#web application issues

[ateamsoftsolutions01]

Effective Debugging Techniques for Resolving Web Application Issues

Introduction

Web applications are complex systems that can encounter various issues, from bugs to performance problems. Effective debugging is crucial for resolving these issues quickly and efficiently. This article explores proven debugging techniques that can help developers identify and fix web application problems.

Understanding the Problem

Reproduce the Issue

The first step in debugging is to reproduce the issue consistently. Understanding the exact conditions under which the problem occurs helps narrow down the potential causes. Gather as much information as possible, including error messages, user reports, and logs.

Collect Relevant Data

Use logging and monitoring tools to collect relevant data about the issue. Tools like Loggly, Splunk, and Sentry can provide insights into what went wrong, when, and why. Detailed logs are invaluable for pinpointing the root cause of the problem.

Debugging Techniques

Code Review

Conduct a thorough code review to identify potential bugs. Reviewing code with fresh eyes or having another developer examine it can reveal issues that were previously overlooked. Pay attention to common problem areas like loops, conditionals, and data handling.

Use Debugging Tools

Leverage debugging tools and integrated development environments (IDEs) like Visual Studio Code, Chrome DevTools, or Firebug. These tools allow you to set breakpoints, step through code, and inspect variables, making it easier to understand the flow of execution and identify issues.

Isolate the Problem

Break down the code into smaller sections and isolate the problematic area. This process, known as “divide and conquer,” simplifies the debugging process by focusing on smaller, more manageable chunks of code.

Advanced Debugging

Profiling and Performance Monitoring

Use profiling tools to monitor performance and identify bottlenecks. Tools like New Relic, Dynatrace, and Google Lighthouse can help you analyze performance metrics and optimize your code for better efficiency.

Automated Testing

Implement automated testing to catch issues early in the development process. Unit tests, integration tests, and end-to-end tests can help ensure that your code behaves as expected and can significantly reduce the time spent on manual debugging.

Continuous Improvement

Learn from Mistakes

Document the debugging process and learn from each issue you resolve. Understanding the root causes of past problems can help prevent similar issues in the future. Share insights and best practices with your team to improve overall code quality.

Regular Maintenance

Perform regular maintenance and code reviews to keep your web application in good health. Proactive measures, such as updating dependencies and refactoring code, can prevent many issues from arising in the first place.

Conclusion

Effective debugging is essential for maintaining a reliable and efficient web application. By understanding the problem, using the right tools, and employing proven techniques, developers can quickly identify and resolve web application performance issues. Continuous improvement and proactive maintenance further ensure the long-term stability and performance of your web application.

[soysaucevictim]

Just encountering a video essay that is making me think to comment something like:

Yeah, there the Applicability Problem, I'm already seeing here. When you can apply parallels to many, many things with a cultural object - that deriving/enforcing allegories get messy and contradictory. Like, I bet various creators of zombie media had /some/ specific applicable themes in mind, but not like all the possible ones that exist at the same time. It would make the narrative too friable and incoherent to hold onto. And analysis is more accessible when the lens chosen is focused about it, too. There's a LOT of important intersecting issues under capitalism, but it's easier to pick a few of them at a time than trying to tackle it all in a single essay. (Why it's better to say X-Men is applicable to the experiences of, say, queer people. But not a 1:1 allegory with the queer experience. Since it's also applicable to things like race/racism, and lots of other things.)

Because, maaaan. This one is really going the breadth, not depth route of articulating it's points. orz

[8techlabs-blog]

How to Balance Fixing Performance Issues and Adding New Features in Web Applications?

In today’s digital landscape, web applications are essential for business operations, marketing, and consumer involvement. As organizations expand and consumer expectations rise, development teams are frequently confronted with the difficult task of balancing two key priorities: addressing performance issues and introducing new features.

While boosting performance improves the user experience and increases efficiency, new features are required to remain competitive and meet market demands. Prioritizing one over the other, on the other hand, might have negative consequences—performance concerns can lead to a poor user experience while failing to innovate can result in a competitive disadvantage.

This blog delves into how to balance improving performance and introducing new features to web apps, allowing firms to satisfy technical and market demands efficiently.

Why Balancing Performance and New Features Is Crucial

A web application‘s success depends on both its performance and its features. However, relying entirely on one might result in imbalances that impair both user happiness and business progress. 

Performance:Performance is an important component that directly influences user retention and happiness. Users can become frustrated and leave if the application has slow loading times, crashes, or problems. Ensuring that your web application runs smoothly is essential since 53% of mobile consumers would quit a site that takes more than three seconds to load. 

New Features:On the other hand, constantly adding new features keeps users interested and promotes your company as innovative. New features generate growth by attracting new consumers and retaining existing ones who want to experience the most recent changes.

The dilemma is deciding when to prioritize bug fixes over new feature development. A poor balance can harm both performance and innovation, resulting in a subpar user experience and stagnation. 

Common Performance Issues in Web Applications

Before balancing performance and features, it’s important to understand the common performance issues that web applications face:

Slow Load Times: Slow pages lead to higher bounce rates and lost revenue.

Server Downtime: Frequent server outages impact accessibility and trust.

Poor Mobile Optimization: A significant portion of web traffic comes from mobile devices and apps that aren’t optimized for mobile fail to reach their potential.

Security Vulnerabilities: Data breaches and security flaws harm credibility and user trust.

Bugs and Glitches: Software bugs lead to poor user experiences, especially if they cause the app to crash or become unresponsive.

Strategic Approaches to Fixing Performance Issues

When performance issues develop, they must be handled immediately to guarantee that the online application functions properly. Here are techniques for improving performance without delaying new feature development: 

Prioritize Critical Issues:Tackle performance issues that have the most significant impact first, such as slow loading times or security vulnerabilities. Use analytics to identify bottlenecks and determine which areas require urgent attention. 

Use a Continuous Improvement Process:Continuously monitor and optimize the application’s performance. With tools like Google PageSpeed Insights, you can track performance metrics and make incremental improvements without major overhauls. 

Optimize Database Queries:Slow database queries are one of the leading causes of web app performance issues. Optimize queries and ensure that the database is indexed properly for faster access and retrieval of data. 

Reduce HTTP Requests:The more requests a page makes to the server, the slower it loads. Minimize requests by reducing file sizes, combining CSS and JavaScript files, and utilizing caching.

  5. Leverage Caching and CDNs:       Use caching strategies and Content Delivery Networks (CDNs) to deliver content quickly to users by storing files in multiple locations globally.

Why Adding New Features is Essential for Growth

 In the rapidly changing digital environment, businesses must continually innovate to stay relevant. Adding new features is key to maintaining a competitive edge and enhancing user engagement. Here’s why:

User Expectations:Today’s consumers expect personalized experiences and constant innovation. Failure to add new features can lead to customer churn, as users may feel your web application no longer meets their needs.

Market Differentiation:Introducing new features allows your application to stand out in the marketplace. Unique functionalities can set your app apart from competitors, attracting new users and increasing customer loyalty.

Increased Revenue Opportunities:New features can lead to additional revenue streams. For example, adding premium features or new integrations can boost the app’s value and lead to increased sales or subscription rates.

  4. Feedback-Driven Innovation:       New features are often driven by user feedback. By continuously developing and adding features, you create a feedback loop that improves the overall user experience and fosters customer                 satisfaction.

Read More: https://8techlabs.com/how-to-balance-fixing-performance-issues-and-adding-new-features-in-web-applications-to-meet-market-demands-and-enhance-user-experience/

[damlahayal]

RABİSU - PLATİN (2)

In an ever-evolving digital landscape, having a reliable online presence is integral to success. At Rabisu, we specialize in delivering tailored hosting solutions that empower businesses to thrive. Our diverse range of services—spanning VPS in the UK to comprehensive web hosting—ensures that every client can find the perfect fit for their unique needs. With a focus on speed, security, and seamless performance, Rabisu is dedicated to providing you with the infrastructure necessary to scale your operations and engage with your audience effectively.

VPS UK

When it comes to vps uk hosting, Rabisu stands out for its unmatched performance and reliability. Our virtual private servers are meticulously designed to cater to businesses that require a scalable and secure hosting environment without compromising on speed or up-time.

With Rabisu, you leverage cutting-edge technology that guarantees exceptional performance, allowing your applications to run smoothly even under high traffic conditions. Our VPS solutions come with full root access, enabling you to customize your environment to meet specific needs.

Additionally, Rabisu offers flexible pricing plans that ensure you get the most bang for your buck. Whether you are a start-up or a well-established organization, our plans can be tailored to suit your requirements. We believe in providing our customers with the best value, ensuring your investment drives the desired results for your business.

With 24/7 customer support, you can rest assured knowing our expert team is always available to assist you with any issues or questions you may have. Choosing Rabisu means choosing peace of mind when it comes to managing your digital infrastructure.

Secure your VPS UK hosting today with Rabisu, and take the first step towards a more efficient and scalable online presence. Visit Rabisu to get started now!

Hosting

When it comes to reliable and efficient hosting solutions, Rabisu offers a range of options tailored specifically for your needs. With our cutting-edge VPS UK hosting, you can expect exceptional performance and stability, ensuring that your website remains online and responsive at all times.

Our hosting provides you with dedicated resources, allowing you to customize your server environment according to your unique specifications. This means you have better control over your website's performance, allowing for faster load times and a superior experience for your users.

Rabisu is committed to delivering top-tier security features with our hosting services. We implement advanced security protocols to protect your data, ensuring peace of mind while you focus on growing your business.

Furthermore, our customer support team is always available, ready to assist you 24/7. Whether you're facing a technical challenge or have questions about configuring your server, our experts are just a call or message away, guaranteeing that you are never left in the dark.

In choosing Rabisu for your VPS UK hosting needs, you are opting for reliability, flexibility, and unparalleled support; what more could you ask for? Take your website to new heights with our outstanding hosting solutions today!

[vandme12]

Cereal Cannibal - Misaki x Seung-min Kim G.N Reader

WORDS : 7000

PROMPT : FALLING FOR YOU

CHARACTER USED : Misaki from Killer Chat!

INSPIRATION FROM : Seung-min Kim from My Sweet! Housemate!

SUMMARY : Misaki gets a new house, with a housemate, who's their landlord, who's also a cannibal

Misaki sat on the cold, metal floor of their bunker, staring at the last few bills in their hand. It wasn’t enough. Not even close. The place they had been calling home was no longer an option—issues with the owner, debts piling up, and now, they were being forced out. It sucked. Hard.

They had no choice but to leave.

“You should check out the deep web listings,” Ronin suggested, leaning back against the worn-out couch that Misaki had scavenged months ago.

Angel scoffed. “That’s a disaster waiting to happen.”

V, ever the practical one, just shrugged. “It’s not the worst idea. There are some surprisingly legit places there. Just be careful.”

Misaki groaned, running a hand through their short, messy hair. “I don’t have a choice, do I?”

Their friends didn’t say anything, and the silence was answer enough.

So Misaki did what they had to do. Digging through the deep web, they scrolled past one shady listing after another until they stumbled upon an absurdly cheap offer—1,000 yen rent. The catch? They had to live with their landlord.

“Well,” they muttered to themselves, “I’ve dealt with worse.”

With a deep breath, they sent in their application. It wasn’t long before they got a response—approved.

Misaki sat cross-legged on the cold, metal floor of their bunker, hands clasped together as they muttered an impromptu prayer. “Listen, God, I know I haven’t been the best person—kinda kill people for a living, but, uh, desperate times. If you could just let this rent application go through, I swear I’ll… I don’t know, maybe stop calling Angel cannibal?”

