#well as much as I can enjoy it when my emotions feel so muted

[alvinmichaelmurphyseville]

“Greetings, once again. It is I, Nerdy Alvin or Full-Nerd Alvin. I’m not sure what I’m calling myself.”

“I am delighted to inform you that one day of the 12 hour ADHD medication has helped me ace two quizzes and one big exam.”

“Computer Science class, meet my untapped genius. I am EXCELSIOR!”

“I shall miss this soon. It’s late and I can feel the effects fading. It shall feel nice to hyperfixate on random things again though. It’s impossible to do so while my brain is “Simonized.”

“I don’t know why I said I hate taking these things. They’re not so bad when I reassure myself the side effects I don’t enjoy are temporary.”

“I shan’t need them tomorrow. I’ll be back to short release ONLY IF my classes aren’t going well. It’s a pity. I hate to leave this (what’s the word I’m looking for?) significantly more competent and mature state of mind. But, the cycle continues. I must depart. Farewell.”

[pucksandpower]

Another Man’s Treasure

Max Verstappen x Reader + Charles Leclerc x ex!Reader

Summary: Charles made the worst mistake of his life when he threw away his relationship with you. Max … well he’s learned to take advantage of others’ mistakes both on and off the track

Warnings: cheating (not the main pairing) and pregnancy

“Please, Charles, why can’t we just talk about it?” you implore, the two of you standing on the balcony overlooking the glimmering lights of Monaco. The city shines brilliantly but your eyes are clouded with frustration and disappointment.

Charles exhales deeply, his jaw clenched as he avoids your gaze. The silver lining of the night —the glimmer of stars overhead — contrasts sharply with the tension between you two. “I told you already, it’s not the right time.

You take a shaky breath, trying to hold back tears. “Every time I bring up having children, you just push it away. Why can’t you see how much this means to me?”

Charles runs his fingers through his dark hair, exhaling slowly. “Look, it’s not that I don’t want to have a family with you someday,” he begins, his gaze distant. “But right now, with my career at its peak, I can’t risk distractions.”

“Distractions?” Your voice breaks, the hurt evident in your tone. “Our children would be a distraction?”

He flinches, clearly not expecting that response. “That’s not what I meant. I just … I need to focus on the championship. The pressure is immense. Racing is my life. Ferrari is my life.”

“I understand your dedication to your career, but ...” You pause, your gaze searching his. “Don’t you think we can find a balance? Am I not part of your life too?”

He looks at you, those hypnotizing eyes you’ve always loved flinching away from yours after no more than a second. “I wish I knew how,” he murmurs. “But every time I think of the late nights, the early mornings, the endless travels ... I’m afraid I won’t be there for our children.”

You reach out, holding his face in your hands. “We can figure it out together. But not if you keep shutting me out.”

Charles leans into your touch for a brief moment, his warmth radiating under your fingers. But then he pulls away, taking a deep breath. “I just need time,” he whispers.

“You always say that,” you reply, voice almost inaudible. The weight of the situation presses down on you both. The future, once so clear and bright, is now clouded in uncertainty.

But one thing is clear to you. You love Charles Leclerc. Despite the pain, the hurt, and the disagreements, you still believe that one day, you’ll both find common ground. So, you nod, taking his hand. “Alright, I’ll give you time. But please, don’t take too long.”

He looks at you with a mixture of gratitude and guilt. “Thank you,” he says, his voice thick with emotion.

But deep inside, a gnawing feeling of dread starts to grow, leaving you wondering if you’ve made the right choice.

***

The soft hum of the espresso machine at your favorite café in Monaco is the only thing that brings comfort these days. You take a deep breath, trying to enjoy the momentary solace as you sip on your coffee. But today, the calm is quickly disrupted by the muted buzz of your phone.

An unknown number flashes across the screen. Hesitating for only a moment, you decide to pick up. “Hello?”

A hesitant voice responds, “Is this ... is this you? I’ve seen you with Charles.”

Confused and on guard, you ask, “Who is this?”

The voice falters, “It’s Elise.”

You wrack your brain, trying to figure out who she might be. But before you can respond, Elise continues, “I think we need to meet. There’s something you should know.”

Agreeing to meet up, you find yourself waiting at the edge of the Fontvieille Park, the minutes feeling like hours as you try to decipher what could be so important.

Elise finally arrives, her demeanor nervous, eyes darting around. She’s visibly pregnant.

“I didn’t know how to tell you this,” she begins, looking down at her swollen belly, then up to your eyes, searching for understanding. “This is Charles’ child.”

The world seems to spin, the weight of her words pressing down on you. “What? How? Why?” The questions blur together, each one as painful as the last.

Elise sighs, taking a moment before she speaks, “We’ve been seeing each other for a while. I thought he loved me ... but then I found out about you.”

You’re at a loss for words, feeling a mix of betrayal, anger, and pain more complex than you can describe. The very foundation of your relationship with Charles feels like it’s crumbling beneath you. “He said he wasn’t ready for children,” you whisper, more to yourself than to Elise.

Elise looks genuinely pained. “I didn’t know. If I had, I would’ve never—” she stops herself, tears forming. “I’m so sorry. I thought you deserved to know the truth.”

The rest of the conversation is a blur. Elise shares her story, and you listen, trying to reconcile this new reality. The Charles she describes isn’t the man you thought you knew.

By the time you part ways, the Monaco sunset paints the sky in shades of gold and purple. But its beauty does little to lift the darkness that has settled over your heart. Charles had been unfaithful, and now a child — a constant reminder of his betrayal — was on the way.

***

With every step you take towards the apartment you share with Charles, your emotions churn and crash like tumultuous waves. You have practiced the confrontation in your mind countless times, yet as you reach the door, your hands tremble. Taking a moment to gather your courage, you push it open.

Inside, Charles looks up from the couch, surprised. “Hey, I wasn’t expecting you back so soon,” he starts, attempting a smile but his eyes give away a hint of nervousness. Perhaps he senses the storm brewing.

“We need to talk,” you say, your voice firm despite the turmoil inside.

Charles swallows hard, pushing himself up to stand. “About?”

“Elise,” you state simply, watching as his face pales.

He hesitates, and for a moment, you hope for an ounce of remorse, a hint of regret. But when he speaks, his words are cold and detached. “How did you find out?”

“Does it matter?” You shoot back, trying to hold back tears. “Is it true?”

Charles avoids your gaze, running a hand through his hair. “Yes,” he finally admits.

“And the baby? Is it yours?”

Again, he hesitates but then nods. “Yes.”

The weight of the revelation feels like a physical blow, and you stagger back slightly, gripping the back of a chair for support. “All those times … when you said you weren’t ready, that it wasn’t the right time …” Your voice cracks, pain and betrayal evident in every word.

Charles finally meets your gaze but there’s no warmth, no apology in his eyes. “I didn’t plan this,” he says but it’s not a justification, merely a statement.

“That’s supposed to make it better?” you scoff, voice rising in disbelief.

He sighs, rubbing the back of his neck, a gesture you recognize as one of discomfort. “I never wanted to hurt you. But things just ... happened.”

“You think that justifies anything? Things just happened?” You shake your head in disbelief. “I gave up so much for us, Charles. I moved away from everything and everyone I knew to be with you. And you threw it all away like it’s nothing.”

“I’m sorry,” he murmurs but his apology feels hollow. His eyes betray the truth.

The room is thick with tension and heartbreak. The man you loved, the life you envisioned — both seem like illusions now. You didn’t even know if they were ever real.

“You know what?” You say, a new determination rising within. “I deserve better. I deserve someone who truly values and respects me.” With that, you turn, making your way to the bedroom to pack a few essentials.

Charles doesn’t stop you. And that, more than anything, cements the truth. Your future lies elsewhere. The chapter with Charles is closed.

***

Rain begins to drizzle over Monaco, each droplet reflecting the city’s luminescence. With a bag slung over your shoulder and a broken heart, you wander aimlessly. The streets that once felt like home now seem foreign and cold.

As the rain intensifies, you duck under an awning, the gentle hum of a nearby bar providing a temporary reprieve. You’re lost in thought when a familiar voice breaks through, “Is everything okay? You look a bit ... lost.”

You look up, surprised to find Max Verstappen looking genuinely concerned. His bright blue eyes study your face, searching for an answer.

“Max ...” Your voice trails off, unsure of how much to reveal.

He gestures to the bar beside you. “Want to come in? We can talk or not. Up to you.”

Gratefully, you nod, and the two of you find a quiet corner. The dim lighting offers a cocoon of privacy, away from prying eyes.

Over a glass of wine, words start to tumble out. The betrayal, the heartbreak, the uncertainty of the future. Max listens intently, his gaze never leaving yours. His silence offers a comforting presence, allowing you to unburden your heavy heart.

“I can’t believe Charles would do that to you,” Max says after you finish your story, his voice laced with anger. “You deserve so much better.”

A tear slips down your cheek. “I thought we had something special. But I guess I was just naive. And stupid. So stupid.”

Max reaches out, gently wiping away the tear with his thumb. “No. He was the fool for not seeing what a treasure he had.”

The evening wears on and you find solace in Max’s company. The conversation shifts from heartbreak to hopes and dreams. He opens up about his childhood, the pressures of racing, and his aspirations for a family — one where he could offer his children a better upbringing than he had.

The connection between you two grows, the raw vulnerability drawing you closer than you could have ever anticipated over just a few hours.

“It’s getting late,” Max observes, glancing at his watch. “Do you have a place to stay tonight?”

You hesitate, realizing you hadn’t thought that far ahead. “I ... I hadn’t planned anything.”

Max looks thoughtful for a moment then says, “I have a penthouse not far from here. You’re more than welcome to stay. No expectations, just a place to rest.”

Gratitude swells within you. “Thank you, Max. I really appreciate that.”

The two of you leave the bar together, the rain now a soft drizzle. As you make your way to his place, the weight of the day begins to lift, replaced by an unexpected feeling of hope. You couldn’t have predicted this turn of events but perhaps, just maybe, the universe has a plan for you.

***

The penthouse apartment is a sanctuary, perched high above the city’s twinkling lights. The soft glow of lamps bathes the room in warmth, contrasting with the coolness of the floor-to-ceiling glass windows that offer an unobstructed view of Monaco’s beauty.

Max hands you a plush robe and gestures toward the bathroom. “Feel free to freshen up. I’ll make us some tea.”

You nod, grateful for his understanding and hospitality. The hot shower washes away the day’s troubles, and when you emerge, wrapped in the robe, you find Max in the sleek kitchen area, preparing mugs of tea.

“Here you go,” he says, handing you a steaming cup. “Chamomile. Good for relaxation.”

You take a sip, the warm liquid soothing your frayed nerves. “Thank you, Max. For everything. I don’t know what I would’ve done without you tonight.”

He smiles gently, his eyes meeting yours. “Sometimes, unexpected moments bring people together for a reason.”

The two of you settle onto a surprisingly comfortable leather couch, gazing out at the night sky. Silence envelops you but it’s a comfortable one.

“You know, I never expected to connect with someone like this,” Max says, his voice soft. “Especially not after what you’ve been through.”

You look at him, seeing a depth of sincerity that surprises you. “It’s been a strange and difficult day,” you admit. “But talking to you, it feels like a weight has been lifted.”

Max’s gaze holds yours, and for a moment, it feels like the universe has conspired to bring you to this very place, to this very person.

He takes a deep breath. “I’ve always wanted a big family. A loving home, something I didn’t really have growing up. I want to give my kids the stability and happiness I never had.”

Tears well up in your eyes, touched by his vulnerability and his willingness to share his dreams with you. “That’s a beautiful aspiration.”

He shifts closer, a comforting hand on your shoulder. “And what about you? What do you dream of?”

You lean back, contemplating the question. “I dream of a family too, a partner who’s truly invested, children who grow up knowing they’re loved and supported.”

Max's fingers brush against yours, a gentle touch that sends a shiver down your spine. “You deserve that. You deserve to find happiness.”

As the night deepens, the emotional intimacy between you grows. There’s an unspoken understanding, a shared connection, and for the first time in a long while, you feel a glimmer of hope for the future. The chapter with Charles might be closed, but perhaps, with Max, you can start to write a new one — one filled with shared dreams and the promise of a brighter tomorrow.

***

The morning sun casts a golden glow over Monaco as it begins its ascent into the azure sky. You wake up, wrapped in the softest sheets you’ve ever felt, with memories of last night’s conversation playing on a loop in your mind.

Exiting the bedroom, you find Max in the open-plan kitchen, whipping up a breakfast spread. “Good morning,” he greets with a warm smile. “I hope you’re hungry.”

As you eat, Max discusses his plans for the day, mentioning an upcoming summer break in the F1 calendar. “A few friends and I have organized a yacht trip during the summer shutdown. It’s a tradition,” he explains. “A way to escape and recharge.”

You nod, picturing the glittering sea and warm beaches. “That sounds wonderful.”

He hesitates for a moment, then, as if taking a leap, says, “Why don’t you join us? It could be a good distraction. Get away from all this ... chaos.”

The offer catches you by surprise. The prospect of a holiday is tempting, especially after the emotional whirlwind of the past few days. Plus, the idea of spending more time with Max, getting to know him outside the confines of Monaco, is equally appealing.

After a moment’s contemplation, you reply, “You know what? I think I will. Thank you so much.”

The days leading up to the trip are a blur, filled with shopping for swimsuits and sundresses and a growing sense of anticipation.

When the day finally arrives, you find yourself aboard a lavish yacht, surrounded by Max’s close friends. Laughter and conversations flow easily, the crystal-clear waters providing the perfect backdrop.

As the yacht sets sail, you and Max find a secluded spot on the deck. He wraps an arm around you, pulling you close. The two of you talk, laugh, and occasionally, just sit in silence, enjoying the tranquillity of the moment.

During a sun-soaked afternoon, Max teaches you how to steer the yacht. Your fingers brush against each other, and there are shared glances, stolen moments, and an electric charge between you that’s impossible to ignore.

Each day deepens the growing bond between you. There are sunrises watched from the deck, dinners under the stars, and long conversations that last into the early hours of the morning.

One night, as the yacht anchors near a secluded cove, Max takes your hand, leading you to a quiet spot. The moonlight dances on the water, creating a magical atmosphere.

“You know,” he begins, his voice soft, “this trip has been special. Not because of the destinations but because of the company.”

You smile, leaning into him. “I couldn’t agree more.”

A tender moment passes between you, one filled with promise and the potential for something more. The yacht trip might be coming to an end but both of you sense that this journey, this new chapter in your lives, has only just begun.

***

The gentle lull of the waves against the yacht rocks you as the moon hangs low in the sky. The night air is warm and fragrant, carrying with it a sense of peace. Tomorrow, the yacht will dock back in Monaco and reality will catch up with you once more. But for now, you’re content to savor these final moments of the trip.

You find Max leaning against the railing, gazing out at the sea. As you approach him, he turns, his expression softening into a smile. “Hey.”

“Hey,” you reply, standing beside him, your shoulders brushing against each other.

“I can’t believe the break is almost over,” Max muses, his voice carrying a hint of wistfulness.

You nod in agreement, casting your gaze out to the horizon. “It still feels like a dream.”

Max glances at you, his eyes holding a certain intensity. “You know, I’ve had an amazing time with you.”

A flutter of warmth ignites in your chest at his words. “Me too. The best time.”

The moment is charged with unspoken feelings, the connection between you growing stronger with each passing day. Max’s fingers brush against yours and the touch sends a shiver down your spine.

“I don’t want this to end,” he confesses, gaze never leaving yours.

You take a deep breath, your heart racing. “I’ve never felt so connected to someone, so understood.”

He cups your cheek with his hand, his touch tender and affectionate. “I feel the same way. And I don’t want this to end.”

The tension in the air is palpable, heavy with anticipation and longing. And then, as if drawn by an invisible force, your lips meet in a soft, tentative kiss. It’s a kiss filled with all the emotions that have been building between you, a kiss that bridges the gap between friendship and something more.

As the kiss deepens, Max’s arms wrap around you, pulling you closer. The world around you fades away, leaving only the two of you under the moonlit sky.

When you finally pull apart, your foreheads rest against each other, your breaths mingling. Max’s voice is a gentle murmur against your lips. “I don’t want to rush anything. But I also don’t want to pretend that this connection we have isn’t real.”

You meet his gaze, your eyes reflecting the same sincerity. “I don’t want to pretend either. Max, I want to give this — give us — a chance.”

A genuine smile graces Max’s lips and he kisses your forehead in reassurance. “Then let’s take it one step at a time.”

***

“Where to now?” Max asks, his hand lightly touching your arm as the yacht crew busies themselves with docking procedures.

You hesitate, the reality of your situation setting in. “I hadn’t thought that far ahead. I … I moved here from my home country to be with Charles.”

Max looks concerned. “You can’t stay with him, not after everything.”

“No, definitely not.” You exhale deeply, feeling the weight of the situation. “I’ll figure something out. Maybe find a hotel for a few days.”

Before you can say more, Max interjects, “Stay with me.”

You look at him, a bit taken aback. “Are you sure? We’re still navigating whatever this is between us.”

He nods, his gaze steady and sincere. “I know. But I also know you shouldn’t be alone right now. You can take the guest room or,” he pauses, a hint of mischief in his eyes, “the master bedroom, if you prefer.”

A blush creeps up your cheeks at his teasing tone but his offer feels genuine. “Alright but only if you promise not to snore.”

Max chuckles, wrapping an arm around your shoulder as the two of you head off the yacht. “Deal.”

The familiarity of Max’s penthouse greets you as you step inside. It's comforting and safe, an oasis to escape the shattered memories that line the Monaco streets.

While you unpack, Max makes dinner. The two of you eat in comfortable silence, the city lights casting a soft glow through the apartment.

“Thank you for this,” you say, gesturing around the dining room, the food, the moment. “It’s more than I could’ve ever asked for.”

Max meets your gaze, his blue eyes reflecting warmth and understanding. “You’re not alone in this. Whatever comes next, we’ll face it together.”

The night unfolds, a sense of peace settling between you. Whether it's the soft hum of the city below or the comforting presence of Max beside you, you drift into a deep, restful sleep.

Waking up the next morning, the events of the past weeks feel like a distant memory. But the man beside you, his arm wrapped protectively around your waist, is a calming reminder of new beginnings.

With Max by your side, you feel ready to face whatever challenges lie ahead, knowing that no matter what, you’re not alone.

***

“Are you ready for the madness?” Max asks, offering you a hand as you step out of the car, the roar of the crowd at Zandvoort Circuit immediately evident.

Taking a deep breath, you nod. “As ready as I’ll ever be.”

