#what dk i even tag this

[sansuusilly]

wjen the frawing on tictok (left) looks like dougshit so u make ur own (the onne on the left wS made by a PROFESIONAL ARTIST adn duolingo even replied to gim.) (the original was mesnt to look FRUTIGER AERO bro you cajb NOT ve seriousus)

[siroldfashionloverboy]

OUR MATH TEACHER MADE US FUCKING WATCH FLATLAND THE MOVIE VERS BACK IN MIDDLE SCHOOL YOU’RE FUCKING TELLING ME THAT THIS WEIRD ASS ABSURD MOVIE THAT I WATCHED YEARS AGO WAS ACTUALLY THE INSPO FOR BILLS BACKSTORY???????

DAWG I SAW THIS MFS HELLISH WORLD

THANK FUCK ITS ALL GONE DAWG

And I was correct, they did in fact take inspo from this shit for his backstory

[skateisawesome]

at what point is an intro post necessary?

OH WELL HERE IT IS!

my name on here is skate, im a minor, im a girl, i use she/her pronouns and i have no idea what im doing!!

im in highschool so im a busy girl and i will complain about school

some fun facts about me are: i play 6 instruments and sing, i like reading, my favourite season is winter, i speak a fair amount of french and italian and i can crochet.

im also mentally ill so just prepare yourself for that!

most of my posts are about osemanverse but i love taylor swift and will not shut up about her. i am in a pitch perfect and dead poets society phase at the moment so expect some of that too and mostly i post whatever else pops into my head at the time.

my asks are open and i love answering literally anything and if you ask a question ill probably fall in love with you or smth

my tags are 'skate has words' for my writing 'skate answers' for answering asks and 'skate rants!' for rants obviouslyyyy

also my messages are open and, yes, i am extremely awkward, i would LOVE to be friends !! i need to add that i am very unwell sometimes for long periods of time and will sometimes just not respond to messages. i am sorry but ill get there eventually.

im very infrequent on here and will sometimes forget tumblr exists for weeks so im never ignoring you im just stupid and i have memory issues

if youre gonna be mean to pretty much anyone i dont really want you here. just dont be an asshole guys.

anyway have a good day !! :)

[nightgarla]

doesnt post for like a month -> comes back with obscure kids show fanart -> leaves

[nightmare8-420]

i feel like a part of my soul has been ripped from my chest and i dont know why.

[tyrannuspitch]

i think. i should read more comics.

[ophexis]

trying not to think too hard about how quickly a certain art site that shall not be named went downhill the second they started doing their opt-in/out bullshit

[ratcandy]

hey i'm talking about spider/pet death in this post and going on a bit of a ramble about it. not going into explicit details but i am talking about it and how i was feeling so. be wary

tl;dr for below is that I'm okay. It just happened very unnaturally, in a way that really sucked to watch and learn further about, and it was all very upsetting.

it's been a little over 24 hours, and I'm doing better now. Well I mean I broke out into cankersores after all the stress but outside of that I'm fine. Hoping to get the stuff together to preserve her so at least I don't lose her entirely

Actually got myself into a research rabbit hole. Because what happened just seemed so unnatural and so sudden it really didn't sit right with me. Honestly it hadn't sit right with me for about a week beforehand, because she'd been acting so strangely I just didn't think it could be normal. But finding anything about it was difficult, so I chalked it up to her losing her grip with old age and just having troubles holding onto stuff in her enclosure.

But with it gradually worsening, and how she passed, it was... No, that was not old age. I'm not going to go into detail because I still get a bit upset about it, but it's... There's just no way that's how it goes. I refuse to believe it's that agonizing. I don't think I could own a spider again if that's how it ended every time.

So after rummaging through google, reddit threads, various forums, and youtube, I figured out the most likely culprit was something called dyskinetic syndrome or DKS. Apparently it's a little understood, uncommon series of symptoms that usually leads to a spider/tarantula's death within a few days. And after finding videos of it (which I do not recommend watching if seeing animals in pain is hard for you; it's very upsetting), yeah, it was exactly how she was behaving. She had every bit of it.

What frustrates me more though is how there's no agreed upon cause. I've been wracking through my brain trying to figure out what I could have done different for her (because of course, my brain jumps to "this is my fault somehow" with anything like this) and the uncertainty about all of it is so. Frustrating. Some sources say insecticides cause it (which leaves me questioning a million different things wondering how in the world she could've got poisoned), others say it's genetic (which makes a bit more sense to me, especially seeing another story that very was similar to mine in a few other aspects), but it's like. "We don't know!!" and I'm like what do yoU MEAN you DON'T KNOW.

