#well i am typing so i guess im not too far gone

[rowanisawriter]

ok i wrote fic i replay game i read fic i stare at fanart until its burned into my eyeballs what else can i do.What else

[wrongcaitlyn]

okay fuck so i got an anon ask for solangelo fic recs and then i made a draft on my phone but then deleted it bc i wanted to type it out on my computer but then that deleted the ask too so!! hopefully this reaches the anon i apologize deeply for losing your ask😭

but anyway. SOLANGELO FIC RECS. ALWAYS. ANYTIME. I HAVE SO MANY

so first of all if you wanna check out my ao3 i have a bunch of recs in my bookmarks (57 solangelo ones im pretty sure)

but here are some of my favs

i'm put in awe (of something so flawed and free) by CordeliaRose (@cordelia---rose)

archaeologist!Nico & trauma surgeon!Will AU. this fic is. ohmgyod. nico's internal dialogue is just absolutely perfect in this fic and i laughed so hard and god it was just so beautifully written?? but also solangelo are literally so cute. like. ahglskdf. i gotta reread this actually but anyway (also anything by this author, absolutely hilarious, such good writing)

dumb, dumb love by thegoldenappleofdiscord

five times nico and will are dumb and in love, and the one time they are totally 100% dead serious. i love a good outsider's pov, and this fic is just gorgeous. it's a bunch of different perspectives into solangelo, and it's pure fluff, and it's got some of my favorite solangelo quotes (like, when i read fanfic i screenshot parts i rlly like and i practically screenshotted this entire fic), and their characterization is just so so accurate they're so so in love

paris by ethannku (@ethannku)

Nico has a travel YouTube channel. And a crush on one Will Solace. i'm such a sucker for socmed au's and this one is done SO so well. my all time favorite. and it's sequel too!! the formatting i am in awe of, but other than that, it's just a really good time and i just love all the little details. i've reread this too many times to count and was SO excited when a sequel was published, and i can only hope that there's more to the au in the future!! (also this author writes incredible solangelo fics and even more valgrace fics which i recently just bingeread and are soo good)

Perfect Places by buoyantsaturn (@buoyantsaturn)

“My name’s Will,” he started - so far so good - but then continued, “and I guess my favorite food to cook would be, um, frozen pizza.” Was Nico only attracted to idiots? this one's fucking hilarious. i can't even put it to words like their dynamic in this fic is so funny and yet so cute and nico is honestly just like. shocked that will is somehow still alive?? will's a safety hazard. but also piper and jason in this fic are so funny too, it's honestly just such a good, fun read (and, once again, this author's incredible. read everything by them)

I Can't Help It If You Look Like an Angel by the_oncoming_stormaggedon (@lordstormageddidnt)

Will Solace is a pre-med student whose friends run a true crime podcast called "Nothing to See Here". Nico di Angelo, despite not realizing he's a missing person, is the subject of one of the episodes. They meet by chance in a random bar, and shenanigans ensue. i mean, if it's got a taylor swift title, i'm already sold. and then it's part of a series called "Hey Stephen is a solangelo song and i will die on that hill" which is the realest thing ever?? but ASIDE from that, i could honestly rec this entire series (+ the other series it's a part of, "Nothing to See Here" which is all part of the same au) and also everything by this author - it's hilarious, i just love the premise, and the writing is so good!! and hey stephen is a solangelo song, thereby reinforcing my "fearless is will's favorite album ever of all time and i will die on this hill" argument

Even When the Music's Gone by the_oncoming_stormaggedon

It's the 74th Annual Hunger Games, and Nico and Will are the last two tributes alive. haha this is pure angst. just gutwrenching angst. love a good hunger games au and some MCD!

can i handle the seasons of my life? by buoyantsaturn

“I think that most people your age finished high school, and whether they knew what they wanted to do with the rest of their life or not, they went to college. That was their version of ditching everything they knew in order to find themselves. Maybe it’s time for you to stop taking advice from other kids who grew up the same way you did, and take it from someone who used to be normal.”  FAME AU FAME AU FAME AU FAME AU i mean, not REALLY about the fame aspect of it, but i still love it so so much. will's essentially a nepo baby turned not-nepo-baby turned college student and nico's naomi's driver, and there's even... there's EVEN A VERY BRIEFLY IMPLIED POLLEN. yeah they're relationship is just so cute in this and i love the au and i love how it's written and ugh i need more fame au's in my life

so it turns out teachers don't live at school by RegretfullyRegretful (@marbleheavy)

Nico's TA and students are determined to figure out something, anything about him. Of course, it would all just be a lot easier if they asked. Either way, Professor di Angelo is decidedly a lonely hermit. (Someone should really tell his husband and baby that) this was one of the first solangelo fics i ever read, and it's just. so. funny. another outsider's pov bc i love it, and just... the assumptions abt nico, the fluff of solangelo, and then their story of how they got together is so...ahhsdlkjs this author is just a master at tooth-rotting fluff go read everything they write

my lover's the sunlight by demigodbeautiies

Figure Skater Nico di Angelo has a run in with Ice Hockey Player Will Solace. It doesn't go too smoothly, but then again - when does it ever? OLYMPICS AU. FAME(ISH) AU. IM OBSESSED THIS IS WRITTEN SO WELL and like... the very brief part where it feels a lot like a fame au like i just i'm obsessed can you tell. the writing is just beautiful in this, i love nico's internal dialogue, and... i mean, it's an olympics au. ofc its perfect

The Stolen God by TsarinaTorment (@tsarinatorment)

Python is defeated. The prophecies are restored, and Nero has fallen. Apollo has not been seen since. His trials are over; why isn’t he back on Olympus? okay so. this is a bit of a longer fic. and it's a post-toa, pjoxmcga crossover, and it's not *entirely* focused on solangelo - but when i tell you that this fic, if i weren't reading it on ao3, i would truly and full-heartedly believe was a real life published novel - i am NOT LYING. i rec'd this to my friend right after i read it bc i was just like so so obsessed with it and it's literally just. the plot?? is insane. i'm in awe of the author, bc this isn't even the only novel-length fic that they've written with an insane plot too (their fic Eclipse is also phenomenal, but it's more focused on apollo and hades so i didn't rec it here) there's some fierrochase here, lester being lester, and some very very very cute solangelo! and meg! i think sometimes you read a fic and you're like "oh, shit, that could be a novel, and i would think it's better than some actual novels i've read" and this is one of them

(Please Don't Let Me) Fade Alone by TsarinaTorment

Please. Don't let me. the summary's really short here so it's basically that will gets very very very injured and then apollo saves him (rip, i'm sorry, i suck at summaries) once again this isn't necessarily nico focused... it's much more will & apollo. this author writes the absolute best stuff for the apollo cabin, genuinely, if you love will/cabin 7/apollo PLEASE read everything they've ever written but this is just so angsty and the hurt/comfort is so real and goddd it's so good

he was seen on occasion (pacing the rocks, staring out at the midnight sea) by stargirltv

Nico di Angelo is a completely normal eighteen year old. He attends high school, has a socially acceptable amount of friends for a social outcast and has been in a relationship for the past four years with the guy he’s pretty sure he’s going to marry. He also happens to be the world's biggest bedroom pop artist, ‘Hell’s Angel’, with a fan base that will stop at nothing to uncover his true identity and a Father that continually pushes him to be better. His boyfriend freaking out under every single one of his tweets is making it a bit easier for them to figure it out. so. fame au. y'all already know the premise of this is just absolutely hilarious and the interview?? the posts?? will just being will and i absolutely love his characterization?? and the friend group?? this is one of the funniest things ever but also just written so well anddddd yes yes yes it's a fame au POPSTAR NICO RIGHTS except he's not *really* a popstar in this one but like close enough oh AND it's a taylor swift title??? like this fic was made for me basically

okay that was MUCH longer than intended but i hope you enjoy some of the fics on here!! pls let me know if y'all ever want more recs i read literally so many fics - and if you guys ever want to give me any recs, feel free to do so! as of today, i have read *checks fic tracker bc i'm obsessive and need to keep track of everything* about 7.3 million words of fanfic this year. and that's actually less than normal (for me)

also if anyone reads patrochilles please read this fic it's literally been in my head nonstop for the past few weeks since i've read it and it's one of the best things i've ever read and like holyshit if you read patrochilles read it read it read it

[otsukare-katsukare]

Hiii since you said you were interested in what others think about the whole Sami/Bron/MITB situation.... I have thoughts and it's a bit much to write in the comments so, Here goes... (this isn't even all the thoughts BTW 😂

@thesmallworldofsamizayn I got to agree a bit there, with your statement of Bron being unstoppable and Sami being the underdog, as well as getting sick of the comments being made about Sami being the Champ. Usually I don't really give into or pay much attention to all the talk, and if I do, it only makes me want to fight harder, but I'll be honest; this time round, Sami doesn't NEED the belt...

He's good enough on his own and he's proven it time and time again. It was a nice icing on the cake type situation (having the belt), but, the point is that there is and was plenty of delicious cake already there! (if that makes any sense) So bottom line, he'll survive without it, he can survive without it. If anything, it'll probably light a bigger fire under him, reigniting that fiery passion of his. The one that keeps drawing us to him and into his world.

Honestly, this is going to sound so bad, but I won't be overly upset if/when Sami drops the belt (note I too am an avid Sami fan and I'd be a bit sad, but not devastated). To me (personally), before he won the IC championship, and even though he had more loses than wins, he was more intriguing to watch. Idk why, and may be it's just me atm, after that long drawn out (weeksss of) Alpha Academy saga - may be that's what's got me feeling this way fn...

A few weeks ago I would have said that they are building up to Chad winning it, but now that Bron and Sheamus are involved who knows the hands the title will eventually fall into. Also, it's going to be hard to get Sami to drop the belt this quick (even though it's been what? A couple of months now already?) when it clearly (you can SEE it) means so much to him... It'll be hard but they'll eventually have to do it. So may be MITB will be it.

Also got to agree a bit here with @shanie too, I would love to see Sami get involved in the BL saga and if there's anyone who believes in redemption, always seeing the good in people, fighting for the greater good, and what's good and right AND against all odds, it's Sami Zayn. He's got the innate need to rescue people out of toxic situations and to fix said situation. So he would definitely fit the narrative if they decide to insert him into it.

BUT the big issue is with the fans. Again. There's quite certainly going to be a LOT of hate if this happens. I'm already hearing rumblings of people unhappy with just the mere thought of it. Saying he's not family so why is he involving himself in it, as much as that's true, have they completely forgotten that he in fact was a THE 'honorary Uce'? The closest an 'outsider' has ever gotten to the family or being 'family'? Heck he almost became 'Sami Uso'.

So in the end people can and will make up their own minds and there nothing anyone can do about it. And also in the end each to their own I guess... (BTW people need to chill out and remember this is fiction NOT real life 😭)

Anywayy just a few of my thoughts....sorry about the long winded answer 😂😅

(no pressure to to respond to this BTW 😊

🐨

hello! thank you very much for these detailed thoughts. youve actually articulated a lot of what i was feeling. first, the fact that a) i dont like seeing fans bitch about sami and b) i especially dont like it when they're kind of right. it is someone else's turn, and maybe yeah that person should have been chad. i was more than ready for it to be chad at catc personally. im not too mad that it's gone in a different direction cause it does actually look like they have other storyline ideas for chad now, but as far as sami's concerned, yeah the belt isn't doing anything more for him now than it has till this point. it's weird to think he hasn't held a title as a face since the nxt championship 10 years ago. but thinking back on that, and everything since, everything he's been so good at - yeah, im not sure that long term champion is the right look on him! he won it in 2014 and lost it devastatingly to kevin 2 months later, and i would not have wanted that to happen any other way.

thing is, i will be sad if sami loses to bron at mitb. especially if he loses clean, not unlike he did to kevin all those years ago, futilely continuing to kick out long after he should have quit until he's physically incapable of doing so. what's maybe harder to explain as a wrestling fan is that i want to be sad about sami zayn. i like those heavy emotions, i like feeling like my favourite character can't catch a break. that's the entire essence of the underdog appeal. further to that, this is kind of the state im most used to and therefore most comfortable in when it comes to characters im invested in. in the words of mitski, i bet on losing dogs. and sami winning was an incredible feeling and so deserved, but i really don't mind him losing! he's both more compelling overall and gets more interesting stories, and just inspires so much sympathy in that position. (look i also like seeing him in pain i'll say it. he clearly likes acting being in pain just as much so everyone's happy i think)

then there's the bloodline and yeah, i'd sit up to watch sami back with those guys especially roman. im apparently one of the few people who really doesn't want roman to come back as a face no matter how much the fans cheer him, but if he is going to have a face turn, it's got to involve sami god damn it. i was just talking with @milk-crater about this, how it makes more sense with sami being a bit more removed, because that makes him a better person to forgive roman, and to be his moral guide. also it's sami, if anyone in all pro wrestling would reach out a hand to a genuienly remorseful roman reigns it's him. all that and the two just have such great chemistry, and it was the baseline for everything that made the honorary uce arc so fantastic and beloved, and it'd be nice to come back to some of that. maybe show these smarks what they've forgotten about why sami is the absolute best again.

thanks again for hopping in my inbox and never worry about being long winded. anyone who's ever been in a conversation with me knows im the last person to take issue with that!

