#what can i say I'm a freak

[ilikethisnamebutter]

*explodes*

[lgbtlunaverse]

The world exists in such a baffling state of simultaneous sex-aversion and sex-hegemony. Every social platform on the internet is trying to banish sex workers to the shadow realm but I can't post a tweet without at least two bots replying P U S S Y I N B I O. People are self-censoring sex to seggs and $3× but every other ad you see is still filled with half-naked women. Rightwingers want queer people arrested for so much as existing in the same postal code as a child and are also drumming up a moral panic about how teenage boys aren't getting laid enough. I feel like I'm losing my mind.

[vaguely-concerned]

the strength it must have taken for illario to not immediately go full 'lmao since when have you even had a kiss hello lucanis' sibling violence mode during the café talk. inspirational. rook and lucanis really were doing all that right in front of his salad huh

[flowerakatsuka]

nostalgic moments web kuji ( 2022 )

[backpackingspace]

Consider young odysseus and Penelope courting by going on adventures together (committing crimes)

[writinganon1]

@cokoweee

Ya’ll ever have a dream so lifelike it feels aggressively real until one thing goes a little too wrong and then you start to realize that maybe you’re in a dream but it’s also too real to convince yourself it’s not real that you can’t wake yourself up? 

TW: panic attack, I say gun, uhhh blood ig? Bishop says a kinda weird thing but that's just him bein him

can I say blood? last time I did it marked me as mature...

-

Her heart thumped against her chest, lactic acid building in her legs as she ran. She tapped furiously at her phone, fingers slipping over the screen as she tried to deploy Sheldon. 

Donnie says “no no no” chimed a pixilated picture of Othello, his finger waving back and forth. 

“What the-” She slammed against a wall, her shoulder crunching against the brick. 

His stupid programming on the poor thing to keep Sheldon at his house. Maybe she could override it? 

No, not enough time. She was just going to have to run and hope for the best. 

Her shoulder screamed in protest as she climbed the ladder in the alley. Scrambling over the side of the building to catch her breath, she tapped at the screen again. 

There had to be something she could do to foil his programming. She wiped at her nose, the cold still not quite gone even after days of bed rest. Bullets flew over the edge of the building, seemingly locking on to her body heat. Throwing herself at the ledge at the last second to force the bullets to crash into the wall she coughed violently, phlegm coating her throat.

Stupid sickness. 

Stupid Othello leaving her with the stupid rabbit farmer.

She pushed herself off the ground, arms struggling under the weight of herself. It was as if every muscle in her body was on fire, each fiber screaming at her to stop. She gulped raising her head over the ledge. Agent Bishop was standing on the adjacent rooftop, his face curled into a sneer, eyes unblinking despite the sun in his eyes. 

He waved at her, fingers waggling in the air as he pulled a small gun from his pocket. Aiming it directly at her chest he grinned, his eyes flickering with something distinctly unhuman. 

She stumbled backward, her feet skidding over the concrete as he seemed to lock onto her. Loose rock dug into her knees as she clambered over the rooftop. 

Away.

All she needed to do was get away. 

She placed a hand over her stomach, feeling the raised bump of the scar, as she moved.

This was…

This was wrong? 

It didn’t happen this way. 

No. She didn’t need to get away, she needed to get out. 

The bullet ripped into her skin, tearing away at muscle, and shattering the bone in her rib.

She screamed, blood pouring from the gaping hole in her chest, as Bishop moved closer. He walked to her side, footsteps clanking against the concrete. 

Clawing at the ground she dragged her body along the roof, rocks digging under her nails. Bishop laughed, his foot trampling her hand, digging it into the ground. She gasped, breathing shallowly as she fought to get loose. 

He grabbed her hair, wrapping it between his fingers and tightening his grip as he pulled her from the floor. 

“Oh, this is wonderful.” He smiled, voice dripping with venom. “Such a pretty little thing I caught this evening. I’ve been dying to chat with you.” He pulled her hair up, forcing her to rise. “I wonder if she’ll do any tricks?” 

