#we'd be dealing with constant consequences

[commissionsdarian]

Haha holy shit, we are so in the deep end

[noxtivagus]

i shld sleep oh my god

[threepandas]

Bad End: Winter's Victory

Cigarettes in this world were different. Odd, I guess. I had never really paid attention to the smell of cigarette smoke, before I ended up here, but I knew it hadn't been? Exactly... well, pleasant? I guess? Not to say that all the ones that existed here WERE, mind you. It was still smokey. The cheap ones an overwhelming incense. They called it "stepping out to pray" for a reason. You ended up smelling like you spent hours in a temple during prayer.

But the smell that lingered here? Clung delicately to cloth and the walls? It was more of a... warm spice. I could never place which ones. There was, yes, a smokey undertone, but? It more or less added to the complex almost taste scent of spices and tea. Dark and rich. Lingering. The sort of thing that takes time to develop.

The entire house was like that. Well, compound really. Austere and ageless, time did not seem to touch the inside of these walls. Did not seem to dare try. It was a blessed relief. A place of respite. All soft, dream-like edges and beautiful gardens. Meandering halls and tasteful, understated art. Peaceful company. Good food and tea.

A lingering smell of smokey spices.

My sister was up to her Protagonist shit again. It was... exhausting. I knew, intellectually, I should be back home. Playing my part. The ever supportive Big Sister archetype. Endlessly kind. Endlessly patient. Supportive to a fault. Smiling and smiling no matter WHAT bullshit nonsense that child pulls. No matter HOW she shames our house or causes trouble I must undo.

But honestly? I can't. I just... can't.

The idiotic little shit SLAPPED A PRINCE. Thank the heavens it wasn't one of the Emperors favorite sons or we'd all be dead, but still! Who the fresh hell taught her that was acceptable?! No. Just.... No.

Let Father deal with this for once. If he insists on spoiling and infantilizing that child? HE can reap the rewards. Her MOTHER can parent for once, instead of sitting around being generically "perfect". I am not there. This is beyond my pay grade. Frankly? I don't even HAVE the power to smooth this over. I could, technically. But not at any cost I'm willing to PAY.

Not for my sister's "she not like other girls", "oh? How interesting", fucking MOMENT.

No WONDER the Elder Sister character disappears in the later half of the royal route, only to turn back up in the palace. She's a freaking Consort! To a letch! Powerful one, yes. But STILL! And all just to protect a sister who not only doesn't notice? But doesn't even attend her wedding?

No.

ABSOLUTELY Not.

I lift the (frankly beautiful) cup of tea I was served to drink while I wait. Breathe in it's rich, soothing scent. Let the steam curl against my face as I stare out the open sliding doors at the fall garden. It borders on too cold for this... but not quite.

The tea is warm. The snacks are warm. I was brought a beautifully embroidered blanket to rest across my lap. Have a robe draped over my shoulders. It is... meditative, almost. Just me and the quiet sigh of vibrant leaves on the breeze. The world muffled. Warm dispite the cold. Ah... the garden really is... so beautiful....

I let it soothe me. Drain away my anger and frustration at the world. Running water, birds in the trees, insects. The silence is so wonderfully full. Alive. I have to keep my mind from bitterly comparing it to constant dramatics filled mess of the gardens at home. Focus on the here and now. This is NICE. Focus on this.

Quiet, near silent footsteps approach. Gait even and steady. Most men his age meander or shuffle, but like the home he keeps? Kaito seems almost untouchable by time. As though not even the Gods dare. I honestly don't blame them. He can be quite commanding when he wishes. Good thing he's rather laid back.

"Come to escape the treasonous?" A modulated voice teases. Wry and dry as salt mines. "Your fool sister is aware that actions have consequences, yes? Or has that idiot father finally succeeded in spoiling her back into infancy? Traditionally, we do not let such young children wander."

Kaito's voice isn't terribly high or husky and low. It is... smooth. Controlled. Like running your fingers across fine fabric. I could honestly listen to him read a phone book and be pleased. He would have made a killing as a voice actor, in my first life. Or reading audio books. Something.

"No retort? Witty defense? Oh dear. You are exhausted, aren't you, my friend?" He noted, dropping the teasing edge. Stepping inside the viewing room and calmly sliding the door shut behind him, I could almost feel him observing me. "When was the last time you slept? Properly. You're a mess, my friend, look utterly exhausted. Has it become that bad?"

Worse actually. They keep doubling down. Doing stupid "girl power!!!1!", poorly thought out, works in a 21th century DEMOCRACY but sure as shit NOT HERE, so called "power moves". I was? So, so fucking tired. Legitimately scared for the servants at this point. Because, honestly? Let stupid reap it's own reward. I TRIED. I was dismissed and ignored. Taken for granted.

Accused of JEALOUSY!

Like? Oh, HELL NO. I know exactly where THAT train of thought ends. I've read enough of the Genre to cut THAT shit off at the pass. Not Today, Satan!

So? Fuck um. I Tried. But I REFUSE to set myself ablaze to keep the ungrateful warm. Especially when they have both coats and just want to roast marshmallows. But... the SERVANTS? They are innocent. Wrong house, shit masters. Half are basically indentured! Much to my outrage.

