#what can i say i love a guy who gets depression
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“Great, welcome mr. Wayne.” Danny sighed when a man who introduced himself as Bruce Wayne entered the shop. “So happy you could make it. I’m Danny, I’ll be doing your reading today.” God, one ounce of energy less in his words and he wouldn’t be only dead on the inside anymore.
The man beamed at him. “Amazing to meet you Danny. Say, I’ve never seen you here before, are you new?” The man asked jovially.
Danny grimaced. “Yep, now please follow me.” He was going to get so nauseas from those damn fumes back there, he just knows it. With how shit had been going, he’s going to throw up that one sip of milkshake he managed before yesterdays disaster on those fancy ass shoes. And that man couldn’t stop smiling and touching every damn little trinket on his way to the back.
“And what is this,” Wayne asked holding up a shiny trinket, immediately dropping it and picking up the next one, “fascinating, and this? Is this a spell book, how peculiar.” Danny was going to add another shade to the collection here.
He finally reached the room. “Sit down over there please mr. Wayne. Now, what exactly did you want to achieve when coming here?” He asked. The only thing miss. Claire told him to actually do before the reading.
The man actually seemed to become bashful at that, a bit nervous. He wrung his hands before rubbing one of his hands over the opposite wrist. “I was actually hoping to talk to some resently deceased people. A friend of mine died and but was very fond of this shop you see.”
Danny held in the sigh. Great, it was most likely the woman with the pearls floating behind him. “Let me guess, lady, dark hair, nice pearly necklace.”
The man seemed caught of guard for just a second before becoming it seemed angry. Or just very very sad. “See here young man, I will -,”
“Yeah yeah, save it.” Was he being an ass? Yes. Did this man deserve it? Most likely not. Did he care? No. He just spend the entire night trying to find shelter for the rain just for it to either crumble, leak anyways or in one kinda memorable occasion, blow up. So no, he did not care that he hurt some Vlad’s 2.0 feelings. The woman eagerly began speaking so he just repeated what she said. “Great, so she wants you to not let the Matt hatter ruin Alice in wonderland for you?” Danny looked at the lady like she had gone crazy. “Really, that’s what you’re starting with? Anyways.” He sighed.
The man had become silent at that. “Also, we I ask Alfie?” He looked at the spirit lady who nodded enthusiastically. “Give you the book he wrote named ‘how to navigate social situations: a step by step guide’ and use it to finally have a good talk with her grandson.” Okay, so rich dude had family issues. None of his business. “And, in her words, ‘chance the time on the grandfather clock, this is just getting depressing’ whatever that means.” The man was just silently staring at him now.
Another ghost tapped the lady on the shoulder before he turned to Danny too. “And great, another one joined.” They linked hands. “So it’s a date now, great.” He grumbled more to himself. So it was two friends who died and not just one. Okay, he could deal with that. “He says that they will always love you no matter what.” So it was a lovers affair instead of just friends? “And that the name you’re looking for is Edward Colson? Sheesh, was this a murder or something.” The two were getting more exited and talking his ears off.
“One at a time please.” He glared to mr. Wayne’s left. The man glancing behind him, predictably seeing nothing. “Anyways, was that what you came for? Or do you need anything else?” The man seemed to have actual tears in his eyes.
“You can see my parents?” Danny snapped his eyes to the two who looked sadly at their apparently son. Well, that explained the fashion choice. Also, that was almost worse then a love affair murder case.
Danny just stared at the man and didn’t really know what to say. He was translating this guys dead moms words to him. Ancients, he was an asshole. Stupid, idiotic, moronic move Fenton. Great, how to cut this off as soon as possible. “Only for a while. The power in this room will fade in a bit.” The man was a totally different person now. Danny hesitated. “Do you want to say anything to them?”
He thinks he had much more tact just now than in the past 10 minutes. “I’m sorry.” The two ghost seemed to decent on the man. Cooing at him, telling him he was not at fault, that he couldn’t know, couldn’t have done anything, was only a child when it happened.
“Ah screw it.” Danny said before making just the tip of his finger invisible. That should contain the spirits becoming visible in the area, right? He was still debating wether this was a mistake or not while the spirits of Martha and Thomas Wayne became visible to their sons eyes. Ancients he needs Jazz.
I’m a Size Medium, Thanks.
Danny is irritated. No actually he is beyond irritated. He is annoyed, he is frustrated, he is…. He’s really fricking irritated and can’t be bothered to remember any more of Jazz’s SAT words.
He continues his glare out the window as he searches for his straw with his mouth.
He just- where is it- thinks it’s a stupid fricking-stupid ass milkshake-he shouldn’t have to basically-gah! Danny snaps his head down to find his suddenly missing straw, only to successfully poke it directly into his eye.
“Ow! Fricken-“ He groans, throwing his head back, and putting his hands to his face, “Mother-tucker, Holy Taming of A Shrew!” He pounds his free hand not cradling his eye on the table, trying not to make more of a scene. Of course, this utterly fails because it immediately tips over his milkshake glass with a clatter as it spills onto his pants, making him jump up with enough force to knock the table over and drop the milkshake glass the rest of the way to the floor.
Danny stares at it with blurry vision and a watery eye. He sighs, “At least-“
The glass shatters.
Danny sighs again, deeper. “Of course.”
He looks up at the restaurant around him. Noticing the many, many people staring at him.
Wonderful.
Danny grimaces, “Sorry, I so didn’t mean for that to happen, uh-“ Danny reaches to straighten the table, fumbling for a second before it stands upright, he steps away from it, “If there’s any way I can help or.. like fix it. I can pay for the cup..” a server comes over to him, “if you want..?”
The server’s dead eyes don’t waver as they silently place a wet floor sign over the spilled milkshake.
“Thanks.”
“Uh huh.”
The server walks away, leaving Danny to sigh all on his own. He leans over to grab his backpack from the booth, checking it over for milkshake before slinging it on his back, thankfully clean.
He makes it one step forward before he feels the floor go out from under him. Ah gravity. His greatest enemy. This is karma for all those times he’s ignored it, isn’t it?
The wind is knocked out of him when his back slams to the floor, cushioned by the dulcet sounds of his bag crunching against broken glass.
He looks up at the wet floor sign.
The man on the yellow plastic mocks him.
Danny sighs.
He curses his stupid luck.
He curses this stupid city.
Then he curses himself because he knows any of this stupid city’s curses end up affecting him anyways.
Danny gets to his feet, ignoring the feeling of milkshake on his hands and his… everywhere.
He trudges out of the diner without looking back. At least he’d already paid for it.
He grimaces at the milkshake handprint on the door, trying to wipe it away with his shirt and only succeeding in making it worse.
Danny catches the eyes of the server inside, staring at him, eyes progressively more annoyed.
Danny puts his hands up in surrender and backs away.
Directly into a person. Only his milkshake covered self prevents him from being hit with anything more than the man’s scathing glare.
He puts his hands back up and moves away to dodge everybody else on the sidewalk. Along with the occasional ghost. Visible only to him of course.
By the time he has managed to escape the sidewalks into an alley, he is certain there is a trail of slightly sticky businessmen behind him.
Danny crouches to swing his backpack down in front of him and take stock. Okay, he could put his sweatshirt on over it… but it would also get ruined… damn it.
Danny looks around, checking every inch of the alley for cameras and then backing himself into a corner just to be safe. The flicker of intangibility is barely noticeable except for the wet squelch of milkshake remnants dropping to the alley floor. Lovely.
And of course, the flash of every single Gotham ghost in the area becoming visible and almost tangible for a split second. Also… lovely. There’s a couple startled shouts on the street.
Maybe an alleyway was not the best place for that.
Danny slides his sweatshirt on over his shirt to at least pretend like he was covering a mess and then shimmies out of the alley while trying to make as little contact with ghosts as possible.
He’s almost completely certain he looks crazy as all get out if the stare he gets from a passerby means anything.
Of course… now he’s left glaring across the street again.
He can feel the Infini-Map burning a hole in his backpack. It said this was the next place a natural portal would open and get him back home.
It just didn’t say… when that portal would open.
But of course, it’ll be right in the middle of somebody’s store. Usually not an issue. Except again, this stupid city’s curses are attracted to his energy, so of course the store couldn’t be literally ANYTHING ELSE!
Danny glares at the stupid fricking sign and the stupid predictable pun and the stupid neon hand in the front window waving at him.
‘The Claire Witch Project: psychic, medium, and Claire-voyant’
Danny is on day three of simultaneously avoiding the entire building while remaining close enough he can be there when the portal forms.
He is dirty, tired, and running out of money. In short, Danny is starting to lose hope on this endeavor.
The worst part?
He has the perfect solution.
There’s a pathetic little piece of printer paper taped to the inside of the window.
‘Help wanted’
When he’d first gotten here, Danny had followed the infini-map all the way to this horrific city, seen the sign, and turned a quick 180. He’d rather die again thanks.
He’d smacked into two billboards just coming into the city, and there was literally no stars, why would he want to stay here till the portal opened when he could just find another?
Except.. Danny’s eye twitches dangerously as he thinks back on it- except there wasn’t another portal. This was it. For the foreseeable future, he either caught this portal or was stranded for whoever knows how much longer.
Danny sighs again and dreads his continued existence. He looks both ways on the street, takes a step forward, nearly gets run over, steps back, and turns for the nearest crosswalk.