[alarmsofmyheart]

Jack and Joker: U Steal My Heart

Ep 1

Okay we are beginning with a (probably) failed ocean 8 except it's all gays.

Why am I reminded of Gone with the wind admsnshhsjajana

Enthusiastic taekwondo puppy on screen.

Why does it feel like lunch at my house lmao.

I DO NOT like this brother guy. He has just breathed for four minutes and don't like him.

Somebody please protect this Grandma.

Learn photoshop y'all (yelling at myself)

That hairstyle never fails in making anyone look younger, but it so well suits Yin Anon Wong.

Dreams curbed.

Guys Girls Theys, I get it, I saw so many posts about yearning in war's eyes. I get it. It's just episode one.

Alright I'm leaving this bar. Bye. Byeeee. Love is in the air. Atleast love interest is in the air. I'm leaving.

Not the wooden stool grab behind the counter and checking if anyone else is checking him 😭😭😭😭 That was so cute but Sir you are six feet tall everything you do is visible??!!!

Okay now we are sitting side by side.

The bling ✨ SFX for Jack/Yin's smile was PERFECT.

Jack!!!!! The shoulder grab!!! Oh God.. I get it why Joke is a goner. Acceptance and affirmation for someone who feels invisible and lonely. Wow. Glad Joke met Jack instead of parasocial relationship like me.

(I literally just paused the episode to type it all out, because it's gonna be good. I have never lived react blogged before on Tumblr, this is fun, this is like a pure unedited essay, no mind to mouth filter haha. Feels unreal to myself too. But here I am, instead of deleting this account, live blogging)

:( -> :) in 7 mins episode running time after face to face meeting. IM FINE. THIS IS FINE.

There's lot of inner healing required to accept the acceptance but also, boi is a theif, the unacceptance is blantant.

Wondering how nice their first meet is, how fucked up things are gonna get.

Wow. That is funny now. Run Forrest, Joker, Run. SFX are so good. Lmao.🤣

Ohno!

Okay that's too much blood. But okay. That was nice.

Girl!! He was not asking you.

Yes boi, go ahead scold him. Now the dark alley is pink alley, sirs stop flirting right now.

Girl, I'm so sorry, I was listening to you, but they werent. I've seen this scene as gif or clip atleast twenty other times but it's funny still.

Hand kerchief to wipe the blood!!!!

No mam. They weren't listening.

Ohmygod 🤣🤣🤣 Joke left, with the Gucci purse.

Ajshsjajjahah Rosè okay

Girl has bodyguards and yet somehow Jack and Joke got all bloody and bothered.

Big as a giant, heart as small as an ant

Well said grandma 🤣🩷

God this puppy is going to get heartbroken a hundred times 💔

The difference between the families UGH. Grandma is sitting by his side, while all the three are looking down on him, that too from staircase. DAMN. The lighting too! It was warm and orangy at Jack's and it's all cold and blue at Joke's.

Their optimism and pessimism of Jack and Joker is directly a result of the so far shown families dynamics but lets see.

Not the heist getting interrupted for coffee order 🤣🤣🤣

Oh the loan person better not be Jack.

Ah it's him. So that's how its gonna get fucked up.

Joke, your heart eyes Sir.

That's definitely no how banks work, but I'll just see.

No. No. No.

Oh no don't return the kerchief dear.

Ahsbsjsjshab He called him P'Joke.

Wow he disappeared again. The windswept SFX. It's gonna be one difficult love story. The bgms are good. I'm reminded of the first two-three episodes of Word Of Honor, not able to guess how and when WKX will show up. But here, it's Joke disappearing, trying to untangle, un-associate, running away.

So, Jack is gonna get arrested. Okay that's how he got arrested.

God War!!! War!! His face! Joke is regretting it all.

Grandma being sure that Jack didn't do it and it's striking opposite of Joke's family.

Wow. Joke bowed on his knees!!!!!!! This is not what I expected that too in ep 1. He is confessing it all. War the actor you are!

Alexa play I robbed a bank by Nerd Connection

Fuck!!! So that's how he got arrested. Okay.

Yin!! the actor you are!!!

What was that ring?

Wait what was that???? Omg?

Okay so that made him confess. And that made him a theif.

What an episode. It took me 1.5 hours to watch it.

[bwobgames]

Previous First

"Coffee, finally"

"Man, I can't believe it's over"

"That's understandable, we basically spent the whole night on panic mode"

"I know! And now we are supposed to go back and worry about normal stuff?

This is like when I was a kid and thought quicksand would be a big problem in my day to day life

What do you mean I don't have to think about time resetting maniacs anymore??"

"I mean, who would believe it?"

"That's true.

All of us are going to trauma bond so much"

"I can see that.

I'm glad we got friends out of it, at least.

That's how difficult it is to make friends as an adult, you need at least one stabbing for a dnd group"

"Been there, been there"

The house explodes again, the bomb squad is waiting on firefighters and the police.

The body was found and covered

They all agreed it was an attempted mass murder gone wrong

"... So, how do you feel?"

"Like a very used rope that will snap at the lightest weight"

"I feel like my skin is not as resistant as it used to be, like whatever happened took parts of me that I'll never get back"

"...Yeah, I understand"

"Not to be pessimistic, but part of me feels like I will never leave this place

Even though it's destroyed, even if they tear it down and build a starbucks on top

I think I'll still be here

A ghost of me"

Oliver Beebo recently started believing in ghosts

The supernatural and psychological type

"My dreams are going to get so weird now"

"Hey, I told you, didn't I? I have great contacts in the mental health department"

"Is that why you're so put together still?"

"I am nowhere near put together, I'm just great at acting like I do"

"I think someone called it masking?"

"Comes with the job"

"I'm sure"

Marigold approaches

"Hello! I wanted you two to know that we will take care of everything legal, but we do need you to testify, so if I could have your numbers for further contact?"

"Oh, of course"

"Also, the now renamed family Iraola cordially invites you to any and all holidays and game nights"

"Oh, nice! Does this involve card games?"

"If you ask Owen, he will immediately challenge you to some kind of battle on his multiple card game sets"

"I will bring only my best for such opponent"

"Uh, miss Marigold Iraola?"

"Yes?"

"When should we concrete the legal agreement to pass you the company?"

".... What?"

"You are the one who should have it. It's only fair"

He gives Oliver a look

"... really? But you used so much money!"

"Well, I wouldn't mind a, let's say, monetary compensation for my efforts both here and there"

"I don't think 'efforts' is the right word for your work at the company, Nadia would throttle you for saying that"

"Did it go broke."

"Uh. I don't know"

"...Alright, that's fine. I'll fix it and get you two with psychological compensation, medical compensation, and, well, compensation for the detective work"

"I have been in worse situations and been paid 20 dollars. This is the best thing that could happen to my wallet"

They interchange phone numbers and are put on the "Clock haters" groupchat

Vivi immediately floods his phone with cat memes

He answers with a thumbs up emoji

"... I feel like I should do something"

"It better not be stand up. Your ankle is lumpy and weird"

"No, no. I mean...

When I was at the other house, I promised to let a bit of beard grow, to, yknow, commemorate my survival, I guess.

Maybe I should let my hair grow? Would it look to unkept?"

"If you let someone else cut it, then you could look fine"

"But my money"

"I'll get it for you, im curious too.

Although, now we have these huge gashes on our faces, doesn't that count?"

"No, They weren't made intentionally.

...Maybe a tattoo?"

"Oh yeah! That's a good idea! I'll take you to my usual parlor"

"You have tattoos?"

"Yeah, but it's too cold to show you right now"

"Where will you go after this, by the way. Back to the capital?"

"No, I'm going to be too tired in the way there, I'll just stay the night at my hotel"

"Oh... well... y'know..."

"I don't live that far, well, I live in the region center, but that's way closer to here than the capital so, uh..."

"You could, you know, stay over if you want"

"... And do what?"

"Uh, do you like boardgames?"

"I supposed so"

"I really doubt we would have the energy to do anything else more, um, physically taxing"

"That's fair. I'll crash at your place then.

We could go sightseeing after, or just play video games inside"

"Yeah, and cook a nice breakfast, get some groceries maybe"

"Go to a park, get ice cream, play with your cat...

It would be nice, I'd like that.

A life like that"

"Ah, but I'm taking you to my apartment as well. You will meet the real city life, Coast Boy. "

"Oh, you city people with your underground trains and expensive international snacks"

"Haha, just the best for the capital!"

Silence hangs over them

"... I'm still scared"

"Of the future?"

"Yeah.

Will it ever go away?"

"... I don't know, I'll help you though.

I'll get you a planner. You can be like those instagram girls with a very strict planner"

"... Yeah, I guess.

Sorry, my mood is all over the place"

"I don't blame you"

"I mean, I don't even know what am I going to do after this. I'm basically out of a job"

"Well, what are your options?"

"I could go back to crime. Maybe hacking or something with medicaments, that could be fun."

"No, I'll get you"

"I know, but you'll do it lovingly"

"I guess I could go back to do something security related. It's boring, though."

"I heard my local chuck e cheese is hiring security guards"

"I am not applying as a night security guard in a building with animatronics."

"That's oddly specific"

"I still could be your detective assistant, I can use Excel, you know"

"You overestimate how much I'm paid"

"Or I could be literally anything else, but for now, I'll be on vacation"

"Yeah, me too"

"I'm thinking of taking cases of more haunted houses"

"... Are you out of your mind"

"I know how to stop them, and I wouldn't be going blind like these last two. I could even find a way to do it without entering them"

"Please stop risking your life. The detective life is already dangerous enough"

"I'm the house killer, the home terror"

"Sure, sure

Maybe I should be your bodyguard"

"Again, you overestimate how much I can afford"

They drink their drinks in silence

They can't help but feel slight sadness at it all

But time doesn't stop

"Ángel! Ángel look!"

"Huh?"

"The light, the sunrise is starting!"

It is 8:00 am

The sun is coming out

A cold breeze passes through them

The chatter of everyone quiets down

The sun is back

A new day has started

It always will

A collective melancholy passes through all of them

The eternal night is over

What now?

The future is waiting

They are alive

They will live another day

As many as they can

"We'll be alright

Not all of the time, but we will.

I'm going back home, finally

I've lost so much

And gained as well

I'm full of conflicting feelings that my subconscious will have a blast using

I'm scared too

But I'll be brave

Just to see another sunrise like this

With people that I love

We'll be alright

The future is full of chances"

A new day is born

And they watch it together

Hand in hand.

Thanks for playing

[richardsphere]

Leverage Redemption Log: The Jackal Job

Name unlikely to refer to an actual jackal, an animal that is one of the most common aliases for fictional phantom-thief types (probably slightly after "cat" and before "fox" but i dont have any hard data) --- Episode starts, nice old lady is wondering why a man, presumably her son, or one of those court-apointed guardians is stealing her stuff. Fuck its going to be about Elderly Abuse.

As of right now, its not entirely clear as to wether he is an asshole who is exploiting a dementing relative, legitimately trying to take care of her but struggling financially because fuck the economy is just never gonna recover from the multiple financial collapses we've suffered or outright gasslighting her into believing she is suffering dementia. 2/3 options would make him evil and this is leverage so im not holding out hope for him being misunderstood. so like, probably evil with maybe a 2.5% chance of a "he's trying his best and just really shit at showing it". But yeah, this is leverage. He's a baddie, question is just if he's exploiting his mom, or feigning a relation so he can go to the judge and say "she's so far gone, she doesnt recognise her son (who i definitlly am)" --- Episode starts: Breanna is forced to do community service cause she was caught stealing something. (this is our "juror number 6" plot for Breanna.) Take your time, slow down, pay attention to details. Well nice to see Sophie give the crux of this episode away in her first 3 lines of the episode. and she just picked Breanna's pocket. She's an old thief. (wonder if she and Archie ever hung out...) Sophie spots the ring, then the Astonomers by Vermeer and realises instantly that she knows this woman. (also, does the son know that is the genuine Vermeer he's gonna sell, or does he think its one of those gift-store Mona Lisa's? Cause if he doesn't, he's in for the worst deal of a century) --- Alzheimer's... Well guess im going to be feeling a lot less witty writing this log then most. Thats not something i'd like to joke about too much. Ok, Hinkley is not his son, he's a professional guardian. --- just a side-note that we'd better end this episode with at least an alusion to Breanna having hacked whatever servers are tracking her community service, cause she's kind of about to build up a truancy on that stuff. Like i know that "caring for an elderly or disabled person" is the type of stuff that could be court appointed community service, but this was not the task she was court appointed

Sophie is pulling the "im your replacement" card. Jackal picks up quickly. --- Ok the team is all here now, You're being stupid. She's here because she fell in love with the mark, (who is probably but not guaranteed to be her power of attorney). Her last con was a failure or at least not a known success. Looking for the one thing that she stole that was never returned isnt gonna solve anything because she isnt known to have stolen it. --- Ok the little Edie con is working? Basically a violin-sale but Parker is the Violin. Breanna has experience with elderly Alzheimers patients (grandma) We're doing Leverage Crew-ified Flashbacks again... (this is gonna hurt on an emotional level)

Oh i can see where the twist is gonna happen: Josephine was the mark (bars real owner=safe's real owner=safe combination knower)... And Jo, former bar-owner, fled the country alongside her to escape her gangster ex and started a coffee shop in this town. Oops, Breanna just all-but confirmed the first half of my suspicions (which this early in the episode, means im wrong) --- Harry has a little conductors hat amongst his stuff... Oh look at that, he just said the judge gets first pick of his stolen goods... the judge has the gun (and a heck of a scandal it'd be if a judge was found in posession of stolen goods... and a stolen gun belonging to a founding father at that...) Lovely work on the tiny mirror-box (that she definitly hadnt arranged to be there in advance), Elbow bruises. (chances she didnt "donate" the gun cause it was used in the murder of a london gangster named Earl increasing rapidly) --- The painting, find the painting. "prefect never lasts forever"

they had a daughter.

and all was fine until the papertrail caught up to them. (the daughter... She might be our way out) --- get the judge (noted antiques lover) to overhear that the Turlington Pistol was amongst her posessions, divide and conquer. the money was in the car. (i was a bit suspicious when Jo said "its got a couple hundred worth of tips" when they were running away. But i justified it as her being too good a citisen to steal from Earl) --- Tip for showrunners: If you want to start a comercial block on a cliffhanger, dont have it be an attempted murder of our still-alive narrator. It sort of undermines the tense suspension.

so she shot earl (unsuprising.) Back in the modern day we're headed for a warehouse and Jackal is lifts the gun so we can frame Sophie for stealing the gun so they can steal a fake back from Sophie.