The two of you walk hand-in-hand towards the paddock, drawing attention from fans, crew, and media alike. Whispers spread like wildfire but neither of you flinch. Together, you are a united front.

Suddenly, Charles appears from around the corner, his gaze immediately locking onto yours. “So this is the big reveal?” he asks, dripping with condensing sarcasm.

Max steps protectively in front of you. “It’s none of your business anymore.”

Charles scoffs, his eyes darting to the Red Bull VIP pass around your neck. “Jumping ship already? You always were fickle.”

Ignoring the jab, you retort, “You lost any right to an opinion about my life the second you threw away our relationship.”

Charles’ eyes flare with anger. “And you,” he snaps, turning his attention to the reigning world champion, “you think you can just swoop in—”

Max cuts him off sharply, “I think you’ve said enough.”

“You two deserve each other,” Charles hisses before storming off.

Max wraps an arm around you, his touch reassuring. “Ignore him. Today is about the race, about us. Nothing else.”

You nod, taking a deep breath. “Thank you.”

The race itself is thrilling. From Red Bull garage, you watch as Max masterfully maneuvers his car, leading the pack with unparalleled skill. Every turn, every overtake steals your breath. And when he crosses the finish line, the roar of the crowd painting the grandstands orange is deafening.

As Max emerges from his car, he’s immediately surrounded by his team, celebrating yet another victory. And then, spotting you in the crowd, he breaks away, making a beeline towards you. Without a word, he pulls you into his arms, his lips meeting yours in a passionate kiss.

The world fades away, leaving just the two of you in this perfect moment. As you pull apart, Max’s eyes shine with triumph and love. “For you,” he murmurs, holding up the trophy.

Laughing, you pull him close once more. The challenges and confrontations of the day pale in comparison to the joy of this moment. Together, you and Max are unstoppable. And as you celebrate his victory, you know that this is just the beginning of many more triumphant moments to come.

***

The familiar sounds of roaring engines, the scent of burning rubber, and the vibrant energy of the paddock have been a part of your life for years. But being around the Red Bull team feels like a different world compared to your previous experiences with Ferrari.

Christian Horner welcomes you with open arms. “It’s great to have you on board,” he says during a quiet moment in the Red Bull motorhome. “Max seems happier than he’s been in a long time.”

You smile, thinking of the nights spent laughing with Max, the whispered conversations, and reflected dreams. “I’m grateful to be here. And to be with Max.”

Helmut Marko, although initially intimidating with his sharp gaze, soon warms up to you. “Just take care of our champ,” he jokes one evening after another successful race.

As the weeks pass, the bond between you and the Red Bull team strengthens. Daniel Ricciardo becomes a close friend, often joining you and Max for dinner or movie nights. Sergio Perez, with his playful humor, keeps everyone laughing, while the mechanics and engineers teach you the deeper intricacies of the sport.

Yet, it’s not all smooth sailing. The media, always hungry for a story, constantly probes into your relationship with Max. Rumors swirl, some true, most fabricated. Yet, through it all, Max remains your anchor, always supporting and defending you.

One evening, as the two of you relax in his suite after a grueling race weekend, Max turns to you, his eyes serious. “I know this world can be intense, the scrutiny constant. But I hope you know that you’re not alone in this.”

You nod, feeling a swell of emotion. “Being with you, being part of this team, it’s incredible. Like finding a family I never knew I needed.”

Max smiles, pulling you close. “That’s because you are family. And I promise, no matter what, we’ll face everyone and everything together.”

The season progresses, and as Max inches closer to clinching the championship title once again, the excitement within the Red Bull team reaches a fever pitch. Through every high and low, every victory and setback, you stand beside Max, cheering him on.

***

“Easy there!” Christian says, catching you just as the world starts to spin and your vision blurs.

The sound of concerned voices surrounds you as you struggle to stay conscious but it’s too much. Everything goes black.

When you come to, you’re lying on a couch in Red Bull hospitality, Max’s anxious face hovering above yours. “Hey,” he murmurs, relief evident in his voice. “You scared me there.”

“What ... what happened?” you ask, your voice weak.

“You fainted,” Daniel chimes in from nearby. “We’re getting a doctor to check on you.”

True to his word, a doctor soon arrives, performing a series of tests and asking various questions. He recommends a more thorough examination and you find yourself being whisked away to a nearby clinic.

As you await the results, Max holds your hand, his thumb gently stroking your skin. “I’m right here,” he assures you. “Whatever it is, we’ll get through it together.”

The doctor returns, a knowing smile on his face. “Congratulations,” he says, looking at both of you. “You’re going to be parents.”

The room goes silent, the weight of the revelation sinking in. You turn to Max, searching his face for a reaction. “I’m sorry. I ... I didn’t expect this. It’s so soon.”

Max pulls you close, his eyes glassy with tears of joy. “Life has a funny way of surprising us,” he murmurs. “But I know one thing for sure. I can’t imagine having a family with anyone else.”

Your emotions swirl, a mix of surprise, joy, and fear. “Are you sure? What about your career? The media?”

Max silences you with a gentle kiss. “None of that matters. The only thing I care about is us. Our family.”

Tears roll down your cheeks, touched by his words. “I love you,” you whisper, heart full to overflowing.

Max grins, his blue eyes shining. “And I love you. This might be unexpected but it’s the best surprise of my life.”

***

“Three-time World Champion! How does that feel?” A journalist thrusts a microphone towards Max moments after his astounding win in Qatar.

“It’s surreal,” Max responds, his gaze seeking you out among the crowd. “Every championship is special but this one ... it’s different.”

The winter months are a haven of privacy for the two of you in your own little bubble. As the world speculates about the upcoming racing season, you and Max nest away from prying eyes, savoring the anticipation of your growing family.

However, when the 2024 season kicks off, it’s impossible to hide your baby bump any longer. Whispers ripple through the crowd as you walk through the paddock with Max for the first day of preseason testing.

“It’s so obvious now!”

“They look so happy together.”

“She’s glowing.”

But one voice rises above the rest from the sea of murmurs, filled with venom. “So this is your grand plan? Trap Max by getting pregnant?”

You turn to find Charles, his face contorted with anger. You take a deep breath, preparing to face the storm. “Charles, this really isn’t the place—”

Max steps forward, partially blocking you from Charles’ view, his voice colder than ice. “What do you want?”

Charles scoffs, looking you up and down with disdain. “Just wanted to see the spectacle for myself. You always did know how to play the game.”

Max’s eyes flash with anger, his posture tense. “Let me make this clear. You don’t get to disrespect Y/N or our relationship. You lost that right a long time ago.”

“You think this will make him stay with you?” Charles sneers towards you. “That he won’t get tired of you just like he did with all the others?”

Before you can respond, Daniel steps in, his presence commanding and the joking smile that usually graces his face nowhere to be found. “Enough. Show some respect.”

Christian, overhearing the commotion, joins the fray. “Is there a problem here?” he asks, voice firm.

Charles hesitates, glancing around at the united front against him. “No,” he finally mutters, turning on his heel and walking away.

Max’s grip on your hand tightens, his expression stormy. “You know you’re never alone in this, right?” he asks.

You nod, your voice soft but resolute. “I do. And I know you’ll always have my back. Just like I’ll always have yours.”

He squeezes your hand. “Always. Nothing and no one can ever come between us. Our family is the most important thing in my life.”

***

The soft hum of chatter surrounds the preschool’s main entrance. Parents eagerly await their children, discussing the excitement of the first day. You stand beside Max, his hand resting protectively on your protruding belly.

“Look, Mama!” A little voice exclaims and two giggling children rush towards you — your daughter, Sophie, and a boy with familiar dark hair.

Before you can respond, another voice joins the fray. “Henri! Over here!”

You turn, finding Charles standing there, Elise by his side, her arm entwined with his. Their eyes meet yours, a mixture of surprise and recognition.

Sophie hugs her little friend, Henri. “This is my new best friend!”

Max bends down, ruffling Sophie’s hair. “That’s great, liefje.” He then stands and addresses Charles, his tone neutral, “Seems our children have taken a liking to each other.”

Charles nods, attempting a smile. “It appears so.”

There’s an awkward silence, the past hanging heavily between you all.

Finally, Elise speaks, her voice quivering, “I’m sorry ... for everything. I never expected things to turn out like this.”

You meet her gaze, seeing genuine remorse. “Life is full of surprises. But it led me to Max and he is the best thing that’s ever been mine.”

Max adds, “What’s important is that we’re all here for our kids. Let’s not make our past their burden.”

Charles sighs, rubbing his temples. “You’re right. I regret many things but right now, Henri is my world and I want the best for him.”

You place a hand on your belly, feeling the tiny kicks. “Our children have a chance at a fresh start, a friendship untainted by the history of their parents. Let’s not stand in their way.”

The two children, oblivious to the emotional weight of the moment, tug at your arms. “Can we go to the park? Pretty please.” Sophie asks, her eyes shining with excitement.

You smile down at her, “Of course.”

As your two families part ways, there’s a sense of closure. The past, with its pain and betrayal, has been acknowledged, but the future, the innocent laughter of your children, holds promise. Life has moved on, leading each of you down different paths, but in this moment, there’s newfound unity in the shared hope for a brighter tomorrow.

[dancingtotuyo]

Part III

High Infidelity | Joel Miller X Female Reader

Rating: Mature/Explicit

Summary: You and Joel hull the kids to the beach for a much needed vacation. Things begin to change.

Tags: Tommy x Reader, Joel x Reader, Tommy's Wife Reader, infidelity, emotional affair, slow burn (as much as you can get for 5 chapters), Tommy goes to jail, Reader has had a child

Warnings: Tommy being a shitty husband & father, Father's day celebration, cursing, consumption of alcohol, emotional affair/cheating, some physical boundaries crossed. Pining

Notes: Y'all know the drill by now, thanks to my loves @janaispunk for beta reading and @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin for beta reading and providing me with some authentic prison information and inspiration, and @saradika-graphics for the dividers!

Words: 5273

Series Masterlist | Author Masterlist | Daily Clicks for Palestine & Other resources

It’s June before you’re able to escape to the shore. You make it in just over 4 hours. It’s good timing considering the multiple bathroom stops you had to make. It’s a small house that probably hasn’t been renovated since Joel was there as a kid. It sits two blocks off the shore on stilts that make you feel secluded from the people that pass on the quiet street below, and when you stand on the porch, the salty sea breeze caresses your body as you let your eyes close. You can just make out the crash of ocean waves. You can feel the breeze carrying all your cares away.  

Nate and Sarah excitedly explore the inside of the house. Their muted enthusiasm floating through the walls makes you smile. You’re thankful for this, thankful for Joel.  

The sliding door opens and then shuts. You don’t move. It’s Joel. You know the sound of his footsteps, the way he moves through the world by heart. He settles against the railing, arm pressed against yours. 

A smile spreads across your lips as your eyes open, landing on his. He smiles back. “Hard to enjoy the view with your eyes closed, Darlin.” His deep baritone rumbles smoothly. You see it in him too, the way the breeze carries away the wear and worry of the world. 

“It’s peaceful out here.” 

He nods. “Yeah, it is.”

“We should probably get back in there before the kids break something.”

Joel nudges you with his shoulder. “Don’t jinx us like that.”

“Our two? Unsupervised? That’s asking for it.”

“Our two?” A playful glint glimmers in Joel’s deep brown eyes. “My daughter is perfectly well behaved. It’s your little menace that’s the bad influence.”

“Oh my four year old is the bad influence?” You cross your arms, doing your best to keep the smile at bay. 

“For sure- got his dad’s streak for mischief. My Sarah is a perfect angel.” He sticks his tongue out at you. 

You roll your eyes, slapping his shoulder, but you don’t have a good response. He’s not wrong. Nathaniel knows how to get into places he shouldn’t. “I seem to recall an incident involving a ten pound bag of flour that says differently.”

Joel chuckles at the memory. Nathaniel was barely a week old when Sarah shrieked in the kitchen only for you to find her and the kitchen dusted in white powder. You had cried upon seeing it, postpartum hormones raging. Joel had cleaned your entire kitchen top to bottom. 

“She felt so bad for making you cry,” Joel laughs. 

“I think I scared her.”

The door opens again. Sarah and Nathaniel break out, rushing for your legs and begging to go to the beach. 

You spend the next several days lazing on the sand, reading more than you have in years as you soak in the sun. The kids run around chasing seagulls and other creatures. Joel helps them catch waves on boogie boards. You both take them further out to ride the waves. Sarah’s arms clutch around Joel’s neck, and Nathaniel does the same to you. They build sandcastles and Joel digs holes big enough to bury them both. 

At night, the kids are out by 8 o’clock if not earlier allowing you and Joel to sit out on the deck and drink. Your skin is warm from the constant sun. Joel’s cheeks are tinged pink on your third evening, his chest rosier. The salty air works at his hair, bringing out curls. You like this version of him a lot. You like this version of yourself too. 

Your feet sit in his lap as he massages your legs and feet, calves worn out from lugging your belongings across the sand and back. He stares up at the sky, twilight bringing the first few stars with it. You sip your homemade margarita, Joel’s specialty, from a red solo cup. 

“I shoulda brought my guitar. Only thing that could make this moment better,” he says. 

You hum softly, shifting in your chair. “Wouldn’t be able to massage my feet if you had your guitar.”

He laughs, so easy, so relaxed. You can’t remember the last time things felt this good. “Don’t worry, you’d still get your massage.”

“Why didn’t you bring it?” You cock your head to the side. 

“Wouldn’t fit in the car, miss over packer.”

You roll your eyes softly kicking at him. “We’ve used everything I packed. Speaking of which, what do you want for breakfast tomorrow?” You take another sip of your drink. Joel finds a knot in your calf, working it out as you let out a slight hiss. 

Joel shrugs, carefully watching your reactions careful to inflict as little pain as possible. “Ask the kids.”

“It’s Father’s Day.”

“Kids like pancakes.” Joel sips from his own drink before returning to the knot.

“But you don’t.”

“Doesn’t matter what I like, Darlin.”

“Well, it does tomorrow.” You cross your arms. 

Joel sighs rolling his eyes. 

You narrow yours. “Don’t make me force it out of you. You know I will.”

He considers it a minute before deciding it’s a losing battle. “Those omelets you made for my birthday. I really liked those.”

You smile. “I can manage that.”

You sit in bed with Nathaniel the next morning to call Tommy. As early as possible is preferred, not that Tommy will care. He’s been blowing you off more, hardly talking when you call or visit, seemingly uninterested when you talk about Nate. It’s exhausting. You dread it, but you continue anyway. 

It takes a while before Tommy’s voice comes through the speaker. You force an exaggerated smile to your face for Nathaniel’s sake. Daddy is an abstract being to him. “Hey babe. Happy Father’s Day!”

“Oh… that’s today?”

You push back the annoyance rising inside you. “Nate wants to say hello.” You hold the phone up to your four-year-old’s ear.

“Hello?” he says. 

You can barely make Tommy’s pathetic response. He won’t even pretend for Nathaniel and that’s the unbearable part of all this. 

“Happy Day!” Nathaniel says, taking hold of the receiver before he dives into updating his stranger of a father all about their beach vacation. Tommy stays quiet the whole time. 

Rage begins to boil just under the surface. Before it can bubble over, Nathaniel says goodbye, shoving the phone into your chest and dashing out of the room the moment he hears Sarah moving around in the living room. 

“Tommy?”

“Look, I need to go.”

You're not sure what’s worse. The hurt or the anger inside you. “I love you.”

“Yeah. I’ll talk to you on Friday.”

“Tommy.” It sounds like a scold. That’s exactly what it is.

“I don’t have time for this.”

“Time for your wife and son?”

“You’re the one who called me.”

“Are you actually going to call on Friday? Or am I gonna end up sitting next to the phone all evening?”

You get silence. 

“Tommy?”

“I’ll call.” And then the line goes dead.

You want to scream or yell or cry or all three. You settle for throwing a pillow across the room and giving yourself 5 minutes to cry. There may only be three months of this left, but you’re not sure you’ll actually be talking to your husband at the end of it, not that the two of you do any talking now. 

Wiping your eyes, you make your way to the kitchen to start on Joel’s promised breakfast. Nathaniel and Sarah sit at the table comparing sea shells. “Aunt Bonnie?”

“Yes baby doll?” You smile, kissing her head. 

“Which one would Daddy like on his card?” She points to a collection of about 5 shells. 

“Hmmm,” you crouch down to her level, looking them over. “I think he would like any of them, but this one looks like him.” You point to a blue-grey shell. 

She picks it up, inspecting it carefully. “It does look kinda grumpy like him.”

You laugh. That isn’t what you meant, but she wasn’t wrong. “I’m making omelets. What do y’all want in yours?”

The kids are digging into their breakfast when Joel walks out of his room, arms stretching above his head to reveal a little sliver of his tummy. Sarah quickly shoves her Father’s Day project under some magazines. 

“Look who decided to wake up.” You smile over your shoulder. “Morning sleepy head.”

“One day of the year I get to sleep in.” He mumbles, shooting a teasing glare your way. He clocks your red eyes before you can turn away. 

“Happy Father’s Day, Daddy!” Sarah yells, standing on her chair to give Joel a hug. He chuckles, pulling her into his arms, spinning around, and setting her back on the chair with ease. She laughs.

“Thank you, baby girl.”

“Happy Day!” Nathaniel grins at his uncle.

“Father’s Day.” Sarah corrects. Nathaniel simply shrugs like he’d said the correct thing to begin with.

Joel chuckles, kissing his nephew’s cheek. “Thanks, Bud.”

You track his footsteps over to your side of the kitchen as you invest your full attention on the omelet in front of you. You know he caught your tear-stained eyes. “Fresh coffee in the pot,” You say, keeping your voice even. 

You feel his full body heat behind you, a hand falls to your waist as he reaches into the cabinet next to the stove for a coffee mug. Something settles in your stomach. 

“What did my idiot brother do now?” He keeps his voice low so the kids don’t overhear. 

You shake your head. “It doesn’t matter.”

“Darlin.”

“I don't want to talk about it.” Your head snaps toward him. He’s right there, face so close to yours. Always nearby. 

“You sure?”

You bristle a little bit. He drops his hand but stays in your space. “Not right now. We’re celebrating you this morning.” He smiles softly at you. “And I don’t want to burn your omelet, so scram.” You cock your head to the side. 

He waits a second, searching for any signs he’s missing something. When he’s sure he isn’t, he gives you a soft smile and a tender kiss on the forehead, and steps over to the coffee pot, leaving you feeling warm and hazy. 

The kids help clean up after breakfast. Sarah stands on a bench at the sink to wash dishes and Nathaniel waits patiently with a dish towel to dry the lighter dishes. You and Joel sit at the table, second and third cups of coffee in hand as you oversee their efforts. 

