#what an adhd mood tbh
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He's just like me for real
#ryan bergara#ryan and shane#ryan i love you#hes just like me for real#all hail the watcher#watcher network#we are watcher#watcher#dish granted#ricky wang#steven lim#shane madej#ghost files#the professor#mystery files#welcome to puppet history#puppet university#puppet history#what an adhd mood tbh#it truly be like this sometimes#he may have a touch of the tism#theres nothing wrong with that#me too ryan my boy
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Hey so you know Sunless Skies. Are you aware of the secret fourth Ambition? If so, there's something about it which haunts my dreams and has for years, and I need to spread the brainrot. If not, disregard this message, I don't want to give unsolicited spoilers. Sorry if the nature of the ask is in and of itself a spoiler.
i am indeed aware of it!!! i'm planning on pursuing it once i finish my current ambition in my current (and first) playthrough (the truth. i'm doing the truth as my very first ambition. because i apparently love to suffer and simply cannot do things by halves.)
#im currently playing sskies at an excruciatingly slow pace#bc like most video games i have it sitting on the steam library shelf until im in the mood to play it for 5 straight uninterrupted hours#and i dont touch it for a second sooner or longer#(blame the adhd on that one)#but i dont mind spoilers as long as they're vague or just completely batshit insane enough#especially in a setting like FL. which feels tailor made for that sort of thing#ask#sunless skies#i should talk about my sskies playthrough more often tbh..#i feel like i mention it literally every time this game comes up (which admittedly isnt that often)#but it is technically a non-canonical spinoff of scoundrel lore#i really really really enjoy what ive played so far. a good majority of my playtime (like. 20 or 30 hours already?)#has just been running around doing inventory management fetch quests#it just brings joy to my little autistic heart i guess
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wanted to share the sentiment here too but didn't feel like rewriting the whole thing lmao so here are some Thoughts i had last night on twt regarding my weird relationship with my art whilst being in fandom:
i know i've definitely talked about this kind of thing in the past but it's been a very recent development that i actually understand what's been going on with me and why i've picked up this habit of letting a fandom i'm in / a piece of media i'm really into fully dictate my creative drive. like, just because i'm very interested or invested in something, it doesn't mean i necessarily feel inspired by it or inspired by it for the duration that it holds my interest, and forcing myself to create relative art or fic or what have you for the vested interest(s) has both dampened my desire to be creative as well as my imagination. i know a lot of people can be super into something or a few random things at once and that can keep them going for ages without them running out of ideas, but in my case, things that hold my interest aren't always synonymous with my creativity and i'm just now learning that despite how obvious it seems!
i also imagine i'm not the only person who functions like this but i personally haven't seen it spoken about very often (if it even needs to idk), so i wanted to bring it up / talk about it a little bit :)
#art things#alex talks#if you've been following me for awhile or at least saw this coming before i did: does it not at all seem obvious lmao#i think the guilt i was feeling for so long over it being my 'obligation' as an artist in any fandom to only cater to fandom was also#exacerbated by some kind of impostor syndrome like... wait why is this so easy for other people also into x but not me?#makes sense now why i seem to lose steam so fast when i'm making work for one thing at a time only#i need to spice it up!! even if i come back to something eventually i can't force it!#thank u adhd my behated for another extension of my executive dysfunction but i guess#i will learn to work with it :) shedding the guilt has been the hardest part and ik i'll still struggle at times to be inspired or feel#like i need to be doing something specific to cater to other people rather than go with what drives me at the moment but#that's ok! that's life!#here's to me making a lot more art / general creative stuff 🫡 i hope the utter randomness of what i have in store#appeases at least one other person 🫶#sidenote 1d fics will still be eventually finished but 1d art.... we'll have to see bc of the ipad wipe :')#also haven't been in the mood for awhile tbh! been into another stuff and less generally hyperfixated (thank god)#anyway onto better days and more creation!!
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you know i never had end of summer/ back to school dread as a kid/ student but fuck as an adult this shit sucks. it's not even like i didn't have work over the summer! i just wfh in summers and i do NOT want to deal with people or the office or needing to wear things other than yoga pants and comfy t shirts. or dealing with the long periods of time where i have nothing to do but have to be there anyway so have to find a way to make myself look busy ><
#quilleth in real life#one of my kitties is also not doing well at all now either which is probably not helping my mood#:( don't want to go back to work and also not looking forward to having to make that decision with my kitty baby#been in a weird mood since sunday evening tbh#but like..what's new. a bitch has depression and adhd#just hopping from thing to thing to distract myself :/
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top 5 bands?
I'm going to interpret this as top 5 music artists because otherwise we're getting nowhere with this lmao
In no specific order - Yonkagor - Ivycomb - Cavetown - The Living Tombstone - CG5
Honourable mentions is all the vocaloid and anime intros/outros I listen to from nobody specific enough to mention. Also the artists of the covers of songs I listen to because I like them Very Much, plus they've made a few originals that are really cool too! (Rachie, AmaLee, and Will Stetson for instance)
#This top 5 is subject to change too it's just a majority of what I've been listening to lately. It really just depends on my mood tbh#Except YonKaGor they're always at the top for me tbh#Idk I listen to a lot of music#I listen to So Much actually#My ADHD actually makes it really hard to focus in slower situations without background music#Like I get a lot calmer if it is going on (I really need to get new travel headphones hkghjk)#skraptorcontent#ask
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yapper
I feel like I truly just live for my friends and the people in my life and I can't describe it super well in words right now but ahh just the aching and yearning I have for my friends they are the world to me and I wouldn't be the same without each of them.
