#weight loss tube diet

[lifechangingtips]

The KE Diet: Understanding the Ketogenic Enteral Nutrition Diet

The KE Diet: Unraveling the Science Behind Ketogenic Enteral Nutrition The KE Diet: Understanding the Ketogenic Enteral Nutrition Diet Introduction The KE Diet, short for Ketogenic Enteral Nutrition Diet, is an extreme form of weight loss that involves a tube-feeding system to induce rapid weight loss. This diet, developed by Italian doctor Gianfranco Cappello, gained attention due to its…

[murdrdocs]

torn at the seams

description. "and if we don't lose our virginities by seventeen, let's just lose them to each other, okay?" you were serious when you told STILES STILINSKI that in middle school, and now that you're both adults, and both still virgins, you intend to hold up your end of the bargain.

includes. SMUT MDNI 18+, loser! stiles (that's just canon), virginity loss for both parties, fingering, protected sex (hallelujah!), typical nervous stiles, teaching, lots of kissing, childhood friends

wc. 5.7k+

a/n: started this a yr ago and found it and finished it. for my bsf, happy (early) birthday! artwork is the kiss by edvard munch. title from cherry by lana del rey

From below, there was a soft thump of music, upbeat song after upbeat song following each other as whatever playlist your friends decided on played throughout the house. The floors and walls vibrate occasionally, giving you a faint idea of the beat. 

You would’ve focused more on it, maybe tried to figure out if it’s a song you’d pressured them into putting into the rotation, if you weren’t so distracted by the body steadily moving around your bedroom. 

You watch Stiles Stilinski, eyes trailing from the back of his faded shirt to the hand holding a red solo cup that you were 80 percent sure was half full of diet Coke. He walks around your bedroom, eyeing the pictures and collectible items you’d acquired over the years. 

Your own solo cup sat on your nightstand, temporarily living with more trinkets. A photo of you and friends, a few rings you didn’t intend to wear tonight, a tube of chapstick that usually sat on your lips in place of the lipgloss you wore tonight, a hand cream. The items you intended to use shortly were stashed under your pillow, purposefully put there for easy access. 

You had the urge to slide your hand under there and check their location, suddenly fearful that something had happened to them between the time you sat them there and went downstairs to join the party. 

But doing so would’ve been too obvious, so instead you sit still on your bed, shoes discarded and your feet folded under you. 

You continue to watch Stiles observe, your lips tugged into a small smile, remembering just how hyperactive Stiles could be. 

“And this picture. When was this?” he asks you. 

You lean forward a little, looking around his body whenever he steps off to the side. The photo in question is of you standing at an amusement park, just a year or so younger, a grin on your face as you stood in front of a popular attraction. 

“Early last year, my family trip.”

Stiles nods, understanding without details that every year your family went on a trip together, extended and immediate meeting at one location for at least a week. There were times when you were younger when you had to ditch plans with Stiles for your family. 

He doesn’t point out another picture. He rocks on his feet, amber eyes looking up at the ceiling. Suddenly, it occurs to you that Stiles is nervous. 

It’s different from how he used to behave when he was nervous as a kid. Then, he would stammer, gnaw on his bottom lip, tap his hands on the desk or his knee. Now his fingers subtly tap against the rim of his cup, his other hand stuffed in his pocket. He’s silent. He licks his lips instead of gnawing on them and the action directs your gaze right to them. 

You try not to stare, averting your eyes elsewhere. 

Scooting over to make room, you let your feet dangle off of the edge of the bed and pat the newly created space beside you. Stiles falters, glancing at your hand and then at you. It takes him a second but he eventually places his solo cup on your desk and skitters towards you.

The bed dips with his weight. He sits a little far from you, basically on the other end of the bed. It’s silent again. You both stare straight ahead. You wonder if he’ll speak first, so you remain quiet, waiting for him to make a move. When he doesn’t, you take a breath. 

“Do you remember when we were in middle school? And we made that pact?” 

You look over at Stiles in time to catch him thinking for a second, his eyes squinted and his lips parted. You see it come to him when he turns to face you. 

“You mean the whole virginity thing. If we didn’t lose our virginities by a certain age—” 17. If neither of you lost your virginities by seventeen. “Then we would …” he trails off, leaving the last bit in the air. 

You finish for him. “Lose it to each other.” 

“Yeah.” A beat, a moment where Stiles doesn’t say anything and neither do you. It’s then that you hear his fingers drum against the bed. “But … but that was just a stupid little pact. We were kids, y’know?” 

You shrug, turning your head to look over at him, fingers starting to twiddle in your lap. “Well, yeah. But I was serious. Were you not serious?” You don’t mean to sound as dejected as you do, but it comes out naturally, an accompanying pout forming on your lips. 

It feels a little manipulative, and you’re trying to get rid of it as quick as it appears, but Stiles already sees. 

Not expecting the effect on him, you’re slightly shocked when you see him start to worry a bit, nerves pushed to the side as he instantly attempts to soothe you. “Wha—Yeah. I mean, yeah. Of course, I was serious. ‘Were you serious?’ D-” He can’t continue his rambling when your lips are pressed against his, gloss finally ending up where you wanted it to. 

He hesitates and you start to worry that you overstepped a boundary. Before tonight, you and Stiles haven’t hung out since freshmen year. Lots of things have changed with you since then, and who knows what could’ve changed with him. Maybe he has a girlfriend, or maybe he was serious about the pact in middle school, but he isn’t serious now. Maybe he already lost his virginity and you’re just the late bloomer. 

You make the first moves to pull back, already planning to scoot to the edge of the bed, apologize, and down the rest of your liquor before going back downstairs. 

But then he kisses you back. Tentatively at first, nothing but a small press of his lips against yours, mimicry of a peck. It’s a tiny movement, but it’s all you need. 

You push yourself closer to him, your duvet rustling under your body. You place your hands in his flannel, fisting the fabric as his hands find your back, his palms resting flat along the curve. 

Eventually, the two of you peel apart, lips separating slowly, leaving both of you to look into the eyes of the other. 

“Was … is this okay?” Your voice is soft, but not because you’re shy. Your voice is soft because that’s how this moment feels—gently, soft, delicate. You feel comfortable in Stikes’ presence, and any timidness dissolves from your body. 

He takes a second, pretty brown eyes scanning your face with a look you’re not used to seeing on his face. His lips pulled into the hint of a smile at the corners, his eyes soft, a little lidded like they were the one time you got high freshman year. He looks relaxed in the way that he is in the morning right before he wakes up, with no stress present in his body at all. Knowing that he’s like this because of you makes you feel giddy inside. 

Stiles blinks and cups the back of your head with one large hand. He pulls you closer and places his lips back on yours. 

Kissing Stiles is nice, to put it simply. 

He tenderly kisses you with attention. His lips, smoother than you thought with the faint taste of cherry, glide over yours with precision. He doesn’t kiss you like he’s starving, but he kisses you like he’s appreciative. Like he’s as thankful for this moment as you are. 

You’ve always imagined yourself in this position. 

During late-night talks with your friends where you discussed crushes each of you would never get over, Stiles was always the first person on your mind. When you lay in your bed at night, sleep just out of reach, you’re only able to get closer to it with the thought of someone—with the thought of this. 

Truth be told, you didn’t expect him to kiss so well. His lips move with a bit of hesitation as if he’s still testing the waters, but his hold on you—large hands on the back of your head and the middle of your back— is secure. He keeps you in place, not like you’d want to be anywhere else. 

You move even closer until your knees knock together. You don’t know if it’s a reaction, but Stiles’ hand moves lower until his pinkie finger is against the small strip of skin left bare by your shirt and your jeans. His touch is warm, and it ignites something low in your belly, making you aware of a feeling you’re suddenly desperate to reach. 

You start to kiss him with a little more fervor, the change instantly picked up by Stiles who matches your energy. He guides both hands onto your back, sliding them lower until they rest at the top of your ass. He circles his grip around solely your hips and digs his fingertips into the meat of your skin. When he tugs you closer to him, there’s nowhere left for you to go. It’s only logical that you straddle his hips instead. 

You throw one leg over both of his, giving him unobstructed access to slide both of his hands down to your ass, the palms cupping the shape through the denim. You want to keep kissing him, but the small inhale of air through your nose isn’t doing much, so you pull away, instantly making it your goal to get as much air as you can as quickly as possible so you can go back to him. 