“Liar,” Angel deadpanned

“Okay, okay. I’ll just do less.”

Ronin rolled their eyes. “You’re praying to God for a shady deep web apartment?”

“Hey, I’m broke, desperate, and out of options. Divine intervention is my last hope.”

V, raised a brow. “Or, you know, common sense.”

Before Misaki could snap back with a sarcastic remark, their laptop chimed with a notification. Their heart pounded as they scrambled to check their email. They half-expected a rejection, a scam link, or some weird cryptic message about selling their soul. But instead, there it was:

“Come on, come on,” they muttered under their breath, bouncing their leg impatiently.

Ding!

Their email refreshed, and there it was—a response.

“APPROVED.”

Misaki blinked. That was… fast. Almost too fast. Shouldn’t there have been, like, an entire government-level interrogation? A credit check? A deep dive into their very questionable employment history? Instead, it was just a short email.

They clicked it open, and their eyes skimmed over the entire terms and conditions.

All ten lines.

If you like the house, come to the address and check it out.

I’ll give you a copy of the key.

Consider yourself my roommate/housemate if you stay.

Pay rent on time, or at least try.

Don’t break my stuff.

If you see anything weird, ignore it.

Seriously, don’t ask questions.

The basement is off-limits.

No loud noises after midnight.

Welcome home! 😊

Misaki reread the email three times before looking up at their friends. “This is either the best or the worst decision of my life.”

Ronin “That’s it? I’ve seen more rules on the back of a cereal box.”

Message: Hey, if you like the house, come to the address and check it out. I’ll give you a copy of the key, and boom, you’re my roommate/housemate. See ya soon. – Landlord

“…That’s it?” Misaki blinked.

Angel talked. “Where’s the absurdly long lease agreement? The blood pact? The firstborn child sacrifice clause?”

V looked unimpressed. “I was at least expecting a ‘terms and conditions may apply.’”

Ronin whistled. “Honestly, that’s the most efficient rental process I’ve ever seen.”

Misaki reread the email, waiting for some hidden attachment or fine print, but nope. That was the whole thing. “They didn’t even do a background check.”

Angel smirked. “That’s probably a good thing for you.”

“Fair.”

Misaki took a deep breath, looking at their friends. “Alright, I guess I’m moving in. If I disappear, avenge me.”

“Absolutely not,” V said immediately. “You did this to yourself.”

Ronin told “Just make sure to check the bathroom for hidden cameras before you settle in.”

Angel smirked. “And if your new landlord asks if you’re allergic to anything, lie.”

“Gee, thanks for the support.”

They zipped up their bag, they felt the tiniest bit of apprehension creep in. Something about this felt too easy. Too convenient.

But then again, their life had never been easy or convenient, so maybe they were just due for a win.

Or, you know, an absolute disaster.

Either way, it was too late to back out now.

Misaki just grinned. “You say that like I don’t already regret every decision I’ve ever made.”

Angel smacked the back of their head. “That is NOT how that works.”

“Whatever, I’m taking the deal.” Misaki pumped their fists in the air. “I HAVE A HOME! SUCK IT, CAPITALISM!”

Ronin, Angel, and V just stared at them.

V sighed. “You’re gonna die.”

“Probably,” Misaki admitted. “But at least I’ll die with cheap rent.”

With an exaggerated sigh, Misaki closed their laptop and started packing their things—which wasn’t much. A duffel bag of clothes, some weapons, a few stolen snacks (for the road), and a single, slightly worn-out plushie that they definitely didn’t sleep with every night.

Misaki strutted through the dimly lit streets of Japan like an absolute chad. Sure, the economy was in the gutter, they were drowning in debt, and they were about to move into a suspiciously cheap apartment that might very well be a front for organ trafficking, but hey—positivity!

"It's fine. Everything's fine," they muttered to themselves, adjusting their duffel bag. "You just gotta impress the housemate, win their heart, and boom—temporary stability. Easy."

They clenched their fist in determination. This was just another mission. Instead of taking someone out, they were trying to not get kicked out. Same skill set, really.

After a long walk filled with self-pep talks and avoiding eye contact with salarymen crying into their vending machine coffee, Misaki finally arrived at the address.

The house looked… normal. Suspiciously normal. The kind of normal that felt wrong in their chaotic existence.

Taking a deep breath, Misaki knocked on the door. No answer. They rang the doorbell. Still nothing.

Then they noticed the door was slightly open.

"Oh, yeah, no red flags here at all," they muttered sarcastically before pushing it open.

"Uh, hello?" Misaki called out, stepping inside.

And that’s when they saw you.

Standing there in the dim light, you looked like a husk of a human being. Your overgrown bangs drooped over your face in a messy, unintentional crossover pattern, like they were actively trying to hide the shame of existence. There was a slight, tragic wave to them—like your hair had once had hope but had long since given up.

Your grey-teal, slightly droopy straight eyes had the kind of dark circles that could only be achieved through years of sleep deprivation, existential dread, and an overwhelming hatred for your job. You were in office wear—a dull, slightly wrinkled suit, tie barely hanging on like your will to live.

Misaki immediately clocked you as a salesperson.

And, oh boy, you looked hideous.

Not in a way that was physically repulsive, but in a way that screamed "I have seen things. I have suffered. And I will suffer again tomorrow from 9 to 5."

Your posture was the physical embodiment of why am I here?, and the way your dead-fish eyes met Misaki’s? Pure, undiluted regret.

There was a long, painful silence.

Misaki blinked.

You blinked.

Misaki cleared their throat. "Sooo… you're the landlord?"

You exhaled through your nose. "I wish I wasn’t."

"Uh-huh." Misaki glanced around. "Cool, cool. Great energy in here."

You gestured vaguely behind you. "Rooms that way. Rent’s due whenever. Don’t break anything. Don’t wake me up. If you summon a demon, tell it to kill me first."

Misaki nodded slowly. "...Love the enthusiasm."

Misaki had a problem.

Not just the broke assassin in crippling debt problem. Not just the this house is suspiciously cheap and my landlord looks like a walking depression commercial problem. No.

They had a problem in a new environment problem.

Which meant they were everywhere in the house within the first five minutes.

First, they tried to unpack, but then they got distracted by a weird stain on the wall that looked like blood (was it blood?), then they decided to check the kitchen because snacks, but then they opened a drawer and immediately forgot why they were even there. Then they somehow ended up in the hallway, staring at a random light switch, flicking it on and off just to see what it did.

Then—CRASH.

A shelf. A whole goddamn shelf. How? How?! It wasn’t even their shelf!

They just stood there, frozen, processing the fact that in five minutes, they had somehow committed their first property damage offense in the new house.

That’s when you walked in.

Dead-eyed. Drained. Like a husk of a man who had just worked a 16-hour shift selling printer ink to people who wanted to die just as much as you did. Your tie was loose like you had considered strangling yourself with it earlier but then sighed and went, not today, maybe tomorrow. Your bangs were a mess—probably hadn’t seen scissors in over a year. Your dark circles were so deep they looked like they were sponsored by a horror movie franchise.

You saw the shelf. You saw Misaki. You sighed. Deeply.

Then, in the most exhausted voice known to humankind, you muttered, "It's fine."

Misaki squinted. "…Wait, seriously?"

You blinked slowly, rubbing your eyes as if you had aged 40 years in the past 40 seconds. "Yeah. Whatever. I'll fix it later. It's fine."

That was when Misaki realized something horrifying.

You were so goddamn tired that you had transcended anger. You had seen so much bullshit in your life that a random destroying your furniture on day one didn’t even faze you.

They felt guilty. Misaki never felt guilty. They were a menace by nature. But you… You looked so damn miserable that it physically hurt them.

They tried to lighten the mood. “Uh, sorry about the—uh, shelf thing. But! Hey! At least I didn't burn the house down?”

You stared at them. Just stared.

They shifted awkwardly. “I mean, technically, I could have! That’s improvement, right?”

Silence.

Then you muttered, "Hello, Misaki."

Misaki blinked. “Oh, uh, actually, my name’s not Misaki, it’s—”

They paused, realizing their mistake.

Then, dramatically, throwing their arms out, they corrected themselves.

"MISAKI!"

There was a long pause. You just stared. The kind of stare that screamed ‘I am too tired for this but I will endure.’

Misaki waited for you to react. Maybe a sigh? A head shake? A single sign of life?

But you just closed your eyes for a moment, like you were mentally preparing yourself to deal with them for the foreseeable future.

And when you reopened them, you still looked exhausted. Still looked like you hated your job, your life, everything.

And Misaki—chaotic, impulsive, disaster of a person—felt something they rarely ever felt.

Pity.

You rubbed your temples, trying to fight off the migraine that had been steadily building for the last—what, three years? Maybe longer? Time was a blur when you lived in a constant state of exhaustion.

Misaki had already caused minor property damage. You should care. You should be concerned. But instead, you were just so damn tired.

With a sigh, you trudged over to the small, cluttered table in the living room, grabbed a stack of papers, and slapped them down in front of them. "Contract’s here. If you like the place, sign it. If not, you can leave and go back to… whatever questionable living situation you came from."

Misaki blinked. “That’s it? No interrogation? No ‘I need your government ID’ or ‘sign away your soul’ clause?”

You sighed again. Deeply. “Rent is 1,000 yen. I don’t care when you pay it. Just… get it to me eventually.”

They stared at you. Hard.

You could tell they were waiting for you to drop some sort of catch, some hidden clause that would reveal this was actually a scam or a murder plot. But there was nothing. Just you, standing there in your wrinkled office wear, looking like you’d rather be anywhere else.

They slowly pointed at you. “Why… aren’t you asking any additional details? Like my job? Or my background?”

You shrugged. “I don’t care.”

That seemed to stun them. They just stood there, processing the sheer lack of effort you were putting into this situation.

You checked the time on your watch. Your shift started in ten minutes. You were already late. Your boss was probably foaming at the mouth waiting to scream at you, but honestly? You had stopped caring about that job ages ago.

Still, you needed it to pay for this miserable excuse of an apartment.

You ran a hand down your face and muttered to yourself, "God, I need a new job."

Misaki tilted their head. “You work sales, right?”

You scoffed. Bitterly. “If you can even call it that.”

Your voice turned dull and lifeless as you mocked yourself. “Hello, sir, would you be interested in our limited-time printer ink bundle? No? That’s okay, let me waste five more minutes of your time explaining a warranty that you’ll never use. Oh, you’re walking away? I see. I am but a worm beneath your shoe. I exist to suffer. Thank you for your time.”

Misaki blinked. Twice.

You exhaled sharply and rubbed your eyes. “I swear, if I stay here one more minute, I’m going to get fired.”

They stared at you. Hard.

Then, with zero hesitation, they said, "I wanna stay."

You blinked at them. “You’re sure?”

“Yes.”

“You just got here.”

“Yep.”

“The shelf thing just happened.”

“Uh-huh.”

You exhaled through your nose. “You’re a very eager one, huh?”

Misaki shrugged. “Look, you’re tired, I’m tired, and this place is cheap. Seems like a win for both of us.”

You didn’t argue. You just reached for the contract, flipped it to the signature page, and handed them a pen. “Fine. Sign here.”

Misaki took the pen with an enthusiastic nod and scrawled their name in an exaggerated, dramatic fashion.

MISAKI 🐱

You stared at it.

They smiled.

It was a completely normal, cheerful smile.

Like nothing about this situation was weird.

