#we've been spoiling him though don't you worry

[drakomod]

So originally I had just started doing adopts again because I was low on money these past few months and wanted some money to save for our FurEh trip with friends.

Well unfortunately life doesn't like to see us being proactive apparently because it decided to give us two great gut (and wallet) punches in the form of my car and our dog, Percy.

Percy was unfortunately diagnosed with stage 3 kidney disease last month. I was able to cover his initial vet bills but the unfortunate part about kidney disease Is that there isn't a cure. We most likely have less than half a year left with him. And I want to be ready if things take a turn for the worse.

The money that is for him would be put aside for the inevitable and heart breaking future vet bills. For now he is still spry and doing okay so we are doing our best to spoil him and keep him happy with what time we have left.

My car also decided to go caput a little over a week ago, we had hoped we could repair it ourselves but we can't. For only Repairing the most important parts it will cost us around $1100 to get it drivable again. If we want to repair everything on the car it would be more like $3000.

So I am here unfortunately asking for help. If you can't donate money I completely understand. If you would still like to help, sharing this post would still help so much. Any money sent through this link, twitch streams, commissions, etc. will be going towards fixing our car, Percy’s vet bills and then, if somehow there is more left over (and if there is then holy cow, wow) It will go towards our trip to FurEh, I think we're really going to need it.

I am also working towards opening my commissions soon if you would like to help out that way, keep an eye out! And of course there are still the available adopts as well!

tl;dr Percy is in the late stages of an incurable disease and our car broke down, both of these are costly and any help is greatly appreciated! ❤️

[e-vay]

My In-Depth Review of Sonic X Shadow Generations (Spoilers!)

I completed Sonic X Shadow Generations so I'm ready to talk about it! Remember, these are just my personal opinions about the game, so don't take this review as me saying that my opinion is "right." I'd hate to accidentally spoil the game for you, so all my thoughts are below the cut:

Did you mean to click "Keep Reading"? I warned you, there's gonna be spoilers here! One last chance to back out...

🖤

❤️

🖤

❤️

Okay here we go!

THE SHADOW PORTION

Let's start with what we've all been hyped about: the Shadow portion of Sonic X Shadow Generations. If you single out the Shadow story of this game, I think it is an absolute masterpiece! Everyone who worked on it gave it their all, and it clearly shows. I'd give it a 9.75/10.

THE GRAPHICS

The visuals of this game are STUNNING. These new models for Maria and Gerald Robotnik are perfection! I am so glad they went with the more 'cartoon' style for the human models, similar to what we saw in Sonic Unleashed. They feel like they belong in this world among these peculiar looking anthropomorphic animals, but they aren't so odd looking that they feel goofy. They found a perfect balance and I couldn't be happier with them. Speaking of character models, to see all the bosses throughout the years in this new high definition was a sight to behold! Though I do feel nostalgia for the lower-poly version of the Biolizard, it was great to see it as the creators originally envisioned. It went from this loveable (and admittedly silly-looking) salamander to a truly intimidating and disturbing looking beast. The animation is superb. The characters move so fluidly and the poses are dynamic and striking! The frame rate makes everything look and feel fast and smooth which is exactly what you'd hope for in a Sonic game. I also appreciated the variety of poses/animations even just for the different stage ranks. I found myself purposely replaying stages to get different ranks just so I could see the different animations Shadow had regarding his "performance" evaluation. That really adds to the replay value! I am a graphic designer for a living, so of course I have to gush about the design, too! The graphic elements that appear before, during, and after each stage are straight up BADASS! I love the 2D animated flame that appears along the stage name and the color scheme and sharp lines are so appropriate to Shadow, and are a very strong contrast to Sonic's graphic elements that are colorful and round in shape. These are small details that most people might not outright notice, but it really enhances the overall aesthetic of the game.

THE STORY

LOOOOORE! Sweet nectar of the gods, we were given so much more lore with this game! Even though the Shadow portion of this game was fairly short, they jam-packed a ton of information and I am forever thankful for it! If you didn't do so while playing, I highly recommend playing again and talking to the NPCs regularly for little nuggets of lore. I was initially worried that this was going to be a rehash of the same 'origin' story we've heard a dozen times already, but that was not the case! Instead of focusing entirely on the tragedy that happened on the ARK, we got to learn what life was like on the ARK while times were still good! Learning that Shadow didn't used to be confident at all, to the point where Maria basically doesn't recognize this confident version of him that we've all known him as. And that Shadow never did his homework??? HA! I loved the confirmation that yes, Maria WAS INDEED the person who gave Shadow his name, and the meaning behind it was EVERYTHING TO ME! (Also works so well for my my AU. IYKYK hehehe) Plus all the Robotnik family history?! MARIA HAD A LITTLE SISTER?!?! She'd be old now, if she's even alive, but will we ever meet her? Will Shadow ever meet her (and would he even want to, or does he feel like that chapter of his life is closed now)? What was she like, and how did Maria's death impact her and her parents??? I hope we'll find out some day! Plus getting to learn a little bit more about Gerald's sons was exciting too. Will more Robotnik family members make appearances down the line? What do they think of Eggman's misdeeds? I'm so curious for more! It was heartbreaking in the best way for Shadow to get to interact with Maria and Gerald again, especially knowing he can't do anything to change what will inevitably happen to them. His sense of desperation paired with the growing affects that Doom's powers were having on him really had me worried about what was going to happen to Shadow's state of mind and overall well-being. It was amazing to see the toll it was taking on his body and his mind. In particular, I'm thinking of the scene where Shadow goes to fight Sonic and you see him having to actually restrain himself and go easy on Sonic. I thought it a great scene to demonstrate how easy it would have been for Shadow to just give in to the rage and take Sonic out without hesitation, but his willpower was able to win in the end. I have heard some people saying they're disappointed that Shadow lost his Doom abilities by the end of the story, but I think it made complete sense for the story. Black Doom is insistent that Shadow isn't 'complete' yet and he has to be more like him in order to be 'perfect.' But that isn't true! Shadow is already the ultimate life form, especially because there's more to him than his Black Doom DNA. By rejecting Doom's influence in the end, that was Shadow's true evolution. He's perfect as he is. Obviously I could gush forever and ever about all the Shadow and Maria scenes, but words aren't going to do it justice. It was just so moving to see how different he is when he's with her. In fact, at the end of this game I believe this is the first instance we ever see a true, genuine, heartwarming smile from Shadow and it DEVASTATED ME! We are used to his smirks, but when he's trying to reassure Maria that everything's going to be okay, we get to see him truly smile and we aren't seeing Shadow the Ultimate Lifeform or Shadow the Destroyer/Weapon, we are seeing Shadow the Brother and it felt like the warm embrace of a security blanket. God bless the writing in this game.

THE ACTING

The acting in this game is incredible from a visual and auditory performance. The animators really pushed the acting of the character models and you can feel Shadow's transformations throughout the game and the toll it's taking on his body. The emotions are cranked up to the max and they didn't pull any punches. In the past, Shadow was often limited in his portrayal of emotions, but that wasn't the case in this game at all. We saw anger, we saw resentment, we saw panic and sadness, and affection. There was so much thought put into the shaking of his hands, the gritting of his teeth, the shrinking and dilating of his pupils, all to show what's going on in his head without even resorting to words. SO MUCH ATTENTION was put into how these characters moved and interacted with each other and it truly tugged at my heart strings. There were too many wonderful moments for me to break down, so I will just single out one for now and applaud the creative direction and the animators for these scenes as a whole. There's this moment right near the end of the story, when Shadow is trying to stop Gerald and Maria from disappearing for good. His gestures are wild and panicked, his pupils and irises are small due to fear, but then Maria simply frames his face and rests her forehead against his. It's subtle, but Shadow's eyes widen and then return to their regular size and everything from his stance to how his shoulders fall show what a calming presence Maria has and how she helped (and will continue to help) him find his inner piece. Those performances are going to stick with me forever! Mike Pollock as Gerald Robotnik was truly *chef's kiss* MP is such a fantastic actor with great range. Though his voice is easily recognizable, the manner in which he speaks as Gerald is so different compared to Eggman, that you couldn't mistake the two characters even just by listening. We have been so used to only hearing from the angry, driven-insane-by-grief Gerald that it was so refreshing to get to see and hear the calm, brilliant, caring genius that created The Ultimate Life Form. P.S. I'm going to be crying over hearing Gerald call Shadow "son" for the rest of my life, thank you very much. I don't care about the future crimes he commits, we got to witness Shadow's father in this game and I'm weeping. Kirk Thornton is not my favorite Shadow. That being said, he really gave it his all and I was pleasantly surprised by what he accomplished. One of the performances that surprised me the most was Mephiles! This is a credit to the writers as well as the voice actor. The sense of wild desperation in his voice as he fights to even 'exist' in this timeline was so visceral and terrifying. Sure the other villains had their "I'm the best, this world belongs to me" lines, but Mephiles' voice lines were on a completely different level to me. What a treat! Lastly, if you can, please replay the game in Japanese! Kōji Yusa's performance is STUNNING. Ooh I'm getting shivers just recalling his voice lines while you're playing through the stages. I don't mean to discredit the English voice actors, but I think this game is even better when listening in Japanese. Give it a try yourself!

THE MUSIC

This is a Sonic game we're talking about, of course the music is going to be fantastic! The score did not disappoint one bit. It was great to hear all the callbacks to songs in the past as well as new tracks that were catchy and enjoyable even after playing the stages several times. "All Hail Shadow" has always been one of my favorites, but the new instrumental version used for majority of this game was so haunting and eerie. It was a delight to my ears as well as my emotions.

THE BOSSES

I loved the chosen bosses for Shadow's story. It was great fun to revisit some of the more iconic baddies throughout Shadow's history, and even though some of the gameplay was the same, the battle would then shift and offer the player something new. However, it's actually the boss fights where I dock the game a few fractions of a point. The boss battles were far too easy to defeat, and I actually found them easier and easier as the game progressed. I beat Mephiles and Devil Doom so quickly that I didn't realize their fights were over already. One could argue this was intentional by design. After all, throughout the story Shadow is evolving more and more into the 'perfect' killing machine. It would make sense that the more Doom Abilities he acquires, the weaker these bosses would seem. Still, as a life-long gamer, I appreciate when I have to actually work to achieve the ending of a game. I would have liked more of a challenge.

OVERALL GAMEPLAY

Whether you're roaming about White Space or you're actually playing through stages, the Shadow portion of this game is an absolute blast. Even having played the Shadow the Hedgehog game (which I'm a fan of, btw), I feel like this game really gave you a better feeling of what it's like to be Shadow. I LOVED that I got to use Chaos Control way more than ever before in previous games. If you had the ability to stop time, wouldn't you take advantage of it every chance you could??? The opportunity to use Chaos (and Doom) Spear as frequently as you wanted and Chaos Control almost constantly really shows how formidable of a character Shadow is and just how different it is to play as him compared to playing as Sonic. I loved the 'free-roam' aspect of White Space compared to the 2D version in Sonic's story. Hunting for rocket parts or figuring out how to unlock collectibles was a lot of fun and let the player really explore these new Doom abilities to the fullest. I'll admit that I struggled with navigating some of the Doom abilities, but even so I still had a ton of fun. I already mentioned replay value, but before you even have to go about replaying the game, there is SO MUCH to this portion of the game! The amount of stages, challenges, collectibles within stages, FINDING the unlockables USING the collectibles you obtained from stages, even the mini challenges available AFTER you've completed the key challenges (I'm talking about the bell that's located above the challenge portal), all of it made for a ton of opportunities for play. I found myself wanting to take on every quest instead of begrudgingly going through it just because I'm a completionist.

My biggest gripe is that the game was too short. Am I greedy for wanting more? Probably, but I can't help it. The developers gave us a ton of content in the Shadow story, but I still would have loved to have a full length game of just this gameplay. I managed to complete the Shadow portion in a few hours, and that was even with me leisurely taking my time to get collectibles and get S ranks for stages before progressing through the story. I miss the days where games took much longer to complete. But hey, I'm a nostalgia-prone 33 year old, so I guess that's to be expected of me haha.

THE SONIC PORTION

Here is where Sonic X Shadow Generations loses more points for me, which is a shame because I think it's a great game overall. Admittedly, I was disappointed when I first learned that the Sonic portion of the game was just a remaster of Generations. I had really hoped we were going to receive something new to help elevate SXS Gens as an entirely new game, instead of just "Sonic Gens + Shadow DLC".

Don't get me wrong, the stages in Sonic Generations are fun to play. However, when you go from playing Shadow's story to Sonic's story, Sonic's side drastically pales in comparison in my opinion.

My other complaint is that for a remaster, they really didn't improve Sonic's portion of the game significantly (at least from what I can recall, as I haven't played the original Sonic Generations since it first came out in 2011). This was a missed opportunity to correct more of the drawbacks of the original game. However, I will admit there are some minor changes that were made that I was thankful for. Let's start with the positive before I point out some of the negatives.

THE STORY

As mentioned earlier, I acknowledge that Sonic Generations is just a remaster so it makes sense that the story didn't change much. That being said, there were some small changes that I did really appreciate and helped improve the story. One of the things that always bothered me about the original Sonic Generations was how indifferent/annoyed Sonic was regarding his friends. I mean, the story is about time being erased! His friends and home are literally getting removed from the fabric of time and Sonic seemed more inconvenienced than concerned. In more recent games, the writing has really focused on the value Sonic finds in his friendships and found family. He always has his signature cool, aloof attitude, but I think the writers in recent years have successfully showed just how much he cares about his group, whether the games were serious (Sonic Frontiers) or silly (The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog). The story wasn't drastically changed for Sonic X Shadow Generations, but some altered dialogue and blink-and-you-miss-it edits helped to cut that jackass attitude from the original and gave him more realistic reactions. Especially by having him respond when he rescues everybody this time! It never seemed right when Tails was first rescued and he's trauma dumping on Sonic about how awful the experience was and Sonic just sits there in silence haha. At least in the new version, Sonic reassures Tails that he's safe now. Also, huge kudos to whoever decided to alter that scene where Sonic is shoving Amy away by the face. I always hated that. Ship or not, you don't treat your friends like that when they're throwing you a bday party!

This is me getting nitpicky, but there were a few things I had really hoped they were going to improve, but remained untouched:

THE GRAPHICS

I was never happy with the visuals of this game outside of the stages (the visuals within the stages are great!). The colors are extremely oversaturated and the characters are way too intense and some are even off model (ex: Amy is so blindingly vivid magenta in this game instead of her signature blush pink. What the heck?!). What's worse, the cutscenes during the birthday party scenes are SO GREEN. The light bounces off the neon green landscape and reflects onto the already oversaturated characters, giving them an unappealing green glow. I get that the Sonic world is not realistic, but it felt like the scenery in these cutscenes made it look like we were watching a bunch of toys interacting on a playset instead of characters living in their world. Sure the visuals during the levels are great, but it's a real disappointment when I'm specifically not looking forward to the cutscenes in a game. I wish they would have tweaked that.

THE ANIMATION/GAMEPLAY

I have zero complaints when it comes to Act 1 (the "Classic" version) of the different stages. These look great, play great, and if you've played classic Sonic games then you can appreciate how identical the map of the level is compared to the originals. The issue for me lies in Act 2, aka Modern Sonic's gameplay. For the most part these levels are good, but there were a couple of small things that always bothered me that I was sincerely hoping they'd fix (and they did not). There are portions of Modern Sonic's gameplay that is SO. SLOW. I'm referring to when you are jumping from one Grind Rail to another, or when you are sliding under an obstacle. These animations are so bizarrely slow and make absolutely no sense when your character is running blindingly fast. I don't understand why they didn't use this opportunity to fix those animations. When you're playing the Shadow side of the story, his animations are constantly fast moving and appropriately paced. Why wouldn't they apply these physics to the Sonic side?

As a whole, the Sonic portion of Sonic X Shadow Generations is still a fun game, but I think it could have used a little more attention to help it feel more balanced compared to the Shadow portion.

-

This game also has some notably fun DLC and the promise of more DLC in the future! I have my Sonic side of the story set to the Sonic Adventure Legacy skin and Sonic Jam Legacy skin and they are so CUTE! They win all the nostalgia points! I'll be honest with you, I have never been a fan of Terios' design hahaha. BUT! I love that they made a Terios skin for this game so players have the chance to play as him if you choose and we get to see how he was intended outside of the initial sketches we've all seen. (Still, y'all can keep your Terios skin. I won't touch it LOL!). And I am OVER THE MOON ECSTATIC for the upcoming Movie Shadow addition to the game! I still can't believe they got Keanu Reeves to voice lines for it! I'm sure it will be a small thing, but I am on the edge of my seat to see what that will be like.

-

Overall, I'm super happy with the game as a whole and I enjoyed every minute I played of it!

If you read all of this, thank you for reading! Again, my opinion isn't fact and if you disagree with what I had to say, that's totally fair. And if you haven't played the game yourself, please go play it and see what you think for yourself!

