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sabrondabrainrot · 9 months ago

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I finished the 87 series as a whole (except the European vacay season like I can't find it anywhere) and want to cry!!! My boys!!! I can't believe it's done!!!

What an awesome show. I might have to rewatch it just to write down more notes and thoughts. ;)

Anyways here's some headcanons about my sweet 87 boys and some show observations:

Hopefully with this people might give the show a chance. It's so delightful and charming. You won't be disappointed.

🐢🧡🐢💜🐢♥️🐢💙

The turtles are all basically 3-4 years old. They make tons of comments about living half their lives in a fish bowl and when Yoshi comes across them they're still babies. When they're shown mutating, they go from baby turtles to the older bipedal forms we know them by.

They're all identical sans their voices. (In the 87 show not only does April have trouble telling them apart at the beginning but so do the animators in every episode)

They all seem to possess super strength and some levels of invulnerability. Donatello in particular had a multiple story brick building dropped on him, which he just walked off. They've all shown varying skills such as bending metal with their bare hands. Raphael as a practical joke in one episode picks up a couch and hurls it at Donatello just to be smartass. Leonardo cuts metal like tinfoil.

They still think of themselves as turtles first and foremost, so they don't refer to each other as brothers. (despite the fact they're totally brothers) and simply address each other as friends. (They're brothers tho we all know the truth 💕)

Something not explained in the opening of the 3rd season, the turtles as babies, before they mutate, are shown with different shell patterns. While it's not obvious which turtle is which it is neat the artists went out of their way to animate each turtle with a unique pattern.

When you watch the show the amount of people and mutants that dislike the turtles is shocking. For a fun kids show made in the late 80's to mid 90's, it's basically a huge allegory to the civil rights movements and you can even take relevance to human rights movements of today.

Despite being so lovable they have only a small circle of friends. Most of those friends at some point have betrayed them too.

The boys have seen two different futures of themselves. (not counting their shared apocalypse nightmares) The first future is where they get old together in a mansion and they're heralded as heroes and everyone likes them. The second future doesn't show them but in the second future it's stated being a mutant is a crime punishable by death and all mutants are criminals regardless of deeds. This is before the red skies studio era of writing. That's before it's supposed to get edgy.

They all are highly intelligent. They can each pilot every vehicle ever present in the show despite none of them having a formal education, license, or understanding of the rules of the road. Michelangelo in particular seems to have a knack for US fighter jets.

In season 7 episode 11, titled "Dirk Savage: Mutant Hunter!" We meet two new mutants named Rahzar and Tokka. They're a gay couple. You don't believe me? Go watch the episode. I'm not pulling your leg. I swear. I promise. It's a good episode go watch it.

Master Splinter calls them his sons. He also calls Carter, his newest student, son occasionally too. It's his term of endearment.

The turtles in this version are known to get sick pretty regularly. (probably because of their still developing immune systems). They always get sick as a group and they totally soak up the pampering.

They in the first season share a 4 stack bunk bed and then after the bunk is destroyed in the season 1 finale they each get their own alcoves which they treat as their own rooms.

I didn't remember which Punk Frog said it, but one of them called Leonard and Michelangelo his Bubba which is a term of endearment for brother. The punk frogs call each other bubba too. So unlike the turtles they were either all frog brothers who mutated together or after mutating they just decided they're brothers and they also adopted the turtles as their brothers too.

Mondo Gecko seems older in this series because of his appearance but he's the same age as the turtles and actually mutated from the same ooze as them on the same day at the same time so he in 87 is like a mix of their brother and cousin? He's related regardless. (We all know the truth in our hearts)

Shredder and Krang act like a married couple who've been married too long and are on the cusp of a divorce but they've been together too long so they just keep tolerating eachother.

They all love the unhinged gross unholy pizza combos. Michaelangelo's stated combos are actually tame compared to some of the things they've eaten. One episode the boys committed to the bit so hard they ate lit candles just to mess with Michelangelo. They get pregnant sardine fudge pizza cravings at midnight. They put cereal on regular pizza for breakfast. They hate vegetables though. They literally gag when Splinter eats sushi. They refuse to eat bugs despite their turtle origins (interesting enough the Punk Frogs don't even like pizza at all first unlike them) but like they will eat out of the garbage. But not fresh handmade sushi.

They're so casual about being in public. Like they have disguises but sometimes they just go out in public as themselves. They also have so many elaborate disguises. In the first episode their first instinct to blend in was to throw on bright neon shoes, various bomber jackets, and start publicly beatboxing and breakdancing.

The turtles get called slurs by Shredder, Bebop, and Rocksteady. The slur in question is "Shellback" . When Donatello makes an evil clone the first thing the clone does is call him that slur. It's so funny like that's yourself. Donatello basically called himself ugly. Why is that so funny.

Shredders go to threat in the show and many other villains go to insult is to straight up threaten to eat them. Like, do none of the villains care about getting salmonella? Why do all the villains want to eat them?

Something I've noticed, they refuse to use nicknames. They only use each other's full names. It makes me wonder why? I theorize it's probably to do with the fact Master Splinter gave them their names and that's the first thing they received? It's not like they're not playful enough to use nicknames.

Despite his fatherly role in their lives, the turtle boys don't call Splinter their father and this is more than likely to do with the fact they see themselves as turtles and know they have turtle parents. (Again we know the truth)

April in this show is an adrenaline junky. She's also a child endangerer. She's helped save the day a lot but she would much rather the world burn so she can film it as her next big scoop.

The boys treat April like their mom in this show. April herself doesn't really get that. In one episode she got poison flowers and thought it was from the boys and went to "let them down gently" because she thought they romantically liked her.

April on multiple occasions reads bed time stories to them. She in one episode read the same bedtime story 4 times just because they liked it that much. She was going to read it a 5th time just for Leonardo.

When Zack, the 5th turtle, was in danger instead of helping him April shouted "What a scoop!" and filmed a child in a death trap.

Splinter believes in wholesome gaslighting in this show. He once cured three of them of permanent balloon-itis with moth balls but made up a story about how it was an ancient mythical legendary cure. Then after they were better he said it was moth balls.

April actually got fired from her job because she wouldn't badmouth the turtles on live television (also for other reasons). She focused on freelance while helping the boys on the side.

April is really bamf. She's actually saved the turtles just as much as they save her.

I just want everyone to know I love these little guys. The turtles are pure little snookie pookie baby bookies. No one knows the amount of space these silly little fictional turtles take up in my heart.

I hope maybe with more word out people might give the 1987 tmnt show a chance. It's really cute and funny. A super enjoyable time. It doesn't deserve the ragging it gets from other shows and fanbases. They're just goobers.

Thanks for reading my ramble list. :)

Also! if there's any fanfic recs please let me know I'm making a list and checking it twice ;)

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stina-is-a-punk-rocker · 4 years ago

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disney’s ‘the hunchback of notre dame’, early 2000s kid nostalgia, and other midnight musings

“What the fuck, Stina? I thought this was a blog for book reviews!” you say.

“Books, amongst other things. Hence the -ish suffix,” I say. “And all my mediocre ‘reviews’ are hit-or-miss in terms of engagement, so I’m pretty much free to post whatever the fuck I want.”

I toss my head. My hair whacks me in the face.

The first time I watched Disney’s The Hunchback of Notre Dame was been circa 2006, in the ‘movie room’ of my preschool, huddled around a CRT TV with the rest of my five-year-old classmates. Not much about the film particularly stood out to me at the age.

Fast-forward fifteen years later; I’m cooped up in quarantine, hundreds of thousands of miles away from that first viewing. I’m living my best life, rejoicing in my introverted tendencies and having a laugh at the expense of all the suffering extroverts. I haven’t moved from my bed all day, except for the bare necessities, and I’m bingeing YouTube videos. All is well.

I discovered Lindsay Ellis’s channel quite recently- embarrassingly enough, through her videos on Omegaverse and the whole Addison Cain fiasco. I stumbled down the rabbit-hole of her channel, and here I am, a few dozen videos later, and I find her one on this film.