I'm half tempted to reach out to the spider biologist at my uni just to ask him what he knows. Because this is going to drive me crazy. Watching it happen was devastating enough, especially seeing as most spider/T owners will euthanize before its gets too bad because it's just so awful (and now I feel bad for letting it drag out as it had), and now i'm left here triply unsatisfied because I don't even know what caused it.

I can theorize forever (and I probably will) but I'll never know for sure. And it's like. What the hell, man. She deserved so much better than to go out like that

Maybe I'm way too passionate and emotional about a little jumping spider. But girl after like 3 nights straight of constantly supervising her and doing whatever I could think of to make life easier for her, and then her going out the way she had, it was like. Getting slapped in the face out of nowhere when you thought you had at least a month or two left.

Good lird. What a first experience

[marciliedonato]

Currently fighting with someone in the pmore SA/LatAm tour post comment section bc apparently the UK is all of Europe and ppl from Europe don't get to ask to have a good time bc bri'ish people only think abt themselves and as long as they get what *they* want that's all that matters I guess 💁����‍♀️ woe is me 🙄🙄

[ellsellmesoull]

Hi sweetie! I hope you’re doing pretty well! just wanted to ask a favor for some help if you could possibly help me spread the word for my cat please? Pls help by boosting it or by reblogging, im really sorry cause I know this is kinda strange, pls send me a msg to reply :(( or answer the ask privately if its okay, I hope you’d consider, I’m sorry for being so desperate. 😭🙏

HEYY im sorry to hear abt ur cat hope things are getting better i dont usually use my pc for tumblr

totally didnt see ur ask untill now

i dont get many asks and this tumblr eating asks but not on desktop have happened before

omg i really hope its better now but idont really know what happened

[basiltonpitch]

not to be like. emo or whatever but. how am i supposed to live with this feeling for the rest of my life

[jaxonnlol]

i have such a big crush on this man. kinda glad he doesn't have tumblr or else I'd have to explain myself....

[itsalwaysdark]

having a midlife crisis atm i think i might start reading [redacted] this is rly scary for me keep me in your thoughts

[rainingincale]

Love when you're watching a movie and the whole time youre like 'what the fuck is this movie about'

[dreamingkatfish]

Drunk/tipsy again and feeling hella introspective. Tbh tbh, if we're being realistic, I'm constantly introspective, /however/, normally all that introspect stays in the ol' noggin, but that's all besides the point. I'm feeling sad in the grieving kind of way and /that's/ the point of this.

My thing is just the constant realization that it's only when I'm drunk that I'm at peace with myself and it's only when I was blackout drunk that I could have a truly restful night's sleep. Making all signs point to what I need more than stimulants (bc the adhd) is depressants. I need to be slowed down. Except I looked into that... depressants even as, specifically, a prescription drug aren't really a thing bc all the negative effects but also bc people build a tolerance to it fast, causing it to become addictive fast.

Which sucks because where the fuck do you even begin with that then? Like fucking having to break yourself to feel peace let alone get some actual rest. I no shit can't remember the last time I woke up feeling okay and awake and ready to face the day in a normal and not manic episode way except for after a night of half of one of those tall bottles of whiskey. How fucked is that? How fucked is it that I stop dragging myself to the grave over ever single mistake and screw up no matter how big or small or how much time has passed is while drunk?

The fuck you even do about that? Ignoring as well my shit ass luck in regards to getting a therapist that either isn't a) useless, b) in need of losing their license, or c) actually responds back about setting up a second appointment. Just it's all so... fucked.

For survival's sake, I won't ever give up hope that shit gets better, but also, /fuck man/.

[relthebell]

So I don't know how much this complaint applies outside of Denmark, but I also don't care. Parking fines disproportionately punish people with adhd for having adhd. I forget to set the little clock or app? Here's a big fine. I lose track of time. That's a fine. I accidentally broke a rule I never knew of and isn't on the signs (because I forgot to do something tedious)? A fucking fine.

And that's shit that happens to everybody. But it happens 1000x more to people who have perforated memories. And it's just... it's not fair to punish people for their disabilities. Adhd and autism are already expensive disabilities without adding fines for being disabled on top. And it's not that I have a problem with the regulations themselves, I don't mind paying to park or only being allowed to park for a given amount of time, they're mostly rules that make sense and have a reason, and I have automatized all the parts of participating and payment that I can to make it less likely that I forget, but I forget! I forget everything! And I especially forget monotonous details and routines and things I have done a hundred times before! And it's just... it's not OK to punish people for easy mistakes that happens to everybody, and it's not OK to punish people for their disabilities.

And I can't do anything about this. I can't campaign for a change to the system, I can't talk to someone else who can, I can't... I can't even complain that the fine is unjust because giving fines has been outsourced to a private company who don't have to listen or care.