Like they hadn’t just put a cat emoji in their official contract signature.

You dragged a hand down your face. "Why."

Misaki just grinned wider. "Why not?"

You sighed for what felt like the hundredth time today. “Welcome home, I guess.”

Maybe you’d regret this later.

Maybe you wouldn’t.

Either way, you had exactly five minutes to sprint to work before your boss started sending you death threats via email.

You grabbed your coat, already halfway out the door when you paused and looked back at Misaki. They were busy poking at the contract like it was a rare artifact instead of a legally binding document, probably still amused at the fact that they got away with signing it with a cat emoji.

With a sigh, you muttered, “Don’t open the door for strangers.”

Misaki scoffed. “I’m not a kid.”

You rubbed your temple. “I know. Just… saying. Sorry.”

That should have been the end of it. You should have walked out and gone to work, but something snapped inside you, and suddenly, words just started tumbling out of your exhausted soul like a faucet with a broken handle.

"Look, it's just... I've had the worst week. No, month. Maybe year. My job sucks, my boss looks like a diseased ferret in a cheap suit, I haven’t had a full night’s sleep since 2018, and now I’m standing here in my own apartment, warning a fully grown adult about basic safety like I’m some overworked single parent—"

Misaki blinked. Twice.

"—and I have to leave right now because if I don't show up at work, my paycheck will be so small I’ll have to start stealing sugar packets from cafes just to survive!"

They nodded slowly. “...That’s a lot, dude.”

“Yeah,” you exhaled, rubbing your eyes. “Anyway. I was gonna make dinner later. If you want, you can join me. Whatever I cook will probably be mediocre at best, but at least it won’t be cup noodles.”

Misaki’s eyes sparkled. SPARKLED. “I accept.”

"Cool," you mumbled, too drained to process their enthusiasm. You turned and left, already dreading the shift ahead of you.

Meanwhile...

The moment the door shut, Misaki EXPLODED.

"HAHAHAHA! I GOT A HOME!!"

They dramatically threw their arms up and immediately grabbed their PC, clutching it like it was their firstborn child. "YAY!"

Ronin, V, and Angel, who had been waiting for an update, got an earful as Misaki hopped onto a call.

“GUYS! I’M IN!”

Ronin snorted. "Took you long enough. So, what's the place like?"

"Honestly? Pretty normal. But my landlord—"

Angel cut in. "Wait. You met them?"

"Yeah?" Misaki flopped onto their new (and slightly squeaky) bed. "They look like they haven’t slept since the invention of capitalism. Like, imagine a guy who’s been dealing with too much bullshit, and you multiply that by, like, fifty. That’s them."

Ronin cackled. "Sounds like a great roommate dynamic. A sleep-deprived office worker and a contract assassin. Truly the dream team."

Misaki smirked. "I'm pretty sure I could break a plate in front of them and they’d just sigh and accept it as part of their fate."

V, who had been oddly silent until now, finally spoke.

"Misaki."

Misaki blinked. "Huh? What’s up? You almost never call me."

V didn’t respond immediately. There was a slight pause, as if they were carefully choosing their words. Then—

"If that person is dangerous, you can tell me."

Misaki’s teasing expression softened a little. V wasn’t usually the overprotective type, but when they were, it always hit different.

"Awh, V…" Misaki grinned, but this time, it was more genuine. “Don’t worry. If anything sketchy happens, you’ll be the first to know."

"...Good," V muttered

Misaki stared at the screen for a second before chuckling softly to themselves.

Yeah. Things might be weird.

But at least they weren’t alone.

Misaki sprawled across their new bed, lazily twirling a stray lock of hair as they grumbled into the call. “Man, my landlord is so boring.”

Ronin snorted. “Already talking shit? You literally just moved in.”

“No, like, seriously.” Misaki threw their legs up against the wall, staring at the ceiling. “There is nothing about them that makes them even remotely interesting. They’re not cute, not hot, not even a charming idiot. Just a sleep-deprived husk of a person. Like, imagine if a tax return became human.”

Angel wheezed. “Not a tax return.”

Misaki kept going. “Dude looks like they’ve been slowly decaying under fluorescent lighting for the past decade. You ever see someone who just radiates corporate misery? That’s them. Their entire personality is ‘I hate my job, I hate my life, I hate that I’m standing here breathing air right now.’”

V hummed. “...So, what you’re saying is, they’re not your type.”

"EXACTLY." Misaki pointed at their screen like V could actually see them. "I’m telling you, there is a 0% chance of me falling for them. Zero. Absolutely no potential for romance. If my life was a dating sim, this person wouldn't even be a side character. They’d be like... the NPC running a convenience store who has one line of dialogue.”

Ronin was dying. “Bro. You moved in like two hours ago. How are you this sure?”

Misaki scoffed. "Because! No charm. No personality. No tragic backstory with just the right amount of angst to make them attractive. Not even a hint of adorable dumbass energy. My standards are on the floor, and somehow, they still didn’t pass."

Angel whistled. "Damn. So what are they?"

"A blank slate," Misaki declared. "Like, just a person. An overworked, underpaid, ‘I’m too tired to care’ person. They didn’t even care about my background. Just said, 'Sign here' and 'Don't open the door for strangers.' Like, where’s the spice? The mystery? The suspiciously convenient tragic past?”

V sighed. “You’re disappointed your landlord isn’t a walking red flag, aren’t you?”

Misaki gasped. “How dare you.”

“So that’s a yes.”

“I don’t want them to be a red flag!” Misaki flopped onto their stomach. “I just expected something. But no. Just a corporate zombie with an office job and the social energy of a potato.”

Ronin smirked. "Sounds like you feel bad for them."

Misaki scoffed. "I don’t—"

Angel cut in. "Oh, you totally do."

V chuckled. "Misaki’s about to adopt this poor soul."

"I AM NOT—” Misaki groaned, rolling onto their back dramatically. “Okay. Fine. Maybe I feel a little bad. Like. Bro looks so exhausted. Their eyes have dark circles so bad it looks like they’re wearing eyeliner—but not in the hot way. In the ‘I have never known rest’ way.”

Ronin cackled. "So what I’m hearing is, you’re gonna start feeding them proper meals and fixing their life."

Misaki scoffed. "I am not—”

Angel interrupted. "Misaki. You literally just agreed to have dinner with them."

Misaki paused.

"......okay but that's different!"

"Is it?"

"YES. I mean, come on, they look like they live off black coffee and regret. They need help."

V sighed, amused. "So you are gonna try and fix their life."

Misaki grumbled. "Shut up."

Ronin grinned. "You're so falling for them."

"AM NOT."

"You so are."

Misaki groaned loudly, smacking a pillow over their face. "WHYYYY."

Angel laughed. "Face it, dude. You already care."

"I DO NOT—"

"Yes, you do."

"I AM NOT—"

"Yes, you do."

Misaki groaned louder, kicking their legs. "UGHHHHHHHHHH."

V just chuckled. "You can keep lying to yourself. But we’ll be here when you eventually eat your words."

Misaki dramatically pointed at their screen. "MARK MY WORDS. I will not fall for this person."

Ronin smirked. "Yeah, yeah. Sure."

Angel hummed. "We’ll check back in a month."

V sighed. "A week."

Misaki groggily cracked one eye open, blinking at the dim light seeping through their window. Something felt off. Their brain, still half-asleep, took a few seconds to piece it together.

The clock.

They shot up. 9PM.

“OH SHIT.”

They scrambled out of bed, nearly face-planting as they tripped over their own bag. "I SLEPT SO LONG—WHY DID NO ONE WAKE ME UP?!" Their first day here and they already looked like some lazy freeloader. The impressions? SO BAD.

And worse—FREE FOOD.

They were supposed to eat with their landlord. That was the deal. The agreement. And now? They were about to walk in like some sleep-deprived goblin asking for scraps. No, no, no, I need to salvage this—

Still in their slightly rumpled clothes, they rushed out into the hallway—only to pause.

Why was it so dark?

Like, yeah, okay, it was night. But this wasn’t just regular night darkness. This was horror movie darkness. The kind where someone would definitely get jump-scared if this were a film.

"...Maybe they thought I was still sleeping and didn’t want to disturb me?" they mumbled to themselves, rubbing their arms.

Still, that meant their landlord was up. And they were probably in the kitchen.

Misaki crept forward, heart pounding from both oversleep anxiety and the eerie vibe of the house. They reached the kitchen door and, taking a deep breath, swung it open.

And immediately wished they hadn’t.

Because there, standing at the counter, was their landlord.

Covered in blood.

Chopping human hands.

"...What."

The sound of a knife steadily hitting the wooden cutting board was the only thing filling the silence. The metallic scent in the air? That was not normal food.

Misaki, frozen, stared at the scene before them. The dim kitchen light flickered just enough to make it worse. Their landlord, sleeves rolled up, hands stained red, expression completely blank.

Their mouth moved before their brain could stop it.

“...Uh. H-Halloween props?”

Their landlord didn’t even blink. Their voice was dry. Flat. “It’s human meat.”

Misaki gawked. Then screeched, “YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO AGREE WITH ME!”

Their landlord just went back to chopping. “You asked. I answered.”

"LIE TO ME, DAMN IT."

The chopping continued. Misaki, still standing in the doorway like a dumbass, did their best not to freak the hell out.

Okay. Okay. There were two options here.

Run.

Pretend this isn’t happening and get some free food.

...Misaki was so hungry.

But also. THIS WAS REALLY BAD.

They swallowed thickly. "O-Okay. Haha. Funny prank. Y-You got me. W-Wait—wait, actually, this is a prank, right? Like, like, come on. Haha, Misaki’s an idiot, they fell for it, right? Hahahaha—"

Their landlord finally looked up, blinking at them.

"...You missed dinner."

Misaki blinked back. THAT'S NOT AN ANSWER.

They forced a stiff smile. "Haha. Yeah. Super sorry about that. But, uh, back to the insanely concerning thing you’re doing—"

Their landlord sighed, sounding just...so unbelievably tired. "Do you want food or not?"

Misaki’s stomach betrayed them instantly.

A loud, miserable growl echoed through the kitchen.

Silence.

Misaki wanted to die.

Their landlord just went back to chopping. “Sit down.”

Misaki’s legs moved before their survival instincts could stop them. WHAT WAS WRONG WITH THEM.

They plopped into a chair at the kitchen table, brain screaming at them the whole time. This is bad, this is bad, this is—

A plate was placed in front of them. A steaming dish of...something.

Misaki stared at it.

Their landlord sat across from them. Staring. Expression unreadable.

Misaki picked up their chopsticks very slowly.

"...So. Haha. Just to clarify. What...exactly...is in this?"

Their landlord took a sip of their tea. "Food."

"...But, like. What food?"

A long pause. Too long.

"...Meat."

"What kind of meat?"

Another pause.

Misaki squinted.

Their landlord sighed. "Not human."

Misaki exhaled so hard they nearly passed out. "THANK YOU." They hesitantly took a bite, still on edge but way too hungry to care anymore.

"...It’s good," they mumbled through their mouthful.

Their landlord shrugged. "I know."

Silence settled between them as they ate.

Eventually, Misaki, unable to let it go, squinted again. "So, like. If I didn’t walk in on you just now, were you gonna tell me about the whole...human hands thing?"

Their landlord sighed like they had the worst headache. "...I was going to clean up before you woke up."

"*Oh, so you had a PLAN.**"

"Yes. Until you ruined it."

"SORRY FOR WAKING UP AND CATCHING YOU WITH BODY PARTS."

