#we were in shambles last night
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ratislatis · 1 year ago
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she was the last thing he saw
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dreamwritesimagines · 1 month ago
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Sunshine [6] - Middle of the Night
AN: My loves, thank you so so much for your wonderful support and lovely comments and HCs! ❤️ You’re amazing! ❤️
I hope you like this as well, and please don’t forget to tell me what you think, thank you! 🥰
Pairing: Logan Howlett x Female!Reader
Summary: Drunk calls can lead to sweet moments.
Word Count: 3500 
CW: Violence, explicit language, mentions of sex, drinking, getting drunk, throwing up
Series Masterlist
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To be completely honest, getting drunk was not in the plans tonight.
You were supposed to have one drink and go home but in your defense your best friend had tricked you with that two for one deal and now you were on your fifth cocktail, giggling at the story of her latest date.
“Listen, if you like him, I can totally normalize him living with his ex for you,” you told her and she made a face.
“How?”
“The rental market is in shambles.”
She let out a laugh, then shook her head.
“Nope.”
“Capitalism is fucking all of us—”
“We’re not doing that,” she said. “I mean how would you feel if Logan was living with his ex?”
“Logan hasn’t asked me out,” you pointed out. “Which is more reason to believe he doesn’t like me like that.”
“The guy maimed three people for you!”
“It could’ve been a friendly gesture!”
She threw her head back. “You’re not serious.”
You shrugged your shoulders, then downed your drink and motioned for another one.
“Listen,” you said, your mind all fuzzy. “Do I want Logan? Yes. Do I dream about us living happily ever after? Yes. Do I have very detailed fantasies about him breaking my bed? Also yes. But we don’t—”
“I’d just like to remind you that while you don’t have enough money to buy a new bed,” she interfered. “I will buy you a new one if you break it while the hot lumberjack is fucking your brains out.”
“Thank you, you’re a true friend,” you said solemnly as the waitress brought you your cocktail and you thanked her, then turned to Julie. “Jamie wants him to be terrible in bed so that I’ll snap out of this.”
“Doubt it,” she said. “The guy has been around since the mid-1800s, I’d assume he has some experience.”
You tilted your head, then gasped.
“Oh my God!” you said, reaching out to grab her arm over the table, almost knocking over her glass but she caught it before her drink could spill on the table. “What if Jamie is right?”
“I literally just said—”
“No, he was alive in mid-1800s!” you said, making her frown.
“Yeah?”
“What if he is like Edward Cullen and waiting for marriage?”
“That man is a whore!” Julie snapped, flailing her hands. “I’ve heard the way he speaks to you, he’s a slut—there’s no fucking way. He’ll break your bed any day now.”
You heaved a dramatic sigh. “To repeat, he hasn’t made a move.”
“To repeat, I think maiming three guys for you counts as making a move.”
You sucked on the straw of your cocktail, the happy warmth of alcohol buzzing in your head.
“So you think he likes me back?”
“I’m pretty sure he likes you back.”
 You grabbed some popcorn from the bowl on the table.
“Yeah well,” you said. “I guess we’ll see.”
“Why don’t you ask him out?”
You pulled your brows together. “I can’t do that Julie!”
“Why not?” she asked. “Is it the 1800s? Will people call you a harlot in the town square?”
“No!” you said. “No it’s just…”
“When was the last time you got laid?”
“That has nothing to with the situation,” you said and took a huge sip of your cocktail, making her grin.
“Remind me, when was it?”
“It’s been some time.”
“So why aren’t you climbing Logan like a tree?”
“I’m trying!” you whined and she motioned at you.
“Drink your cocktail. The whole thing.”
You nodded and downed your drink, your insides getting even warmer as you put your glass on the table. Julie grinned, and pushed your phone in your direction.
“Now call him.”
“Julie!”
“Just ask him out!” she said. “What’s the worst thing that could happen?”
“He could hang up on me.”
“He’s not gonna hang up on you,” she said. “Listen, that guy has been picking you up from work, calling you princess, saving you from creeps and sniffing your hair...”
“We’re not so sure about the last part.”
“Yes we are,” she said, pointing a finger at you. “Call him. You’ll be too much of a chicken to ask him out when you’re sober, so do it when you’re drunk.”
You let out a whine, then took the phone into your hands, heaving a sigh.
“What if I’m not his type?”
Julie rolled her eyes. “Somebody really needs to fuck you in front of a mirror.”
You scrunched up your face. “Oh I could never do that.”
“You should, it’s fun,” she said and nodded at the phone in your hand. “Call him.”
“But—”
“Do you want to fuck him, yes or no?”
“I want us to live happily ever after!” you said and paused for a second. “And yeah I want to fuck him. A lot. Day and night, multiple positions.”
“Call him.”
You took a deep breath, then nodded to yourself.
“I’ll be back,” you said and stood up from the chair, stumbling as the room spun around you but you grabbed the back of the chair and sat down again. “Shit, I’m too drunk.”
“It’s not that loud here,” she said. “You don’t have to go outside.”
“Okay,” you said and found Logan’s name, then touched it and took the phone to your ear, your heart pacing in your chest. You drummed your fingernails on the table, frowning to yourself, then lowered the phone.
“He’s not answering,” you said and ended the call, then turned to Julie. “Maybe he’s busy or something?”
“Yeah, didn’t you say they went on missions?”
“That’s what I heard,” you said and heaved a sigh. “Oh well. It was worth a shot.”
Julie shrugged her shoulders.
“Yeah,” she said and thought for a moment. “We should get shots.”
You gasped, and clapped your hands together.
“Yeah!” you said. “Yeah let’s get shots!”
                                                   *
Since Julie’s place was closer, you had split the taxi fee and dropped her off first before the taxi took you to your place. As it turned out, the shots were a bad idea because you had to rush to the bathroom to throw up as soon as you stepped foot into your apartment, but after you brushed your teeth and washed your face, you were still not sleepy.
On the contrary, you were pretty energetic.
…And hungry.
Starving, actually.
You hummed to yourself as you opened the fridge, then tilted your head. Nothing in your fridge looked good enough, so you grabbed your phone to order, but then scoffed when you saw the delivery fee.
“Absolutely not,” you murmured and grabbed your jacket to put it on, then grabbed your keys before walking out of the apartment. The buzz of the alcohol was still in your system despite you throwing up, so you hopped down the stairs and stepped out of the apartment.
Walking did help the nausea and your head spinning, and you were just passing by a shop when the fish tank caught your eye, making you stop in your steps.
Fish.
Interesting.
You stared at the shop window, nearly hypnotized by the lively colors and the fish swimming in the huge fish tank behind the glass but snapped out of it when your phone started vibrating in your pocket.
Logan.
“Oh fuck,” you muttered to yourself as you stared at the name flashing on the screen, your breath hitching. “Oh fuck, oh fuck…”
You took a deep breath, and touched the screen, then took the phone to your ears, your heart pacing in your chest.
“Hey!” you said, your voice going a pitch higher. “Um, what’s up?”
“Hi princess,” he said, his deep voice making you bite at your lip. “Didn’t hear you call, sorry about that.”
“No problem,” you said with a giggle. “Jesus, fish are pretty. Did you know they were pretty? I didn’t really pay attention to them but—oh my God. I’m so buying Theo fish.”
“What?”
“No seriously, he wanted it, and these things are tiny and it’s not that hard to take care of fish, is it? I mean it can’t be harder than taking care of orchids, Nik bought some for me and those things are goddamn suicidal, I tell you.”
“…Are you drunk?”
“Tipsy,” you corrected him as you fished your gloss out of your purse to apply it, staring at the window. “Tipsy-ish? This store is open right? Yeah, I see someone inside—”
“Hold on, you’re drunk and outside?” he asked. “Alone?”
“Yeah but it’s fine,” you said. “I stepped outside for some fresh air and I’m gonna get food but I got distracted by this aquarium—I’ll buy two fish and then put one of those fake trees and stuff into the tank—”
“Stay put, I’ll be there.”
“You don’t even know where I am though?” you said, looking around the street. “I’m close to my apartment but like I said, I need to eat something and Theo needs fish—”
“I’ll follow your scent, stay put,” he said and hung up, making you hum, and then put the phone into your pocket and entered the shop to smile at the owner.
“Good evening sir,” you said. “I need one orange and one white fish please. My son will name them Cheeto and Popcorn.”
                                               *
Logan found you as you were leaving the fast food place, holding the paper bag full of French fries tight with the small fish tank tucked in your other arm. You put the paper bag on the lid on the tank as the roar of the motorcycle made you lift your head and you looked over your shoulder.
Jesus Christ, he was too hot.
You could swear there were flying hearts circling your head as he got off the motorcycle and made his way to you, his herculean figure making you sigh before you looked up at his handsome face, your heartbeat getting faster.
“Hi sweetheart.”
You blinked up at him, still hugging the tank to your chest. “Hi. You’re very handsome.”
That made the corners of his mouth twitch into a small smile before he tilted his head.
“How much did you drink, again?”
“Um…” you bit inside your cheek, looking up at the dark sky to calculate in your head. “Six cocktails and a couple of shots. The shots were Julie’s idea though.”
“Right.”
“Hold this,” you said, pushing the tank into his arms before grabbing the paper bag to open it. “Ugh, I’m starving! Are you hungry?”
“Nope,” he said, still smiling. “Go ahead.”
You hummed a song to yourself as you dug into the fries, and cleared your throat, trying to focus.
“You didn’t have to drive all the way here,” you said. “My place isn’t far.”
“Mm hm, and you’re drunk.”
“Tipsy,” you corrected him as you chewed on the fries with him walking beside you. “I swear to God, potatoes are the best vegetable to grace this earth—what were you doing when I called? Am I keeping you from something?”
“Nope,” he said. “I was walking around the halls to make sure everything was alright, I didn’t take my phone with me. How about you? Fun night?”
“So much fun!” you said as you popped a couple of fries into your mouth. “Julie is seeing this guy—well, they slept together, and apparently he’s still living with his ex and it’s like a huge red flag for her, but seriously the rents are insane nowadays so I don’t—Logan, what are your thoughts on premarital sex?”
That made his head whip around and he stared at you while you calmly chewed on the fries, waiting for his answer.
“…Huge fan of it?” he said after a beat and you nodded your head.
“Same here,” you said as you started walking again. “Did you—um, so do you count as Victorian or Georgian? I always mix those two up for some reason.”
He pulled his brows together. “What?”
“I watch a lot of period movies, I think yearning is the most romantic thing in the entire world, that hand scene in Pride and Prejudice changed me as a person,” you said as you reached into the paper bag to pull out more fries. “Um, I have a lot of questions for you and I know you’re this cool and mysterious guy so you can just say yes or no.”
He stifled a laugh. “Sure thing, hit me.”
“Did anyone give you their handkerchief?”
“No.”
You gasped. “No one gave you their handkerchief? What a bunch of assholes!”
“I had other priorities in mind during those times, sweetheart.”
“Yearning is a priority, Logan,” you said wistfully. “Next question, were you ever accidentally engaged?”
“How does one get accidentally engaged?”
“People see you talking to each other without a chaperone.”
“What?” he asked with a grimace. “I don’t—no.”
“No wonder why you like modern times better, now that I think about it,” you murmured as you looked into the bag, then heaved a sigh when you saw only a couple of fries in it. You grabbed them and threw them into your mouth, then scrunched up the paper bag to throw it into the nearest trash can. “Do you like Cheeto and Popcorn?”
Logan pulled his brows together. “Come again?”