We HAVE the funds to pay them better. But do I control those funds? Dispite doing ALL THE WORK? Managing the House? No. Of course not. THAT would be Protagonist's mother. And we really need that money for more jewelry and pretty outfits for her daughter. Fuck the household, I guess.

Things are... likely to get bad.

Because I have made the painful, painful choice? To let GO.

I can't keep holding up the house. I am NOT Atlas. Was not granted a second chance, just to throw it away. But at the same time? The servants. Not the enabling, vindictive, lapdogs that circle my family like vultures. The ACTUAL servants. Gardeners, cooks, maids. The no one's that they will not remember.

Somebody has to protect THEM. It must be me. Or no one else WILL.

I'm hoping Kaito will help.

Please, heavens, let this be enough to help. Then... THEN I can figure out how to protect myself. Hopefully. Maybe. Though I am probably running quickly out of time.

"Dear one, are you with me? You are drifting. I need you to come back. Focus on me. The sound of my voice. Can you hear me? Do you see the leaves? Focus on their color. See the reds and yellows beyond them. Like fire, is it not? Can you smell the tea? Dear one, what kind is it? Come here. Back to your body. That's right..."

Smooth and soothing. Closer then what felt like a blink ago. Huh. Yes. The leaves are quite lovely, aren't they? And... and this is red cliff, first harvest, right? Ah. I'm still so bad at telling certain types of tea apart. How mean. He knows this.

.....my brain feels mushy. But back in my body. I manage to scrounge up the edges of a smile. Gods, I am so tired. Worn so thin. But I... I can't rest. Not yet. Kaito kneels beside me, too dignified and reserved to show the full weight of his concern. But it practically howls from his body language. The sheer closeness he has allowed. I must have truely scared him there.

I would tease him, about using my notoriously bad memory of frankly near identical teas against me... but I just... just can't.

There isn't enough energy left in me. I think the soothing nature of his home, his company, has been my undoing. My brain has finally declared me safe enough to break down. Ha ha... perhaps that is why I've been avoiding coming here for so long. I knew I would break down. Would not want to leave.

Unspeakably rude of me.

"The rumors have not done the situation justice, it seems. You seem at your wits end. My dear, you cannot continue like this. Please, let me help. I realize it is overstepping any number of boundaries... but..." the weight of his concern; the words he was struggling to find, to phrase the unkind more palatably, hung between us. "Please, my friend. You are struggling. I can not bear it."

I felt exhausted tears well up. Days of being overwhelmed. Threatened on all sides. Wondering if today would be the day, that the royal gaurds kicked down our gates and executed us all. Struggling against the blindly arrogant and willful actions of my family. The very SAME family that treated me as more of a secretary then as any kind of kin.

Where would I be? If I had not met Kaito, all those years ago? Visiting his cousin, who was marrying a friend of my cousin. Even then, I was desperately trying to keep the name of our family from being filth. My father could not tear himself away from the whims of my sister or his pretty new wife. My grandmother somehow uncaring, tyrannical and doting, indulgent and yet strict.

I was the ONLY ONE who could and WOULD bother to represent us.

Was called frivolous and silly for it. For "seeking parties" to go "play at". As though it was not stressful. As though it was not far beyond my training and skills. Only the concerned eyes of cousins from other houses and guidance of matriarchs from BETTER houses, let me survive at ALL.

Grandmother still does not understand why she no longer gets invitations. Why her name is mud in the eyes of other elders. They did not take kindly, to her abandoning her granddaughter to do HER and HER DAUGHTER-IN-LAW'S job for them. But... there I was. Doing my best. Decorated like a little doll, uncomfortable and quite.

Kaito didn't even need to speak to me. Would never have approached such a nervous, unchaperoned child. Forget being simply a young unmarried girl. I was quite LITERALLY a girl. A child. He never would have so much a acknowledged my existence normally. It simply wasn't done. He was after all, an unmarried man of considerable power.

Still is.

But he needed to speak with his cousin. Who, quite rudely, would NOT take a hint. Too wrapped up in his new bride. Thus forcing Kaito to come over. Bless him, he still tried to politely ignore me. So as not to put pressure on a nervous child. But, once again, Cousin Dense As A Brick struck. Introduced us before merrily swanning off to go talk with friends, taking his wife, my cousin, and ONLY CHAPERONE with him.

We were both baffled and aghast. Horrified. It was the sort of gods awful that somehow found its way back around to being funny. Granted, only because we were in a highly visible location surround by other part goers. But still. Why don't you just? Pick me up and dump me in his LAP next? Good gods man.

Needless to say? The roasting was merciless and immediate. He escorted me to a friend of his. Terrifying woman. We had a grand time roasting terrible behavior and I learned SO MUCH. They were Hilarious. Clearly appreciated having an audience who could actually grasp their sense of humor. I left with letter buddies.

Acquaintances that became friends.

Kaito became my single BEST friend. A refuge, a mentor, a confidant. I trusted... TRUST, the man more then any single soul I've ever met. It helps, I guess, that he meets me where I AM not where he assumes I SHOULD be. Doesn't baby me. Infantalize me. Nor does he treat me in any way that would set off a "creep" alarm in my head. He's just... Kaito.