Stiles, though, wastes no time, his lips latching onto the skin around your jaw, kissing down your neck, reaching your collarbone. You’re incredibly thankful that you decided to wear a revealing shirt tonight, leaving the tops of your tits visible, open to Stiles’ lips. He presses kisses into the tops of your breasts, spurred on by the way you grip the back of his head with both of your hands. You throw your head back and breathe languidly, taking in slow gulps of air and letting them out even slower. 

The straps of your tee shirt fall down and then Stiles stills. You dip your gaze down to look at him, noticing how he’s staring straight at where he’s been pressing his lips. Your shirt still sits over your tits, but barely. If you relaxed and leaned forward a bit, the fabric would fall around your waist. 

Stiles looks up at you, his eyes wider than they have been all night as if all of it is suddenly dawning on him. “Are you sure? Do you want to stop?” 

You shake your head, hands starting to twitch at the back of Stiles’ head with anticipation. You run them up, fingers curling into his hair. Stiles’ eyes flutter shut and the image is breathtaking. It makes you wonder if he likes his hair pulled. Something you’ll have to try out eventually. 

“I’m sure,” you assure him, “but if you want to stop, just tell me, okay?” 

His small smile makes your chest a little tight, a deep breath just barely getting rid of the feeling. 

“Shouldn’t I be saying that to you?” His head tilts and he looks fucking adorable. You want to see Stiles like this as often as you can, even outside of the capacity of fucking around. 

You shrug, hoping you look half as cute as he does. “It can go both ways, can’t it?” 

And you can’t resist him any longer, needing to have your lips back on his. It’s quickly becoming an addiction, kissing Stiles Stilinski. You kiss him with hunger this time, tasting the lingering vanilla Coke on his tongue. Your teeth clack a few times, the sound and feeling both unpleasant. So why do you keep letting it happen? 

It’s definitely because you’ll let Stiles do anything to you. That’s why you’re completely pliant even when he flips you over. 

It’s quick, and a little devoid of grace, but it does the job. 

You end up with you on your back, legs bent at the knees and spread open. The warmth of Stiles kneeling between your legs is comforting. It’s nice to feel crowded like this, but it doesn’t last for long. Stiles is kneeling between your legs for only long enough to kiss you once, and then he stands at the foot of your bed, staring down at you. 

You know you look a little disappointed, a pout probably on your lips, but when he leans down and reconnects your lips one more time, you’re smiling again. As he pulled away the tip of his nose brushed against yours as his eyes opened just enough to stare fondly at you. 

“I’m gonna take your pants off. Is that okay?” He asked you, hands already settling on the fly of your jeans. 

You nodded, your noses playing with each other with the movement. Stiles’ need for consent was driving you crazy in the best possible ways. It’s like you could feel arousal steadily gushing out of you, increasing tenfold when he stood up fully and positioned his hands at the waistband of your jeans. 

His eyes found yours once more, seemingly checking for any indication that you wanted to turn back. There was none deep in your body, and you hoped that your face hadn’t betrayed you and displayed any apprehension. To ease your worries, you gave Stiles a gentle smile, feet digging into the bed beneath you as you lifted your hips just a bit. 

Stiles took your answer in stride, slightly shaky hands peeling the button out of the hole, then sliding your zipper down until you saw the cherry-printed fabric of your panties. Stiles took a manual breath at the sight, hands halting as he just stared for a few seconds. He blinks twice, then hooks his fingers in your waistband and tugs your jeans over your ass, down your thighs and legs, and off around your ankles and feet, leaving you half-bare in front of your lifetime crush. 

You’ve always known that Stiles is one to stare, ogle even. When you were in the same fifth-grade class, he would spend lunch looking across the room at a certain redhead. When you constantly watched a horror movie together the summer before sixth grade, Stiles would shamelessly stare at the main character, even when she had one of the most brutal death scenes you’ve ever seen. 

Ogling is something Stiles is known for in your book. But having that directed towards you feels different. It makes you a little nervous, teenage jitters fluttering low in your belly, making you wring your fingers together and gnaw on your bottom lip. 

Stiles, realizing that he’s staring for once, takes a breath, his hands hovering at your hips before it reoccurs to him that he’s allowed to touch you in a moment like this. You’ve permitted him. 

His hands shake as they approach your hips, but they steady when warm flesh meets warm flesh. 

“You’re so pretty,” he tells you, voice soft and earnest. The moment is tender, it’s vulnerable, and it makes you slightly uncomfortable. 

“I’m not even naked yet.” It’s your attempt at a light joke to ease the heavy tension that’s suddenly painted itself on the walls of your room, surrounding both of you, trapping you in the very thing you’ve wanted since you were young. But having it makes you uneasy, the uncharted territory suddenly a whole lot scarier up close. 

For once, Stiles doesn’t take the bait. He doesn’t crack a joke back, he doesn’t make you double over in laughter with his sarcasm. His amber eyes look at you, his pink lips curl up into a smile, and he tells you, “You don’t have to be naked to be pretty. You’re beautiful.” 

And you’re sure that your friends will tell you that it’s a little cheesy when you tell them every single detail of this moment, but you don’t care about that right now. Right now, your heart is soaring in your chest and your entire body is alight and you need Stiles Stilinski in ways you didn’t even think were possible. 

Your breath hitches. You lick your lips. 

“Stiles,” your voice is softer than you intended, it makes the moment even more tender. His eyebrows lift and you continue. “I need you to touch me. Please.” 

He wants to, you can tell he wants to. But something is holding him back and you think you know what it is. 

“I can teach you how. I can tell you what I like.” Not like you know much, either. Only things you’ve learned from your own explorations. 

He nods, eager, and his hands find the hem of your shirt. “I wanna all of you. Is that okay?” 

Again with the consent. It makes your vision swirl for a second, two blinks bringing Stiles back in focus as you nod and sit up completely, arms over your head so Stiles can take the top off. 

Your bra and panties are the only garments left, and you look down at your frame, a surge of confidence overtaking you as you reach behind you and unclip your bra. 

It falls and the sound Stiles makes would be comical if it weren’t for the situation. Actually, it still is comical, you just stifle your laugh for his own sake. 

His pretty eyes are having some serious tunnel vision, eye line straight at your tits. You sit a little straighter, puffing your chest out just enough to make you question if drool is starting to pool at the corner of Stiles’ lips. 

You know that this is the first pair of tits Stiles has seen in person and the revelation makes you even more proud of the set you sport. 

You eye Stiles’ frame, suddenly all too aware of the stark contrast in clothing. 

You squint at him accusatively. “Are you gonna even the playing field?” 

He blinks at you dumbly once, twice, and then he looks down at his dusty blue shirt. “Oh!” 

He rushes to throw his flannel off and does the same with his shirt off, barely even giving you enough time to do some admiring of your own before his hands fumble with the buckle and zipper of his cargo pants, his legs were suddenly useless as he awkwardly stumbles out of his pants. When he stands up straight, there’s a proud smile on his face that makes you giggle just a little, and just that one moment eases any tension or nerves you are feeling. 

Because this is Stiles. Your Stiles. The kid with the hangout house who would always invite you over after school for movie marathons. The kid who would quickly let you copy his homework before the teacher got to you. The kid who would always wave to you in the hallways, even when your cliques were completely separate and you hadn’t properly spoken for months. 

And now he’s watching you climb further up your bed, following after you, a hungry gaze in his eyes as he trails his eyes over your body from head to toe. 

His hands find your hips once more, his touch light as he trails it down. His fingertips graze over the tops of your thighs, then they find your inner thighs. His touch makes your legs part more, some reference to the Red Sea hidden in there deep beneath all of your all-encompassing hormones. 

Stiles watches between your legs while he brings two fingers to your center. They trail down, separating your lips, letting the tips of his fingers add pressure that already has you wanting more. You gasp, just a small sound that’s accidental, and Stiles licks his lips, a determined look in his eyes. 

It’s a sudden movement when he pulls your panties down and off, tossing them at the foot of the bed where the rest of your clothes sit. There’s not even a moment for you to even imagine being insecure or uncomfortable with your bare skin. Stiles is already positioning his hand at your bare cunt, fingertips just millimeters away from connecting with your skin. 