“The fish!” you pointed at the small fish tank he was holding in one hand and he looked down at it, then chuckled.
“Right,” he said. “They look nice, sweetheart.”
“Right? Theo will be very happy, and—is there any rules against pets at the school? Because he will want to take them there.”
“We can bend the rules a little for him, it’s fine,” he said, making you smile at him brightly.
“Aw thank you!” you said as you licked your lips, then looked around before turning to Logan. “Logan?”
His eyes held a soft light in them. “Hm?”
“Can I see your claws?”
He frowned slightly but unsheathed his claws. “Why? I don’t see any threats, do you—”
He was cut off when you held onto his arm to lift his hand a little to see the blur reflection of your face on the metal, then dabbed at your lip gloss that had smudged a little with the tip of your finger. You could feel Logan staring at you so you lifted your gaze for a moment.
“What?”
“…You—you know I’ve hurt a lot of people with them, right?”
“And now you’re helping me fix my makeup with them,” you said with a shrug of your shoulders. “Things can be of multiuse.”
He didn’t comment on it as you rubbed your lips together, then dropped his hand to beam at him. “Thanks!”
“No problem,” he managed to say with a small chuckle. “You are something else, you know that?”
“I’m taking that as a compliment,” you said happily but before you could thank him again, you noticed two guys staring at him, no doubt because of the claws. You could feel the sudden rush of anger sparking to life as you narrowed your eyes at them.
“What?” you snapped, making them snap out of the haze, exchanging glances. Logan raised his brows, his lips twitching as if he was amused. “What are you looking at?”
“Nothing,” one of them said. “Just claws—”
“Yeah, so?” you asked him as you took a step towards him but Logan put his hand over the back of your neck, gently pulling you back, looking like he was trying his hardest to keep a straight face and not burst into laughter as the guy stepped back. “What, do you wanna fight or something?”
“…No?”
“Then fucking act like it, how about that?”
“Your girl is aggressive, bro.”
“That she is,” Logan said, rubbing his thumb over the back of your neck. “Come on, let’s get you home.”
“It’s rude to stare, okay?” you told them over your shoulder as you started walking beside Logan. “No seriously like, didn’t your mom teach you anything? Call her, let’s see what she’ll say about you staring at strangers!”
Logan pursed his lips together to control the chuckle vibrating in his chest before he cleared his throat.
“Unbelievable,” you grumbled. “No seriously, even Theo knows not to stare at people and he still believes in Santa! That’s no excuse, what the fuck was that? You should’ve let me kick his ass!”
“I think you scared them off enough.”
“Good!”
“Do you always look for fights when you’re drunk?”
“I’m tipsy and I have zero tolerance for disrespect, Logan,” you pointed out. “I mean honestly, who raised these boys?”
Logan bit back a smile, then nodded in the direction of your building.
“Come on,” he said and you pulled out your keys, but then dropped them with a gasp. Logan picked them up, then opened the building’s door for you.
“It’s kind of like a handkerchief situation when you think about it,” you said happily as you climbed the stairs. If you weren’t so drunk, you would’ve noticed earlier that he was in fact in your building but it only dawned on you when you stopped in front of your apartment, then held your breath.
“Logan?” you asked, your heart beating faster at the possibility. “Would you like to come in?”
“I’ll just make sure you actually go to bed and not wander off to the street completely drunk,” he told you and you pouted your lips as he opened your door for you.
Stepping into your apartment, you yawned and looked over your shoulder as he closed the door behind him, then held up the fish tank.
“Where do you want to put it?”
“The kitchen is fine,” you said, pointing at the kitchen and he made his way to the kitchen while you swayed on your steps, making your way to your bedroom to fling yourself on the bed, kicking off your shoes. You heard the sound of water running before the footsteps came closer and you sat up in the bed, tucking your legs under you. Logan entered your bedroom, his hazel gaze focusing on you for a moment before he shook his head slightly and handed you the huge glass of water.
“Drink it.”
“Oh I’m not thirsty.”
“Drink it,” he repeated and you heaved a sigh, then took a sip of it before lowering the glass to your lap.
“I’m pretty sure those cocktails will knock you out but off the chance that you wake up still drunk, I need you to promise me—” Logan started but a tiny lint on the skirt of your dress caught your attention, making you distracted. You pulled at it with a frown but felt Logan tilt your chin up so that you could look up at him.
“Eyes on me princess, look at me.”
You could feel the warmth spreading through you as your eyes met his, pleasant goosebumps rising on your arms as you blinked up at him in adoration.
“Your voice is very deep,” you murmured and he smiled slightly.
“Did you hear a word I said?”
You thought for a moment, then shook your head.
“Don’t wander off to the street if you wake up in the middle of the night,” he said. “I need to get back to the institute but—”
“Or you could stay?” you asked, your voice soft in the quiet, dimly lit room and a shadow moved behind his hazel gaze, making your heart skip a beat. You knew he knew what you meant, and hope filled your system, making you feel nearly lightheaded at the possibility of him feeling half of the fire running through your veins.
You could swear there was some sort of invisible lighting crackling between you, making your breath catch in your throat as he traced your bottom lip with his thumb, making your eyes flutter close for a second before you looked up at him again.
“Logan…”
“That is not happening when you’re drunk, sweetheart,” he said, his voice low and you pulled your brows together.
“It could.”
“It won’t.”
 You bit inside your cheek, blinking up at him and he frowned as if trying to pull himself together. His knuckles brushed over your cheekbone softly before he withdrew his hand, then leaned down to press his lips to the top of your head, making you heave a sigh.
“Call me when you wake up tomorrow,” he said before he pulled back, then walked out of the room.
You heard the front door open, then close and you let out a whine, then let yourself fall back on the bed, pressing your fingertips on your lips. A giggle you couldn’t stop climbed up your throat and you lowered your hand, then took off your dress to throw it to somewhere in the room before grabbing the covers to pull them over your head, a huge smile curling your lips as you closed your eyes, sleep pulling you into its warmth.
7 - Heat Wave
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starsofang · 1 month ago
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CALL OF THE SEA / PART FOURTEEN
pirate poly!141 x f!reader tw: NSFW, MDNI, idk how to label this one so as always be warned? masterlist a/n: this is a more chill chapter w some drama ooo. next chapter i will try to make longer because we have a lot about to happen and a lot of progress that's being made but needs to move faster :,) i work two jobs now and work 14 hour days so thank you for being patient with me as i navigate through that. this story's lowkey falling off and not as many people seem to be into it which is fine but as always ily <3
When a group of unhinged pirates invade your small village, you're whisked away from your peaceful home and thrown on to a voyage out at sea. Forced to obtain a new role as their medic, you have no choice but to accept your fate as you join their forces and aid them in their treacherous travels.
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You woke with a heavy heart riddled with anxiety. The room was empty and dim, the sun fighting to peek through the small window without much victory. The air felt unusually gloomy, more than it normally did majority of the time.
You weren’t sure where Soap and Gaz ran off to, but you were more than grateful to have the time to yourself. Last night had you in a chokehold, and you knew it was the reason your heart felt like a thick lump in your chest.
Giving the telescope to Gaz. Sitting under a wishful sky together. Feeling his finger graze your cheek in a way that had your heart fighting against your rib cage.
Was he going to kiss you? Is that what that was? The mood of it all, it was so foreign you could barely grasp the concept, but it was the only theory you could come up with.
The mere thought had your mind in shambles, but your soul erupting a fire. You didn’t know what that meant, nor did you know if it was what you wanted to happen.
The Captain wouldn’t be too happy if his crew were messing around with you, would he? Why were you so worried about what he would think?
You could feel the tension in your head building to the point it was near explosive. With a groan, you stood from the bed, trying your hardest to shake it off for long enough. You didn’t want to seem like you were avoiding Gaz, or like you were having an inner battle with yourself. You wanted to appear absolutely normal.
You couldn’t help but glance in the direction of your dresses, where they were folded neatly on top of the desk. You had yet to wear them, and the many shirts you’d borrowed from them up until this point were beginning to bring you a sense of dread every time you’d be forced into a new one.
It wasn’t hard to make up your mind on which one. You had mostly muted colors as not to stick out like a sore thumb, so you picked the one that’d keep you most hidden, even if it was just the five of you on a ship to nowhere.
Preparing yourself for departure, you crept down the deck of the ship. The weather outside was unhappy, the sun tucked away behind gray clouds that looked ready to boil over any minute. The waves weren’t the calming serenity they were last night, replaced by ones that angrily kissed the sides of the wooden ship and rocked you off balance.
The breeze carried the scent of seawater, and you inhaled greedily, using it to calm your nerves. Why were you nervous, anyway? It was silly to even ask yourself, but maybe you were overthinking Gaz’s intentions. A lack in judgment, something you were worried you made.
You lifted a hand, grazing across the cheek he’d touched just hours ago. If you focused really hard, you could still feel it, and you did your best to ignore the somersaults in your stomach.
Entering the food hall, you were greeted with the sight of the men sitting around one another, feasting on breakfast just as they had done the first time you ate with them. They looked like animals that had never seen food in their life.
How long had it been since you all properly sat down and ate as one? You couldn’t remember.
“Dove!” Soap called out, a smile instantly brightening his face. You cringed at the mess surrounding his mouth.
You failed to notice Ghost stiffening in his seat, as well as Gaz sitting up straighter at light speed. The Captain turned his head to you, greeting you with a warm smile.
“Mornin’, dove,” he said, and you offered a nod, stepping up to the table.
Before Price could offer you a seat, Soap patted the empty one beside him, greedily taking up the attention.
“Yer wearin’ one of the dresses,” Soap awed, taking in the simple details stitched into the fabric.
Having a moment of self consciousness, you awkwardly plucked at one of the stitches, nodding. “It’s not too much, is it?”
“Not at all,” he assured, beaming. “Right, Cap?”
You looked up to meet Price’s eye, who cleared his throat, nodding uncomfortably. He took a swig of his drink before placing it back down, hand lingering around the cup. “Mm. S’nice.”
You shooed away the brief flicker of disappointment that threatened its way in. You were going crazy. Why did you have the urge to seek approval anyway? It was absurd.
Soap was quick to his feet, claiming to grab you some food before he’d be right back. There was an awkward gap in between you and Gaz and when you looked at him, he beat you to it, eyes raking down from your face to take in the dress.
You felt your skin turn warm to the touch.
You quickly averted your attention to Ghost, praying to have a bit of normalcy but he was avoiding you rather than looking at you like Gaz was. His shoulders were tense, gaze laser focused on his bowl of breakfast. You could sense the furrow of his eyebrows, even beneath the mask. There was something about him that seemed lost, deep in thought.
Ghost always looked like that. Today, however, felt different.
“Good morning, Ghost,” you greeted kindly. To your surprise, he said nothing, only giving you a low grunt of acknowledgement that was tinged with a slight bitterness that made your ears hurt.
Frowning, you plucked at the stitch on your dress harder, only stopping when Soap returned with a hefty bowl of fresh breakfast, enough for a family.
“Soap, I do not think I need that much,” you worried, watching him set it down in front of you before plopping next to you.
“Nonsense, bonnie, ye gotta eat up,” he encouraged, pushing the bowl closer to you. “Ye look nice, by the way. I told ye the dresses were pretty.”
“You said pretty?” Gaz asked, raising an eyebrow.
Soap scoffed, waving him away. “Droolin’ like a dog, mind ye. Wipe yer mouth.”
Gaz sputtered, grumbling to himself and finally tearing his eyes away. You grew embarrassed for him.