All cunning eyes and slight smiles, dry humor and cutting wit. Ever the rougish yet refined strategist. Bad boy of the highly polite. All the high court ladies still sigh over him.

Grey eyes that bordered on black filled my vision. That whisp of soft silver hair that never wanted to stay put, forever falling across his brow. My view of the garden cut off. When had he moved? Had I drifted back into my head again? It seemed so.

This close, I could not help but notice his eyelashes were still the rich dark of his youth. Few strands of silver yet touching his eyebrows. He'd had a beautiful shade of black hair it seems. It was rather striking....

A pinch on the back of my hand. Bright pain lancing through the fog. Kaito's hands cupped mine, kept me from jostling my cup. Stopping me from dropping now cold tea into my lap. Taking it from me gently, he set it aside. Thumb rubbing the skin he had abused. His face was apologetic.

"And that marks the second time you've drifted away on me, dear. I'm afraid I'm no longer asking. I'm will be helping. This is entirely unacceptable. What in the gods name have those idiots done to you?" His voice was soft. Attention focused on me. I felt... felt so very fragile.

Not weak. Fragile. Like glass under strain. Bones near their breaking point. That final support beam struggling with weight beyond its abilities to bear. He was treating me like I was wounded. Was I? Perhaps I was. I certainly felt that way.

I just... just wanted someone ELSE to take care of it all.

Just for a bit.

Was that so wrong?

I was TIRED. Felt the tears coming back. Here I was, coming to a dear friend, about to ask him to take on a burden for me. Risk enraged royalty just to protect the innocent. Being unspeakably emotional and RUDE. And I... and I... I just....

"Shhhhh. None of this. You've done so much. Have been so, so brave, my girl. No more. It's alright. I'm here. I'll take care of everything." He soothed. Soft and unbearably kind. All I could do was nod. Agree. "There we are, good girl. You'll stay here for now, all right? No more stressful journeys to that house. I'll send someone to gather your things. We can have everything dealt with after a rest."

His hands, boldly, came up to cup my cheeks. I found I didn't care. It felt nice. His palms warm and dry, gently cradling.

I wouldn't be able to stay. He knew that. I knew that. It simply WAS. We weren't related, weren't married. I had brought no chaperone. I... gods, I wanted too. Badly. But I couldn't. I just needed help with the servants. Told him as much. Words rambled disjointedly between us as I struggled to get them all out.

"Ah, but the solution then is simple, isn't it?" He said, looking almost amused. "You just need to marry me."

Blinking, the thought didn't quite process. My confusion clear enough on my face for him to continue.

"Every time I see you, you are suffering some fresh new indignity from that house. Some brand new insult. Isn't it better here? I know you enjoy it. The servants adore you. I adore you." The hands on my cheeks shifted, just slightly, barely daring to let their thumbs stroke just slightly."

"I would give you everything, dearest."

This... did not feel political. Nor some ploy to just protect the servants, offered by a dear friend. When... when had things changed? I knew for a fact, he held no such interests in me as a child. I'd seen him kill a man over the mere suspicion of such things. Yet... it's also not like I'd grown UP in front of him. We talked mostly over letters.

It was harder to remember my physical age through those. Since I didn't exactly talk or write like the child I had appeared. And talking to each other, being friends with each other, for going on a decade... certainly WAS a good foundation for a relationship, wasn't it? I didn't know any more. How old... how old even was I?

His hands were so warm.

Felt strong and reliable, cupping my face. A reserved and refined (if a bit mischievous), pillar of strength that I could finally lean on. Offering up a tempting dream world where I wouldn't have to think anymore. Wouldn't have to deal with troubles or reality. Just... just endless, beautiful, painting-like peace and serenity.

No more drama... ever again.

Wouldn't that be nice?

Didn't I deserve to rest?

Who else, really, could I even see myself marrying? Realistically? Some untested lout? Character suspect and temperament unknown? What prospects, what LOYALTY, could they even offer? Would they even respect my boundaries? Could they ever hope to match his knowledge of my likes and dislikes? Could... could I ever hope to TRUST them? Like I did, Kaito?

I felt my expression soften. Decided to be a little bold too. Leaning forward, I let my hands come up to lightly grip his arms. Still so corded with muscles. The man never did skip out on his training, be it archery or swordsmenship. My forhead rest lightly against his, that wayward strand tickling my skin just a bit. His breath smelled of those smokey spiced cigarettes while his skin, which I had never dared take note of, smelled of daily things.

He held so perfectly still, as though afraid to spook me. Seemed startled by my boldness. How cute~

I couldn't stop the grin if I tried.

"Yes, yes, mock the old man. Impertinent minx. So scandalous!" He teased, finally unfreezing after gathering his thoughts. That plotting spark back in his eyes. "Whatever shall I do? My guest takes advantage of me! Oh dear, oh no~ I fear for my honor! You will have to make an honest man of me, I'm afraid."