He wants to act, you can see it, but he doesn’t. Instead, he waits, he hovers, and he glances up at you. “I … I don’t,” he takes a second to breathe, and you let him finish. “What do I do?.” 

There’s just the smallest amount of shame hidden beneath his words, but you don’t let it exist much longer when you soften your eyes. 

You sit up, reaching out for him. “Stiles,” his eyes lift to connect with yours, the furrow between his eyebrows starting to relax. “There’s nothing to worry about. Okay? I want you, like really bad, if you can’t tell.” There’s just enough amusement in your tone to ease the tension, Stiles’ lips turning up into a satisfied smile. 

He leans forward, presses his lips to yours once, and then slides his middle finger into you, slow and steady, met with just enough resistance to showcase your inexperience. His pace is slow, almost tortuous as Stiles slides the single finger in and out. 

The depth that his slender finger reaches is enough to have you begging for more. You lift your hips from the bed and push your pelvis out toward his hand, with a plea for another digit leaving your lips. 

Stiles easily complies, sliding his ring finger in to join his middle. The stretch burns for a second, but you’re fucking dripping at this point, and the haze in your mind combined with the lubrication prevents any possible discomfort. Instead, you’re focused on directing Stiles, directions filling the air along with your moans. 

He listens easily, something you’re more than thankful for, especially whenever his fingertips brush against a spot that sends a tingle up your spine, and he’s finding the spot to abuse over and over again as soon as you tell him where it is. 

When your eyes peel away from the ceiling, and you’re able to keep them open enough, you connect with a set of warm brown that lights your body. Stiles’ eyes are so attentive. You don’t think he’s been looking anywhere but at your face this entire time, despite your sheer nudeness. His lips are parted, still glistening with your gloss and saliva. His eyes are wide, never straying from you, eyebrows raised just enough to give the look of innocence. 

But nothing is innocent about the way his free hand is palming his dick through his briefs. 

Your eyes find the tent accidentally, a blink that sends your gaze downward for just enough time for you to pick up on the bulge beneath checkered boxer briefs. You can’t make out the size from here, especially not with the slight blur in your vision, your eyesight unsteady even as you try to blink it away. 

You start to speak, to ask Stiles for what you really want, when he does, too. 

“I wanna feel you.” 

“I wanna taste you.” 

Both of you sit still, Stiles’ fingers stopping, too. He stares at you as if he’s shocked that the words came from his mouth, and there are three blinks shared from each of you before your hips move again, chasing a high you had briefly forgotten about. 

“Can we do that next time?” The words leave your mouth surrounded by gasps, little breaths that prove how worked up you already are. 

“N…Next time?” His stutter is cute, a little flattering, and you’d spend more time thinking about it if you weren’t on the cusp of an orgasm. Stiles has started moving his fingers again, pace just a little faster, fingers starting to curl at an angle that has your hands fisting the sheets. 

You nod, muscles starting to tense. “Yeah. Next time. Just need you so bad right now, Stiles.” 

“Yeah.” He nods, stares at you, and then nods once more. “Okay. Yeah.” You’re close, so very close, and then Stiles—overeager, enthusiastic, about to blow his pants Stiles—pulls his fingers out.

The noise that spills past your lips is completely accidental, almost guttural. It’s deep, and comes from the part of you that’s so obviously frustrated (the part of you that’s purely hormones and no logic). Stiles looks startled for a second, a string of curses coming past his pink lips as he fumbles off the bed and towards his pants. 

“Shit. Were you about to cum? I’m sorry, fuck, that’s totally my bad.” He’s speaking to you, but his eyes are watching his hands which ransack his pockets. He doesn’t find what he’s looking for, the thud of jeans and a leather wallet hitting the floor alerting you. 

“What is it?” Your tone is a little more bitter than intended, but you’re disastrously horny and Stiles is under too much duress to notice. 

“I don’t have a condom,” he tells you, voice wobbling like it’s the worst news in the world. Like he’s telling you about the impending doom that’ll fall onto this plane of existence. His face is the most serious you’ve ever seen, and it’s a look you don’t really like on Stiles’ usually happy-go-lucky face. 

You don’t bother replying as you dig your hand under the pillow, ignoring how Stiles stares at you like you’ve lost your mind. 

It’s not until you whip out the two condoms you have, pinched between your middle and pointer finger like you’ve seen in countless movies, that Stiles’ face relaxes. 

“I came prepared.” You’re proud when you say it, happy that your anxiety-ridden over planning paid off in the end. 

Stiles looks relieved, too, quickly resuming his previous spot with one of his hands reaching out towards the aluminum packet between your fingers, except this time without his boxers. 

You try not to stare, truly, but it’s hard to keep your eyes from tilting down to look at his hard dick between you both. You're trying to calculate the length-to-girth ratio, making educated guesses on just how much pain and how much pleasure you’ll be in, but you’re just too busy taking it all in. 

Looking at the thick happy trail that leads down to the patch of pubic hair resting above his dick. His abdomen is tight, something you’ve known from the times he’s changed in front of you, too busy ranting about Coach Finstock to notice the way you’d stared at him. Now, you don’t care if he notices. Because Stiles is fucking hot, even more so in his position. 

His eyebrows politely furrow when you pull the aluminum out of his reach, his lips starting to form a question that you already started to answer. 

“Let me put it on. Please?” 

Stiles short circuits, you can see it with the way he dumbly blinks at you. It takes some prompting from you—a simple raise of your eyebrows—for him to nod, retracting his hand and sitting back on his heels.

“Go right ahead,” he confirms, his hands resting on his thighs. 

 You rip the packet open and pull the condom out, throwing the aluminum in the general direction of your nightstand, leaving it there for you to deal with afterward. Placing your fingers over the condom in a mimicking shape, you press it onto the tip of Stiles’ dick, instantly cataloging the way it’s just barely flushed the same color of his lips with a bead of nearly translucent pre cum drooling off to the side. 

The pre smears over his skin as you glide the condom down, allowing yourself to feel the warmth of Stiles’ dick in your hand as you go down. You don’t see it, not when your eyes are staring intently at the cock in front of you, but Stiles’ eyes have fluttered closed above you. His lips have parted, his nostrils flaring just a bit with the exhale he lets out. He’s getting off to you putting a condom on him, and you only catch the tail end of it when you throw a curious glance up at him once the condom is seated completely over him. 

“Good?” 

He nods, opening his eyes to stare down at you. “Fucking great.”

You lay back, spread your legs, and let Stiles back in. 

He hovers, asks you if you’re okay, and as soon as you nod, he presses the tip of his cock against your entrance. 

When your friends ask you about it later, when they press you for details and inevitably come to the question that everyone wonders about, you’ll tell them that it hurt. Because it did. More uncomfortable than anything, a feeling that you had to breathe through. Luckily, Stiles was there coaching you through it. 

Demonstrating breaths that he repeated with you, gently nodding even when his face screwed up. You could see the way he was holding himself back, the veins in his arms prominent as he held your hip with one hand, the other pressed into the pillow beneath your head. 

“Keep going?” he eventually asked you. Excitement clearly flooded his eyes when you nodded. 

He gave you slow thrusts, deep and meticulous as if he were terrified of hurting you, and he was. He kept glancing from the sight of where the two of you were connected up to your eyes, watching attentively for any sign that you wanted to stop. 

But it never came. After the initial discomfort, you hooked a leg over Stiles’ back. It’s like a switch flipped, telling you that you needed as much Stiles as you could get. He was in you, yes, and he had his hands over your body, but it wasn’t enough. 

Stiles could give you his all and it still would never be too much. 

“More?” 

You nodded. “More, please.”

Stiles was eager to obey your request. He didn’t give it his all, you could still feel the restraint in each of his thrusts, but he gave you more. He drove into you with a little more power, holding his punches towards the end. The drag-out happened faster, as did the slide-in. 

It was a steady pace, rhythmic enough to provide stimulation. You won’t cum from just this, it’s obvious to you, but this is good. It puts a tickle in your lower belly. One that flutters around your insides, twisting them every so often. 

You feel so good, euphoric, even. At this moment, you understand the claims of post-sex glow. How could you not glow after this? It’s like Stiles is a fucking natural. There are a few moments where he’s a little off, but he picks up where he left off. He seems confident, and undoubting of his abilities, and it only makes everything better. 