“I think I’m going to enjoy this next phase of parenting,” Joel says with a long, content sigh. 

You feel the easiness thrumming in your veins. Why couldn’t life always be this way? “Yeah if my anxiety about broken dishes or wet feet doesn’t get the better of me first.”

He chuckles softly, sipping from his mug as an easy silence falls between you. You watch the kids and Joel watches you. Sun pours through the many windows of the beach house. You’re not ready to leave tomorrow. 

“You wanna talk about it now?”

You sigh. “Not really. We’re supposed to be celebrating you today.”

“I’ll be able to enjoy myself more if I know what’s going on in your head.”

You keep your gaze focused on the kids, rolling the words around in your head. You feel emotionally exhausted by it all and you’re not even through the morning hours yet. 

“Darlin,” Joel kicks at your foot, smile on his face. “C’mon. We can talk about it.”

You set your mug down, turning toward him. “He’s just blowing us off again. I spent more time waiting for him to come to the phone than I did talking to him. He hardly interacted with Nate this morning.” You roll your eyes in an attempt to push away the tears pressing to escape. 

Joel reaches across the table, taking your hand. He runs his thumb over your knuckles. It grazes past your wedding band, almost taunting you now. 

“I’m sorry. This isn’t fair to either of you,” Joel says.

“You’d think I’d stop letting it affect me at some point.”

Joel bites his lip, eyes pinned to your ring finger. “He’s your husband. Needs to start acting like it,” Joel says gruffly. You catch the spark of something in his deep brown eyes, but you don’t have time to place it.

“We’re done!” Sarah exclaims with a proud smile, her shirt soaked through. 

You pull your hand from Joel’s, wrapping it around your warm mug as you laugh. “Thank you for your help. Both of you.” Nathaniel puts the dish towel carefully over the oven handle, shooting you the biggest grin.  

“Can we do presents now?” Sarah asks, curls bouncing with her. 

“Presents?” Joel says. “Y’all didn’t have to get me anything.”

“Don’t be silly, Daddy.” Sarah says, looking to you for permission. 

“I think now is a great time for gifts.”

Both kids run toward their shared room. They had been very excited at the promise of bunk beds. You ease out of your chair. “Not you too.” Joel shakes his head.

You shoot him a wink. “Suck it, Miller.” 

Flashes of your delayed Mother’s Day celebration jump between you. Joel had switched up the weekends and hadn’t been prepared, but had made up for it the following weekend. You hadn’t heard from Tommy. He never even mentioned it. 

You grab the small box from your suitcase, a small white bow tied around it. The four of you settle in the living room. You sit tucked into one end of the sofa while Joel sits at the other end, a bouncing kid on either side of him. 

“Me first!” Sarah says, handing her card and hand-wrapped gift to her father. 

Joel takes care, slowly reading the card out loud. His gift consists of a souvenir snow globe and a puca shell necklace. She picked them out with great care at the beach shop the two of you stopped in yesterday. He oos and awes over both. 

“You should put on the necklace!” Sarah says, standing up on the cushions of the couch.

“Maybe I want to admire it more,” Joel says. 

You bite back a smile. He’s already lost this battle and you both know it. 

“Don’t be silly, Daddy.” She grabs it from his hand, determination, and concentration painted on her face as she wraps it around his neck.

“Yeah, don’t be silly, Daddy.” You tease, shooting him a wink. He pokes his tongue out at you as Sarah almost chokes him in the process of securing the necklace. 

“Not so tight, baby girl.” 

“Oops,” she giggles. “All done.” 

She steps back to admire her handiwork, looking quite pleased. “What do you think, Aunt Bonnie?”

“Beautiful,” You smile, laughter evident in your tone of voice. “You look ready to hit the beach.”

“My turn!” Nathaniel announces, handing Joel a hand-drawn picture depicting their day at the beach yesterday. He goes into great detail describing everything he drew. Joel’s hand rests on Nate’s shoulder blades, head tucked toward him as he takes in everything the boy says with practiced patience and intentionality. 

It strikes something in your heart, a deep longing. That should be Tommy. But it also sends a deep sense of gratitude toward your brother-in-law for picking up where his brother has failed. You swallow back the tears, losing track of how much you’ve had to do that today.

“Thank you, Bud. I love it.” Joel kisses Nathaniel's head. 

“You’re welcome, Daddy.” 

Joel freezes. Ice rushes through your bloodstream. Your eyes meet Joel’s. What do you say to that? Neither of you knows the answer. 

“He’s not your daddy, Nate,” Sarah says, pulling out her older sister voice. “He’s your uncle.” 

“Oh yeah,” Nathaniel shrugs, unbothered by his mishap as he swings his legs back and forth, hitting the couch with his heels as he does.

“Aunt Bonnie, do you have the other gift?” Sarah asks, determined to keep the morning on schedule. 

“Yeah, right here.” You fumble around, finding the box tucked between yourself and the couch. Joel keeps his eyes on you trying to figure out what’s running through your mind, but he can’t. 

Sarah plucks the box from your hands before presenting it to her father. “This is from all three of us.”

She looks very proud of herself. Joel takes it with a smile, eyes flickering back to you briefly. You give him an encouraging nod. 

He loosens the bow, pulling off the top. The kids lean over either side of his body, excited for the reveal even though they’ve both seen it. He pulls it out, inspecting it carefully. A black watch face with silver accents and an olive green watch band. His eyes dart to yours. You smile at him. 

“You’ve been talking about it for years.” You smirk, sipping your coffee. “You were never gonna do it yourself.”

“It’s exactly what I wanted.” He shakes his head, a stunned chuckle shaking his chest. “How’d you know?”

“Found an old picture Tommy had stored away last fall.”

“Look at the back.” Sarah bounces with excitement. 

Joel flips it over. His brows knit together as he catches the inscription. Happy Father’s Day. We love you. Sarah and Nathaniel. 1997.

“Do you like it?” Sarah looks up at him with sparkling excitement. 

“I love it.” He kisses her cheek, thanking both the children. He wraps it around his wrist, buckling it into place. 

“Now you won’t be late anymore,” Sarah says, making you and Joel laugh. 

“We can only hope,” you say. 

Joel looks up at you with one of the most heartfelt smiles you’ve ever seen. His lips move silently. Thank you.

You nod in response. 

You spend the final day of your vacation on the beach until the sun has disappeared. Joel ends up running back to the house to grab the car so your two very tired children don’t melt down. You hurry through bath time, trying to get all the sand from hair and bodies. You’re sure you’ll be finding sand all over your and Joel’s homes for months. 

You provide goodnight hugs and kisses, but Joel takes bedtime duties. You’re cleaning up the kitchen, and packing up pantry items when the first lines of You Are My Sunshine drift out of the kid’s bedroom in Joel’s soft melodies. The kids' sleepy voices talk him into another lullaby and then another before their eyelids slip closed and their breathing evens out. 

The door clicks softly and you’ve already pulled the margarita pitcher and new solo cups. “See they talked you into the whole set list tonight.” You smile, filling the cups with the last of the margaritas. 

“It’s the last night of vacation.” Joel chuckles. He grabs the blanket off the back of the couch and the half-eaten bag of pretzels. “They asked so nicely.”

“And you’re a big softy.” 

You grab both cups, following Joel out to your spot on the deck. It’s cooler tonight, the breeze a bit stronger. You sit across from each other, feet propped in the seat of the other’s chair with the blanket spread across your legs. Joel sets the pretzels right at your knees. 

“Did you enjoy your day?” You ask, sipping on the day-old margarita. It goes down easier tonight, and your cup is filled to the brim.

“It was a good day.” Joel smiles at you, easy and relaxed. The world and your issues feel so far away here despite the day’s earlier events. “Probably the best Father’s Day yet.”

“Oh you mean it beats the raw banana bread from last year?” You’re laughing before the sentence fully leaves your mouth. Joel’s head falls back, chest vibrating with laughter. 

His hair curls more from the salty air and fits him, tanned skin, curly hair, Puca shell necklace and all. You wonder if you look like a similar version of yourself, the relaxed beach version. 

“Sarah trying to choke me with the necklace beats whatever it was you tried to bake last year.”

You stick out your tongue. The pretzel bag rustles as he grabs a handful. You take another drink from your cup. Joel Miller makes a mean margarita. 

“What about you? Did you have a good day then?”

You take an extra second to think about it before nodding. “Yeah. I can’t complain when it comes to well-behaved kids and the beach.”

“Nathaniel calling me dad didn’t throw you off, I hope.”

Your shoulders tense a little bit. “I think I’m the one who should be asking that.” 

“Kinda surprised it hasn’t happened sooner if I’m being honest.” Joel’s pointer finger slides along the lip of his cup before he brings it to his lips. 

You bite your lips, staring at the house across the street. “Same.” 

“Sorry, that was kinda a mood killer.” Joel’s hand rests on your calf. 

“It’s fine. You’re more of a father to him than his real dad.” You try to wave it off, but the facts are reeling in your mind like a movie. “Fuck, you were in the delivery room, and coached his T-ball team, and you’ve tucked him into bed more times than Tommy ever has.” You swipe away the moisture that’s gathered in your eyes, chasing them with another gulp of your drink. 

“Hey… maybe you should slow down there.” Joel leans forward, his feet dropping from your chair as he grabs the solo cup from you and the pretzels tumble to the deck. 

“I don’t think that’s necessary.” You reach for the cup, but Joel keeps it out of reach, setting it on the ground next to his. 

“I do.” He’s firm with you, grabbing your hands and tucking them between his. You can’t meet his eyes, embarrassment flooding your body. “What's going on in your mind right now?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Darlin,” He tugs gently on your arms. Your feet greet the warm deck as you're forced to sit up straighter. The side of your knee bumps against his. “You can talk to me.”

“I just want to enjoy our last night, Joel.”

“Can’t do that if I’m worried about you.” He tips your chin up, forcing you to meet his eyes. 

The street lights flicker off his warm eyes. You feel his touch linger under your chin. Extra warmth gathers in each place he touches. The words bubbling up in you, helpless to stop the thoughts circling in your head for months. 

“I’m not sure my marriage is salvageable. I don’t know if I’ll recognize my husband when he gets out. I don’t think he’s the same person-“ You can’t finish through the choked-out sobs. 

Joel lets out a soft sigh and before you know it, he’s tugging your pliant body into his lap, rubbing your back. He kisses your head. Your head finds the crook of his neck, fingers digging into the back of it. He’s the steady rock he’s always been. It does little to soothe your racing mind. 

You have so many questions and no answers. Tommy’s release from prison always felt like a distant finish line. Now, three months away, it feels like just the start. 

“No matter what, I’ve got you,” Joel says, hand cupping your cheek. “I’m here for you.”

How much longer can you continue to find solace in your brother-in-law's arms? How much longer will Joel play the part Tommy is supposed to? Supporter, parent, partner…

You pull back, fingers still wrapped around his neck. The metal of your wedding ring presses against his skin, but he’s used to feeling it. He doesn’t even think about it anymore. Your forehead nearly touches his. The pools of his deep eyes are endless. They’re different than Tommy’s. You don’t mean to compare, but you like it, soft and inviting after sleeping on rocks for years. You think you catch the hints of desire in them. You’ve forgotten what it feels like to be desired. 

There’s a fight, a push and pull between you. Who’s going to do it. His hot breath fans across your lips. Who’s going to be the one to finally cross the line you’ve been toeing for so long and drag the other one into exile with them? It’s a lush oasis in the middle of the desert you’ve been traveling. One move and you can dip your toe in. 

Joel gives in first, leaning in. Your eyes flutter shut with anticipation, another touch of his breath. His nose nudges against yours. You catch a whiff of the salt on his skin, and then, nothing, a mirage all in your head leaving you stranded in the desert. 

Confusion knits your brow before your eyes are open. Joel is still close, closer than a man that’s not your husband should be, but he feels further away than ever. 

His thumb nudges your bottom lip. He gives a weak smile in an attempt to cover his true emotions. “We can’t…”

He’s right. You hate yourself for getting so carried away. “I know.” 

Your hand drops from his neck. You might be sitting on his lap but he’s never felt farther from you. 

“You should go to bed.”

You think to fight him on it, but you decide not to. You stand up. Joel doesn’t move, thumb playing with the lip of his solo cup. He can’t meet your eyes and it feels like you might be losing him too. 

Before you can think better of it, you lean down, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek. Your fingers rake through his hair twice over. His eyes close and he lilts into you just the slightest. 

“Thank you, Joel. For everything.”

His Adam’s Apple bobs as you pull away. He keeps his eyes pinned ahead, fingers curling around the red plastic. He’s barely holding on to control. 

“Good night,” he says, voice gruff, never looking away from his fixed point. 

“Goodnight.”

Joel finishes off yours and his margarita before he falls into bed. It’s just enough to keep him buzzed as he runs toward rest. He can’t get the feel of you out of his mind, how close he was to ripping apart his whole family. 

He’s in and out of sleep when the door pops open. He assumes it’s Sarah. She probably had a bad dream, and tosses the corner of the comforter back. Except, the full size mattress dips lower than it should. He reaches out but instead of Sarah’s small frame, he gets a handful of your waist as the smell of you fills his nostrils. In the haze of sleep, Joel opens his eyes just enough to find you facing away from him. 

The bed isn’t big enough for his legs not to tangle with yours, not if he wants restful sleep. Your body doesn’t tense under his touch. You don’t say anything. Neither does he, but your body melts into him until he finds his arm fully around your middle, back flush against his front.

Joel Miller considers himself a good man, but a good man doesn’t yearn for his brother’s wife. A good man doesn’t give into the temptation to have her so close, to be with her so intimately. Tonight, Joel Miller doesn’t worry about being a good man. Maybe it’s the alcohol, but tonight, Joel Miller falls asleep with you in his arms and bed. Tonight, Joel Miller’s deepest desires come true. Just for tonight, he gets to pretend you’re his. 

You wake up to an empty bed like you have since Tommy went to prison, but something feels off about it. A familiar smell lingers under your nose, and unfamiliar warmth fills you even though the sheets are cold.

You let out a soft groan, eyes fluttering open. You stare up at the ceiling, convinced once again that something feels off. You turn to look at the clock on the bed stand but there’s not one there. The walls are a different color and you shoot up as it all comes flooding back. 

You almost kissed Joel last night. The way you tossed and turned before giving into temptation and crawling in beside him. He hadn’t fought you, hadn’t said a word but pulled you flush against him in the bed that was just a bit too small. You’d slept like a baby for the first time in years. 

Joel sits at the table with the kids as they shovel the last of the extra sugary cereal into their mouths. A special vacation treat. You expect Joel to ignore you or at least be standoffish, but he hands you a cup of steaming coffee with the same smile he always does, crow’s feet crinkling at the corners of his eyes as if nothing happened. 

You offer a smile in response. A silent agreement to never speak on it again.

You’ve been home for a week when it comes, a plain white envelope stuffed with something soft labeled with a return address you’re all too familiar with written in Tommy’s chicken scratch handwriting. 

You wait until Nathaniel is down for the night, but it throws you the whole evening. Letters from Tommy are more rare than phone calls. You’ve received one, maybe two since he was incarcerated. Considering he’d promised to call on after Father’s day and hadn’t, the mysterious letter makes you feel unsettled. What shoes are left to drop?

You run the envelope through your hands, thumb picking at the corner of the seal, uncommitted to actually tearing it open. You’re worried whatever lies within will only hurt you more. You can’t sustain more hurt. 

Finally, you dig into the corner, tearing it open. Your eyebrows knit together. White fabric is neatly folded and tucked within. You pull it out, revealing a square of white fabric, like a bandana unfurls and a note falls to the floor. As you take in the black and white drawing on the fabric, you gasp. It’s a drawing of the picture you keep on your nightstand. The moment Tommy met Nathaniel for the first time. Tommy’s arm is wrapped around you, Nathaniel in his arms with the biggest grin on his face. It’s a moment that’s seared into your memory. Seeing it portrayed like this brings tears to your eyes, the emotions from that day and the last 696 flooding your body. 

Before the tear completely blur your vision, you pick up the note. You can barely make out Tommy’s handwriting when your eyes are clear, but you manage. 

Baby,

You and I both know I didn’t draw this. My cellmate did based on the photo. You probably know that. They call them paños. I’ve seen a lot of the ones guys in here have sent to their girls. They’re pretty cool. 

I’m sorry. I wish I could be better for you and Nathaniel. I love you, Bonnie. 

Tommy. 

Tears stream down your face. Just like that your heart seems to forget the heartache of the last couple years. This proves that your Tommy is still inside him somewhere, fighting to come back to you. You’ll do anything to have your Tommy back. 

It doesn’t matter if you're grasping at threads. Your heart overpowers your mind. You’re determined that you can pull him back by those threads, maybe not now, but once he’s out. Once he’s out, you can bring him back. You’re his Bonnie. He’s your Clyde. You’re tied together. Your heart beats for him, but you don’t catch a piece of your heart breaking off from the rest. That part can't beat for Tommy. It’s attached to someone else. 

Taglist: @pamasaur @alltheotps @rizzraa @moel-jiller @misstokyo7love @justagalwhowrites @pedritosgfreal @mellymbee @sarahhxx03 @lizzie-cakes @sixhours @duckybird101 @anoverwhelmingdin @nervoushottee @caitlynsixxx @kaykay0315 @stevie75 @millercontracting @cals-laundry @jessthebaker @noisynightmarepoetry @vickie5446 @mewantpeepaw

[matenrou-fan]

can you do for solomon and simeon ( separately) going down on reader?

Solomon and Simeon going down to their fem! darling

femreader, teasing, fingering, semi-public sex (in Solomon's part);;

NSFW UNDER THE CUT

;MINORS DNI;

-Oh no, be prepared.

-This man is old as fuck and live for so many centuries, do you release just how big his experience in this?

-But mostly then his skilled tongue you should be afraid of how teasing and playful he becomes during bed time..

-Everything starts so sweet and romantical every time, he slowly kisses your body, enjoying your soft warm skin on his lips, his hands caressing your thighs and gently spreading them apart..

-And when his face is finally between your legs, that's where all the fun starts.

-Solomon knows all the sensitive spots on your body too well so of course by the time when he slowly takes off your panties you would be trembling, already wet and needy.

-"Ooh? So you enjoying my touches that much?" - his smile is calm and relaxed as always, his attitude right now is mysterious and chill like you two just talking between classes changes and his mouth is not a few centimeters away from your wet pulsing cunt.

-Kissing your hips, inner thighs, almost touching your labia, so close to your folds and at the same time so far away..

