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yougavemeyourheartyouknow · 7 months

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Childs play (Miguel O’Hara x fem! Reader [ex-Childhood best friend turned Fwb AU]) Part 1

Hiiiii! I’m so freaking excited for y’all to read this I’m literally shaking! This will only be 1 part. (Edit: I’ve changed my mind it will get a second part but it won’t be put right away) Shout out to @chickenshit03 for beta reading the one shot. Absolute sweetheart 🫶🏼. Not proofread, enjoy!!

(Y/N)-Your name.

NSFW!! SMUT!! MDNI!! Cursing, light choking during the deed , protecting PinV, Miguel being a big meanie near the end, Comfort/Hurt, lmk if I can’t think of anymore

Word count: 4.6k

Part 2

Masterlist

—

Knock knock…

“Hello, I’m sorry if I’m intruding but I wanted to introduce myself, me and my family just moved in next door and I wanted to introduce ourselves.” Your mother said as she stood at her neighbors door, you hid timidly behind her leg as she spoke to a Hispanic woman with curly dark hair. Your eyes wandered around her living room, or at least as much as you could catch from your spot. Not paying any mind to the conversation they were having when your eyes spotted a young boy around your age, about five or so walking past with a few legos in hand.

Your shyness was quickly overtaken with curiosity as you went to pull on your mother’s hand, she must have been watching you stare at the brunette, because before you could even turn up to ask her if you could go play, she was already shooing you in the direction of him as her and the other lady went to go talk over coffee in the kitchen.

He didn’t glance up at you as you sat down in front of his spot on the living room floor, being too preoccupied on the Star Wars set he was working on.

“Hi.”

“My name’s (Y/N).”

“Cool.”

“What’s your name?”

“Miguel.”

You paused, shifting to sit down better before speaking again.

“Can I help? I love legos.”

He stayed quiet, and for a second you think he’ll say no, until he shrugged and moved the instruction book so you both could read it, making your lips come up in a smile.

“Sure.”

—

“You can teach me to play street fighter a million times and I will never understand it.” You huffed as you dropped the controller on your lap and leaned back on the couch, the tv in his living room sounded out a “finish her” as Miguel’s character killed yours, you couldn’t even be bothered to remember the names, peeved off that’d he beat you for the upteenth time, him not even having the courtesy to let you win one round.

“I’m not gonna be sorry for you being bad.” He retorted in a teasing tone, sticking out his tongue at you, and blew a raspberry. Your arms quickly crossover your chest as you puff your cheeks out with a pout.

“You’re so mean to me Miguel, I hate you.” You mumbled the half-lie to the other ten year old, looking away as you felt your cheeks heat with embarrassment, you didn’t even notice his movements until you felt him grab for your hand, turning your head to realize he was now standing in front of your spot on the couch.

“You don’t hate me, I’m your best friend.” He states, making you nod your head in confirmation after a beat, “Good. Because you’re my best friend too.” You smiled.

“Can we play something else then?”

“Nope.”

“Ughhh.”

—

“(Y/N), it’s your turn to spin the bottle.” Mj’s voice snapped you out of your head, suddenly aware of all the other fourteen years olds turning to stare at you. Was it a bit embarrassing you were about to lose your first kiss in a game of spin the bottle?

Half-dried nail-polished fingers gently grabbed the base of the empty Coke bottle, praying to god no one saw the way your hand trembled slightly, as you gave it a good twist. As your eyes tracked the blur of clear glass, you got your lower lip, silently hoping it was someone who you wouldn’t fluster up in embarrassment when you had to tell them who was your first kiss in the four walls of the lunch room. Like Kyle, or Ben or-

“Oooo- you got Miguel!” One of the other girls giggled as your eyes shot up to where the tip was pointing and surely, there he sat in front of you. Miguel was good…yeah, great even! You trusted him, he was your best friend since you were practically in dippers…So with a fine silent look of confirmation, you crossed the circle, closing your eyes as your lips connected for the first time.

Is it normal for your heart to skip a beat during a kiss? God how red is my face right now? Have I been holding it for too long? I wonder if he’s enjoying it, he hasn’t pulled away so that’s a good sign right? I should probably stop now. It's been like four seconds.

You finally pull away, sitting down on your knees as you bring a hand up to wipe some excess saliva away from the cover of your mouth. The sound of the next person going to spin the bottle muffles out around you as you focus on the weird flutter in your stomach.

—

“SLOW DOWN MIG-YOU’RE DRIVING LIKE A MANIAC!” You yelled as your left hand flew to grab at your seat belt, right hand gripping the overhead handle so hard your knuckles were turning white, pushing yourself as much as you could into the passenger seat at you could while he just let out an eye roll and chuckle as you were being dramatic (you weren’t).

“I’m not taking driving advice from someone who doesn’t have their license yet.”

“You got your license yesterday! I don’t turn sixteen for another four months!”

“Don’t care, you could ever shut up or take the bus.”

You couldn’t respond right away because another scream came from your throat as he turned a corner.

“If I die in this stupid car, I’m going to haunt the shit out of you O’Hara!”

“I’m not gonna let you die, stop being dramatic.” He scoffed, finally pulling up to the school parking lot, finally slowing down as he looked for a place to park. His arm comes around the back of your car seat as he goes to backwards park in an empty spot. “See I didn’t let you die.”

“I’m actually traumatized…” You muttered, eyes still wide as you kept still in your seat. Miguel let out a huff and he goes to take your seatbelt off once the car was shut off.

“If I buy you some subway during lunch will you stop complaining?”

“…yes.”

—

“Maybe I could just take a gap year-or-or go to the community college nearby, just until I can transfer, then I can try for Columbia again?” You kept fumbling your words, looking at the rejection letter in your hands. If you tried to focus on it enough, you’d be able to hear the paper shaking lightly in your hands. Glossy eyes trying to rapidly blink away tears before they fell on the paper. Miguel quickly shook his head as he placed his coffee cup down on the table of the cafe you two would frequent.

“No. Not happening, I’ll just reject my application and we can go to Stanford together in California.” He told you, making you copy his actions as you placed the paper down next to your other University letters.

“Are you crazy? That’s your dream school! I am not letting you do that for me. I’d never forgive myself for that.” You admitted, looking at him in those familiar brown eyes, praying to god yours weren’t growing bloodshot from the emotional moment between you both. Miguel letting out a heavy sigh, his hand going to run through his pushed back brown locks as he looked down at his letters again. The silence that grew over you two was almost suffocating, a thing it never felt like around him. It made your heart ache, trying to keep back a whine and some tears as you closed your eyes and took in a shaky breath before opening them again and finally breaking the silence between you both. “I mean…FaceTime is a thing right?” Miguel raised a brow at your sentence, before it clicked in his mind what you were implying. Quickly shaking his head, his hand coming up to stop you.

“No. No. I can’t even go a week without seeing you, I’ve lived next door to you for thirteen years and you expect me to be okay with us being two thousand miles away from each other!?” You glanced around you when Miguel raised his voice slightly, luckily other than you and the owner the place was practically barren.

“Mig, we’ll figure it out! We’ll call and text, FaceTime, and I’ll come back for breaks! And besides, you don’t strike me as a type to enjoy California.” You attempted to lighten the mood, thankfully being met with an amused grunt and his lip twitching up slightly.

“Fine… just, promise we aren’t going to end up like all those friends who stop talking because we’re going to separate college’s alright?”

Your smile grew. “I promise.”

—

Ring…

Rin- “Hey it’s Miguel,” your ears perked up, quickly scrambling up from your position on your bunk bed, where you were laying on your stomach, “I can’t come to the phone right now, leave me a message.” Beep.

“Hey Miguel… just wanted to see how you were, I finished my exams for the semester, and I’m going back to Neuva York tomorrow. I wanted to see if you’d want to hang out during the break, let me know… bye…” You mumbled before you hung up the call, tossing your phone on the other side of your bed. Running your hands through your head, letting out a heavy sigh. Closing your eyes to keep any forming tears of frustration from spilling out.

You and Miguel weren’t as close as you’d like to be anymore. How did a few months apart completely unwind the tight knit threat that had kept you both close for years? It had started out well, you did good at keeping your side of the promise and he did as well. Texting every hour, FaceTiming him every weekend, calling every night while you both studied, it almost felt like nothing had changed.

Then, classes became harder, you’d both start to develop new friends, new routines. The text became less frequent, now lagging to every few days, FaceTime sessions were now non-existent and your daily calls now became monthly, never lasting more than half an hour. You hated how you two were growing apart, and it hurt to see that Miguel didn’t seem to care. You didn’t have to see him in person to notice his new friend group was starting to change his personality. He was starting to seem more stoic, dry, it almost seemed like he was constantly agitated or something of the sort when you finally would get a hold of him. Still… despite the gradual change he seemed to be going through you still had hope that deep down he was still the same old Miguel you had grown to love and cherish. And that spark of hope only grew when you heard the faint buzz of your phone from the foot of your bed, quickly grabbing it to read a new message.

Text me when you get in tomorrow.

—

This was not what you had in mind.

Somehow Miguel had convinced you to go to some random bar that didn’t ID with him and his college buddies. “I’ll be fun” he said, “you’ll love them” he said. Now here you were forced to listen to some snobby trust fund kid bitch and moan about how he had to inherit his father’s company and blah blah blah. You weren’t even paying attention anyways, his words were going into one ear and flying out the other, opting to sip on your mixed drink to help keep you from banging your head into the bar counter. Tonight had simply e been the worst. Not to mention Miguel had been acting… different.

Maybe he just wasn’t good with distance, but it still struck you as odd how the second you were both finally in close proximity it was almost as if nothing had happened, like your friendship with each other wasnt badly strained for weeks on end. It didn’t stop there though, no no no. Because now that you were with him in front of his new friends and all dolled up he had been more… touchy, and not in a way he had been before.

A hand on your thigh, an arm around your waist, a finger idly twisting and twirling your hair. It was so… intimate… like he wanted them to think there was something there that was more than just a childhood friend. You couldn’t say that you hated it, it was just unexpected.

“Hey… let’s get out of here?” Miguel’s whisper snapped you out from your thoughts. The way his voice murmured lowly against your shoulder as he all but rubbed against it like a cat making your cheeks flare up and a shiver ran down your back. Quickly ignoring the feeling of the spike in your heart rate and the wetness growing in your panties, nodding as you go to stand up, not wanting to be in the over cramped bar any longer and just waiting to head back to Miguel’s place since you were staying there for a week. Feeling like your knees were going to give out from underneath you when he slid his large hand from between your shoulder blades and upwards to squeeze your right shoulder.

Not sure if your hazy mind was from the alcohol or from his actions anymore. Not sure if things would go back to how they were before you’d left when he went to leave sloppy wet kisses on your neck as soon as his apartment door was closed and locked. Not sure if you could look at him the same way after he made you see stars from the comfort of his sheets. Still you couldn’t stop. It felt too good, he felt too good.

“Fuck- felt so fucking good…” He hissed as he pulled out from between your legs, taking a moment to let himself to catch his breath before rolling the condom off and tossing it in the trash can. You didn’t respond, still out of it from the aftermath of experiencing nirvana in the form of drunk sex. Letting out a sigh as you turned to your side and closed your eyes as drowsiness starts to seep into your bones. Feeling the other side of the bed dip before a strong arm came around to hug your waist.

“…Miguel?”

“Yeah?”

“This… was a one time thing right?”

A pause, a heavy sigh before you felt his soft lips kiss the nape of your neck.

“… of course.”

—

A flash of light shined through the darkness of your studio apartment. You didn’t even need to check the notification screen in order to know who it was. Only one person would text you at two in the morning.

Come over?

If you told your high school self that the only time you ever saw Miguel was in the deeps of night while you were tangled in his sheets, she would have thought you were lying. The most fucked up part was that it was starting to affect you mentally, how your best friend had turned into a booty call because of one night from a drunk fuck seven years ago, it was painfully obvious you’d never get to the point where you’d be able to go back to the way you both once were. You couldn’t help but cling to the last broken bits he was willing to give you though. So every time he calls or texts you at random hours of the night since you’ve moved back to Nueva York, you’d show up at his doorstep like you are now.

“I know it’s late, I'm sorry, these Master exams are kicking my ass.” He apologized while letting you in after a few seconds. Closing and locking the front door before gently pushing you against it, his lips already finding their usual spot against the crook of your neck. Calloused hands began to slip underneath the baggy material of your hoodie, his large fingers gently grazing the exposed skin, you’ve learned to stop wearing shirts to these sessions a long time ago. “Need to blow off some steam…”

“Miguel…”The way you’d breathe out his name always made him feel like he had died and gone to heaven, your hands wandering upwards against the black fabric of his tank top. His lips separated from the blossoming red and purple mark they left in their wake so he can pull your jacket off before stripping off his own shirt. Your arms quickly wrap around his neck, any guilt that had been lingering in your mind quickly melted away when his hands ran down to your hips underneath your waistband, thumb fidgeting with the thin fabric of your panties. “Need you-“

“Need you too Cariño.” He muttered before going to place a gentle peck against the edge of your lips, you couldn’t help but let out a small whimper at the movement. You’ve noticed he never kisses you directly on your lips, always on the edge, on your neck or cheek. You would have felt your heart ache if the feeling of your core throbbing when his hand dragged your bottoms down to squeeze your ass wasn’t more overwhelming, lifting you up to wrap your legs around his waist.

Half of the time you two didn’t even make it to the bedroom, finding a spot on the hallway wall or against the kitchen counter. This was one of those times, he stumbled over to the couch, too distracted on leaving hickies all over your chest and dipping his fingers into your wet cunt. You let out a gasp when you landed on the brown leather rather harshly, making the couch move a few inches from its original spot due to the weight of both of your bodies hastily climbing on top of it. He made quick work to strip the rest of your clothes from both of your bodies once he made sure you hadn’t accidentally hit your head. Quickly slipping a condom before lining himself up.

“Fuuuuck-fuck…” He groaned, as he pushed the tip of his cock between your folds. Your mouth falls open in a silent scream from the deliciously painful stretch that he always provides. Giving you a second to adjust to his length and girth before pulling out and slamming his hips against yours, each thrust making your silent whimpers and whines turn into pornographic moans and incoherent babblings. “Love filling you up. You love this cock don’t you?” He taunts, it was so cruel the way the words fell from his mouth but you loved it nonetheless. Nodding rapidly as you gushed around him for the first time tonight.

“Nah uh… need to heard you say it. Use your words.” He smirks, enjoying the plop plop sound that started to quietly reverberate off the walls of his living room. Glancing down momentarily to watch a thin layer of cum that was forming a ring around the base of his cock. “Tell me how much you love it.” He urged.

“Fuck-fuck… love it so much.” You moaned, overstimulated from your orgasm, squirming underneath him just the way he liked. He couldn’t help the way his ego swells at the way you feel apart for him.

“Don’t know what I’d do without you.” He cooed as he propped your leg over his shoulder to get a better angle, his sweet words always messed with your foggy mind. “Such a sweet little thing, all for me.”

“Don’t-don’t say that Mig.” You whined, head turning to the side, as your hand dropped from his chest to drop off the couch. His right hand quickly leaves your hip and runs up to your neck, keeping his grip light as he props your head back to face him with his index finger.

“Aww poor baby, can’t handle when I talk all sweet to her, huh?” He let out an airy half chuckle. Despite the honey-like toned he’d use, the underlying taunt was always present. “Let me make it up to you baby.”

Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as he thrust deeper into your core, making your hips subconsciously jump up to meet his.

“Mig-Miguel, I’m so-so close.” You whimpered and whined, clenching around his length, his hips stuttering slightly as you felt the heat building in your lower belly start to grow with each thrust.

“Cum with me baby… Cum all over this cock.” He groaned.

“Fuck-Fuck.” With one final thrust, you finally came undone around him, his name falling from your lips over and over like a mantra. Miguel followed suit, stopping his thrust while fully inside your cunt, letting out a deep groan as he came.

“Shit… You okay?” He asked once he was able to collect himself enough, climbing off top of you before rolling the used condom off his softing member, picking up his forgotten boxers and placing them back on.

“Mhm…” You nodded, trying to stabilize yourself on shaky arms and legs. Miguel seemed to have noticed, picking up your clothes from the floor and making his way over to hand them to you.

“Let me get you some water.” He said before retreating to his kitchen. The only sound in the air now was the faint noises of him rustling around his cabinets, and the quiet shuffling of clothes. Hating the feeling of putting your legging and hoodie back on due to the thin layer of sweat still on your skin. Once you were decent enough Miguel came back with a glass of water and handed it to you. Mumbling a “thank you” before taking a sip. Miguel cleared his throat as he sat down on the other edge of the couch, eyes cast down, hands rubbing anxiously together, finally deciding to break the steadily growing awkward silence. “Look, (Y/N), I wanted to talk to you about something… something kinda important.”

You raised a brow, noticing the sudden change in his behavior, taking another quick sip before placing the half empty glass on his coffee table. “What’s up?”

He released a heavy sigh as he brought a hand up to scratch the back of his neck, still not making eye contact as he continued. “I’m not sure how to say this, so I’ll just put it out there…” He finally brought his gaze up to meet yours, “We need to stop seeing each other.”

Huh?

“I’m sorry what?” The words came out of your mouth before you could stop, your face quickly filling up with confusion and a bit of disbelief as you stood up. Miguel follows your actions as he puts his hands up in defense, but you continue before he could try explaining. “You can’t just fuck me on your couch then tell me afterwards we need to stop. You know how much of an asshole you sound?”

“I know, I know it makes me sound like an asshole.” He tried to reason with you, going to finally put on his shorts and tank top that were still on the floor. Not feeling like being half-naked during this conversation. “Look, there’s this girl I’ve been seeing and it’s getting pretty serious-“

“A girl you’ve been seeing?” You repeated in disbelief. “You can’t be for real.”

“Well, we never agreed to be exclusive. It’s not like we were going to start dating or anything.”

Ouch.

You had to turn away so they didn’t see the tears building in the corner of your eyes, but even with your face hidden your body language gave you away.

“I know we weren’t exclusive but fuck Miguel.” You shake your head, going to make your way to the door. “I’ve known you since we were five and you’re just gonna throw me away like some old toy?!”

“Hey-no. That’s not-that’s not what I mean, you know that.” He takes a step forward, grabbing your arm before you could get too far. “We can’t sleep together anymore, but we can still be friends.” You couldn’t help the scoff that left your lips, finally gathering yourself enough to pull your arm away and face him again, not caring if he saw the tears cascading down your cheeks. He’s made you cry one too many times, it’s about time he saw what he did to you. “We can still be friends! You’re still my best friend (Y/N)!” He couldn’t help but let his voice come out in more of a panic, a bit more rushed. You quickly shook your head.

“No. No, we aren’t best friends anymore Miguel, we haven’t been in a long, long time. I know that, you know that. So don’t pretend like we are just because your afraid of losing your emotional support fuck buddy.” You finally head toward the door and towards your car in the driveway, not turning to face him as you hear him call your name. “Don’t call me, don’t text me. If you're as serious about this girl as you say you are, you’d do the right thing and block me. Because I’m so tired of waiting around and pretending like one day you’ll wake up and realize I’m in love with you.”

You froze once the words came out, hand still on the car door handle as you came to the realization you finally admitted the secret you’ve been holding for the past ten years. Your free hand going to cover your mouth as you finally turn to look at Miguel, the look of shock from the confession was evident. You shook your head as you attempted to back track.

“Wait, Miguel I didn’t mean to tell you that-it just happened-“

“… You should leave.” His voice suddenly became stoic, his face hardening so it was hard to read his emotions. “This is just helping my case. Leave.” The tears flowed harder down your face as he slammed the front door shut. Leaving you to sob into the emptiness of the night as you finally let all the pain from the last seven years catch up to you.

You weren’t surprised to see your text bubbles turn green the next morning.

—

“I really think this one is it.”

“Me too!”

“He’ll love you in that dress.”

“Aww I can already see the waterworks.”

All you could do was smile, your hands repeatedly smooth non-existent wrinkles as you looked at yourself in the mirror, you looked like a real life princess. After what felt like hours you finally found the wedding dress. You couldn’t be happier.

“Alright Miss future Osborn.” Your maid of honor squealed, finally getting your attention, “You need to get out of that dress, you need to meet up Harry to look over the venue.”

You sighed, as you turned back to admire the white wedding dress one more time. “You’re right, I don’t wanna keep him waiting just cause I can’t stop staring at myself.” You giggled, before heaving to the back.

You and Harry have been dating for four years now, and he had proposed last month during your anniversary. You couldn’t be happier, he treats you like a queen, better than any other Man you’ve ever been in romantic contact with.

Once you had finally finished changing out of your regular clothes, you grabbed your phone out of your purse. Sending a quick text telling him that you found a dress, before doing a quick check on insta, wanting to look at the engagement pictures you posted on your page last week. But the soft smile on your face quickly dropped, like your heart did to your stomach when you checked your activity page.

Miguel.Ohara.99 and 4 others liked your post.

Miguel.Ohara.99 started following you.

1 message request from Miguel.Ohara.99

Fuck.

—

Taglist: @famouscattale @strawberryjuice9 @loser-alert @maomaimao @franceseca-the-1st @scaryplanetdestroyer @miguels-aranita @beezusvreeland @raginghomo62 @miguelbaby @thedevax @vera4luv @alialucille

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hannieween · 6 months

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after dark | city lights series | h.js

It all started with a deal with your next door neighbor, Joshua Hong. A little harmless deal that surprisingly led you to finding love; and a part of yourself that you were still discovering.

✮ pairings: joshua hong x female reader ✮ genre: fluff, angst, smut (18+) ✮ aus: rock singer joshua, boyfriend joshua, ldr ✮ word count: 22.3k

›🎧: underwater – red velvet | deep deep sleep – woodz | water – ten

→ previous chapters

› nsfw warnings under the cut

✮ warnings: alcohol consumption (no dubcon), smut with plot, dom joshua, brat reader, reader is on the pill, foul language, dirty talk, unprotected p in v sex, creampies [a lot of these], cumplay, spit play, oral sex (m, f), multiple orgasms, phone sex, guided masturbation, use of sex toys (rabbit vibrator), sextapes, manhandling, quickie, anal play, praise/degradation kink, breeding kink, exhibitionism: sex in semi public spaces, brat taming: spanking, bondage (belt); pet names: sweetheart, princess, baby, bunny (hers) handsome, baby, babe, baby boy (his)

✮ this was proofread by the amazingly talented @cvntrlseecvntrlvee thank you for helping me with ideas, and for being there to witness drunk v writing that quickie hehe

✮ disclaimer: minors dni this post is intended for 18+ readers ONLY. please have your age stated in your description and try not to look like a bot please 🙂.

part viii — part one

The ride back home was characterized by an unpleasant silence, only interrupted by your crying. It wasn't a loud, snotty weeping, you just kept silently gathering tears, sobbing every now and then.

But your boyfriend's best friend noticed. Every time you brought your hand to wipe away tears with the sleeve of your sweater, you'd feel his swift gaze on you as he kept driving.

"Do you want to grab some food? Are you okay?" Yoon Jeonghan asked once, his tone tentative and cautious.

"I'm fine," you smiled sheepishly. "I'm okay. I'm just a bit of a crybaby."

"Oh, don't say that," he responded calmly. "You're allowed to cry, it's okay."

You laughed meekly. "Is this a good first impression?" you wondered out loud. "I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about that," he said while eyeing you with a polite smile on his face. "You know, Joshua asked me to get you home, but I also wanted to meet you ever since he told me about you," he mentioned briefly and with a simple tone.

You turned to see the man you knew almost nothing about. "He's told you about me?"

Jeonghan scrambled for words. You noticed his shifty eyes and when he parted his lips, "I, uh, don't wanna get myself in trouble," he chuckled embarrassedly. "He just told me that he was seeing someone."

You narrowed your eyes, spotting his clear lie but decided not to press.

"You need to understand—Joshua has never been this serious with anyone in the years I've known him," he told you, eyeing you and the road. "And I've known him for a long time. So when he told me that he was serious about you... I knew I had to meet you."

"I find that hard to believe, him being single for years. I know, he's told me but," you pointed with a small laugh. "I mean, Joshua is..."

Jeonghan shifted a little in his seat. "Yeah, yeah, I know. Eyebrow piercing, emo boy, hard to resist," he chuckled. "Yes, that guy, single. I guess he's told you that he had some flings here and there but never committed."

"He doesn't–hasn't told me much about his past relationships," you told your boyfriend's best friend. "We actually don't talk about that, either his or my own past relationships."

"That's fair," he hummed, shifting the grip on the steering wheel to one hand, while he decided to rest the other on the windowsill. "But don't think that there's some tragic backstory, or whatever that's made him like this. Shuji was always set on growing his musical career before chasing someone."

You stifled a laugh. "Suppose I got lucky, then."

"Maybe you both are just lucky," he muttered, eyes set on the road ahead.

"So how did you two meet?" you wondered. "If you don't mind me asking."

"We met through another friend," he eyed you curiously. "Choi Seungcheol, you've met him?"

"I don't think I have, no," you frowned and then your mouth parted. "Oh! Is it the bar owner?"

Jeonghan nodded. "That's the one," he gave you an amused smile. "Now the story of how we actually met is something I decidedly shouldn't tell you," he chuckled again and darted a look at you. "Ask your boyfriend."

"Why, is it bad?" you asked innocently.

"No, not bad. Nothing is bad if you have a good excuse," he let out a low cackle. "It was a really fun night. I lost a lot of money," he coughed a bit, steering the wheel with one hand.

"Mmph, that only generates more questions, you know," you scoffed and he only gave you a grin in response.

"Your turn, then," he looked at you when the car stopped at a red light. "How did you meet Joshuji? Of course, if that's a story you would like to share."

Joshuji. Your stomach twisted at the sound of the fond nickname.

"I uh, I have really bad sleeping habits," you started with some shyness, but there was something in the nature of your boyfriend's best friend. He seemed inviting and familiar.

"Ah, really?" his eyebrows shot up.

You nodded, continuing: "I went to his door one day to tell him to stop playing his guitar because I couldn't sleep, thinking it was really early in the morning to be playing on speakers," you chuckled awkwardly. "Turns out that it was well past noon. And I was still in pjs, sleep deprived and cranky."

"Mmmn," he nodded with thought. "I have bad sleep habits too."

"Oh no, I'm sorry to hear that," you replied pitifully.

"Don't be. I'm used to it," he replied quickly, drawing in a breath before he pulled to the curb. "And there you go, Ms. Hong. Arrived home safe."

"Thank you for the ride," you smiled, gathering your bearings and before you could step out of his fancy car you turned to see the man. "Let me compensate you in some way."

His eyebrows pushed up. "I'm sorry?"

"Yeah, let me buy you lunch or so-something," you replied shyly. "I owe you."

He snorted a laugh. "Ever heard of friends? You owe me nothing."

You looked away, trying to hide the evident shame you felt and probably showed in your face. "I also want to know more about you... and Joshua."

"Ah, then you should've said it like that," he tutted, a smile threatening to break on his face. "Lunch is alright."

The first weekend went by slowly.

Thankfully, you had a lot of work to bury yourself in, such as signing books, preparing and green lighting stuff for the book promotions. You were surprised to see that your agency had secured you round a of interviews, so you had to prepare for that too.

One morning you were returning to your apartment, a bag of fresh groceries in your arms, when you saw a tall man standing outside your door. Your stomach twisted at the sight, and your first instinct was to think of Joshua, even if that was quite improbable.

But the man faced the door, and you caught sight of his sharp nose and slightly curly dark hair hiding beneath a black beanie. You suddenly realized that you'd seen this man before, and it was your neighbor.

"Hi," you chirped, making the man turn to you now. "Seokmin, right?"

"Hi, there," he gave you a toothy grin. "That's right. I'm just here to drop by some things that Joshua left in our old apartment. Is it alright if I drop them with you?"

"Yeah, of course," you replied, noticing the cardboard box in his arm. You reached to open up the door and stepped inside. "You can leave it on the table, it's fine."

"Thanks," he muttered. "That's all he left behind, that's it for me. Have a nice day!"

And with that, you were barely uttering a phrase in goodbye when Seokmin walked out your door, turning down to the elevator instead to what used to be Joshua's apartment. A hollow feeling invaded you when it dawned on you that the place was finally empty now.

With a long sigh, you closed your door and turned to the box on the table. You decided to pry inside it, to find some pillowcases neatly folded, a bottle of shampoo, a black cap, sunglasses, a protein shaker and a pair of training gloves.

You gave yourself the freedom to empty the box and find a place for these items in your bedroom. Joshua had left two large sound amplifiers in your apartment already, so you saw no reason why you shouldn't find somewhere to keep his other stuff.

You were just leaving the bottle of shampoo in the shower when you caught the tangy smell of citrus, like fresh lemonade or the tangerine splash when you peel off the juicy fruit. It instantly reminded you of the smell of Joshua's hair, the smell you swore lingers in the pillow he used the last time he slept with you.

Joshua had been gone for two days, and you were getting by just fine. He called once a day and texted whenever he could. But the truth was that he kept busy, and had little time to even catch up with you.

So in an attempt to distract yourself from the gut wrenching feeling you got from missing him, you went into your room and lay down on the bed, scrolling mindlessly on your phone.

That's when you were reminded of the videos Joshua had sent the night he arrived at his hotel room. He made no comment about it, just dropped them in the conversation he shared with you and you hadn't had the opportunity to watch them. Until now.

The videos Joshua sent you were of the last night you had sex with him. One video started and the first thing that caught your eye was your face. Your heart sank at the first glimpse of what his view was when he fucked you: the camera flash hit your eyes and you grimaced slightly, but you could see in the video, despite it all, your lust-blown eyes looking at him expectantly.

It was the first time you saw yourself in this position. Lying face up to him, your head in the pillows, hair spread all over them. In that second, you could feel yourself heating up when you saw yourself like this. And your arms were framing your head and your wrists, god—bound by rope tightly and tied up to your headboard. Joshua's hand came into the frame, and the angle of the camera shifted down to your naked body, thus showing his.

A burning sensation rushed inside you when you saw his cock, fully hard, as Joshua gripped it in his hand. He kept his thumb on top of his veiny, thick shaft. Your mouth watered as you saw him guiding it to your core.

A desperate need to feel what your eyes were watching overwhelmed you so badly that you had to pause the video and put your phone down. You were surprised at the response of your body, your accelerated heart, the excitedness coursing through your veins, buzzing in your ears. You knew you had to do something about it.

