#weaponizing the dog in the divorce

[everykillerbee]

[heterorealism]

Check his dogs teeth. That’s the big one.

[lavernius]

Locus as a metaphor for colorism/racism

Some people were interested in this take so I'm going to go over it really quick. I am brown, a lot of the experiences I talk about here are lived (and a lot of them I experienced from this fandom, ironically enough). Warnings for discussion of racism and colorism + abuse.

Don't be weird, keep it civil! I'm not telling you what to think I'm just giving my two cents as a person who has experienced all of this.

Note: I don't think RT intentionally did any of this because they couldn't even treat their real life employees of color well so I don’t trust them with a character of color LMAO. “Colorism” is specified here because being brown affects every part of life in a way that's difficult to explain if you haven't experienced it firsthand.

Locus experiences very true aspects of real-world racial profiling: he's a big, dark-skinned, reserved brown man who is heavily demonized—both by the narrative/show AND in-universe. The fact that the “scary” merc of the duo is the one who was confirmed brown in 14 is likely colorism on RT's part, yes, but it doesn't change that Locus is painted as an aggressive monster canonically (a common stereotype of brown men, and a cause for code-switching in many POC). He's a monster, a dog, a weapon, a machine—all words that are used to describe him in the show, some he even uses on himself. Obviously not words you should be applying to a brown person good lord!

Locus’s apathy isn't inherently part of him. Maybe he wasn't always kind or gentle, but he was forced into a violent situation and TRIED to stay empathetic, wanting to spare his enemies at times, before he was forced out of the mindset—something that still bothers him to this day, even if he's repressed it! Brown people commonly have mental health issues and trauma that doesn't get addressed because of cultural expectations and medical racism, to the point where a lot of our cultures normalize very unhealthy behaviors. More of a stretch, maybe, but it reads like racial trauma if I ever saw it (and I have). Specifically because:

Felix sees him starting to lose his empathy, which is VERY BAD for Locus’s mental health, and takes advantage of it to use Locus as something of a “guard dog”. Erm, white people benefiting from racism and colorism? White people forcing stigma on brown people to gain power over them? What a surprise!

On the note of Felix: while Santa’s reveal that Felix is afraid of Locus can have several meanings, a lot of them can still lead down a road of (abusive) racism. He's scared of Locus because he's a “merciless killer”, isn't the same person he used to be? Who caused that, I wonder? Scared because if Locus found out he was being manipulated he’d immediately abandon Felix? Yeah, because he's being manipulated and abused, of course he’d leave… if I found out I was being manipulated by a white man I'd be uncomfortable too! Victim blaming is EXTREMELY common with racist white people because there is POWER in being white and blaming the brown man.

I like to see Locus’s divorce from his given name and visage as a symbol of cultural isolation. POC are so frequently made victims of identity crises because we’re expected to conform to a white world, whether we try to be white people or try to be what white people expect us to be. The latter in Locus’s case—they want a violent brown man, they have one. It keeps him alive at the cost of taking his sense of self away. He's safer as Locus, the armor, than he is as Ortez, the person.

There's not like, canonical evidence I can point to, but Locus feels like a catch-22 of “I want to be angry that people see me as a monster for being brown, but if I’m angry they’ll see me as a monster because I am brown”. It's a cycle that's hard to escape because when you ARE a righteous brown person who wants to be angry because the world has hurt you, it's so easy to paint you as an animal.

Um the fandom is extremely racist to him in ways I don't think they're even aware of. He's got it all! Fandom whitewashing and stereotyping and sexualizing and demonizing, people shipping him with a white person who hurt him (because a brown person cannot be hurt by a white person without SOMEONE wanting to forgive the white perpetrator for it LMFAO, many such cases where it’s done for the sake of shipping too), performative diversity and a lack of actual depth in his culture bar the fact that he speaks Spanish and has a Hispanic name…I don’t even think the guy who MADE him gives a shit that he’s brown (past it giving him brownie points) and how it affects him. Yeah who’s surprised. (EDIT: did not know Miles was mixed, but POC are still capable of colorism, etc. I still think Miles, as a lighter skinned person, doesn't fully comprehend how Locus being dark plays into the dynamic/Locus's character as a whole. Still, entirely my mistake.)

So basically: brown guy gets dehumanized, white guy takes advantage of it, systemic colorism and stigma helps white guy get away with it, brown guy is alienated from himself as a result and thinks he genuinely is a monster because everyone treats him like one. I see myself in him as a brown person who has experienced colorism for having low empathy and not connecting with society. It's awesome.

He is a textbook traumatized brown guy. He's got internalized racism/colorism. He's going to meet other brown people and unlearn it. He’s going to connect with his culture again. He’s going to realize he never owed the white man power over him just because he was convenient to control. He's going to be okay!

No thanks to RT because they couldn’t write a good brown guy if they tried + it falls on us brown people to give coincidences this kind of personal meaning. LOL

Next week (not really) I get into how Lopez is an incredible accidental portrayal of alienated brown people who have pride in themselves and want justice for being mistreated all the time.

[thebearme]

Got any re8 Heisenberg headcanons? (I definitely am so normal about him)

Don't worry, I'm completely normal about him too.

Ethan works with Karl to stop Miranda, but they aren't exactly friends after that, but they learn to like each other.

Chris was originally was going to put Karl into the military as a living bioweapon, but with enough convincing. Ethan got him to just let stay with him and Rose. They're roommates now.

Karl is thankful for Ethan to help him avoid that fate, but he is still frustrated on how his life is in someone's hand. Now he has to listen to Ethan or run the risk of being killed or weaponized. So the anger is the living arrangement is mutual.

Karl tends to be untrusting of everyone, like a feral stray dog. So Karl stays in the basement and minds his business.

Ethan and Mia had a mutual divorce, The relationship was built on rocky ground, and they understand that. But what Mia doesn't understand is why Ethan would have this moldy hobo live with him, and frankly- he doesn't know either.

Karl was a stinky man. His hands are rough and dry, chipped sharp nails that seem to always have something underneath them despite that fact of him wearing gloves most of the time. He covered in a layer of grease, sweat and car oil, smells like copper, gasoline, sweat, cigars, rain dew and a hint of mold and rot. LOVEY ISN'T IT! A sensory overload dream. His hair WILL make a crunchy noise if touched, and don't bother trying to comb through it.

Ethan made sure that his mf got a shower with some actual soap. He may look the same but trust in the fact if you were in a room with him, you'll actually be able to hug him without getting high from the gasoline.

Karl's hair gets so fluffy when conditioned.

It took months before Ethan trusted Karl in watching Rose or let alone hold her.

Karl LOVES sweets.

He originally didn't know about Home Depot because Ethan was worry that there will quickly be no Home Depot.

There's no longer a Home Depot.

Heisenberg will melt when he hears Rose's first words.

The day that Heisenberg finds out what a Samsung fridge is- IT'S OVER!

Heisenberg lived off of military ration meals till now, so he has to resort to the next best thing here: hungry man TV dinners. And kid cuisine when Rose goes into solid food.

HE CAN COOK! To be particular, grill. But he's kinda going through that depression that led you to not take care of himself.

Karl HATES the rain, It rusts all his metal, and he is in content risk of getting struck by lightning, He's a living lightning rod. Ethan tries to be nice and help him by giving him a rubber rain suit, leading him to wear three layers of protection: fishing overalls, rain boots, raincoat, rubber gloves, rain hat and a rubber poncho.

You can hear him from a mile away with all that rubber squeaking.

Heisenberg surprisingly was a virgin for a long time, and it makes sense. He was too busy in his factory to be with anyone romantically nor platonically, let alone get laid. He never really cared till he thought about it now, especially when Ethan has living proof that he fucked. *CUT TO FUNNY KARL SPEED DATING SEQUENCE* this is probably a very sharp contrast to others hc of karl but idc it's my hc

Heisenberg and Ethan have that opposite attract dynamic, Karl gets to teach him that life doesn't end or need to be tense just because they're mole zombies. While Ethan teaches Karl to unpack his years trauma, cuz that shit will come to haunt you.

Ethan found some room for Heisenberg to sleep upstairs instead.

Eventually Ethan gets so close with Heisenberg he actually starts calling him by his first name.

That was noticed by Mia and Chris, which made them nervous in where Ethan loyalty would lie when something were to happen.

Heisenberg never had clean water before, so just imagine him with the crisp 3am water.

Chris only allows Karl to experience the outside monthly. But Ethan sneaks Karl with him when he can. As long, he doesn't scare anyone in town.

Karl is like a caveman entering the present day, He's culture shock is out of this world.

He loves the phrase "metal as fuck."

When Karl has a nightmare he rearrange his room to push all the metal out or nap in the living room. When Karl and Ethan got closer he started sleeping in Ethan's room. Even though their hearts beat slow, the human warmth is still there.

Karl never wants to talk about what his nightmare was about or why he feels better sleeping in a room with less metal.

Here some songs that I always relate to Heisenberg:

Now I'm about to go into what my hc is for Heisenberg before re8.

tw body horror and child abuse

I have the headcanon that Karl wasn't from the village, but his family was. He was born in the states and unknowingly has the genes that make him very susceptible to the mold mutation. Eventually, after his grandfather died and passed the factory/mines to his parents, they all moved to Europe. Explaining the contrasting transatlantic accent.