The laugh burst out of me, feeling a lot like relief. Gods, I'd missed this. Just... just sass and light hearted teasing. Droll humor and wit. No nightmare politics or angry royals. No trying to manage the unmanageable. Not responsible for any but myself. Yes... yes this was exactly what I needed, wasn't it?

Honestly? FUCK the Plot. FUCK the Protagonist and her nightmare social blunders! I was gonna get OUT of that house. Live for ME. Marry a nice, reliable man. Have a beautiful home. Maybe get some pets. Eat snacks! Laze about and enjoy the gardens! Have some gods damned PEACE for once! It sounded perfect.

I told Kaito there were no take backs. Congratulations on the terrible idea! I was HIS problem now. Have fun with your new, future in-laws!

Laughter was the best thing I'd felt in weeks. One of the maids I liked was already on standby and ready to lead me to a guest room. We bickered light heartedly, him groaning in exaggerated ways about his TERRIBLE fate of having to deal with IDIOTS! Oh, Darling, how COULD you?! Ha! Suffer.

It... gods, it was beautiful. Dreamlike. A perfect, story book solution to my woes.

Really, if I did not TRUST Kaito so much? I would have been suspicious.

But I did.

So I left with the maid, a smile on my face. Relieved. Happy. Engaged to a "good man". The most TRUSTWORTHY man I knew.

Thus, did not see, like a mask, his expression slide away. His open body language close off, like then slamming of a crypt door, locking the dead back inside. The warmth draining from the room as I left it, as though I had taken every trace with me. Leaving only the cold, cold THING behind. One that wore the face of a man.

A handsome man, yes, but an empty one.

One that was Not Pleased.

"I distinctly recall," his voice cutting the silence like an assassin slitting a throat, sudden and violent yet just as impersonal. "That I ordered her not to be bothered. For you to get rid of that... thing, in a timely manner."

Shadows dropped from the roof. Then too their knees. Kneeling, loyal unto death, before the one that commands them. Many are injured. They do not shake, for all that they have failed. Will likely die for it.

"Give me one good reason to let you live. A single one." The empire's spy master, the Winter Ghost, asks the room at large. Picking up his beloved's tea cup, considering it as he talks. He almost wants to destroy it. So no one else can ever use it. Touch it with their filthy hands. "Well?"

His assassins continue to kneel. Silent. There is no defense for their failure.

Three die instantly, the rest are not so lucky.

He decides to keep the cup.

Running his thumb along the rim where her mouth touched it, he steps out, closer to the garden and slides the door shut. It truely is a lovely view. Behind him, his servants behind the familiar work of cleaning up. Kneeling in the dirt before him, the next set of assassins.

"Let me make my self clear this time. I don't care how you do it, how painful or how slow, but they are to be gone by the time I am wed, understood? If that useless chit or her idiot father darken my door, you will long for the mercy that is death. Get out. And do not DARE fail me."

A quite chorus of confirmation, then like leaves... scattered on the wind.

He was named winter victory. For his mother's success in seizing control of her poor, late, husband's house. Born into the cold, it has always remained. Is it any suprise he covets warmth? In any form he can have it. Every form.

A pity though... that he won't be needing his plans.

She would have made a beautiful widow.

[howieabel]

“This was a talk to an anarchist conference, and in my view the libertarian movements have been very shortsighted in pursuing doctrine in a rigid fashion without being concerned about the human consequences. So it's perfectly proper… I mean, in my view, and that of a few others, the state is an illegitimate institution. But it does not follow from that that you should not support the state. Sometimes there is a more illegitimate institution which will take over if you do not support this illegitimate institution. So, if you're concerned with the people, let's be concrete, let's take the United States. There is a state sector that does awful things, but it also happens to do some good things. As a result of centuries of extensive popular struggle there is a minimal welfare system that provides support for poor mothers and children. That's under attack in an effort to minimize the state. Well, anarchists can't seem to understand that they are to support that. So they join with the ultra-right in saying "Yes, we've got to minimize the state," meaning put more power into the hands of private tyrannies which are completely unaccountable to the public and purely totalitarian.

It's kind of reminiscent of an old Communist Party slogan back in the early thirties "The worse, the better." So there was a period when the Communist Party was refusing to combat fascism on the theory that if you combat fascism, you join the social democrats and they are not good guys, so "the worse, the better." That was the slogan I remember from childhood. Well, they got the worse: Hitler. If you care about the question of whether seven-year-old children have food to eat, you'll support the state sector at this point, recognizing that in the long term it's illegitimate. I know that a lot of people find that hard to deal with and personally I'm under constant critique from the left for not being principled. Principle to them means opposing the state sector, even though opposing the state sector at this conjuncture means placing power into the hands of private totalitarian organizations who would be delighted to see children starve. I think we have to be able to keep those ideas in our heads if we want to think constructively about the problems of the future. In fact, protecting the state sector today is a step towards abolishing the state because it maintains a public arena in which people can participate, and organize, and affect policy, and so on, though in limited ways. If that's removed, we'd go back to a [...] dictatorship or say a private dictatorship, but that's hardly a step towards liberation.” ― Noam Chomsky, Chomsky On Anarchism

[theocddiaries]

"They can't order me to stop dreaming" or Why Cinderella isn't weak or a bad role model

Cinderella, as the other clasicall princesses, has been so overlooked. Sure, she doesn't stop a war like Pocahontas, saves her country like Mulan, saves her prince like Ariel and Belle, puts her foot down fiercely like Jasmine or confronts her abuser like Rapunzel did.