I think I often find myself wanting more in friendships (I mean like hanging out/talking more or as much as possible, psychical affection like hugging and stuff if we don't really do that very much and they're not against it, etc) but I won't usually be the one to initiate anything like that because I can never tell where I stand with people cause I'm bad at reading people plus I'm just anxious/insecure whatever in general so I will be super doubtful all the time so like 1) I don't want to pressure people, 2) if someone else is the one to initiate that kinda stuff it feels way more genuine to me because I know I'm not forcing anything, 3) sometimes I think I care so deeply about people that it would be impossible for anyone to care about me the same way
I don't know why I'm thinking about this it's late and maybe I had too much sugar or not enough water or something
#qwlyapsalot#this made me realize some other things about myself but that's over sharing for another day#i might have a couple attachment issues#i think tbh i was just thinking about how i wanted a hug and then i spiralled#im not even in a bad mood i just wanted a hug i mean it's cold idk#i also want a burger#i like how I've completely abandoned any proper usage of these tags and now I'm just adding bonus thoughts to the end here. like a dessert.#this is also what i use parantheses for in sentences because i always have extra thoughts (i have adhd)
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[ᴍᴏɴꜱᴛᴇʀ ᴡʜᴏ ᴀᴛᴇ ᴀ ꜱᴛᴀʀ]
ᴛᴇᴏᴊɪʀᴀ (ᴇꜱᴛ 2ᴋ24)
《Introduction》 +
《! Please read me !》
¤ Hi! My name is Teddy and this blog as it says on the tin, is a multifandom blog! I'm into a wide range of characters and interests, so I'm sure I have something that'll strike your fancy!
¤ This is an 18+ blog. This is to keep me and you safe should you be a minor. Please stay away! I can't police you, but use common sense.
¤ I will not deal with discourse here, don't like what I write or who I write for? Block me and move on, I don't care.
¤ I am a woman person of color, no hatred towards ANY group is tolerated here. It will end in an IP address block.
¤ My interests fluctuates alot, I have severe adhd and some characters will get special treatment depending on which mood I am in!
¤ I'm always down to chat and make conversation but please remember I'm human and I have a job outside of tumblr, this is just a hobby for me! Please be kind and understanding.
《RULES/GUIDELINES》
¤ Every character I will write romantic ideas for must be of age. Any minor will ONLY be platonic. (Exception being the tmnt brothers, they are aged up accordingly.)
¤I write comfort, fluff, angst, pretty much anything tbh.
¤ My own rule of thumb is that if a furry character is sentient, can consent and is of age, and speaks/thinks/acts like a human, it is akin to monster loving. (Harkness scale pretty much). I don't care for your take on it, block me if you disagree!
¤ I will not write nsfw if you are on anon, your age must be somewhere on your blog. I will delete it from my askbox.
¤ A please and a thank you go a long way!
¤ I usually write with she/her pronouns or gender neutral pronouns.
¤ I am not looking for critique, this is all for fun. This is a heavy boundary, I will block if you do this.
¤ NSFW will be tagged accordingly so you can black list, if I forget to tag something, kindly let me know. I am not responsible for your experience beyond that, act accordingly if I write something you don't like.
¤ Please include some details with your requests, such as character and a general idea on what you'd like me to write! Please don't write an essay in my ask box.
¤ Things I will not write: Pregnancy, Underage, harder kinks (Scat/Noncon/vore/piss), Character harming reader physically, Parenthood, character x character.
Not sure if I write something? Just shoot me a text!
¤ Do NOT share my writing anywhere else (Quotev, Ao3, wattpad, Tiktok). A Simple reblog is appreciated here and only on tumblr.
¤ Comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated! It's nice to know something I wrote was loved!
And finally what we've all been waiting for, put your hands together for the :
《 Fandoms I write for》
Genshin impact
Honkai Star rail
Transformers
Tmnt
Monsterverse (platonic only for the Kaijus)
Planet of the apes (remake) (NO nsfw)
My hero academia (Dabi and Tomura only)
Demon slayer
Overwatch
Twisted wonderland
Devil may cry
Apex legends (Revenant only)
Fire emblem three houses
Puss in boots: the last wish (Death only)
Stranger things (Eddie Munson only)
Red dead redemption 2
The Wolf among us (Bigby only)
Five nights at freddys: Security Breach
Sonic (platonic for everyone except Shadow)
DC comics/ DCEU
Horror icons/slashers
Countless other video game characters probably lmao.
Though I write for many fandoms, I'm more comfortable with specific characters so I'll let you know if I'm comfortable enough to write for them!
Don't see a character you're sweet on? No worries, shoot me a text and I'll see if I know anything about them to whip something up for ya!
ᴛʜᴀɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜ ᴠᴇʀʏ ᴍᴜᴄʜ ꜰᴏʀ ʀᴇᴀᴅɪɴɢ ᴀɴᴅ ɪ ʜᴏᴘᴇ ᴛᴏ ʜᴇᴀʀ ꜰʀᴏᴍ ʏᴏᴜ ꜱᴏᴏɴ!
☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆
#genshin impact x reader#honkai star rail x reader#planet of the apes x reader#transformers x reader#tmnt x reader#teenage mutant ninja turtles x reader#my hero academia x reader#demon slayer x reader#overwatch x reader#twisted wonderland x reader#devil may cry x reader#Revenant x reader#fire emblem x reader#bigby wolf x reader#rdr2 x reader#sonic x reader#slashers x reader#mortal kombat x reader#fnaf x reader#wuthering waves x reader
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I know you aren’t a doctor, but is there anything else that, to your knowledge, tends to get diagnosed by alt-doctors as CIRS?
So this is probably going to piss some people off, but I genuinely believe that CIRS (which as I've talked about before as being... questionable as a diagnosis) is more likely to be a mast cell disorder.