[mingoooossii]

Paper rings.

Wooyoung x reader

Synopsis: woo and paper rings ig.sorry idk. Warnings: reader is sick though it isn't mentioned what kind of illness. Slight angst. Overall it's fluff. Ig hurt/comfort?

A/n: it's not like I'm obsessed with hospitals or anything.

"Tada!" Wooyoung exclaimed as burst into your hospital room. A wide grin stretched across his face, his eyes sparkling with a childlike excitement.

"Look, i made you another one! " he exclaimed, his voice barely containing his enthusiasm. In his hand, he held a brandishing a new creation – a vibrant paper ring, meticulously folded and adorned with tiny origami cranes. "It even has your favorite lucky symbol!"

You propped up against the pillows, offered a wan smile. Your hair, once vibrant, was now wispy and thin, framed by a stark white headscarf. Yet, your eyes still held the same spark of mischief that Wooyoung knew and loved.

"Woo, you spoil me." you teased, voice slightly raspy.

His grin faltered slightly. Your usual adornment, the mismatched paper ring he'd made weeks ago, was absent. A childish whine escaped him. "Hey, where'd the other one go?"

Your smile softened. "Oh, that one? I, uh, took it off when I went to the bathroom earlier. Didn't want to get it wet." You explained, a hint of self-consciousness in your voice.

Wooyoung's eyes softened. He knew the real reason. He knew how much you treasured his little creations. He'd seen the way you'd carefully placed the ring on your bedside table before falling asleep the night before.

Taking the new ring, he carefully slipped it on your delicate finger, the paper cool against your skin.

A lump formed in his throat. He wasn't naive. The harsh reality of your condition loomed large, a constant shadow they both acknowledged with a silent understanding.

Yet, in that moment, he pushed the darkness aside. He squeezed your hand gently. "Don't worry about that, silly. I can make you a hundred more if you want."

He may not have been able to take away your illness, but he could fill your time with laughter, with the simple joy of their friendship. He would be your rock, your confidant, your source of strength, as long as you needed him.

He continued his charade, pulling out a marker and another sheet of paper. "Alright, choose your colors, sunshine. We've gotta adorn your fingers with a whole rainbow!"

A weak giggle escaped your lips as you pointed at your favorite shades. As Wooyoung set to work, meticulously crafting another paper ring, a silent vow echoed in his heart.

He knew the road ahead would be difficult, but as long as he could make you smile, even for a fleeting moment, he would keep fighting, keep creating their own little world and make sure your days were filled with as much laughter and love as possible.

[nykuna]

HEAVEN

pairing : geto suguru x fem reader.

cw : confession, fluff, kissing.

synopsis : After meeting you in Europe, Suguru had begun to develop feelings for you, but didn't dare say them, for fear of spoiling everything.

jjk alternate universe : no jujutsu sorcerers, everyone is human.

disclaimer : This is a spinoff from my fanfiction: the irony of fate (sukuna x reader).

word count : 2.4k

While he was smoking on his balcony, Suguru's phone began to ring, and he saw Gojo's name on the screen. They had become quite close since the party, and although they were very different, they found great comfort in each other.

It wasn't often that Gojo called him without any reason, so it piqued Suguru's curiosity. He took the phone and answered the call, his voice slightly raspy as he brought the phone to his ear.

"Hey, Gojo. What's up?"

"Hey man, am I bothering you?" He asks, escaping a slight yawn.

Suguru chuckled, a smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth as he leaned back against the wall behind him. "Nah, man. You're not bothering me."

He takes a deep hit of the blunt, exhaling a cloud of smoke before continuing the conversation. "What's up, dude? You sound tired," he teased, a playful tone in his voice.

"I didn't get much sleep yesterday, but I'll tell you about it another time." Gojo pause "I wanted to tell you I was leaving."

A slight surprise registered on Suguru's face. "Leaving?" He repeated, his gaze shifting as his brows furrowed.

He takes another hit of the blunt, the smoke dancing in the air as he exhaled. "Where are you heading to, man? Everything alright?" Concern laced his tone, mixed with a hint of curiosity.

"Yeah don't worry, I'm off to the States with Sukuna for work, I'll be there for three months." Gojo said in a breath. "I wanted to warn you so you don't worry, we'll call each other anyway!"

A mixture of surprise and annoyance flashed across his features, though they quickly settled into a smirk. "Three months, huh? You're ditching me here for such a long time?"

"I have no choice unfortunately, luckily you have y/n, otherwise you would have collapsed in sadness." Gojo says with a laugh.

A pang of guilt washed over Suguru's expression as Gojo mentioned your name. The truth was, he hadn't confessed his feelings to you yet, and he wasn't even sure if you felt the same way about him.

He let out a heavy sigh, the blunt hanging between his fingers. "Yeah, yeah. I have y/n. But she’ll go back to europe in five days, actually." He tried to keep his voice nonchalant, concealing the turmoil of emotions within him.

Gojo raised an eyebrow at Suguru's response, sensing his friend's inner turmoil beneath the surface of his nonchalant attitude.

"Five days, huh? That doesn't give you much time to make a move." He says, surprised. "So, what's holding you back? You've always been too damn hesitant."

Suguru’s gaze narrowed, a mixture of annoyance and embarrassment coloring his expression. "You don't have to point it out like that, smartass."

He took a deep breath, his shoulders slumping as he exhaled. "I just... I don't want to mess things up, you know? We've been friends for so long. I don't want to ruin it by confessing my feelings and making things awkward between us."

Gojo rolled his eyes in response to Suguru’s annoyance, shaking his head in frustration.

"Ugh, you’re always so serious. You have to take risks sometimes, man. Confessing your feelings might lead to something amazing, or it might end in a disaster. But at least then you’ll know."

"But if you’re too scared to make a move, then you’ll be stuck in this damn limbo forever, and she’ll just leave."

Suguru’s annoyance turned to frustration as Gojo's words hit a nerve. He knew deep down that his friend was right, that he couldn't keep hiding his feelings forever. But fear held him back, fear of ruining the friendship he treasured.

"I'm not scared, okay? It's just... it's not that simple." He grumbled, his irritation seeping through his words.

Gojo chuckled, amused by his friend’s defensiveness.

"Right, sure you’re not. Because spending a year pining over someone and doing nothing about it is a sign of a brave badass." He retorted, rolling his eyes again.

"You’re scared, Geto. Don’t try to deny it."

Suguru’s eyes darkened as Gojo called him out on his cowardice. His pride flared up, but deep down, he knew his friend was right. He was scared.

He answered Gojo, his expression hardening. "Fine. You win. I'm scared. Happy now?"

He took a deep breath, running a hand through his hair in frustration. "Anyway, i should get ready for work."

Gojo suppressed a smirk, knowing he had finally gotten through to his stubborn friend. "Finally, he admits it. Took you long enough."

"Yeah, you better get going. And maybe you should think about manning up and confessing your feelings while you’re at it." He added teasingly, a smirk playing on his lips.

Suguru’s expression shifted from one of frustration to resignation, knowing that Gojo had a point. But his pride wouldn’t allow him to admit it just yet.

"Yeah, yeah. Screw you, man." He retorted, but the anger in his voice was half-hearted.

He took a final hit of the blunt before putting it out, the smoke wisping away into the air. "I'll think about it, alright? No promises though."

~

His shift was finally over, but it had been an eventful night, since he'd had to tell his two best friends that Gojo and Sukuna had left, breaking their hearts.

But seeing his best friend's face so sad and hurt, he realized he couldn't risk putting you through the same thing. He had to confess his feelings as soon as possible, before it was too late.

So he quickly pulled out his phone and sent you a message, taking advantage of his burst of courage.

[Suguru] : Are you awake? I need to see you.

[y/n] : I was just answering some e-mails, come to my hotel, it would be good to see you.

Without wasting a minute, he jumped into his car and started the engine with a loud roar, he didn't have a minute to lose.

~

Arriving in front of your hotel room, he took a minute to concentrate on his breathing; everything was going to change tonight, for better or worse.

He plucked up courage and knocked on the door. He couldn't help smiling at the sight of you there, lit only by the soft moonlight streaming in through the window.

"Hey you! Come in I made us some tea, you must be exhausted." You say as you take his coat, smiling warmly.

As he stepped into the room, the scent of chamomile tea filled the air, and his gaze landed on your smile. It was a familiar scene, one that they had experienced countless times before.

He took a seat at the small table where the tea was laid out, his eyes not leaving your face as he tried to gather his thoughts. "Thanks," he mumbled, his voice softer than usual.

A silence settled between the two of you, the only sound was the faint whistle of the night air outside.

"Why did you want to see me at this hour? Is something wrong?" You ask as you sit down beside him, your tone slightly concerned.

His fingers traced the rim of the teacup, his gaze cast down. He took a deep breath, steeling himself for what he was about to say.

"No, nothing's wrong." He paused, his voice coming out more strained than usual. "I just... I needed to talk to you about something important."

"You're scaring me, you look like you've seen a ghost!" You laugh to try and lighten the mood, definitely noticing something different in Suguru's aura.

His lips tugged up into a faint smile at your attempt to loosen the tension. But his expression quickly turned serious again as he met your gaze.

"It's just... I have something I need to tell you. Something I should have told you a long time ago." He paused, his voice quiet and almost hesitant.

Your eyes widened at his words, what could it be? He seemed really shaken, so you looked at him in silence, inviting him to continue.

Geto's heart thudded against his chest, the weight of his confession hanging heavy in the air. He took another deep breath, his gaze fixed on the cup in front of him as he struggled to find the right words.

"I... I've been holding onto this for a long time. And I keep telling myself that I'll tell you someday, but I never did." He paused, his eyes slowly lifting to meet yours.

When your eyes meet, you feel your heart racing, as it always does for some unknown reason.

The look in your eyes was enough to send his heart racing even more, his own gaze holding yours for a few moments longer than necessary.

He swallowed hard, his throat suddenly dry. "I've been an idiot, a coward. But I can't keep hiding it anymore. I... I care about you, y/n. More than I've let myself admit."

"I care a lot about you too, Suguru, I always have." You say with a gentle smile, clearly not understanding what he's getting at.

His heart skipped a beat as you spoke, the words sending a mix of hope and pain surging through him.

"No, I mean," He shook his head gently, trying to gather his thoughts. "I more than just care about you, y/n. I... I'm in love with you."

You were too surprised to say anything, everything had become confused in your head, your gaze still locked in his, nothing could come out of your mouth.

The silence that followed was painful, each second feeling like an eternity as he waited for your response. He could see the surprise in your eyes, the confusion etched on your face.

"Say something, please," he whispered, his voice breaking slightly. "Anything."

Your mouth parted, but no sound escaped. You felt your heart speed up so much you swear it could have exploded. So he'd been feeling the same way...all this time?

"Suguru..." Was all you could whisper, still in shock.

His heart thudded in his chest as he heard his name leaving your lips, his breath catching in his throat. In all the scenarios he had played in his head, this moment was both better and worse than any of them.

He slowly reached out, his hand gently taking yours, as if anchoring himself to you. "I know it's a lot to process," he murmured. "But you had to know, I couldn't hide it anymore."

Then the silence intensified for long minutes.

"I think I love you too, Suguru."

Those few whispered words felt like a shockwave through his heart, a mixture of relief and disbelief washing over him. He couldn't believe what he was hearing.

His eyes widened, and he gently squeezed your hand, as if he needed a physical reminder that this was real. "You... you do?"

"I do. Since the day our eyes met for the first time." Your eyes begin to glow, no longer able to contain your powerful emotions.

He felt his heart swell with a flood of emotions as your words sunk in, his eyes locking with yours, mirroring your glow.

He couldn't believe it, that the feelings were mutual. It felt like a dream.

"All this time... and I never said anything," he muttered, shaking his head in disbelief. "I was such an idiot, I should have said something sooner."

"Don't be so hard on yourself, I could have talked about it too but..." You pause, lowering your eyes "I was afraid, afraid it would be impossible, given the distance between us."

His expression softened, understanding flooding through him. He squeezed your hand a little tighter.

"I was afraid too," he confessed, his voice slightly hoarse. "I didn't want to ruin our friendship, I didn't want to make things awkward."

He paused, a small smile tugging the corner of his mouth. "We were both idiots, huh?"

"Nothing new about that." You say jokingly with a slight smile, "But...how are we going to do this? I'm supposed to leave on Monday."

His smile faltered slightly at your words, the reality of the situation crashing down on him again. He had been so focused on finally confessing his feelings that he had almost forgotten about your imminent departure.

"I..." He trailed off, his mind racing to find a solution. But no matter how hard he thought, he couldn't think of a way to bridge the distance between them, at least not immediately.

"I don't know," he admitted, his voice quietly breaking. "I wish there was a way."

As you watched his face decompose, you felt your heart break into a thousand pieces in your chest. There had to be a solution, there had to be.

"I...could stay here?" You said in a low voice, a glimmer of hope in your eyes.

His heart skipped a beat as he heard your suggestion, his eyes widening in surprise. He had never even dared to hope that was an option.

He turned to face you fully, the disbelief evident on his face. "You... would stay? Here? But... what about your plans? Your life?"

"I'd love to make new ones with you, we could start from scratch, live our lives the way we've always intended...?" You say, raising your eyes to his, your gaze full of hope.

An array of emotions washed over him. Could it be possible to turn his hopeless dreams into reality? Could they really start a life together?

He took both your hands in his, his grip a little tighter than necessary. "Are you sure?" he asked, a mixture of disbelief and hope in his voice. "Giving up everything you've planned.. for us?"

"It would even be an honor, to say the least." You whisper simply as you move slightly closer to him.

A strange mix of disbelief and joy filled his heart, his mind struggling to process your words. Was this really happening? Were his dreams about to come true?

A slow smile tugged at the corners of his mouth, and he couldn’t help but pull you closer, his hands finding their way to your waist.

"I can't believe this is real," he murmured, his eyes locked on yours. "I don’t deserve you at all, y/n."

"Nonsense." was all you had time to say before he pulled you into a passionate kiss.

Time seemed to stand still as his lips claimed yours, the world around them fading away into nothing but a blur. His hands pulled you closer to him, his fingers splaying over your lower back, as if he needed to feel every inch of you to convince himself this wasn't a dream.

He poured all his suppressed feelings into the kiss, his heart racing in his chest, a mix of heat and urgency mingling.

He could die for your heaven, he could lie here forever.

Full fic on AO3 : https://archiveofourown.org/works/56234707/chapters/142859620

I hope you enjoyed it, Nyc <3

[bonny-kookoo]

ooh bonny I'm a sucker for angst 🤧 I gotta know (if you please) how things went for snowball princess before jin came back and/or while she was away from yoongi for basic training?

The clock ticking is an odd sound now.

It mixes with the low buzzing of the fridge starting and stopping occasionally, as you sit alone in Yoongis kitchen. There's a plastic container of leftovers from last night in front of you- reheated all by yourself, the microwave no longer scary after having taught yourself how to use it. Earlier, there was a staff member here, checking if you needed anything.

But now, you're alone. Truly so.

Yoongi won't come back like he did before- you'll sleep alone tonight, and somehow, it's not sad to you. Just.. odd. It feels strange to just not know what the guys are doing right now- whether or not they might think of you even. Probably not, since they're all distracted with training, new friends, and making sure they do well.

Will they be changed when they return? Will that new version still like you the same?

The first night alone passes by in a blur. You didn't eat the leftovers Yoongi made sure to pack up for you, instead you watch staff dump the contents out into the appropriate trash since they're now unsafe to eat for you. You feel oddly guilty watching it happen. Like it's your fault it spoiled.

It's obvious staff doesn't know what to really do with you.

You don't need anything, don't request anything- you eat standard instant noodles since they're easy to prepare, having watched the guys make them time and time again. And yet, even though you swear you did all the steps the exact same as Jungkook does-

It doesn't taste the same. Instead, it just makes you sad, salty tears quietly dripping into the bowl of noodles and broth you got in front of you.

You know you're just lonely. Your instincts just overreact to the unusual situation you're now in, none of your comfort people around anymore to give you any sense of security. It reminds you that you're not the same as them- that you'll never be the same, that there's always be some things you can't understand, and others they can't understand either.

You hide in bed the next day. Only come out when the staff member checks up on you.

When Yoongi returns, it's strange again- he comments on your low energy here and there, but after many answers of reassurance from your side, and even a doctor's appointment, it's clear that nothing is physically wrong with you. Nothing to worry.

It's just an inevitable change that's bound to happen at your age, or so the specialist had told Yoongi.

He refuses to really accept that- pushes it aside, and tries to take care of you the same way he did before. And it seems to work, at least in his eyes; you spend time again together, eat together, sleep together. Sometimes you spend your day at someone else's house, other times you stay inside the whole day. Yoongi takes you with him to visit his parents even, where you play with the family dog for a little and converse with his brother who'd visited coincidentally at the same time, before you go back home and get back into routine.

It's only when Jin returns, that Yoongi has to face reality.