Reluctantly, you began eating, taking small bites at a time. Soap watched you like a hawk, enough to where Gaz kicked him under the table, muttering a, “who’s droolin’ now?”
“Dove,” Price said, and you perked up. “I’d like to discuss a few things with you later. Would that be alright?”
“Ach, Cap, let the lass eat,” Soap scolded, and quickly slumped down like a kicked puppy when Price threw him a look of warning.
“That will be alright,” you assured, smiling politely. “Is it to do with Graves again?”
Before Price could reply, Ghost slammed his hands flat on the table, pushing himself to a stand. He gave none of you a second glance before he was stomping out of the dining hall, slamming the door aggressively on his way out.
The sound and sight made you recoil, visibly wincing. Ghost had been on edge, and you knew it was slowly building. Graves must have been driving him mad.
Guilt tugged at your heartstrings.
“I’ll go check on ‘im,” Soap mumbled, pulling himself out of his seat and following after Ghost mindlessly.
It wasn’t until it was only you, Price, and Gaz that the tense silence was broken.
“Poor lad,” Gaz murmured to himself, shaking his head and stabbing at his food with his fork.
“What’s happening with him?” you asked, worried.
Price tapped his fingers along the table, lips pursed and eyes stuck on the door. “Nothin’, dove,” he sighed.
You frowned at him. “No. You’re doing it again, Price.”
He turned away from the door and at you, cocking his head. Price frowned back at you before nodding slowly in understanding. “Right,” he muttered. “He is… rather guilty of everythin’ happenin’ with you. Killin’ himself about it, really.”
The irony. Ghost was practically undead until Graves decided otherwise.
“Guilty?” you repeated in surprise. “What is he guilty for?”
Gaz sighed heavily, appearing more tired than he did before. “He thinks you’re cursed ‘cause of him,” he explained. “If you hadn’t been with him that day in the town, Graves never would’ve seen you. He blames himself.”
Your eyes went wide the more he spoke, and you felt your own harboring guilt only grow. You felt sick. Not once had you considered Ghost to be the enemy, the reason for your misfortune. Graves was the only one to blame in the game.
“That is nonsense,” you wavered. “He is not to blame.”
“He thinks so,” Price replied glumly. “Do not take it to heart, dove. He has care for you as we do. He simply struggles with it more.”
You knew Ghost cared in his own strange way. He was emotionally constipated, unable to express himself the way a normal person should. You understood why.
“Should I talk to him about it?” you asked, more so to yourself. You weren’t sure how Ghost would take it. He was a firecracker.
“I think that would be nice, birdie,” Gaz agreed with a warm smile that made you stumble for words. “Don’t expect to get very far, though. He’s a stubborn bastard.”
Price snorted quietly, nodding. You couldn’t help but agree as well. You learned that the hard way.
“We do not have to talk until later,” the captain explained. “Finish up eatin’ and talk to him. See where it goes.”
With that, you made quick work of scarfing down the food Soap graciously piled up for you, eating as much as you can. Price dismissed you, giving you an encouraging smile. Gaz nodded to you as you left, hurrying out of the dining hall to find the doomed man where he hid.
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You weren’t sure where to start, but the first you assumed was his room. He often resided in there by himself, hiding away like an urchin, quiet as a mouse. You’d never been to his quarters, so the thought of entering had you nervous.
The closer you got, the more your heart pounded. At least Soap would be there to ease the tension, perhaps he could even be helpful in opening Ghost up.
Ghost’s quarters were on the other side of the ship, away from Soap and Gaz’s, so when you stepped into the small hall leading to it, you paused when you noticed the door opened.
Faint murmurs could be heard from beyond the doorway, but it wasn’t loud enough to make out.
Creeping up to the door, you peeked your head in, darting your eyes around before they landed on Soap. Then Ghost.
You had to hold back a noise of surprise when you saw Ghost being coddled by Soap, the Scot’s arms encasing him with his lips to Ghost’s ear, speaking softly to him. The embrace was something passionate, almost as if being held by a lover.
The thing you noticed was Ghost free of his mask, the skull token sitting on the floor as if thrown off. The balaclava beneath it was next to it, and you saw the tufts of blonde hair poking out wickedly on Ghost’s head.
His face was marred, littered with brutal scarring and faint black veins that traveled up his neck and to his jaw. His nose was crooked, as if somebody had bashed it in and it never healed it properly. A nasty scar crossed on his mouth, starting from his top lip and finishing at the bottom.
You were looking at Simon. The one who hid beneath the mask as Ghost. And he didn’t even know you saw.
The guilt became only worse when Soap curled a hand under Ghost’s chin, his thumb stroking his textured cheek before leaning in.
You quickly pulled back from the doorway, heart racing. You looked away before you saw anything more, but you knew what was about to happen.
Had this been going on the whole time? Were you oblivious? Did the others know?
Images of them embracing flashing repeatedly in your mind, and you felt trickles of envy. The softness of the moment, to have such intimacy and care shared between one another… It was something you longed for and never knew you wanted.
You longed for a hug. You yearned for affection.
When living in the village, it was something you never desired. You despised the idea of settling down with another and spending your life loving them. Now, you realized that it wasn’t the idea you hated — it was that you never saw anybody in that light.
The realization began to hit you fast and hard. And it didn’t feel as great as you wanted it to.
Just as you were beginning to feel at ease with your place in life, you were lost all over again.
You don’t know how long you stood there. You were in a trance, and just as you snapped out of it to rush out of the hall, Soap stepped out, Ghost trailing behind him. Both of them paused in the doorway.
“Dove?” Soap asked in surprise. “Are ye alright? What are ye doin’ here?”
You startled, forcing yourself to act indifferent. You didn’t want to seem strange, as if you’d been lurking. You didn’t even mean to.
“I just got here,” you lied with a forced smile. “I knew you were speaking, so I was waiting outside until it was okay. I was going to speak to Ghost, if that was alright.”
You risked a glance at Ghost. His mask was back on his face, covering the trauma beneath.
“We’ve got a couple of things to do around the ship,” Soap said apologetically. “Lookin’ like a storm’s comin’ soon. Gotta set everythin’ up so we don’t tip over and drown, aye?”
Soap nudged your shoulder with a snicker. You couldn’t help but feel a bit disappointed and isolated.
“That’s alright,” you murmured quietly.
Ghost eyed you, narrowing in like he didn’t believe you. You swallowed.
“C’mon, lass. Let’s get ye back, aye?” Soap hummed, wrapping an arm around your shoulder. He began to guide you out of the hall.
“Price wanted to speak with me,” you said. “I will just go to his quarters.”
Soap’s eyebrows raised and he let his arm drop, giving you a nod. “Alright, dove. Ye feel okay? Ye look a bit tired. Didn’t sleep well?”
You dismissed it with a hand, forcing a reassuring smile. “I’m quite alright. No stress.”
Soap looked skeptical and he glanced at Ghost, who merely looked away. “Okay,” he huffed, not quite believing you but trusting you regardless. “Go on then.”
You gave the two a farewell, going your separate ways while you walked back to Price’s room. The walk felt slow, your shoes dragging along the old wooden floors. Your anxiety gnawed at you like a pest, your fingers finding that now familiar stitch on your dress to once again pick at.
Your mind was in shambles and you didn’t want Price to notice. How were you to explain what you saw? What if he wasn’t aware of the affair happening between his crew and you ruined it by asking?
You were so engrossed in your own mind that you failed to notice you were already at the door to Price’s. You briefly wondered if he had even returned from the dining hall. He was expecting you to arrive later.
A couple knocks on the door later, Price opened the door. He looked puzzled when he saw you, ushering you inside.
“I take it you didn’t get to talk to Ghost?” he frowned. You shook your head solemnly. “That’s alright. Did somethin’ happen? You look unwell. Was it breakfast? Did it not taste well to you?”
“What? No, breakfast was perfect. Thank you,” you assured. His gaze flickered over your face, studying you. “Ghost and Soap are handling the ship for the storm. The clouds look rather angry, don’t they?”
He knew you were bluffing. He could tell from the way you rambled about the weather of all things.
“Yes, they do,” he agreed suspiciously. Nevertheless, he encouraged you to take a seat at his desk, joining you on his side. A lone cigar sat in his ashtray, unlit, and he grabbed it with nimble fingers to hold it to his mouth and light it with a match.
You watched silently as the smoke began to pour out of his mouth, swirling into wisps in the air.
“The weather always makes me feel a bit uneasy,” he hummed, holding the cigar with two fingers and letting his arm rest on the chair. “Gives me nasty headaches. You got anythin’ that helps with that?”
“Back in my quarters, yes,” you explained. “I still have quite a few balms from my village. I have been meaning to make more. Perhaps I can show you how.”
Price huffed out a laugh, a faint smile hidden in his heard. He took another heavy hit from the cigar, dabbing the excess ash off in the tray. “That would be useful,” he agreed. “I’ve been curious about your skill since you stitched me up so long ago.”
You couldn’t help but smile. The memory at the time was one you weren’t fond of, but now that you look back on it, it wasn’t so bad. You were just scared.
“I have told you from the beginning that I am not a trained medic,” you teased.
“Ach, your stitchin’ job barely left a scar. No need to be so humble.”
You shared quiet laughs before falling into comfortable silence. You allowed him to nurse the cigar until he was ready to speak, but the silence made your mind drift back to what you’d seen moments ago. Curiosity got the best of you.
“Sir?”
“Hm?”
“Are Soap and Ghost… together?”
Price paused, cigar hanging from his mouth. He cocked his head curiously, taking in your question. “Why do you ask?”
You fumbled, wringing your hands in your lap awkwardly. “I am just… wondering.”
He stared at you as if could see right through your deception. “Define, together.”
“I think you know what I mean, sir.”
Price snorted, resting his cheek on his hand. “Does that bother you, dove? Or perhaps you want to join them?”
Your eyes widened and you quickly sputtered out an explanation, shaking your head. “No, not at all!”
Price barked out a laugh, eyes crinkling with it. You chewed on your bottom lip until it felt raw, wishing you hadn’t even asked.
“I am simply teasin’ you. Relax,” he mused, tapping out the cigar. “It is a complicated relationship. Much more complicated than you could assume.”
“Is that so?” you murmured to yourself, wondering. “Complicated how?”
Price’s eyebrows raised and he remained quiet for a moment. “I did not take you to be the type to gossip about love of all things, dove.”
“Please do not jest me.”
Price smiled in amusement. “My apologies, princess,” he taunted. You scowled. “Curiosity killed the cat, don’t you know that?”
“Of course I know that,” you uttered in annoyance at Price’s inconspicuous mockery.
“Unless it is Soap you wish to be with,” he continued.
“I—” You hated how the thought made your heart jump. “It is not!”
“Good,” he said with a smile. You shut your mouth, frowning at him in disapproval. “I was goin’ to speak more with you about Graves, but perhaps Soap was right. You need a break from it for the day. Rather, would you like to show me that medicine makin’ that you mentioned?”
Medicine making? The Captain was a strange man. The strangest of them all. He gave Soap a run for his money.
“I’d much prefer that,” you grumbled, standing so you could return to your quarters to collect things needed to create jars of herbal medicine.
As you walked out with plans of returning, Price called out once more, “Don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me.”
You let out an annoyed groan, slamming the door on your way out. It wasn’t enough to silence his snickering.
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mayghosts · 4 months ago
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enemies to lovers with paige. buuuuut they were used to be best friends but something happened between them
-🎀
Snow Angel: Flurries (1) Paige Bueckers x reader
Summary: How does a class project repair your broken friendship, and how does a friendship turn into something more?