Ok not so much a fake (they didnt have time to prep one) as just placing a made in china sticker on the real and genuine article. (amazingly simple act of brilliance)

Parker's reputation is worth its weight in gold. (a personal favour from someone who started this season by stealing 8 Rembrandts in a single night in multiple museums across the entire United States, is worth a lot compared to a contract with a small-time purveyor of stolen goods. Whodathunk?)

Oh they did pull an entire switch with the gun. (honestly, after the little Made In China sticker reveal, the fact they pulled a genuine switch with a store-bought replica instead of a simple sticker-sleight-of-hand is suddenly quite disapointing, especially as we know the fence was on their side anyways.)

Im going to be honest and say that the Jo acress doesnt have the most convincing elderly wig. (also they kept the plushie) ---

[the-kipsabian]

for the fanfic asks: 1, 8, 13, 20, 23, 25, 29, 43, 46, 72, 79 💚

1. Do you daydream a lot before you write, or go for it as soon as the ideas strike? most fics come to me in forms of dreaming while im trying to sleep, so yes. the one good thing about insomnia currently is that i get to rotate so many blorbos and scenarios in my head that i have a lot of content to write lol

8. Post an out-of-context spoiler from a wip. i have like. one current wip in docs that i might work on again at some point so here. technically its not a spoiler since its the whole premise of the fic buuuut

13. Do you listen to music while you write?  If yes, what have you been listening to recently? pretty much always? i focus better when i have matching vibes, unless im having a sensory moment but usually then i cant really write either honestly. "puppet master" is my current playlist on loop, its just my two kip playlists combined into one to fit the mood of immortal fears lol

20. Do you prefer writing AUs or canon fics? pretty much all my stuff in canon divergent on some level honestly, so i guess aus? not in a very obvious sense of aus but yeah. tho i do love me some extra sad aus too, post apocalyptic aus my beloved.....

23. Is writing the beginning, middle, or end of the story easiest? Hardest? middle part is the easiest, ending is the hardest cause i either never know when to end a story or how to end a story like. i want to have that final impact and sometimes its so hard to pinpoint where that should be. middle is just a good flow usually if i get that far and thats where all the good ideas usually happen so its my favorite <3

25. What’s your favorite part of the writing process (worldbuilding, brainstorming/outlining, writing, editing, etc)? probably the writing itself. like i can have a shit ton of good, even great ideas while brainstorming or outlining things, but usually the biggest things happen while im actually putting the words down. i really enjoy it when the story just flows and how it comes together. also i have discovered i absolutely loathe the editing part LOL

29. What’s something about your writing that you’re proud of? personally i think i can bring emotions to life really well. be it happy or sad (mostly sad tho i love my sad depressed uncomfortable bitches), i feel like i have the words for them that fit

43. Is there a trope or idea that you’d really like to write but haven’t yet? hmmmmm i dont really know? i mean i have plenty of ideas sitting in my drafts and in my brain and stuff, but i dont really think i have a lot that i absolutely NEED to write. maybe that one bunnelope fic i wanted to do about a love potion gone wrong cause girls need to be gay or something

46. If you could only write one type of AU for the rest of your life, what would it be? once again - post apocalyptic au my beloved. anything that takes place "after the world ends" in one way or another is my shit. gimme all the post apocalyptic hell i crave for

72. What’s your favorite writing compliment you’ve gotten? basically every time someone says i nailed a character im writing for the first time. cause i take a lot of pride and put in the effort to try to give them each their own voice and i study my materials and yeah. ..hence also why im so hesitant so often to write about new people cause i am a perfectionist when it comes to characterization especially ajksdnkjasd

79. Do you have any writing advice you want to share? this we discovered last week to be a really functional advice so: if you dont know how to start writing a scene, put someone in a room. make them enter a space, and start from there - why are they there, who else is there, what is their purpose in that space, what is that space?

also first drafts dont need to be perfect, everything can be edited in post, even after you post the thing if youre planning on doing so. hell some published novels have typos in them, let alone nonsensical writing and storylines. you dont need to be perfect, as long as you are writing

and obviously you are your own audience first and foremost. write for yourself yo fuck the rest (unless the rest are into it too then thats great but you should still write for yourself first and consider everything else second lol)

fanfic writing asks ~

[chelleztjs18]

Hello you mrs. honey nut cheerio lady robin hood who likes christmas but is allergic to the pine tree lefty eyebag 😌

I fell asleep but then woke up, saw your answers and fell back asleep 😅 I was going to respond but I couldn't keep my eyes open and I would have probably typed some gibberish.

Hope you slept well. Doing anything fun today? Or just finishing up little stuff before you guys leave for the airport?

So when you do that, does it ever creep your customers out when you guess their order correctly? Also, the thing about guessing the voices from animation or movies, that's amazing. I could never even guess or be close to who it is if I did guess.

I'm the same way with names and numbers. I try to guess the name and it's always far off 😅 then numbers always get jumbled.

Ah I see. What's the most words you have written in just an hour? Also, have you ever finished writing a fic then reread it after and scrap the whole thing?

I'm the same way with reading fics with a lot of kinks. I think I just read the fic, but then once I see something disturbing to me, I stop. I try to push myself to see if I can handle reading it, but then it actually weirds me out so I can't continue 😅

I think my answer is the same as yours. Especially the bdsm with pain, or if it has blood and other bodily functions..no no for me. And is pet play like beastiality? Sorry I don't think I know that.

I did not expect the naenae song 🤣 do you do the dance too?? Hahaha

For me:

1. Dynamite by BTS

2. Secret Love Song by Little Mix

3. Any country songs lol

Name 3 songs that remind you of your crush.

- CuriousGeorge

Hello hello youngins righty eyebag! 😅

I wanna see what kind of giberish u type if u reply mr when u r sleepy.lol.

How r u? N how was ur day? R u feeling better emotionally?

I didnt sleep well last night. Stayed up until like past 2.am. i got a little panic attack becausr i overthought if i forget something or if i pack too much.

We got to the hotel around 4pm. N im just chillin now.

The hotel is nice.. was thinking to sleep early tonight because we gotta wake up at 4am to go to the airport but the room has a separated room like a living room with desk n chair with tv also, so it is so tempting to stay up late n write. 😅 but i think i should sleep early..but im not sure.lol.

Haha no. They actually love it.. but i did kinda shocked one customer though because i started the talk in a wrong way but then she laughed about it. It was when i was in new orleans walk at night n i was kinda drunk. N i recognize too. N my drunk ass talked to her n say "excuse me, u live in ...(city name) right?" 😅

N her drunk face was like "wtf" n she said yeah.. n i was like "oh no dont worry, im sorry..i work at (sushi restaurant name) n i serve ur table pretty often." Then i start mention her regular orders n then she recognize me.🤣🤣🤣 n she laughed. Then we walked the bourbon street together drunk. 🤣

About recognize actors / actress voice in animation movie, sometimes i got it right sometimes i dont.😅🤣

Yeah numbers n names r hard to remember.

I never pay attention how much i write in an hour. Mostly 1 fic i wrote at least between 4-6K words but the most in one fic i think it's like 12K but i end up splitting them to few parts. If The Monsters Within a whole one fic it will be the longest i hv written because over 18K words n still counting. 😊

Yeah i have done that, but not scraping the wholr thing though, i scrapped almost half of it.. one time i wrote quite a lot, ideas flowed n stuff..i wrote it on google doc n it was on offline mode because i was on a flight. But when i finally connect it to internet, the part that wrote was not saved n gone.. i wanted to cry. I think it was the dark wanda fic "I Love You Too Much" i dont know if u have read that but yeah i had to write all over again.

Haha yeah im like that too. It was an age play fic, i tried to be open minded about it but i stopped in the middle because i couldnt read it.

Petplay is a kink where one of them act like a pet such as puppy,or kitten or bunny. I dont mind reading light pet play but not too much. Im not good at explaining this but i guess u can google it. 😊

Haha yeah sometimes i do the nae nae song but only when im drunk. 😅 im not a good dancer n too shy for that. But when im drunk im a different person.😅🤣

Ah okay.. i will check those songs.. u dont like country song? I think pop country r very nice to listen to, for me. 😊

Song that reminds me of H? Hmm...

1. Gorgeous by Ash (the one that inspired me smut idea with Natasha. 😊

2. Con La Brisa by Foudeqush

3. Gooey Rework by Glass Animals. 😁

What about u?

Also i think u asked something about pt. 4. I dont remember if i have answered it or not. Can u remind me again? Im too lazy to scroll to my answers right now. Sorry. 😁😆

Next question?

Cheerio! (Not the cereal one)

[13leaguestories]

okey, stay calm, STAY CALM. soooo, I just see a post in which you say there will be and update of S1 and S2 of Superstition and you have no idea how happy it makes me. Superstition was my first WIP a ever read, and I am quite very found of it, if I say you I have like three plays with different MC (and I had in mind to make another with rivalmance with Chris so I guess I will wait for the updates to start again all) I wouldn't be exaggerating.

Maybe I kinda sound like a fanboy, cause I am, but really, thanks for working so hard and tell a story so beautiful, well built and that is capable of transmitting so many things in such way, really.

Personally I really love Chris, the way he interact with his environment and process all the shit is happening... I have a question (I never do it, but it make me curious) if you decide to make Chris to take the bus, will you ever see him again? In my head I always thought if Chris take that bus, the bad guys will have more chances to kill him, so I imagine a scenario where MC finds out about the death of his best friend and: lets process to cry :(

Oh, before I forget it, is S2 you have a sex scene with Zillah, I see a post in which you say Zillah can be bottom if you rival him? I say it because (I think I really am obsessed with this story lol) I play both ways (rival him and not) and in both ways he is top if remember correctly (just curiosity)

Okey, I think this post is way to large, im sorry for all this babbling, but really, im so happy to see this fantastic story is not forgotten.

PS: S3 will be in itch too? Or will be only published in Patreon? Thank you for your attention! I hope you have a great day/night or whatever!! <3333

Thank you, I am feeling the love today guys! DAMN! GOOD VIBES! GOOD VIBES! lmfao.

But um, seriously, thank you so much for the kind words. If you send Chris away you will never see him again, nor talk to him. Mostly because he starts a new life with a new name and everything. At best, maybe Roe will one day reap that soul, but no, he's gone. One can argue for and against sending Chris away and neither side is right. It's basically your personal morals and thoughts on him and the situation.

Zillah's sex scene in S2 is mostly just dominant fighting, I can't really recall all of it. But future scenes will most definitely have you being able to dominate him. But you will have to rival because the friend one, Zillah is just naturally far more assertive and dominating.

Superstition S3 will be on itch.io. Same price (no price) and same download type or ability to just play immediately from the page.

[yoshkeii]

"𝚂𝚎𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚊𝚝𝚎."

࿐ character(s): Daishou Suguru, Atsumu Miya, Sakusa Kiyoomi

࿐ genre: angst (to fluff)

࿐ type: headcanons (hcs)

࿐ requested: yes, as a continuation of  "𝚄𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚙𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚎𝚍.”

⌦ male!reader (he/him)

⌦ mentions ; cheating (atsumu’s), angst to fluff (sakusa)

⌦ they all have different scenarios, so its best to check out the first post for a little more context.

A/N: never expected to make a part two, but i guess the feedback said otherwise. its been awhile since ive written anything, so i may be rusty, disregard mistakes too please-

𝙽𝙾𝚃𝙴 ; this is queued. i am still on my hiatus.