But like all things, Miranda had to ruin. She noticed the newcomers of the village; she saw how they also have a child and decided to take action. Miranda killed Karl Heisenberg's parents and took him in to experiment on with the cadou parasite.

His gift was unknown till one check up later after all of his complaints of feeling of something tearing into him. Miranda realized that there seems to be scraps of metal like nuts and bolts dug and tear through into his body to his bones like a magnet.

When he's in is REM sleep, his electromagnet powers moves and attract scraps of metal to him. Leaving him to wake up with blood on his sheets, but the wound already healed like nothing happened. But Karl does know it feels harder to move every day.

Miranda made sure to test him on his gift. He looks completely human and is powerful, he was almost perfect… The one single flaw in him is the fact that even as a helpless child that had no one else to rely on but her. He still hated her.

Heisenberg was the youngest of the four lords and the favorite, and he hated it. Dude would just spend all his time by himself, leaving himself tape recorders. He eventually started to entertain himself as if he was a radio host. The theater kid possesses him.

Eventually when he got older he got into contact with The Duke and was able to purchase tapes and machinery scraps from him. The tapes turned out to be American documents of ww2, leading Heisenberg to his American freedom fighter rhetoric.

When he detransform from his big monster form, he has to go get a lil help. He has to get rid of the pieces of metal without just tearing off pieces of his flesh, That shit is hard to grow back you know!

[fitzs-space]

I want to talk about all the details I put into the Ties comic cause I worked on that thing for like a week and my brain likes to think about many things

Anyway, pspspsps I'm info dumping about my own designs gather round.

Notes for the character designs themselves

-The colours show if they are Red/Yellow/Green are different per character. Tango with bright colours, Skizz's are cool and dark, Impulses are more yellow, and Ethos are more desaturated. -Not all characters in the Life Games will get colour indicators in their eyes, the fact 3/4 of the designs here have it is unimportant shut -Impulse has a heart knot in his tie!! Look at it!! -Impulse cannot tie a tie. Tango does it for him. -Tango having his tie undone is his own choice -The choice of them having/not having pupils is intentional. -Etho only has the one on one side, maybe its cause the red eyes a little fucky in the vision, who knows though -Impulse has i's in the eyes -Skizz just straight up doesn't have em, but I normally don't draw pupils with that iris shape anyway. something something normally only draw that iris style with certain magical characters -I just stopped drawing with Tango with iris' at some point, idk -Skizz is designed as a fallen angel. that's why the halo's are all separated/broken, and why you can see darker feathers growing -maybe Impulse used to help him dye them white cause of some insecurity, maybe not -the lower his lives go, the less dark feathers are seen in his wings. like a cruel joke the watchers get a kick out of

-mullet Skizz MULLET SKIZZ!!!!!

-Etho is a sentimental mf /pos. they will keep and make a lot of patches for memory's and stuff. notable patches are, The NHO patch, a creeper cause of general Spazz, Canada flag cause Canadian /j, I normally add rainbow ones for the button saga of s7 but forgot to this time. -the rings are from all their divorces /J -the colours on the rings correlate to their owners (Bdubs, Cleo, Joel) lives. ie will be red if one of them is red kinda thing.

think that's the most of the design thoughts, now the Details in the comic itself,,,

-Skizz is the kinda mf who would fiddle//stim with random things in his hands. Many times its other peoples hands -dude will just hold peoples hands randomly when talking to them, team Ties just got used to it -That's why Etho took so long to notice the bracelet!

-their ass isn't phased by this kinda stuff anymore /hj -Skizz just enjoys contact man let me be -Throughout most of the comic Skizz has some sort of contact with Etho

-Tango and impulse also end up giving Etho bracelets as well -All the bracelets Etho gets share their colour indicator + the colour form the person who made it!

-you can see the colours slowly shift when Skizz ties on the bracelet, something something the magic of the world does some shit sometimes man.

-Skizz taught Impulse how to make the bracelets, so they have similar styles, Skizz's is more of a simple braid style though. -Tango went for something that took longer to do. it is a little scuffed /pos

-Ethos been getting their ass handed to them the episode before this, had to rightfully reflect that. you know? /j -the Slashes across their chest where form when Gem/Cleo killed them twice in that one episode. -The bite was originally supposed to be cause of Scars dogs. But someone in a reply made a joke about it, and frankly I think it'd be funnier if it was cause of Joel or some shit like they said.

-Had the axe as more of a battle-axe style. It was something Impulse made for Skizz (I forget who actually made it//Didn't want to go back to check) -I like showing characters having specific styles/ways they make armor and tools. -It's fun to show characters with tools and armor that can be distinctly seen as being made by another player

-That being an axe Impulse made adds more weight to the narrative of this moment and I want people to cry -something something for Etho its a moment of taking a weapon that Impulse made to protect Skizz, and using that as the tool that finally kills him -For Skizz this is a moment of his trust and care for his teammates. Being surrounded by people that he cares about and tokens that show their love for each other.

-Suffer, I could have been angstyier, and I will be actualy.

-Skizz is the one putting the axe to his own neck in this moment. Etho is putting as little force into it as they can. -Red king parallels who- -Etho also gets cut by the axe, something about sacrifice and how no life/time can truly be free in these life games -The blood wasn't actually intended to be golden ichor, I was just lazy and didn't want to draw red blood// wanted to have the cool lighting effect -Etho has the same colour in their blood too so, take it as you will

-I've had this comic planed since EPICODE ONE. had full intentions for it to go angsty in the end, and dam if the narrative didn't play right into my grubby little hands.

-I also just love how well I could parallel the moments in this comic. the comparison of the pages where both their faces are visible? the Joy in ethos face turning to complete anguish? the fact Skizz never stopped smiling? the way both moments start with an outstretched hand, and end with Skizz still holding onto Etho in a moment of trust? beautiful

-all the pages in the second part of the comic were framed specifically so I could avoid drawing Skizz ass.

[phoenixyfriend]

We keep discussing fem!Sanji in the groupchat, courtesy of @professorsparklepants, and so I presented her with this concept:

Context: AU, possibly modern, where Sanji is technically still in contact with the Vinsmokes but moved out with mom when she divorced and then remarried to Zeff and only sees the paternal side of the family for like. Weddings and the occasional new year's eve

(This could, in theory, be a fem!Sanji AU. Could even be a Zoro/fem!Sanji. But it could also just be regular Sanji and Insert Random Crew member. I err on the side of Zoro or Nami, or both.)

But this is the conversation that needs to happen, with the 'reasonable' requester being Sanji:

(Tiktoks still can't be successfully embedded in tumblr posts but this is the source, and this is the tumblr post I originally saw it on.)

Obvious thought is Zoro because of the sword, but it could easily be Nami with the end bit.*

And as Prof herself responded:

Nami AND Zoro. Sanji has two hands and now no longer has to sit next to any family members. The swag of showing up to your divorced father's house with your bisexual fake polycule. Sanji, watching the music video for Rina Sawayama's This Hell: I could do that

Nami shows up with a slutty outfit and outrageous stories, Zoro shows up with weapons he has to check at the door and a ludicrously high alcohol tolerance.

They both have ludicrously high tolerances, but Zoro's the one that collects empty bottles at his seat to cause drama.

I think Nami has to hit on some of Sanji's brothers. Zoro should also hit on some of Sanji's brothers. Possibly their dad. Just to fuck with them a bit more.

Nami takes turns sitting on Zoro and Sanji's laps and being all giggly, pretending to be just a little tipsier than she actually is, just to see the offense at being Improper, and also the Jealousy from everyone who Wants Her, but instead she's with The Disappointment and the guy that said disappointmend must have found under a bridge or in prison or something.

* Unfortunately, the rest are out for various reasons: Luffy and Brook and Franky can't be purposeful enough, Usopp and Chopper would have difficulty with being intimidated by the Vinsmokes, and Jinbei is not meant for this purpose. I Loev Robin but she's the wrong call for this one: not as Fabulous about it as Nami, not as rude as Zoro. A bit less "let me tell you about this time I stole a guy's dog" and a bit more "let me tell you about this dead body I found." She's more likely to scare people than piss them off, and in this scenario, Sanji wants them pissed off.

[dreamsontheirway]

Cynophobia | S.R.

Summary: the reader has cynophobia, the fear of dogs, and spencer is there for her. Warnings: fears? Word Count: 0.9k

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"What's your biggest fear?"

You recalled asking Spencer the question several months ago, while the two of you were curled up on his couch. The two of you had enjoyed a typical weekday night; the dishes from dinner were running in the dishwasher and the show you were binging played softly in the background.

Spencer hummed, brows furrowed as he considered your question.

"I know it sounds silly, but probably losing something or someone I love," he said, a small smile playing at his lips. "I guess my biggest fear is losing you."

You smiled at him, and rubbed your hand along the stubble on his jawline. You reached up and placed a soft kiss where your hand had been.

"You're so cheesy."

"What's yours?" Spencer asked, peering down at you through hooded eyelids, his long lashes on display.

"You'll laugh at me."

Spencer's brow furrowed, his mouth opening before lifting up slightly.

"I won't laugh at you."

"I'm afraid of dogs," you admitted, shying away from him in embarrassment.

"I had to get stitches as a kid because I got bit by our neighbor's rottweiler. Ever since then," you trailed off, shivering at the memory.