(TOC)
Warnings: unhealthy alcohol usage,
AN: my life is not in shambles anymore! Heres to posting multiple times a week!! I can’t believe I'm writing ANOTHER series??? Hello???
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January 7th, 2024:
Sitting in the back of your Friday afternoon astronomy class, you gazed out the window, letting your eyes drift across the snow covered campus. You always had a hard time focusing in this class, mainly due to the blonde who always sat a few rows away from you. However, today was different. Paige was missing from her regular seat, which you now knew was because of the basketball game against Gerogetown. Her absence seemed to have a similar effect on you as to when she was actually present. Instead of constantly staring at the back of her head and wondering what went wrong, you stared out the window and wondered over and over where did we go wrong?
(Flashback) October 31st, 2022:
“Paigeeeee, are you ready to go?” you giggled, stumbling into your dorm living room and wrapping your arms around her neck. You swayed side to side, already feeling the buzz of the shots you had taken with Nika a few minutes ago. “Jesus, Nika! How many shots did you give her!!” You could hear the concern laced in Paiges voice as she stabilized your hips and unwound your hands from her neck. You melted under her touch, god she was pretty.
You had never been much of a drinker, all throughout highschool when you and Paige would go out to parties she would drink and you would stay sober so you could drive home. However, this year had been hard on you, and lately drinking has been your saving grace after a long day.
You were absolutely hammered by the time the party started winding down. Stumbling around in your cowboy boots and someone elses costume cape, the last thing you remember was clinging to Paiges arm she gently helped you into the back of the Uber.
Waking up the next morning, your head was pulsing and your could already feel the hangover anxiety eating away at your stomach. Squinting your eyes at the light from your phone, you opened your texts. However, you were met with a big paragraph from Nika and a short but tense text from Azzi. Nothing from Paige. Scanning over the texts quickly, you immediately found yourself calling Paige.
Your call going straight to voice mail didn't help the queasy feeling in your stomache at all. 
Slipping out of bed, you dragged your feet into the bathroom to quickly brush your teeth and wash your face. The bathroom tiles were icey cold, even with socks on your feet were freezing. As you scrubbed at the crusted on makeup, you racked your brain to try and remember the events of last night. You slid your slides on, making your way out of your dorm and down the hall to Paige and Nikas dorm. Knocking quietly, you felt the anxiety eating at you again. You heard shuffling before the door opened to reveal a clean and practice ready Nika.
“What are you doing here?” her harsh tone took you by surprise. You blinked absently at her for a moment, “uhh… I just wanted to ask what happened? Last night? And see if Paige is okay, my call to her didn’t go through and-” you could see her getting more irritated as you kept talking before she interrupted you. “She dosen’t want to see you right now okay? And neither do I, you really fucked up last night and honestly your behavior lately has been ridiculous. I need to go to practice and I don’t want to see you again until you can get your shit together.” Pushing past you, she walked straight into the stairwell, letting the dorm door slam behind her.
More confused than ever, you made your way back to your dorm and crawled right back into bed. You knew you weren't really the same person you were when you met them, but you never considered the change to be a bad thing. If anything you were more confident and more comfterable in your body. So what if you go out a few times a week. Honestly, you weren't even sure if that was what she was talking about. Regardless, you spent the next month trying to fix something you didn’t understand. You scoured the texts Azzi and Nika had sent you for any details or clues, but the most you could figure out was that you said something to Paige.
You sent countless texts until yu found out you were blocked. After that you tried emails, Instagram DMs, waiting outside classes, and even tried to befriend the media girl, just for a chance to talk to Paige. However, the blonde was basically untouchable. Between her teammates constantly watching you and her persistence with blocking you on every possible internet platform, you found yourself friendless and worst of all Paige-less.
January 7th, 2024:
You were pulled from your day dream as you heard your professor say your last name “… you will be working with…” he dug his hand around in the little bucket on his desk. You assumed this was for another partner project “Paige Bueckers!” shit.
Stepping out of the lecture hall, you felt a similar sense of dread in your stomach as you dragged your feet towards the dining hall. As you walked you pulled out your phone and started drafting a text to send to Paige. Standing in line for your smoothie, you were once again met with the brutal realization that your were stilll blocked. Guess we can just start on Monday?
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niqhtlord01 · 5 months ago
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Humans are weird: Dealing with zombies
( Please come see me on my new patreon and support me for early access to stories and personal story requests :D https://www.patreon.com/NiqhtLord Every bit helps)
Undead alien horde wanders into town Alien: Run for your lives! Human: Why? Alien: Monsters are coming!!! Alien 2: They can’t be killed! Human: So they’re undead? Alien: Yes!! Human: Goes home and revs chainsaw Fucking finally. ----------------------
Alien: Watches human carving through undead horde Alien: How are you so calm!?! Human: finishes carving through undead Me and my friends used to do stuff like this all the time when we were kids on Friday night. Alien: Are these undead such a problem on your world?! Human: Oh they flare up from time to time, but then the market gets saturated with them and people just lose interest. Alien: What the hells does that even mean!?!?” ---------------------
Alien: What are we going to do? Human: *swipes everything off table and lays out giant map Human: We need to reach the local Costcoooo Mart and seal it up. Human: The walls are at least two feet thick of concrete so we only need to worry about the main doors, emergency exits, and loading bays to seal up. Human: There should be enough fuel there to power generators and supplies to last us a while. Alien: *Looks down at detailed map with several cascading footnotes. Alien: Why do you have this? Human: Have what? Alien: This map…..why do you have it already prepared? Human: Oh, that. Human: Every human has a zombie plan ready; sometimes several. Alien: Really? Human: *Shouts down corridor Human: Yo STEVE! What’s your zombie plan? Steve: *shouts back from down the hall Steve: Take my family to countryside where it is isolated and hold fort on a farm until things blow over. Human: *Turns to alien Human: See? Everyone’s got one. -------------------
*Pair of humans and aliens sneaking through zombie infested streets Human 1: Alright; if we can make it to the train station we should be able to follow the rail lines out of the city. Alien 1: There are too many of them; we’ll never make it through. Alien 2: This will help. Alien 2: *Hefts large plasma pistol. Human 2: Are you crazy?! Human 2: No guns! Alien 1: Why would we not- Zombie: *Lurches over to them and groans Alien 2: *Panics and fires plasma pistol. *Zombie is cut in half by the weapon blast but the loud boom attracts every zombie in surrounding area towards them Human 2: That…..That is why genius.. -----------------------
Alien: Why do you prefer using melee weapons? Human: Because they don’t run out of ammo, are relatively quiet, and you look badass while using them. Alien: Really? Alien: You are using a cricket bat. Human: Badass right? Alien: To quote a human saying. Alien: “You look like a wanker.” --------------------
Alien: Why do the undead keep falling down? Human: *Watches zombies step forward and fall down Human: God bless undertakers. Alien: Huh? ---------------------
Alien: How can you be so calm about this? Human: They’re only human zombies, nothing to be worried about. Alien: Only…. Alien: What do you mean by that? Human: The real shit hits the fan when the animals start turning zombie. Alien: Like? Human: Zombees. Alien: What? Human: Zombie bees; Zombees. -----------------------
Alien: I’m still surprised you have a functioning vehicle during these times. Alien: Let alone one with such a lovely shade of red. Human: Well to be fair it was white this morning? Alien: Really? What happened then? Human: Speed bumps. Alien: Speed bumps? Human: So many speed bumps. ---------------------
*Zombie horde approaches Alien: Don’t worry, I got this! Human: Wait don- Alien: *Uses flame thrower on zombies Human: You idiot, that does not kill zombies! Alien: What?! *Sees flaming zombies now shambling towards them Human: Damnit you’re just making them deadlier! -----------------------
Alien: So you are saying I shouldn’t wear armor? Human: Some armor, but nothing heavy. Alien: Why? Alien: They wouldn’t be able to get through heavy armor. Human: True, but when they swarm you and drag you down you won’t be able to push them off. Human: So you’ll either starve or have them eventually rip the armor off you and eat you slowly. Alien: Why do I feel like you have debated this before? Human: It’s a tale as old as time…. -------------------------
Alien: We’re surrounded. Alien: *Looks down at dog. Human: Why are you looking at my dog like that? Alien: If we set the dog loose it’ll attract zombies and we can escape. Human: Ah, no. Human: We are not sacrificing my fluffy boy. Alien: But- Human: One more word and I’ll throw you to them instead. Alien: Surely you wouldn’t. Human: *Cocks pistol Human: It’s a gamble you will lose. Human: *Scratches top of dog’s head
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smolkooks · 4 months ago
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incoming call... - kenji sato.
a/n: 2k words of one of my late night thoughts turned into a fluffy, exes to lovers fic. exes au, vet!y/n x kenji sato from ultraman: rising.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚
“kenji?”
“y/n?”
you hadn’t expected to run into him here, and it seemed that he hadn’t either, from the way he was dressed. contrary to how you usually saw him on t.v. during his interviews, he was in shambles. kenji sato was dressed in a sweatset, stained with what smelled like...fish juice?...down the front. his eyes were dim, yet panicked—perhaps at seeing you, but you weren’t sure. was his hair...wet? what the fuck?
it had been more than eight years since you’d last seen him—at highschool graduation, when you’d moved to sydney for university, and he’d disappeared to the states. not that kenji sato could disappear, with how often you saw him on your t.v. screen.
“what...what are you doing here?” he stuttered, furrowing his annoyingly perfect brows. he looked exactly as you remembered, save for his current, unorganised state. just...older. better.
“well, i just got off work,” you said equally as awkwardly, gesturing at your scrubs, “um...just, heading home now.”
truth be told, this was an insanely random place to have run into him. ten minutes from your apartment block, with no shopping districts around or really any reason for him to be here at all. all that there was in your district was a river, which was nearby—so close you could still hear it from here.
“you walk?” he said incredulously, eyes fixated on your badge—dr. y/n, head veterinarian.
“uh, yeah,” you said, shifting a bit under his sharp gaze as his dark eyes shifted to meet yours. the same way he’d looked at you, all those years ago, that day. sad, but hopeful.
ken, we should...i mean, i think we should break up.
the words were as clear in your memory as day, and you forced yourself to swallow and block out those intruding thoughts.
“let me drive you,” he said quietly, after a beat, and as you opened your mouth to protest that you only lived ten minutes away, he said, “please.”
“kenji, you look really tired,” you said hesitantly, “you should head home and rest.”
“trust me,” he said with a sigh, “there’s no rest to be found in my home right now.”
you wondered what that meant. but he didn’t give you any time before he abruptly gestured down the street and wordlessly began walking you towards his car.
if you’d asked yourself twenty minutes ago, you wouldn’t have believed that you would be sitting in your highschool boyfriend’s 300-thousand-dollar porsche. and yet, here you were, buckled into the passenger seat, feeling more awkward than ever as you typed your address into his phone.
“i thought you were in sydney, to be honest,” he said, finally breaking the silence as he started the car, sweeping his hair back with his other hand.
“i moved back a year ago,” you explained as you propped his phone up on the stand he had for it, pressing start on the google maps directions, “worked in sydney for three years after grad, then got a job offer to be promoted to head vet back here in japan. couldn’t pass it up. besides, my mum’s here and i wanted to be with her.”
“you don’t live with her, though?” he said. of course, he’d noticed that your address had changed. he had spent more hours at your house than he’d probably spent at school in all six years of secondary school combined.