You felt your pulse beneath your hot skin as you tugged your shorts down with one hand, dragging your wet panties along and finished taking them off by kicking them with your feet.

Pushing your knees up, you parted your thighs slightly, only to sneak one hand in and let out a sigh upon feeling just how wet you were already.

Your free hand scrambled in your bed, blindly searching for your phone and you tapped play to resume watching Joshua's hand, guiding his pretty cock inside you. The reddened cockhead nudged in your entrance—just as your fingers glided in your wetness, your mind went blank, subdued by the need to recreate what you felt that night.

"Fuck," Joshua muttered when he sheathed himself completely inside you, his voice sounded soft in the video, making you shudder in ecstasy as your fingers toyed with your clit.

The first video ended there. But the next one was even dirtier. As you continued rubbing your clit, your eyes watched Joshua's point of view, as he fucked you slowly. You saw his cock disappearing inside you, and then pulling back out, glistening wet from his arousal and your own.

The faces you made, the noises that escaped your parted lips, your lust-lidded eyes as you kept them trained on him. You remembered then that you were getting more aroused by seeing his own enjoyment, the pleasure he got from having you bound to your bed.

You also heard his breathing through the video, though you couldn't see his face. You ached to see him, to feel him again as the second video came to an end.

The videos were on loop as you worked on your poor throbbing pussy and you came while watching them over and over again. You felt pathetic, tired, furiously needy, and you know a couple of videos wouldn't suffice.

"Joshua, Joshua..." you chanted until your voice was hoarse, your body twitching in your bed.

You had tossed your phone on the pillow beside your head, only getting by the memory of him fucking you, and the sound of the low grunts caught on the video. You touched yourself until your fingers were worn, your poor pussy so wet you couldn't even touch your clit properly without the pads of your fingers slipping.

A chilling shudder shook your body when your phone started buzzing beside your head. You turned to look at the pop-up tab above the video of your boyfriend fucking you. Only to see that he was calling you.

"He-hello?" you croaked and cleared your throat. "Hi."

"Hi, bunny," your boyfriend sighed contentedly. "Am I interrupting something?"

You moved your hand from between your legs and rested it on top of your lower tummy.

"No, not at all," you lied and your voice betrayed you completely.

"Sure, baby? I can call later. I just got to the hotel room and was thinking of catching up with you," he hummed happily, you heard him groan when you assumed by the noise at the other end that he just threw himself onto a bed.

"I'm fine, Josh," you sighed, thinking of what to say. "Ha-how was your day?"

"Are you sick, baby? You sound a little hoarse–,"

"I'm okay," you gulped nervously and closed your eyes shamefully: "I was watching the videos you sent me."

Joshua paused for a second only. "Oh, my sweet girl, you should've just said that," he cooed and you knew by his tone that he was smiling: "Were you touching yourself, baby?"

"I–," you choked out nervously. "Yeah."

"Don't let me stop you, sweetheart," he purred with his honeyed voice and you squeezed your eyes, shaking with a violent shudder that demanded you to continue pleasuring yourself.

"Joshua," you blurted, your voice high and shaky. "I need you."

"What do you need from me, baby? Sounds like you were at it for quite some time, am I right?" he said tauntingly.

"I need you Josh,—I can't anymore," you mumbled coyly.

"You can't what, baby?" he asked, sounding amused and when you didn't give him an immediate reply, he just assumed. "Did you tease that pretty pussy until you can't come anymore?"

"Can you help me? Please Josh," you sighed pathetically, trying to ignore the throbbing of your walls.

"Get your rabbit dildo," he instructed without skipping a beat.

That drew a triumphant grin from you, getting up from your bed you walked to your dresser, where you kept your toys inside a box and got the vibrator. "How did you know I wasn't using my toys?"

"A feeling," he hummed sweetly. "Did you like the videos, baby?"

You settled back in your bed, dildo in one hand, phone in the other pressing against your ear. "Yeah, I did. I wish you recorded for longer, though."

"Maybe I did it on purpose," he replied in a low tone. "Maybe I just wanted you to have a little reminder."

"But I want more," you whined with a pout, knowing that the whiny tone in your voice would work on him. "I need you so bad, Joshua."

"Turn it on," he purred and you carried out his order immediately. When he heard the faint buzzing of your vibrator, he added: "I miss you too, baby. You have no idea. I miss you. I miss your lips. I want you to kiss me more when we make love, will you do that, baby?"

"Ye-yeah, Josh," you stammered. "I will do anything you want me to."

"Mm, baby, you're so good," he sighed softly. "So fucking good to me. Put the tip in, bunny—slowly."

"Mmnah," you moaned as soon as the tip came into contact with your throbbing pussy and you pushed in, slowly as he indicated, but then the slow thrusting motion of the dildo made you squirm a little. "Joshua–,"

"Don't push it all the way in, not yet," he directed, knowing full well that you would do just as he said. So you didn't let the shaft go all the way into the additional part of the dildo that would massage your clit.

"Josh," you sighed, biting back a moan as the slow thrusting of the dildo worked on your pussy. But still, it was not enough.

"I also miss the way you feel around me," he said with a low groan and you shuddered again, delighting over the fact that he too was aroused. "You feel... You feel like nothing else, baby. So fucking addictive."

"Are you–, are you touching yourself too, Josh?" you asked with a high-keen pitch.

"Mm, yeah. I am baby," he purred softly and your body responded with an ecstatic shudder. The truth is he got hard the moment he knew you were playing with yourself.

So there he was, sprawled in his hotel bed, completely naked, cock in his hand languidly pumping himself. "I need you too, bunny. Need to feel you."

You let out a whiny moan in response, feeling like his words were doing more work on your body than the dildo thrusting inside your walls slowly and rhythmically. "Fuck," you whispered. "I need to feel you too, Josh. It–it's not the same."

"Of course it's not the same, bunny," he groaned softly and you heard a soft sigh that resembled a smile. "Does my sweet girl miss my cock?"

You swallowed hard. "Ye-yeah. I miss you, Josh."

"That's not what I asked," he toyed, a small smile on his face as he rolled his hand around his reddened cockhead, smearing his shaft with precum to keep pumping slowly.

"I miss your cock. I need you inside me, need you to fuck me," you blurted out uncontrollably.

Joshua swallowed back a moan upon hearing you talk like that. And you got a taste of what he felt whenever you moaned in his ear when a low, raspy hum poured into your ear and your inner thighs clenched instantly.

"Close your eyes and push the dildo further, turn up the speed for me," you responded with a loud moan when you did. "Just let yourself go. Imagine it's me, can you do that, baby?"

"God, Josh," you moaned as your inner thighs started to shake slightly. You tried to imagine him, inside you instead of the vibrator, and its mechanical thrusting.

"I'm here, sweetheart," he murmured with a low raspy voice that only made your walls throb desperately. "God, I miss your needy pussy too. Always so wet and tight for me, sucking my cock back in. So fucking good, baby."

At that, you felt your walls flutter around the vibrator. Joshua knew how much you loved hearing him talk like that, his honeyed, worn voice pouring into your ear, making your body burn in pure delight. You could only give him a mewling sound in response.

"Yeah, I like hearing that," he said with a low rasp.

"Mmnf–fuck. Josh, I need more," you blurted impatiently when you were just at the edge, but needed more friction in your clit, needed to feel stuffed full. "Can I, babe?"

A pause.

"What did you just call me, baby?" he asked, his voice taut and almost breaking at the end. His lips raised in a smirk and pressed the phone to his ear to listen to your ragged breathing.

"Babe," you sighed a moan, no longer able to contain yourself, your legs twitching involuntarily.

"Fuck," Joshua blurted out in a mere a whisper. His mind reeled with an ecstatic shudder when he realized how much he loved hearing you call him that.

You could've smiled at that if it weren't for the desperate need for release. "Please I need more," you pressed. "Ca-can I go faster?"

"Mmn," a long hum, raw and almost inaudible. His hand gripped his cock tighter, now pumping himself faster. "Yeah, bunny. Go all the way in. Go faster too."

You pushed the dildo inside you with a blissful sigh. "Thank you, babe," you moaned and switched the speed to the one that would get you to come. "God, I need you, Josh."

"Yeah, baby?" he grunted slightly and then he sighed out when he felt his chest cave in. "I need you too. I miss your body and your warmth..."

Your mind had gone blank the minute the rabbit ears of the dildo started rubbing your clit, at the same time that the shaft increased the speed of the steady thrusts.

"Josh, I'm close, baby," you whimpered, lifting your hips from the bed slightly, rolling them as your orgasm drew nearer.

"God," Joshua gasped and swallowed back a moan. "I know you want me to talk dirty right now, baby, but I really fucking miss you."

"I miss you too, Josh," you squeezed your eyes shut, your jaw going slack as your sweet high took over your body, making you moan loudly.

"Fuck, fuck. I'm close too," he breathed, his fist pumping on his cock faster. "Keep doing that, baby. I need to hear you."

"Mmn, Josh," you whimpered lewdly, arching your back on the bed, letting the fiery pleasure consume you at last, crying out in pleasure, walls clenching erratically around the rabbit dildo.

"Joshua," you sobbed. "Baby, I love you."

An ecstatic feeling flooded inside him. A raspy moan coiled in Joshua's throat and he screwed his eyes shut, letting a shaky exhale out as his orgasm spilled all over his hand and abdomen, slowly pumping himself until the last spurts of cum came out of him.

"I love you too, bunny," he replied with a shy murmur.

You turned off the vibrator letting the gentle aftershocks of your orgasm run through your body. "Did you come because I told you that I love you, Josh?" you realized.

"Yeah," he replied and groaned slightly upon hearing your adorable laugh. "Don't laugh at me."

"You're cute," you cooed and then you mimicked him, almost getting his honeyed tone to a point: "Do you like hearing me say that, baby?"

"Of course I do, bunny," he replied with a hint of feigned annoyance. "I think I won't ever get tired of hearing you say it."

"Ever?" you asked, pressing your ear to the phone to hear him sigh and you just knew he was smiling.

"Yeah, I know it sounds cheesy but, I really like when you talk sweet to me," he said with a shy, breathy chuckle.

"Mm, I'll do it more often," you grinned. "You might get sick of me."

"I promise you, I won't," he asserted. "D'you feel better now, baby?"

"Yeah," you exhaled, a gloomy feeling falling upon you. "But I'm sad you're not here to care for me afterwards."

Joshua gave you a disgruntled sound. "I know, I know. But I still need you to do what we normally would do together, okay?" he asked softly and your gut twisted over imagining his eyebrows knitting.

"Mmn, but you're not here to cuddle me," you reproached some more.

"Baby," he pressed firmly.

"Okay, okay," you conceded.

"How about this: we go wash and I'll call you again?" he offered with a softer tone now.

"Mmh yeah, I'd like that," you murmured. And with that, you went and washed your hands thoroughly, and cleaned the vibrator, neatly placing it back to where you kept it.

Afterwards, Joshua videocalled you. And as you talked, you started to feel better, as if the nostalgic feeling was a mere afterthought now. Joshua talked about the city he was in, the hotel room he was staying in and the excitement he felt about his upcoming show.

You have no recollection of when you fell asleep, only that you woke up the following day with a message from Joshua that read: "You've fallen asleep, baby… I hope you don't mind if I keep an eye on you for a few minutes. Before I go to sleep. I love you, bunny."

Attached to that message, was a screenshot of you peacefully asleep, the angle twisted to what you assumed was your hand relaxing around your phone. But your face was in the frame, half buried in the pillow, mouth parted a little. And in the corner, the screenshot showed Joshua's face, smiling fondly at the sight of you.

Yoon Jeonghan is a light sleeper.

That is one of the things that you learned about your boyfriend's best friend, during the time you've got to spend together. With Joshua being away for touring and recording sessions, Jeonghan has been there. Slowly, he has become a close friend of yours and he was pretty adamant on being friends. He was one of a kind in that, just a really good friend.

The night you learned he was a light sleeper was a fun night. You had been hate-watching a reality show together over wine and picking on a charcuterie board. Jeonghan had been visiting every few days now, either to watch a movie together or to silently piece together a Lego set.

"Mm, they're gonna kick him out next," Jeonghan asserted. His injured leg was propped up on the couch directly in front of him, a relaxed look on his face, probably from the alcohol.

"But he's the sweetest," you cooed, glossy eyed watching the screen.

"Yeah, that's why," he nodded, a bright look on his face.

You arched an eyebrow at him. Jeonghan was smart. And not only the book-smart kind of guy. He was a pretty good judge of character, just like yourself. But the theater director could read people like you could books.

"He's too sweet for this show, they let him play just enough to keep viewers hooked and will drop him to cause a bigger shock," he pointed one lithe finger to the screen with a devilish grin on his face.

You clicked your tongue. "You're a terrible viewer," you quipped, making his drowsy-lidded eyes turn to you. "You're getting ahead of the thing before it happens!"

Jeonghan scoffed. "Wanna bet?"

"No," you replied wearily with a pout and turned away sheepishly. "You've won all the bettings I've struck with you."

You heard him giggle. "You could win this one, come on, bet," he nodded to the TV.

"I think the pretty one will be kicked out next," you mused, a small smile bundling up your wine-warmed cheeks.

"Why?" Jeonghan stretched out the word. "She's the hottest one in this show!"

"Well, just like you said," you began. "She's pretty and is in love, so that's out for a show that wants to see them all bumping meats together."

"Bumping meats?" Jeonghan retorted and laughed.

"You know what I mean!" you whined.

"You're like an old lady sometimes," he cackled, bringing his vape pen between his lips and dragging in a puff, letting the smoke cascade out of his mouth.

"Stop smoking in my apartment, Yoon Jeonghan!" you squealed.

"Make me," he chuckled and dragged in another breath.

"You–" you cut yourself off before you could think of an insult and grabbed a cushion from the couch to throw it at his face when he laughed even harder at your shy expression.

The cushion hit him square in the face, but it also fell on top of his hand that was holding the wine glass, toppling it over the couch.

"Oop," you uttered, getting the glass before it fell from the seat and onto the floor. But your couch had already suffered all the damage.

"Oh, princess, I'm sorry," Jeonghan cooed immediately upon seeing the red wine stain settling in the seat of your white couch.

"No, no, it's alright," you mumbled, rising from the couch yourself to get a kitchen towel and coming back to press the dry cloth on it. "It's my fault."

You had knelt in front of the couch to press the kitchen towel to stop it from spreading more. Jeonghan was still sitting down, his knee brushed your arm slightly and he moved from it.

"You can bill me for the cleaning service," he assured, looking down as you still did a feeble attempt to do something.

"No, don't worry about it," you shook your head, the movement making you feel dizzy. "I won't let you."

Jeonghan's lips stretched into a smile slowly. "I don't care what you do, let me take care of it."

You narrowed your eyes at him. Jeonghan stared you down as well, pushing his black hair from the side of his face and tucking it behind his ear.

What broke your stare-down contest was the loud buzzing of your phone that had been long forgotten on the coffee table. You jolted slightly and turned from the man hovering above you and picked up the call.

"Hi, Josh," you cooed, eyeing your friend whose smile just got bigger.

"Baby, I'm facetiming you. Stop pressing the phone to your ear," Joshua laughed.

"Oh," you pulled the phone away and the man beside you scoffed a laugh. "Sorry."

Your boyfriend was lying back on the high pillows of the hotel room, his hair washed up and looking like he wasn't wearing a shirt.

"Do you have someone over?" Joshua frowned slightly. The videofeed in the corner showed the camera pointed at you, and in the background, you could see the coffee table with the charcuterie board, wine bottles and glasses. And Jeonghan's wallet, keys, phone and his vape pen.

"Jeongjeong is here," you nodded and pointed the phone to your boyfriend's best friend.

Jeonghan pressed two fingers to his forehead and saluted the camera with a small. "'Sup."

"What are you two guys doing?" was the first thing Joshua said, eliciting an alarming feeling that crawled down your neck.

Though his tone was simple and unsuspecting of anything, you felt nervous nonetheless. Joshua was quite the possessive boyfriend, but since he went away and you had been getting to know his best friend, he has never said anything negative about it.

"We're hate-watching this show," you started.

"We're in the middle of settling a bet!" Jeonghan interjected, making you chuckle out a drunk laugh.

"Are you drunk, sweetheart?" Joshua caught on immediately after that.

"A bit," you murmured, squinting with one eye and bringing up a hand to pinch two fingers in the air. Joshua smiled when you got to your feet and sat beside Jeonghan, on the side that wasn't spilled with wine. Now your video feed on the corner of your phone screen showed you and Jeonghan.

"What's your bet about now?" Joshua asked, watching you with an amused expression on his face.

"Jeonghan is just taking advantage of my poor financing skills," you slurred.

Jeonghan smirked and your boyfriend did too almost as if on cue.

"Don't let him win, baby," your boyfriend advised, but the tone he used with you made you discreetly tuck your lower lip behind your teeth.

"I'm gonna win again. Until you learn," the man beside you shrugged, brushing his shoulder against yours in the process.

Joshua rolled his eyes with a huff. You watched Jeonghan and back to the screen, feeling like you just missed out on the joke.

"Le-learn what?" you babbled.

"I always win," Jeonghan said with ease, making your boyfriend groan.

You gaped at him. "You're cocky," you rolled your eyes and shook your head at him. "Anyway, how are you, Josh?"

This was sort of a new tradition between you and your boyfriend now, he would facetime you and talk about your day, share thoughts and talk like this for at least an hour.

Joshua sucked in a breath slowly. "Tired," he exhaled. "It was a long session today," he said, his honeyed voice sounding worn.

You pouted slightly. Joshua had been recording with Midnight Haze for their first produced album. Every city they hit, they rent a studio and get to recording so they have to use their hours to finish recording their songs fast.

"Take care of yourself, Josh," you cooed, not caring to be openly affectionate with Jeonghan beside you.

"I'm alright, princess. I'm off to bed," he sighed tiredly but with a content look on his face. "You two continue to have fun, okay?"

"M'kay," you mumbled a bit deflated, you hated the days you couldn't get more time talking to him.

"But not too much fun," your boyfriend's mouth turned into a cheeky grin, the pierced eyebrow quirking up. "Not without me."

Jeonghan leaned on your shoulder, taking most of the frame of the camera. "Bye Joshuji," he chanted and waved with his hand.

"Take care," your boyfriend said, although in your state you understood it as don't drink more than you can handle, and nodded.

"Love you, Josh," you said with all the emotion you could muster without making your friend uncomfortable.

"I love you too, baby," he muttered warmly.

The video feed went out and you were met with your reflection on the screen, your eyes beginning to brim with tears as you tossed your phone on the coffee table.

"What?" Jeonghan blurted at that moment and you sniffed, so he went on: "What, what's going on? Why are you crying?"

You knew your tears were part from all the alcohol overpowering your emotions but you were suddenly overcome with a heart wrenching sadness, and worry.

"Oh no, not again," Jeonghan muttered and clicked his tongue. "Come here," he cooed warmly and wrapped an arm around your shoulders to pull you into a cozy embrace.

"I'm sorry," you stuttered between tears, sniffing loudly. "I just–,"

"I know, you don't need to say it," he muttered with a warm tone. "You miss him, you're getting second thoughts."

"I'm not having second thoughts," you frowned and looked at his eyes, drowsy over the alcohol.

"Really?" he pushed his eyebrows up and gave you a tipsy smile. "Really?"

You sent him a confused look. "I–, I've never said that–"

"You don't have to," he muttered. "I've listened to you and all I hear is you guiltripping yourself and then going on a fucking rabbit hole about not 'being good enough' and not telling him how you feel sooner and, honestly it's just–," he sighed.

Your eyebrows knitted involuntarily. "That's how I sound?"

"Yeah, kinda," he tilted his head side to side. "Listen, I know why you feel like this and I hear you but, I think you're more upset by not seeing him as frequently as you used to. Like a baby who just lost their favorite toy."

You laughed through your tears and Jeonghan responded with a sweet smile of his own. "That's mean, Jeongjeong," you muttered, reaching out for your glass of wine and the bottle, pouring a tiny bit more for you to sip.

"It's just how I see it," he gave you a tight squeeze with his arm before releasing you. "Would you feel better if you go and meet up with him?"

"Yeah, I know I would," you said, leaning your head back on the headrest and looking at the ceiling. "But we're not seeing each other for a couple of weeks. And he will not be able to make it to the book release party, so."

Jeonghan leaned his head back the same as you. You turned to see him, he was frowning slightly, his eyes out of focus. "What if I told you that I just got tickets for his show next Saturday?"

You snorted loudly, nearly choking on your saliva, an act fueled by alcohol. "What?"

"And I can also get you there without Joshua knowing, so it could be a surprise. Then you can talk to him about what's bothering you, " he shrugged and gave you a look. "Maybe even convince him to clear his schedule so he can be here."

"You're being oddly nice," you pointed, narrowing your eyes at him.

"Yeah, well don't get used to it," Jeonghan warned and then let out a sigh through a shy smile.

You sighed, looking at the big wine stain on your couch.

Somehow you couldn't bring yourself to care. You gathered your tears with the back of your hand, sniffing involuntarily before saying: "I want a burger," it was a sad declaration.

Jeonghan snorted. "Right now?" he raised his arm, the screen of his smartwatch lighting up from the movement. "It's one in the morning, I doubt we'll find anything open."

"Mm nah, forget it," you brushed off. "I'll get you another glass, hold on."

You slowly gathered your limbs but before you could get up, Jeonghan stopped you with one hand.

"Don't get up," he muttered quickly. "I can't drink more, I have to drive."

"You're leaving already?" you looked at the screen. "But we have to watch the season's finale."

Jeonghan directed his eyes at you. "Then I'll just drink from your glass, just don't get up. We can't both be disabled at the same time."

"I'm not that drunk," you slurred.

"Pfft, yeah right," he smiled and nodded at the flatscreen. "Let's keep watching."

You don't know how or when you fell asleep. You woke up disoriented, your head had fallen languidly from Jeonghan's shoulder, the abrupt awakening made your heart race and your mind reel with some lucidity.

Did you fall asleep on Jeonghan's shoulder?

He had fallen asleep too, his head leaning on the headrest, the features of his face were relaxed, his eyelids trembling slightly as he snored softly.

The screen was frozen, the faint buzzing sound from its electricity made you look for the remote and turn it off. You left the remote on the coffee table, your fingers bumped slightly with the empty glass of wine.

With that, Jeonghan woke up with a start. "Wha–what?" he mumbled sleepily, his arms stretching out into the air.

"We fell asleep," you mumbled, noticing in your speech how drunk you were still.

"Fuck, we did," he groaned, reaching for his phone on the coffee table.

"You can crash here," you offered. "I can bring you blankets and a decent pillow if you want."

Jeonghan raised his wrist once again, noting that it was already three in the morning. "I appreciate that," he lifted his eyes to look at you. "Thank you."

"Don't mention it," you replied with a shy smile.

Some days later, you flew out to surprise your boyfriend in a foreign country. You realized that it wouldn't take much to convince your boyfriend that you were deep in work and totally not about to take a plane. And the reason why it was easy was because you barely talked anymore, since Joshua was kept busy with his own work.

The ticket that Jeonghan had gotten was for a VIP section, up in the wings on one side close to the stage. There was an ominous buzz coming from the people gathering below, waiting for the lights to go out, waiting for the show to begin.

The excitement that coursed through your entire body when you saw Joshua approach the stage and step under the lights was unparalleled. He looked almost ethereal to you.

The orange glow coming from the overhead light made Joshua's frame look warmer and darker, for some reason. The shadows painted on his face almost gave him a melancholic appearance. His eyes remained closed, and his eyebrows knitted in deep focus as he started singing, his sweet and breathy tone taking over the entire venue.

The very few times you've gotten the opportunity to see him perform live, it has been up close. So now that you were some distance from him, you were overwhelmed by a nostalgic feeling, even if he was there, standing under a spotlight.

Slowly as he strummed the first chords of the opening song, the bass and drums joined in with a splashing crescendo, the whole stage became alight in yellow and purple hues and the crowd lauded in cheers and applause.

The song picked up some pacing and the sound of strenuous metal filled your ears, it banged through your body and took over you with a joyous sway. And it seemed that Joshua was taken over by the same urge to move his body to the happy and faster beat of the song.

Joshua looked elated by the time the first song ended. He smiled and gripped the microphone with one hand, eyes running over the crowd as he lifted the other hand, greeting the crowd by the name of its city.

"This is our first time here and we're excited to be opening for Crimson Moon," Joshua sighed with a pleased grin as the crowd went crazy again and waited until it died down again to say: "We're Midnight Haze and this next song is called Reverie."

Joshua turned to see the drummer's signal. Jihoon nodded at him and started playing right away. Then you watched the rest of Midnight Haze's opening show, you saw the lead singer dance with his guitar and frown while singing until the veins on his neck popped up slightly.

Midnight Haze took a minute before starting to play their last song, Joshua bent over to grab a bottle of water and looked at the sea of people as he gulped slowly and then lowered the bottle. His big brown eyes lifted up to the second level stopping cold when they zeroed on you.

Joshua's gaze softened and his shoulders went slack, he wasn't anticipating you there and it showed in his reaction. Your whole body went alight with exhilaration, making you raise your hand and wave at him, "Hi, baby," you mouthed.

The smile he gave you took over the beautiful features of his face, it was so bright that it seemed to quiet down the low murmur of the crowd. It made your whole world stop.

It was quick: he pressed the tips of his fingers against his lips and motioned the kiss at you. Then he was back on business, grabbing his guitar and a pick from the mic stand.

"This next song is our last, it's called Lights Out."

The song was quick paced and happy. It was one of your favorites because it seemed that every time you listened to its beat, it put you into a chipper mood. It ended with a bang, leaving the crowd ready for the main show.

It seemed that Joshua was eager to finish with his presence onstage and get off, because he just simply came forward, waving to the crowd with a cheerful: "We were Midnight Haze, have an incredible night!" and took the strap of his guitar off his shoulder, and walked out the stage with his bandmates following behind.

You wondered what would happen next. Should you wait until the main show is over to look for him? He must be busy after the show.

The following minutes went by achingly slow. You checked your phone to no avail—thinking that Joshua might reach out to you and tell you what to do next but as the white lights were still on, illuminating the whole venue, you looked, searched for his face,

You checked your phone again, biting your lower lip unsure of what to type, what would be the first thing you would say to him upon seeing him for the first time in days?

So you were beginning to type: where are you, on your phone, pressing send and hoping to see him replying. You waited, tapping the screen with the tip of your finger as if that were going to help change the offline status under your boyfriend's name.

You winced in alarm when two large hands slid onto your waist from behind you, and before you could turn to see, you instantly recognized your boyfriend's touch.

"Hi, baby," he muttered in your ear with a raspy voice. His arms encircled you, pressing you against his tall frame and he buried his face in your shoulder.

"Hi, handsome," you replied warmly.

The crowd cheered and went crazy the moment the stage lights went out, signaling that the main show was about to begin. At that moment, Joshua used his hands on you to turn you around, sinking his lips between yours in a hard kiss.

In the darkness, you tried to palm his chest, finding his sweaty face and neck from the performance he just stepped down from. But you still grabbed his face with your hands to press more kisses on his face.

The main show started with a loud whirring of guitars and a booming voice greeted the crowd from below.

"Come with me," Joshua muttered in your ear, grabbing one of your hands from his face and dragging you through the sea of people. He tugged at your hand to keep you close, maneuvering you to walk in front of him as you both went downstairs.

"Where are we going?" you asked innocently as he pointed you to a dimly lit corridor and now he led the way, away from the stage and the crowd.

The vibrations from the loud music muffled your voice, and it appeared that your boyfriend didn't hear you, but he turned all the same, pulling you from your arm and wrapping you in his again. Joshua was happy, the happiest you've ever seen in his eyes as he lifted you from the floor and twirled on his feet.

"Baby, what are you doing here?" he asked, now you were face to face so you heard him clearly. "I thought you were caught up with the book release."

"I wanted to surprise you," you replied with a shy smile.

He put you back on the ground, but was quick to lean down and capture your lips with his own. "When do you go back?" he asked between shallow kisses.

"Why? Do you want me to leave already?" you joked.

"No, no. I just want to know how much time we'll have," he replied, pulling apart and his brow furrowed.

"I leave on Monday," you replied to his question, seeing his expression change slightly. "I didn't lie, I do have a ton of stuff to get ready."

You saw his eyes roam on your face as he appeared to be thinking about something. "Can't you stay a bit longer?" he asked and then shook his head. "Nevermind. You're here."

His hand slid on the side of your face, grabbing you gently before kissing you, his lips moving on yours perfectly. You moaned when his tongue caressed your lower lip, turning the kiss into one that denoted his need to make you feel how much he missed you.

Joshua took your hand, motioning you to the end of the corridor where a large double door stood with security bodies. You both crossed it and then you were in a large waiting room.

You immediately spotted the other two members of Midnight Haze. Jihoon was sitting on one end of a black couch, and he was speaking with someone beside him, a man who you didn't recognize. Vernon on the other hand, was sitting on a lonely sofa, phone in hand and red cup in the other, scrolling his boredom away.

They were surrounded by small groups of people, seemingly all artists or people in the medium. It seemed like it, at least. When Joshua entered the room, a lot of eyes looked his way, and yours, since he was holding your hand and keeping you close to him.

"Hey, Josh, nice gig," someone said in passing, patting Joshua on the back.

"Thanks, man," Joshua nodded with a polite smile.

Your fingers were laced with his, but you felt like you needed both hands to hold onto his. The room was packed, and you felt tiny amongst the people who stood and stared at you.

You were suddenly hit with the realization that this was something that you would have to get used to. You were Joshua's girlfriend now. The lead singer of the successful band Midnight Haze is slowly rising to fame.

And you weren't sure if you wanted to be caught in the spotlight just yet.

Joshua led you to the end of the room where fewer people gathered, but still, he received a lot of praise as you both made your way over. There was a large table, covered with a black tablecloth and cluttered with snacks of all types.

"Are you hungry?" he asked softly, leaning closer so he would have the chance to talk to you in a sweet tone.

You shook your head silently, looking around to make sure no one kept their watchful eyes on your boyfriend.

He seemed not to notice this. "How did you get here?" he said and then his eyes widened. "Jeonghan. Did he do this?"