Spencer's brow furrowed at the idea, and he rubbed your goosebump-covered arms.

"Cynophobia," Spencer stated, and despite your reddening cheeks, he only looked at you with adoration.

-----

It was an average, summer day in Virginia, and the team had just been assigned a case. It was a hostage situation; the unsub had several people trapped inside of a bank. Fortunately, his only weapon was a knife. In theory, it should be easier to get him into custody without the possession of an automatic weapon.

You, along with Spencer and Emily, were driving in one of the BAU's black vans. Spencer drove, with you in the passenger's seat, and Emily in the back reading through the case files.

"His name is Edward Fisher," Emily stated, her eyes skimming the paper. "He's twenty-seven, no priors, but it looks like he was recently divorced."

"I'm sure that's the stressor," Spencer offered, his eyes squinting as he drove.

Upon your arrival at the bank, you were met by the rest of the team standing alongside some local officers. You and the others were beginning to craft your plan of action, when another van pulled up.

Another group of local police exited the van, and what followed them shook you significantly. Three large dogs exited the van with the K-9 officers, two German Shepherds and, much to your dismay, a large rottweiler.

You would have been able to compose yourself if it wasn't for the fact that one of the dogs got loose and began running towards the team. Of course, the dog was trained, so it merely sniffed around on the ground, but you immediately backed up in fear.

You backed up straight into the strong chest of your boyfriend. Your eyes were wide, frantic, and your breathing began to pick up rapidly. You felt hands grip your shoulders - Spencer - as he pushed you behind him.

As observant as he was, Spencer had immediately noticed the dog that was set loose. He remembered your fear despite talking about it months ago and protectively stepped in front of you, hollering towards the officers, who were approaching in order to retrieve their dog.

"Hey! I thought these dogs were supposed to be trained, keep a hold on them, would you?!"

The officer nearest to you mumbled an apology, giving Spencer an odd look, and pulled the dog back towards their group of K-9 officers. You let out a large breath that you hadn't realized you were holding, and relaxed against Spencer.

He turned to you then, his eyes wide in concern and anger.

"Are you okay?" He asked you, and his thumb wiped under your eyes. No tears had actually fallen, but Spencer noticed the wetness that began to pool, both from fear and relief.

"Yes, thank you," you spoke and let out another shaky breath.

"You're really scared of dogs, pretty girl?" Morgan chimed in, smirking at you.

You could feel the arms that were wrapped around you tense.

"Morgan," Spencer gave him a stern glare, warning him not to continue with his jokes. Derek's hands went up in joking surrender, despite Spencer's seriousness.

"Y/L/N, go back to the van. Reid, you go with her. Catch your breath," Hotch ordered, and nodded towards the vehicle near you.

Spencer wrapped his arm around your shoulders and guided you to lean against the door of the van. He leaned next to you, wrapping his hand in yours.

"So you remembered," you started, a hint of embarrassment in your tone.

"Of course I did," Spencer joked, hinting towards his eidetic memory. "Don't be embarrassed, love."

"I can't help it! I'm an adult woman who just cried at the sight of a dog."

Spencer's face appeared in front of you then, his brown eyes trained on yours. He leaned his forehead against yours and planted a sweet kiss on the tip of your nose.

"It's okay to have fears," he cooed, and leaned in to place a chaste kiss on your lips, which were pouting.

"The whole team saw that, Spence. It was mortifying."

"If they say anything about it, they'll have to deal with me."

You smirked at him, admiring your tall, lanky boyfriend. You knew he couldn't hurt a fly, unless he absolutely had to, which made his statement all the more amusing.

"Don't give me that look, I'm serious," Spencer gawked at you, incredulous.

"Sure, sure,” you waved your hand at him, giggling. You gave him a peck on the lips before continuing.

“Whatever you say.”

-----

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CM Taglist: @cynbx @random000000 @lockwoods-coat-and-reids-vests @miralgr @xoyouronlyamorrxo

[gmanwhore]

I want to hear your random headcanons of every nightmare resident

Because I just love nightmare mode

Ok ok I'm gonna go through. And give them their role in the hierarchy, their alignment (Death, War, Pestilence, Famine), and a random headcanon. I have more headcanons for certain characters but :3 Also alignment is just. Which Horseman they align with and which values they follow related to each idea. Yeah. If you want I can go into more detail but yeah.

Also also. The hierarchy goes Horseman -> Consort -> Ritual Performers (including the guy who provides sacrifices) -> Common Nightmare

Also another general headcanon! All romantic/familial relationships are the same :3

Xesbet:

Role: Common Nightmare

Alignment: War/Famine

Random headcanon: Xesbet is actually a lot like his human counterpart, a fairly chill guy who just wants to do his job. He just has a resting smile now instead of a resting frown.

Drugia:

Role: Common Nightmare

Alignment: Pestilence

Headcanon: Drugia can actually like. Make arms for the hands on her head. Also she's almost entirely blind, despite the number of eyes she has.

Exael:

Role: Common Nightmare

Alignment: War

Headcanon: He is incredibly methodical with his torture, and is very professional about everything. He's genuinely not into this, guys.

Barbatos:

Role: Ritual Performer

Alignment: Death/War

Headcanon: He strikes such fear into mortals he can simply open a sack and tell someone to get in. And they will just do that. Also, like his brother he is not a bad guy he's just chill.

Abducius:

Role: Common Nightmare (used to be a Ritual Performer)

Alignment: War/Death

Headcanon: He does get off of torturing people.

Lilith:

Role: Ritual Performer

Alignment: Famine/Pestilence

Headcanon: I don't CARE she is Nightmare Selenne to ME. Also she provides potions for rituals and is basically in charge of outside supplies. Also also she's dating both Famine and Pestilence so like.

Anazareth:

Role: Ritual Performer

Alignment: Famine

Headcanon: She is the man reason they have like. Half their Common Nightmares. Specifically Barbatos, Exael, Izanami, Abducius, and Nyogtha. She also just kind of does that when she gets pissed off.

Chaugnar:

Role: Ritual Performer

Alignment: Famine/Death

Headcanon: He is a perfectionist. He's not rude but he will passive agressively rearrange whatever was done wrong and be like "oh no it's fine don't mind me"

Nyogtha:

Role: Common Nightmare

Alignment: Death

Headcanon: She is worms baybayyyyyyyyyy like she is just a bundle of sentient worms. She's just piloting a rotting flesh mech.

Zoth:

Role: Ritual Performer

Alignment: Famine/Death

Headcanon: He is out preparing their ritual grounds almost constantly because plants grow very fast, but he doesn't mind and he enjoys his job.

Shub:

Role: Horseman of Famine

Alignment: Famine

Headcanon: Her symbols are snakes, dogs, and apples. Her season is Summer, and her festival is a huge feast! Her weapons are a Bear trap, and a morning star. She also has a garden for herself and spends a lot of time there. She's also one of the two Horsemen who are also technically elder gods because she is OLD and has never passed her title on.

Yog:

Role: Common Nightmare (former Consort)

Alignment: Famine/Pestilence

Headcanon: He genuinely doesn't care about anyone. He's always on the damn tome. He goes out very rarely.

Quachil:

Role: Consort

Alignment: Pestilence

Headcanon: PUT THIS GIRL BACK WITH HER MOM NOOWWWWWWWW she is a mama's girl she has to live with her dad because Yan Luo was salty at Ishtar for getting divorced. Quachil acts like she doesn't care but she HATES it here. She was also cast out of Heaven as a baby.

Yan Luo:

Role: Princess/Horseman of Death

Alignment: Death

Headcanon: She is from a long lineage, but she's the first woman like. Ever. Her symbols are dragons and skulls, her season is winter, and her weapon is a scythe (she can't use it). She is also the youngest of the Horsemen, and the least experienced. Her thing is a week long funeral, and during the winter she slips into a depression for. The whole season.

Orcus:

Role: Consort

Alignment: Death

Headcanon: He likes his wife :D

Ishtar:

Role: Horseman of Pestilence

Alignment: Pestilence

Headcanon: Ishtar's symbols are rats and locusts. Her season is Spring, and her weapon is a sword that she can grow vines up to STAB people. Her festival is. I shan't say. She is as old as Shub. Yeah ok she's a fertility goddess and is the only one who's festival doesn't include a sacrifice. She's also the kind of lady who will see a child and ask "is anyone gonna adopt this" and not wait for an answer.

Teutates:

Role: Horseman of War

Alignment: War

Headcanon: Teutates' season is Fall, and his symbols are horses and wolves. His formal weapon is a cudgel, but when he's just out and about he uses a baseball bat covered in barbed wire. His thing is a giant tournament where humans have to fight each other, than Teutates kills the winner. He is the only person who is chill with dopplegangers apparently, he likes keeping them as pets.

Ah Puch:

Role: Common Nightmare (formerly Horseman of War)

Alignment: War

Headcanon: He really needs a break, that's why he retired. He's mostly just annoying now.

Dagda:

Role: Common Nightmare

Alignment: Death

Headcanon: Dagda was sewn together by Yan Luo, and Xesbet put a soul in him. He sees Yan Luo as a mother but she doesn't like him. He is literally just a silly idk what to say.

Izanami:

Role: Common Nightmare

Alignment: War/Pestilence

Headcanon: You would think she's like. Quiet and sneaky but her ass is NOT she's very agressive and quick to anger.