𝙳𝚊𝚒𝚜𝚑𝚘𝚞:

→ ever since the argument, you had left. taking majority of what was yours and what you could in the quickest of matters. you and Daishou barely talked or interact within those days. often dead silence within the shared home... or rather what was shared.

→ it was quite suffocating as well, leaving each other after a long relationship you both committed to. but you had a gut feeling it would end unfortunately.

→ Daishou had seen you leave for the last time past the front door. only exchanging a blunt “bye.” before disappearing behind the solid door. he really hoped this was all lies and games, but it wasn’t. he knew this was real, he knew this will be his reality. without you. the fading steps signaled that you were not gonna look back.

→ since then, he hasn’t heard of you since. he hasn’t seen your name around social media and only the bittersweet memories of when his friends would bring you up came into mind.

→ but it was like, you erased him from your world. and yet Daishou still held tight of the cut thread that lead to you. the other end laying flat onto the floor as the other end you had, disappeared as a whole. a huge gap between you both.

→ him being in denial, he kept mainly to himself. 

→ the old shared space felt empty. drastically different every time he would come home. he would hear your welcoming voice that made his whole body so warm and fuzzy, but now, the silence was painful and cold as he stepped inside his so called ‘home’. he didn’t know why...

→ but he really wanted you back. he wanted to see your face no matter when he came home. he missed your whole presence. he yearned for something that he could’ve kept if he would just shut up.

→ Daishou didn’t expect to see you here. at the same party he would be invited to, he watched you from the second floor that had the view of the merged rooms of the living room and kitchen. seeing you laugh and smile with two other friends who you stumbled upon, the sight made his heart sting.

→ a sharp stab straight through his chest, only thinking if he could be the reason for that smile. that laughter. oh he envied it.

→ he tried to avert his thoughts away before he heard some whistles and calling of names, to see your figure slip away with someone else from the crowd.

→ watching you both from his higher position, he noticed your hands intertwined with the other. his own hand slightly clenching the daring drink he held, the other grasping the rail tighter the longer he watched.

→ Daishou’s eyes soon looked up at your face. the expression you had made him feel conflicted.

→ the wide pure smile you had accompanied with the deep flush, made him feel that oh so familiar feeling. but knowing he wasn’t the cause of it pained him.

→ although, seeing you with someone deserving made him feel at ease. but the stabbing dagger in his heart laid there still, only reminding him that he could’ve been that better person.

𝙰𝚝𝚜𝚞𝚖𝚞:

→ after the confrontation, you and Atsumu had split ways of course. it was difficult to move on and realize the situation at hand, to the both of you.

→ seeing where your stuff would be gone in the shared space made it surprisingly empty and less... alive. the whole place felt dead and empty, like a home left abruptly without an obvious reason of why.

→ but Atsumu knew why, and it began to nag at him. it made him feel so guilty to do that to you. to him, you were so pure, kind, and oh so nice. he could go on about your looks too, he really could. but every thought of you made his mind so hazy and clouded with distraught. 

→ why did he cheat? you were loyal to him- if only he could be too.

→ its been a couple years since then, it was tough for Atsumu. he had cut ties for who he was cheating with, regretting what he did and in hopes to regain you back before- didn’t obviously work. so now he stayed alone in the home that practically mocked him of his decision. 

→ he was quite surprised Atsumu wasn’t blocked by you throughout social media etc. but he didn’t dare to strike a conversation and laid idle as he saw you occasionally appear on his feed. 

→ seeing you mention being in relationship but only giving vague hints and images, truly never revealing who to your followers. 

→ sighing as he slipped his phone into his pocket, he didn’t want to think about it all, so he decided to pay a visit to Osamu at his restaurant. to his twin’s dismay.

→ arriving there fairly quickly he waved at his brother who was behind the counter cleaning up for the night, seeing his twin wave back slightly before continuing on whatever he was doing.

→ Atsumu couldn’t help but noticed the metallic object that wrapped around Osamu’s ring finger. 

→ “..’Samu? What’s on yer’ hand?”

→ “Oh- ya noticed already. I got engaged not so long ago, or recently.”

→ curiosity jabbing at the blonde made him eagerly question again.

→ “I- What?? By who!? ‘Samu ya didn’t even tell me you were in a relationship!” Atsumu could only just whine, knowing his brother didn’t share with him about his personal life after highschool. 

→ “Shut up ‘Tsumu.. Don’t be so loud in my restaurant or I’ll kick yer ass out of here!”

→ “..but do you still wanna know?”

→ Osamu seeing his twin nod with anticipation made him sigh, knowing this wouldn’t end too well. “Well.. me and [Name] are getting married. Just got engaged with him two days ago.”

→ “..[Name]..?” Atsumu could only repeat the familiar name, his voice faint but still audible to his brother’s ears.

→ he couldn’t believe it. his brother... and.. 

→ “W-well-! That’s.. nice for both of ya, haha..” the blonde tried to played off, hoping that the wavering of his voice didn’t catch his attention but, Osamu already knew, simply playing along as the conversation continued and slowly shifted off to something else.

→ Atsumu had left the place rather quickly than he originally intended to stay- but he didn’t expect it. he didn’t expect you being engaged with his twin, eventually knowing you’ll see each other soon.

→ he didn’t know how to feel about this. he was happy for both of you- but- he wasn’t over you. although it has been more than two years, he wasn’t. he missed you, he yearned to see you again. he wanted to hear your laughter and giggles, your voice overall. he wanted to see you smile, he wanted to see your handsome face. 

→  he wanted... you back. but he knows he can’t have you. not anymore.

𝚂𝚊𝚔𝚞𝚜𝚊:

→ when you left passed the front door, you hadn’t come back after a few minutes. and it was.. raining. pretty badly.

→ having worry built up in his stomach that soon turned into a mixture of anxiety made him feel uneasy, overthinking the situation and words he said to you earlier made him choke on his actions. 

→ snapping out of the trance, he rushed to go grab a coat to slip on. retrieving his phone. hurrying out the front door hoping to find you haven’t gotten too far already, almost slipping down some steps of the apartment building on the way to find you.

→ the rushing anxiety continue to flow through him, making his movements more loose and clumsy as he ran off to find you. calling out your name aimlessly of the darkened rainy streets. not caring that his curls were getting soaked in the pounding rain, he just wanted to find you. 

→ to find you and keep you safe.

→ Sakusa’s heart kept increasing every moment he didn’t see you. he wanted to find you so bad- this anxiety he had was much worse than when around he was in crowds, this one felt more instinctual.

→ forgetting he had brought his phone, he slipped it out of his pocket quickly dialing and calling you. to find you answering on the second ring.

→ “..h-hello-?”

→ “[Name]..! T-thank god your safe.”

→ the slight mess-up Sakusa slurred with his words made you feel slightly worried, “..yes I am safe. what’s up with you??”

→ “Nothing..! But w-where are you?”

→ “I’m.. at a nearby cafe. Are you sure you-”

→ your boyfriend interrupted you quickly, “I’m on my way.”

→ “H-hey..! Don’t just-”, hearing the call end with singular beep, “aaaand.. he hung up..” you decided to look around from your position outside, grasping your phone nervously. realizing the rain was pounding down much harder than earlier.

→ the sound of the familiar voice calling your name from the distance caught your attention, gazing over to see Sakusa running over towards you. 

→ “S-saku-”

→ jumping lightly at the sudden hug he enveloped you, muttering soft rushed apologies over and over again as he hid his drenched face in the crook of your neck. he had continued his rambles of apologies as you hugged him back, rubbing his back lightly. watching the ravened hair male let it out a little longer before you could mutter reassuring words to him back.

→ the tension slowly rising from his muscles but the hold of his hug didn’t falter at all, only continuing to snake around your waist.

→ “..you scared me..” “...im really sorry, babe.”

→ you lifted your gaze to meet Sakusa’s, lifting your hands up to cup his face. brushing a few strands of hair away from his view sending a quick peck onto his lips. “you don’t need to apologize anymore Omi. you did enough already..”

→ “A-and you’re drenched! Baby, you’re gonna get sick-” you blinked, noticing how flat his hair was from the rain that couldn’t reach you both from the small roof over the entrance of the cafe. 

→ “..i-i’ll be fine..” the soft stutter Sakusa made noted he was embarrassed about the thought, “..i’m glad your the one not gonna be sick though.” he muttered before softly pecking your lips.

→ “Honey..” you sighed, taking your hands in his before heading inside the building. “..lets just get something to drink to warm us up, ‘kay? then we can head back.”

→ “I-m.. paying aren’t I-..”

→ “Yes. Yes you are. A treat after a bad tiring day!”

→ “..you just want sweets-”

→ “Shut it Kiyoomi.”

[ootahime]

what is utahime’s role in the future? — a prediction (manga spoilers)

part 1 (unedited)

I WAS ABOUT TO POST IT BUT I ACCIDENTALLY DELETED IT AND I WAS SO HURT FR!!!!! I HAD REWRITE THIS ENTIRE THING </33

part 2 is here!

in this post, i will be analyzing the information we’ve been given about utahime so far to form a prediction about her future role in the jujutsu kaisen series. if you’re as interested in utahime’s character as i am, please feel free to keep reading :3 (i’ll also be talking about her relationship with gojo a bit too)

soukatsu_ on twt!

kaikaikitan on twt!

utahime iori is a semi-grade 1 sorcerer working as a student supervisor/teacher at kyoto jujutsu high school. she loves drinking beer and going to karaoke. she’s also close friends with shoko and she’s not particularly fond of gojo most of the time. what else do we know about her?

hates sweets (funny she’s the complete opposite of gojo)

she’s great at singing and it’s a huge part of her technique

squabbling with gojo became a reflex :3

everyone absolutely adores utahime

loves watching soccer and baseball

a terrible drunk (worse than naobito zenin)

gojo is her main source of stress

let’s dive into her personality and abilities!

chapter 65

before i get into it, i think it’d be best if i were to explain the timeline because a lot of people seem to be confused about this one particular thing. utahime is born on february 18th, 1987. contrary to popular belief, she is not 3 years older than gojo. it is november 2018 in the story because gojo was sealed on halloween. if gojo was born on december 7th, 1989, that would mean that right now, he is only 28 years old. he has yet to turn 29.

the year is 2007. gojo satoru is a second year at tokyo jujutsu high school. the japanese school year begins in april which suggests that gojo is only 17 at the time (even if it’s not april, it doesn’t look like winter yet so it’s unlikely that he’s already 18). utahime is 20 because it is past february. she is a 2nd grade sorcerer at the age of 20. that’s not bad at all!

chapter 65 introduces young utahime and mei on a mission together within a cursed site. in real time, they’ve been gone for two days which is a cause of concern for gojo, shoko, and geto because the two haven’t contacted anyone since the beginning of their mission.  the two begin to suspect something is wrong because the hallway markers they’ve set in place disappeared, and no matter how far they travel within the halls, the end is nowhere in sight.  mei theorizes that the cursed spirit is overlapping the space as they travel forward.  utahime agrees with this speculation and proposes a plan to escape the cursed spirit’s grasp by moving erratically.  notice how she says that if one of them should escape, they can try to attack from the outside or call for help.  if utahime was not capable of inflicting damage on anything then she would have told mei to escape and attack if she can while she waited to be rescued.  however, she didn’t.  she included herself in the sentence which leads me to believe that she is capable of going on the offense if needed.  

keep in mind that at this point in time, mei is a grade 1 sorcerer.  she is knowledgeable about all things involving jujutsu because she is experienced and skillful.  we can see this aspect of her character illustrated when she theorizes that the cursed spirit is messing with the space they’re in.  she chooses to go with utahime’s plan because she agrees that it’s the best action moving forward.  this verifies that utahime is an intelligent girl that’s able to get along with pretty much anyone.  

her intellect is demonstrated once again in chapter 79.  she was able to deduce the possibility of there being more than one traitor and the fact that one is probably a higher up.  she also narrowed down the mechamaru as the mole of kyoto not because he was acting suspicious but by process of elimination.  she thought thoroughly of his technique and how easy it would be for him to manipulate devices small enough to be undetectable.  

sure you can argue that she should already know all her students’ abilities and whatnot but you have to admit that it’s hard trying to sniff out the traitor when no one is acting suspicious.  in addition to that, how did she know that there was a traitor in the top brass?  i would have never guessed that tbh LOL (maybe bc im an idiot).

okay, now that we have established that she’s intelligent, let’s answer a more important question.  is utahime weak?

chapter 33

if gojo calls utahime weak, does that mean there is some truth to it?  well it is true that she is weaker than him because he’s the strongest and all.  in my opinion, he’s just teasing her.  he probably found that calling her weak is what really riles her up.  maybe i’ll talk about why he loves teasing her so much in a later post.  but anyway, gojo calls everybody and their mom weak.  he even said jogo was weak and we know how powerful that guy is.  gojo’s words alone do not indicate much about utahime’s power.  in fact, i don’t even think he has seen her use her technique yet.  he’s probably only ever heard of how it works.  this is what i think their conversation about her technique was like:

gojo: hm?  ur cursed technique is singing?  can u show me?

utahime: what!  no way!  

gojo: why not?

