#we’re going to uhhhhhhhhh

[idontliketomatoesleavemealone]

I do still kinda feel like shit but that’s okay

[arc-misadventures]

Jaune is asked FMK on his all female teammates, but instead it’s his mom asking BMI.

Body mass index? No, Breed, Mate, or Impregnate.

BMI: Jaune

Juniper: Oh, Jaune~?

Jaune: Oh great… hell is here…

Pyrrha: What are you talking about, it’s just your mom?

Nora: Hi, Mom!

Rin: Hello, Mrs. Arc.

Juniper: Hello girls!

Jaune: What do you want mom?

Juniper: Can you answer something for me~?

Jaune: No.

Juniper: What? But, I haven’t even asked you anything.

Jaune: Aye, but it’s you, so what ever it is, is something I don’t want to answer!

Juniper: Please~!

Jaune: …

Jaune: Haa… fine ask your question… But, it better nit be MFK, or so help me!

Pyrrha: You relented pretty fast.

Jaune: She’ll keep bothering me until I finally say yes, so I might as well as get this over, and done with.

Rin: Wise choice.

Juniper: Okay, Jaune… BMI…

Jaune: BMI; the hell is that?

Juniper: Breed, Mate, and Impregnate~!

Jaune: WHAT?! What the hell is that?

Juniper: It’s things you do when you have se…?!

Jaune: I know what it is! It’s just, why are you asking me this?

Juniper: I thought you were tired of doing, MFK, so I decided go spice things up.

Jaune: Ironically I would have preferred that… Haa… okay… who are the poor victims you have chosen this time?

Juniper: I want you to BMI: Pyrrha, Rin, and Nora~!

Jaune: WHAT?!

NPR: 😳😳😳

Juniper: What? I’m simply curious what you would do with your friends if given the opportunity to, BMI.

Jaune: But, Mom, you’re asking me to do this to my…

Pyrrha: Jaune, answer the question.

Jaune: What?! Pyrrha, you can’t be…

Nora: Answer the question, Jaune.

Jaune: But, she asking me to…

Rin: Answer the question.

Jaune: But…?!

NPR: ANSWER THE QUESTION!

Jaune: Okay! Okay! Okay!

Jaune: Haa…

Jaune: I would, Mate with, Pyrrha.

Pyrrha: Why?

Jaune: Do you really want to know why?

Pyrrha: Yes!

Jaune: Okay?! Because I believe you are not ready for the other two options because you’re focusing on your career.

Pyrrha: A fair assessment.

Jaune: I’d breed, Nora…

Nora: Why?! Tell me?! What position would you take me in?! How long would you do me?! How many loads would you dump in me?!

Juniper: Oh my~!

Jaune: …?!

Jaune: I s-said, Nora because I thought she would be into it. I didn’t think she’d be that into it!

Nora: I’m totally into being breed like a brood mare by you, Jaune~!

Jaune: Uhhhhhhhhh?!?!

Pyrrha: So that’s what, Nora’s moaning in the middle of the night were about.

Ren: Like yours are any better.

Pyrrha: Y-You know?!

Jaune: And, lastly I would… I would impregnate, Rin…

Rin: Wonderful~! When shall we start!

Jaune: B-Beg pardon…?

Rin: You said you would impregnate me. Shall we get started now, or what?

Jaune: You want me to do that now?!

Rin: Yes.

Jaune: B-But, what about your career of becoming a huntress?

Rin: I much rather have a career as a housewife for our children than be a huntress.

Jaune: But, we’re still in school!

Ren: And?

Jaune: Ah?!

Jaune: Guys help me out here.

Pyrrha: Help you impregnate, Rin? Of course I’ll help~!

Jaune: Help?!

Nora: Would you be upset if you knocked me up while you impregnate, Rin?

Jaune: WAIT, WHAT?!

Rin: Come on, Jaune; let’s go start our happy family~!

Jaune: Ahh, no wait! Mom! Save me!

Juniper: Make sure to drink lots of water dear~!

