#we were really hoping to have the verdict by Christmas though which isn’t going to happen

[pynkhues]

sorry you had a tough night :(

Thanks, anon, it’s okay. My sister just rang me in tears and we ended up on the phone for five hours just talking through all this stuff with her divorce again. We’re still waiting for the child custody and relocation verdict to come through (the judge said Dec or Jan), and her ex is just using this window of time to continue to be just - - extremely cruel to her, to put it mildly. It’ll be okay, but I think a lot of it just caught up to her last night, and it’s hard to comfort her when we’re currently in different states. Hopefully that won’t be the case soon though if she wins.

[queer-cat-policy]

Hi! I’m Ace!

Hi, I am ace. Not like the ace of spades but rather ace as in the slang for Asexual. And here I am, telling you, a stranger this. Not just a stranger but many. Writing essays, countless posts, and telling the world as kindly as possible about how I exist is pretty exhausting. But it is more exhausting being invisible. So now I join a movement, an invisible one fighting for visibility, so that maybe, just maybe, we find others like us.

I like to be fully disclosed, I will give you the definition of asexuality but the rest of it is all me. You cannot apply this article to learn about your friends. Maybe, if they are anything like me, you gain some insight, but the reality is, I write this in hopes that someone reading it will feel a little less alone in the world. Maybe this helps you understand that you are not abnormal, instead you are a human being first and foremost and deserve empathy like one. So, what I am saying is, do not take this article as the be all of asexuality. If you have an asexual friend in your life, you should ask them the questions you have with the intention of strengthening your relationship and becoming informed on a topic you previously were not informed about. And if you are asexual and my experiences don’t resonate with you, I encourage you to seek the rest of the community and know you are valid and you are not alone.

What is Asexuality?

Asexuality by itself at its most basic, universal definition, is defined as a lack of sexual attraction. And that’s it. The rest is a spectrum. There are many different types of asexual people, every single one has different experiences and feelings of attraction or may not even feel attraction at all. So we call this a spectrum and some parts of the spectrum have different titles. I think most people have no idea that attraction outside sexual attraction exists, meaning they didn’t know there are other names for attraction. Someone who identifies as asexual but is still attracted to people can feel aesthetic attraction, romantic attraction, physical attraction, emotional attraction, intellectual attraction, social attraction… and the list goes on.

There is something called the A-spectrum which isn’t just asexuality but aromantic, demi romantic, gray romantic, demi sexual, and gray sexual. Demi means that that attraction does not occur until an emotional bond is formed, gray means someone who has limited experiences with that attraction.

What Makes Me Asexual?

Asexuality means something different for every single person who identifies under it and because I can’t name really every type of asexual person out there, I am going to tell you a little bit about myself.

I am asexual because I feel no sexual attraction to anyone. I, in particular, do not want sex and am quite repulsed at the idea of it. I don’t enjoy the sex obsessed culture either and tend not to partake in it. I do however find people attractive for several reasons, it is usually an individual thing. I emotionally bond with people before I feel anything towards them for one. The attraction from there can be emotional or aesthetic. I know what type of personalities I draw in and enjoy interacting with too. I date and have been in about three relationships in my life but only one was long term.

Romantically, I don’t tend to identify. I say this because things change from person to person (as in depending on the individual I am attracted to). I will usually umbrella myself following the explanation of my asexual identity, stating that I am queer alongside being asexual or if I’m not comfortable talking about my asexuality, I leave it at queer. I say queer because I am attracted to different people for different reasons and sometimes gender isn’t necessarily a discriminating factor. I have mostly emotionally bonded with men in the past, but I find women physically and aesthetically attractive. Additionally, I am not exclusively attracted to men or women, I also can be attracted to transgender and non-binary people.

Is Asexuality in LGBT?

The Asexual community gets a lot of ping pong discussion about rather or not we are apart of the LBGTQIA+ Community. Some people believe that if you are just asexual and hetero-romantic and cis… then you should not be identifying as part of the LGBTQIA+ Community. I won’t get to deep into it, but the truth is, the A is for the asexual spectrum, not just the queer asexual folks. And we too have struggles, some much like the rest of the community and some very different. To leave out asexual people is aphobic in my personal opinion and a gatekeeping tactic. I one time read someone who was upset that the community had become like “the island of misfit toys.” I won’t tell you what to believe about this, but I’ll definitely talk about this in later posts so if you’re interested in reading more about it, keep an eye out!

The Fears of Asexuals…

We live in a sex obsessed culture. Sex is literally everywhere. It is in music, TV, movies, school, social life, work, art, commercials, food----- This culture is absolutely thriving (this is not a good thing) off of the exploitation of sexuality. Especially of women. If you can’t understand the problem with this, imagine hating the super bowl around Thanksgiving or Christmas at… well Christmas, when every store, elevator, billboard, TV series, and artist is throwing Christmas in your face. Except for asexual people, this is our life everyday we wake up and live in the world. Every. Day.

Because everyone around us is so obsessed with sex, asexual people can feel overwhelmingly alone. And for those seeking a significant other, that is a legitimate fear. Everyone else around us in relationships all require the one thing we will not give: Sex. You’ll never guess the number of times I get unmatched on dating apps after someone asks me what asexual means or after the first time I mention it outside my profile… because I guess if I don’t say anything than all the flags on my profile that include my sexual identity can be potentially false?

Asexual people, because many of us are very uncultured in sexual cues and such, are also at risk of being sexually abused and assaulted. Asexual people have gotten into situations where they are legitimately sexually attacked either because they have rejected someone or someone tries to change them by forcing themselves on them, or because they miss cues. Remember though if you have been sexually assaulted it is not your fault. There is no “what if I did this differently.” We are trained currently to be blameful of ourselves in sexual assault situations. But the fact is, if you did not consent to it- if there was no clear/in the right mind consent to it- it should not have happened and there is absolutely no excuse on the attacker’s part that should change that verdict.

Another part to being in a sex obsessed culture is just the sheer disbelief that people exist that do not want it. Rather it is for the intimacy or instincts, it will truly awestruck people of all kinds to the point they may tell us that we are not real. Not valid. Every asexual person has heard “you haven’t found the right person,” “How do you know if you’ve never had it,” “you can’t be asexual, you have a significant other,” “Love can’t really exist without sex,” “you’re just scared.” And we think about these things like ‘what if,’ and let other people’s invalidation of our identities invalidate ourselves.

Asexual Relationships?

It is a common misconception that asexual people do not date or do not have these kinds of intimate relationships. It is true that some people who identify as asexual also identify as aromatic or choose not to date or seek intimate relationships, but this does not describe the entire asexual community. Some asexual people will only date other asexual people, some do not. Asexual people in non-asexual relationships may come to a compromise in that relationship or vice versa. But it is incredibly important to remember that what matters most is that both parties are being satisfied. That may mean we discover that this partner is not the one. The needs need to be met on both sides.

As previously mentioned, there are a lot of people who think love must come with sex. You are more likely to come across someone with that mindset on the street than not. I personally try to meet people via online dating, and I would not say I have been 100% successful or unsuccessful. I have made several friends, I have had a boyfriend, I have done a lot of dating, I’ve also been unmatched as soon as they realize I am not wanting to sleep with them. That can be extremely… demeaning. And bad for self-esteem. I wrote something a little about how it feels to be consistently rejected for being asexual. I get rejected sometimes before people even know what asexual is. They know it is something from the LGBTQIA+ Community, it’s not straight, it’s not normal. And yes, maybe I shouldn’t want to be with someone like that but it feels like there are more people like that than not and there is no cure for the overwhelming fear that I will end up alone. It also creates an uncertain anxiety when I do not know why I may have been rejected. My brain defaults to “it’s because I’m asexual” and I go through the same devastation I would if I knew for sure it’s because I am asexual.

On the other side are the people who decide to date an asexual with the intention of being the one to “fix us.” Or they think it will change- because ultimately, they don’t believe in asexuality. Or they think it is personal, like instead of me being repulsed by sex I am repulsed by the person. For me, since I am not a very physically affectionate person (even when I am that comfortable with someone, it is very limited), that’s more common than I ever thought possible. That kind of says something about our society more than the individual, in my personal opinion. It says that our society as values our sexuality (especially as women) more than other parts of our personality.

Something I will include in here, friendships. A lot of my friends do not know how to talk about my sexuality. They don’t know what it is, it makes them uncomfortable, they think they have to give me the sex ed run down, or they think I have to be in PG settings all the time to be comfortable. No, I don’t necessarily want to hear in detail about your sex life but if there’s something you want to tell me, I’m not a fragile flower you have to protect. Friends also may constantly bring up my sexuality in an environment where it may not be comfortable. My friends have sometimes flaunted it like a golden ticket, like a token queer friend. I have to tell them to stop and if they don’t, I have to reconsider our friendship. Our sexual orientations are personal, no matter how out and forward we are, it belongs to us, to you. Coming out belongs to you and it is never insignificant enough to deserve to happen against your own free will.

Dear Ace Community Let’s Communicate!

The last thing I want to add here is just a suggestion for the asexual community. I see a lot of people who post about the exhaustion that comes with having to constantly re-explain ourselves to partners, friends, people of interest… Stop being exhausted. Do not tell them to google it. Someone is trying to understand you, googling is not understanding you. Take it as a compliment and be ready to explain and advocate for yourself and our community. Communication is so important. Google does not tell that person who you are, especially because we are on such a wide spectrum. I advise strongly against it. And probably, when you have to have that conversation, don’t have it over text. At least for me, I say so many more meaningful things when it’s face to face or over the phone at the very least versus over text message. I’m not just being a parrot of information from what I know the internet has told me, I’m telling that person about myself and what it means for me to be asexual. Communicate what it means for you to be asexual.

If you have an asexual friend, don’t be afraid of them. Know that you can’t change who they are, they don’t want you to try, you can’t “fix them.” If you don’t understand them, ask questions and don’t be critical.

Thank you so much for reading! If you have any question, reach out on my tumblr or contact page!

[scarlettlawyer]

This is fanfiction of a fanfiction! Specifically, the Phantoms and Mirages fanfiction series by Meowzy (renegadewangs on tumblr), which can be found over at AO3! This post’s fic contains SPOILERS for the series up until the end of Lifting Spirits, the fourth installment. If you have not read the Phantoms & Mirages series up until at least the end of Lifting Spirits, it will not make a lick of sense to you either! So I would highly recommend checking the series out first if you would like to give this post a read. I would still recommend checking it out if you don’t want to give this post a read too! :P

Anyway here is the little thing I wrote just in case others would like to read it :)

-------------------

Date: December 25th 2028 Time: 10:14 AM Location: Wright Anything Agency.

It was Christmas morning, and it had been six days since his client had been handed down the death sentence in court.

The execution had already been carried out, he’d heard. Just as swiftly as the court’s verdict promised.

Phoenix Wright wasn’t feeling especially festive, but it was Christmas, so putting a smile on his face and doing his best to carry on as usual was the least he could do. He had to, at least for Trucy’s sake. It wouldn’t be fair to let recent grim events detract from her celebrating and enjoying today.

But he supposed he couldn’t act like this was just like any other Christmas, either. They’d rarely seen Athena in the past few days – she had taken the outcome of the trial especially hard.

And Apollo…

There’d been friction as of late. That was undeniable, and impossible to avoid. He’d starkly disagreed with his and Athena’s actions starting back when they’d acted as the Phantom’s defense team, but he’d soon learned afterwards how that had all been a ploy, and then Apollo had quickly understood, any discontent completely washed away.

It had been for a good cause, after all – to ensure that the spy known as Mirage was caught and faced justice. The Phantom’s role in that trial had only been relevant insofar as it had furthered that goal; it had nothing to do with Phoenix and Athena actually supporting him or advocating on his behalf outside of that. Once Apollo realised that, he’d been at ease once more and all was well.

The trial for Alexander Luster Jr., though, that was different. There was no ploy; it was a completely genuine and earnest attempt to seek a second chance to be granted for a man to turn his life around for the better, and for him to have a future. Athena and Phoenix had actively chosen to stand by that man’s side and fight for his second chance.

And that core stance was the source of the fundamental and insurmountable disagreement between Apollo and the two of them. Apollo could not, and would not understand their decision to advocate for that second chance. Phoenix couldn’t entirely blame him, and it would be unfair to expect Apollo to understand.

It didn’t matter now; they’d lost, in the end. Alexander Luster Jr., the Phantom, whatever you wanted to call him, was dead now. Apollo’s stance had ultimately won out and it was the one that the court system had officially endorsed. 

—————- 

Date: December 19th 2028 Time: 12:04 PM Location: District Court – Courtroom No. 4.

He continued to stand by the defense’s bench in the wake of the verdict, motionless and paralysed, as his client was carried away screaming, forced towards his impending death. 

There was nothing Phoenix could do but stand there uselessly. His mind was blank as the chaos went on around him.

And just like that, his client had been taken away, but the impact of the day’s events was still unfolding everywhere in the courtroom.

Whenever he was involved in a case, the court had never really come to the wrong decision before. Even when losing a case, there hadn’t been any issue because it was the correct and just outcome. The only other time the outcome of a trial he’d defended in had felt so utterly wretched and bleak and wrong was when he’d lost his badge.

His badge…

A very dark moment passed over him. If he couldn’t ensure a just outcome, if he couldn’t protect his client, then what was the point? Why stand in court?

He stood frozen, and the sudden mad urge to tear off his badge subsided. There was no way he could cast it aside so easily, not after everything he’d been through. That wouldn’t be right either. He couldn’t do that to Trucy. And Edgeworth had done so much to help him and to get it back.

To throw it all away… it was something he felt that he probably would have done many years ago, if he hadn’t been able to bring Matt Engarde to justice. But this situation wasn’t quite so dire, and back then he hadn’t had a daughter and two apprentices to think about. Back then, he’d never experienced having his badge taken away from him either, hadn’t suffered so much and for so long before he could get it back again.