Which, of course, led me to want to re-watch the film, with the eyes and mind (supposedly) of an adult. And it went far beyond and above my expectations.

The film is dark, much darker than the average Disney film of today- not just thematically, but the graphics too. Except for the first parts with the Festival of Fools and the last scene, the rest seems to have a dark filter put over it all. Obviously, given its themes (I’m pulling these out of my arse; I’m a STEM major and I have zero to no knowledge about film) of freedom and equality, acceptance of those different from us, corruption and lust- all that good shit, in other words- you can’t exactly have sunshine and rainbows. But it’s such a stark contrast from what I’ve been accustomed to from Disney; Frozen has Hans about to decapitate Elsa, but the background remains bright and light; Simba sobbing next to Mufasa’s body in The Lion King is heart-wrenching, but a few scenes later, we have an anthropomorphic meerkat-boar duo singing about eating bugs and farting and all that classy stuff, so it’s not as traumatizing.

The themes are a lot more on-the-nose than a lot of other kids’ movies (forgive me if I err, I am aged and forgetful)- cue la Esmeralda saying, “What do they have against people who are different, anyway?”- you get what’s essentially the same ��accept others regardless of their differences’, ‘prejudice is bad’ morals from, say, Zootopia, but having given the main characters fursuits makes it less obvious than in this movie.

(Or maybe I’m just a dumbass. I have no elaborate notes for this; I’m high on sugar and deprived of sleep so I might be spewing bullshit.)

Admittedly, the resolution is a bit… unrealistic. The citizens of Paris = sheep, essentially; they go from throwing fruit in Quasimodo’s face because the guards started it, to helping defeat them. Maybe there’s something about mob mentality in there, but I find it hard to believe that people who showed up to watch Esmeralda burn to death were suddenly totally cool with not getting what they didn’t pay for. But then again, this is a Disney movie, and you can’t make kids too cynical too early on. Let them have their innocence and ‘people will be with the heroes in times of peril because humanity is inherently good!’ before they realize that humanity kinda fuckin’ sucks.

The characters are some of the most human from those I’ve seen in Disney (other honorable mentions: the main characters of The Emperor’s New Groove, Moana, Tangled, Anna from Frozen). Quasimodo’s the main character (lol DUH, will I ever say anything not obvious?), and he’s so lovable, but not without flaws- he’s biased against gypsies in the beginning because Frollo’s the literal scum of the earth. To borrow from the K-pop fans’ dictionary: UwU he’s so pure!

Esmeralda sparks a bit of controversy because she’s another POC leading lady from a Disney film of the 90’s (a list including Jasmine, and, sigh- Pocahontas) who’s markedly more sexualized than the white Disney princesses. It’s not something I particularly noticed nor cared about until I saw it being brought up- I mean, the woman shows a bit of cleavage and then dances for a couple of seconds- but. I’m just putting that out there.

She’s an empowering heroine without having to belt in in your face (not me making a dig at Naomi Scott’s Jasmine from the Aladdin live action film), and I also love how her role in taking down the Big Bad doesn’t have to do with her ‘power of seduction’ (the scene in the animated Aladdin film where Jasmine kissed Jafar truly traumatized me as a kid).

Phoebus is… well, he exists. Kind of a Regulus Black archetype, but not exactly. The guy on the bad side who turns good and all is forgiven. Well, at least it’s not the ‘her love made him a better man’ trope. And he is a good guy. Even if he did spend a considerable amount of his adult years on the side of the bad guys.

Systemic oppression? Nah, it’s one or two corrupt baddies. But again, it’s a Disney film, we need everything to work out for the good guys in the end.

Let’s get the gargoyles out of the way. To reference Lindsay Ellis’s video (she’s a lot smarter than I am and breaks this down better than I ever could): yes, the comedy’s oft ill-timed and inappropriate… for an adult audience. And the primary demographic of Disney films, especially princess ones (obviously Esmeralda isn’t a princess, nor does she marry into royalty, nor is she included in the group of princesses in the dumpster fire that is Ralph Breaks the Internet, but I had a book imaginatively titled ‘Disney Princess Stories’ as a kid that included Esmeralda’s story alongside Belle’s and Ariel’s, so I’m calling her a princess), are kids. And kids love fart jokes.

Additionally, I have a theory-that-is-not-really-a-theory-but-a-pretty-obvious-thing-that-happens that the gargoyles are figments of Quasimodo’s imagination, and the, at times crass and ridiculous things they say are just the voices in Quasimodo’s head (THIS IS OBVIOUS, STINA, YOU HAVEN’T STUMBLED ACROSS A STARTLING NEW REVELATION); maybe what he imagines normal townspeople to act like.

And then we have Judge Judy Chrissy Teigen Frollo. This dude is the embodiment of pure evil. He’s bigoted and rapey and abusive and one of Disney’s most successful villains- even better than Mother Gothel, who previously held the crown. It’s rare that a villain genuinely terrifies me, especially a cartoon one. Frollo, unlike your typical fairytale antagonist who wants power/fame/fortune/to overthrow Olympus, is far more sinister; driven from deep-rooted hatred instead of plain greed. He’s so much closer to people in positions of power and authority even in the modern world, and that element of reality makes him so much better as an antagonist instead of a literal sheep who hates carnivores (seriously, Disney, enough with the twist villains- they’re not working out).

Also, Hellfire slaps. In fact, the entire soundtrack does.

Speaking about Hellfire, I love the contrast between that and Heaven’s Light; how Esmeralda is viewed by Frollo (an object to possess, “Destroy Esmeralda, and let her taste the fires of hell; or else, let her be mine and mine alone”) as opposed to Quasimodo (someone with free will, “I dare to dream that she might even care for me”).

Another argument brought up, and admittedly one I had as a child was, ‘but if the whole point of the movie is acceptance and love as opposed to lust, why didn’t Quasimodo get the girl?’ Which, years later, I realize is an extremely misogynistic way to look at it. As Princess Jasmine said four years before The Hunchback was released, she is not a prize to be won. Quasimodo is Frollo’s antithesis; he lets Esmeralda choose, and she chose Phoebus. And Quasimodo accepted that, because he is good and kind and sweet and loving. Severus Snape, take note.

On a sidenote, I’m always kind of caught out of left field when the plot in films moves really fast- I’m really not a movie-watching type; I prefer to read, and books usually indicate how much time passes from one main plot point to another, and there are little slice-of-life, filler parts that tie in to character development and moving the plot forward, but at a snail’s pace. So, whenever I’m watching a movie and it’s one important event after another, I usually haven’t had enough of a refractory period to process it.

Let’s pretend that I segued smoothly into the next part of this (already tedious and long drawn out) review.

The Hunchback is the darkest film I’ve ever seen come out from Disney. Re-watching it as an adult made me pause every so often and wonder why the hell I wasn’t traumatized by it as a kid. I mean, the whole movie kicks off with Frollo about to throw an infant down a well. And then there’s that horrifying shot of the stone renditions of the Israelite kings on the church walls. Frollo falls to his death into fire. I mean, good riddance, but still. I guess it’s because the kids’ shows of today are awfully censored and polished so kids don’t have nightmares forevermore.

Update: tried to watch The Hunchback of Notre Dame 2. Exited just as fast as I clicked on it. Disney sequels really ain’t shit (yes, I’m looking at you, Frozen 2).

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brokehorrorfan · 5 years ago

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Blu-ray Review: Amityville: The Cursed Collection

After the original trilogy, The Amityville Horror's storyline had run its course, as had its theatrical viability. The 1979 original is an iconic adaptation of Jay Anson’s allegedly true book. 1982's Amityville II: The Possession is a successful prequel that shows the murders that led to the house being haunted. 1983's Amityville 3-D rested its laurels on the 3D gimmick for a largely dull entry.