*one of the classmates tells him that she can only use her CT once in a while because it consumes a lot of energy*

gojo: hahaha!  u have to conserve cursed energy to use ur CT?  why are u so weak, utahime?

utahime: i!  am!  your!  senpai!  respect!  me!

what i’m trying to say is that gojo loves poking fun of people.  we should not believe him when he calls someone weak because compared to him, everyone is weak.  

this is a little off topic but let’s examine him telling her, “and you don’t have the nerves, utahime.”  i think he’s trying to say that there’s no way she’ll ever do something like that because she’s not the type to put her students in danger.  remember the soft expression and relieved smile on her lips when she said that she was glad the students were safe after the kyoto incident?  gojo was directly in front of her so not only did he hear her say that, but he could have seen the look on her face too.  even if he told her that she didn’t have the guts to betray the school to get on her nerves, he knew that utahime simply cared too much about the students so he ruled her out as a suspect right away.  this is why he ultimately decided to confide in her and ask her to help him.  

i’m a person who loves over-analyzing things.  i really enjoy the dynamic between gojo and utahime.  they’ve known each other for more than 11 years and although they always bicker, there is an unspoken feeling of trust between the two.  gojo can do anything and everything by himself because he is truly the strongest person alive, but he still knows when to rely on others.  him deciding to entrust utahime with such a job implies that he believes in utahime’s abilities.

chapter 52

she’s not using any cursed energy here--not to our knowledge at least.  this is just pure skill.  she was able to swiftly evade the swing from haruta.  he was surprised himself considering the fact that he was right behind her.  how do we know her CT isn’t speed?  after haruta swung at her, we can see that some of her hair got cut off.  if she was using her CT then speed should be her specialty.  she should have been able to completely avoid the attack altogether but she didn’t.  of course this isn’t a wow moment because jujutsu sorcerers should know how to dodge attacks, however, i’m just trying to get the point across that she’s not a defenseless person without her technique or others.  let’s not forget that semi-grade 1 isn’t a weak rank either.  you can’t simply be recommended to be a grade 1 sorcerer if you only can support others.  

chapter 48

i want to bring up this panel. it suggests that utahime and takuma are sorcerers who have not experienced black flash and therefore, do not understand the essence of cursed energy as well as those who have like gojo and nanami.  i find it strange how takuma and utahime were used to represent sorcerers who haven’t experienced it yet.  is the purpose to demonstrate that there is a clear difference in skill between adult sorcerers like utahime and takuma compared to gojo and nanami?  i could be nitpicking but the order of todo’s statement doesn’t line up with the sorcerers being shown.  let me explain in depth.  todo starts off by saying, “for those who have experienced black flash as compared to those who have not...” wouldn’t it make more sense to show gojo and nanami on the right side to represent sorcerers who have experienced black flash?  that was mentioned first, after all.  gojo and nanami should appear when todo says “for those who have experience black flash” while utahime and takuma should be shown right after to personify the second part, “as compared to those who have not.”  i’m just making it more complicated than it actually is LOLOL i’m sure it really just means they haven’t experienced black flash yet, which is completely fine.  i also find it fascinating how they used utahime to contrast gojo.  with nanami and takuma it makes sense.  nanami is someone takuma looks up to, he wants to gain nanami’s approval before he deems himself worthy of a promotion. what about utahime and gojo?  what’s the purpose of comparing those two together when it’s obvious that gojo knows more about the essence of cursed energy more than anyone else?  i might be delusional whoops

----

let me know what you guys think?  this is only a part 1 so i haven’t gotten around to answering the question.  i’m pretty much done with the second part, i just need to revise it a little.  i think after i post part 2, i’ll try to interpret all the gojo and utahime moments in the manga >.<

[merakiui]

welcome to the day a duck ruins your perception of items in genshin impact. i uh. made some items in genshin impact as yandere boys and what they're like sort of?? you could try and burn your eyes now. ;) adepti seekers stove- he's going to be a tsundere no buts or uhts. he's the type of yandere that's trying to be protective and failing miserably everytime. so being impatient and angsty. so, he resorts in kidnapping you instead. but hey look on the bright side! even when you're kidnapped you can have delicious meals and snacks! secretly likes to cook for you a lot, but he won't admit it even in death. just don't question why there's a lingering scent of sleeping potions in your meal and you'll be good as jolly jee! probably wants you to help him in the kitchen, since he once heard that couples do that. would probably give you self esteem issues down the line. "didn't i tell you to not get hurt? are you that much of an idiot?? here. have this it'll lessen the pain just a bit so we can walk back home. just drink it already." windsong lyre- smug bastard, smug shit. he's probably a player or just overly dramatic with everything. maybe he's righteous or something.. likes to show off his music skills a lot. he sucks at it tho. gaslights you probably in public places to add more pressure, because people are staring like you're having a performance or something. calls you love even if he's pissed at you for not listening to him, or accusing him of being toxic or suspecting him of being your stalker that always watches you from your window at 2am! would make you paranoid a lot. loves kissing your cheek and tickling you. he's a closeted pervert. you're gonna have to move in an isolated place too, he will spread rumours of you being his lover. "love, I'm sure that you're just overreacting. plus even if i was the stalker that you're talking about I wouldn't be oh so casually talking to you in public when I could've been hiding! jeez it's like your going crazy." wind-blessed harpastrum- such sweety! just so wholesome bakes you a pie in tuesday sweet. seems patient too but beware he will break your legs when you get a little bit too bratty for his tastes. touch starved too and it shows, that's why he loves to cuddle you lots! really obsessed with what you think of him. if you say you hate him he'll tear up and try to convince you that he's good, but if you pretend that you like him he'll shower you with uncomfortable affection and confessions. really great at making bombs and torture weapons too. probably sewed in a bomb inside your body threatened that he will kill you with it if you leave. bad at darts and archery. if you say that to him he'll laugh and take out his diploma saying that he's too smart for those childish games. he's impulsive in decision making. "haha. you know. you almost escaped from me back there. but hey! now you won't do anything stupid like that ever again if you can't walk." windblume balloon: listen man. im going to be killed but he's an airhead, pun intended right there. probably lowkey manipulative and doesn't even know it yet or chooses to ignore it. protective of you a lot. really delusional to the point that he rationalizes your escape as someone kidnapping you. so say goodbye to whoever poor stranger who was trying to help you escape they'll be greeted by an arrow through their head once he finds you. has a habit of holding your hand because he's afraid you might disappear from his line of sight and leave him all alone. if you let go tho he'll gorilla grip your hand, might crush it too. just very overprotective. he also doesn't know that he's an airhead. yeah."hm? why do i like holding you hand..? i just like it.. your hand makes me feel... uh. safe..? is that the word for it? ah. it was the word loved." wind catcher- he's a full on sadist. throw all of your escape plans out the window, this guy will climb a mountain and ride any wind current available to catch and torture you. persistently trying to make you like him atleast a bit. yeah, he's that kind of delusional. would teasingly push you

of a cliff as a 'light' punishment. dark humour and likes to joke about killing you from time to time. note: he can kill you. and he would also do it by ripping you in half with the wind current so just stay in his house and be a good lover that'll shower him in kisses, okay? okay. he mostly sees you as a tool of interest, but not just any tool- you're his favourite tool. "pfft! hey stop crying now! you're making me feel bad! hm? oh? why am i doing this? well i mean maybe I'm angry that someone was trying to escape. again." warming bottle- he will absolutely leave you in the cold if you were being a brat towards him. lives in dragonspine to spite you, also because he can just turn take away your blankets and anything that can give warmth so you gotta ask him to cuddle you to survive. he usually does this when he's feeling a little petty. which is so frequent. that you can almost give it a schedule. but don't tell him that. kind of a tsundere but only when it comes to physical affection since he's shy. that's why he has to take away your blankets so it looks like he's just mocking you but not because he's touch starved. he's not at home that much too but don't worry, he will make it up to you by uh.. physical activities.. "what? you're freezing? no shit we're in dragonspine. oh? you want me to hug you..? hm. fine. I'll indulge you for a bit. I am quite merciful." parametric transformer- businessman that scams you a lot lol. he's going to be a masochist because i said so, yeah i know the electric stone thing gag that's why i made him a masochist. really likes to collect useless stuff and spoiling you, so expect your room to be filled with a lot of random things from jewelry to mushrooms and crabs. has a you should be grateful i even give stuff mindset. thinks that giving someone something of vaue would make them fall in love with him instantly. also probably loves it when you fight back especially when you successfully land a hit on him, he will enjoy it. but be careful he has different responses whenever you hit him. pick your poison. spends a ton of resources on everything to keep you in line. that rope costed him 700 pinecones. "why do you even wanna escape? i give you a ton of stuff so you won't get bored! hah. maybe if i had picked up someone else they would've been grateful." portable waypoint- throw out your escape plans the season sequel. he's very quiet but has a small temper that won't last that much. maybe he's like that since he tries so hard to repress it. listen he's trying okay? escape always fails so quickly. one minute you're in springvale shouting, crying, begging for anyone to help you and then back to his house to see him sipping some tea. his punishments are cruel too- he makes sure to leave you in a den of monsters and ruin guards, waits until your in the brink of death and teleports you back to him. has a superiority complex over everyone too. probably likes to make you feel weak when you have to rely on him. loves to crush your self esteem. wants to be affectionate but thinks that you, as an inferior being, should be affectionate with him instead. so tsun. "see? this is what i was trying to tell you. you're too weak to actually survive out there. you even had to rely on me to save you. pathetic." memento lens- mysterious and elegant. he's quite cryptic to say the least. likes to watch you from a far if he's feeling a bit angsty. you try to make sense of what he says and it just leads to you being confused even more. and he likes that about you. you actually try to understand him, even if what you guess is wrong. you're going to have a tough time with this guy if you wanna escape. just avoid any fox statues and you'll be good. the problem is the shrine maidens. they basically want the two of you to end up together so they don't have to deal with him. he's actually very gentle with you punishments still suck but atleast he doesn't do it physically, he just makes you write that you're sorry over and over until your wrist are tired. loves poetry and solving puzzles, riddles, scriptures. he's

smart but soft. "spring blossoms even in the darkest depths of uncertainty, is that why you have the courage to try and escape me..?" kamera- perfectionist stalker. wants to make sure that the photos he takes of you are perfect to every extent. colour, lighting, and expressions. even if it means going inside your room and having the possibility of waking you up from your sleep. likes to take pictures of everything too. kind of like this; both of you are walking somewhere and he stops to take a picture of a sunset. he takes twenty minutes trying to find the correct angle. but the sun is already gone so he sulks. maybe- you can cheer him up by volunteering to be his model? you'll do that? right? also worships you like a god so if someone dared to even say something breath near you or celestia forbid insult you, best to say they'll be quickly disposed of by blackmail and fake shit. would not steal any of your belongings, he would just take pictures of it. so he's not that bad. "i consider everything in this world is beautiful, but you have surpassed that. so that is why im keeping you here. no one deserves even a glimpse of you!" waverider toolbox- he's such a gentlemen and a sweetheart. always there to help you with repairs, sometimes he'd add some updates to it too. just ignore the stuff going missing inside your boat thing. he probably guilt-gaslight you into staying with him in his waverider then bam your in an island stranded. ahaha, now both of you just have to survive by working together ya know? like a loving couple likes hugs and physical affection a lot! bonus points if it's given when he's tired from doing his job. as i said tired guy so appreciates all the things you do for him whether it's paying for his meal or giving him a gift. next time, he'll make sure that you won't leave the island permanently. thinks that stranded island equals date smh. " ahh? oh! is this for me? really? thank you.. i don't usually receive gifts but that just makes this even more special! say, do you wanna go on a trip? i just fixed the waverider from last time." red feather fan- mischievous little shit. likes to scare you a lot by appearing on trees and just jumping on you. knows that you're trying to escape but pretends not to since he likes to try and guess which direction you would run to. hugs you a lot even before he kidnaps you really touchy even if you say no he'll use the good ol puppy eyes! doesn't work? okay he'll just smell your clothes when you're sleeping as compensation. he likes to flirt with you a lot. some pickup are cheesy.. but others are a little- personal? acts cool by making a dramatic entrance everytime even. you know those radical superhero landing stuff? that's him. he would build a nest as your house even being a dick and placing it on top of a mountain, goodluck on trying to get down. "caught you! going to the shore was so predictable by the way. maybe you should try a different place next time, dear? hm? maybe a restaurant so we can have date? sounds great right?" serenitea pot- unhinged malewife that wants to make a the perfect living space for you- ehem. probably a perfectionist if you squint hard enough. he's delusional but just a little lucid about the stuff he does to you. likes to make a ton of furniture too! personalized the room you're trapped in with a ton of valuable and expensive materials. just don't try to escape he'll cut your limbs off just like a damn tree shawtie. owns a shit ton of pets ranging from boars to cats. all of them are like bodyguards to you during your stay. dreams about having a peaceful life with you in the realm someday, sigh. he sometimes has burnouts where he just places a bunch of furniture on a single room and call it a day. "and here is your room! do.. do you like it? i made it just for you! i didn't know what wood you would prefer so i just settled on whatever i can find! ahaha. we're kind of like a married couple living together now... right?" nre menu- he's probably going to be from the adventurers guild. really awkward and shy. takes for him a long time to