"She's.. very quiet." Seokjin comments, as he sits on the couch, your head on his thigh as you sleep after dinner, lavishly cooked by him. "Have you maybe asked her to get-"

"We've been there already. They say it's 'normal considering her age'." Yoongi mumbles quietly, picking at his last bites on his plate before he abandons any further attempt at finishing his portion of the dinner, leaning back in the sofa as well, away from the table. "But it's so sudden. Maybe.. I don't know. Could it be something else?" He asks, and Jin looks at him.

"You mean mentally?" He asks, and the rapper nods. "Maybe. This has to be stressful for her, after all. Let's hope that maybe with one by one coming back, she'll come around as well." He sighs, running a hand over your head before he lets his palm settle on your shoulder. "I trust her that she'll tell us if she needs help."

"I hope she does." Yoongi worries, watching you sleep on his friend's lap-

Looking awfully troubled, even while dreaming.

[takami-takami]

"Oh my fucking god, you feel like heaven, baby–"

Keigo slurs his words as he repeats them like a mantra, one cheek smooshed down into the drool-soaked pillow below. It's a stark contrast to his sinfully raised hips, arching his back upward in a manner suited for well-behaved pups.

Even if you didn't keep in your memory the many times you've wrecked the man before you, it's obvious this isn't his first time.

His form is far too practiced. Though Keigo was the first to arouse the topic one fateful night years ago, twiddling his thumbs, you'd like to say you've adjusted to your role and trained him well.

Tonight, he allows himself a good spoiling; to gulp in air without shame, drowning in the endorphins that spark and bounce off each neuron like firecrackers in his brain.

"Need y'inside me, dove, always," he moans, high-pitched and pretty to match his rosy smile. "Oh god, right there—" he pitches a gasp.

"Mhm," you hum knowingly, angling your thrusts to bully his prostate. "Feels good?"

"Feels good," he repeats, clicking wet in his watering mouth.

Slowly, his hands crawl up to paw at the cotton of the pillow, eyes blinking half-open for a moment in an aroused and delirious daze, before fluttering shut once more. The friction of the sheets against his palms and cheek is delicious with each pounding thrust to the rhythm of the bedframe creaking below.

"Please let me cum, I-I've earned it, I've been good," he argues.

You scoff, unimpressed with his immediate justification for why he should have it rather than asking properly. On another night, perhaps one you felt a bit meaner, you'd remind him that he needn't worry his little mind: he doesn't have a lick of control in this situation.

"If you can cum untouched, maybe I'll think about letting y—"

Before you even have a chance to finish your sentence, pearly teeth are chomping down on the pillow as he humps the air, spilling himself with a whimper of, "hng— 'm sorry!"

Gentle hands smooth up and down the expanse of his quivering hips, shushing his bleary tears and hiccups.

"Aww, baby, don't be sorry," you coo, thumbing away globs of tears from his puffy cheeks. "You did perfect for me, angel."

His feathertips tingle and shiver with the praise, so you decide to make it better with a firm grip on his primaries.

"We've got all night, don't we?"

[danwhobrowses]

So a thing happened on Critical Role this week (campaign 3 ep 91), we're gonna talk about it - a long talk - so if you haven't been caught up and don't wanna be spoiled don't keep reading okay?

One of the disadvantages of being in a different time zone is that after fretting all morning, going to work, thinking 'it's 7am maybe it's done now' I had to sit in my office for a stressful final half hour murmuring don't do this don't fucking do this don't you dare fucking do this!

I already was worried for everyone given the cliffhanger last episode, and the 5 hour length made me further worried as players kept being knocked down by Otohan Thull - already frightening in base form but now with an even higher AC and empowered. Then Sam Riegel had to do what he does best, a devastating sacrifice where FCG blows himself up to take down Otohan - Ludinus' No. 2, harrowed for being proficient in slaughter, defeated by no assassin or warrior but a cleric saving their friends. We've been well past 'get off the moon' hours with this one, but now there is an impact on every one of the Hells to think about, which is what this will be about.

FCG Though he is dead there is still stuff to talk about with FCG's death. A common debate right now is the potential of the Reincarnate spell; while the wording of the death implies that FCG's current body is irreparable there is a chance that a 5th Level Druid Spell can fashion him a new body, one of flesh, bone and tongue. The body itself needs to be dead for less than 10 days so there is wiggle room to gain the necessary components too if the top brass of Exandria turn it into a fetch quest. There is argument on both sides though; if FCG comes back does it undermine his sacrifice? Perhaps, but there's no incentive for the Hells to not try. Reincarnation hasn't quite happened in Critical Role yet - Since Molly/Lucien/Kingsley was kinda different, he kinda had the opposite, different mind same body - so it'd be a refreshing new option and also a way to redesign FCG without having to create a whole new cleric (because they definitely need a cleric) with a whole new skillset that the Hells will need to warm towards before the final battle. But at the same time, the soul has to be willing. FCG was content with his sacrifice, and in the arms of the Changebringer would he go back? I'd like to hope so if it's an option, it'd also entertain a whole new character arc for him as a 'real boy' - plus Matt and Sam don't have to fully abide to the D100 rule of what race he turns into. Of course, I like this angle more than needing a new character, because I like happy endings and it makes narrative sense that the Hells would claw and bite to pull him from that sweet goodnight. It would also validate a reason for the Hells to align with the gods, because if divine favour comes into play and the Gods decide against helping Bell's Hells' greatest advocate for saving them then they are foolishly and callously forsaking key players to their survival, FCG reincarnating with the help of the Gods would play a big part in the Hells standing with them rather than losing faith in them, and even with friction between the Titans & Temults and the Gods from the past they would have a common enemy. Still living or dying can have varying effects on the other characters.

Ashton From the moment Ashton met FCG they wanted to make sure this little bot would be okay, that they'd learn to value their life and be able to thrive. While part of that did happen, Ashton is likely going to feel like nothing's changed since Bassuras; knocked out by Otohan and when awakened a friend is dead, another person they couldn't protect.

Before the shard, I think Ashton would very easily fly off the handle, in their anger they'd blame everything including themselves and maybe even consider leaving themselves, it probably have made them more self-destructive too. Now though I'm not so sure, nobody would hold it against them to waver a little on their promise to take care of themselves in a burst of grief, this was after all their best friend someone they looked after like a little brother, and while I can see Ashton quietly and angrily grieving I can also see Ashton double down on trying to keep their promise, making sure that FCG didn't go out like a martyr and that it won't be in vain. FCG reincarnating would assist in Ashton's character drive too, since I feel like they would detest any replacement cleric because it's not FCG, they may also be less abrasive towards the gods if they came through for them and proved that they care - at least to the Changebringer, think they'd still throw copper at the Dawnfather given the whole Angel incident.

Imogen As the nominated leader of Bell's Hells, many will probably look to Imogen Temult for action, the problem is she has her own mother issues to deal with too - and I'm not entirely sold that Liliana has fully made a turn just yet, only that she won't hand over the Hells to Ludinus. FCG's death is gonna produce a lot of guilt from Imogen though, she was detesting the fact that she had to play dead at 1HP while Otohan cut down her friends again, she will likely blame her inaction which in turn may push her to be more aggressive in combat.

At the same time, I can see her being one of the more gung ho characters to push towards the Reincarnate option, perhaps even going as far as to accost or lambast anyone regardless of alliances or rank who she feels isn't as committed. Imogen has been in the position of loss before, and knowing that FCG had a connection with FRIDA she would likely compel herself to fix it rather than have to deliver the bad news. Regardless of whether he reincarnates though I feel like Imogen may look towards some more defensive spells, and maybe through Liliana try to tap into the powers of an Exalted to try and match the power she saw from Otohan, a risky endeavour for sure but FCG took an even greater risk for them.

Orym Orym is probably the toughest of the Hells to read when it comes to FCG's death. There will of course be a deep sadness at the loss of a friend, but I would also sense a...not bitterness but discontent that this is how it went down. Otohan killed his family, he kept fighting her until he could no longer stand because that's what they would've done, and now she's dead but it doesn't make it better, he wasn't the one to do it, he didn't even see it, and the one who did is gone with her. When Bor'dor was killed, Orym coldly reminded himself that 'we're at war', but I don't think he can justify that way with FCG, the loss was greater than the catharsis.

The death also has to turn attention to his deal with Nanna Mori. Many have pointed out that there is a lot of technicalities that may prolong, void or complete the deal; it was never specified how many times the Hells could return from the moon to continue the deal, but at the same time they did technically return from the moon to Exandria safe and sound via the Secret Backdoor. Still, Mori is his best friend's grandmother, there could be leeway on that matter too and even if he does have to commit to the deal (which I call 'Fatekeeper Orym') it's never been explicitly said that Orym needs to constantly attend to Mori in the Feywild, only that he has to be her caretaker and answer her beck and call. However, FCG's death will likely provide a sobering thought that his deal with Mori was perhaps voided, unless there is one more thread he can have her pull. When it comes to seeking options to bring a friend back, I would keep a close eye on Orym - it's not the first time Liam's resolved himself to be damned before.

Fearne Fearne will likely be a linchpin if the Hells seek out Reincarnate. The spell is exclusive to Druids and if Keyleth isn't on hand to do it the task and pressure will fall to her. It'll be interesting how she reacts, I don't wanna say she'll be the most positive of it because she'll certainly be upset, but I can see her being optimistic even if it's to also convince herself, the one who is most encouraging to find a way. As a shipper I of course want her to be the one who comforts and gets through to Ashton while they grieve but if she also is key to his reincarnation that also adds to their slow-burn. Outside of that, FCG's death may also lead into learning about Mori's deal with Orym, which will probably anger her that Orym kept it from her, there is also the fact that having FCG's life in her hands may bring back bad memories of Bassuras and Whitestone. One must also especially worry about her Asmodeus calling card, the Prince of Lies does nothing for free and I still feel like Klask was planted in her path by Asmodeus' (and maybe even Athion's) titan-seeking design.

If FCG does reincarnate though, I could see her friendship with FCG being even greater than it was, since they'll both feel a greater zeal for life - it may also make her feel further distant from her Evil vision, since she will have saved half her friends rather than risked killing them. If not though, Fearne may have to play mediator for the new cleric and may also be pushed towards freeing up more slots for healing to provide more support for the Hells in future battles.

Chetney It's gonna be an interesting one for Chetney too, from one perspective you could see him thinking that FCG traded their life for his; he died, he made peace with that, but then the one who revived him died. Chetney's more personal mindset has often been cloaked in secrecy, perhaps as one of the least open of the Hells despite many claiming him as the Heart of the group, so I wonder if Chetney may harbour some Survivor's Guilt for what happened.

I can see Chetney being the one to keep his emotions close to his chest, even if FCG were to reincarnate he would perhaps try to shrug off that he always knew it'd happen anyway. That being said someone who remains stoic and unwavering may prove a positive or a negative to the group, depending on the person or their interpretation of it. If a new cleric comes along though I could see him being additionally protective of them, having been the new guy before.

Laudna We should all be worried for Laudna right now. The recent 4SD already revealed that Laudna's 'close to the brink' and I'm pretty sure this is the brink. The aftermath of the Otohan fight will likely push each of the Hells to get stronger, since had they hit harder or been able to take stronger blows it wouldn't have come to this, but that will mean bad things when it comes to Laudna, as she may seek to gain power the only way she thinks she can - through Delilah. After all her last two levels went to Sorcery and did little in the fight, whereas her Warlock class Eldritch Blasts hurt Otohan fairly decently, such a thing can linger in the mind for Delilah to manipulate.

It'll be telling if they do try to Reincarnate him whether the damage will have been done already to Laudna, and that the joy of bringing him back turns to tragedy of Laudna losing herself further, as it often does it will fall to how she leans on Imogen, and how open about it she'll be to her. If FCG is lost however, we may have to keep a very close eye on Laudna being next.

Bell's Hells As I mentioned with Laudna, FCG's death will have made something apparent and clear; despite everything Bell's Hells need to get stronger. Even at Lv13, even with Exalted powers, Fey bargains and Titan shards they still just barely escaped a TPK, and granted they were weakened and worn out but no fight is guaranteed to ever be fought at 100%. Otohan may've been the toughest General of the Vanguard but the other Generals - the Weavemind, Zathuda and the Dominon of Cruft Commander - are still not ones to take lightly, Ludinus is still not one to take lightly, and if Liliana is going to be used by him to become a vessel for Predathos, that cannot be taken lightly. Bell's Hells may need to look towards enhancing their stats as well as their equipment, the harness is still a factor too which can boost them all with enough enchanted items at their disposal. An interesting one would be if Otohan's backpack ends up in one of the Hells' hands; many beforehand have talked about Orym being an Echo Knight but I would personally like to see Ashton take it, since it is powered by the Potion of Possibility like their own Dunamancy powers, it's possible (eheh) that they may align in some manner and could you imagine Ashton + 3 Echoes all raging to get All 4 Dunamancies? Otohan's swords may also provide unique properties for Chetney and/or Orym to use. Reincarnation or not I feel like that may be the Hells' next plan once it's discussed whether to attempt Reincarnation and they're off of Ruidus, gathering allies will likely also be something to prepare for for the final battle given how Otohan stated that they have 'enough Ruidusborns' for their plan. As a group it is difficult to tell if this will strengthen or weaken them, it could strengthen them in a 'never again' way like the Nein, but they were also very enthusiastic about bringing Molly back - it drove them through several arcs - FCG however often was the Hells' beacon of hope and the self-imposed attempted therapist, without that the Hells will either have to put it upon themselves to go the extra lengths or they'll close further in on themselves. If FCG does reincarnate I feel like it would definitely strengthen them mentally but if not I am not so sure.

It shouldn't come to a surprise that I will hold onto the Reincarnate potential so that the Hells can get back their friend, but rest assured I'm worried for all of them right now, there are crossroads ahead.

[missmaywemeetagain]

Broken Glass Chapter 10 💔🥂❤️‍🩹

Ahhhh, my babies, we've finally reached the chapter I've been itching to tell you about for ages! And I cannot WAIT to hear what you think about it!

We left off in Chapter 9 with poor Lori fighting physical exhaustion and a gamut of feelings for Elvis (who's being a stubborn idiot), and when they arrived home to Graceland, their frustrations came to a head. Elvis finally confronted her about her past and a terrified Lori didn't take it well.

Now in Elvis' perspective, we pick up immediately after her collapse. He is mortified and lovesick and convinced that he's harmed her beyond repair. Oh, Elvis. 💔

Like I said, I can't wait to hear your screams about the twists in this chapter, so please don't hold back! 😁 I hope you enjoy!

Much Love! xoxoxox, Madi 💗

TW: Please scroll to the end only if you need them--I don't want to spoil anything for those who hate spoilers!

Broken Glass Chapter 10

Shit shit shit shit, Elvis chants in his head as you vomit violently onto the pavement, go grey as a ghost, and your terrified eyes roll back into your head. His lean arms wrap around you quickly when you collapse, keeping you from falling into your own sick or hitting your head on the ground.

“Shit,” he curses, out loud this time, following your center of gravity and scooping you up into his arms. “Lori! Come on, darlin’, wake up f’me,” he pleads softly.

Your body seems awfully tiny and much too light for someone who’s presence he can never truly ignore, even when he wants to. His heart slams in his chest, his blood already up from his temper, though it fizzled out the moment you started shivering and sobbing and apologizing like he was sending you to the gallows. The look of resigned fear on your face was enough to give him nightmares and that was before you’d lost consciousness.

He is no stranger to fainting women, it being a staple of his fame since almost the beginning. While he never could quite understand why he of all people caused such a reaction in young ladies, he was always as calm and gentle as he could be. It was his fault they got overexcited, after all—they couldn’t control it just as much as he couldn’t.

But this was different.

You certainly hadn’t passed out because you were overcome by the joy of his presence. Instead, you look like death, and he’s not remotely calm about it.

“What the hell happened? What’d you do to her?” Gene asks accusatorily, running up behind him, followed by the rest of the guys in various states of concern.

“What’d I do…? Shut yer damn mouth ‘fore ya catch flies, ya idiot, and go call the doctor,” Elvis huffs back, hoisting you up into his arms, swinging around, and hightailing it towards the house.

The fear that lances through him at your pallor and lifelessness hits like a knife. The seed of anger he’s held on to so tightly this last week withers at the thought he’s done real damage here.

This is my fault.

He’s not exactly sure how but he knows. He only had to take one look at your face when he called you out to understand you hadn’t meant to hurt him and your past scared you enough to risk the lie. Stupidly, he’d wanted the satisfaction of confronting your wrongdoing, for you to have a smidge of the hurt he was feeling.

But he never wanted this.

How could he have missed something was wrong? You are so damn strong, meeting every challenge thrown your way that he never considered you might be unwell. Selfish idiot, he chastises himself.

He comes close to kicking down the door to his home, but Charlie scoots around him fast enough to open it before he resorts to property damage.