This would spell the end for most franchises (at least until the remake boom), but once the home video industry blossomed, the marketable title was revived for a spate of direct-to-video sequels. While the initial source material had been tapped, four of these later efforts borrowed a concept from John G. Jones' 1988 short story collection, Amityville: The Evil Escapes, in which cursed objects from the original house find their way into unsuspecting peoples' lives.

Vinegar Syndrome has collected the pseudo-quadrilogy of 1989's Amityville: The Evil Escapes, 1992's Amityville: It’s About Time, 1993's Amityville: A New Generation, and 1996's Amityville Dollhouse - the fourth, sixth, seventh, and eighth installments in the franchise, respectively - in a Blu-ray box set dubbed Amityville: The Cursed Collection. (The absent fifth entry, 1990's The Amityville Curse, is an unrelated Canadian production that remains out of print due to rights issues.)

Amityville: The Evil Escapes was made for television but features decent production value, including a strong opening with a rain storm and a fairly convincing facade of the original Amityville house at 112 Ocean Avenue. The Amityville Horror screenwriter Sandor Stern returned to write and direct the followup. While having one of the original creative forces at the helm is a good omen, his effort is light on scares.

The film follows Nancy Evans (Patty Duke, Valley of the Dolls) and her three children. The untimely death of Nancy's husband has put a financial burden on the family, forcing them to move to rural California to live with her mother, Alice (Jane Wyatt, Star Trek), who recently received an antique lamp from the Amityville house. The 300-year-old evil is attached to the lamp and then transmigrates to the most vulnerable person in the house: the grieving youngest child, Jessica (Brandy Gold), who communicates with her late father.

The familial melodrama is akin to a Lifetime movie, while a series of strange occurrences in the house causes further tension between its inhabitants. Naturally, the cursed lamp lights up whenever something happens. The ridiculous plot lends itself to a few entertaining set pieces, including a possessed chainsaw and a garbage disposal gone wrong. The gore in the latter scene was absent from the TV broadcast but was added for the home video release and remains intact on Blu-ray.

Duke is probably a little too old for her role, but she's good in it. The kids don't fare as well, but what's asked of them is fairly minimal. The cast also includes Fredric Lehne (Supernatural) and Norman Lloyd (Saboteur) as a pair of priests from Amityville, Aron Eisenberg (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine) as Nancy's son, and Peggy McCay (Days of Our Lives) as Alice's sister, who sets the story into motion by gifting her the lamp.

Amityville: The Evil Escapes's Blu-ray disc includes new interviews with Stern and cinematographer Tom Richmond (House of 1000 Corpses, Chopping Mall). Stern's conversation is an informative one, but the most interesting fact is that he had no idea more sequels were made after this one. Richmond details how he felt more like the lighting manager than the director of photographer, as Stern was more experienced and knew what he wanted.

Amityville: It’s About Time is directed by Tony Randel (Hellbound: Hellraiser II) and written by Christopher DeFaria (who went on to executive produce the likes of Mad Max: Fury Road, Gravity, and Ready Player One) and Antonio Toro. Its subtitle is not just a clever clock pun; the movie deals with time in rather interesting, if sometimes nonsensical, ways - including time shifts. The name also works in a metaphorical sense, as the core of the picture is about a character struggling to break the cycle of making the same mistakes.

In the film, the Amityville house has been torn down and replaced with a new development, but architect Jacob Sterling (Stephen Macht, The Monster Squad) helped himself to a antique clock. He brings it home to suburban California, where his ex-girlfriend, Andrea (Shawn Weatherly, Police Academy 3: Back in Training), is watching his two teenage kids, Rusty (Damon Martin, Ghoulies II) and Lisa (Megan Ward, Encino Man). The clock physically roots itself into their home and begins controlling the family members.

Rusty - who's depicted as a "troubled" kid in a very '90s way, complete with black clothing, an earring, and heavy metal music - recognizes that there is an evil presence, but everyone else blames him for the weird happenings in the neighborhood. While he's at the center of it, the plot successfully integrates the entire household, unlike the previous film, and the complicated family dynamic is a welcome shakeup of the formula.

Playing more like an ensemble than any other Amityville, each cast member is able to pull their own weight. Macht's role is fairly thankless, as a dog attack leaves him in failing health, but he fully commits. Jonathan Penner (Survivor) gives a charismatic performance as Andrea's pretentious psychologist boyfriend, and Nita Talbot (Hogan's Heroes), Terrie Snell (Home Alone), and Dick Miller (Gremlins) are among the neighbors who pop up.

If not for the tenuous connection to the Amityville Horror franchise, I suspect this picture might have more of a cult following. (It's easier for word-of-mouth to spread about a lone gem than the sixth entry in a direct-to-video franchise.) The most entertaining film in the set, It's About Time is a charming, if unspectacular, B-movie with a delightfully silly plot and several fun moments featuring special effects by KNB EFX Group (From Dusk Till Dawn, Scream), the most memorable of which sees a character melting into the floor.

Amityville: It’s About Time's Blu-ray disc includes new interviews with Randel and DeFaria. Randel seems to relish the opportunity to discuss the film, as he says no one ever asks about it, and praises the cast and crew. DeFaria explains that he offered to write the film as a way to get his foot in the door as a producer - which, looking at his post-Amityville resume, seems to have worked out for him.

Amityville: A New Generation eschews the franchise's traditional, suburban family dynamic in favor of a metaphorical one; a community of artists living in an urban loft co-opt. It focuses on Keyes Terry (Ross Partridge, Stranger Things), a struggling photographer who's struck with inspiration when a homeless man gives him an ornate mirror that has been in his family for generations. The mirror predicts the death of its first victim, which would be an interesting enough concept, but alas it is not consistent. Ultimately, the possessed object tempts Keyes to commit murder.

The film boasts a powerful supporting cast that includes David Naughton (An American Werewolf in London) as the landlord, Terry O'Quinn (Lost) as a detective, Richard Roundtree (Shaft) as one of the artists, Robert Rusler (A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge) as a disgruntled ex-boyfriend, and a particularly charming Lin Shaye (Insidious) as a mental hospital nurse. Although the cast elevates the material, the script - penned by a returning DeFaria and Toro - remains lackluster.

While the previous entries did an admirable job to overcome their limited resources, A New Generation looks and feels very much like a '90s direct-to-video movie; THE of the same caliber as the endless Children of the Corn, Hellraiser, and The Prophecy sequels that were being churned out around the same time. Despite a direct connection to the Amityville mythology beyond the mirror, it hardly even feels like an Amityville movie.

Directed by John Murlowski (Santa with Muscles) made the inspired choice to hire The Amityville Horror visual effects artist William Cruse to handle the elaborate mirror effects. They're all accomplished in camera; an impressive feat that sounds great in theory but looks campy in practice. The film also features cinematography by future Academy Award winner Wally Pfister (Inception, The Dark Knight).

Amityville: A New Generation's disc includes new interviews with Murlowski and DeFari, plus a commentary by Murlowski. Murlowski's chat includes a breakdown of the analog effects, supplemented by behind-the-scenes footage. His commentary allows him to go more in depth, citing The Shining as an inspiration, pointing out the similarities to Oculus, and addressing shortcomings such as the pacing and the rubber monster. DeFari discusses the challenges of channeling artists' fears on screen and offers advice for aspiring filmmakers.

Amityville Dollhouse is perhaps the most traditional of the bunch in terms of concept, though its execution goes in a different direction. In it, a newly blended family moves into a house that the contractor father, Bill Martin (Robin Thomas, Summer School), built on the original Amityville lot. Bill finds an old dollhouse - a miniature model of the Amityville abode, naturally - and gives it to his young daughter. While the girl ostensibly releases the evil, the strange occurrences begin before she receives the gift.

The eerie events start small but escalate to the point where the family's younger boy sees his deceased father, urging him to murder his family. The father appears in three stages of decay, a la Jack in An American Werewolf in London. His ultimate form is something like a cross between Tales from the Crypt's Crypt Keeper and Friday the 13th Part VII's Jason Voorhees, but he's too loquacious to be scary, delivering a few Freddy Krueger-esque quips.