The science and reasoning around CIRS and the obsession with "toxins" and mold is just too vague, and I say that as someone who was at one point diagnosed as CIRS and went through the whole process only to be met with HEAVY resistance from my alt doctors when I wanted to know WHY something was "toxic" and why I wasn't improving despite doing what they recommended.
They couldn't explain it. Thing Just Bad. And if I wasn't improving, it was my fault for not removing enough "toxins" from my environment.
Well, turns out some of those things weren't universally "toxic," I just have an immune disorder (MCAS) that makes them toxic to me, where my body thinks harmless things are a threat-- including my own hormonal cycle!
There was mold killing me, though, that was indeed making my mast cells unstable and sending me into anaphylaxis on a regular basis and causing all kinds of neurological problems. Mast cell stabilizers and removing the mold from my home did more good for me than any of the CIRS treatments.
(Important note: not everyone with MCAS experiences anaphylaxis as a symptom, and it is not a requisite of diagnosis.)
MCAS is not the only form of mast cell dysfunction either. There's also mastocytosis and Hereditary Alpha tryptasemia. You can read more about them at The Mast Cell Disease Society. (There are also different types of MCAS for anyone interested.)
Other things I've seen alt-doctors misdiagnose as CIRS over the years include:
Dysautonimia (high rates of comorbidity with MCAS)
Fibromyalgia (some recent research suggests that mast cells play a role in the onset of fibromyalgia)
ME/CFS (chronic fatigue syndrome)
ADHD
Autism
Celiac Disease
Multiple Chemical Sensitivity Disorder (which I also think is mast cell related, tbh.)
Pernicious Anemia (the other thing that was killing, because my untreated MCAS was stopping me from absorbing nutrients from my food)
Chronic migraines.
SIBO (which can lead to secondary MCAS)
Various different mood disorders
Interstitial Cystitis (also a common symptom of various mast cell disorders)
And I'm sure a couple more I'm just forgetting right now.
Basically, there are a lot of things CIRS could actually turn out to be. But my money is on some form of mast cell fuckery.
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Shattered dream sans x a reader who works for nightmare- [idk if this is what you mean by like you know writing reqs-]
Cas and Null decided to write this together! Hope you enjoy <3
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Alright, this is probably gonna get real complicated REAL FAST
Man is crazy (obvi)
But he’s thankfully (or maybe not thankfully) crazy for you
Uhhh… good luck with that…
So man, this can go a few ways… None of which are probably good lol
Let’s say you’re close to Nightmare before stuff hits the fan. Well, as close as you can get to him…
He’s kinda emotionally constipated, but we love him (kinda)
Nightmare, if he actually gives a damn about you, probably would be… let’s just say “reluctant” to have you around his newly corrupted brother.
He trusted him even less now tbh
BUT
I mean, at least he’s not suspiciously nice anymore??? /j
So, man’s crazy x2 so both of them are kinda trying to manipulate you in order to “see their side”
Basically, they’re fighting over you. One as a romantic interest and the other as platonic… probably.
But basically, neither are exactly “right”
You were doing a pretty good job at trying to stay away from Shattered!Dream until, one day, he managed to corner you when you were really sleepy
“Oh, poor thing. Aren’t you tired of mercilessly working for that…. Imbecile brother of mine? Come here, rest your head.” Shattered cooed at you from the other end of the room, watching you stumble your way into your house after a particularly rough mission. How did he even get in here? You were too tired to care. You shuffled over to him and slumped down at his feet, resting your head in his lap. He places his hand on your head, tenderly stroking your hair and murmuring sweet nothings.
So naturally, you were like “whaT THE FU-”
Nah, you totally didn’t suspect anything. I mean, how different could Shattered!Dream be from his old self? (very different, as you’d come to find out)
You hadn’t slept in literal days, you’d just come back from one of Nightmare’s missions, things got messy in that mission, “your husband is dead, we found him with no head” type shenanigans.
(… the frick did I just say???? ADHD brain is wack as frick, don’t do vegetables, kids)
Your brain was confused and static-y (is that a neurodivergent thing???) and you were just done by that point
You were kinda not too trusting of him, buuuuut… his lap was comfortable, what else can I say, Your Honor?
(I was just in a silly goofy kinda mood, so I fell asleep on my mortal enemy’s lap)
His voice was relaxing, his lap cozy, the mood just right, and you were exhausted beyond belief
So what did you do?
You fell asleep
Anyways
I have no idea if any of this is coherent
When you woke up (like 16 hours later, thanks to exhaustion) you found that you were in your bed.
You, not knowing wtf just happened, are confused, of course.
Was that all a Dream? Well, Dream was involved but NO, IT WAS NOT A DREAM
HIT THE PANIC BUTTON
You have gay panic for a bit until you see the note on your bedside table
He called you mi cielito in the letter.
Mi cielito?? Depending on if you know Spanish, you may be a little confused. Means “my little sky”... what can I say, he’s a sucker for Moon, Sun, Stars, Sky, etc. motifs
Same
Alright, so…
Thankfully, unlike Nightmare, he’s probably not gonna leave dead birds outside of your doorstep
(probably)
You know, for someone that doesn’t really like cats (we all know what I’m talking about), Nightmare sure does act like one… Neko! Nightmare coming up? (I know the word “neko” just dealt +40 psychic damage to one of you out there)
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Alright, I didn’t really answer your request but I am PLANNING on making this a smol series. So like… a few parts? I just really want to get this out! :]
Cas was sorta working off of first caffeine in week, combined with not sleeping in over 24 hours.
Hope you enjoyed! Please, feel free to send as many requests as you want!