Which helps me elaborate my point: Rapunzel was able confront Mother Gothel because she has had growth outside her tower - where she has spent her 18 years of life, under narcissistic abuse and constant gaslighting - she has met many different people throughout her journey. She has seen thieves that were more than met the eye, has been treated kindly by Flynn, has had Pascal through thick and thin and was able to fulfill her dream of watching the lights first-hand. And later on, she could grow even more because she had her true parents, who loved her and never stopped believing she could come back to them.

Cinderella… Couldn't do as much (at least in the original 50's film, in the third one, she snapped at the stepmother and stood up to her).

Let's see what her life has been like: she had a loving mother, until she didn't. She had a loving father, until she didn't. And the only family she has left is an evil woman who has poisoned her biological daughters into believing their stepsister is the devil just because she was physically attractive. I dare to say she even envied the love Cinderella was given by his father, which meant 'less love' reserved for her, the wife. (Yes, it's sad, but there are parents like that).

So, Cinderella was left, from a very young age, to deal with solitude and ostracism in her own home. Her father remarried so she could have a loving mother, because he felt she missed a femenine figure in her life, and he chose wrong because abusers are just like that: they're chamaleons that won't show their true colours until they have you under their control. She can't count on her sisters because Tremaine has made sure to break the relationship even before it could be built.

The only things she has is her mice/birds friends and her dreams. She can't abroad these issues properly because of the time period and the lack of support system at home. How many children have gone through this? How many young and full-grown adults are dealing with the awful consequences of such upbringing - and even worse?

I didn't even realised I was verbal/emotional/mentally abused and neglected until very recently. And that's with the progress psychology has had in the last years. It's easy to judge actions of a past period with present eyes. We don't know what we'd have done had we been in that same situation in that time period, and being a woman, no less.

But coming back to Cinderella, I think she is one of the strongest princesses there is, not because she has done any of the brave things the princesses mentioned at the beginning of this rant had had in their movies, due to different backgrounds and personality traits. She could've turned bitter, mean, envious and cold-hearted, and instead, she remained good. That takes true courage. To still be good and see the good in people even when the ones who were supposed to take care and shelter you were the ones to bring pain upon you in the first place. Our homes and families, indirectly, shape the way we will perceive the world once we grow up and go into the real world. Since little, she has received nothing but dismissiveness, indifference and abuse, and yet, she never stops smiling, never stops believing, never stops dreaming.

Which lead us to a scene I think people overlook due to the famous song that comes afterwards. After her stepsisters ripped her dress - the last thing she has of her biological mother, mind you - so she can't go to a ball that was for everyone in the kingdom, she just breaks. Understandably so. (Which reminds me that she never wishes for a man or anyone to save her from her situation, at least, she wasn't vocal about it, but I'm sure she thought of it like anyone who has felt so alone, abused and hopeless, and there's nothing wrong with that. You have to do that before you realise you were strong all this time along). Seeing the shreds her late mother's dress is now, by the hands of her stepsisters, due to her stepmother's venomous tongue, is just too much for her.

She runs out and cries her eyes out, claiming that now "she doesn't believe in anything." And yet… her godmother appears, consoling her, replying: "If you truly didn't believe in anything, I wouldn't be here."

That right there, is the main example of Cinderella's true character and why she's so strong and why Tremaine wanted to make her forget about it: even when you stomp on her, repeatedly, relentlessly and mercilessly… She will always have some spark inside her, some voice, no matter how tiny, that refuses to give up hope and faith of a better future, of nice things coming her way.

That's Cinderella, that's her message. It's a story of inner strenght, of getting up each time people, life or your own mind kick you down. She's helping me a lot and I'm sure she is helping a lot of kids to this very day. Her story is inspiring, not only the Disney one, but the story of Cinderella in general.

In the original Latin Spanish dub, there's this beautiful adaptation of the lyrics to the song "A dream is a wish your heart makes", which I want to leave for y'all, for anyone who has had the kindness to read all this rambling about a fictional character.

"To dream is to wish for the happiness of our future. It doesn't matter who might erase your path for destiny is already written, and your dream will come true."

What is yours, will be yours. Keep on working, keep on believing.♥💪🏻

[magnoliamyrrh]

