo with a clever yet rotten trick. I LOVE that it segways into-#one of the more sweeter scenes of guild members looking out for eachother. I LIKE APPLE WOODS CONFLICT.#but chatot just. not giving them a chance. is so dumb.#I’d personally fix this by having a lil montage of hero/partner fucking up on jobs. A LOT. and chatot giving them a pass every time.#and let the perfect apple incident BE the one where he puts his foot down and doesn’t listen to them. bc he’d given them loads of chances.#and doesn’t want to hear any excuse.#but yeah. I legit dont mind him during that chapter except for that really stupid and frustrating moment.#NOW. CHAPTER 17.#UGGGGHHH WHERE DO I BEGIN#Him not believing hero and Partner about Grovyle and the future being in ruin? FINE. ACTUALLY GOOD. BC CHATOT WOULD BE SKEPTIC.#IT FITS HIS CHARACTER!!#BUT WHAT DOES SUCK. IS HIM GOING ‘Dusknoir isn’t the bad guy. he didn’t do anything wrong’#WHEN HE LITERALLY KIDNAPPED HERO AND PARTNER RIGHT I N F R O N T OF HIM.#(NO LITERALLY. HIS CHARACTER IS IN THE FRONT ROW WHEN IT HAPPENED.)#and him. having the GALL to tell hero and partner they must’ve been ‘seeing things’ and downplaying the HELL they went through.#despite them being missing for hours/days. his own guild recruits. and his angry sprite showing up.#like. I think that’s when I genuinely despised him.#that and him going ‘OH I BELIEVED YOU THE WHOLE TIME HEEHOO :)’ shit was so fucking annoying.#just playing it off as a joke the second the guild started to believe hero and partner.#IMAGINE IF HE W A S ACTUALLY TESTING THE GUILD’S TRUST. SHOWCASING HIM AS THE MORE RESPONSIBLE AND RESPECTFUL RIGHT HAND OF THE GUILD.#and yes. Brine cave he saves hero and partner. but at that point I just didn’t care anymore.#he fucked those two over so much. that I didn’t care what ‘valiant’ sacrifice he had.#and he grills Team Skull for what they did OFF SCREEN. they couldn’t even give us THAT.#<<< THAT or him outright saying sorry would’ve been nice. IKIK his ‘actions’ or whatever but.#eughh again this is all imo. I’m not trying to make people hate him or change their mind.#I’ll get into positives in the second post cause I’m running out of tags
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kinda thinking about how the women who serve as maternal figures/raise kids in yyh are never quite ready for it. genkai's an arguable exception, but like.. atsuko had yusuke at 15, shizuru's basically in charge of kazuma full time in her early 20s/late teens (depending on version) with very very absent parents, and even shiori is given a kid she wasn't expecting, in the form of an old, old demon rather than like. a regular, blank slate ass human baby. and although shiori seems to do quite well with kurama, kurama can never be honest with shiori about who he is, or much of what he's seen. if he was, it'd probably make things far more complicated and overwhelming. atsuko, no matter how much she cares for yusuke, Could Not Have Been and thus wasn't ready to have him at 15. her attempts to make the most of that situation have had middling success at best. shizuru has also been placed into a parental role. we don't really know how long she's been raising kuwabara, but that's.. probably still parentification anyway. she shouldn't have to do that, and she shouldn't have to do that so young. and i think some of her coarseness with kuwa is out of frustration with her own inexperience + inadequacy + uncertainty, his not cooperating, and their parents for putting this on her in the first place. the ones who know the full extent of their situation grow desperate and it squeaks out in unpleasant ways, and the one who seems unbothered by it is the only one who has no idea that she's in way over her head. and i mean. ok. gonna preface this by saying keiko is NOT yusuke's mom in any sense of the word. but she does take care of him in a way atsuko couldn't manage to. she's often looking after him and cleaning up after his messes and stuff. she takes him on as a responsibility, and that is, in a way, a caretaker role. not to say that it SHOULD be her responsibility, but it's how she ends up being.
and when the stress of trying to make someone take care of themselves or be kind or good or Whatever goes awry, again, the violence and arguing and distance and ugliness of caring for someone reveals itself.
and i wonder about that. for a series dedicated to physical fighting as a form of communication, what does it say that this extends to the complicated, quietly desperate situations of so many of the women/girls it depicts, whom our more central characters were shaped and raised by?
hell, even hiei touches on this, because hina loved hiei, but there was no way she was prepared for him, obviously, nor for the pain of losing him. rui (whom i also see as a sort of caretaker figure to hiei, inasmuch as either of them were caretakers) literally throws him off a cliff because she couldn't face down the village elders, and out of some mixture of care for hina and, likely, fear for her own survival. and the guilt and pain of that killed hina and deeply wounded rui.
it's like motherhood, this thing that's so often treated as sacred and beautiful, is a kind of stitched up, painful, eggshell-walking thing that hurts parent and child and it's just. oughh
#genuinely begging for discussion on this bc im too tired to think about it anymore but i think it's cool#yyh#yu yu hakusho#also apologies if any of the atsuko stuff's iffy im anime-only </3 i skimmed the wiki but. it's the wiki so grain of salt#atsuko urameshi#shizuru kuwabara#shiori minamino#keiko yukimura#genkai#yyh meta#<- i never tag stuff w that but i probably should..#this is making me a little emo about all of them but on the side more quietly kurama bc like. bro he loves his mom so much and he can't tel#her ANYTHING. houghhh she will never ever know him she will live and die within his lifetime and not know any of the big beautiful terrible#life of his that she's missed. god that fucking sucks dude wait#anyway something that's only grown in importance to me is how prickly the relationships in yyh can be. like damn they do love each other#and it's even mostly a good thing. but sometimes that means you're shitty to each other. sometimes you're not great at it yk#and the characters therein are complicated and flawed without feeling like it's a huge focus. like plenty of media go here's these fucked u#guys look at how they scuttle and that's cool fr but with yyh it feels so subtle and gentle and real. it's so personal and human and i love#it. even when it means hiei doesn't reunite with the gang at the end or when genkai never tells yusuke what he means to her#y'know? that stuff used to hurt me and now it hurts me in a good touching 'god i love people' kinda way. yeah
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