Fine. He could follow rules if it meant increasing his chances of leaving.
He tries to hold in the sigh this time, he really does, he swears.
Not the one before he opens the shop door though, that sigh deserved freedom from his trials. It joins the myriad of whispy translucent shades lingering in the store. Because of course there was just enough spiritual energy in here for them to be visible to him.
“Hey there!” A girl in loose fitting colorful clothing appears from behind a corner, “I’m Claire! How can I help your life journey today?” He can see the way her bulky crystal hair accessories sway with her movements. What was he getting into here again?
Danny tries to ignore the incense shoving itself up his nose as he speaks, “Hey, I was…” He was really doing this huh? “Hoping that the help wanted position is still available?”
The girl looks him over as she moves to the back of the checkout counter. The clear observation makes him nervous, and he takes his hands out of his pockets to try and look marginally more… candidate-able.
“You have experience?”
“Sure d-“ He wants to throw up in his own mouth, ancients this is so cringe, just let him die, “Sure do!” He says through choked back vomit and false cheer, “I’m a…” -barf- “I’m a medium.”
“Oh don’t worry about that, you don’t need a uniform, I don’t need your size silly!”
Danny blinks. What? Also. What?
“Wait-I’m hired?”
Claire pauses from getting something from under the counter, “Didn’t I already say that?”
“Uh…” Danny’s eyes dart around the shop, “No?”
“Oh well, you are, you have the right vibes, don’t worry,” she slides a few papers onto the glass counter, and Danny is abruptly, horrifically reminded he has no legal documents to speak of here. He thinks. He hasn’t actually checked.
Crap.
“Of course, most of my clients pay in cash, so I’ll pay you in cash too just to make it easier, and any crystal sales I’ll just add to it. Sound good?”
“Sure?” Oh no, is this gonna be Danny’s first real job? “But I don’t know anything about crystals. I have a goth friend but she’s not into that stuff.”
Claire waves his comment away, “Oh no worries, I can leave a packet.”
Danny nods, “Thank- wait, sorry. Leave?”
Claire laughs, pulling out a bag from behind her counter, “Yes I leave for a trip in two days. Family things you know,”
Danny feels like his brain is being scrambled, “Oh, what, what happened? Is everything okay?”
Claire looks at him, blinking wide, “What? Why would anything have happened?”
“Because… you said, you were leaving for-“
“Just don’t want to get caught in a bad position, you know how it is.”
Some of the shades stir in the air, their misty movements twitching with agitation enough to draw his eye for a second.
“Right. Well I’m glad I came when I did then,” Danny says, because he still doesn’t want to be rude.
Claire smiles at him.
Danny pats his hands against his sides awkwardly, trying not to look up at the movement of the shades intertwined with incense smoke at the ceiling.
There’s a little jingle behind him, which he belatedly realizes is the door when Claire moves to greet them before he can even turn around.
“Ms. Jives! Wonderful to see you! How’s the goldfish?”
Ms. Jives turns out to be a slightly older woman, maybe early seventies with a cane but she looks good. The coffee brown hair is almost certainly a dye job but it frames her wrinkled face well.
“Oh Jim is lovely dear, much better this way, I bought him a new plant just the other day, he just loves it.”
“Good, here for your reading right?”
“I am! But you can finish up with your customer first if you need,” Ms. Jives says. Claire waves her concern away.
“No need, this is Danny, I just hired him, he has a similar mystical connection.”
“Oh that’s lovely,” Ms. Jives says as she passes by him, “Would you like to come with dear? Claire is going to do a reading for me.”
Danny grimaces, “Sure.”
In the end, by the time Ms. Jives makes it slowly to the back room, Danny is trying to think of where he’s gonna sleep tonight. He mostly zones out when Claire dims the lights and starts talking nonsense.
All he heard was “something something card, something something magician something reversed something something balance something something chihuahua.”
Ok, maybe he wasn’t listening. But he was trying to focus on not staring at the movement of the shades, and the incense was mega strong and Claire had some weird ass music playing. He’s almost certain she’s faking everything. Down to the atrociously bright bead earrings.
Danny sags when she finishes, all too happy to leave the weird little curtain covered room.
He stands in the front awkwardly while Ms. Jives pays, twiddling with the various crystals and trying to figure which ones are actually y’know.. mystical or whatever.
Answer? Surprisingly most of them. That he could tell, at least, but it’s not like he actually knows how to sense that out on purpose. He’s pretty sure a couple of the heart shaped rose quartzes are complete duds but what does he care.
He’s thoroughly bored by the time Claire calls him back over. Apparently to tell him that he’ll do a reading tomorrow.
“Tomorrow?!” Danny blurts, “Don’t you want to like- I don’t know, make sure I can- or like.. I don’t know, but tomorrow?”
Claire just smiles at him, “I believe you can handle it, trust me.”
‘Trust you? Lady, I just met you and you’ve been nothing but crazy the whole time!’ Danny wants to say, instead, he keeps his mouth shut and nods with what he’s sure is fear in his eyes.
Then she’s pressing something into his hands and when he looks down it’s a key. A key. There’s no way-
“So be here 9am sharp, Danny! You can open up and I’ll come in later!” Claire starts pushing him towards the door, “And Mr. Wayne should be waiting for you when you get here!”
Danny turns around to catch himself in the doorframe, “Mr who will be what now!? Wait, Ms. Claire, Ma’am- why-!” He stops to lower his volume and ask politely, “Why am I doing this? You don’t even know me,” Danny says, one leg still in the store.
Claire smiles, “Because the universe told me to silly! See you tomorrow! Here’s my number!” Then she slaps a sticky note to his chest with enough finality that Danny takes a step back. The door closes with a click and ring of the bell inside.
Danny stares at the door with his eye twitching for at least a minute.
What the hell did ‘the universe told me to’ even mean, you kook!?
Danny sighs and looks down at the sticky note, quickly inputting the number in his phone before something happens to it.
He’s barely hit save when he finally steps away from the shop front and…. is immediately drenched to the bone.
Because apparently it’d been pouring rain and he simply hadn’t noticed from under the awning.
He watches as blue ink slides off the sticky note in little sad face streaks.
Danny sighs.
#don’t know how that came out#written on a phone so ignore any mistakes d:#batman#danny phantom#danny fenton#dc#danny phantom crossover#bruce wayne#Danny being done yet didn’t think of lying to get rid of frootloop number 2#Bruce is shooketh#the universe is laughing tho#debatable if it was clockwork or just an unknown god somewhere from dc
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What's your opinion on how Telemachus was handled in Epic (so far) ? I'm curious 😀.
And what is different from his Odyssey portrayal ? Not counting the fanart that infantilizes him, I'm strictly talking about the musical itself.
Hahahaha you guys definitely wanna put me against a wall one of these days! XD But I absolutely LOVE this question! Hahaha okay here goes;
Absolutely I wasn't gonna talk about the fanart and all that is part of the designing process and arguably that is part of every person to do. They could easily choose the depiction more Odyssey-accurate and still use the musical sound so yes you do well to mention it because yes I myself wouldn't touch the design part in this ask
Anyways long story short; I don't like it.
Storywise it is overly-simplified and shows only one portion of his possible emotions; the one that tries to connect with his father. That part is genuine and I see where the portrayal such as the song "Legendary" came from. Arguably Homer himself also touches the subject of glory through one's deeds and I see where the musical came from when Telemachus says what he says but the song was too bbbly, too naive portrayal of Telemachus and in a way completely disregarded the true depth of sadness and depression in Telemachus.
In the Odyssey Telemachus never connected to his father because his father was never there. To the point where he was even doubting whether he was his son or not. He basically says that "everyone calls me that but how can I know? The dude was never there. Possibly never will be here again". His whole energy was the total opposite than Epic.
Epic portrays Telemachus in a manner that reminds me of Disney's Little Mermaid in "Part of your world"; a bubbly teenager who dreams to start his life or to be making a legendary name for himself like his father and in childish naive energy says "bring me all these monsters to fight them!" while in his childish naive nature was also making him afraid or worried to face the bullying of the suitors (the way the suitors were portrayed as if Jorge wanted to make them EVEN MORE evil also had me cringe like Antinous calling Penelope "tramp". Antinous called Penelope more or less "divious" because of her scheme against them but that was all. In here they are competing for her hand while calling her names without reason? Yeah right....). He seemed like the average teenager that needs the adult to get him to realize video games is not the life and that he needs to do something about his future! Does he also seem low-key sad? Yes. But just like Ariel in the Disney movie was pictured as a dreamer that wanted escape from his confided situation through bubbly and childish dreams.
Odyssey Telemachus was both emotionally and psychologically exhausted; his mother was taken down by grief and endless waiting and had confided herself in her chambers, trying her best to avoid the suitors that were at her home for FOUR YEARS, constantly crying at this point. Telemachus also saw his grandfather lose his mind in sorrow and his grandmother melting away by desperation and sadness and dying or potentially killing herself by it. The last thing he wanted was "to be legendary". In fact Telemachus gave me the exact opposite energy than a dreamer. He was very down to earth and his main goal was to get out of this nasty situation, trying to grow as a person to set himself free from this torment. He had so much in his plate that the last thing he wanted was to dream. In fact he gave me the impression of a person with no more the luxury of dreaming. He almost seemed crushed to the point of breaking himself almost like every other member of his family. (He gives me the impression of a person that after spent years of trying and fulflling their dreams now they are forced to work in a work they hate for survival and think that "dreams are for fools. No luxury for them!")