But ultimately, what did this symbolic representation of his membership to the legal profession even amount to? He’d been proven useless in the end. It was all futile. He was supposed to act as an agent of the law to ensure justice for all. It was supposed to result in justice for everyone, but… Phoenix wasn’t so sure what to think about that anymore.

Still, he had duties that he was bound by. Duties to the people around him, and to carry on with his work… he just needed to make sure he didn’t suddenly find himself entrapped by the very things that used to feel freeing.

Time passed, and the courtroom grew to be practically empty. He didn’t know how long he’d been standing there, but it must have been a while.

He started to walk. It was an aimless gesture with no real intent, hardly paying attention to where his feet might be carrying him.

“Daddy, there you are…! Polly and I, we found-”

“-Athena,” Phoenix said automatically upon catching sight of her. She was looking quite the worse for wear, and Apollo was standing by her side, awkwardly trying to offer support.

“Hey, it’s okay, I’m here for you. It doesn’t have to be like this. You don’t have to be sad. There’s no use crying over him - think of how much the Phantom has taken from us all. He can’t hurt anyone anymore, now. It’s over and it’s best we all move on… There was never really any other way. This was necessary for-”

“You don’t GET to decide when someone’s life ending is NECESSARY, Apollo!”

Apollo started back in shock, Athena’s sudden fierce tone forcing him into silence as she continued.

“Do you think that his death will magically make the past better? Can it undo anything that’s already been done?! Who are you to decide that a human life should be offered up as some kind of,” she waved her hand about wildly, “sacrificial stepping stone for your own personal development to make you feel better? Execution doesn’t bring back the dead. It only adds to the death! Another lifeless body thrown upon the pile.”

Widget had turned from dark blue to red in a flash at Apollo’s words, before reverting back to a deep blue once more. Evidently, Apollo hadn’t expected his attempt to console her to be met with such defiant anger. After a few moments, his response came, unusually quiet, but firm and resolute.

“You’re right. It’s not for me to decide. It’s for the courts to decide. And a conclusion has already been reached for this case. It’s not about feeling better – it’s about what’s right, and what needs to be done. It’s about justice. The sooner you see that, the sooner you can heal.”

“You think-,” she broke off, her voice struggling with the effort it took stave off sobs. “You call this justice? Lex – didn’t want – to h-hurt anyone! He just wanted - to live! He was a – new person, and-,” she then shook her head, breathing heavily. “I’ve gotta go.” At that, she rushed out the door.

Apollo sighed, his expression dismayed and stern. “She’s too far gone,” Phoenix heard him mutter to himself.

“Apollo-”

“No, Mr Wright. Do you expect me to feed the idealistic fantasies she’s constructed? Because I can’t. It’s not healthy… For either of us. I just can’t- I mean, don’t you think… things have been hard enough as it is? Every now and then, I still find myself checking my phone on occasion, expecting to see a new message from Clay… Out of habit. Even thinking about that… Phantom is a constant painful reminder. I’m sick of it - I don’t want to have to hear about that killer anymore, and I shouldn’t have to.”

Apollo paused to catch his breath and calm down somewhat, and Phoenix let him.

“’Who am I to decide’…? Who was the Phantom to decide that ending Clay’s life – anyone’s life was necessary? There’s no use… distorting things into such a one-sided picture, because life doesn’t discriminate. It doesn’t matter who you are, in the end. What’s done is done, and everyone needs to be held to equal standards of accountability for their own actions. Isn’t that what justice is? No one is so special that they are above the law, yet even you seem to need reminding of that right now. She should know – and we should know this better than anyone. We’re lawyers. This is how our legal system works!”

Alexander Luster’s final, terrified and desperate screams that had filled the air as he begged and pleaded for his life before he was dragged from the courtroom were still ringing in his mind, branded deeply, haunting him with the horror of a life knowingly about to be cut off. The inherent horror of the awareness there must be, that it was your life at its end, your life that you barely knew.

This is how… their legal system works.

This can’t be right.

It shouldn’t have ended like this. It was his fault. He could have prevented this. He could have done more. He could have saved a life, if he’d just tried harder.

It was all… wrong.

“…I’m sorry, Apollo. This is one case where… we won’t be able to see eye to eye. We don’t have to agree on this; you don’t have to understand. Right now, I think we should just give each other space.”

Apollo’s mouth set in a grim line. “Fine. Next I see you, I hope you’ll have actually regained some of your senses.” And with that, he stormed off.

Maybe Apollo was right, in a sense. Maybe the system was working exactly as it was supposed to. The courts would swallow up input, spit out a result, and whatever that result happened to be the citizens are demanded to gaze upon it and call it “justice”. If it pleased or displeased the masses, then so be it. Maybe, on some level, the idea was that the result didn’t have to make sense. Maybe there just had to be one, so that everyone else would then be free to go home and carry on with their lives, their legal truths set in stone.

—————-

Date: December 25th 2028 Time: 10:21 AM Location: Wright Anything Agency.

The next he did see Apollo after that, neither of them had said a word about the incident.

It would be wrong for Phoenix to hold Apollo’s feelings about it all against him, and he didn’t. Apollo had lost his best friend. And Apollo knew that the verdict had dealt a blow to both Athena and Phoenix. Even if he clearly disapproved and thought that the Phantom wasn’t worth anyone’s time up until the very end, he made a point of doing his best to not say anything that would exacerbate the strain that was present or add any unnecessary grief, after that instance gone awry. It was an unspoken intent to keep the peace amongst them; neither would voice any of the internal thoughts that may upset the other when in their presence.

Lessons had been learned when Apollo had unintentionally overstepped, but Athena had been the first one to apologise when they’d crossed paths the next day. She apologised for yelling at him, and he apologised for unintentionally making things worse, and they were able to leave it at that.

Even so, their interactions had been rather stiff as of late. After all, there was still the uncomfortable fact hanging over the three of them that Apollo was pleased with the very same verdict that had left Athena crying out desperately, even attempting to stop the Interpol agents from taking the former spy away. So much for the Wright Anything Agency all coming together for Christmas…

So there it was: Apollo was happy with the outcome. Athena was devastated. And Phoenix, well…

Phoenix still personally disagreed with Apollo and could not internalise the Judge’s decision as the right one.

So here he was, still a lawyer, on Christmas morning. He was acting cheerful, and so was Trucy. She’d loved her presents, just as Phoenix had hoped, and hugged him enthusiastically as she’d thanked him. But Trucy was a smart girl and must have known not everything was currently as well as it could be, and that relations among the Wright Anything Agency had seen better days. Maybe, to some extent, she was actively injecting enthusiasm into her demeanour for that reason, too.

He just needed to keep staving off the depressing thoughts. He had time… time to come to terms with the verdict, and what it might mean, on some other day. Today was for focusing on family.

Suffice it to say, given everything, he hadn’t been expecting Athena to march right through the door with such lightness and energy to her demeanour.

“Merry Christmas!” she exclaimed, a bright grin settling on her face. She dumped a bag on the floor which Phoenix could see contained some wrapped gifts.

“Merry Christmas, Athena! Good to see you,” Trucy beamed.

“So what’s the go, Boss? I sure hope you’ve got a big Christmas lunch on the way, ‘cause I’m hungry!”

Phoenix rubbed the back of his neck and grinned sheepishly, a little taken off-guard. He hadn’t even had the chance to greet her yet! “W-wait, but if you’re hungry, didn’t you have anything this morning?”

Athena reached up to tap at her earring, causing it to sway. “Well, I did have brunch just earlier with Simon and Bobby, but… The point is, I know I will be hungry once it’s lunchtime!” She thrust a peace sign in Phoenix’s direction and continued, “Big meals are an essential part of Christmas, anyway!”

Phoenix might have thought that she was forcing some kind of cheerful act, were it not for the fact that Widget was glowing green with genuine happiness. But even if it wasn’t for that, he would have been hard-pressed to deny the essential truth that her high spirits seemed to ring with.

“So, um… Where’s Apollo?” she asked, her tone softening a little.

“Ah,” was all Phoenix offered in reply.

“Maybe… you should give him a call? Invite him over. That’s- if he’s not busy with other plans, that is. We can’t have a Wright Anything Agency Christmas party without him, after all.”

“Hah, there’s nothing Polly could be too busy with that he can’t drop it all at a moment’s notice to see us! Isn’t that right, Daddy?” Trucy urged.

“Ahaha, I guess there’s only one way to find out.”

—————-

Date: December 25th 2028 Time: 1:34 PM Location: Wright Anything Agency.

As it turned out, although Apollo was involved in other plans and couldn’t leave immediately, he had promised to be there in the afternoon. He should be arriving any minute, now.

It was strange; Phoenix really hadn’t thought they’d be able to salvage the day to this extent, but here they were. It was just as it should be – everyone was upbeat, Apollo was on his way over, and they could all forget any troubles. Phoenix didn’t need to pretend to be upbeat as they played makeshift games and unwrapped more presents. It was just a shame that Edgeworth wouldn’t be arriving until a bit later, too, but once he did, there’d still be all the rest of the afternoon and the evening to spend together at the Wright Agency Christmas party.

Speaking of which, he’d needed to leave the main room to take a phone call from Edgeworth. It had gone on for longer than planned, and he stopped himself just before stepping back into the room once the call was over, not wanting to intrude on the solemn exchange of words that seemed to be taking place between Athena and Trucy.

“-was so worried. You’re sure you’re okay?” Trucy was saying.

Phoenix hadn’t meant to overhear that, but in truth, this had been nagging at the back of his mind as well. It seemed odd for Athena to have bounced back to normal so quickly… And the worst of times are when lawyers have to force their biggest smiles.

“Don’t worry about me. I’m fine, I promise.”

Trucy nodded. “…Alright, I believe you.”

“Besides, today’s not the day to go around being gloomy… But thank you. It’s touching that you care.”

And when Trucy left the room to get some materials prepared for an elaborate magic trick so it could be ready for Apollo’s arrival, it was Phoenix’s turn to speak to Athena one-on-one.

“I’ve been meaning to ask. You said you had brunch with Blackquill and Agent Fulbright this morning, didn’t you? How… How are they?”

“Ohh…” Athena seemed to think carefully for a moment, searching for the right words. “I think… they’re going to be okay. I think they’re going to be just fine.”

“Hmm…” I’m sorry, he wanted to say, I feel like I let them both down. And I let you down, too. But there was something holding him back. “And what about you?”

“Me? Come on, Boss. I know you heard what I said to Trucy earlier – you’re not that subtle with your eavesdropping, you know. I’m alright, and how could I not be? It’s Christmas Day and I’ve been spending it with my friends.”

Ahh, caught red-handed, it seemed. “But, aren’t you… sad?” he tried. Something still didn’t seem to add up.

“Of course I’m sad–”

… Interesting.

“-but there’s a time and a place for sadness. I don’t want to be all miserable right now. I don’t want to focus on less pleasant things. So, let’s continue enjoying the rest of today. …Mr. Wright?”

“R-Right! You’re right.” His phone beeped. “Ah… Apollo will be here in five minutes.”

In actuality, Apollo arrived in three minutes’ time, bearing presents of his own. After responding to Trucy’s enthusiastic welcome, there was a brief awkward silence when he caught sight of Athena.

“…Hey, Apollo,” she said, holding out a present done up in shiny red wrapping, “got you a gift!”

“Athena! Mr. Wright said you were here, but I thought-,” he shook his head. “…Thank you. Merry Christmas.”

Just like that, everything felt so normal again, among everyone.

It was a crazy thought, but

…Maybe, somehow, everything had all worked out in the end. There was something about Athena’s demeanour that put him at ease, allowing him to trust that all was well… it allowed him to trust in justice.

Maybe, he didn’t quite have the full picture. That was alright with him; he didn’t need to pry any further.

In this case, just the idea of it was enough. 

[strangerfictions]

Don’t Punch Me

Summary: You stuck up for Nancy by punching Steve but eventually you become friends. When Nancy breaks up with Steve he turns up on your door. Whats said that night changes you both. 

Warnings: A little bit of violence, a mention of broken bones and blood and some fluff.

Words: 3803

A/N: Okay so this is based of a text post I found on tumblr which I have typed out below. I loved the story behind it and so I decided I wanted to write a fic based off of it. This takes place from season one when Steve spray paints the things about Nancy on the cinema through to after season 3. As always requests are open!

Prompt : In elementary school I hit this kid cause he said I can’t punch and I broke his nose and then my stepdad picked me up and the office was like “you have to say sorry” but then the kid was like “but she proved me wrong, she doesn’t have to say sorry” ladies and gentlemen my best friend of many many years.

You were driving into school when Nancy told you about the weekend. You never really liked Nancy but he had made her happy for a while and so you got over it but now you don’t care you are going to sort this once and for all.

When you pulled into school you see Steve walking in the doors just before you and so you know you would catch him at his locker. Nancy ran after you begging you to drop it, but he had to be taught a lesson.

“No way Nance. He isn’t getting away with this!” You could feel the anger build inside of you catching a glimpse of Tommy and Steve in front of you.

You walk up behind Tommy and slam Steve’s locker shut narrowly missing his hand which causes both of them to look at you stunned.

“What the hell Y/L/N” Steve shouts instantly regretting it seeing the anger in your face

“Don’t ‘what the hell me’ Harrington you know exactly why I’m here. How could you do that to Nancy! You really are living up to your name douchbag” you notice people are starting to gather around you.

“You really think because you have great hair and hang around with Tommy that you’re perfect well I’ve got news for you Harrington your not in fact your far from it. You’re a dick and everyone knows it!”

“Look isn’t the fact that Jonathan beat me up enough. Anyways you’re not capable of punching m…”

Without even thinking your fist flies up and connects with Steve’s nose. The deafening crack echoing through the hallway as everyone chants at you both. Blood dripping everywhere as Steve’s hand goes straight up to his nose. Both him and Tommy too in shock to say anything.

“If I hear of you slut shaming any girl ever again Harrington it won’t be your nose you have to worry about!”

You walk away pushing through the crowds that had gathered finding Nancy and Jonathon at your locker.