“yeah, i wanted my own place,” you said with a soft laugh, “i’ve got a few pets. they would drive her mad, with how loud they are.”
kenji huffed, “kids can be so damn loud.”
that caught you off guard, and you turned to him, shocked, and if not a little embarrassed. of course, kenji already had kids! he was a young, extremely wealthy man who of course would’ve married by now. you’d done well for yourself, but you knew you couldn’t compare to kenji sato.
“kids?” you couldn’t help yourself, the sharp question slipping out before you could process and revealing your surprise.
“uh—it’s complicated,” he said quickly, “wait, that sounds wrong—not that it’s complicated, just—well, she’s not really my kid—,”
“so you’re a stepdad,” you asked, confused.
“not really,” he replied, one hand running through his hair again, messing it up more, “she’s my pet, i guess. pet...lizard.”
your eyes lit up, “oh my god, i love lizards. i wish i could have one, too—maybe a gecko? but i have too many cats right now.”
“i wish i had a cat, instead,” kenji rolled his eyes, “she’s so whiney.” but there was affection tucked in his voice, and you picked up on it even without having to see his half-smile in the mirror.
“i’ll have to visit, then, to see your lizard.”
“and you, your cats,” he shot back as he parked by the curb, “you weren’t lying when you said you lived close by.”
you laughed, “why would i lie?”
he shrugged in response.
“get back safe,” you said, as you stepped out and reached to shut the door, “thank you for the ride. it was really nice to catch up.”
“yeah—well, you too,” he said, biting his lip as he seemed like he wanted to ask something else—you knew that look on his face better than anyone.
“what? spit it out,” you said jokingly, narrowing your eyes.
“oh...” he chuckled nervously, “um, can i have your number? yknow, your new one.”
you were caught off guard by him, yet again. “sure. it’s the same as it was. has yours changed?”
“yeah, actually...gotta change mine a lot, these days,” he looked really embarrassed by that, “what with the baseball stuff. i’ll call you. we need to catch up properly.”
i missed you. his eyes seemed to say, and something in your stomach fluttered at his earnest expression.
“we do,” you replied, before shutting the door, “see you, kenji.”
he waited until you’d headed upstairs before he drove off.
***
incoming call...unknown caller id.
“what the...?” you rubbed your eyes as your vibrating phone woke you up from your afternoon nap. you’d taken a fond liking to naps these days, after taking on so many emergency late night shifts at the clinic.
groggily, you picked up the phone and immediately was met with the sound of heavy breathing, which creeped you out, truth be told, and just as you were reaching to hang up on the creep, a familiar voice rasped out, “y/n, help me.”
“what the fuck? kenji?” you shot upright, panicked at his desperate tone, “what’s wrong?”
“are you free, right...now?”
“uh, well—i guess? i just got back from work, so...”
“sorry,” he said quickly, “to bother you. i’m just having trouble with my...lizard...and i didn’t know who else to ask. i can pay you—as much as you want—or—,”
“no, kenji, it’s fine,” you cut him off smoothly, “don’t be ridiculous. where are you? i did say i wanted to meet your lizard, anyway.”
***
you should’ve expected that kenji sato would live in a district as boujee as this. the buildings seemed to rise higher than your eyes could see, going all the way up into the clouds that shrouded the twilight sky. the cars here were all black and silver, with tinted, dark windows. it felt like a different world to your neighbourhood, and yours was already the nicer of the bunch.
“kenji, i think i’m here, but i don’t know how to get up,” you said into your phone, confused by all the security mechanisms and fancy technology that surrounded the large glass door before you. plus, your hands were pretty occupied—your phone squished between your cheek and shoulder, one hand holding your first aid kit—reptile-specialised—and the other your coat and bag of other equipment that you felt like you might need, if his lizard was in such bad condition that he’d called you up out of nowhere.
“give me a sec, i’m coming.”
as promised, the very man appeared moments later, looking just slightly more put together than the last time you’d seen him. at least this time, his hair was dry.
“thanks for coming,” he said hastily as he let you in, leading you to the set of elevators that awaited you, “i...i didn’t know who else to call. i really don’t know that many people here i’d want to talk to, and i’ve been really lonely lately, it’s kinda...sorry, i’m ranting, but i’m going through it and...anyway, i’m glad to see you.”
you found his ranting kind of endearing. you knew it was something he only did when he was really nervous—just like he’d always done, even when you two were just kids—and it made you feel young again, talking to him. like you were talking to your very first crush.
well, you supposed in a way, you were.
in the elevator, he was largely silent, although you could sense his stress—as if he had something to tell you but was too scared, his leg bouncing and fidgeting nonstop with the bottom of his shirt.
finally, as he went to swing open his apartment door opened, he blurted out, “don’t freak out.”
when you looked inside, you understood why.
and it was too late, because you were already freaking out. you dropped all your supplies in your shock, eyes widening and feet stumbling backwards.
“kenji, what—what is that—,”
there was a gigantic lizard before you. a gigantic one, and when you said gigantic, you meant it. it was at least...ten times bigger than you, and you’d never seen anything like that, before.
“um...emi...she’s a kaiju,” he said sheepishly, wringing his hands.
“what the—,”
“a baby!” he said quickly, “and i raised her, so she’s just a little cutie. but...you know, she’s growing up and i think she’s going through puberty or something. i don’t know! she’s just really struggling emotionally these days and i can’t figure it out. i’m her dad and i can’t figure it out and i’m not home often enough to look after her twenty-four-seven. please give me a chance. i’ll pay you—i’ll do whatever.”
“uh, kenji,” you said cautiously, leaning down to pick your stuff up, “you know that i know nothing about kaiju, right?” he leant down beside you to help you, cheeks tinted pink.
“it’s okay, can you try?”
“i can try, i guess,” you said dubiously, but you had to admit that you were at least curious. you’d never been this close to a kaiju before, and if anything, they were still animals of some sort. you wanted to see. you wanted to learn.
you didn’t really hear kenji’s blurted out thanks as you carefully crept closer to the sleeping pink creature, knocked out completely, curled up on her side. pulling out a stethoscope, you started to gently listen to her heartbeat from her wrist—the closest part of her you felt safe enough to touch, and she stirred, but didn’t wake.
it sounded normal—you guessed. for a creature as big as her, you supposed her heart rate would be really slow. especially when sleeping.
you did all your checks without her really waking, and that was ideal—you’d prefer she didn’t. as much as kenji reassured you that she was harmless, you were dubious that a creature this big wouldn’t hurt you.
“kenji,” you said, after you were done, unpacking some of your medications, “she’s growing up. she’s hitting prepubescence, you’re right. but also, she’s sick.”
“w-what do you mean? she’s—,”
“she has a cold,” you explained, and his panic deflated slightly as you gave him the largest bottle you had in your supplies, “you can give these to her. this’ll only last her today, so you’ll have to buy a shit ton of this medication, but i’ll give you a prescription and the phone of my supplier so you can get it fast. she should be okay in a week or so. but then again, she’s a kaiju, so it may take longer, depending.”
when you looked up, kenji was looking at you deeply, so earnestly and so gratefully, the bottle of pills set on the kitchen bench beside the two of you. you were closer to him than you’d been for years—even closer than that day on the car. suddenly, you were hyper aware of the way you swallowed as you met his gaze, your heart rate quickening.
“thank you, y/n,” he said quietly, “i...” he didn’t come closer, but he glanced down at his own hands before looking back up, “i really missed you, you know.”
“i missed you too, kenji,” you breathed, in disbelief a bit at the way you felt—just like you used to feel whenever he looked at you. you hoped he couldn’t hear how quick and heavily your heart was pounding ink your chest.
he broke out into a warm smile, “i’m really glad i ran into you, that night.”
***
incoming call...kenji sato.
you couldn’t help the smile that broke across your face as you reached for your buzzing phone.
“hello?”
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love-belle · 1 year ago
Text
i'm glad whenever i can share her laughter !!!
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ in which they finally get their picture perfect ending that everyone was hoping for.
or
for when you have everything you ever wished for. ˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚
social media au // charles leclerc x fem!reader
warnings - language
author's note - this series is now officially done!!!! im soooo happy about how this turned out and i hope u enjoyed it as much as i did <33 thank u sm for reading, i love you <33
≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱
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liked by charles_leclerc, carlossainz55, lilymhe and 2,751,876 others
yourusername julianne marie leclerc-y/l/n 🤍
tagged charles_leclerc
15,628 comments
username OMG SHE'S HEREEEE
username GOING CRAZY RN WDYM THE BABY IS HERE
username JULIANNE 😭 MARIE 😭 LECLERC-Y/L/N 😭
lewishamilton missing baby j ❤️
-> yourusername she misses her uncle lew and brother roscoe ❤️
username SO ADORABLE ARE U KIDDING ME
lilymhe i'm kidnapping her idc
-> alex_albon yes please i miss her already
-> yourusername no bc im pretty sure she loves u both more than her actual PARENTS
landonorris can i come over
-> yourusername u JUST left
-> landonorris CAN I COME OVER
-> yourusername ok
charles_leclerc mon ange 😘 ( my angel )
-> yourusername ❤️
charles_leclerc thank you for everything mon amour ( my love )
-> yourusername thank YOU for everything i love u sooooosososo bad
username i feel like such a proud parent it's INSANE
username IM CRYING OMG
≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱
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liked by yourusername, landonorris, danielricciardo and 2,699,896 others
charles_leclerc it should be noted that she asked for her "mamamamama" a few thousand times and now i'm taking her with me to where ever
tagged yourusername
14,885 comments
username MAMAMAMAMA PLEASE
username she's a mama's girl fr
username JULIE 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
danielricciardo baby julie owns my heart
-> heidiberger_ mine too 🤍
-> charles_leclerc where was this heart owning when she was screaming her head off in the middle of the night and you both suddenly had a "fever"
-> username PLEASE HE PULLED OUT THE RECEIPTS
-> username he's really done with everyone
maxverstappen1 p wants to meet her best friend. again. please.
-> charles_leclerc can we exchange?
-> maxverstappen1 yes
-> kellypiquet no (you are more than welcome to leave baby j with us anytime ☺️)
-> yourusername no (I MISS P PLEASE COME OVER)
-> charles_leclerc ONE CHILD IS ENOUGH
-> maxverstappen1 exactly what he said
username i love watching charles realise that having a baby is SO much more than js buying cute clothes and playing with toys
-> yourusername i know he's so shocked
yourusername MY BABY 😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️
-> charles_leclerc she's coming with me
yourusername bring her back asap i wanna hug her
-> charles_leclerc oh so suddenly i'm not enough?
yourusername u didn't hear this from me but she couldn't sleep without her red ferrari plushie last week when u were in maranello
-> charles_leclerc so now you're making me cry. great.
≡;- ꒰ °instagram stories ꒱
yourusername added to their instagram stories
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≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱
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liked by yourusername, carlossainz55, pierregasly and 2,657,246 others
charles_leclerc i'm glad whenever i can share her laughter
tagged yourusername
15,172 comments
username WHY IS SHE GROWING UP SO FAST
username oh please no im not ready to see baby j grow up
leclerc_pascale bébé ❤️❤️❤️ ( baby )
-> charles_leclerc she misses her grand-mère❤️ ( grandmother )
carlossainz55 please stop blasting slipping through my fingers. it's 3am.
-> charles_leclerc she pulled herself up today YOU DON'T GET IT
-> username oh this man's gonna be in shambles when she starts walking
landonorris time needs to stay still, thank you.