“Come on, Little Bird, wake up for me,” he murmurs softly as he oh so gently sets you on the long sofa. He hates the boneless way you settle, eyes closed and completely unconscious. Nerves shudder down his spine and he doesn’t bother to hide them.

“Did someone call the damn doctor?” he yells at Charlie.

“Yeah, yeah, he’s on his way.” Charlie has the sense to look worried, unlike his idiot cousin who peers over his shoulder.

“Wipe that dumbass look offa your face and go get her some water!” Elvis snaps at Gene, who looks at him wide eyed for a moment before disappearing.

Brushing a lock of hair off your forehead, he holds and rubs your cold little hand in his as he quietly talks to you.

“I’m sorry, Lo, I-I-I shouldn’t’ve come atchu like that. I-I realize now that, um, maybe you had your reasons f’not telling me ‘bout your past. I jus’ thought you knew you could trust me, and-and it hurt that you din’t and sometimes I just get so mad I can’t see straight but I shouldn’t take it out on you…” he rambles quietly, “Please jus’ wake up, now, you gotta wake up, honey. I can’t do this without ya.” The admission falls breathlessly from his lips, soft as snowfall.

His heart plummets when he thinks about all the ways he’s taken his anger out on you this past week—ignoring you, throwing girls in your face, making snide comments—and his ego wants nothing more to justify his actions, but in truth, you were right. He had been playing mind games and not communicating why he was upset. He should have just asked you about it right after Frank spilled the beans instead of punishing you for something you didn’t even know he’d found out.

Lord, his mama would have his hide for such childish behavior.

Shame flames his cheeks and worries surround him like a dark cloud until the doctor shows up. You still haven’t so much as stirred and it has him nibbling at his nails—a nervous old habit he’s never quite been able to kick.

When Dr. Shaw arrives, Elvis shoos away the audience of men who’ve crowded the living room when he wasn’t looking. At least they all have the sense to look concerned.

“What happened?” Dr. Shaw asks, setting his bag down next to the couch.

“I-I-I don’t know exactly, one minute she was fine, well maybe not fine cuz we were in a bit of a disagreement, ya see, and well, she, maybe she was worked up? One minute she was standing there and the next she lost her lunch on the pavement and passed out,” he says, unsure if he’s making any sense.

“Did she hit her head?” The doctor asks, examining your hairline.

“Naw, I caught her before she hit the ground.” His leg jiggles uncontrollably, wondering if you’re okay, wondering what he could’ve done differently.

Dr. Shaw looks at Elvis over his glasses, taking in his nervousness. “Has she been ill otherwise?”

Elvis blinks. “Um, I-I-I’m not sure.”

The doctor is one of the only people who knows about his illness, who you really are and what you are doing here, so it’s unsurprising he looks a bit incredulous. “Elvis, you’re spending all of your time with this young woman, and you don’t know if she’s been ill or not?”

More shame bleeds through his chest and settles like a stone in his stomach. His face flushes red hot and the temperature in the room seems to have gone up without him noticing.

“Um, no, I-I guess not, sir,” he mumbles.

He knows his faults, and generally being uncaring isn’t one of them. But these past few weeks, he’s been thinking mostly about himself. His feelings. How your secret affected him. Not how it affected you, or why you might need to hide it. You’d tried your best to take care of him, apparently to the detriment of yourself.

No, he’d been mighty careless with you, and spitefully so.

Dr. Shaw gives him a pursed-lip look.

“I, well, now I know the new hours are keepin’ her busy, what with how I gotta live and all. I-I-I guess she’s seemed tired?” Elvis adds, desperate to fill the silence.

He doesn’t feel he can share all the other pieces, like how you’d been on the run from your mafia fiancé who’d…

Oh, Lord.

Dread rolls in his stomach when he realizes his misstep.

The nightmares. You quivering in terror on the bathroom floor. The bruises. Bruises he’d seen staining your body in places no bruise should ever be. The way you’d flinched when he touched you roughly.

Your fiancé had done that to you. That man was the reason you fled New York.

How stupid he was for not putting it all together sooner. Your fiancé hurt you, and you tried to escape the only way you could.

And Elvis was so afraid of loving you, so consumed by his own feelings, he punished you for it. Just another man in your life punishing you for something that wasn’t your fault.

Fuck.

His gut rolls, leaving him queasy. Through his horror, he wonders if you’ll ever be able to forgive him. If you even should.

Your little moan steals his attention as you stir slightly on the sofa.

“Lori?” he asks, jumping to, wanting you so badly to wake up so he can apologize, so he can make it up to you. “Please, baby, you gotta wake up now. The doc is here.” He grabs your hand and doesn’t even care how desperate he sounds.

“Mmm?” Your eyes flutter open and his heart swells to see those crystal blues start to focus.

“What happened?” you moan quietly, rubbing your eyes.

“You, uh, you got sick, darlin’ and then fainted,” he coos but there is an edge of disappointment in it, in himself.

Your eyes narrow and then widen with what he assumes is your memory coming back. He watches the trepidation and embarrassment fill your eyes. You slide your hand out of his, shirking back from him, and his heart crumbles a little.

I did this.

“Dolores, can you tell me what happened? How are you feeling?” the doctor asks.

Your attention pulls away from Elvis, your trepidation clouded by your struggle to focus.

“Oh, I’m sure I’m fine, probably just carsick from the bus ride,” you say, voice wavering, unconvincingly trying to blow off the concern.

“You’re not fuckin’ fine,” Elvis snaps before he can stop himself.

Your eyes widen and Dr. Shaw clears his throat.

“Excuse my language,” he apologizes, then tries to continue more gently, “but you’re not. You’re always gettin’ on me about not tellin’ you what’s what, so now you better answer the doctor’s questions truthfully, honey.”

There’s a beaten, submissive look in your eye that nearly breaks his heart. You turn your attention back to Shaw.

“I’ve had an ongoing headache for days…weeks, maybe? And I am exhausted,” you admit quietly. “Carsick on the rides. It’s probably just a virus. Nothing a l-little rest won’t cure.”

Dr. Shaw purses his lips. “I’d still like to do an examination and some tests. Is there somewhere more private we can go?”

“Upstairs.” Elvis jumps up, eager to be helpful and expend some of the nervous energy coursing through him. He extends his hand to help you off the couch, but you shrink back from him. Stomach churning with guilt, he watches as you warily push yourself off the couch to standing.

You wobble and sway on your feet, and his instinct kicks in as he immediately swoops his arm under you and lifts.

“Elvis, stop, I can get up the stairs by myself,” you protest halfheartedly, but by the way your body sags against him, he doesn’t believe you.

“Hush.”

Scowling, you don’t fight anymore, your eyes getting a dim and faraway look when your head plops on his shoulder with defeat. It’s worrisome.

By the time he maneuvers you up the stairs and into the bedroom, his growing unease has taken root. And it grows more when he sets you on the bed and you look like a shadow of your usual self. Like darkness is trying to swallow you whole and you are letting it.

He looks at Shaw, his eyes trying to convey the deep concern he now feels for your wellbeing, the concern that should’ve been there for weeks if not for his head being wedged so far up his own ass he refused to see what was right in front of him.

“Thank you, Elvis,” Shaw says, “Now, I’ll need some privacy to do the examination.” The doctor nods his head towards the door, dismissing him.

“Aw, hell no. I’m not leavin’ her like this.” He shakes his head stubbornly. The thought of her alone with any man but him suddenly makes his skin crawl, even though he’s known Shaw for years.

“Elvis, I’ve got her. Go. I’ll be down to update you in a bit.” Shaw’s voice is gentle but firm, leaving no room for question.

Elvis clenches his fists, his nostrils flaring.

Breathe. In, out.

It’s your voice saying it. He looks to you, sitting stock still against the pillows, staring into space, and realizes your voice is only in his head. It’s both heart-wrenching and comforting.

Finally, he nods curtly, then leaves his—our—room, shutting the door quietly behind him, resisting the urge to leave it open just a crack in order to listen in, to make sure no harm comes to you. But even in his current state, he knows that is overstepping. He forces himself to walk down the stairs, his mind churning.

After pacing the length of the house multiple times, beating himself up for his poor treatment of you, furious at your former fiancé for hurting you, and tying himself into knots with worst-case scenarios, he eventually finds himself at the piano. The only thing that ever truly quiets his mind is music. His fingers fly over the keys and he pours it all into the spirituals coming to him from deep within his soul.

God loves him best when he sings. Maybe He’ll hear his pleas for forgiveness, his prayers for healing—not for himself, but for you.

Lost in the music, he’s not sure how long he sings, but stops abruptly when Dr. Shaw appears in the doorway.

“Sorry to interrupt,” the doc says.

Elvis waves his arm dismissively. “How is she?”

Shaw hesitates. “It could just be a virus, but I took some blood and urine to test.”

There’s something he’s not saying, Elvis can tell. “And?”

Another pause. “I’m a little concerned about her…state of mind. I know I’ve only met her once or twice, but she seems withdrawn, almost traumatized. You said there was an argument?” He looks at Elvis with an undercurrent of judgement.

Heat blazes across Elvis’ cheeks, while guilt stabs in his belly. “I-I-I…yes, sir, but I’d never hurt her! And I-I don’t think…I-I mean, I don’t know…I think something happened t’her before we met,” he eventually gets out. It’s not his place to share your secrets, but damn if he’s going to let this doctor think he’s hurt you physically.

Dr. Shaw’s eyebrow raises, but he doesn’t press. He looks over Elvis with pursed lips and a watchful eye before his gaze softens.

“Can I go up and see her?” Elvis asks, almost desperately.

Shaw nods. “But she needs to rest. Stay off her feet. Eat well, if she can, and drink plenty of fluids.” Not run around after your ass, is the unspoken instruction. “Make sure she’s doing those things but…I wouldn’t press her.”

“Yessir.”

There’s tension hanging in the air before the subject is changed. “How are you feeling? Do we to have someone else step in until Ms. Cannava is well?”

Elvis grimaces, shaking his head. The last thing he needs is someone else poking around in his business, in your business. “I’m alright, sir. Probably could use a little R & R myself.”

Shaw looks at him with a critical eye. “Alright, son. Let’s keep it low-key, shall we? I’ll be back tomorrow to check in and hopefully we’ll have some answers.”

And with that, Elvis sees the doctor out.

He lasts approximately 90 seconds before he runs to the kitchen to fetch a glass of water and takes the stairs quickly enough that he spills half the glass before he makes it to his room.

“Knock, knock,” he says gently, opening the door. You are laying on your side now, away from him, curled in on yourself on top of the covers and the sight nearly does him in for how vulnerable you look.

“Doc said you need plenty of fluids, so I brought you some water,” he rambles, coming around and setting the glass on the stand next to the bed. “Can I getchu anythin’ else?”

You blink slowly, but don’t respond otherwise. His stomach drops. It’s unnerving, the way you’re staring through him at the wall, vacant and broken.

He can’t have done this, right? Not like this. There’s got to be more to this than a silly fight.

You’re a fuckin’ asshole, the voice in his head berates. He wants to disagree but can’t. But this isn’t the time for him to feel sorry for himself. Standing here being useless isn’t helping anyone.

What would Little Bird do? The thought snaps him into action. “Imma gonna just take off these shoes a’ yours, okay?” he says gently, not wanting to startle you. With care, he takes off your heels one by one, setting them on the carpet at the end of the bed. He wants you to be comfortable but hesitates to undress you, unsure if that would be crossing a line. But he can’t well leave you to sleep in the clothes you wore on the bus for near a day.

After a minute of indecision, he plows forward. “Alright, honey, I’m just going to help you out of these clothes, just down to your slip, okay? Nothin’ more, don’t you worry.”

You don’t fight him at all, wordlessly allowing him to move you upright and undo your blouse. There’s certainly nothing untoward about the way his fingers manage the buttons or how they unzip your skirt. It’s not the way he ever wanted to be doing these things, though, he thinks as he strips your clothes and pulls down the spread on the bed. You have no outward reaction to him lying you down and pulling the covers up over your body, other than letting your eyes fall closed.

He thinks back to the care you’ve shown him when he’s been such in a state, and it’s what gets him through the feeling of helplessness churning in his gut.

Once you are tucked in, he grabs his own pajamas. He’s got no urge to leave you or deal with the idiots downstairs. No, even though his mind is going, he joins you in the bed, attempting to read the book on his nightstand while worry nags at him. Eventually, his eyes droop closed and the darkness takes him, too.

*

You are a bit more responsive the next day, eating a bite of the toast and jam he’d brought up for you, but you stay in bed, eerily quiet and entirely too withdrawn for his liking. He does his damnedest to follow Dr. Shaw’s instructions and leave you be, but it’s nearly impossible for him to not check on you multiple times an hour.

Honestly, he’s not sure you even register his presence half the time and fuck if that doesn’t stab him straight through the heart.

Charlie and the other boys do their best to distract him, but he’s got no humor for the usual fun and games. No, he’s much too wrapped up in his own head, vacillating from wanting to punch his way through the wall and being so lovesick he feels nauseous. The only thing keeping him from totally spiraling is the fact you are still here and alive and in his bed. He hasn’t lost you yet, he doesn’t think.

He can’t lose you.

By the time Dr. Shaw arrives in the evening, Elvis is about ready to jump down his throat with questions. “Is she gonna be okay?”

“Let’s go upstairs, son,” Dr. Shaw says, in a somewhat ominous tone. If the doc wants him there for the conversation, the news can’t be good.

Elvis’ heart knocks against his ribs with each step closer he gets to you. You can’t be sick. He’s only just found you and Lord, does he need you more than he needs air. If he’s learned nothing else, it’s that.

Fidgeting, he lets the doctor in the room, following close behind.

“How are you feeling today, Lori?” Dr. Shaw asks, sitting near you on the edge of the bed.

Your usually bright and savvy eyes seem dull as you take the effort to focus on the doctor and his question. “I’m tired,” you whisper sluggishly, shrugging.

“Well, I think we have an answer as to the reason for that,” Shaw says kindly, then motions to him. “Elvis, why don’t you sit?” He gets up from the bed, offering Elvis his spot.

Oh, God, it’s that bad. His dinner threatens to make a reappearance, but he swallows the bile down, sinking onto the bed near your legs.

Dr. Shaw clears his throat. “Ahem, well, Lori, the good news is I don’t think you are sick in the real sense of the word.”

A wave of elation hits Elvis. Thank you, Jesus.

“You are, however, pregnant.”

The crest hits, disbelief slamming into him, taking his breath away in a whoosh.

“How’s that possible?” It falls out of his mouth immediately and without thinking, imbued with much too much innocence after his jaw hits the floor.

A deeply biological sense of panic washes over him then because it is most unmarried men’s nightmare, especially a man like him, to be blindsided by news like this. But his biology and his brain aren’t on the same level because it takes him longer than it should to reconcile there is absolutely no way this child is his.  

This isn’t technically his mess.

But the doctor doesn’t know that and peers over his spectacles with a raised eyebrow. “I trust I don’t have to give you a talk about the birds and the bees, Elvis.”

A flush of heat hits his cheeks and he shakes his head. “No, sir.”

All at once, the gravity of the situation sinks in. The bruises. Your fiancé. That fuckin’ monster. The slightly judgmental way Shaw is looking at Elvis because in the doc’s mind, Elvis is the one who got you in trouble.

Shit.

Finally, his head turns to you. Your olive skin is deathly pale, your icy eyes more intense than usual and shining with unshed tears as you stare straight ahead. Your fingers twist around and around themselves, something he’s noticed you do when you are nervous.

Elvis lightly places his hand on your shin and your eyes whip to his for the first time in over a day. At least you don’t flinch at his touch this time. Instead, his touch seems to ground you and he watches carefully as you come back into yourself and out of wherever your head has held you prisoner since he yelled at you yesterday.

Dr. Shaw looks at the both of you before continuing. “It’s very early days, my guess is—”

“Four weeks,” you finish, the pain of knowing exactly how long etched in your features. It makes his heart ache for you, and more than anything he wants to find the man who did this to you and make him regret he was ever born. But now isn’t the time for all that.

Four weeks is the same amount of time you’ve known each other, meaning this happened after he’d already met you.

How?

“Yes, and anything can happen in these early days, as you well know. I know this is a…delicate situation.” There is unspoken subtext in the doctor’s words, and while Elvis is piecing it out, you seem to understand immediately. The look you give him is heavy and filled with words you cannot say out loud yet. The silence sits heavy between you two.

The doctor takes his cue. “You two have a lot to talk about. Why don’t I come back tomorrow to do your exam and get you set up with what you’ll need going forward? Keep your activity light for now.”

You nod. “Thank you, Dr. Shaw,” you whisper.

Elvis stares at you, trying to psychically glean what you are thinking, but your eyes have shuttered and his own thoughts are going a mile a minute. It’s hard to focus until after he sees the doctor to the door.

“Doc, this probably goes without saying, but we need to keep a lid on this,” Elvis says quietly. He’s too much in shock to understand all the ramifications just yet, but he knows this world is unkind to unmarried young ladies who find themselves in the family way, even if it wasn’t their fault.