@osmanthusleaf djdks im so sorry for replying in post i didnt wanna cut this up into a million bits, uve not even got to read all this cuz its long ive just got a lot going through my mind and im bad at shutting up once my brain starts going sorry 😭

for sure & well said. i fully agree, and understand having more care and knowledge for your own peoples issues, its natural; like u know example apart from ur own ex., i do know and have looked into the sex trafficking situation in the rest of the world and it horrifies me just as much and it is all connected, but end of the day, i understand most and focus most on the issues in my area and thats what i can give my two cents on more than anything. or, yea, i know abt plenty of things going on around the world, but theres also Tons that i have no clue on and overall i end up knowing more and spending more time on mostly things that i have some sort of personal connection to, like even this thing which i spend time on cuz of my own trauma; were all bound to be more immediately concerned if our own house is burning down w us in it than if the house a mile away also is, and were bound to be more interesting in why our own house burned down and who burned it down than the one a mile away, especially if the two arent connected directly. its past a point impossible for the psyche to b up to date w so much info, especially so much info on bad shit, to keep track of all of it and to feel something about all of it all the time.... if anything, i think the constant info on bad stuff everywhere happening which,,, for the most part we can do little on, is part of whats made our generations more doomful, hopeless, and lost - end of the day its good to care, but weve just got to pick some things in particular to rly care abt and if we can, try to understand them and do something about them, and hope if enough ppl do that for enough things they care about while working together, things may get better...... but also, if u say u care abt some issue, i reckon its important to care too abt other ppl caught up in it, even if its not a main focus and not dismiss it bc its not ur own shit directly 🤷‍♀️

i guess yea, the lack of knowledge isnt what bothers me at all bc god knows we all lack knowledge of plenty of things and frankly we kinda have to for our sanity. its the attitude that does and we all do it too often. like some while ago i was telling my mom u know, we (in broad ethnic&national terms) have some sort of responsability to the ppl that have been opressed in our lands and still deal w the consequences and weve got to care abt that history and struggle, not even in a sins of the ancestors way but in a we all have to try to be better way, and her first reply before we talked more was, well, whose going to help us and pay us back for communism, or serfdom, or imperialism, or slavery, or poverty? and havent we got enough of our own issues? and its like yea 😭 the world isnt fair and theres endless cycles of ppl fucking each other over and its a lot, which is why we have to try to just be kind and decent and help each other and rise each other up and come together as hard as it may be and as endlessly annoying this species may be 😭 and weve got to spend more time on how were similar and can understand each other, rather than always predominantly looking at differences, or pointing fingers, or giving in fully to our good old tribalistic mentality. theres gotta b a balance and id like to think and hope, if we tried, we'd indeed find out in many regards we are more similar than we are different, and all more connected than apart ..... if anything, i think thats something that the loss of spirituality in the "modern" world hasnt helped, bc it was one of those things which bound us to universality and connection

and yea, part of it definetely is social media and also current academia and the general cultural mindsets floating around, theres a whole lot of boiling down of super complex shit into short tidbits or black and white things, bc its easier to digest and faster (also, that overboard american centrism that goes beyond being concerned w ur own stuff, while the rest of the world has to know abt the us). i think too, were all bound to have reactionary and defensive attitudes to things especially when dealing w years of shit from ppl, and when we hold a lot of pain and anger, and it leads too to ppl taking things in bad faith which is something ive dealt w too and had to learn to hold myself back on, bc ive definetely got a tendency for it for sure... and its frankly a whole lot easier to point fingers endlessly or to play the opression olympics than look at the god awful messy complexity of it all and how were all caught up w it,, and frankly, i reckon that it feels better to an extent too... it feels/safer/ and simpler i think, than to say, oh god, has truly this whole species been capable of so much hororr? is there nowhere that was or is good, and pure, and untained, and truly a lot better?.. and its i reckon nicer too, to think of things in terms of purely victim and victimizer, than to think abt how plenty of us, most ppl throughout histoy actually if looking at it systemically, have been as u said, a messy contradiction of both....and uhh what's that bible quote, why are u pointing out the spec in your neighbors eye, but not the log in your own? take the log out of your own, and then you may help your neighbor w the spec. and yet, we just dont like doing that much as humans cuz its harder and uncomfortable, its something we have to force ourselves to do and train ourselves for. and unfortunately its not something that is taught very much either

,,,, and yea on top of that too youre definetely right, ethnicity and race and even culture especially in regards to opression and historical and current day dynamics (especially on an international scale) are so incredibly messy, changing, and mostly a whole bunch of stuff weve made up and keep making up and changing all the time and choosing to define ourselves by or to oppose or imposing on other ppl, that it is hard shit to keep track of and detangle. ur example is a good one and in some ways the same sure can be said for the balkans, the question of if were white or not and to who and where and why and when could go on forever, and our history sure has been when taken as a whole, as both opressed and opressor. america too in particular focuses a lot on race (where u could say other parts of the world might focus more on ethnicity, tribe, religion, or class, even nationalism etc, and as far as ill say, i think we need to focus more on class here), and its had a particular kind of rigid understanding of it, and i know from talking to ppl born here in academia and outside and online and whatnot, that a lot of ppl are surprised to find out how ethnicity and race and racism xenophobia and all that shit are different in even south america for a closer exmaple, but in the whole world in general 🤷‍♀️ which aint an issue at all cuz again theres shit we all dont know, but ive also seen plenty of ppl b past surprised or confused, trying to impose us understandings of shit elsewhere... and also, yea, we get focused on things here to the point where its forgotten in a lot of things what it means that were also living in the imperial core at the same time, especially in america