-> charles_leclerc exactly 💯
yourusername babe she's literally 10 months old
-> charles_leclerc soon she'll be 10 years old and going to school and not wanting to hang out with me 🙁
yourusername STOP CRYING I CAN HEAR YOU FROM NEXT DOOR
-> charles_leclerc I'M NOT IT'S LANDO
-> landonorris I MISS BABY J
yourusername she misses her papa, come back
-> charles_leclerc yes ❤️❤️❤️ let me just console lando and we'll join you
username lando is so me
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foldingfittedsheets · 8 months ago
Text
In the bloom of my youth I found myself on an evening with my best friend in the park. We were young and it was a beautiful warm summer night to be out. At sixteen in a small rural town our options for entertainment were limited but it had been a good day.
Park is a somewhat generous term for the locale, what it amounted to was a cleared space with some planters and bushes, a tiny podium, and a square of trees round the perimeter. We had been hanging about with our friend who needed to leave, and waiting to be picked up ourselves, carless plebeians that we were.
So there we were, two teen girls in the park alone as the last of the light faded. Neither of us had cellphones, and my nana was collecting us right from the park as we’d agreed earlier. We were in no hurry, knowing she’d arrive when she arrived.
Until my friend said, “What was that?”
I looked up to where she was pointing but I didn’t see anything. “What?” I asked.
“I think it was… someone streaking?”
It was absurd to think. Our little town, tiny and rural as it was, with a streaker. But I loved my friend, so instead of laughing I said, “Let’s go see.”
I’m not sure what I thought it was, but I was confident she’d be less nervous if we investigated and found a plastic bag or a jogger in white. And I’ll admit I was curious at this anomaly. We made our way across the park to where she’d pointed.
That’s when I saw it too. A flash of pale skin under the streetlights, moving too quickly through the shadows and shrubs to see clearly. My friend clung to my arm, shrinking in on herself and I felt the first twitch of fear. Investigating no longer seemed like the thing to do.
I was determined to protect her from whatever was lurking, so I changed course and started cutting away from the movement, heading for the small shopping center not too far outside the park.
Our progress was suddenly arrested as the mysterious figure launched into our path. A man crouched on the pavement before us, fully nude except for a loincloth. His hair was in white people dreads. It was in every way like Tarzan had stepped out of the animated movie into real life.
My friends fingers were digging painfully into my arm and we stood stock still, staring at this bizarre apparition. He was still a good fifteen feet away from us. He stared back, making soft simian “ooh ooh” sounds.
I was struggling to process that a man in a loin cloth was right there when he started to move toward us. It was in his monkey half crouch, a few shambling steps, slow, with his eyes fixed on us.
“Leave us alone!” I declared.
He stopped, tilting his head this way and that. Then shifted like he would take another step.
I was fully afraid now, but I was also furious that he was menacing us and scaring my friend. I dropped her arm, marching forward with wrath in my eyes and said, “Get out of here before we call the cops!”
At my approach he turned and bolted back into the bushes. I whipped around and zipped back toward my friend, grabbing her arm and power walking us out of there. We arrived at the nearest business and darted inside, conveying what had just happened in garbled snippets.
The workers were outraged to hear our story. They let me call my nana to tell her where we were, then asked if we’d like to call the police. I shook my head. I emphatically did not want to deal with the police.
In the safety of the store my fear had started to feel ridiculous. It was probably just some bored prankster.
As we waited for my nana my friend quietly admitted she would rather liked to have called the cops. I apologized for not asking. We lapsed into silence. She said, “I can’t believe you went toward him.”
I couldn’t either. I didn’t remember planning on it, only I wanted to be between him and my friend. “Do you think he was crazy or was it just a prank?”
She shook her head. She didn’t know either. All these years later I still don’t really know what happened that night. If he was on a dare, or cosplaying Tarzan for fun, or if he was unwell. A lot of the details have hazed over with time but the utter dissonance of seeing a man in a loin cloth pop out of the bushes is seared into me.
I also remember back then, in a whisper both scandalized and fascinated, my friend admitting, “I saw his penis.”
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madamechrissy · 21 days ago
Text
Silent Serenades
♔ An arranged Marriage with Duke Gojo ♔
♔ Pairings: Satoru Gojo x you, you x Nanami
♔ Warnings: Heavy, heavy fucking angst, jealousy, cunnilingus, fingering, sex, cheating on your side (reader's) surprise Satoru isn't a hoe for once! Toxic attraction, Gojo is toxic, reader is toxic. OOC. SO MUCH TENSION. Say hello to Mr. Nanami again. SLOW BURN remember that.
♔ Word count this chap: 9k
♔ Summary: you are the diamond of the season, he is the charming Duke, it’s the marriage of the decade. Prominent families joining, and it so happens that Duke Gojo is gorgeous. But, he doesn't want you, and now you're trapped in a loveless arranged marriage. Royal AU, dark Bridgerton vibes, Cruel Gojo x reader. OOC Set in 1800s England. Slow burn, enemies to lovers. Gojo is awful at first, HEAVY angst Basically- Gojo is a royal dick and doesn't wanna marry you
Comments/ reblogs always appreciated 🥰
Part Seven - Masterlist - Playlist
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Part Eight- A Proposition
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The Next Week
“What are we baking today, Mr. Nanami?” You ask teasingly, as your fluffy little puppy snuggles up on a little blanket Nanami folded, snacking on a ham bone Nanami had rather happily. Nanami chuckles as he unlaces your corset a bit, pecking little brushes of his lips on your neck.
“Muffins today, darling. The lawyer is coming in a couple hours, I figure we can have some tea and muffins ready. He’s a very nice man, also, a good friend of mine for years. Mmm, why do you smell so delectable?” Nanami inhales you right at the crook of your neck.
“You always say that, I am not sure, perhaps the bath essence I use.” He just hums, tying an apron around you, pecking more kisses on your cheeks, on your temple, as you fall into him.
“No, you smell better than usual. Maybe I missed you all week.” He whispers, hands pressing into your hips now, over the thin layers of your soft muslin gown, you exhale, body reacting to him, igniting under his firm touch.
“I missed you, Kento.” You turn then, blushing as he presses you back against him, you’re still nervous about making love again, so worried because last time it had hurt. You do not know if it will hurt again, even if it was pleasurable, you find yourself just a little nervous.
“You know we don’t have to do anything but bake, right darling?” You bite your lower lip, reaching back to brush your fingers across his cheek, feeling his light stubble prickly on your fingers.
“I am a little afraid, it did hurt and was a little uncomfortable… but I want to try again.” Nanami sighs, pecking a kiss on your lips softly, lips thankfully healed from Satoru Gojo’s bites.
You and Satoru had done nothing, you both have not even spoken, not since he came home that night, and you fully expected him to bring women home, but he’d been mostly locked up in his office. You’d walked by one night and his face had collapsed onto the desk. You only know through servant gossip that his Father had left many estates in shambles.
You both ate without a word, he would glance at you here and there, with cold blue eyes, but you enjoyed the silence, you enjoyed being able to compartmentalize your feelings, which were so jumbled for this man. You contemplate if you had any feeling at all, or if it was just inexperience and passion, and now you’re fully ready to take this dive.
To end this marriage.
You frequently find Satoru in your room, caressing your cheek, tucking you in your bed as you had that one time, you do not reciprocate, you do not react, let him be confusing and stupid, let him be lonely. What does it matter to you? The only reason you had not seen Nanami was a busy schedule of appearances as ‘the Duchess’ , a title you will not have soon.
This morning, Nanami had been very clear with his intentions.
“When I leave, I wonder where I will go? I think we have an estate out of town I could stay in…” You murmured to Nanami earlier, and he scoffed, cupping your face, lips a breath away.
“You will stay with me, love. How could you think I’d help and not offer you to stay?”
“But it would be so scandalous!”
“So we go to Gretna Green and marry.”
You blink at that, eyes wide. “Marry me? Are you… Kento, are you so sure about this?”
“I’m very serious. When have I not been?” You had exhaled, as your puppy happily ran around both your legs, and Nanami picked him up, smiling, as you do.
“You two are adorable together. I suppose we would make a cute family.” He smirks then, touching your stomach carefully.
“Darling I need more than a puppy, I’m afraid I’d have to put a little bun in this oven. When you’re ready.” You’d been reduced to a blushing mess, touching his hand, snuggling with him and the puppy. “Is it too bold?”
“You ask the lady who said ‘take me’ what is bold?” He chuckles, as you giggle, and you both had gently kissed.
A marriage, babies…
“I am not rich, but I am well off, but I promise I would give you all a good life. I would work so hard for it.” Nanami says softly, and you feel your eyes misty with emotions.
“I have no doubt of this, Kento.”
You never have to wonder what Nanami wants, the man says it, he does not go back and forth in a stupid, endless cycle, he is bold and forthright with you. You gasp when his hand slips back around to your tummy, you exhale, shivering a bit in his hold, as you all stand in his little kitchen.
“Will I get pregnant? From…” It’s his turn to blush, clearing his throat.
“No, I um… remember when I pulled out?” You turn to him, holding his hands and shyly looking down at your slippered feet.
“When you… on my tummy?” You croak out, and he nods then, brushing your hair back off your neck.
“Yes, darling, that was so you would not become pregnant. I would not put you in such a position, especially before we are to marry. We do not know how long the proceedings of the annulment will take.”
“So how do… how does someone… get pregnant?” You ask cautiously, and he clears his throat, taking a breath, thumbs brushing the backs of your knuckles.
“Well, I would cum inside you.”
“I’m confused.”
He laughs softly, tilting your chin up, kissing the tip of your nose. “I would not spill my seed on you, but in you.”
Your body heats up at the thought, and you find yourself shifting your thighs. Nanami notices this with a quirk of his lips, his hazel eyes narrowing. “That sounds most intimate, Sir.”
“It is very much so, I have not done that with a woman. But you seem as if you like the idea.” You bury your face shyly in his chest.
“Hush, you tease me Sir.” He moans ever so lightly, rubbing his hands up and down your back as he holds you.
“You’re adorable to tease, do you blame me Duchess?”
“I will soon not be Duchess.” You murmur, and he smiles against your temple as he holds onto you. “But I will still be darling of course.”
“Of course you will be. So I think we rushed the first time, I did not work you up enough, that’s my thoughts on why it was uncomfortable. You know the prior times where I spent more attention on you?” You nod against him. “Well perhaps I got too excited, like a boy in leading strings with his first.”
“Did you get so excited?” You tease back, and he sighs, kissing you softly, mouth hot and hungry, you whine softly into it, body reacting to his careful caresses.
“I did, I beat myself up all week, I could have made it much better, but you looked so sexy I lost it.”
“Oh, Kento it was still so good!”
“No, not as good as it could have been. Now you’re worried-”
“Not at all!”
“You are. It will not be painful again, but also I’ll make sure she’s fully ready, I promise, love.” You whine out softly again when he’s kissing you, holding you so close, picking you up for a moment. “Mmm, only if you want to try again. I can wait, however long you need.”
“Kento, I am not patient, you know.” You run your hands down his chest, and he grins at that, white teeth flashing.
“Darling, you must bake with me first.”
“Oh, the muffins, yes! Let me show you my skills, Sir.” You and Kento set to work now, and he’s adding ingredients as you’re stirring them up in a bowl, wrist turning as you work the spatula. Soon you all fall into a comfortable side by side, you’re licking batter off one of his fingers, and he’s lapping up powdered sugar from your nose with a laugh.