He’s got to protect you.

“Of course, Elvis. The same discretion I apply to you will apply to her, don’t worry son,” the man says, patting his back in solidarity.

He ignores the concerned and curious looks from the guys in the living room as he takes the stairs two at a time, his anxiety rising the more he’s away from you.

Skidding through the door, he grinds to a halt when he sees the empty bed. Frantically, he looks around the room, finding you in the closet.

“Little Bird, what’re you doin’?” he says, watching in disbelief as you start pulling clothes and throwing them on the bed before dragging your suitcase, which had only been put away yesterday, back out into the room.

“I have to go,” you say, deliberately not looking at him as you rummage in the closet.

“Go?” he asks stupidly. “Go where?”

“I don’t know…maybe out West somewhere. Canada, maybe,” you mumble, as if this a normal conversation.

His pulse thunders in his head. “What…no, why do you think you’re goin’ anywhere in your condition?”

“I’m not an invalid, Elvis, I’m pregnant,” you scoff. “I’m—” your breath hitches for a moment, your shaking hand revealing your true feelings no matter how calm you are trying to appear. “This isn’t on you, and I know you were getting ready to let me go because I lied to you, which I’ve accepted, but I had no idea…I should’ve known. And I thought I’d have more time to get ready…”

His mouth might be catching flies for how dumbfounded he feels as he tries to follow your rambling train of thought. You scurry into the bathroom and rustle around before returning with some of your things, which you dump haphazardly into the suitcase.

“I know you were getting ready to let me go…” circles round in his head a few times before it hits.

You’re running. And you seem to think it’s what he wants.

“Stop.” The command is low and firm.

You freeze in the closet for a moment before grabbing another armful of dresses, ones he bought you even though you insisted you didn’t need anything.

“Dolores, stop this right now and sit yer ass down, goddammit!” he raises his voice, pointing to the bed.

Finally halting, he watches a shudder run through you before you defeatedly sit on the very edge of the bed, your arms full of clothes. Refusing to look at him. He can’t tell if you are more afraid or ashamed, but either makes his heart crumble and the thought of you leaving has him wanting to break in two.

He sinks to his knees in front of you, desperately wanting to take your hands in his own but not wanting to overstep in your fragile state. He softens his voice like he’s going to sing a lullaby.

“Little Bird, I don’t want you to go. Why would you say that?” It comes out too pleadingly, but he can’t bring himself to care.

You blink rapidly, once, twice, processing his words, the unemotional mask you are trying so hard to keep on your face cracking. “You…you were so angry I lied and have every right to be! I thought you’d want me gone as soon as you found someone new,” you whisper.

“Honey, no—”

“And now, as if Gianni hadn’t already done his worst, now I’m…I’m pregnant.” Your voice chokes and the façade finally collapses as sobs wrack your shoulders.

Elvis can’t stand it any longer, sinking onto the bed next to you, pulling you into his arms. You go stiff for a second, resisting, but he squeezes, and you relent, your head falling on his shoulder, tiny hand clutching the fabric of his shirt like a lifeline.

Every quiet sob coming from you breaks his heart a little. He still doesn’t know you like he wants to but knows without a doubt you didn’t deserve to be hurt like this. You don’t deserve to bear the consequences of an evil man’s actions.

Gianni.

That was the name you said. Rage simmers deep in his stomach, but now is not the time to plot that asshole’s demise, no matter how much he wants to. Right now, Elvis has to make sure you don’t do something stupid, like leave him and run to Canada.

His shirt soaks with your tears. The damp sticks to his skin and should be uncomfortable yet it’s not. It’s proof you are here, with him, and he holds onto that.

“Breathe, baby. Just like you showed me—in, out, in, out,” he coos.

Sobs turn to sniffles. Your body shivers but fights for those slower breaths, your grip on him loosening as you seem to calm. He is lulled, too, his racing mind given reprieve for a moment, distracted by your presence in his arms.

Heavy silence fills the space.

“I have to go,” you whisper, sounding pragmatic and defeated, but calm. Peeling yourself from the cocoon of his arms, you stand abruptly.

He grabs you gently by the wrist, turning you back to him. “Din’t you hear me, lil’ one? I don’t want you to go. I-I’m sorry I been such an ass. I-I-I shoulda just asked ya what happened instead o-of punishing ya for somethin’ I din’t understand.” Desperation he’s unaccustomed to feeling leeches into his voice.

He looks up into your shining eyes, hating the warring resignation on your pretty features.

“Elvis…” you begin, stepping away, “you have every right to be angry but—"

“No, n-no…I mean, yeah, I was, but that doesn’t matter now. Please, Little Bird.”

You pause. “I need to leave.” You start putting things in your suitcase, much slower this time.

His heart cracks a little more with every beat. “No, Lori. You…listen, I-I-I’ll be a much better patient, I promise. I’ll stick to your diet and routine and all that shit.” He tries to make light but your face fixes in a determined scowl.  

You just shake your head resolutely.

Finally, he grasps your hands. “Honey, ain’t you hearin’ me? I’m sorry, so fuckin’ sorry, an’ I don’t admit that very often cuz I’m a stubborn ol’ goat, but I’m sayin’ it now. I don’t want you to go. So, stop this nonsense and talk to me!”

Quiet tears streak down your cheeks and you try to blink them away as you look down at him.

“I hear you. But you don’t understand—you’re not thinking, Elvis. I’ve got to go. I’ve got to go to save you,” you plead.

“What?” He can’t hide his confusion.

“I already put a target on your back. And if Gianni finds out I’m…he’s coming after me. Whether today or tomorrow or a year from now, I feel it in my bones, and I’ve put you right in the crossfire.”

“I can take care of myself,” he bristles.

You shake your head. “It’s not just that. Once the press gets wind of this—” you motion to your belly “—it won’t be good for either of us. If I go now and disappear, you’ll have a chance.” Your sentence ends in a whisper.

He blinks once, twice, trying to absorb what you’re saying. But all the logic in the world doesn’t change his heart. It doesn’t change how much he…

“I need you,” he admits, staring right into your eyes, unwaveringly.

Your lip quivers. “I can’t.” You look away before speaking again. “I’m sure Colonel can find you someone else who can fulfill your needs.”

Fuck. He’s losing you; you are slipping right through his fingers. Frustration fills him with frantic desperation.

“You ain’t gettin’ it, Dolores. I don’t need some other nurse, I need you, goddammit!”

His voice is loud in the small space, echoing briefly before the sound gets sucked into the sound proofing.

“Elvis…” you whisper, eyes going wide with questions he can’t answer, not now.

“Listen—jus’ listen to me, okay? There’s gotta be somethin’, cuz I sure as hell ain’t lettin’ you out there by yourself to get hurt by those goons. I’ll fend ‘em off myself.” His brain whirls, trying to see his way through the problem.

“No, Elvis, you don’t understand! This isn’t the movies! Gianni, my father, the famiglia—those ‘goons’—they are dangerous. Lethal. They’ll stop at nothing to get what they want. And if Frank knows I left, it means even if they can’t get to you physically, they can do worse to your reputation and your career—everything you’re working so hard to keep.”

Your face blanches and your entire body goes tense. “And if Gianni finds out I’m pregnant with his child, even you might not be safe from him. Oh, Madone, I should have never come here.” Green tinges your face and you bolt for the bathroom.

His heart races, slamming against his ribcage again and again. You paint a bleak picture, and your fear is contagious. But the fear of never seeing you again, of you being out there alone and in danger, strikes not only dread in his heart, but a protective fervor he’s never quite felt before.

An idea comes to him then in a flash, and the sound of your retching snaps him into action. Whether it’s terror or the baby, or both, it has you so in knots you are sick, and he can’t have that.

A few weeks ago, he may have been able to tell himself it’s because you are a good nurse, that he doesn’t want to train some new girl when you already know what you are doing, and that’s why he’s about to do something either wildly clever or wildly stupid. But he’d be lying.

He feels like he’s buzzing from the inside out with nerves, almost like the feeling he gets when doing a live show. It’s equally terrifying and exhilarating and addicting and maybe it’s God’s way of letting him know he’s on the right path.

Barely aware of how he got there, he’s in the bathroom, wetting a washcloth and crouching down next to you by the toilet. Not how he ever imagined this would go, but here he is anyway, brushing the hair off your cheeks. He’s so far gone for you, the sick doesn’t even phase him as he wipes your face.

None of it phases him enough to let you go.

You don’t want to look at him, he can tell, but you finally do, your ice blue irises vibrant against your bloodshot eyes, looking defeated and scared and miserable. But still beautiful. Always beautiful.

“Marry me.”

He says it with a quiet confidence only he could muster, despite the pounding of his heart.

You blink in shock, straightening. “W-what?”

“Marry me.”

“Elvis, you can’t be—”

He holds up his hand, halting her reply. “And before you say no, hear me out.”

Your mouth snaps shut in bewilderment.

“Doc said it was early. So, if we get married real soon—love-at-first-sight and all that—it’s still plausible to those without details everything is on the up and up, right?”

Your eyes narrow a little as you work through it. “I…I suppose so, if all goes well.”

A thought comes to him suddenly, threatening to ruin his plan, but he has to say it or he won’t forgive himself for not giving you the out. “I shoulda asked…I-I mean…there are other ways to solve this, less legal ones, but I’d pay for it if that’s what you want. I wouldn’t blame ya, considerin’ the circumstances,” he says almost bashfully.

It takes you a second to glean his meaning, your face going more ashen than it was already. “Oh. Oh, no. I…I’m Catholic. I don’t…that’s not an option for me.”

“Okay.” He nods, knowing he needs to continue, “T-There’s also adoption. I won’t force you to raise this baby, even if it looks bad for me…I-I-I would never do that to ya.”  

Your eyes fill with tears again, a gamut of emotions running through them. “I don’t think I want that either,” you say quietly.

The weight of that settles between them for a moment before he clears his throat. “Alrighty. I hate to ask this, but you said ‘four weeks’ earlier…so did he hurt you after we met? How—how long were y’all together?” It all leaves a bad taste in his mouth to ask, but he needs to know in order to make this work.

Your eyes close painfully. When you open them, there is resolve there, covering your suffering. “We weren’t. Not really. Gianni set his sights on me a long time ago, and my father…well, Gianni’s family is powerful, and Pop knew a marriage between us would raise his status in the famiglia. My mother didn’t want it, but when she died…well, I had to help raise my brothers, and I was too young, anyway. Then, I escaped by going to nursing school and managed to avoid him for a while, but…,” you take a deep, shuddering breath to keep going. “…but the day after we met in the hospital, he cornered me after my shift. He, um, proposed, and I froze. I didn’t say yes, but I-I was paralyzed, and he took that as acceptance. Then he brought me home to an empty house and…stole what he thought was already his.”

Elvis squeezes his fists so hard his knuckles go white. He has never been a particularly violent man, not finding pleasure in it like some men. Even in his bouts of bad temper, his anger is usually taken out on inanimate objects rather than people, but right now the rage he feels at Gianni is downright murderous. He’d like to rip this man’s heart out of his chest for what he’s done to you.

He swallows the bitter pill of his rage, though, tempered by the anguish in your eyes. A single tear streaks down your cheek and before he can stop himself, he’s cupping your face and pressing his forehead to yours.

“Never again, Little Bird. As long as I have breath in my lungs, nobody’s gonna hurt you again.”

You suck in air sharply, then your body shudders on your exhale.

“You can’t promise that,” you whisper tearfully. “I can’t ask you to promise that.”

“Well, I am, and you know better than anybody I don’ take kindly to bein’ told what to do or not do, so you better save us all the trouble and jus’ accept it,” he says, and while there is humor in it, he’s never been more serious.

He fights every instinct in him that wants to kiss your lips, instead pressing his own to your forehead, wishing he could give you some semblance of peace. Pulling back before he does something stupid, he gently wipes your tear-stained cheeks with the pads of his thumbs. You let him, and he supposes that’s enough for right now.

“Does anyone know what he did, besides me?” he asks, hating that he must.

“No, not unless Gianni told someone. I didn’t even tell anyone he’d proposed. I just went to work and then Colonel offered me this job and I realized it was my only chance to escape. I didn’t even say goodbye to my brothers in person. I’m so sorry I lied and put you in this position,” you say, voice cracking with emotion.

“You were jus’ tryin’ to survive, honey. No one can fault you for that. I’m glad you got away.” And he is, he thinks, as he smooths your hair. He nearly gets trapped in the blue of your mournful eyes before he snaps himself out of it. He’s got to focus.

“The timeline works out, then, darlin’. Even if people believe we did the deed before marriage, there’s no reason for them to think it’s anyone’s but mine. Gettin’ married cements it, ‘specially with this new, a-dult image Colonel is tryin’ to push of me.”

Colonel is gonna hate this.

“Colonel is never—” you start, seemingly on the same wavelength.

“I know, which means there’s gotta be no doubt in anyone’s mind this baby is mine.”

Your eyes go wide in understanding. You haven’t said yes yet, but he knows how logical and practical you are. He’s got to make you see this is the only way.

“Will Colonel believe it, though? He knows we—I—didn’t take to this arrangement so easily in the beginning.”

“We gotta make him. And I think you continue to underestimate my powers of seduction,” he jokes, wiggling his brow, trying to lighten the increasingly heavy mood.

You sigh. “Be serious, Elvis.”

“I am. It doesn’t matter what really happened, honey, it matters what people think happened. And I’m bein’ honest when I say it won’t take much for most to believe we fell in love and you fell into my arms. Or vice versa. My, um, reputation’s gonna work in our favor.” Heat flames his cheeks, which he knows is silly, but he plays it off with a smirk.

Your eyebrow quirks, but you leave it at that.

He rambles on, “And I don’t know this, um, family of yours, but I’m guessin’ even Gianni is gonna have a hard time provin’ anythin’ if you’re married to one of the most famous men in the world. I can’t imagine even the mob will try an’ steal ya out from under me, so to speak. Not with our ‘love story’ pasted across the world in black and white for all to see. It keeps you and the baby safe.”

You go quiet and still, and he can see the wheels in your head turning. “I…okay. Maybe, just maybe, you’re on to something,” you finally relent.

His heart jumps and he can’t help the proud grin spreading across his face from your almost-praise.

“But Elvis, this is too much to ask of you. This is your life. I know you had no plans to get married, at least anytime soon—”

“Plans change,” he throws back, quickly and a little too adamantly.

“Not like this.”

“Things changed the minute I got this diagnosis, honey,” he adds soberly.

You go quiet, as though with everything going on you forgot what you were doing here in the first place.

“I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking,” you apologize.

Elvis shrugs it off. But he doesn’t want your pity. No, he wants you safe, and he wants you to stay. And he’s man enough to admit this isn’t all for your benefit. He’s being selfish here, too, because, somehow, you’ve wrapped yourself around his heart and the idea of you ever leaving him fills him with despair.

You continue, “I hear what you’re saying, I do, but, Elvis, I’m afraid you’re not thinking this through entirely. You’re offering to raise another man’s child as your own, offering to marry someone who you don’t love…there’s no going back from that, especially when there’s a child involved.”

He swallows thickly, but not because he’s in doubt. Anything but. The image in his head of you smiling and laughing as he plays with the baby, of early morning whispers of love and sharing a bed in more than just name, of you helping fill the rooms of this damn mansion he bought for his mama with gorgeous blue-eyed children…it is so enticing and so close he can’t bear to think what might happen if you don’t say yes.

I love you.

And even if you can only give your trust in him to keep you safe and help raise your child and nothing else, he would still rather have you at his side and love you in secret than not have you at all.

God, how I love you.

If he let the words fall out of his mouth right now, would you agree, or would they send you running?

He can’t chance it. Not with the state you’re in now. So he steels himself instead, using the charm God gave him to get you to understand.

“Honey, I know what you’re sayin’, and it don’t change a thing.”

Those eyes of yours go wide, and he can tell there’s something you’re debating on sharing. A few moments pass while he lets you deliberate.

“Elvis, you need to know before…,” you trail off. You take a deep breath, steeling yourself. “This is it for me. Maybe it’s old fashioned, but with my beliefs, even in this insane situation, this wouldn’t be temporary. Gianni, my father…it’s possible they’ll never stop trying to get to me. And in my world, marriage is forever. Divorce is not an option. I…I can’t bear to think I’m the one ever keeping you from true happiness, from a love and children of your own. Instead, you’re getting a sullied wife who shackled you in a moment of need and who you’ll come to regret. I can’t have you regret me, Elvis.” Tears pool in your eyes and if he wasn’t already on his knees, he thinks this would have brought him there.

This is a tipping point, just like the moment the doctor handed him his diagnosis. Nothing will be the same after today, for either of you. God has a plan, he’d thought when you’d shown back up in his hospital room at just the right moment, and it hits him now—he swears on his dear mama—it was all leading to this.