-Solomon is such a tease and even if you immediately start begging, he will continue his little game. He is just too fond of your blushing embarrassed face with these adorable wet eyes.

-"Shh, s/o.. We just started, okay? Let me have some fun.." - he mumbles, admiring how your pussy keeps clenching around nothing, and the way you voice is already so weak and high pitched..

-You whine, feeling as your clit throb in impatience, and only then Solomon starts slowly licking you, enjoying how wet you are, just for him to taste your juices.

-Once again, even if he finally starts eating you out, he will do it in his own way, his own pace, while looking you right in the eyes with such a calm unbothered face.. this deep sapphire blue piercing right into your soul, reading all your emotions so quickly, it's just makes you shiver and tremble even more.

-Solomon is really attentive so slight changes in the way you furrow your brows or how you squint your eyes right now can tell him many things, and he will abuse this information to play with you more, pressing his tongue right where you need it but so light and slow, tickling you but nothing more.

-"Please.. I can't take it anymore.."

-He smirks, hearing this little mewl from you. Oh, If you could see your own face right now, such a deep shade of pink on your cheeks and ears, and these half closed eyes shining with need, such a pleading expression.. So amusing and cute for Solomon..

-"If you ask better I will think about it.. " - laugh so innocently, almost mockingly. And you don't have any choice but to ask for more, while your boyfriend keeps smirking right in your pussy, this little begs like a music for his ears.

-But don't worry, he's pro not only in teasing, but in making you cum too so of course when he can see that you actually can't bear his games anymore, too overstimulated, to the point where your clit keep throb and pulse impatiently, Solomon actually start pleasing you. His tongue sped up, sucking your folds and clit so greedy, fingers slowly entered inside you, massaging hot trembling walls.

-Don't even try to hide your face or slap a hand over your mouth to mute this sweet little noise, Solomon would immediately stop, even if you were almost on edge. He's pleasing you so come on, don't be shy and please him too with this adorable face and high pitched moans, he wants to hear how good he makes you feel.

-Oh, especially if you will call him with this high tensed voice, repeating his name like it's the only world you know.. he will send you to pure bliss, feeling like his own ego (and not only ego) just raised.

-Cum as much as you want, dear, Solomon would love to see how many times he can make you climax with only his mouth and fingers, teasing you what a whiny wet mess you are.

"Look, all my bedsheets are now destroyed.." - he mumbled after you just squirted. Your head is so dizzy that you almost didn't hear him, but this smug smile and playful spark in his eyes tell you that he is definitely teasing you again. - "How will you apologize for that, s/o? ~"

-Ah yes. Squirt. Absolutely love to make you cum hard, as you throw your head back, unable to control neither your body nor voice, wave of tingles running from your core to your head, walls clenching around his fingers so tight it's almost painful for him, but he kinda enjoy it, wondering how would your wetness feel on his cock when he would bring you on edge during the main act too.

-It's like a challenge for Solomon - if he would be able to make you squirt today too? Especially during foreplay, he wants to see how red your face becomes when you realize how he brings you to such highness only with his tongue and fingers.

-Also, yes, for him it's just a foreplay, he can't get down to you and then just stops. Now he's too aroused and also wants to have some fun. He can see this hunger for more shine in your eyes, and the way your cunt keeps clenching, almost begging him to take care of your needs.. How can he stop?

-"Are you ready, my dear? Cause I think I will not let you go for the whole night.."

-Risky places? YESSS. Sometimes you think that the real demon here is Solomon, not these brothers you live together with, as he absolutely loves to tease you during classes.

-You walk in a big crowd in the corridor with him and Asmo and this pink-haired brat keep asking if you're okay, while Solomon's hand under your skirt, cupping your ass and massaging your already wet folds through panties. No one probably can see this but you can't stop blushing, your legs shake so much as you brush Asmo off, telling him you just don't feel well. Gosh, you can see in his "worried" expression that he understands everything.

-"Oh, then I think I should be a gentleman and walk you to the infirmary? It's on the right side of RAD, let's go.." - Solomon nods, with the same concerned face as he walks you away from the crowd and smirking Asmo who shouts after you to have fun and relax.

-Solomon then will drag you into an empty classroom, taking you right there, on a table. Although he really loves your moans he also would really enjoy seeing how you bite your lips in a pathetic attempt to muffle your whines, when he's already between your thighs, kissing your pulsing core through thin wet fabric.

-"Oh, I didn't expect you to enjoy my little game that much, darling.." - he smirks when he takes off your panties just to see your cunt already trembling and throbbing, pleading for more touches - "And I thought you're a saint girl, s/o.."

-Is it just you being more aroused due to the new atmosphere and exotic experience or is it just him being more fast and aggressive with his tongue..? Anyways you start enjoying this more than you thought and cum much quicker than usual, squeezing his face between your thighs while Solomon diligently licks all your juices so nothing will drop on the floor.

-Oh. Who knows that your next lesson is actually in this classroom and now you two are sitting right at this table. You really try hard to listen to the teacher but all you can think about is your still pulsing from intensive orgasm core.

-You turn to Solomon just to see his playful small smile. You can see in his eyes that oh of course he knew in advance what classroom he needed to drag you into.

-"Mm? What's wrong, s/o? Want to pay a visit to Purgatory Hall today after school..?~"

-That's a tricky one.

-He's literally an angel but due to the way he acts sometimes in the story I can see there's something behind his pure shiny eyes and soft caring smile..

-But let's start from the top.. despite his old age he's still kinda new in this all, you're probably his first lover who's got so deep in his heart (and bed).

-So Simeon would be really shy at first. All he wants is for you to feel maximum pleasure from his touches.. so he would be nice and slow in the beginning, caressing your thighs with warm hands, tickling your tummy and hips with light kisses.

-You can clearly see how red his cheeks are when he looks at your pussy, mesmerized by the view of beautiful body in front of him. Gulping nervously and looking at you like a puppy when start licking you, so gentle and soft as he is afraid to do something wrong.

-Don't laugh when he would kiss your clit with trembling lips so passionately, it's just such an intimate moment for him and he really tried to calm down.

-"Tell me, how it feels..? I need to know how to make my little doll feel good, so don't be shy and tell me what you want me to do.."

-Simeon would quickly remember all your sensitive spots, paying attention only to these places now, his tongue faster than before as he becomes more bold after a little praise from you. Your deep moans and sudden gasps tells him that you actually enjoy his sloppy movements so he will continue.

-The first few times you would be the one who lead him as he is still learning how to satisfy your body, you would receive some good and nice, but not that intense orgasms as he is still really soft but..

-..but when Simeon becomes more comfortable in bed and the bond between you grows stronger, expect that sometimes, when the mood is just right and he feels playful today, he would be more teasing with you.

-Fast quick licks on your folds, tongue pressing so tight to your clit that you can't even control your voice already, mewling and whining, chest rise and fall so quickly as you try to catch your breath. Simeon looks up at your surprised face, your cute eyes full of pleasure and these trembling lips.. He can't help but chuckle.

-"You're surprised, my darling? Haha, I think it's time for me to show you my more naughty side.." - with a soft giggle he continues to eat you out, lapping at your clit, sucking it harshly while his hands firmly grasp your thighs. Simeon can be surprisingly strong when he needs to hold you in place, as you keep squirming around from his tickling teases.

-But he can't play with you too long, just a little beg from you side would be enough cause he also already really aroused and wants to feel how you cum right in his mouth, wants to enjoy every drop of your sweet juices.. it's better than ambrosia for him.

-So soon his movements become even more sloppy, tongue abusing all your sensitive spots at a rapid pace as he listens to your moans and whispers. Breath caught up in your throat, and you stunned for a moment, feeling as a pulsing knot inside you exploded in waves of tingling pleasure, overflowing your body.

-And this is such a great view for Simeon, he can admire your figure in this pure bliss forever.. This arching back, as you lift your hips so high, pressing your cunt into his face, this trembling legs that keep shaking and squeezing his shoulders, this adorable expression on your heated face, cheeks so red and eyes shut tight, little drops of tears leave wet lines on your skin.. You're more magnificent than any other creature can ever be. Women from renaissance paintings can move away, as their beauty will never compare to your stunning body.

-So of course after you cum for good two-three times Simeon gets on top of you, wishing to explore and please your naked form more and more, not only with his tongue. Even with haze over your eyes you can clearly see his dick twitching inside tight white pants, asking for some attention too.

-"I can't wait any more.." - his voice suddenly so husky and deep, differs from his casual soft whisper, as he actually can't control himself, all his thoughts about finally thrust inside your tight hot walls and lost himself in the wetness of your cunt.

-Don't really like risky places as he wants to take his time with you in a more comfortable atmosphere, but always here to tease you a little with some hints, warm hand on your thighs under desk during classes, fingertips playing with the hem of your skirt. Maybe when you two walk in the corridor Simeon will push you closer to him so you will not bump into another student, his arms suddenly gently rubbing your waist as he doesn't let you go.

-He looks at you with a casual soft smile, but you can see a light playfulness in his bright blue eyes..

-..that quickly turns into needness when you two finally get into a private place, his grip on your waist tightened as he buried his face in your shoulder, your sweet scent makes his soul tingle… well, maybe not only soul.

-"Please.. can we go to my room as soon as lessons are over..?" - Simeon whispers in such a pleading tone, holding you tight to himself, his and your hearts are so loud and fast, almost beating in one rhythm.

-How can you say no to him? Especially when you can feel your pussy start trembling from his passionate possessive gaze, and the way his arms stroking your back.. You are already wishing to feel his touch skin to skin, without any clothes between.

-It's such a torture to sit in classroom now, seeing his continually glance at you with slight blush and soft smile. All you can see in front of you is his room, his soft bed and this smiling face between your thighs, not a chalkboard and a teacher with books…

-"Am I glad it's finally over.." - as soon as the lesson ended, Simeon got closer, touching your hand with a soft smile - "Luke will be baking with Barbatos today and Solomon said he will study in the library now, so.. We have a whole evening just for the two of us, I hope you are ready to spend all this time with me, darling..?"

[wispscribbles]

hi i just discovered your beautiful art so i obviously needed to scroll down your whole blog to catch up on everything you posted haha

i just wanted to say that i got way too emotional after reading that post of yours regarding mw3 and your mental health… on one hand i’m so sorry that you felt that way, but on the other i feel it with my whole heart

ghoap content especially for me helped me these past few months with my mental health in ways i would never have expected, it was my solace and inspiration, i started working out too and got back into drawing, got a lot better at it as well!

but unfortunately i get way too fixated on fictional stuff and there comes a time that my brain switches up and connects the things i liked and comforted me with things that make me extremely uncomfortable and stressed out, especially if i fall down a fandom rabbit hole that i would never have searched up, beacuse i know myself, i know my limits and triggers but i feel like i’m not a part of the fandom if i don’t like and interact with every single headcanon, art and ship

these past days i was really down because of that, and the things i read (why did i do that???) and now when i think of ghoap i think of that stuff and im scared that i alienated myself from the one thing that made me happy

but discovering your art and with that your post reminded me that im not alone in these feelings, even if it’s not the same exactly, and i wanted to thank you, for sharing your thoughts that time i guess haha <33

((sorry for rambling))

Long reply under 'keep reading' !! CW: talk of triggers and MCD

Always feel free to ramble my way!!! How nice you could find some comfort in my art and ghoap stuff. Especially in my mw3 post. I've been considering deleting it a few times, but hearing it maybe helped to read in some way makes me happy I left it up.

I get where you're coming from - I very much use these fictional characters as a safe space, but ppl view them very differently. There's room for it all, "don't like, don't interact" is very much a policy I agree with. It's important to mute words and be aware of your own triggers as you browse stuff in this fandom, because there's such a wide variety of stuff out there. You do NOT have to interact and agree with every thought people have on this ship, that's impossible and super stressful. There's plenty of stuff and headcanons I don't vibe with. There are no 'requirements' that you have to meet in order to enjoy fiction.

It's part of why I enjoy ghoap - that their dynamic resonates and has sparked so much creativity and outlets for so many - but it also means there's gonna be a lot of stuff u don't necessarily agree with or feel comfortable with. For example, a lot of folks use the MCD in mw3 as a way to explore grief, which I think is really cool, but on a bad day that could potentially get my brain in a bad headspace, so I only check out that art and those fics when I feel okay. There's also a bunch of stuff I'd never want to interact with, and that’s fine !!

I'm personally quite vanilla and a sucker for exploring the softer, more domestic aspects of these characters. It's what brings me joy. I know there are parts of this fandom who don’t vibe with what I make at all, and would call it untrue to the characters. Some creators enjoy exploring the more violent or toxic sides to the source material. That's just how it is, we all need different things from fiction. As long as we're capable of chilling in our respective sandboxes, then all's good.

But if you're like me, and enjoy the softer things, then definitely be aware and careful while exploring this ship and fandom. I've seen takes on these characters that are so far removed from how I view them, that they're basically the complete opposite, and it can leave a very bad taste, especially if you're the type to hinge your safe space on fiction.

Just... be mindful of yourself and your potential triggers, be respectful and don't interact with things that make you uncomfortable to the point of feeling unsafe. Shape your own online experience to your best ability.

Hope you're doing okay and still find joy in ghoap <3

[angolicious]

I love your doc headcanons. They are pristine and perfect.

Do you have any Iceman headcanons? He’s so underrated, love my psycho killer 🔪

Yes i do! Sorry it took so long!!

{warning, there’s some nsfw mixed in! I felt i had to make sure ya’ll knew that. It’s closer to the end and it’s all in one chunk so you can skip it all in one go if you need to. I didn’t scatter it. 💗 love ya’ll.}

Dating iceman 🔪

You eventually had to find out from albatross, who as usual couldn’t keep his mouth shut. He was making fun of iceman for being soft around you because he, as he put it, “love love loved you.” But he didn’t get much further before iceman picked up a chair and smacked him clean into a wall with it.

(Albatross was fine. These men are violent.)

He managed to get you by yourself later, and you guys walked in a somewhat awkward, somewhat peaceful silence on your way home before he finally muttered.

“So… how much of that did you…. Hear?” His tone didn’t seem bashful or flustered. It was low, monotonous, with an energy of him not really caring. But you could tell from the way he had trained his eyes on the shop windows as you passed them, instead of you. He was nervous. He couldn’t look at you.

After all, why would you wanna be with someone like him? That’s what was going on in his head. He was nice, sure, but only if you knew him well, and even still that wasn’t exactly the aura he gave off. He was a cold blooded killer, he knew as much and he knew you knew as much. Besides, iceman couldn’t help that believe, professions aside, you probably thought he was boring.

That was until you grabbed his arm.

“Do you… wanna get dinner before we go home? I’d like that…. To get dinner… just me and you.”

He gazed at you, as if trying to gauge your meaning. Just you and him… as friends? Were you trying to placate him? Was it pity? But your eyes looked so soft… so genuine. He was compelled to ask why, but before he could,

“I like you, iceman…. If that’s what you were wondering.”

Iceman was a man of muted emotions… concealed glee… but he cleared his throat, visibly stunned, and then smiled, just slightly.

“Dinner would be nice.”

I think iceman works best with a more energetic partner. Someone who can entertain him. However, i think he could equally vibe with someone soft who matched his energy. But i believe all balance is good, and someone who keeps him on his toes would be good for him.

He’s a great listener, because honestly he’s not much of a talker. You could go on for hours and he’d just nod along, his eyes trained on you with that deep, intense focus, as if you were the most interesting thing in the world. He gives feedback when he can, usually one to two sentences just to let you know he’s listening.

He loves just spending quality time with you. Its most likely is biggest love language… just existing in your space and you existing in his, enjoying each others company. He loves to just sit with you and listen to his records or drink his coffee while you go about your hobbies or work or whatever you need to complete. He’s never more content than in that moment.

He likes to try out new coffee shops, and take you with him. HOWEVERRR he actually had a bunch of latte equipments in his apartment and is more than happy to just make you coffee at home. Acts of service is his second biggest love language. And that man can COOK so you’re lucky to be his partner.

Compounding on the acts of service thing…. Iceman just loves to do things for you. He’s not great at expressing his feelings through words, but he can easily get things done for you. You need laundry done? He moves it over for you, folds it for you in between jobs. You mention you needed something from the store, he never forgets. You complaining about something broken in your apartment, he comes over and fixes it. A real fix-it-Felix, that man. Give him a tool box and he’s shockingly resourceful. He does it silently, without ever asking for gratitude. Of course, when you give it he always accepts if, though somewhat flustered.

He’s always very curious in what you’re doing as well, especially if it’s a far cry from what he’s used to. The life of a mafia hitman is pretty straightforward, so coming home to his partner drawing, or crocheting… or reading… or doing anything of that matter… he’s interested. Sometimes he’ll read whatever you’re reading over your shoulder. He’s caught you reading smut a few times… and has awkwardly asked if you would prefer he be more like the people in your books.

You of course, immediately told him no, but mentioned you would be interested in trying some of that stuff in the bedroom. The sex was good, to say the least.

Iceman doesn’t initiate sex super often, maybe once a week… twice if he’s really feeling it. But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t want to! If you initiated every single day, multiple times a day, he would be so down. He adores you- he lives and breaths you. He wants you in ways that violate the Geneva Convention- anywho…

He just wants to be a gentleman, and he doesn’t want you thinking he’s some kind of hound dog. In fact, early into your relationship, he made no sort of even inclination towards a sexual advance until you did first. He is shockingly shy in the bedroom at first until he gets the hang of it. One of only two members of the flags who were a virgin before you. (The other one being doc.)

He doesn’t ever wanna scare you or intimate you. He knows how he can come off, so he’s always slow and gentle with you when you guys get intimate, unless he picks up that you want otherwise, or he’s feeling a little jealous.

And when he’s rough? You may need to prepare in advance and call off work for a few days. That man is BIG and he can really go to town if given the go ahead. He’s pent up… it’s all stored in him like a bomb waiting to explode and once every blue moon it goes off. He always apologizes afterwards and kisses all the little bites he left on your shoulders and chest. He feels genuinely guilty, so assure him it’s okay.

Even still, he’ll be really sweet to you in the days following, with lots of meals and packed lunches and little acts of service trailing you wherever he goes. And he’s worried you’re secretly mad at him, so when he gets the chance he kinda lingers in your presence like a lost puppy until the anxiety fades.

His worst fear is finally scaring you off or losing you. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to him. He wants to marry you. You’re his peace… the one he knows he can come home to after having to face the music of doing something as terrible as he’s done.

He wants to start a family one day, but he things that life is something he’ll never be able to have. You may have to push for it a bit, but not because he doesn’t want it. He just gets scared.