"Noted."

You let out a tired sigh, rubbing the back of your neck as you casually wiped the blood off the knife. “It’s nothing. Just some weird-looking shit.”

Your eyebags were doing all the talking for you. They were deep, dark, and probably had their own tragic backstory at this point. Combined with the blank, sleep-deprived expression on your face, you looked exactly like the type of person who’d chase someone down a dark alley with a kitchen knife—except you were too tired to actually run, so you’d probably just slowly walk after them like some unstoppable horror villain.

You smiled.

And not a comforting smile.

A dead inside but definitely hiding something smile.

Misaki, for some reason, just sat there, staring at you like they were contemplating something deep. You waited. And then, out of nowhere—

“…NGL, you do look kinda hot with eyebags.”

You blinked. “What?”

Misaki immediately sat up straight. “NOTHING.”

Your exhausted brain short-circuited for a moment. You knew you looked terrifying. This was not a “hot person” moment. You were literally covered in blood, and they had the audacity to say that?

You squinted at them. “Are you flirting with me while I’m holding a knife?”

Misaki, shoving more food into their mouth to escape the situation, spoke through their chewing. “Hahhaha what nooooo you misheard me anyway sooo you’re a serial killer?”

You sighed, pushing the knife aside. “No.”

“…A cannibal?”

“No.”

“Serial killer?”

“No.”

“Cannibal?”

“No.”

“…Serial killer cannibal?”

You stared at them, absolutely deadpan.

“Cannibal serial?”

The stare continued.

“…Cereal?”

You rested your chin in your hand, blinking at them very slowly, like a tired cat contemplating murder.

“If you’re thinking about calling the police,” you finally said, voice dry and smug, “just know you can’t.”

Misaki raised a brow. “And why is that?”

You gave them a look, gesturing vaguely at their whole situation. “You see, Mx. Misaki—” (you dragged out their name for extra dramatic effect) “—you are completely fine.”

Misaki paused, chopsticks halfway to their mouth. “I feel like I should disagree with that.”

You shrugged, leaning back in your chair with the most exhausted but smug expression ever. “No, you won’t. If you were that desperate for a place to stay, why would you start questioning things now?”

Silence.

Misaki hated that you had a point.

You let your head tilt to the side slightly, your tired smile stretching just a bit. Your overgrown bangs crossed over your face, casting shadows over your already dark-circled eyes. You looked crazy. Like, the kind of crazy that wasn’t even trying to be threatening—it was just naturally unsettling.

And yet, somehow, it worked.

Misaki sat there, staring at you like they were trying to process several emotions at once.

They squinted. Then they sighed. “God. Damn it.”

You arched a brow. “Problem?”

Misaki rubbed their temples. “No, it’s fine, I just… really, really hate that you’re kinda right.”

You chuckled, pushing their contract across the table. “Good. Now, are you actually gonna sign, or do I have to sit here and look at you until you cave?”

Misaki snatched the pen. “You’re terrifying.”

“You’re still here.”

“Shut up.”

They quickly scribbled their name on the contract. And, in a moment of true genius, wrote Misaki—except they added a little meow at the end.

You squinted at it.

You stretched your arms over your head, your bones cracking like a horror movie sound effect. “Alright, you can sleep now. Unless…” You tilted your head, that same eerie, exhausted smile tugging at your lips. “You wanna watch me cut?”

Misaki immediately recoiled. “No!? Nah, ewww, bro. The hell!?”

You chuckled, eyes half-lidded with exhaustion. “It’s okay. Just know this, Misaki…” You let your smile linger as you picked up the knife again, voice dropping to something too casual for the situation. “…I know where your room is.”

Misaki stared at you. Then, very slowly, nodded. “Yes. Because… we live in the same apartment.”

“Exactly.” You grinned, tapping the blade against the cutting board. “Just making sure you remember.”

There was a pause before Misaki narrowed their eyes. “…Are you actually gonna eat it?”

“Yes.” You said it so matter-of-factly, like it was just a regular grocery store steak.

Misaki gagged. “BRO.”

“Waste of meat otherwise,” you replied, moving the chopped… pieces into a storage container like this was just your regular meal prep. “I’ll store it.”

Misaki looked so deeply disturbed. “You look like a whole-ass horror movie antagonist right now.”

“Yes,” you said, unbothered, still focused on your work. “I am a mess. Last time, the dry cleaners didn’t believe it was just suit paint. Had to be real careful.”

Misaki rubbed their face. “Jesus. The fact that I don’t even know if you’re joking or not is crazy.”

You glanced up from your task, eyes dark and unreadable. “Don’t try anything stupid, Misaki.”

They stiffened slightly. “Uh. Yeah. Of course not.” They pointed a thumb toward the hallway. “I’m just… gonna go this way…”

You gave a slow nod. “And I’m gonna stay here…” You trailed off, staring blankly at the cutting board.

Misaki hesitated. “And… do what you do…”

You smiled again, soft and exhausted. “Good night, Misaki.”

They stood there for another second, just long enough to question every single life choice that led them to this moment. Then, very quickly, they left.

Because if they stayed in that kitchen any longer, they were pretty sure they were going to start questioning their sanity.

Misaki slammed their door shut so hard the walls rattled. They didn’t care. Their heart was pounding in their chest, adrenaline coursing through their veins. They pressed their back against the door, locking it in one swift motion before triple-checking that it was actually locked.

They had just walked in on their new landlord butchering human hands.

HUMAN. HANDS.

They squeezed their eyes shut and took a deep breath.

Okay.

This was fine.

This was so fine that their fingers trembled as they fumbled with their phone, opening the group chat and pressing the call button for the three people they trusted most in this world.

📞 Calling: Ronin, Angel, V.

Each ring made their pulse spike. Misaki was practically vibrating with panic by the time someone finally picked up.

“Who died?” V’s voice came through first—sharp, unimpressed, and already so incredibly done.

“I DID.” Misaki whisper-screamed, throwing themselves onto their bed and clutching the phone like a lifeline. “I JUST FOUND OUT MY LANDLORD IS A SERIAL KILLER—ACTUALLY, NO—A SERIAL CANNIBAL.”

Silence.

It stretched on for a few painful seconds before Ronin, always the worst possible person in situations like these, finally spoke up:

“That’s so f*cking cool.”

“SHUT UP, GOREBIY.” V immediately snapped. “MISAKI, GET OUT. NOW.”

Angel, normally chaotic, actually sounded concerned. “Wait, wait, wait, explain. Are they, like… bad bad? Or just… you know… manageable?”

“OKAY,” Misaki took a deep, shaky breath. “So, I woke up, right? And I go to the kitchen—AND THEY’RE JUST CHOPPING UP HUMAN HANDS.”

Ronin whistled. “Damn. Whole hands? That’s commitment.”

V exhaled sharply, like they were personally suffering. “MISAKI.”

Angel hummed. “…Maybe they just like fresh ingredients.”

Misaki squinted. “Angel.”

Angel cleared their throat. “I—I mean—that’s weird! Super weird! Ha ha! Who would do that?! Not me.”

“You absolutely would, and you’re in denial.” Misaki deadpanned before continuing. “ANYWAY, I was like, ‘bro, is this some kind of Halloween prop or something?’ AND THEY JUST—THEY JUST DRYLY WENT, ‘IT’S HUMAN MEAT.’”

V: “LEAVE. GET OUT. CALL THE COPS.”

Ronin: “WHY WOULD YOU CALL THE COPS? THIS IS FREE CONTENT.”

V: “I SWEAR TO GOD, RONIN.”

Misaki flopped onto their back, exasperated. “NO, Y’ALL, LOOK. They seem chill. I don’t think they’re gonna eat me. I’m just saying—THEY’RE A SERIAL KILLER, LIKE US.”

Silence.

A heavy, judgmental silence.

V: “…That does not make it better.”

Angel: “That kinda makes it better.”

Ronin: “That definitely makes it better.”

V: “I NEED NEW FRIENDS.”

Misaki sat up, grinning. “Look, I swear, I think they’re cool. A little dead inside. A little tired of life. A little unhinged. But, like, in a fun way.”

“…Misaki.” Angel sighed. “Tell me the truth.”

“Yeah?”

Angel sounded incredibly unimpressed. “Did you think they looked hot?”

Silence.

A very dangerous silence.

Then, Ronin burst into laughter.

“OH MY GOD.”

V groaned like they were physically in pain.

Angel sighed, exasperated. “You’re so hopeless.”

“I—” Misaki felt personally attacked. “OKAY, LISTEN, IN MY DEFENSE—THEY HAD A PINK APRON ON.”

V: “WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING!??”

Ronin: “NO, WAIT, I SEE THE VISION.”

Angel: “Honestly, I kinda get it.”

V: “STOP AGREEING WITH THIS.”

Misaki pointed at nothing. “They looked extremely messy and hot. Like, imagine eyebags so bad it looks like they’ve been awake for years. They had the tired, dead-inside psycho look but with, like, a pink ‘Kiss the Cook’ apron.”

“…Oh my God.” V sounded like he were suffering.

Angel sighed. “Fine. I won’t tell you to run. But. If they start getting weird with you—”

“WEIRDER.” V corrected.

“—you call us immediately, alright?”

Misaki saluted. “Aye aye, captain.”

V groaned louder. “I’m going to find you a new place. Don’t die before then.”

“No promises.” Misaki grinned.

And with that, they hung up, absolutely pleased with themselves.

Because, let’s be honest.

This was gonna be fun.

For the first few days, things were… weirdly normal.

Sure, their landlord was a serial killer and a cannibal, but Misaki had seen worse. They were alive, weren’t they? Not chopped up in the fridge? Not marinated in some mystery sauce? That was a win.

Besides, they had their own room, cheap rent, and, most importantly—free shit.

Like, actual free shit.

Their landlord didn’t just let them stay, they gave them access to everything.

Netflix? Free. Wi-Fi? Free. Streaming services? Free. Some random subscription to an online manga site? Also free.

All just handed over.

Misaki had barely even asked. One offhand comment about boredom, and boom.

"Oh. Here. Just use mine."

BRO.

They were living the life.

Their job wasn’t too bad, either. As long as they kept doing their work remotely, no one cared. Meanwhile, their landlord was busy being a corporate slave—dragging themselves to their soul-sucking job every single morning and coming back more and more dead inside.

But hey. That was their problem.

Misaki? Misaki was thriving.

At least… until today.

Misaki woke up to a noise.

It wasn’t an alarming noise, per se, but it was… consistent. A weird, low dragging sound.

Their brain, still foggy with sleep, immediately jumped to the worst conclusion.

Oh no. They’re dragging a corpse again, aren’t they?

Great. Fantastic. How wonderful.

They rolled over, pulling the blanket over their head. Maybe if they ignored it, they could go back to sleep.

...But the sound didn't stop.

If anything, it started sounding worse.

Like something falling.

Something heavy.

That... didn’t sound like a body.

Curious—and slightly concerned—Misaki sighed, pushing themselves up. They dragged their feet as they left their room, rubbing their eyes. The hallway was dark as hell, but they could vaguely make out the shape of their landlord collapsed on the floor.

...What.

What.

Panic immediately shot through their body.

"OH, SHIT."

They rushed forward, kneeling beside them. "HEY, HEY, WAKE UP—WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?"

Their landlord groaned, eyes fluttering open. They looked **even worse than usual—**which was impressive, considering they always looked like they’d been awake for seventy-two hours straight.

Misaki frowned. “Dude, what the hell? You okay?”

Their landlord sighed.