“There’s no me without you anymore, darlin’. Who else is gonna take care of me? Who else can I trust with my life? I’m helping you and your baby, yes, but you’re keeping me alive, too. And you aren’t ‘sullied’,” he says with more conviction than he’s said anything before, his voice trembling with all the words he cannot say to you yet. He can only pray you see him, too.

The welling tears in your eyes overflow once more, and it cuts him to not know what you’re thinking, to think he’s the one making you cry this time.

“Don’t be sad, honey, please,” he whispers, begs. “I can’t bear to make you cry.” Unable to stop himself, he brushes your cheeks with his fingers, cupping one in his hand.

The way you lean into him is so slight he might be imagining it, but it’s enough to give him an ounce of hope, one he latches onto immediately.

“I’m not crying because I’m sad, not about you anyway. I’m crying because I can’t believe you’re willing to do this for me. You hardly know me,” you weep.

“I know enough.” And I’d do anything for you.

You close your eyes, dark lashes clumped with tears fanning across your cheeks. “Can you…can you give me a minute?” you say, not unkindly.

“Y-Yeah, yeah, o-of course,” he stutters, his heart fluttering nervously as he stands. Holding out his hand, he helps you up off the floor, making sure you’re steady on your feet before letting go. “I-I’ll be in there, when you’re ready.”

The door to the bathroom shuts behind him and he hears the faucet running. Waiting has never been his strong suit, which he’s brutally reminded of as the minutes tick by. He tries to sit on the bed, but he can’t keep still and jumps up immediately, running a hand through his hair while pacing the room.

But as much as he should be doubting his decisions, he’s not. He should be questioning his damn sanity, proposing to you like that—a woman he’s known all of a month who comes with more baggage than an airliner—but honestly, he’s never felt so sure of something in his life.

Sure, Elvis from five weeks ago may have sent him to the looney bin for offering to marry a girl and raise another (apparently very dangerous) man’s child, but that Elvis hadn’t been handed a death sentence and a ticking clock. That Elvis didn’t know his Little Bird.

That Elvis didn’t love her.

Hell, he’s much more worried you’ll leave out of some hairbrained thought he’s better off without you and get caught by Gianni, who he’s absolutely certain will hurt you in ways you never thought possible if he catches you.

No, Elvis isn’t scared you’ll say yes—he’s terrified you won’t.

He can’t begin to think of the despair he’ll feel if you disappear. Selfishly, he’s not sure he can stand to take another heartbreak, not now. It would be a cruel joke for God to put you in his life and then rip you away just when he needs you the most.

It makes him think of his mama and the gaping wound of her loss that’s only begun to heal. All Mama ever wanted for him was to be settled and happy, with a good woman by his side. He hadn’t understood why at the time. He’d wanted to focus on his career, to be free, to enjoy his youth and all the perks of his fame. But God humbled him right quick, first by sending him off to the Army, then by taking his mama. Since then, he’d spent too much time falling into the arms of woman after woman both drowning his sorrows and in the hopes he’d find the one to magically fill the void left in his heart.  

Yet all of it led a path straight to you. And there’s something serendipitous about it he can’t ignore, no matter how batty it all might seem.

So, he best convince you to stay.

After what seems like an eternity, the bathroom door swings open. Your color is still drawn and sallow, the dark circles under your deep-set eyes more pronounced than usual, but you are hauntingly beautiful. Silent, you glide your way towards him slowly, your face shuttered in that way of yours, giving nothing away. His blood thunders in his ears and he hopes you cannot hear it.

You stop before him, mere inches away. Anticipation itches under his skin as his pulse ratchets up. He jumps when you place your palm flat on his chest, right over his heart, the way he knows you do to ground yourself.

Well, hell, there’s no hiding now, not when he knows you can feel just how fast you have his heart beating. You’re probably counting his pulse and getting ready to tell him to relax.

But you don’t. You don’t speak at all. You stare at your hand over his heart and wait, but he’s not sure what for. It’s not until his lungs scream for air that he realizes he’s holding his breath. He feels like he’s going to float away and finds himself shakily breathing in. He knows you feel it. His hand covers yours, anchoring him to you, trying to prove he means everything he’s told you and so much more he can’t yet say.

Finally, your eyes raise up to meet his so intensely he might have been knocked off his feet if he wasn’t locked onto your hand so tightly, feeling his heart thrum against your palm.

“Lori—”

Your finger shushes him, pulling against the fullness of his lips. The touch is electric, zinging through every nerve in his body and buzzing around his chest. He doesn’t understand what’s happening until you’re on your tiptoes, your cold little hand pulling down on his jaw.

The two of you have kissed before, of course, but always for an audience, and even then, you’ve never once initiated it. So, when your lips meet his so softly, he’s taken aback with disbelief.

You don’t waver, however, through the milliseconds it takes him to recover his wits, waiting patiently until every sense in his body hums to life all at once. His heart swells and his belly tingles and then he’s kissing you back, as gently as he can, swearing he won’t be careless with you again.

He wants to devour you but doesn’t want to scare you, doesn’t want to ruin this blissful, unbelievable little moment where your lips are pressed so chastely against his own, using them to say all the things neither of you can seem to say out loud.

The sliver of logic still left in his brain tries to convince him this slice of vulnerability you’re sharing with him is likely nothing more than a show of gratitude, but his aching heart can’t tell the difference.

So there’s no helping the way his other hand falls to your waist, cinching there, pulling you closer. Your minty breath puffs against him in surprise, then he’s gently chasing your mouth with his, unable to stop himself—the hope of it all, of what could be, is too consuming. He can’t stop the way it blossoms through him, opening pieces of him he didn’t know existed.

It’s dangerous, this hope, but Lord have mercy, he can’t bring himself to care about the risks. Not when you’re in his arms like this. Not when he needs you like he needs oxygen.

This little kiss is like heaven, he realizes, because you are giving it freely. It’s not for show; it’s not begrudging or afraid. No, a kiss like this from you means only one thing:

It’s an answer.

A promise.

Or it’s a goodbye, you idiot.

The horror of that possibility squeezes his throat, threatening to choke him, but he pushes it away fiercely.

When the sweet kiss breaks, he finds himself winded even though he shouldn’t be, his head bowed and pressing into yours. He threads his fingers through yours over his wildly beating heart. Anything to keep you tethered to him.

Not one kiss out of the hundreds he’s had in his life has ever knocked him flat quite like this.

“You don’t have to do this, Elvis. You are offering me so much—too much—and I don’t know how much I can give you in return…I—,” you whisper, voice wavering.

“You’re enough,” he manages to get out, not wanting to hear the rest. And it’s true. God help him, it’s true.

You breathe in a little gasp of air, one that makes his heart flip. Then your crystal eyes raise to meet his.

“Then, yes, Elvis Presley, I’ll marry you.”

 *

TW: physical illness (fainting, vomiting), dissociation, Gianni and references to previous sexual assault, lots of cussing, unplanned pregnancy due to sexual assault, brief allusions to abortion

*

Thank you for reading, liking, commenting, and reblogging! It means the world! 💗

Taglist Pt 1

@eliseinmemphis@russian-soft-bitch@tattywood

@sassanoe@thella @suspiciousmidge @hiddlepiddlediddlewiddle@carolinesbookworld @juggernort @aesthetic-lyss @stitchattacks @donnamarie23

 @littlebitofgreen@paigevis@bugg06@xhannahbananax03@artlover8992

@18lkpeters@frozenhuntress67@girlblogger2002@kendralavon7@misspresley

@be-my-ally @whositmcwhatsit @vintageshanny @ellie-24 @thatbanditqueen @powerofelvis @from-memphis-with-love

 @precious-lil-scoundrel @stylespresleyhearted @prompted-wordsmith @crash-and-cure @elvisgf @lookingforrainbows @fic-over-cannon @godlypresley @ab4eva @whatstruthgottodowithit @elvisabutler @amydarcimarie@idontwanttoputanything @callieselvisobsessed @captainamerica1235-blog  @xenaspace3-blog 

@simplyamberj@claire-elvisgirl@everythingelvispresley@louisejoy86@deniseinmn @madelynpresley

[ladyloveandjustice]

The complete look of horror on Laios' face when Succubus Marcille is trying to kiss him is so funny. As is his immediate assumption she would be shaking in pure horror if she thought he was attracted to her (He Knows. Subconciously He Knows) and that Senshi would be deeply disgusted. Not sure where the second part comes from other than the idea everyone would find this pairing deeply horrible. Also that his immediate decision is to stab her and dump the body so no one can ever find out.

(And the famous "Izutsumi" gag BECAUSE SHE WOULDN'T GIVE A SHIT)

To be honest, I WAS genuinely a little worried Laios x Marcille would become a thing thanks to this part. I wasn't like, deeply gutted (this was before the brainrot had deeply set in and I was managing my expectations), but I was like "that's a bummer. hate the trope that the main guy and girl always have to get together. I liked their friendship a lot. I'm sure it'll be well written at least, but I really related to her as a lesbian and liked her with Falin. Oh well."

But FORTUNATELY I did not need to be worried. Especially since Marcille being here is actually just a prelude to what makes him TRULY SMITTEN.

okay Laios monsterfucker allegations may have been confirmed, but we're seeing what really gets him going is the idea of becoming a monster and all his friends also being monsters. Well except Izutsumi she's already part monster (Izutsumi).

We've seen a few times that Laios REALLY REALLY wants to be a monster., but he also wants to be with his friends and also have Falin be happy. So this hits him on all fronts (the fact Chilchuck's breathing fire and ice is clearly a reference to his consistently foul mouth). This is in part due to how alienated he feels from people, who often reject and misunderstand him.

The succubus clearly had to work a little harder to get to him, (which I think could support an ace/aro (or both) reading of him). Marcille's the member of the party he's closest too, so the succubus went with that, but it was a no sell. Marcille trying to (apparently) kiss him not only made it clear to him it WASN'T Marcille, he didn't get flustered at all. It was only when it went with "ACTUALLY I'M A MONSTER AND ALL YOUR FRIENDS ARE MONSTERS AND I CAN TURN YOU INTO A MONSTER" he starts sweating.

(hmmm I actually think it's possible succubus regular Marcille was leaning in to bite him, revealing monster traits so he wouldn't fight back, but he stopped it before the reveal).

And hey, since I've had obnoxious fucking people commenting on my liveblogs, glad the fandom getting bigger inevitably means more shitlords bothering me: If you want to think this means Laios had a little bit of a crush on Marcille and was just smart enough to realize Marcille wouldn't do that, that's fine too. I'm not your boss and it makes as much sense as anything else (though it really doesn't say anything about Marcille's side of things).But this is My Liveblog, and from where I am knowing the whole story, I just do not see it based on the text. Because regardless, and I will spoil this because obviously my reaction would be different otherwise, this does not go anywhere. Marcille and Laios do not get together in the story. You can ship them, I don't care, but don't act like it's "more canon" or some bullshit like that.

[theysaidhush]

⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒

Chapter 1: Animal Farm

Pairing: Stray Kids x 9th member!OFC

Warnings:

I'll say this only once, this is the only warning you'll get. Future chapters will contain lot of smut (eventually) angst and fluff. Heavy topics will be discussed (idol life y'know) but I don't wanna spoil it. This story isn't for sensitive person? I don't know how to put it. Just don't read if you think you'll feel uncomfortable!

This is a x OC but will be tagged as a x Reader. I find it difficult to write properly about a character while worrying about making it inclusive and fitting my story. I don't really care about her name or physical apparence though so if you have any suggestion I'm up for it.

No pressure chill under the trees. Updates will not be regular as this story is solely for my entertainment and whenever I feel like writing it. Means that I'll keep on posting even if I don't have any feedbacks but also means that chapter lengths will vary to very short to more words. You can have many chapters the same day, depends on my life, but I don't really like short chapter so ill do my best.

"I am not being a pain in the ass."

"Yes you are."

"You kinda are."

Minho sent a chilling glance to the boy who was curled up next to him on the living room's couch. It was enough for Jisung to shudder. But the topic was serious, he wasn't about to change his opinion just because his hyung was giving him that look.

"No seriously, you really are."

"Okay."

Minho smiled and kept on doing what he was doing on his phone, ignoring everyone's stare - Jisung's stare particularly. The younger boy was looking intently at him, he was waiting for something, something he was sure his hyung would do. And he did. Like three minutes after. He blew through his nose, still looking at his screen.

"Ah! I knew it!"

"I really don't understand what's the problem. Has she done anything to upset you? We can talk it out like adults."

The couple on the couch looked up from each other and Minho stared at Chan intently yet silently. The leader couldn't really tell what was on the dancer's mind, and it was upsetting him to no extent. Any other day he would have brushed it off as Minho being Minho. The latter was a great friend, he almost considered him his brother, despite not knowing on the tip of his fingers the boy's small quirks and habits. It was a Jisung thing. But now, more than never, he wished he could know him a bit more, he wished for the other boy to let him in.

"I don't want to talk it out with you."

"Minho..."

Jisung's hush whispers was not a warning, yet, it felt like one. He was not scolding his Hyung, he was just trying to appease the tension. Chan's face was contorted in what people would consider anger, but Jisung knew better. He was frustrated.

"This is about the whole group, not just me. I didn’t come to you as a friend, Minho, I'm here as a leader."

And it might have not been the right thing to say. Because Minho frowned, and retreated into silence.

"What a mess." was Jisung's thoughts, his eyes drifting toward his leader’s, whose head was turned toward a silhouette standing in the hallway.

"No. You can't do this to us."

"You don't have a choice."

"We do! It's my group, our group, we've worked so hard to reach our goals and create the music that will fit us!"

Chan did not know what was more upsetting at the moment; the fact that he was having this conversation while he was sleep deprived - he would blame himself for that latter, saying that it was the reason he couldn't plead their case better - or the fact that he was even having this conversation.

"They've let you do your things, you know that Chan."

"No, they gave up on us, so we had to fight our way to the top! That's what happened."

The word 'top' was a far too big word for Chan, but one he had to use nonetheless to prove his case. They were enough. They were just fine.

"They..." his manager sighed and pinched his nose. The situation was getting out of hands and even he could not do a thing about it. But at the the end of the day, his job was on the line, and he had a family to feed. "They threatened to disband the group if you don't agree to the term."

"Just fine by then! We'll go elsewhere and keep on doing music together."

"You don't understand Chan, think it through! This is not a GOT7 type of situation, they'll take Stray Kids' name, your music, your brand and all that you've accomplished by yourself, and if you do try to prosecute them you'll lose. I've read the contracts, everyone's contract. You can't refuse."

"I can't - " Chan laughed and sat on his chair, running his hands on his face. "This is disgusting and despicable."

"I know, Chan, I'm sorry."

"They just want to make publicity, it'll bury us."

"I know..."

It was a one in a life time opportunity, the young woman really and truly understood that. She was considered too old to even sit in that room, she was told countless times. Yet, it did not change the fact that she was sitting in that room. The room where all important decisions were made.

She felt uncomfortable, growing uneasy, fighting the urge to scratch her skin off - one bad old habit. Her choices, her decisions; all of those were flashing in her mind like a broken tape, image and pictures of the times she spent practicing to be here - not that much, if you ask her.

Those people stare - those important people's stare was making her fidget in her sit, avoid eye contact. Were they testing her? Waiting for a particular reaction, the one which could get her out of here in a matter of seconds? The room was feeling too warm, she will sweat buckets if she doesn't go out. Right now.

"There you go. Miss?"

They did not even knew her name. It was a bit disappointing, but then again, she was just another someone wandering between those halls, wasn't she?

"Athéna."

"A- Axina..?"

"More like, Ah-thé-nah." she corrected their pronunciation with a soft voice, continuing, "You can google it."

But their glare was enough for her to shut her mouth and look at the ceiling. It was a fool idea to correct them, they were older, knew much more things than her. It was a little unnerving, this whole elder situation was a lot to get accustomed to in South Korea.

"Axina. Have you read the terms and condition of the contract?"

"I have."

"Any reclamation?"

She wanted to laugh at their face, but she couldn't. She did not had it in her to do that. So she nodded, pretending to be genuinely interested by their answer, even if she quite knew what they would say.

"Regarding the whole part of you managing my...image. I'd like to know if it concerns my hair too?"

"Yes, obviously. And your weight too."

Freezing cold in her bones. Was it because the window was opened? Or was it their stares? It was chilling nonetheless. It was sending her back into a period of her life where she had looked at her reflection days and nights to get a glimpse of her ribs and be satisfied with the view.

"Oh."

"You'll have to work on your Korean too, your pronunciation isn't that good."

"What are you?" another one asked, shifting through the page of the contract she had signed.

What she was. Not who. Not her nationality. But what.

"I'm French, mister."

"Great, it'll help with publicity oversea. Are you fluent in English?"

Why was she having this discussion with them?Wasn't she supposed to talk to the manager and the team helping Stray Kids? Why was she sitting in front of JYP's shareholder.

"I'm almost fluent. I've learned while traveling."

"What a shame. If she was prettier we could have scored partnerships with French luxury brands such as Dior or Channel."