But he would be the most AMAZING father. Calm, sweet, shockingly nurturing in his own quiet way. Stern when he needs to be, but never raising his voice, and always making sure his kids love him. The kind of man who could go out and literally murder someone and then still come home and pack bento boxes for his kids with post-it notes that say ‘have a great day. Do great things. I love you~ dad’

He would want them to do better than him, and would keep them and you as far away from the mafia life as possible.

Would take on extra jobs to pay for extracurriculars for them, or supplies, or field trips, or hobbies or interests.

He probably starts a college fund the second to mention kids/get pregnant/adopt.

Listen… he’s an incredible incredible AMAZING man and anyone would be lucky to have him. He’s such a sweetheart… and honestly a mafia househusband.

I can’t stress enough how good of an option this man would be as far as partners. Honestly, he may be one of the best boyfriends you could get out of the entire flags.

[barenecessiteas]

Final Random Sinclair Headcanons Because I Can't Get Them Out Of My Head

Hello my darlings. We've reached the final part of my random headcanons. There's only one person left - you know him, you love him, it's adorable waxy boi Vincent! Again, these are all just random thoughts I had, I don't really write on here much, but these just kept coming to me so I figured I may as well share em. Hope you enjoy!

Vincent Sinclair

If you didn't happen to see this on my last post, I believe Vincent is the younger twin and Bo is the older one. Only apart by seconds for obvious reason, but Bo was technically born first

Even after the separation surgery, baby Vincent had a hard time sleeping unless Bo was with him. Having his literal other half suddenly not be attached anymore took a lot of adjustment for him

He also exclusively sleeps on his right side, or at least with the right side of his face against the pillow. Kinda like a subconscious need to feel something against the skin there since Bo wasn't attached to him anymore

Vincent is actually able to talk, he's just selectively mute. This comes from the abuse he witnessed on Bo by their parents

I kinda touched on this last time, but restraining Bo to the chair every time he "misbehaved" or threw a tantrum really just taught the kids that it wasn't acceptable to express their emotions. So even tho Vincent never actually experienced the same punishment, it scared him to watch that happen to his brother

That's why, in the introduction to the film, you see little Vincent seemingly just ignore Bo while he's strapped into the chair, just quietly eating his cereal and swinging his feet

This is NOT because he didn't care about his brother. He was just scared of getting the same treatment that Bo did. He had the idea that if he behaved in front of his parents, he'd be able to sneak off to comfort Bo later

We all see in the film how he's immediately concerned for Bo when he notices the arrow in his chest. He hates seeing either of his brothers hurt, and he just started feeling more comfortable openly expressing that after their parents were gone

So yes, he can talk, but usually it's not unless he absolutely has to. His voice is often harsh and raspy because of this, but it's still there

I don't see Vincent as the meek, timid, and abused twin like a lot of people do. Bo isn't just his brother, he's Vincent's TWIN brother. He's literally been dealing with Bo since they were in the womb

Vincent is just calmer by nature and it's much harder to actually get him angry. He's learned that Bo says a bunch of shit he doesn't mean when he's angry and it's usually best to just let him cool off on his own. Vincent doesn't take it personally

This doesn't mean they don't fight. It happened more when they were kids, but as fully grown adult men Vincent rarely ever gets so pissed off he actually fights with Bo

I think most people agree on this next part but I'm gonna say it anyway - Vincent started growing his hair out so that he'd have something to hide his face with if he ever needed to take off the mask

Even with that in mind, he's not afraid to throw hands if Bo really manages to piss him off 💀

Like they have gotten into legit brawls and fist fights as children if they got on each other's nerves

He does genuinely like the look of it long now, but it started mostly as a security blanket type thing

Speaking of his hair, his is naturally darker than Bo's, he doesn't dye it or anything. We see in pictures that they were blonde as young kids and their hair got darker as they grew older. Bo's hair just stopped darkening at the dark brown we see him with. Vincent's hair just kept on getting darker

He actually does take pretty good care of his hair. He's not super concerned about it, but he doesn't want it to be a rat's nest either. He makes sure to keep it brushed, washes it regularly, and he's generally good at keeping wax out of it

Vincent wasn't really bullied as much for his mask as most people think he was. The Sinclairs were basically local celebrities, so everyone in town knew who they were. Their birth and separation surgery were announced in the paper too, so everyone kinda knew it was from that

What really bothered him was the pity from other people. Kids could be assholes about it every now and then, sure, but hearing adults whisper about it was what he'd really hate

He got into wax kinda by accident. It was a day while Trudy was working on a new mask for him, he was sitting around watching her. She gave him some extra wax she had lying around to play with

Saying stuff like "poor boy" or "shame he didn't turn out as good looking as his brother" when they thought he wasn't listening. That's what really got to him

Vincent also isn't really shy, he's just introverted. He found that hearing people talk about him and feeling sorry for him behind his back exhausted him, so he really just prefers the company of his family

Trudy and Victor often told the boys old mythology stories at bedtime, so Vincent decided he wanted to make what he thought the monsters and creatures in the stories looked like

Since it was his first time using wax, it was far from perfect, but he'd spent so long watching his mom work on her art that he had an idea of some of the technique

He actually used a spoon to shape the wax for most of it lol

Even for such a young kid, he definitely showed promise. That's when Trudy really started to take him under her wing. She was delighted to be able to bond with one of her boys like that

Vincent always felt a little guilty for having a closer relationship with Trudy because of how she and Victor would treat Bo (and how they'd pay much less attention to Lester). He still loved his parents, but it definitely added a huge guilt complex

That's why he's so concerned about always being there for Bo and Lester to help take care of them. He just tends to let Bo take the initiative in taking care of him and Lester because he knows it makes Bo feel better

Just like Bo, he was taught to play the piano growing up. He's pretty good at it, but he never had the same interest in it that Bo did. He enjoyed listening to music more than playing it

Vincent has a very broad taste in music, he listens to a lot of different genres. Classical music is pretty much exclusively for when he's sculpting or making any form of art in general

It's a habit he picked up from his mother. He finds it less distracting so it helps him concentrate more

Like Bo, he was also very good at sports growing up. Really all of the boys were (Bo was just the most involved in it so he got better than his brothers eventually). He's actually surprisingly active

He tries to take frequent breaks when working with wax, even if it's just for a tiny bit. If he doesn't, his muscles get very sore, making it hard for him to work later on

However, when I say he tries I really mean that he only remembers to take breaks with smaller projects. Bo and Lester (or even Jonesy) usually have to remind him to step away for a bit

Speaking of Jonesy, she is in fact Vincent's dog. Yeah, she's the family dog too, but Vincent is the one who found her and raised her

He was going for a walk in the woods and found Jonesy abandoned as a puppy. Even though she was young she was still much smaller than she should have been. Her mother and litter mates were nowhere to be found

So Vincent gently picks her up and carries her home in the pocket of his hoodie. He stays up all night feeding her and watching over her to make sure she recovers physically

Bo was surprisingly chill with Vincent keeping the puppy. As long as Vincent was responsible for taking care of her, he didn't mind having a dog around

Lester lost his shit when he found out Vincent took in a puppy (in a good way, of course)

Vincent basically treats her like his baby (we stan a girl dad) and takes VERY good care of her. She has a great diet, has constant play sessions, and is overall very well cared for

It bothers him when Lester sneaks her some roadkill meat because he's always scared about Jonesy potentially getting sick

Jonesy also sleeps in Vincent's bed with him and has seen his face more than his actual brothers have. She loves to give him kisses on the scarred side of his face and it makes him melt

When Bo first came up with the idea of killing people to use as a base for Vincent's wax sculptures, he was hesitant. Sure, he knew killing people was wrong, but he was more worried about the danger it could place his brothers in

But once he actually used the first victim as a live "model" of sorts, he was convinced that this was the perfect way to finish his mother's dream. It didn't take him a lot of convincing

His collection of knives are all gifts from Bo and Lester. They'd often either buy them or find them on victims before cleaning them up to give them to vincent

The dual dragon blades are his favorites because it was a combined present from Bo and Lester for Christmas

He has much more morbid curiosity in killing because of his father's work. He found anatomy very interesting (and not to mention useful when it came to sculpting people), so he often takes pictures or videos to use as references when painting or sketching

Alright, we've now reached the end of my insanity. I hope you all enjoyed my silly little writing spree. I may or may not write more Headcanons in the future, idk. We'll see if inspiration ends up striking me lol. But for now, we've finished the Sinclairs. Thanks for reading, my lovelies, and I hope you all have a wonderful day 😘💕

[broodwolf221]

I love your writing and meta so much and have burned through most of your fic already, so I trust your judgment! Do you have fic recs I should check out? Thanks in advance!

oh no i cry 😭 pls this is so sweet.....

gotta start with the recent gift i got from arlathan exchange bc it is soooo good! sweater has a gorgeous, vivid writing style that i really enjoy. this one is spicy! 🔥but seriously her writing is just So Good? i love the way they set scene and tone

hunger by @fadedsweater / sweaterghost on ao3

In the moonlit dark of Mythal's palace there is a hunger that rumbles beneath the sprawling marble floors and shakes the foundation of each gilded pillar. It is a hunger that spreads like smoke and burns like fire. Solas has known this hunger for a long, long time. Solas visits Mythal’s court, intent to sway her from her current warpath. Meanwhile, Mythal can't help but notice that he has gone far too long without feeding. Ancient Arlathan, but with vampires.

my friend jazz has been getting into da and they've written so much lovely stuff for it, always with really excellent characterization and fascinating premises. one of my personal favs from their writing is this exploration of cole and vivienne's relationship

wellspring by @jazzmckay / desiredemon on ao3

Long ago, Cole promised, "I can protect you. If templars come for you, I will kill them." Vivienne never expected such a thing to ever take place.

i still need to finish this one and this is a nice reminder to get on that, but this writer has an extraordinary style and their handling of solas is so good?? i'm in awe tbh. seriously beautiful writing.

though my language is dead (still the shapes fill my head) by @darethshirl / mafalda_157 on ao3

She gazed up at him, silent and calm, green eyes unblinking. Outwardly she was the very image of tranquility, her expression as unmoving as the surface of a vast clear lake. If any thoughts or emotions lurked somewhere in those depths there was no way to tell. - This veiled world will always feel muted. Still, Solas tries his best to communicate.

another spicy one, but playwithdinos has suchhhh a vivid style and there's just something so lovely and profound about it. my first introduction to her writing is this one, and her depiction of solas is fascinating i love it.

the switch by @playwithdinos / @dinoswrites / playswithdinos on ao3

Lavellan usually lets Solas take charge when they're alone, but she's back from slaying the Fereldan Frostback and she's not in the mood to bow to anyone. Fill for this kink meme prompt: http://dragonage-kink.livejournal.com/13696.html?thread=53207680

anddd another spicy one (anyone else sensing a theme here?), this writer is... wow. wish i knew their tumblr if they have one so they can know i'm gushing about them beyond my comment. this is a delightfully messy and complex examination of how solas/andruil/ghilan'nain might happen, and i'm absolutely enthralled by the characterization of andruil and ghilan'nain here - and solas as well!

Power, Intrigue, Danger and Sex by Hezjena on ao3

When Solas later recalled the evening, he liked to imagine it was the result of careful manipulation, a triumph of his skilled diplomacy and a delicious trickery where he allowed himself to be underestimated… rather than the result of too much ice wine and morbid curiosity. *** That time Solas accidentally-on-purpose has a threesome with Andruil and Ghilan’nain in Ancient Elvhenan.

okay, rosie's writing is So Good? i'm always super impressed by how she describes scenes and also just... the layers. seriously. the foreshadowing is always amazing. her handling of solas is sooo good and also? an extraordinary artist? too powerful tbh <3

In the Blue Morning by @rosieofcorona / rosieofcorona on ao3

He wants to stay like this forever, wants the sun to forget to rise, wants the castle to sleep and sleep in an endless dream. But the light keeps coming, every moment. The castle will wake, and they will see. And this will cost them, in the end.

i could so easily keep going tbh but this is already getting long and i might've passed the @'ing limit already lmao

[bengiyo]

Last Twilight Ep 4 Stray Thoughts

Last week, Mhok took Day out of the house to handle his withdrawal from university. The dean only allowed a temporary pause, encouraging Day not to give up on schooling or his future. While at school, Mhok made Day take him around a bit, but also helped shield him from encountering some of his friends before he was ready. Later, they went to a busy market to search for a book Day wanted on what was absolutely a date. Unfortunately, Mhok lost focus at one point and started fighting Porjai’s fiancé when he realized ole boy was stepping out on her. Mhok managed to find Day through the help of the hot pink shirt they had bought earlier, and then went home to Day’s worried family. The mom tried to fire Mhok, but Day stepped in and refused to let Mhok go.

“Do you even know how to flirt? I bet you don’t,” into Mhok putting the bowl of jasmine flowers in front of his nose. You both are fooling no one.

I like that Mhok is still taking Day out on trips, and I’m glad we’re using the He’s Coming to Me car.

Oh no, the intentionally bad singing. I almost never have to mute the singing, but did so here.

I love the dynamic between Porjai and Mhok. We almost never get to see exes with a functional friendship. That Mhok will likely end up with Day, and projecting a bit because of Namtam, we have bisexual exes with a good friendship. That feels special.

Day seems insistent about this friend thing, and it clearly touches Mhok.

Look at Day trying to get some details on Mhok by calling him Porjai’s boyfriend. He’s clever, but so is Porjai.

I’m always happy to see Film. I like this character already. She’s got a little bit of a chip on her shoulder that makes her seem tough.

I’m glad Day’s sense of humor has returned and he can tease Gee. That’s a good sign.

I like the show introducing new social challenges for Day every time he steps out a little bit to do something again. Telling Gee led to going to the gym, which led to an invite to a team event, and now he’s been faced with a fan.

I am very much looking forward to Day meeting August again.

Sea really has a great smile. He’s grown a lot as a performer since Vice Versa.

I also won first and second place trophies in national competitions. I feel for Day here.

I feel like I saw a recipe for this soup earlier today but cannot recall the name now.

This soft hands scene is GAY as hell!!

Mhok and Keng about to be like Kim and Sheego: ON SIGHT.

SHE’S PREGNANT!!

Did the badminton team host their goodbye party at a gay club??

Okay, I like Khaw asking Day about porn. That’s probably dude behavior. Quickly communicates the past relationship and their attempts to be more comfortable with each other.

Mhok really is so tactful when it comes to Day. Showing up in the bathroom and clearing up that social situation instantly was so well done.

No, Day, please don’t make Mhok sing again. I’m enjoying the flirting enough!

I fully expected Mhok to sing the romantic song from the car and was not wrong. Oh, Aof.

I wonder how badly Day and August parted that he was so nervous about running into him today.

Just throw him into bed sweaty and in his outside clothes??

Oh, whew, we’re making Day change at least.

Mm, I’m feeling emotional about Day trying to privately see Mhok’s face and not give himself away.

Yep. Mhok was in prison. He’s definitely a light sleeper, and definitely knew what as happening.

Oh, hell yeah! August shows up next week!

This really is one of my favorite shows airing right now. Aof has a strong handle on the pacing of relationships, and he loves when relationships work towards emotional closeness after another boundary is crossed.

[dangermousie]

Would you consider giving Are You The One/ Hidden Charm a chance? It has The Double vibes and not at all sweet ones, although there are funny and touching moments. The angst and male lead shooting/stabbing are delicious. The female lead has amnesia during the first part of the drama but she's not a dummy. And the male lead is digging his own grave with his lies and manipulations while falling deeply in love with her. I really do think it could be right up your alley.

Hi!!!

Thank you for the rec!

I actually did check it out - I watched the first six eps back when it started airing. Alas, it was not the one for me and its charm remained hidden (sorry, I honestly couldn't resist!)

6 eps is probably a good representative chunk; it's not impossible that a drama that didn't work for me for the first 15% will end up working afterwards, but it's pretty unlikely.

I agree that on paper, the premise sounds very much my thing but for whatever reason, the execution just didn't click. It felt really fluffy and bland and I had no emotional investment or interest in the characters or their relationship. Some of it is the actors - ZWY was wonderful in Lost You Forever, but he came across as muted here (and confession time - I was so annoyed by LYF2 and his character encapsulated why - that even though it wasn't his fault I probably should have a little break before I should watch him in another drama because I just get annoyed all over again) and Wang Churan is an actress who has never evoked anything but irritation in me for whatever reason except for small role in Joy of Life 2.

But honestly, it's just the vibe. As I am sure you can tell, I am an emotional vampire who lives for intensity in my dramas (it doesn't have to be high angst melo; a slice of life drama like Will Love in Spring will do just as well provided I am emotionally drawn in.) And this drama just did not grab me emotionally at all. They were competent, nice-ish people who I felt no dislike of but also no involvement with. My feeling was - they get a happy ending? Nice. A terrible ending? Also nice.

There is literally only one other circumstance under which a drama where the narrative and the leads don't grab me can become an obsession - and that's if cinematography is gorgeous enough. The Double for example was a beautiful fever dream visually so even when I lost a lot of interest in the narrative in the second half, I loved watching it. I will watch any Guo Jingming production, however nonsensical and full of actors I don't care for, because I find the visuals that jawdropping. But while Hidden Charm is not a badly filmed or ugly drama, it's workmanlike - the cinematography and visuals in general do not stand out to me.

This is a very long screed so apologies. tl;dr summary: I tried it and it's not in the least a bad drama but it's not to my taste because it feels fluffy and not emotionally involving to my tastes.

But if you are watching it, hope you are enjoying it!!! Everyone has different tastes so my rant above is a purely personal explanation as to why it didn't work for me, not a comment on the drama quality.

As to my cdrama slate - I am pretty stoked for Love in Nirvana which supposedly drops in September after Hidden Charm ends so hopefully I will have better luck in the fall :) And Chang Le Qu on the 26th though it's mango so good luck to me with subs!

[hashimasims]

The season is just about to change to Winter. The day before Harvestfest Kanaloa asks her to join him for a walk through Myshuno Meadows. The two of them walk in amicable silence just enjoying the scenery until they make it back to the entrance of the park and Kana pulls her under the remaining blossoms of the Cherry Tree. She does not like where this is going.

Kanaloa: Elucea, I . . . Elucea: No Kana, the answer is no. Kanaloa: But you don't even know what I was going to say Elucea: The romantic walk, the trying for a nice back drop with the remaining blossoms, this has proposal written all over it Kanaloa: Well it is an proposal of sorts. But you're still engaged to the other, Taehyung if I remember correctly, so no I was not about to propose marriage. Speaking of, have you heard from him yet? Elucea: No he still hasn't answered any of my messages or answered my calls. One time his phone answered, maybe it was in his pocket, and the only thing I could hear sounded like muffled screaming like he was watching a horror movie. Sounded like someone was trying to say something through a gag maybe and then the line went dead. He and I have watched a few scary movies together and it didn't sound like anything I'd ever watched with him before, not that it matters anyway.