Jaune: You traitor!

~~~

Glynda: Mr. Arc…

Jaune: Yes, Professor Goodwitch…?

Glynda: You impregnated… your entire team…

Jaune: Yeah… Mom, put ideas in their heads, and well… that happened.

Glynda: I see… Juniper getting involved would certainly answer things… But, let me ask you something.

Jaune: Yes, Professor?

Glynda: Why wasn’t I involved in this game of BMI?

Jaune: …

Jaune: Eh…?

[yourplayersaidwhat]

"I'm the brains, your the brawns"

DM: You're in the dungeon. You don't hear anything except a dripping noise from somewhere. Also, it's pitch black because neither of you have dark vision.

Fairy Ranger: I'll cast light!

Goliath (Totem) Barbarian: Wait! We don't know what's down here! Let me borrow your bat. I'll cast beast sense. 

DM: *Explains part of a layout. Important parts being 2 undead creatures shambling in one room, on the other side of the dungeon there's a room of bunkbeds with a colorful ornate lock* 

Fairy Ranger: TO THE UNDEAD!

Goliath Barbarian: No! If we don't need to fight them, let's avoid it. We're here for the magical artifact. We don't need to start unnecessary fights. 

Fairy Ranger: Come on though! it'll be fun!

Goliath barbarian: Go on ahead, I'm going the other way!

Fairy Ranger: Whoa whoa whoa wait wait wait. I'm squishy! I'll literally die with you! I'm the brains your the brawns. 

Goliath barbarian: ... 

Fairy Ranger: *Cheering very loudly when Goliath solves the color lock puzzle* 

DM: Goliath, with your passive perception you hear the shuffling quiet down. 

Fairy Ranger: Oh sweet they're further away!

Goliath Barbarian: I dive under a bunk bed and hide *rolls really well*

Fairy Ranger: Ok, seeing Goliath hide I'll also hide behind the door. 

DM: The currently unlocked door? 

Fairy Ranger: uh. yes? 

DM: ... Fine then. *Rolls poorly* Well shit they somehow don't see you even with dark vision. 

Goliath Barbarian: Oh and the 8 foot tall giant hiding under fairy sized bunk beds is much better hidden. 

DM: Excellent point. Probably better than the door though. 

Fairy Ranger: GOLIATH HELP! *Decided to sneak off and attack the undead without the barbarian* 

Goliath Barbarian: Considering I'm underwater I'm guessing I don't hear her? 

DM: Correct. What are you picking up?

Goliath Barbarian: I'll roll for the ore for the fifth lock. I'm pretty sure it's sapphire from your riddle. 

Fairy Ranger: I'M GOING TO DIE! (Does not die, because she managed to escape to the barbarian)

DM: The sphinx roars for you to solve her riddles three. What do you own but others use more?

Fairy Ranger: Uhhhhhhhhh. Don't worry I got this Goliath! I'm the brains after all! You're the brawns. 

Goliath Barbarian: Your name? 

DM: Very good. I'm impressed you got that!

Goliath Barbarian: I get lucky every once in awhile. 

DM: It brings back the lost as though never gone, shines laughter and tears with light long since shone, a moment to make, a life time to shed, valued then but lost when you're dead.

Fairy Ranger: Oh oh a story!

DM: Wrong. 

Goliath Barbarian: Memories. 

DM: Correct, how impressive! Now. How will you die? 

Goliath barbarian: Hopefully in battle protecting my loved ones. 

Fairy Ranger: I never will! *Ranger gets attacked by Sphinx and has to solve a 'penalty course'.*

Fairy Ranger: We did it! Because I'm the brains and he's the brawns!

Goliath Barbarian: Ah yes, with my +2 int. I'm of course dumb. 

Fairy Ranger: HAHAHA I've got a 0. So your the brains AND the brawns! What am I then?

DM: The comedic relief? 

Fairy Ranger: Excellent! I'm better at that. Riddles are hard. 

[hornytome]

———————————————————

content warning!!! sex stuff ahead!!!

———————————————————————-

this is from a personal essay i wrote recently discussing my butchness. i wanted to write a realistic scenario w my gf that demonstrates how the soft packer and the hard packer can be used in a sex context!! the end is just uhhhhhhhhh……… my own,,,, my own twist. this has graduated from horny text posts to straight up erotica so… enjoy that I guess? ———————————————————————

We’re on the couch and no one is home. My hard packer is nestled in between my thighs and my soft packer is in my boxer briefs. She’s wearing one of my big t-shirts with her panties underneath. Futurama or something is on in the background, but neither of us are paying attention as my fingers tease her through her panties. She has a growing wet spot that I want to bury my face into. She scooches closer and puts her hand on my thigh, slowly rubbing up and down. She shudders when she realizes I’m packing. She slips her hands to the front of my sweats, gently rubbing the bulge in my pants. The slight pressure is enough to make me grind into her hand. I take off my sweats, leaving my dick out in the open.

She shuffles in front of me with her knees on the floor, and takes me into her mouth. I put my hand in her hair as she slowly bobs her head up and down, letting out little moans here and there. I grip her hair a little harder, enough to feel good, and start to guide her head up and down a little faster. I notice she’s touching herself and I can’t help but buck up into her mouth. I can hear how wet she is as her fingers frantically circle her clit. She’s choking a little bit here and there, but that somehow adds to it. She pulls her head up, looking me in the eyes, and begs me to just fuck her already.

I excuse myself to the bathroom to put in the hard packer. She’s touching herself on the couch as I come out, fingers playing with the wetness and her clit. Grabbing her by the hips, I position her over the arm of the couch. Her pussy is pink and puffy and drives me fucking insane. I reach over and stick my fingers in her mouth, letting her take it in and sufficiently wet my fingers. I slip them into her as a taste of what my cock can give her. After a few minutes of teasing, I gently line up and slip inside her. Grabbing her by the hips, I give a couple of shallow strokes to make sure it’s comfortable for her. The second she gives me a little moan, I slam into her. Hard enough to create that slapping sound. I can see her wetness coating the strap every time it slides out of her, stretching her pussy open. I tell her to take my butch cock, to let me put a baby in her. To breed her. I know it drives her fucking wild. Despite previously being pretty quiet, she moans like a whore with penetration. Every stroke hits her g-spot, making her louder and louder.

As good as it feels, I know she needs clit stimulation to cum. That’s when I ramp up the dirty talk, calling her my dumb little princess, wrapping a hand around her throat and jaw while I praise my sweet princess for taking it so well. She can take a minute to cum, but that’s not really an issue for me. It just means I get to fuck her longer. This is when she gets loudest—the neighbors can probably hear her moaning like a slut through the walls. She says she’s close, and I summon all of my strength to ram into her and give her what she deserves. As soon as she cums, I position us back into cuddling on the couch, covering her in little kisses all over. We slump onto each other, exhausted.