"She'll be perfect for the role that will be given to her."

"I guess so."

"We're done with you."

Was it an animal farm? She never felt that disturbed by a conversation in her whole life. She shuddered, getting up from her sit as she grabbed the hem of her sweatshirt to pull on the lose strands. She couldn't help herself but rock back and forth on her feet - another bad habit of her that some even called weird.

"And stop doing that it's weird."

Chapter 2

[queen-of-deans-booty]

Black: Final Part

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~1.9k

Warnings: canon angst and violence, extra angst

Summary: You're walking around with a new outlook for life. You're not going to let someone like Dean spoil your good mood.

Author’s Note: welcome to the first episode of season 10! i hope you love it as much as i loved writing it! <3

I do not own anything from Supernatural. All credit goes to their respective owners. I love seeing any and all comments <3

x

Dean walks back into the bar, leaving you outside of it. You take a minute to yourself before going back inside and finding Crowley at one of the tables. Dean took up a game of darts by himself.

"He's really starting to piss me off," you say to the older demon. "You're better company than that douche, and that's saying something."

"That's your husband you're talking about."

"Yeah, try was," you scoff.

Crowley's phone rings and he stares at the caller ID. It's one of the henchmen that he knows is dead.

"You're dead," he answers.

"Nope. Just using a dead man's phone."

"Moose." Your head snaps to Crowley when he says Sam's nickname. "It took you long enough. Your brother, his wife, and I were beginning to wonder if you'd hit another dog."

"My brother is dead, Crowley. I know you have some fucking demon parading around in his meat suit, and trust me, you are gonna pay for that. What, did you kidnap Y/N and use her for your own sick pleasure?"

"Moose. Moose. Moose. I'm afraid you haven't allowed yourself to dream quite big enough here. Your brother is very much alive, courtesy of the Mark. The only demonized soul inside of Dean is his and his alone. A wee bit more twisted, a little more mangled beyond human recognition, but I can assure you, all his. I didn't touch his wife. In fact, Dean collected her. Poor thing." You roll your eyes at his comments. "There, now. Feel better?"

"What about the Abaddon supporters you've been sending to kill my brother and his wife? How do they feel about that double-cross?"

"I don't think Y/N would care. If that's what you think is happening, then you're more out of your depths than I thought."

You grab the phone right out of Crowley's hand so you can speak to Sam directly.

"Don't worry, Sammy, I'm keeping an eye on Crowley's pet even though there's not much to look at."

"Y/N? Are you okay? What happened to you?" Sam stutters. "I went to go find you and both you and Dean were gone."

"You're concerned about me?" you laugh. "You're the one who's crying over losing your brother when I'm the one who is trying to keep him from killing people." You pause and think. "Well, try is a relative term. I couldn't care less what he does but when it starts affecting me, that's when I step in."

"What has gotten into you?" All you can do is laugh, and you hand the phone back to Crowley. "I don't know what is happening or how this happened, but I will save you and my brother or die trying."

"You know what tickles me about all this? It's what's really eating you up. You don't care that he's a demon. Hell, you've been a demon. We've all been demons. No, it's that he's with me and he's having the time of his life. You can't stand the fact that he's mine. He's my best friend and my partner in crime. They'll write songs about us and graphic novels called 'The Misadventures of Crowley and Squirrel'. Dean Winchester completes me, and that's what makes you lose your chickens."

"What about me?" you ask.

"You don't even want to be here, why would you want to be grouped with us?"

"True," you shrug.

"I am going to find you, I am going to save my brother and Y/N, and then I'm going to kill you dead."

"Well, that's the operative phrase, isn't it? 'Find you'. Good luck with that." Crowley hangs up the phone with a sigh. "I guess it's high time I come clean."

"Good luck explaining to Dean you're the one who's been sending demons to kill him."

"You're coming with me."

Dean walks to the bar to grab another drink when Crowley drags you over to where he is. He raises an eyebrow when both of you sit on either side of him. Crowley's confession is so boring and lengthy that you black out most of it.

"You sent those demons to kill us?"

"To keep you sharp."

"Really?"

"If it wasn't for me throwing demon chum your way, what do you think would've happened? The Mark needs to be sated. Otherwise--"

"Yeah, I know. I turn into a demon. I sort of got that six weeks ago."

"I'm just trying to help."

"You lied."

"Like you care," you roll your eyes.

"Who do you think you're talking to here? Does the tin man have a sheet metal dick? Of course, I lied. I needed to keep you sharp for our future, about which we need to talk."

"Our future?"

"Our professional future. How do I put this? If I have to spend one more night in this fetid petri dish of broken dreams and BO, I will cut off my own face."

"I don't know what you're talking about because I'm good. Hell, I'm great."

"Really? How many suicide wings can you eat? How many one-hit wonders can you karaoke to death? How many men can you beat down?"

"The deal was we howl at the moon; no time stamp and no expiration date."

"We've howled. We've bayed. I've watched you defend Y/N's honor countless times, all of which have been massively entertaining. I will treasure our Flickr albums forever, but now it's time for us to accept what we are and go back to work."

"Pass."

"Think about it, the King of Hell, Dean Winchester by his side, and Y/N." You shake your head and down the rest of your drink. "Together we rule. Together we create the perfect hell, and all of this that's bloomed between us never ends. We're not ending the party. We're just moving the party. Out with the club circuit, in with the stadium tour."

"I'm moved, really," you say in a bored tone. "Besties forever."

"Did I forget to mention I spoke to Moose earlier?"

"What?"

"Apparently, he's been tracking us for some time now. He got my text from the cell of that demon that you stabbed in blah, blah, blah. Too many words were spoken, and a lot of emotions were felt."

"He traced the call."

"My bad," Crowley shrugs. "I guess he'll be here by morning, the latest."

"You sold us out. Well, that's just lovely."

"I don't know what's going on with you. I truly don't, but I've had just about enough of it. Sold you out? Try 'doing you a favor'. Everything I've done for you for the past six months--the Mark, the First Blade, midwifing you back to life, offering you a seat by my side--has been a favor, a gift, whether you see it or not. Take the night. Decide. You know where to find me."

Crowley leaves you two at the bar and disappears into the night.

"Baby brother's coming," you smirk. "Are we gonna have a family reunion?"

"Unlikely."

Dean takes his drink and goes over to the karaoke machine to sing another song badly. The more he sings, the more he drinks, the more he gets irate with people. It gets so bad that when the security guard comes to remove him from the stage, he gets aggressive. Dean gets in one good punch but because he's so drunk, it doesn't go further than that.

You regretfully take Dean back to the motel room to let him sleep it off which doesn't take long. He's only out for an hour and then he's good to go.

"Who knew demons were such light weights," you comment and pack your bag.

"What are you doing?"

"Packing my shit. Sam is coming. I'm sure you want to get the hell out of dodge."

"Let's go somewhere, you and me."

"No thanks."

"Sweetheart, come on."

"Dean, I have been trying to plot my way out of here the second you stole me from the Bunker. I am only here because I have to be, not because I want to be."

"You could have left if you wanted to."

"Yeah, like you're going to let me go off on my own, fuck other men, and all that jazz, right? You beat the shit out of the first man you see who looks at me wrong."

"I protected your honor."

"No, you wanted to prove that you're the one in control and will always be the one in control. Talk about a head case," you scoff and zip your bag up.

"You got all that from a bar fight? Wow. You're good," Dean chuckles and sits up in bed.

"Dean, I've been around you my whole life. I know who the good guys and the bad guys are. Right now, I'm seeing a whole lot of bad. You know, the kind of guy that--"

"--fucks every skank in every small-town dive he passes through? Wow, you really do know how to read people because that sure as hell sounds like me."

You chuckle at his insult and sling your bag over your shoulder.

"You know what, maybe you're right. Maybe I am a skank, but it beats being a man who thinks he's the shit because he's got a cool-ass blade and the Mark when in reality, he's nothing but a loser with a shitty personality and daddy issues." Dean gets out of bed so quickly and towers over you but you're not intimidated by him. You stand your ground and look up at him instead of backing up like he wants you to. "Go ahead. Kill me." He doesn't move a muscle. "That's what I thought. You wouldn't have beaten that man to death and scared off every bartender if I didn't mean something to you. That's the difference between you and me, Dean. I don't give a rat's ass about you, but you still somehow care for me. Funny how that is."

You turn and leave the motel room, ignoring Dean's eyes on the back of your head. Dean lets this one go and packs his things before joining you in the car. You have your feet on the dashboard with your headphones in so you don't have to talk to him. Dean peels out of the parking lot and heads to the next town where Sam wouldn't think to look for him.

As soon as he gets onto the freeway, his phone rings. The caller ID says 'SAM' which makes him hesitant to answer it. He hasn't talked to his brother in six weeks but now is as good as any to do it.

"I left you an open tab at the bar. Knock yourself out," Dean answers.

"Well, hell, I just may take you up on that," someone Dean doesn't know replies.

Someone who isn't Sam.

"Who is this?"

"Me? I'm Karma, brother."

"On my brother's phone? Is he dead?"

"Not yet, and as long as you show up where I tell you to show up, your brother will be just fine."

"How do I know he's still alive?"

"Speak."

The man's voice is far like he's moved the phone away from himself, but Dean doesn't hear Sam. There are two pauses before the man punches Sam in the face, causing him to cry out in pain.

"Proof of life."

"Dean!" Sam shouts.

"Got a pen?"

"No, you listen to me. There's no trade. There's no meet-up. There's no nothing except the 100% guarantee that, somewhere down the road, I will find you and I will kill you."

"Well, that'll be a cold comfort to your dead brother."

"I told him to let me go. So, whatever jam he's in now, that is his problem."

"I'll be sure to pass that on to him as I'm slitting his throat."

"You do that because he knows me. He knows damn well that if I am one thing, I am a man of my word."

Dean hangs up the phone, tosses it on the dashboard, and continues driving.

x

Follow my library blog @aqueenslibrary​​​​​​​​​​​​ where I reblog all my stories, so you can put notifications on there without the extra stuff :)

[somerandomcryptid]

These sketches are an absolute mess but I want to talk about AiE!Sam so I'm afraid you aren't getting anything better right now :)

Now if you remember anything about the previous sketches I've done for a much more snakey Sam then you might be slightly confused but don't worry. That Sam is still intact. In fact much more intact then this one!

This is just the Sam that the character of Sam, warden of Pandora's vault was based on. But for the purposes of least confusion we will refer to the real Sam as Sam and the character as Awesam from now on.

Warning for mentions of murder and very vague descriptions of the state Sam's body was in when it was found.

Sam Isenberg was one of the early developers on Adventures in Esempi before his mysterious murder in early 2011 The killer is completely unknown as of now. But Sam's body was found in his apartment. Rather disfigured as well. But despite the torn up state of the apartment and victim, no traces of evidence for police to follow were left. Sam's life before his tragic end was quite full though. And he was a well accomplished person. Beloved by many despite how XD, his ex-wife and fellow developer on Adventures in Esempi describes him as quote "One of the biggest snakes I've ever met. He was the kind of guy who works with you for years and then turns without any notice or reason." This may have been referring to the fact that shortly before Sam's death he was filing for divorce and attempting to get full custody of his and XD's two children, a case left unresolved after the fact.-A telling of his life was supposed to be written out and published by Sam's son Dream. But Dream also went missing only 2 months after the announcement and the book never came out. XD still seeming to hold animosity for his ex-husband and never picking up the project despite being asked to by the public and allegedly his teenage daughter. But we do have some things about Sam's early life and feel it's important to share what we know. Sam was born in 1972 to two loving parents and lived most of his early childhood in Texas before moving to Florida when he was 14. This is where he would meet XD and live the rest of his life.-From our information he was a kid that got sick pretty often -a trait that passed onto his son-resulting in him tending to wear a face mask for much of his childhood and through his teenage years, though his immune system would improve in his 20s The first murder/missing case that would happen around Sam would happen in 1988 when he was 16, being a very close friend who formed a friendship trio with him and XD. The next missing cases that would pop up around him would be in his college years, a classmate and professor respectively His life would not all be dreary though! In 1994 Sam would announce his engagement with XD and they would get married the following year. And the following year after that, 1996 their first child would be born, Dream. From what we know the time of Dream's childhood and early teen years seems to have been a happy time for the family. Untill their second child, Drista was born in 2010 and well we've mostly covered Sam's short life after that.

And there's my man! He's actually so chill compared to Awesam. Too bad he's dead.

I do love how I am creating ships that absolutely no one will understand. Because I mean really.. Sam/XD is not something even I predicted.

I do love them though, just a guy/an extremely unhinged guy is a very fun dynamic

Plus I just love how much of an unreliable narrator XD is about the situation

Also I like their kids a lot.

I should really talk properly about ai!AiE!Sam/awesam though at some point. Because he's an absolute mess! There's just a plot point he features heavily in that idk if I want to spoil.

But I guess I've already spoiled a lot of stuff by even just talking about real!AiE!Sam soooooo oops

Anyway thas about it :)

@calamari-minecraft-corner

[teablogreal]

Code Geass: Roze of the Recapture Episode 1 thoughts

Okay so like, although I wasn't big on Akito the Exiled or the creative choices made with the compilation films, I was actually really looking forwards to this one. Unlike most people, I genuinely don't mind them doing more with Code Geass. Like we have the og anime just there, its out and people can watch it (except they cant because r2 is jailed on crunchyroll auughhhhh). They even made it clear that the new Code Geass stuff from Akito onwards are in their own continuity. Genuinely I don't mind them just expanding more on their already established concepts, though I do have a preference for when they do newer things with them. So like, yeah. Roze of the Recapture is my favorite thing to come from this series in a good while.

So for those who don't know, Roze of the Recapture is a sequel not to the original series, but instead the compilation films that recapped the original series with minor changes to the events that took place in there. It also follows up on the corresponding movie that conveyed what happened afterwards, but basically all you need to know is that after Resurrection, we have a 5 year timeskip. There is a new cast of characters who so far don't tread over where the original cast stood, however they do pay homage and parallel some of the characters from the original series. Honestly, I think this is the only part that has me worried, as I'd love to see them play around more with new concepts. However I feel like after the end of the first episode, those concerns are pretty much quelled.

Okay so I'm not gonna skirt around the spoilers any further beyond this point.

Okay. I want to talk about that fucking twist??? Because like??????????? I did not fucking see that one coming but its such a fucking great way differentiate your protagonist from just being lelouch again while also playing with parallels. We effectively have somebody who's a figure of importance who is thought to be dead, however lives on to take revenge on Britannia as they have wronged this person. Key difference is that our character kinda strays away from this idea. I know a lot of people here are referring to Roze/Sakuya as our first female protag for a code geass anime and I'm sure thats probably what they're going for. However my brain just sees Sakuya being legally declared dead and then proceeding to taking the identity of not an entirely different girl, but rather this whimsical boy twink named Roze. Idk, kinda transmasc swag but also I absolutely love how we've all been played for fools prior to release. Like all the marketing had led us to believe this was going to be a story about two brothers doing shit but WOW did they have everybody fooled (including me). A shame that the trailers for the later movies kinda spoil this twist but I will fight to keep this a secret as much as possible from my friends until I get them to watch this.

Roze as a whole is a lot of fun as a character, big twist aside. I love how he feels a lot more like a trickster compared to Lelouch. Even though Lelouch had a bit of emphasis on him playing with people (the orange incident comes to mind), Roze steps that up with his geass. I'm so glad that its not just Lelouch's geass again. They do something fun with it, like conceptually after thinking about it for a while its actually crueler than Lelouch's geass. Theoretically Roze could force you into doing something without brainwashing you, you could do those things while being entirely conscious. If you say no? Then whatever you're told to do otherwise happens no matter what. I think thats just insane, it really opens the doors for so many things to be done with it in the same way that we saw Lelouch's geass being used to torment Suzaku.

Anyways I think its really funny how people are realizing this one has Ichiro Okouchi coming back to write for it not through the writing returning to its unsubtle "no shits given" attitude from the original series, but by them having yet another chess game that failed to understand the rules of chess. Its a tradition at this point.

[valle-de-sombra-de-muerte]

Homestuck Reread: Act 2, Part 3/3 (p. 615-759)

Read the previous post here.

Time to finally wrap up Act 2.

John builds a tent which Rose promptly tosses out the window. Umm... based???

This is Rose's polite way of saying that she's speeding things along since John has mostly been puttering around up to this point.

How many times can Hussie write "listless octoroon" before the NAACP is notified? Seriously, what's his obsession with that phrase? Is it because it sort of borders on being a racial slur without actually being one, so he can use it to his heart's delight and not worry about being called racist? This is the same dude who made Team Special Olympics so I'm not that surprised by his sense of humor.

I'm sure this spurious anecdote of Harry Anderson accidentally chopping off some dude's finger might be amusing for some. I'm not familiar at all with him though, so this does nothing for me.

John's lazy ass sure isn't taking this whole "saving the world" thing very seriously. This is like trying to get your Sim to do chores but they'd rather play video games instead. If only this really was The Sims and she made him drown in a pool or trapped him in a room with no doors.