open up to you. when going on quests he's the one in charge of carrying the food and healing shit you need. really patient and nice! slightly uh mean with other people trying to talk to you but other than that everything is normal. everything is normal the long loving gaze he gives you every now and then and some food being left on your doorstep. yeah let's not question it i mean he's just so shy! he would never do anything wrong? right?? he's a closeted pervert, cliche i know but he's a pervert with a line to not cross. he just checks you out. good for him. would cry if given any ounce of affection. sweet baby. "t-that was a tough commission.. oh u-uh.. do you need some food to replenish your energy? we need to do the other commissions you know.. hm? why aren't you eating it.. something wrong with the food..?" seelies- spoiled. that's the word to describe him. really straight forward with his courting kind of dumb? but he's so damn lucky for some unknown reason that your plans to avoid him always fail. yeah the high quality rope you just bought for 1000 mora? it broke and you fell into his arms. he's probably rich by sheer dumb luck too. finds a ton treasure chests even in the places you didn't expect. people pressure you into spending time with him. since he's just so cute! how could say no to such a face? it really feels like the gods are on his side ya know? he throws a lot of very very aggressive tantrums if you're not with him. thinks he's doing a good job at courting you, with rationalize rejection as a playing hard to get. "tada! look i got you this crystal i found while i was walking! it looks like a diamond and it has a ton of colours too?? is it valuable?? would you kiss me if i give it to you??" endora- majestic, regal, and likes to explore a lot. he uh. probably trapped you in a bubble once or twice too. really curious about his surroundings, also has no personal space since it's first time going out. he would cuddle you when he feels like it homie. kidnapped you and made you his tour guide. don't try to fool him he learns quickly about stuff. fast swimmer, so no joining any expeditions in water if you don't want their ship to be wrecked by a mysterious being of the teyvat seas. he likes to see you cry. it's not a kink he just feels connected to you when you cry. doesn't have a house so you just live in a run down boat. he's doesn't know when you're lying to him sometimes. god complex bastard. "this world. at first i wasn't sure if i was going to like it or not, but ever since I've met you... I've grown to tolerate some parts.. so you should be thankful, you've convinced me. mortal." intertwined fate/older twin- listen. he's just so smug about everything he does. and he knows you love him. probably invites you out on dinner only for him to not show up. so basically he's an asshole without a doubt. toxic boyfriend that gives you false hope and has a ton of admirers. you probably think he won't settle for you right? ah, he's not that cruel. so picks you as his lover out of all the billions of people. you should be grateful! he even kidnapped you! do you know how hard it was for him to go all the way from his home to yours? anyways yeah. asshole. he likes to do the open the door for darling trick where he just gives you a small crack on the door and watch you make a decision. it's an act of your loyalty. if you escape he'll make you feel pain. if you don't then he'll reward your patience. god complex bastard 2."sigh. did you try to escape? again? patience is the key to everything you know. maybe you should learn that. i expected more smart from you." acquaint fate/younger twin- cinnamonroll he's such a sweet guy. he's always there for you when you need him. okay- he has a nice guy complex, fucking damn it. probably uses the but I've been there for you since the start trick unintentionally a lot. he just doesn't know he wants some action, so be thankful that he didn't just jump on you like a barbarian. he's kind of contradicting himself too. one hand he wants you to love him, on the other hand he doesn't

believe he deserves you. loves to give you the same things, remember that one painting you liked from two years ago? he got you that. quantity beats quality. surprisingly, he's really patient but would have bursts of anger every now and then. has a self value issues?? yeah, but did i tell you he's a touch starved guy. punshments are just him softly lecturing you about what's good and what's wrong."i always viewed myself as inferior, that i didn't deserve anything.. but this time. i want to be greedy just once." that's it- :'D i haven't proofread this but here you go mer! ill probably continue with more humanisations of items in genshin later.. if you ask why i ruined your day with this crazy idea i was watching that one video of a person humanising social media and got this idea. also i discovered how to bold out texts... i have power..ejwjdhshaj

so yeah have a great day! -🦆anon

I AM IN AWE?!?! WHOA OMG!!!!! 🦆, THIS IS FANTASTIC!! AAAAAA (≧∀≦)

All of the various characterizations… *chef’s kiss* It’s literally so good! With each one I read I kept thinking okay this guy is my favorite and then I would read the next description and my heart was stolen again. I can’t pick a favorite now. T_T

[dankovskaya]

OK OK OK fuck let me gather some thoughts. I will NOT suck Disney star wars penis I will not but let it be known this show is the first thing I've been genuinely extremely excited about in. Basically this entire era of star wars content.

Let me be a hater first it looks really bad. In traditional Disney fashion. It's too clean and boring with no interesting visuals no interesting cinematography pretty much all the alien makeup looks horrible everyone is dressed boring as hell and the plot so far is essentially exactly the same as the mandalorian's premise. So in that sense it is extremely safe and nothing groundbreaking. A lot of the dialogue is really clunky and some jokes do not land very well at all and did I mention it's Ugly. It looks like a marvel film it's ugly. There's like an odd tone as well I can't really describe it like it doesn't change to fit the type of scene at all it's just an oppressive sameness all throughout. Which I guess is another Disney trademark.

That being said I am a known prequels obsessive and just seeing Ewan back as obi wan makes me emotional I can't help it I just can't. Every reference to Anakin or Padme made me crazy the starving veteran clone trooper made me crazy Hell even Owen Lars made me crazy. I am not well or normal about Star wars.

And ok I know child hatred has reached fucking critical mass because I've already seen people complaining about Leia when she is absolutely adorable extremely believable as a child version of Leia and like. The CLEAR highlight of the show lmfao she is ridiculously cute and most of the jokes that are actually funny come from her. I'm like ecstatic about her being the focus so far. Inquisitor Reva is stupid sexy too I am obsessed with everything about her and very excited to see her interact with Vader lol. But it's annoying as hell that they decided to use a Black woman (of which there are extremely extremely few in star wars media in general) for the uh Angry excessively ruthless and impulsive Jedi hunter who is implied to be of Lower Class Origins like it's not even funny. They haven't gone into her very deep yet but. Come on now. Not that im surprised though Star Wars and racism are congenital.

And OK I've never actually really found Obi Wan attractive LMAO like in any of the movies I'm just not into Ewan McGregor I guess but seeing him like. Wayyy out of practice with Violence half getting his ass beat fighting off the bounty hunters and shit #Street Style in his old raggedy clothes greasy hair flopping around... I was a little into it I won't lie. I will stop here before I lose my marbles.

Do not reblog this I will show up at your house.

[tobesolonely]

muse

A/n: hello everyone!! im very excited to put this out :-) i was going to make a long one shot but ive never written anything multi-part before and i wanted to give it a go!! also my first time with an oc 🌟so i hope everyone enjoys!! not sure when the next part will come out but i wanna upload at least once a week or every two weeks or something idk haha but anywayssss lmk ur thoughts!

biggest, biggest thank u to my love @harryysstyless​ for beta reading and being so encouraging<333 luv u!!

photographer oc x harry styles

please let me know your thoughts on miss aminah, iman, serena, and harry!

my ko-fi! thank you :)

Los Angeles was your newest muse.

You had always been the spontaneous type. It came as no shock to your family and friends when you told them you had purchased a one-way ticket and were moving across the country. Although your parents weren’t too keen on the idea of their daughter moving so far away from them, they helped you withdraw your savings and find a modest apartment in LA before sending you on your way.

Your reason for moving to LA was simple, really. You were a freelance photographer that felt your career was growing rather… stagnant. You had a thick portfolio and were proud of the work you produced, but your clientele wasn’t as impressive as you’d hope it would be after nearly six years of working at it.

And so began your desire to move from New York to Los Angeles— one big city to the next.

People who knew you often described you as ambitious, fiery, and an absolute go-getter. If your big move scared you in any way, no one knew any better. Your confidence never faltered— not even in the slightest.

After nearly three months of being in LA, you developed a routine of sorts. You’d wake up, eat a breakfast that almost always consisted of avocado toast and coffee, and go on a run. After your run, you would come home, shower, and decide how far you wanted to venture to take pictures that day.

Sometimes your roommates, Serena and Iman, would join you to keep you company. Although you’d never met either one of them before answering their ad for a roommate on Craigslist, you had grown extremely close to the girls in the few months that you’d known them. Despite the two girls being friends since their childhood, they never made you feel left out, and you fit in with them effortlessly.

During your short time in the city, there were so many places you had been, but still, even more you had yet to see. Serena and Iman, both native Angelenos, would often suggest spots for you to check out and even offer to drive you around— you were from New York after all, and at twenty-four years old, you were still not the owner of a driver's license.

“You’ve never been to North Hollywood yet, right Aminah?” Iman questioned as you all lounged around, trying to come up with a place you had not yet been.

“No, I haven’t really gone anywhere farther than walking distance,” you reply, looking around the cramped living room for your camera bag. “Or the places you guys have driven me. That was still considered Downtown though, right? Where we went the other day?” You were still getting used to how absolutely massive Los Angeles was.

“We should go to Santa Monica or something— wait, Malibu!” Serena exclaims. “We have to go to Malibu, Mina. It’s so nice there, you could totally get a bunch of good shots.”

“Yeah, we might even see a celebrity!” Iman chimes in, stifling laughter.

It was an on-going joke between the three of you. When you first moved to LA, you told your roommates that you couldn’t wait to make your way around the city because you were hoping to run into a celebrity. It was Los Angeles after all— you figured they were everywhere.

You quickly learned that wasn’t the case. Celebrities here kept a low-profile and even if you did encounter a celebrity, it’s not like you would approach them. “You’re not funny, Iman,” you tell your roommate with a roll of your eyes.

“Yes I am,” Iman quips, wiggling her eyebrows. “If we’re gonna go to Malibu then I gotta change. Can I borrow a cute shirt from anyone?”

A short twenty minutes later, the three of you were piled in Serena’s car on your way to Malibu. You’d heard of the city before and knew it was a wealthy area, but that’s about it. Your roommates promised you that out of all the beaches in LA, Malibu had the nicest ones, and lots of places to take pictures. Since none of you had anything to do, you all decided it was as good a day as any to have a beach day and get some shots of your roommates to add to your portfolio. Since you didn’t know anyone except Serena and Iman, the pictures on your camera from the last few months consisted entirely of nature and inanimate objects. While it was good practice, you really preferred to photograph actual people.

“Traffic is so bad today,” you say from the backseat after traveling approximately two feet in five minutes. Iman snorts from the passenger side.

“When isn’t traffic bad, Mina,” she turns to look at you, an amused look on her face. “Don’t worry about it. It always gets backed up at this fuckin’ exit and then as soon as we get past it there’s like, zero traffic.”

“Right! I always complain about how shitty this exit is. I have no clue who designed it,” Serena adds, skipping through songs on her playlist. “It’s still early in the day, though. I’m just hoping the beach won’t be too crowded by the time we get there.”

“I don’t care how crowded the beach is. I just don’t want it to take us forty minutes to find parking…”

You tune out your roommate's voices, instead choosing to focus on the traffic jam outside the car. To Serena and Iman, people who were born and raised in Los Angeles, the city wasn’t necessarily anything special. Sure, they loved how there was always something to do, but the bad drivers, traffic, and smog got old. The novelty of LA hadn’t yet worn off to you, though. You didn’t know how your roommates were content to sit inside the apartment all day when there were tons of things to do basically right outside your doorstep. You felt like you were the one convincing them to go out with you half of the time, and you didn’t even know where you were going.

After what feels like almost entirely too long but was really only half an hour, Serena pulls into a fairly empty parking lot. “Are we not allowed to be here?”

“Why do you think that?” Iman asks, squinting her eyes to read a sign. “It doesn’t say it’s closed. I mean, there are a few cars–– look.” She points to a few cars scattered around the parking lot.

“I mean, it is nine in the morning on a Wednesday. People are probably at work,” you tell the two girls in the front seat. “Besides, there’s someone in the parking booth. Can you even close a beach?”

Serena drives forward, rolling down her window. “I mean, I guess not. You can close the parking lot, though.” You hum in agreement. She quickly pays for parking and tosses her receipt on the dashboard before driving slowly through the parking lot.

“I love when no one’s at the beach,” Iman sighs, clapping her hands. “No one will get in the way of your picture-taking either, Meens.”

You smile at the nickname. “Yeah, that’s true. We picked a perfect time to come too, guys. The lighting’s great.”

“Really? Is it gonna make my skin pop?” Iman turns around and sticks her arm out, sensually running her fingers along it.

“You always look good no matter what the lighting’s like, Iman,” you reply, refraining from rolling your eyes at her. “You have the glowiest complexion out of all of us.”

“We’re literally all the same skin-tone, Aminah,” she retorts, crossing her arms.