I’m convinced I can get her to cum twice. I trail my hands towards her panties again and go in gentle circles. It takes a minute, but I get her to softly moan every few seconds. Sliding down to the floor, I take her sensitive little clit into my mouth, being gentle and using broad strokes. She bucks her hips into my mouth and clenches her stomach if I use even a little bit too much pressure. It takes about 40 minutes, but by the end I have her screaming. Her hands are gripping my hair and she’s practically riding my face. She’s never had a second orgasm before, but I’m happy to provide that. My face is buried in her pussy, wetness dripping down my face. As she gets close, I focus all of my energy on licking that little spot right under her clit. She grips my hair hard enough to tear as she comes, screaming my name and wildly bucking her hips up and down. She gets the little kisses treatment again, and a deep kiss that I hope communicates my love for her.

[f4y3w00d5]

And to finish up for the night here is my brief description of Every Song in Danger Days: True Lives Of The Fabulous Killjoys, by My Chemical Romance

Okay so basically  this is their most recent album, 2014, and it follows the Killjoys as they fight against BL.IND (Better Living Industries) who seek to ELIMINATE all  individuality. (Spoiler: They die saving The Girl in the music video for SING) 

Na Na Na (Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na) - 

Upbeat!!! Dancing!!! Fast!!! You jump around screaming about doing crime and partying and sex!!! I love it!!! (you should listen to it after Look Alive Sunshine, which is the intro to the album and its just Dr D speaking, and at the start of Na Na Na, it goes ‘THE FUTURE IS BULLETPROOF! THE AFTERMATH IS SECONDARY!! TIME TO DO IT NOW AND DO IT LOUD! KILLJOYS, MAKE SOME NOISE!!!’) 

Bulletproof Heart 

Uh so this is sorta less fast and stuff but its SO cool and idk how to describe it but its sorta jaunty? First song I listened to by the band!!! (Fav part is ‘and tho, I know, how much you hate this. Are you gonna be the one to save us? From. The black. And hope-less feelin. Will you meet ‘em when the end comes reelin? Hold, your heart, into this darkness. Will it ever be the light to shine you out? Or fail. And leave you stranded? I aint gonna be the one left standin. You aint gonna be the one left standin, and we aint gonna be the ones left standin!!!’) 

SING 

Aaaaaaaaa this ones so cool, took a bit to grow on me, its mostly slow and repetitive but the BRIDGE ‘Cleaned up corporations PROGRESS! Dyin in the PROCESS! Children that can TALK ABOUT IT livin on the WEB-WAYS, people movin SIDEWAYS, sell it til your LAST DAYS, buy yourself the motivation GENERATION NOTHIN! Nothing but a DEAD SCENE! Product of a WHITE DREAM! I am not the SINGER THAT YOU WANTED BUT A DANCER! I REFUSE TO ANSWER! TALK ABOUT THE PAST SIR! WROTE IT FOR THE ONES WHO WANNA GET AWAY! ……. Keep runnin.’ 

Planetary (GO!)  

Okay so like omg. I love this one. Everythings amazin. Starts off slightly slow, and then starts movin faster around the verses? AND THE VIBES!!! Ive got a few favs and ill save them here (I love the way theyre said too-) ‘Ladies and gentleman, truth is now acceptable! Fame! Is now injectable, PROCESS THE PROGRESS, This core is critical, faith is un-a-vail-a-ble, Lives, become incredible-‘ and also ‘Youre unbelievable, ah, so unbelievable, ah, you ruin everything, oh, you better GO HOME! Im unbelievable yeah, im undefeatable yeah, LETS RUIN EVERYTHIN, BLAST IT TO THE BACK ROW- they sell presentable, young! And so ingestible! Sterile and collectable! SAFE, and I cant STAND THAT! This is a letter, by word, is the beretta, the sound, of my vendetta against, the ones that PLANNED IT!’ So uhhhhhhhhh yeah lol 

The Only Hope For Me Is You 

Likeeeeeeeee holy SHIT this one just sorta- idkkkk- ‘Where? Where were you when, all of the embers fell? I still remember them… covered in ash. Covered in glass. Covered in all my friends, I still… think of the bombs they built- IF THERES A PLACEEE THAT I COULD BE, THEN ID BE ANOTHERR MEMORY, CAN I BE THE ONLY HOPE FOR YOU? BECAUSE YOURE THE ONLY HOPE FOR ME! AND IF WE CAN FIND WHERE  WE BELONG, WE’ll Have To make It on our own!! Face all the painnn and takeee it on, because the only hope for me, is you alone…’ its one of the slower ones tho 

Party Poison 

This one starts in Japanese for some reason??? Its hard to explain… another fast and dancy type one ig, but sorta raw-er?  Its sooooooo weird- not one of my favs but its semi popular 

Save Yourself, I’ll Hold Them Back 

Okay so idk how to describe this really- sorta gives Only Hope type thing but faster and sorta rockier? Idk. My fav parts tho!!! ‘Get offfff the ledge, and drop the knife… Not a victim of a victims life! Because… this aint a room fullla suicides- WE’RE BELIEVERSS I BELIEVE TONIGHT-‘  OH AND ONE OF THE MORE POPULAR LINES PEOPLE KNOW ‘Ill tell you well how the story ends, where the good guys die and the bad guys win… (WHO CARES?)- THIS AINT ABOUT ALL THE FRIENDS YOU MADE, BUT THE GRAFFITII THEY WRITE ON YOUR GRAVE-‘ then the last two ‘Im the only friend that makes you cry! Youre a heart attack in black hair dye! So just save yourself, and Ill hold them back tonight….’ And ‘We can live forever if you’ve got the time- YOU MOTHERFUCKER (OHHHWHOAAAA) Youre the broken glass in the mornin light! Be a burnin’ star if it takes all night!’ 

S/C/A/R/E/C/R/O/W 

OHOHOH APPARENTLY THIS ONE IS TO SOOTHE THE KIDS WHEN THE NUCLEAR BOMBS HIT AND GET THEM INTO THE SHELTER!!! (yes there are nuclear bombs, its post apocalyptic lmao) I love the bridge- ‘Love, love, love wont stop this bomb, bomb, love wont stop this bomb, bomb, love wont stop this… bomb……. Run, run, bunny, run. Run, run, bunny ruuuuuuuuuuun’ One of the slowest in the album also 

Summertime 

Okay so this is prolly my fav? Idk how to describe it tbh….. I know what it describes for me buuuut you don’t wanna hear me be weird about people……. Ill just tell you my fav parts (that I relate to!!!) ‘Terrified of what I’d be, as a kid from what Ive seen… Every single day when people try and put the pieces back together, just to smash them down… turn my headphones up real loud…. I don’t think I need them now…. Cos you stop the noise!!!’ 

DESTROYA 

………………fucked up robot song where you scream and moan. What else is there to say? (the porn bots In the story worship a ‘god’ called Destroya who will supposedly come save them) 

The Kids From Yesterday 

I love this one too. Sorta slow ig. Nostalgic maybe? ‘Well now, this could be the last of all the rides we take…. So hold on tight and don’t look back……… we don’t care about the message or the rules they make…. Ill find you when the sun goes black…..’ 