[bellatheinkdemon]

Stuff from the first episode of The Last Cookie Standing I found neat

Tea Knight's hair is tied up with a tea bag. I mean, it's obvious why it's a tea bag, but still.

He is such a dog dad

Licorice looks so weird without his weapon

The Last Cookie Standing shows us some new sprites like this one. I wonder if they're ever gonna be public

Espresseleine divorce arc real

(Also this reminds me of a song, but I can't remember its name. Childish war or something? Idk.)

"*Disclaimer* This production does not support Dark Enchantress Cookie."

If you don't support it, then why do you have not one, not two, but THREE MEMBERS OF COD ON THIS SHOW?! (Four if we're counting Strawberry Crepe. I'm still confused if they're still a member or not.)

Welp, Chiffon is definitely dead. Though out of all the members of CoD, Poison Mushroom is probably the safest option for pet-sitting.

[hazardtoons]

Did a bit of a poster for the upcoming tournament over at @tf2shipswag ! I hope she gets in and I hope she gets far.

The Therapist’s job is to provide help and therapy to the mercs to help them work healthy. However, she can be vicious and merciless, using the sensitive information she’s given as a weapon. Perhaps she doesn’t have their best interests in mind…?

She is also…

Trans gender

divorced (in canon!)

failgirl

mean as fuck

fucked scout’s ma while also giving him therapy about it

pretended to be religious to hit on the priest in a confession booth and it worked

Muscular

disabled (shes blind)

owns a cute dog

If that helps?

[iravaid]

sry if this is random but will u tell us what english au is? i remember seeing it passing re: codposting and im so curious

Hi i'm so happy you asked

English AU came about when me and @farramint started bonding over how much we hated the comics and talked about how things might look if Roba was more competent.

English AU sprouts from the concept of what would happen if Simon let the brainwashing 'work' and started complying with Roba, to an extent, as his personal attack dog. Both as a way to get the torture to stop (so he would be healthy enough in the future to escape on his own, when the opportunity arose), and to stall Roba getting bored with Simon and killing him (as, in this AU, Roba had Sparks killed, leading Simon to realise his time is limited here, and dependent on that sadist's interest in him).

It's also a fun, morbid enough exploration on how low Simon will be forced to stoop while 'working' for Roba (murder, torture and such, yknow how it is), as well as the harassment, humiliation, and torture (of all kinds) he'd have to tolerate within the Zaragoza cartel. Things like forcefully being tattooed, mocked for the sexual assault and torture he'd been subjected to, and being referred to by 'English' as opposed to his actual name. I can see Roba subtly holding Simon's family hostage (to where they don't know they're in danger), and making sure Simon knows that any step too far out of line will lead to their harm. Gripped by the idea that the first time Simon hears his brother's, or mother's, voice in months is a conversation secretly recorded between one of them, and someone Roba had planted in Manchester in order to keep tabs on them.

It also lead to the idea of Roba, in all his arrogance, seeing a weakness in Las Almas following the upheaval within the cartel causing El Sin Nombre to rise to prominence. And this spurs him to try and expand operations. One thing leads to another, and Valeria convinces 'English' to help her against Roba, in exchange for his own freedom. Roba eventually dies, Valeria and Simon are violent girlbosses in arms, and Simon is coping sooo well after the torture nexus that he's just going to brutally hunt down the remaining Zaragoza cartel lieutenants while in this tenuous alliance with El Sin Nombre, who is also unsure how much to trust this man, as well as unsure if she wants to even let him go - Simon is very good at what he does, and in all honesty he knows too much about her identity. Also extremely to draw parallels between Valeria and Rudy, but if people want to read about that lmk because that's a separate post entirely.

And it makes sense for the 141 to eventually appear, maybe somewhat faithful to the plot of MW2, with the missiles and such <3. Except now there's some ulterior motives from Price, who might be aware of the MIA SAS serviceman who got tangled up in rumours of corruption and cartels. Leading to him trying to find Simon Riley and bring him back home with this sense of duty/honour to uphold, in the wake of higher-ups failing this man.

Simon then going from one master (Roba) to another (Valeria) to another (Price) is very fun to consider, as well. Valeria giving Simon more independence than Roba ever did, with shreds of respect to stop him from rankling under her thumb as badly (but still keeping Control, at the end of the day). Price is very much a man who knows how to utilise the men under him as Weapons, and while he respects his subordinates as people (versus Roba seeing Simon as a convenient attack dog he used to make kneel naked, arms behind his back, in a wire kennel for hours on end), Price ultimately values them by their individual abilities to keep the 'bad guys' afraid of their own shadows, and to 'save' the world.

This au has everything. Alejandro-Valeria bitter divorce, competent Roba horrors, Graves is there for some reason (he explodes in the tank again), Simon slaughter hashtag girl momen with a cunty silk buttonup a (with the buzzcut no less)(and houndcoding)(and corruption. but how much is merely just building off his sas conditioning), Price's vague sense of corruption but 'for the greater good', Soap and Gaz's horror at Simon's situation in a 'this very easily could've been us' way, and Gaz gets thrown out of another helicopter.

augh this became long, i hope it makes sense. The idea is ultimately that simon gets to go home, too, and tries to readjust to a 'normal' life, reuniting with Tommy and Sharon and Beth and Joseph. But I can see Price convincing him to return to the service (he knows a lifer when he sees one, and why waste a good soldier), potentially as a private contractor with the 141.

[thesilliestrovingalive]

Updated: September 26, 2024

Reworked Character #7: Ralf Jones

POTENTIAL TRIGGER WARNING: Viewer discretion is advised due to references to divorce, death, and crime.

Real name: Rafael Paul Jonesbury

Esper title: Avatar of Flaming, Renewal, Controlling Quietus, and Physical Destruction

Alias: One-Man Army and Marauding Lupine Carnivore

Occupation: Colonel of the Ikari Warriors

Retirement plans: Open a boxing gym and experience all thrill-seeking activities that society has to offer

Special skills: Driving military vehicles, close quarters combat, orchestrating stress relief programs, proficiency in all weapons, and mercenary work

Esper abilities: His go-to esper ability is the Vulcan Punch, a rapid-fire series of punches capable of obliterating everything from humans, riot shields, bulletproof armour and glass, cars, all known slugs, small to medium-sized tanks, and smaller helicopters. Despite his belly being constantly bloody and inflamed, he experiences surprisingly little pain due to his exceptional pain suppression, increased blood vessel density, resistance to extreme temperatures, and rapidly regenerating organs. This unique combination, coupled with a secondary esophagus lined with razor-sharp, spiky hairs, enables Ralf to harness the inflammation and blood to vomit a controlled stream of scorching, burning red liquid that incinerates his enemies. The sole drawback of his perpetually bloody and inflamed belly is impaired digestion, leading to difficulties in processing food, which in turn causes persistent vomiting and diarrhea.

The skin on his torso, arms, and legs can harden into diamond-hard scales, providing impenetrable protection against bullets, blades, small bombs, and weaker cannon blasts. He can move at incredible velocities, effectively achieving infinite speed, allowing him to move indefinitely while time appears to stand still around him. Ralf can manifest up to twenty invisible arms composed of solidified telekinetic energy, which can be utilised to move around easily as well as bludgeon and slice through people and objects with precision. These arms appear to be malnourished and exhibit constant, erratic movements, reaching up to 20' 5" (622.5 cm) in length. He possesses the hearing and smell of a dog as well as the ability to manipulate red and orange flames. He can also induce explosive blasts with his punches or a mere touch of any of his fingers.

He has the ability to split his arms into six parts, exposing his coppery muscles and a gaping, organic muzzle that fires ten tentacles with sea lamprey-like mouths. These tentacles can insert themselves into the spine or brain of deceased enemies, injecting a black, tar-like substance to reanimate them. In the process, they augment their physical strength and render them obedient to Ralf's commands. Whenever Ralf is killed, his body rapidly transforms into a cocoon adorned with serrated shell plates, as his corpse dissolves into a mushy, visceral substance. This cocoon then violently pulsates before rupturing, giving birth to a new, fully formed Ralf, covered in bloodied slime and emerging stark naked, with no visible injuries or scars on his body. Whenever this occurs, he experiences temporary blindness, dizziness, and intense, bitter coldness.

Hobbies: Baseball, participating in the biennial fighting tournaments that the Ikari Warriors host, taking his friends to carnival rides, camping trips, and science and art museums, rewatching his favourite anime movies and shows, and playing arcade games and iconic riffs on the electric guitar

Likes: A medal awarded from the President of the United States, the natural sounds of the jungle, collecting blades that look cool in his eyes, alebrije sculptures, and Clark

Dislikes: False rumours, poisonous snakes (he almost got bitten by one during a past mission), abuse of power, children being killed, and people hurting and insulting those he considers as “family”

Favourite food: Intestinal sausages and bubblegum that taste like watermelon and blueberry

Favourite drink: Root beer floats

Sexuality: Biromantic asexual

Gender: Male

Age: 25 (in 2022), 31 (in 2028), 33 (in 2030), 35 (in 2032), 37 (in 2034), 44 (in 2041), 46 (in 2043), 47 (in 2044), and 50 (in 2047)

Blood type: A+

Weight: 243 lbs. (110 kg)

Design: He's a 6' 2" (187.96 cm) American mesomorph of Latino, Ojibwe, and British descent with a robust build, decently chiselled musculature, broad shoulders, and a bit of a beer belly. He has almond skin, sunburst amber-sage green eyes, sharp claws, bear-like teeth, and six fingers on his left hand. He has slightly messy ash brown hair with wispy bangs, which he often ties into a braid that falls to the middle of his back. On his left deltoid, he has a tattoo of a stylized red otter playfully escaping the jaws of a black-furred wolf with piercing yellow eyes, clutching a ball of purple fire in its forepaws. On his right forearm, he has a tattoo of an alebrije with undulating cerulean horns, an orchid-purple eagle head, languid lavender eyes with aquamarine pupils, a fiery mane, a forest-green elk body, and a hot pink salmon tail with red-orange tiger stripes. Sprawled across the right side of the creature in a vertical line is a Spanish phrase in silver: "La sangre nos fortalece", which translates to "Blood strengthens us" in English.