Then, in a deep, tired, deadpan voice, they muttered:

"I hate my job."

…

Misaki blinked.

"Bro, you just fainted. Are you dying?"

"No. I just hate my job."

"Okay, but like. Why."

Their landlord slowly sat up, rubbing their face. "Because it's hell."

"That’s not a reason."

They groaned, dragging a hand down their face. "I deal with the dumbest people imaginable. Every day. Just absolute idiots. My boss is a parasite. My coworkers are stupid. And my clients? Even worse."

Misaki hummed. “Sounds like hell, alright.”

Their landlord exhaled sharply. “I swear, I would rather be—” They suddenly froze, seeming to remember who they were talking to.

A fellow criminal.

A fellow killer.

Someone who would absolutely call them out.

They cleared their throat. “Uh. Metaphorically.”

Misaki snorted. “Sure, sure. Totally not suspicious.”

Their landlord just groaned.

They looked so done with life. So exhausted. So miserable.

And—ugh. Misaki was starting to feel bad.

Like, yeah, their landlord was a murderous cannibal, but they are nice!

Misaki sighed as they trudged toward the kitchen, rubbing their face. The day had already been too much, and now they had to figure out what to cook for you, of all people.

You, the psychotic, dead-eyed, possibly-a-murderer-but-still-weirdly-chill roommate.

Still, they did feel kinda bad for you. Not bad enough to ignore the human meat in the fridge, but bad enough to cook something edible.

They pushed the kitchen door open—

Only to suddenly get shoved against the table.

Their back hit the surface with a dull thud, and before they could even process what happened, there you were.

Standing over them.

Looking at them.

STUDYING them.

Like a damn predator.

Misaki’s heart jumped. Their entire body locked up, every survival instinct they had screaming at them to run.

And then—

Then, their eyes drifted down.

And they saw the shirt you were wearing.

They blinked.

Once.

Twice.

HUMAN BY CHANCE, ALPHA BY CHOICE.

They just stared.

Dead.

Silent.

As if their soul had physically left their body.

Three full seconds passed before they finally spoke.

“…You cannot be serious.”

You tilted your head. “What?”

Misaki slowly lifted a hand and pointed. “THAT. WHAT YOU’RE WEARING.”

You glanced down at the godforsaken t-shirt, completely unbothered. “Oh. It was on sale.”

“OF COURSE IT WAS.”

“I think it’s funny.”

“IT’S NOT.”

You ignored their entire reaction. Instead, you just stared at them again.

And then you spoke.

“You look really delicious right now.”

Misaki blinked.

They froze.

Their brain completely short-circuited.

“…Th-thanks? I try?” They ran a hand through their hair, suddenly hyper-aware of their own appearance. “I mean, I thought I was average-looking, but—”

Wait.

WAIT.

HOLD ON.

Their brain finally caught up with the situation.

Misaki jerked back in horror.

“BRO. I’M NOT FOOD. GET THE HELL OUT.”

You snorted. “Relax. I promised I wouldn’t eat you.”

Misaki squinted. “That doesn’t make this less creepy.”

“I just wanted to take a look at you.”

“FOR WHAT?!”

You shrugged. Your eyes scanned them, like you were inspecting something. Calculating.

Then, suddenly—

“What’s with the gun?”

Misaki stiffened.

They immediately reached for their holster, confirming their weapon was still there. “...What?”

“You’re armed,” you said simply. “Why?”

Misaki scowled. “Uh, duh, I’m not stupid? I just moved in with a cannibal. You think I wouldn’t bring a gun?”

You blinked. Then, without hesitation—

“What kind of a killer are you?”

“EXCUSE ME?”

You gestured vaguely. “You’re clearly trained. What’s your thing?”

Misaki’s eye twitched.

“…I’m an assassin.”

You stared.

“…Oh.”

Silence.

More silence.

Then—

“So you’re bad too.”

Misaki threw their hands up. “OH, AND YOU’RE SO SAINTLY?”

“No, I’m just saying. You kill people too.”

“THAT DOESN’T MEAN WE’RE THE SAME.”

You tilted your head, watching them. “Why do you do it?”

Misaki exhaled sharply. “Because I’m broke.”

“...That’s it?”

“I have debts.” They crossed their arms. “Paying for my parents.”

You froze.

The air shifted.

For the first time, you didn’t have anything to say.

Misaki narrowed their eyes. “What? Surprised?”

“…No.” Your voice was quieter now.

Misaki was still standing in the kitchen, arms crossed, replaying the last five minutes of their life in their head like a buffering video.

What the hell just happened?

They had been ready to make you food because, surprise surprise, even unhinged serial killer cannibals needed to eat actual meals sometimes. Then, suddenly, BAM. They got slammed against the table, stared at like a premium cut of wagyu steak, and then hit with the existential crisis of realizing their creepy, horrifying, serial-killer housemate might not be as emotionless and dead inside as they originally thought.

And now? Now, they were standing there, hands in their pockets, watching as you wandered back into the kitchen like nothing happened.

Like you hadn’t just acted like some kind of deranged, sleep-deprived maniac in a cursed T-shirt.

You looked at them, tilting your head slightly, before rubbing the back of your neck.

“...Maybe I’ve fallen for you.”

Misaki choked on their own spit.

“I’M SORRY, WHAT—”

You sighed like this was some grand, tragic confession instead of the most batshit insane thing you could possibly say at this moment.

“I usually eat my housemates,” you said casually.

“EXCUSE ME?”

You nodded. “Yeah. Two so far. Both gone in a day.”

Misaki took a full step back. “What the actual—”

“But you feel different,” you continued, like you hadn’t just admitted to literal cannibalistic homicide. “I don’t want to eat you.”

“Oh, WHAT A RELIEF.”

“You make me feel… energized.” You stared at them, brows furrowed slightly, like you were still trying to figure it out yourself.

Misaki swallowed, every muscle in their body tense. Should they be running? Because they should probably be running.

And then—

“So, do you want to eat together?”

Misaki blinked.

“Do I want to—HELL NO.”

You shrugged, completely unfazed. “Okay.”

Silence.

Then you tilted your head, as if a new idea suddenly popped into your deranged little mind.

“Do you want to be lovers?”

Misaki’s brain blue-screened.

“WHAT.”

You nodded, still way too casual about this whole thing. “Lovers. Dating. Romance. That stuff.”

Misaki stared at you.

Long.

Hard.

As if staring at you long enough would force you to make sense.

It did not.

“What the actual hell are you talking about.”

“I’m saying we should date,” you said, blinking at them like they were the weird one here.

Misaki took another step back. “WE HAVEN’T EVEN BONDED.”

“Okay,” you said with a slow nod, like you were completely open to negotiation.

“Okay?”

“Do you want to marry me instead?”

“WHAT. THE. ACTUAL. HELL.”

You just blinked at them again, waiting for a response like this was some totally normal topic of conversation.

Misaki dragged a hand down their face. “Dude. We haven’t even—WHY is that the next logical step?!”

You shrugged. “I don’t know. But I am falling for you.”

“OH MY GOD.”

Silence.

More silence.

And then, as if suddenly struck with divine inspiration, Misaki sighed deeply and crossed their arms. “Fine.”

You tilted your head.

Misaki smirked. “I’ll give you a challenge.”

You raised a brow. “A challenge?”

“Yeah,” they said, grinning. “February. It’s the month of love, right?”

You just nodded.

Misaki leaned in, poking your forehead lightly. “You wanna win my heart? You got one month to make me like you back.”

You stared at them, processing.

Misaki’s smirk grew. “And if I do like you by the end of February, then maaaybe we’ll talk about this ‘lovers’ thing.”

You were quiet for a long moment.

Then, with that same exhausted, dead-eyed expression, you nodded.

“Okay.”

“Okay?”

You nodded again. “Yeah. Also, you don’t have to pay rent for February.”

Misaki paused.

“...Wait. Hold up. What?”

“No rent,” you repeated. “February’s free.”

Their eyes narrowed. “Are you… bribing me?”

“Yes.”

Misaki grinned. 'Okay!'

IT'S NOT OKAY

Misaki collapsed onto their bed like a ragdoll, face buried in their pillow as their entire soul reeled from the conversation they just had.

What the hell was happening.

They had moved in less than a week ago. Found out their landlord was a literal serial killer/cannibal. Somehow weren’t dead yet. And now?? Now their psychotic, sleep-deprived, blood-covered housemate was falling for them??

What kind of romantic horror-comedy bullshit was this??

And worse, WHY was the rent-free month kinda tempting?!

Misaki groaned into their pillow before rolling over and grabbing their phone. They needed backup. NOW.

They dialed The Chaos Hotline.

Aka: Angel, Ronin, and V.

Within seconds, V picked up.

“Misaki,” V said immediately, tone suspicious. “You never call. What happened.”

Ronin’s voice piped in from the background. “Oh, oh, is this about the cannibal landlord? Are they hot?”

Misaki sat up. “WHY is that your first question?!”

“Because it’s important.”

Angel sighed. “Misaki, please tell me you didn’t get into a hostage situation again.”

“No! I mean—maybe?! I don’t know!” Misaki ran a hand through their hair. “Okay, LISTEN. They—they confessed to me.”

Silence.

Then—

“What?” V sounded like Misaki just committed a war crime.

“LMAO” – Ronin.

“Holy shit.” – Angel.

Misaki flopped back on the bed. “I don’t know how it happened!! One second they were staring at me like a five-star wagyu steak, and the next they were like, ‘I think I’m falling for you.’”

Angel gasped. “You made the serial killer catch feelings?”

Ronin wheezed. “BASED.”

V was not having it. “Misaki. Get. Out.”

“Dude, they said I don’t have to pay rent for February.”

“STAY.” – Ronin.

“OH MY GOD.” – V.

Angel hummed. “So… ”

Misaki clenched their fists. “STOP ASKING THAT.”

“Which means yes,” Angel said smugly.

“I—LOOK. I MAY HAVE SLIPPED AND CALLED THEM HOT, OKAY?!”

More silence.

Then:

Ronin. Wheezing. “You—YOU LIKE THEM TOO, DON’T YOU?!”

Misaki exploded. “I DO NOT LIKE THEM BACK. I JUST THINK THEY LOOK KINDA HOT COVERED IN BLOOD. IT’S AESTHETICALLY PLEASING, OKAY?!”

V. Exasperated. “MISAKI.”

“I’M NOT.”

“You’re literally getting romanced by a serial killer, and you’re already calling them hot when they’re covered in human remains.”

Misaki groaned. “This is not happening. This is a stress response.”

Ronin snorted. “Sure, buddy. Keep telling yourself that.”

V sounded done. “Okay, so what’s your plan? Because if they’re a serial killer, you probably shouldn’t lead them on.”

Misaki hesitated.

“…I may or may not have made a deal.”

Angel perked up. “Oh?”

Misaki winced. “I told them… that if they can make me fall for them by the end of February, then maybe we can talk about the ‘lovers’ thing.”

Silence.

Then:

Ronin. Losing their absolute shit. “MISAKI, WHAT THE HELL?!”

Angel cackling. “THIS IS A ROM-COM.”

V. “MISAKI, THAT’S NOT HOW YOU HANDLE A CANNIBAL KILLER.”

“I PANICKED, OKAY?!?!”

Ronin was dying. “You gave a cannibal a dating challenge?!”

“Yes??”

“Bro.”

Misaki groaned, covering their face. What the hell was their life.

Angel giggled. “So what’s their next move, you think? Romantic dinner date? Valentine’s Day surprise? Ooo, what if they give you a human heart in a box?!”