#shattered dream sans#undertale sans#undertale#undertale au#shattered dream#dream sans#dreamtale#writing#writing requests#shattered!dream#sans#sans x reader
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What are your headcanons for your holoforms of the Rescue Bots?
I have a few different headcanons for my holoforms! Just remember these are my own personal opinions, you don't have to agree 100% with them
I am going to be more specifically talking about my Cyberaligned lore, but these can also translate to general headcanons
The Holoform Headcanons
Age
So I have talked about my headcanons for their Cybertronians ages before, but these are what those ages translate to in human terms the holoforms more often then not will resemble their respective ages
Heatwave: 25
Chase: 24
Blades: 35
Boulder: 23-24
Side characters
Quickshadow: 25
Blurr: 19
Salvage: 20
Hightide: 55
Holoform Races
These are the races and ethnicities that holoforms appear as.
Heatwave: Yaqui mixed
Chase: Japanese
Blades: Indian and Black
Boulder: Samoan and Black
Side characters
Quickshadow: British and Korean
Blurr: White
Salvage: Black
Hightide: Scottish
Pronouns
What human pronouns the bots have chosen to use.
Heatwave: He/Him but doesn't care too much
Chase: He/They
Blades: They/She/He depends on mood
Boulder: He/Him
Side characters
Quickshadow: She/Her
Blurr: He/Him
Salvage: They/He
Hightide: Uses anything, does not give a fuck
Heights
The heights the holoforms generally appear at. They have control over the height of their holoforms as well as other physical features.
Heatwave: 6'2
Chase: 5'8
Blades: 6'4
Boulder: 5'4
Side characters
Quickshadow: 5'4
Blurr: 5'5
Salvage: 6'6
Hightide: 6'8
Scars
The damages they received in bot forms will appear on their holoforms.
Heatwave: Fire burn scar from training covering his back.
Chase: Minor scars from rescues. Lichtenberg scars equivalent, caused by both his outlier ability (electricity) and being STUCK BY LIGHTNING
Blades: Rescue related scars. And specifically to Cyberaligned, their shadow play scars are the most prominent scars, but they have several more from their time in the war.
Boulder: Minor rescue related scars
Side characters
Quickshadow: Many scars from the war. Has a large one crossing over her forehead and temple area.
Blurr: Some scars from rescue missions. In Cyberaligned has a prosthetic left arm from his time with M.E.C.H., as well as scars revealing the dissection he went through
Salvage: Has scars from their encounter with M.E.C.H. in Cyberaligned, however was saved early on and did not suffer much.
Hightide: Many scars from the war. Most prominent is the one over his face and chest.
Queer Orientations
TBH, Cybertronians are genetically asexual and do not have genders. But this is just fun stuff I like to think of for if they were actually humans
Heatwave: Biromantic (fem preferred)
Chase: PanAegoromantic or Cupioromantic for RB, but for Cyberaligned it is hard to categorize him within the Aro identity due to lore.
Blades: Homoromantic (aka GAY AS FUC-)
Boulder: Demi-romantic Gay
Side characters
Quickshadow: Biromantic (equal preference for fem and masc)
Blurr: Biromantic (no real preference for a certain gender)
Salvage: Homoromantic
Hightide: Apothiromantic (though does not have a strong repulsive urge)
Disabilities
Both mental and physical disabilities are included here. I did as much research as possible and only used disabilities I am knowledgeable in for this.
Heatwave: Generalized anxiety. Some back problems in Cyberaligned as he used to work in the mines
Chase: Autism
Blades: PTSD, Autism, ADHD, generalized anxiety, depression
Boulder: Autism, and if he were to remain within his caste he would have self image issues similar to Bulkhead as well as muscle issues as I have him in the construction caste
Side characters
Quickshadow: PTSD, bipolar depression
Blurr: ADHD. In Cyberaligned has a prosthetic/replacement left arm and PTSD
Salvage: Generalized anxiety and PTSD symptoms after M.E.C.H. encounter
Hightide: PTSD, depression, generalized anxiety
I do have some updated art of their holoforms coming out at some point, I have been busy with zines though so I have not been able to work on it. But soon y'all will see their updated looks!
#these are all my opinions#if you disagree with a headcanon#i do not care#that the beauty of fandom#we can have so many different ideas about our favs#tbh kinda based blade's mental issues off of mine#rescue bots#transformers rescue bots#tfrb#ask answered#anon ask#mystic chaos#mysticfox rambles#heatwave rescue bots#chase rescue bots#blades rescue bots#boulder rescue bots#rescue bots quickshadow#rescue bots blurr#tfrb salvage#tfrb hightide#tf headcanons
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howdy!! i was wonderin’ if you could list all the cats that are neurodivergent or have a mental disorder, and specifically what conditions? i was also hopin’ if you could expand upon how they present as well, but you don’t have to do all of them! you can pick and choose. or none at all if you’re tired! idm ‘:3
warriors and psychiatry are two of my SIs so i just wanna gobble up all of this information LOL
Sure! Though, I want to preface by saying that I try to make sure I'm very well acquainted with the neurodivergence I plan to add before adding it. I've always had a, "try not to overextend" sort of philosophy, trying to make sure each portrayal is going to be treated well in the narrative before promising it publicly
SO what that means is that this list is incomplete and I plan to add more, as I learn more about how to accurately portray something. Especially important with the more stigmatized disorders on this list-- for example I plan to add NPD once I have a better idea for how to feature it.
C-PTSD
Life in the Clans is VIOLENT. Most, or many, characters are going to end up with symptoms of PTSD, especially the cats who lived through the Plague, TigerClan, the entire Mothermouth Moorland War, and the destruction of the White Hart Woods in particular.