Like I said Menelaus described Telemachus as a spitting image of his father including his eyes, which is something I find the most important. Menelaus compared Telemachus's gaze to Odysseus; a man that fought a war with him! A man exhausted by the evil he saw and caused. Telemachus's profound grief was so intense that his look was equivalent to a man Menelaus fought a war with! He was the opposite of what we see in Epic! In fact we know that Telemachus was also very much silent and tried to keep a low profile so he didn't need to face the humiliation of the men that were literally plundering his wealth and harassing his mother and himself. The last thing he had in his mind would be to "be legendary". He was also plundered by the fact that not only was he doubting that Odysseus was his father per se but also he was in doubt that this Odysseus that everyone named his father would be alive or dead. He didn't know that. He was actually almost certain that Odysseus was dead but that part in the back of his head was not yet leaving him in peace which is why he needed Athena's guidance
Which brings me to the next part; Athena In Epic Athena appears to...give Telemachus the boost to fist-fight the suitors for some reason and mind you he still gets his ass handed at him! It made it seem as Telemachus's only problem was that he didn't have the guts or skills to fight the suitors and Athena gave him a solution! (potentially a message to stand up against bullies for teenagers? Perhaps but still I felt it massively undermined Telemachis's situation in the book) As I have answered to another person around here, Telemachus's problem was that the suitors claimed the law of hospitality and named themselves ODYSSEUS'S guests. Telemachus could not yet take over as king and he had no power to send them away. Plus he was plundered by doubt about his own inheritence. What Athena did was not to make Telemachus a fighter for he already was (we see how well he stands against them at the side of his father in the Odyssey) she came to encourage him to find out on his own.
Arguably the trip of Telemachus was a mirror counterpart of Odysseus's but instead of a trip that makes you lost like Odysseus was lost, it was a trip for self-discovery. Mind you, both the trip of Odysseus and the trip of Telemachus are cognitive trips; both characters learn in them and come in contact with places. Psychologically the trip allows Telemachus to escape this boarderline toxic grief in his home and explore the world. Also find out on his own information about his father. Now, arguably he never really finds out about his father's whereabouts for certain apart from Menelaus's vision but there is something he definitely gets out of his trip that is not talked about enough;
He finds out he REALLY is the son of his father and he gets information about what kind of man he was!
He hears from friends that fought with him how similar he looks to him; not just from his closed and secluded environment but of people outside his circle and his known people that he looks like him and they also give him information about him. No more the random comments the suitors he hated say or his sad mother who could either idealize his father to escape her grief or the loyal slave Euryclea who adored the family naturally like a mother; now it was also friends and known people of Odysseus that speak about him Telemachus is double-checking his information! Thus coming home much more confident on his inheritence and his own destiny and duty
Arguably the Odyssey is as much Telemachus's story as it is Odysseus's. Telemachus was in one way a spectrum of Odysseus; fighting a different type of war; losing himself in a different type of sadness. His story was a story of coming of age not a story of a goddess that teaches him how to stand up against bullies. Telemachus already does that in the Odyssey by calling the council. Arguably he was alays standing against the suitors but his position did not allow him to do something drastic! I think just like many things Epic missed this by a mile; reducing Telemachus's profound grief, sadness and uncertainty to an average teenage escapism story rather than the fact that Telemachus had no luxury or energy for escapism, Athena's advice for self-discovery to the average "raise your fists and fight your bullies" story ignoring the deep cultural details that led Telemachus to that tight spot in the first place and of course it completely abandoned the importance of Telemachus's trip which could be a subject of a movie on its own! (Quite frankly Telemacheia covers more chapters in the Odyssey than Odysseus's own flashback! It covers 5 rhapsodies of the Odyssey while Odysseus's story covers 3-4)
I hope this answers some questions! I will be happy to elaborate more.
#katerinaaqu answers#greek mythology#tagamemnon#the odyssey#odyssey#homeric poems#telemachus#athena#epic and odyssey differences#telemachus analysis#telemachus was a profoundly sad and depressed character#his depression is rarely ever shown#katerinaaqu analyzes#telemacheia#penelope#anticlea#laertes#euryclea#antinous#the suitors#odysseus#telemachus and athena
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Ep 26 loose (and rambling) thoughts
I find it almost comical how Chongwu Camp took over the whole shapeshifter case and everyone just nodded and went home. What is Fan daren even doing? Playing weiqi with the Situ guy, instead of actually running the Demon Hunting Bureau so that it doesn't look completely inept in comparison?
Aww look at WX waiting for ZYC to come back! It's kind of interesting how, as she was moving closer to him, the camera moved away so we can only see their silhouettes in the end, and just the very beginning of a hug-
But then we get to follow ZYZ as he's almost floating through the rooms of the Bureau. I imagine these are ZYC's private quarters... It might be the fighter training, or ZYC is just so attuned to ZYZ's presence, either way the fact that he noticed the Great Demon immediately despite being deep in thought, *and* wasn't surprised in the slightest, is kinda amusing to me. (Don't get me started on the bed in the foreground as the scene switches to them talking 😂)
I'm afraid I was not wrong when I thought that "I understand ZYZ now" might mean, among other things, that ZYC understands the demon's wish for death, and thus feels less conflicted about fulfilling it. At the same time, the relief in his face when he talks of breaking the oath, regardless of the consequences... These two, I swear. Because of course ZYZ cuts in immediately with, absolutely not, no dying on my watch, ZYC!
(Also, did we forget the little detail of ZYC not possessing an inner core? Or have they already discussed it behind the scenes and this way we got the "do what you want to become who you want to be" because of course they're going to repair the sword so ZYC *will* be protected from his own demonic energy?)
Now don't come for me, I don't have medical training or anything, but I know depression, and I know how I can extend the gentlest of care and understanding to others while completely unable to do the same for myself, and this is what I see in ZYZ in this scene. He reassures ZYC, encourages him to think about the future, talks of how they're family and they're in this mess together, and yet, and yet, almost in the same breath, he still insists on only one thing for himself. I understand him *and* I want him to want to have a future too, goddamnit.
Is everyone in this place suffering from insomnia? I mean, not that surprising all things considered, but we barely see anyone from the crew resting... You tell him, WX! Him and ZYC, the two self-sacrificial idiots. Also, for such a short scene, it sure did pack a punch... I love the tenderness between them.
Finally we got around to repairing that goddamn cloud ceiling over the Wilderness lol And of course, now that Bai Jiu's mom is back to her human form, he's - where?
The way I cackled at the way my question was answered in the very next scene... Li Lun, the drama queen of all times, does not want to miss the family excursion! (Also, I've seen it said many times but it bears repeating, the kid actor is phenomenal. I literally forget he's 12 when he's portraying Li Lun.) Ying Lei is the goodest boy, and I'd give him all the head pats and high fives. Don't die, please.
I find myself cheering for WX repeatedly in this ep, probably because she keeps saying what I'm thinking, ZYC, ZYZ, stop being idiots!
Well this took an unexpected turn. I love how unruffled ZYZ appears up until the very moment ZYC says, let's give up on restoring the sword, and I hate how his reply seems to be the drama once again reminding us that apparently there are only two possible outcomes. Come on, give us a secret third thing, I'm begging you!
"Even if it's restored... please don't die." What I just said! I remember how we were all, ZYC is going to regret his oath, and we definitely got that, but for him to outright put a condition like that on restoring of his fate weapon, demanding ZYZ to promise not to die is just - top tier. My heart. And then I cheered for WX again, she was *so* mad lol Good on you, girl, you said what we were all thinking!
Ugh ZYZ, stop breaking my heart. I don't think he's ever outright lied to any of them, but the way he seems to categorize his own promises to ZYC... I guess the one about not seeking death is not the highest priority. Ffs
All demons in this world, including ancestors, seem to suffer from loneliness above all else... I love how fast ZYC refuses. He's ready to sacrifice himself, but he'll never sacrifice any of his companions. Ngl I don't think I breathed through the whole sequence that followed. The goodbyes (PSJ, can you act like a normal person at least once? Not sure if it's the actress, but oh goodness does PSJ grate on me sometimes), the "I choose myself," and then ZYZ activating his energy to break the ice, because of course he would. To be honest, at this point in the story, I would really rather these two died together doing something heroic, as opposed to one of them dying and the other continuing on in misery, but hey, unfortunately I'm not the one calling the shots here.
(Also, seeing Bingyi and Ying Long in the preview... hats off to the costuming and makeup folks, because damn, TJR and HMH are already exceptionally good looking, but in the demon get-up they're just out of this world, achingly beautiful.)