“I’m sorry Nance but…” You begin to say before she wraps her arms around your neck pulling you into a hug.

“Thanks for sticking up for me. You didn’t have to, but I appreciate it!” Nancy says as she pulls away from the hug.

“It’s fine. Pretty sure I broke his nose so with the black eye and split lip Jonathan gave him I’m pretty sure he has received the message loud and clear!” You say laughing at Jonathans reaction

“Y/N…your hand” Jonathan whispers grimacing at the sight before him.

You look down seeing a small puddle of blood on the ground from your hand. Raising your hand, you see that your hand is completely out of shape and cut on the knuckles.

“Right well I better go to the Nurses office to get something for this before the adrenaline wears off” You smile at both of your friends and walk to the Nurses office.

“I can’t believe she punched me…she actually punched me dude” You can hear Steve muttering Tommy as the nurse patches him up.

“Well I mean you did provoke her dude” Tommy laughs as you walk into the Nurses office.

“Sorry Ms Sanchez could I get a bandage and gauze please?” you see Steve looks over to you and your hand a hint of remorse in his eyes.

“Let me guess that hand is responsible for this broken nose?” Ms Sanchez smiles at as she stands up walking towards where the bandages are.

You smile at her knowing she won’t pry. The 5 minutes it takes for her to wrap up your hand is the most uncomfortable 5 minutes in your life. You can feel both Steve and Tommy watching you as Ms Sanchez gives you the verdict that you do in fact have a broken hand. She cleans your cuts and wraps your hand with gauze and a bandage and tells you that you need to go to hospital.

By the time you were called to the principal’s office you were in the middle of 5th period and you and Nancy were in physics trying to figure out an experiment. You walk into the office to see Steve sitting beside a man who you assume is his dad and beside him is your stepdad. Great you think this is all you need. A broken hand and a suspension.

You sit beside your stepdad who begins to whisper at you asking you everything and when you told him everything, he slapped you on the back telling you that it was the right thing to do and that he was proud of you. He never condoned fighting but when sticking up for yourself or others then he is all for it.

Your principle had said he would let you away without punishment if you apologised but before you could argue Steve was speaking.

“No, she doesn’t have to. She had the right to punch me and plus she kinda proved me wrong. I had said she wouldn’t punch me and then she did so yeah, no hard feelings. I just want this over with” You look at Steve stunned not knowing what to do or say but you just leave it. You feel a pang in your heart but you just put it down to the adrenaline and forget about it. Your principle is happy enough with that and you are both allowed to leave.

That was all you could remember of that day. You knew you ended up in ER that night to get your suspected broken hand checked out but other than that you couldn’t really remember much thanks to the pain killers.

Of course, Steve and Nancy ended up back together before Christmas and so you put your pride behind you and you walked up to Steve’s locker after Christmas to apologise.

“Hi” you mutter hoping not to draw too much attention

“Uhh hey Y/L/N” He looks at you confused wondering why you are at his locker and weither or not you are going to punch him.

“Look you and Nance are back together so I just want to call it truce. I’m sorry for punching you but let’s face it you kind of deserved it anyway yeah I’m sorry” you ramble not really knowing where you were going this whole time.

“Oh…okay yeah sounds good to me. I kind of thought we sorted it in the principles office that day but thanks for apologising but you’re right I did deserve it. I wasn’t myself back then and if being beaten up twice helps me learn that then I’ll take it but please don’t punch me again. My nose hasn’t been the same since” Steve grimaces thinking about it

“Yeah I don’t plan on it anyways I guess I’ll see you around Harrington”

Over the next few months you and Steve become good friends despite the fact that him and Nancy had started to drift. You really didn’t know why they were holding out. Maybe because Steve really was in love with her but you really didn’t know.

“I can’t wait for Tina’s party this weekend. It will be so great to just relax and actually have a break from homework. You should go Y/N it will be great!” Steve says taking a bite out of his apple.

“I’m not really in the mood for Tina’s parties to be honest Steve. It never ends well for someone!” You say pushing your food around your plate as you look over to Nancy who you can tell is in deep thought.

“Yeah I guess so. I bet that new guy is going to try and cause trouble” Steve says through mouthfuls of apple. He looks over at Nancy noticing that she hadn’t even touched her lunch yet.

“Ehmm I’ll see you guys later I need to get some stuff out of my locker” You decide to leave them to it. You knew Nancy had been different since they decided to get back together, but you never really brought it up, but you knew deep down what was causing this change. You knew after everything that happened, she was a different person and so was Steve and it was beginning to become noticeable. You just hoped they could work it out or end it on good terms. You didn’t want to have to pick sides.

It was the night of Tina’s party and you were glad you hadn’t gone. You had loads of homework due on Monday and so tonight was the perfect time to get it done. Your room was quiet except for the soft sound of Queen playing through your record player. The small desk lamp was the only thing illuminating you as you worked. It was about half eleven by the time you were finished. You began putting your books away when you hear something hit your window. Once…twice…three times. You walk over thinking it was just the wind but to your surprise Steve is standing outside.

You open your window but you cant help notice his eyes are red and puffy as if he had been crying.

“Steve? Hold on let me go open the door?” You walk down the stairs hoping your parents are fast asleep. You don’t know how you would explain Steve being in your house at this time of the night. When you open the door, you get a closer look at Steve. His hair has fallen slightly so small pieces were falling into his face and his eyes looked like he had been crying for hours. Instead of saying anything he just pulls you in for a hug.

“What happened?” You whisper as he rests his head in the crook of you neck.

“She broke up with me…bullshit she said…everything is bullshit. I’m not surprised though. I mean I don’t know why she even took me back all I am is a loser.” Your heart broke as he said this.

Over the past few months you noticed that Steve was never really as confident as he pretended. He was actually very insecure and so this was quite possibly the breaking point for him. You knew you would have to be there for him through this. He no longer had many friends and the fact that he turned up on your doorstep meant he considered you a friend as much as you considered him one.

“Steve you’re not a loser. Come on we can talk about it upstairs” You take his hand pulling him upstairs trying to avoiding the creaky step on you way.

You tell Steve to lay down and rest and talk you through what happened while you get a few things. As he is telling you everything that went down at the party your heart breaks more and more. The more you heard about what Nancy said the more anger you felt towards her. You had really hoped the two of them would deal with this like adults because you knew it would break Steve more than her.

“I’m sorry Steve I really am. I had noticed Nancy was being a little off, but I really didn’t think it would come down to this. Here” You place a cold cloth over his eyes as you continue to talk to him queen still playing in the background.

“I mean you were right last year. I was a dick to her so what do I expect. I’m getting a taste of my own medicine and now I know how she feels” Steve sniffles as his body shakes from being upset.

“Yes, you were but you’ve learnt. It may have taken two different people to beat you up, but you did and that shows you’re a good guy Steve any girl would be lucky to have you!” You say placing your hand on his. He sits up pulling the cloth of his eyes and looking at you. Your heart skips a little but you try to ignore it.

“Would you?” he whispers

“What?” You ask hoping this wasn’t going where you thought it was.

“Never mind” He lays back down staring at the ceiling

“Yes” You say lying beside him and grabbing his hand to comfort him. You weren’t sure if you were telling him to comfort him or you really meant it.

“But you need some time out of a relationship Steve. I think you need to grow comfortable with yourself before another relationship” You say glancing over at him to gauge his reaction

“Your right and I know your right, but I can’t help think what if you know. What if it doesn’t happen now and some douche like Billy Hargrove comes along and swoops you off your feet what then?”

“Well if it makes you feel any better Hargrove isn’t my type…far from it actually. I prefer the guys who don’t win the fights…that’s my department” You both laugh thinking back on last year.

“I’m not promising anything in terms of relationships, but I am promising to be friends” You sit up and walk over to your wardrobe pulling out extra blankets and pillows.

“You can stay tonight. You are way too upset to drive anywhere” You throw the pillows and blankets on the bed helping him get comfortable.

Once Steve is settled in the other side of your bed, he already begins to fall asleep. You took him in and say goodnight with a kiss on the forehead. You tell yourself it’s a friendly kiss, but you know better than that. The way your body was reacting to things tonight really made you question things with Steve. You really couldn’t think about this tonight. You were way too tired and he dated your best friend.

The next morning you wake up to an empty bed and a note on your desk thanking you for everything and that he would call he later. He had signed it with his initial and 3 kisses which made you smile. You had the whole day to yourself and your thoughts and so you began to think about Steve and what you had both talked about the night before. Did Steve really like you or was he just upset. Did you like Steve or were you just being nice. No, you couldn’t like Steve you broke his nose, but you knew that he has changed since he stopped hanging around Tommy. Before you could think any more on it the phone rang. Too early to be Steve you thought.

“Hello?”

“Y/N It’s Nancy”

“Oh, hi Nancy” You say it a little too formally and you mentally kick yourself for being weird.

“I just wanted to tell you that both Steve and I broke up. It was for the best, but I just don’t want you to feel you have to pick sides it really wasn’t that bad of a breakup” you can clearly hear her lying even if you didn’t know what Steve had told you last night.

“Nancy you and I both know that’s bullshit. I don’t want to take side either, but I had a heartbroken Steve on my doorstep at half eleven last night crying his eyes out blaming himself for this when we all know you were the one to blame this time. I know you’ve had a thing for Jonathan for a while, but you could have saved Steve the humiliation Nancy. You made him feel like he was worthless and a piece of shit all because you have feelings for someone else. I really get that he was a dick to you but you could have done it a little gentler!” You say it so fast and hang up that you don’t even have time to process what you said. Nancy could be really selfish sometimes and this is one of her shining moments. You don’t even know why you hang out with her anymore. She has changed since the whole Barb situation and you don’t blame her but you really don’t see this friendship lasting.

You decide to make some food but before you can even move your phone is ringing again.

“What Nanc..” you snap

“Oh, sorry is this not a good time Y/N” You hear Steve coil back into himself

“Shit sorry Steve. I just had a bit of a heated argument with Nancy is all. I thought you were her calling again” you sigh pulling over the foot stool to sit on.

“Oh. I hope it wasn’t about me because I really don’t want you taking sides. That’s far from what I want you to do actually!” You can hear the panic in Steve’s voice at the thought of you fighting over him.

“I think that ship has sailed Steve I really do. She was selfish to make you think you were the one to blame when you weren’t. Sorry I don’t know why I’m getting so worked up over this”

But you did know. Somehow over the past few months you had started to catch feelings for Steve. Every time he laughed at one of your jokes or did something small you were growing more and more in love with him and you weren’t even aware of it. You decide it was best not to bring this up right now for Steve’s sake as much as yours.

Eventually you helped Steve get over Nancy and slowly he began to come back to himself. You both were now best friends and did everything together. Fighting demigorgans…check. Babysitting the party…check. Fighting weird Russians…check. Despite doing all of this there was a weird tension between you and others were starting to notice it. Robin was the first to notice it when the three of you hung out for the first time.

She brought it up to you one day when Steve was making popcorn for movie night and you decided to tell her about your feeling for him and she told you to tell him and so you set up a plan for three days later. You were all going to a party and you were going to tell him then. Alcohol and feelings what could go wrong.

You had asked Robin to come over and get ready with you because if you didn’t have someone to push you out the door you wouldn’t ever tell him. By the time Steve arrived you and Robin were already a little tipsy from your stepdad’s whiskey.

“You’ll be fine. Just take him to a quiet place and tell him. Easy!” Robin says as you both walk down the stairs.

Robin pulls open the door to see Steve leaning against the wall. His hair is done to perfection and he looks really great. You can feel the butterflies in your stomach begin and you just hope you don’t get sick.

“Robin! I thought you were meeting us there?” he questions looking behind her for you, but you were still stood on the stairs.

“Yeah change of plan dingus. Y/N needed a little girl advice on outfits, so we are now both a little tipsy on whiskey”

“Lucky for you though Steve I can handle my drink unlike someone else I know” You grab Robins hand pulling her towards the door.

“You look great Y/N!” Steve smiles at you. You drop Robins’ hand to pull the door closed but Steve already has it.

“Thanks, you look great too! It’s so great to see you back to yourself Steve!” You genuinely mean this. You saw Steve at his worst and it wasn’t pretty. You had to pull him out of bed on a few occasions but thankfully he bounced back.

The three of you walk towards Steve’s car as Robin talks at you both about random things. The drink really taking over. By the time you get to the party your nerves have risen so much that you think you might get sick. Thankfully Robin has sobered up and she gives a reassuring nod as a little push.

“Hey Steve before we go in, I was wondering if we could talk?” You ask as you watch Robin walk away from you both.

“Oh, actually I wanted to talk to about something too! You go first though” Steve looks nervous and is playing with the hem of his shirt glancing at you.

“Okay…I don’t know if you remember because honestly, I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t. The night you turned up on my doorstep after the breakup you asked if I would be lucky to have you and we kinda talked about…dating. I just…why is this so hard. Basically, I like you a lot Steve which is funny because well I hated you for a while and I broke your nose”

Before you can ramble on anymore Steve is kissing you taking you by surprise. The kiss begins gentle Steve’s lips barely touching yours but once your surprise wears off you deepen. You are both breathless by the time you pull apart.

“Yeah that’s all I wanted to say Y/N” Steve chuckles as he wraps an arm around your shoulder pulling you into his side.

“Seriously? I know Robin told me to shoot my shot, but I didn’t think…” You trail of realising that Robin may have just set you both up.

“Yeah I think we’ve been set up Y/N” Steve laughs again while you join in. It’s been awhile since you both laughed like this and it really was nice.  

“We should probably go find her and thank her then” You smile as you grab his hand leading him into the party.

“I think I have you punching me to thank” Steve laughs as you turn towards him with a questioning look

“What?” you question Steve with a smirk on you face

“Wellll…I guess it made me see you in a whole new light. You may have punched me, but it was hot. Then when you came into the nurse’s office, I knew I was falling for you I just wouldn’t admit it to myself. Especially after I got back with...well you know the rest” Steve smiles down at you pulling you into a hug.