But C-PTSD is something I'm choosing more carefully, if that makes sense, so that it's something I write with 'higher priority' when approaching that particular character.
Birchfall (Human activity and child starvation are his triggers, also visibly unsettled by falling trees)
Brightheart (Dogs and dishonor titles, has recurring nightmares, self-harms through overexertion; refuses to take breaks to punish herself)
Stormfur (Severe trust issues, self-destructs relationships)
Lilyheart (Can't deal with water because she watched a sibling die instead of her)
Harrybrook ("big mood lilyheart")
There will also be some cats in WindClan who aren't able to eat rabbit, because it triggers memories of poison and causes them to wretch. This causes serious issues for them, because rabbit is the majority of the WindClan diet, especially in winter.
Epilepsy
Sorreltail (Absence seizures caused by brain damage from nightshade poisoning)
Shadowsight (Severe clonic-tonic seizures, Tawnypelt brings him to the Tribe to seek a very special treatment for him)
I reaaaaally need to add more here tbh
Autism
Mumblefoot (I know he's not a major character lmao but he was Pinestar's first deputy, and had dyspraxia.)
Yellowfang (It's super prevalent in her entire familial line)
Rowanberry
Stumptail
Brokenstar
Littlecloud
Rowanstar
Leafpool
Honestly I'm so autistic I kinda end up putting a little bit of autism in everyone. I feel like I can detect autism in every one of my little favorites. Spottedleaf, Speckletail, Dustpelt, etc
Borderline Personality Disorder
Cinderheart
Breezepelt
Squirrelflight
Etc/There's one cat who has it and I need to add more
Bumble, Blossom, and Briar have a lot of baggage from their parents' treatment, Bumble and Bloss are glass children.
Alderheart has anxiety
Carpwhisker might also have anxiety, she's really bad at standing up for herself
Poppyfrost is severely avoidant
Sparkpelt and Palebird both had postpartum depression
Dovewing has burnout and gets stressed out when her biofamily is around; not sure how to describe this.
Squirrelflight also has ADHD, this is kind of like Autism because I also have ADHD and it's difficult for me to imagine other 'ways' people think. like what do you MEAN, you have ONE train of thought??
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Ok but like. LEO BRO. He’s just/
Ok the amount of spoilers I’m boutta drop for PJO/HOO
I’ve read them like. 3 times now if you haven’t move on go read them you won’t regret it until you spend all ur money on his books-
But like Leo. Dude uses humor & running away as a coping mechanism. Is a fucking SEVENTH WHEEL- like
How
I can’t even imagine
Is now on a boat
But like also
HAD A DRAGOn
HIS BEST FRIEND
For like
NO LENGTHY AMOUNT OF TIME
This POOR MAN
Lost his DRAFON
then built him into a BOAT
He DESIGBED AS A SMALL CHILD
Like BROS A FUCKING GENUOUS
& no one knows
Cause he doesn’t talk to people, he’s so quiet but loud
Like doesn’t voice his concerns or ideas or plans, just teases & lightens the mood & try’s not to take anything seriously
But he finally finds his person
And it’s fucking Calypso
This poor man
Like what the fuck
I know they’re demigods
And their lives are basically “haha get fucked” from the start
But this man went on this quest, was immediately told “lol ur never gonna fit in ur a 7th wheel”
GOT FUCKING POSSESSED & BASICALLY STARTED A FUCKING WAR AND WAS BLAMED FOR IT (like it makes sense but WHY HIM)
And the amt of self-image issues this poor child must have
EVERYONE
POKES
AT
HIS
SIZE
like. Calm tf down
And plus the shit with hazel
AND THE TRAUMA-
HE BLAMES HIMSELF FOR HIS MOTHERS D E A T H
WHICH WAS I N T E N T I ON A L
Iike.
A d if I remember correctly mf dies
Right?
Isn’t he like. The only one of the seven + Nico & Reyna that dies?
Stop targeting hi
And he had the most severe adhd
I RELATE TO HIM TOO MUCH
PAIN
PAIN FOR THIS BOY
ok rant over
I’ll prob continue it later tho tbh
#PJO#HOO#leo valdez#Leo my boy#dude I fucking love Hii#this poor boy#ok ok#READ THESE BOOKS#hero’s of olympus#percy jackon and the olympians#heroes of olympus#hoo spoilers#😭
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HII i saw you doing this for another person so likeee bet (if i can tho <3)
i’m 5’5 with curly-ish hair that falls to my shoulders (i want it to grow out more tho) im a natural brunette (kind of dark) with brown eyes. im also a white hispanic so like yeah
my style is like downtown girl-ish but kind of more edgy? also things with red and hearts in them. I LOVR CLOTHES LIKE THAT BRO but it kind of depends on my mood too. ny go two styles are downtown and baggy clothes tho
i dont wear bold makeup, but i do wear dark to match my looks yk? so normally mascara, light blush, dark lipstick that kind of match my lips but are more redish. i also dont like glittery stuff so😭
i have adhd too so i could talk about everything and anything. i tend to interrupt people a lot which might make me seem like a bitch but i try not to lmao😭 im also very sarcastic. literally sarcasm is my love language fr
im an extroverted introvert. meaning that some days i could be quiet, while others i could be loud sometimes. but i tend to be very loud with friends too lmao. but i dont like loud noises myself which is weird.
