#what are you supposed to do

[carefulfears]

thinking about the x files does a lot of show and not tell. specifically thinking about three words and mulder's struggling with this new reality and scully barely hanging on

three words is in my top ten episodes, i truly love it so much and i think it's such a raw portrayal of something that people typically miss in these story arcs. you're literally confronted in the opening with exactly what is going on behind the surface: the pain and the fear behind each scar that mulder can touch. and what i love so much about this episode and this season is that it offers a completely different response to trauma than we normally see from him. it's so much harsher. he came back with rough edges. all of his jokes are so heavy, he can't even attempt to put his weight behind them.

and i understand that it's hard to watch, because scully tried so hard for so long, and there is no relief. she looked for him and she tried to save him and she tried to be him and she tried to keep his work intact. she maintained his home and she fed his fish and she slept with his laundry and she grew his child. and like she says, she prayed and prayed and prayed, and she suffered and suffered and suffered. she planned a funeral and a nursery at the same time. she was ripped screaming off of his cold body. and three months later, there he is, whispering bad jokes under her tears. scully believes in miracles.

and there is still no relief. not for everybody. just waking up and being alive isn't all that matters, it matters that living is hard too. it matters that he can't touch his face without remembering being ripped apart. it matters that walking into his home feels unfamiliar. it matters that even though she tried, there's one less fish. there's a new partner in his office. there's a new baby about to be born, he missed everything. and if you ask him how he feels he'll say, "like austin powers," and no one will laugh. if you walk him into his apartment, the first thing he'll notice is the failed change. if you tell him he's your answered prayers, he'll brush it off until you cry.

scully raised him from the dead, and his first steps are to a suicide mission. it is so mean. he knew that breaking into that facility would kill him. had killed everyone else. he was told that, he was begged not to go. and in a moment, doggett has to run through the census bureau under fire, and drag him out. all three of the tlg boys are in the ceiling navigating. very pregnant scully is near-tears in the parking lot. no relief. miracles, not magic.

and i just love all of it. the bitter jokes that don't land. the casual cruelty. the false starts. the honesty. the way that no matter what, mulder is still mulder, there will always be some sign that things are going to be okay, like the way he tells scully that he just has to make sure what happened to him doesn't happen to someone else. the way he quietly apologizes, says that he doesn't mean to be cold, he just doesn't know where he fits in. he's having trouble processing. slow returns.

[unrealblacklightvirus]

every moment tempts me with just @ -ing all the alex variants just to see what would happen

[lilithlite]

Mami: Homura what's wrong?

Homura: (who suddenly had 26 years of memory beamed into her head) Oh my god my girlfriend

Kyoko: What?

Sayaka: Huh?

Homura: Oh my god. Oh my god

[httpshujii]

OKAY SO I DOWNLOADED THIS KINDA NEW LANGUAGE LEARNING APP THAT HAS A TINDER LAYOUT (I SHOULDVE DELETED IT WHEN I SAW THAT BUT NOOO IM JUST TOO DUMB SOMETIMES) AND THEN STARTED USING IT YK. LIKE ANY OTHER APP.

SO LIKE TWO WEEKS AGO I GET A FRIEND REQUEST FROM THIS GUY AMD I ACCEPT IT AND HE TEXTS ME. AND OFC I TEXT HIM BACK BECAUSE I WANT TO MAKE FRIENDS AND I SAY SOMETHING LIKE “hi!! how are you doing” AND HE DEADASS REPLIES WITH “im master baiting (misspelled it rn on purpose cuz i just hate that word don’t question me pls😔) cuz you so sexy in the profile photos” AND ATP IM LIKE … you’re a fake account, right? and he actually isn’t a fake account (which makes this 10 times worse) and he sends me a dicpic🤒 and i’m bracing myself cuz im pretty sure he’s about to ask for something in return and spoiler: he does😍. so atp im just laughing and having the time of my life on there so i send him a random ss o of a video from ph and leave it at that.

then he texts me for two more days, and i don’t reply and he’s like “why u not responding do you not like me ☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️” and while talking to a friend i tell her about the convo and she says “just say some crazy shit and see if he still keeps texting you.” and so i told him i was in the hospital because i got stabbed and robbed while i was out hoping he’s gonna get scared and think i live in the most gruel place ever and leave me alone.

BUT HE DOESNT. AND HE ACTUALLY SEEMS CONCERNED. AND I TALK A BIT MORE WITH HIM (out of guilt) and with some exceptions of being super fucking cringe he’s actually nice amd wants to get to know me ☹️ and today while i was sleeping (timezones yk) he sent me a video of him singing last christmas and telling me what i quoted in my post ☹️ and now im really guilty because he’s nice (with some exceptions bc sometimes he !!!almost!!! returns to his old ways) and idk i just don’t think i find him attravtive in that way or something i guess. but that lil video lowkey made my stomach do flips☹️

EW AND AW personally, I would usually say no but this is a confusing situation tbh

[melandrops]

and whatever you do, don't ever ask me to rate my pain on a scale of 1-10

[thatrandomblogsays]

Annabeth: I, a child, had to earn Thalia’s love, that’s how the world works! I have to earn my moms love. Love is transactional, you gotta be worthy of it first silly :)

Percy, listening to this on the train

[mynnthia]

was talking with a friend about how some of dunmeshi fаndom misunderstands kabru's initial feelings towards laios.

to sum up kabru's situation via a self-contained modernized metaphor:

kabru is like a guy who lost his entire family in a highly traumatic car accident. years later he joins a discord server and takes note of laios, another server member who seems interesting, so they start chatting. then laios reveals his special interest and favorite movie of all time is David Cronenberg's Crash (1996), and invites kabru to go watch a demolition derby with him

[salamander-crimes]

what is it about the least canon-compliant aromantic headcanons that makes them the best. like when a character shows no romantic attraction okay that is pretty awesome. but when romance is a big part of a character/plot? oh now we're fucking cooking

[xxplastic-cubexx]

obligatory beach divorce doodling

bonus rough cover redraw of x-men #41 (1995) But Beach Divorce below cut

[givemeureyes]

day 1 without ao3: i have gone through all 5 stages of grief multiple times and have invented a 6th. i will not disclose what the 6th stage of grief is.