“Who knew you could be such a softy Harrington” you say into his chest

“Let’s go enjoy tonight!” You both walk into the party hand in hand to find Robin to thank her for her meddling.

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Tag List: If you want to be added to any of my future posts then click here to be sent to the google form!

an-antisocial-writer

charmed-asylum

takemebillyhargrove

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[tenshibeth1]

Fic Writer Meme

Thanks for the tag, @chierafied ! <3

----------------------------------------

Author Name:

Here and a few other places my author name is Tenshibeth1, which was a username I'd created back in high school some...gosh, ten years ago now? Time flies! But, it was created in part by my group of friends then. I was in the goth group, but they always said I was the nicest and most innocent of the group, like an angel. My nickname in reality is Beth, short from Elizabeth, and I've always been big into Japan, anime, and manga and all, so Tenshi seemed a fitting choice to add onto my name. Tenshi means angel. The one stands for the fact that it was my first author username. Now, Reflection of a Broken Dream (RoaBD) came later in life, when I felt everything I am and was, was broken. It came after my divorce from an abusive and terrible man...he had me believing I was nothing. I could do nothing right, I was a pest to everyone, and my dreams? Get real. I could never make them come true. Writing has always been a balm for me...and even though I believed few would read or like my stuff, I did eventually begin posting stuff again. To my shock, people liked what I wrote...they wrote me such kind words and pleas for continuation. Everyone who liked and commented on the stories gave me hope again, and confidence in myself. So thank you to everyone who read and commented! I'm where I am now because of you all. ,^.^,

Fandoms You Write For:

SessKag and SessOC from Inuyasha, KuraKag and HieiKag from Yu Yu Hakusho and Inuyasha, KuraOC from Yu Yu Hakusho (although I'm not sure if I've posted any...), and, a long while back, I used to post ShinoHina from Naruto. I also wrote some KakaHina, GaaraHina, SasuHina, and ItaHina from Naruto...I don't know if I ever posted any...but I ship it.

Where You Post:

Mainly on here and on Dokuga. I once posted on Spark a long time ago...and I was posting on FFnet, but something went awry when I tried to get the app...and now I can no longer sign in to my account and no staff members will help me, so I'll probably make another account. I also have an AO3, which I need to update. ><

Most Popular One Shot:

On Dokuga, it's a SessKag titled Now and Forever...which is a one-shot sequel to Written in the Stars. Here, it's the SessKag Someone to Protect with 79 hits. I have no oneshots on AO3. And on FFnet is Hinata's Favorite Insect, a ShinoHina, which only won by two follows. It was neck-and-neck with a SessKag Things That Go 'Thump' In The Night.

Most Popular Multichapter:

Here, it looks like the SessKag Alpha is in the lead with 104 hits. With Dokuga...holy crap, it's Cursed with over 12k reads! O.O On FFnet it's Overprotective, which is a HieiKag...and it looks like it's the favorite on AO3, too! Oh, wow. I need to go back and write on so many stories...T.T

Favorite Story:

Ahh...most of them hold a special place in my heart...but there are a few that are a little more...sentimental than others. Cursed, for example, would be one of the top ones. I began writing it when I was living with my ex-husband. It is one of the few reasons I stayed sane...and the original version of that fic was warped...just like my mind at the time. If anyone's curious, I'll tell that story later...but know that it will end well. Rising From the Ashes is going to be a good story if I can ever finish it. It's a bubbling of hope from the darkest recesses of depression...something I suffer and struggle with everyday and have to rise from. Very Merry Christmas With You is going to be a healing fic, Sesshoumaru helping Kagome heal from a trauma that happened to her as a child. They have the relationship I desire most. Same with Alpha, but it's a more recent trauma that reminds me much of my past marriage. The Unexpected, a ShinoHina, was a much earlier echo of this, with an abusive relationship in the making with her arranged betrothed in the Snow. And I just have a special place for Overprotective and All That is Meant To Be because...I do. They were works when I wasn't as confident as I am now, and I really loved and worked on the stories vigilantly outside of what I posted. I kept writing and re-writing to see which directions I wanted to go with them...I need to re-write them both with more detail and post them...

Story You Were Most Nervous to Post:

That's a tie between Arranged Marriage, a ShinoHina, and Cursed, a SessKag. Arranged Marriage was the first real fic I worked on that I posted after several years and the abuse I went through. The anxiety I suffered to post it was...unbelievable. I thought I might pass out. I expected people to boo me out of there since it isn't a very liked ship...but, happily, I found that wasn't the case. And Cursed... I was revamping it to be made public after realizing how messed up it was, and how messed up in the head I'd been... So, I was understandably nervous and trying to make it better. Real. Believable. And not the dark hole it once was...

How Do You Pick Titles:

Erm...I'm with Chiera, I pick whatever feels best. Mostly, I try to pick something short and sweet...and easy to remember.

Do You Outline:

Define outline. Haha. I do try to kind of figure out which events I want in the story and roughly figure out the ending...but I don't always do that. On the ones I have more of a feel of, I do. Ones I don't? I pretty much fly by the seat of my pants and go on the journey with my readers. Some, I still have no idea how they're going to end. We'll find out when we get there. XD

Complete Stories:

Ai yai yaiii...roughly eight. The Best Antiques will get a oneshot sequel or two, but...yeah. Not very impressive. I have a bunch of unfinished published works...and about seven hundred more on my computer... >.>;;

The list of completed fics:

FFnet

The Best Antiques

Things That Go 'Thump' In The Night

Butterfly

Waiting for You

Hinata's Favorite Insect

Dokuga

Written in the Stars

Now and Forever

Someone to Protect

In Progress:

I am currently working on The Pact, Alpha, and Cursed actively, with some work-ins on the other SessKags. I want to work on them all more, and get back into some of my KuraKag, HieiKag, and ShinoHina.

Coming Soon:

I just posted The Pact chapter 5! Dancing With Your Ghost, a SessKag one shot that likes to rip my heart out every time I write on it. I Found You, a SessKag one shot exploring alternate realities. Romancing, a SessKag series of Sesshoumaru trying to wordlessly woo Kagome. The Dark Guardian, a SessKag I hope to write for Halloween! An interesting take of Sesshoumaru as the deity of death that I started, like, a year ago and forgot about... And I'm working on a fic called The Child, an eventual KuraKag with a rough start. ...I'm also working on another KuraKag in little bits, it's currently unnamed and will revolve around Genkai's secret love child she didn't even tell Toguro about... Yes, I know I'm working on a lot at once. Because of my medicine change I have days where I struggle to focus on any one thing...so I write a little here and there. And some days I don't get to because work kills me sometimes and I have do things after work for work other days. -shrugs-

Prompts:

I love them and am open to them if anyone wants to suggest or send them. They might even help with what I'm writing. The Dark Guardian was created from a prompt. ^.^

("Unbeknownst to you, Death was watching you from the corner of the hospital room when you were being born. Fascinated by life, it imprinted on you. As the years went by, Death often saw you being bullied at school and couldn't do anything but watch; as taking the lives if your bullies would have been too much of a verdict. However, you have just been kidnapped and Death is pissed.")

Upcoming Story You are Most Excited For:

It's a tie between The Dark Guardian and Romancing! I'm excited to explore the role of Sesshoumaru as something loosely like Hades with Kagome as his Persephone...just in a very different way. (If you follow the telling of the story in which he does not rape her. The one I found, she could read the inscriptions and said it did not explicitly say he raped her, just whisked her to Hell.) But that isn't exactly the way the story is going, just that Kagome is his light in the all-consuming darkness. Romancing...is going to be sweet and funny, with a bit of drama added in. And frustration. Why does she not understand?! XD Poor Sesshy... If I could get my act together, I would work on The Youkai Games...something I've been working on, off and on, for the past ten years or so...

Five Authors:

@bearpluscat

@therebelalchemist

@dreaming-of-the-midnight-sun

And anyone else who wants to try! ^.^

[daesungindistress]

I know nothing about Seungri is officially proven ( I don’t even try to keep up anymore) but it is stupid to believe that he isn’t involved in some shady shit. There is absolutely no way he wasn’t involved with that whole Chat thing in some way or all the other shady stuff that is happening. I just can’t support someone like that but I support Big Bang, which is now only 4. I’m glad I found a blog that doesn’t support him so obsessively.

This is sort of an old ask but I’ve been meaning to post it. Guess I’ll do it now since we’re talking about this again. Sorry for the delay, and just know that I’m with you on the support for the remaining four going forward!

One note though: when you say “officially proven,” I take it you mean proven in a court of law. I hope people understand that court proceedings move according to a very specific set of rules. They do so for reasons that I don’t really want to dispute, but consider this: in JJY’s recent trial in which he denied the rape charges against him, his lawyer stated, “The KakaoTalk conversation is not valid evidence as it was obtained illegally.”

Think about that for a sec.

Who wants to bet Seungri’s lawyer plans to use the same defense to get him out of the prostitution mediation charges? This may be why he’s still denying even with all the evidence against him. We know that prostitutes were provided for his and Yoo Insuk’s foreign investors. Police have obtained a confession from Yoo himself along with the women involved and payment records that were traced back to Yoo across multiple instances (Club Arena and the “Seungtsby” Christmas party). Seungri says the sex work was ordered by Yoo without his knowledge, but the KKT chat in which he coordinates with Yoo to get it done says otherwise. So, unless police have more on him than we’ve been shown, the key to proving that the two of them conspired together appears to be in that chat… yet the court may require that the chat be thrown out as if it never existed. Not because it isn’t real, not because it didn’t happen, but because it wasn’t obtained through the proper legal avenues. A technicality.

As a side note, even though it is a lot to track of, this is why I take issue with people who say they’re waiting on a final verdict rather than keeping up with the case themselves: they risk missing out on half the story.

[timelordthirteen]

A Card for Mr. Gold 6/10

Mr. Gold/Belle, G

Summary: Mr. Gold receives a card on Christmas Eve.

Chapter Summary: After sampling the fruit cake, Gold and Belle share drinks and some history.

Notes: I will admit this chapter did not end up how I imagined it when I started. I think that's okay. For the 31 Days of Fandomas prompt #18 - Happiness.

[AO3]

“So...what’s the verdict?”

Gold set the plate down on the cushion between them, and glanced sideways at Belle. She was watching him over the rim of her brandy glass, with a soft smile.

“Hmm, better than expected,” he said, licking a crumb from his upper lip. “But I’d still prefer to eat the fruit, the cake, and the brandy separate.”

She shook her head and laughed. “Me too, but it’s one of those holiday things I think everyone has to try once or twice. Like eggnog.”

She wrinkled her nose and Gold smiled. “Don’t care for it?”

Belle shook her head again. “Can’t stand it.”

“I’ve never been much of a fan either,” he admitted. He didn't care for the thick richness or the way it smelled oddly like a graham cracker “I always preferred a good Irish coffee or hot chocolate.”

She poked his leg with her foot. “With a shot of peppermint liqueur?”

It was the second time she’d done that with her toes, touching him in a friendly, casual way. With scotch and wine and brandy in his veins he thought maybe if she did it again he’d be brave enough to do something back. “Or butterscotch?” he offered.

She made a lovely, low noise at that, and they grinned at each other over their respective drinks.

Gold felt loose and warm, comfortable for the first time in ages, even in his own home. The fire cracked pleasantly and he looked from the hearth to the tree Belle had erected in his living room. He thought that this was probably what happiness felt like, though it had been some time since he’d really felt such a thing. The visit from the carolers meant that now other people knew she was here, with him, and she didn’t seem the least bit bothered by that fact. She wanted to be here, with him, and despite how wonderful that was, he continued to wonder why.

Why him, why Belle, why this night? What was she doing here?

“Oh…”

Her quiet gasp startled him. When he looked at her, her eyes were wide and her lips were pressed together. She was fiddling with her brandy glass, twisting it by the short stem in her fingers and making the liquid swirl up the sides. He realized he must have asked his question out loud.

“I’m sorry,” he said quickly. “I don’t want you to think I don’t want you here, it’s just -” He stopped and shook his head. “I just don’t understand why you’d want to be.”

Belle shrugged and swallowed the last of her brandy. “It’s exactly what I told you. My father’s in the care home now, and I - I didn’t want to be alone, not - not on Christmas Eve.”

“And I was the only person you could think of to spend it with?”

He gave her a crooked, depreciating smile, and she looked down at her glass for a moment, her hair flopping forward to hide her face. When she looked up her eyes were overbright and her smile wobbled before she turned away.

“Hey,” he said, gently, resting a hand on her knee. “I’m just trying to understand.”

She wiped at her eyes, and he kicked himself for ruining the pleasant evening with his need for answers. He wished he could just accept that she was here for what it was, but he knew that the second she left he would only long for her to come back. He wasn’t sure how he was supposed to return to his life of solitude and eccentricity, keeping an entire town at arms length.

“Belle.”

The soft sound of her name made her turn back to him, and though her eyes were tinged with a bit of red, her smile felt warm and genuine. She laid her hand over his and gave it a squeeze.

“I’ve, um, never been alone,” she said. “Not - not like this. Not where there was no one else.”

Gold shifted to set his glass on the coffee table before he took her hand in both of his. “No one else?”

She sighed and leaned against the back of the couch, seemingly content to let him hold her hand. “Even after my mom died, there was still my dad, but now… It’s just me. I could have gone to Granny’s and hung out with her and Ruby, and Ruby’s girlfriend, and the cousins that always come to town for the holidays. But at the end of the day it’s still just...me.”

He swallowed hard. He’d known that it was just Belle and her father when they moved to Storybrooke, but he hadn’t considered what that implied. “I’m sorry, about your mother.”

She shrugged again as she picked at the hem of her red dress with her free hand. “I was fifteen, it was a long time ago.” Then she looked up and met his eyes. “What about you?”

It was Gold’s turn to shrug and find another thing to look at that wasn’t her face. “Much the same,” he said. “My parents have been dead for many years, and there’s - there’s no one else.”