Elucea retreats into herself for a moment, eyes glazed over wondering if something may have happened to Taehyung and those sounds were coming from him and she was meant to hear them. Taehyung had once told her he could feel her emotions through the bond, though muted because she hadn't accepted it fully yet. Would the Bond, no matter how tenuous, tell her if something horrible was happening to him at this moment? Would it tell her if he was dead? She accepted him and what they were together but hadn't fully accepted being tied to just one man, she had far too much love to give and wanted to feel the extra love and affection she was denied throughout her childhood. This she had surmised was part of the reason she was Poly, and also why she had accepted the advances of an adult as a teenager. Kana clearing his throat brought her back to the present. He knew where she went when she became distant, even if only for a moment, and tried not to pull her back before she was ready. But this was important so he felt he had to bring her back to this present moment and out of the pit of worry that so often tried to claim her.

Elucea: So . . . if you're not proposing marriage, what are you proposing? Kanaloa pulls out a small key trying to hand it to her Kanaloa: I would like for you to move in with me, into my apartment in Evergreen Harbor. Elucea: I'm sorry Kana I can't my fur babies Kanaloa: Zuma and Whisper might enjoy it out there. I can take them for a jog with me every morning, there's a new park we can take them to to make some furry friends, maybe you could quit your job and stay home for a while? I know you got the island is thriving notification so that means you're done fixing it right? I don't know how I feel being around cats but I'm sure I'd grow to love them. Elucea: I appreciate the offer Kana I do but forcing all of us into a tiny apartment might not be the best idea. Kelly and Frankie are constantly going at it but at least at home they have the whole island to get away from each other. Look, how about this, here's the spare key to my place. I'm not asking you to move in but for now you can come and go as you please and we can give living together a trial run this way. Kanaloa: Ok El I can compromise. Anything for you.

Beginning|Previous|Next

[silenceofthewave]

[A SOUNDWAVE ROLEPLAY BLOG]

– This is a multi-verse roleplay and ask blog.

– Soundwave's character is a mixture between TF Prime and TF One. It's frame is consistent with Prime, which means it has the visor, datacables and creature like quality (hence the it/its pronouns).

– This blog does not shy away from shitposting, but don't let that scare you! I enjoy literature RP just as much, and always welcome discussion when opening new threads.

– Feel free to DM me! I am open to DM RPs as well as discussion! I'm here to make friends and have a good time :)

– Author is 24 years old, and does not shy away from NSFW topics. This includes smut, but also extends to violence, robogore, and the like. I understand I interact with minors, and I am always very careful to ensure they are not exposed to anything explicit. If you are interested in explicit RP, it MUST be kept to DMs for this purpose. I also need assurance that you Are above 18+ in order to engage in this way.

– Due to the multiverse nature of the blog, this is also multi-ship! I am willing to consider anyone who has good chemistry with Soundwave, but my otps are MegaSound, StarSound and WaveWave.

- PFP by compaculaaa

[RULES]

– Please put as much effort as I do into our RPs. It's frustrating writing out a big reply only to get a paragraph back. (This ofc does not apply to shitposting.)

– Minors are free to interact, but please keep in mind that I am particular and reserve the right to stop a RP if its veering into territory I'm not comfortable with. (as are you!! and this applies to all RPs)

– Please reach out to me before starting a big thread, and please keep in contact throughout so we can stay on the same page.

– OCs are welcome!

– Please send asks! Soundwave loves them. But, please do not flood my ask box. I assure you, I've seen it, and it will be answered.

– If you want to start an RP through an ask, please make sure we are mutuals. My notifications get flooded very easily and I am currently trying to work out a management system for them.

– To piggyback off that, if I missed a response from you please either Tag me in the comments of the thread, OR send me a DM with the link to your response. Like I said, my notifications are a MESS, and I know it's very likely for me to miss something.

– Since this has been a problem before, please please please don't purposefully flood my notifications. While I am Committed to the Bit, it's very overwhelming and buries replies. I appreciate the humor, but it's one of the few times I'll say something is unnecessary.

[UNIVERSES]

– 1024.14 Tau: The Chaos Verse

Lovingly called The Chaos Universe, this is where Soundwave gets to shitpost for fun and free. Soundwave has never known peace a day in its life in this universe. Soundwave speaks freely, using the typical "Soundwave: [sentence]" format.

Tagged as u 1024.14

Shipped with @/Lord-Starscream

- 1024.15 Tau: Revival

The Revival Universe currently focuses on the journey to bring Soundwave's cassettes back, utilizing Shockwave's cloning techniques. Angst and grief abound, Soundwave finds itself questioning everything thing it knows about itself. Soundwave has gone mute due to the grief of losing its beloved Cassettes, and instead uses others voices to speak. Still, it finds it has trouble voicing its true thoughts and feelings.

Tagged as u 1024.15

Eventually to be shipped with @/dailydoseoflogic

[HEADCANONS]

Soundwave thoroughly enjoys human music and art. It even has a hacked Spotify account and will listen to music while its flying, alone, or even share it with those closest to it.

Soundwave has managed to get itself connected to the internet, and will regularly do internet searches on things it is unfamiliar with. It also enjoys watching movies and videos.

Soundwave has a strong EM field, which it uses to hone its telepathy, and occasionally share emotions it cannot express.

Soundwave is not emotionless. It feels a lot, actually, but cannot express that.

It uses many emoticons to express what it's feeling, all with their own different meanings.

Soundwave's telepathy is touch based.

Before the war, Soundwave was a gladiator with Megatron. It honed its skills and life long friendship with the Decepticon leader in the pits of Kaon. It trusts Megatron with its life because of their shared experiences. Its loyalty to the Decepticon cause runs deeper than politics.

Soundwave loves its Cassettes. It will put itself in the line of fire to protect them, and will protect them even if it means certain death. In the universes where its Cassettes have gone offline, it's extremely vengeful and will stoop to murder to avenge its beloveds.

The Cassettes were built by Soundwave's own servos. A sliver of its spark splits off, and it only has a few days to build a spark chamber, the beginnings of a protoform and install an internal repair system. The process is extremely time and resource intensive, hence why it has not made new Cassettes during the war.

[TAGS]

#u 1024.14 - The Chaos Verse

#u 1024.15 - Revival

#Soundwave: <3 - usually used on neat artwork that i, and by extension soundwave, enjoys

#TheWaves - wavewave art, headcanons, general posting

#SoundAmongTheStars - StarSound art, headcanons, general posting

#Soundwave: >:( - usually used in RP to denote displeasure or anger

#Soundwave: Loves Its Cassettes - exactly what it sounds like, mostly artwork ft the Cassettes

#Soundwave: :( - Usually used in RP to denote some kind of sadness

#nightlygreeting - my sign off posts

#admin babbles - i enjoy yapping sometimes

[yandere-himiko-toga]

Hii! Could I please req an Ike Eveland and Luca Kaneshiro x femme reader fic? 😭😭 probably something like angst,hurt/comfort. Sorry, if you're uncomfortable with those,you can write anything else you'd like as well

Yeah of course~! I apologize for not seeing your request sooner! I've been a little busy but of course I can do that! I'll post it here and on my alt account @spirit-girl-nijisanji ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

I'm sorry, I've been distant...

Don't ever talk about her like that!

꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦

➼ Pairing - Ike Eveland & Luca Kaneshiro x Fem!Reader (seperately)

➼ Content - Angst/hurt to comfort, mentions of insecurities, established relationships, Ike being a soft boy and Luca being well... Luca <3

➼ ⚠️ Please remember I only write for the personas you see on your screen. I do not and will not write for the people behind the models. Please also remember that behind the models there are very real people with very real emotions. Please be respectful towards our beloved Nijisanji EN livers and do your best to separate the real people from the persona reflected on your screen. Thank you so much and enjoy the story ⚠️

➼ Summery; Overworking and snapping on you causes some issues... ꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦

Ike Eveland

➼ You are one of the only solo vtubers within Nijisanji EN. You debuted as Kitsune vtuber brought from another world to watch over young children and grant luck to those who deserve it. You had been a big hit within Niji, the other talents and you got along very well and you ended up bonding deeply with a certain novelist.

The collabs you did with Ike were always full of fun and laughter, it wasn't long before the shipping began within the quilldren and your fd/n (fandom name). You and Ike always just claimed to be friends but behind the scenes, there was something much more going on. You and Ike had began dating after two months of you being Nijisanji.

Everything was going amazing in your eyes, you trusted Ike with your life and he trusted you with his. There was no trust issues and he had been helping you through so many struggles. You had always been insecure about yourself but he made you feel beautiful and loved.

You and Ike had been dating a year when you moved to live with him permanently and you loved it. A very fond memory of yours was how your friends found out about you and Ike; he had been in a discord call with the rest of Luxiem, you two hadn't told anything about your relationship yet. Not realizing he was unmuted in the call, you had come into his room to bring him a plate of caviar toast.

" Babe, here's your snack! I figured you would be hungry. " you beamed walking over to his desk and setting down the plate before giving him a kiss on the cheek.

The moment the word Babe left your lips, Ike froze. Realizing he hadn't been muted and the chatter from his genmates had completely stopped.

" IS THAT Y/N?! " the voice of the bri'ish detective rang out in your ears and you two froze seeing Ike hadn't muted himself and you just outted your relationship to his friends.

You and Ike planned to tell them, just not yet but it was a little too late..

" Hah.. Hi guys. " you spoke sheepishly. Multiple voices erupting into questions about when you got together, why didn't you tell them sooner.

After that day, the rest of Niji EN knew about your relationship and it was also revealed to the fans too, by you and Ike of course, which was met by a lot of positivity which warmed your heart.

But.. as of late, Ike seemed to always be shut in his streaming room. You hardly saw him anymore and he hardly ever slept in your shared bedroom. You had started to get concerned about him but anytime you tried to talk to him, he would wave you off and say that was busy and didn't need the distraction.

The confrontation that led to the current situation was when you had finally had enough of him avoiding you and being locked in his office all day, was the day he snapped at you;

You opened his door to see him hunched over his desk working on collab and stream ideas as well as a new novel, the dark circles under his eyes evident. You were worried sick so you walked over and you spun his chair around to face you, only to be met by Ike's irritated green eyes,

" Y/N I told you that I was busy and not to come into my office didn't I? " he said in a tired but frustrated tone

" I know but Ike you've been locked in this office for days, I hardly see you anymore. It wouldn't kill you take a break. " You retorted, worry etched on your face

Ike let out an irritated sigh, he looked up at you and brushed your hands off his chair turning back to his desk to continue his work,

" Y/N I am busy please leave my room. "

You glared at him and grabbed the back of Ike's chair and started dragging it to his door before he shot up out of his chair and grabbed onto your wrist, his green eyes now glaring down at you angrily before yelling,

" Y/N I SAID I'M BUSY! " he snapped gripping your wrist

" I CAME IN BECAUSE I'M WORRIED IKE! " You snapped back

" NO! YOUR GETTING IN MY WAY! " He snapped, not registering that what came out of his mouth

Your eyes went wide, feeling your eyes watering, the tone of his voice caused you to flinch before you ripped your wrist out of Ike's grip and you rushed out of his room, slamming the door behind you, leaving Ike standing in his room. You sprinted into the shared bedroom you shared with Ike, slamming the door and locking the door before your back hit the door and you slid down to the floor and curdled up, hugging your knees and burying your face in your knees. The tears that had come up in your eyes now began to slip down your cheeks.

Those intrusive thoughts started to creep up, 'is he getting tired of me?', 'Am I really getting in his way?', 'Why is he still with me?', 'I'm not worth his time..' you sat in the dark in the dark room trying to calm down. But now you felt you weren't good enough for to be with Ike. Maybe you were really getting in the way.

You spent 2 weeks after he finally finished with his work ignoring him. He noticed immediately. He tried to talk to you and apologize for his actions.

" Älskling.. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean anything I said.. Please talk to me. " Ike followed you around the house trying to get you to talk to him. But you ignored him.

He figured it was time to give you space so he did. He constantly noticed your spiral. All the confidence you once had, was gone. He knew it was his fault for saying what he said. But it all came to a boil when he found you sitting on the kitchen floor at 1 am in tears,

" Y/N?! Are you okay? " he asked, concern lacing his voice as he dropped down to your side and pulling you into a tight hug.

" Why are you even with me.. I know I'm always in your way! " you said starting to fight against his hug however he refused to let go, he hugged you tight. Keeping you tight in his arms. Now whispering to you, telling you that he loved you and he never meant anything he said.

You cried into his shoulder as you listened to him tell you over and over again that he loved you and he thought you were perfect to him. ꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦

Luca Kaneshiro

➼ You were a new nijisanji liver that came into nijisanji with a new wave, xsoleil along with Doppio Dropsythe, Hex Haywire, Ver Vermillion, Kotoka Torahime and Meloco Kyoran. The first person you had met when you joined Nijisanji was the one and only Luca Kaneshiro.

When you finally started doing livestreams regularly, most of your collabs ended up being with the mob boss. You adored his Lucubs and you knew he adored your fans. Your livestream collabs with Luca were always filled with chaos and laughter along with Lucubs and your fans saying they wish you and Luca would just get together already. You and Luca playfully flirted back and fourth all the time, well you flirted with Luca and he wouldn't pick up on it.

It was the one year anniversary from your debut and you were doing a collab playing Valorant, Xsoleil VS Luxiem. The teams had switched up after the first 4 rounds, now you, Luca, Doppio, Shu and Hex were on a team against, Vox, Ike, Mysta, Kotoka, Meloco and Ver. The round started and it was all going smoothly until you made a flirty remark towards Luca and it completely went over his head. After being taken down by Ver, you turned to read some of the superchats that came in, thanking them one by one before one completely stopping, silently reading one and you felt your heart completely shatter;

Superchat; Luca'sCape221: Seriously stop making advances towards him. He doesn't like you! Like damn. Why haven't you graduated yet, why are you still here?

You were silent for a good few minutes before the voice of Doppio snapped you out of your trance,

" Hey, VT/N (Vtuber name), You okay? " He asked making you jump before speaking,

" What? Oh um yeah I'm fine Dopi! " you replied quickly, " I have to take a quick bathroom break! " you quickly added before muting and running off to the bathroom.

~ NO ONE'S POV ~

Doppio thought it was odd that you just ran off, so when both he and Luca were killed, he started talking to Luca,

" Hey Luca, do you mind checking on VT/N's stream, she went silent while reading superchats. I think something happened. " he told the blond haired mafia boss who took action almost immediately. Turning on your stream and reading through before finding the superchats that followed with many nasty comments.

Seeing the nasty remarks from multiple people about you made his blood boil. He had only recently found out about your actual feelings and he felt the same he just didn't know how to tell you. When the match was over, he asked everyone to wait for a moment until you got back so he could say something.

~ Your POV ~

You spent a good long time in the bathroom in tears, the words from the superchat bouncing around in your mind. You tried to compose yourself so you could rejoin the collab, before you pulled up your stream and looked at the chat, seeing the flood of nasty remarks coming in, you broke down again.

After a moment, you decided to return to stream. Putting your headphones on and unmuting yourself as you spoke saying you were ready for the next game, internally groaning hearing the shaking in your voice when you spoke. Before anyone could say anything else Luca spoke up,

" Actually I wanna say something before we continue, it's important. " he spoke and everyone went silent so Luca could speak.

" Okay so, while VT/N was gone on her bathroom break, I looked at her chat. I wanna say that I am absolutely disgusted by how many nasty comments there were about her. For your information, I do happen to like her so let's shut that down right now. " He spoke in a very stern tone,

The group went completely silent, you didn't even notice that tears started to fall once again listening to Luca rant and scold those who left nasty comments in your chat.

" I do not want to see any other nasty comments like that in her chat again and I will be checking. If I see so much as one, you'll be banned by ME personally. " the normally bubbly blond said, remembering you had made him a mod in your chat. The comments filled with comforting words from both your own fanbase and Lucubs. You sniffled, catching the attention of your teammate, Shu.

" Hey, don't cry VT/N.. We got your back. " He told you in a soothing voice followed by the comforting words from your other friends and genmates. Through the chaos, you heard your phone beep, looking down, you looked at the notification and saw Luca's name;

Discord chat: Lucar Kaneshiroe: Hey, I meant what I said. I do really like you. VT/N: I... really..? Lucar Kaneshiroe: Yeah! Hey, I'm gonna have you fly up to see me so we can go on a proper date! :3

You felt your cheeks heat up while reading the messages,

Discord chat: VT/N: Y...you really don't have to do that Luca, I could pay my own way to see you! Lucar Kaneshiroe: Nope! I'm gonna pay for you to come and spend a couple weeks! " VT/N: There's no talking you out of this is there? Lucar Kaneshiroe: Nope! VT/N: Well okay but um.. we're not done with the collab Luca Lucar Kaneshiroe: ... SHIT!

You turned back to the collab, both you and Luca apologized for going silent and the collab continued, every time you noticed a nasty comment come up, it disappeared just as fast as it popped up. And each time a chat from a certain someone popped up;

Luca Kaneshiro [NIJISANJI EN]: Not today satan! VT/N IS POG! Don't tall about her like that!

꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷♡꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒦

I hope you like it~! I dunno if it's as good as it could be but I did my best~!

[rei-caldombra]

Yubisaki to Renren - Anime First Impressions Review

This review is based off the first 3 episodes of the anime and does contain spoilers. Please be aware that I have not read the manga and am not spoiled. 

It's been a while since I've watched a proper Shoujo romance anime. It's not the most common anime/manga demographic for me to check out but I have watched or read quite a few of them over the years and have loved most of them. Some of my favorites are Ore Monogotari!!, Kimi ni Todoke, and Ouran High School Host Club. As of now Yubisaki to Renren absolutely has the potential to be one of my favorites. I'm loving this show!

I really enjoy learning about the experiences of different people and am not super knowledgeable in the life experiences of deaf people. I am glad we are seeing more anime like this and Ranking of Kings that help enrich people's perspectives on disabilities. To me this show is incredibly engrossing and informative towards the deaf experience. In the first 3 episodes we have already gotten so much rich characterization and details into Yuki and her experience as a deaf and mute person. It brings up a lot of detail surrounding basic interaction as a deaf person. Such as how things that could are normal and inoffensive between friends like going up to someone from behind could have a different impact on someone deaf like Yuki. Her having that feeling that people are talking about her, even if she is not reading lips or was communicated.