While the deceased father feels a bit out of place in an Amityville movie, he is the highlight of the film, thanks to exceptional makeup by SOTA Effects' Roy Knyrim (The Toxic Avenger Part II & III). Also notable is an appearance by a young Lisa Robin Kelly (That '70s Show). The film marks the lone directorial effort of Steve White, who executive produced all four films in the set, along with The Devil’s Advocate and Halloweentown. Joshua Michael Stern (director of Jobs) penned the script.

Amityville Dollhouse's disc includes new interviews with White, Knyrim, and director of photography Thomas L. Callaway (Feast, Slumber Party Massacre II), along with alternate footage from the TV edit. White, having produced the prior three films, offers an interesting perspective. Knyrim discusses the progression of the dead father's makeup and how existing creature parts were repurposed for demons in the climax. Callaway breaks down a few interesting techniques, like a 360-degree shot with a periscope lens and the challenges of lighting a character covered in latex.

The perfect companion to Scream Factory's The Amityville Horror Trilogy set, Amityville: The Cursed Collection is available exclusively from Vinegar Syndrome. It's not as loaded with extras as some of the company's releases (there's no input from any cast members and only one commentary), but each movie offers at least a couple of new interviews. All four films have been newly restored in 4K from their 35mm original camera negatives, so they look better than they ever have. Each disc is in its own Blu-ray case with reversible artwork, all packaged in a slipcase box designed by Earl Kessler Jr., which is limited to 4,000.

Amityville: The Cursed Collection is available now from Vinegar Syndrome.

#the amityville horror #amityville horror #amityville #amityville: it's about time #vinegar syndrome #amityville: the evil escapes #amityville: a new generation #review #article #dvd #gift #lin shaye #david naughton #terry o'quinn #dick miller #patty duke #richard roundtree #robert rusler #stephen macht

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synthetictorque · 8 years ago

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so i went on this echo flower simulator thingy and:

and then:

...uh....

@fnafandundertalefan, @sushinfood, it was nice knowing you guys.

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fmlfpl · 5 years ago

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Lineup Lamentations - GW16

Our Transfers, Captains, and Starting 11s for the week!

—

WALSH

TRANSFERS:

OUT: Pope and Robertson

IN: Schmeichel and Pereira

Buying two defenders from the best defense in the league seems good.

Going to hold fire on Trent after the emotions faded with the passage of a little bit of time since the pod. I still have problems, but hey, what else is new? Not owning only one Leic player like an absolute fucking idiot anymore will probably not be bad or maybe it will be bad I'm not sure. We'll see.

GK:

Schmeichel (avl)

Free at last.

Not owning Pope anymore is great feels. Schmike doesn't make saves for his fucking life but whatever. I had the money for him and since all the expensive players are shit this year I didn't feel the need to pinch pennies here.

DEF:

Kelly (wat)

Nowhere to start in defense other than Martin Kelly.

Absolute god and legend I love him so much. Get in there Martin you're the best.

Alexander-Arnold (bou)

Trent remains...whatever. Hopefully he doesn't start so I get some points off the bench.

Pereira (avl)

New friend Ricardo is in there. Don't think I've ever owned him in FPL before and don't really have a lot of feelings towards him or about him. Seems fine, whatever.

Lundstram (nor)

Pointstram has not been pointstramming lately but they still have good fixtures and he's still playing as an attacking midfielder. No issue being patient with him.

Good fixture and I don't really buy "Norwich are good again" they have looked shit by my eye getting bossed and just happened to finish their extremely small quantity of chances they have created.

MID:

De Bruyne (MUN)

Kev has the darb..not great..but at least it's at home.

Could see him picking up a return and still fine to hold him for the long term not think much about it.

Son (BUR)

Swan looking fine hopefully he starts and expecting them to boss Burnley to fuck this weekend. Already thru in UCL so hoping he just rides the horses this weekend.

Özil (whu)

Finally is Ozil.

Still hate to see him stuck on the left wing but I love him and he makes me happy so I will stand by my man in opposition of stats and reason.

FWD:

Kane (BUR)

Maybe Kane will be good tomorrow against Burnley? Who knows. Just seemed like less of a priority to turn him into Alli than doing the GK and defense moves. Could always get a brace with some lucky shit and a pen although he is on borrowed time.

Lacazette (whu)

Laca also just looks like a very bad pick. He's probably more of a problem than Kane if we're honest here, but with a good fixture I didn't really want to take a hit in a GW where we might see rotation.

Vardy (avl)

Last guy is Vardz obv. Nothing to say about that.

CAP:

Son (BUR)

Swan cap this weekend for me. If Kane out points him I'll be beside myself, so I should probably spend the rest of the night preparing for this to become my reality tomorrow.

—

ALON

TRANSFERS:

OUT: Connolly, Salah, Gazzaniga

IN (for -4 points hit): Abraham, Alli, Ryan

The hits are lovely, dark and deep,

But I have promises to keep,

And miles to go before I sleep,

And miles to go before I sleep.

Uhh yeah so I finally got rid of Mo and I returned to the elite Tammy and I got Alli who is great and Ryan who is great so that seems great.

I guess I should address not going for Mané and instead spreading the funds around especially as me and Pod Partner both agreed that Mané is very clearly the best mid in the game... I just don’t know what Liverpool are up to for the month of December besides picking up lots and lots of points they also will be rotating a TONNNNN as Klopp did last season and this season there are even more matches. I’m not confident in Mané starting tomorrow after playing all of the 90′s and I’m not sure who is gonna start when and who is gonna get subbed early when and long story short it makes me not think of Sadio as a cap option and so I’m like just gonna enjoy the club I support being great and fuck’em off in FPL for now... I always underrate my teams and so whatever I get to just love all of the Liverpool players and be happy when they score and not think about’em for FPL. Whatevs.

And lastly I used to think that taking a -4 for a GK transfer was diabolical, after all, you only have the chance (over one week) to nullify the hit with a clean which would be ridiculous to nail in one week so it’s dumb. But despite being the lowest scoring position in the game by far it’s also the position we blindly hold for longest stretches of time so hitting out a GK who sucks dick (Gaz) for a keeper who shits bonus points on a team I love (Ryan) is actually very obvious... Brighton have good fixtures basically until March (similar to Palace’s) so over the next 15-20 GWs four points is absolutely nothing... Will I finally make a good GK transfer? Probably not so I am sorry to all other Ryan owners.

GK:

Ryan (WOL)

Wolves at home is definitely a cleanable fixture they’re a middle of the table attacking side and Brighton should boss possession.

Either way Ryan is capable of save points and bones so I’m just hoping this guy called Mat with one T from Australia can save me from my black hole of GK picks preceding.

DEF:

van Dijk (bou)

VVD just is not a good pick right now because Liverpool isn’t capable of keeping cleans right now. At least he’ll play every match in the pileup and can score a goal vs anyone. Here here to more VVDongs.

Lundstram (nor)

Don’t really expect a clean here and Sheff are in a bit of a rut but Lundy is always capable of an assist or goal and Norwich suck at defending so hoping he finds a return somehow someway.

Söyüncü (avl)

Also don’t really expect a clean here at Villa Park which is always turned the fuck up especially against the flying Leicester side.

That said, Leicester have been easily the best defensive side in the league this season and therefore you start your Leicester guys.

MID:

Alli (BUR)

New bro ready to fuck.

Excited to own Alli who is flying atm. Home Burnley is a decent attacking fixture and Spurs could score ~4 here.

Pulisic (eve)

He passes every test there is stats, expected stats, eye-test, but the points have not followed... Generally that means that the points are coming and away to Everton is a fabulous fixture to break one’s duck. Go on Puli.

Maddison (avl)

So Maddo I guess at this point I’m relatively content to just hold. I don’t fucking know man...

The points will trickle in and Leicester are good and he’s good.