on the topic of that, i tend to get overwhelmed easily so i prefer quiet environments. anything with a lot of people/noises will get me overwhelmed n stuff so
im literally a total book nerd. like the fantasy, enemies to lovers, they’d both kill for each other kind of books. im also a realistic hopeless romantic. i tend to destroy my delusions sadly
tbh im very hypocritical and somewhat toxic because of the household i was born in but in trying to change. i stick to what i think and have trouble apologizing and showing affection, so i normally just write “im sorry” or “i ❤️ u” on their skin whenever i cant say it. speaking of that, i also tend to get jealous easily but i never say it because im literally petty asf (but like im saying, im trying to get better <3)
i was born in a harsh environment where my parents argued a lot so if i get yelled at i would cry IMMEDIATELY. i would also get really pissed off.
speaking of me getting pissed off, i cry whenever im angry. i hate it when i do that because i think its weak but ive grown into it yk? it doesnt help that i have anger issues too though
my love languages are physical touch, words of affirmation, and giving gifts. (but also like uhhhhgg physical touch but also like GKDJDHHH PHYSICAL TOUCH yk)
my music taste is kind of unknown. chase atlantic, arctic monkeys, isabel larosa, ari abdul, the weekend, the neighborhood, cigarettes after sex, and lana del rey. thosr are like the ONLY music i listen to LMAO
im not really self confident (but i kinda am? idk (fake it til you make it)) and like i said, an introvert but i wont let you walk all over me or my friends. i have that “treat others how they treat you” mindset. (getting out of my people pleaser phase!!)
i love cats. like i LOVE LOVE cats.
HELP SORDY I WENT ON A LOT SKSJSJ
Reading your desc. made me want to give your the biggest hug🥹🫶🏽
Pairing: Lorenzo Berkshire
Lorenzo Berkshire is Hogwarts’ resident pretty boy. And he definitely knows it.
He likes the attention. Thrives on it really. A magnet for the spotlight.
For the most part you really steer clear of the rowdy group of Slytherin boys. They’re loud, and egotistical, and just not worth the headache.
The first time you run into Enzo is quite literal. You’re agitated enough with the boy as it is, he and his friends had been causing a ruckus in the library for the past hour and you were just done.
You don’t realize that the boy had appeared behind you in the maze of shelves until it’s too late and suddenly you’re in a mess of tangled limbs, sprawled across the floor.
Enzo, of course, is used to girls melting in his hand and naturally tries to charm you, but you’re having none of it, stalking off before he’s able to even get a name.
But boy does he love a challenge.
The next day, he sidles up next to you in the corridor, ramping up the charm as he insists on walking you to your next class.
He’s not at all prepared for the sharp bite of your words. Usually girls are falling over themselves to agree with every little thing he says, but your witty, sarcastic responses catch him off guard.
Everything about you really throws him for a new one. And he’s just so intrigued.
He tries approaching you again in the library, attempting to talk up the novel you're reading. (It goes horribly. After that encounter, you're half convinced he's illiterate.)
But he's just obsessed.
He likes the way that you’re pretty and confident, and yet seem to slip into the shadows, hiding in plain sight. And the way you’re willing to go toe-to-toe with him.
He continues popping up, despite your rather clear initial disinterest. But as you spend more time together, he begins to grow on you slowly, more and more. Like a mold. Or a fungus.
One day, you notice that Enzo is significantly more agitated than normal. Broody and clearly in some type of mood.
You know it’s none of your business, but the library is unusually quiet and you can’t seem to get any reading done- so you bite the bullet and ask what’s bothering the boy.
And boy does it come pouring out. The wreckage that is his home life, the pressure of having eyes on him all the time, the fact that Mattheo and Theodore had somehow managed to flood their dorm.
It was a side of Enzo you'd never seen before. You weren't actually completely convinced that he even had human emotions before this. But it was nice.
He'll later be very shocked that his depressive rant is what somehow won you over. (Trauma Bond™️)
It all spirals from there though. It starts with hesitant fingers brushing each other from across the table, then "friendly" cuddling by the library fireplace, then stolen kisses in the crevices of the corridors.
Enzo loves showering you with love and attention. He has no qualms about planting a warm kiss on your lips in front of a crowd, but is equally content to smother you in the privacy of your own dorm room.
His favorite thing is the way you trace little phrases on the back of his hand or his arm when you don't want to say it out loud and has picked up on doing it himself when he can tell that you're stressed.
You balance each other out in the best way and Enz loves the fact that he has you all to himself.
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Mortius Rediscovery EP thoughts/commentary
(This blog really has absolutely no theme/consistency huh - it's literally just for anything I wanna make posts about that doesn't fit on my sideblog).
Hey y'all! So one of my favourite reactors if not my favourite ever reactor, Mortius, has dropped his first ever EP of original songs, titled Rediscovery, and I thought I'd do a thoughts/commentary of what I think of each song!
I first stumbled upon Mortius from a compilation video of different people reacting to low notes sung by Geoff Castellucci ("Geoffquakes"). He stood out to me (hard not to with a navy blue vest over a hot pink shirt and matching pink tie (affectionate)) and I ended up binging through basically all his Voiceplay/Geoff reaction videos over the course of a few days. I highly related to them as a fellow ADHD queer person with a crush on Geoff Castellucci and I definitely have learned a thing or two about music theory from Mortius's videos as well! (Literally never fully understood the concept of 4/4 time signatures in music until I watched their reaction to This Is Halloween). I also gotta give a BIG credit to Mortius for indirectly introducing me to Epic The Musical - I'd never heard of it until Mortius started posting videos about it, and I got curious and decided to have a look, and the rest is history!
I could ramble more about Mortius's content, and about the duo channel he now has with Casper Fox, "Open Arms Reactions", but I don't want this post being too long if I can avoid it, so let's get into talking about these songs!