Stiles groans and you’re brought back. You stare up at him, taking in as much as you can. The freckles and moles dotting his face and shoulders, the slight sunburn he has over his cheeks and the bridge of his nose, how his hair falls over his forehead, a few strands sticking to his pale skin. 

He’s so pretty. You don’t know how you ever thought you would have gotten over him. After this, you don’t think you ever will get over him. 

He leans down and knocks his forehead against yours. 

“You feel so good,” he admits. He sounds so honest and it turns you on. 

You curl your fingers in Stiles’ hair, pulling only a bit, but the reaction is still there. The sound he makes resembles a whine. It’s addicting. You want to hear it again. 

So you pull Stiles further down and suck on his jaw, combining it with another gentle pull of his hair. He doesn’t make the same sound, not immediately. At first, he moans, clean and simple, and then your cunt flutters around him and he whines again. 

It’s such a pretty sound. 

He starts to fuck into you messily, lacking any of the precision from before. His thrusts become more shallow, and you watch his features relax. 

“Are you close, Stiles?” you ask him, although you think you know the answer. 

He nods. “Yes. Yeah, ‘m so fucking close.” 

He takes his hand off of your thigh and searches. You don’t realize what for until he finds your hand. More fumbling and then your fingers are interlocked. Stiles presses your hand back into the pillow, the secure weight of his own hand keeping it there, and then he presses his lips to yours. 

He kisses you for a second, and you’re able to reciprocate for the sole moment. But you’re close, too. You can barely reciprocate when you’re as focused on your own orgasm, everything else pressed to the back of your mind. 

You use your free hand to tweak your clit, speeding your pace up when you realize that Stiles is just a few thrusts short of cumming. 

When he does cum—shooting into the condom with a final thrust, his forehead resting on your sternum as his grip on your hand tightens—you’re not far behind. Stiles weakly thrusts into you a few times and it’s during the second one that your muscles seize, an orgasm unlike anything else you’ve ever felt taking over your body, your middle finger absentmindedly rubbing against your clit as you let the orgasm wash over you. 

It takes a minute for both of you to come down. Stiles stays hovered over your body, his forearm keeping him up as he relaxes the lower half of his body onto yours. A couple of minutes pass before he even makes an attempt to move, and even when he does, he keeps your hands interlocked. 

He speaks first. “Please tell me that was as good for you as it was for me.”

You nod, unable to do anything other than blink up at the ceiling for a second. Eventually, you tell him, “Yeah.”

It’s not much, which Stiles is quick to comment on. “Are you sure? You don’t sound sure.”

“‘m just a little out of it right now, Stiles.” When you turn your head to look at him, he’s smiling like he’s proud of himself. You scoff, weakly kicking his shin. “Don’t be a dick about it.”

“Sorry. I’m just definitely gonna be thinking about this for a while.”

[cannabiscomrade]

This is a hurdle I’ve been seeing a lot lately now that I’m learning more about tubie life but

Fat people can require feeding tubes

Fat people can be malnourished

Fat people are deserving of enteral/parenteral nutrition and the current standard of qualifying for alternate nutrition often demands that fat people face a more extreme depletion of nutrition before they’re given the same interventions as mid-size and skinny people. One of the determinations of tube placement is involuntarily losing 5-10% of your body weight within 6 months, which can be a significant impact for someone whose starting weight is 220lbs vs 120lbs. Starvation can still send the body into metabolic acidosis/starvation ketoacidosis long before the bigger person hits that 5-10% lost threshold.

Weight loss/diet culture compounds with this because any weight lost by a fat person is often seen as a “good” thing and not documented as a medical problem or a negative symptom. I lost so much weight before my tube was placed that I am now mid-size, and it has already had an impact on my treatment. Most nurses and other healthcare providers are now shocked that I’ve lost over 60lbs in a few months, instead of congratulatory. I’m no longer “looking great”, I “look sick”. Despite that, I still had another nurse look at me and say “you look like you can eat and drink, why do you have a feeding tube?” Sorry- I didn’t know you could just look at me and determine that, considering my stomach is paralyzed.

Enteral feeding is also not even developed to be accessible for larger people. G/GJ tubes have approximately 10cm of tube designed for use inside the body (stoma). Fat people sometimes need to move straight to total parenteral nutrition because the devices themselves lack accessibility. TPN is associated with higher risks than enteral feeding and is often used as a “last resort”, but yet a lot of larger people don’t have another option.

[cherrydi3tcoke]

my poem about anorexia:

"ana"

my caved in chest

and chicken arms

my pencil thin legs

and all my scars

my hollowed out cheeks

the rituals begin

the bags under my sockets

the definition of my chin

the fatigue every morning

the dizzy every night

the hunger pain

and the shivers

triggering myself

ana is the boss

find a way to cope

weight loss

decreased testosterone

or the absence of your period

workout routines

food diaries

nausea

sudden death

making others worried

shortness of breath

constipation or diarrhea

cut out food groups

weigh in every day

osteoporosis

my hair falling out

lanugo on my skin

bruises on my legs

my collarbones thin

my spine visible

my sternum is too

my bicep non-existent

daydreaming about my meals

every calorie counting

working out for hours on end

stomach flat

unable to keep a friend

a kilo or a pound

obsessed with the numbers

check each ingredient

water instead of oil

unsweetened almond milk

or a rice cake

oatmeal

scared to attempt to bake

blueish fingers

yellow-tinted skin

anemia

distorted self-image

feeding all my friends

counting while I eat

portioning myself

starving is my treat

women

men

children

and teens

big

tall

short and small

haunted by her curse

"have you eaten today?"

"I'm worried about you"

"Do you want some food?"

"Eat a burger"

memorize the macros

"i am not a dog, food is not my treat"

cry yourself to sleep

"but I've seen you eat"

hours in mirrors

isolate from others

heart palpations

and restless nights

incurable thirst

intermittent fasting

binges or purges

all effects are lasting

normal on the outside

dying on the inside

questions from passersby

self-harm

"just one more hour"

"just one more meal"

"i already ate"

"it's not that big of a deal"

suicidal thoughts

being underweight

scared of being healthy

scared to get too sick

feeding tubes

hospitalization

thinking about food

hyperventilation

racing thoughts

loneliness

using laxatives

diets

going to the gym

going for a run

bodychecking

never having fun

infertility

cracked, dry skin

thin, brittle nails

weakened teeth

ruining my life

ruining my relationships

ruining my future

unable to eat a bag of chips

eating disorder speaks in my place

therapy

"just eat"

excuses for each meal

obsessed with my intake

obsessed with the math

obsessed with my weight

following this path

ice

water

gum

coffee

hoping that they notice

never tell a soul

hide it all from others

staring at my empty bowl

atypical or not

never feeling valid

covering my body

starving till I'm on my deathbed

recovery is useless

"i want to stay this way"

I'll have to fight my whole life

to keep her voice at bay

searches on the Internet

headaches

vitamin deficient

aspartame

comparison

"no cal is better than low cal"

refeeding syndrome

"I'm not good enough"

"once on the lips forever on the hips"

quick ways to lose weight

calculate my BMI

freak out about what I just ate

hide my secret

hide my body

keep on the low

till I'm skin and bone

ana,

oh how she will lie

she doesn't want you to be skinny

she wants you to die.

-zsc

[wainwrightjakobshammerlock]

What I think disability aids made by Borderlands gun manufacturers would be like. CW for mentions of systemic ableism and weight loss.

Atlas: Sleek and fancy, but also expensive as hell and prone to accidents. Sort of like IRL fancy prostheses or wheelchairs - they seem cool but are actually kinda sucky and very pricey. Don't expect the average Promethean to afford one. Though in this case, it's because they're often loaded with purely experimental tech that was probably shipped too early.

Hyperion: They make a few prosthetic and implant models and that's it. Pretty much all their stuff is aimed at their own employees trying to get "ahead" and not actual disabled people, so give up trying to find one fitting your particular needs. At least they're pretty fucking sturdy (but not against hacking). And no, they haven't thought of adopting those exoskeletons their engineers use for other needs.

Maliwan: Similar to above, but aimed at their general customer base instead. These guys are hipsters who try marrying form and function, and in many cases that means augs of some sort. I wouldn't really call them transhumanist though, that implies respecting bodily autonomy, human rights and not being ableist; these guys would sell arms with tracking chips and neural interfaces that fry your brainstem if you don't pay the subscription fee. And then tell you to lose weight with the new fad diet their marketing department cooked up. The hoverchairs and flavored chewelry are pretty great, tho.