De Bruyne (MUN)

Kev will break outta the funk eventually and even though City aren’t flying atm like they were earlier they will also hit their stride eventually. Maybe putting four passed Burnley was the jumping off point but we’ll see I guess.

Still feel fine with Kev and he will still trickle in points.

FWD:

Kane (BUR)

Probably Kane’s final game in my side. Him out for a hit with this fixture just seemed stupid. Could easily brace even though he’s a donkey piece of shit.

Vardy (avl)

Yeah yeah.

Abraham (eve)

Good to have Tammy back. Fucking ridiculously stupid and annoying that he didn’t price drop by like 0.5 but whatever he’s back in my side and fine.

Great fixture and I always expect him to return against all the minnows.

CAP:

Vardy (avl)

Almost talked myself into going differential cap but honestly my rank is 5 billion so I’m competing with probably lots of teams who are not on Vardy cap so the points are actually significant for me...

Trying to not be a total nightmare idiot and put some respect on my name but that’s probably a joke and I’ll probably see red again.

Hate this game and life.

—

RANDOM SLACKER OF THE WEEK: TIOCFAIDH ÁRNAUTOVIC

The words of Random Slacker are not officially endorsed by this website nor any employees of FML FPL LLC.

TRANSFERS:

OUT: Tomori, Pope

IN (for -4 points hit): Kelly, Guaita

A -4 this week, my third hit of the season and it doesn’t feel GREAT. If I’m being honest I was drinking and made the moves on a whim when I could have easily rolled this week but hey hits are fun right???

Last weeks nightmare of rico > PVA resulted in net negative points but brought me a lot of joy no longer having Rico AND it just made me even more excited about the perversity of all the Palace D. Unfortunately seems like PVA could be out for a while but I’ll deal with that later, Chelsea cleans look shaky at best and Pope has to go, WOY IN.

GK:

Guaita (wat)

New keeper new life, hoping for 6 points, expecting 2. Maybe 2 bad fixtures until late March? Absurd run… I was raised by protestants so they’ll be extremely happy Pope’s gone.

DEF:

Söyüncü (avl)

Seeing a direct correlation with xUmlaut and xCleans. Love this man and after several benched cleans he’s nailed his way into my team. Decent fixture away villa, a lot of aways for my 11 this week… lets hope my boys are in the mood to travel. I hear Birmingham’s lovely this time of year.

Alexander-Arnold (bou)

Doesn’t feel great, cleans are a thing of the past around Merseyside but loves to pop up with returns… something tells me this might be the week the clean curse is broken. Or fucking Solanke will dong idk logic left the rooms weeks ago, but for now Trent stays.

Lundstram (nor)

Sheff D looking slightly concerning recently yet the hero of this season is in my 11 every week and it’ll take a lot for that to change. Pukki will wipe the clean as per but Lundy will do bits, he always does.

Kelly (wat)

PVAs injury means I can’t quite reach the heights of perversity I’m aiming for but double Palace D has the semi ready and rocking. We’re only at half mast today sadly but my body is ready.

MID:

De Bruyne (MUN)

A lot of people dropping Kev right now, seems fine but my gut is telling me hold is the way to go. Money is aplenty anyway with all the budget options flying around he’ll tick. Can see double figures this week, expecting City to demolish United.

Son (BUR)

Son’s always good to me, he always has been and always will.

Playing a bit wider than I’d hope under Mou but I trust the points will come. He’s just good! Alli may be the way to go but feels good having a share of the Spurs mids and I’m pretty confident this a medium term hold at least, unless Mou makes some drastic changes.

Mané (bou)

Lotta games coming up and a massive one for Pool midweek, this is prime time for a rest… but everyone has him anyway so no biggie. Starting but not capping feels the way to go. A 20 minute performance could see a brace with easy against Howe’s boys anyway.

FWD:

Aubameyang (whu)

This was a very knee jerky 3 game punt and I’m lucky he’s done anything for me. Got the extremely lucky brace then a blank. He’s reverse OOP on one of the worst Arsenal sides I’ve ever seen. Any return and I’ll be ecstatic, no clue what could happen in a London derby with W. ham, could be a 1 pointer, could be a hatty – Anyway always good to have a big hitter in the last game, it gives you hope and often there isn’t much else to keep you going.

Ings (new)

This guy…this man has returned every game I’ve owned him. Over 30 points in the last 4 GWs for a budget price. What more can you want? I don’t think he stays for long no way his toothpick bones holds up to the festive fixtures but more than happy to run him out again. Lotta love Danny <3

Vardy (avl)

Does anything need said at all? We live in turbulent times, one thing I can rely on in a Vardy return. No shit will be chatted from myself.

CAP:

Vardy (avl)

No fucking about this week, double Palace D, Ings, Son and Auba are where I’m looking to gain ground. Going out tonight so I’ll be on the WKD. Ready for the party that never ends.

#lineup lambs #lineup lamentations

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joneswilliam72 · 6 years ago

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Review: Weezer’s Black Album is a musical mid-life crisis and a point of no return

Dear Weezer,

What happened?

Time after time, my undying love for Weezer has been tested to the limits — so much so that it has become too one-sided to bear. I don't typically think of myself as a glutton for punishment, but with each passing record, it seems I possess some unchecked desire toward sadistic insanity. Up to this point, I've listened to, struggled through, but somehow found some sort of value in every one of the band’s albums—yes, even in Raditude. In the heat of the moment, this relationship may seem like a forgiving one, but from the outside looking in, it’s manipulative to the highest degree.

Struggling to surpass my own denial of what the band has devolved into, Weezer consistently threatens to dethrone their infamous collaboration with Lil Wayne, and yet, I somehow find myself running back to the band that once charmed the masses in the ‘90s. Songs like ‘Only In Dreams’, ‘My Name is Jonas’, ‘El Scorcho’ and even some later cuts like ‘Hash Pipe’ and ‘Perfect Situation’ really tapped into middle-school me and many others who grew up with their music.

While we still have those songs, among others, to cherish forever, Weezer releases crap like 2017’s Pacific Daydream, and then, to make matters worse, a half-baked covers album. In other words, a painfully unaware attempt at hijacking a good meme aimed at poking fun at the band. Though it was amusing for a hot second, 2018’s The Teal Album was a clear cry for help—a wail of desperation to remain relevant in the age of memes and streams. At this point, dejected and near hopeless, I was somehow willing to give the polarizing collective another chance as the world anticipated the release of Weezer’s latest record, The Black Album. But they inevitably screwed that up too.

First off, but briefly, who in the hell thought it was a good idea to preview some of the album in a custom map for Fortnite (called Weezer World)? Waving a fleeting flag within the zenith of current pop culture will not make your music relevant again, I promise. Now that is out the way, let’s get to the music.

Though the band’s dreaded move toward poptimism and simpler song structures on Pacific Daydream was ghastly and all-but-convoluted, their power pop image that was resurrected with The White Album; it was a sound that had the potential for better results. But, to no one’s surprise, such potential has been chucked out the window. With The Black Album, Weezer tries to experiment with different sounds, only to achieve results that are staler than before - and of course, bumbling lyrics that are as dorky than anything they’ve ever written.

With The Black Album, Weezer once again sounds insufferably uncomfortable with the notion of aging by devising the musical equivalent of getting hair plugs. Just like how hair transplantation is a surgical technique for desperately aging men, where hair follicles from “other” parts of the body are removed then relocated to a balding spot, it sounds as if Weezer is borrowing from the more unflattering moments of their discography, blunderingly implementing them in a mish-mash display of pop rock, and passing the end result off as something fresh and experimental. But listeners will not be tricked by a compilation of tracks lacking in quality and spat out at the end of a conveyer belt.

Beginning with ‘Can’t Knock the Hustle’, a garbage can brimming to the rim with putrid funk rock, listeners are reminded that Cuomo is almost 50, is white and can speak Spanish? “Hasta luego, hasta luego/ Hasta luego, adios.” The track ‘Zombie Bastards’, one of the album’s lead singles, tries to make ukuleles cool again (but were they ever really?), and is somehow a lesser version of something Twenty One Pilots would produce. That’s embarrassing. Brandishing an us-versus-the-world mentality, the track’s lyrics are equally awkward and try to deliver a no-fucks-given sentiment that feels especially flaccid at this stage of Weezer’s career.