Ralf's military gear consists of a chrome orange bandana with shaky rifle green spots and cinnabar fingerless driving gloves with four ivory spikes on the knuckles. He wears a waterproof dark green vest with the Ikari Warriors logo emblazoned on the back, a coyote-fur trimmed collar, and two concealed strapped compartments, each capable of holding up to two firearms. However, one of the compartments often houses a sheathed Zantetsu sword instead. He wears cargo pants with an army green, brown, and silver-grey camouflage pattern, which aren't tucked into his beige jungle boots. He wears a grimy asparagus-hued sleeveless shirt paired with a yellowish-tan belt featuring four black pouches for bullets and a holster for his handgun.

Attached to his belt are two blades: Harpe, a khopesh-like sickle sword with a flint-encased adamant blade, and Yawarakai-Te, a double-edged katana featuring a green-grey hilt and a hardwood sheath adorned with iridescent crow feathers. When the air gently blows past Yawarakai-Te's blade, it produces a soft hissing sound. Yawarakai-Te's blade is unnaturally frigid, able to cut a leaf in half with ease, and compels its user to spare the innocent and undeserving from attack. Ralf dons a cardinal red waist pack that holds two cans of root beer as well as black elbow and knee pads. He also wears a black drop leg sheath for his combat knife, which features two pointed silvery stripes that form a triangular pattern.

Over his shirt, he dons a Soldier Plate Carrier System (SPCS) with a MultiCam pattern, which carries around his walkie-talkie and ammo for other firearms. Above his belt, he has a dark brown bandolier for holding sticks of dynamite. Ralf carries around a yellowish-tan load-bearing backpack that contains camping equipment, tactical explosives, portable ammo boxes, a canteen full of water, a bazooka, maps for all continents, an extra pair of clothes, and a bag of THC-infused box gummies in light orange (mango peach), red (strawberry), and pale yellow (pineapple). His backpack also contains a faded photograph of a younger him and Clark, an army Medal of Honor, a silver milagro charm in the shape of a fiery heart for good luck and protection, an empty spotted turtle shell, and a dreamcatcher adorned with a grey web design, song sparrow feathers, and colourful beads in red, white, yellow, and black.

He occasionally brings his copper-hued electric guitar and goldenrod-coloured pick holder, containing a rainbow of guitar picks (he jokingly says that he dislikes the purple one the most), on deployments and during downtime in the field. He wears hook earrings, each featuring three porcupine quills tipped with gaspeite beads, and a Jocla necklace made of alternating white wampum beads, copper beads, and raven feathers.

Thanks to Tarma, he owns a key to access his red-violet Matchless G3/L motorcycle, which has a purplish-black sheen. The gas tank features a sky blue fish scale pattern with malachite green dots at the centre of each scale.

Super Devil form: He's a 15' 7" (474.98 cm) draconic entity with a grotesque musculature and scaly, iridescent rifle green skin. He has a cerulean coyote-shaped head with sunburst amber-sage green eyes, a cardinal red nose, and a wispy silver-grey goat's beard. Ralf also has horse ears, an orchid-purple snout, two rows of olivine shark teeth, and a slimy, pointed tongue. His arms and legs are covered in ash brown otter fur, featuring six fingers and razor-sharp copper claws. He has eagle-like feet with copper talons, a fiery mane, and the upper skeletal body of an antlerless elk partially emerging from his back.

This skeletal elk body features otter-like teeth, an aquamarine forked tongue, and glowing goldenrod eyes. It’s covered in a layer of translucent flesh stitched to his back with forest green sinew. A hot pink salmon tail with red-orange tiger stripes lies flat on his back, attached to both the skeletal body and the muscle fibres, veins, and flesh of his back. The tail is slightly less than half the length of his actual tail and appears to flutter lightly every now and then.

Three rows of symmetrical, deadly sharp, conical spikes are positioned on his back, running from the base of his neck to just before the start of his tail. He has two massive bat-like wings, boasting an impressive wingspan of 21 ft (640.08 cm). Despite being dull and tattered, the wings' membrane displays silvery spots and a striking gradient from grenadier red to flush orange to selective yellow. Additionally, Ralf has olivine thumbs tipped with copper claws, and his forearms, wrists, and five fingers are dark green. He has a long, winding, serpentine tail that's twice his height, boasting distinctive coloration and markings reminiscent of a pickerel frog, and culminating in a silver arrowhead-shaped tip.

Personality: He's a rowdy, outgoing, stubborn, and honest individual with a strong passion for action and thrill-seeking ventures. However, he also values his leisure time and ensures others take regular breaks to rest and recharge. He strives to maintain an optimistic outlook and is frustrated by pessimism and cynicism, wishing others could focus on the positive and appreciate life's blessings. After forming a new connection, he rapidly becomes emotionally invested and starts to regard the person as a close family member. He's extremely protective towards new recruits under his command, comrades, and friends, viewing them as family. Ralf is willing to go to great lengths to ensure their safety and the security of innocent lives, even if it requires taking bold action or putting himself in harm's way. However, he harbours a deep-seated hatred for betrayal, particularly among those in the Regular Army or whom he considers family.

He often enjoys teasing Clark, playfully poking fun at his serious nature while showing him brotherly affection, but also treats him with great respect and compassion. The thought of potentially losing his brother-in-arms, Clark, through unfair circumstances is unbearable to him. He secretly resents being scolded for harmless fun, but Clark's disappointment stings the most, filling him with remorse. He deeply cares about children, recognizing their importance to the growth and future of humanity, and is appalled by those who abuse and harm them. The thought of inadvertently causing harm to a child or being forced to do so is utterly devastating to him.

Similar to Marco, he has a habit of concealing his deepest emotions, particularly those related to the many people he has lost during countless wars and terrorist attacks. Instead, he often tries to drown his sorrows with a few drinks, seeks comfort in the company of friends, or indulges in reckless activities. Whenever he gets drunk, he exhibits forgetfulness, clumsiness, mild paranoia, excessive joviality, and loquaciousness. He has a habit of frequently mistaking people's names, often using similar but incorrect variations (e.g. calling Marco "Mark" and Fio "Fia"), which greatly embarrasses him, prompting him to profusely apologise for the mistake. Ralf is truly fascinated by Hyakutaro, drawn to his enigmatic origins and historic status as the first esper ever known to humanity. He tries his best to avoid water activities like cruising and canoeing as they make him prone to seasickness. He finds Tarma and Nadia to be absolutely hilarious and has a soft spot for Trevor's nerdy and laid-back demeanour.

He believes that immortality is unattainable for espers and humans, reserved for the psyche and most powerful deities. He's an animist who believes everything is interconnected, and everyone has a vital role in stewarding the earth. He's a devout believer in manitou, which represents the mysterious power of life and the universe. Surprisingly, Ralf is a skilled storyteller, often recounting his past experiences and sharing entertaining moral stories his father once shared with him. Although he's a fun-loving, hot-headed enthusiast of arcades and classic anime with a great sense of humour, he possesses remarkable wisdom and generosity. He's not fond of the false rumours that surround the goings-on of the world and his personal life. He closely holds onto the values his mother taught him, including independence, loyalty, dignity, self-respect, healthy pride, and respect for elders and authority figures.

Backstory: Rafael Paul Jonesbury was born on August 25, 1997 in the Midwest, United States. His father, Gabriel Jonesbury, was an Ojibwe shaman and owner of an arts and crafts shop with a spirit name of Kechewaishke. His mother, Javiera, was a British-Latina mercenary who served in the Regular Army. Like Ralf, she was an esper with the esteemed title of the Avatar of Physical Decay, Luminosity, and Fogginess. Gabriel would often share moral and entertaining stories that connected various figures from Ojibwe spiritual beliefs, such as the Thunderbird, Great Serpent, Mishipeshu, and Nanabozo. He also taught him about other important beliefs valued among First Nations peoples, including the Grandfather Teachings and the Medicine Wheel. He sparked Ralf's love for nature and encouraged him to fearlessly explore his identity and interests.

Javiera taught him numerous Latinx cultural values, the importance of family, and how his faith in God would be greatly rewarded. She often crafted wooden alebrije sculptures for him when she was away from home. She usually encouraged him to be proud of his cultural heritage and not let others bring him down for being different. While she appreciated his fondness for nature, she found his love for arcades and anime perplexing. She would unknowingly spark his interest in the military, particularly the mercenary lifestyle, through her stories and experiences.