Dahl: They wouldn't. They claim to be reliable but they're actually the biggest cowards in the Six Galaxies. If one of their soldiers loses a leg or something that's grounds for being (dis)honorably discharged. What exoskeletons or other devices they make are purely for war. Plus, the one Dahl employee we see having a prosthesis (Helena Pierce) doesn't seem to have a Dahl brand one. Aside from weird metal rank implants and funky gun-inspired fidget cubes they don't do much in this department.

Torgue: Expect everything to be painted like a Hot Wheels toy and probably explode somehow - either on you or on your enemies. All the mobility aids have jets attached for either smacking ableists with great force or speeding through town. I think Torgue himself wears a hearing aid (from all the explosions) and it looks like a fucking microphone with car parts on it, complete with exhaust.

Jakobs: Steampunk baybeee!!! Of course, the subgenre of said steampunk depends on the quality of the aid. The most basic ones are IRL Victorian era metal arms: flat, spiky, inhuman, but still quite ornate. The ones custom-tooled for execs and their families (looking at you, Alistair Hammerlock) are more "sleek" steampunk, with fine chassis of signature Jakobs brass and filigree engravings. They also make genuine wood canes with organic rubber grips that will outlive you if you take proper care of them... which is definitely shown in their price tags. The Jakobs stim toy line is half weird gear contraptions, half competition with Dahl's fidget cubes.

Vladof: Heavy, clunky, dieselpunk style. But damn if they aren't effective. A standard Vladof boostchair could break through a wall and be completely unharmed. A Vladof AAC device looks like an electron tube supercomputer that you have to haul around in a cart. That's all I really have to say here.

Tediore: I have no idea.

[p-artsypants]

This has been on my mind for a while so I have a question:

If you’ve never heard of it, Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome is pretty much just what it sounds like. It is when a woman develops cysts on her ovaries, or has the potential to. These cysts often throw hormonal balance out of whack throughout the entire body. Pregnancy-like symptoms can occur, as well as heightened testosterone levels.

Common symptoms of PCOS are:

Excessive body or facial hair

Insulin resistance that causes rapid weight gain and weight that can’t be shed even with proper diet and exercise

Excessive weight around the gut, a beer belly or inner tube

Hair loss on head

Irregular or entirely missing periods

Intense sugar cravings

Depression

And of course, painful ovarian cysts

There is no cure for PCOS yet, but there are treatments. If you suspect PCOS, get your hormones checked. Talk to a doctor. Estrogen-progesterone birth control may help, as well as Metformin (an insulin resistance drug for diabetics)

It is not considered genetic, but I disagree.

I am not a doctor, but I have PCOS and I’ve been doing a lot of research to help clear up my issues. I hadn’t been able to lose weight even with a healthy diet and regular 20 minute bike rides. It’s frustrating and debilitating. I thought that I was just stuck, but talking to my doctor gave me hope.

I know several other girls with PCOS (every woman on my dad’s side of the family) with all different struggles.

What’s your story?

[untiliamjustb0nes]

How many cals do you typically eat on a daily basis to maintain a weight loss regime without fainting or binging? I’m struggling so hard to restrict because I always end up binging in the end. I either eat too much or too little and don’t know what to do.

To be honest it really depends on your weight. If you’re at a high weight you can restrict a lot more than if you’re at a lower weight, however at a lower weight you have like 0 chance to binge because… well your body doesn’t rlly work lols but we love that !! So, stick to your diet and go slow if needed (any deficit is GOOD!) when you feel ready, restrict a little more. Right now I’m eating 500 calories and I’m working on my demons trying not to binge, once I’m fully comfy with 500 I’ll go down to 300 max, but then once I reach my gw I will unfortunately have to eat like 1000 again and still I will lose weight. Don’t want to lose too much because don’t want to get tubed again

[neurodiverse-adulthood]

Nourishing with a Low Appetite: Secondary Edition

Inspired by low appetite & a lifelong complicated relationship with nourishment.

Sufficiently nourishing is critical to wellness and functioning. It can be hindered by disordered thoughts & habits, brain-body disconnect, and low appetite. This list is meant to help with nourishment and weight care!

~Most~ of these ideas are subtle cues coaxing you to eat more, cited with empirical backing. [ Warning: studies approach subjects with weight loss, restrictive eating, diet culture, & anti-fat perspectives. ] > I am not a professional-- just a struggling ND adult trying to put their Bachelor degree in psychology to good use!

x x x x x x x x x

♠ ♠ ♠

↖️ Top left: Food-scented lip balm

What-- Use lip balm with a tasty scent Why-- Olfactory food cues -> eating more Bonus-- Hydrate lips, prevent skin-picking

⬆️ Top middle: Noise-cancelling headphones

What-- Play music through headphones while eating Why-- Music -> eating more Bonus-- Eliminates auditory sensitivities

↗️ Top right: Social eating

What-- Eat with a party of trusted people Why-- Eating with a group -> eating more

⬅️ Middle left: Chewelry

What-- Chew a piece of chewelry Why-- Orosensory stimulation -> eating more Bonus if food-shaped-- Food imagery -> eating more

🫵 Middle middle: Honey sticks

What-- Flavored honey in a thin, plastic tube Why-- Easy, portable shot of sustenance

➡️ Middle right: Fun utensils

What-- Eat with cute, decorated utensils of your liking Why-- Eating enjoyment -> eating more

↙️ Bottom left: Cooking shows

What-- Watch cooking and food shows Why-- Watching TV -> eating more + food imagery -> eating more Bonus-- Learn culinary skills

⬇️ Bottom middle: Larger plate

What-- Eat from larger plates Why-- Using larger kitchenware -> eating more

↘️ Bottom right: Food stickers

What-- Surround yourself with food imagery Why-- Food imagery -> eating more

See also-- upcoming tummy and digestive care posts, low appetite primary edition

[diaryofamadfatwoman]

Paint Your Gut Healthy

Welcome everyone to Week 5 of my journey to better health. After my mishaps last week, I managed to lean more more right than wrong this week. Therefore, I was able to lose 1.6 pounds. However, my blood pressure was elevated and I contribute that to the salt I have been adding to my lemons. Lesson learned: cut the salt.

Towards my goal, I really want to report losses each week. Reporting a weight gain can be pretty disheartening but I am pleased to say that this five-week period is the longest I have remained on a health management system ever. While my efforts have not been perfect, my intention has not wavered and that is saying a lot for a known quitter as myself; and as I have mentioned previously, I am renewing my mind, so 'quitter' is now a defunct adjective on this journey.

This week I have been thinking a lot about the color of food. That sounds like a book title. I will write it, but later. For now, let's think about how we can Paint Our Gut Healthy and why.

I spoke briefly last week about life being in the blood. If you have ever had blood drawn, you will have noticed your blood is very dark purple in the tube and turns red when air hits it. That reminds me of what a Bible instructor said just last night, that purple is the color of royalty. Being a Child of God is being of a Royal Priesthood and that is good news to me!

How appropriate is it then that Red would be the color of life or anti-aging in today's vernacular. What I have learned in my brief research is that Red foods promote heart health and contain antioxidants among other things, that reverse oxidative stress on our bodies. On the short list of Red foods is apples, cranberries, red bell pepper, and tomatoes.

The color Orange in our diet promotes a healthy immune system, fighting against viruses and bad bacteria. Vitamins that build up immunity are Vitamins C, E, D, B, zinc, and selenium. Of course we can take manufactured vitamins, and I do; but food is an added and ideal choice. Those foods include carrots, oranges, orange bell pepper, sweet potatoes, red lentils, cauliflower, garlic and onion. All are great foods we probably enjoy already.  But once we set our focus on better health, it will be much easier to add these to our diet more frequently.

Unless this blog gets too lengthy, I will pause it here until next week. Join me again as we continue to see how I am using food and movement for better health on what I have coined my Health Management System. It is a work in progress.

Like, share and follow and let me hear your comments and suggestions.  Remember, you are my helpers too!

Here is the picture sent by 'tealately60' of the Mushroom and Cauliflower recipe she tried. Doesn't it look delicious with all those vegetables?