Not all is lost with the band’s latest attempt at salvaging their careers. In fact, ‘High As A Kite’, the third single released, possesses a slightly Beatles-esque feel, but classic Weezer character that harkens to the band’s better beginnings. Genuinely one of my favorite songs of the year so far, this considerably depressing ballad contains some of Cuomo’s best lyrics in a long while, “When I'm high/ And I'm giving up the nightmare chase, woah woah/ And all I wanna do is blow my mind, woah woah/ All I wanna do is blow my mind.” Unfortunately, the album’s lone bright spot is screwed over by one of the worst tracks on the album, ‘Living in L.A.’, a stale and static pop number that falls into the trappings of everything the band has been drawn to the past couple of years, Cuomo once again croons about a girl (please stop calling women girls) that he cannot obtain—surprise— and compares his yearnful loneliness to living in Los Angeles. How creative—Next!

With the track “Piece of Cake,” listeners are bombarded with a bunch of “Do-do-do-do-do-do-do/ Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do/ Do-do-do-do-do-do-do/ Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do”—enough said.

Though it features a killer bassline and the band’s best attempt at self-awareness, the track ‘I’m Just Being Honest’ is a bit too ironic to be taken seriously as Cuomo speaks of people who just can’t accept the truth. If this is what you hold to be true, Weezer, hear me out—you are getting old! The song ‘Too Many Thoughts in My Head’ is nothing special other than just another reminder of how weird it is to hear Rivers Cuomo spew the word “bitch.” ‘The Prince of Everything’ is a forgettable and dishonorable ode to Prince that is currently causing him to toss around in his grave. Ok, maybe it’s not that bad as the chorus is infectious and the lyrics prove to be not as cringe-worthy as many others on the album. Nevertheless, what seems to be a solid track is almost completely ruined by yet another “Do, do, do, do.” Stop it with the do-dos.

The closing track of this album, ‘California Snow’ is a god-awful, albeit appropriate way to conclude a bad album. An abomination to the ears, moments like these make me wonder if Cuomo and company are actually trolling us or are simply out-of-touch with who they are. In all seriousness, who actually wants to listen to Weezer dabble with trap beats and hip-hop production? Absolutely no one. Considering the above, ‘California Snow’ may actually be the worst song they've ever produced (maybe behind ‘Can’t Stop Partying’), and ought to be put out of its misery as soon as possible. How? I’m not sure, but someone, please, anyone—do something.

Given the band’s current trajectory, The Black Album may be the straw that breaks the camel’s back. I don’t know if I can go on subjecting myself to this torture and fruitless defence of this band. Weezer, for the love of God, for the good of all humanity, if you cared about making good music again or even your image—go back to square one. Stop giving a crap about fitting in and please come to terms that your age. Otherwise, drop the act and consider retiring from making music altogether. Even after this complete dud, part of me continues to hold out hope of there being a secret chest containing an album or two that harkens to the heyday, but we all know that this reality exists—only in dreams.

from The 405 https://ift.tt/2H4niCI

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365footballorg-blog · 7 years ago

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Armchair Analyst: Your complete guide to the 9-game Week 3 slate

March 16, 201811:51AM EDT

And now for Week 2, the final weekend of winter. Let’s take a list at the whole thing:

SATURDAY SLATE

D.C. United vs. Houston (1:30 pm ET; TV & streaming info): D.C. have two games between now and mid-July. This is one of them, and it’ll be played before 5,500 fans a few miles north of Washington at the Maryland SoccerPlex. So yeah, expect it to have kind of a weird feeling and a super-intimate look.

And expect – or hope, maybe? – D.C. to nail their defensive rotations better than they did in Week 2’s 3-1 loss at Atlanta United, in which they got cut up by allowing the Five Stripes to get out in transition. Much of the damage was self-inflicted from a D.C. point of view:

Armchair Analyst: Nobody loves running lanes the way Atlanta United loves running lanes. DC played themselves. pic.twitter.com/PkHhrnoi5d

— Matthew Doyle (@MattDoyle76) March 11, 2018

I’m not sure if it’s a case of United going out there in the wrong formation (they’ve been using a 4-1-4-1, which seems to have put too much pressure on new d-mid Junior Moreno) or the players not having clear enough roles. The play above suggests it’s a little of both.

Whatever happens, they can’t get caught doing the same stuff against Houston, which are one of the few teams in this league who can run like Atlanta. Give Alberth Elis and Mauro Manotas lanes and they’ll scorch you like Tito Villalba and Josef Martinez did. Give Eric Alexander and Tomas Martinez time to pick their passes, and they’ll play Elis and the rest through.

I have decided, in spite of last weekend’s loss to Vancouver, that I think Houston are a Good Team™ that will mostly do good things.

Minnesota United vs. Chicago (2 pm ET; TV & streaming info): In my Week 2 wrap I wrote in some depth about Chicago’s game this past weekend, a 4-3 home loss to Sporting KC. The main emphasis was on how SKC’s previously invincible defense looked so vulnerable which means just flip it and you have a happy tale about the Fire generating a ton of chances, right? They switched to a sort of 4-4-2 in the second half and honest to god ripped Sporting apart more than any team since Cruz Azul three years ago.

It was a hell of an attacking performance. And it was coupled with a nightmare defensive showing, one in which they made the previously punchless Sporting attack look like world-beaters.

Here’s Chicago’s puzzle to solve: Even without a pure playmaker, they can generate a ton of possession and clearly can generate a ton of attack. The way they do this is by pushing both fullbacks – Matt Polster on the right, Brandon Vincent on the left – all the way into the attacking third. When it works, you get this:

But the gamble is that you can push the fullbacks up like that and not be wildly vulnerable on the flanks defensively, or can at least scramble well enough to put a pin in it.

That didn’t happen. After taking that 3-2 lead Chicago were repeatedly exposed on the flanks, and any time their central defenders were pulled out of the middle to try to stop the ball at speed, they got roasted.

Know who loves to attack down the flanks? That’d be Minnesota United, who’ve gone full Randolph and Mortimer Duke in terms of cornering the market on wingers, and who ripped up Orlando City’s fullbacks last weekend. Ethan Finlay got both goals and Miguel Ibarra was, for the second straight week, a game-changer off the bench. Even without the injuredKevin Molino they have the pieces and the approach to make it a long day in the 612 for Chicago.

Philadelphia vs. Columbus (2 pm ET; TV & streaming info): I didn’t write a ton about Philly after Week 1’s 2-0 win over the Revs for a couple of obvious reasons. First it was a home game against what I suspect will be one of the Eastern Conference’s basement-dwellers, and second is that the whole tenor of the game was irretrievably altered by the red card(s) C.J. Sapong was able to induce out of the New England backline.

We know Sapong, who had a goal and an assist and a red card drawn, and could’ve had two more of each, can do that. Sapong’s performance was in line with what he provided in 2017 and the Union, as they sometimes did last year, looked like a functional team capable of running the game through midfield while using their target forward as a fulcrum.

The question is obviously “Was that real?” Columbus are a more dynamic and organized team than the Revs and are one of four in the league to open the season with six points from two games. They do it the same way they’ve done it for the last four seasons: By controlling the game in midfield, switching play with long diagonals, and generating tap-ins for their center forward.

I’ll almost certainly have more to say about this one in Sunday’s column.

Montreal vs. Toronto FC (3 pm ET; CTV, TVAS, TSN4 in Canada — full TV & streaming info): We all know what Toronto’s about, right? The only real note here are that they went away from the 4-4-2 diamond and into the 3-5-2 for their legendary two-leg series against Tigres, and looked much better off for it. Could probably make another note that Jozy Altidore looked like he was running in mud for that second leg, and I wonder if it’d be wise to give him some rest in this one.