I have to imagine this is a relatable feeling. Most people seem to be able to pick up on that type of thing to an extent, but I imagine people with disabilities like deafness are more receptive to it. Likely out of getting more attention towards them for being different and feeling excluded. Her wondering how Rin asked for his number and having trouble doing it is very sad, because she is unable to approach it in the same manner. It's great seeing how she goes about tackling problems differently. I appreciate them bringing up how she has hearing aids but still can’t hear. I was wondering about that as I figured you would not bother to wear them if they weren’t working, but I can see how there is still value in it even if Yuki only hears noises she cannot properly understand. I imagine there could be emotional reasons for wanting to wear them as well as well. I also did not know there were separate schools dedicated to teaching the deaf and hard of hearing. I had really only thought of individual tutoring, but it makes sense proper institutions dedicated to it exist. These would provide much higher quality of education to those hard of hearing, but it’s also understandable that it would make someone feel like they are in a protective bubble. Which is how Yuki felt. Another informative detail I like is how one girl in the deaf school called to Yuki verbally, reminding the viewers that there are varieties of deafness. Some have the capacity to speak clearly, some do to the best of their ability, and some like Yuki cannot or choose not to speak at all. It’s easy for people to stick to a simple idea of disabled people, so it’s great that this show is addressing the complexities of the condition. It’s especially great that it accomplishes this by showing rather than telling. I also like when Yuki brings up how the way people sign conveys emotion outside of the words being signed. It’s very cool to learn about how body language also comes through with signing. I had not properly thought about how signing would show bodily expressions the same as any other bodily movement until I saw it here. Such as how Oushi’s signing is aggressive while Itsuomi’s is soft. Yuki can read into someone’s personality based on how they sign. Just within these first few episodes this anime is filled with rich detail that get help you understand Yuki's experiences and empathize with her. It strongly succeeds in engrossing you in Yuki's world. All of these glimpses into how deaf people communicate and intake information is very informative and interesting. This on top of the sweet nature of the show makes it a lot denser than a traditional romance. I'm greatly looking forward to learning more about the life experiences of deaf people through this show.

I also think a strength here is that it takes the experiences of deafness with great care while also using it for jokes. I like the simple miscommunication humor of her not reading lips perfectly leading to her taking something the wrong way. This fits very well and is great for adding comedy in between the dialogue.

The romance side of things is also starting off strong. Itsuomi has me swooning over here with his smooth moves.

I can see the chemistry between these characters already. Both of them are people who desire to gain new experiences. Expanding your world seems like it is a central theme of the show. I really enjoy these early interactions. They feel fairly natural, being awkward in a way that doesn't feel forced or strange. It is natural for him to not know exactly how he should act around her, where it doesn't come across as negative when he acts how he normally does. I like seeing characters' dynamics and feelings toward each other grow. They are still feeling each other out and going with the flow. This really encapsulates the early stages of falling for someone. And these interactions are just so sweet. I love Itsuomi's personality of being very curious. Just within the first few episodes I can tell he has a lot to him and really like him. The fact that he head pets her too makes this feel even more like it was made for me. Watching these episodes really warmed my heart. I'm very interested in seeing the overarching theme of expanding your world be explored as the story continues.

I also really like the other two main characters so far, Oushi and Rin. Oushi seems like he will be the rough person who acts out of strong care. I like his interactions with Yuki, their catty rapport being funny while laying the groundwork of his overprotective behavior having the effect of being demeaning. I like this set up so far, feeling positive that there will be good execution for this issue. Rin feels like a good supportive friend. Her also having a crush at the same time as Yuki adds a lot to their interactions and gives her more to do than just be a wingwoman. I look forward to seeing how her relationships develop and if each of their crushes will cause any conflicts with each other in the future.

From my perspective the anime production seems to be very respectful and taking great care to portray the manga as great as possible. This is primarily shown through the animation quality for the signing. It comes across very smooth and has the finer movements portrayed well. Stiff animation would greatly harm the signing coming across properly in animation. I cannot speak for any removed or added detail compared to the manga, but I feel that the production truly believes in the importance of the visuals. And this elevates the show greatly.

I hope this show continues to be a sweet romance while getting into the serious issues it is setting up. I hope we get a lot of great growth for these characters and for the character interactions to continue feeling natural, rather than leading to forced melodrama. At the very least if it continues to be rich and enlightening, I will continue to love this show. Thanks for reading! I hope I talked about this topic well, please let me know if I came across negatively at all.

[chaoticgeminate]

A Future with You

Summary: Sometimes things happen that change everything, and the kind actions of a stranger help you at a low point in your life. Not only do you get to return that kindness but you also wind up happier than you've ever been.

Rating: M (Non/Semi-explicit smut content)

Pairing: Marcus Pike x gn!Reader (If you notice any descriptors please let me know kindly and I'll fix them)

Notes: This work is a part of the @pedrostories Secret Santa event and is a gift, I tried very hard not to imply any holiday the reader celebrates but included a holiday tradition from my giftee which is why there is a Christmas film on the title card. That being said:

Happy Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa, Merry Yule, Saturnalia Salutations to my Secret Santa giftee @browneyes-issac! I really hope you enjoy my gift, Lotus, this was a lot of fun to write ❤

A Future with You (6.7k)

“I’m sorry.”

Echoing, repeating, inside your head like a specter that wouldn’t leave you alone; the two words held none of the emotions they should have, the tone was blank and empty and had been delivered that way. Even now you could still see his stupid face looking anything but sorry, those green eyes lacking any empathy for what he’d done to you, and it hurt worse as all the ugly little thoughts you’d kept at bay were buzzing like a swarm of pests surrounding you.

You aren’t good looking enough, why would he choose Kaleigh otherwise?

You aren’t smart enough, you would have gotten that promotion sooner if you were, right?

You spend too much time working rather than being a good partner, he wouldn’t have to find affection somewhere else if you tried harder would he?

Each thought cut deeper and deeper, the aching in your chest bleeding out and making you feel cold, your legs pulled close to your chest and your face buried in your knees to hide the tears spilling over your cheeks. Around you the airport was bustling and loud but you couldn’t hear it, the endless number of conversations and bubbly pop music were muted by the grief and the voices of your own inner demons screaming at you. 

Someone touched you, the hand on your elbow gentle, but you hadn’t been ready for it; head snapping up to look, worried you’d missed your flight or something. Instead, there were gentle brown eyes, a soft smile fading into a look of concern, and the stranger pulled his hand back; his lips moved but you still couldn’t hear him over the roaring of your inner demons, now mocking you for bringing a stranger into your pity party.

He tried again and this time you paid attention, you forced yourself to focus on the here and now, you pushed those inner demons back knowing it would just make the intrusive thoughts worse later.

“Are you on the DCA flight? I can make sure you don’t miss it.”

“What?”

Good going, dummy, way to sound like a moron in front of this guy.

“If you- if you need to stay like that, I can make sure you don’t miss the boarding call. I don’t expect you to open up to a complete stranger, but I don’t want you to miss your flight because of the hurt.” Part of you, the pride that you still had left, bristled at how quickly he’s seen you and figured you out; wanting to deny the assist on principle that you were just fine without someone jumping in. That you didn’t need a fucking knight in shining armor or some shit, no matter how distraught you seemed to be.

He's just being kind.

This stranger was giving you more courtesy that your ex had in, well, probably a long time. He was giving you the chance to hurt without the worry that it would cause problems getting home, and you needed that more than you knew.

“Please?” Your voice was rough from the screaming fit just hours before, when Ryan had the audacity to ask you to give him half of your own savings -thank the fucking powers that be you had not combined finances yet- so he could buy an engagement ring for Kaleigh. His rushed proposal to you had been done with a cheap ring from a little crane game he’d won on your anniversary trip, it was cute and you’d been happy with it because it’d been a sweet proposal and just fit the two of you so well; now though it stung, thinking about the fact that he wanted to give Kaleigh the hallmark proposal and happy family.

A nod was all you needed to return to burying your face in your knees, to muffle your soft wheezy sobs in the plush fabric of your scarf -it was going to be cold in DC and you weren’t going to be the idiot unprepared for the weather- and just letting the emotions go. But this stranger didn’t just support you by promising the bare minimal help, he went and got a fresh bottle of water for you when you’d finished yours and even went and got you a small snack from one of the nearby vending machines when you’d told him you hadn’t eaten since at least two days before.

This man had put more care and attention into you in the span of two hours than Ryan had in two years.

Fuck you’re pathetic if a stranger is better to you than your ex was.

Marcus Pike, as he introduced himself eventually, was a genuinely good man and you had to admit you were kind of jealous of this Teresa person that was apparently flying out to DC in a week to follow him. He’d gotten a text from her that she was working on a case or something, that she’d call in an hour or two if she could, and that led to him telling you about her. But the jealousy you thought you’d feel that he was getting everything he wanted and you weren’t just… wasn’t there. If anyone deserved a happy marriage it was this good-hearted, sweet, man beside you who saw a stranger in pain and stepped up.

“So, uh, are you from DC or the surrounding area?” He was trying to make conversation no doubt, you hummed as you chewed on the bite of the meal you’d ended up buying now that your appetite was returning, and a part of you was at war with giving him such personal information when you’d only just met him today. But you didn’t have some of the same bad vibes that you usually got with creeps or pushy men; you had a feeling if you refused to answer he’d actually respect that.

“Surrounding area, though my promotion does come with a change of office to DC. I’m in Baltimore currently but I’ll be looking for a place in DC as soon as I get back since it’s an hour commute not counting the traffic. The week I got off was supposed to be for me to begin the process of finding residency closer to work, I had use-or-lose time that would’ve been lost as soon as I started at the new role so it just made sense to take it when I got the affirmative that I’d be promoted.” Marcus was nodding in understanding at your logic, you hadn’t expected to actually get approved for any houses or places but just being able to take your time touring the options had been the idea.

Marcus grabbed his phone and handed it to you after opening a browser window, the condo was a nice place and the cost was actually pretty decent for the size.

“I was initially looking here, since they’re one-bedroom places, but with Teresa coming along I decided to spring for a two-bedroom so we could have an office room.” You sent yourself the share link, already liking that it had designated parking and security cameras around the building, but what sold it was the fact that the interior wasn’t the modern aesthetic with sleek square edged and monochrome colors. The appliances were a lovely shade of royal blue, the furniture that came with the place was vintage and fun looking, and if that was Marcus’ taste it was just one more way he was nothing like any man you’d met.

“Thank you, I’ll check this place out.” You had a few more days left of time at least, since handling things with your ex had been done quickly once you knew what was actually going on, and since he was planning on staying here in Austin you’d even decided to take the L and mail his things back to him so he didn’t have to fly back and you could avoid him accusing you of purposefully withholding his belongings. That meant time to wander around DC and get an idea of where you might want to live, though this place was looking pretty alright.

For the first time in a while you didn’t even feel scared that a stranger would know where you potentially lived, the warning bells were absent and you didn’t know if that was because Marcus was just that good or because he was good at hiding it, and you decided to let yourself believe in him being a good person.

There were so many other things you had to stress about and this was something you didn’t want to add to the list.

As the boarding call started, after you and Marcus spent time talking about favorite books and films, he let you on ahead of him and waved from his seat near the front of the cabin as you moved toward the back. The curse of booking a late ticket, of course, and after setting your phone to airplane mode you decided to take the nap you knew you needed.

Marcus bid you farewell at the exit terminal in DCA while he was getting his phone turned back on, since you didn’t have to go through baggage claim there was no added wait, and you were off and in a cab toward the hotel you’d booked last minute in the city so that you could just stay and explore living spaces before heading back to your place in Baltimore.

The condo was finally furnished, it looked like your space, and all of the boxes of Ryan’s stuff had long since been shipped off and confirmed to arrive at Austin. Breaking the lease on your old place had been costly -his parents chose to cover the cost after the truth came out- but you were free, free of someone who saw you as a piggy bank and free to move on with your career and live the life you wanted to live. You wiped the sweat off your brow and decided to head down the road to the nearby diner, a bite to eat that you didn’t have to cook sounded great, and you had a few hours before your best friends would be here to help put your knickknacks and art up.

It had been months since you got back, months since you’d started at work in your new position, and even if finding the time to hunt for a place in DC was limited to weekends and unexpected breaks in your work weeks you’d managed to finally tour a bunch of apartments and condos in the area. In the end you’d settled on the place Marcus had shown you after getting the in-person tour.

Now as you faced the brisk fall weather your mood was much higher, you were living a fair distance from work that public transport and even just walking would be fine too, and now you were going to get some good classic food. Warm and soft lighting made you relax as you entered the eatery, it was a seat yourself joint and you were ready to take a seat at the bar when you spotted a familiar face in one of the booths, waving when he looked up from his phone screen; Marcus’ smile was blunted since your first meeting and you glanced at the bar a moment and walked over to greet him instead.

“Hey stranger, fancy seeing you here. Want company?” Not wanting to assume anything you couldn’t help but grin when his smile did shift to something warmer and more welcoming.

“Only if you want to.” You slid into the seat with a smile after he gave you the okay. “How have you been, since getting back to Baltimore?”

“Better, it’s still- there’s still plenty of hurt but I’m in a better place all around; especially now that I know the whole truth. I just finally finished unpacking and organizing my place here in DC, so I figured I’d celebrate. How about you? How’s the East Coast treating you?” Since he was alone and lacking a band on his left ring finger you avoided the topic of the woman he’d said was coming out here, he’d been so excited about his engagement and with how sweet he was you had expected his fiancée to be just as enthusiastic.

Marcus’ shoulders dropped a little and you didn’t even think before reaching out to take the hand he had on the table, offering a sympathy-filled smile, and his eyes dropped from your face to your connected hands before he let that smile fall away.

“East Coast as a whole is okay, but Teresa ended up breaking the engagement to be with the guy that she was in love with before me. I knew it wasn’t- I knew that as long as she was around Jane that she would choose him; we’d only been together a few months before I proposed, I didn’t want to lose my chance with her just by being transferred so I’d called in a few favors to get her a position here and hoped that being away from the guy that wasn’t returning her feelings would let her move on. With me.”

You knew he’d moved fast; he’d told you that, but you had seen shorter dating periods turn into long and happy marriages before. What upset you was that Marcus had put his heart, his hope, into someone that just wasn’t in a place to be that person for him and wasn’t willing to just tell him that.

“You saw what the two of you could be and wanted to try for that, Marcus, and that’s perfectly okay. You gave Teresa every chance to tell you ‘no’ and she didn’t take it for whatever reason, if she wasn’t able to commit to you entirely then she shouldn’t have accepted your proposal. If she wasn’t able to communicate with you, to try to move on from the other guy, then she should have said something. It takes two people to make a relationship work and it sounds to me like she wasn’t trying as hard as you were.”

When you looked up from your hands it was to a man with shiny eyes and tears threatening to fall, a man who had been hurt and needed someone who could at least understand the hurt, and you didn’t say anything when he used a napkin to dab his eyes gently. If anyone understood what he was feeling right now it was you, after all, given that the situations weren’t the same but there were some strong parallels. Him allowing himself to cry? To feel? You liked that about him, a lot.

“When Ryan proposed it was a rushed thing too, it was on our anniversary and he won a little plastic ring out of a crane game instead of the little charm bracelet he’d been trying for. He looked at it, looked at me, and then got down and proposed right there; almost made me think he meant to try for it for that reason and since our relationship had always been easy and never focused on the materialistic things, I loved it and it was sort of on brand. But he pulled away, after that, wasn’t involved in any of the planning unless I specifically asked for his opinion. I thought it was cold feet, or that he was just nervous because he didn’t know if his parents were able to make it to the wedding on the day we chose, but it turns out his childhood friend Kaleigh was newly single and he’d always loved her.”

Saying the story out loud made the anger lessen, now that you could see the signs clearer, even if the hurt was still there. How Ryan had always talked about Kaleigh’s clothes style, compared your hairstyles on special occasions to hers, and just being very attentive to her social media to the point that you knew more about Kaleigh than his own sister before you’d ended up opening a group chat with Hannah. A part of you also felt like you’d dodged a bullet, learning before you were married, because it meant that not only had it festered enough to do more hurt later but you had a lot more to lose in a divorce situation compared to Ryan.

His grip tightened, making you look up, and Marcus’ expression was one of understanding. Even without saying the words he knew that you were offering him support, that you knew his pain and would be the person he could open up to about it, and if it weren’t for your meals being delivered you were sure the two of you would have been able to just sit in comfortable silence.

“Ah, pancakes guy? Breakfast for dinner is something I haven’t done in a while.” You took a bite of your meal and Marcus shrugged, putting a good bit of syrup -the authentic maple syrup not the gloopy pancake syrup- onto the hubcap sized pancake along with a large dollop of butter. Your talk lightened to things in the area to do for fun, things in Baltimore to do for fun, hobbies you had currently and things you wanted to try and get into.

Marcus was genuinely a good person and creative as hell, watching him sketch you on a napkin in only a few minutes had left your face warming at the detail he managed to get into the little image. Only after you’d gone through a few refills, talked until you were sure your voice was going to be shot, and spent nearly an hour more than you planned there with him did the two of you decide to leave. Marcus paid for your meal -his insistence- and followed you back to yours where you brewed some coffee for him and let him lean in the doorway of your kitchen as the two of you talked about movies that you enjoyed.

By the time you both sat down on your couch, on opposite sides with you pulling your legs close, a small part of you was loath to let him leave. Marcus had proven before that he was attentive and kind with a big heart and knowing he was going to therapy -he’d glossed over it but you didn’t mind since he trusted you enough to even mention it in the first place- all it proved was that he wanted to heal and be better. You liked him, and even though your heart hurt, you were terrified of the idea of losing him because you wanted to take more time for yourself, but you didn’t want to push him into anything by rushing since he was going through the same heartbreak you were. 

“So, uh, you never said what you did for work. What brought you from Texas to DC? Politician?” Dropping the thoughts before they could ruin your night, choosing to needle him just a little, you watched the way Marcus’ nose wrinkled instantly. You knew he wasn’t but you were sure he’d be a good one, the kind of guy to push for what was right without forcing his lifestyle on others, and the idea of him putting any of those crusty old raisins in office in their place was a fun one.

“Nah, I’m not old enough or conservative enough to be a Texan politician. FBI actually, art crimes. I’m on the team of people that investigate when museums get robbed of art work or statues, sometimes we end up tracking things internationally depending on the thief. We also have to inspect and identify if things that pop up are authentic or if they’re fakes.” His explanation was delivered in an even voice and he showed you his badge while he was at it, your throat tightened and you felt the gooseflesh on your arms as the image of him apprehending a thief made your heart beat a little faster.

