#well bribery

[pratchettquotes]

"Well, if I can be of any help to the Times--"

"We won't be bribed, either," said William. He knew he was galloping in among the sharpened stakes here, but he'd be damned before he'd be patronized.

"Bribed?" said Vetinari. "My dear sir, seeing what you're capable of for nothing, I'd hesitate to press even a penny into your hand."

Terry Pratchett, The Truth

[rocketbirdie]

*enters my own password* "i'm in"

[katoska]

Theory why Betelgeuse left Lydia's side to "go to the little boys' room" and took over for Richard at his booth for a bit:

Yes, he could have dealt with Jeremy without playing dress-up and taking over Richard's job, and didn't have to enable Richy to get a little more family time in the process. They could have saved Astrid just fine without that, so it seems unnecessary, for him to do that. OOC, even. Except

2) Richard wouldn't owe Betelgeuse a big favor for said taking over of his job and enabling the extra family time with Lydia and Astrid. Also, ofc, for saving his daughter from trading places with Jeremy. Betelgeuse did all that at great cost to himself: A Code 699 violation (see screenshot of transcript from reddit below) gets you extra time working as a civil servant, it gets your topside privileges revoked, and it voids any marriage you entered into, so his contract for payment from/marriage to Lydia was meaningless (well, if it had been a marriage certificate rather than just an agreement to get married in the future. and if he'd actually signed it. and then possibly only if he'd signed it before entering the Netherworld so there'd be a marriage TO void, rather than... not signing it at all... *sigh* he totally burned that half-signed and not-yet-binding contract himself bc he understood she wasn't ready to marry him yet, is what I'm saying, but I digress).

1) Lydia wouldn't have gotten closure for her ex's death without it. Closure which she sorely needed, because the fact that Richard's body was never found plus her seeming inability to see his ghost (Richard: "I know you two can't see me, but I check in on you all the time") add up to her having been in denial of his death. She couldn't see his ghost because she really really did not want to see proof that he was dead. So now she gets to move on from him. Which is very convenient for B. Especially as Richard is unlikely to be able to visit her anytime soon even now that Lydia has accepted his death and should be able to see him again, but I'm getting to that.

Still 2): Anyway, B doesn't do favors. He does business. If people are allowed to take over for others at their jobs in the afterlife, but those jobs are also a form of punishment where you have to "do time" at them for a specific duration, then those work hours are a currency that you can give away or trade. You can, if you find someone who is willing, get someone to do your time for you (hell, you can even get a naive Breather to trade their actual Life for your afterlife existence).

So yeah, I don't think Betelgeuse took over Richard's booth just out of the goodness of his heart. I think they made a deal, one that means that B will be topside again much sooner than the Deetz' will expect so he can get back to trying to seduce Richard's ex (hey, Richard always supported lost causes, so... 😆), while Richard will be stuck at work, unable to visit the Living for a long and unspecified amount of time. Not that his family's gonna notice, bc they never used to see him visit them, anyway.

And yeah, according to someone from reddit who decyphered that page in the Handbook, there's a bit about how the Deceased who violated Code 699 has to cease Trading, if applicable.

But I think that only goes for post-conviction of the crime, not as an automatic consequence of the crime, as B was also still able to visit the Living World to attempt the church wedding. Which, actually, is yet more evidence that this latest marriage attempt was more for the sake of declaring his feelings and testing the waters (and showing off, and getting rid at the competition) than him trying to actually get, and stay, married. Cause the church wedding would have been voided by a conviction, too.

Anyway, that's my theory on B's incredibly considerate, and therefore incredibly suspicious, detour to Richard's booth and letting Richard have his heroic moment.

And tbf, Lydia and Astrid are Richard's family. So it wouldn't even be unreasonable to expect Richard to pay for the legal trouble B got into from saving them. Like, I'm sure he'd have done it anyway, but if B can pass on that buck then ofc he's gonna.

[stabbyfoxandrew]

Happy Wednesday, Aerie! I'm loving the Mer Roadtrip AU, you're an incredible writer <3 I can't wait to see Neil's daring escape. Angel Neil for this week, as always, and I hope it gives you less trouble this week. I'm slowly collecting more questions I come up with about the AU in a silly little text file, so one day I can send you another ask (yes, Angel Neil consumes my thoughts on occasion). I hope you have a lovely week (even if it sometimes feels hard to get anything done, there's always the next day, yk?)

WIP Wednesday (5/8) | Guardian Angel Neil AU (Part 185)

On Friday night, Andrew finds himself perched on the back of the couch waiting for everyone else to put the finishing touches on their atrocious costumes. Well, he and Kevin are already done, but Nicky is debating whether he should wear the eyepatch that came with his pirate-suit.