“We have different undertones, though,” you answer. “So not really. Plus, Serena is way lighter than us! What are you talking about?”

“Should I park here?” Serena asks, interrupting your conversation.

“Why here? All these empty spots and you wanna park directly next to this car?”

“This is a good spot, Iman. It’s a parking lot. If they didn’t want anyone to park next to them, they should’ve taken an Uber and got dropped off.” She turns into the spot, quickly putting the car in park and crossing her arms to prove her point.

You unbuckle your seatbelt, smiling at your friends’ bickering. They were so close they were basically sisters. They argued sometimes and were quick to call the other out on their shit, and you loved it.

“I just think you’re weird for parking next to this car. It’s a nice car.”

“Who cares, girl?” Serena groans, exasperated. “We’re gonna be on the beach. They’ll probably be gone before we will.” She pops the trunk before unplugging her phone from the aux cord and stepping outside. Iman mimics her before flinging the door open as well and stepping out of the car.

You make sure your camera bag is closed all the way before situating it over your shoulder and climbing out of the car as well.

“It’s kinda cold,” Iman says, wrapping her arms around her body. “If I knew it would be so overcast I would’ve bought a jacket.” Serena hums in agreement and you look up at the sky, unphased.

“It’s like, seventy degrees?” you look at the weather app on your phone in confirmation.

“We get it, Meens. You’re from New York,” Serena teases, closing her trunk. She hands you a few towels and a blanket to carry while she rolls the cooler and Iman carries the beach chairs and umbrella.

“It’s a cold seventy degrees and you know it,” Iman defends. “Look at my goosebumps. I can’t fake this shit.” You shake your head at your overly dramatic friends and follow them down to the beach. You take off your sandals as soon as you’re off the pavement, wiggling your toes in the cold sand.

“We can set up pretty much wherever we want,” Serena points out, tucking flyaway curls behind her ears. “Where do you think the best place to be is, Mina? Y’know, so you can get good pictures?”

“It doesn’t really matter, to be honest,” you tell them distractedly, too busy looking around the beach in awe. Your friends were right–– out of all the beaches you’d visited in Los Angeles so far, this one was the nicest (and cleanest). “Maybe we can get a little closer to the water?”

The three of you walk for a couple of minutes before Iman abruptly stops, dramatically dropping everything she was carrying. “Let’s just set up here. There’s no one around anyway, it doesn’t matter.”

“There actually is someone around,” you tell them, looking at a stranger who seemed to be fixated on staring at you and your friends. “Don’t look, but a cute guy is staring at us.” Serena and Iman immediately turn around, shading their eyes from the bit of sun that was starting to peek through the clouds. The guy couldn’t have been more than twenty yards away from where you were setting up.

...“Huh,” Serena says, turning back around. “Is it just me, or does that guy look a lot like Harry Styles?” She looks back over her shoulder again, but he’s no longer staring at the three of you, focusing on what appeared to be a book instead.

“Why would Harry Styles be at the beach by himself at nine in the morning?” Iman asks, unfolding a beach chair and flopping down on it.

“Why wouldn’t he? It’s Malibu, dude,” Serena responds. You could tell your friends were about to start bickering again, so you quickly jump in.

“Doesn’t matter. Neither one of you would go up to him even if it was, so what’s the point in arguing about it?” They both raise their eyebrows at you.

“And you would, Mina? Bullshit!” Iman exclaims, laughing. “I dare you to go see if it’s him, and if it is, ask him if he wants to join us.”

“That’s weird! What if it’s not him?”

“Even if it’s not him, we’ll still get to hang out with a cute boy.” Iman points out. Serena nods in agreement and you can’t deny that she makes a convincing argument. “Just ask him if he wants a mimosa or something!”

“No, don’t ask that,” Serena interjects. “Tell him that you’re a photographer and you’re working on building a new portfolio. Ask him if he would be cool with you photographing him.”

You narrow your eyes at her. “Are you sure that’s not weird, Serena?”

“Aminah, trust me. I wouldn’t deliberately let you make yourself look weird.” Your roommate reassures you.

And so you found yourself clearing the short distance to where the handsome stranger was laid, half hoping it was Harry Styles, half hoping it was not. You couldn’t act like you weren’t a fan of him–– you thought he was incredibly attractive and enjoyed his music just like most people. If Harry Styles was the first celebrity you encountered during your short time in Los Angeles, you‘d never stop talking about it. Ever.

When you’re almost to him he looks up, dog-earring the page he’s on. After making eye contact with him, there’s no mistaking that this is Harry Styles. You pinch the back of your hand, urging yourself not to freak out. He has a knowing look on his face and you’re grateful for your darker complexion that hides your blush.

“Hi,” you speak first, stopping a few feet away from him. “Uh, my friends and I are just uh, we’re... you know.” You internally wince at your inability to form a coherent sentence. His gaze never breaks from yours and you look away first, growing shyer by the second. If you thought he was beautiful on Instagram, he was even more gorgeous in person. It was incredible.

“Hi,” he finally says after a brief moment of silence. “‘M sorry if I was starin’ at you ladies a moment ago. I jus’ usually never see anyone else this early out here. Are you a photographer?”

You almost ask him how he knows when you realize your camera is still hanging around your neck. “Oh, yeah. Yeah, I am.” He’s still staring intently at you.

“Would you like to sit?”

You look over your shoulder at Serena and Iman who were pretending to be preoccupied putting on sunscreen, but you know they were waiting for you to come back with the man you now knew to be Harry Styles.

“Oh, my friends are waiting for me,” Harry looks up at you patiently, waiting for you to continue speaking. “I was actually going to photograph them. I’m working on building up my portfolio. I understand if you can’t for… I dunno, legal reasons? Or if you just don’t want to–– and that’s fine if you don’t, but would it be okay if I photographed you as well?”

“That actually sounds like a lot of fun. It’s kinda boring jus’ readin’ out here on my own,” he agrees quickly, surprising you. Harry stands up and stretches a bit before leaning down to gather up his blanket, towel, water bottle, and book. “What’s your name? I’m Harry.”

You know that Harry knows that you know exactly who he is, but the fact that he introduced himself to you makes him even more endearing. “It’s nice to meet you. I’m Aminah.”

Harry extends his free hand to you. “It’s very nice to meet you, Aminah.” You love the way your name sounds coming out of his mouth.

As you approach Serena and Iman, their eyes go wide when they realize it really was him. Serena nudges Iman and you know without even having heard it that she’s saying, “I told you so!” Harry stops a bit behind you, smiling at them.

“Hello,” he starts. “S’okay if I join you ladies? Aminah here extended such a nice offer that I jus’ couldn’t pass it up, but wanna check with the two of you first.”

Serena’s mouth is shamelessly hanging open, and you realize that she may have been a bigger fan than she let on. Iman answers for them. “Of course! Mina’s building her portfolio and I bet it would look like, super cool, if you were a part of it!” Harry nods, setting the few things he had with him down.

“I don’t think I would even be the center of attention if ‘m sittin’ beside you beautiful ladies. I’ll jus’ act as a prop or something,” he flashes them a dimpled smile. “If you don’t mind me asking, what are your names? I’m Harry.”

“We know,” Iman answers a little too quickly. “I’m Iman and this is Serena.” Serena gives him a timid wave.

“Well, it’s very nice to meet you all. Are you guys from around here?” He lays his blanket beside all of your stuff and sits down cross-legged, not once breaking eye contact with any of you. You had no idea how he did it.

“We live Downtown. We’re only over here so Mina could get some good pictures, she’s a photographer,” Iman answers proudly. “She’s amazing, but she’ll never admit it.”

“Iman…,” you trail off. “Stop, dude.”

“It’s true,” Serena jumps into the conversation, now seemingly over the initial shock of who was sitting barely two feet away from her. “She’s the best photographer I know.” Harry turns to look at you, an amused look on his face.

“That’s a hefty claim. I can’t wait to see your photography skills, Aminah.”

“They’re just hyping me up,” you reply, making a mental note to yell at your friends for embarrassing you once the three of you were alone again. “I’m not that good.”

“That looks pretty professional to me,” Harry says, gesturing to the camera that has not yet left your neck since arriving at the beach. “I bet you’re just as good as they say you are.” You look away, hiding your face. Iman, being the wing woman she is, can tell you’re growing flustered from all the attention and moves the conversation away from you.

“Do any of y’all want a mimosa?” Before anyone can even answer her, she’s popping open the champagne and handing the orange juice to Serena to open. Harry politely declines, as he drove himself to the beach that morning. You and Iman are ultimately the only ones who indulge in a drink since you were the only ones not driving.

Talking to Harry was like catching up with an old friend. He wanted to know everything about the three of you and whenever he felt the conversation was becoming too much about him, he quickly changed the subject. Harry learned that Iman and Serena have been friends since the second grade when Iman pushed some boy off of the monkey bars for teasing Serena. He learned your favorite take-out spots, your favorite bars, and what freeways Iman and Serena tried to avoid at all cost (it was the 405, which he agreed with). What seemed to intrigue Harry the most, though, was him learning that you just moved from New York and had never even been to Los Angeles before moving.

“Why did you pick somewhere all the way across the country that you’d never even vacationed at before?” He had a look of confusion written across his face. You shrug, not really knowing the answer.

“I mean, I’ve seen it on TV shows and in movies. That doesn’t count?” you joke. Harry still looks utterly bewildered.

“I mean… no?”

Serena laughs. “We were just as confused as you were, Harry. We were scared for a moment when she moved in because we were like, oh shit, what if she’s insane? You know? Like, what sane person would move all the way across the country to live somewhere they’d never even vacationed before?”

You let out an offended, “heyyyy”, lightly smacking Serena’s thigh. “I just needed a change and I’m a drastic person! I either go all-in when I do something, or I just don’t do it at all.” You defend yourself.

“I actually think that’s really fuckin’ cool,” Harry says after a moment. “Sometimes I wish I could just… up an’ go. Y’know?” you all nod, and it falls silent again. “Well, should we take some pictures now?”

Any intimidation you felt to photograph Harry disappeared as soon as he started posing for you.

Being that he was a major celebrity, he was no stranger to posing for a photoshoot. Harry was ethereal–– you knew the pictures of him would most likely require minimal to no editing. Serena and Iman also looked incredible, and you were thankful to have such gorgeous people as your muses. You were taking pictures of them in various places around the beach, only stopping once it started getting too crowded. There were starting to be too many people in the background of your shots and Harry wanted to get going, not particularly in the mood to be recognized. The three of you decide you should get going too. You had more than enough pictures to go through and besides, you were all starting to grow hungry.

Harry follows the three of you to the parking lot, keeping his head down the entire way. The closer you got to Serena’s car, the sadder you got. You didn’t want to stop talking to Harry and photographing him. However, you knew you were just in the right place at the right time, and it was likely that you’d never cross paths with him any time soon–– if ever again.

“Thank you for letting me photograph you,” you tell him sincerely once you were almost to Serena’s car. “That was really kind of you. I can promise you I won’t post them anywhere without your permission or like, disclose the location or anything like that.”

Harry finally looks up, determining you were far enough away from the crowds and he was no longer at risk of getting recognized. “It was my pleasure, really. Thank you for inviting me to hang out with you and your friends. It was a lot of fun getting to know you all.” You feel your body heat up.

“Where did you park?”

“Right there,” Harry points straight ahead. “You?”

You let out a loud laugh, causing Serena and Iman, who was walking slightly ahead of you and Harry, to turn around and look at the two of you. “We parked right next to you! Iman was getting on Serena for parking next to you because the lot was pretty much empty when we got here this morning.”

Harry lets out a breathy chuckle. “I guess it’s fate that we crossed paths then, yeah?” You let out a quiet hum in agreement, stopping a few feet in front of Serena’s car. You hear her and Iman debating on where you should stop for lunch, but you were waiting to see what Harry would say next.

“Aminah? After you get a chance to look at those pictures, do you think you can send them to my manager? His name’s Jeff. I’d love to see how they come out.”

“Oh yeah, of course! Do you have his business card or something?” You were excited that Harry actually cared to see your work but based on the couple of hours you spent interacting with him, you learned he was just an overall insanely kind person.

“I can jus’ put his contact info in your phone? If you don’t mind,” his gaze falters, a sheepish look on his face.

“Totally! Let me just unlock my phone,” you dig in the pocket of your shorts, pulling your phone out and unlocking it with your face. You hand it over to him and while he’s looking down typing you glance over at your roommates who had shocked looks on their faces. You would explain to them later that he wasn’t giving you his number, just his managers, but for now, you’d let them think he was giving his number to you out of all people–– a total stranger.

Harry hands it back to you a few moments later, running his fingers through his hair. “Thank you again for such a great morning, Aminah. I’ll let you get goin’, don’t wanna hold you ladies up any longer,” he waves at Serena and Iman. “It was really nice to meet all of you. Hope to see you all again soon.” You notice that his gaze lingers on you for a moment when he says that, and you feel your body heat up for what must have been at least the tenth time that day.