As if he couldn’t be more attractive, he had to be an FBI agent too?!

“That’s really incredible, I can’t imagine it was easy either. Did you have to get a degree in classic art before going to whatever FBI training is?”

Marcus laughed softly.

“I went to Quantico first, actually, my father was always set that as his firstborn son I’d be police or military or some role with authority. He could handle the FBI but it wasn’t until I was out of Quantico serving as a low-level agent that I pursued my Art Degree and transferred to Art Crimes as my hands-on credit hours. He still hasn’t forgiven me.”

“His loss, that is an amazing career to pursue Marcus.” You didn’t miss the way his smile brightened or how he hung off every word as you told him about your own career, how you’d not only gotten your promotion but quickly earned a pay raise on top of the raise that came with the new position, and you honestly couldn’t be happier now that you’d escaped “Hallmark Rom-Com” territory with your love life. After being able to focus solely on your career you’d managed to get into a much better place for yourself financially, which if you were being honest, helped bring you to a better place emotionally too.

Marcus stayed until he absolutely couldn’t and even then you made plans to meet up again on the weekend since he knew of a place that did drive-in movies, old black and whites and you hated that when you closed the door your heart was skipping and you couldn’t stop the way you did a corny little victory dance. It wasn’t a date, he hadn’t explicitly said it, but it was a start.

It was a date, the first of many, and Marcus was a breath of fresh air in the best way. He was kind, supportive, understanding, and an attentive lover. The whole ass package and somehow fate had put him in your path, not that you were complaining in any way, and this year was your first holiday together. You had plenty of fall-time dates last year trading apple cider and pumpkin kisses, snuggling up in the library together to just read or going to snuggle in his car at the drive-in theater, and there had been countless times you’d stumbled into the door of one of your houses where clothing ended up on the floor and sometimes you didn’t even make it to a bed.

You didn’t regret it, him, at all; a number of people tried to slow you down, since it hadn’t been so long after your break-up with Ryan before you and Marcus began dating, but their tunes changed when they actually met him and saw you two with one another. The main reason you hadn’t spent the holiday together as a couple yet was that Marcus had plans already with his family out of the country last year and you weren’t quite willing to intrude on that, even though you were sure about him, you didn’t want to crash a family vacation.

This year was yours, he’d promised, but that wasn’t looking like it would happen. Part of you couldn’t help but sigh as you looked at the calendar again, Marcus had to go to Austin for an undercover op and couldn’t even call you, he only had an approximation for when he’d be able to either call or come home. Since he was a Christmas guy you had used your key to his place and decorated his condo for the holiday for him, even getting out his fake tree and doing the entire set up, sneaking a few things of your own traditions around the main room before deciding it was done.

But all the tinsel and candles -LED since you weren’t exactly staying here to watch them- and décor couldn’t erase how it was lacking one Marcus Pike to fill the space with his sunny smile and warm affection. Even if you couldn’t celebrate the whole season with him, at the very least Christmas was enough for you if he could make it home, and as the days were crossed off your calendar it was looking less and less likely. Your own condo was significantly sparse on décor, trying to lighten your mood by making Marcus’ place look like a Christmas dream hadn’t really worked out the way you planned and his continued absence stole your spirit.

A chime from your phone made you huff softly and answer, if only to disrupt the cheerful ringtone, you knew it wasn’t Marcus since he had a custom ringtone set.

“Hey sharpshooter.”

Ryan’s parents had given you the title when you’d beat his entire family at the little shooting game at their town faire on your first visit, it was bittersweet hearing it again.

“Hi Drew, happy holidays.”

“Happy holidays, kid, just wanted to let you know that Nadine and I are proud as hell of you and that we miss you. I know it’s probably weird, your ex-fiancé’s parents calling to wish you happy holidays but you were family to us.”

“I don’t blame you or Nadine for what happened, but thank you for calling. Tell her I said hello and happy holidays, Drew.”

“Will do, sharpshooter, we wanted to pack up and send you some honey from the bee farm if you’re interested as a gift.”

“That would be a wonderful present, thank you.”

Even if you didn’t use it you could always re-gift it and pass business along.

“Good, you still have that drop box?”

“Yep! That’s perfect, Drew.”

“Wasn’t going to ask for your new address, figured in the New Year you’d want to move on for good.”

“I appreciate that, more than you know, but I’m glad I got to say a proper goodbye this time.”

“Me too, kid. Don’t settle for anyone that doesn’t respect you, you deserve the world.”

“I haven’t, Drew.”

“Even better.”

You knew when a conversation with Drew was over, when the sentences turned to one or two words, and despite this being one of the shortest conversations you had with the man you appreciated it all the same because now you could move on knowing that everyone from that point in your life was okay. You honestly felt lighter and almost jumped when you heard your door opening, knowing you’d locked it behind you, and your eyes widened when Marcus rounded the corner of the entry with a large grin on his face.

“Marcus!”

Your wail of his name drowned out the rapid tattoo of your footsteps as you hurried to hug him, to prove that he was really here, and he caught you in a tight hold and just held you close. His cologne was different, the facial hair was different, and the lingering scent of dry Texas air was different, and yet the feel of his arms around you and the warmth he seemed to just give off constantly was the same.

“I missed you so much, I’m so sorry I couldn’t call or contact you-“

“Don’t apologize, I know it was for your job, you were safer that way and it was required. You’re home, that’s what matters.”

“God, I love you, I love you so much, I booked the first flight home I could and spent extra hours in the office just to make sure I could come back and stay here.” 

Marcus didn’t argue at all when you dragged him through your apartment, mouth practically fused to yours as you worked to get him out of his clothes and into the shower, your own clothes joining his on the floor as you joined him under the stream of hot water. He proved how much he missed you, whispering praise and love into your wet skin, the slick glide of your bodies and heavy breathing laced with promises and traded affections between each throaty cry of his name were things you would remember for the rest of your life. He was insatiable for you, just as you were for him, and the shower round turned to soaking your sheets after stumbling out of the shower and away from your poor attempt at getting him clean.

He was all lips and tongue and hands, no inch of you was left untouched or unloved, and Marcus went as far as holding the back of your neck as he filled you just so he could make sure he could watch your face as he made you fall apart over and over again. His kisses were deep and intense, encompassing you entirely even as his hips rocked so slow and deep against yours, it was toe-curling and spine arching and yet you couldn’t get enough.

When you both were spent, wanting to just make out and talk and cuddle, Marcus migrated you to the couch after getting you both into comfier clothes where he nestled into the corner of your L shaped sofa and let you lay on him with his legs on either side of you, turning on some low background noise in the form of classic Christmas movies, and you couldn’t begin to care as Rudolph and Hermey met Yukon Cornelius since Marcus was here with you at last.

“I need to go decorate my condo; did you want to come help? You could just stay at mine until the holidays are over?”

A slow smile spread across your face when you realized that he hadn’t been home yet, he’d come to see you first, and you nodded before getting up to pack a bag to bring with you. Marcus helped of course, you even let him choose some of the casual stuff to pack, and other than stopping for a simple take-out dinner the ride was filled with him telling you about the sting operation. He’d posed as an art teacher to expose someone on the staff from not only stealing student’s work but for having some of the better talents recreate pieces that had gone missing and passing them off as legitimate.

You couldn’t be happier that he had pretty thick curtains so you couldn’t see the glow of the battery powered candles through them, asking him about his method of befriending the perpetrator to distract him as you let him handle the luggage so you could open the door, and Marcus’ face went slack when he stepped into the condo to see it fully decorated already.

“I- you- you decorated my condo?”

“Wanted you to come home to one less thing to do, it was a good way to help fight how much I missed you for a little while.”

Marcus’ slack expression warmed before he was tugging you onto the plush carpet, the net of Christmas lights you’d attached to his ceiling using command hooks twinkled like stars as Marcus kissed you deeply under them, and you couldn’t resist flipping him onto his back so he was looking up at the lights while you tugged off your hastily donned clothes again. Your bodies were dewy with sweat and the lights were reflecting off his skin and twinkling in his eyes, his lips dropped open as you held him in place so that you could give him nothing but pleasure, and Marcus’ hands gripped your hips to help move you as he watched you.

Even with his feet planted he let you lead, let you control the pace, and by the time you were shuddering and tensed up as you crested that high Marcus was seeking his own completion and guiding you with his hands until he was spent and shaking under you. He pulled you down and just laid with you under the Christmas lights that you’d put up, the warm condo -thank you automatic thermostats- was a little chilly but not enough to make you feel the need to get up just yet.

“I plan to do a lot more to you under these lights.” Marcus’ eyes were dark with mischief and desire as he made that promise and you were more than eager to let him see it through.

Waking up with Marcus’ warm body pressed close to yours kept you drowsy and comfortable, eyes heavy still even as you glanced at the clock, and while you didn’t have to get up early today there was definitely a motive involved doing so. For the past week or so Marcus had been sneaking out of bed before you to make you breakfast.

‘I like taking care of you, besides you’ll agree to move in sooner if the promise of breakfast and as many orgasms you want is on the table right?’

He was a caretaker, a giver, you knew that about him but so were you and he was starting to make you feel like you weren’t giving him enough. It was a conversation to have, sure, but that would come later. He barely stirred when you slipped out of bed, didn’t make a peep when you tugged on one of his shirts and a pair of underwear, and his kitchen was warm and quiet as you raided the fridge to start cooking right away.

He hadn’t seen you smuggle his gifts home, since you both had still worked up until the holiday, and the wrapped presents were carefully tucked under the tree as the coffee pot percolated and the pan you needed warmed up. Hiding them from him had been embarrassingly easy, for a man that was an FBI agent he seemed to have forgotten that his coffee table had hidden storage because you’d even set a little bit of a trap so you would know if he got into his gifts.

Breakfast was nearly complete when you heard the sleepy call of your name from the bedroom.

“I’m in the kitchen, Marcus.”

You’d thrown on an elf hat for some Christmas humor, hearing your boyfriend hum appreciatively as he walked into the kitchen, and he grabbed your hips as he came up behind you.

“Did Santa leave me one of his helpers for Christmas?”

A small chuckle escaped you as you nodded, watching him pour himself a mug of coffee, and his eyes drifted to the tree over the breakfast bar countertop. You felt the weight of his stare at the boxes in plain sight and resisted the urge to laugh, just barely, and while he didn’t say anything he did pinch your butt and set the table for breakfast.

Only after you sat down did you notice that he had added boxes to the stack and you rolled your eyes at the smug look on his face.

“What time are you going to call your parents?”

“Well, they’re home in Austin since I’m here and Nina is with her girlfriend’s family in Maine. So I figured around three since we’re an hour ahead. Gives them time to get up and have lunch, just relax a bit, you know?” 

“Alright, gives me plenty of time to clean up. And get pants on.”

The pair of you laughed, eating while conversing about any last-minute plans that either of you might want to do, and you only asked to watch White Christmas since that was a tradition in your family. Where it started you didn’t know but that had become the Christmas tradition, regardless of any other celebrations it was the only “Christmas-y” thing and this year Marcus was going to be there for the movie stream to meet your family too.

After dishes were cleaned up Marcus joined you in the living room and handed you one of your gifts, taking one of his to rest in front of him. You almost laughed because he picked the biggest of the boxes for each of you. The Razor Crest model in your hands was amazing, you would have to assemble it but that was a good rainy-day project, and Marcus looked thrilled when he began going through the canvas prints you had purchased for him to put up. Some of them were multi-panel pieces while others were single canvas pieces, but all of them were from the students he’d taught for his undercover op.

Your next gift was a new, beefy, set of over-the-ear headphones. These had noise cancellation or you could use the ambient mode to still hear things around you, you had only briefly mentioned these to him so for him to remember? You didn’t bother to mute your delighted cheer. Marcus grinned and then fell silent at the scrapbook you’d put in a pretty gift box; you’d only made and set removable labels for the pages with activities you wanted to do together. Things like going to certain museums or traveling to other cities, all optional but just things you thought were fun and cute.

There was even a page dedicated to the city of Casablanca, it made Marcus wipe the pooling tears out of his eyes.

“You- you want to do all this? With me?”

The unspoken words broke your heart. 

You see a future with me?

“Absolutely, I do, Marcus -as long as we do it together, we could change up every little thing on those pages. That’s just ideas and possibilities, we can always pick others.”

His last gift was the smallest of the boxes, and the most expensive, so when he opened it to a Cartier box you watched his eyes go wide before he was so lightly touching the face of the watch you’d chosen for him. It was vintage with a round face and black leather band, the exact one he’d been looking at when you’d gone on a date to a silent auction, and you’d been hiding it for months even before he left for the undercover op. Marcus made a little sound of disbelief and you couldn’t help but grin at him, earning a kiss so good your toes curled and you were ready to ignore the last gift of the night.

But Marcus sat you back down and handed you the box, looking so sure of himself, and when you opened it carefully you frowned at the small cardboard box that was apparently empty. Looking up and freezing at the sight of your boyfriend on one knee, your chest tightened up and the mix of joy and the small bubbling doubts after last time made your eyes water.

“Before you say anything, even if the answer is a ‘not right now’ that’s perfectly fine and it won’t hurt my feelings. I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you, whether we’re married or not, I just want you to have something to show you that I’m serious about you. You walked into my life needing help and then returned that same genuine kindness months later, you have never treated me like I’m too much and you’ve been so patient with me. I know I spent a lot of our relationship gone, which is why you do not have to say yes to this, but I want to marry you and I hope that someday you might want the same.”

“Marcus I can’t lie and say I’m not anxious about this, I am, but you know the reason why and have been patient with me through my healing process. I love you too, and I do want to spend the rest of my life with you, I want to be by your side and explore the world with you one day at a time. I know we can be amazing together, even with you gone you’ve never given me a reason to doubt you, and I would prefer a longer engagement but I’d be willing to sign the papers tomorrow since it’s you..” He slipped the band on your finger and kissed you, promising you as much time as you needed, and you said a silent prayer to whatever higher power was listening to thank them for allowing this man to cross your path when you needed him the most.

After wrapping paper clean up, fawning over gifts, and very pleasurable thank you’s were exchanged he tucked you against his side on the couch and flipped on Netflix so you could continue catching him up on the shows he’d missed while he was working and glancing at your new ring with hope and love warming your heart.

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[cidnangarlond]

can you give a summary or synopsis of fortunas character? I like seeing her but i know nothing about her!! Other than cid and her being Very Good Friends (joke)

YESSSS I'll give a quick lil rundown

So Fortuna Forsythia was the name she took when she left her family in the Skatay Mountains (where the Veena Viera are from) and was originally known as Petra Ymir! She has a sister named Sonja. Fortuna left home at about 18 shortly after her birthday longing for adventure and wandered for a bit until she came upon a small town. She stayed for a bit to help with hunting and an Elezen lancer named Ilya came into town and Fortuna fell in love instantly and begged him to teach her how to use a lance and he does! The romantic feelings are mutual but aren't together for long because he dies protecting the town from a giant goobbue and Fortuna also loses an eye during all this. She recovers and I'm always split between she shamefully goes back home and stays for awhile before setting off again or just wandering for another few years trying to teach herself the way of the lance before ultimately ending up in Gridania.

For that period between Ilya's death and coming to know Cid her emotions were very muted. Never smiled at all, very serious, didn't really laugh either, just very stoic. (This leads to a thing with the Scions and namely Thancred trying to get her to smile.) When she meets Cid she's very much despairing about falling in love again but fortunately our resident engineer has plot armor and we don't have to worry about anything. Unless Yoshi-P gets some ideas. But she and Cid have their first kiss in the Praetorium remember when it was an 8-man duty and not 4 and there were memes about how many cutscenes there were. I remember. There were so many. They removed all the good Cid cutscenes from Castrum and Prae but what IS good is I recorded them all. But they were good for my Cid/Fortuna agenda. They got married like right after Estinien-Nidhogg was defeated because to Cid he was not going to let Fortuna run off and do more crazy shit without first being able to call her his wife. (He left the ring at the Manufactory and Biggs and Wedge, who were covertly following them, had to throw him the ring box. Cid got too excited and left without it.)

Very close friends with Haurchefant so it was very sad for her when he died. Likewise good friends with Estinien because they are both Dragoons. Fortuna was solely a Dragoon up until the last of the Pandemonium raids dropped and then she (aka me) finally branched out into different jobs, like Dancer, Summoner, etc. Dawntrail was the first expansion she went into not as a Dragoon! Very big time for her.

Fortuna and Cid do have two children, one is a daughter named Yda who was born between the end of Stormblood and the beginning of the Stormblood patch quests (which I imagine there was a good few months in between them). Their son Fortuno (Cid was adamant a child be named after her and not him) was born between the end of Endwalker and the beginning of the Endwalker patch quests. So she was up there on the moon, pregnant. Yda and Fortuno will eventually have arguments of "WELL SHE WAS PREGNANT WITH ME WHEN SHE LIBERATED DOMA AND ALA MHIGO" and "YEAH? WELL SHE WAS ON THE MOON FIGHTING GOD WHILE PREGNANT WITH ME" you know how siblings are. Estinien frequently comes over for dinners and the kids love him he's uncle Estinien to them and lets Yda put bows in his hair and play tea party with her. He also enjoys playing with Fortuno and it all reminds him of when he was young in Ferndale before Nidhogg came through and is also reminded of his younger brother. Nero likewise comes through for dinner now and then because he enjoys Fortuna's cooking and in exchange he HAS to let the kids play with him. Play with the children or you aren't eating. He is teaching them to be too dramatic through play-acting and making up stories but we all have uncles or know someone's uncle who is supremely dramatic.

They do have a house somewhere don't ask me where they just have a house and it exists. When Fortuna is off saving the realm Cid brings the children to the Ironworks and everyone LOVES them so much. Tataru makes them cute outfits. The Scions all love them. Alphinaud and Alisaie are like younger siblings to Fortuna so she cares about them immensely and they take being aunt and uncle/godparents to Yda and Fortuno very seriously.

LET'S SEEEEE WHAT ELSE. Her patron god is Halone. Her favorite color is purple and her birthday is 1/15 (which is also my birthday and my favorite color). She is blind in her left eye. She is right-handed. She enjoys sweets but doesn't like to advertise it a lot. Her favorite food is really any variety of steak (medium or medium-rare). One of her favorite places aside from Ishgard because of the snow is the beach, she loves to swim. She likes to mine and likes to weave/craft and has contributed immensely to Sharlayan (through the custom delivery quests) as well as to the Ishgardian Firmament restoration. Her lucky number is 7. She loves roses and sunflowers.

Sorry I said this was going to be brief it was NOT in fact brief.. But hopefully you had fun learning about Fortuna :]