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I was feeling dramatic
#yuki judai#jaden yuki#yugioh gx#yuki juudai#ANYWAYS#judai is my blorbo#like one of my top blorbos#if u asked me 3 years ago who would be in my top blorbos list#or if u told me it would be the protagonist of yugioh gx#i would not have believed u#what can i say i love a guy who gets depression#anyways i dunno if i'll ever do more with this so#my art
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8i've been thinking about the last asks i got today. and i think it's better for me to take a step back from this account. i know the anon didn't mean anything by it, but i still feel like i am being a negative presence on here and weirding people out with who i am is nothing i want. so, i am not deleting or anything. i am just gonna be less present with sharing personal things or leaving tags. I'll probably be more active on my second account where i don't have that many followers :)
#i guess it affected me more than i'd like to#i don't want to make people uncomfortable#and i am sorry if i did that with any of my posts i know they have been overly emotional and maybe a bit insane#it's true that i am trying to deal with losing and finding peace i am not very good at this due to my intense emotions#and my fear of loneliness and losing people. i am also in a very bad depressive episode. i am aware that this isn't an excuse for any#of my behavior. i never had a support system so dealing with all this on my own and getting no therapist who is willing to see you#it's a downer. guilt is eating me alive and my mental condition is the something that has ruined a lot for me but it has never before done#such a terrible job before. recovering from that and dealing with the aftermath of this is exhausting and has taken a toll on my physical#and mental health i know this post doesn't mean anything to most of all and is at best confusing but i guess it's my poor attempt#of avoiding that people will hate me. i don't want to self-pity more than i already did. but i do that all on my own already.#i know that life is so much more difficult than fiction and you can't expect miracles or believe in faith to fix anything#i know there is no cure to who i am. i can only try to navigate it better in the future. it doesn't mean that i can't regret what i did.#that i can't feel guilty about it. i know that won't change anything but i am also trying to get better and i understand if that's not#visible. i just have to believe that one day it will be enough for people to say 'hey. i know you are fucked up.#and you hurt me and you've been a bitch. but we'll work on it. i believe in you.' otherwise i have to believe that this loneliness#is all there is and that i'm gonna die hollow#i don't want much. i just want some patience and peace#i want to believe that i am worthy of love and that i can get a future. and yes. me talking about wanting a wife and this stupid apple pie#life... maybe it's cliche and stupid but i have been alone for years and i am so tired of fighting. is it so bad that i don't want to do#this alone? and that goes for friends as well. i want to cook for people built things and tend to a garden to take care of animals#and to create instead of destroying for once.#i don't know why i am still writing i guess when the dam breaks... again. i am sorry for ever making people uncomfortable or even hurting#them that was never my intention. i promise#so i really hope. whoever is reading this. i hope you are doing alright. i hope you had/have a good day. tell the people you care about#you love them and enjoy the little things. read that book. eat that chocolate or do whatever brings you joy. the world is so difficult to#navigate but you are doing such a great job by just existing. you are making this world a better place with the light you radiate#the last thing I want to do something I never can forgive myself for is hurting people#not only but especially the ones I care about. but beyond that those I barely know too because I care about you guys too#I just don't want that... I want to leave the world better than I found it but I'm having a hard time doing it due to this stupid fucking#brain of mine.
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dokja doing his best time and time again to help junghyeok with regressor depression…. I see the sauce being cooked here
#it’s gay sauce#for gay people.#going post#Orv#tbh dokja I think you should just tell junghyeok everything at this point. not for gay reasons but to make things easier#these two work rlly well together when junghyeok isn’t trying to kill dokja imagine how they’d be if they were fully on the same page too#every day there’s a new fuckin dokkaebi. where do they keep getting these guys#and why do they keep getting cuntier#A THANOS SNAP???#choosing between a thanos snap and killing the strongest incarnation. alright everyone time to speed up on the killing nirvana thing I gues#Junghyeok relying on the predictability of knowing everything…. You can take the man out of the timeloop but you can’t take the timeloop ou#of the man#(I know he’s not out of his regressions but sh)#‘I can’t think of a way to correct this’ junghyeok aren’t you supposed to be smart? Stop being stupid#dokja gets me. that’s why he’s also a reader#Ohhh okay we’re having a Big Talk now. good job dokja#‘But the real problem is when you’ve finally managed to save the world’ THATS WHAT IM SAYING!!!!! DOKJA GETS ME#YOU CAN TAKE THE MAN OUT OF THE TIMELOOP BUT YOU CANT TAKE THE TIMELOOP OUT OF THE MAN!#unless junghyeok kicks his regressor’s depression in the ass and learns not to rely on knowing future scenarios so much.#and they’re on a rooftop…. The symsbsnolismm….#Oh wait dokja’s making a different point#ah. ptsd.#well that’s part of my argument I guess#Ohhhhh I love dokja getting to be a prophet rn. and junghyeok realizing he’s onto some shit#‘This world you’re about to abandon could be the only world where you can live to see it end as a human being’ OOOOF. OOF.#that’s heavy#Anyway time for comic relief. sorry Uriel but no gay sex yet#‘Who’s the strongest incarnation?’ Junghyeok: no doubt it’s me#……………………………….#DOKJA IS ALSO CONSIDERING HIMSELF THE STRONGEST?? GUYS
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Girl like. The reason he said "this is how it should be" and faced death with a smile....is cuz he wanted to die. For 2 years he sat there thinking he was worthless and deserved to die. If he hadn’t be shot, his death would’ve been suicide, he was fully planning to die in a gutter somewhere undetected. When saying "this is how it should be" hes literally saying "don’t cry because I’m dying, my death is a good thing actually because I fucking suck and you are better off without me". I don’t think that’s badass even slightly, it’s actually really sad and really shitty. Shinjiro is so convinced that he deserves to die and hates the idea of anyone giving a shit about him because he literally can’t wrap his mind around the idea that he will be missed when he’s gone, that his death is a bad thing actually. And his last words were meant to be comforting because he fully did not intend for anyone to be there when he died, he intended to die alone, so he says them as a reminder that he’s not worth crying over
Personally, if it were me, if I was holding my dying best friend in my arms who was deeply depressed and suicidal and he said "this is how it should be" uh. I wouldn’t admire him for it??? Like am I losing my mind when I say the way this game handles Shinji is bad or is anyone else seeing this too 😰
#its like okay listen i understand the basic math of any persona game they say things and everything they say is actually#very bad when you think about it for more than 3 seconds#like what theyre intending to do with the death of this character is be like oh no your sad friend dies tragically thats so saddddd#but that doesnt mean you cant live a wonderful life full of meaning you cant let grief consume you life is beautiful awagga#and i guess shinji is a specific character whos used cuz i guess its more tragic that he never realized he was worthy of life and shit#and i guess its also like ‘dont be like this guy who let grief consume him and then died you gotta Be Different’#which i dont. love. that last part cuz if you think about shinji and what led him down this road#its like. of course hes depressed! he accidentally killed a woman with a child when he was 16!#he himself is an orphan and he just made some other kid an orphan as well and it happened cuz his persona went out of control#which very much can translate to ‘this must mean im dangerous and can hurt everyone if im not kept under control’#so of course he isolated himself and believed he was evil and became suicidal like who wouldnt feel that way#like am i supposed to be mad he left sees and took drugs cuz uh while i dont think isolation or Evil Drug is good for his mental health#i dont think him continuing to fight in sees is something he can just easily do again given how he killed someone like he shouldnt have to#be a part of this thing anymore like how would he even safely get castor to not do that??? he cant kill more people on accident!#so yeah like using shinji as an example of bad coping mechanisms is already just. a big fucking oof to me like it just feels like the game#is saying he shouldve gotten over it and simply not be suicidal and stayed on the team. idk if thats the intent but uh it wouldnt faze me#cuz persona games are notoriously awful at writing characters who are traumatized and abused#but what makes everything even worse is how the game kinda like. acts like shinjis death is a stepping stone#like we’re supposed to use it as a wake up call and understand the stakes but keep going on anyways#and akihiko and Ken get. ‘great character development’ according to the game telling you they have now developed#but damn all akihiko is is just repressed he cries for 3 seconds and then is like I SHOULD MAN UP and then neglects a depressed child#shinjis dying words are words to live by now even though they piss me the fuck off like girl am i crazy HES FUCKING#HES TELLING ME NOT TO CRY OVER HIM BECAUSE HE SHOULD BE DEAD ACTUALLY AND THIS IS A GOOD THING ACTUALLY#like if the game wants us to still find meaning in life despite losing someone it just really hurts that shinji has to die for that to work#apparently. cuz the character i see myself in is shinji. not some perfect prettyboy who does everything perfectly and has 4 gfs#his death seems like a punishment for bad behavior. the bad behavior being of course depression and drug use. and im simply supposed to be#better than that if i want to live. and we dont get to form a connection with him cuz thats gayyyyy#and his death is like a NOBLE HEROIC SACRIFICE idk its just such bullshit to me i hate it so bad#how is killing a suicidal guy and then treating it as admirable that he said ‘this is how it should be’ supposed to make me feel#makes me feel sick personally and it ruins the entire game’s theme to me because its fucking shallow and the story is bad and im tired
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my flatmate asking me the day before "do u want to hang out w me and [old friend] everyone else cancelled so I can invite u now" is not the heartfelt offer she thinks it is :^/