“I sincerely think it’s a bad idea,” Kevin says from beside Andrew. He is sitting on the couch the correct way, but looking over the back of it at Nicky. He looks completely normal, his ‘costume’ even worse than Andrew’s. And sure to be lost by the end of the night. “I mean, you’re driving.”

“I think he could get us there with it on,” Andrew says, grinning. “It would be a fun challenge for you.”

“No, Kevin’s right,” Nicky says, tossing the strip of fabric onto the counter. “Besides, it would mess up my makeup.”

“I can’t believe that’s the problem you have with it,” Kevin mutters. But Andrew understands Nicky’s concern. His eyeshadow actually looks sort of good, a lot of smoky black with a bit of orange glitter mixed in. Andrew doesn’t know makeup terms. He’s never worn it himself, except for a tiny bit of eyeliner he tried once in Cass’s bathroom. He scrubbed it off immediately after.

“I can’t believe your costume is a tiny piece of plastic in your pocket,” Nicky pouts.

Kevin sighs. “Why would I pay forty bucks for a shitty cape and a vial of fake blood when the plastic fangs suffice? It makes no sense to spend a lot of money for one night!”

“You’ll get married in an exy uniform, won’t you?” Nicky asks, shaking his head. The parrot pinned to his shoulder flops around a bit making the bird look drunk. “I mean, you’re almost as bad as Andrew over here.”

Andrew is offended. He would never get married in an exy anything. He wouldn’t get married, period.

“At least my costume is visible,” Andrew says, pointing to the top of his head where sits a headband with a couple of pokey little horns sticking out of his hair.

“Barely,” Nicky tuts. “You need a haircut, you can barely see them. Where’s the tail?”

“I am not wearing something that sticks off my ass. Ever. Especially not at Eden’s.” Andrew says, holding his hands up. “Kevin, would you like to borrow it?”

“No,” Kevin snaps. “The teeth are fine.”

[lixenn]

A mishap with a malfunctioning Ten Year Bazooka resulted in some de-aging shenanigans. After the Varia got sick of dealing with a grumpy baby Chief who was suspicous of everyone except Squalo they called in the big guns aka Marina lmao

Naturally Marina was delighted by this turn of events because pocket sized Dan is extra cute so she instantly proceeded to dress him up in all the cute onesies (taking lots of pictures for bribery purposes of course). She picked a shark onesie because Rina looooves teasing Squalo nearly as much as she loves teasing her brother after the two of them started dating.

reference

[frolis-maneuver]

Baby doll I recognize You're a hideous thing inside If ever there were a lucky kind it's You you you you [x]

sorry for being absent here been experiencing brainrot on a sideblog. can i interest you in some ocs perhaps

[dragonfire1000]

you cannot tell me Killer wouldn't do this

And Night certainly won't admit he likes it in a wierd way and he hates that .

Also a hypothetical scenario if nightmare still had the power of corruption but tamed it so that he didn't have to be caked up in goop 24/7 maybe flaring up if he got angry enough. Inspired by a drawing I saw of passive but with the tentacles and with killer just being killer. It was adorable.

[meiloorunsmoothie]

@tofangirlonly for you 😘😆

[day-night-darlix]

i think that yuki from idolish7 would be able to therapy aventurine by sheer bluntness, good food, and brute force

[mantisgodsdomain]

We actually got an advent calendar this year despite our lack of... celebrating christmas. It shall serve as a countdown to the end of quarter, and a bribe to make us keep doing things there. The struggle shall be, of course, not opening all doors immediately.

[tothepointofinsanity]

[With my five hundred ongoing diseases I’m prepared to just give the JPJ agent my worst shit eating grin as he speaks to me in fluent motherland and I suddenly forget how to start the car. I’ll probably depersonalise out of Reality while driving as well since that seems to be the case everytime I’m behind the wheel.]

[nostalgia-tblr]

u know... i view historical complaints about "favouritism" and "factionalism" with a lot of scepticism. it always seems to start with someone in the nobility who expects to be handed power and wealth not being in the in-group (how shocking!) and getting mad about it and protesting that of course they should be the one with influence over the monarch, it's what they deserve and some unnatural perversion of society and politics must be taking place if they aren't being given the best job by virtue of having been born. how dare the current monarch choose someone else! how dare they have gone with someone they liked more or thought was more skilled or were more eager to fuck?

i mean, to me this all seems really blatant but people still keep repeating it like it's definitely objective fact and not just whining from otherwise influential members of the nobility who find themselves temporarily unpopular. what's that about? is this another of those "yes i shall take what the rich and powerful say at face value" things? even when the writer is able to see through this nonsense at other times? it bothers me.

[thehallstara]

hi there's a little less than a day in the first round of the @blaseballshipbracket and i figured i should probably do a round up of what i've promised lmao so!!!