It’s quiet in Nanami’s apartments, it’s so sweet in it's quiet too, as you both are softly speaking here and there, and you’re pouring the batter into the little paper cups. Was this happiness, enjoying his company, feeling comfortable, feeling so special doing the most basic things? Not feeling conflicted, cold, that bottomless pit of despair that was your husband.
“Perfect, as always, love.” Nanami says then, and you grin up at him, watching his hazel eyes glint as they crinkle at the corners.
“They are going to be so delicious!” You agree, measuring and smoothing out each muffin, and then Nanami is taking off your apron carefully, hanging it up and then doing the same with his own.
“Something else here is delicious.” He whispers, cupping your chin in his hand, and you flush, his intent hitting hard.
“Oh indeed, Sir? Are you sure?” He hums to himself, slipping your skirts up your legs and thighs then, eyes locked on yours as he watches your eyes flutter shut when he finds your heat over your pantalets.
“I’m very sure. I think it’s… over here…” He slips his middle finger under your waist band, and you’re trembling, growing slick under his expert touch, so gentle as it strokes your slit.
“Th-there? You… um… sure?” He laughs softly, swirling his finger, his other hand gripping your backside.
“Let’s taste-test.” He pulls his finger back, sucking on the tip now, and you yank him down to you then, clinging to his strong shoulders, tip toeing as you kiss. “See, so yummy.”
“Is it now?” You bite your lower lip now, as he’s picking you up in his arms, kissing you over and over, and you melt into him, into this sweet, sexy man. A perfect man.
When he’s got you on the edge of his bed, he’s gently undressing you, exhaling at each revealed part of your skin, hands trailing down your shoulders, your breasts, thumbs playing your nipples, which respond eagerly. You’re still in your white stockings and garter belt, bare everywhere else, when he kneels between your thighs, sucking on a nipple.
“Mmm!” You cry out, as he’s looking up at you, adoringly, but there’s something that fucks with you, Satoru Gojo’s stupid blue eyes, so obsessively staring at you, as he’s furious of what you’ve done. As he called you a whore and choked you, biting your lips bloody. Why did your body respond like that!?
You know he is horrible, but you also know he has been with no one since that night, even your Nan had commented, and here you are, letting Nanami touch you, see you fully, Satoru had barely seen you, you had never seen him, his body. You’d done less with your husband by far than with Nanami.
And Satoru deserves that, and you don’t deserve his cruelty, why should you suffer endlessly if you could instead feel happy, feel desire, feel loved? When you just feel so good for once, it’s like with Nanami it’s as easy as a beautiful morning, like some lovely picnic at the park, and with Satoru Gojo, that Duke, it was like being plunged into the Atlantic ocean.
Freezing cold.
How could Satoru be so cold, yet when he touched you it was like fire that spread all over? You shake those thoughts off, it’s not as if anything could or should ever come from those feelings, for once Satoru leaves you alone, and you get a blissful reprieve from such endless sorrow, though you’re still a stranger in that manor. Soon, maybe you’d have a home.
A real home, something comfortable. Nanami’s apartments are perhaps two rooms in Gojo Manor, but they feel so lovely, so cozy. Nanami feels so good as he’s kissing you, his lips drinking you in, as your hands entangle in his soft locks, feeling the blunt ends of his cut, he’d just gone to the barber today, grinning as he’d taken his hat off and shown you.
You’d do anything to keep a smile on Nanami’s face, and never hurt this man again, to give your full self and heart into it. Your eyes roll back when he finds you again, your eager pussy, hips rocking up for more of his rough hands, but gentle touches, and his lips part as he watches you, as he’s pushing a thick finger in your little hole.
“Mmm, s’good Ken!” You cry out, and he pauses, smiling a bit, pecking kisses down the side of your face.
“Ken, hmm? Do I have a nickname darling?” You smile at him, nodding then, before gasping in pleasure as he presses on that spot.
“Of course you do. Don’t I have a nickname?” He exhales, spreading your thighs apart now, hands on your waist as he pushes you to lay back, you’re gasping as he’s flicking his tongue on your clit, still using that finger. “Kento!”
“Mmm, I like Ken. Use it, darling.” He teases with a grin, and you giggle but it’s cut off when he’s swirling your clit with the tip of his tongue, and he’s spreading you wide, moaning against your pussy, and you’re feeling that heat build. You’re writhing under him, and he’s humming against you. “That’s it, love. Good girl.”
At that, you’re soaring even higher, as he’s looking up at you with that lazy gaze, lavishing your every inch, focusing on your clit more and more, and you’re clinging to him tightly, “Ken… going to…”
“Mmm, yes love.” He says softly, and diving back down, then you’re cumming all over his handsome face, and he’s still licking you, in little circles, drawing more wetness. Then he is smacking kisses on the lips of your sex, sliding up, his chin glistening, making you blush.
“Ken.” You say softly, reaching down to feel him over his trousers, so thick and hard already, and your tummy clenches, still so nervous. You don’t know if you made the right decision last time, so upset, now with a week of clarity you hope you’re more prepared emotionally.
“We do not have to do more, I could just do that, you know.” He says then, ever the gentleman Nanami is. You pull out his length, exhaling and kissing his tip, looking up at him then, and his eyes flutter shut, jaw clenching as you swirl your tongue around him, sucking him into your mouth. “Darling, you’re so good. You’re… you’ve only… with me?”
You pause then, blinking, as Nanami’s holding you back a bit. “I have not done this with anyone.”
“Not even him?” He asks then, and you back away, legs closing, tears pricking your eyes, making Nanami curse, covering his eyes with his hand now. “Fuck, please forget I asked that.”
“I have not done that with him. I know I hurt you telling you what he’s done, I feel horrible still. Maybe I should check on those muffins?” You stand then, and he grabs your shoulders carefully, pulling you against him.
“Please, I’m sorry. I know I can’t be this way, but the thought of him with you makes me so sick. I want you all to myself.” He whispers, kissing you once more, and you exhale, understanding him, how could he be okay with you still living with Gojo, why wouldn’t he worry? “That was wrong of me to do. Now you’re wanting to just leave my bed and you look so pretty on it.”
You look down now, swallowing, your throat dry as you try to focus. “Perhaps we should not go so far if you’re still hurting from me having done something with him?”
“No, no, fuck I want you so badly I cannot think of anything else.” He whispers, cupping your face gently, tilting your face up to look at him, feeling his passion with every breath, and you feel so fucking awful, how can you even be with someone like Nanami Kento? When you have thoughts of Satoru Gojo, he should be upset, you had so easily betrayed Nanami.
You will not even be with Gojo, stay with him.
You must shove the thoughts away.
“I have not done anything but kiss him once since you and I were intimate, and he angrily kissed me. Clearly upset. That’s what I do, I hurt people.” You whisper, feeling emotions stuck in your throat, unable to look at him, at his sweet expression and handsome features. It is what you do, you hurt Nanami, you hurt Satoru, even if he is horrible.
You hurt yourself.
You try to pull back, as you now are too worried of hurting him, your sweet Nanami, and you can tell the toll it takes on him. Nanami doesn’t let you leave his embrace, however, he’s pulling your naked body closer, cupping your face with one hand, eyes glimmering with his own emotion.
“You do not hurt me. I should not have asked.” His brows knit together, and you shake your head.
“You should ask, and I hate that you have to. It’s hurting me to see the pain on your face.” You say brokenly, and Nanami kisses you then, more passionate than he usually does, more intense now, lips firm against yours. You inhale him, that soft sandalwood mixing with the blueberry muffins you all make, intoxicating, and you feel him so strong, so sure.
“Please forget this moment. Let me make it up to you.” He asks pleadingly, and you shake your head.
“It’s fine, I promise. No need to make anything up to me, it’s just how you feel.” You brush his hair back with a tremulous little smile, looking up at him, then gasping as he’s picked you up again, laying you in his bed, sinking between your thighs, making you gasp.
“I’m not done with you just yet, darling.” He’s kissing down your neck, and you moan softly as he licks and sucks that spot behind your ear, and you’re shivering in pleasure, in desire. “I’m sorry I lost it around you just a bit, how can I not want you for just me?”
He’s gripping you tighter with those big hands, and you’re falling apart under his touch. “S’okay, Ken. Express yourself, don’t be afraid of speaking your- ah- feelings, it’s- ngh!”
He’s biting your neck now, hands sliding down your thighs, pulling one up over his arm, as he leans up and looks down at you, sandy hair falling over a brow. You bite your lower lip under his intense study of you, your breasts heaving up and down, nipples pronounced and aching.
“I fear I’ll scare you away, pretty Duchess.” You shake your head, brushing that hair back, pecking a kiss on his chin. “I crave for me to be the only man for you, the only one to touch you.”
“Oh, Ken- ah!” He’s pressing against your entrance now, exhaling, his eyes locked on yours, studying your reactions. You nod, testing it by rolling your hips up, and he moans, pressing deeper, you brace for pain, but there isn’t any, just a fullness, just a lot of stretching, pressure. “Mmm!”
“Are you alright my love?” He whispers, teeth clenched, and you nod, sucking in a breath as he strokes your face, shoving in so deep, you’re so wet it doesn’t hurt at all but it’s so much pressure.
“I’m so full? It’s a lot.” He pulls back a bit, sliding his fingers inside you instead of his cock, crooking them up as he’s kissing you over and over, and you’re clinging to his back, feeling the strong muscles contract. He makes you cum again, drinking your cries, then slides in, and fuck it feels so good then, you moan into his mouth.
“That’s it, you need a lot of warm up, I see.” He teases, and you giggle, breathless, as he holds one of your hands, entwining your fingers together. “Better, love?”
“Much. You can move, Sir.” You tease, then gasp as he does, as he begins, your back arching. He is stroking in and out of you, rolling his hips and bracing himself over you, lips peppering kisses everywhere he can, as your eyes roll back and your toes curl, and you feel such intense sensations. “Ken!”
“That’s it, my perfect darling. Cum on me, please, let me feel you.” He whispers, so husky, and his words along with his motions make you shatter, cumming all over him, pulsing around his cock. He pauses, sucking in a breath, head falling back. “You feel so exquisite, darling.”
“Ngh, y-you feel s’good.” You whisper back, as the gentle waves rock over you, and Nanami’s slowing his thrusts, kissing you sweetly.
“Wish I could cum inside you, so badly.” He says and you get flustered, now that you know what that means. “I won’t yet, love.”
“Yet.” You whisper back, earning his smile, and fuck Nanami’s smile is brilliant, as he makes sure you feel so good, as he’s caressing you everywhere you’re sensitive, as he gently rocks his hips, so not to hurt you, and soon he’s finding his own release, pulling out and resting his head on yours as he cums, sticky hot ribbons all over your belly button and tummy.
“Oh my god, you feel too good.” He says then, kissing you as you lean up on your elbows, and you blush furiously at the sight.
“It seems so wanton, Sir.” You say with a giggle, and he smirks.
“It is rather wanton, I’m afraid. I corrupted you.”
“Not at all. I am no angel.”
“You look an angel. Let me clean you.” He’s gently running a washcloth over your pussy, and you hiss a bit. “Too much love?”
“No, just a lot to get used to.” You smile reassuringly, running your hand up his chiseled cheekbone. “It was so much easier this time. I was afraid for nothing.”
He exhales in relief, shoulders stooping slightly. “Thank the gods, I was so worried.”
“No need to worry, indeed, I believe I quite enjoy it.” He grins now, and you both kiss over and over as the timer beeps, and he pulls you close against him, as you snuggle into his embrace.
“I want to take you out to town, not hide you.” He says huskily after you’ve dressed and turned off the oven, and you frown, feeling his need and devotion. “So beautiful they’ll question what you see in me.”