[cripple-cryptid]

Okay okay I think this is gonna be a 2 part thing I'm not sure yet tbh. Also fair warning this may end up being absolute nonsense the brain fog is super bad.

So like last month I saw the GI specialist for my drastic weight loss and inability to eat. He told me that it's likely 2 things. I likely have IBS, which makes sense, and gastroparesis. That also makes sense.

So he ordered a blood test to see if I'm celiac (I'm not) and sent me home with a box of stuff. I had to shit in a tube and send it to their lab.

I was not entirely capable of doing that second thing for like a month. Various reasons. I won't get into that for the sake of not being boring.

On top of that, he told me to start the low FODMAP diet.

This was also around the time that we had discovered that I have several food allergies. As in, like...did anyone else know that unless listed, vitamin c and citric acid come from corn? CORN??? AND THAT IF YOU ARE ALLERGIC TO CORN YOU CAN'T HAVE RED BELL PEPPER????

Yes, I'm allergic to fucking corn. And wheat. So I have to mainly specify "grain free" instead of just "wheat free" and that's not even the worst part.

I mean, it's really infuriating to learn that basically everything has corn in it. Even if it just says "natural flavors" it basically could be corn, or wheat, or milk, eggs, peanuts, soy, sesame, or literally anything else. Meaning literally all my allergies. Yep. I'm allergic to all the most basic foods, as well as goddamn soy. Did you also know that fresh produce is rubbed in a wax that has corn in it? Yep. Oh, and basically all non dairy milk has corn or soy. Or both.

Anyways I wasn't really able to change my diet until the beginning of this month due to finances, and because I live in the middle of buttfuck nowhere, there aren't many options for me to buy that don't have some sort of allergen, or it's high FODMAP. Or high histamine because I'm trying that out too due to a possible MCAS dx.

Anyways I saw the GI again 2 days ago. I have to get an endoscopy and colonoscopy on Thursday morning. But instead of drinking miralax and shitting my brains out, I have to take 12 pills that'll do the same thing and try to chug water at the same time. And then I do that again at 6:30 in the morning the day of. Yeah. 24 "shit yourself" pills. Hate that.

But like...maybe we will find out why I can't eat. And why I lost so much weight so goddamn fast. Because I know it isn't just the food allergies, though I'd wager it didn't help.

On the bright side, after spending the whole day yesterday looking for a better online grocery option, I discovered Thrive Market, and they have a ton of safe options for me. Sure, I can't really avoid corn derived citric acid or vitamin c, but I can get milk that doesn't have corn, and I can buy bread that doesn't have many allergens either (just egg for some goddamn reason)

[healthbiz]

What Is Ballerina Tea?

Ballerina tea, also called 3 ballerina tea, has shown up in the news lately because it is said that it can help people lose weight and have other great health benefits from drinking it. It is called Ballerina tea due to the fact people think if you consume it then you too can be skinny and graceful like ballerina dancers. Ballerina tea is made up of 2 herbs: senna and Chinese mallow, but sometimes lemon or cinnamon gets added. Both those main ingredients are laxatives, so the reason it may help people lose weight is that it rids the body of excess water weight, but you are quite likely to gain this back. This tea doesn’t affect the metabolism of fat like some other teas such as green tea. However, Ballerina tea does have a lot of antioxidants and flavonoids that help keep the cells safe from damage from free radicals that cause cancer. Studies have shown these flavonoids also reduce your chances of dying from heart disease. One thing it does since it is made up of two laxatives is relieving constipation. Studies showed that 40 people suffering from constipation consumed senna for four weeks and had nearly a 40 percent less chance of bowel problems. Ballerina tea is free from caffeine but some drinkers still claim it gives them energy, but there are no studies to confirm this notion.  However, it is possible it can lower blood sugar levels due to the Chinese mallow. Studies with animals and test tubes showed that Chinese mallow promotes the secretion of insulin and that may lessen the chances of developing diabetes. Ballerina Tea Side Effects Ballerina tea is seen to cause side effects in some people. Some of these side effects include dehydration, cramps, and diarrhea which could be mild or it could get to severe stage. If you use Ballerina tea for a long time, it also causes water loss since it is a laxative. Those suffering from liver or kidney problems shouldn’t drink ballerina tea due to the senna in it sometimes causing problems in that area. As in all cases of beginning some sort of new daily change to your diet, you should always talk to your doctor to find out if it could interfere with any medications you are taking or conditions you suffer from. The bottom line is that ballerina tea is basically a laxative that helps with constipation due to it helping the body get rid of water weight. However, it is not recommended for some folks suffering from liver or kidney problems and if you drink too much it can make you dehydrated too. Read the full article

[jerrytrancomedy]

I still like this photo. More now. Less back then, when I would cringe from imagining my protruding belly popping those shirt buttons. I'm grateful for this picture, though. It inspired me to change and be as strong as those buttons.

Dieting and weight loss are both complex and sensitive topics, so the point of this blog post/essay isn’t to give unsolicited advice or tell anyone what to do. All bodies and situations are different, and what worked for me may not work for someone else. What follows are only my thoughts regarding the inner transformation I experienced alongside the outer one. I write this hoping it provides some value to others. And to brag.  

I used to think I looked like a grownup test tube baby of a Care Bear and the Pillsbury Doughboy's donated sperm. Probably not a surprise then that I was unhappy with my body and appearance, and I dealt with that unhappiness by avoiding and repressing it. Constantly sweeping dust under the carpet created a mean, filthy monster that eventually escaped and wreaked havoc inside me. I swore to fight back against this sad inner demon by improving my physical and mental health. I had wanted to work on both for quite some time but never did because I knew doing so would be hard, and I was soft. God forgot to turn on the timer, so he pulled me out of the oven way too early-soft. In grade school, when it was time to tumble in gym class, I would leave, hang out inside a restroom stall, and tip-toe back right before it ended-soft. Believing this for most of my life had me feeling hollow, like an empty roll of toilet paper.   

A big reason it took me so long to get started on this particular journey (I'm 40) was having emotional baggage as far as the third eye could see. I lacked ambition because wanting meant doing, and in my mind attempting anything of consequence equaled failing. Mockery, humiliation, and shitty feelings that I did not want to feel would then follow. I could coast, though, and coast I did until I got tired of seeing life pass me by. Perfectionism also contributed to my inaction and inspired the only exercise I used to do: beating myself up. If I couldn't do something perfectly immediately, why even bother? There was no big epiphany-producing event like winning "Most Likely to Have the Next Midlife Crisis" at my twenty-year high school reunion either. That would have made for a better story. The simple, boring truth is I started to change once I stopped procrastinating. After seeing that swingset photo, I ordered a kettlebell and then celebrated by placing an order for Thai food on Uber Eats.         

Once I finally started going to the gym regularly and watching what I ate, my overall sense of well-being began improving. I was also conflicted about the ugly truth of why I was doing this in the first place, which was for shallow, superficial, or aesthetic reasons if we want to be pretentious. I wanted to be hot but did not want to become one of those people I used to roll my eyes at from a distance. The meatheads, the aggro guys with too much testosterone, the wannabe fitness influencers. People I used to judge and was secretly a tad bit jealous of. Not wanting to waste any momentum, I kept moving, shrugged my shoulders, and said, "whatever it takes." Thankfully, over time, a greater purpose started to grow like a caterpillar doing pushups inside its cocoon. 

Fortunately, severe hunger pangs from my diet’s calorie restriction weren't an issue. Unfortunately, occasional waves of fatigue and lethargy that swallowed me whole and left me in a zombie-like limbo between awake and asleep were. Those states usually led to taking a 1-2 week-long diet break, which I did every 6-8 weeks. The diet breaks helped with not having hunger pangs, as did doing PG-13 stuff to freshly-used peanut butter spoons. One embarrassing setback that happened was misreading the labels on the large chicken breasts I used to eat before becoming an ovo-vegetarian and counting all of them as 4 ounces. That threw a wrench in my calorie counting but buying a kitchen scale to weigh food resolved that issue. These stumbling blocks reminded me to slow down and be patient, a quality I often forgot or overlooked in the past. If I had rushed things, I probably would have made more mistakes, felt like a failure, and ended up quitting. Every painful reminder would have then been deleted, including the thirst trap photos, which, sad to say, would have been a personal tragedy.    