She spat in his face, her ears filled with an all-consuming ringing. 

Away. 

She needed to get away. 

It didn’t matter how. She needed to get away. 

He said something else, flaunting some sort of mechanism he had hidden in his shirt. She tried to focus on his words, but her breathing was too shallow, her limbs too shaky, the ringing too loud for her to hear a word. 

She clamped a hand over her chest, a sorry attempt to staunch the flow of blood from the gaping hole in her body. Cursing softly she watched as the red seeped into a slithering pink fleshy mass. 

She stifled a scream as the pink turned an orange maroon, her own blood fueling some sort of monster. 

“Shhhhhhh.” Bishop whispered against her ear, “It’ll be done soon. Just one quick slash and you’ll be out of my hair for good.” 

The mass jumped forward, faster than she could comprehend, her body spasming in pain as she scrambled back.

Was this the Krang she’d heard so much about after she’d left the jail? Weren’t they supposed to be mindless or something? 

It lunged forward again, tentacles lashing toward her face. Bishop shook her in front of him, like a toy for a dog. 

“Kendra?”  

She screamed as he tightened his grip on her, shaking her around like a bag of flour. The world around her turned hazy, her vision blurring in and out. 

She wasn’t going to go out without a fight. 

Throwing her head back she jammed her skull into his chin, breaking the grip he had on her hair. 

She clawed at the ground, a strange silky feeling coating her fingers. Pushing away the softness of what was sure to be Krang, she kicked at the mass as it wiggled unnaturally. 

“KENDRA!” A familiar voice shouted at her, a gentle three-fingered nubby touch against her arm. 

Her eyes flew open, arms flailing to the sides to swat at what was left of the Krang matter, as hands held her back. She gasped, her chest heaving as a sinking feeling hit her gut. Dread splashed over her head like a wave, drowning her, leaving nothing but fear.

Eyes widening she looked next to her for Tello, horrified as darkness encroached on her vision, leaving her staring through a pin hole. Nausea rolled through her stomach as she gasped for air, her chest shuddering to keep up with her breathing. 

It hurt. It hurt so bad. 

“Hey, hey, hey.” He whispered, hand placed against her back. “It’s ok you’re home. You’re with me.” 

She jerked backward. He was loud. So so loud. Even with the ringing in her ears, he was too loud. 

Breaths were punched from her lungs faster than she could finish taking them in. Tears streamed down her face as her eyes blew wide. Her chest tightened, lungs twisting as she shook. 

She’s dying. She has to be dying. There’s no other explanation. 

Dead in her room from a nightmare-induced heart attack,  

Her eyes flickered back and forth over the room, not focusing on anything, just wildly scanning for danger she knew wasn’t there. Willing her arm to move, she let out a chocked warble. 

The room seemed to melt around her. Things blurred together, a fuzzy abstract painting of almost-real-life. Sweat beaded on her forehead as she tightened her muscles. 

Her whole body shook as she tried to take steadying breaths. 

“Did you know softshell turtles only have half a plastron?” 

She was in the middle of dying. 

She most definitely did not need turtle facts right now. 

“Technically a full one, but it’s covered by skin, rendering it effectively useless for plastron purposes.” He shrugs. “Same deal as the shell.” 

She looked at him, confusion breaking through the panic. 

“Makes us really flexible though. Wanna see?” 

He got off the bed, walked to the middle of the room, and bent backward. He smiled upside down at her from the floor and smoothly brought himself back up. 

“Pretty neat huh?” He waggled his eyebrows. “Bet no other turtle you meet could do that.” 

Amusement rippled through her as she watched him demonstrate his stretches and various yoga poses.

“I’ve never met another turtle like you.” She breathed, some of the panic melting away. 

“Precisely! No one can do it like me!” He said, pointing his finger at her triumphantly before his face softened. “ We starting to feel a bit better?” 

She brought her thumb and pointer finger close together. A little 

He nodded. “Am I good to come back up or do you need some space?” 