“No one?” She titled to the side, dipping her head until she caught his gaze again.

Her look seeming almost knowing, and he suddenly wanted to tell her everything, the whole sad, sordid story of his existence. He wasn’t sure there was another person in the whole of the planet who knew so much about him, and if there was to be someone who did, he wanted it to be her.

He exhaled slowly before he spoke. “My son.”

Belle startled a bit, and he let her pull her hand away. “You’re what?”

Gold smiled at her surprise. “Neal. He, uh, he lives in New York.”

She shifted in her seat, inching closer. “Will you visit him after the holiday?”

He shook his head and frowned. He'd love to, but he couldn't imagine showing up on Neal's doorstep ending in anything other than regretful words. “Not likely, no. We don’t speak that often.”

“Why?”

The question was out before she could stop it, and she clapped a hand over her mouth immediately after. Gold met her eyes, and her face scrunched adorably. “Sorry, it’s none of my business.”

“It’s fine,” he said. “The answer is simple. I’m, uh, a difficult man to love.”

A light snort escaped her, and he frowned. Not knowing what to say, he finished his glass of brandy, and poured more for each of them before he sat back down, a little closer than before, close enough that her bent knee was almost touching his.

He sipped at the brandy and sighed as the warmth slid down his throat. “We had a falling out a few years ago. I was...an idiot. And now…”

He took another drink, looking into the fire as he felt her eyes on him. He knew what she must be thinking, that he was a bastard for whatever he did that would make his own son stop speaking to him. It was the same thing he thought of himself.

“So call him.” He gave her a confused look, and she just smiled and waved her hand. “Why not? It’s Christmas. If there’s ever a time to reach out to someone you care about...isn’t this it?”

Gold was thoughtful for a long moment his eyes drifting from Belle’s face back to the fire. She was right, of course. He should call Neal, but it was getting late and he didn’t want to disturb his son’s evening, which he hoped was at least as good as the one he was having with Belle.

“I didn’t have the energy to put up my Christmas tree this year,” she said, taking up the conversation again as her hand found his again across the leather sofa. “I was sitting in my apartment, everything was bare and depressing, the fridge had leftover Chinese food in it, and I thought this can’t be how I spend my Christmas.”

He squeezed her hand, and gave her a sideways smile. “And then you thought, ah yes, I should go find the most miserable bastard in town?”

She giggled, and he grinned, pleased that he could make her smile despite the mildly depressing track their conversation had taken.

“That was it exactly,” she said, lifting their joined hands and then dropping them back to the sofa for emphasis. “I thought, I wonder who could possibly be more pathetic than me.”

The slight curve of her lips and the gleam in her eye let him know she was joking, and he shook his head. “Well, you certainly came to the right place.”

Belle let her head fall back on the couch as she laughed, and he reached for his brandy.

“You’re wrong you know,” she said as her merriment died down and her face turned more serious. “About being difficult, I mean. You’re - you’re not.”

Gold stopped with the snifter at his lips, frozen as the meaning of her words hit him. He took a quick sip, the heat of the drink the only thing that kept him from well up with tears.

“Thank you,” he said softly. Then took another, larger sip of the brandy and set it aside.

“Admit it,” Belle said, nudging him for a third time with her delicately painted toes. “You’re happy I’m here.”

He turned to look at her, catching the small smirk that played over her mouth. She was right again. He was happy, could be almost deliriously so, he suspected. If he’d let himself.

Sighing, he leaned back, aware that they were still holding hands, and smiled. “I’m not unhappy.”

[southeastasianists]

Against a backdrop of widening religious fault lines and concerns over freedom of speech, a group of fearless Indonesian comics is using the power of laughter to tackle society’s ills

Cheers, whoops and enthusiastic applause accompany Iqbal Muzakki as he shuffles off stage. The night’s MC bounds onto the platform in his place, keeping the energy of the show high: “How about Muzakki, everyone? He killed it, right?” There’s a strong “yes” from the audience. “And you know what?” the MC continues, “This is the only place where a Muslim can kill successfully… and nobody actually dies.”

This is Keminggris, a live, English-language, stand-up comedy show in Malang, the second-largest city in Indonesia’s East Java province. In a modern, open-air bar, the show’s eight performers deliver two hours of very funny, but often brutal, material that holds nothing sacred. From Chinese parents to Indian farmers; Indonesian politicians to Zumba-loving pensioners, nobody is safe from ridicule.

But in the world’s most-populous Muslim country, it is the religious jokes that stand out from the rest. Indonesia’s reputation as a moderate, secular democracy has taken a bit of a battering in recent times. Religious intolerance is on the rise, and many in the country feel free speech is under threat. For the past two years, the national debate has become increasingly dominated by the right-wing Islamist group, the Islamic Defenders Front (FPI). FPI members have been accused of violent attacks on religious minorities, intimidation of journalists and targeted online abuse.

There have been many calls for the group to be banned as the country’s religious fault lines widen, but a number of young Indonesians are attempting to fight back and help heal the damage through comedy. Muzakki, a student at the Islamic University in Malang, filled his set with jokes about a failed attempt to turn him into a suicide bomber at school and his mistaken belief that he could buy halal beer. He says he wants to “fix” how Islam is increasingly portrayed in the country.

“[The idea] that Islam is a strict authority – it’s not like that, you can have a sense of humour like me,” he says. “I just want to show that to other people, especially non- Muslims. Islam is not dangerous.”

The use of comedy to help effect social or political change is not a new idea, but it’s still at a fledgling stage in Indonesia. In fact, stand-up comedy itself has a relatively short history in the country. Indonesian humour had long tended to favour comedy troupes performing sketches and physical comedy skits; it wasn’t until the mid-2000s that a few pioneering stand-ups began to make some headway, first in Jakarta and then at national level.

The scene exploded in 2011, when two television channels ran stand-up comedy talent shows that garnered a big national audience. One of those shows, Stand Up Comedy Indonesia, on Kompas TV, is still running and still popular. Most of Indonesian comedy’s biggest names have won or appeared on the show.

Despite its popularity, many comedians have found television a difficult medium for pursuing edgier social and political comedy. “In TV shows, the censorship is quite severe,” says Reggy Hasibuan, the organiser and MC of Keminggris. “No political jokes, no ethnicity jokes and especially no religious jokes. I think personally that has reduced the quality of [Indonesian] comedy because only safe material goes through.”

Is it going to be dangerous? Is it offensive? I think before I go to the stage. But why should I feel afraid of it? My religion is funny

Under an umbrella organisation known as Stand Up Indo, there are now more than 30 stand-up comedy ‘communities’ across Indonesia. Many comics are students or part-time performers, but while the audiences are generally good, the money generally isn’t. Despite the financial restraints, it is live shows where comedians can hone their craft and, more importantly, really get their teeth into risky material.

In Malang, Fajar Ardiansyah says he doesn’t set out to deliberately offend anyone, but he believes the best way to deal with social problems is through comedy. “I never touch any kind of personal belief,” he says. “I make sure that everything I deliver is being considered by my comic friends. Is it going to be dangerous? Is it offensive? I think before I go to the stage. I consider everything. But why should I feel afraid of it? My religion is funny.”

“We need to be honest,” says Hasibuan. “If you’re living in this country and you don’t have any problems with religion, then you’re a liar, because it’s everywhere. We’re just wrapping that up in a funny way, so it’s easier to accept. Religion is not absolute; you can make fun of it and it’s OK. We have always had a problem with extremism; it’s always there. But I think what’s hopeful is that now we see people fighting back. They’ve had enough; they’ve arrived at that boiling point at which they think something must be done.”

The comics admit they still have a long way to go before their dissent drowns out the voices of Indonesia’s emboldened hardline Islamic groups. They also think that what they are doing carries a risk far greater than just causing offence. The current climate in Indonesia does not easily allow for anybody to speak out about tense religious issues, particularly non-Muslims.

A survey earlier this year by the Wahid Foundation found that nearly 40% of respondents from across Indonesia were “intolerant” towards non-Muslims. In May, this intolerance reached fever pitch when, after weeks of FPI mass rallies demanding his arrest, the ethnic Chinese and Christian governor of Jakarta was found guilty of violating Indonesia’s strict blasphemy law. Basuki Tjahaja Purnama, better known as ‘Ahok’, was sentenced to two years in prison after he referred to a Qur’anic verse in one of his speeches. His conviction followed a bitter gubernatorial election campaign in which religious identity was a major issue. Human Rights Watch called the verdict a “frightening future” for moderates and non-Muslims.

Hasibuan is himself half-Chinese and from a Christian family, though he now considers himself an atheist. He has been subjected to abuse and violent threats online after he posted a promotional flyer for a show he called Halal Christmas. Nothing happened, but he was concerned enough to put security on the door of the show, something he hadn’t done before. He is also well aware of the potential legal risks.

“Its an absolute no-no in this country to speak, make fun of, or ridicule people from different religions,” he says. “If a Christian makes a joke about Muslims, that will go bad very fast.”

Doing the shows in English helps protect him and the other performers, “because bigots are generally stupid and don’t understand English, right?” he says with a laugh.

But he also closes the show by imploring the audience not to post any videos online – “or we’ll all end up in jail!”

It’s difficult for performers to balance risk versus reward. Posting material online exposes them, but it’s also one of the few ways to gain national and international attention outside the constraints of television.

One of the most high-profile comedians in Indonesia is Sakdiyah Ma’ruf. She is one of the few comics who have gained international recognition and also one of a limited number of women on the standup comedy circuit.

Ma’ruf grew up in a very conservative Muslim family of Arab descent in northern Java. She says she was expected to grow up as a “decent Muslim girl” and eventually be married off to an older man. Much of her comedy focuses on her upbringing and the treatment of women in conservative Muslim families. Some of her most provocative material is easy to find online. During a TED Talk in Bali last year she told her audience: “In my community, people work fucking hard to pretend they still live in the desert.”

In 2015, Ma’ruf was awarded the Vaclav Havel Prize for Creative Dissent in Oslo – previous winners include Ai Weiwei and Aung San Suu Kyi – but her profile has also attracted vitriol from inside Indonesia.

“I cannot have that in the back of my mind if I want to continue working,” she says. “I know that there’s a danger. I don’t want to go to jail or receive death threats. I cannot allow myself to get scared of that. It’s hard enough to write jokes that work; it’s going to be even harder if I have to self-censor.”

Though Ma’ruf describes herself purely as a comedian, she, like the others, feels a greater purpose in what she is trying to do. “Comedy has the potential to combat extremism because it creates a safe space for everyone to discuss their issues. But, for me personally, the most important thing is to be able to talk honestly about how human we are, that we are all flawed.”

Recalling her last television appearance a few years ago, Ma’ruf says she was repeatedly reminded that the programme was live. The warning being: don’t say anything controversial.

“What am I going to say?” she laughs. “What are they so worried about? I’m just a girl in a hijab. It’s not that dangerous.”

[goldbridesmaiddresses789]

I really love our dogs as though they were our children!@~%&( jcpenny prom dresses

Diana: After the solemnisation, we had a short photoshoot with our bridesmaids and groomsmen at the hotel before changing into our second outfits. At 7.15pm, we made our way back to the reception hall. We entered the wedding hall with the kompang, which is a traditional welcome procession fishtail wedding dresses. They performed a couple of songs along with some silat performances. After that, we had a photo-taking session with the guests. We changed into our third outfit in five minutes, as the venue had an office which they allowed us to use as a changing room. We walked in to the reception hall to the song 'Kaulah Segalanya' performed by our wedding singer. Our flower girls led the way as they threw faux rose petals along the aisle. We continued with a wedding speech followed by the cake-cutting session. More photography sessions followed before we ended the night by thanking our guests. Pearlyn: Honestly? I was very tired. I had many long nights prior to that, trying to get my work done, finishing up my family's outfits for my wedding, and of course, going through the nitty gritty part of the preparation! But the tiring part was only the initial part in the morning. Once my hair and make up started (which was at 12pm), the excitement of the day itself coupled with adrenaline rush just filled me up. I only remembered feeling really happy, excited, touched, and beautiful most of the time! We did away with the traditional gate crashing at home and had our families checked into the hotel. It made things a lot easier as our families were able to rest and not worry about having to rush around on the day itself.

Raymond: Our video shoot was first done at our home then around the parklands of Adelaide city and also at Hahndorf which is an old German town village with sandstone buildings and vintage looking shops. We enjoyed shooting at home to capture the moments with our dogs which I thought was really special christmas dresses cocktail. Both Angela and I really love our dogs as though they were our children jcpenny prom dresses. The parklands were chosen with a similar theme to our photo shoot, with natural greenery as backgrounds. Hahndorf was a great choice as it had a real medieval theme and unique monuments which added complexity to the video. We also managed to shoot during sunset which I thought allowed certain moments to look even more special wedding gown silhouettes. But the more refined classic styles of the 1980s are also in evidence with sleek and stylish whites in evidence everywhere sequin dress for prom. In particular, Rita Ora's recent appearance on the One Show highlighted a dignified way of power-dressing. The clean white dress carried an air of style far removed from the sights usually witnessed on the X-Factor, where Ora is currently jsweddenladress20107 one of the judges delivering verdicts on another year's round of singing hopefuls. The TV programme is renowned for showcasing the best and worst in fashion, and with the latest odds at Flashbitch showing that the betting is wide open for the chances of the judge's success, it looks like being compulsive viewing for the remainder of 2015.

You've probably noticed that since the first 'yes' you've said to the whole bridesmaid shenanigan, there isn't much room for you to say 'no' to anything afterwards. Even (and especially) when it comes to your bridesmaid dress. Of course, your opinions and suggestions of a more flattering colour and silhouette that'll suit everyone will be taken into consideration. But if she decides to go ahead with her choice, you still have to say 'yes' to it. Remember, you'll only be in the dress for 24 hours tops and what you do with it after is entirely up to you ?C there is no need to ruin your friendship with the bride-to-be. You May Also Like: Squad with a efflorescence diadem and you've got royal party ... &%^&*(&*(The cut of your observance peal can straighten a huge ... $@^35a stunning selection of languid gowns that your ... Stunning long sleeve evening dresses & affordable evening ... you will need to make a decision the level of tunes and also a ...