At age 7, his parents decided to get a divorce due to their differing spiritual beliefs, which were starting to clash more and more. He lived with his father for the most part but was allowed to visit his mother whenever she was between assignments or not away on mercenary work. He also began to take up baseball, which became his favourite sport to play and watch on the big screen.

At 12, with the support of his father and his Ojibwe community, he embarked on his spiritual quest. Ralf recalls that it produced visions of his future life as a great warrior and storyteller, revealing that he's an esper and teaching him how to harness his powers and access his Super Devil form. After a period of isolation and fasting, it revealed the spirits of his ancestors and his three guardian animals: the wolf, turtle, and otter. Through this experience, he developed his survival skills, gained maturity, and strengthened his connection with nature and the divine forces of life.

At age 14, before embarking on a mission against mysterious terrorist cultists, Javiera gave him her silver milagro charm for safekeeping, telling him it would bring him good luck and protection. Tragically, that mission proved to be her last, as she was captured and tortured to death. When Ralf received the devastating news, he struggled to come to terms with it and felt overwhelming guilt, as if her fate was his fault because he possessed her milagro charm. Although his parents were divorced, Gabriel was deeply saddened by the news and did his best to support Ralf through his emotional turmoil.

When he turned 20, his father was killed during a robbery at the arts and crafts shop he owned. To make matters worse, he was facing financial difficulties at the time and struggling to find a stable job. In his desperation, he turned to an illegal fighting ring, drawn by the promise of cash prizes likely funded by other criminal activities. He participated in numerous fights, both in the ring and on the streets, for profit, eventually becoming the most skilled fighter among them. Ralf also discovered a fondness for THC-infused gummies, which provided relief from his emotional pain and served as a pleasant indulgence.

All of that changed when the Ikari Warriors discovered the famous street fighter's true identity as an esper after he joined their biennial tournament. With little convincing needed, Ralf joined the Ikari Warriors, driven by a desire to carry on his mother's legacy and explore the world. He excelled in all aspects of the military training he received, particularly in utilising his esper abilities and mastering hand-to-hand combat. The news that the Ikari Warriors had recruited another esper caught Clark's attention, but he was hesitant to approach Ralf. However, after a mission against a corrupt politician attempting to seize control of Brazil, Ralf and Clark became fast friends. During his time with the Ikari Warriors, Ralf formed close friendships with several comrades, including General Kawasaki, Second Lieutenant Cook, Eikichi, Leland, and Byron.

Ralf has been on numerous missions for the Ikari Warriors, rising through the ranks to become a colonel due to his natural leadership skills and courage on the battlefield. He and Clark played a crucial role in defeating a secret society, referred to as the Serapion Fellowship, that had infiltrated and influenced much of Latin America's political and religious landscape, a group that would later evolve into the Ptolemaic Army.

In another notable operation, Ralf, Clark, and a few comrades successfully rescued Elise, the U.S. President's daughter, from a massive criminal organisation that had planned to exploit her to gain access to the President's funds and harvest her organs. Ralf fondly recalls this mission, as it earned him a Medal of Honor from the U.S. President. He acquired Harpe during a mission in Greece where terrorists had raided a recently discovered catacomb. Additionally, he obtained Yawarakai-Te during a separate mission in Yamagata, Japan where a cult with illegal weaponry had taken over an old village, intent on instigating a nationwide war.

Ralf has endured numerous tragedies, fueling his determination to improve and protect the innocent. He witnessed the devastating loss of General Kawasaki during a battle against a cartel in Mexico, where he was tragically crushed and burned alive by flaming debris from a missile strike. Second Lieutenant Cook fell victim to a traitor within the Ikari Warriors, who betrayed them to a bioterrorist group during a mission in Czechia, resulting in her assassination. While investigating a town ravaged by a guerrilla army in Saudi Arabia, Byron was horrifically devoured by a swarm of Man Eaters. Leland met a brutal end during a mission on a stolen submarine, where he was fatally gutted by a criminal. Eikichi suffered a terrifying fate when a Mutated Soldier latched onto him while investigating an abandoned laboratory, promptly exploding shortly after.

During the Great Morden War, Ralf made a name for himself as he single-handedly successfully defended the United States against the Rebel Army's invasion. Notably, he destroyed a massive Rebel aircraft that had been using captured men, women, and children as hostages and human shields. However, upon destroying the aircraft, Ralf was met with devastating news: there were innocent civilians on board, and they had all perished in the attack. This heroic yet tragic act caught the attention of the Regular Army's high command, who subsequently approached the Ikari Warriors to propose a strategic alliance. The offer was readily accepted, and as a result, the Ikari Warriors were integrated as the elite mercenary branch of the Regular Army.

As a way to support the Regular Army and show his respect, Ralf frequently trains new recruits to hone their melee combat skills. Due to his mercenary work, he rarely had the opportunity to meet members of the Regular Army's other special forces. He had always heard heroic stories about Hyakutaro and the elite members of the P.F. Squad and S.P.A.R.R.O.W.S., especially those from the Great Morden War and the Martian-Rebel Alliance War. He initially hoped to meet them in person, fascinated by their tactical prowess and teamwork. This dream eventually became a reality during a mission against the Invaders.

[nemainofthewater]

Masterlist of polls

If anyone wants to filter out the polls, I'm going to tag everything with '#cdrama poll' going forward! (and please let me know if I forget!)

Current poll:

Best Book Adaptation (Danmei)

Best Book Adaptation (BG/Het)

Best Book Adaptation (Other)

Past polls are under the cut!

Masterlist of minipolls

Worst played instrument | Best opening song | Best end song | Best cover | Most dramatic weather | Best non sword weapon 1, 2

Lying liar who lies | Doctor most likely to tie their patient to the bed |Character most likely to be responsible for the invention of ancient fantasy China bleach | Most long suffering lieutenant

Goodest boi | Heroine most likely to kick your ass | Female antagonist most likely to awaken things | Amazing cooks | Most convincing cross dressing

Most likely to fake own death to avoid committee meetings | Precious cinnamon roll, too good, too pure | Best Character with [X] Surname polls part 1, part 2 | Most Likely to be Anaemic | Worst Shixiong | Best OT3

Best Jin Yong Adaptation Masterlist | Best Book Adaptation (Animated) |

Worst (Alive) Father | Best (Alive) Father | Most Expressive Fan | Poorest Little Meow Meow | Cdrama most likely to be stuck in a time vortex

Brattiest Younger Sibling Energy | Funniest product placement | Most likely to write a trashy romance novel | Drama/film most likely to give you the munchies | Most gremlin to ever gremlin

Most likely to be in deep debt with their tailor | Most puppy dog vibes | Cdrama mum most likely to help you successfully plan a coup | Worst cook | Most divorced energy | Best white haired character

[blubushie]

ABOUT ME

READ THIS BEFORE YOU SEND ASKS/INTERACT. ASK BLU ANYTHING DAY (ABAD) is on the first full weekend of every month!

MINORS: Block the "#blu lewd" tag OR I WILL BLOCK YOU and do not DM me unless it's to ask to join Blucord. This goes ESPECIALLY if you're 16 or under. Adults on the internet are not your friends, and I am not comfortable speaking with you privately without a third party present.

G'day fellas! You can call me Blu, and I can be invoked like some Lovecraftian horror by mentioning Sniper in the TF2 tags. King of Sniper Lore (and Australia), Messiah of Bludaism, also known as the "Sheepshagging Roorooting Horsehumping Mountainfucking Melonpiping 13x-Divorced Breastmaster Hitman Inenrt Dingoboy Piss Cheese Jorts Bludysseus Blu'nt Bushgod Sniper Blog" despite not being a Sniper blog (and not actually shagging a sheep or rooting a roo or being married to start with or caring all that much for cannabis, I'm a psychedelics bloke). I'm just Like This.

Been told I'm the "Sniper kin of all Sniper kins." Not sure what a kin is these days but from what I've heard I'm content with not knowing.

This is my only blog. I have three sideblogs. One is @blu-doods, where I post my shitty stick figure art for laughs, and the other two are @art-reblugs, where I reblog art on (I reblog art here too, but the pickings are far more slim) and @post-reblugs (same as art but for text posts).

Again, not a Sniper roleplay blog. That said feel free to call me Sniper as a joke because I do very much enjoy it. Just keep in mind that I am my own person and not a fictional character. There's a real person behind the screen.

Sometimes I go on tangents and start infodumping. You can find the masterlist here. Also please read my DNI list and check out my pronouns page (I spent so much time on it).

My ask box is always open to whatever you want to say. Questions, comments, infodumping, or whatever else comes to mind. I particularly enjoy things relating to TF2, astronomy, nature, classic cars, and weapons. :]

If you find a weird animal or plant and want to know what it is, send me a picture with the location and there's a fair chance I can ID it! ("Location" doesn't need to be city, just state or general region!)

If you're looking to do art or something of me, please see this post for a guide to what I look like and this post for my rules on what is and isn't acceptable!

We now have a Discord server! If you want to join just DM me, but please ask only you and I are mutuals or we interact often :]

My avatar was done by the incredibly talented @grumpygrumblet!

SOME INFO ABOUT ME

I have autism, selective mutism, and some other issues that aren't really important. Point is that sometimes it can be hard for me to talk or properly put my thoughts into words. This makes me come across as cold sometimes. I'm not good at communicating with words and I'm better at expressing it in person where I can rely more on touch. I apologise if I seem rude because I'm not trying to be. Let me know and I'll try to articulate what I mean to say in a gentler way.