Vampire Money 

Dance!!! Sex!! Upbeat!!! Fast!!! ‘Three two one, we came to FUCK-‘ and my other fav line ‘and get your finger on the trigger tap the barrel of the gun! Hair back, motherfucker, jet black, SO COOL-‘ 

@terrencetheshark14 you might be interested in my weird ass mcr related ramblings

[leonardepsilonchurch]

i wanna write a fic but i can’t focus for that long so i’m just gonna write a long rambley summary instead. enjoy.

after flowers died tucker and church spent a lot of time just dicking around bc they realized that sarge decided that 4 on 2 wasn’t a fair fight and therefore the reds wouldn’t attack so they just hung around inside with their armor off while they waited for their next recruit and this results in them roughhousing a lot bc they’re both repressed men with the desperate need to be touched by another man and so tucker gets a semi and he’s like you can’t fucking blame me i haven’t touched a woman in ages and church thinks it’s the funniest thing in the world that tuckers turned on from this so he keeps him pinned down and makes fun of him and tuckers like. man it’s really weird that i’m making literally no effort to get church off of me huh. this surely doesn’t mean anything.

and then for like a week afterwards tucker keeps trying to needle church extra hard to tick him off into fighting again but church just keeps getting annoyed and screaming at him until tucker pushes it too hard and they end up ACTUALLY fighting and church gives tucker a bloody nose and tucker wants to be pissed but church is like “oh goddammit” and starts cleaning him up and tuckers like uhhhhhh bc he has a little bit of a concussion and church keeps touching his face and when he leans his head back church yells at him about not leaning back with a bloody nose and holds his head facing downwards and tucker is like UHHHHHHHHH

and if before this church constantly threatened to enter tuckers sexual fantasies now he’s the only thing on tuckers mind. so tucker starts REALLY focusing hard on the one swimsuit mag they have to try and drown church out but all that actually manages to do is make the version of church in his head that’s holding him down and being mean to him a chick. so he starts begging church to get actual porn in the next supply drop because clearly the issue is that he needs some new exciting women to think about and church is like. yeah okay whatever.

then church is able to finagle some of grifs pruno by promising to hide it from sarge and they get wasted and tuckers like haha church you would be so hot if you were a girl… if you were a girl i’d fuck you…. hahaha,,,,,, church i wish you were a girl so i could fuck you and church is like. fucking okay??? and then tucker kisses him and he’s like what the FUCK are you doing dude and tuckers like. dude i can’t stop thinking about chick you fucking me. and church is like. yeah okay i’m gonna get you those porn mags.

so next shipment comes and church is like. here you go. stop being weird now. and tuckers like. okay haha yeah this fixed me (spoilers: it did not. the fantasies have now turned into fem church AND masc church double teaming him. oh also at some point i forgot to mention church and tucker talk about sucking dick and church admits that he’s sucked his ex girlfriends strap and also gotten pegged. so THAT works it’s way in there too.) and church is like awesome.

so church thinks it’s chill to start roughhousing again and one day he gets tucker in a headlock and tucker just. is fully erect about it and church is like. dude. are you serious here. and tuckers like. what do you want from me i’m desperate man. and church is like. if i jerk you off and you imagine it’s a chick will you stop being so fucking weird (bc tucker has been being weird lately). and tuckers like 😶😶😶 uh yeah. yeah. yeah i’ll. yeah. yeah we can. yeah okay. yeah.

so then they like. put on the tv and sit next to each other on the couch and it’s VERY unsexy but it does actually work a little bit like some of the tension is released. but now tuckers like. wait okay we’re uneven. there’s an imbalance. and church doesn’t care he doesn’t need to be jerked off but tuckers got it in his head now. they need to be even. and he has no ulterior motives behind this. so FINALLY church is like. fine if it gets you to shut up about it. and tuckers like. yeah okay this is fine <-defintiely not stoked out of his fucking mind for this.

and church is like. okay well i’m not jerking off on the couch like and getting cum all over my pants like a fucking animal (tucker) we’ll do it in the showers. and it’s definitely not weird that they’re naked in the shower jerking off of course not. and church is actually kind of mad because he just like yanked tuckers dick up and down but tuckers actually like. good at this? and obviously church is also good at this much better than tucker actually but it’s not like he was TRYING before and it’s almost like tucker is trying to show him up?? so once tucker finishes he pushes tucker against the wall like don’t try to upstage me asshole and jerks him real hard and good. and tuckers like. OKAY? THANKS? but also we’re right back to where we started now jackass. and church is like. oh no. what a shame. guess we have to do this again. and tucker is like. oh right. what a shame. guess we have to do this again.

this was supposed to have a conclusion but i ran out of steam. oh well. just imagine them fucking sloppy at the end

[tecceran]

when you get this, you can answer with 5 things you like about yourself (if you want to), and then send this ask to 10 of your followers (or as many as you want to, spread positivity, but take care of yourself)

adskahdsjalhskadhsksl this was way harder than it should have been so it took me a while to get to it…

1.) i suppose to start, i have always been happy with my body. i don’t experience much of anything in the way of dysphoria (aside from the constant hairstyle debate) and i have enough natural athleticism that i can move my body weight if need be (i.e. pulling myself up onto/over something) which for whatever reason is something i’ve always been proud of. my ability to scale a mid-sized wall.

2.) i also like, or at least appreciate that i absorb and retain information quite well. while my actual work ethic may not be great, i am able to do pretty well in academics just from info sticking with me pretty well. i think i learn stuff well in general.

3.) i have been pretty happy with my art lately, or at least i’ve felt a lot more like it’s worthy of been posted and seen by others. i have so many ideas, and i want to draw more often.

4.) i guess i like that i can take charge and overcome my shyness/social anxiety when someone else doesn’t want to. i guess the older sibling instinct outweighs the people are scary instinct. pretty sure the people in my group for the freshman seminar presentation loved me because i would—for whatever reason—just run my mouth until whoever came to see our project left.