She patted the bed next to her, inviting him closer. She waited until he was seated comfortably before slumping against his shoulder, exhausted. 

He shifted slightly, reaching for his phone with one hand, the other wrapped around her. He let them sit for a moment, reminding her to breathe every few seconds before Sheldon zipped into the room. 

He whispered something to Othello before zooming out of the room. She watched passively as it happened, her body still not quite connected to her soul. 

Sheldon returned moments later, a bag of ice, a bottle of water, a cookie, and tub of lavender lotion in his little propeller arms. 

Othello took them from him, patted his head, and shooed him away. Taking one of the ice cubes he flattened out her hand and placed it in her palm. 

She jerked slightly at the sensation of cold in her hand, surprised when he placed another in her palm. 

“Focus on the melting.” He said, voice low and gentle. 

The ice filled the lines of her hand and dripped over the sides and down her arm. She shivered as the water pooled in her hand. Othello grabbed the cookie from the pile he had created and broke off half to give to her. 

“Thanks?”

He watched her carefully. “What does it taste like?” 

“A cookie?” She said through a mouthful, her hands still full of TV static. 

“I need details.” He pressed. 

She paused, taking a moment to consider the flavors in her mouth. “Vanilla, chocolate chips.” She took another bite. “ Like I left it in the oven a minute or two too long and overcooked them just slightly.” 

She’d have to make another batch, this time keeping an eye on the time. 

He pressed an uncapped water bottle into her hand. “Drink.” 

She pressed the bottle to her lips, feeling the way the cold blossomed against her skin as she held it there. Quietly observing the way she could feel it go down her throat and into her stomach. 

“Are we feeling more alive?” 

She nodded, running her hand along her thigh to feel the fabric of her pajama pants as she pressed her head against his side. 

“Good.” He murmured, sleep creeping into his voice. “You had a panic attack I’m pretty sure.” 

“...Sorry it was for something stupid.” 

“I get worked up over stupid stuff too.” He mumbled, eyes half closed. 

“Your stuff isn’t stupid.” She countered. 

“Then neither is yours.” 

She stopped, lifting her head to look up at him.

He grabbed her hand, flexing the fingers for her. “You feel ok?” 

“I don’t know.” She answered honestly. 

He nodded and guided her to a lying position. “Tell me five of your favorite things.” 

She paused, looking around the room. “Hmmmmm. You.” 

“Thank you.” 

“Mhm. Uhhh, lavender. The color purple. Satin jackets. Baking. Messing around in the lab. Oh, I guess that’s more than five.” 

He tapped her shoulders rhythmically, “You can keep going if you need to.” 

She took in a deep breath. “I think I’m ok now.” 

“Positive?” 

Nodding she pulled the blankets over herself. What she really needed was rest. She was so exhausted from the whole ordeal that the idea of doing anything else felt impossible. 

He got off the bed again, searching beneath the bedframe for something before he pulled a large purple blanket from under the bed. She blinked in surprise as he placed it over her, a weight holding her down to the bed. 

“I should’ve mentioned it was weighted.” 

She pulled her hand out to give a quick thumbs up as he climbed back into bed. She shifted to hold out her arm for a hug. He smiled and pulled her close, wrapping his arm around her waist. 

“You smell like you’ve been using my soap.” She grumbled against his plastron. 

He shrugged. “ I like the way you smell.” 

Rolling her eyes she tugged the blanket higher over her shoulders smiling as soft chirping filled the room, the sound he always made right as he fell asleep. 

“Good night Tello.” She whispered.

His plastron vibrated as he churred back, gently running circles through her hair. 

She was home. And she was safe.

~

squad don't write stuff at four AM I'm pretty sure this only makes sense to me at this point. Anyway I was listening to my pretty princess playlist while writing this 💁‍♀️

the reason why this was written is in the tags btw

[rouge-fauna]

[sarroora]

[underthenightskydreamsneverdie]

Little Wolf

Summary: After taking out an Ashwinder camp, Sebastian and MC have some feral sex in the woods.