[brokenmusicboxwolfe]

I saw:

Wonder Woman- I admit I was almost nervous about seeing this film.

 Wonder Woman was a key figure in my childhood. I had the Ms Magazine book reprinting golden age Wonder Woman comics, held together with packing tape from my carrying it everywhere, that I read and reread. My best friend and I got in the sort of heated debates only five or six get in over what Wonder Woman’s starting pose for “bullets and bracelets” should be. My best friend going with the then running tv show’s crossed wrists seemed silly when you gotta be ready to move, and it wasn’t like that in the original story. We played at being Wonder Woman and made up stories usung our dolls. The only Halloween costume I still have is the Wonder Woman one from back then, an object I take great care of. ** Heck, I still have my dolls, pencil sharpener, puzzle book and the rest of the Amazon Princess gear I gobbled up...

My Mom, whose father never approved of comics, had secretly read them as a little girl back in the 1940s, so approved whole heartedly. In fact Wonder Woman related objects have been a sort of running theke for gifts between us (me giving her a Wonder Woman plush bunny at Easter and her giving me a mug at Christmas being the most recent). 

So if both my mother and I have waited most if our lives and through scores of Batman and Superman movies for a Wonder Woman feature film, why the anxiety?

Well, because despite my love of the concept of Wonder Woman, I have really disliked some of the takes on the character over the years. As a little girl adoring the ‘40s comics and the ‘70s tv show (though the Superfriends take was fine for something so “childish”...I was a mature little tyke! LOL), , I’d tried the comics at the newstand and went “This is stupid!”. I ended up for some years buying it just for the Huntress back up stories. At my first comic store trip at 14 I tried some very cheap battered old copies from like around 1960 and....Ick! NO! But then along came the George Perez run, and here was MY Wonder Woman. I loved the comic during his years, but unfortuantely it wasn’t forever. The new creators had a vision of the character, both in personality and increasingly over appearance, that was dramatically different than me. Over the years tales of her have been a roller coaster...here feminist, there sexist, here a figure of peace, there a snarling war monger. 

So here is the thing, I admit my image of Wonder Woman has been rather specific. I saw her as someone that can kick your ass, but would rather not if she doesn’t have to. Her first interest is peace, despite being prepared before. If talk fails, she will use force out of a need to protect, but that force will be the minimal necessary for the job. As in she would prefer to restrain you than beat you to a bloody pulp. My Wonder Woman would kill as a last resort, shows compassion and kindness and has a sense of humor. She smiles as often as she glowers. I realize this is a reflection of my basic moral code. Did Wonder Woman shape my world view, or did I take to depictions of Wonder Woman that reflected what I believed? 

Which ever, my anxiety came from all those other Wonder Woman versions. The ones that were grim and brutal concerned me more than the old fashioned sexist ones simply because in the modern age the idea of “strength” seems to involve the ability to kill. The recent DC films hadn’t filled me with much hope. Bystanders should matter to a hero (Looking at you “Man of Steel” city smasher, when you could have taken your fight with Zod to a cornfield or the moon or...). A “gritty” Wonder Woman wasn’t something I wanted. 

Luckily it looks like I wasn’t the only one. Not that there isn’t plenty of violence  and our heroine does rack up a body count.

It begins by telling us of Wonder Woman AKA Princess Diana’s childhood, with the only little girl on the island if Amazon’s running off wanting to learn to fight. And OMG! Isn’t the woman chasing after her trying to catch the little scamp Dayna from Blake’s 7?????? Wow! Yep it really was Josette Simon!*** We get to see the child’s over protective mother reluctantly allow her demigod of a daughter get trained. We also see Diana embrace whole completely the legends and ideals of her people. These things always turn out to be a lot more complicated when you grow up...

And grow up she does. A WWI pilot crashes lands at the island, followed by pursued by Germans, leading to bloodshed and a corpse strewn beach in paradise. Finding out about the World War in progress, Diana wants to take the pilot (Steve Trevor, of course) back into the world, partly because he’s gotten a hold of info about a new a deadlier than ever before gas cooked up by a German scientist, a woman with an interesting bit of mask work covering her experimentation damage. Her main reason is the belief that such a war could only be the result of Ares, god of war, and that as an Amazon she is duty bound to stop him. Naturally, her first step in growing up us to defy he parent and go off to do what she believes is right.

Once out in our world Diana is a fish out of water, coping with a world where women don’t even yet have the right to vote and fashions are most definiately not conducive to battle. She is also incredibly innocent, with a sort of adolecent passionate belief in the world as a simply place. Just go to the battle front, kill Ares, and the world will be at peace. And so, through the story, she comes to learn the world is more complicated, but comes through quickly from the dark disillusionment that brings to find again the hope deep within, only now with a more mature understanding behind it.

Or, you know, lots of fighting and CGI work as Wonder Woman leaps over tall buildings in a single bound...oh wait, that’s the guy in blue tights...But she does leap, off the charts strong. There is a detour for brief romance, much to my mother’s annoyance. (My mother grimiced and muttered as the kissing started.) ****And there is the pyrotechnic superbeing versus superbeing ending, plus the emotional blow of a tragic sacrifice.  That sort if thing.

I liked the choice of WWI, not simply because WWII has been done by superhero films already and we are in the anniversary period for that war, but because it was a particularly messy, large and ugly war. It works thematically, both for Diana to assume Ares is behind all of it and to realize humans really are capable of such horrors, without the more simple good guy/ bad guy  dichotomy of WWII. 

On the other hand, I was a bit uncomfortable with how once Steve showed up he became more of the driving force in the story. In a way it makes sense. He has the experience in our world and knows how it works. He would seem the adult to her not yet fully mature personality in this sort of coming of age story. Yet, a few times I was a bit bothered and had a fleeting “SHE is supposed to be the hero of this story!” moments.

Over all I really enjoyed it. It can’t live up to the hype, but that’s okay because nothing ever does. My mother, who is notoriously hard to please when she has an idea of a character, gave this Wonder Woman her endorsement, saying that this one got the kindness as well a strength. But really, I don’t know if I can give a proper verdict when I have so much emotions tied up with the very existance of the film. Watching the first few minutes of the film I noticed I had tears on my cheeks. After 76 years there was FINALLY a Wonder Woman movie, so for now my feeling is just ....“YES!!!!”

**There are no photos of my wearing it. On fact there are no photos of me wearing ANY Halloween costume! What’s up with that? I dunno, but it just sort of happened. Talking about the costume with Mom she said there should be photos and was shocked when I pointed out the only Halloween pics I have are with jack o’lanterns, and many of them. My folks just didn’t even realize they weren’t thinking to take pictures of us growing up......

***I have a story about my best friend in high school reacting to a pic of her...but that’s for another time...

**** Since this week was my parents’ anniversary and Pop was called “Steve” I think it was reminding her of her grief too. 

[oneplanetmikey]

Obsessive Depeche Mode fan gives new Depeche Mode album five stars.

For a Depeche Mode fan, the release of a new Depeche Mode album is a significant event.  With an album every four years, it is more exciting than Christmas and a very happy black celebration. Now in their 37th year, my boys from Basildon in Essex have moved through life as synth poppers, to purveyors of industrial pop, indulged in a gothic majesty, became electro-rock stadium monsters and engaged in a brittle and strident electronic blues. Yet for all of this, they remain a quintessentially English, almost Victorian band. Depeche Mode has long been concerned with how redemption and salvation follow sin and suffering. You either get it, or you don’t. Their monolithic synths ain’t for everyone. And that’s OK, they just want to be respected.

So, how does Spirit find Depeche Mode? In good form, actually; really, really good form. What is striking about this album is while it dips its lid to Depeche Mode’s past, this is an album that is focussed on the present. Whilst this isn’t Depeche Mode’s first foray into politics, it is their most overt commentary on the state of the world. If Everything Counts, People Are People and New Dress were soft poppy slaps to the head, Spirit is very clear about where it stands, it packs a bloody great big punch to the head.  Album opener, Going Backwards, carpet bombs its truth. And in the very best Depeche Mode tradition, by the time Dave sings about death by drone “because there's nothing inside, we feel nothing inside” you just want to dance, or maybe revolt.

Lead single Where’s the Revolution asks where the revolution is and Dave suggests we are letting the band down.  This is a terrible state of affairs, no fan wants to let the band down, we love those boys. In The Worst Crime, we are invited to a lynching, it is about the creeping fascist state we have found ourselves in. Dave ticks of ill-informed readers and wonders why he has found himself in this strange place we have all found ourselves.

The album’s grandest moment occurs in Cover Me. Lyrically a Bowiesque torch song it until it wafts off into a splendid, pulsating Kraftwerk meets Ennio Morricone moment of genuine hands in the air euphoria.  It truly is splendid.

Martin delivers two songs on Spirit, Eternal, a hymn for the devoted and unusually for Depeche Mode, the album closer Fail: in which he delivers his verdict on the world and tells us we’re fucked.  Fail is his best song since 1997’s Home.

It wouldn’t be a Depeche Mode album without a song to get down and dirty to and So Much Love delivers in spades. Dave tells us “there is a fire in my  veins, a desire that causes pain,” and you just can’t but help to want to shag the poor fella.  There is just so much love in Dave. And me. 

It also wouldn’t be a Depeche Mode album without a song about the souring of love, in No More (This is the Last Time) Dave tells you to go your way and he’ll go his way. It is ok though, Martin harmonises about “all my memories, all my pain” and it is pretty enough to make you feel ok it. One even may be inclined to dance.

Sonically Spirit gives a nod to Speak and Spell, Some Great Reward and Black Celebration. Producer James Ford has kept the band fresh, sharpening their sound and delivering a sparse album that sounds quite lush.

The greatest achievement of Depeche Mode is giving machine music a human heart and Spirit for all its anger and rage, is warm and hopeful. There are moments of exquisite beauty amongst this most direct and imperious sounding album. At the risk of sounding like an obsessive fanboy giving his favourite band five stars, I give this album five stars. It truly is a splendid, a late career classic Depeche Mode album and hands down, the band’s best in 20 years.

[gethealthy18-blog]

Style Verdict Aishwarya Rai Bachchan’s Looks Are A Big ‘No Can(ne) Do’ This Year

New Post has been published on https://healingawerness.com/getting-healthy/getting-healthy-women/style-verdict-aishwarya-rai-bachchans-looks-are-a-big-no-canne-do-this-year/

Style Verdict Aishwarya Rai Bachchan’s Looks Are A Big ‘No Can(ne) Do’ This Year

Chaitra Krishnan May 22, 2019

Aishwarya Rai Bachchan is one of those Indian actresses who have marked their style spot at the Cannes. We may not have seen her in a lot of movies off late, but Cannes (the French film festival) and the fashion police all over the world await her red carpet pictures. And this year, she definitely did put on a not-so-amazing show at the prestigious film festival which is considered to be a fashion arena by many. Ash has always given us memorable looks at the Cannes — remember the purple lipstick and the Cinderella gown? She has been so good at this in the previous editions that we’re a little disappointed with her looks this year.

While the media and her fans have been waiting for that one jaw-dropping look, the odds of that happening is probably as low as HBO remaking the last season of Game of Thrones. It’s quite heart-breaking that none of her outfits did justice to the charisma of the blue-eyed beauty. Don’t agree with us? Here’s a recap of all her looks at the Cannes this year.

The Gift-wrapper Look

iammanisha / Instagram

iammanisha / Instagram

Aishwarya wore a gold-toned holographic six-layered ensemble by Jean-Louis Sabaji Couture that made her look a lot like a birthday gift. The fish-scaled texture of this one-shouldered dress didn’t look like the ideal ingredient of a masterpiece. Even though her makeup was on point, the golden paint on her earlobes looked tacky. The concept gown and the sleeky straight hair weren’t one of the best combos. The six-layered train, the sharply lined neck, and everything else that was gold and sharp weren’t quite delightful. As expected, the audience wasn’t as thrilled as they were when they saw Deepee or PeeCee who were dressed like wonders.

The Safe White Gown

iammanisha / Instagram

iammanisha / Instagram

Yes, this one isn’t that bad after all. Ash’s stylist tried to play it safe this time and the pretty white gown looks good on her. We surely miss her bold red lips with this look since she went for a nude shade. Her excellently done smokey eyes were the best part of this look. However, we’re still not that happy because we really craved for something better from one of the most desirable women of the world. The look was good but it was as bland as tofu and there were no statement-making elements even in half a mile radius. Mediocre and safe is what we’d like to label it down as.

The Death of Denim

iammanisha / Instagram

Denim is something that can make you look hot and cool at the same time — it‘s the most multipurpose and versatile garment ever! But this look of Aishwarya proves that a bad stylist can make even the best of the fabrics look terrible. A high-waisted flared jeans and a classy white t-shirt? (another safe look) Well, safe until it was pushed down the edge with the floor-length denim jacket. The matching silver embellishments do stand out but that’s probably because of the loudness of the blue! We ask why-oh-why?

The Christmas Candy

the_fab_fashion_close / Instagram

Aishwarya nailed the red and white candy look and we’ve got to give it to her for doing that. There isn’t much to work with when all you’ve got is a boring look that has been turned and tried a trillion times! Thank goodness she pulled it off without letting the boredom seep out. It’s hard to believe that a group of talented designers failed to give the former Miss World a red carpet look that would strike the hearts of every fashion-lover.

Denim Again? Seriously?

iammanisha / Instagram

iammanisha / Instagram

Looks like Ash’s stylists can’t get over their love for denim. After all the denim fiasco that happened with the previous look, the bold team went for something quite similar again. Just replace the white t-shirt with a black one and the floor-length denim jacket with a red vinyl one. The shiny Gucci belt and the bold red lips are back when 80% of the look is already going south. The red heels and her pretty well-done makeup are satisfying if you want to look at the brighter side for half a second.