Misaki shuddered. “PLEASE don’t manifest that into the universe.”

V sighed. “You need to be careful, Misaki. If they actually get attached, that’s dangerous.”

Misaki huffed. “Relax. I got this. I’ll make sure they fall out of love before the month ends.”

Ronin snorted. “Or you’ll fall for them first.”

Misaki scowled. “No chance in hell.”

Angel smirked. “We’ll see.”

[gunsandspaceships]

"Tony kidnapped Peter"

I see a new type of smear campaign in Tony's tag. This means it's time to address "Tony kidnapped Peter in CW".

Allegations:

Let's investigate the case.

"Kidnapping is a violent crime of taking away someone against their will, and normally involves holding them in false imprisonment or confining them against their will. It could involve forcing a person into a vehicle and taking them to another location, or even locking them up in room to prevent escape."

In general, U.S. law states that a removal or confinement of a person is unlawful if it is accomplished by force or threat. In the case of a minor under the age of 14 - if it is accomplished without the consent of a parent or guardian.

There was no force or threats. Neither Peter was under the age of 14. But let's talk about consent anyway.

There is no legal requirement that a minor traveling alone to another country from the United States have the consent of his or her legal guardian. Some countries recommend or require an informal letter of consent, which may include an itinerary (where and when the trip will take place) but does not require a description of the activities.

However, consent from a legal guardian is required to apply for a U.S. passport, but it does not require consent for specific travel abroad and can be proven by the guardian's simple presence during the application process.

As we know, Aunt May was not against Peter's vigilante activities after she found out that he was Spider-Man. If she knew everything about him and the trip, we can conclude that she would have given her consent anyway.

Tony received Peter and May's consent, as well as all the necessary documents (the passport states "Date of issue: May 03, 2016"). He told May that they were going on a "field trip", which was not a lie. As we see in SMH, Peter was indeed on a field trip in Germany.

What is the definition of a field trip? It is a visit of a place (within the country or abroad) made (by students/interns) for purposes of firsthand observation or experience.

Tony officially appointed Peter as his intern and took him on a field trip for first-hand observation and experience, which in this case involved assisting law enforcement officials in preventing crime or, in the worst case, without engaging in combat, apprehending fugitives by using his climbing ability and webbing to limit the fugitives' ability to use weapons or escape.

Btw, such law enforcement internship programs for minors exist in real life.

Was Peter forced to do something? No. And even if someone tried to force him, don't forget who Peter is. Super strength is one of his abilities.

Was he locked up, confined or imprisoned? No.

Was he blackmailed, as some claim? No. Read this post for details.

Did he lie to his legal guardian about who he was and ask Tony to hide the truth about his alter ego and the purpose of the trip? ​​Yes.

Could he say a categorical "no" and stay home? Yes.

Could he refuse to go anywhere and do anything that he did there at any time? Yes.

But he went, did more than he was asked, enjoyed himself, got a black eye because he disobeyed Tony and got into a close combat, and was returned home safely (which, by the way, he didn't want to do, but Tony insisted).

(You are very bad at kidnapping, Tony. It works the other way)

Next time, these accusers should explain to us why it is not a crime to smuggle people to another country to help fugitives fight law enforcement.

[probablyasocialecologist]

YouTube says it will intentionally cripple the playback of its videos in third-party apps that block its ads. A Monday post in YouTube's help forum notes netizens using applications that strip out adverts while streaming YouTube videos may encounter playback issues due to buffering or error messages indicating that the content is not available. "We want to emphasize that our terms don’t allow third-party apps to turn off ads because that prevents the creator from being rewarded for viewership, and Ads on YouTube help support creators and let billions of people around the world use the streaming service," said a YouTube team member identified as Rob. "We also understand that some people prefer an entirely ad-free experience, which is why we offer YouTube Premium." This crackdown is coming at the API level, as these outside apps use this interface to access the Google-owned giant's videos. Last year, YouTube acknowledged it was running scripts to detect ad-blocking extensions in web browsers, which ended up interfering with Firefox page loads and prompted a privacy complaint to Ireland's Data Protection Commission. And several months before that, the internet video titan experimented with popup notifications warning YouTube web visitors that ad-blocking software is not allowed. A survey published last month by Ghostery, a maker of software that promotes privacy by blocking ads and tracking scripts, found that Google's efforts to crack down on ad blocking made about half of respondents (49 percent) more willing to use an ad blocker. According to the survey, the majority of Americans now use advert blockers, something recommended by the FBI when conducting internet searches.

Download NewPipe, it's what I use on Android

[hikakaomybeloveds]

FELLOW TUMBLR USERS WHO ARE ALSO WRITERS WHO HATE GENERATIVE AI BUT USE GOOGLE DOCS DESPITE ITS AI SCRAPING AND CONSTANT PUSHING OF GEMINI BECAUSE THEY DON'T KNOW A GOOD, FREE ALTERNATIVE

I NEED TO PUT Y'ALL ON SOMETHING

MEET ELLIPSUS.

IF U WANT AN ALL-AROUND FANTASTIC, COMPLETELY FREE, WEB-BASED GDOCS ALTERNATIVE. USE ELLIPSUS.

SERIOUSLY, IT IS BETTER THAN GOOGLE DOCS IN LITERALLY EVERY WAY.

PROS:

-DRAFTS FEATURE CAN BE USED TO STORE NECESSARY INFORMATION SUCH AS EXCERPTS U PLAN ON PUTTING LATER ON IN WHATEVER UR WRITING, CHARACTER NAMES AND BACKSTORIES, ETC. EVEN IF U AREN'T USING THEM FOR COLLABORATION PURPOSES. I HAVE A DRAFT TO PUT ALL MY AO3 TAGS IN FOR EVERY FIC I WRITE

-THERE'S A TIMER BUILT-IN. WANT TO START CREATING A HABIT OF WRITING FOR A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF TIME EACH DAY? OPEN UP ELLIPSUS, CREATE A NEW DOC, START THE TIMER, AND GO.

-FOCUS MODE. OH MY GOD FOCUS MODE. I USE IT EVERY TIME I PROOFREAD ANYTHING. GETS RID OF THE WHOLE MENU, LEAVING YOU JUST THE TEXT. ICONIC

-THERE'S SO MANY THEMES. LIGHT, DARK, ULTRA DARK (MY PERSONAL FAVORITE), SEPIA, NATURE, THERE'S EVEN PRIDE THEMES CURRENTLY (LIGHT AND DARK). LIFESAVER FOR PEOPLE LIKE ME WHO HAVE SENSORY ISSUES AND HATE WHEN SHIT IS TOO BRIGHT

-WAY BETTER DEFAULT FONT THAN GOOGLE DOCS. I'M SORRY I AM FRANKLY SICK OF ACTING LIKE ARIEL IS NOT ONE OF THE WORST FONTS EVER. ELLIPSUS USES THE GENUINELY GORGEOUS "LITERATA" AS ITS DEFAULT FONT

-COLLABORATION! U CAN COLLABORATE! U CAN SHARE DOCUMENTS, U CAN COLLABORATE IN REAL-TIME JUST LIKE IN GOOGLE DOCS, EVERYTHING.

-GUYS. GUYS THERE'S AN EXPORT TO AO3 OPTION. U CAN CONNECT UR AO3, AND WHEN U'RE FINISHED WRITING, CLICK THAT "EXPORT TO AO3" BUTTON, AND ELLIPSUS WILL COPY UR ENTIRE WORK IN HTML AND OPEN AO3 IN ANOTHER TAB. A FUCKING LIFESAVER

-THERE'S A FOLDER SYSTEM. U CAN CREATE FOLDERS, AND THEN SUB-FOLDERS WITHIN THOSE FOLDERS. GENUINELY AMAZING FOR PEOPLE LIKE ME WHO WRITE A LOT BUT HATE HAVING A CLUTTERED WORKSPACE. I LITERALLY HAVE 140 WORKS ON ELLIPSUS BUT YOU KNOW WHAT MY DASHBOARD SHOWS? MY 8 FOLDERS.

-IT AUTOMATICALLY SHOWS YOUR WORD COUNT. U DON'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING TO SEE IT EXCEPT SCROLL UP. AMAZING.

-AUTOMATICALLY CREATES AN OUTLINE WHEN U PUT HEADINGS ON YOUR DOCUMENT, ALLOWING FOR EASY NAVIGATION BETWEEN SECTIONS.

-NO GENERATIVE AI. EVER. NO AI SCRAPING, NO AI ASSISTANT SHOVED IN YOUR FACE, NOTHING.

CONS:

-IT'S WEB-BASED, SO NO APP ON MOBILE (ALTHOUGH IT DOES RUN INCREDIBLY WELL ON MOBILE) AND NO DESKTOP APPLICATION. THAT'S IT. THAT'S LITERALLY THE ONLY CON.

MAKE AN ACCOUNT. TRANSFER YOUR STUFF OVER FROM GOOGLE DOCS. USE IT INSTEAD. U WILL NOT REGRET IT

[picknmixsims]

Sims 2 Tools - SceneGraph Plus

SceneGraph Plus

SceneGraph Plus is an application to display and manipulate scene graph (mesh and material) resources.

While it is similar to SimPe's scenegrapher, it has major differences:

it is a standalone application;

it can open and write multiple .package files simultaneously;

it displays all connections between resources, and not just those in the chain starting at the "top-most" resources;

it understands recolours (MMAT/GZPS/XMOL/XTOL), wall/floor coverings (XOBJ), fence (XFNC) and roof (XROF) scenegraph chains;

it understands links from STR# resources (0x0085 Model Names to CRES and 0x0088 Material Names to TXMT);

it supports renaming resources - maintaining the integrity of the chain (both names and TGIR values);

it supports relinking resources - enabling broken chains to be repaired.

A scenegraph chain with multiple issues

The same scenegraph chain after fixing directly within the app

A complex scenegraph chain across multiple files (one for the mesh, one for the recolours and one for the materials.)

TXMT, TXTR and LIFO resources can be viewed.

Lots more details, and an introductory video, on the web page.

[xhxhxhx]

Today, the Supreme Court handed down opinions in TikTok Inc. v. Garland, No. 24-656, slip op. (U.S. Jan. 17, 2025), sustaining the federal law banning the social media platform.

For my own sake, I tried to figure out what the law says and does, bracketing the First Amendment issues.

I.

The federal law at issue is the Protecting Americans from Foreign Adversary Controlled Applications Act, Pub. L. No. 118-50, div. H, 138 Stat. 955. It's a division of an April 2024 appropriations bill, a bundle that came with aid for Israel and Ukraine.

The Act targets "foreign adversary controlled applications," which it defines, in part, as applications operated by ByteDance, TikTok, their subsidiaries or successors, or any entity they own or control. § 2(g)(3)(A), 138 Stat. at 958.

The Act's prohibitions address app stores and web hosts. They're the ones who have to deny support to "foreign adversary controlled applications," and keep them off their platforms.

The Act makes it unlawful "to distribute, maintain, or update" the app by providing either (A) "a marketplace" through which users in the United States "may access, maintain, or update" the application, or (B) "internet hosting services" that enable "distribution, maintenance, or updating" for users in the United States. § 2(a)(1).

These prohibitions are only applicable to the territory of the United States and those within it. They address "carrying out, within the land or maritime borders of the United States," acts for "users within the land or maritime borders of the United States."

The territorial language, "the land and maritime borders of the United States," is not defined within the Act. Nor is it defined anywhere else in the U.S. Code. It's only used once. 6 U.S.C. § 124h(e).