#what am i sloppy seconds. fuck off man#i like them both but im not in the place to socialise rn + also it just feels kinda mean. theyve had these plans for weeks#and i wasnt invited bc some of their other friends (who ive never met) didnt want me there which is fair enough ig#even tho their friends complained abt someone else bringing her bf but they both blocked the veto for that. pretty sure ik them-#better than some guy but whatever. i dont rly like their friends anyway bc they only ever have bad things to say abt them#like damn they sound like they have the emotional range of toddlers plus theyre all into shit like genshin. so i wasnt fazed abt it#hope they have a nice time etc but wow sure now theyve cancelled the day before u can invite me as a replacement. yeah thatll do wonders#for the social and self esteem issues i have around being single use and disposable and always on the outside etc yippee#the thing is if i go theyll just talk to each other anyway and leave me to be the fly on the wall like they always do. they dont want#me there they just want an audience i literally have nothing else to contribute i dont think they even like me that much so!#anyway complaint over. genuinely i hope they have a nice time im just annoyed at being treated like that + probably projecting a bit too#its not like i could go if i wanted to anyway bc i have shit to sort out + mail to wait for. maybe next time invite me from the start huh#we had another old friend visit last weekend but those plans were really made without me too and i was just added bc i Live Here so its#kind of unavoidable. but oh well whatever it was nice to see them either way#im too depressed rn to fix my social life or even rely on existing coping strategies in social situations so im having to temporarily#cut it back bc i get too trigger sensitive + dont want to hurt myself or others bc of an arbitrary emotional overreaction#its usually one of the first things to go when im Going Thru It not in a self isolating way but more bc its one of the hardest things#for me to maintain + im pretty self sufficient so its not absolutely crucial. like of course i love my friends but socialising is a#want not a need yknow. eating/sleeping/exercising/hygiene are all more fundamental parts of the engine so i gotta prioritise them#and it sucks but ill survive. anyway sorry for venting on everyones dash so early in the morning i woke up grumpy 👎#i need to get breakfast and then go out. ughhhhhhh okay.#.vent
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feeling of growing into my body is so nice too. god puberty sucked
#i mean i had other stuff too. and so do probably most of my followers bc Trans Things. i never had dysphoria from being trans tho#it was all from discomfort during puberty + depersonalization#so now that both of those have lessened + ive gotten better at managing them. HOLY SHIT ITS NICE#i dont feel ashamed of my body!!! ive achieved complete body neutrality its so fucking awesome#i dont even feel like i need to dress up anymore. nor am i uncomfortable with the idea that someone could find me attractive#bc i understand its not my job to be or not be attractive its just my job to EXIST. other ppl can think whatever they want about me#its SO NICE. i am growing into my life its so lovely.#just a bit of positivity for you guys :] this site (and online spaces in general) can be so negative bc it’s a safe place to ent#so heres a break from that. from someone who struggled heavily w mental illness for multiple years#i don’t want to disclose what or why but it wasnt just quirky depression anxiety etc it was like from real scary shit + near death experienc#<- not to say anxiety & depression don’t suck. what i mean is that it wasn’t quirky ‘omg i have anxiety im so scared of everyone 🥺👉👈’#type shit that every white girl highschooler insists they have. it wasnt just beingn sad cus of high school LMAO#NOT TO DOWNPLAY THAT BUT LIKE. U KNOW THE PPL I MEAN. u dont have anxiety/ocd/depression dude youre just Sad. fairly so but itsnot Disorder#but. from someone who went thru all that. IT GETS BETTER. also if ur like 13-15 ur brain hormones suck and it gets better 100%#like everything feels So Bad but its just uour brain chemicals and i am so sorry uour brain does that. BUT IT GETS BETTER I PROMISE. <3#it doesnt make your struggles easier but you should know that it DOES get better. <3 love u#ok <3 take care guys#tobin talks
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growing up is about realising every ship in skam brighton is, in a way, a failmarriage and that’s Okay
#having a Hashtag Moment.#the thing is. they're all desperately clinging to one another so they feel less alone and less evil and less unlovable#but all of them are so HAUNTED and SAD and don't have the proper words to EXPRESS it so they pretend to fall in love#and some of that love is real yes. this is not saying that there is no love there#i believe a lot of my silly little guys are in love with each other. but i also don't think any of them know how to love properly#they're Trying. they've seen the movies and they're Trying to be in love. but they don't know HOW so they just copy what they know#and it always falls apart it will inevitably fall apart but we don't See It because they don't See It#my headcanon? none of the ''end game'' skambr ships are together anymore and hardly any of them talk to each other#sure they text and occasionally call. but the only ones who Actually see each other would be bree and al#and james/theo/nick and even That's rare#i reckon sandy and jake would get lunch first summer after uni and then never again#rori and liz Try to stay in contact but it just gets Too Much#they all just sadly follow each other on instagram and send depressing happy birthday messages#ANYWAYS CAN YOU TELL I'M HAVING A NORMAL ONE#what watching a series of the Best rvd amvs does to a person#also this post comes from the rereading s1 gang SANDY AND ESTHER ARE SO FUCKING SAD TOGETHER. THEY ARE KANGS TO ME.
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I could say more if I did a proper character analysis here but, for now, I’m just musing on how John Gaius absolutely captures a very specific kind of It’s Never My Fault guy.
And John is SMART and he’s good at talking and so he weaves it in so smoothly and like. His uninterrupted monologues in NtN absolutely make you want to be frustrated for him! That dude got put through the wringer!
And these parts are so Good to me because like, if you pay just a little bit of extra attention the patterns emerge. Everyone external to him and his group is an idiot, and can only be cast as such. And they’re stupid and scared and they Wrongly demonize John when he was only trying to help and wait John what was that part in the middle. Repeat that part in the middle. You did WHAT to the cops exactly.
HE never wants to be the Guy Who Says It. He wants to be liked too much. So he relies on people like P— and G— and A— and M— to say it for him. Negotiating for a nuclear warhead but HE John didn’t really wanna be a jerk about it you know? That was everyone else. The cows the cops the people who die on his compound are all brushed over or mocked. His sleepless mad actions, his raising of the dead, his setting off the nuke these are all just, actions. Unfortunate. Necessary. Of a guy who’s been having a REALLY hard time and has been victimized by EVERYONE and he really just wants to save the world, guys, if you’ll just LISTEN.
He’s gotta be the Funny Guy. Everything’s gotta be a Joke because, oh, was that bad? No, I was just joking, you’re taking it too seriously man chill out. He needs to be Liked he needs everyone to Like him and the biggest injustices he faces, in light of nuclear warfare and the eradication of humanity, is that people are being so mean to him.
And the closest he gets to letting flashes of his wrongdoing through are when it challenges his ego to deny it otherwise. Because he’s Smart and he’s Competent and you need to know and recognize and worship this. He didn’t kill all those cops by accident. “Come on, love. Guys as careful as me don’t have accidents.”
He’s just! He’s so! He’s entirely This Guy and he’s GOD. He’s bisexual he’s depressed he’s an obsessive Funnyman he’s blinded by his own ego he’s immortal he’s never to blame he’s more tormented than Jesus if you ask him and don’t ask the people he’s victimized in ways so much worse and he’s. LITERALLY. MADE HIMSELF GOD. I’m obsessed with him.
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(long story and no short sorry) GUYSSS I DID ITT
I INDUCED IT!!!!! I WAS PURE AS A FUCKING BABY
IDK WHAT TO SAY (ok enough w capslock)
i have so much to say and not a thing at da same time idk how
anyway i want to begin with thanking you @b4ddprincess bc youre the reason i realized why i started this thing. thank you for making my life better and make me realized what i need to do: nothing. (its same for you guys, all u have to do is nothing)
two fuckn years ago i said to myself that i need a better life, quiter life, less fight with everthing bc everything was so loud and not clear i was feeling lost like a child in the market, and i wanted to make things better for myself in every way, but the main idea of my reasons to wanting to get in the void was: making anxiety go and having better people in my life. but the ''voidlist'' just never stopped bc im kinda greedy(having the idea of controling on your life, the idea of that power makes you greedy. yes thats a thing) anyway the more i add to the list the more i feel like im movin away from my desires then i feel depressed bc ive overcomplicating it bc theres so many things to do but i dont do anything so nothing happend bc i was waiting to be someth happen. and then i started doing awkwardly silly things such as: void routines and challenges and (im embarrassed of this one bc i was too desperate) drinking water
youve read it correct drinking water.
i was sooo desperate for having those things id do anything to get them.
i am simple. i want what everyone wants🎀🎀🎀: shifting realities bc i have so many crush and i need them to be crush me in bed(for 2020 girlies)
being an academic weapon is so easy for me🎀(bc of the urge to make my family proud) +dream collage
being the girl that everyone gets along w(basic needs)
being the girl who is pretty not cute(trauma response)
glowing aura(cats loves people w glowing aura yes thats a thing too)
dream body n hair(bc i deserve this🎀)
healthy (girlyfriend)friends(basic needs)
and of course him, my sp(i cant tell wich one at that time but i releived that its not him now, bc MY BELOVED CURRENT BF. guyss he is the one. dont u dare ask me how you know? i literally manifested him🎀)
then i realized i can have everything bc its my reality so why not add these:
new phone, +macbook air
dream apartment of my own
pinterest closet
lifa app for this reality
financially free-money(a lot. like really a lot)
knowing 4 languages like a native person(bc i want to be diplomat so bad) +sign language(its in general)
a little drama(its not gonna hurt anybody)
my parents being more lovable and away from me
every time i try to get in, either i was failing or falling
and im sick of it, sick of it so much i quit.(for a year)
then i go to the theraphy(ofc no im jk ilove being crazy)
one day i saw a post ss from tumblr about pure consciousness on pinterest and i was like whaat is thiiss. no mention of void so i thougt its a diffrent thing and i download the tumblr again and search everything abt it. and same excitement again after one year same thougts and same list popes up in my head. and i was like ok maybe this time itll happen.