"Yeah," you shrugged. "Said he wanted us to have a moment together."

Joshua's brow furrowed in thought for a moment, but then he decided not to expand on that by saying: "I have to stay here for a couple of more minutes and then we can go to the hotel if you want to rest."

You tilted your head to one side, looking at his face. "I just want to be with you, handsome," you mumbled, but it came out like a sweet purr.

Joshua smiled, it was an instant reaction, as if his face didn't know what else to do. "Baby, are you flirting with me right now?"

You nodded shyly, tucking your lower lip between your teeth to avoid smiling.

"In front of all these people?" he muttered, his dark eyes glinting with amusement.

"So what if I am?" you blinked, trying with all your might to keep that composure. "What are you going to do?"

He closed his eyes with a smile, it was a brief gesture but you knew that he was enjoying this. But he kissed your forehead, pressing his lips fully to your skin, making you tilt your head back slightly.

"Behave," he muttered quietly. "I have to talk to some people we're recording with tomorrow and then we leave, okay?"

You smiled complacently and nodded. "Okay, baby," you replied with a sweet tone.

His hand cupped the back of your head and you reached out for his kiss. "Fuck," he whispered into your lips and a smile painted his face, rolling his eyes before he added: "Don't make this harder for me, bunny."

You chuckled and gave your seductive act up. "Fine."

Joshua nodded to the people behind you. "Come. You won't have to say anything, just don't leave my side, okay?"

You quickly understood and grabbed his hand again, which he took proudly as he got close to some guys. Joshua was quick to strike up friendly conversation with them, and you knew that they were some big producers that specialized in a very specific sound that Midnight Haze was interested in.

As the conversation shifted into a language that you couldn't follow anymore, your mind started to drift and with it, your gaze wandered around the room.

That's how you caught sight of her.

The first thing you noticed was her piercing gaze pointed in your direction. She tried to conceal her looking over the moment you spotted her, and she did this by pretending to be looking at her phone screen.

You thought nothing of it at first, a lot of people tend to stare at Joshua. He finds it easy to catch the attention of the people around almost unwillingly, most of it due to his very presence and crushing beauty.

But the second time you looked, and found her staring again, you weren't so sure she was just starstruck. The hair on your nape prickled, and you felt your face contort into a frown but you looked away.

"Nice, I'll let my guys know," you heard Joshua say. "Thank you."

He turned to you and exhaled. "That went well, didn't it?"

You nodded robotically.

"You weren't paying attention, right bunny?" he smiled endearingly at you, grazing your cheek with the back of his finger. "We can go now."

"Joshie, is that you?"

You turned over your shoulder to find the girl approaching you and your boyfriend, a bright smile on her pretty face as she stood closer. Now that you could see her clearer, the striking beauty of her face, her high cheekbones and full pink lips that matched the colored contacts on her eyes.

"Thea... hi," he replied slowly.

"I heard you guys were the opening act for the Crimson boys, but wanted to see that for myself," she locked her hands behind her back.

"Yeah, we are," Joshua added and sent you a brief look. "Uh, Thea, this is my girlfriend," he introduced you by name in an awkward manner, almost as if he had forgotten how to handle social encounters completely.

"Oh," she chirped and looked at you. "Hi."

"Hi. Nice to meet you," you smiled through your shyness.

"So, how long are you guys touring for?" she asked, her bright eyes moving up to see Joshua's face.

"We're going for the rest of this tour leg," he pressed his lips in a smile.

Slowly, you gathered that Thea was another singer. You had seen her face before and maybe heard a song or two from her indie rock band.

"That's great!" Thea squealed and you could see that she was being genuine when she added: "I'm happy for you guys."

A fiery wave flooded your tummy when you saw that, but you quickly brushed it away.

"Thanks, Thea."

Her eyes ignored you completely as they roamed on your boyfriend's frame. "I know how hard you worked for this, Joshie. You deserve it."

You slipped your hand out of his grasp quietly, squeezing his arm as if saying, 'I'll leave you guys to talk,' and went to the snack bar to grab a bottle of water. And to get away from the jealousy eating you from the inside.

You didn't register what happened next, and you made an effort to not look over. The heat on your cheeks from the embarrassment was so bad you stalled at the snack bar for longer than you actually needed.

You sat down on the couch with a small sigh. "Hi, there Vernon," you muttered.

"Hi, there," he replied aloofly and then looked up abruptly: "Oh, hi! What are you doing here? I didn't see you before, when did you get here?"

"I watched you open," you explained with a small smile. "It was good, you guys seem to know what you're doing."

Vernon squinted as he smiled at you. "Yeah, we're good actors, so it seems," he joked too.

Before you could handle yourself, your eyes were darting across the room. Joshua was still talking to Thea, an awkward look on his face as he smiled and nodded again, his eyes drifting towards you.

"Ah, don't worry about that," Vernon told you, probably reading the very evident confusion on your face. His sweet brown eyes were inconspicuously looking over at the scene you just ran away from and then he looked back at you.

"I'm not worried," you were quick to put in a smile. "I'm just not big on socializing, that's all."

"Yeah, I get that," he drew in a breath and nodded. "I get your case I mean. It gets tiring."

"Why are you still here? Don't you prefer to be resting back at the hotel?" you inquired, arching an eyebrow.

"The other guys want to go grab some drinks after the show is over," he shrugged. "I don't want to pass that up."

You nodded slowly, pretending to drink from your water bottle to dart another look. You were feeling more controlled now that you had taken a step back from the situation.

Your phone buzzed in your hand, making you look at the screen.

[10:29 PM] Jeongjeong: how did it go? 👀

That drew a smile on your face nearly instantly, you could imagine the curious look on his face as he typed.

[10:29 PM] you: it's going great. [10:29 PM] Jeongjeong: oof. [10:29 PM] Jeongjeong: do tell [10:29 PM] you: I'm sitting in the waiting room while he's talking to someone right now. [10:29 PM] Jeongjeong: this mf 🙄 i'm calling rn you hold on.

You answered his call upon the first ring.

"Yes?"

"Oh, grandma, it's so nice to hear you," Jeonghan cooed and then laughed.

"Shut up," you hissed, rolling your eyes.

"Get off your ass and walk out, pretend you can't hear me," he instructed.

You paused. "What, why?" you mumbled and darted a look to your boyfriend, who was still deep in conversation with his friend.

"Just do it, grandma," he scoffed and then gave you a deep chuckle.

"Okay, okay," you conceded, getting up from the black couch and walking towards the door you came from. You laughed at yourself when you even put up the act of being unable to hear the other end of the call, by covering your other ear.

"Are you out of his sight yet?" he asked.

"Yeah, I'm in a hallway now," you frowned when a realization dawned on you: "You are a bad influence."

"And you are a pain in my ass. Surprising your stupid boyfriend cost me money, I'm not letting it go to waste," he retorted immediately. "Was he talking to a girl?"

"How did you know?"

"You wouldn't be upset otherwise," he replied with ease. "Now, let's just wait until he takes the bait."

"And then what?" you asked, looking back to the door, to see that it was clear.

"Um, I dunno, lie," you could almost picture him shrugging off.

"I can't just lie to him, Jeonghan," you muttered.

"Well, tell him it was me," he said reluctantly. "Just don't tell him why I called."

"That's called lying by omission," you quipped with a tone of obviousness.

"I know, Einstein," he huffed. "Who do you think you're talking to?"

"The biggest asshole I know."

"Huh," he chuckled. "If you weren't my best friend's girl I'd think you're flirting with me right now."

"Can't you come up with a more original response?" you quipped back. "I know you're trying to keep me talking, Han, but that's not going to work."

"Well, you're not helping either. You're awful at pretending," Jeonghan said calmly.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Is Shua there yet?"

"Answer my question!" you demanded.

"Baby? What's going on?" Joshua called from the other end of the hallway, your stomach dropped and you turned to see your boyfriend approaching you, a worried frown on his face.

"Okay, mission accomplished. Say bye to me and hang up," he directed quietly.

"I gotta go, b-bye," you muttered awkwardly, putting your phone in your back pocket.

Joshua arched his pierced eyebrow. "Everything okay?" he asked, his tone laced with a bit of confusion.

"Yeah, everything is fine," you mumbled with a shrug.

"Who were you talking to?" he asked, his tone coated with ease now and he motioned a hand at you.

You grabbed his hand and started walking beside him back to the waiting room. "Uh, no one," you responded in a faux nonchalant manner.

He stopped abruptly. "Baby," he said firmly, reading your eyes desperately.

"It's nothing, Josh," you gave him an empty smile and to emphasize it, you added a shrug.

Joshua appeared to be pondering over your words for a second. You saw that he still had traces of sweat trickling down the base of his head and onto his neck. You bit down your lower lip.

Your boyfriend straightened when two people passed by, patting him on his shoulder with a, "Nice gig," mentioned. He nodded and pressed his lips in a smile.

"Okay, let's go," he hissed, pulling your hand down the hallway, but turning to a door right before the waiting room. It had a sign that read STOREROOM and pushed the door open, dragging you inside the cramped closet.

It mostly was occupied by guitar cases, mic stands and amp cases. But Joshua found an empty wall where he could corner you, his hands pushing you by the waist until you bumped against the wall.

"Josh," you grabbed one of his wrists when it came up to clench the curve of your waist, his darkened gaze roaming all over your face.

"What's the matter with you, baby?" he asked, a honeyed purr as he leaned closer, the tip of his nose pushing against your own.

"What do you mean?" you breathed anxiously.

Joshua hummed softly as his lips met yours briefly, grazingly. "You walked away from me," he mumbled. "And now you don't want to tell me who you were talking to."

Oh, crap. Should you tell him it was Jeonghan on the phone? His best friend?

"Baby, there's nothing to worry about," you replied, a hand sliding from his shoulder and onto the side of his chest, feeling the buttons of his shirt. "Besides, you were busy talking with your friends. I didn't want to interrupt."

The corner of his mouth raised slightly. "Don't baby me," he growled, pushing your head back by pressing his forehead against yours. "Who were you talking to?"

"No one," you breathed.

"Mmn, right," he purred. "So you were just pretending? To see if I came running, looking for you?"

"Mmmaybe," you cooed, shuddering slightly when you felt his breath caress your lips.

"D'you like to do that?" he gave you a shallow kiss, his lips barely capturing yours.

"Yeah," you mewled, grabbing his face with both hands to kiss him deeply. "I missed you, Josh. Did you miss me?"

"You know I did," he growled, pressing more kisses on your lips. "Like crazy."

"Will you show me, baby?" you mumbled, your voice sounded almost alien to you, a whiny and breathy tone.

"Right here?" he frowned, almost as if he couldn't believe your sudden change in behavior.

"Right here," you nodded.

"Anyone could hear us baby, are you sure?" he inquired, not really looking for an answer, it seemed like he was just taunting you.

"I want this... or do you have something better to do?" you cocked your head to one side looking at him innocently. "Do you still have to tend to your fans?"

Joshua let out a chuckle into your mouth, his hand cupping your cheek as he planted more kisses on your face. "Brat," he whispered before his lips dipped into yours.

Suddenly, your anger and jealousy dissipated, almost as if all you needed were his lips on yours, moving seamlessly, just as all the nights you shared together.

"Are you still on the pill, baby?" he muttered when his hands slid from your waist down to the button of your jeans, undoing it with a sharp tug.

"Yeah," you frowned. "Obviously."

"Mn, why is that obvious?" he inquired, his lips moving to leave a trail of kisses to cheek to the shell of your ear.

"I wanted to be ready for you," you replied in a sing-song pitch.

"Mmn, well that's too bad," his hands dragged your jeans down.

"Why?" you breathed, feeling your brow furrow even deeper.

"I was hoping you weren't," he replied with a smirk. "So I can put a baby in you," he said, just as he kneeled before you.

"Joshua!" you chastised, his smirk turning into a wide cheeky smile.

"Baby," he replied with a small giggle, hooking his fingers on the band of your thong and pulling it down too, so that he could press kisses on your mound, closing his eyes to you before he pulled out his tongue and leave open mouthed kisses on your cunt.

"Mnf," you grabbed the back of his head as he continued to make out with your mound, his hands dragging down your jeans some more, blindly helping you to bring out a leg from your pants.

His tongue slipped between your folds, making a smacking sound with his mouth when he retreated slightly, bringing his pointer and middle finger to part the lips of your pussy to slowly push his tongue against your clit.

You held him by a fistful of dark hair, angling your hips forward so he could have more access with his mouth on your pussy. "Oh, Josh," you moaned with a high pitched tone.

"Do you want me to fuck you right here, baby?" he muttered, lifting his big doe eyes to your own.

Your whole body went ablaze and you instantly nodded without much thought put into it. "Yeah," you breathed out.

Joshua stood up, grabbing your face to angle it for his feathery kisses. "Do you want everyone to know you're mine?"

"Yes," you whispered. "God, yes, Josh."

You automatically searched for his belt, without toying or teasing you loosened it, to then unclasp and unzip his pants. A small chuckle came out of you when you had to untuck the white button up to get to his black boxers.

"I missed you, baby," you mewled, darting a look from the bulge beneath his boxers to his dark eyes.

Joshua let out a soft sigh, his eyes fluttering close when your hand pressed on his clothed hard on. "Missed you too," his voice was barely above a whisper. "You have no idea, bunny."

You pouted at him. "Then why won't you pay attention to me," you whined, your act suddenly broken by a shy smile.

He moved your body on top of a sound amplifier case, the height was just perfect enough for you to sit in, which you did, being forced by his hands searching your thighs to angle you for his body.

"I'm working, baby," he replied shortly, pulling out his hard cock from his briefs, guiding it to your core. "And I told you to wait."

Your hands slid beneath his white button up, gripping his sides tightly as he sank on you in one go. "Umf," you bit down your lip to avoid making more noise.

"Fuck," he whispered, dropping his forehead on yours. "Okay?"

You nodded slightly. "Okay," you breathed, your hands sliding down to his hips to push his boxers down further. "Move, please, Joshua."

He groaned before complying, pushing his hips on you shallowly at first. "God, baby. You're so fucking tight."

You swallowed back a moan, grabbing on his shirt with your fists to search for the buttons blindly, your eyes trained on his.

"Do you want me to put a baby in you, sweetheart?" he asked, not letting go of your sudden confession.

A moan coiled in your throat, making you close your eyes, as his thrusts hit deeply inside you. "Yeah," you mewled, undoing one button at a time. "Want everything with you."

"Mmn," Joshua hummed, pushing his forehead against yours, grazing his lips with yours as he whispered: "Get off the pill."

Your body acted naturally, your legs parting wider for his thrusts, his cock reaching deeper inside you, making you moan lewdly.

"You're not serious," you whispered, parting his white shirt wide to uncover his torso for your view.

"I am," he gasped in your mouth. "I wouldn't joke with this."

"Baby steps, Joshua," you whispered shakily.

"I love you," he responded frantically, grabbing your hips to hold you in place as his thrusts changed in pace, moving faster and deeper against you.

"I love you too," you echoed.

The moan that escaped your mouth reverberated across the small closet, making you gasp and hold onto his shoulders to let him chase his high, his cock ramming inside your walls.

You knew it had to be a quick fuck, so you didn't care if you reached your climax, you were content with the pleasure you got from his cock sliding in and out of you, the faces he made, the soft gasps that left him as he did so.

You leaned back just a bit, angling your cunt for him to fuck open. A lewd whimper bubbled in your chest when he hit a glorious spot inside you, making the features of his face scrunch to muffle a moan.

"Shh," he hissed. "Quiet, baby."

You nodded aloofly, your hands pushing the white button up from his shoulders to uncover more of his beautiful skin to ruin. You first attached your mouth to his, giving him a hungry kiss before dipping your head down on the crook of his neck.

"Fuck," he whispered when you suckled on the sensitive spot of his neck, moving your mouth with a trail of open kisses until you reached his throat.

You sucked on his skin at the base of his throat, delighting on the careless moans that started to leave his mouth now. He didn't relent on the movement of his hips, fucking you with the same deep and controlled pace.

You gritted your teeth, muffling a whimper when the tip of his cock reached a point that made your muscles tighten in response as pleasure took over your body.

"Josh," you mewled, trying to hold onto him, to hold onto reality but your mind was slipping into nothingness, all focus was now on his cock ramming inside you with a deliriously good pace.

"Open your mouth," he growled, and nodded when you gave him a confused look. "Come on."

Before you could do what he asked, his hand came up to your face, using two fingers to open your mouth wide for him. You thought that he would just stick his fingers in your mouth to shut you up. But instead, you watched his lips purse slightly as he spat in your mouth, a low whimper bubbling in your chest.

"Shhh," he smiled menacingly. "Swallow."

You swallowed his spit obediently, closing your mouth but his hand was there to force it open again.

"I didn't tell you to close it again," he purred quietly, sticking his fingers between your lips as he continued to push his cock inside your walls. "Misbehave again and I'll just fuck your mouth, bunny."

Your brows furrowed, and you made a pleading sound.

"You don't want that, right?" he nodded at you and smiled when you pulled your tongue for him to land his spit in before saying: "Good girl."

His spit started to drip down your tongue along with your own drool, beginning to slide down your chin.

"Swallow," he instructed with a low tone and you closed your mouth to do so. "You want my cum inside your pretty cunt, don't you baby?"

You moved your head up and down in sharp nods, a low whimpering moan coming out of you at the sound of that.

"I'm gonna make you a mommy," he gasped, picking up a pace to his thrusts, hitting you deeper, harder.

"Joshua," you gasped, resting your forehead on his shoulder, his button up hanging languidly on his biceps now. "Yes, Josh, please."

His hand shifted from the curve of your waist to the back of your head, while the other just encircled your body so his arm was wrapped around you firmly.

"Fuck, I'm cumming," he groaned when you started sucking love bites below his collarbones. "Are you gonna take it all? So I can put a baby in you?"

You mewled a sound in confirmation, moving your head to face him. "Yeah," you breathed. "Come inside me, Joshua, please."

He sealed his mouth against yours, his thrusts slowing down, languidly fucking his cum inside you with a muffled moan as he kissed you, passionately, breathing erratically with you.

"I love you, baby," he whispered sweetly once he stopped, breathless.

"I love you too, Joshua," you replied in the same manner.

He smiled lazily, his hand moving from the back of your head to cup your cheek. "Let's go to the hotel room. I want to make you feel good too, baby."

You nodded. "Okay."

"Okay," he replied dazedly, his thumb rubbing back and forth on your cheek.

"Are you going to head out first?" you asked innocently, legs beginning to tremble at his sides.

You felt his brow furrow. "No," he mumbled. "You want me to do that?"

"You don't care if we're seen coming out like this?"

"Baby, they probably heard us fucking just now," he gave you a hollow chuckle.

A shock of emotions coursed through you, caused by the odd fixation you had by him fucking you in public spaces. It felt exciting, almost shameful, and so very lewd.

"This is very rockstar of you," you laughed shakily.

"You think so?" he gasped tiredly, pushing his eyebrows up.

You were suddenly struck with the overwhelming beauty of his face. His big brown eyes as he also seemed to be lost in the features of your own face.

"Yeah," you whispered with a shy smile.

"Do you like it, sweetheart?" he purred, leaning down to press small kisses in your lower lip.

"You know I do," you breathed. "I like it when you take me anywhere you can."

He smiled softly, you felt his lips stretch as he did so. "Mmn, I might've turned you into a little sex monster."

You laughed out loud, the sound making your boyfriend's smile wider and brighter.

"Lean back baby, I'm pulling out."

You pushed your hands on the amp case, leaning back as he pulled his cock out of you. A shudder shook you when you caught a glimpse of his wet shaft as his hand tucked it back into his black briefs and fixed his pants.

"Don't move," he whispered, kneeling again so he could gather your panties and hook them around your ankle, dragging them up.

You lifted your hips slightly, looking at the focus written in his face as he helped you get dressed. You reached out to arrange his white shirt again, smiling deviously when you didn't button all the way up, leaving his chest uncovered.

Joshua smiled too when he noticed that you had purposefully left his chest uncovered for everyone to see the red love bites you had planted in his skin, between his collarbones, on his throat and between his pecs.

"Let's go," he said, extending a hand out to you.

Joshua led you back into the waiting room, only to tell the other guys that he was returning to the hotel and that he was spending the night with you instead of going out to get drinks.

You noticed the looks you got from different faces, the small smiles and hushed noises they made as you walked out of the room hand in hand with Joshua.

There was a certain feeling you got from the looks—you knew that the fact that Joshua had just fucked you in a storeroom caused a mixture of shame and excitedness in you. But there was something more, the rush you felt because the looks meant that they knew what you did.

The original issue for your jealousy was a long distant thought now. It seemed almost amusing that you didn't care anymore about the reason why you felt jealous.

It wasn't until you saw her again. Thea was looking your boyfriend's way, the moment causing you no emotion at all now. You couldn't read what you saw in her eyes, and you found it alarming that you didn't care at all.

But then you felt his cum dripping out of you, pooling in your panties. Embarrassment warmed your face, feeling it strum in your eardrums as you tried to hide your face, your fingers wrapped around his hand tightening in a knowing gesture.

Joshua turned his head and gave you a brief look. "I know," he muttered. "Let's get out of here, baby."

He interlocked his fingers with yours, leading you down the long hallway and turned down a darker one, at the end you saw the EXIT sign lit in red neon light. It felt as if you and Joshua were walking away from the booming music, leaving it behind on the stage and escaping into the night.

"The hotel where I'm staying is just down the street," Joshua said, pointing with his thumb over his shoulder. "Do you mind walking?"

You smiled and started walking the way he pointed you to, pulling on his arm.

"Do you want me to carry this for you?" he asked sweetly, tugging the strap of your pretty tote bag from your shoulder and you allowed him to carry it on his shoulder.

"Thank you baby," you smiled at the look of your boyfriend carrying your bag for you.

"So," he sighed, a tired smile on his face as he looked down to find your face. "Do you want kids?"

A surge of heat flooded your entire body, sizzling underneath your skin. You casted a look at the night sky. "Having kids is something I definitely haven't planned for, honestly," you frowned with some thought. "So honestly, I don't know. Why?"

You found his eyes again, his gaze had softened and he pouted at you cutely as he hummed, also in a thoughtful way. "You seemed a little eager," he shrugged.

As you rolled your eyes, a shy smile twitched at the corners of your lips as you asked: "And you?"

"Yeah, I'd like to. Some day."

You stopped walking for a moment, making him stop. "Baby, you don't think we're going a little too fast?"

The corners of his mouth raised a little. "You don't think we need to talk about this?" he retorted.

"Of course," you blinked, your stomach twisting when you saw the cute smile crowning his mouth.

"Let's get to the room first then," he muttered softly, running the back of his finger across your cheek.

When you got to the hotel, Joshua told you to wait in the nice waiting area arranged in the lobby and you watched him approach the counter, drawing the gaze from the front lady.

Propping an elbow in the counter, he leaned slightly forward, giving the lady a polite smile as he prompted a conversation which you weren't within earshot to catch. But you saw your boyfriend look in your direction, smiling softly at the front desk lady and your stomach sank slightly when the lady smiled at you and then to him.

You watched the interaction from afar, wondering what was the cause for those looks both Joshua and the lady sent you until he nodded, smiling brightly at her and you were witness to the power that smile held, because the woman behind the counter looked speechless for a second.

He pushed himself off the counter, tapping once with his hand and then turned to you, a cheeky grin on his face and then he sat down next to you.

"What was all that?" you asked curiously.

"I had to arrange for a room for us," he muttered close to you and grabbed your hand, interlocking his fingers with yours and placing the laced hands on his lap. "And kind Claire there is going to help us with that. Now we have to wait for a bit, baby."

The woman named Claire seemed to perk up at the sound of Joshua mentioning her name. She smiled politely and resumed working on the monitor in front of her.

You sighed and leaned your head against his shoulder, feeling his warmth and catching the scent of his cologne, the freshness of it, the smell of his skin, all mixed up. It made you feel something deep in your being, like being punched in the gut with the realization that you are way into deep now.

"You're tired baby," Joshua said softly when he heard you sigh and took the hand he was already holding to kiss each of your knuckles. "We shower and then we go to bed, does that sound alright?"

From the corner of your eye you caught the sight of the lady smiling at you and Joshua, it was a somewhat sweet smile, as if endearing.

"Don't we need to talk about something, babe?" you answered, lifting your head to meet his sweet brown eyes.

He blinked, as if pushing the matter away. "It can wait," he muttered, bringing a hand to cup your chin. "We can talk about it tomorrow, if you'd like."

"Mr. and Ms. Hong," a polite male voice called, approaching you from the other end of the lobby. "Your room is ready for you."

"Thank you," Joshua replied, getting up from the couch and tugging your arm softly.

Your stomach twisted upon suspecting what had happened at the front desk and you eyed your boyfriend, curiosity in your eyes which he tried to ease by giving you a gentle squeeze to your hand.

You entered the elevator and stood near Joshua, who was humming to a song as he toyed with the keycard to the room. It was a song you didn't know, and you started guessing that it was what Midnight Haze was working at the moment.

"This might be fancier than I expected," Joshua muttered under his breath when you both reached the floor and walked down the hall to a double door. He checked the keycard again with a question written on his face and slided it on the sensor.

"Joshua, what did you tell the lady?" you inquired when he opened the doors to the recently cleaned hotel room.

"Just the truth," he hummed as he closed the door, he read the disbelief in your gaze and he coughed. "I just told her that you came here to surprise me and I needed a bigger room, and... told her that my beautiful wife needed some rest after her long flight, that's all."

Your entire body beamed with ecstasy and adoration. It seemed endearing to you the way Joshua used the word wife to refer to you. He loved it, almost as if it were real.

The room was large, the first thing you saw on entering was the small round table, surrounded by a couple of chairs, followed by a living room, a fake fireplace wall served as a divider to the bedroom, where you could catch a glimpse of the large king-size bed.

The living room was framed by large floor-to-ceiling windows, the curtains were drawn and you could see that there was a balcony overlooking the city skyline.

"I have to go down to get my suitcases and I'll be back," Joshua informed you and left after you nodded in confirmation. You took this time to hop in the shower, the warm water washing the alertness from you and when you came out, you were feeling ready for bed.

You wrapped your body in one of the bathrobes and walked out of the bathroom. The bed looked so inviting that you couldn't resist but to lie in it, curling yourself into a ball and you fought it at first but sleep took you in quickly.

That was until you felt a pair of strong arms lifting you gently and tucking you underneath the heavy covers. Joshua's hard and warm body huddled with yours from behind, burying his nose in your hair to breathe in slowly.

"I missed you so much," he whispered. You realized, as you came out of your slumber that he said this thinking you wouldn't hear.

But you grabbed his hand, squeezing it softly before you turned to face him. "I missed you too," you muttered sweetly at him.

"Did I wake you up?" he whispered, pushing your hair from your face with his hand. "Sorry."

"Don't worry about it," you breathed, bringing a hand to his nape, feeling his long hair, wet from the shower he just took. Joshua blinked slowly, keeping his eyes focused on your face. "Come here."

You used the hand that was already on his nape to bring him for your lips slipping between his as he reciprocated the slow, tender kiss. He moaned in your mouth when your tongue lapped on his lower lip.

Next thing you knew, he was pushing you on your back, pinning you against the soft mattress with his semi-naked body. Your hands immediately attached to his sides, feeling the hard muscles of his lats tense up under your touch.

The kiss deepened, urgency setting in, and now you were the one moaning when his lips littered your jawline with kisses and down your throat. Wide awake now, you felt his fingers search for the knot of your robe, tugging at it lose for him to have access to your naked body.

"Baby," he growled in your mouth, when your fingers hooked in the band of his boxers, the tip of his nose nudged against yours, his hot breath caressing your lips.

"Take me, Joshua," you mewled, pushing the black stretchy fabric down to find his cock with your hand, gently pumping him as you felt it harden on your grasp.

"Let me make love to you, baby," he whispered softly, pinching your chin with his thumb and pointer finger. You nodded and his lips stretched into a smile.

The rest of the night was something you only thought possible within your dreams. Joshua kept his body pressed on yours as he made love to you, rolling his hips slowly against yours, kissing you until he had to gasp for air, his touch so gentle you swallowed back sobs.

His face contorted slightly when he saw your eyelashes wet in tears, but he kept repeating, over and over, that he loved you. He wanted to be yours forever, he wanted you as his wife—he didn't care how soon it was for him to say it.

You fell asleep afterwards, your body laced with his, subconsciously looking for him if either of you drifted apart on the bed. You could feel soft kisses pressed on your shoulder and on your hair. Almost as if even in his sleep he couldn't keep his hands and lips to himself.

The next morning, you woke up to Joshua planting a kiss on your forehead, then the smell of his fresh cologne dragged you out of slumber in a second. "Where are you going?" you muttered.

Joshua was just walking to the door when he heard your voice. "I have a recording session today," he sat down on the bed, grabbing your hand to kiss your knuckles. "We can do something tonight. Go on a date. Would you like that, baby?"

"Yeah," you whispered, still drowsy from the long night. "I'd love that."

Joshua smiled fondly at you, leaning close to you and left a feathery kiss on your lips. "A date it is, then," he whispered before getting up and leaving the room.

So instead of going out on a date, you arranged with the hotel staff to bring a tablecloth, cutlery and wine glasses, and went out to buy candles and a bottle of wine. You set the table with candles and checked the hotel menu for something to order.

But time passed and you waited, sitting all pretty in a dressing gown, hiding the set you had bought for the occasion; which had to be changed into a large T-shirt of Joshua's when he failed to come back at the time he said he would. No phone call, no text to explain himself.

You drank a glass of wine alone and felt miserable again. Blowing out the candles, you went to lie on the big bed and decided to go to sleep. That was until you heard the faint beeping of the door, followed by noises from the living room that made you jump out of bed.

The faux marble tiles were freezing cold under your bare feet as you made your way to the small living room. You had been woken up from a very light sleep in the middle of the night when you heard the soft beeping of the door to your hotel room.

The lonely lamp in one corner of the room had been turned on, so now the room was provided by a soft orange glow on the man sprawled on the black sofa, his legs spread wide apart.

Your boyfriend had his head tilted back, an arm on the headrest, the other over his torso, between his legs there was a short glass of whiskey held by his long fingers. He didn't notice you coming in, and you assumed that he was so tired that he might be falling asleep already.

Walking silently up to him and once you were standing between his knees, you noticed his eyes were open and he was staring mindlessly at the ceiling.