That said, deducing "the land and maritime borders of the United States" should be fairly straightforward for someone familiar with the relevant boundary treaties and law of the sea, as understood by the political branches. It's just not something I understand.

II.

The Act targets "foreign adversary controlled applications," which it defines, in part, as applications operated by ByteDance, TikTok, their subsidiaries or successors, or any entity they own or control. § 2(g)(3)(A), 138 Stat. at 958.

The Act extends to covered companies "controlled by a foreign adversary," following a public notice and a public report to Congress, § 2(g)(3)(B), but ByteDance and TikTok are the only persons identified by name.

The language seems broad. But "controlled by foreign adversary" is fairly narrow. It means persons domiciled in "foreign adversary countries," entities they have a 20 percent stake in, and persons subject to their direction or control. § 2(g)(1). That's it.

The term "foreign adversary country" is defined obliquely, § 2(4), by reference to a military minerals procurement rule, 10 U.S.C. § 4872, but it only covers four countries, specified by name: North Korea, China, Russia, and Iran. 10 U.S.C. § 4872(d)(2).

The President could, in other words, ban applications operated by persons domiciled in North Korea, China, Russia, or Iran, or entities in which such persons have a 20 percent stake, or entities subject to their direction or control.

It doesn't sweep much further than that.

III.

The "foreign adversary country" limitation means the Act isn't an unconstrained delegation to the President.

It's not like the President's authority to "suspend the entry of all aliens or any class of aliens as immigrants or nonimmigrants, or impose on the entry of aliens any restrictions he may deem to be appropriate." 8 U.S.C. § 1182(f); Exec. Order No. 13,769, 82 Fed. Reg. 8977 (Jan. 27, 2017).

Nor is it like the President's authority to restrict entry from countries "designated by the Secretary of State," or "designated by the Secretary of Homeland Security." 8 U.S.C. § 1187(a)(12); Exec. Order No. 13,780, § 1(b)(i), 82 Fed. Reg. 13209 (March 6, 2017).

Nor is it like the President's claimed authority to bar "any transaction by any person, or with respect to any property, subject to the jurisdiction of the United States, with ByteDance Ltd.," Exec. Order No. 13,942, § 1(a), 85 Fed. Reg. 48637 (Aug. 6, 2020), a claim that proved wanting. TikTok Inc. v. Trump, 507 F. Supp. 3d 92 (D.D.C. 2020); Marland v. Trump, 498 F. Supp. 3d 625 (E.D. Pa. 2020).

The Act is, mercifully, is more constrained than that.

[ateamsoftsolutions01]

Effective Troubleshooting for Common Web Application Errors

Web applications are essential for many businesses, but they can encounter various errors that disrupt functionality and user experience. Effective troubleshooting is crucial for maintaining a reliable and efficient application. Here’s how to tackle common web application errors effectively.

1. Identifying the Error

Gather Information

Begin by collecting detailed information about the error. User reports, error messages, and log files are valuable resources. Replicate the issue in a test environment to understand its scope and impact. Document all observations to guide your troubleshooting process.

2. Analyzing Error Logs

Deep Dive into Logs

Error logs provide crucial insights into what went wrong. Examine the logs for error codes, stack traces, and timestamps. Use log analysis tools to identify patterns and pinpoint the source of the error. This step is vital for diagnosing complex issues that aren’t immediately apparent.

3. Common Errors and Fixes

Database Connectivity Issues

Errors like "500 Internal Server Error" often indicate database connectivity problems. Check your database server status, connection strings, and credentials. Optimize queries and ensure the database is not overloaded. Regular backups are essential to prevent data loss.

Performance Problems

Slow loading times and laggy interactions can frustrate users. Optimize your code, minimize HTTP requests, and enable browser caching. Use a Content Delivery Network (CDN) to distribute load and reduce latency. Regularly monitor performance metrics to catch issues early.

Security Vulnerabilities

Web applications are frequent targets for attacks. Implement HTTPS, use strong encryption, and update your software regularly. Conduct security audits and use web application firewalls (WAF) to protect against common threats like SQL injection and cross-site scripting (XSS).

4. Testing the Solution

Verification

After applying fixes, rigorously test your application. Use automated and manual testing methods to ensure the error is resolved and no new issues have been introduced. Validate all functionalities and perform stress tests if necessary.

Conclusion

Effective troubleshooting is essential for maintaining a smooth and reliable web application. By systematically identifying, analyzing, and resolving web application errors, you can enhance your application’s performance and user experience. Implementing proactive measures and regular maintenance will help prevent future issues, ensuring long-term stability and security.

[javascript]

Tumblr.js is back!

Hello Tumblr—your friendly neighborhood Tumblr web developers here. It’s been a while!

Remember the official JavaScript client library for the Tumblr API? tumblr.js? Well, we’ve picked it up, brushed it off, and released a new version of tumblr.js for you.

Having an official JavaScript client library for the Tumblr API means that you can interact with Tumblr in wild and wonderful ways. And we know as well as anybody how important it is to foster that kind of creativity.

Moving forward, this kind of creativity is something we’re committed to supporting. We’d love to hear about how you’re using it to build cool stuff here on Tumblr!

Some highlights:

NPF post creation is now supported via the createPost method.

The bundled TypeScript type declarations have been vastly improved and are generated from source.

Some deprecated dependencies with known vulnerabilities have been removed.

Intrigued? Have a look at the changelog or read on for more details.

Migrating

v4 includes breaking changes, so if you’re ready to upgrade to from a previous release, there are a few things to keep in mind:

The callback API has been deprecated and is expected to be removed in a future version. Please migrate to the promise API.

There is no need to use returnPromises (the method or the option). A promise will be returned when no callback is provided.

createPost is a new method for NPF posts.

Legacy post creation methods have been deprecated.

createLegacyPost is a new method with the same behavior as createPost in previous versions (rename createPost to createLegacyPost to maintain existing behavior).

The legacy post creation helpers like createPhotoPost have been removed. Use createLegacyPost(blogName, { type: 'photo' }).

See the changelog for detailed release notes.

What’s in store for the future?

We'll continue to maintain tumblr.js, but we’d like to hear from you. What do you want? How can we provide the tools for you to continue making cool stuff that makes Tumblr great?

Let us know right here or file an issue on GitHub.

Some questions for you:

We’d like to improve types to make API methods easier to use. What methods are most important to you?

Are there API methods that you miss?

Tumblr.js is a Node.js library, would you use it in the browser to build web applications?

[ukgk]

SSP PLUGIN RECOMMENDATIONS

Do you want to customize and expand your desktop buddy experience further? here are some handy links to miscellaneous plug-ins I’ve gathered from around the web, or you can even program your own, and they can also be written in any programming language so the possibilities are limitless! plug-ins are essentially  extensions or add-on built for SSP. I’m not a plugin developer myself, and have yet to test out each one of them for extended periods of time, so please refer to the readme files/ instructions provided by the developers (github usually has info) on how to use them if you get stuck or encounter issues.  these are just some of the more recently updated ones, I'll be (slowly) adding more to the plugin page of my blog if you're interested!

Do you want to customize and expand your desktop buddy experience further? here are some handy links to  plug-ins I’ve collected from around the web, or you can even program your own, plug-ins are essentially  extensions/add-ons or additional features for the SSP baseware.  there are a wide variety of different Ukagaka compatible plug-ins out there that this list hasn’t scratched the surface of yet, some even make it so seperate programs (Discord, music players such as WinAmp or Foobar2000, encoding software) can interact with Ukagaka.  a few newer ones require third party (free) software like VOICEVOX or API keys but the majority are designed to work with just the plain baseware (SSP) but refer to the individual readme files and instructions provided by the developers during setup.

forenote:

most of these will only have instructions/documentation in Japanese, I usually reccomend against machine translation but it’s probably no problem to get the gist of basic instructions!

I’m not a plugin developer, and have yet to test if all of these work with current versions of SSP or with all the compatible ghosts

to install a plugin, you can just drag it to your SSP window. 

if you have any suggestions for plugins that I haven’t included yet , please submit them here

Weather Station by Zicheq (of Ukagaka Dream Team)

A plugin for both users and devs, for getting weather data! As a developer, you can set your ghost up to receive weather data from this plugin, to then do what you will with! Weather based comments? Outfit changes? Something else totally unrelated? It’s up to you! This plugin will handle the messy details of the user inputting their location and gathering the weather data for you. … (read more here)

Discord Rich Presence by Ponapalt (main dev of SSP baseware)

This plugin is designed for displaying the name of the primary ghost you have open on the ‘currently playing’ status on the Discord for Windows application in real-time. also compatible with displaying your currently played song in FLUX (a music player ghost by Zi).

Wallet of Unyu

by Don

⚠️NOT A REAL CRYPTOSCAMCURRENCY⚠️

UNYU is a cryptocurrency widely circulated in the world of Ukagaka.

This wallet plugin allows you to freely deposit and withdraw UNYUcoin

anyone can freely withdraw however much UNYU they want, even if you want 500 trillion UNYU

 It isn’t encrypted. Transaction history is stored in plain text format in a save file.

plugin download

CeVIO-Talker V2 Plug-in

by Ambergon

This Plug-in was initially revealed for Day 21 of the Ukagaka Advent Calendar collaborative project in 2022. using this you can have a fully voiced ghost with a realistic sounding voicebank speak to you out loud! (in English too?)

it Requires ceVIO Creative Studio and SSP 2.6.45 (or newer) to work, ceVIO is a vocal synthesizer software commonly compared to Vocaloid and UTAU that works via text-to-speech method. the primary difference between Vocaloid and ceVIO is that ceVIO is built for both TTS/speech and creating vocals for songs in music production. you can download a demo of CeVIO if you would like to try it out here.

GhostSpeaker

by apxxxxxxe like CeVIO-Talker, this Plug-in was initially revealed for Day 17 of the Ukagaka Advent Calendar collaborative project in 2023. it’s a successor to the Bouyomi-chan plug-in and utilizes a free (Japanese) text-to-speech software called VOICEVOX and COEIROINK so that your ghost can verbalize their balloon dialogue and speak to you. you can listen to a demo in this github link.

GhostWardrobe

by apxxxxxxe dress-up is available by default on some ghosts but this also allows you to dress up your ghost (if compatible?) in different outfit coordinates, mix and match pieces and save and load the outfit combinations from the plugin menu.

CharameL plugin   by Umeici

This plugin allows you to enjoy watching ghosts directly interact and chat amongst each other freely on a built in instant messenger. like a chatroom for seeing what your ghosts chat together about when you’re out of the room.

Stamp Collection by http://navy.nm.land.to/post/

with this plug-in you can provide links and additional information about events to the user, sort of like your ghost collecting stamps on a card when exploring each booth at a virtual convention dealer alley or an easter egg hunt.

Functions: a YAYA type plugin that notifies the user of information about a stamp. Triggered at ghost startup, plugin loading/unloading, and any set timings for OnStampInfoCall to be sent. has been used for things like providing special links and custom dialogue for Ukagaka events or the Saimoe popularity contests. it worked when I tried but a lot of the images linked in the event dialogues for existing ghosts I tried couldn’t be reached without the assistance of the Internet Archive .

compatible ghosts and the shortcuts to use for them are listed here, and new ones are still being added to that list.

if you want to incorporate it into your own ghost, refer to  sample.txt.