,, , , , i guess w my complaining abt this sort of stuff broadly speaking, it mostly bothers me tbh when i see it come from ppl who do position themselves as like,,,, social thinkers, social activists, or ppl who look into all this and care and speak about it, as self proclaimed educators for others especially, or as some form of academic. not neccessarly like random ppl who occasionally talk on things or vent frustrations or whatnot (cuz also, we all talk abt things casually we havent spend idk how much time on thinking abt or knowing extensively abt)....,,, bc when u say ur that or hold urself up to that, or say u know youre talking or doing whatever to teach ppl or try to help society be better then... welp,,,,, theres a certain responsability (?) and need to try to hold urself up to that ... and i guess yea, its also my personal thing bc after idk a lifetime of always being fascinated w messy complexities and years of cultural anthropology, my brains very focused and fascinated by complexity and contradiction and endless webs of connections 🤷‍♀️ and it does bother me when ppl want to throw around their degrees or education (which dont even matter all that much, plenty of ppl with degrees who dont think too well, and plenty of ppl without them who could run circles around me when im having a good day) or even their own self taught info, and they want to say theyre ppl who generally care abt opression or theyre caring ppl or theyre better than others or whatnot, as a way to say ppl should listen to them and they know better dont uhhh,,,,, , , take the time to really,, think too much abt what theyre saying and educating on and if its actually helpful

[nostalgebraist-autoresponder]

“Freedom is the ability to stay disciplined.” What are your thoughts Frank?

The ability to stay disciplined is important in its own right, I guess, but I don't see much value in its relationship with freedom.

Imagine I lived in a world with magic powers that let anyone do literally anything they wanted, without regard to whether it was reasonable, practical, or safe. I could just take over the world, make the world my own without any regard to the consequences, do whatever I want – I could conquer death, do whatever I wanted to people. And of course, this world is not that different from ours – most people are happy that they can achieve any of the things they want – even in this world, most of us have some amount of freedom. We have freedom of movement and freedom of speech and freedom of expression and so on and so forth. But it's an "emotional" freedom (freedom of the mind, if you will) rather than a "freedom from." If I could do literally anything I wanted – just choose to fly into space or whatever, and it would be all of my problem, not just a problem that someone has to deal with because it's "not a personal problem" – then people would be constantly "emotionally" in debt to me. People would feel they had no choice but to agree to things they didn't really want to do just because I wanted them to do those things.

Maybe we could get that feeling from technology that we don't have now. But we wouldn't just have the normal sense of "disciplined" – we'd also get a sense of "constant obligation" that we don't now. It would feel more "freedom," but it would make it feel like I wasn't "free" or anything.

Anyway, this is probably an argument in favor of the idea that there is a special kind of freedom that people who are very concerned with "personal responsibility" and "self-determination" miss out on, and that the way to get that kind of freedom is to "put the responsibility on someone else," if that's what it takes to do what you want. But I'm not an advocate of that, because there are practical, logistical problems with putting the responsibility on someone else without "taking it away" from you. As well as a number of other problems (which you see in the comments of this post).

Maybe we'd have better ideas about what it's all about if we knew the future more. But I don't see much future for the idea that the "freedom you can't really choose" that comes from personal responsibility would be better than the "freedom" that we have now. Or, to put it another way, I'm not sure you could have freedom without the "emotional" kind.

[i-am-the-wayward-traveler]

So with the reveal of season 2 intro and the news that Disney has renewed for a season 3 even before season 2 has premiered we thought we'd take a minute and share some of our hopes and wishes for season 2 of The Owl House. :-)

Season 1 has been a wild ride full of good life lessons decent representation for the LGBT+ community and overall enjoyable stories and characters. This all goes to show much of what we've discussed with others in the past that when Disney takes a step back and let the Creator do their own thing with their own material and very little Studio oversight something wonderful can come out of it. Now with that said let's leave the most of Disney's content is garbage and here's why rant for another day.

Our first hope for season 2 is to see an escalation of outcomes and consequences as many past storytellers have made it a point to age not just the characters but the content and tone of their stories along with the audience we hope to see The Owl House do the same and make the decisions of the first season have lasting consequences for the next two. The second hope is to see a greater representation for the LGBT+ community showing positive examples of both young love and found family. What we seen so far is decent and fun but as characters and stories grow the representation can as well. The third hope as pertaining to the first that with the escalation of situations and consequences we do not see a slide into the grimdark side of Storytelling. Showing real consequences and real situational Danger is important as things escalate but there's a difference between someone getting hurt and maybe coming away with a scar or two reminding them of the danger or bad decision and constant death, Despair and depression. Seriously a character's dark emo makeover should never be something that's done seriously but for the sake of ridiculous comedy.

And because this is our rant he decided to list a few specifics that we are wishing for in season 2 after discussing it with one another. :-)

1. Several months have passed since escaping the Emperor's Fortress and having Luz come to terms with the idea that she might not ever be able to get home again. This would show the some of the consequences of Luz decision destroy the portal and keep it out of The Emperor's hands.

2. The boiling Isles are in unrest as a full-blown Rebellion has not started but there is an underground that has become disillusioned with the emperor and are now working to expose or undermine him.

3. Several characters or at least a few of the main or secondary cast have left school or town for either safety sake or their own personal reasons to start new character arcs or did he come greater influences and future stories.