I'm 23.

Bushstraight. AMAB transmasc. Weird bloke.

I grew up in Alice Springs and spend most of my time in the NT. On the first Friday of the month there's a good chance you can find me at the Daly Waters Pub. CU in the NT! (Not now though because I'm stuck in America for the foreseeable future. Oops. Try me again in 2025!)

I hunt professionally for pest control. Usually it's invasive animals like pigs, cats, or feral dogs. I'm also licenced to occasionally deal with nuisance native wildlife like crocodiles, but aside from assisting in relocation efforts I've yet to be called out for a crocodile. I'm alright with this—I really don't want to shoot a crocodile.

I also hunt to feed myself and my dog. Her name is Misty and she's an Australian Shepherd/Golden Retriever mix. You can see her here or by checking out my "mistyposting" tag.

I used to participate in kangaroo culls and by law I have to shoot them in the head so if you ever want to know what it's like to pop skulls, reckon you can ask me. Also on the kangaroo thing: if you're Australian and from 2020-2021 ate kangaroo or bought kangaroo dog food or leather, there's a chance I'm the one what got it to you.

I'm a bushie. This means I'm a survivalist who lives out in the bush. I technically live in a van (ute + camper in the tray) but if there's good weather I'm usually sleeping outside unless it's an area with a lot of dingos (they don't usually bother people but I'm not going to take risks with my dog). I have no permanent residence and I move from place to place for work. Occasionally I have to go into cities for work (I'm looking at you, M*lbourne) but these are thankfully rare occasions and only when I'm strapped for cash.

Sometimes while clearing a squatter's land I'll find Psilocybe mushrooms and take them back home and get high when I'm done working. It makes for an interesting experience and my favourite thing to do is lay on the top of my van and watch the stars for a while.

I have a mullet and I am awful proud of it. It's easy upkeep since I can cut it using the mirror of my van.

I've drank my own piss on more than one occasion. The first time was because I was dying of dehydration out in the bush and it kept me alive for 2 days until I found water. The second time was for science. Certified Piss Kink Guy. (Editor's note: I do not in fact have a piss kink.)

I have infinitely large balls.

I am a bogan. I am proud of that too. Viva la boganism.

I am Ameristralian. I was born in the US and came to Australia when I was 2 years old—both of my parents are American but my parents lived in Australia for work. I grew up in Australia but when my parents split Dad went back home to California to buy back my grandfather's station and I spent most of my high school years in California (years 10-12) and lost my accent. I now live in Australia with a very thick American accent so I get the "lost tourist" spiel a lot and I reckon I'm never going to stop having to prove I'm Australian. It's gotten me into pub fights before and will continue to do so. I had a stroke in 2023 and now have my Aussie accent back LMAO

I've been told I'm "Sniper IRL." (Cheers, bloke I met in a Sydney pub, for getting me into TF2 by telling me this.)

I fucking love crocodiles to a possibly dangerous degree. Technically I love everything nature and especially animals, but crocodiles are just something special to me. I blame Steve Irwin and the fact my favourite thing to do as a nipper was go up to Darwin with Mum during the dry season and go croc spotting.

I like TF2, nature (particularly plants and animals), astronomy, and history. My special interest is sniping. I also love science and medicine. PLEASE ASK ME ABOUT THESE THINGS BECAUSE I LOVE TO TALK ABOUT THEM.

I swear a lot. I will not apologise for it. Fight me, cunt.

Please ask me about the shit I've seen out in the bush. I have so many stories. Actually, just ask me anything. Just talk to me in general, please. I need it.

I like knives (penchant for Bowie knives and machetes), firearms (penchant for antique bolt-actions), and old cars. I think pre-1970 Land Rovers are pretty spiffy. I can alternatively be invoked by incorrectly stating what model of Land Rover Sniper drives. It's a bloody 1965 Series IIA!

DO NOT ATTEMPT ANY OF THE SHIT YOU SEE ME DO ON THIS BLOG. I AM A PROFESSIONAL AT WHAT I DO—ATTEMPTING TO REPLICATE IT IS LIKELY TO RESULT IN SERIOUS HARM AND/OR DEATH. DO NOT GO INTO THE OUTBACK UNLESS YOU ARE WITH A GROUP AND HAVE AN EXPERIENCED GUIDE WITH YOU.

If you wanna learn the rest of the lore, you'd best delve the blog. ;]

I can also be found on AO3 also under Blubushie.

A GUIDE TO MY TAGS

IMPORTANT BLOCK TAGS

blu lewd: Horny asks and reblogs of suggestive art. I'm making a tag for this since I've been getting so many asks from thirsty anons (I love you, thirsty anons). MINORS: BLOCK THIS TAG OR I WILL BLOCK YOU.

haemocyanin: Usually reblogged gore art (blood is not included in gore, I'm talking viscera). Also includes discussion of gory topics. THIS TAG IS STRICTLY GORE. Please block this tag if that makes you uncomfortable.

blu slew: Discussion of hunting. May contains photos from hunting. This includes animal death/animal gore, so anyone who is uncomfortable with seeing this PLEASE BLOCK THIS TAG.

blu a fuse: Angryposting. Will include venting—if that bothers you, block this tag.

blus blues: Venting/sad hours/personal, generally depressive, journals. Basically me screaming into the void about how shit sandwich my life is. May include discussions of trauma so if that bothers you, block this tag.

blu jarate: Anything that mentions piss in referral to urine because it's brought up a lot on this blog (not in a kink way, just in general). Block this tag if piss makes you uncomfortable.

blu boos: A personal medical journal of sorts. Block this tag if talk of injuries disturbs you.

Postbin: Hate asks. Will probably include transphobia or homophobia or intersexism because people pick on the easiest things ay? Block if you don't want to see people clowning on me.

GENERAL TAGS

💙: Random thoughts or stuff from me. No worries, I don't ramble often. Also contains reblogs of things I just Vibe With that don't fit any of my other tags. Formerly #bluposting

💬: IRL quotes. Usually things between me and my father, but sometimes includes other people.

blu news: Updates on my life. This may include failsafes.

blu whos: Answered asks. Please send me asks or talk to me in literally any way as I often spend weeks without even seeing another human out in the bush and let me tell you it is NOT good for one's state of mind. I may not like people but humans are social animals and it's a terrible Catch-22. Ask me about my work or life or my fic or about TF2 lore or Sniper or literally anything please.

abad: Discussions or asks from Ask Blu Anything Day, a monthly... Event? Where some of my ask rules are suspended. ABAD is your licence to go nuts in my ask box, and the rule of ABAD is that I have to answer everything honestly.

mercposting: Catch-all TF2 tag. As I get asks about TF2 often, this is the tag used so I don't clutter the main tag.

blu drew: My sketches. I don't do digital art so all of it is traditional and usually of varying quality. It's typically animals or plants I see out in the bush.

blu bushie: My adventures in the wilderness.

🍄🍄🍄: Contains discussions of drugs.

🍄: Triposting! These are trip reports from the times I get high on various different drugs, but usually mushrooms. Also contains any posts I reblog or make while under the influence of drugs. (Formerly #blu flew)

🍺🍺🍺: Contains discussions of alcohol.

🍺: Drunkposting! Contains any posts I make while under the influence of alcohol.

learnin the blus: Random thoughts/rambles regarding my fic.

blu hoohs: NOT MY ART. Just stuff I've REALLY liked and reblogged. My own art is never tagged with this.

blus clues: Me speculating on headcanons and lore, usually about TF2. I love lore speculation.

sniperposting: Shit specifically about Sniper since I seem to talk about him so much. Also things from my life that Sniper would also probably do.

bushman: Reblogs relating to survivalism, bushcraft, camping shit, and general bushman activities. Also includes reblogs of things related to these.

blu planet: Reblogs relating to nature and the natural world.

blu zoo: Discussions of animals and plants. May contain pictures of things I see on my adventures!

stockman: Discussing my former job as a stockman.

blu pew: Weapons, mostly firearms and knives.

true blu: Things specifically relating to Australia. Usually cultural things.

code blu: Things relating to medicine. This especially applies to bushmedicine.

blursed: Reblogged shit that I think is cursed. Usually text posts, sometimes images.

blusome: Just uplifting things I see and reblog. Everybody needs some added light every now and then.

blu spew: Funny things. Titled for me spewing out my coffee in the morning when I see them.

blu polls: My polls.

blu views: The VERY rare occasions I discuss politics. Most of this is either about firearms or rarely nature conservation.

mistyposting: Posts relating strictly to Misty.

moonyposting: Anything relating to Mundy, my emu. On this blog he's referred to as "Moony" so as not to have him confused with Mundy from my fic (or canon Mundy).

blu tunes: Anything relating to music.

blu chew: Anything relating to food.

recipe: My recipes and recipes I've come across. :]

ford blu: Anything relating to cars.

blu id: Posts where people ask me to identify animals and plants.

blu marbled jack: Anything relating to Jack. This is because I once saw him eat an entire block of cheese.

ask game: Ask games I find.

answered asks: Answers to things I've asked.

blubook: Posts relating to literature. It's a pun about the Australian boobook, a type of owl. Get it? Because owls are smart? And it's reading? Nevermind.

fanart: Art specifically of me because I get a lot of it (and adore it when I do)!

blucord: Discussing things that go down in the Discord server.

blu muse: Poetry I write (because apparently I'm doing that again).

blu misc: Anything that doesn't fit into the rest of these tags.

blu queue: Queued posts.

blu reviews: Submitted posts.

bluroarer: Things I'm tagged in.

smoke signals: Back-and-forth discussions in reblogs.

dozposting: Posts about my lovely lady, @eyes-like-iron-fangs-of-rust

horseposting: Me talking about horses. I fucking love horses.

dream journal: Where I log my dreams.

eminence: Me infodumping about DND/my DND character Redd (cuz Redd + Blu = eminence purple).