The Final Verdict: We wish some of the elements of these looks were thrown into the Bermuda Triangle (so that it can never be found again) and the designers styled our queen afresh. The good elements are scattered here and there like a badly jumbled puzzle and we’re not happy about it. Aishwarya is at the 72nd edition of the Cannes Films Festival where she is representing Loreal. Let’s just hope that she comes up with something better before the wrap-up. We’re seriously crossing our fingers and waiting!

Did you like Mrs. Bachchan’s Cannes looks? Or are you disappointed just the way we are? Share your thoughts with us in the comments section below.

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Source: https://www.stylecraze.com/trending/aishwarya-rai-bachchans-cannes-looks/

[bforbookslut]

ARC Review: Kiss Me in New York by Catherine Rider

This book was provided to me by the publisher via NetGalley & Edelweiss in exchange for an honest review. This review edition is an ARC and may differ from the final edition.

I have given Kiss Me in New York by Catherine Rider a ☆☆ rating. It belongs to the Young Adult Contemporary Romance genre. Kids Can Press publishes it. It is published October 3, 2017.

The blurb reads:

It's Christmas Eve at JFK in NYC.

Charlotte is a British student, waiting for a flight home after the worst semester of her life. Anthony is a native New Yorker, surprising his girlfriend at the airport after three months apart. Charlotte has just been dumped, and Anthony is about to be dumped, right in the middle of the holiday crowd.

Charlotte's flight is canceled when a blizzard blows in, and Anthony can't bear to go home. So, they set out into the city together, clutching a book Charlotte picks up in the airport gift shop: Ten Easy Steps for Getting Over Your Ex. For this one night, they'll focus on healing their broken hearts ... together.

Step-by-step, the two struggle to put the past behind them. But the snow is so enchanting, and the holiday lights are so beguiling, that soon their shared misery gives way to something else. Soon, they're not only over their exes --- they're falling for each other.

Then a subway ride splits them up by mistake. Will they reunite before Charlotte's flight leaves New York forever?

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It’s been a really tough work week for me, especially since I work full time. And it takes a toll on my blogging and how much time I spend on here. Although, I do read excessively since my commute to work takes me an hour and fifteen minutes! I’m currently catching up with as many of my reviews as I can and I’m hoping to clear my ledger by the end of the month. As always, my reviews may contain spoilers. I say may because what’s a spoiler to you may not be a spoiler for me.

Verdict:

A quick note before we start: this was previously published in 2016 so if you see it floating around, that's the old one. I'm not too sure what the differences are though. /:

October might be a little early for Christmas romances but Kiss Me in New York strives to inject a little cheer into this autumn season and remind you of what’s to come once the cold hits. Kiss Me in New York is definitely a super cutesy and warm-hearted story a la Hallmark and Lifetime movies but it is rife with clichés at every turn.

Kiss Me in New York starts off very promising with both Charlotte and Anthony getting dumped at the airport. Their heartbreak is universal and very well-written. It’s so relatable because:

You’ve probably been dumped because you were only a temporary fling even though you thought you weren’t (Charlotte)

You’ve probably tried to surprise your other half after they’ve been away for while only to find out they’ve been cheating on you (Anthony)

I’ve probably watched too many movies

But I’ll admit, I actually teared up. I felt Charlotte’s pain acutely, like a serious stab to the heart.

Plus, Charlotte seems like the right kinda girl: headstrong, ambitious and just a tad bit optimistic. She isn’t pretentious and although she was a little bit too certain she would be able to reinvent herself in a different country while on a student exchange programme, she was able to pick herself up and carry on. She didn’t pity herself (too much!) and decided to do something about which I find was very grown up about her.

The premise is the stuff of cheesy, romantic and fluffy fanfiction as well! Two strangers meet on Christmas Eve after having the heartbreak of their lives and decide to spend the holiday together doing things to make themselves feel better. Of course you’d expect some falling in love, some confession of love atop the Empire State Building a la Gossip Girl’s Chuck and Blair and loads of Christmas magic.

But then, it descends into all kinds of YA hell!

YA Hell 1: Virgin-Madonna complex.

Let’s start with the most glaring and the one that bothered me the most: Kiss Me in New York is the Anthony show. That’s right, it’s not the Charlotte and Anthony show but rather, it documents all of Anthony’s whining and moping and bitching about his ex-girlfriend, Maya. All the while, Charlotte’s story fades into the background.

Although Kiss Me in New York was told from both Charlotte and Anthony’s perspective, his voice becomes stronger and stronger as the story unfolds. Instead of the story unfolding into two characters falling in love with each other as they learn about one another and spend close to 24 hours together, it’s Anthony constantly comparing Charlotte to Maya. He doesn’t enjoy Charlotte’s company; half the time, he finds her very frustrating and annoying. He falls in love with her not because he likes her for who she is but because she’s not like Maya!

Anthony basically pits Charlotte’s “girl-next-door” qualities against Maya’s “sexy-vixen” sorta thing. The whole virgin-Madonna binary is so last century, guys!

Is Maya a bad person? Yes, because she didn’t care for his feelings and she cheated!

Are her bad traits a result of female stereotypes perpetuated by the media? I think so.

But Anthony was pretty loopy as well. He wanted to fucking tattoo her name on his arm. Like boy, you’re barely out of high school. Chill. Is Anthony a bad boyfriend? I don’t know. He probably is because why would she cheat on him? If he’s constantly whining, I’d probably dump him too for someone a lot more mature and sophisticated.

YA Hell 1.1: They don’t act like teenagers. Or say teenager-y things.  

While both of them are teenagers (with Anthony barely straddling teenagehood), Charlotte and Anthony act and behave like adults (This ARC review is overdue so I hope things were fixed in the final piece). They attend a bar and do some underage drinking, the run rampant around New York City in the freezing cold and even attend some strange singles party where they are forced to kiss under mistletoe before they can leave the party. I find that these are tropes that occur only in romance or new adult novels. Not one that’s aimed at a younger demographic.

YA Hell 2: Insta-fucking-love.

To cut a long story short, it’s been 24 hours! And they’re in love. Charlotte girl, you’ll be dumping his ass in two weeks because he’s such a little bitch.

YA Hell 3: Writing is not too great.

Coming from two young adult writers and working partners, Stephanie Elliot and James Noble, the writing can read very amateur. It often makes the mistake of telling and not showing. And that’s the trap when you’re writing a first-person POV. You have to be very careful to not narrate the scenes but rather show me what’s going on.

YA Hell 4: She chooses the boy!!!!!!!!!!

Charlotte didn’t choose Columbia. She chose him. She didn’t want to leave him. Not Columbia. Columbia’s just a vehicle

Conclusion:

Kiss Me in New York by Catherine Rider was a painful, painful read. I only gave it two stars because a) everything deserves at least one star, b) I love Charlotte. She’s a beacon of light and hope next to Whiny Tony. Oh, that rhymes! It could have done way better. Could have been a fucking cute Lifetime holiday movie. Instead, it reads like a tired, been-there-done-that story. Not to mention, that font on the cover isn’t doing anything for me. I have that font somewhere in my database and it’s not one that I pull out often.

[itsiotrecords-blog]

http://ift.tt/2rIm4Vy

World famous, semi-retired Formula One commentator Murray Walker once said about the sport, “Anything happens in Grand Prix racing, and it usually does.” But you’d be forgiven for thinking he was talking about taking a bend at 180mph and hoping for the best. The bare truth is the sport has always had a mildly debauched and on-the-fly image reportedly managed by conniving accountants and mechanics paying lip service to overpaid and oversexed racing drivers. What’s more, the impression we have of the sport hasn’t really changed since the open wheel Fiats and Bugattis of 1907. The antics of “playboys” like James Hunt, Juan Fangio and Jensen Button only seal the deal for the sport’s hedonistic image. But is that really fair? Well, to be honest, yes; the sport is a cut-throat multi-million dollar business with lots of national prestige involved, plus lots of rich people, and lots of living it up. It isn’t exactly Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. On and off the track the teams themselves play a dangerous game against each other to gain a psychological or technological advantage over their rivals; whether on race day or in the run-up, or by engineering accidents and throwing races. It’s just most of us don’t hear about it when we sit down to a 190-mile blitz of some high-performance engines. So let’s change the status quo; without further ado here are the 15 dirty secrets the F1 execs hoped you’d forgotten about.

#1 State-sponsored racism Sad but true, racism is an ongoing problem for any sport and despite stronger sentences in the UK for the handful of spectators who prove to be bigoted good-for-nothings some European countries are a little more lenient. The world of F1 is no exception. Most famously at the Spanish circuit in 2008 some F1 fans showed us how dumb some people can really be. A group of them stood up with blacked-up faces and taunted and abused Lewis Hamilton every time he pitted. As if it couldn’t be any worse they had “Hamilton’s Family” written on their t-shirts. The apparent germ of this filthy onslaught comes from the long-standing rivalry between Hamilton and Spanish driver Fernando Alonso and an out-and-out simple-minded hatred of the first ever black F1 champion. The track abuse was only the tip of the iceberg as the shameful hate was picked up with glee by the Spanish press. Was anything done about it though? Seemingly not.

#2 Flavio Briatore – Fraud Before disgraced business magnate Flavio Briatore was offered a place as commercial director for Benetton in 1988 it was well-known to insiders that he had been convicted in Italy on several fraud charges in the earlier years of the decade. He was in fact convicted of multiple counts of fraud in the 1980s and received two prison sentences then, in 1986 was sentenced to three years for fraud and conspiracy for his role in an elaborate system of rigged gambling games using fake playing cards. The presiding judges described these as confidence tricks and outlined a secret scheme by which unsuspecting punters were “ensnared” by fixed games and fictional characters. Briatore and his fellow conspirators made a great deal of money from these scams. Briatore’s ways weren’t wholly dedicated to scamming unsuspecting card players though. His dangerous antics as Renault’s team principal played out in the 2008 race fixing scandal between Fernando Alonso and Nelson Piquet Jr, the inception of which Briatore played a pivotal part. Let’s face it, a leopard rarely changes his spots especially when there’s money involved. Following stringent denials, Briatore eventually resigned shortly after the scandal quoting his reason for leaving as, “Just trying to save the team”, “It’s my duty. That’s the reason I’ve finished.” We’ll hear more from him later.

#3 McLaren vs Ferrari – Espionage Let’s turn our attention to the curious case of Trudy Coughlan, wife of Michael Coughlan, chief designer of McLaren’s Formula One racing team. In 2007 she appeared in a copy shop in deepest darkest Surrey with a raft of around 780 secret bits of paperwork (including technical information concerning F1 cars, plans and finances) from none other than Ferrari. Let’s be honest, no one would have known any different if the guy behind the desk wasn’t such a big fan of the sport and an avid supporter of the prancing horse. Naturally, one call to company’s Formula One sporting director Stefano Domenicali sealed the deal on a high-level investigation of a leak from inside the Ferrari camp and a serious accusation of industrial espionage, if not more than a little amateur. The end result was an indictment of McLaren, plentiful penalties left, right and centre and a record $100 million fine. It can’t have been a warm and cosy Christmas in the Coughlan household after that, but let’s face it every action has a consequence. After it had all blown over it was downhill fast for the team and presumably the guy who leaked the documents to the Coughlans.

#4 The Mugging In November 2010 F1 Supremo Ecclestone was mugged in front of his Brazilian girlfriend Fabiana Flosi. He was wrestled to the ground in front of his Knightsbridge penthouse and left with a black eye and £200,000 less in jewellery. One of several victims of the “Millionaire Muggers,” Ecclestone chose not to go down the route of victim support like the rest of us but seized the chance to make a little back on the escapade. He had his injured face photographed for an advert with Swiss luxury watchmaker Hublot. By the oddest quirk of destiny, Hublot had at the start of the year agreed a deal with Formula One Management (FOM), the sport’s commercial rights holder to partner with F1. The company deny Ecclestone was paid for the advert, but it must have provided him with some fantastic rates of pay for advertising.

#5 Doping Allegations Now, we’ve all heard of drug-use in the fields of cycling, athletics and golf to name a few, but F1 has never really been afflicted by doping scandals. That’s not to say that there hasn’t been the odd space cowboy. According to Marc Sanson, former head of the French anti-doping council, F1 drivers have been known to take performance enhancing drugs before races. “For many years,” he is quoted as saying, “drivers have used tacrine, a product used in the treatment of diseases such as Alzheimer’s, in order to remember the circuits more easily.” But when it comes to drug abuse rife in the current sport, Sanson is less sure. What’s more, his comments back in 2013 were vehemently rebuked by former F1 doctor Gary Hartstein. In any case, the FIA is well known for its zero tolerance of banned substance use and runs an education service for drivers about the dangers of mixing high-speed driving with drugs.

#6 Rascasse Gate, 2006 It was the final qualifying lap for the Monaco Grand Prix; if Fernando Alonso could finish his storming lap 0.064 ahead of Michael Schumacher he would reach pole – the vital position for the Circuit de Monaco. With the German’s chances of the position slipping from him by such a minuscule margin, his driving became “a touch too much”; he got it all wrong at Rascasse, locking up his front right tire and veering off across the exit of the right-hander. An innocent mistake you say but let’s not forget Alonso driving his last qualifier on a cert to see him at the front of the grid. But because of where Schumacher ended up, the qualifying session was called to a halt denying Alonso his pole-winning time. Coincidence or foul play? To this day the latter is denied but suspected by just about everyone in F1. In reality, only the most idiotic could avoid the conclusion that Schumacher had crashed deliberately to delay his rivals, yet he protested innocence. Ferrari’s anger at the stewards’ verdict – which saw him demoted to the back of the grid – put a downer on Schumacher’s final year in the sport.