5.) i guess it’s not really about me, but i’m really glad that i’ve been able to have so many great people around me. sure, my little brother is going thru his teenage asshole years, but we have each other’s backs when we’re out. not to mention all my close friends have been such wonderfully kind, talented, and inspiring people and we’ve stuck together with minimal drama for a while. for that i’m certainly grateful.

uhhhh uhhhhhhhh uhhhhhhhhhh i got all serious and rambly uhhhhh uhhhhhhhhh MY DOG BE UPON YE

[ososimilar]

Chapter 1- Seb

“So… which of us do you think would end up in jail first?” Abigail asked.

“Uhhhhhhhhh……” Sam said.

“Interesting question,” Sebastian said. “How does this help us write another song?”

“It's just a thought experiment.”

“Well you'd go to jail for trespassing,” Sebastian said. “Or….” He paused and thought. “If we were caught smoking that shit your mom grows.”

“Wait, you guys smoke?!” Sam said.

“Why'd you tell him that?” Abigail chided.

“You should join us some time.”

“I don't think he'd be into that Seb.”

“Well I'm not a baby.” Sam pouts.

“I dont think youre a baby Sam.”

“Three, two one!” Abby says half heartedly as she begins playing the drums.

They play together, Abby on drums, Sam on guitar and Seb on the keyboard. For Sebastian the keyboard is the only thing he has, he was never smart enough to gain Darius’ attention. So he lost himself in the keys, hoping to gain Robin's attention. When that didn't work he locked himself in his room closing himself off while he would work on his computer.

As he listened to Sam sing he couldn't help but smile to himself while thinking about the boy who managed to get him to leave his room. Abby too had done a lot for Seb, during her trips to the mines she’d gather frozen tears for him. They were always there for him when he was depressed. Robin tried to empathize but she didn't understand him. But these two didn't pry, they were simply there for him.

“WHOOOOO!!!”

Sam's shout pulled Sebastian out of his thoughts.

Abby cheered. “We’re getting pretty good!”

“Pretty good? Why not super good?! Or totally tubular?!” Sam chuckled at his own joke.

“Guys it's getting late and Vincent is going to bed, you guys can stay but you have to be quiet” Jody shouts from the other room.

“I guess that's my queue to leave,” Abby says as she stands up from her drumset.

“Awe, you guys dont wanna stay and hang out” sam mopes. “We can watch a movie, I heard of this cool one about a guy who goes to space.”

“Wow it sounds so interesting, '' Abby says in a mocking voice. You have to be super obvious with sarcasm around Sam or else he won't get it.

“Don't be rude,” Seb says. “I’ll watch it with you.” He looks at Sam then quickly looks away.

“Yes!”

Sams so cute when he celebrates Seb thinks. He looks at Abby.

“I'd rather not,” she says.

“Awe come one,” Sam whines.

“Seb will keep you company.”

Sam looks at Sebastian, “guess it's just us today.”

Seb looks at Abby, eyes pleading with her to stay. Abby pretends not to notice what's written all over his face as she walks out the door.

They stand there in silence for a moment until they start hearing Jodie and Abigail talking outside the door.

“Mom’s still up,” Sam says. “Wanna just watch on my bed so we don't have to bug her. To be honest she's been kinda uptight lately. I think it's because dad comes home soon.” He sits on his bed and begins clicking away on his laptop. “Oh sorry,'' Sam scoots over. “You can sit too.”

fuck ive just been standing here awkwardly Seb thinks. He goes and sits on the edge of the bed making sure to leave space between them. Just act normal, nothings changed, Sam probably hasn’t noticed anything yet. “I can't believe you still have a twin sized bed.” He laughs. “It can barely fit just one person how is it supposed to fit both of us?”

“Well… it's not like there's anyone I'm trying to share it with.” Sam says. “Wait, don't you also sleep on a twin sized bed?”

“Well yeah… but I'm the only person in my room ever. Besides, I've never been interested in sharing a bed before.”

“Twin sized mattress” Sam wonders aloud. “That'd be a good song title.” He sets the laptop near his feet and starts the movie. “Can you turn off the lights?” Sam looks at Seb when he says it.

Fuck, i cant focus when he looks at me. Why's he got to be so damn cute. He thinks while he stumbles to the lightswitch.

As he sits back on the bed the movies not even registering in his mind, his thoughts are solely on the space between him and sam. Sam is focused on the movie, making cute comments here and there about whatever is happening in the movie.

“Seb are you okay?” Sam asks, a tinge of worry in his voice. “You look super pale.”

“Oh, uh, I just have a bit of a headache is all.”

“You don't have to stay, you can go home and rest.”

“That… that's probably best.”

Sam pauses the movie and closes the computer. He gets up and grabs a jacket.

Sebatian looks at him confused. “I can't let you walk home sick by yourself, what if you fall or pass out or something”

Sam opens the door and Seb stumbles out. “Mom im gonna walk Sebastian home, he's not feeling good,” Sam shouts as they leave.

How did this end up happening? It's almost surreal, walking home in the moonlight with snow falling, Sam at his side walking past the steps to the old community center. As they enter the clearing their moment is interrupted by Maru, gazing at the stars through her telescope.

“Oh hey sam!” Maru exclaims. “Come look at this star cluster.”

“In a minute, Seb doesn't feel good so imma get him in bed then i'll come look, '' Sam shuffles inside with Seb. They walk down the stairs to Sebs room, a room that's normally cold but Seb can't help but feel Sam's warmth. Seb lays down in bed, Sam looks at him and tucks him in.

“I'd give you a kiss goodnight but that'd be weird wouldn't it” Sam chuckles nervously.

Seb just lays there, looking up at the boy of his dreams.

“Feel better” Sam says, before walking away. Seb can't help but feel like that's the last time he's ever gonna Sam the same way. As he dozes off he can't help but wish he dreams of Sam.

Chapter 2

[ike-mcswains-mortician]

Uhhhhhhhhh bananas??/silly

Idk uhhh favorite dnd shenangains you have if any lol

BANANASSSSS RAHHHHH🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌 underrated fruit fr

favorite dnd shenanigans!!! AAAH i can’t pick so here’s a couple:

there was a time in my first campaign where the party snuck into a person’s house to try and find documents they needed. she comes home while we’re inside so i turn myself and our cleric invisible, our gunslinger runs upstairs and hides, and then our warlock and rogue can’t hide in time so the lady opens her door and sees these two random guys in her house. warlock immediately goes “heyyyyy we’re here with the homeowners association, would you mind if we took a look at your gutters? they aren’t up to code.” one very lucky persuasion roll later and this woman is really apologetically showing them around her house over nothing LMAO