"Hi, baby," he croaked with a low raspy voice as he leaned forward to take a generous gulp of whiskey and set it aside on the coffee table.

"You could've called," you reproached not a second later.

You heard him sigh. "I know. I'm sorry, bunny," he replied, avoiding your eyes. But then a sigh bubbled in his chest when he caught sight of the half empty wine bottle on the small round table, and the lonely glass of wine beside it.

"You're not invited for my next late night dinner," you told him, driving his gaze from the wasted candles on the table to your eyes, you pouted cutely at him, letting him know that you were joking.

"Baby, I'm sorry," he blinked and looking up to lock eyes with you made his look bigger, glinting on the glow of the lamp.

Then he grabbed your hand that was dangling at your side and took it to his lips, kissing your knuckles lightly.

Now that he was looking at you, taking your whole frame in, he noticed you sported one of his clean t-shirts. It didn't fit you properly, obviously, since it was a few sizes too big even for his own body. So the length covered up to your mid thigh and the sleeves reached your elbows.

"Were you sleeping before I got here, sweetheart?" he inquired with a soft tone.

"I was snoozing for a bit. Waiting for you, actually," you muttered back just as he tugged the hand he was still holding, pulling you forward.

You understood what he wanted, so you pressed one knee on the couch just beside him, and then the other to sit on top of him on his lap. His hands circled your waist, giving you a firm squeeze.

"Please forgive me, baby," he insisted for a third time.

The dim lighting of the hotel suite let you appreciate the beautiful features of his face, his big brown eyes, his plump lips, the eyebrows that knitted ever so slightly when you didn't come up with a response.

"I know work is important, babe," you replied slowly. "But at least let me know when our plans change. Deal? Texting me takes you twenty seconds."

You said this while one of your hands started brushing his soft dark hair away from his eyes. You did this almost absentmindedly, as if your hands had a mind on its own. Joshua blinked a few times, but his eyes didn't deter away from your face.

You could tell that he loved it when you reprimanded him like this, the seriousness you would take, but still delivering your sentences with a gentle tone.

"I forgive you. But next time I won't be too forgiving," you told him, smiling playfully.

"Thank you, baby," he smiled too. But it was a small smile, trying to mask the tiredness on his eyes.

But before you could say something more, your boyfriend pressed his lips against yours. Softly at first, almost apologetically. As if trying to test you for any pause or reluctance before his lips dipped between yours.

You tasted the whisky on his tongue once it slipped inside your mouth, his hands flatly placed on your thighs, his fingers digging on your skin.

The black and white plaid shirt he wore felt soft under your skin as you slid your forearms over his shoulders to lace your hands behind his nape.

The rough pads of his fingers grazed your thighs then he moved his hands to your lower back, pushing you forward to make you sit on him fully.

"Josh," you whispered with an unspoken question lingering in your lips, pulling apart from his face to take a good look at him.

The tiredness lingered in the features of his face, but the glint on his eye had taken a darkness to it, a certain hunger you knew too well about him.

"I like how you look with my stuff on," he muttered, it sounded like a breathy growl, almost like the way he sounded in the mornings when he woke up.

"Mm, yeah?" you whispered, tilting your head to one side as your fingers started toying with the hair on the back of his head. "Would you like to see me without it?"

His tongue pushed on his lower lip slowly as he nodded with his head. "Yeah," his voice was now below a murmur. "I'd love that, baby."

You smiled at the sound of that. His hands grabbed the baggy t-shirt on his fists and lifted it up as you also raised your arms for him to take it off you and threw it on the side, leaving you with your boyshort panties only.

"Mm," he hummed happily as he dipped his head to kiss you, a hand sliding on the side of your neck while the other traveled from your thigh to the small of your back.

Then your fingers moved to get the buttons of his plaid shirt, undoing each quite hastily.

"Slow down, baby," he growled into your mouth.

"No," you mumbled back.

"Why are you rushing? We have all night."

"You stood me up," you sulked slightly, even if you had forgiven him, you wouldn't let him off the hook just yet. "Let me have this."

That made Joshua smile, letting you have your fun undoing the buttons of his black and white plaid shirt, which was not buttoned all the way to the neck, only halfway because he wore a black long-sleeve underneath.

Once the shirt was off his shoulders, your hands cupped his face fully, palms pressed to his cheeks as you kissed him with hunger. A small laugh was muffled in your mouth when your hands moved onto his black t-shirt, probably laughing at your impatience.

"You're so hot," you breathed, not caring how needy you sounded. A sigh left your lips, running your hands over his lean chest, over the angry red hickeys you made the night prior in the middle of the storeroom quickie.

His hand captured your chin, caressing your soft skin with his calloused fingertips. The sensation made you shudder a bit.

"C'mere," he motioned you over to kiss you fervently, making you moan in his mouth when his hands roamed all over your body and stopping to cup your butt, pushing you slowly so you could grind on his crotch.

You held onto the headrest with your hands just before you could push your clothed pussy on the growing bulge in his jeans, moving your hips so that your clit was angled to the rough fabric of his clothing.

With a soft moan that landed on his lips, you sneaked a look down his body, his naked torso, the hickeys on his chest, the messy look on his hair, the lust-lidded eyes when you looked back at his face.

"Bunny," he muttered in your mouth, patting the side of your thigh softly. "Get up."

Before you could stop yourself, you obeyed all too willfully, removing yourself from his lap. His hands were immediately working on removing your panties, sliding them down your legs and you stepped out of them when they fell to your ankles.

His hands were seizing you by your hips just when you started to move onto his lap again. "Stay still, baby," he instructed, leaning his head to litter kisses across your tummy.

"Josh. No teasing," you urged when you felt his tongue brush on the spot below your belly button, your hands cupped the back of his head, following his trail down to your mound.

"Shh, don't get bratty now," he said, his voice honeying over the warning.

"Bratty?" you repeated, trying not to squirm on his grasp when his lips kissed the lowest point of your mound, your sensitive skin reacting with his delicate touch.

"You heard that right," he bit back softly against your skin.

"You stood me up," you whined, your fingers curling on his soft black hair when you felt his teeth grazing your sensitive skin. "I'm not being bratty," you put emphasis over the last word, mocking it.

"I thought you had forgiven me, baby," he lifted his head from the apex of your thighs, raising his pierced eyebrow at you.

You brushed his bangs from his forehead. "That doesn't mean my feelings aren't hurt."

He smiled slowly, totally telling on your intentions. "What do I have to do to get your complete forgiveness?"

You rolled your eyes at his dramatic intonation. "Just don't do it again," you muttered and then nodded back. "Keep going, Josh."

One hand slid down from your waist to caress your leg, you could feel the worn pads of his fingers from playing guitar the whole day.

"Mm," he hummed thoughtfully, his eyes following your face down to your whole body. "Where is this attitude coming from? You've been really bratty since last night."

You saw the glint in his eye again, he was amused by your small tantrum. It was clear to both of you that the reason didn't stem from being stood up by him. There was more.

You shook your head. "'s nothing," you mumbled.

"After this, will you tell me?" he asked and you could tell he wasn't playing anymore.

"Yeah. I will, Josh," you reassured with a small smile.

His eyes read your face with a glint of adoration in them that made your stomach twist, he blinked slowly at you, releasing a short sigh. "I need you so bad, baby," he muttered and leaned in again to kiss your tummy.

"Did you have a bad recording session?" you finally caught on.

Joshua immediately groaned, but softly, making you feel his breath brushing against your lower tummy. "I don't wanna talk about it right now," he muttered. "But yeah. It didn't come out as I expected."

The pad of your thumb brushed over the pierced eyebrow, making his eyelids flutter a bit. "Are you upset about it?"

His hand shifted on your waist just slightly. "No, baby," he frowned, he sucked in a breath through his teeth. "Well, only at myself."

"Would you… like to take it out on me?" your voice dropped to a whisper.

Rare were the times when you mustered such boldness. But ever since your bond with Joshua started to get stronger, the innate shyness revolving around intimate things had started to fade.

"No, bunny," he mumbled, discarding the idea by nodding his head to the side.

"I mean it," you insisted, now tugging at his earlobe with your fingers, toying a little with the piercings on the shell of his ear. "I want it."

Joshua licked his lips briefly, contemplating your proposition again with a calmed darkness in his doe eyes. "Are you sure, baby?"

"I wouldn't be asking if I wasn't."

He read you just a moment before he closed his eyes, leaning his face forward to press his lips in your bare tummy once again. "You know what to do, right?"

Your hand went back to cup the back of his head. "Yes," you whispered, referring to using your safeword whenever necessary.

"That's my girl," he growled softly against your skin, his hot breath making you shudder.

"Mm-mmph," you hummed briefly, letting yourself close your eyes as your boyfriend's grip on your hips tightened a bit.

Joshua hummed after you, leaving a trail of kisses down from your belly button to your mound again, as if that was all he wanted before you interrupted.

"My sweet girl," he whispered almost lovingly against your skin.

He motioned your leg over, making you step on the black couch. Now your leg was angled perfectly for him to dip his head in, pushing his tongue flush in between your pussy lips, as if he were making out with your cunt sloppily, noisily.

"Joshua," you moaned, your fingers tangling on his long hair and holding onto his locks.

He only gave you a low hum in response, shoving his tongue against your clit, teasing it with open kisses. His grip tightened when you squirmed, his fingers digging into your muscle, the hand was located on your hip circled back to cup your butt while the other kept your leg angled open for him.

"God, Josh!" you squealed when he grazed your clit with his teeth gently, but the sensation was overwhelming.

"Hm?" he raised his eyes to match yours, shifting to litter your mound with kisses.

"Too much," you mumbled sheepishly.

"Is it bad?" he asked with a hint of concern.

You shook your head slowly, feeling a rush of warmth tingling on your cheeks.

"If it feels good don't stop me," he replied gruffly, arching his eyebrow at you. "I thought you knew this already, baby."

"Yeah. Sorry," you breathed.

The palm that was firmly placed on your butt lifted only to give you a gentle pat. "Get on all fours, bunny," he muttered and nodded to the chaise longue close to the wide windows that led to the balcony.

As you propped up your knees on the black velvet chaise, you looked up to find your reflection painted on the glass window, a thought crossed your mind—your boyfriend was being soft with you. Granted, he had admitted already that he's into harder stuff than what he has done with you. But this was, to say the least, upsetting.

"Are you holding back?" you asked as soon as you lowered your hands on the cushions.

"No, I'm not," he replied simply, making you cast a look at the man that was still wearing his jeans, torso in full display.

His hair was so long now that his bangs reached the dark circles under his eyes, shadowing his beautiful doe eyes.

"I think you are," you teased, turning to the reflection on the glass now smiling to yourself. "Don't hold back, Josh. I'm not going to break."

The metallic sound of the buckle of his belt made you turn your head to see your boyfriend again. Joshua rolled his eyes and shook his head slightly, he didn't seem annoyed, but the flat tone on his next words made you rethink.

"Stand up straight, wrists on your back."

You had a good view of what happened behind you as you stood back onto your knees, placing your wrists on your back as your boyfriend closed in on you, biting his lower lip as he looped his belt around your wrists.

A low grunt coiled in his throat when he tightened the belt on your wrists, puncturing another hole in it to avoid it unbuckling. He gave it a harsh tug before his eyes zeroed on your face through the reflection on the glass door.

You saw him lean in, so that his lips brushed against the shell of your ear. "Will you be good for me, bunny?"

"Yeah," you whispered shakily, anticipating what Joshua would do next.

"Now bend over," he instructed after he kissed your ear softly.

"But–"

"Don't worry, I got you," he tightened his grip on your bound wrists. "Bend over."

You gulped hard, releasing a nervous sigh before you bent over, steady at first until your face was some eight inches from the seat, not falling onto your nose all due to your boyfriend helping you ease the side of your face against the velvet cushion of the seat.

"I wanted to take my time with you tonight," you heard him sigh in disapproval. "But you had to be so impatient."

"It's not my fault," you whispered. "You haven't been here and I just wanted to—fuck!" you yelped and almost stumbled when his hand came down to spank your ass suddenly.

"I didn't say you could talk back," he ran his hand over the tingling area, cooing softly: "Talking back, throwing tantrums at me. You know what happens when you misbehave. Right, bunny?"

You closed your eyes and nodded. "Yes," you replied.

His hands grabbed you by the hips. "Open your legs," he said softly and you carried out his instruction, widening your stance, gaining more stability to avoid tumbling on the chaise.

Now you were quite completely submitted to him. Your fingers tightened on the leather material of his belt, your wrists with little to no space to budge on the makeshift bondage. Ass up, knees wide apart, face pressed to the seat of the velvet chaise.

"You look so good like this, bunny," you heard him mutter behind you, his hand caressing your lower back lightly, beneath your bound hands, making your eyelids flutter under the tingling sensation.

"Do you want to record this?" you replied mutedly, trying to keep it in you how much you liked to be subdued by his control.

"No," you felt the chaise shift under the weight of one of his knees pressing to the edge. "I have a better idea, bunny. If you behave."

You tried to move slightly to get a view of him on the glass door. He had lost the jeans and was now wearing black briefs only. Propping one knee behind you, your boyfriend was looking at your body, as if trying to decide what to do first before he leaned over you, then you saw one hand press beside you.

Then his lips were on the back of your exposed neck, his fingers moving your hair to the side as he littered your back with wet kisses, slowly, you even felt his breath and when he licked his own lips to kiss you again, knowing well that it was a sensitive area for you.

You squirmed slightly, groaning when your skin awoke with a violent shudder.

"Don't move, bunny," he muttered with his honeyed voice, pressing his lips on your shoulder blade. "If you do, I won't release your hands," he conditioned.

You bit your lip before you could scoff at that. Something told you he wasn't in the mood for more of your taunting. "Okay," you breathed, bracing yourself for more of his delicate kisses.

Joshua left a trail of kisses until he reached your hands, it was then that he moved back, grabbing your hips with his hands and you let out a sharp breath when you felt a kiss on one of your buttocks.

You heard him hum softly against your skin, the reflection on the glass showed your boyfriend on one knee on the floor, his hands traveling from your hips down to cup your ass as his lips kissed the sensitive spot beside your cunt.

You screwed your eyes shut when Joshua ran his tongue between your folds, tasting how aroused you were from the situation alone, from his taunting kisses, from his entire demeanor over you.

"Fuck-k," you squeaked out when he groaned against your sopping core, dipping his tongue in, his hands firmly grabbing you as he pushed his wet muscle against your entrance.

But you dare not move, even if you felt like you could. You let out a raw moan against the black velvet as his tongue ran flatly across your folds, giving your cunt broad and generous strokes, not committing to one motion at all, eating you out sloppily.

"Joshua," you moaned, trying to get as much pleasure from the teasing. "Fuck—babe, please," you whimpered pathetically.

He hummed again, the sound interrupted only by the smacking noise coming from his lips giving your cunt open and deep kisses. You realized then that he didn't seek your pleasure out of this, he was only trying to draw out your arousal, to prep you for something else.

"Please," you begged for more, for something you could use to come.

His tongue glided from your clit, up to your entrance drinking your juices before he continued up, ignoring your whimpers, fingertips digging into your flesh as he gave you a soft, slow stroke with his tongue around your hole, leaving a prickling sensation over, so overwhelming you felt your whole body try to tense and to recoil from feeling good.

"Remember what I said," he told you with a low tone, immediately reading your body language.

You gave him a nod, even if you weren't sure he'd see it. If it felt good, there was no need to stop it. So you tried to relax, breathing in as his tongue lapped again around the tender and very sensitive area, making your fingers curl around the belt you were still restrained by, the feeling so arousing like you've never felt before.

The sensation was too much, it felt undeniably good, a wave of sweet pleasure coursing through your whole body. You felt your pussy throb at each lap of his tongue, stroking slowly around your hole, making it go lax ever so slightly.

The room had fallen silent, the only thing you could hear was his low hums against your skin, the wet sound from his mouth every time he gave another lap over your sensitive ridges with his tongue. Even the voice in your mind had died.

He kissed one of your glutes again, moving one hand to tease your hole with the tip of his finger.

"Josh," you moaned weakly, pressing your face onto the seat cushion to wipe the drool from the corner of your mouth.

"You have the prettiest ass," he hummed entrancingly. "Want me to buy you plugs?"

He pushed one finger in, you screwed your eyes shut again and pressed your face plush against the seat to avoid squirming.

"Mm-mmph," you moaned in affirmation loud enough for him to hear.

"You're being so good for me right now," he cooed softly, dragging his finger out slowly. "Almost forgot how bratty you were before this. You like that, bunny?"

"Mm-mmph," you managed to nod again.

"Want me to fuck you like this?" he asked and you moved your head to peak at the reflection.

"Please, Josh," you gasped at the mere thought.

You saw his reflection rise to his feet. "Without prepping you first, baby? You're not even taking my whole thumb right now," he pointed humbly. "Do you think you can take me?"

You paused, feeling his thumb push in and out gently, making you groan again. The mild penetration was enough to make you feel pleasure, you tried to imagine the same thing but instead of his thumb, with his cock and you immediately gulped.

"Mm? I need an answer baby," he pressed, his tone playful, you caught a shadow of a smile through the reflection.

"Just fuck me," you blurted impatiently with a mewling tone. "Please, Joshua. Fuck me."

"Mmm, you think you deserve it?" he titled his head to one side. "I don't think so."

"Please—I'm being good," you gasped when he pushed his thumb deeper.

"I think we can agree that you need more prepping, baby," he tutted, pulling his thumb out, making you gasp at the loss of stimulation.

"I'll do anything, please, just–"

Then you felt his grip on the belt and gave it a small tug. "I'm pulling you up, ready?"

You got up on your knees with his help, the motion almost made you feel lightheaded but came back to your senses rapidly when you felt the belt loose around your wrists. Joshua threw the belt on the floor.

Your wrists were marked around where the belt held you tight, but you paid little heed to it, your hands were now free to tend to the bulge beneath his boxers, which you yanked down all too excitedly.

A shudder tore through your body when you saw his hard cock spring out of his boxers, his pinkish red tip dripping with precum. You instinctively reached out with a hand to touch, but your boyfriend seized it quickly.

"Josh? What are you doing?" you asked when he dragged you to the balcony, sliding the glass door open to welcome in a cold midnight breeze into the hotel suite.

"Do you still want me to fuck you in public? For everyone to know?" he asked, as you both stepped out to the balcony, wholly naked.

Your eyes locked with his briefly and you have him half a nod, a question lingering on the tip of your tongue. But you concluded that this was his intention all along when you first prompted him to record you and he declined.

"Hands on the railing, bunny," he instructed.

You gasped when he pressed the front of his body to your back, his hard cock wedging in your butt as you did what he told you, holding the cold metal railing of the balcony with a big breath.

The city was buzzing with nightlife, as you would expect during a friday night, the hotel was located at the heart of the city too, so you were quite literally facing another big building, you could see each light turning on as another was snuffed simultaneously.

"Nervous, bunny?" he asked in your ear, grabbing your hips and pulling them to his, and you bent over slightly for him, the movement felt almost natural. "I'll take that as a no," he muttered with a chuckle.

All the teasing, stimulating using his mouth and fingers did so that you were aching for more, your body pulsated for more. So when you felt the tip of his cock nudging at your entrance, you almost considered pleading with him to stop teasing you.

But as if reading your mind, he slid inside you in one go to his hilt with a low moan from his part and without any preamble, he started thrusting. He gave you no pause for you to adjust, to take in the sheer size of his cock stuffing you up so good it made you gasp.

"Fuck," you groaned through clenched teeth when his cockhead immediately found that glorious spot inside you.

"Do you like this, baby?" he muttered and you nodded with your head, biting your lower lip to avoid being heard. "Why so quiet now?"

You couldn't think of a good response at that, your mind going blank from the pleasure coursing through your body.

Joshua leaned over you, pressing his chest to your back without relenting on his deep thrusts. "Don't shy away now, baby," he grunted against your shoulder. "Wanna hear those pretty sounds you make for me."

He adjusted himself again pushing one hand against the small of your back, so you were now fully bent for him, tits hanging over the balcony railings, still holding with your hands. Your face burning up when you caught sight of the balconies below you, the cars far down on the street. The vulnerability you felt at that moment urged you to hide, to cover up.

But there was no shying away now, not when your boyfriend read your silence so well.

"Joshua!" you gasped loudly when he started plowing on you, the sound of his front slamming on your butt the only thing filling your ears.

"That's it, baby," you heard him say through a sigh making you turn to cast a look over your shoulder.

His darkened eyes were set on you, on your body bouncing on his hard and deep thrusts. Your boyfriend showed you a fucked out grin when he caught your eye looking over. Blinking slowly, you saw his throat bobbing when he swallowed back a moan. "Fuck, baby, hear that? You're gonna have an audience."

"Fuckfuckfuck," you screwed your eyes shut when you heard voices on the balcony directly below you.

You clamped down a hand on your mouth, trying to muffle your cries of pleasure as your boyfriend continued plowing on you with little care if you were seen or heard.

"No, no, no, don't hold back, bunny," he told you now. Then he raised a hand and brought it down on your ass harshly, drawing out a moan from his part when your walls clenched around him.

"Fuck!" you yelped loudly, the sound of your voice quieted down the fuss going on the balcony below. You held the rails with your hands. "Josh, please."

"You wanted me to fuck you like this, bunny," he reminded you, noticing the same thing you did. "Now everyone knows you're mine."

"God, fuck," you blurted, keeping an eye over the balcony in case someone thought of looking up, then you would need to hide.

"I want to hear you bunny," he groaned breathlessly, spanking you one more time, firmer this time, making your walls squeeze around him and you knew he liked it too when you heard a low guttural moan escape him.

"Arrgh, Joshua!" you cried in a high-pitch tone, your eyes welling up with tears, feeling a mixture of embarrassment and pleasure coursing through you.

"That's right, baby. It's me who's making you feel like this," you heard him grunt slightly.

"It's all you, Josh," you gasped, trying to close your eyes to the city around you, but the exposedness kept you alert.

"D'you like this baby?" he purred with a hollow laugh when you gave him a big nod with your head. "Yeah? My baby likes being fucked in the open, for everyone to see."

"Mmph, yeah, I do—fuck," you mewled out, but then you felt him tease around your hole again. A finger pushing in, slowly at first, but deeper this time, sending you a hot wave of pleasure. "Fuck, Josh. Babe, I–"

"Don't hold back," he reminded you, his voice strained and you knew he was close too.

You could hear hushed voices coming from the balcony below and muffled laughs between the slapping of Joshua's skin against yours. You tried so hard to contain yourself but couldn't under the amount of pleasure building on your body, making you gasp and mewl out incoherent, half thoughts.

"Joshua, I can't," you gasped. "I'm so—fuck, babe! So close," you blurted, your voice raw.

"Gonna come, baby? You're gonna come on this cock, hm?" he asked tauntingly and you didn't need to see him to know that he was smiling.

Your body was immersed in pleasure like never before. The feeling of his finger pushing gently in and out of your hole added a pressure to your release building up inside you.

"Yes! God, yes, 'm so close, Josh," you sighed a moan.

"Come, baby," he whispered impatiently now. "Come all over my cock."

Then the tension in your body snapped, then it was all sweet, sweet pleasure as you came undone, back arching, jaw going slack. "Josh, god, fuck, Joshua!" you cried out lewdly, your voice rang hoarse, breaking through the night.

"Fuck, I'm cumming too," he said through a breath, then a guttural moan followed, his fingertips digging on your hip so hard you knew it would leave marks.

But his hips continued to slam hard against you, pushing his cock deeper inside your pulsating walls as he came with you, fucking you through your long and very loud orgasm. You heard his raw moans over yours, felt his cum dripping down your thigh right after.

The thrusts came to a halt sloppily and gently removed his thumb from your hole when he felt you come down from your high. You had your eyes closed but you could hear the faint sounds of your little audience below, the hushed exchange of comments and small laughs.

Joshua's arms came to wrap your body, pulling you off the balcony rails in one sudden movement. He pressed you tightly against him, peppering your shoulder with kisses, you felt him breathing hard on your neck, prickling your skin.

"I love you, I love you," he whispered in your ear.

"I love you too, Joshua," you replied, leaning your head back on his shoulder.

"You did so good, bunny," he sighed before kissing your hair.

You closed your eyes weakly, the buzz of the city seemed to die when you caught the sound of his hard breaths, the stutter of his heartbeat vibrating against your body.

"Will you tell me what happened at the session?" you asked in a hum, lowering your head to kiss the forearm wrapping you by your shoulders.

"Yeah. Will you tell me what's going on with you?" he asked in return, still panting hard in your ear.

You gave him a small smile. "Yeah."

"In the shower?" he added tentatively.

"Definitely."

"Let's go," he mumbled, still breathless.

But he pulled out and motioned you over to his arms, which carried you bridal-style to the bathroom. Joshua didn't see you smiling happily at him, but you could see his features had relaxed considerably, his whole demeanor had changed.

"I was upset with you," you mumbled out the words slowly with a sigh as he lowered you onto the floor.

"Was?" your boyfriend inquired before turning to turn the shower on, sticking out a hand to test the water temperature.

"Was," you reassured, nodding your head.

"Why?"

"I felt like I made an effort to come visit you, but you haven't had time for me at all," you replied, trying to mask your hurt feelings under a shrug.

Joshua held out a hand for you as he stepped into the shower and you followed him.

"I didn't stand you up on purpose," he muttered and then pouted. "You know that, right baby? I was busy."

"I know, babe," you conceded softly. "Maybe it's time for us to accept that we're going to be busier than before."

"We'll manage," he asserted, grabbing one of your hands to kiss your knuckles, to then brace your arm over his shoulder, and you did the same with your other arm, encircling his neck loosely.

"I know we will, Josh," you pressed your lips in a smile.

"Is that it? Or is there something else that made you upset?" he pried, reading your face.

You paused, then shook your head slightly. "It's nothing," you whispered, using one hand to push his wet bangs back from his forehead.

"Baby," he mumbled reproachfully. "We promised we would tell each other everything."

"I'm just being dumb. I swear it's nothing serious," you insisted.

"If that's the case, might as well tell me, right?"

You rolled your eyes, he was right. "I felt a little jealous," you muttered reluctantly, avoiding his eyes.

"What? Why? When?" he blurted and you darted a look back to his face to see him frowning.

"Last night at the backstage," you started. "The friend you introduced to me last night, Thea."

"What about her, baby?" he smiled softly, the expression on his face changed from confusion to amusement.

"She was cute. And you seemed to be pretty close too," you added sheepishly, trying to hold his gaze but it felt nearly impossible.

"I barely even said anything to her," Joshua chuckled briefly, but not in a condescending way, his eyes looking at you fondly.

"But I felt something, okay?" you replied impishly, trying not to let your feelings show.

"Bunny, she is an old friend," he explained with a shrug that denoted his easiness about the subject: "Whatever happened between us, happened years ago. It means nothing to me."

You pushed your eyebrows up. "So something did happen between you?"

"A long time ago," he showed you a small smile, lowering his gaze so his eyes seemed bigger. "It was just sex, nothing more."

"Are you sure?" you mumbled.

"Yeah, baby," he replied shortly, wrapping one arm around your waist. "Completely sure."

You were slowly connecting the dots, reading the glint in his dark eyes. You pushed a hand on his forehead, combing his long dark hair back. "Are you turned on by this, babe?"

Joshua nodded, running the tip of his tongue on his lower lip before sinking his teeth down on it.

You couldn't deny that you also felt aroused by his reassurance over you. You felt how much he wanted you, and you could see it in his eyes.

"Why were you jealous, bunny?" he asked, his half-lidded eyes reading the features of your face. "I barely even held a conversation with her for a minute."

You darted a look down on his body, only to find out that your boyfriend was hard already, his erection pressing on your lower tummy the moment he pulled you to his warm and wet body.

"Mm," you huffed, starting to feel a little lightheaded, the warmth, the steam, his amused eyes on you. "I just was. I didn't like the way she looked at you," you mumbled out.

Joshua reached down, a hand curving over your thigh and pulled it up to wrap around his hip, propping one foot over the rim of the bathtub, so your thigh was resting comfortably. Now with his hand freed, he wasted no time, grabbing his cock and guiding it to your core, sheathing himself inside you with a low moan from your part.

"Feel that?" he growled, resting his forehead on top of yours, droplets of water falling into your parted mouth. "You drive me crazy. No one has ever made me feel this way. No one but you."

Your eyelids fluttered uncontrollably, warm water ran down your faces but you couldn't tear your eyes from your boyfriend's face, his beautiful lips.

"Joshua," you moaned, holding onto his shoulders for more support as you started moving your hips in a gentle sway, back and forth, not hard nor fast. Just feeling him, completely hard inside you.

"I'm here, baby," he muttered with a ragged sigh. "I'm yours."

Adrenaline, dopamine, whatever it was, ran in a frenzied rush across your body, shocking you over how deeply fascinated the sound of those words made you feel.

"Mine," you replied entrancingly.

He nodded with a small movement. "No one else's. You're the only woman I want. The woman I love."

A broken moan escaped you and you pressed your crotch down to his hilt, unable to roll your hips to your own satisfaction. Joshua noticed your struggle, his hands gripping your hips tightly, forcing you to rut against him with more purpose.

"I'm here baby," he repeated with a low rasp. "I love you."

"I love you," you sobbed back.

"I never wanted someone the way I want you," he confessed, tilting his head forward, forehead bumping with yours as he continued to help you roll your hips on him. "I'm crazy about you, baby. You don't even know."

You tried to keep your eyes trained on him, on the beautiful features of his face, the droplets of water running down his face, his trembling eyelids, the parted lips as he let out breathy moans.

"Before you, I had given up the idea of finding someone for me. I didn't care, I thought I was fine being on my own," he whispered, and you could tell that he was trying hard to keep himself vulnerable.

You moved a hand from his shoulder to cup his face, Joshua leaned against your touch and he opened his eyes, blinking lazily to find yours.

"I want you so fucking much," he gave you a delirious laugh. "I am so in love with you."

You pushed his wet long hair away from his face so you could see his pretty face, ignoring the tears brimming in your eyes.

His pretty lips parted to let out a disgruntled moan, the sound reverberating inside the shower walls, sending a powerful shiver through your body.

"Fuck," Joshua breathed, his eyebrows knitting slightly. "Baby, come for me. I want you to come first," he said through a ragged breath, his hands moving your hips with more urgency now.