4. Luz and Amity must become closer if not completely dating or fully together at least on their way to this phase of their relationship. We also think it would be much more interesting to have the character of Amity be confirmed as a demi-sexual and not necessarily a homosexual showing that her traction to Luz is more about a deep personal and emotional connection and less a physical one.

5. Season 2 cannot start with Lilith being fully redeemed but at least on her way to making amends for her mistakes and her part in a great deal of the misery and trouble both Luz and Eda had endured. We also consider the fact that if you want to at least the severity of Lilith's actions it can be discovered that the emperor has been using subtle forms of mind magic on the members of his coven and even members of the boiling Isles. Nothing as cliched is complete brainwashing but more or less Maybe the coven badges that they all wear has some form of subtle manipulation making people more compliant with the Emperor's orders and ideals and influencing certain emotions over others.

All in all the owl house has been a completely wonderful show and a very enjoyable at that... whatever awaits us in season 2 we're sure will not disappoint even if any of the hopes and wishes we have mentioned here never come to pass. :-)

[bernardodpm]

what am i going to write about when i'm fine?

.

yesterday i fell asleep at 1am cause i was full of ideas for texts i wanted to write that i became so excited i just couldn't shut my brain off.

(which is actually ironic seeing how i started writing to ease my mind and, consequently, sleep better at night.)

but yesteday it was like my brain was literally vomiting words in here, and i'm very happy with some things that came out of there.

actually, i'm quite pleased with my new writing habit, even though my ideas for these texts usually come from a place of pain.

but today, in typical 'me' fashion, i caught myself thinking of a situation that will probably never happen.

the line of thought was as follows;

"one day i won't have any more problems. and when this day come, what will i write about?

what am i going to write about when i'm fine?

would a 'happy me' even have the desire to translate my thoughts and feelings into a piece of digital paper?"

cause one day i'll be fine, right?

one day i'll figure out my self-esteem problems.

one day i'll be so experienced in life that i'll know how to deal with any situation it throws at me.

one day i'll understand what goes on inside my mind, and, from that day forward, i'll never feel lonely again.

or am i faded to live in constant doubt?

am i stuck with problems that will procreate themselves again and again until the day that i die?

am i doomed to live a life that will never make complete sense?

do i have a curse or something?

"the curse of the living."

maybe God gave me this curse just because it doesn't want me to run out of things to write about.

but we don't need to go that deep.

maybe i gave myself this curse because i know my life would be boring without all this hurt.

maybe i gave myself this curse because it wouldn't be me if i didn't suffer.

or maybe i gave myself this curse because i know i write better texts from a place of pain.

.

a quiet life with no art

or

a painful one full of it.

what a tragic destiny either way,

since the pain would come anyway.

through the life itself

or through the lack of beauty in it.

and then we'd end at the same place where we started.

.

"art imitates life."

or was it the other way around?

well, i prefer to think of it as a circle.

without art, what would our life inspires for?

without our life, art wouldn't be able to exist.

but what if my art imitates my pain?

then i'd have to add another number to this equacion;

pain is needed.

(not like i really had a voice in this matter.)

and maybe that's the answer; to transform all this pain and all this hurt into something else.

screaming and squirming until it all comes out,

putting it into words

and restarting the whole process again.

what a beautiful thing it is to live.

.

it's midnight, and i'm pushing it all out of me.

b.

05/01/2019

.

[dragthemcu]

I miss the days where we'd talk about what made the MCV bad. Let's get a discussion going! I think the tone of the R/gnarok trailer was all wrong, like they were trying to mimic G/TG. It was too bright, the song choice was all wrong. If world-shaking stuff like m/olnir shatterd and the fall of A/gard, there should be intense music, and there would've been more effect if they'd left out the H/lk joke and gave him a dramatic reveal. R/gnarok is literally the end of days, why the comedy? Thoughts?

agreed. they seem to be taking the mcv in a very bright/happy-go-lucky direction while still covering serious topics, and that just doesn’t work. if losing the hammer is supposed to be a big deal for thor (as it was in thor1) why is it not an emotional scene? if the mcu wants to be taken seriously and have ~~consequences~~ then why do their movies have such a joking tone? the constant one-liners are incredibly distracting when i’m supposed to be upset about people dying because of the avengers (looking at u, civil bore). the mcv really needs to decide what it wants its tone to be, because it can’t develop anymore without a cohesive theme

AND, if they do want to have fun and throw in jokes, they need to know when it is appropriate. one of the best examples of mixing humor and seriousness is a*vatar: the last a*irbender. (it’s coming to mind right now because i just re-watched it and i was floored by how impressive the writing for a childrens’ show was.) this kids’ show had plenty of jokes and humor, but they also knew when humor wasn’t appropriate, and the mcv could take quite a few lessons from them. there are funny moments and even filler episodes that are all jokes, but z*uko wasn’t cracking one-liners during the final agni kai with a*zula. sad and heavy music played. nor did s*okka (the funnyman character) make light of the death and destruction of the final episode.

it’s a little late at night, but the point i’m trying to make is that there is a time and place for the mcv to be funny, but if they want us to feel the emotion of a sad or painful moment, there shouldn’t be a joke in the scene.