still waiting to be someth happen so nothing happend, it was such a waste of time trying to get in while i was already be, i was already what i want to become. i was that girl that everyone gets along with but i couldnt even see bc i was too focused on wanting to be. but still tried every night and failed. and again tried-failed-quit circle bc.. have you ever met me🎀
4 month ago i saw the girl, iconic blogger and the goddess of my dreams, her @b4ddprincess thx again love u so much
a post pops in my fyp and i see the words ''pure consciousness'' i was like noo not again. and i was serious abt it i wasnt gonna read the whole thing but it attract me n i couldnt resist it so ive read it from the top to the bottom. and she got my interest so i stalked her page from the last and to the first post. it was quiet a beautiful journey for me. lasted like 3 days, the end of the 3rd day i was ''woaw it was this easy all along? u cant be serious.'' she was. i tried one last time, no breathing exercise, no ridiculous routines and no waiting something to be happen. it was just me being real me chilling out asf.
and it was this easy and it should be this easy bc being your 4d self is being nothing also being everything at the same time. if u wanna be everything you should be nothing first(as wizardliz saying: drop the old story, leave the victimhood, for being better stop being bitter etc.)u should make a space for everything first and then u can be everything.
for being 4d self of yours stop being your3dself.
sooo long story (no)short i am writing this from my mac in my new apartment(in middle of the night bc i couldnt sleep and then one tumblr notification reminded me i have a success story to share too) and my phone buzzing two minutes a time bc of my friends while im writing this, so if theres anything wrong ignore it pls.
oh u asking my bf how cute, hes sleepin in my bed now, exhausted from the work n school balance.
YWS SCHOOL!! im in my dream collage and im going to be in paris for a week. i deserve a vacation i guess(its for another conference), i kinda hate french men bc theyre so mansplaning(not like how i imagined, its hard to be friends w them)girls are cute but i feel like theyre aware im not permanent there so we just con buddies still cute and hepful for this foreigner.
and i canceled the lifa app thingy bc i can be my purest consciousness anytime i want, so i am my lifa app.
and thx to 4 languages i make a lot of money and that brings us to the pinterest closet, yesterday i realiased that. theyre not comes to me w an imaginary way like i imagined! i go outside for shopping casually and theyre there luckily i have enough money to buy them.
and my family theyre living in our hometown now so as i want it to be, we are away from eachother.
and the most magical thing: SHIFTING REALITIESSS
i did 5 world before i met w my bf. it was such a wonderful experience. if you have doubts abt shifting you can go fuck urself
because sir i did it and i am very sure that dean winchester being my husband is not a daydream, fantasy nor lucid dreaming. believe it or not he kissed me GOD HE KİSSED ME(someone should stop me i have a bf)
is there anything i missed let me see.. cats i have 2 cats now and theyre adorable. glowing aura-check
the girl who is pretty not cute- check +make anxietygo-checkcheckcheck
dream body and hair- check and check
i wanna give u a info i didnt have all my desires by being my4dself
not directly actually. but i have them all. and thats the point.
im not trying to be a blogger but if you have any question abt anything, id be happy to help
now i need to upgrade things in my farm byeess
loves, siena.
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PAC How Will Your Future Spouse View You
Pile 1 Pile 2 Pile 3
DISCLAIMER THIS IS A GENERAL READING TAKE WHAT RESONATES AND LEAVE WHAT DOESN'T.
Strictly for entertainment purposes.
PILE 1
So, before I get into the tarot bit of the reading the overall vibe I am getting is that you and your future spouse will be that couple that are still doing cute stuff together even in old age. You know those older couples you see on TikTok on dates still happy and very much in love, yeah like that. One word I can use to describe it is cozy, just very warm and affectionate basically feeling like this person is your home. It's going to be like 'I'd rather come home to you then be anywhere else'.
On to the tarot bit, Your FS sees you as someone very confident and optimistic (even if you don't see yourself that way). They see you as being positive and very wholesome. Again, before I pulled cards I channelled and I still got the warmth.
Oh my gosh, if any of you have read The Song of Achilles that's basically it. Before anyone points out to me they were a same sex couple .Yes, I know but I am talking about the relationship dynamic between Patroclus and Achilles.
You may have gone through a difficult time in your life and your future spouse will admire how strong and resilient you are, how you're able to adapt to challenges and changes in environment. You may be the type of person who is connected to both their divine feminine and masculine and they truly find that attractive.
They certainly view you as their other half and I know its cliche to say soulmate but that's all your future spouse is saying. You just give them so much happiness and emotional fulfilment.
'They are my home, my soulmate, my forever'
PILE 2
Ugh Pile 2 your spouse will literally worship you😩. Like you'll tell them your insecurities and they'll just sit there kissing every scar, mark, dimple anything you're insecure about they'll adore. If you're a female or a feminine reading this and you have thick thighs I heard them say 'Come here and crush my skull with those sexy thighs'. Whoever you are you have someone's poor child down horrendous for you.
I think they may be the type to just watch your social media whether you are getting to know each other, dating, engaged or married your social media pages, pictures and videos will always be on their phone screen and they won't go to sleep without listening to a little voice message you sent. Once they get attached baby there's absolutely no getting rid of them, I heard 'You'll have an easier time getting rid of bed bugs'.
When you meet them, they may be a party animal or a player.
Disclaimer it's not toxic obsession more like they will let you be your own person but at the end of the day they are yours and you are theirs, you are their spouse, and they are your spouse and they will forever put you on a pedestal not to the open where they will neglect themselves.
They see you as a prize (again not in a creepy way) You may have options when you meet this person but best believe they'll make sure to stand out and win you over. They see you as the best the world has to offer in terms of what a wife/husband/spouse should be. Your person may have had a few letdowns when it came to love and just know that they see you as a dream come true and again, I know that's very cliche but trust me when Isay they view having you as a spouse as their biggest accomplishment and they want you to know that they'll prove to you every day they are worthy to call themselves your spouse. They feel like you have gone through a period of depression and sadness, and they want you to know that they acknowledge it and they see you as strong every day.
The couple I channelled for you guys is Queen Charlotte and King George from Bridgerton.
PILE 3
First thing I heard 'Sugar Daddy'. This person will spoil you but love you even more. Yes, they may have money and give you gifts but this person truly does love you, care about you and respect you.
They may be older than you that's why people may think that they are your glucose guardian which is not technically wrong and not technically correct either. I feel like that will be a long term joke you two have about them being your sucrose supplier..
They will definitely view you as delicate, I want to say that they are the protective type but not protective to the point of you feeling suffocated by them. They want you to be comfortable and have what you like 'If my spouse wants that watch I'll get it for them'.
They will view you as fun loving, yet you have this air of power to you that they love. Sure, they view you as delicate and they want to protect you, but they also view you as strong and beyond capable of taking care of yourself and those around you basically your spouse is saying 'they want me, but they don't need me'. They know that you can walk away from them anytime and they like that you're always in your power no matter what.
Your spouse admires how you don't need them to feel whole or for financial gain they see you as a breath of fresh air, a change of pace, an adventure.
He may touch you a lot with your consent obviously, like a hand on your waist, shoulder or they may steal little quick kisses. Also, there may be a lot of friendly banter in the relationship.
The couple I channel for you guys is Fallon and Liam from Dynasty.
#free tarot reading#pick a pile#pick a card#future spouse#tarot reading#tarotcommunity#tarotblr#tarot cards#daily tarot#love tarot reading#love tarot free#pagan#paganblr#hellenic pagan#Spotify
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240611 RENJUN
"It's been a while, Czennies. I have a lot I want to say, but I can only say it here, so I'm sorry. Please understand how frustrated I am. Because of my panic disorder and depression, it's been really tough. I didn't want to cause any trouble for the other members, so I pushed myself until my body couldn't handle it anymore and I collapsed. It was too dangerous, so I made the big decision to take a break from activities. I wanted to keep going more than anyone, but both my mind and body were reacting badly, so I had to stop. I'm sorry that I couldn't be stronger.
The main thing I want to say today is that I'm not blaming Czennies at all. I was mentally struggling, so during my break, I tried to recover quickly by going to amusement parks and doing things I hadn't been able to do, healing myself. I'm gradually getting better, but I saw some comments saying, "If he's that sick, how can he go out and have fun?" I found this absurd and pathetic. Does being sick mean I have to be depressed, take medication every day, and stay in a hospital room crying all the time? I'm doing my best to recover quickly so I can be active with DREAM again. To do that, I need to take walks and do what I want to help with my treatment.
However, even during my personal time, I have stalkers following me, sitting next to me on planes, taking photos while I'm sleeping. It's a huge burden for me. How do they find out my flight details and sit right next to me? They brazenly claim, "No, we didn't follow you." This is causing me so much stress. There are many ways to show love and support without resorting to such extreme methods.
Today, I received multiple calls, thinking it was the delivery guy, only to hear, "Is this my friend ***?" The profile picture was of our members. Is this really a coincidence? Whether you are young or old, I will not tolerate anyone invading my privacy. I will take legal action through a lawyer and go as far as filing lawsuits. Please, come to your senses and use your time and passion in the right way. If you listen to DREAM's music occasionally, we can create good memories together as DREAM and Czennies.