The emotions you felt at that moment had robbed you of your voice, so you could only nod at him in affirmation before removing the hand cupping his chin and tucking it between your body and his.

Joshua swallowed hard at the sight of you starting to rub your clit with fast swirls. "That's it, baby," he nodded, his voice was raspy now. His forehead dropped on yours again, breathing hard from a mixture of exhaustion and pleasure.

Your orgasm came fast, making you convulse slightly against his body, you tried to keep your eyes locked with his, as he watched your mouth part and your eyebrows knit together.

"Baby," you cooed, your voice surprisingly sweet and low. "I love you."

His eyes fluttered close, a shudder shaking his body, making his lower lip drop, a low raspy moan escaping him as he emptied himself inside you.

You clashed your mouth with his, your arms encircling his neck to hold onto him, the euphoric feeling of being so in love making you want to melt into his arms.

"I love you too, bunny," he gasped.

Joshua's hand blindly searched for the tap before shutting it off. His eyes read the features of your face with some thought. "I know we're both new to this. But we have to trust each other, baby," he muttered, leaning down to press a kiss on your forehead.

"I do trust you," you replied with a shy mutter.

His gaze softened, appearing to understand everything now and then he nodded quietly. "We understand each other, then," he whispered, turning around and reached out for a towel, which he wrapped around his waist and then he took another one, wrapping your body with it.

A small squeal left your mouth when he sloppily lifted you from the ground, carrying you bridal style again and to the bedroom. "Are you hungry? I can order room service."

You caressed his cheek, and smiled when you were showered by some droplets of water that fell from his wet hair and onto your face. "Can we order pancakes? And strawberry milkshakes?"

He smiled endearingly at you. "Anything my baby wants," he muttered, placing you gently on the bed. "I'll make the call and then we'll talk, okay?"

In the few minutes it took him to place the order, you got up from the bed and went looking for the T-shirt you were wearing earlier. It had been thrown to the side of the couch and you put it on in one go.

You were about to turn to head towards the bed when you were hugged from behind, the surprise sent a shock down your spine but you welcomed it with a short chuckle.

"Your pancakes will be here shortly, Ms. Hong," Joshua whispered in your ear, moving a hand that was pressing on your tummy to move back your wet hair to kiss your cheek.

"I like the sound of that," you replied with a sweet smile.

"The pancakes?" he taunted with a cheeky grin.

"Being Ms. Hong too," you said.

Joshua paused, almost as if he hadn't expected you to say it, let alone turn to look at him. He must have read the honesty and love in your face, because he remained speechless.

"Baby, are you serious?" he asked, his voice was rendered a mere whisper. A slow smile crept in his face and when you didn't immediately answer, he added: "Let me get the ring. Hold on."

"Shut up," you gasped with a nervous laugh. "You don't have a ring."

"How do you know that?" he pressed a feathery kiss in your lips, his pointer and middle finger caressing your cheek, holding your chin. "I might do."

You turned in his embrace, encircling his neck with your arms, his hands followed your movement, firmly placing them on your waist. "You need to slow down, Joshua Hong," you whispered, moving your hands to his neck, where you could feel his pulse, racing at your touch.

"In my defense, you started it," he replied, popping out his lower lip in a small pout but then broke into a smile.

"Marriage, kids..." you smiled anxiously when you were able to feel his pulse under your thumbs. "We haven't been in a relationship for longer than a month, Josh."

"And?" his pierced eyebrow shot up. "I love you. I've never been more sure about this."

"And I love you too, Joshua," you tilted your head to one side. "But maybe... maybe we need to wait a little."

"Fine," he replied with some reluctance. But you could still see the spark in his big eyes, the joy and the love written in them.

"I mean it," you said firmly and he smiled, giggling cheekily.

"Alright, alright," he nodded, leaning down to press a kiss in your lips, nudging the tip of your nose with his. "I'm still calling you Ms. Hong."

The next day you had to catch the earliest flight home, as you had been told that the last delivery of books for you to sign had arrived. So you called a taxi as soon as you woke up, as you had overslept and were late.

"Are you sure you don't want me to come with you at the airport?" Joshua asked, his brow furrowing as he looked at your face.

"I'm sure," you replied for the nth time. You were standing on the sidewalk, waiting for the taxi. A sudden jolt of nervousness twisted your stomach when you blurted out: "Were you able to clear your schedule for Friday night?"

Joshua's gaze softened, looking remorseful as he dropped his eyes to the ground and shook his head gently. "I'm sorry, bunny," he mumbled. "I won't be able to be there with you."

Your heart deflated and you were quick to give him a nod. "Okay," you whispered with an empty smile. "It's okay. Um, I'll call you when I get home, alright?"

The taxi stopped in front of you and you turned to reach out for the handle. Joshua's face contorted, his frown deepening when you were about to leave without saying something.

"Come here," he muttered before you could get into the car, cupping the back of your head to press his lips with yours. "I love you, baby."

"I love you, Joshua," you replied, and as the car drove away you wished you hadn't said it so dryly.

✮ a/n: hi there my lovelies! ◕⩊◕

i truly don't like to split this chapter but the word count really got out of hand here. i'll post the next part as soon as i finish writing it (yes, i'm still writing it don't look at me like that)

for those who wanted juicy angst, you'll find it in the next part! 👀🩵

oki doki. that's it for me now. i love you all, drink some water, use sunscreen.... i'm not asking you to reblog or comment or like, do whatever you want idgaf

haha i love yous! ( > 〰 < )♡

toodles!

next part

support my work🩵

#svt smut #joshua hong smut #svthub #seventeen smut #joshua smut #svt fanfic #seventeen x reader #seventeen imagines #joshua x reader #seventeen fanfic #joshua scenarios #svt x reader #hannieween #ff:city lights

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i-drop-level-one-loot · 1 year

Text

I worry about you (Clingy!Yandere x Delinquent!Reader)

CW: body trauma, unhealthy relationships, yandere behavior

"I don't understand, why are you saying these things?!" Everett shouted, tugging on (Reader's) jacket like a man fearful of drowning. The two stood at the top of a set of wooden outdoor stairs built into a steep hill in the city's little hiking trail/park, a meeting spot where they often hung out after school.

His brown eyes glowed under the sun like molten gold, churning with heartache as he held onto his only friend.

(Reader) kept their face rigid like stone, fighting the desire to retract what they had said, their decision was final. It was for Everett's own good. "Dude, stop acting crazy. You're acting like we were dating. I'm just saying that I need space. Go make other friends, go on dates, I don't care. Jesus, just stop hanging onto me all the time."

Lies, all lies. I don't mind how clingy you are. I love that you stay by my side. I know I have a shit personality, I know I'm trash, so I really appreciate that you're the only one to stay my friend. You've been my friend since we were ten years old, so please, PLEASE, fucking take the hint. I've seen that the teachers have started to treat you differently just because you're my friend. And how many times do I have to rescue you from wannabe thugs who only fuck with you because they hate me? You deserve better than that.

You deserve better than me.

(Reader) roughly shook their only friend off their arm. It was painful now, for both of them, but (Reader) knew it was for the best.

"But why? What did I do wrong?" Everett sniffled, rubbing his eyes as the waterworks persisted. (Reader) turned to leave, unable to watch Everett any longer without their resolve crumbling. "WAIT!" Everett panicked, reaching out to latch onto (Reader's) arm again. (Reader) felt his fingers brush against their arm, and threw back their elbow to push Everett away.

They didn't know, however, that Everett had stepped forward. (Reader) misjudged how hard to push, not knowing that Everett was closer than he was just a second ago. Their wrist smashed into Everett's chest, causing him to stumble backwards, and tumble down the stairs.

Eyes widening in fear, (Reader) immediately began sprinting down the steps, skipping two at a time on the way down as their friend bounced against the weathered wood, hitting the dirt at the bottom hard. Their heart was beating so fast it felt like they would have a heart attack as they jumped the last couple stairs, crouching over their best friend crying in the fetal position.

"Everett, oh my God, are you okay?!" They gingerly scooped his upper half into their lap, examining his head for injuries.

"My- my arm..." Everett cradled his arm, crushing (Reader) further with guilt.

Placing his head down carefully, (Reader) took off running, calling out for help in hopes that someone nearby had a phone to call an ambulance. They disappeared out of Everett's sight, hearing them hollering as they ran away.

As soon as (Reader) vanished from view, Everett stopped crying, sitting up miserably. How did this happen?

Everything had been going so perfectly. Everett had set himself up as a weak, innocent best friend for (Reader), tailoring his personality for the past eight years to ensure that (Reader) would never leave him. When his family uprooted his life at the age of ten, he already knew there was no chance of happiness in his future. It was hard enough convincing anyone at his old school to like a freak like him, but being a new kid on top of having a personality that for some reason pushed everyone away? Everett knew it was hopeless.

But it seemed fate had other plans for him. The very first day in the new home Everett attempted to climb the large tree in his fenceless backyard and slipped, falling out of one of the lower branches. It hadn't hurt all that much, really just stinging a bit, but he didn't have time to even sit up before his new neighbor was rushing over to help him, having witnessed the fall from their back window. (Reader) was an angel, the summer sunlight illuminating their form like a halo. They didn't waste a second, pulling Everett's body onto their back, struggling under his weight but forcing their tiny muscles to carry Everett to his parents. It didn't even hurt, and Everett was more than capable of walking on his own, but having someone his own age care about him for the first time in his entire ten years of life.. he played into it, relishing in the attention he was receiving, forcing large crocodile tears out in hopes (Reader) would stay by his side longer. And it worked.

It worked for eight years, so why were they pushing him away now?

He constantly allowed himself to trip in front of (Reader), embarrassing himself over and over to keep them paying attention to him. Even now, throwing himself backwards down a flight of stairs while making it look like an accident, just to prevent (Reader) from leaving him.

Unfortunately, nothing was actually broken on him. He glanced around, finding a rock almost too large to grasp in one hand. Unlike when they were children, Everett didn't believe crying would be enough to keep (Reader) by his side. He rolled up the sleeve on the arm he pretended was broken, biting down onto the front of his hoodie. It didn't matter if (Reader) was only with him out of guilt, it only mattered that they were with him.

Everett smiled through gritted teeth, thinking about (Reader) sitting next to him in the hospital, refusing to leave his side for even a second, then brought the heavy rock down onto his arm with an audible crack.

Please continue worrying about me.

#yandere #yandere x reader #yandere best friend #clingy yandere #yandere fanfiction #writing #not proofread #tw manipulation

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spellboundtales · 3 months

Text

Fic rec

here are some MASTERPIECES

🩰hurt/comfort

🧸Fluff

🦋Angst

🌺Smut

Spencer Reid

🩰 🧸what he knows by @luveline || reader is insecure and Spencer comforts her!

🧸 Love Sick by @criminalmindzjunkie || Spencer is jealous that reader has a date! Now he has to find a way to sabotage it

🌺the more loving one by @criminalmindzjunkie || Professor!Spencer catches himself falling for one of his students. i'm so down bad for Professor!Spencer

🧸Holy Ground by @writer-in-theory || Spencer is your neighbor! Reader and him start a conversation with…steaky notes!

🩰🧸You’re my future, past and present by @mismatched-sockss || exes to… what will happen when reader and Spencer will see each other again after years?

🩰🌺🦋A marriage story by @bunnylovesani || PostPrison!Spencer and reader have to deal with the aftermath, trying to save their marriage

🧸this request by @ddejavvu || sunshine!reader purposely telling wrong facts when Spencer is around

🧸i can see you by @januaryembrs || the desk jokey from the floor below has caught spencer's eye...maybe he caught her eyes too

🧸you're too sweet for me (you were like an angel to me and when you know, you know) by @januaryembrs || sunshineRookie!reader and PostPrison!Spencer in kinda 3 parts (literally the holy trinity)...you should def check all her works because this is g o l d

🩰🧸this request by @nereidprinc3ss || reader and spencer are friends and he comfrots her after a bad date with a real jerk... when i tell you that this one is one of my favorite...felt that

🧸this request by @nereidprinc3ss || Spencer helps reader to change her bandages...and things get...funny...

🦋🧸lovely to sit between comfort and chaos (pt2) by @cerisereids || reader meets Spencer when he's on a case in her hometown

🧸the Love Hypotesis (series) by @goldentournesol || reader kisses the first man she sees all because of a lie...turns out that man is also her professor

🧸this request by @reiderwriter || Spencer babying an obvlious reader... the team has enough.

🧸isn't she pretty, dad? by @reiderwriter || dad!Spencer and his son playing matchmaker with his teacher

🌺🩰following rules (+ we can't be friends) by @little-diable || reader is JJ's daughter...what could ever happen between her and Spencer? (spoiler: a lot)

🧸carriage six (+pt2 platform ten) by @avis-writeshq || Spencer can't help but notice the same pretty girl on his train ride to work...what happens when she catches him ogling her?

🧸🌺🩰Emergency room by @violetrainbow412-blog || in the middle of the night reader receives a call from the hospital...turns out reader is spencer's emergency contact...but they broke up over a year ago

Aaron Hotchner

🦋fix it and 🩰fix it together by @miley1442111 || this 2 part fic, in which Aaron and wife!reader fight, because he compares reader to Haley..can they fix their marriage? this is soul shattering guys... (check all her works because when i tell you her writing style is amazing...)

🩰not so subtle by @ssahotchnerr || (not so) secret relationship with Aaron, who desperatly wants to comfort reader after a though case...

🌺how did she? by @little-diable || Hotch and reader meet at a cafe...he looks familiar... (dad'sFriend!Hotch)

Remus Lupin

🧸“I am not very good at flirting, am I?” by @hello-everyfandom || a study date with remus..wait...is it even a date?

Anthony Bridgerton

🧸🌺🦋Take my hand by @rubysunnday || Anthony tries his best as a matchmaker for reader…truth is reader wants only Anthony…

Joel Miller

🧸weakness by @joelsgreys || a lovely afternoon at Bill and Frank's…what could go wrong?? maybe it's time that some feelings come out of the surface...

Din Djarin

🦋🧸touching din by @archieimagines || three times Din shows you that he cares...even bendin his rules a bit to do so

🧸 significant by @softlyspector || Din has called reader Riduur for months…but what does it mean?

#spencer reid x reader #anthony bridgerton x reader #fic rec #din djarin #mandalorian x reader #remus lupin x reader #joel miller x reader #tlou hbo #the last of us #remus lupin #remus lupin x you #marvel x reader #criminal minds #aaron hotchner #aaron hotch x reader #spencer reid fic recs #spencer reid

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sweetenerobert · 1 year

Text

DRUNKEN’ NIGHTS

dom!joel miller x dad!male reader

genre: neighbor joel, no outbreak au, explicit, minors dni

summary: an opportunity to have a guy's night with your daughter’s best friend’s dad turns into a heart-to-heart into an unforgettable night to remember

warnings: strong language, infidelity, joel is 40, reader is 38, unprotected P in A, dirty talk, angsty thoughts, oral (m giving/m receiving), pet names, fingering, creampies,

word count: 4.9k

a/n: gif by @shirks-all-responsibilities

a/n: dividers by @firefly-graphics

a/n: italics = thoughts

official playlist

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YOUR DAUGHTER, MARIGOLD, WAS CLOSE TO SARAH, JOEL’S AND ADALINE’S DAUGHTER.

You remember the first time you met Sarah, it was a late night at work and you came home to see your daughter laughing at a TV Show that she and Sarah were both watching, and they were a little nervous and surprised to see you.

You reassured Sarah saying that your home is open to her.

You met Sarah’s parents; Joel and Adaline after Sarah invited them to have dinner with you, Marigold and Sarah. You remember that you noticed how distant/close Joel and Adaline were during the whole dinner.

It was like they weren’t present as a couple but as a couple of friends. Of course they did their best to hide it but sometimes they slipped through the cracks.

Later that night, you learned from your daughter, Marigold, that Joel and Adaline weren’t as close as they were before they were married — Adaline travels a lot for work, so the relationship wasn’t as strong as they hoped.

After that night, you noticed that inviting Joel and Adaline for hangouts, activities, game nights, and movie nights always had Joel come over with Sarah by himself, and Adaline always worked.

That concluded, you and Joel were always hanging out, drinking together while your daughters had their fun.

This was one of those nights where it would just be you and Joel at his house, with Sarah and Marigold hanging out at yours to have their privacy.

You bought a bottle of rum you were never gonna finish all by yourself and you thought this would be the best time to get rid of the bottle that's been eyeing you for the past 10 years.

You already knew the girls were over at your house. Marigold’s bedroom held the sound of giggling and hushed whispers. You shook your head as you had the neck of the rum bottle in your clammy palm.

You were walking across the cul-de-sac in the already warm orange sky to Joel’s front door, bringing your free hand and knocking on the wooden door in front of you.

You hear shuffling getting closer and closer to the door, and then Joel opens the door, and you smile, and Joel shoots one back.

“Hey, man, what’s our poison for tonight?” Joel asks, leaning on the doorframe.

You held the bottle in your hand and showed to Joel.

“A wedding gift that’s been sitting in my cabinet for ten years, she and me never opened it.”

Joel knew you were divorced but never knew the reason behind it. It wasn't like you never told him. He just never asked.

“You sure you wanna drink this, man?” Joel asks, taking the bottle from your hand.

“Wedding gifts are unique. I know you're divorced and everything but —”

“It's fine, It cluttered the cabinet. Good excuse to clean out my cabinet,” You shrugged.

“Okay, let's get to drinkin’,” Joel smirked, getting off the door frame.

You walked behind him and close the door behind you. You sit on the brown couch in front of the TV — seeing that it's on, you can't take your eyes away from the bright screen. It was a movie that Joel must have been watching before you knocked on the door.

Glancing towards the kitchen, you notice Joel walking back toward you with two glasses in his hands; you fix your position on the couch as Joel sits beside you.

“Here we go,” Joel states, handing you a glass.

“Thank you, cowboy,” You smile, taking the glass from Joel’s hand.

“I can't believe you call me that,” Joel chuckles.

“I’m just glad you don’t call me city boy.”

“I might have to start.”

You place the glass on Joel’s coffee table and unscrew the rum bottle cap, putting the bottle cap on the table.

“Let’s get to drinkin’ then.”

“Let’s get to drinking then,” You smile.

You grab your cup and pour some rum into Joel’s glass and then some into your glass, placing the glass bottle on the coffee table.

“To gettin’ drunk,” Joel nods, holding his rum-filled glass near you.

“We sound like alcoholics — but, to getting drunk,” You laugh.

You and Joel clink your glasses together, and you both knock back a sip of the rum before you start coughing.

The rum made your throat feel like it was burning, and it stayed for a couple of seconds while you were coughing; Joel couldn't help but start chuckling, watching your pain endure.

“Okay, you brought this, and your actin’ like it already killed you,” Joel laughed.

“Look, Mr. Drinker, I’m not much of a drinker; I only act like I am, so you don't judge, city boy, over here,” You countered.

“Aww, is city boy a baby?” Joel pouted.

You shove him. “You suck,” You laugh.

You and Joel probably drank ten or eleven drinks, but it was apparent; you both were drunk like never before. The night sky came rushing in through his large windows.

“Okay, wait, you and Tommy rode motorcycles for his birthday?” You laughed.

“Yeah, yeah, and it was so fuckin’ fun; the adrenaline rush was high that day; I miss it.”

You and Joel were laughing together like lifelong friends. Two dads who were just getting irresponsibly drunk while their daughters did their own thing.

Leaning your head on the backrest of the couch, from the corner of your eye, you can see Joel smiling and leaning back on the sofa, his arm outstretched on top of the couch.

You could tell Joel was hiding something behind that smile, though, as he was looking at the now-muted TV; you could tell something was on his mind.

“Joel,” You state, closing your eyes.

“Yeah, city boy?”

“I can tell something’s on your mind.”

“How? Your eyes are closed,” He reported.

You open your eyes slowly and turn your head to look at him. “Thanks for noticing, detective.”

He chuckled at that nickname.

“But, is there legitimately something on your mind?”

He took a long extended breath and spoke.

“Why did you get a divorce?”

You knew that question would come up eventually; you couldn't dodge the question any more than you wanted to. At this point, you felt like you could tell Joel the real reason.

It could have been the rum messing with your mind, but you acted like you knew Joel for more than ten years when in reality, you only knew him less than five months.

You inhaled and then exhaled before answering Joel.

“I’m gay, no other reason,” You spoke.

Joel couldn't tell where his emotions were in his drunken mind. He wanted to sympathize, comfort, and let you rant about what was on your mind. But in his drunk-filled head, he thought you needed a distraction.

“Do you wanna know how Adaline and I met?”

You nod your head slowly.

“Back in high school, I was this star athlete and shit. She was a wannabe journalist at that point,” Joel started.

“So she wants to interview me because I was this great athlete and shit, we go back to my house, my folks don't come home until later that night. As we're talking, I don't think she’s listening at this point — and she grabs my bulge.”

“What?” You question fixing your position.

“Yeah! I was surprised at it, too; she was now next to me, rubbing, then she unzips my fly, and she’s now rubbing my cock. Her hands are so fuckin’ warm, she’s rubbing and rubbing, and then she stops and walks out with my cock throbbing.”

You could tell with Joel’s feeble attempt at a distraction he was hard himself. He was rubbing his aching cock on top of his jeans.

He was breathing through his nose to the point you could hear every inhale and exhale coming from his nose.

“Your hard, aren't you?”

Joel was nodding his head in between breaths.

“Yeah,” Joel breathed.

Joel stopped rubbing his cock and placed his hands on the sides of him.

Sober, you would have just sat in the uncomfortable silence in the room, but drunk, you did something you would be scared to do if sober.

You place your hand over Joel’s cock; you can feel it throb in your palm.

“W-what are you doing?” Joel exclaimed.

“Helping you out,” You answered.

You knew that this was wrong to do this, your mind was screaming at you to stop, but your actions were speaking louder than your head.

You unzipped Joel’s jeans and placed your hand in between his zipper, and started rubbing his cock on top of his boxer-briefs.

He threw his head back in pleasure and lust.

“Damn, city boy, you know what you're doing,” Joel chuckles.

You didn't hear his statement, you were dick-whipped, and you wanted more. You unbuckled his belt and jeans; then you see his cock bounce up with his boxers, making a tent.

“My cock isn't gonna take care of itself, is it?”

You fix Joel’s cock so his cock can go through the hole in his boxers.

His thick cock was throbbing right before you as you took the tip of his dick in your mouth. You swirled your tongue around the slit of his dick as he was moaning with pleasure.

“Oh — fuck, yes.” Joel moaned.

You wrapped your hand around his length as you were taking his size in your mouth.

He was throwing his head back and sucking his teeth as you were pleasuring him to the point that he would explode. Joel hadn't felt something this fantastic in so long; he had forgotten what it felt like.

This feeling he yearned for it once again after so many years; he missed it, the way his body betrayed him showing him that he was enjoying this too well.

The men you gave oral pleasure to in the past can never compare to Joel’s length, and you were addicted to him. You mouth was taking his length with anticipation like a prize you always wanted.

“Such a good fuckin’ cock sucker, city boy,” Joel grunted.

He places his hand onto your head ands pushing down as you were going down on his dick. He was making you speed up a bit.

But going your own pace, you knew he would enjoy it, his dick is sleek in your mouth, almost like a piece of ice in your mouth. You feel his thumb rubbing your head as you take his length.

You take your mouth away from his cock as his dick throbs like a spring.

A line of saliva connect from your mouth to Joel’s cock. Joel’s now having full body breathes, he can’t control the adrenaline and lust coursing through his entire body at this point.

Joel stands up and takes his pants off along with his boxers, you watch as he drops them around his ankle. You can tell Joel is writhing in anticipation, but he’s hiding it.

“Work your magic, city boy.”

With that, Joel shoots a wink as you slide off the couch and kneel on the wooden floor below you. He was standing — towering over you with his hands on his hips.

“No! What are you thinking? He’s married,” You thought.

Ignoring your head again, you take Joel’s cock in your mouth as moans escape his lips. He’s starting to tremble as your head moves, almost bobbing even. You take his cock out of your mouth, and you start stroking his thick, sleek cock. Looking up at him, he gives you an almost weak smile.

“How’s that?” You ask.

“Better — than I — could ever imagine.”

“Wait, he’s imagined this before — Stop! That does not excuse this!”

You place your tongue under his cock, at the base of his balls, and start licking and sucking on his balls.

Joel’s moans kept escaping his lips; it was like music to your ears. Your heart was pumping, hearing Joel moan like he didn't have a care in the world.

“Damn, baby. You so fuckin’ good at that,” Joel exclaimed.

He places his hand on the side of your head.

“Get on the fuckin’ couch,” Joel commands.

“What?” You ask, swallowing your spit.

“I said, take off your fuckin’ clothes and get on the damn couch; I’m going to fuck the shit out of you like no man has before,” Joel commanded.

You stood at the man before you, undoing your pants, taking your shoes off, leaving your socks on, and then taking your shirt off.

Joel had already tossed his boots, jeans, and boxers to the side, with his flannel unbuttoned but hanging on his shoulders. He was a mighty 6’2 compared to your height. You were intimidated a bit in your sober mind. But being drunk, you weren't scared; you were standing your ground.

“Look’s like your cock is happy to see me,” Joel breathed.

Before you can answer, Joel takes your cock in his hands and starts to stroke it; you gasp at his movement as you grip his shoulders to keep yourself from falling over.

You never received this type of pleasure from anyone else but yourself before. Joel stroking your cock made you replace your moans with breathing — heaving breathing. You didn't want to show Joel that you were touched-starved at this point.

“C’mon, city boy, if you can make me moan — I should return the favor at the least,” Joel grinned.

He was stroking your cock faster now, and you couldn't help but close your eyes and moan with pleasure. Your nails were going to make half-crescent moon shapes on Joel’s shoulders.

“Ack, Joel —breath— damn this, so fucking amazing,” You breathed.

Joel smiles as you moan his name like that; he can hear the lust radiating from your lips. He knew you were on the brink of feeling satisfaction just by him stroking you right here.

He knew he had to treat you right, he stopped stroking you, and you placed your head in the crook of his neck and acted breathless right there.

“It’s okay, baby,” Joel reassured.

“You need to stop now!”

You get away from the spot in Joel’s neck and back up from him. Joel smiles at you and sits down on the couch; he pats his thigh, indicating for you to ride him. It was intoxicating how he was manspreading and how he patted his thigh.

“You can walk out of here, grab your clothes and walk out!”

You straddle Joel wasting no time acting like he was going to run away.

You could feel the tip of his dick press up against your ass; Joel puts his fingers in your mouth as you drunkenly suck on them.

“Damn, baby, I don't need to tell you anything.”

He takes his fingers away from your mouth and fingers your ass with his spit-covered fingers.

You exclaim with a moan escaping your lips; your nails had dug into the couch material as Joel kept fingering you.

“So fuckin’ tight, baby boy. Have you ever been fingered before?” Joel questioned.

You shook your head and Joel gives you a smirk.

He was enjoying making you squirm under his intoxicating actions. Your moans became quick with efficiency, like you wanted him inside you already.

His fingers were sleek, going inside you and out fast; your knuckles were almost bone white at this point, and your moans kept passing through your teeth like water; Joel’s grin meant he was enjoying every sound you made for him.

He knew that these sounds for him could only be heard by him, considering he was the first person to make you feel this way: overstimulated.

“You like this, city boy?”

“Y-y-ye-yes,” You moaned.

His fingers slipped out of your, and his hands were on your ass.

“You want this cock inside you, baby boy?”

“No!”

“Yes,” You breathed.

“Yes, what?” Joel grunted, smacking your ass.

You yelped as he smacked your ass.

“Yes, Joel, I want your cock inside of me,” You groaned.

Joel’s shit-eating grin meant he’s heard what he’s always wanted to hear.

You waste no time having your ass hover over Joel’s aching cock, mentally preparing yourself, but your mind decides to take over.

“You seriously can not be thinking about doing this, right? What you are committing is an act in which you are going to lie to everyone about how horrible you felt when in reality, you enjoyed every minute of —”

Your mind goes blank as you feel Joel’s cock enter you slowly, intoxicating and rich but slow. You spat a moan out in retaliation for Joel’s dick inside you.

In those enticing, agonizing seconds, Your ass meets the base of his cock, and Joel’s hands make loud contact with your ass.

“God, damn, that's tight, city boy.”

His hands reach your hips like a puzzle piece you lost. Joel lifts you up and slowly goes back down; your moans escape your teeth, your clenched teeth, until Joel rocks his hips up and down. That's when you feel him hit that same spot.

Joel’s hands feel rough as they feel like they were sewn onto your waist, with how tight he grabbed you. His hips felt like they had a mind of their own.

His face had a look of rage and determination all in one; his breaths were quick and through his teeth as he pumped his cock inside you.

“Take this dick, city boy,”

“You know this is wrong. You can't keep doing this!” You thought.

You couldn't contain your moans with every pump Joel delivered; it was addicting.

“Fuck, Joel, I think you're gonna break me,” You exclaim.

“Not yet, baby, soon enough.”

Your hands were on the back of the couch, gripping the fabric. You could tear it off by how your hands were grabbing this.

You yelp again as his hands make contact — hard contact to your ass.

“You’re taking it like such a good boy, baby,” Joel grunted.

“Such a good boy.”

“No! No! No! You are not a good boy!”

Joel’s pace was so fast that his cock, slipped out of you.

Both of your breaths were heavy and difficult; you were looking into each other's eyes and saw the same thing: satisfaction.

“Holy shit, your tight little pussy, almost made me cum, city boy!” Joel chuckles.

“Turn around, baby.”

You complied with what Joel told you to do; you got off Joel’s lap and turned around; you didn't need to listen to your head right now. All you knew was that your ass was hovering over Joel’s thick, throbbing cock.

Joel grabbed the base of his cock and started slapping it against your ass. “You want this dick, city boy?” Joel questioned.

Surprising Joel, you shoved Joel’s cock inside your ass hole. Joel was taken aback.

“OOOOH, GOOD BOY!” Joel exclaimed.

You slowly started to fuck yourself on Joel’s cock. It was thrilling, adrenaline-inducing. You were on the brink of exploding.

“C’mere baby,” Joel stated.

Joel wrapped his arms around your body to bring you closest to his. His hips were rocking up and down, and his pace was fast. His hands were wrapped around your chest, feeling your body as he enjoyed bringing you immense pleasure.