The three of you watch as Harry unlocks his car and throws his items haphazardly into the passenger side before climbing in, slamming the door shut. His car starts immediately afterwards and he gives you a quick nod before quickly backing out of the spot, leaving. None of you say anything for a bit, just processing what just happened. Serena is the first one to speak, her hand on the handle of her car door.

“Are you fucking kidding me? Harry fucking Styles?” her voice raises at least two octaves and you know she’s about to have a mini freakout. “Did he ask for your number, Meens?”

“No dude, he just gave me his manager's number. He wants to see how the pictures come out after I edit them,” you tell her, opening the backseat of her car. “It’s not a big deal.”

“Uh, that’s definitely a big deal, Aminah. Stop being so humble,” Iman tells you, exaggerated annoyance lacing her voice. “Did you see how he looked at you? When he said, ‘Hope to see you all again soon’?” She puts on a terrible posh accent.

“You’re so annoying,” you groan, shaking out the blanket and beach towels before throwing them onto the seat. “Where are we gonna eat?”

Iman and Serena pile into the car as well, telling you about the three restaurants they were stuck choosing between. You hum distractedly, typing the name ‘Jeff’ into your contacts to see if Harry left a number and an email, or just an email. Your brows furrowed in confusion when you see the name is nowhere to be found in your contact list. You chalk up the mistake to Harry just forgetting to press ‘save’ after creating the contact and figure you can just find his manager’s contact information on the internet somewhere. As you’re scrolling back up through your contact list, your eye lands on a name that makes your breath hitch in your throat.

Harry Styles.

[stargirlfics]

Hey. Newbie here. Ive noticed some of your works include non consent or dubious consent as well as some “consensual” physical assault or contact (shoving,smacking,slapping). This is a very personal question so if it hits too close to home for you I understand you wanting not expose that. Do you and your fiancé participate in those acts? I found you from a sweet Henry blurb and started following but when I saw some of the dark things I got concerned. It’s my first time being introduced to that type of writing so I originally thought you may have been writing about your life through the lens of a character. Some ppl do this as a cry for help. It seems as though this is a common form of writing on tumblr though. I guess im trying to make sense of it. I’ve always associated those things with abuse or sexual assault so to see it written differently I guess it’s one of those things where my brain isn’t allowing me to adopt a new understanding of it. Is that scary for you? To be under someone’s complete control? Has the physical part ever gone too far? How to you even present that to your partner? I would think asking someone to be physical with you may trigger some concerns but I’m sure he is very compassionate and protective of you. Was participating in non consensual or dub consensual something you had to open up to or did you always have a fetishized for it? I know im asking a lot but im going to be a psychologist and therapist one day (fingers crossed😊🤞🏾) and I feel like I may encounter these kinds of clients for psych therapy so I’d like to gain inside perspective on what it’s like for them. I don’t want to be biased because of how I was raised. There is always more to learn. Again i hope I didn’t offend or overwhelm. This is the first time I’ve seen this realm of sexual fantasy and kink. I’m not really a fanfic reader but I started to get into it bc I like reading and wanted to try something new. I also follow a Henry page after crushing on him watching Witcher. Your page is introducing me to new lifestyles. I’m genuinely curious as again historically we’ve been trained to view it one way. Thanks for listening to my incessant ramble. Hope all is well!👍🏾

Hi! So to start off I’m gonna link a post I made with some good resources and links that really go into depth with the why and how of dark content and fantasies, I think you’ll find that really helpful or at least I hope so that can explain more throughly than I can! I appreciate you just wanting to learn more!

And as for your questions, me and my bf don’t participate in cnc or dubcon within our relationship so I can’t speak for how that is but I’ll try and answer the rest of your questions in a way that will hopefully make sense. So we have a dom/sub aspect to our relationship where he is more dominant and I do like something called impact play and am quite submissive and masochistic in a sexual sense so there is rough sex involved in my relationship at times and there is bondage and choking and slapping and spanking and more bdsm centered kinks but in my writing I do explore fantasies of a darker tone and just writing in general that’s like a thriller story but the dark or twisted/violent things I may write in those stories aren’t my own experiences or a cry for help I promise!

I’m not sure how familiar you are with bdsm but it is best practice to have an open conversation with your partner about your kinks and limits, soft and hard limits, boundaries, safe words, aftercare, etc before engaging in anything and the same applies for cnc or dubcon or other darker/taboo kinks so that it can be done as safely as possible and within everyone’s limits who are involved

In terms of the physical slapping or spanking, choking, just being handled roughly personally it can be scary but in a way that excites me because I know I’m safe and it’s with someone I trust that knows my limits and boundaries and won’t cross them and if it ever does become too much or goes too far I know and trust that I can always say my safe word or ask for things to be dialed back and things will stop and I can check in with my partner and stop completely or continue

My partner does have the control when he is being dominant either sexually or in general in our realtionship but again that’s within specific perimeters that we discussed and agreed upon beforehand so it isn’t scary to give him and allow him to have control over me or things that I am comfortable with him having control over, it actually feels safe and allows me to feel taken care of and relaxed and held in his hands essentially. I enjoy being submissive (again within my limits and this will vary from person to person which is why discussion of this and communication is key especially with darker kinks) and the physical aspect of it is still done with absolute care and safety in mind!

Your question about presenting darker kinks to a partner simply starts with being able to maturely and responsible discuss sex and what that would look like in the relationship, all about good listening and communication and respect and trust. Things like dubcon or cnc fantasies or fantasies of kidnapping roleplays, knife play, etc can’t be initiated right away, trust needs to be gained and earned first ideally and I think for most people it is that way, they develop a relationship with someone, a sexual relationship is established and from there things are added or explored and those darker things hopefully are brought in with care and an easing into it especially if one or all people involved aren’t experienced in all of that

Asking my partner to be a little more physical with me or to handle me roughly/how they wanted did bring up concerns which led to discussions and a slow easing into those things I was asking for and things he also wanted to try out. He is very protective and caring for me which is why I feel so safe engaging in some of these things and he of course has his limits as well with what he’s comfortable doing to me and not. There hasn’t been a time things have gone too far but that’s because we have a system in place where I give him a sign when I need things to be taken down a notch or to slow down so it doesn’t even have to get to a point of too far if that makes sense! Whether you participate in them irl or just like to read or write dark scenarios and dark themes I think most of us try and do proper research and give it the respect it needs to be done safely!

For your other question, noncon and dubcon, etc actually wasn’t something I understood at first or really thought was for me. I think I read a story or a fanfic with noncon themes and it was hard for me to read, I was a little confused but also felt enthralled with the storyline and the suspense and dread and lack of control there was, so I explored it a bit more and it took me some time to get used to it and understand it and eventually I decided I did enjoy those things, some of which I felt comfortable introducing to my actual life and some not

I hope this helps you understand it a little better and again I appreciate you having an open mind and wanting to learn more! 🖤 Hope those links prove even more helpful too!

[rebelwrites]

Never Going To Be Alone Part 3

Jax Teller x Reader

“You gonna actually do something today kiddo?” dad asked, knocking your feet off the coffee table passing you a mug of coffee.

“Yeah this” you nodded at the Tv.

“Yeah I didn’t mean binge watching tv and you know it” he sighed, he had never seen you in a slump like this before.

“Nope” you mumbled looking back at the tv.

It had been two weeks since you moved into your dad’s place. You ignored all the notifications off the guys and especially Jax. Hearing the front door slam shut you sighed, there was only one person who it could be.

“Where is the little shit?” The sounds of your older brother’s voice boomed through the house.

“You told Xander” you huffed.

“Too right he fucking did” Xander said taking the coffee out your grasp before he scooped you into his arms making you squeal.

“Put me down you asshole” you screamed as he carried you upstairs and into the bathroom.

Dropping you into the bath he reached up and turned the shower on, completely soaking you.

“I’m gonna fucking kill you” you hissed.

“Hey I was nice and put it on warm” Xander shrugged “now hurry up and shower I want you showered and dressed in the hour”

Rolling your eyes as he closed the bathroom door giving you privacy you stripped out of your wet clothes tossing them into the wash basket, washing away the dirt from the last couple of days.

As you were wrapping a towel around your body you heard Xander’s voice on the other side of the door.

“Yeah I know she’s gonna kill me but I don’t care you haven't see the mood she’s in” he whispered but not quiet enough “no I don’t know, yeah she’s here, wait for my text okay”

Opening the door you saw your brother jump before quickly ending the call.

“Who you on the phone to?” You asked as you walked into your old room.

“None of your business now hurry up and get dressed” Xander said crossing his arms across his chest.

“Swear to god if you don’t get on your bike and follow me I will kill you” Gemma hissed at Jax.

“Why where we going?” He asked as he never took his eyes off his phone, for the last couple of days he kept seeing the little three dots on your conversation like you were typing but no messaging ever came.

“To visit a friend now shut up and just follow me” Gemma nodded.

“You are up to something” you huffed parking your bike in front of the lake.

“I’m just looking out for my baby sister” He smiled pulling you into your arms. Guiding you over to the rocks by the lake. You did notice him quickly sending a text before putting his phone in the pocket of his leather jacket.

“Talk to me squirt” he said softly as you sat down.

“What is there to talk about?” You sighed pulling your knees to your chest resting your head on his shoulder.

“Stop keeping things bottled up. We know it’s only a matter of time before you explode” he said.

“I made an absolute fool of myself Xander” you sighed as tears clouded your vision. “Yes I was drunk but I didn’t think I was stupid”

“You are not stupid”

“I must be for thinking my best friend of what 15 years would ever see me as anything more than his best friend” you huffed “I mean look at me, I ran away to save myself the heartache but somehow cause myself more in the process”

“Come on you know boys are stupid and they don’t see what’s right under their noses” Xander laughed “look how long it took me and Sarah to get together”

“Every goddamn day my heart tells me to just text him, I write my fucking feelings in a text and then my brain takes over and I delete it like it doesn’t matter” you sighed as tears ran down your cheeks. “I don’t even care anymore I just miss my fucking best friend, I’ve accepted the fact we will never be anything more, this is the longest we have gone without speaking yet I’m a fucking stubborn bitch who has hurt her pride”

Xander stayed silent, with your head resting on his shoulder looking out at the water, he glanced over to Jax who was standing a couple of feet away and heard everything you had said. Staring at the blonde before moving his eyes to you Jax got the hint.

“I fucking miss my best friend too”

You knew who the voice belonged to without even looking up, you would always know that gravely tone. Lifting your head up you glared at Xander.

“You are an asshole” you mumbled.

“You will be thanking me later squirt” he smiled kissing your head “I will leave you kids to talk”

Pulling your cigarettes out of your jacket as Xander left you on the rock and Jax took his place. You both sat in silence not really knowing what to say.

After a couple of moments you spoke up.

“I guess you heard all of what I just said?” You asked, turning your head to him, he looked just as bad as you did.

“Yeah darlin’ I did” Jax said “how long have you felt like this?”

“Years now” you whispered “well since high school”

“Why didn’t you say something?” He whispered, taking your free hand in his playing with your fingers.

“What was the point, it’s not like you see me as anything other than your best friend” you sighed as the tears started running down your cheeks again.

“You really believe that” he said slowly “because darlin’ it is far from the truth, I didn’t think you saw me more than your best friend so I didn’t do anything because I’d rather have you in my life as my bestie than not have you in my life at all”

“So why when I kissed you did you just sit there?” You sniffed.

“Because I’m an idiot and you caught me completely off guard” he sighed pulling you into his arms “I went by your place and was confused when I saw it empty until I saw the smashed photo of us and then it hit me”

Your body was melting into his touch like it always did, your heart felt a little bit lighter as he played with the ends of your hair.

“I realised that amongst all the chaos that is my life the one constant in it was you. I fell in love with all of you without even realising it” Jax whispered placing his fingers under your chin so you were looking at him.

“I didn’t just fall in love with the best of you like the way your eyes light up the room, the way just hearing your laugh makes me smile, the way your hand fits perfectly in mine when you drag me off to show me something, the way your personality stands out, the way your smile gives me butterflies that I always ignored or the way your body moves” Jax whispered as he used his thumb to wipe your tears away as you stayed quiet.

“I fell in love with your scars, the way you always have a sarcastic comment, the way you feel helpless at two in the morning and call me and we stay up just eating ice cream, the way you cry about something that happened years ago, the way you have probably the shortest temper known to man, or the way you sometimes want to be alone” he whispered as his eyes filled with tears “I fell in love with the great in you but I also fell in love with the bad you see in yourself, but the bad you see is the great that I see because I love every part of you”

You couldn’t believe the words that were coming out of his mouth, the look in his eyes showed he meant every single word. Resting your forehead against his you took a breath before pressing your lips against his.

This time he instantly responded, his lips moving in sync with yours as his arms wrapped around your waist pulling him closer, as you wrapped your arms around his neck. Pulling away you rested your forehead against his.

“You think we can make this work?” You whispered against his lips.

“I know we can darlin’ look I know things aren’t gonna be easy in my world of chaos but I am willing to do everything possible to make it work” he whispered “all you have to do is come home”

“Okay” you whispered smiling “take me home Teller”

“Later tonight, I want to spend the rest of the day here, just you and me”

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