My message above is not directed at Czennies at all, but a warning to those who are illegally causing harm to us. Czennies, I love you so much and want you to be happy. You know that, right?"
Translated by jenodinu
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School Bus Graveyard incorrect quotes because I'm bored
o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o
Taylor: Look how creepy it is looking down this hallway.
Ashlyn: I'm gonna get vertigo.
Aiden: I'm a Virgo!
Tyler, deadpan: No, you're a virgin.
...
Aiden: You lying, cheating, piece of shit!
Tyler: Oh yeah? You’re the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD
Aiden: I’m leaving you, and I’M TAKING ASHLYN WITH ME
Logan, picking up the monopoly board: I think we’re gonna stop playing now.
...
Taylor: Why is Tyler so upset?
Logan: He took one of those “Which Character Are You?” quizzes
Taylor: And...?
Logan: He got Aiden.
...
Ashlyn: What did you do with the phantom's body?
Aiden: What didn’t I do with the body?
Everyone:
Aiden: Okay, that sounded more sexual than I intended. I disposed of the phantom respectfully.
...
Aiden: Here’s a fun Christmas idea. We hang mistletoe, but instead of kissing, you have to FIGHT whoever else is under it.
Logan: Aiden, no.
Ben, with text to speech: Mistlefoe.
Logan: Please stop encouraging him.
...
Taylor: Who thinks I can fit 15 marshmallows in my mouth?
Tyler: You’re a hazard to society
Aiden: And a coward. DO TWENTY.
...
Emma, trying to be nice to Ashlyn's new friends: Would you like to stay for dinner?
Mike, excited for his daughter: WOULD YOU LIKE TO STAY FOREVER?
...
Logan: What's a word thats a mix between 'sad' and 'mad'?
Ben: Disgruntled, miserable, desolated-
Aiden: Smad.
...
Ashlyn: Why are you on the floor?
Aiden: I'm depressed.
Aiden: Also I was stabbed, can you get Ben, please.
...
Taylor: Aiden and I were crossing the street, and this dude drove by and honked at us
Ashlyn, sighing: What did he do?
Taylor: he chased him to the next red light, then reached into his window and...
Aiden: Who wants a steering wheel?
...
Aiden: If I accidentally sat on a voodoo doll of myself, would I be trapped forever in that position, doomed to starve to death?
Logan: How am I supposed to know?
Tyler: You say that as if we don’t use you as a source of knowledge of the occult.
Logan: ...You wouldn't be trapped.
...
Ashlyn: Tyler, keep an eye on Aiden today. He's going to say something to the wrong person and get punched.
Tyler: Sure, I’d love to see him get punched.
Ashlyn: Try again.
Tyler, sighing: I will stop Aiden from getting punched.
...
Aiden, holding a python: Guys I impulsively bought a snake, what do I name him
Tyler: You did WHAT–
Ben: William Snakespeare
...
Ashlyn: Dandelions symbolize everything I want to be in life
Taylor: Fluffy and dead with a gust of wind?
Ashlyn: Unapologetic. Hard to kill. Feral, filled with sunlight, bright, beautiful in a way that the conventional and controlling hate but cannot ever fully destroy. Stubborn. Happy. Bastardous. Friends with bees. Highly disapproving of lawns. Full of wishes that will be carried far after I die.
Aiden: edible
...
Taylor, whispering to Aiden, who’s on the phone with Ashlyn: Ask her something!
Aiden: How are you feeling?
Ashlyn: Fine.
Taylor: Something personal!
Aiden: At what age did you start hearing voices?
...
Aiden: If I die, my funeral is going to be the biggest party ever and you’re all invited
Logan: If?
Tyler: Great, the only party I’d actually go to and he might not even die.
...
Logan: We need a distraction.
Ashlyn: Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises?
Aiden, whispering: My time has come
...
Tyler: Where are you going?
Taylor: To get ice cream or commit a felony, I’ll decide on the way there
Tyler: I'll come with
...
Mike, buying a whole bag of knives, guns and other weapons like he's going to war on a random Tuesday: I can explain
Jacob (shop owner): Can you?
Mike: If you give me thirty seconds to think of a lie.
...
Taylor: Heads up, if you try to make a candle with food colouring, it will just sink to the bottom of the glass, and when the flame eventually reaches the bottom all the food colouring will catch fire and become one giant tall flame that you cannot possibly blow out and the glass will start to crack and then you'll throw your tea on it in a panic and then the extremely hot food colouring will boil and sizzle horribly and then the glass will shatter.
Tyler, sighing: What did you do?
Taylor, wailing: A MISTAKE
...
Mr. Thomas: What are your goals?
Ashlyn: To pet all the dogs.
Mr. Thomas: No, I meant your goals for this trip.
Ashlyn: To pet all the dogs in Savannah.
...
Logan: Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming?
Ashlyn: Does anyone in this godforsaken group ever think before they speak?
...
Taylor: Aiden isn’t answering their phone
Ashlyn: I’ll call
Taylor: Ben and I have both tried six times each, what makes you thi-
Aiden: Hello?
...
Aiden: I was arrested for being too cool.
Tyler: The charges were dropped due to a lack of supporting evidence.
...
Aiden: Jail is no fun. I’ll tell you that much
Taylor: You’ve been to jail?
Aiden: Once. In Monopoly.
...
Mike: You love me, right?
Emma: Normally, I’d say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere and I don’t like it.
...
Aiden: Let’s watch Sharkboy and Lavagirl.
Ashlyn: Okay
Aiden: And make out during the scary parts.
Ashlyn: The-
Ashlyn: The scary parts?
Ashlyn: Of Sharkboy and Lavagirl.
...
Ashlyn: How petty can you get?
Tyler: I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about.
Taylor: I KNEW IT-
...
Aiden: I've already sent good vibes your way… they’re coming. There’s nothing you can do to stop them.
Logan: This is the most threatening way I’ve ever been cheered up.
...
Mike: So what’s for dinner?
Emma, staring at the food she just burnt: Regret.
o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o
That's all for today!
#school bus graveyard#school bus graveyard webtoon#sbg#sbg (webtoon)#ashlyn banner#aiden clark#ben clark#taylor hernandez#tyler hernandez#logan fields#mike banner#emma banner#i love those two so much#incorrect quotes#sbg incorrect quotes#incorrect sbg quotes#aidlyn#ashden
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smoke and mirrors - chris sturniolo
chapter one
summary: your best friend Matt backs out of plans you had made together, so you replace him with his brother. the only problem is the two of you can’t stand each other.
{enemies to lovers, fake dating}
includes : explicit language, fluff, smut(penetration, oral, fingering, etc.), angst if you squint, lots of bickering, slow burn
wc: 2.4k
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a/n: first series! it won’t be super long, but I hope you enjoy. send requests for more fics!
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“Matt, you can’t back out now!” You huff, crossing your arms over your chest as you stare at your best friend where he lays on his bed, setting his phone down to look up at you.
“I’m sorry, love, something came up and I can’t make it,” he apologizes, shrugging his shoulders. “I can’t get out of it.”
You groan, throwing your head back in frustration. You had a family wedding to attend and already RSVP’d with a plus one, which was supposed to be your best friend Matt, who had lovingly agreed to pretend to be your boyfriend for the night. Your family was super invasive about you getting a boyfriend, and you wanted to avoid all of the comments and questions by just pretending to have a boyfriend for one night at the wedding, but your plan was falling apart.
“What am I supposed to do? I already told everyone I was coming with somebody, they’re gonna know I was lying if I show up by myself,” you tell him, trying to rack your brain for any ideas.
“You could bring Nick,” Matt suggests, picking his phone back up and going back to scrolling.
You scoff. “Yeah right, like Nick could pretend to be straight for an entire night. He’d be caught in less than an hour.” You shake your head, moving to sit on the edge of the bed next to Matt. “I’m gonna have to go on, like, Bumble or something and find some random to go with me.”
Matt looks up at you over his phone, waiting for you to lock eyes with him before he starts to speak. “I mean… I know one other guy you could ask.”
You tilt your head, excited to hear the suggestion, before you realize who he’s talking about and your eyes widen, head shaking rapidly. “Absolutely not,” you put your hands up, pointer fingers crossed over in an X. “I am not asking Chris, no way.”
Matt raises his eyebrows and purses his lips. “I told you I knew someone, I didn’t say you’d like what I said.”
You roll your eyes. “He would never say yes to me anyway, even if I did want to ask him.”
Matt shrugs. “Maybe. You could always bribe him, he loves a good bribe.”
You think about it for another moment, knowing it would be easier to get Chris to do it than it would to find some random guy to go to a wedding as a first date, but the thought of spending an entire night next to Chris made your skin crawl.
The two of you had never really gotten along, even with you being around as much as you were, you guys never clicked, in fact it was the complete opposite, always insulting each other any chance you got, ignoring each other, and always avoiding being in the same room by yourself, even if only for a few moments.
“I mean… I could try but I really can’t promise I won’t kill your brother, Matt,” you half joke, but not really. “Might turn you into a twin.”
“That’s fucked,” Matt laughs, using his foot to kick you lightly. “I‘ll still be a triplet, even if you kill him. I’ll just be a triplet with severe depression and no will no live.”