Rose has honestly been holding his hand the entire way, building up the path to the gate, and even killing most of the imps herself. This is really Rose's game and John is a pawn she has to nudge along toward the goal. I should really accept at this point that John is not the protagonist this story deserves.

Jade's silhouette is briefly teased during this flash where John is asleep. Hussie really wants to keep hyping her up for some reason.

Jade's conversation with John plays out similarly to the one she had with Rose. However, while Rose casts suspicion on Jade's eerie precognition, John is a moron who just goes along with whatever she says. She's straight up gaslighting him here.

Rose and Dave throwing shade at Jade behind her back, combined with the fact that neither of them told her about Sburb, makes it seem like she's an outsider in her own friend group. The way she's able to manipulate John despite the caution expressed by his other friends makes me question again why exactly she wasn't cast as a villain. The pieces are all there!

You know, Nannasprite is also selective about the info she provides to John, but it's explained that the sprites are programmed to act that way. The game intends them to be helpful little tutorial NPCs that dispense info but not too much as to spoil the mysteries of the game. What's Jade's excuse, huh? Is she an NPC too?

And she immediately changes the subject and John rolls with it because he only has one brain cell. I cannot stress enough that Jade's pesterlogs are the most aggravating thing to read thus far.

These ogres have been tailing John for quite some time. We've been getting occasional shots of them getting closer and closer, leading up to this moment. It's some good tension and buildup to what should be John's first big challenge in the game.

But instead of following up with that we go back to Dave for his confrontation with Bro. Okay I guess? I didn't mention it before, but it's a cute detail that Bro makes a reference to Dave's comic in his note.

This is a really good flash, all things considered. Maybe we can execute both fights simultaneously and establish some parallels between how John and Dave overcome their respective adversaries.

The Strider fight is interrupted so we can turn our attention to... the Wayward Vagabond. Oh yeah, there's a brief moment in the flash where it seems like we're going to pivot to Jade's intro, before we turn to WV. I don't know why Hussie keeps pretending like it's going to be so huge when she's finally introduced when all it's going to amount to is a kick in the balls.

Up to this point, we only really got to know WV through his use of the command console. I really did not care for his little "conflict" with John during this time. It wasn't funny, it dragged the pace down while these two butted heads, and it felt like an unnecessary addition to how the storytelling works. What is there to be gained by introducing these command centers where third parties can interact with the characters? If WV can talk to John, who's talking to WV? We had an established third-person, omniscient "reader" that could interact with all the characters, so I suppose it's supposed to be them. But that whole mechanic has become all but obsolete by this point.

Once again, this is not Problem Sleuth. This command interface doesn't work since the reader doesn't have any control over these characters. Hussie clearly had aims to tell his own story without user influence, so this whole storytelling device really shouldn't have existed in the first place.

WV's love of democracy and his desire to be a mayor feels at odds with how bossy he was with John. He didn't try to foster a rapport with John at all, acting more like the tyrants he very much despises.

WV's character is very erratic. He has delusions of grandeur, wishes to be respected and taken seriously, and apparently has no patience for the antics of others. He hates it when John is screwing around and also voices his displeasure when the "reader" inputs a command he finds to be nonsensical.

Yet he is also quite prone to silly behavior and quickly becomes a source of comic relief. This kind of unpredictable behavior can be explained later when we learn of the trauma he suffered on the battlefield. But looking at these antics through that lens does suck a lot of the joy out of them. It's like watching your senile grandfather playing with toy soldiers and reenacting the battles he fought in.

Knowing his backstory and how much of a tragic character WV later turns out to be, it's a little disheartening to see how the fandom at large treats him as this quirky little mascot/pet for the other characters. I don't have anything else to add to that, I just think it sucks.

Anyway, I don't mind the WV stuff too much, but I have to question why we're taking time to focus on him when we could be focusing more on the other characters' plots. This whole section is 91 pages. Surely something more productive could've been used with those pages before the act's end. Why couldn't this have waited for the next act? It's jarring to have this random bout of comic relief at a point in the story where important conflicts should be resolved.

WV finds a stockpile of Tab and becomes enamored with the drink. I don't understand why it's constantly referred to as sugary. It's a zero-sugar soda, so is that part of the joke? Tab is a really dated brand to reference. I don't even remember being it widely available by the time Homestuck was being written. So how many readers would be able to catch that joke? I don't think Hussie knew just how young his audience was going to skew.

Yes, WV's commands were a real waste of time. A rare moment of self-awareness by Hussie, even if I doubt that it registered with him.

It's worth noting that WV considers the green slime unappetizing, even though he previously ate chalk and uranium purely because they were colored green.

[S] WV: Ascend is the End of Act flash for Act 2. It's much grander than Act 1's flash in every way. Lots of great shots, and "Explore" is a really good track. It also goes to show how much more complex things have gotten since Act 1. While the previous flash was focused entirely on John, this one teases the cliffhangers for WV, Rose, Dad, and Dave's individual plots. This cast of characters is ballooning quickly and things are only going to get more convoluted from here.

Is it ever revealed who exactly built the frog temple when the meteor crashed on Earth? This was during the distant past when there wasn't even an ocean, so life didn't exist yet. Did it come into being on its own? I don't care for that.

Enter: Bro. Out of all the cliffhangers presented in this flash, this one is the most hype. Look at the imposing figure his silhouette cuts. You just know this fight is going to be big when we finally get to it.

Act 2 is a mixed bag. I appreciated Rose and Dave's segments, but John and WV's were a big letdown. The plot (or at least John's side of it) is moving along at a snail's pace when it really shouldn't have been. This should've been a big tonal shift where we leave reality and are plunged into the game's world, yet it's mostly trudging along at the same unhurried pace as the previous Act.

The Act should've been very straightforward. It presents us with a clear goal quite early on: John needs to get to the gate that's far out of reach. Okay, how is that accomplished? By John futzing around, arguing with WV, and occasionally fighting imps and collecting grist. Not exactly the most engaging means of solving this problem. And by the end of it, he hasn't even reached the gate! Nothing of note has been accomplished.

We learn about punch card alchemy and more about the cosmology of the Furthest Ring, but I honestly couldn't care less about this world building. It's all so expository and the story takes a great big halt whenever we have to read about it. Yeah Hussie, it sure is cool how you can craft items by combining their cards. It's also great how you made this chess society that's perpetually at war. I sure hope this has some payoff and isn't just window dressing to disguise how little the plot has actually progressed.

I was hoping this Act would lift my spirits and get me engaged with the comic, but all this meandering has left me discouraged. Maybe Act 3 will be better? Oh wait, that's the real Jade-heavy Act, isn't it? Oh fu-

Read the next post here.

[tokiro07]

Undead Unluck ch.187 thoughts

[Just the Way I Like It - Extra Crispy]

(Contents: immediate reactions, small Andy analysis, speculation)

Ohhh, the DNA hair isn't supposed to represent chromosomes, it's supposed to represent evolution! You know Tozuka did that on purpose. He wanted us to think she was Sex so we'd be surprised when she was Change. And from what I've seen, all of us sure were

But that's not the most interesting part of this chapter, not by a long shot. No, the most interesting part has got to be, without a doubt, Andy

As always, Tozuka provides us with a shot that's instantly iconic, this time in the form of Andy's charred body sitting stalwart on the barren surface of the extinguished sun. The linework and shading here is phenomenal, it almost feels like something out of Berserk. In the hands of a lesser artist, Andy's body might just be completely blackened with a barely recognizable outline, but here, even through all that ink you can see every contour of his physique, almost like you could count the individual muscle fibers. It's eerie, it's haunting, it's melancholy, it's beautiful, and to top it all off, it's metal as hell

Understandably, everyone is terrified when they see Andy in that state; they've only seen Andy in action for the span of about a minute, so they don't quite understand the extent to which Undead really works. Seeing someone charred to cinders but still shockingly intact like that would definitely be unsettling, especially if you aren't used to seeing death the way that the previous Union members all were, but being told that he's still alive through that? Knowing that the heat you're feeling on the extinguished sun, likely a fraction of how it feels normally, is the sort of condition he's been stoically enduring for eons and somehow he's still conscious? That's pushing eldritch horror territory

But of course, Fuuko isn't even phased. She's seen her fair share of the things that Andy's had to go through, and she knows that however hard it was for him, he'll be able to bounce back better than ever. Seeing Fuuko run up to hug him and thank him, telling him that she learned to live as she does from him, is so heartwarming and sweet that you almost forget that Andy's a smoldering statue

Now, the whole time that Nico was talking about Andy's sensory nerves and organs being fried, I was thinking one thing: he doesn't really need them, does he? He was able to move his body with his soul even through the effects of Unmove, and we've seen him moving his body while the sun's flames were active, so we know he has some way to tell what's going on around him, so why even worry about conducting sound through his bones?

The first answer is probably that Fuuko didn't know that or couldn't rely on it. Even if he could hear her through his soul, it's best not to take any chances and guarantee that her message is going to get through. Secondly, though, it's way more dramatic to shoot him in the head and jam her fingers into his skull. It makes a beautiful parallel to the events of the Spoil arc, it cuts the tension of the movement by being surprising and funny, and again, it's a striking image. Not even just the gunshot, but Fuuko having her hands on Andy's head while she talks to him, almost like she's holding his face but in the macabre and disturbing way that only UU can provide

My concerns were then answered though with Andy not only raising to his feet, but also firing off a brand new move: Soul Boosted Parts Bullets! Whether it can actually deal damage remains to be seen, since we've seen in the past that souls can only interact with souls, but Andy also created a soul chain to hold Change in place, suggesting that he's able to interact with a target's soul while its bonded to its body, much like how Ichico gained the ability to force a target's soul out. This implies that Andy can in fact deal damage with this move, even if only to the soul, which would arguably be more effective than harming the physical body of a UMA since they can regenerate any damage that isn't to their core anyway

Andy leveling up to the point that he can weaponize his soul like this, coupled with Enjin having solar-level control of Unburn, suggests that Tozuka is nowhere near showing us the real ceiling of everyone's powers. I talked about it in my response to @buhbuhlmao's post the other day, but there really is a good chance that, while no one's going to be able to solo Sun, everyone's probably going to be able to operate on a scale that would let them at least hold their own if they needed to

That said, Andy's new ability made me realize something: Victor probably wouldn't have been able to hold off the Master Rules like Andy did. While Victor never believed that his mind was a necessary part of "being alive," he also was stated not to believe in the soul as a concept, meaning that if his whole body were charred inside and out like this, he wouldn't have a mechanism for forcing his body to move anyway - he wouldn't be dead, but he also wouldn't be able to regain consciousness until someone brought him somewhere he could heal, and he certainly wouldn't be able to use his soul to suppress the Master Rules. Andy's ability to pull off such a feat proves that he's surpassed Victor, or at least caught up to his level by traveling a different path. Honestly, if we ever do get to see Andy and Victor split, I hope that we get to see them using Undead in completely different ways to show just how much of an individual Andy has become

To cap off this stellar chapter, we finally get a glimpse of our last five members (excluding Ruin and Lucy). Bunny, Tatiana and Kururu are all how I'd expect them to be, and Top is a bit older looking, but the real surprise is that Juiz is clearly younger. Not only that, she looks remarkably like Fuuko. Twitter user Junebug pointed this out too, that Fuuko and Juiz's positions and appearances have switched: Fuuko went from short- to long-hair and has become the leader of the Union, and Juiz has become short-haired and naively bright-eyed. The impact that this will have on their characters remains to be seen, but I'm super excited for it!

I do hope that meeting Juiz will allow us to fully understand the mechanics of the loop, though it's probably not super important that we get that. I just really want to know myself. Was Juiz always supposed to be a child/teenager in the 2010s, or did her soul hold her off for a few extra years? Also, she looks completely different compared to her child self before, is this because this is her first reset in the loop after getting transed as many have theorized? Oh, and could it be that Sex isn't the one who made Juiz into a woman, but Change? There are so many questions, and I hope Tozuka deigns to answer them all in time!!!

Until next time, let's enjoy life

[thewomanwhoboughttheworld]

Last night I finished watching Barry and, after having slept on it, I want to say something.

WHAT.

A.

SHOW.

I mean, if you haven't already seen it go and catch up because wow. It's only four seasons, eight episodes each, about 30 minutes each episode. I promise it's worth it.

Little shitty recap if you haven't seen the series: Barry Berkman is an ex-marine who comes back from Afghanistan and becomes a hitman. When he discovers theatre and meets Sally (a girl he falls for) and Gene (acting teacher), Barry decides he wants to change his life. Shit happens, the Chechen mafia is involved, he can't leave his life behind so he always finds himself in the darkest place.

Don't keep on reading if you haven't seen the show because I'm about to go and spoil it for y'all as I will talk about the last season and the last episode.

I get it, alright? I get why people don't like the ending. It's because it doesn't have a build-up or a build-down, it doesn't resolve anything, it's just... An ending. Just like in Bojack Horseman, when Bojack is sitting on the roof with Diane and she tells him it's just an ending. That's exactly what Barry's last minutes are. Just an ending.

We don't need something big, some action-packed gran finale with whatever you can think of. We already had that. We already had an adrenaline-filled last episode in past seasons, but it always meant that something else was going to happen, that the story wasn't finished. And you know what they had in common?

Barry.

Those endings all had to do with Barry. Barry killed Janice. Barry went on a shooting spree. Barry wanted to seek revenge. But Barry's not there anymore, so who else is going to keep on the violence and the blood thirst? Nobody. Not NoHo Hank, who is dead. Not Gene, who's in prison. Not Sally, who wants to get away from all of this and care for her son.

This simple and bitter ending is just perfect for the tone set by all of the series. It's a satire, it's sad, and it makes you want to shout at John not to believe in what he's seeing. But it's real and raw. It is upsetting, that's true, just as the whole series is because Barry's point isn't to comfort you. It's never been.

Furthermore, what else could we have more? Every character got their own ending, in a way. That's it, there was nothing more to say.

Fuches (my God, Stephen Root you excellent actor, how I hated your character throughout the seasons) served his time in prison and got what he deserved. He still couldn't leave his criminal life behind, but we see that he understood his mistakes. We can see it in his eyes when he brings John back to Barry. Don't fuck it up, kiddo, don't fuck him up. Will he keep on leading a criminal life? Of course, he doesn't know anything else. Will he manipulate another kid like he did with Barry since he was a child? Not likely.

NoHo Hank... Listen, I still had my heart in pieces from the Ineffable Divorce (my babies deserve so much more, I believe in the South Downs cottage) and now THIS?! I WANTED TO SCREAM, OKAY? Nohobal was so precious and the healthiest couple on the show (I can't believe I just said that about two criminals but whatever) and this is what they pulled? Bill Hader, I love you with all my heart but I'm never going to forgive you. But it's so incredibly in character for Hank because even if we see him as this sweet and polite guy, he always chooses violence. Ever since the first season, his answer was always violence, even if it was to protect Cristobal and their future together. We just see him in a darker place and I just-- That last scene with Hank dying and holding Cristobal's statue's hand is *chef's kiss*. Give Anthony Carrigan his fucking deserved Emmy Award.

OH. MY. GOD. GENE. Even though I thought he was slightly off the entire season, I think it's fine. We've always seen him composed and rational, but this season he just let emotions take hold of him. He was so scared and angry and just didn't know what else to do. I was so worried he was going to unalive himself with that gun but boy. He did it. He really killed Barry. I couldn't believe it at first but wow. And Henry Winkler, my friends, is the reason why NOBODY should be typecasted. He was so good and believable and overall GLORIOUS in this series that I can't believe the industry didn't see his talent back then and just wanted him to play different versions of the Fonz. But Henry darling, I love you so much but I can't look at that hair and that beard.

Sally's such a complex character it is really hard to break down. I love how we can still see her trauma, her abused and abusive nature. She's always true to herself, even if she grows and changes for the better. I love that she found a passion for teaching and decided to be what Cousineau was for her. I really think she will be a great mentor if she can let her ego go. I love how she understood what John would have done at his (boy)friend's house and accepted it. I think that, while in the car, she was choosing what to do next. Do I tell my son the truth, that that movie is bullshit and his father was a killer, or do I play along so that I won't fuck him up? That's what her eyes told me, but I may be wrong. But wow. Sarah Goldberg is perfect. Just perfect.

And now Barry... Barry, who I loved so much, who I believed in, who I rooted for. Barry who can't stop being violent, is a killer at heart, who can't be redeemed. He's unforgivable, he can't make it right. We've seen it in the past seasons when he couldn't escape from Fuches and the mafia and all of that, we see it now as he dies before turning himself in. It's mindblowing. Bill Hader is such a fucking genius and such a good actor that I don't even know what to say. I could talk all day about this series and this character, but I think this post would be too long.

In the end, great series. One of the best I've seen in recent years, one of my favourites. Thank you, Bill, for making this show come to light and being so freaking good at writing, directing and playing in it.