Warnings: 18+, Outdoors sex, rough sex, spanking, degrading/humiliation, idk it's just really filthy guys

pairing: Sebastian x f!MC

Word count: 1289

A/N: @callmehopeless asked for outdoor feral sex and here is my contribution. This may be the filthiest thing I've ever written and I fucking love it. @pugsnotdrugs92 @sebswebs

------------------------

Sebastian took your hand, running into the night, his heart pounding in his chest. He spared one last glance over his shoulder at the ruined Ashwinder camp, his mind flashing with a memory just made; standing back to back with you, taking out enemies, never missing your targets as you moved in unison, spells firing in quick succession, the look in your eyes as you stood surrounded by bodies of your victims, the air around you simmering with remnants of your ancient magic.

Adrenaline coursed through both of your veins, with it an insatiable lust. He stopped running, pulling you into a small grove of trees, roughly pushing you up against the closest one. He didn’t ask, didn’t say a word, just ripped at your clothes. The moment you were naked he was on you, lips biting at yours, hands grabbing at your flesh, roughly squeezing a breast, a hip, raking across your body as he growled into your mouth. Breaking the kiss, his hands worked quickly to undo his pants, pushing them down enough to free his achingly hard cock. You whimpered as your hands slipped under his shirt, wordlessly begging him to take it off. He ripped at the buttons desperately, not wanting to wait a second more to have you. The shirt fell to the forest floor and his hands found your thighs, lifting you up, pressing you against the tree, shoving his cock inside you in one quick movement. He growled as he filled you, your warmth increasing his lust. He thrust hard and fast, each one scraping the bare skin of your back against the rough bark of the tree. You felt it digging in, cutting into you but you didn’t care. All that mattered was him. 

You loved this side of him, his desperate, animalistic desire for you. When he didn’t care if he hurt you, if you liked it, if you could be seen or heard, all that mattered was the chase of release. In these rare moments he wasn’t your love, your darling, your sweetheart, no, he was your wolf. You would do anything to encourage him to let go, give in to his primal desires, entice the wolf in him to come out to play with the wolf in you. 

Bringing your head to his shoulder you nipped at his skin, loudly moaning his name. As your first orgasm hit you dragged your nails down his back, leaving angry red marks on his freckled skin. The sting of it brought his own release and he paid you back in kind, his teeth sinking into your skin hard enough to draw blood. You crushed your lips against his bloody ones, groaning as you ran your tongue over his teeth, tasting your own blood. 

As his orgasm subsided he set you down, stepping away to undress fully before pulling you to him and sinking you both down to the forest floor. Pushing your hips into the dirt he spread your legs, his strong hands keeping them in place while he pushed back into you, burying himself in your wet pussy once again. He thrust into you as hard as he could, hitting that perfect spot inside you with every one. Lifting your leg he threw it over his shoulder, grunting uncontrollably, lost in his pleasure. Gripping your hips hard, he pulled you to meet him as his pace increased, the sounds of your skin slamming together echoing through the forest. When his orgasm rocked through him this time he let out a deep groan, the end of it turning into an outright howl as he shot his load deep inside you. You let yourself do the same as your own orgasm overtook you, hands digging into the dirt around you. 

His chest heaving as he came down from his high, you pressed on him, urging him back, forcing his cock out of you. Rolling over onto your stomach, pressing your face into the dirt, you raised your ass into the air, shaking it in front of his face. If you were going to act like lust crazed animals, you were going to let him fuck you like one. 

Finally he spoke his first word since leaving the destroyed camp. “Fuck.” You smirked, loving that you’d gotten to him, but it was the feel of his hand coming down on your ass that made you moan. He kneaded the soft flesh before bringing his hand down hard multiple times in a row, high pitched moans slipping from your lips. He slapped at your rear for a long time, switching between cheeks, hitting and kneading until you were almost crying from the growing sensitivity. Just when you thought he was done, you felt his wet mouth on the already bruising skin, sucking at it, nipping at it. 