Your feet were on Joel’s bare, sweaty knees. His was hitting your G-spot again, and it felt indescribable. The feeling you never felt before would go away soon, and you hated that, at this moment, you felt suitable for the first time in so long.

“Who’s my good boy?” Joel growls in your ear.

“Me, Joel. I AM,” You hiss between your teeth.

One of his hands found its way to your throat, lightly choking you.

“You love this big dick inside you? Huh, baby?”

“I love it so much, Joel.”

That's when Joel wanted to go rough with you some more. He removes his hand from your throat and grips your thighs, and lifts them so that your back connects with his slightly covered — sweaty chest.

His dick would hurt when you woke up in the morning, but for now, you were feeling pleasure.

Joel was rough, and he knew that your face was close to his, and you could see the rage and determination, and it turned you on even more.

Your cock was slapping against your navel, and your pre cum string was slapping against your stomach. Your left hand gripped Joel’s covered shoulder while your right hand was on the back of the couch.

You could feel Joel’s cock pulsating inside you. You could think that he was close.

“Your so needy, city boy, feelin’ my bulge like that,” Joel grunted.

“Shut up. . .” You thought

“You're taking this thick cock so well,” Joel growled.

“Please, Joel, stop talking; I won't control myself if you keep talking.”

“You love this cock inside of you, don't you?Pounding that tight little pussy of yours.

“YESSS,” You spat.

“You're a filthy whore!”

“Joel! JOEL!” You exclaimed.

“FILTHY WHORES NEED TO SHUT THE FUCK UP!”

That's when you listened to your head and did the unthinkable. You kissed Joel Miller.

A married Joel Miller, not a simple peck on this lips too—a sloppy, slobbery, open-mouth kiss. Joel slipped his tongue in your mouth as the kiss got rough and passionate. You can feel Joel pumping his cock inside of you faster as he takes his mouth off yours.

“Joel, you’re going to make me cum!” You moaned.

“Cum for me, baby!” Joel breathed.

Joel’s hands made your legs spread apart, and he was pumping his cock rough and slow.

“I’m going to cum, in that tight pussy of yours, city boy,” Joel growled.

“Yes, Joel, fuck —mpfm—, I want that load inside me!”

Joel started to get faster again. As he was, you were about to cum; Joel’s hips were on the brink of exploding if he didn't cum soon. This feeling, this experience, would end with a lust-filled bang.

“I’m cumming, I’M CUMMING!!” You exclaim as white lines of cum shoot out on your stomach.

“FFF— FUCK, ME TOO!” Joel growled.

You could feel his cum inside of you slowly start falling out of you, and Joel’s body started to jolt.

Joel kissed your lips with more passion than hunger like before. You both were drenched in sweat, spit, and now cum. This night was something you didn't want to forget.

You feel your body raised from Joel’s hard chest. Then you notice Joel is picking you up bridal style.

“Not yet, city boy, we’re not done yet,” Joel growled. His eyes turn dark as he walks upstairs with you in his arms.

Joel pushes the bedroom door with his foot; once he sees the bed, he places you down on the bed — on your back.

He’s in between your legs with a grin spread across his face, which shows he has more ways to pleasure you. With your ass hanging over the edge of the bed, Joel places tender kisses on your thighs.

Your spine shivered with how soft his kisses felt on your legs, your calves feeling cold to Joel’s warm lips kissing them. He trailed the kisses down towards the back of your knees, down to your thighs.

Your mind was going into shock at how soft Joel was being. A few minutes ago, he was fucking your brains out, and now he’s tenderly kissing your legs. And now you didn't know what to —

You gasped in awe and enjoyment as Joel’s mouth reached your hole. His tongue was swirling around like he was licking a lollipop. You gripped the gray bedsheets next to you and tried your best to hide your moans.

“Mmmhm, city boy, If I knew you’d tasted this good, I would’ve eaten you out sooner,” Joel exclaimed.

Your hands found their way to your face. You wanted to moan but this would validate that you were ready for him but you wanted to see what —

You yelped as a hard and fast slap came to your balls; you knew Joel was trying to force a moan out of you with his rules.

“C’mon, city boy, I can tell you're enjoying this. Moan for me, baby,” Joel breathed.

Your body betrayed you, and you moaned per Joel’s command. Your body was on overdrive, and it felt immensely addicting.

“That's right, baby; moan for me.”

Your moans kept slipping from your lips, and you enjoyed every second of it. Joel’s hands traveled all over your knees, thighs, and stomach.

His touch felt devilish, addicting. It felt like you depended on his hands, mouth, and cock to fill this overstimulating you had.

“You ready for this cock again, city boy?” Joel asked.

You nodded, and your breaths came out as moans prepared for his cock once again.

Joel stood up from his knees, and that's when you see Joel’s cock. Throbbing, pre cum leaking from the slit. Minutes ago, that cock had cum shooting inside you; it should’ve been soft at that moment.

But his cock looked like it was before the whole situation started; hard, throbbing, begging to cum.

Joel catches your eyes as your are shocked at his massive length.

“Impressive, huh?”

You reflexively nod your head in hunger, his cock will be inside you again, and you can't wait.

Joel lowers his face to kiss you. His hand travels to your throat as he lightly tightens his grip around your neck. You gasp, and Joel sticks his tongue in your mouth. Joel’s moans were quiet, but you could hear them, even with the shuffling of sheets.

“You ready for round two, city boy?”

He kisses you before you get to answer.

“Yes, yes, Joel, I am.”

Joel backs up from your face, and you crawl backward to have your head on top of the pillows below you.

Joel shrugs his flannel off his shoulder and crawls over you. His face inches from yours, his tanned bare chest hovering away from your bare chest.

He adjusts his cock, and you can feel it press up against your hole. Joel slowly slides his cock inside you. You exclaim in pain, but you can't help but feel pleasure all at the same time.

Your legs are over Joel’s shoulder as he starts slow and then goes faster. Your moans were bouncing over the bedroom that Joel and Adaline shared.

This feeling was unbearable, but you didn't care. The pleasure was worth it.

“How do you get so fuckin’ tight, baby boy,” Joel growled.

Joel’s eyes darkened; that same look of rage and determination was back on his face. Heavily breathing through his teeth and you gripping his shoulders so hard, you could make crescent moon shapes on his shoulders.

“Joel! Oh my fucking god, I love this so much!” You yelled.

“I love it when you talk dirty, city boy.”

“Your tight pussy doesn't want to let go of my cock. I’m fuckin’ obsessed with it,” Joel breathed.

Joel wraps his forearms around your legs, making your calves close to his ears. You exclaim in pleasure as he’s fucking you this rough again.

This feeling: It was more than an addiction, a sense; it was indescribable. This immense pleasure you’ve never felt before, and you loved everything.

“J-Joel, slow down; you not gonna last if you go so fast,” You breathed.

“I can't help it, city boy. This tight ass needs my cock. I can tell you need it; I’m going crazy, baby.”

“I- love it, Joel. Just slow down for a second.”

With that, Joel’s hips started to slow down, he was on the brink of coming, but he didn't care. He just wanted you to feel something: Good, lustful, ecstatic, wanted.

He closed his eyes and kissed you as he could feel your heart almost exploding. He let go of your calves as Joel’s hands were beside your head.

His hips started the pace again. He was pumping like he was on a mission. He didn't want to stop this time; he wanted to cum, inside you to show you that you were his, no one else's.

“Ugh, fuck Joel, your seriously going to break me!” You clenched your teeth.

“That’d be the idea, baby. Your mine, no one else’s,” Joel growled.

You couldn't tell if it was the alcohol in your system or just your mind, but you understood when Joel said you were his and no one else’s.

You hated/loved how much that turned you on.

“City boy, I’m going to cum, again. Are you ready?”

“Yes, Joel, pump your hot cum inside of me.”

Joel clenched his teeth so hard one could out from his gums. His hands were gripping your thighs; they could cause bruising.

Your mind was blanking out as Joel was speeding the pace in his hips even more.”

“Fuck, baby, I’m coming!” Joel yelled.

With one thrust, two, and three thrusts, Joel’s cum shot inside you again. You could feel the warm liquid sit inside you. Joel’s forehead had beads of sweat covering it. He leaned down and kissed your lips softly.

“You’re gonna stay the night, and I don't want anyone to see the pleasure I gave you tonight. That’s for my eyes only.”

You nodded, having no other words to say. Joel slips his cock out of you and lays down next to you, breathing heavily. Your head finds his chest, over his heart. You can hear how fast his heart is pumping. You were so exhausted that you fell asleep on Joel’s sweaty chest.

tags: @evans55 @odetodilfs @jrrmint <would lose it @groggygrogu @ihugpedro @strang3lov3 <would lose it

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should-be-sleeping · 1 year

Text

Tough day today... and friendly reminder that being human is easier when we help each other.

I saw one of our neighbors, an older woman we sometimes talk to in passing, sitting outside of her house. I don't know what exactly made me look twice, but on second glance as we drove by I realized her walker was in the grass. She was otherwise just sitting there, like she had a thousand times before, so it would have been easy to assume she was fine and go on with my life as normal but something told me to go check in on her anyway.

She was not fine. She was the polar opposite of fine. Just diagnosed with terminal cancer not fine. No next of kin not fine. A veteran facing eviction from her house for missing rent while in the hospital not fine. In constant debilitating pain not fine. Only semi-lucid not fine. She was extremely alone not fine.

I thought, at most, she might be bored while unable to pick up her walker not fine. A five minute detour from my day not fine. A help her back into her house and say "see you later!" not fine. Instead I spent the last three hours with her because she was so scared and alone and no one should be alone.

We talked a lot while I was there. She's actually two years younger than my mom (who also has cancer but slightly better luck, I guess). I helped her into her house and got her a drink and we talked about what all is going on with her. None of it was good. I was as reassuring as I could be, but there's only so much of this I can actually help her with.

"Why did you come?" she asked through tears.

"Because you looked like you might need some help."

She called me an angel. I told her I was just doing my best. I told her that kindness should never be rare. That we should all try to make the world just a little bit better than it was.

She offered to pay me but I told her I was just there as a friend. Before today we were basically strangers. No need to repay me with anything other than her company, I assured her. She cried, a lot. I managed not to somehow. Something tells me she had needed to cry long before this but in being Strong she never had the chance to.

She needed to get her mail, which is a long walk when you're disabled because it is not at all handicap accessible (across a parking lot, over a bridge, across a small field). So I helped her get her mail. We stopped every three feet because her pain was so bad, but she was determined to be able to go do this with me and not just send me on an errand. I patiently stayed with her and reminded her, through her apologies, it was fine to take our time: there was a nice breeze and birds were singing. She appreciated this. She loves nature.

Halfway back she said she wanted to go to the pool. To put her feet in the water. She loves water, and has not been able to even see the pool in a month. Neither of us were dressed for swimming, but I took her to the pool anyway. There is a stair leading down to it, meaning she couldn't bring her walker, so I offered her my arm.

We went to the pool. She put her feet in the water and then, with more energy and enthusiasm than I'd seen the whole time, she jumped in. In her fancy dress! She was instantly ten years younger at least, clear and happy, floating in the sun. Dress and all. She grew up with a pool and had been on a swim team.

I sat by the edge of the pool while she swam, keeping her company and also making sure she was okay. When she got tired I took her back home and then had to help her get undressed and redressed. I made sure she felt no shame. Getting out of wet clothes is hard for anyone, let alone someone with like twenty pounds of tumors racking them with constant pain.

She was so fucking happy to have gone swimming.

She is trying to "make everything right" before she goes. Trying to repay her debt to society and her debts in general. She couldn't understand why the corporation that owns our houses wouldn't take her money. She was genuinely distressed -- not to be homeless on her deathbed but to not leave this world with a clean slate. I told her intent matters. She can only do her best.

This company not letting her repay her debt was their fault, not hers.

When I finally needed to go, I told her to let me know any time she needed a hand or just wanted company. She told me she was going to die tonight. I told her I hoped not, so I could see her tomorrow. I offered her a hug, we hugged and she sobbed for a solid ten minutes into my shoulder. I told her she was okay. That it was okay.

When I got home I cried myself, because I could not believe she was going through all of that alone. I cannot even imagine how isolated she must have felt. Once I pulled myself back together I sent her a text reminding her to reach out any time and I'd do my best to come over. Like, any time at all.

I hope she is here tomorrow.

#choose kindness #existing helps #if we exist together #life #read more

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the-record · 11 months

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kissing lessons: 2

synopsis: ellie was your first kiss, but she moved away and you never spoke again. what happens when she moves back to town ten years later?

song: kissing lessons - lucy dacus

pairing: college!ellie x reader

warnings: mean moms, implied homophobia

a/n: uhm wow thank you so much for all the love the first part 🫶 yall are angels and i love u all! thinking this is a series!!!!!!

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4

“damn. you grew up.”

you laughed, coming over and pulling ellie into a hug. “so did you, jesus.” you let go of her and joel pulled you into a hug of his own. “hi mr. miller.”

“jesus kid, how many times do i have to say not to call me that! its joel.”

the air was awkward as you pulled away from them both, memories of your childhood floating through your mind. “so, uhm, what are y’all doing back here? thought you wanted to be close to tommy?”

joel sighed and leaned on the cart he had been pushing. “yea, well, ellie wanted to go to school here.”

“they’ve got a great art program.” ellie interrupted. “didn’t think id get in, but i did on a scholarship, so we decided to come back.”

you smiled at her. “wow that’s amazing, you’ll have to show me your stuff some time!”

“absolutely, shes amazing.” joel said, throwing an arm around her shoulder. “what about you, are you still in school?”

you sighed and switched your basket to the other hand. “unfortunately, last year though!” you smiled.

“thats the spirit.” joel pat you on the shoulder. “we better get going, but it’s good to see you angel. hope we get to see more of you.” he turned back to the cart, looking at the list as he headed down the cereal aisle.

ellie cleared her throat before speaking again. “hey, can i get your number? y’know so we can catch up?”

“yeah, of course!” she slipped her phone into your hands, watching as you added your number to a new contact. “it’s really good to see you.” you said as you put your free arm around her neck in a hug.

“yea it is.” her arm squeezed your middle for a moment before you both let go, heading opposite ways. “see you around angel.”

“what’s got you so smiley?” your mom wondered as she chopped vegetables beside you.

you set down the knife your were holding, turning around to lean on the counter. “you remember ellie? the girl i was, like, best friends with in elementary school?” she nodded, her eyes flashing between you and the onion. “saw her and mr. miller at the grocery store. i guess they’re moving back so ellie can go to school here.”

she hummed, no reaction on her face. “will you get the chicken out the fridge for me?” she looked up when you didn’t move, just staring at her. “what?”

“you tell me.”

she sighed and set down her knife, getting the chicken herself. “i just… i never liked that girl.” she closed the fridge door and cut open the chicken, putting it in a bowl with some seasoning. “mr. miller is very kind, and his sarah is a sweetie.” she clicked her tounge. “but ellie seemed to be a bad influence on you. something off about that girl.”

you knew exactly what she meant.

ellie was a trouble maker. back-talking teachers, and pranking neighbors. and she was never the girly-girl the moms wanted her to be. too tomboy-ish for their daughters.

too queer for them.

“whatever.” you left the kitchen, grabbing your keys and walking out the front door like you used to all those years ago. you heard your mom call out for you as you left, but you ignored her, getting in your car and pulling away.

ellie had texted you earlier to give you her number, claiming she was always free.

e: hey angel its ellie 3:48

a: hey. glad i saw you today. 3:52

a: when are you free? 3:52

e: always 3:54

a: u free now??? 5:36

e: yea come over 5:36

e: sent a pin 📍 5:37

ellie raced down the stairs as you knocked on the door, yelling at joel “i got it” before he could get up.

he laughed and turned back to the tv. she’d done that as a kid too, never more excited than when you came over. she composed herself before unlocking and opening the door, a shy smile on her face.

“hey, come in.” she stepped back, watching you come inside and slide off your shoes along side hers. she took your hand, a habit she never dropped, and led you upstairs to her room.

“hey angel!”

you smiled softly, peeking around a corner and seeing joel watching the news. “hi mr. miller.”

“it’s joel!”

ellie rolled her eyes, pulling at your arm. you scoffed, letting her guide you. “now, my room is just bones right now. im only here temporarily so…”

she wasn’t joking.

her bed frame sat against a wall not put together, all her stuff in boxes. a suitcase sat by the closet with clothes and essentials. her mattress tucked in a corner with sheets and a pillow. walls bare and books hidden.

“this is boring.” you teased as you flopped onto her mattress face first. when you looked over to ellie she was standing awkwardly at the door, hands at her sides and eyes on the floor. “what the hell are you doing?”

she shrugged, shuffling forward. “ ‘don’t know. feels weird.”

you laughed, staring at her incredulously. “you just yanked me up your stairs to your room, and now it’s weird?”

“you’re right.” she stood at the foot of the mattress before falling on top of you.

“jesus!”

ellie gasped and rolled off you. “do not say the lord’s name in vain missy! can you imagine what your mother would do if she heard?”

she felt the energy sour at the mention of your mom. “you okay?”

she watched as you sat up and followed suit, sitting criss cross in front of you. “i hate living with her. she finds a way to ruin everything.” you picked at the hole on your jeans, pulling at the white threads.

“let me guess,” ellie said, leaning onto her hands behind her. “not so happy to hear im back in town.” you looked at her with a guilty expression. “she never liked me. none of the moms did.”

“yea, well, theyre all idiots.” you huffed and picked at her jeans instead. “she just… any time im excited she has to find a way to ruin it. i just wanna move out.”

you were both silent for a minute. ellie watched as you picked and twisted the the strings on her pants, separating them just to pinch them back together. “move in with me.”

your head shot up to look at her.

#��kissing lessons💋#ellie williams x female reader #ellie williams x you #ellie williams fluff #ellie williams fic #ellie willams the last of us #ellie williams tlou #ellie the last of us #ellie williams x y/n #ellie williams angst #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams

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totalswag · 1 year

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still mine — RAFE CAMERON

authors note i would be so down to party with rafe (besides the coke) writing fics about parties is fun because i can put in sfuff i’ve either seen or experienced at the parties i’ve gone too. this is really long so be prepared. feedback is always appreciated <3

summary topper is throwing a party at his house one weekend invites you and your two best friends. you see someone staring at you from a distance which happens to be rafe cameron. the two of you have history together and hadn’t seen each other for two months. what happens when you finally see each other.

warnings drinking, smoking, kissing, swear words, implied smut at the end

Considering it's the weekend, there will be a party tonight. Tonight will be Topper Thorton's party. Everyone comes to his parties; once word gets out, you can bet they'll be full. His parents are on the main island for the weekend, so he's taking advantage.

Every weekend, there are parties on the Outer Banks. Taking advantage of being plastered and having the party shut down by the cops because the neighbors complained about the noise.

You were walking out the door to your car when you felt your phone buzz in your purse. Topper texted you about his party and wanted you to come if you didn’t have anything later. Of course you said you would come and get drunk.

When you got into work, you went in the back to put your personal stuff in your locker, then clocked in. You work at the local shoe store in town that’s very popular. Your two best friends, Sophie and Aubrey work with you too.

You met Aubrey and Sophie in English freshman year of high school. Sat in the same row the whole year and everyday you three joked and talked about the craziest things. Your friendship grew and grew.

The three of you were in the back organizing the shoe boxes before the store opened. They told you about the party before you could tell them.

“I was gonna tell you guys but you beat me to it” you laughed, putting the shoe’s in the box.

“You know how fast word spreads here, Y/N.” Aubrey states, leaning over you on the stool, putting a shoe box in the open space.

“Yeah, you got a point there” you place both hands on your hip, backing up.

“Plus we get to have fun tonight” Sophie states.

You three laugh in agreement and get back to work.

Eight hours later, the three of you were getting ready at your house. The party doesn't start until ten thirty, giving you plenty of time to prepare for the long night ahead. Aubrey and Sophie only came to your place because you live five houses down from Topper.

While you three did your makeup in the bathroom, your outfits were put out on the bed. Tonight, you're wearing a black crop top tee with gray loose cargo pants that show off your beautiful curls, which you've curled with gold jewelry to make your outfit pop.

Sophie brought buzz balls from the local liquor store to prepare. Usually, one of you will buy drinks before the party and then drink more at the party. You jugged the buzz balls together after changing into your outfits.

“Alright, let’s get fucked up tonight” you exclaimed with a smile.

When you walked up the street to Toppers, loud music from the inside of the house could be heard from outside. There was a large group of girls pulling up at the same time– you girls have never seen them before. It sounded like water splashing from the pool in the backyard.

Your nose was immediately filled with the smell of weed. Music filled the entire place, and you had to talk-yell to be heard. People passing around bottles and then pouring them into their mouths.

The girls nodded and followed closely behind you as you said, "Let's find drinks in the kitchen."

A broad range of drinks were available in the kitchen's fridge and on the counter. With Aubrey and Sophie joining you in getting your second drink of the night, you three were prepared to get shitfaced.

The sound of drunk Topper's voice saying, "Well well, look who finally arrived at the party" comes from behind you. He is shirtless, his arms are open, and he is holding a drink in his left hand.

It doesn't surprise you that Topper is already drunk at his own party because it has happened frequently before.

“Drunk already?” While hugging him, you laughed.

He nods slowly, "yeah, I am, but I'll be fine by the end of the night, trust me," he smiles with his teeth, aware that he is lying to himself but plays it off.

"Whatever you say, Topper," Aubrey replies as she walks by him, touching his shoulder and pointing to the dance floor.

"We'll see you around, Topper," you remark as you walk out of the kitchen.

When you walk by the back door that leads to the balcony, you can sense someone looking at you. Your gut wants you to double-check before it's too late. You can't tell who it is because of all the people surrounding you.

“Who are you looking at?" Aubrey asked, puzzled, while glancing in the same direction as you.

"I think that's Rafe staring at you," she says bluntly.

"This can't be happening to me," you mutter as you brush your fingers through your hair.

Rafe Cameron and you have a history together. Last summer, you met at a Halloween party and that was the first time you met officially. You guys hung out with friends a couple times after hooking up here and there. You last spoke with him two months ago, following an altercation he sparked about this guy flirting and touching you at this party.

You were obviously upset with Rafe for what he did to the poor guy, he meant no harm. You decided to end hooking up with Rafe because you didn’t want this fighting guys continuing. There’s times where you think of him or see his posts on social media, he looks really good.

"Hey, don't think about him. "We came here to have some fun and possibly not remember this night in the morning," Sophie said, assuring you.

"You're right, let's go party," you move your body to shake off the negativity.

It's been an hour and all you can think about is how much fun you're having. To the beat of the music, bodies dance up on each other. With the weed and alcohol in your system, your body feels like it's on cloud nine.

One of your friends brought his weed to the party and asked if you three wanted to have a little smoke sesh. Of course you all said yes.

You looked over your shoulder and saw Aubrey and Sophie dancing on these guys; they seemed to be having a good time. On the other hand, you were having fun in your own world.

When the song changed, you could feel your hips swaying to the beat of the music. Aubrey and Sophie, who were still with the boys, encouraged you and made you grin.

Everyone in the room appeared to be enjoying themselves. You were amazed that the cops hadn't yet arrived at the house. When parties are thrown, it is common for neighbors to call the cops, but as the parties kept coming back they gave up.

"I'm going to get another drink; I'll be right back," you say to the girls. They tell you to be careful.

You pushed your way past the mob to the balcony, where there were cold drinks. Humming to the sound of music playing from inside. When you stroll past a couple girls you remember from school, they smile and wave.

You rummaged through the Truly's, Mike's, and Smirnoff's in the cooler in hopes to find one that would catch your eye. You made the decision to choose Smirnoff.

When Kelce notices you looking in the cooler, he calls you over to the group who are already seated. Kelce stands up from his chair to hug you.

"Y/N, how are you doing?" He asks. You haven't seen Kelce in a while, but he always treats you well when you talk with him.

"I've been busy with work and apartment search. How about you? You respond openly before taking a sip of your drink.

“How's it going? And juggling work and school," he chuckles, shaking his head.

You shrug your shoulders and say, "Honestly not that easy, but I think I found a place I'm thinking of applying at."

The conversation went on for another ten minutes and you excused yourself from the group and went back inside. The whole time you were wondering where Rafe was because he’s usually outside with Kelce or Topper.

You walk through the crowded area as you enter the loud house. You ran into a strong chest by accident, and they smelled great. It turned out to be Rafe Cameron, who is already staring down at you as your eyes wander up.

Your jaw dropped in your drunken state.

He looked so good in his gray pants with a plain black t-shirt with his gold chain that fits perfectly around his neck. He changed his hair, it looks really good.

"Long time no see, Y/N," he says bluntly, grinning as he slowly places his hands on your waist, pulling your body closer to him. You can smell the mixture of cologne, weed and alcohol on him too.

"Hi Rafe," is all you could say as you looked down at his hands on your hips, slightly blushing at his hand placement but attempting to cover up your redness.

He chuckles.

“You look beautiful,” he compliments.

“Thank you, you don't look bad yourself, Cameron” you remark.

For a few moments, you two have a small conversation. As he opens his mouth, you take a long sip of your drink, knowing in your gut that he's going to say something interesting.

“I’m sorry about what happened. I should’ve never acted the way I did” Rafe says with an apologetic look.

You bite your bottom lip, nodding your head, trying to process what he said in your drunk state. You accept that he is apologizing but he could be talking out of his ass as you two speak honestly. Won't forget what he did though. You felt too drunk to be talking to him about this right now too.

"I appreciate your apology, but as you can see, I'm drunk, like really drunk, so talk to me in a few days about this," you pat his chest with your right palm, trying to walk away from him because you really didn’t feel like dealing with him tonight.

Rafe nods, "Wanna dance though?" He leans down and whispers into your ear.

Chills run down your spine by the way he whispers. You make eye contact with him, nodding in approval.

You hate that he still has that effect on you no matter what he does or says.

He leads you into the dance floor, turning your body so your back is against his front and running his hands down your sides towards your hips. You lean back into his chest, your hips swaying to the beat of the music.

When Sophia and Aubrey hear a few guys chanting Rafe's name on the dance floor, they quickly turn their heads, assuming you're with him.

The tension between Rafe and you grows quickly. As you continue dancing, you can’t help but grin at the fact you two have each other wrapped around both your fingers. His firm grip on your hips don’t leave your body, his lips attached themselves to your neck, leaving soft kisses.

You know you shouldn't be doing this but in your drunken state, you want to do this.

“Let’s go somewhere else, yeah?” Rafe whispers.

You stop your movements, turning around facing him, confused but curious at the request.

He sighs, “up there” pointing up at the ceiling, indicating a room.

Rolling your eyes, agreeing.

You look over your shoulder, scanning the room for Sohpie and Aubrey who are nowhere to be found. You start to worry, you go to the group chat but they text you saying they’ll wait for you and be with the guys they met.

You walk in front of Rafe till you find the guest room.

The room was dark.

You sat on the edge of the bed, hands on your lap, as Rafe turned on the lamp on the nightstand next to the bed.

Rafe leans in front of you, his hands on your now-partially separated thighs. You glance up with doe eyes, anticipating his next move. He can't help but notice your plumped lips and then your eyes as he realizes what game you're about to play with him.

The game is simple: you tease him by giving him doe eyes, tilting your head to the side, and saying things that make him wonder if you're serious about what's going to happen. You like to add sarcastic comments here and there. Usually, he fails and you win.

"You look so fuckin' hot right now," he exhales, "you know you're killing me, Y/N."

"You think I'm hot?" "Am I on fire or what?" You make a sarcastic remark.

"You think this is funny now, huh?" He hates it when you make sarcastic remarks to him.

You don't give a damn. So you keep going.

"I know, I know, I'm quite the jokester," you say, smirking and biting your lower lip.

Rafe doesn't want you to win, but he knows you will regardless. He knew there was something about you that had him hooked the moment he laid eyes on you. He realizes what he did was wrong, and the two months of not communicating or seeing you destroyed him.

“You wanna keep it up with the sarcastic jokes and laugh?” His voice is stern, almost as if he was ready to pin your hands over your head and take you there.

"And what if I want to keep it going?" You can feel his body tense up as you drag your hand below his t-shirt and play with his lower stomach.

"Oh, I think you know what's about to happen," he says before he smashes your lips together, catching you off guard.

Before you know it, clothes taken off, touching, heavy breathing and moans filled the guest room.

my taglist 🧚🏼‍♀️

if you would like to be added to my taglist let me know!!

@runningfrom2am @winterrrnight @brooklynscherry-z @kaydsr3venge

#rafe cameron #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron fanfic #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron fluff #rafe cameron imagines #rafe cameron x you #rafe cameron smut #rafe cameron x kook!reader #rafe cameron x female reader #rafe cameron x y/n #rafe obx #outerbanks rafe #drew starkey #drew starkey x reader #drew starkey imagine #drew starkey fanfiction #outer banks fanfiction

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sunflowervoltwentyeight · 4 months

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Happy 28th! Here is my May 2024 fic rec, organized by word count, from longest to shortest. You can view my other fic recs here. Enjoy!

We Were Such Fools by kiddle / @bluejeanlouis (98k)

Rule #1: The Rewind Machine cannot be used to change the past, only to experience it. History will reset itself to the original timeline every 24 hours.

On his fiftieth birthday, two things are consuming Harry’s mind: what he’s going to make the kids for dinner tonight, and the fact that his marriage is crumbling at his feet.

So, when his best friend gifts him the trip of a lifetime, Harry chooses to venture off to the summer that set his life on its course—all the way back in 1987, California.

It only took him one summer to fall in love with his husband the first time around. How hard could starting all over really be?