same campaign, different antics! my character had her first kiss during a session and our warlock is super protective of her so he was NOT having it. his patron is my character’s father, so he takes out his magic book and writes to his patron to basically ask “is your daughter allowed to kiss boys” but the patron was being held hostage by the BBEG, so there was no way the patron was going to answer right? NOPE cause warlock rolls a nat 20 on persuasion to convince the BBEG to stop torturing his patron for 2 minutes to tell my character if she can or cannot kiss boys

one more: in true glenn close fashion, our warlock natural 20’ed to hit the BBEG with a deez nuts joke hehehehe

(obligatory @lumi-lyn @marsomar tag cause i miss the lousy tippers)

[yoon-kooks]

give us an update about ur man!!

going to see him rn actually! hes a homebody like me so we’re just gonna chill at his place this weekend LOOOOOL

the running joke is that we’re “taking it slow” but uhhhhhhhhh 🤪

[i-am-a-freg]

for the Catholic asks: 1, 8, 21, 28???

1. How many siblings do you have?

Oh boy. Well if you’re counting living ones, 10. I’m the third oldest :) if we’re counting all of them, 16 I believe, in which case I am the fifth oldest. So that puts my family at 17 kids.

8. Have you ever prayed in a restaurant? In front of strangers?

Yep! More times than I can count. Every time I go out and eat food somewhere(whether that’s at a restaurant or I brought food) I do. No one seems to mind :P

21. Where do you put your hands during the Our Father at mass?

Goodness. Um. Can you believe I actually have no memory of that lol. I think I probably just have them in the praying hands position i guess, or clasped. Idk. 🤔

28. What’s your favorite liturgical season?

Uhhhhhhhhh. Good question. I like lent and advent and Christmas a lot, I guess in that order. I don’t like saying any of them are my FAVORITE because I like advent and lent almost equally but yknow. Maybe lent?

[beta-adjacent]

Omegaverse Dynamic Placements: The Grand Budapest Hotel (sleepy speedrun, any%)

Just watched the Grand Budapest Hotel and uhhhhhhhhh I’ve never related to a fictional character more than Zero, so he’s a beta now, absolutely bodies the silently-struggling-as-second-in-command role.

And and and!!!!! We’re led to believe M. Gustave is an alpha the entire time until!! We see the Crossed Keys Society uses Paniache perfume, masking their true dynamics as alpha/authority, which just boosts the significance all the more when Gustave lets Zero spritz himself too. Smell-o-vision would have a field day with this, but I like to think that Zero didn’t figure it out until the perfume got put on himself and he couldn’t smell his own scent. Like, the dirt/un-scenting patches would’ve covered Gustave still; there’s no way they were going to deal with heats/ruts in that prison so they must’ve put suppressants on everyone regardless.

Anyways, Gustave could actually just be an alpha but needs to present that even more with his facade, which is an interesting commentary of how authority & gender & institutions play together. This is an even more interesting idea if Joplin/the William Dafoe character is also heavily presenting as an alpha (contrasts of masculinity and all that).

Sorry, “she’s good for you because she’s pure unlike us”, “she’s very brave”, etc etc, Agatha is an easy vision as an omega but honestly???? I’m kind of torn between that, her being a beta because c’mon you know that’s a rarity in love stories, or alpha because UGH YES CONTRASTING PEOPLE IN/OF POWERRRRR

[thereyvan]

i have WAY too many of these for tags so...here we go... 

-all of Austin, We Have A Problem 

-all of Hand Of God 

-all of the Beat It cover 

-all of Cute Girls 

-all of Love, Selfish Love 

-all of The "I" In Lie 

-all of The Phoenix 

-all of Church 

-all of Heaven's Gate 

-all of Deep Blue Love 

-the bridge and last chorus of Get Busy Living Or Get Busy Dying 

-the last minute or so of Headfirst Slide 

-that part in Greed where he's like "everybody! i wanna see you-" and then does those fucking wet whorish moans 

-the...interlude in When I Made You Cry 

-"i only want sympathy in the form of you crawling into bed with me" 

-"New York eyes, Chicago thighs" 

-"i, i, i, i can't explain a thinggg, and i, i, i, i want everythingggggg" 

-"if home is where the heart is, then we’re all just fucked" 

-"let's meet in the purgatory of my hips and get welllllllll" 

-"the decline of western civilization?" followed by that long, slutty "oh"

-"you should've taught me such naughty things" 

-"so why the hell is there a light that’s keeping us forever-er-er, uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh" 

-"i can't stop it when there's chemicals keeping us together, uhh, uhhhhhhhhh"

-"and your naked magic, oh dear lord" 

-"i wanna see your animaaaaaal side, let it all ouuuuuut" 

-"i want your guts and glory baby, baby, let's get you wasted and aloooooone" 

-"let you suck it out, let you suck it out 'til i'm dry and dead" 

-"mon cheri" and "mi amor" 

-"all those dirty thoughts of me, they were never meant to keep, keep" 

-(whorish panting) "us, we were only meant to make you live again/us, we were pity sex, nothing more and nothing less" 

-"bruises on your thighs like my fingerprints"

-"i never meant for you to fix yoursellllllllllllf"

-"i am the opposite of amnesiaaaaaa"

-(audible smile) "i love you so much, it's just like oxygen" 

down bad so i need to know everyone’s favorite patrick vocal deliveries, like yeah yeah, favorite lyrics we all have em, but like what are the lines that when sung by patrick stump just straight up obliterated your entire fucking brain chemistry

[f4y3w00d5]

Faye Fangirls About My Chemical Romance, Part 1 (Danger Days

Danger Days: True Lives Of the Fabulous Killjoys – Sorta pop punk ig, some more rocky songs

Excluding the ‘songs’ where its just talking

Okay so basically  this is their most recent album, 2014, and it follows the Killjoys as they fight against BL.IND (Better Living Industries) who seek to ELIMINATE all  individuality. (Spoiler: They die saving The Girl in the music video for SING)

Na Na Na (Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na)

Upbeat!!! Dancing!!! Fast!!! You jump around screaming about doing crime and partying and sex!!! I love it!!! (you should listen to it after Look Alive Sunshine, which is the intro to the album and its just Dr D speaking, and at the start of Na Na Na, it goes ‘THE FUTURE IS BULLETPROOF! THE AFTERMATH IS SECONDARY!! TIME TO DO IT NOW AND DO IT LOUD! KILLJOYS, MAKE SOME NOISE!!!’)

Bulletproof Heart