Turning Point:
Okay so this commentary for this first song isn't a fully "live first time reaction" because I actually made a reaction video for this! (And no you can't see it - or not without a link anyway). I heard in Mortius's own Discord server (one of the few reactors who lets people join the server without having to join Patreon first) that he would be making a compilation video of people reacting to one specific line in this song, and I was like "aight sure I'll give it a whirl".
"What can I make from the bricks that remain in the rubble you left in my chest?" Freaking fire opening line, and I love the piano intro as well!
"Did you take foundation or just decoration, how much of me really is left?" I mean like c'mon - damn!
Lyrics are sad but damn the beat is a banger and the music itself slaps
Lot of references to stone in this one - bricks, gorgon's curse (turning people to stone), mentions of a future believed to be set in stone. Idk if it's intentional or not but it's interesting! (Also the line "your memory lingers so I'm turning it to stone")
"No giants to stand on" I LOVE the bit of falsetto/head voice Mortius has on the word "giants" - it's wonderful!
"...on the shoulders of a tiny man who thought that I had something he was owed." The switch from singing to speaking on that last word and the delivery of it is second-to-none tbh, but then-
"...even my dog knows what 'no' means" I think I found the line! The one that'll be the basis of the reaction compilation! And that's not even the full line - the full quote makes it even better, but yeah DAMN go off Mortius!
"It'll turn out okay" aw <3
Dreamscape:
(Okay now we go into the more standard blind reaction/running commentary from me!)
Ooh I like the stringed instrument/s being used at the start here!
"I'm gonna rattle the stars, and the world will know me too" I SEE YOU MORTIUS, I SEE YOU! ("rattle the stars" is from a quote from the Disney movie Treasure Planet, which is Mortius' favourite movie of all time). (Speaking of Mortius' favourite things, I still gotta be listening out for Mortius' favourite musical technique thing!)
"I'm just a kid but I'm brighter than I seem" Gifted Kid Mood
Dang this music goes so hard
"The devils on my shoulder say" 'devils' plural! Implying there's two devils and no angel?
"Why are my dreams dictated by my demons?" okay so first a mention of devils, and now a mention of demons. Is this a recurring thing for this song like 'stone' seemingly was for Turning Point or am I wayyy reading too much into this?
OKAY BELTING??? Dang!
Followed quick up by some gorgeous breathy head voice/falsetto I believe? It sounds so light and nice, oh! Mortius you're killing me here (affectionate)
Garden mention just like in Turning Point!
"Celebrate who's here today" aw
"Cause now my dreams aren't muddled by that demon" FAVOURITE MUSIC THING! FAVOURITE MUSIC THING! (It also kinda sorta happens when the song title is sung, I think, but to a lesser extent)
And I just wanna repeat that Mortius is killing it on the vocals - it sounds so good that it's almost easy to forget who I'm listening to (which I mean in the nicest way possible - as in forgetting I'm not just listening to some professional full-time singer, y'know?)
G.O.O.D:
Alright let's finish this off! Surely the song title has gotta be a proper acronym, right?
Okay hello piano notes?
Okay Hamilton vibes???
(Also I was just relistening to VoicePlay's TOP medley with Kurt Hugo Schneider last night and this is low-key reminding me of the Stressed Out part)
"I thought that with this album done, I'd finally feel at ease" oof-
Oh I love this chorus!
And okay it is in fact just "good" spelled out letter by letter and it doesn't actually stand for anything (EDIT: Oh nevermind I'm an idiot I was kinda right the first time; the first four lines of the chorus start with G, O, O, and D! It literally emphasises each letter!)
Not as much to say about this one on my first listen through (also this was typed up at like 7:30AM and I've been up since 6:00AM to film my reaction to Turning Point and I'm tired) but I really love this song and this is so absolutely the vibe for going into 2025 - like goddamn I am learning these lyrics for sure! (Official lyric videos/visualisers will be coming for each song - one a day starting Friday (or Saturday for me, I guess) - but honestly I might have even learned this song by the time its lyric video drops!)
Aw I forgot that I heard Mortius would be doing a spoken-word thing at the end using a snippet from one of his reaction videos! <3
So in summary, 10/10 would relisten again. And if you're reading this and you haven't heard the songs yourself, what are you doing? Go! Search up "Mortius Rediscovery EP" on YouTube! (I'm not sure if the songs are up on Spotify yet but if not then they should be uploading fairly soon).
#mortius#mortius Rediscovery#I typed this up like 9 or more hours ago but I decided to wait till a greater amount of timezones got access to the audio tracks#Mortius if you're reading this hi you're awesome
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@riordanverse-dorphin, tumblr ate your ask. Luckily I get email notifs so did see it. For others, ask was suggesting if the Neptune kids have/are geared towards SzPD, perhaps Percy (and other Poseidon kids) have/are geared towards Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD).
I did actually consider it when I was like hmmm 🤔 what would Percy be more prone to, but, lol, set those thoughts aside because of brain fog ahaha. The "emotional rollercoaster" that often describes the disorder also fits the idea that Poseidon is the emotional moody ocean, while Neptune is the uncaring emotionless sea, which is one of the reasons I had been thinking abt it tbh.
Anyway, see my thoughts below!
The description and diagnostic criteria of BPD through the DSM-5:
Borderline personality disorder is described as a pervasive pattern of instability in interpersonal relationships self-image and emotion as well as marked impulsivity beginning by early adulthood.
It is indicated by the five or more of the following symptoms:
A pattern of unstable relationships
A fear of abandonment, whether real or imagined
Instability and insecurity in self-image
Impulsive high risk behavior such as excessive spending, promiscuity or substance abuse
Suicidal behavior or self-harm
Intense mood swings
Chronic feelings of emptiness or sadness
Anger management issues
Stress related paranoia or loss of contact with reality (aka general dissociation, depersonalization or derealization)
Additionally! Here is how ADHD and BPD overlap.