Once Bitten and Twice Shy Series by pinkcords / @pinkcords (60k)

once bitten and twice shy (19k) This time as his stomach rolls, there’s no doubt about it. He’s going to vomit. And if he does, it’ll be on Louis’ shoes, a nice little parting gift to go with the embarrassment he’s caused the both of them. “I’m gonna throw up,” he says just as Louis turns to look at him, blue eyes swimming with shock and confusion, and asks, “Is that true?” Or, in a rush of bravery only senior year can bring, Harry confesses his feelings in a letter to his neighbor and best friend, Louis, only for the entire school to hear it and laugh him out of their small town in Wisconsin. Ten years later, Harry's a successful lawyer at Columbia Records, coming home for Christmas for the first time since he departed for college. He plans to work his way through the trip, eat his mom's cooking, and avoid everyone from his past for as long as possible. The only problem is best laid plans hardly ever go as intended. These Stars Will Guide Us Home (41k) And then he’s gonre. Harry watches him take off his shoes, sort his belongings into bins, and keeps watching until he vanishes entirely, around the corner to his gate. Louis doesn’t look back and Harry can’t blame him, certain his expression, body language, entire being would implore him to stay. It would just make it more difficult on both of them. Louis’ always been intuitive like that, strong enough to make the hard decisions that protect both of them. Or Harry lives in New York and Louis lives in Wisconsin.

Cabin Fever by germericangirl / @germericangirl (46k)

“What the fuck is he doing here?“ He asked still looking at him, before he turned back to look at Niall for an answer.

Niall’s mouth fell open and he looked at him with wide eyes "He um changed his mind?“

Harry stared at Niall for a few seconds in silence, before grabbing a bag and walking towards a bedroom without looking at anyone else, slamming the door shut behind himself.

Liam flinched in front of Louis.

“Well I’m happy to see you too.“ Louis mumbled, some of the tension leaving his body. This wasn’t exactly how he thought their first meeting would go. It was quiet for a moment before Louis finally spoke up “Did you seriously not tell him I was coming?“

Or:

One cabin, one bed, two ex-boyfriends. What could possibly go wrong?

You, In Every Color by blueskiesrry / @blueskiesrry (38k)

But then he thinks of the soft curves and sharp angles he had imagined when he first drew up the sketches for the collection, the specific green of fabric he had picked with the thought of how they’d saturate green eyes, the glossy silks and soft velvets he had once pictured sitting delicately against milky skin.

“We’re drunk,” Louis decides on a sigh. “We shouldn’t make any drastic decisions now.”

or: fashion designer louis and his model bf harry have vowed to never work together again, but with the show for louis’ first solo line on the horizon, they decide to give it another shot

We'll Be Alright by ShatteredGlassHouse / @larryislove (36k)

"Lou, I know this-"

"Not plan? Of course, this wasn't planned. Harry, this can't be happening. We can't have a kid. We are not even supposed to be sleeping together."

Harry flinched at Louis' words. He was right, but Louis didn't need to be blunt about it.

"I'm not ready to have kids. I said that when we started this… Relationship," Louis stuttered the last word, trying to find the proper wording.

"Do you think I am? I'm not even twenty-four. You are almost twenty-nine! You're at the age where most people start a family."

"Doesn't mean I want to have one!" Louis snapped.

"Well, it's happening," Harry said, trying to keep his voice calm.

"Be serious, Harry. We can't have a baby. If people find out, you'll be fired."

Harry subconsciously wrapped his arms around his middle. He suddenly felt small. He didn't expect Louis to be excited. This wasn't the best news for their situation, but he thought he'd be happy.

"I know, Louis."

Or Louis is the Captian of Liverpool FC and Harry is one of the team's physiotherapists. They have a secret relationship going but things become complicated when Harry finds out he's pregnant.

Host of a Name by Signofcomfort / @signofcomfort (35k)

Louis leaves the band in the middle of the tour and drops off the face of the earth. Five years later, they might have a chance to meet him. Harry can finally have some answers and tell the truth for the first time.

Cabin on the Bluff Series by juliusschmidt / @juliusschmidt (6k)

Beech Tree in Autumn (1k) Louis walks forward. Harry walks back. And back. And back. Off the two track, through the brush, until his heel bangs against the trunk of a tree. Louis presses further still. Without so much as a, 'hello,' he's kissing Harry, hard and hungry. Mosquito Bites and Cheap Beer (2k) Harry’s careful not to look at Louis as he plays. At least, he starts out that way. But then the sky behind Louis begins to shift, clouds morphing from piles of gold-tinged wool to scoops of pink and orange sherbet. And at some point, Harry forgets-- forgets not to watch. And when he catches himself, it’s fine. Louis’ watching him right back. Sandwiches on the Shady Shore (2k) “You don’t have to do this,” Louis says. It’s hot in the little kitchen, even with the windows open and a breeze blowing in. Harry feels a flush enfold him from the inside out. “I know,” he says. And then, because he’s already showed up embarrassingly early in the day and made Louis a cheese sandwich, he adds, “I wanted to.”

Trust Me to Take You Home by hattalove / @hattalove (4k)

“I made breakfast,” says Harry, and Louis can feel him smile where his face is smushed against Louis’s shoulder blade. “Full English. All for you.” Louis finally opens his eyes, and blinks. “What about the others?” “Asleep,” Harry whispers, “it’s five in the morning.”

or, a clichéd tale of two boys in love and their first valentine's day together.

#28th appreciation #may fic rec #monthly fic rec #larry fic rec #fic rec #hlcreators #read

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avoxrising · 9 months

Text

The Feral One • Epilogue

Finnick x Y/N

Series Masterlist Link

Prequel is coming in a few months! I haven’t made a Taglist yet and probably won’t start one till I’m closer to publishing. I’ll make a post tagging this series’ Taglist when I’m starting the next one.

Content Warnings - Mentions of fertility issues/miscarriage; death; the end of this series (don’t worry it’s a good ending imo)

Dear Brielle,

A lot has happened in seventeen years. I’ve now lived half of my life without you, mom, and dad. I’ve been thinking about you a lot so my husband Finnick (yes that Finnick lol) said I should write you a letter of all the things I wanted to tell you but never could.

A little over ten years ago we killed President Snow. The districts rebelled and won. The war was brutal and there were times I nearly died, but Finnick pulled me through.

We got married a year later. We never really did the whole dating thing, our friendship just evolved into a beautiful romance overnight. He was there for me after you left and he has been here ever since.

The years since the war have not been easy. I’ve had bouts of seizures that leave me bedridden and ill for days. The doctors said my condition should be worse so I should be grateful. Countless medications and treatments have made slight improvements to my health but the pain will always be there.

Two years after our wedding we almost hit our breaking point. Finnick and I had been trying to start a family for over a year but nothing was working. It was the most frustrating experience of my life post-war and I do not wish those struggles on anyone.

Three years after our wedding, Mags passed of old age. Although we were sad, we were all glad she got to live out her last few years in a free Panem. Johanna decided to move in with Annie afterwards so she wouldn’t be alone. We are still neighbors to this day.

Four years after our wedding, I got pregnant, only to lose the baby a few months in due to a bad seizure. This was Finnick and I’s lowest point to date.

It’s now been a bit over 9 years since I married the love of my life and the father of my child. We were finally blessed with a baby boy, Neptune, 4 years ago today. He is everything I could have asked for in a child; rambunctious, kind, and adventurous. He looks just like his father but acts like his mother.

Two years ago, Neptune’s best friend arrived in District 4. Annie and Johanna adopted a little girl, Jodie, from District 7. Neptune and her do EVERYTHING together. Finnick keeps joking that we should build a tunnel between our two houses so the kids can hang out all the time.

All in all, it’s been a very painful 34 years of existence. Part of me is glad you didn’t have to witness what happened. The other part of me still hopes you’re out there, even though I know you aren’t. I hope that wherever you are, you’re at peace.

Love, your dear sister,

Y/N

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sungbeam · 1 year

Text

𝐜𝐢𝐫𝐜𝐥𝐞𝐬

nonidol!lee hyunjae x f!reader

6.7k words (my hand slipped, sorry), fluff, angst, low-key e2l, ex friends 2 implied lovers?, low-key rich kid au, swearing, drinking and drunk talks/crying, a shitty situation, a bitchy ex gf, uhh very low-key hurt/comfort?, lots of mentions of pizza and soft drinks, THE PLOT IS SO RUSHED IM SORRY I CRAMMED.

a/n: requests now closed! whew,,, what a doozy 😭 im sorry if it feels rushed bc it low-key really was such a rushed and ambitious plot on my part. to the anon who requested it, ik it's not exactly what u asked for and im sorry ><

The pizzeria was like your second home. Maybe it was your home, but you weren't sure if calling a pizza place your home was the best word. It acted as your bubble away from academic responsibilities, family obligations, and anything else you wanted to forget. For the past three years of your college career, you made this place your comfort spot, while also picking up some spare change.

Your friend and co-worker Dae bumped her hip with yours as she passed by you with her hands full of empty plastic cups to refill. "Your group of banshees just walked in," she mused, slipping past you to the fountain drink machine on the bar counter.

Your head perked up and watched the front door on the other side of the room open to let a wave of your friends in. Dae liked to joke that your friend group consisted of a bunch of "banshees" from how loud they could be. You couldn't blame her at all; it was hilariously accurate. On a bad night, the group's volume could reach levels of a nightmare baby being birthed from the Devil's anus.

"Yn-ie!" Chanhee and Jacob waved to you as the group of five made their way through the tight spaces between tables.

"Hey, guys," you greeted them. "You're so lucky a group just left." You nodded toward the circular table in the back corner where your friends often made their home. It was big enough to seat seven—ten, if you squished—but it was almost always for you and your friends.

The pizzeria's owner and your boss, Mr. Moretti, usually didn't mind your friends occupying the space. You were pretty sure he was glad your friends were hiding themselves away in the back. (Not because of the merriment, just because of the noise. Some customers just wanted pizza and a quiet night, and you could respect that.)

"Waitress! Waitress!" Changmin screeched, waving one of his hands around like a lunatic.

You came up to the table with an unimpressed look on your face, and Kevin wrestled his neighbor back into this seat. "Okay, so Changmin doesn't get to eat tonight," you drawled and braced your hands on the backs of Sunwoo and Chanhee's chairs.

"I was just wondering how long it takes for someone to get service around here," Changmin jested. He feigned one of those pompous brushes of his hair, mocking one of the rich pricks who had come in here last month thinking that the RIGHT TO REFUSE SERVICE sign didn't apply to him. Changmin broke into a lopsided grin at your arched brows. "What? I think I'm funny."

Your eyes widened in a silent 'Can you believe this guy?'

"He's sugar high because someone let him get to the cupcakes," Kevin directed his flat gaze to his counterpart, Jacob.

Jacob's hands lifted in innocence. "What? No one was eating them, and he said he was hungry."

"Okay, drinks, folks!" You clapped to regain their attention. You did, after all, have other customers. "What're we feeling tonight?"

A chorus of drink orders flew up into the air—coke, iced water, Sprite, lemonade—and you nodded, stepping away to grab them those very beverages. Your friends had all been here enough times to know exactly what was on the menu, so while you stepped away briefly for their drinks, they could deliberate and get back to you as soon as you returned.

Like a well oiled machine, you delivered them their drinks, and Kevin doled out the lineup for tonight.

"You know, I was thinking of painting my nails black," Kevin said as he finished off the order. He held his hand out in front of him, inspecting the state of his bare nails.

Sunwoo straightened in his seat. "We should do it together, hyung!—I mean… you could probably paint my nails. I dunno if you should trust me with one of those thin ass brushes."

"You're right," Chanhee chimed in, "we shouldn't."

You snickered to yourself as you left your friends to their own devices and pinned their order sheet to one of the clips hanging in the kitchen window. There was a set of plates set out on the window sill, the bill reading for table three, and you picked it up to take over to them. Dae appeared next to you, tightening her ponytail, and grabbed the dishes for table four right beside it.

With both your hands full, you departed to deliver your respective orders.

As you set the dishes off food down onto table three, you heard the telltale swish of the door opening, and night air flooded into the room. On instinct, you straightened with a smile to greet them. "Hi! Welcome—" your voice died on your throat, and when his eyes locked with yours, you stuttered, "—in. For how many?"

Lee Hyunjae brushed a hand through his blond hair, his other arm wrapped around the shoulders of a girl who was unfortunately familiar to you. A couple of the guys with him, you recognized, too, but he was the one who had made you trip over your words.

One of them with jet black hair and kind, feline-like eyes, lifted four of his fingers in a wordless signal.

You nodded, lips set in a firm line, and gestured to the open four-seater at table eight.

You tucked your empty tray beneath your arm, mentally thanking anyone who was listening that his party was seated in Dae's section and not yours. Thank god for odd numbers.

Dae was swift to chirp out her usual cheeriness to the newcomers, and you scurried back over to the register to cash a table's check. As you did so, your eyes flitted up toward Hyunjae's table. He glanced over at you periodically, looking away whenever you were already looking at him.

What the hell was he doing here? You wanted to yell, scream. Out of all the places, out of all the nights, out of all the times… how long had it been since you last saw him, you wondered to yourself as you let the bitterness seep into your bones and meld with the marrow. It was a feeling you knew all too well.

You strode over to table seven to set their check down on the edge of the table. Everything in the pizzeria was so close together; it was near impossible not to catch the words being exchanged at table eight.

"—don't understand why you chose this dump, Hyunjae." That was the girl, the one who's face made you want to throw something at it. Her name was Kyla, and the last time you saw her in person, she had just become Hyunjae's girlfriend.

Sometimes you questioned how they even managed to stay together so long, but then again, people like them deserved each other.

"Eric just wanted pizza, babe," drawled the blond, his arm casually draped over the back of her chair.

The two others seated at the table consisted of the man with jet black hair, and another with a medium-toned brown hair peeking out of a gray hoodie. The latter said, "You guys'll love this place! Their breadsticks are literally the fluffiest things in the world."

A smile curled onto your face at that comment. Now that you thought about it, you'd seen him around before.

You slid over to table one and began stacking the dirty dishes left behind by customers who had gone. Table eight's conversation continued.

"Is it normal to be able to see grease in the air?" Kyla gagged, her nose wrinkling in disgust. She soaked in the close quarters of the restaurant with little appreciation.

The other third wheel at table eight, the one with black hair, lifted his eyebrows. "It's cozy in here, Kyla."

"Yeah, just give it a chance," Hyunjae chimed in.

You brushed past their table to grab table seven's check and hustle it back over to the register. You met Dae at the counter, her hands once again full with cups that needed filling.

A grunt left her lips. "Table eight," she began.

"Yeah," you agreed. "Sheesh."

Her head turned to you over her shoulder. "You know 'em?"

"Unfortunately." You pursed your lips. "It's been awhile," you amended. "I only know the couple at the table—enough to say, good luck, girl."

Dae made a face, but she pulled her shoulders back to solidify her posture. You always admired her work ethic and her customer service skills. As fellow waitresses during many a dinner rush hour, you both had to deal with your own handfuls of difficult people. At this point, it wasn't difficult to sniff them out from a mile away. There were some days you just wanted them to yell at you and get it over with.

Just as Dae left to go drop off drinks, your friends' order hit the window sill. You tucked the finished bill for table seven into your apron pocket and grabbed the trays to set on the table for your friends.

"You look like you're about to gnaw my fingers off, Jacob," you teased with a twinge of nervousness.

The man grinned at you, with teeth. "I'm hungry."

"Valid." You backed away from the table, and the carnage began.

You laughed, ducking your head, as you left your friends to their feast. You arrived at table seven and wished them a good night—

"Do you not have cherry coke? Isn't that, like, a universal fountain drink?"

You glanced over to see Dae's mouth twitch just slightly, but gave nothing else away. "No, we only have regular Coke and Diet Coke; I said that earlier, miss."

Kyla stared at her as if she'd just gotten her puppy revoked. "But they both taste like ass."

"You can have a fruit punch instead," Dae offered.

"But I don't want fruit punch."

You saw that the other two boys at the table fidgeted nervously. They were making eyes at Hyunjae, urging him to do something.

He seemed to lift his gaze to yours at that exact moment and you wondered what he saw in them. Something shifted in him, a silent acceptance of surrender.

The next thing you knew, he was leaning into the conversation. "Ky, you can just get a water or something and then we'll go get a drink after this. How does that sound?"

She threw a look over at him. "I really just want a cherry coke, Hyunjae. If I have to be forced to eat at this place, then the least you could do is get me a cherry coke."

Okay, that was enough.

"Is there a problem here?" You asked, sidling up beside Dae. You saw her loosen up out of the corner of your eye.

Kyla opened her mouth to retort something, but she halted abruptly. Her head cocked to the side, eyes narrowing, like she was trying to figure something out. You knew the moment she recognized you. A slow smile curled onto her mouth. "Oh my god… Yn Ln. Mommy and daddy kick you out or something? Why are you working at this dump?"

You were certain your eye started twitching.

Hyunjae grappled her shoulder. "Kyla."

"This is gold," she chirped. "Wow, I didn't think anything good could come of this dinner, but—" she sneered, "wow. You look awful."

"Takes one to know one," you said with venom dripping from your words. "We have a right to refuse service, ma'am, so if you don't quit badgering my friend and me, then I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

She didn't seem to catch your drift. "No. Get me. A cherry coke."

You suppressed every urge to fuck this girl up. To Dae, you murmured, "Can you cover my tables?"

"For sure, girl," she said, giving you a reassuring clasp on the shoulder. "Should I call Moretti?"

"No, I think we should be fine—"

"Wait until I tell everyone I know about how absolute ass this place is," Kyla ripped you back out into reality. She had her phone out now, and Eric, the guy in the hoodie, was reaching across the table to stop her.

You weren't allowed to touch her, you reminded yourself. You could do this with just words. No matter how much it killed you to not sucker punch her stupid, pearly whites in. "I'm going to have to ask you to leave," you told her through gritted teeth. "Either you buckle down with your regular Coca-Cola, or you get out."

"How about—no."

All breath dissipated from your lungs when you felt the carbonated liquid dumped in your face, the blocks of ice just missing your eyes. The entire establishment seemed to freeze with you.

You scoffed, slowly wiping the soda from your eyes and shaking out your arms. You couldn't seem to form coherent speech.

"What the fuck is going on here?" You recognized Kevin's hardened voice behind you, his hand squeezing your shoulder to tell you he was here.

As Kyla and Kevin dueled it out, you found Hyunjae's eyes again. To his credit, he seemed horrified and apologetic, his mouth parted in shock. But then again, he didn't have much credit anymore in your book.

Your hands fisted. You wanted to yell at him to get out. It had been a decent evening, a good evening, before he and his like came in and threw a drink in your face.

You didn't want to address the burning bitterness that coursed beneath all the annoyance and anger—out of everything, why didn't he say anything? Why didn't he try harder to help you? Why was he with her when he could be with y—nevermind. That didn't matter.

Even now, your back still ached from when he'd last left it stabbed.

"Are you okay, Yn-ie?"

You realized that Hyunjae and his party had gone now, and the shop patrons were slowly going back to whatever they had been doing before. Chanhee appeared before you with a couple napkins from the dispenser on the table, and Dae rushed over with a massive roll of paper towels. Your other friends had flocked over, too, to help clean up and also attend to customers while you pulled your shit together.

You gave a nod, finding your voice to tell them so. Your gaze casted briefly toward the front door where you knew he wouldn't ever be stepping back into.

You told yourself that was a good thing.

It was late when you finally pushed out of the back doors of the pizzeria building. Your car was parked out back with many of the other employee cars; it was just a lot more convenient and a lot less traffic. It had been a couple days since the fiasco with Kyla and Hyunjae, and you hadn't heard or seen him once since then.

That was a good thing. It was supposed to be a good thing. After all, why would he suddenly reappear in your life now? What purpose or what significance did that have?

You were going to try and forget about him again. Your life was plenty good without him, and yet…

"Yn."

Speak of the Devil. You swore under your breath as you nearly tripped over the curb. His voice was haunting, as was his presence, his whole silhouette. You'd once found a home with all those things—with him.

You and he stopped beside your car. "What are you doing here?" You asked him.

Hyunjae had his hands shoved into the pockets of his leather jacket. "I, uhm," he began, "I wanted to say sorry."

"Sorry?" You parroted. The word was sticky in your mouth and it clung to all the wrong crevices.

"Yeah, for the other night." He clasped the back of his neck. "I… I broke up with her, by the way."

Your eyes widened at his words. He broke up with Kyla? A part of you wanted to pump the sky and jump up and down—finally. Fucking finally! But there was another part of you, the rational one, who yanked you back to Earth and smacked you in the head to think about it. Three years of dating that girl, and just now he decided to break up with her? What was the tipping point? There was no way he didn't know she acted like a spoiled brat all the time.

What was so good about her anyway? You thought you had understood at the time—she had more money, more connections. Her parents were old money rich, not entrepreneurs like yours. It was stupid to think that was the reason, and you couldn't afford to go down that rabbit hole of methodology again.

"So?"

Your singular word seemed to slap him in the face. "So? I—" Frustration flickered across his face for a split second. Now he knew how you felt.

You couldn't wait for him to say anything; you had so much to say to him. "Listen Jaehyun," you said plainly. "I don't know what you want from me. You broke up with your girlfriend? Good for you. You're sorry for the other night? Okay. I don't know if you expect me to grovel and praise you for owning up for once—"

"Okay, what?" He cut in. "First of all, I don't expect you to grovel or praise me or whatever. Second, what do you mean 'owning up for once?'"

"I mean it exactly like I said it." You clenched the strap of your bag in your hand. Crazy how your car was literally right next to you, but you couldn't get into it. Your feet were glued to the street, and a part of you wanted to know how this ended. "The last time I saw you, Kyla laughed in my face, and you encouraged her. You dropped me like our years of friendship meant jack shit to you. I don't know what you're trying to pull, Jaehyun, and I don't wanna know."

Hyunjae leaned his head back, eyes closed for a second. "Yn, it's so much more complicated than that."

You stuck your tongue in your cheek. "That's such bullshit, and you know it. You don't get to come back and tell me this." There was a shakiness in your voice now, and you knew you had to get going or risk yelling. "That's just not fair."

"I know it's not fair."

"Good."

"Fine," he bit out. "I don't even know why I'm here."

Your hand found purchase on the driver's side door. Say something. Give me a reason to stay. "Maybe your sense of guilt has finally returned and your brain wanted to make amends."

He rolled his eyes, and it felt like a stab in your chest. "I'm going to leave now."

"Thank god." The words tasted sour in your mouth and you realized that he hadn't given you a reason to stay; in fact, it had been the exact opposite.

You both went your separate ways again. When you clambered into your car and watched him walk away through your rear view, it dawned on you that the entire conversation had been one massive circle. You wanted to hear him out—of course, you did.

You used to know him, after all. You used to know him so well. And perhaps that was why you hadn't just now.

"We need to talk."

A pair of hands slammed down on your desk and you nearly fell out of your chair. You tugged your earbuds out of your ear to give whoever this was a piece of your—

You frowned. "Oh. It's you."

Hyunjae frowned back at you. He was wearing a jean jacket today, hair styled presentably. He didn't have to look so good in this lighting, but you supposed even the sun liked to favor him. "Yes, it's me. Can you get up so we can—" He nodded out toward the library window beside you, "—talk?"

"So you want us to jump out the window?"

"You are so annoying."

Your smile was saccharine. "Not as annoying as you."

It had currently been around fifteen hours since he showed up at the back alley to confront you with that sorry apology. You'd woken up this morning less mad and more sad… smad. Sure, you were smad. It seemed that a night of sleep hadn't deterred your ex-best friend from talking to you, and you couldn't decide if that was a good or bad thing.

"You don't even go to this school," you told him in a pathetic attempt to wave him away without actually waving him away.

"This is a public campus, Yn." He pulled out the seat across from you before you could protest. "I don't have to go to this school."

You scowled. The organ in your chest was beating awfully fast—you really hoped you weren't about to get in a screaming match with him here of all places. "What do you want, Hyunjae? You can't just show up everywhere I go unannounced."

"I don't do that."

"I'm starting to think you're obsessed with me, actually."

"Will you just—"

"Heya, Yn." Relief flooded through you at the sight of Changmin and Sunwoo walking up to your table. The former narrowed his eyes behind his dark-framed glasses. "Everything okay?"

You flipped your notebook closed and swiftly packed all of your items up. "Yeah, perfectly," you said. Hyunjae didn't follow as you stood up. "Bye, Hyunjae."

As you walked toward the library exit, Changmin and Sunwoo converged on either side of you. "What was that all about?" Sunwoo asked, his head peering behind you at the boy who was no doubt still sitting at the table. "Why is he here?"

You shook your head and pushed out onto the university grounds, propping the door open for your friends trailing behind. "Dude, I have no idea. He dropped by on my way out of work last night—"

"He what?"

"It wasn't even a productive conversation," you told them. You didn't know where you were going, but you turned around to face them as you walked backward along the path. Maybe you shouldn't have just left him there. "I don't even know how he knew I was at the library."

Changmin's mouth quirked downward. "Isn't this like… kind of creepy? What's with him anyway?"

"Yeah, Yn, how do you know him?" Sunwoo chimed in.

You sighed, face scrunching up as you thought about where to begin. Swiveling back to front, your friends clung onto you—both physically and to your words. "Our parents loathe each other, because they're business rivals, but Hyunjae and I went to the same schools when we were kids and we became friends."

It had been the two of you against the world—best petty friends. That first time his parents had driven him over to your house for a play date, the looks on both yours and his parents had been priceless. It'd been a wonder that they'd let you continue with the play date. From that point on, however, you both became friends for life, all despite the odds.

At least, that was how it had been.

Three years ago, just before both of you were going to begin your college careers, he had pretended that everything between the two of you was nothing more than dumpster fire. He ended up with Kyla, he became a jerk, and you'd spiraled. Had it been something you'd done? Had it been you? Did his parents open his eyes to your families' petty rivalry and get him to turn on you? That was what it had seemed like.

You'd survived, somehow. You had friends now—good friends, nice friends, un-petty friends. (But Hyunjae had been that person for you, too, once upon a time.)

You found yourself in your apartment at six in the evening the next day, staring at a half-drunk glass of wine and a crossword on your coffee table. You'd snatched up one of the newspapers in the lobby to busy yourself with in an attempt to take your mind off thrown cups of coke, bitchy ex girlfriends, and bitter ex friends.

It hadn't worked yet.

A knock on your front door drew your focus away, and you dragged yourself up from the couch to see who it was. Something panged in your chest at the face on the other side of the peephole.

You ripped the door open. "Do you want a restraining order?"

Hyunjae stood on the other side looking a little less put together than yesterday, but still more put together than you. "Yn, can we please just talk?"

"How do you even know where I live?" You asked him, not moving from the threshold, and thus, leaving him no room to come in.

"I literally helped you move in three years ago," he said, blinking. Oh. "Now, can I please come in?"

At least he was saying please, you reasoned with yourself. Begrudgingly, you let him in.

His shoulders seemed to deflate as he slipped inside, and he left his shoes on the show rack by the front door. Once you'd replaced all the locks, you swept past him to your kitchen area. "Want a drink?"

"Uhm, sure. Yeah, thanks."

You came back to the couch with another glass and poured him some of the red.

The two of you sat on the couch beside each other with a comfortable amount of space in the middle. He picked up his glass and chugged the entire thing, while you finished off your own glass and reached for the bottle. It felt so strange to be in his space again—or at least, for him to be in your space again. You didn't know if the jittery kick in your heart was from nervousness, excitement, or both.

What more did he have to say to you?

When you topped your glass off again, Hyunjae refilled his own.

"What do you want from me, Hyunjae?" You asked him for what felt like the hundredth time within the past week. You didn't have the heart to look at him now, the alcohol making your brain buzz and your chest heavy.

He nursed his glass, elbows braced on his knees. "I'm sorry," he said, clearing his throat when his voice came out rough. He fidgeted with the collar of his shirt. "You're probably so fucking tired of me, but I just… I knew I had to make things right."

You tugged your legs onto the couch and tucked them under you. "Why? Because you broke up with your girlfriend for throwing soda in my face?" For a moment, the thought amused you. Out of all the things to break up with Kyla for—out of all the things—it'd been over Coca-Cola.

Hyunjae swallowed down his wine. "No, that's not—that's not why I wanted to break up with her. I mean, part of it, of course. She'd disrespected you and your friend and the workplace."

His words and their sincerity drew your eyes to him on your left. His head hung, but you could see the glazed look in his eyes, dulling out those pretty, mahogany irises of his. He looked like your Hyunjae for once, not the one who had appeared in the doorway of the pizzeria with his arm around a girl who didn't appreciate him or anyone.

"And I'm sorry for that," he continued. "I'm sorry I didn't do more to prevent that from happening."

You stared down into the dark stillness of your wine glass. "Well, it wasn't exactly your fault," you said quietly.

You heard him huff, "Yeah, sure." He lifted the glass up to his lips again, and you did the same.

"The little altercation was recorded and posted online," Hyunjae suddenly said. "And when my parents saw, they pretty much backed out of the partnership between our company and Kyla's parents'. They didn't let me break up with her before because of the contract or whatever, but after that PR nightmare, they pretty much cut ties for me."

He took another swig, and you found yourself really looking at him this time.

"I was and have been an asshole to you, Yn," he said. "And it's no excuse, but it was… I was just trying to make it easier for both of us."

The wine was penetrating your defenses. Or maybe that was his story. But either way, the stinging in the corners of your eyes led to a watering of your vision, and everything was getting blurry. The lights, him, your whole view of the situation. His parents hadn't turned him, but shackled him instead.

"I thought," you began, lifting a hand up to wipe your eyes dry, "you hated me."

Hyunjae raised his head, shaking it, then hanging it again. He drank. "I couldn't hate you. I tried—I tried to make it easier to see you differently, but… Yn, you were my best friend." His voice broke at the end and he swallowed. "I thought about you so much these past few years, and it was so hard to get through it without you."

Your heart was sinking fast into your stomach and you could feel it hammer against your bones. You'd thought about him too much, as much as you loathed to admit. The man who you felt had simply thrown you away… how pathetic was it that you couldn't stop caring? But now, the lens was widening. Maybe your feelings weren't so unique.

Both you and Hyunjae moved at the same time, arms raising to drain your glasses of the last bits of wine.

You told yourself it was the wine that was making you want to cry, but when you and Hyunjae looked at each other, his eyes were lined with silver. He sniffled, setting his glass on the coffee table. "I'm sorry," he whispered, biting his lip when emotion made him screw his face up and turn away from you.

You put your glass next to his and clambered over the sofa to wrap your arms around him. He turned his face into your chest and sobbed, the sound coaxing a crest of emotion out of you, too, and you held him and rocked him through the oncoming waves.

It was the wine, you thought. God it was the wine. It had to be the wine.

But your best friend was here in your arms, where he belonged, you liked to think. He was home.