Uh so this is sorta less fast and stuff but its SO cool and idk how to describe it but its sorta jaunty? First song I listened to by the band!!! (Fav part is ‘and tho, I know, how much you hate this. Are you gonna be the one to save us? From. The black. And hope-less feelin. Will you meet ‘em when the end comes reelin? Hold, your heart, into this darkness. Will it ever be the light to shine you out? Or fail. And leave you stranded? I aint gonna be the one left standin. You aint gonna be the one left standin, and we aint gonna be the ones left standin!!!’)

SING

Aaaaaaaaa this ones so cool, took a bit to grow on me, its mostly slow and repetitive but the BRIDGE ‘Cleaned up corporations PROGRESS! Dyin in the PROCESS! Children that can TALK ABOUT IT livin on the WEB-WAYS, people movin SIDEWAYS, sell it til your LAST DAYS, buy yourself the motivation GENERATION NOTHIN! Nothing but a DEAD SCENE! Product of a WHITE DREAM! I am not the SINGER THAT YOU WANTED BUT A DANCER! I REFUSE TO ANSWER! TALK ABOUT THE PAST SIR! WROTE IT FOR THE ONES WHO WANNA GET AWAY! ……. Keep runnin.’

Planetary (GO!)

Okay so like omg. I love this one. Everythings amazin. Starts off slightly slow, and then starts movin faster around the verses? AND THE VIBES!!! Ive got a few favs and ill save them here (I love the way theyre said too-) ‘Ladies and gentleman, truth is now acceptable! Fame! Is now injectable, PROCESS THE PROGRESS, This core is critical, faith is un-a-vail-a-ble, Lives, become incredible-‘ and also ‘Youre unbelievable, ah, so unbelievable, ah, you ruin everything, oh, you better GO HOME! Im unbelievable yeah, im undefeatable yeah, LETS RUIN EVERYTHIN, BLAST IT TO THE BACK ROW- they sell presentable, young! And so ingestible! Sterile and collectable! SAFE, and I cant STAND THAT! This is a letter, by word, is the beretta, the sound, of my vendetta against, the ones that PLANNED IT!’ So uhhhhhhhhh yeah lol

The Only Hope For Me Is You

Likeeeeeeeee holy SHIT this one just sorta- idkkkk- ‘Where? Where were you when, all of the embers fell? I still remember them… covered in ash. Covered in glass. Covered in all my friends, I still… think of the bombs they built- IF THERES A PLACEEE THAT I COULD BE, THEN ID BE ANOTHERR MEMORY, CAN I BE THE ONLY HOPE FOR YOU? BECAUSE YOURE THE ONLY HOPE FOR ME! AND IF WE CAN FIND WHERE  WE BELONG, WE’ll Have To make It on our own!! Face all the painnn and takeee it on, because the only hope for me, is you alone…’ its one of the slower ones tho

Party Poison

This one starts in Japanese for some reason??? Its hard to explain… another fast and dancy type one ig, but sorta raw-er?  Its sooooooo weird- not one of my favs but its semi popular

Save Yourself, I’ll Hold Them Back

Okay so idk how to describe this really- sorta gives Only Hope type thing but faster and sorta rockier? Idk. My fav parts tho!!! ‘Get offfff the ledge, and drop the knife… Not a victim of a victims life! Because… this aint a room fullla suicides- WE’RE BELIEVERSS I BELIEVE TONIGHT-‘ OH AND ONE OF THE MORE POPULAR LINES PEOPLE KNOW ‘Ill tell you well how the story ends, where the good guys die and the bad guys win… (WHO CARES?)- THIS AINT ABOUT ALL THE FRIENDS YOU MADE, BUT THE GRAFFITII THEY WRITE ON YOUR GRAVE-‘ then the last two ‘Im the only friend that makes you cry! Youre a heart attack in black hair dye! So just save yourself, and Ill hold them back tonight….’ And ‘We can live forever if you’ve got the time- YOU MOTHERFUCKER (OHHHWHOAAAA) Youre the broken glass in the mornin light! Be a burnin’ star if it takes all night!’

S/C/A/R/E/C/R/O/W

OHOHOH APPARENTLY THIS ONE IS TO SOOTHE THE KIDS WHEN THE NUCLEAR BOMBS HIT AND GET THEM INTO THE SHELTER!!! (yes there are nuclear bombs, its post apocalyptic lmao) I love the bridge- ‘Love, love, love wont stop this bomb, bomb, love wont stop this bomb, bomb, love wont stop this… bomb……. Run, run, bunny, run. Run, run, bunny ruuuuuuuuuuun’ One of the slowest in the album also

Summertime

Okay so this is prolly my fav? Idk how to describe it tbh….. I know what it describes for me buuuut you don’t wanna hear me be weird about people……. Ill just tell you my fav parts (that I relate to!!!) ‘Terrified of what I’d be, as a kid from what Ive seen… Every single day when people try and put the pieces back together, just to smash them down… turn my headphones up real loud…. I don’t think I need them now…. Cos you stop the noise!!!’

DESTROYA

………………fucked up robot song where you scream and moan. What else is there to say? (the porn bots In the story worship a ‘god’ called Destroya who will supposedly come save them)

The Kids From Yesterday

I love this one too. Sorta slow ig. Nostalgic maybe? ‘Well now, this could be the last of all the rides we take…. So hold on tight and don’t look back……… we don’t care about the message or the rules they make…. Ill find you when the sun goes black…..’

Vampire Money

Dance!!! Sex!! Upbeat!!! Fast!!! ‘Three two one, we came to FUCK-‘ and my other fav line ‘and get your finger on the trigger tap the barrel of the gun! Hair back, motherfucker, jet black, SO COOL-‘

@mayhem-moth

[suntaeshine]

lemmie get uhhhhhhhhh one post-performance backstage soobin smut plsssssssss

dis my bestie go bestie apparently requests are now a drive through service love that energy

Stress Relief

Choi Soobin x Reader

Smut, 18+ MINORS DNI

word count: 1.3k

warnings!: angy soobin, wall sex, kai is a little shit and soobin is Done,

Kai was close to getting choked.

Soobin was close to banging his head against the wall.

Kai, his sweet little maknae, was clingy, tired, emotional, and overall such a handful that Soobin was contemplating locking him in a backstage room before the concert.

"Hyung! Hyung!" Kai calls, voice getting higher and higher with every word.

"Can you go annoy Beomgyu?" 

"But, hyung~" 

It was like taking care of a toddler and Soobin absolutely blames Yeonjun for waking Kai up from his nap earlier this afternoon.

As the door opened, you walked into the room alongside some of the makeup crew. You usually hung around them to not be suspicious- something like the makeup caddy. It helped, of course, that your best friend was the lead artist and always kept you company.

Oh, thank God. Soobin was going to cry in your lap and beg you to get Kai under control- he actually listened to you.

As you help get the cases of makeup, hair supplies, and tools to fix up TXT's faces, Soobin gets closer and closer with each second. Once he was sure there were no cameras, he clings around your waist from behind, making your friend laugh.

"Can I help you?" you question.

"Tell Kai to stop acting like a toddler."

"You're the one wrapped around me like a baby," you tease, turning in his hold.

You ruffle his hair, figuring he was about to get it made up for the show anyway.

A call for the boys to gather makes all five head to separate areas (Kai being tug-of-war'd by Yeonjun and Soobin to sit down).

You were sure to give Soobin his kiss of good luck before and after finishing his makeup then sent him on his way to the stage.