BalloonMaker by Coderatte

a plugin tool for creating custom balloons. balloons are the speech bubbles/text boxes you’ll see ghosts use to speak.

older plugins (that I haven’t tested succesfully yet, may have compatibility issues with current versions of SSP)

BeerShower

baton/touch plugin    by Umeici

?

MicCom plugin    by Umeici

?

SSTP Clients

(not plugins but  refers to an external application that sends SSTP requests to the SSTP server)

Iria displays the operating process status on the dialogue balloon Kinoko

[interstellarleap]

Masterlist of Free PDF Versions of Textbooks Used in Undergrad SNHU Courses in 2025 C-1 (Jan - Mar)

Literally NONE of the Accounting books are available on libgen, they all have isbns that start with the same numbers, so I think they're made for the school or something. The single Advertising course also didn't have a PDF available.

This list could also be helpful if you just want to learn stuff

NOTE: I only included textbooks that have access codes if it was stated that you won't need the access code ANYWAY

ATH (anthropology)

only one course has an available pdf ATH-205 - In The Beginning: An Introduction to Archaeology

BIO (Biology)

BIO-205 Publication Manual of the American Psychological Association Essentials of Human Anatomy & Physiology 13th Edition

NOTE: These are not the only textbook you need for this class, I couldn't get the other one

CHE (IDK what this is)

CHE-329

The Aging Networks: A Guide to Policy, Programs, and Services

Publication Manual Of The American Psychological Association

CHE-460

Health Communication: Strategies and Skills for a New Era

Publication Manual Of The American Psychological Association

CJ (Criminal Justice)

CJ-303

The Wisdom of Psychopaths: What Saints, Spies, and Serial Killers Can Teach Us About Success

Without Conscious: The Disturbing World of the Psychopaths Among Us

CJ-308

Cybercrime Investigations: a Comprehensive Resource for Everyone

CJ-315

Victimology and Victim Assistance: Advocacy, Intervention, and Restoration

CJ-331

Community and Problem-Oriented Policing: Effectively Addressing Crime and Disorder

CJ-350

Deception Counterdeception and Counterintelligence

NOTE: This is not the only textbook you need for this class, I couldn't find the other one

CJ-405Private Security Today

CJ-408

Strategic Security Management-A Risk Assessment Guide for Decision Makers, Second Edition

COM (Communications)

COM-230

Graphic Design Solutions

COM-325McGraw-Hill's Proofreading Handbook

NOTE: This is not the only book you need for this course, I couldn't find the other one

COM-329

Media Now: Understanding Media, Culture, and Technology

COM-330The Only Business Writing Book You’ll Ever Need

NOTE: This is not the only book you need for this course, I couldn't find the other one

CS (Computer Science)

CS-319Interaction Design

CYB (Cyber Security)

CYB-200Fundamentals of Information Systems Security

CYB-240

Internet and Web Application Security

NOTE: This is not the only resource you need for this course. The other one is a program thingy

CYB-260Legal and Privacy Issues in Information Security

CYB-310

Hands-On Ethical Hacking and Network Defense (MindTap Course List)

NOTE: This is not the only resource you need for this course. The other one is a program thingy

CYB-400

Auditing IT Infrastructures for Compliance

NOTE: This is not the only resource you need for this course. The other one is a program thingy

CYB-420CISSP Official Study Guide

DAT (IDK what this is, but I think it's computer stuff)

DAT-430

Dashboard book

ECO (Economics)

ECO-322

International Economics

ENG (English)

ENG-226 (I'm taking this class rn, highly recommend. The book is good for any writer)

The Bloomsbury Introduction to Creative Writing: Second Edition

ENG-328

Ordinary genius: a guide for the poet within

ENG-329 (I took this course last term. The book I couldn't find is really not necessary, and is in general a bad book. Very ablest. You will, however, need the book I did find, and I recommend it even for people not taking the class. Lots of good short stories.)

100 years of the best American short stories

ENG-341You can't make this stuff up : the complete guide to writing creative nonfiction--from memoir to literary journalism and everything in between

ENG-347

Save The Cat! The Last Book on Screenwriting You'll Ever Need

NOTE: This i snot the only book you need for this course, I couldn't find the other one

ENG-350

Linguistics for Everyone: An Introduction

ENG-351Tell It Slant: Creating, Refining, and Publishing Creative Nonfiction

ENG-359 Crafting Novels & Short Stories: Everything You Need to Know to Write Great Fiction

ENV (Environmental Science)

ENV-101

Essential Environment 6th Edition The Science Behind the Stories

ENV-220

Fieldwork Ready: An introductory Guide to Field Research for Agriculture, Environment, and Soil Scientists

NOTE: You will also need lab stuff

ENV-250

A Pocket Style Manual 9th Edition

ENV-319

The Environmental Case: Translating Values Into Policy

Salzman and Thompson's Environmental Law and Policy

FAS (Fine Arts)

FAS-235Adobe Photoshop Lightroom Classic Classroom in a Book (2023 Release)

FAS-342 History of Modern Art

ALRIGHTY I'm tired, I will probably add ore later though! Good luck!

[hayheadd]

How would u represent the dogheads as warrior cats?

This is a hard one!

Now. I try to stray (bark) away from the canon of both pathologic and warrior cats as little as possible, within reason. It gets hard when pathologic's whole thing is mindfuck magic shenanigans and architecture, something that cats ... can actually do in warrior cats, they cat build to some extent and are smart. But making masks and theatre performances is something that cats usually don't do...

I have considered eeeveything to make it fit. I have considered things like the warrior cats pathologic happening like 2 km away from the actual real pathologic with the humans, I have considered the powers that be actually still being human children but they're just playing with their warriors ocs instead. Don't worry the first one is scrapped but the second... Mmmm... Anyways. It would make sense for say, Executors to have weird looking above average sized raven skulls and for Oyun to wear an actual bull skull since he's a big cat and being able to carry bones of an animal that weighs up to a ton all the time would be a testament to his strength. Tragedians though? Hm. Apparently in the lore of p1 Mark actually dug the masks up from the ground with them being relics of some sort of kin tradition, like the Executors being the birds of death. So that backs up the bull and the ravens, but what about the vaguely human mime mask? To be fair TO ME the game doesn't explain their lore either, so I can just say it stays a myyystery... But if you care, maybe the tragedian masks were something that the old cat kin made out of like, a big bone then cut holes in it. They still have the abattoir, and no, cats killing bulls isn't silly, cats canonically have GOD and they can ride trains and go to the mall (which happens in Tigerheart's and Riverstar's books, I may know my cat lore...) and also do surgery with fucking rocks

I have explained them having the polyhedron and cathedral and weapons applicable in gameplay (within reason). But dog heads are something that cats absolutely cannot make. A flower cloak, sure. A bone mask, whatever. They don't have plushies though. They can't stitch... They don't have cloth production. And I like to keep my pathologicisms recognisable. I put the outfit patterns on cat fur so you can take a look at it and definitively say, hey, that's mister Danny Dankovsky D. Diddles Dickhead right there. So making the dogheads completely unrecognisable would be very unfortunate. So after that pretty long ramble I am going to inform you that I am taking the easiest possible cop out! The heads are plushies that they have because they do. Because they have the plushies and there is not an issue. They tie it to themselves with grass for stability and there's stuffing spilling out which is very patholgicly. Here's a quick doodle on cat finch, that's the ginger kid who eats knives.

Or maybe I can use the elaborate web of cop outs that IPL have constructed for themselves. See, co-author, it makes sense because god is children and children are stupid. Actually no, this makes sense because this is a videogame! No this isn't a videogame, this is a theatre performance! Goodnight!!!

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

omg I want to know, how were the Napoleon Queer Wars of 2014 like?? 😬

oh lord lol

It's been almost ten years and I still get weird YIKES reaction in my skin when I think about it, or when people in the current Napoleonic corner act a bit like the people from back then. Which is a me issue, and not anyone else's problem. But it is why I don't really engage with anyone from the Napoleonic side of tumblr anymore - too many bad memories and bad taste in my mouth.

Essentially, someone posted the (in)famous Cronin quote re: Napoleon telling Coulaincourt about the Feelings He Gets When Looking At Someone Handsome Friend Shaped. They speculated about queer* implications of this.

--

*necessary disclaimer about modern concepts of sexuality not being applicable to the past yadda yadda yadda. I'm using short hand here, folks. No one needs to jump down my throat.

--

A bunch of the Very Serious History Blogs(tm) came down hard on them being like "you're a fool, absolutely not, Napoleon was Straight(tm)". Someone else replied being like "Well what about That Letter from N to Josie concerning a Certain Tsar of Russia?"

I forget how That Letter was explained away, but it was.

Some name calling nonsense and really aggresive replies where bandied back and forth. People were passive aggresive and mean. People ignored each other then wrote vagueing posts about it. The usual damned foolishness you would expect.

Then someone else referenced that one book whose whole thesis is basically Napoleon was Probably Bi. The book, I will say, isn't great. I'd never recommend it. But it was floating around in the 2014/15 world of Napoleonic Tumblr.

And oh man was the person who suggested it torn to shreds. Eviscerated. It was like watching a train wreck and the by standers decided to lock the doors of the train and not let the passengers off while everything burned.

There were weird spin-off dramas from this nonsense where people got into whether or not being interested in Napoleon made you a war crime sympathizer. (Some things never change on this webbed site.) Messy, messy. Also, utterly dumb.

Anyway - it ended up weirdly boiling down to two sides: Are You A Serious Historian/Take History Seriously(tm) Therefore Anti-Napoleon Possibly Being Something Like Queer Even If Never Acted On versus People Having Fun(tm) on the Internet Who Now Have Their Backs Up and Are Responding Perhaps Unwisely.

There was a third party, which I was part of at that time** (no longer, since I left academia), which was the "We Do Real History As A Day Job, Because We Are In Academia, but Lol Like Hell Would I Think to do Serious History on the Blue Hell Site. I'm Present for Shits and Giggles and Idle Speculation and Chats. Nothing Here is Serious. Everyone Needs To Calm Down and Take Themselves Way Less Seriously." We were a small contingent, to say the least.

--

**this is not to say I didn't walk away with egg on my face. Because I did. My comportment wasn't great and it's something I've been trying to be better about ever since.

It's not a time I think anyone save like four Napoleonic-interested blogs can look back on without blame.

--

But yeah - it was a real bad time on here. People were called names and cruel, cruel messages were sent to various and sundry by various and sundry. People deactivated over it. Friendships were literally torched because of it. There was a lot of issues with: "What Is Tone When Jumping On Someone's Post?? We don't know how to gauge it! Are you being mean? Are you being helpful? Who knows!! But you sounded aggresive in your add on and so I had better respond aggressively as well."

All because some people took themselves too seriously and because other people were stupidly mean about something dumb.

If I sometimes come in really strong with five million disclaimers in my napoleon asks/responses, even just the silly, purely speculative ones that no one sensible expects Real Serious History to result from - questions that clearly fall into the camp of shit a friend would ask you at the bar after four pints - things like: "was he queer? do you think he had add/adhd? what do you speculate were mental health issues he may have had?" etc. it's because of this year/year-and-a-half shit show. (And my disclaimers don't always serve their purpose because this is, after all, the Piss on the Poor website and people lack attention to detail when reading. [That said, I'm just as guilty of it as well, so can't point too many fingers.])

anyway, the long and short is that MAN people were very anti-any idea that there might have been an iota of what we would term queerness in Napoleon. And MAN no one can be normal on this site about anything so of course there was unnecessary drama and hurt feelings and bitterness.

May we never repeat this stupid time.