You curled your hand over the back of his head, your cheeks damp. "'m sorry they forced you into that relationship," you rasped. The bitterness was sweeping back in a different color. "I wish I knew."

He sniffled. "They threatened to do something to your parents' company. I couldn't—I couldn't let you and them get involved."

The confession stabbed through you. You had no idea what his parents had told him, and made him do, for the sake of business. You had no idea how unhappy he was, and god—you wished you'd known. Maybe things wouldn't have come to such hurt.

Hyunjae pulled himself away from you and wiped his eyes. "I think after all that shit, I'm a little fucked up."

The both of you shared a watery laugh, the space that had originally been left between you, nonexistent.

You cupped the sides of his face. "You made it though, and you've been so strong, Jae."

His bottom lip trembled. "Can you ever forgive me?"

"Yeah," you nodded. "Yeah, I forgive you." How could you not? And it was the wine—you swore it was the wine—that had you leaning forward and pressing a kiss to his hairline. His eyes fluttered shut as he leaned into you, his hand reaching up to cover your hand with his own.

"I like you a whole lot better than her," he murmured.

"I'd hope so," you mused, patting his cheek. "You deserve to have someone so much better than her."

He gulped, eyes searching your face. "You think so?"

"I know so."

Your heartbeat stuttered when he leaned forward slightly. You could smell the wine on his breath as it fanned over your skin. It felt as if the world slowed in that moment—the lights were dimmer, his eyelids low, lips shiny and plush.

And then he blinked, energy and alarm and… something else in his expression. He pulled out of your hold and his ears turned bright red. "I should go."

Your lips parted. "Wait—"

He practically leapt off the couch and banged his knee against the wall as he hobbled into his shoes. "Damn—I—" he opened the front door, pausing over the threshold. You didn't know why he was leaving; you wanted him to stay. Why, why, why was he leaving? "I, uhm, I've overstayed my welcome."

The door rattled as he closed it behind him, as if to tell you to not follow him out. You were left on the couch alone again, two empty glasses of wine, feeling stripped.

What the hell was that?

"And he just… left?"

You nodded, sweeping the apron around your waist over the hook in the back room of the pizzeria. It was late when yours and Dae's shift ended, as per usual. The shop was pretty much closed, leaving the two of you and two of the cooks who usually closed up the establishment when you both left.

For the entirety of your shift, you had been turning over yesterday's events over and over again. "I don't know what I did wrong, y'know? Maybe I crossed a boundary or something? I dunno."

Worry gnawed at your stomach as you recalled what happened to Dae. You both stepped out of the back of the building to head to your respective cars. It was dark out, as it usually was, with a few street lights along the road that you and Dae stuck to while walking.

As you approached your car, you noticed Hyunjae standing beside it with his hands tucked in his pockets and his head turned toward you. Rather than the sourness you'd felt for him at the beginning of the week, the feeling twisting in your chest was sweeter, but bitter still.

"I'll see you tomorrow then," Dae said to you softly with a gentle nudge of your arm. She walked ahead of you and passed by your car to get to hers, leaving you to confront the man plaguing your every thought for the past week.

You swallowed as you made your way over to the driver's side door where he was standing. "Hey."

Hyunjae gave a slight bob of his head. "Hey."

"Did I do something wrong yesterday?" You asked him, earnestly, searching his face for any hint as to why he had left so abruptly.

"No, it wasn't your fault—it definitely wasn't your fault," he told you. He sucked in a breath, carding a hand through his hair. "I had an epiphany of sorts."

"An epiphany?" You furrowed your brows.

His cheeks had flushed slightly, and he couldn't exactly meet your eyes. "I thought it was just the alcohol clouding my judgment, and in combination with all the emotions, and I just—" he shook his head. "It's probably not important, but…"

You bumped your elbow with his. "Jae, you're here. It probably is important."

A small smile curled up onto his face. "Y'know," he began, finally lifting his head to look you in the eyes, "she would have agreed with me and brushed me off."

You knew who the "she" he was talking about was. You frowned. "She was never good enough for you, Hyunjae."

"I know." He sighed. "I just wanna be enough for you though now."

Surprise lit across your face, and you could feel the butterflies in your stomach start to take flight. You couldn't think coherently with his words, and you were probably reading into it too much. The two of you had been away so long that you probably forgot how to read him; there was no doubt that something changed over the past three years, right?

When you failed to find a reply, he shifted slightly, his body facing straight toward you. "I've had a lot of time to think, and the whole time I was with her, I just kept comparing her to you." He stepped closer to you and his hand reached out to tentatively take your fingers with his. "She never measured up; maybe that made me even more bitter for ruining our friendship."

You met his eyes. There was that glimmer of the rich brown like what you'd seen last night. (Your Hyunjae was present and accounted for.) "What… what are you saying?"

"I'm saying that I," he said, fully taking your hands with his, "would like to start over on a slightly different note. But if you don't feel the same, we can start wherever you're comfortable with."

It would be different, you realized. But it would be a good different, right?

You found your voice, curled your fingers around his in the space between you. "Okay."

His smile slowly widened, his eyes squinting into upturned crescent moons. "Okay?"

You nodded, returning the expression. "Let's start over on that different note."

The pizzeria was as alive as usual. It was warm, smelled like tomatoes and cheese and bread, and it was still your home away from home. You had just finished your break and were tying your apron back on when Dae bumped her hip against yours as she passed by with a tray of dirty dishes.

"Your banshees just got in," she said, before disappearing through the kitchen doors.

Your gaze went to the door where you found your five friends, and the additional three, who were filing in altogether. You made eye contact with one person in particular, his smile softening into something fond at the corners of his mouth. He lifted a hand in greeting, grabbing everyone else's attention as they said their hellos to you.

The eight of them made their way over to the round table in the back corner, piling into the chairs around it.

"Waitress! Waitress!" The hyena-like sound set off an alarm in your head and you came over to the table to give Changmin a stink eye. He grinned innocently. "Oh yay, it worked."

You gave him an unimpressed look. "You sound like a chihuahua."

"Joke's on you, I think chihuahuas are cute," he huffed, leaning back in his chair with his arms crossed over his chest.

You braced your hand on the back of Hyunjae's chair, the other one gently patting the top of his head. He acknowledged your greeting, his hand reaching up to cover yours on the chair back. "What's to drink, y'all?"

A chorus of beverages rang out, and you mentally counted the few repeats and the singles. You promised to be right back, and left to go grab them. As you went, you could hear your boys start up a lively debate about the multipurpose properties of the lemon. You wondered if that was what they had been bickering about on the car ride over here, and you heard Eric say something about lemons for cleaning; Juyeon just said lemonade; and Changmin said for inflicting "more pain." (No, you didn't want to know.)

When you returned to their table to pass out your drinks, you went around, leaving Hyunjae for last. You set his cup of coke in front of him and he passed you a smile.

"You're not gonna dump that on me, are you?" You asked, eyes narrowing playfully.

He grinned. "As long as you don't dump me, we're good."

Sunwoo made a face from across the table. "Yuck, get a room!"

Chanhee smacked him upside the head. "At least they have someone to be yucky with."

"This feels familiar somehow," Kevin pondered aloud. "Like déjà vu."

Jacob shrugged. "Maybe in another universe. I dunno, it seems like something we would have said to Sunwoo at some point."

"Hey!—"

You were halfway through a laugh when Hyunjae caught your attention, twisted around in his chair to smile up at you. "What's up?" You asked him.

His eyes, you could never get sick of his eyes. They glistened in the lighting here. "Nothing," he said swiftly, "I'm just… happy to be here." With you.

You understood, and you caught his hand on the back of the chair and gave him a little squeeze. "I'm happy you're here, too." It seemed that some things were just meant to come full circle.

tbz m.list

permanent taglist: @flwoie @vatterie @seomisaho @hqrana @ja4hyvn @tinkerbell460 @kaaimins @hyunjaespresent-deobi @otterly-fey @zzoguri @floatingpluto @winterchimez @ethereal-engene @gyulfriend @polarisjisung @jaehunnyy @shakalakaboomboo @loveliestfelix @bless-311 @zhaixiaowen @leaz-kpop-life @amourdsr @pxppxrminty @kqyutie @sseastar-main @kxthleen14 @fluorescentloves @mosviqu @justalildumpling @jaerisdiction @super-btstrash-posts @jundundun @http-gyu @mvvnsseul @outrologist @vernonburger @maessseongs @kflixnet @ericlvr

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collapsedglasshouses · 1 year

Text

Consequences || Noah Sebastian x Reader [Part 5]

PART 1 - PART 2 - PART 3 - PART 4

Pairing: Noah Sebastian x Reader

Summary: Figuring out when and how to tell Nick about Y/N's and Noah’s relationship wasn’t as easy as originally thought.

Warnings: 18+, MDNI, mentions of alcohol consumption/drinking, mentions of throwing up, NSFW, SMUT, fingering, handjob, unprotected sex (p in v) (don’t do that kids!), swearing, angsty, fluffy, smutty, EVERYTHING, PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF I FORGOT SOMETHING

Taglist: @jakekiszkasguitarpick @blackveilomens @kingdomof-omens @a1ex-ba1ex

A/N: Hello cuties! As heartbreaking as it is, this is the final part of the Consequences Series. I’m actually kinda proud of myself since this was my first published work in English! At the end I also wrote a little text so imma just say this here: I'm not ready to say goodbye to this fic but I hope I found a good finish to it. Enjoy and let me know if you liked it 🫶🏻

The first time you and Noah almost told Nick was New Year’s Eve…

"We need to go outside again." You mumbled while Noah was peppering kisses on your neck and he hummed in agreement. It was New Year Eve and therefore another two weeks had past that were filled with sneaky touches and kisses from you or Noah.

You hadn't found the time to tell your brother about your little affair that bloomed into a full-blown relationship. Much to the dismiss of Jolly, who was the only one knowing about this whole thing. He even made it very clear that you two owed him something since he didn't even come to the hotel room that night. He decided to play black out drunk and ended up in the middle of the king size bed your brother and Folio shared.

You felt Noah’s hands sneak under your shirt, while he pressed himself against you. You felt how hard he was, but you also knew that it was about ten minutes before midnight and you couldn’t just spend them fucking your boyfriend in the bathroom, while all your friends were celebrating downstairs, not even knowing you were dating.

“We really need to go outside again, Noah.” You almost moaned out. It was pointless anyway to pretend that you had even an ounce of control when it came to him. Everyday for the last two weeks was filled with the two of you having sex in every little corner of your apartment. Much to the dismiss of your upstairs neighbors, but they had owed you something for the past two years of them shouting at each other non-stop at every possible time of day.

“Just two more minutes.” He groaned in your ear and his hand nearly had slipped through the waistband of your shorts, but you quickly turned around to face him before it was too late. “If we don’t go now, we miss New Year.” – “Y/N, we have 365 days left of 2023, I think it’s not possible for us to miss the new year except we die in the next ten minutes.” He stated making you roll your eyes, before you stood on tiptoes and kissed his nose.

"Give me a second." He than exclaimed, eyeing down to his pants where his boner still clearly made an appearance. You giggle quietly, before giving him some space.

When he was ready, you grabbed his hand and made your way outside with him, making sure to let go of his hand right in time before anyone could notice. While the others were busy chatting, Jolly shot you two a knowing gaze before you grabbed your drink that you left in Jolly’s hand and turned your attention to the group in front of you. Noah stood close next to you due to the temperatures.

You couldn’t believe the year was already coming to an end. Everything was so fucking different from last years New Years Eve, but you wouldn’t have changed a thing. You were here with your closest friends and your boyfriend, who also happened to be your best friend in the whole world.

"Next year is going to be so awesome. So many tour dates and we can finally work on album number 4." Folio rambled happily before taking a sip out of his cup. You on the other hand began to think. You were so happy with Noah but you needed to realise that you weren't going to have that much time together all the time. While you had the luck of working from home most of the time, Noah's job was to tour the world. You had been on a couple of stops with them while they toured and you totally got why they loved it so much. You loved seeing them perform. You loved the energy. It warmed your heart to know they finally could do what they loved all the time.

As if Nick had heard your thoughts, he sighed. "Maybe you should come with us for the next tour, Y/N" - "What?" - "You heard me right. You always join us for a couple of days and you love it. Maybe you can organize it with work that they don't need you in the office for a couple of weeks."

First your eyes met Noah's with surprise who showed you a warm smile, than your gaze wandered to Folio who looked at you awaiting an answer, so did Jolly. When you looked back at your brother's eyes he also smiled widely at you. "I-... I'd love to. I'll see what I can do."

With that Folio gave you such a big hug, he even lifted you off the ground, making you scream. When he finally let you down again, you tried to fix your clothes that were now a lot more wrinkly than they already were from your's and Noah's activities in the bathroom before.

"Next year is going to be even better than this." Jolly exclaimed, making you chuckle a little. "What?" - "I don't know, that sounded like a white woman's Instagram caption." You answered your friend, making the others laugh while Jolly looked at you offended. "Leave me and my white woman's captions alone, Y/N."

"Okay, stop the fighting. One minute to go." Jesse than interrupted your little argument and joined together with the others attending your small party.

You made sure to stand between your brother and Noah, who not so secretly grabbed your hand while the countdown started.

10...

9...

8...

7...

6...

5...

4...

You felt a squeeze on your hand and looked at Noah. He gave you the sweetest smile ever.

3...

2...

Was he really going to-...

1...

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Your heart raced when Noah bent down a little and than...

...placed a long and sweet kiss on your cheek before hugging you tightly. You automatically wrapped your arms around his neck and returned his hug even more tightly.

"Happy New Year, Y/N" - "Happy New Year and to many more, Noah."

With that you let go of each other but before you went on to hug the others, you smiled at each other knowingly.

This year was definitely going to be great...

The next morning didn't start as great for you as you thought though. You woke up with the biggest headache you ever had and felt like you needed to throw up any minute. The light from outside burned in your eyes and when you realised you weren't laying in the guest bedroom, you shot up and almost instantly regretted it, immediately feeling even more nauseous.

You quickly scanned the room, realizing you were on the living room couch. You almost let out a scream when you felt someone next to you shift. It was Noah. Why did you sleep on the couch with him?

"Good Morning, love." He mumbled next to you, brushed your hair out of your face and than instantly noticed your confused look. "Why did we sleep here?"

"You got so drunk, you lay down here and instantly fell asleep." He answered. "And why are you here?" - "You don't remember?" - "Remember what?"

"Jolly and I did our utter best keeping you from telling Nick that we are together for about 1000 times. In the end you didn’t let me go and insisted on me staying with you right before you fell dead asleep." Noah answered you, while your mouth fell open.

"He is right, you were really talkative last night." Jolly suddenly said from the other side of the room, causing you to scream out in fear and instantly regretting it.

Quickly you stood up and made your way to the bathroom and puked. When you felt a little better, you got up and rinsed your mouth before looking in the mirror. You realised someone had taken your make up off.

"Your welcome." Noah said, standing in the door frame, making you jump a little. "Could you all please stop scaring me."

"Sorry." He mouthed before stepping behind you and wrapping his arms around your waist. She sighed, instantly relaxing, when his head fell onto your shoulder.

"Should I make you a cup of tea or something?" Noah asked and you looked him in the eyes through the mirror. His voice was still raspy from sleep and it gave you instant goose bumps. When you were honest with yourself, you couldn't believe you pulled his ass. He was the most beautiful man you ever laid eyes on.

"If it doesn't bother you." - "You never bother me." With that he placed a kiss to your temple and headed of to the kitchen.

After you brushed your teeth, you followed him, finding that Jolly had also found himself at the kitchen counter.

"Are the others still sleeping?" You asked, sitting down next to Jolly. "I think so, it's only 9 AM and we were awake until 4:30..."

"What the hell did I do last night?" You than wanted to know, causing Noah and Jolly to shoot each other knowing glances.

You looked back and forth between them until Jolly finally started to talk. "You want me to start with the first one or the funniest one?" - "Just tell me."

"I think the best one was when you were about five shots in, you grabbed your brother by the collar and almost shouted into his ear how in love you are with Noah." Jolly laughed. "WHAT?" You looked at your boyfriend who nodded slightly while setting a cup of tea down in front of you. The memory slightly started to form in your head.

"You know what, Nick?" - "Yes, Y/N?" - "I'M MADLY IN LOVE WITH-..." Jolly instantly came to your rescue. "ALL OF US... uhm... She loves all of us, isn't that right, Y/N." - "Yeah, totally but I REALLY love-..." - "This tequila shot!" Jolly quickly shoved the shot into your hand and with that you forgot what you wanted to tell your brother and drank it.

"Oh my god, I want to die." You cried out in embarrassment and set your head down on the kitchen counter.

"Why that?" You heard your brother ask behind you. And the game began again...

"She is hungover." Noah quickly answered for you and than you felt a hand on your back. Your brother's.

"Maybe drink five tequila shots less next time." - "I'll consider it."

When you looked up again and grabbed your tea cup to drink from it, your eyes locked with Noah's, who was leaning against the wall across from you. You knew this couldn't go on like this forever but for now it needed to be.

The second time Nick almost found out was not even a month later...

The house was almost creepily empty when you arrived at Noah's place three hours ago. After work you decided to give the boys a visit, only texting Nick but you didn’t receive an answer before arriving, just to find out your boyfriend was the only one home.

But you certainly didn't complain that you had the house all to yourself. The two of you had decided to play some video games like you always did. So you found yourself laying between his legs, leaned against his chest.

You were surprised Noah even took the time to just play video games with you since he mutated into a workaholic with the band stuff going that well. He normally always had an excuse to work on something music related but since you got together you had a feeling he finally gave himself some deserved rest.

"Fuck this, I give up." He cursed out about ten minutes later after you died almost ten times in a row at the same point in the game. You gave him a confused side eye. "Are you really this offended by the game now?" - "I think you should watch your mouth, Y/N." He replied and softly shoved you away from him. "Or what, Noah?"

You turned around between his legs to look him in the eyes. His irises immediately darkened while you sneaked up to him and than straddled his lap. Still not changing his slightly angry face, he placed his hands on your hips. "Don't tease me, Y/N"

"I would never." You sweetly answered him before moving your hips once and than leaning down to pepper kisses on his neck. "I don't know how you got that idea."

You heard him breathe loudly when you slightly nibbled on his earlobe.

With that it took only about a minute before you two sat there only in your underwear.

Noah slowly kissed his way down your neck, finding your sweet spot and started sucking on it. You slightly moaned and than your hand quickly found it’s way in between you two. First you stroked him through his underwear a couple of times, causing him to bite down on your neck and bringing out a tone from you that made him buck up his hips.

"Fuck, Y/N. You drive me insane." He moans in your ear.

With that you slowly pulled down his underwear. He made sure to press his lips on yours again when you slowly let your hand slide up and down his cock. His heavy breaths against you face sent a wave of heat to your core and before you knew his hand also wandered between you and pulled your underwear to the side.

Skilfully he found your clit and started circling it.

"Fuck, Noah." You moaned into his mouth, feeling yourself getting even more wet.

When he bucked his hips up again, you knew this wasn’t enough anymore.

"I need you, Y/N." Noah than whispered against your lips. „Now."

With that you quickly repositioned yourself, letting his tip go through your folds a couple of times before slowly gliding down his cock. Causing the both of you to moan in pleasure.

You let yourself adjust for a couple of seconds while Noah placed soft kisses on your lips.

"You are so fucking beautiful." He muttered against your lips and before you slowly start to move, you brush his hair out of his face. "You're even more beautiful." The smile that spread on his face, gave you goose bumps.

When you slowly began to move, his hands instantly found your hips, giving you a bit of guidance while you tried to take in every second that's happening before you.

You still couldn’t believe this whole thing was actually happening. Every fiber of your body was screaming for him. You wanted nothing more than to belong to him.

So when his arms wrapped around you and made you lay flat on his chest while he started pumping up into you, you could help but exclaim your thoughts. "God, I love you so much."

When you felt your orgasm built up, you were more than pleasantly surprised when Noah spoke up again. "Fuck, Y/N. I'm so close." He moaned in your ear and sent shivers down your spine.

"I need you to cum for me, Noah." You whined in his ear and you almost found your highs when suddenly…

… There was a knock on the door.

That’s when Noah and you came at the same time while trying to tame each others moans with a kiss. You felt his cum spread inside of you.

Than there was a second knock. It shot you right back to reality. You two looked at each other mortified while quickly separating from each other.

"Give us a second." Noah exclaimed frustrated trying to shuffle into his clothes without falling to the ground, while you tried to do the same, with the little extra add on that you felt his cum slowly dripping out of you.

"Is everything okay?" You heard your brother's voice from the other side of the door while you searched for your shirt. You randomly grabbed the black one, laying next to the bed and threw it over your head before fixing your hair and positioning yourself on the edge of Noah's bed.

Noah in the meantime found it’s way to the door and opened it for your brother.

"How can we help you?" Noah asked Nick.

"I wanted to ask if you two want to-…" Nick stopped in his tracks when he saw you sitting on Noah‘s bed while probably having the most "I'm not guilty"-gaze on your face that you ever had, but Nick's eyes focused on your shirt.

"Why are you wearing Noah's shirt?" Your brother asked you and with that Noah's gaze also landed on you with widened eyes.

Quickly you looked down to see there was no doubt you were wearing Noah's shirt, since it was his iconic Cher t-shirt.

You swallowed hard before looking back at your brother and quickly defended yourself. "I spilled my drink over my shirt and Noah was so kind to borrow me his."

Nick looked between you and Noah a couple of times before clearing his throat. "I wanted to ask you if you wanted to watch a movie with us downstairs. Jolly is making popcorn right now so… We would start in five minutes."

With that he gave you two another concerned look before leaving Noah's room, causing you to relax again.

"Oh my fucking god." You whisper-shouted at him the second his door is closed again.

"I didn’t mean to… You know…" Noah mumbled.

"Cum inside of me while my brother was literally standing in front of your door?" You cried out, feeling how is cum had dripped onto his bed. "When I say it like this it sound so weird."

Noah nodded before sitting down next to you.

"Imma have to ask you something before we can go downstairs…" You began. "Helping you clean up? No problem, you can also borrow underwear from me, no one will notice it under your pants."

You gave him a thankful look, before grabbing his collar and kissing him again. After that you two cleaned up the mess you made before both standing in the middle of his room.

"Are you ready to be totally platonic friends again?" He asked while wrapping his arms around you and placing a kiss on the top of your head.

„You mean, we JUST PRETEND?" You giggled before stepping towards the door.

"I hate you, Y/N." - "No, you love me."

Noah smirked at you while rolling his eyes before following you downstairs…

The third time you didn’t tell Nick, it made things even worse…

"Tell me, Noah. Is this all a joke to you?" You asked Noah while he leaned on the kitchen counter.

You two had been out together when a fan approached you and asked for a picture. That wouldn’t have been a problem. They knew you since you spooked around almost every tour the boys played. The problem was how Noah openly flirted with the young lady.

You normally weren’t really jealous but somehow this just kicked the air out of your lungs.

"To me? Are you kidding me, Y/N? You are literally the one who is almost begging to keep our whole relationship a secret!" Noah answered you, crossing his arms in front of his body.

You would have lied if you said you didn’t know this was coming sooner or later. But you were just so afraid.

"I'm not… I… I just-…" You mumbled, seemingly not able to find the right words.

"You what, Y/N?" Noah almost spit out "You realised you liked us better when we were just friends?" - "No, Noah… I…"

"Then fucking explain why we are keeping this a secret? We've been dating for almost three months and nobody knows it, except Jolly!" Noah yelled at you, making you shrink a little.

Your mind started to race. You knew you acted stupid but you were just so afraid everything would change when you let the others know. You loved having this whole thing all to yourself.

You realised you had been quiet for too long when Noah sighed.

"You know what? Maybe this really was a mistake…" You felt your heart shatter to pieces when Noah walked over to your couch and grabbed his jacket before attempting to leave your apartment.

"Noah, wait!" You shouted after him but he headed out the door and slammed the front door right in your face.

You quickly ran after him, continuing to shout for him to stop.

"Noah, please wait." He was still walking straight to his car. You wrapped your arms around you since it was already dark outside and you hadn’t thought about grabbing a jacket.

"Don't fucking ignore me, Noah Sebastian!" You snapped and finally brought him to stop.

"Than tell my why the fuck you’re avoiding to tell Nick that we are dating?" He asked you with no emotion in his tone.

This was exactly what you didn’t want to happened. You could recall exactly how you told him you wouldn’t want to be the one to hurt him since you two saw each other get hurt by others way to many times.

"This is exactly what I meant back at the hotel room when I told you I don’t want to hurt you." - "Well congrats, Y/N, you fucking did, since I'm not even worthy to be your official boyfriend."

He attempted to open his car door but you found your way between him and the door.

"Step aside, Y/N." - "I'm afraid he will hate us."

"Why the fuck should he, Y/N? We’re literally adults! It isn’t weird that we fell in love. We literally have been attached at the hip since we were… what? 12?" Noah responded, not seeming even a bit calmer.

"I just don’t want this to change!" You than exclaimed and made things even worse.

His eyes changed again. They almost seemed glossy. His next words shot you right in the heart. "Well, if you don’t want this whole secret little thing to change, it means you don’t want to be with me."

With that he gentle shoved you to the side and got into his car.

"Noah, please don’t do this!" You shouted when he closed the door. You knocked against his window but he didn’t even look at you again before driving off.

Fuck. Fuck. FUCK.

The forth time you had the chance to tell Nick, you did waste no time…

It took you about two hours to gather your confidence before you got into your car and drove to the boys' house.

When you parked in front of the house, your heart was racing. You knew you needed to clarify this now and you would not let anyone or anything hold you off.

You took a deep breath before getting out of you car and going up to the door to ring the bell.

To your surprise it was Noah who opened the door. His expression instantly darkened when he saw you. That hurt you more than words could ever do.

"What do you want?" He asked you plainly. "Let me in."

When he continued to stare at you blankly, not allowing you entry, you took your chance to slip inside when you saw Nick walk by.

"Nick, I need to talk to you!" You yelled at your brother, who stopped in his tracks to look at the two of you confused.

"What’s going on?" He wanted to know, crossing his arms in front of his body, concerned by your expression.

"I'm in love with Noah." You directly shouted out, without thinking twice. You needed to do it now.

If Nick didn’t already look confused, he definitely did now.

"And Noah and I've been dating for almost three months." With that Nick's eyebrows lifted.

"And I didn’t tell you because I was scared that it will change everything but to be honest… I was fucking stupid… Noah is by far the best thing that ever happened to me in my whole entire life." You took a breath. "And I know this is a lot to process for you right now, but I am so in love with Noah it hurts and it hurts even more when I hurt him just because I’m to scared to tell my brother that I love him." You rambled.

With that silence came over the entrance room. You again took a deep breath. Right now you were more than relieved that seemingly no one else was downstairs except the three of you. Not everyone needed to hear your meltdown.

"So… you two are-…" Nick fumbled with his hands. You quickly looked at Noah, who seemed to have frozen in his place, just staring at you surprised.

"Yes… Yes, we are dating." You answered for the both of you, even though Noah technically broke up with you about two hours ago.

"And you’ve been dating since-…" - "The wedding in December." - "When you two left early that evening you were-…" - "Yes." - "Eww."

It went quiet again. Your brother seemed to process what you said to him while your hands sweated like crazy.

"And you aren’t kidding me?" - "Why should I?"

"Your telling me, you just started dating in December and not much earlier?" Your brother asked confused, causing you to start your rant again: "Yes, Nick. And I will not defend myse-… what do you mean 'not earlier'?"

"You guys have been eye-fucking each other since when? A year now?" Nick explained with a hint of disgust in his face. "Which, first of all, is super gross but it would have been weirder if I had brought it up."

"WHAT?" Noah was the one to exclaim that.

"Oh man, don’t try to argue with me… You were basically all over her other ever since Y/N and her ex broke up." Nick than said. "Starting with your private movie nights and ending with Y/N knowing about song ideas that I didn’t even know about."

"So you’re not mad?" You shyly asked your older brother, who chuckled a bit.

"Why should I? I'm actually surprised it took you so long… You were always slightly to close for your own good, ever since that night almost ten years ago… you know the video…" Again, while your brother looked slightly disgusted at the memory, Noah and you looked at each other knowingly.

"After you and your ex broke up, I was so convinced you two were already seeing each other and I'm not exactly blind or delusional, Y/N. At the very latest I knew you two were at least hooking up when you were sitting in Noah’s room with his shirt on and you two looking like total messes." Nick than proceeded to explain, causing your cheeks to heat up.

„So you just guessed it by yourself?" Noah than wanted to know from his best friend. "Maybe Jolly also kinda indicated that you two hooked up on my birthday, which I will never forgive you by the way!"

You looked totally flabbergasted by your brother's words and one look at Noah revealed he maybe looked even more surprised than you.

"So what? You gonna make up now?" Nick asked, already starting to move to the stairs. "You don’t have a reason to fight anymore. I won’t hate you… nobody will… You two are literally the two most important people in my life and I always thought you would eventually end up together. So don’t be so hard on yourselves."

With that Nick turned on his heel and left the two of you alone.

"I-…" You wanted to start but didn’t know what to say. "Yeah, I know." Noah just answered.

"I'm so sorry Noah. I should have just jumped over my shadow." You mumbled and turned to face him completely. He had taken a couple of steps towards you. "You are literally so important to me. I'm deeply sorry for hurting you and-…"

"Would you mind if you could shut up now and let me kiss you?" Noah than interrupted you and before you knew he grabbed your face with his hands and brought your lips together.

Everything inside of you started to tingle. You felt like a child laying in bed the night before their birthday. You felt like a teenage girl kissing her crush for the first time. Somehow this was also kind of true because when you thought about it… He was the one you always loved.

Ever since you had laid eyes on him, deep down you knew it was him. He was your person and you knew nothing on this planet would change the fact that you two loved each other deeply.

I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS IS THE END. I BEGAN TO WRITE THE FIRST PART ABOUT TWO MONTHS AGO BUT ALWAYS WAS WAY TO SHY TO POST IT ON TUMBLR. MY BOYFRIEND CONVINCED ME IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA AND WHEN I FINALLY DID, I DIDN'T KNOW THE BAD OMENS TUMBLR COMMUNITY WOULD WELCOME ME WITH OPEN ARMS. SO… THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BEING SO KIND AND I HOPE TO READ YOU ON MY NEXT WORKS! ~JAZZ ❤️

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