The performance didn’t help. Soobin’s voice cracked a few times and he messed up some of the choreography. Him. Soobin. The leader of this group. His pride and confidence went down the drain. He was the leader and he was screwing up- what kind of picture would people get if the group’s leader was the one making mistakes?

The bathroom door slammed shut behind him and you jumped, turning around to look at him. You’d just praised him and congratulated him on the amazing show. He said nothing to you and told Taehyun to tell others that he had a makeup issue and dragged you to the bathroom.

“Baby, what is it?” you ask, reaching up to cup his cheek.

“Everything is going wrong. Everything is messed up. I messed up,” he rambles, closing his eyes.

“No, no.. Soobin, you did great out there and-”

“Don’t,” he pleads. “I just need to not think about it right now.”

“Okay..” you mumble.

You were about to ask him why standing in the bathroom made it so he didn’t have to think about the tiny mishaps when he grabbed the wrist of your hand on his cheek and tugged you closer.

“Clear my mind, love,” he whispers before gently kissing your neck under your ear.

“Soobin, we’re at work.”

“Concert is over. Work is over,” he mutters against your skin. “Can you please help me out?”

“You can’t wait until we get back to the hotel?”

“The guys will be there. This is our free time.”

You hated that you buckled so quickly.

“Be fast,” you warn.

Soobin grins cheekily, turning you around to face the wall.

“You’re so good to me, you know that?” he asks, flipping your skirt up.

“Okay, lover boy,” you tease, placing your forearms on the wall to stabilize yourself.

Soobin hums and you hear him unbuckle his belt.

“I mean it,” he insists. “Today has been shitty. But, you make it all better. You make all my days better.”

You blush, smiling to yourself. His words always had a way of sending your heart into a flutter.

He knows it, too. That’s the bad thing.

Soobin presses his chest against your back, lips connecting to your neck once more. His hand slides from your side to your front, gently squeezing your breast before massaging his way down. His fingers sneak into your underwear, pads of his fingertips finding that sweet little pearl tucked away between your lips.

“Soobin,” you gasp, closing your eyes and resting your head against your arm.

“My sweet baby,” he sighs happily, free hand gripping your waist to keep you in place.

He’s hardly done anything and you’re in shambles. It’s the small things he does that gets you riled up.

The way he whispers in your ear.

The way he knows all the right spots.

The way he talks to you, like you’re more than special to him.

The way his touch is enough to make you lose your mind.

He whispers more compliments in your ear until you’re whining, pushing his hand out of your underwear and spreading your legs wider.

“Already, baby?” he hums, lowering his boxers.

“Yeah,” you huff. “Come on. Want it now.”

“I’m the needy one right now. That’s not really fair,” he teases.

You don’t verbally reply. Instead, you reach behind yourself, pulling your underwear to the side to show him where you wanted his attention.

Soobin couldn’t help but relent. He needed this. He needed you.

With a grunt, he rubs the tip of his dick over your hole a few times, eyes rolling back in his head once he pushes into you.

Tension left his shoulders and he takes a long deep breath.

“You good?” he makes sure.

“I’m more than good. Please move,” you answer, ready to push yourself off the wall and onto him if he didn’t make a move now.

But, he was already ahead.

It’s a soft roll of his hips first. For a few minutes, he just pulls you back and forth on his dick, enjoying just being inside of you after such a hectic day.

“You still in there, hyung?” Kai asks, knocking on the door.

Fuck. Soobin bites his bottom lip in frustration. He really loved Kai but today was not the day.

“It’s just me!” you call, covering for Soobin.

“Oh.. Sorry, ___! Do you know where hyung went?”

“He mentioned-” you cough as Soobin snaps his dick deep in you.

“What?” Kai asks.

You clench your eyes shut, biting the inside of your jaw as Soobin’s speed picks up.

“Backup dancers!” you force out. “Thanking the back up dancers!”

“Okay, thank you!” Kai calls, moving away merrily without another thought or word.

“Soobin, I’m right there,” you caution, knees shaking.

Soobin hums, wrapping an arm around your waist and front. His other arm reaches down to your knee, pulling you up. You startle at the sudden movement, face planting into the wall as you tried to stay up on one leg.

“That’s it,” Soobin whispers to himself, grinding his hips into yours.

With your face pressed tightly against the wall, all you could do was jerk your bottom half to meet his.

“Coming,” you gasp.

“Go on, baby,” Soobin urges, tightening his grip to pound into you harder and faster.

Your words become null and void as you bite your lip, clench your teeth, and anything else to keep your noises down.

It’s like a warm sun washing over you that drenches you in freezing water- a back and forth feeling that leaves your head spinning as you cum on his dick.

“There’s my baby,” Soobin moans, slowing his pace to drag your orgasm out. “Look so pretty coming undone like this.”

You whimper, tiredly slumping against the wall.

“I’m almost there, love,” Soobin assures.

He pumps into you one more time, as deep as he could get. Slowly, he pulls out and the stimulation of your walls trying to keep him in while being covered in your cum makes him fall apart. He pulls out, cumming on your back.

There’s a pause of silence as you catch your breaths.

“Better?” you ask him.

“So, so..” he kisses your shoulder. “So much better.”

You scoff and he puts your foot back on the ground. You turn just as he’s stuffing his cock back in his pants.

“You’re lucky I love you,” you pester, wrapping your arms around his neck and tugging him down for a proper kiss on the lips.

“Beyond lucky, baby.”

[certified-anakinfucker]

oh shit we’re going back to eighth grade again

thank you @postapocalyptic-cryptic you are the absolute goat for this

uhhhh fun fact about me. fuck uhhhhhhhhh hi my name is cheeri had a phase when i was 6-8 about the 79ad eruption of mt vesuvius + pompeii + herculaneum. then i went to pompeii when i was 13!

tagginf uhh @voidendron @ashesfromfrost @sealeneee @vexa-legacy @eorzeashan @lanabenikosdoormat @firebird-legacy @zabrakghoul @justiceforc3po @zaolan @parseolegacy homies,,,,,,,,

Staring a new post bc the other one was getting long:

Hey this is to all my mutuals! Ala eighth grade introductions, please share a fun fact about yourselves! No pressure, I just find it interesting!

Thank you for the tag @zipquips!

A fun fact about me is that when I was 19, I worked at a garden center where every single employee was gay and the cat was older than me (21)

Tagging @certified-anakinfucker @suborbitalrailgun @gaeasun @soundwavereporting @carelessapples