#7 BAR Honda’s fuel tank, 2005 FIA regulations are sometimes hard to interpret but on other occasions, it’s fun to interpret them the way it suits. In 2005, constructor team BAR (British American Racing) were brought in front of the headmaster to explain why their cars weighed 594.6kg when completely emptied, rather than the sport regulation minimum of 600kg. Having taken Jensen Button to the podium and Takuma Sato to fifth in the San Marino Grand Prix of that year, stewards waited with baited breath for an explanation. None really came comprehensively, although when pressed the BAR team line was that their cars’ engines required a minimum of 6kg of fuel stored in a special collector to function. That the stewards’ inquiry accepted the verdict was a great relief to BAR but didn’t stop the FIA vetoing the result and requested BAR serve a year’s ban. Fortunately for BAR at a hearing in Paris, the FIA’s counter – although agreed upon by the Justices – did not result in a ban because a positive intent to cheat could not be proved. So let’s face it, why make something like that public? Until now.

#8 Senna vs. Prost Now, Hamilton and Alonso aren’t the only pair whose tiffs were unconvincingly covered up by the bosses. Take the curious case of Ayrton Senna and Alain Prost back in 1989. With the Japanese Grand Prix approaching, Prost made no secret of the fact he thought the 29-year-old Italian’s driving tactics were a little suss. Come the race at Suzuka, Prost got the better start of the two, jettisoning the Brazilian’s pole position advantage. But by lap 46 Senna had caught the Frenchman and as he overtook at a chicane Prost deliberately turned his car into Senna’s, taking them both out. Although Senna was able to re-join the race, he was disqualified soon afterwards, leading him to believe there was a conspiracy to make Prost champion. In 1990, Senna got his revenge as the pair collided yet again at Suzuka’s chicane. Running Prost off now ensured that Senna’s French rival couldn’t achieve a greater number of points and although speculation was rife the accident was still put down to just one of those things!

#9 Max Mosley – The Cover Up Hey, sex scandals happen; there’s probably one happening right now that we’ll only hear about in a year’s time. It doesn’t matter if someone is rich or poor there’s always a chem-sex party behind a closed door. Of course, the key to responsible partying is, as always: know your boundaries and stick to them. But back in 2007 then FIA president Max Mosley had another mantra in mind: and according to the press, it was last heard in a bunker in Berlin 72 years ago. Mosley became entangled in a bizarre sex scandal which execs of the sport again tried to cover up. No luck though because the News of the World got hold of a video which “allegedly” showed president Max enjoying Nazi-themed fun with some prostitutes. Mosley successfully sued the paper but didn’t argue about the authenticity of the tape; he just didn’t like the label of a Nazi-themed sex party. So, maybe National Socialist Leitmotif would have been more appropriate… and $92,000 cheaper.

#10 Bernie Ecclestone – The Sexist Let’s climb right to the very top of the F1 ladder and talk about Bernie Ecclestone, the recently usurped CEO and President of Formula One Management. A former racer and team owner, billionaire Ecclestone is one of the most prominent and well-known faces in F1 with his shock of silver hair, round glasses and occasional black eyes. The former F1 Supremo worked hard to bring success and money to the sport but he hasn’t been without scandal and controversy. To some, his behaviour has demonised himself against women, to others he is a boy-done-good saviour of the sport and all sins are forgiven. Either way, there is no denying some of the opinions of this 87-year-old have landed him in hot water. In 2005, Bernie showed us a glimpse of his brilliant mind when he suggested that “women should be dressed in white to match the appliances” and not satisfied with saying it once he said it again, causing just as much consternation. What’s more, in 2009, the Times quoted Ecclestone saying that “Hitler was a leader who could get things done”. Anyway, take from that what you will; we can only imagine what else he’s saying behind closed doors.

#11 Twin Chassis Lotus 88 – Circumventing The Technicalities Back in 1981, Lotus’s Colin Chapman, Peter Wright, Tony Rudd and Martin Ogilvie had a rather unique idea. According to Wikipedia, the twin-chassis design that supported their ongoing efforts to maximise the downforce produced by ground effects and could run a car to take corners faster than any other in the paddock. Chapman’s plan was simple: the inner chassis held the cockpit and was independently sprung from the outer one to take the pressures of ground effect, while the outer one was basically one big ground effect system from nose to tail. It was a clever idea and one that legendary designer Chapman argued fell within the strict technological guidelines of the F1 regulations, but rival teams did not agree with his optimistic naivety and protested. Lotus’ competitors were rightly incensed by the way in which Chapman was circumnavigating the regulations. Protests were lodged on the grounds that the twin chassis idea broke rules. Without much further discussion, the FIA banned the car and it never got the chance to race.

#12 Crash Gate 2008 Here’s a little more on Briatore’s staggeringly dodgy career. One of the most unforgivable and frankly reckless controversies in recent history was called ‘Crashgate’. It was a secret that execs managed to contain for only a year until Nelson Piquet Jr announced to the world that his Renault managers had instructed him to crash during the 2008 Singapore Grand Prix. Despite the arrogance of the top order assuming the motives for the crash would never be found out it became common knowledge that the subsequent safety car period following the crash helped promote team-mate Fernando Alonso to first place and claim the win. It was only after German-born Brazilian Piquet Jr was dropped from Renault mid-way through 2009 that he revealed he had been asked to deliberately sabotage the race. The team did not contest the charges; how could they? Renault F1’s managing director Flavio Briatore and the team’s executive director of engineering Pat Symonds left; the former given a lifetime ban from the sport, the latter banned for five years, although later overturned by a French court.

#13 United States Grand Prix, 2005 A Max Mosley foul-up back in 2005 made F1 a laughing stock in the heartland of American road racing but so too damaged relations with hugely influential Michelin. It was discovered only too late by main tire provider Michelin that the banked final turn of the Indianapolis circuit caused the side walls of its tires to collapse. Too late to do anything about and with seven teams relying on rubber, Mosley stepped up in absentia with masterminded idiocy and instructed drivers to take the corner at a snail’s pace. The better suggestion of constructing a makeshift chicane to bypass the corner was opposed although on what grounds no one is really sure, even after the Michelin-supplied teams offered to start from the back of the grid. In the end, Mosley’s terminal decision to bring the cars’ speed right down on the last bend was a sure sign that the sport was being governed by people who cared not one iota for the safety of the drivers, spectators or for that matter the techno partners.

#14 Minimum Weight Rules Against the rules, or just economical? This was the big question for execs in 1982 after a weight issue reared its head for constructors who realised that racing well against turbo-powered rivals was going to take more than a little tweak. A lighter car even without a turbo was the answer, but how to cheat the weigh-in was the question. It came down to Lotus’s Colin Chapman (familiar?) who devised a reserve water tank which when full at the pre-race weigh-in would provide the correct regulation weight. During the race, the water could be dumped and afford the car the advantage and before post-race weigh-in could be as easily topped-up as a kettle. Excellent results followed. However, when execs discovered the secret to their success their positions were disallowed. To some, this was an unfair judgement and politically motivated. The British teams boycotted the San Marino Grand Prix…and now you know why.

#15 Schumacher Returns Notwithstanding the controversy surrounding Rascasse-gate, Michael Schumacher is no stranger to on-track confrontation. The question is how much of it is team-led? We could be forgiven for thinking most of it is. With both drivers seeking the F1 crown at Adelaide in 1994, the German crashed into Damon Hill as the Englishman was overtaking, forcing the two of them to retire from the race. The race was won by Nigel Mansell but Schumacher won the championship… by a single point. Then again, in 1997 in Jerez, a repeat of the same manoeuvre against Jacques Villeneuve assured the cynical among us of Schumacher’s team’s tactical motivations. However this time the strategy backfired spectacularly as Villeneuve became F1 world champion and Schumacher was thrown out of the championship, discredited and sanctioned by the FIA.

Source: TheRichest

[materealgirl]

Has anyone else’s first week of 2017 been utter crap?  Mine has, and this blog post is a welcomed distraction to say the least.   And I am not even trying to carry over the “2016 was the worst year ever” BS that has been floating around social media.  In fact, lets go back to a perfectly lovely day in 2016.  Christmas.  Over Christmas I received some beauty items, in addition to a Sephora gift card from my in-laws.  So I figured I would share some of the aforementioned items and thoughts, as you do.  This goes without saying, but this post isn’t meant to be braggartly or boastful.  I am grateful for each gift, and enjoy sharing things with you all.  I am a simple human, and if you knew me IRL you would know, bragging isn’t really my style.

The first item on the docket is the Drunk Elephant Lippe.  I have been wanting to try this product out after hearing such good things about it from YouTuber/Blogger Jennifer Ross, of PrettyNeatLiving.com.  This product is not only supposed to moisturize your lips, but also add volume.  Now I have only been using this product for about a week, so I cannot say that I really see a difference at this point as far as volume.  I do feel like my lips are moisturized, and that is really all that I was looking for.  I wanted something that would plump my lips a bit, yes.  But only so that when I apply matte liquid lipstick, they didn’t look like crusty, cracked, shed and discarded snake skin.  I do not notice a distinct smell or flavor of this lip balm, if you are someone that is sensitive to scents.  The only downside to this lippe is the shape of the balm itself.  It is quite wide, and concave in the center.  This lends itself to an uneasy application for the first few times.  Other then that, I will have to follow up with you to let you know if I see a difference in lip volume over time.

Next we have an item featured on my 2016 Holiday Gift Guide – For Her.  The YSL Mon Paris Eau De Parfum.  I had received a sample of this with a Sephora catalog and fell in- love-at-first-sniff. Initially this fragrance is fruity, but I also detect a floral scent behind the fruit.  The fragrance notes listed on Sephora.com are as follows; Strawberry, Raspberry, Bergamot, Calone, Pear, Orange Flower, Jasmin Sambac, White Peony, Datura, Patchouli, White Musk, Ambrox, Cedarwood, and Crystal Moss.  It is heavenly.

The next item is a palette from Tarte that wasn’t even on my radar.  Crazy right?  Especially since I consider myself a beauty know-it-all.  This elusive Tarte palette is called the Double Duty Beauty Eye & Cheek in Classic Courage.  My mom picked this up for me for Christmas, because neutral warm tones are some of my favorites.  The colors in the Classic Courage palette are rose, copper and brown toned.  There are five eyeshadows and a blush included, and my favorite would have to be the blush.  It is the perfect rosy nude, and I have used it on both my eyes and cheeks.  All of the colors are pretty great, and the packaging is perfect for travel.  To be honest, I was hesitant about including this one because I cannot find it online.  So I’m not sure if it is even sold anymore. However,  I do believe my mother picked this one up at Ulta.  Anyway, I felt as though it should be shared just in case you can still find it at your local Ulta, or if Tarte decides to come out with something similar.

The Tarte Double Duty Beauty eye/cheek palette in Classic Courage, shown in natural lighting.

The Tarte Double Duty Beauty eye/cheek palette in Classic Courage, shown with flash.  

  If you saw my Sephora VIB 2016 Haul, you will know that I picked up the Kat Von D Studded Kiss Lipstick in the cult favorite Lolita.  Since then, I have been kicking myself for not also picking up the limited edition Lolita II.   I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the original Lolita.  Of course when I went back to my local Sephora to pick up Lolita II, they were out of stock!  To my surprise, I received Lolita II for Christmas from my fabulous mother.  She knows me so well.  Lolita II is everything I hoped it would be and more.  It is the perfect warmed toned, peachy nude, and I am glad to have it in my collection.

I’ve gone on and on before about the Kat Von D Ink Liner in other posts like My Makeup Essentials and Sephora VIB 2016 Haul.  To get you up to speed, in short, it is my all time favorite liquid eyeliner.  I usually only use the brown shade Hemingway, but I wanted to add black liner back into my rotation. So I figured why not try the Kat Von D Tattoo Liner?  I did just that, and picked up the classic black color Trooper.  The main difference that I have noticed is the applicator.  The Tattoo Liner has a brush tip, whereas the Ink Liner has a felt tip.  The brush applicator allows you to achieve a thinner line, which is a nice change.  It does require more precision though.  I also think the Tattoo Liner has more of a wet formula and a glossy finish.  Overall, I like it….However, I like the Ink Liner better.  What can I say?  I am a creature of habit.

The second to last product I picked up for myself on the recommendation of Makeup by Tiffany D.  She did a really pretty holiday sparkle look using the Urban Decay Liquid Moondust in the color Chem Trail.  Upon the first application, I was unsure about how I felt about this product.  If you are familiar with the original Urban Decay Moondust eye shadows, you will know they are all about the glitter.  This is a cream/liquid version of the original formula.  So if sparkle isn’t your thing, then don’t bother.  The Chem Trail color really appealed to me because I didn’t want anything obnoxious, and liked the idea of understated sparkle. And while you can definitely achieve that with this product, you can also easily go overboard if you apply too much.  The problems I am having are – one its gritty texture, and two the formula separates.  Once it is on it lasts all day.  Taking it off is just as painful as anything that contains glitter would be expected to be.  The verdict; I’m still uncertain if I will be keeping this one or not.

And lastly, this year as part of my “stocking stuffers,” I received two beautiful colors from the Essie Gel Couture collection, in addition to the gel topcoat. Remember when I said in my last post that my mom got every detail right, down to a particular nail polish color?  Well that color is  “off-duty style.”  I had tagged my sister in an Essie Facebook post with this color or a similar color, and my mom had taken notice.  She then went out of her way to find the green color, and got us each one.  The sweetest.

The formula of this nail polish is awesome!  I have only tried Off-Duty Style thus far, but it was incredibly opaque. It also applied smoothly, and the brush size and shape results in a much cleaner application.  The mistake I made was only applying one coat of the color itself.  Because the polish is SO opaque, I thought I didn’t really need a second coat.  That being said, the wear time probably would have been extended if I had applied a second coat of color.  I did get a good few days of wear, which is actually good for me.  I wash my hands frequently and have them in water constantly.  But like I said, I really believe that  I will have better results next time after applying two coats of color.

Holiday Beauty Haul Has anyone else’s first week of 2017 been utter crap? Mine has, and this blog post is a welcomed distraction to say the least.