A new identity started forming around sticking to a weight training program, adhering to my diet, and not burning my face while cooking. Those statements also turned into mantras after adding "I'm someone who..." in front of them. Whenever the road got bumpy, I would say them aloud with intense passion, which probably explains the looks I get from my next-door neighbor. And it worked! After dieting for more than a year and a half, I recently ended it. I’m happy with my effort and progress, even though I didn’t accomplish my initial goal of having Calvin Klein underwear model-like six-pack abs. After clinging to that target for so long, which I now realize was unrealistic since I’m still relatively new to lifting weights, my ego was bruised. I did not have enough muscle mass to be that ripped. That was when I begrudgingly accepted that not everyone has the genetics to sell overpriced tighty whities. Some are 5’6”, broad-shouldered, and built more like the starting fullback of whatever college football team the hobbits from Lord of the Rings went to, and that’s okay. 

There were several practices I did that fostered this transformation. When perfectionism reared its ugly head, I practiced self-compassion by reminding myself that I’m a flawed human being just like everyone else. Self-compassion also made me realize that I'm worthy of self-love and respect just by existing. Viewing weight training and cooking as self-care and acts my future self would appreciate made it easier to do them consistently. The Most Valuable Practice award would have to go to meditation & mindfulness, though. I know it is not for everyone, but nothing has improved my life more than that habit. Greater awareness of my emotions and thoughts and not becoming attached to them allowed me to respond to life with a clear and calm mind. Specifically, regarding weight loss, the combination of meditation and weight training made me more present, grounded, and aware of my body. Gripping a barbell brings our focus to the here and now, similar to our breath during meditation. Doctor visits for injuries would've occurred, too, if I did bench presses, squats, and deadlifts with my head stuck in the past or stressed about the future. As someone who used to struggle with binge eating, mindfulness decreased the times I overindulged and ate past the point of fullness. Along the way, the negative narratives that used to play constantly in my mind stopped, revealing the real purpose of this journey. I wasn’t weak, lazy, undisciplined, and incapable of being the person I wanted to be. I was wrong and had never felt better. Also, if I sound too much like a stringy-haired, new-age hippy right now, please know that I got a haircut the other day and sometimes use conditioner. 

I don’t think what I did here was special or unique, and I'm still very much a work in progress. The worst contestant on MasterChef Junior would angrily shake their tiny spatula at me after tasting my cooking. For months now, my entire apartment has been covered in protein powder. I'm still too hard on myself at times. I suspect I will continue to grow, make mistakes, and hopefully learn from them for the rest of my life. I also believe that everyone is capable of accomplishing hard yet meaningful goals. If anyone ended up reading this entire self-indulgent essay, then thank you. The least I could do is root for you as you keep traveling down your journey. Alright, time to go start bulking up so I can play Awkwafina's jealous and insecure ex in Shang-Chi 2.  

photo by @photojuice

p.s. These are some of the resources I used that helped me the most with losing weight and getting in better shape. For nutrition and weight training, the websites Stronger By Science and Ripped Body both have a lot of great free content. For nutrition tracking and calorie counting, I use MacroFactor. In the beginning, I used Myfitnesspal, and I regret not using MacroFactor sooner because of how much better its layout and features are. It's not free, but if you can afford it, I definitely recommend it. “Atomic Habits” by James Clear is a must-read for anyone interested in forming new habits and sticking to them. Other recent books that influenced this post were “The Road Less Traveled” by M Scott Peck & “Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself” by Kristin Neff. 

[cannabiscomrade]

This will probably be more of a gasteoparesis-related question than a feeding tube one, my bad, but how did you know it was time for a tube? What was it like in the lead-up to that point, assuming it wasn't sudden? How did it get on your radar, or your doctors' radars?

That’s okay! It’s still relevant for Feeding Tube Awareness Week and honestly I’ll always take the opportunity to talk about gastroparesis or feeding tubes

It wasn’t sudden, but it also was like a stone rolling downhill, where it picks up speed to the point where you can’t get ahead of it.

I always had gastric issues with vomiting being predominant, but was misdiagnosed for a long time before being correctly diagnosed with gastroparesis.

I had a flare start up in Aug 2022 that lasted til early Nov 2022 when I was finally diagnosed with gastroparesis during a hospitalization.

I immediately started the gastroparesis diet and Reglan in multiple forms, which failed. Then I tried erythromycin, which also failed, and then I got covid and I stopped being able to tolerate liquid food at the beginning of December 2022. I could not hold down any food, even something as simple as ensure clear and had no nutrition from the beginning of December until I started feeding through my tube in the beginning of January 2023. In total I was in a calorie deficit for about 5 months.

I worked with a dietitian who was familiar with gastroparesis, a gastroenterologist PA and overseeing MD that all agreed to move to a feeding tube, but the bureaucracy of insurance and waiting for my order to move through the system as an outpatient procedure around Xmas caused me to get critically ill and I was hospitalized with starvation ketoacidosis, and my tube was placed two days later. (Long time mutual remember) it was so bad I went into starvation ketoacidosis.

In between all of this were many ER visits and hospitalizations, all of this long winded story is to say that it should NOT get this far. You should have nutritional interventions way before this point.

Unfortunately I hear a lot of stories like this in the gastroparesis community, or others where they are barred from getting a tube because they’re not “bad enough” or they aren’t under a certain BMI/weight so I like to share my story and give out this resource:

American College of Gastroenterology 2022 Clinical Guideline for Gastroparesis

And specifically this treatment algorithm to present to your doctor

To discuss treatment options if you think you’re at a point where you need nutrition support.

Other sources say a weight loss of over 5-10% of your weight involuntarily in the last 6 months and an inability to orally maintain nutrition in combination with the above.

TL;DR I tried multiple forms of treatment with a combination of medications and followed the pictured algorithm above all the way to the bottom but then I got really really sick and almost died

Advocate for yourself Happy Feeding Tube Awareness Week!

[cranialgames]

Previously my answer easily would have been endometriosis pain (easily worse than my c section and sciatica and everything pregnancy related)

BUT I’m now the proud owner of a fuckton of gallstones and lemme tell you, uncomplicated gallbladder disease (where the stones migrate and block tubes and cause pain but there’s no additional infection) is legit the worst fucking pain I have ever been in, because I’m one of the very unlucky few that not only has symptomatic gallbladder disease but that also gets to feel it as chest pain rather than stomach pain and I’m talking like can’t breathe can’t speak levels of pain where nothing but getting drugged out of your absolute gourd helps

No physical position makes the pain better, staying still and/or moving around don’t make the pain better

Going to the toilet doesn’t help, passing wind doesn’t help, warm baths don’t help, trying to make myself throw up doesn’t help (unless by some miracle the spasms shift the stone and it all unblocks)

All you can do is sit and cry and shake and sweat through your clothes for hours until it hopefully passes by itself or you just pass out

That’s just if the stones block the bile duct btw, but don’t worry, you’re also at risk of them migrating further and blocking other ducts and causing shit like pancreatitis and liver problems!

Anything that causes the gallbladder to empty can trigger it, meaning anything you consume can trigger it. Oh also if you don’t consume anything it can trigger it too!!

The only cure offered to me is surgery, for which there is an undefined waiting time (I’m 2 months in, babey) and I’m trying to get a private referral for but the non medical staff at my GP surgery are useless on principle

Sorry for the rant but I’m just so physically exhausted, I’ve been on an ultra low fat diet to try and reduce the number of stones that are forming but apparently rapid weight loss can also make the stones form lmao

The surgery is keyhole unless shit goes south so that’s something at least

We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.

[dpuhospitalblogs]

Top Digestive Disorders a Stomach Specialist Can Treat

If you're frequently troubled by stomach issues, you're not alone. Many people experience various digestive problems that can disrupt daily life. Visiting a stomach specialist doctor in Pune might be your best step towards finding relief. These specialists, also known as gastroenterologists, are experts in diagnosing and treating conditions that affect the gastrointestinal (GI) tract. Here’s a look at some of the top digestive disorders they can help manage:

Gastroesophageal Reflux Disease (GERD)

GERD occurs when stomach acid frequently flows back into the tube connecting your mouth and stomach (oesophagus). This backwash (acid reflux) can irritate the lining of your oesophagus. Common symptoms include heartburn, food or sour liquid regurgitation, and difficulty swallowing. A stomach specialist can offer treatments that range from lifestyle changes and medications to advanced surgical options if necessary.

Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS)

IBS is a common disorder that affects the large intestine. Symptoms like cramping, abdominal pain, bloating, gas, diarrhoea, constipation, or both characterise it. While it's a chronic condition, many people manage symptoms with diet, lifestyle changes, and stress management. A gastroenterologist can help tailor a treatment plan that minimises discomfort and effectively manages the symptoms.

Peptic Ulcers

Peptic ulcers are open sores that develop on the inside lining of the stomach and the upper portion of the small intestine. The most common symptom is stomach pain. Peptic ulcers occur when the stomach's protective mucus decreases, allowing digestive acids to eat away at the tissues. Treatment from a stomach specialist may include medication to reduce acid levels, antibiotics, and lifestyle advice.

Crohn’s Disease

Part of a group of diseases known as inflammatory bowel disease (IBD), Crohn's disease causes inflammation of the digestive tract, which can lead to abdominal pain, severe diarrhoea, fatigue, weight loss, and malnutrition. Inflammation caused by Crohn's disease can involve different areas of the digestive tract in different people. Treatments include anti-inflammatory drugs, immune system suppressors, and sometimes surgery.

Celiac Disease

Celiac disease is an immune reaction to eating gluten, wheat, barley, and rye protein. Over time, the immune reaction creates inflammation that damages the small intestine's lining and prevents the absorption of some nutrients (malabsorption). The classic symptom is diarrhoea. Other symptoms include bloating, gas, fatigue, low blood count (anaemia), and osteoporosis. A stomach specialist can help manage celiac disease through dietary changes and recommend supplements to correct nutrient deficiencies.

Pancreatitis

This condition occurs when the pancreas becomes inflamed. The pancreas is a vital organ in the upper part of the abdomen that produces enzymes that help digestion and hormones that help regulate the way your body processes sugar. Symptoms include upper abdominal pain, nausea, and vomiting. Treatment often requires hospitalisation, where specialists focus on relieving symptoms and treating the underlying cause.

Conclusion

When experiencing any symptoms of digestive discomfort, it's important not to ignore them. A stomach specialist doctor in Pune can offer specialised care tailored to your needs, ensuring your digestive health is on the right track. Don't let stomach issues hold you back; seek the advice and treatment you deserve to lead a healthier, more comfortable life.

[targetcancer]

Colon Therapy in Chennai

Colon cancer, also known as colorectal cancer, is one of the most prevalent types of cancer globally. It typically develops in the colon or rectum, parts of the large intestine, and often begins as small, benign growths called polyps. Over time, some of these polyps can transform into cancer. Early detection and proper treatment are crucial in improving survival rates, making it imperative to understand the risk factors, symptoms, and treatment options.  Colon Therapy in Chennai  this guide will provide a detailed overview of colon cancer, focusing on key aspects such as diagnosis, staging, and treatment methods, with a spotlight on colon therapy options in Chennai.

What is Colon Cancer?

Colon cancer originates in the large intestine, where it can affect either the colon or rectum. Most cases begin with the formation of polyps, which are typically harmless in their initial stages. However, some polyps can develop into malignant tumors if not identified and removed early.

Understanding the symptoms is vital for early intervention. Many symptoms of colon cancer can mimic other gastrointestinal issues, making it easy to overlook. Recognizing these signs early can be life-saving.

Signs and Symptoms of Colon Cancer

Early signs of colon cancer are often subtle, which underscores the importance of regular screenings and vigilance. Common symptoms include:

Blood in the stool

Persistent changes in bowel habits (e.g., diarrhea, constipation, or stool consistency lasting more than a few days)

Unexplained weight loss

Abdominal discomfort such as cramps, gas, or pain

A feeling of incomplete bowel evacuation

These symptoms may not always indicate colon cancer but warrant immediate medical consultation. Early diagnosis can drastically improve treatment outcomes.

Diagnosis and Testing Methods

Early detection is crucial in effectively managing colon cancer. Several diagnostic tools are available to detect the disease, each with unique advantages.

1. Colonoscopy

A colonoscopy is the gold standard for diagnosing colon cancer. It involves the insertion of a flexible tube with a camera into the rectum to examine the entire colon. This procedure allows for both the detection and removal of polyps.

2. CT Colonography

Also known as virtual colonoscopy, this non-invasive imaging technique uses CT scans to provide a detailed view of the colon and rectum.

3. Stool Tests

These include fecal occult blood tests (FOBT) and stool DNA tests, which can detect hidden blood or abnormal DNA markers in the stool.

4. Biopsy

If abnormalities are detected during a colonoscopy, a biopsy is performed to remove a small tissue sample for further analysis, confirming the presence of cancer cells.

These diagnostic methods help determine the stage and nature of the cancer, guiding the appropriate treatment plan.

Stages of Colon Cancer

Colon cancer is classified into different stages based on its progression, which helps determine treatment options and prognosis.

Stage 0: Cancer is confined to the innermost layer of the colon.

Stage I: Cancer has spread to the muscle layer but not beyond the colon wall.

Stage II: Cancer extends beyond the colon to nearby tissues but hasn’t reached the lymph nodes.

Stage III: Cancer has reached nearby lymph nodes but not distant organs.

Stage IV: Cancer has metastasized to distant organs like the liver or lungs.

The stage of cancer at diagnosis plays a critical role in determining treatment strategy and expected outcomes.

Risk Factors for Colon Cancer

While anyone can develop colon cancer, certain factors increase the likelihood of its occurrence. Awareness of these risk factors can prompt early screening and lifestyle modifications to reduce risk.

1. Health History

A personal or family history of colon cancer or polyps increases risk.

Conditions like inflammatory bowel disease (IBD) and genetic syndromes such as Lynch syndrome are also significant risk factors.

2. Lifestyle Factors

Diet: High consumption of red and processed meats is associated with a higher risk.

Smoking: Long-term smoking is a known risk factor.

Alcohol: Excessive alcohol intake can contribute to the development of colon cancer.

Physical Inactivity: A sedentary lifestyle increases susceptibility.

3. Age

The risk of colon cancer increases significantly after the age of 50, though younger adults are also at risk in certain cases.

Treatment Options for Colon Cancer

The choice of treatment depends on the stage and severity of the disease. Advances in medical science have made a wide range of effective treatments available.

1. Surgery

Surgery is often the first-line treatment for colon cancer. Depending on the stage, different surgical approaches may be employed:

Early-Stage Surgery: Minimally invasive procedures, such as polypectomy or local excision, are used to remove small tumors.

Advanced Surgery: For more advanced cases, partial or total colectomy may be required. This involves removing the affected section of the colon and possibly nearby lymph nodes.

2. Chemotherapy

Chemotherapy uses drugs to kill cancer cells and is often used after surgery to eliminate residual cancer cells or in advanced cases where surgery isn’t viable.

3. Radiation Therapy

High-energy radiation is used to destroy cancer cells. It is commonly used alongside surgery and chemotherapy in more advanced cases.

4. Targeted Therapy

Targeted therapies attack specific proteins or genetic markers associated with cancer, offering a more precise approach with fewer side effects compared to traditional chemotherapy.

Prognostic Factors and Recurrence

Several factors influence the prognosis of colon cancer, including:

Stage at Diagnosis: Early detection offers the best chance for a positive outcome.

Tumor Grade: Higher-grade tumors tend to grow and spread more aggressively.

Genetic Mutations: Certain mutations can impact treatment response and prognosis.

Recurrence is a concern for many colon cancer patients, particularly within the first few years after treatment. Regular follow-ups, including colonoscopies and imaging tests, are crucial for early detection of any recurrence.

Conclusion

Colon cancer remains a major health challenge, but early detection and advances in treatment have significantly improved survival rates. By understanding the risk factors, recognizing symptoms, and seeking timely diagnosis, individuals can take proactive steps toward prevention and effective management.

Chennai offers advanced medical care, including state-of-the-art colon therapy options. Whether through surgery, chemotherapy, or other targeted treatments, patients have access to comprehensive care tailored to their specific needs. Staying informed and vigilant is the first step in combating colon cancer and ensuring better health outcomes.  For more details visit  https://targetcancer.care/targeting-cancer/surgical-oncology/