Image source
So how would Percy fit? Further explanation(s) of how the symptoms may presentation in BPD.
Unstable, intense relationships: ❌
While I think we could consider Percy's relationship with Annabeth to be intense, I don't think he really has unstable relationships. His top three relationships - Grover, his mom, Annabeth - are all fairly stable, imo.
Fear of abandonment: ❓
I think this one is up for interpretation. I can't fully recall any specific scenes where he's terrified of being left by his loved ones. But I personally a) think Poseidon has a fear of abandonment, due to the clinginess of the ocean, and b) Percy so very much loves his inner circle - his mom, Grover, Annabeth - that he's terrified of them ever leaving him. This is kind of seen in TTC when he's worried that Annabeth will leave for the Hunters, as well as his refusal to let her go and choosing to fall into Tartarus with her. But one could think of that as being more romance-oriented so 🤷♂️ That being said, there's also his "no Grover, do not remove the empathy link" thing that you could side-eye as "I need to keep Grover in my life forever and an empathy link is perfect for that". So for me, it's a check. For others, it's up to interpretation.
Poor self-image: ✔
Percy does not think very highly of himself. The earliest obvious display of that I can think of was in TSoM where he was looking at his "perfect" reflection and thinking about how much better that guy looked. Otherwise he does think of himself as a burden to others, or a bad kid. He also thinks of himself as stupid, even when he's noted to be fairly intelligent when it comes to battle. He has a low self-esteem. While he's improved since the start of the series, much of these feelings are still present.
Rapid mood changes: ✔
Percy has been noted for being unpredictable and moody, like his father. Like I said, the intense mood swings symptom was actually the reason I was considering BPD before because where Neptune is the uncaring sea, Poseidon is the emotional one.
Impulsive and dangerous behaviour: ✔
Yes, it's a check, but it also overlaps with other things. The nature of being a demigod is inherently dangerous. ADHD also lends to impulsive behaviours.
Repeated self-harm or suicidal behaviour: ✔
BoO literally has him talking about being suicidal and wanting to die. He also expresses suicidal thoughts in various spots throughout the series. A lot of other people in the fandom have already spoken about this. Additionally, I headcanon him to self-harm frequently.
Persistent feelings of emptiness/sadness: ❓
Question mark because I'm not sure. I think his feelings of emptiness/sadness would more so related to his suicidal feelings or depression. Additionally, what I get from Percy is that his base emotion is anger. And that's something he does his best to repress. Hazel mentions in one of the books that there's a similar sadness between him and Jason though. So, I guess it's up to you. I personally headcanon Percy as struggling with alexithymia, so for me this would be a check. But for others it may be an X.
Anger issues: ✔
I mean do I even need to explain this one?
Temporary paranoid thoughts and/or dissociation: ❌
Doubtful with this one. I think any paranoid thoughts Percy displays in the series are valid within the context of the going-ons in his life. I mostly relate dissociative behaviours with Jason or Frank too. Dissociative behaviours, such as depersonalization or derealization, may occur when I write him but it's really in relation to him being depressed versus a general "out of body" sense as with the other two.
Also, in researching SzPD, quiet BPD came up a bit. Quiet BPD is not separate from classic BPD. The traits are just noted to be directed inwardly rather than outwardly. They will still experience the intense emotional rollercoaster that distinguishes BPD, but they tend to shut their emotions down or push them aside. More so, their sense of self is marked by shame and/or self-hatred.
So, I think where his outbursts of anger and impulsivity are expressed outwardly, the other traits are kept inwards. He doesn't talk much about his emotions to people. Even in BoO, talking to Jason about being suicidal can appear like an intentional choice, because Jason is not someone he is close with. Also they talk about it in the middle of a fucking battle. It might've been something he needed to verbalize without actually talking about.
Also "Favourite Person" is something that notably occurs in BPD, where a person with BPD becomes heavily reliant on a specific person for emotional support, attention, and validation from. They are often highly idealized and tend to be the center of a person with BPD's focus. Percy's clinginess with Annabeth can kind of come across as this.
Hope that helps! And fingers crossed Tumblr doesn't eat anymore of my asks :)
#happy talks pjo#percy jackson#happy's asks#technically. bc tumblr ate the real ask lmao#but anyway i couldn't tag the blog you sent the ask with? but i know that's your main and the riordanverse one is pjo specific so 👍#riordanverse-dorphin#bpd!percy
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I still don’t know if ORV is a gay bl comic or if it isn’t but the fans are homo and therefore the story and characters are made to be as well🤔 and I’m too lazy to read it and find out
I just know that when you search male reader and put a kink on AO3, the first thing to appear are fanfics about ORV…
No you don't get it dude, that's the fun part of ORV, it's so fucking homoerotic you can't tell if it's homoerotic, the entire story is a cockblock of 'will they, won't they'. Like the story itself acknowledges how gay the two main protagonists are. Like they acknowledge each other to be the other's life death companion and damn it if that ain't some wild west 'you'll never meet my mama but I'll gladly go to hell because your lips taste like heaven' type of pining, idk what is.
As you can see I am totally normal about it lol
Granted it's been a while since I read it, I mostly stuck to the manga because the plain text format is difficult for my adhd dyslexic ass to read. But I don't remember there being a whole lot x reader fics of ORV, there WERE a ton of omegaverse kink fics I do remember that lol.
I was writing an ongoing fic for ORV like last year but then the deppresso hit me and even when I made the reader GN but spesified that it would be written from a male perspective I still got half the comments calling the reader she/her and that dampened my mood to continue writing it even more tbh.
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