[ddejavvu]

Just saw a TikTok complaining about ‘kitten’ as a pet name in fanfiction and while I do agree with/understand their discomfort on that one the comments were FULL of people mentioning all the other common pet names ?? Like honey babe baby sweetheart etc ?? Is your partner just supposed to call you by your name the whole time ????????

[chloesimaginationthings]

These clown animatronics in FNAF wild as hell..

[autogynecologist]

Thurston's Orange Peel Theory

[inkskinned]

the thing is that they're so fascinated by sex, they love sex, they can't imagine a world without sex - they need sex to sell things, they need sex to be part of their personality, they need sex to prove their power - but they hate sex. they are disgusted by it.

sex is the only thing that holds their attention, and it is also the thing that can never be discussed directly.

you can't tell a child the normal names for parts of their body, that's sexual in nature, because the body isn't a body, it's a vessel of sex. it doesn't matter that it's been proven in studies (over and over) that kids need to know the names of their genitals; that they internalize sexual shame at a very young age and know it's 'dirty' to have a body; that it overwhelmingly protects children for them to have the correct words to communicate with. what matters is that they're sexual organs. what matters is that it freaks them out to think about kids having body parts - which only exist in the context of sex.

it's gross to talk about a period or how to check for cancer in a testicle or breast. that is nasty, illicit. there will be no pain meds for harsh medical procedures, just because they feature a cervix.

but they will put out an ad of you scantily-clad. you will sell their cars for them, because you have abs, a body. you will drip sex. you will ooze it, like a goo. like you were put on this planet to secrete wealth into their open palms.

they will hit you with that same palm. it will be disgusting that you like leather or leashes, but they will put their movie characters in leather and latex. it will be wrong of you to want sexual freedom, but they will mark their success in the number of people they bed.

they will crow that it's inappropriate for children so there will be no lessons on how to properly apply a condom, even to teens. it's teaching them the wrong things. no lessons on the diversity of sexual organ growth, none on how to obtain consent properly, none on how to recognize when you feel unsafe in your body. if you are a teenager, you have probably already been sexualized at some point in your life. you will have seen someone also-your-age who is splashed across a tv screen or a magazine or married to someone three times your age. you will watch people pull their hair into pigtails so they look like you. so that they can be sexy because of youth. one of the most common pornography searches involves newly-18 young women. girls. the words "barely legal," a hiss of glass sand over your skin.

barely legal. there are bills in place that will not allow people to feel safe in their own bodies. there are people working so hard to punish any person for having sex in a way that isn't god-fearing and submissive. heteronormative. the sex has to be at their feet, on your knees, your eyes wet. when was the first time you saw another person crying in pornography and thought - okay but for real. she looks super unhappy. later, when you are unhappy, you will close your eyes and ignore the feeling and act the role you have been taught to keep playing. they will punish the sex workers, remove the places they can practice their trade safely. they will then make casual jokes about how they sexually harass their nanny.

and they love sex but they hate that you're having sex. you need to have their ornamental, perfunctory, dispassionate sex. so you can't kiss your girlfriend in the bible belt because it is gross to have sex with someone of the same gender. so you can't get your tubes tied in new england because you might change your mind. so you can't admit you were sexually assaulted because real men don't get hurt, you should be grateful. you cannot handle your own body, you cannot handle the risks involved, let other people decide that for you. you aren't ready yet.

but they need you to have sex because you need to have kids. at 15, you are old enough to parent. you are not old enough to hear the word fuck too many times on television.

they are horrified by sex and they never stop talking about it, thinking about it, making everything unnecessarily preverted. the saying - a thief thinks everyone steals. they stand up at their podiums and they look out at the crowd and they sign a bill into place that makes sexwork even more unsafe and they stand up and smile and sign a bill that makes gender-affirming care illegal and they get up and they shrug their shoulders and write don't say gay and they get up, and they make the world about sex, but this horrible, plastic vision of it that they have. this wretched, emotionless thing that holds so much weight it's staggering. they put their whole spine behind it and they push and they say it's normal!

this horrible world they live in. disgusted and also obsessed.

[hinamie]

sry i have chronic only draws megumi disorder the doctor said it's terminal :/

[improvapocalyps]

You have 90 minutes to complete. (original poem: r.a.)

In participation of the MCYT Recursive Exchange 2024 hosted by @mcytrecursive!

Inspired by know that all my love will be your breath (i will save you when your lights go out)

[text under cut]

1. Have you ever been in love? (Please circle your answer.) a. It's me and him b. Our hearts beat in sync c. Our lives intertwined

2. Do you understand what you’ve done? (Please circle your answer.) a. I couldn't do anything b. I lost my balance c. I doomed us both

3. It's been god knows how long since you felt phantom hands on your neck and there is no one in sight. If you were soul-bound to him and both of you died at the same time then why are you still waiting in the void? Please answer clearly, in full sentences. (Not a correct answer：I just wanted to see him one more time).

4. Define two (2)： Fate | The feeling of his forehead against yours Curse | The moment you realise he isn't linked to you anymore

5. True or False： i. It was your fault. ii. You wish you had met him under different circumstances. iii. You can’t regret a single moment that you had him. iv. You would do it all over again if you could. v. It ended long before either of you said anything.

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