The Impact are a little bit more of a mystery for obvious reasons. There’s been a good deal of squad turnover, and while they’ve stayed with one formation (the 4-3-3), head coach Remi Garde has fiddled a bit with where he’s been drawing the line of confrontation. It seems like they’ve wanted to play deeper at the start and then slowly move up the field as they round into the game, but part of that might be due to game states – i.e., you’re not going to sit deep and just wait for things to unfold if you’re trying to claw back from a two-goal deficit.

And yeah, the Impact have had two-goal deficits in each of their first two games. The fact that they’ve put some real fear into both the ‘Caps and Crew SC despite that speaks well of their attack. Of course, they’ve generated that attack in part by taking insane risks with their fullbacks, especially right back Michael Petrasso.

Here is a map of Montreal’s aggregate positions for the match 3-2 loss at Columbus. Petrasso is No. 24, while wingers Jeisson Vargas (16) and Raheem Edwards (14) are just in front of him (click the “Average Position” tab):

That is one hell of an aggressive stance, even for a modern fullback. In large part it worked, as they got a pair of goals. In large part it didn’t, as Columbus snapped out of their coma in stoppage, went right at Montreal’s right side, and drew a penalty.

TFC aren’t dumb. They’ll exploit the hell out of that space if Montreal present it to them.

NYCFC vs. Orlando City (3:30 pm ET; Univision & Twitter — full TV & streaming info): NYCFC will play exactly how NYCFC have played from Day 1 under Patrick Vieira: A 4-3-3 that presses high, strings a ton of passes together, and generates great looks for the league’s best center forward. The Galaxy took them out of their rhythm a little bit in the second half of last weekend’s 2-1 NYCFC win, but that felt more like the hosts taking their foot off the gas a little bit than any sort of systemic issue.

There are systemic issues for the Purple Lions. The big one is that the defense still isn’t fixed and the attack can’t possess the ball enough to mitigate that flaw over the course of 90 minutes. The other big one is that they’re not generating enough in attack, as their expected goals per game of 1.3 is in the bottom quarter of the league.

Getting Sacha Kljestan into the lineup for the first time should help – he’s had some big performances in Yankee Stadium before, after all. But he’s only a partial solution to just half of what’s ailing Orlando City.

Atlanta United vs. Vancouver (7:30 pm ET; TSN2 — full TV & streaming info): So the ‘Caps are one of four teams in the league that have taken six points from two games, and they did so on the road last weekend at Houston – who, remember, I think are a Good Team™. Vancouver are unapologetic about their approach to road games: They go for the smash-and-grab.

As Farhan pointed out in that piece, this means they defend deep and rely upon their ability to scramble on the backline. They clear the ball a ton – more than any team in the league:

That’s 47, just from last game. If they’re going to get a result in Atlanta, they’ll have to do something similar.

As for the Five Stripes, Greg Garza made an interesting point after last weekend’s win, saying that it’s “lonelier” being a wingback in the 3-5-2 than a fullback in a back four. He’s right and it makes sense, and that is very obviously the area of worry from the hosts’ perspective.

Vancouver have shown in each of the two weeks that they’re devastating when allowed to counter up the flanks. Atlanta’s wingbacks were both pretty good last weekend, but any time the center backs have been asked to step out and make a play this season, they’ve gotten scorched.

Sporting KC vs. San Jose (8:30 pm ET; TV & streaming info): Way back in Week 1, after a 3-2 win over visiting MNUFC, Bobby Warshaw called San Jose “the league’s most innovative offense.” I’m gonna borrow part of his analysis:

The box midfield that results offers two advantages:

It gets numbers around the ball, while providing – with discipline – strong support in defense.

It’s uncommon in MLS.

Simply put, more numbers equals more options. As the old saying about possession goes, (passing) triangles are good; there are more triangles within four points of intersection than within three points. If you want to be a passing team, you need options around the ball.

How many times in the past five years has an MLS team had to prepare for a 4-2-2-2? Not many.

The other advantage (which Bobby touched upon) is that the Quakes play without a true, designated playmaker. That means there’s diverse options in terms of chance generation, and so in Week 1 four different San Jose players created at least three chances. Nobody’s funneling play through a No. 10 here – it’s all pass and move, often around and through Zone 14.

The downside is that even the best teams in the world at that sort of thing can run out of ideas, and that it’s a “weak link” approach as opposed to the No. 10-centric “strong link” approach. What happens if one of San Jose’s attackers is having an off day? The whole thing breaks down.

Minnesota had success late in that game at Avaya by bringing their midfield up a little bit higher and disrupting service from Florian Jungwirth and Anibal Godoy. Once those deeper two in the box were cut off from the more advanced two, San Jose weren’t innovative at all; rather, they were sloppy and vulnerable.

Real Salt Lake vs. New York Red Bulls (9 pm ET; TV & streaming info): Beyond anything else, RSL were vulnerable right up the gut against LAFC in last weekend’s 5-1 loss. And here’s what New York’s reserves did in their commanding 4-0 win over Portland:

Whether it’s the starters or a bunch of guys coming up from the USL, RBNY do the same things: Press the hell out of you and hit those third-line passes designed to cut multiple defenders out of the play. Their goal is to always get you scrambling, to pull you out of your spots and make you easy to split apart. In five games across all competitions this year they’ve outscored all comers 12-2, so it’s safe to say the plan is working.

RSL have to be smarter and more committed than they were last weekend. The fullbacks can’t afford to get pulled to the ball, the central midfielders can’t commit such sloppy turnovers, and the center backs need to be more front-foot and pro-active. LAFC’s attackers were all afforded way too much time and space to receive passes, and once that happens, goals happen.

SUNDAY’S GAME

FC Dallas vs. Seattle Sounders (5 pm ET; TV & streaming info): I honestly don’t know what we’ll see from Seattle, who were injured and slow and idea-less against a bad Chivas team in Wednesday’s dispiriting Concacaf Champions League loss. They had no real plan to advance the ball out of their own defensive third:

Forget about how bad Seattle has been on the attacking end. Here is the incomplete passes starting in their own defensive half. This is awful. pic.twitter.com/8U3egJ9Z8t

— Harrison Crow (@Harrison_Crow) March 15, 2018

Obviously injuries hurt, but Seattle had enough of their core group available up the spine of the team to produce a better outing. And look at what the Red Bulls did last week while juggling lineups. Missing seven starters is not enough of a reason for the catastrophe the Sounders produced in Guadalajara.

Dallas – who haven’t been right for nearly a year now, and maybe this isn’t just a prolonged slump; maybe it’s just who they are – have to love the idea of facing such a disorganized team, one that allows huge gaps in central midfield. Mauro Diaz (who has looked good) feasts when given that kind of time and space to operate in, and if he’s allowed to play the FCD wingers into acres behind the Sounders fullbacks, this could end up being a nightmare week for the Rave Green.

Of course “Will the Dallas forwards finish those chances?” remains an open question forever and ever.

One more thing to ponder:

Happy weekending, everybody.

#block-block-188 {padding:0;} #stay-connected {border-top:1px solid #ebebeb;margin:20px 0;} #stay-connected p {margin:0;color:#4d4d4d;line-height:1.5em;} @media screen and (max-width: 730px) { #stay-connected {padding:8px 6px 0 6px;width:100%;} } @media screen and (min-width: 731px) and (max-width: 1120px) { #stay-connected {padding:8px 6px 0 6px;width:100%;} } @media screen and (min-width: 1121px) { #stay-connected {padding:8px 6px 0 6px;width:708px;} }

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Armchair Analyst: Your complete guide to the 9-game Week 3 slate was originally published on 365 Football

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notsoacademic · 7 years ago

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Edg, Edge n Edgy: The birth of a Literary and Cultural Movement because: Why not?