“You’re so dramatic,” you tell him through a laugh. “Your life would be so much quieter, wouldn’t that be nice? You’d secretly thank me for killing him.”
Matt shakes his head at you with a smile, though his eyes tell you he thinks you’re crazy, before looking back down at his phone.
“Killing who?” A voice sounds from the doorway and you look up to see the man of the hour staring back at you, a disinterested look on his face.
“You,” you smile sweetly up at Chris.
“That’s nice,” he says, flashing you a fake, tight lipped smile before turning to his brother. “Hey, can you take me to go get food?”
Matt groans and throws his head back, closing his eyes. “But I’m so comfortable,” he whines.
You take a deep breath and consider your options. Chris, who you hate but have known for years, or a random guy who might be a serial killer? You’d definitely be safer with Chris, but the thought of having to be near him without his brothers for an entire night seemed like hell. Especially having to act like you were pleased to be in his presence.
“I’ll take you,” you speak before you can stop yourself.
Both Matt and Chris look at you with shocked expressions, Chris having a bit of disgust in his eyes.
“I’d rather starve, thanks,” Chris replies. “Matt, c’mon seriously, can you take me?” He asks again.
“Chris,” you say in a stern voice, standing up from the bed and walking towards him. “Let me take you. I need to talk to you.”
Chris watches you walk past him through the doorway and then looks back at Matt, shooting him a confused look, to which his brother just shrugs, before he leaves to follow you, finding you by the front door slipping your crocs on.
“The fuck is this about?” He asks, trotting down the stairs to meet you by the front door. “You in love with me or some shit?”
You look up at him with an unamused expression. “You wish I was in love with you.” You huff. “I told you, I gotta talk to you.”
You open the front door and head outside towards your car, opening the drivers side door. You look behind you and see Chris standing in the doorway, staring after you. “I’ll buy your food,” you tell him, and he immediately shuts the door behind him and walks up to your car. “You should’ve led with that!” He says.
You both get in your car and you start driving. “Where do you want to go?” You ask him, turning your head to see him on his phone. “Chris,” you push, reaching out to smack his phone out of his hand, causing it to land on the floor.
“What the fuck, dude. Unnecessary.” Chris huffs, reaching down to grab his phone, but he tucked it between his legs instead of going back on it. “I don’t know, McDonald’s?”
You groan. “You always get McDonald’s. Can’t we get like Popeyes or something?”
Chris looks at you, raising an eyebrow. “Well I didn’t know you were gonna eat, too, jesus. Sure, Popeyes is fine.” He goes for his phone again, but you reach out and grab his hand, stopping him.
“Wait,” you start. “I actually do need to talk to you.”
Chris sighs and puts his phone away in his pocket completely, looking over at you. “Okay, spit it out then.”
You flash a glare at him quickly before returning your eyes to the road. “So… Matt was going to be my plus one for a wedding I’m going to, but he can’t go anymore because something came up, and I can’t ask Nick because he’s gay and that just won’t work, and so that just leaves you.” You tell him nervously.
“So what if he’s gay, your family homophobic or something?” Chris asks, annoyance lacing his voice.
You sigh and pull into the Popeyes parking lot, pulling into a spot and throwing the car into park before you turn your body to face Chris. “No, they’re not homophobic. It’s just… I kind of told them I was bringing a boyfriend.”
Chris stares at you for a moment before laughing, completely unserious. “You? A boyfriend? That’s hilarious. I can’t believe you’re lying to your family about having a boyfriend.”
You don’t laugh though, you just drop your eyes down to your lap, knowing that this was exactly how the conversation would go.
“Wait a minute, that means you want me to pretend I’m your boyfriend? Fuck no, I’d rather be single for the rest of my life. Forget it, dude, you’re shit outta luck with me.” Chris shakes his head, bringing a hand up to run through his hair.
You nod and start backing out of the spot, heading towards the drive-thru. “Yeah I figured that was how you’d respond,” you murmur.
You guys order your food, and you still pay for it, staying true to your word, before heading home. It was a quick but quiet ride back, both of you getting out of the car without a word, not even a ‘thank you’ shot your way. You take your shoes off and head back up to Matt’s room, seeing him in the same position you left him in, only now he was watching a movie, and you got in his bed to join him with your food.
“How’d it go?” He asked, reaching out to steal one of your fries.
“Exactly how I expected it to go. He laughed in my face and said he’d rather be single for the rest of his life than pretend to be my boyfriend,” you tell Matt, looking down at him from where you sat.
Matt smiles up at you, reaching out to pat your leg. “Sorry, kid. You tried.”
You nod and look up at the tv screen, starting to eat your dinner.
-
The next day, you’re sitting on your couch panting your toes and watching your favorite comfort show when you hear the doorbell ring, startling you as you weren’t expecting anybody over today. You look down at your toes and swear under your breath, seeing that you smeared polish along your skin.
You set down the polish on the table and stand up, walking to your door and pulling it open, jaw dropping in shock when you come face to face with Chris, the last person you expected to show up at your door unannounced. You almost wanted to rub your eyes in case you were mistaking him for another triplet, but you knew your eyes didn’t deceive you.
“Chris?” You question. “How did you get here?”
He rolls his eyes at you. “I ubered?” He says like it’s obvious. “You gonna let me in or what?”
You take a step back and let him into your house, shutting the door behind him. “So, to what do I owe the pleasure?” You say, sitting back down on your couch. He follows and sits at the opposite end, looking over at you.
He ignores your question, watching you as you continue to do your toes, cleaning up the mess you made. “Why not just get your toes done?” He asks.
You look at him with an annoyed expression. “Costs money? Why spend money when I can sit around and do it myself?” You go back to painting your toes. “Why are you here?”
Chris shrugs. “Been thinking about what you said yesterday, about the wedding.”
You stop what you’re doing and put the polish back down, turning your attention on Chris completely. “Did you change your mind?” You ask him.
He sighs and licks his lips before speaking. “Consider it my charity for the year,” he smiles, tilting his head at you. “But I need a small favor from you.”
“A favor in return isn’t charity, Chris, it’s like… eye for an eye or whatever.” You look at him deadpan. Of course he’d want something in return, he could never do something for you out of the goodness of his heart.
“Whatever, dude, you want my help or not?” Chris asks. “If not I’ll just leave, doesn’t make a difference to me.”
You huff and give in. “Fine. What’s the favor?” You ask him.
He pulls out his phone, scooting a bit closer to you on the couch. “There’s this girl that will not stop hitting me up and she’s driving me crazy. I told her I’m not interested, I’ve ignored her messages, I even blocked her on snap to see if she’d get the hint but she still texts me every day.” He shows you all of the unanswered messages and your jaw drops.
“Holy shit, what does this girl see in you?” You laugh, reading how desperate she was for Chris.
“Funny,” Chris replies, unamused.
“What does this have to do with me?” You ask him, looking back up at his face.
“I think it’s only fair if I pretend to be your boyfriend at the wedding, you pretend to be my girlfriend on social media. Only for a few weeks or until she stops messaging me. Plus, you’re way hotter than her. ” Chris tells you, and by the tone of his voice, he’s completely serious.
You feel heat rising up your neck and you try to get it under control before your cheeks turn red. “You think I’m hot?” You ask him, a teasing lilt in your voice.
“Not the point,” he replies.
“So you tell me that you would rather be single for the rest of your life than pretend to be my boyfriend, and now you want me to pretend I’m your girlfriend?” You clarify, and he just nods, like it’s no big deal. “Pretending to be together at an event is one thing, but you want to take photos to look like a couple? That’s a little… intimate don’t you think?”
Chris shrugs his shoulders. “I’m a big boy, you’re a big girl. Don’t think you can handle a little physical touch without falling for me?” He smirks, leaning in closer to you.
You grimace and reach up to push his shoulder away. “Gross, dude. I could have sex with you and still not fall in love with you and your terrible personality.”
Chris gasps, fake shocked, throwing a hand to his chest. “I am a very good lover, why do you think this girl won’t stop texting me?”
Your eyes widen. “You had sex with her?!” You shriek. “Chris, no wonder she keeps blowing your shit up!”
Chris groans and throws his head back, leaning it on the back of the couch. “It was supposed to be a one time thing, I don’t know why she’s so hung up on me!”
You find yourself giggling a bit before you stop and clear your throat, not wanting to give Chris the satisfaction of making you laugh. You compose yourself and shake your head, clearly disappointed in the boy across from you. “Fine, I’ll pretend to be your girlfriend, but no kissing! I draw the line at kissing.”
“Oh, you don’t have to worry, I don’t want to kiss you,” Chris cringes. “So… I guess we should start planning this?”
You nod and smile towards him, placing your hands in your lap as you guys start to figure out how to execute both individual plans.
-
a/n: this chapter is SUPER short but it’s kinda just to get a feel of the fic and how it’s gonna play out. I really hope you guys like this series im so nervous about it!!
taglist
@liiixsturniolos @madelinesturn @st6niolo @mattslolita @ifwdominicfike @sophand4n4 @chris-hallelujah @sophsturns @ariana2saucyy @045696
#chris sturniolo#matt sturniolo#sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo smut#matt x reader#matt x you#chris sturniolo fanfic#chris x you#christopher sturniolo#matthew sturniolo#chris x reader#chris#my fics
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