-if BOTH famous/scorpler and nerd/famous win their rounds i'll write a famous pov 12x100 that covers both relationships

-if nerd/famous wins i'll release a [redacted] fic about them that's been sitting in my drafts

-if haruta/bright wins i'll post EVERYTHING i have in my drafts with them

-likewise, if gitajayden win i will do the same

-if you vote for leon/andrew and show me i'll write a 100 word drabble of a player of your choice 🥰

am i gonna regret all this?? maybe!! tylandry and edric/dec/baby don't need the help rn but i do have stuff to offer if they make it through lmao

[weatheredcopper]

O_O

[pen-of-roses]

Uuuuuuughhhhhhhhhh

[wainswright]

The trial of Socrates took place over a nine-to-ten hour period in the People's Court, located in the agora, the civic center of Athens. The jury consisted of 500 male citizens over the age of thirty, chosen by lot from among volunteers. Athens used very large numbers of jurors, from 500 to as many as 1501, in part as a protection against bribes: who could afford to bribe 500 people? All jurors were required to swear by the gods of Zeus, Apollo, and Demeter the Heliastic Oath:

"I will cast my vote in consonance with the laws and decrees passed by the Assembly and by the Council, but, if there is no law, in consonance with my sense of what is most just, without favor or enmity. I will vote only on the matters raised in the charge, and I will listen impartially to the accusers and defenders alike."

Most of the jurors were probably farmers, as that was the principal occupation of the day. For their jury service they received payment of three obols. The jurors sat on wooden benches separated from spectators by some sort of barrier or railing. Given Socrates's fame and the notoriousness of the charge against him, the crowd of spectators was most likely large--including, of course, the most famous pupil of Socrates, Plato.

The trial began in the morning with the reading of the formal charges against Socrates by a herald. Few, if any, formal rules of evidence existed. The prosecution presented its case first. Meletus, Anytus, and Lycon had three hours, measured by a waterclock, to make their argument for a finding of guilt. Each accuser spoke from an elevated stage. No record of the prosecution's argument against Socrates survives.

Following the prosecution's case, Socrates had three hours to answer the charges. Although many written versions of the defense--or apology--of Socrates at one time circulated, only two have survived: one by Plato and another by Xenophon.

Following the arguments, the herald of the court called on the jurors to consider their decision. In Athens, jurors did not retire to a juryroom to deliberate--they made their decisions without discussion among themselves, based in large part on their own interpretations of the law. The 500 jurors voted on his guilt or innocence by dropping bronze ballot disks of the sort pictured above into marked urns. Only a majority vote was necessary for conviction. Four jurors were assigned the task of counting votes. In the case of Socrates, the jury found Socrates guilty on a relatively close vote of 280 to 220. (Interestingly, if less than 100 jurors voted for guilt, the accusers had to pay a fine to cover trial costs.)

If a defendant is convicted, the trial enters a second phase to set punishment. The prosecution and the defendant each propose a punishment and the jury chooses between the two punishment options presented to it. The range of possible punishments included death, imprisonment, loss of civil rights (i.e., the right to vote, the right to serve as a juror, the right to speak in the Assembly), exile, and fines. In the trial of Socrates, the principal accusers proposed the punishment of death. Socrates, if Plato's account is to be believed, proposed first the punishment--or, rather, the non-punishment--of free meals in the center of the city, then later the extremely modest fine of one mina of silver. Apparently finding Socrates' proposed punishment insultingly light, the jury voted for the prosecution's proposal of death by a larger margin than for conviction, 360 to 140.

The execution of Socrates was accomplished through the drinking of a cup of poison hemlock.

http://law2.umkc.edu/faculty/projects/ftrials/socrates/greekcrimpro.html#:~:text=Only%20a%20majority%20vote%20was,fine%20to%20cover%20trial%20costs.)

—

Checking later: “by what i think is just if no law exists” imply prosecution introduces the law, then the charge, then the facts, then the argument.

This implies defense only has ONE opportunity to rebut all of that. I’m guessing theres court procedure to settle question of law before trial, no discovery process, no witnesses, evidence like a circus sideshow and entertainment if opinions are published in town square.

The first vote is to decide the question of law, which I suppose is very vague if juries dont come back with their own chaotic decision. (a two option vote?? criminal trial emphasis even though it is called civil law? am i getting these mixed up or did athens?)

The second vote is punishment.

so: the first vote is actually “do you think this guy should get punished.”

and the system was so prone over the top comical brutality (just by how it looks set up) it was common for people to go “ope the 500 man jury went sideways lets rescue this little fella,” (i think) but socrates stubbornly took his death sentence despite everything.

also how come performance isnt an option for punishment. that doesn’t seem plausible.