(Ed, Edd n Eddy 1999)*

The term ‘Beat Generation’ was first used by Jack Kerouac in 1948 (Asher 1994), and later explained by John Clellon Holmes in his article: “This is the Beat Generation” (1952):

The origins of the word 'beat' are obscure, but the meaning is only too clear to most Americans. More than mere weariness, it implies the feeling of having been used, of being raw. It involves a sort of nakedness of mind, and, ultimately, of soul; a feeling of being reduced to the bedrock of consciousness. In short, it means being undramatically pushed up against the wall of oneself.

We hear so much about the legacy of the beat generation, the Beatniks who are like the Beats but not quite the same; the Hippies who cling to the part about drugs, but without the hew of lingering gunpowder of the Second World War that drove the real Beats; and the general cultural legacy that the people of the 21st century proudly wear as thick framed glasses, not admitting to be hipster but being that just the same, still reading Ginsberg and Kerouac as if their work had just come out, yet unable to contribute to it because nothing new can be said or done (Patterson 2017).

Bob Dylan all but exclaimed: “I got in at the tail end of [The Beat Generation] and it was magic … it had just as big an impact on me as Elvis Presley” (The New Yorker 2010). It should be clear enough to just admit and move on that the Beat Generation happened and we owe everything to it. Yet I can’t help but allow my sceptical white girl voice (the one I use to push my mind further than blindly accepting the value of a literary work just because it is part of the canon): “Ok. But like, why?”. I am as ready to admit as anyone that the literary works written by Ginsberg and company were beautiful, deep and possess a magnitude of literary value, but using profane language and bragging about drug use should not seem to be enough to fuel the multitude of subsequent cultures people claim the Beat generation has inspired.

So what is this endless fascination with a handful of people who many claim have created the world as we know it? Why was the Beat generation so successful in fuelling so many consequent movements and cultures? The short answer is that before the Beats there was the war and what was before the war did not belong to them. I have decided to look at three of the main founders of the Beat Generation: Allen Ginsberg, William S. Burroughs and Jack Kerouac. These three men were each looking for something different, something new. At some point they all found themselves in New York and then found each other. And when they did, they relished at the fact that perhaps they could indulge one another by using art as a gateway to a life of sex, drugs and alcohol.

First we have Allen Ginsberg, the Edge of our Holy Trinity if you will. Simultaneously being the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit of his generation. His most famous poem by far is Howl an “outcry of rage and despair against a destructive, abusive society” (Poetry Foundation 2017). It really encompasses the spirit of the generation, wanting to be different, meaning wanting to be ‘free’. Free of society’s limitation and free to express themselves “through the heightened sensory awareness that might be induced by drugs, jazz [and] sex” (Encyclopaedia Britannica 1998). It is clear, the Beats did not want to conform to society, but really hardly anyone ever does. Therefore I believe that to them it was as much of a literary revolution as it was a way to spend “night after night /with dreams, with drugs, with waking nightmares, alcohol and cock and endless balls” (Ginsberg 1956). The whole thing seems to be about breaking patterns. However, breaking patterns is a pattern itself and when we look at Howl the patterns translate into structure through repetition, rhythm and the visual layout of the poem. Is it different? Yes. But is it new? I dare say that it is not.

Then we have Jack Kerouac a sort of symbol of the sour Edg of the three edged sword of the Beat Generation, lost at the age of 47 to alcohol (ab)use. But I guess that is the price one pays when the entry fee to one’s generation is to partake in excessive drinking. He is the author of On the Road (1957), a fictional work based on his own life, written in a confessional manner called “Spontaneous Prose”. It is a term coined by Kerouac to explain his style of writing as freed from “social, psychological, and grammatical restrictions” (Poetry Foundation 2017). It is no wonder that his work was only recognised as genius after the work of the Beat writers took off. His novel was initially criticised by his contemporaries as unorganised due to its unusual style of stream of consciousness (Poetry Foundation 2017). This begs the question of whether Kerouac would have been as successful as he was if the Beat Generation did not turn out to be as influential as it is considered to be. I suspect not. The idea seems to be that any writing is art regardless of what structure (if any) it follows. This in my opinion is true, but it does not mean that all art is good art or that all art is intended to be art in the first place. In any case, Kerouac remains as one of the founding fathers of the Beat Generation and one of its most influential contributors.

Lastly we have William S. Burroughs, the last member of our trifecta, the Edgyest of them all. He struggled with heroin addiction throughout his life, perhaps making the triple edge sword have two spoiled edges instead of one. It seem to me that if you wanted to be part of the Beat Generation and get out in one piece, the odds were stacked two to one against you. He is the author of Naked Lunch (1959), once again a fictional story inspired by his life written in a non-linear timeline making it post-modern before post-modern was even a thing (Biography.com 2017). Another piece of evidence that shows the hipster-esque nature of the Beat generation, being different for the sake of being different. But the one thing that makes Burroughs Edgy is that he was an actual “hard” drug user. While marijuana was popularised and even encouraged by the Beats, even before them it was common to be a user for according to Holmes, at the time, one in five people could have easily been identified as users (1952). And then there we have Burroughs, a real “Junkie”, a real Beat if you will. Someone to aspire to, someone who truly managed to liberate his consciousness from the binds of society.

This is how these three men are viewed nowadays. They are given credit for cultural movements that they were too old to shape or too dead to witness. And while their literary work holds merit and in many ways is brilliant, to give so much credit to three junkies who cared more about doing what they wanted than what their message and legacy was, is perhaps a little farfetched. The only legacy that I will gladly give the Beats credit for is the romanticising of drugs, the idea of drug induced creativity that holds a promise of guaranteed mental liberation to the youth. Is it true? Maybe not. But it does not have to be when it is finally an excuse to do drugs in a time where there is no original thought.

*The Image at the beginning is a reference to a meme which is referencing a late 90s and early 2000s cartoon. Due to its meta nature, I thought it would be fitting to use it to illustrate the Beat Generation. The image was altered by me and is mostly used as a way to criticise the cultural legacy of the Beat Generation in a humorous manner.

Bibliography:

Antonucci, Danny. “Ed, Edd n Eddy .” Ed, Edd n Eddy , Cartoon Network., 1999.:

Asher, Levi. “The Beat Generation.” Literary Kicks, 25 July 1994, www.litkicks.com/BeatGen.

Biography.com Editors. “William S. Burroughs.” Biography.com, A&E Networks Television, 28 Apr. 2017, www.biography.com/people/william-s-burroughs-9232376.

Ginsberg, Allen. “Howl .” Poetry Foundation, Poetry Foundation, 1956, www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/49303/howl.

Holmes, John Clellon . “This Is The Beat Generation.” The New York Times Magazine, 16 Nov. 1952.

Patterson, Eric V. “The Cultural and Literary Legacy of the Beat Generation.” Empty Mirror, 23 Aug. 2017, www.emptymirrorbooks.com/beat/beat-generation-legacy.

Poetry Foundation. “Allen Ginsberg.” Poetry Foundation, Poetry Foundation, 2017, www.poetryfoundation.org/poets/allen-ginsberg.

Poetry Foundation. “Jack Kerouac.” Poetry Foundation, Poetry Foundation, 2017, www.poetryfoundation.org/poets/jack-kerouac.

The Editors of Encyclopædia Britannica. “Beat movement.” Encyclopædia Britannica, Encyclopædia Britannica, inc., 20 July 1998, www.britannica.com/art/Beat-movement.

The New Yorker. “Bob Dylan, the Beat Generation, and Allen Ginsberg’s America.” The New Yorker, The New Yorker , 13 Aug. 2010, www.newyorker.com/news/news-desk/bob-dylan-the-beat-generation-and-allen-ginsbergs-america.

#blessay #beat generation #academic #essay #text

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joneswilliam72 · 6 years ago

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Review: Weezer’s Black Album is a musical mid-life crisis and a point of no return

Dear Weezer,

What happened?

With the track “Piece of Cake,” listeners are bombarded with a bunch of “Do-do-do-do-do-do-do/ Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do/ Do-do-do-do-do-do-do/ Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do”—enough said.

from The 405 https://ift.tt/2H4niCI

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