“Sebastian.” You whimper his name softly not wanting to break him out of this animalistic state. “Fuck me. Fuck your Little Wolf.” 

He let out a muffled growl, your flesh between his teeth. His hand came down one more time as he slipped himself into your wet folds. Setting a much slower pace he pulled completely out of you, making you whimper at the loss, before plunging back in, all the way to the hilt. Finally in the mood to speak, he punctuated his words with  forceful thrusts. 

“Do you..have any idea..how..sexy it is..to watch you..take out a..camp full of..bad guys..with your ancient magic? Have you..any notion.. of the ways..it drives me..wild?” With each thrust you let out small pleasurable screams as his body slammed into the tender flesh of your ass. Your mouth open, dirt sticking to your lips, the scent of the damp earth filling your nostrils, your mind went blank as he continued to pound into you, nothing but the deliciously painful feel of him breaking through your fogged head.

“Look at you, a whimpering, bloody and bruised, dirt covered mess, giving yourself to me. Fuck you look so beautiful right now. The Hero of Hogwarts grinding her face into the dirt like an animal. My strong, willful, girl reduced to this all because of my cock.” 

You hated that you loved the way his degrading comments pushed you over the edge, a shockingly loud scream emanating from your throat as you came for him, bucking your hips wildly to meet his thrusts. With another loud howl he lost control, his own climax descending on him, pulling so far out of you, desperate to fuck you as hard as he could, half of his seed shooting onto the ground underneath you. 

As the last waves of your orgasms subsided, he pulled out, collapsing on the forest floor next to you. Letting your legs relax you stretched out to your full length, giggling as his seed smeared on your stomach, dirt and twigs sticking to your skin. Turning your head to face him, an arm coming out to rest on his chest, you laughed together. Loud, obnoxious, tear producing laughter. 

“Well that was interesting my Little Wolf. I like calling you that. Makes my blood race. Damn, you’re a mess darling.” He pulled a leaf from your hair, chuckling. 

Sitting up, you crawled over to him, climbing on top of his body. Rocking your hips, your sopping wet core rubbing against his cock, you smirked at him. “You’re not nearly messy enough, my sexy wolf. I’m going to change that.” Feeling his cock growing hard again you raised yourself up before sinking down on him. With a long groan you set to work riding him, leaves and dirt falling from your hair, no plans of stopping until he was just as dirty as you.

[thousandyearphantombunker]

i hate the fact the term karen went from describing a bitchy entitled customer to basically the modern day equivalent of calling a woman a harpy (misogynistic as fuck) and that people use the term on people out in public who are at the end of their rope emotionally from stress or a shitty day. I get it just because your having a rough time doesn't mean you get to be a dick but sometimes I think people are seriously lacking in empathy and I get it a lot shit the customer might be dealing with isn't your responsibility but like if a customer is struggling with something simple maybe don't be a dick? Just a thought.

[camellcat]

first xander brought her back with human breath and determination... then willow with supernatural power and love.... smth smth two halves to keep their third in balance from drifting too far into either side and losing herself.....

[thepoisonroom]

can i make a post about being irritated by antimaskers as a disabled person without annoying people trying to condescendingly explain accommodations for my disability to me! btw!

[sysig]

Okay but TSP/Portal crossover AU is such a cool concept, how have I never thought about that before?? I'd like to request Narra and GLaD hanging out watching their respective little guys go through tests like 'can you believe them they're so dumb <3'

Day 30 - They're absolute hellions

Bonus:

Noooo, my bucket!!

[fisheito]

on one hand, i can make olivine the biggest juiciest bottom where eiden has to top him with climbing gear attached

on the other hand, i could make olivine the equally powerful priestly short king who only reaches eiden's bellybutton but can twirl that boy around his finger like a weighty necklace

[roz-ani]

What am I doing in the jayvik ship tag I DON'T EVEN SHIP THEM-

It's the art

It's always the goddamn art

[celtrist]

Why does Vassago already have merch, we haven't even met him yet