PMP: Info relating to my job as a pest management professional.

matildaposting: Me discussing my late 70s Dreamer camper or other campers.

🌌: Wereshitposting—late-night blogging I get up to when the world is quiet and I can't sleep.

Also I'm writing a Speedingbullet fic on AO3 because it's boring out here and I have brainrot so go read that I guess, cheers. Chapter 10 is my magnum opus.

Here's the link to the original F/M version of the fic, and here's the link to the M/M edited version of the fic. The M/M version isn't as good and there may be pronoun errors here and there because the F/M is my primary focus and how the fic is originally written. The M/M version is also discontinued at Chapter 7 as I couldn't work Jesse's backstory properly into Jake. Sorry, folks.

If you're looking to do fanart or something I have a reference for Jesse and Suki. I also have an appearance detail for the rest of BLU team. (If you do fanart of Jesse and Mundy together I will love you forever and ever.)

[alicepao13]

Hudson and Rex S06E11

Retrospectively, this episode had a good promo, as it made it look more high-stakes than it actually was. That’s not to mean it was a bad episode but the actual episode made Rex's situation look decidedly less dire.

We get right into it, and I think I’d have preferred a first scene with Sarah picking up the phone and being told that Charlie is in the hospital, or a scene where they find Charlie. And their first interaction seems bland, sorry.

That lady is creepy. She could be an unsub on Criminal Minds.

Charlie’s threshold above which he can leave the hospital is: “Can I walk?” *limps, staggers* “Eh, good enough. Let’s go find Rex.”

I get why creepy lady had to treat Rex, script-wise, but after that point it was like his injury practically disappeared. Another miraculous recovery. 

"I never should have let him chase that trailer". What are you talking about, Rex chasing people is literally how you guys catch 80% of the criminals.

"I was being a cowboy". How this comes up after so many cases of both Charlie and Rex exhibiting this kind of behavior and is now considered cowboy behavior while in the past it has been considered police work, I don't know.

"Your bark is bigger than your bite"? The disrespect! Allow him to demonstrate.

"Rocky it is". Oh, hell no, lady.

You have to admire the astonishingly amateurish work of the thieves. They go to "steal" the horse, they get seen. They go back to get the clippers, they get seen again.

Hey, they're using Jesse as a detective again. Good for you, Jesse Mills.

They actually started searching the barns one by one? Oh, my.

Joe and Sarah keeping an eye on Charlie. But just. Keeping an eye.

Why is he talking with the guy like they had a mere brawl? Like, shove him against the wall, Rex is missing! I demand some violence for this.

I appreciate Sarah's tactile approach of making sure Charlie is okay every five minutes lol

Of course Rex, even injured and captured, would still be looking to get the murder weapon. A consummate professional.

"Cardinal rule of marriage, ask for forgiveness, not permission". What an idiot. You're at the divorce lawyer's door and you don't even know it, dumbass.

This might be the dumbest reason for a person to get caught in other people's bullshit and end up getting murdered. Being witness to a fake theft orchestrated by the person who actually owns the horse, and trying to stop it. In another show, the guy would become a vengeful ghost, rightfully so.

Oh yeah, that lady is scary. And apparently, abusive too.

Rex's ears perking up as he hears the sound of Sarah's car is like, "oh fucking finally, they've come to get me out of here". And then he gets sedated. Poor dog is having a hell of a day.

Charlie heard Rex's whine with... supersonic hearing? First the growling, now this. I think he's becoming part dog.

Oh yeah, this is what people with concussions and limps should do.

"Another blow to the head could be serious". Oh, you mean, another, other blow? Also, another concussion even weeks later can actually cause second-impact syndrome, and kill him. I think he's due for a vacation.

"I'll keep my head down". That response alone warrants some violence.

"Not hurt are you?" Well, it's been like a full day since Rex was shot. He's totally fine.

I think the promo overhyped the episode, but it was still good. I needed a bit more emotion from everyone, to be honest. The hospital scene could be longer but at least they remembered to show the side effects of getting a concussion, somewhat. I still maintain that someone should have died for shooting Rex, but that would be to satisfy me personally. The excess of violence should be acceptable if someone shoots a dog. See John Wick. Also, at which point will they come up with the idea to put a GPS tracker on Rex? A GPS tracker on Charlie would be a good idea too, for a grown man he's surprisingly easy to lose :P

At some point, all of this should blow over to a scene where Sarah accuses Charlie of being reckless, but I'm not holding my breath.

Promo: The SJPD precinct continues to be a dangerous place to work. I'd say there are smarter ways of getting the police's attention than trying to hold one of their people at knife-point. But hey, I appreciate it regardless. I'm glad the tone of the season has changed from "we don't know what the fuck we're doing" to "Hudson and Rex, in which everyone is having a terribly dangerous time".

[creekfiend]

Just wanted to say thanks for "people from culturally Christian backgrounds" because that seems like a good way to phrase it, and I'm going to try to remember to use it when I'm talking about this sort of thing. (I try to not be a dick to people, when possible, and trauma's messy and complicated.) I'm sorry that some people are being horrible in this whole discussion, and I hope you are doing okay.

I'm doing fine! I really sympathize with most of the people involved in this tbh (except the outright antisemites of course lol) bc like I HAVE seen a lot of reactive and reductive and unkind blanket statements about this by some jumblr people in which they are condescendingly explaining other people's realities to them. Which is my LEAST favorite thing. Jumblr can also be really... umm, dog pile-y in a way that I find frustrating and unproductive. However. I think it's also fairly obvious that most of these reactions are trauma responses, and while that isn't an excuse it is an explanation and provides additional context that I do not feel is irrelevant. For jews we have constantly been told 'well simply stop being jewish' like all the time by everybody, often at gunpoint. So like, when I see nonjewish atheists assert that stuff jews are TELLING you they have gone through "literally never happens" that ALSO REALLY SUCKS. like so so bad. Cannot overstate how much that sucks. Cannot overstate how much it sucks to see ppl I sympathize with deeply wrt their mistrust and hatred of like, organized religious authority, align themselves with people who refer to jewish atheists as "religious nationalists" for refusing to divorce themselves from their ethnic backgrounds/culture/community/traditions. That rhetoric is Just antisemitism in a form that has been used to cause real and violent harm to us in living memory.

Also really alienated by the idea that one must be This Vitriolically Angry About Religion to "count" as an atheist. Like what? That is bonkers. I do not understand why the people making seemingly reasonable posts about "actually here's some interesting writings by people from Islamic cultures or majority Hindu cultures or orthodox jewish cultures outlining the ways that the authorities in these societies have used religion to cause harm on a systemic level" (objectively true) seem to be aligning themselves with people who are doing the SAME THING TO JEWS that they resent being done to them -- e.g. condescendingly explaining to us that our negative experiences with a certain type of atheists Don't Exist or Don't Count or cannot possibly be rooted in antisemitism.

I find the whole thing depressing and troubling. I don't tend to follow jumblr because of the aforementioned issues I have w it but this backlash seems to me to be disproportionate and really hateful in a way that... combines poorly with the increased antisemitic sentiments being lobbed at jews from all ideological sides recently. I wish we could all be more congizent of 1. the role trauma is playing here for everyone and 2. the inherent lack of productive discussion that can be had when two parties are simply Trauma Responsing at each other back and forth endlessly.

Then there's the people who just get super aggressive about people "believing fake things" but I'm not sure there's any help for them. Sure wish that the nonjewish atheists who are not like that would disavow them though! I certainly am more than happy to say "acknowledging a cultural/societal dynamic that privileges one religion and culture as default and that existing in thay culture might cause people to have unexamined assumptions about other religions and cultures" should not be weaponized against individual people in order to bully them by insisting they are a thing that they manifestly are not (atheists aren't Christians. The fact that atheists from Jewish backgrounds will have Jewishness shackled to them regardless of their degree of identification with Being A Jew is actually bad and a function of antisemitism; it is not an aspirational dynamic we should be applying to other people simply because their cultural background is privileged over our own in our society.)

Like can we stop talking past each other and try to understand where people are coming from

People are expressing a lot of hurt and anger about atrocities and systems of oppression that I ultimately feel are totally interconnected. Because of this hurt and anger most people are not being precise in their language or prioritizing connecting or actual dialogue about this and instead focusing on dogpiling and gotchas. It's discouraging.

I'm a secular humanist jew with complex feelings towards both jewishness and atheism as concepts and movements. I want to understand and connect with people based on our common ground.

This is I guess all me being a big baby who is unsuited to internet fights but this one specifically feels really hurtful to me because I feel like my reality is being ignored and denied. I suspect a lot of people are also feeling that way. Which might be a good place to START the discussion to be honest.