You glare then, shoving at his chest. “Excuse me! You’re so handsome, you better stop that!”
He grins now, mischievous. “How will you punish me hmm?”
“I could come up with ideas.” He laughs, the sound resonating in the room, and then he checks his bronze pocket watch.
“I eagerly look forward to them. It’s almost time to meet the lawyer, are you sure you’re ready, darling?” He asks softly, and you nod then, as a million thoughts whirl inside your mind.
A life of your own, with a man that loves you.
Baking muffins and making love, versus…
Whatever the fuck Gojo was.
“I’m ready.”
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Later that evening 
You and your puppy Satoru walk into the manor, and for the… seventh day in a row? Satoru is not with a woman. You tilt your head curiously as the puppy Satoru comes to the Duke, and he pets him with a little smile, looking exhausted. Your puppy loves him and you’re not sure why, but it seems Gojo is also a little affectionate with him now.
Satoru Gojo looks at you then, assessing your body, and his lips go in a terse line. “Have fun, Duchess?” Duke Gojo asks, his voice dark and desperate, as you clutch your stack of papers tightly to your chest.
“I did indeed. And you, Duke?” You ask nonchalantly, coming into the dining room, lit by the soft chandeliers, as Satoru pours over his ledger as he sips on whiskey. “Is that your dinner?”
He laughs bitterly. “What care you? You care nothing for me. I am surprised you’ve even spoken to me today.” He says, gripping his glass so tight his knuckles whiten, veins popping out the back of his hand. You feel guilt eating at you, but you shouldn’t.
You shouldn’t.
“You care naught for me, so what does it matter?” You say, and he gulps his drink down now, sighing, shutting his swirling, tired blue eyes.
“I’m tired of watching you come back with marks from another man. I’m so fucking tired of it.” He speaks roughly, looking at you with eyes glassy from drink, red from exhaustion. You scoff as you walk forward, so close to him, that you inhale him, and his scent.
“And you-”
“I’m with no one!” His desperation kills you, as he looks over your body with silent hunger. “Can’t say the same for you.”
“Well welcome to my first couple of weeks with you, manwhore.” He scoffs, rolling his eyes. “Maybe you should bring them around, you’re awfully sad not fucking random women.”
“Sure, that’s why I’m sad.” He stands then, pouring another drink, as you come up to him then, sucking up your stupid feelings. “What on Earth is this!?” Satoru demands, fingering the enormous stack of legal papers you hand him then, and you giggle a bit, earning his icy blue glare.
“Have you learned to read, Duke Gojo?” You tap the top of the stack, and watch his brows draw together.
“What the… bloody hell…” He’s thumbing through them now, fervently going over it, mouth open, as you cling to the little satchel with the gift and note Nanami Kento gave you at the meeting.
“Indeed, it’s all in there, I had a lawyer write it up. Witnesses of our lack of intimacy are on page twenty two.” You say with a grin, and he glares, flipping to it, mouth wide open.
“Suguru and Shoko signed it!?”
“Mmhmm, they did not mind at all confirming those details, that we have not even once shared a room, let alone a bed. Oh, by the way, I kissed Suguru.”
“You what!?” He stands then, furiously, as you giggle.
“Indeed, we would have gone much further but… alas, he’s a little loyal to you I suppose. I believe he wanted to… oh, lick under my skirts he said! Why it’s a popular thing, all you men want to. Hmm. Should have let him, huh?” You smirk as you watch Gojo lose it, as you turn and spin, as if in a dance, heading to grab a glass of wine. “Mmm, yummy.”
“You insolent fucking brat. You kissed my best friend?” You shrug, nodding a bit, as his eyes swirl with emotions, as they dilate with anger.
“As I said, I should have done more, he was such a good kisser, hmm.”
“You fucking brat.” He snatches you by your free wrist, and you suck in a breath, steeling yourself with a nasty smile. You’ve had enough of trying to break through, of caring, you’re so far gone from him, you just can’t wait to hurt him, just the tiniest bit, before you never see him again. “Better kisser than me?”
“Oh yes, so gentle, not crude and nasty and-”
“You loved my kisses.” He whispers huskily, earning your laugh.
“Sure, whatever you think. Ah, you know Duke Gojo, someone else signed, take a gander.” You sip your wine, raising a brow, as he sputters again.
“Catherine!?”
“Mmm, yes. I saw her and we had lunch, she is too good for you in my opinion, quite a gem that girl. She apologized for everything. I think we’ll be friends!” You sip more, a little dripping on your lips, you touch the tip of your tongue to your lower lip as Satoru looks at you hungrily, then back at the paper, forlorn. “Continue on now.”
“You’ll give me half the dowry, why!?”
“It’s the best option, to make sure it’s swift, what a splendid deal, a month of marriage for that much money!”
“You wish to get rid of me so badly?” He whispers, looking up through his snowy lashes, and you nod then, tensing a bit.
“I’m willing to give you seventy percent, but please allow me thirty, for any children I have. I want to make sure they have something.” Satoru grabs you by your shoulders then, glaring.
“Children?”
“Mmm, of course, Kento wants two or three. If we shall be so lucky! And if they’re girls, they’ll need a dowry from me.”
“Kento. That’s his name?” He whispers, and you nod just a bit, as his breaths grow heavy, as he blinks tears. “Children with him?”
“Indeed, it’s what I’ll want, to be a mother. I love children. You’d know that if you ever asked about me, if you ever cared.” You clear your throat, stepping back, pouring another glass. “All in all, it’s a splendid deal. I suggest you go over it with your lawyer, I am quite exhausted, I do not know how you have energy after sex.”
“After… after…” You giggle again, snatching his bottle and turning, your skirts swishing behind you. “Come back here!”
“No thanks, I’ve had enough of looking at you. Go find some whores to fuck, it’s your only hobby it seems. Tata!” You saunter up the stairs, hearing the crashing, hearing his growl, then hearing his cries, soft sobs he assumes you don’t hear, but you’re happy he’s sobbing.
Fuck Satoru Gojo.
You eagerly set the bottle of wine down on your table, locking your chamber door and sipping one more, as you open the note.
My love, I cannot get you a ring yet, but please have this, it is not much but I wanted you to wear something from me. I will count the seconds until I may gaze upon your sweet face again.
Yours,
Nanami.
You tear up then, as your heart swells for this man, this man that has become so dear, remembering his caresses this morning, remembering the pleasure you found in his arms. The second time was so much better, so good you crave him already again, aching until next time you can feel him, filling you so full.
You shake yourself out of this heated dream, shaky hands opening a little velvet pouch, revealing a little delicate gold necklace, with a tiny little gold charm, and on the back it was two letters, K.N., his initials of course. Your heart thuds as you take off the heavy diamonds and sapphires Satoru’s money had bought, putting on instead this little necklace.
Fuck it feels good to rip off Satoru, and replace it with Nanami.
You hear a knocking on your door, and you roll your eyes.
“Go the fuck away, Duke. I’m done speaking.” You finger the necklace, smiling at your reflection. Nanami’s wife one day? It seemed so far away, but now…
Now anything is possible.
“Please, let me in. Please can we talk?” He is pleading, and you hear it, how desperate he is, and fuck if you were stupid you would let him, but you must become stronger. You can never, ever trust this man.
“No.” You hope your voice sounds more firm than you feel.
“Please, can I just… explain myself!? Please! I have not done anything since that day, could you just… fucking talk to me?” He’s slamming a hand on the door, resting his head, and you want so badly to let him in, fuck. You cannot fall for this.
You take a breath. “No thanks. Don’t care to hear. Good night Duke.” You hear his footsteps fade away, and you take several breaths, tilting your head as you see the small glimmer of hope. “Mrs. Nanami, hmm… I quite like that sound.” You whisper to yourself, picturing it.
A beautiful bride, a handsome husband, happiness, there would be no Nanami Kento fingering a maid in the gardens, there would be no Nanami Kento smacking you and downing you on your wedding night, and you sobbing on the cold marble floor of your room, alone.
No, he would adore you.
You hear Satoru slamming his own door to his bedchamber, you hear things flinging against the wooden walls, tentatively walking to where your walls connect, placing your forehead on it. You hear him then, cursing, and it breaks you when you hear pieces and words, wishing your stupid heart did not feel bad, wishing you were not so caring, so kind.
“Worthless… why can’t I… why did I… she’s not her… she’s in love… I can’t do this… fucking hell…” It’s a long time before he settles, and you choke on your own quiet sobs, wishing this stupid man could have not caused this. Somewhere deep in this evil manwhore is a tortured fucking soul, one you recognize, because you are also one, just wrapped in a pretty bow.
You find yourself sobbing right with him, wishing more than anything there was not this foolish barrier of his own making, that Satoru Gojo did not push everything away, and suffers alone. But you also suffer right along with him, struggling to swipe your tears away and laying in your bed, curled into a little ball, as you wonder at what a different life would be.
One where he just had tried.
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That night you feel his presence again, feel Gojo’s long fingers caressing your cheek as you sleep, and for once you don’t pretend, you grab his wrist, opening your eyes and blinking in the dark. He gasps, tensing as he’s hovered over you, with his face too perfect to exist, so beautiful it makes you ache, makes you wish his soul was half that pretty.
But his soul was cold, dark, he was cold, dark, an icy pond that you’d be tempted to skate on, only to fall through the cracks, and lose your breath. And you feel his breath, blowing back your baby hairs on your forehead gently, as his blue eyes glitter even in the dark, the moonlight casting shadows on the sharp planes of his face.
“Why do you come here at night?” You ask finally, and he gulps, unmoving, lips parted but saying nothing. You scoff. “Of course, when will you answer anything.”
“I come here because you look like an angel in your sleep.” He says hoarsely, and you suck in a breath at that, as you hear his vulnerability, his thumb stroking the apple of your cheek. “I can forget how much I have hurt you, you look peaceful, I can… pretend.”
“I…” You don’t know how to answer, letting go of his wrist then, leaning up and clearing your throat. “I do not understand you.”
“I do not understand myself.” He says, sitting on your bed at the edge, but far too close, you can feel the heat of his body as you study him, his dark circles so prominent on his pale skin.
“Are you not sleeping well?” You ask then, sitting up and scooching back, feeling your cool silk pillows over your thin night shift. He laughs without humor.
“No, I’m not sleeping at all.” Satoru rakes a hand through his snow white hair, messier than it usually is. He has stubble you’ve never seen as well, his cheeks just a little hollowed.
“Maybe you miss your whores?” You ask, raising a brow, and he snorts, rolling his pretty blue eyes.
“Indeed, you seem to be the one fucking now, I have no time. I have too much to try to fix.”
“Ah, your father’s mess?”
“You know?”
“Just a bit. Seems he tripled the taxes in the villages.” Satoru nods, then looks at you carefully. “What is it?”
“A proposition.”
Your turn to snort. “What sort of proposition?”
“Not sex, do not worry. You have enough sex I’m sure, with your… Kento is his name, hmm?” You absentmindedly touch that necklace, and Satoru’s eyes dart to it curiously. “Do you like it, sex?”
You laugh at that, shaking your head and leaning up. “We are speaking of sex with each other?”
“Why not, we’re not together, we never will be. Perhaps we could at least not hate each other at the end of this?” You blink a bit in shock, leaning back.
“You will always hate me.” You whisper, the words like vitriol in your throat, and Satoru sighs, looking away, rubbing the back of his neck, his lips open and close, then repeating the action, making your mind run, what exactly was he thinking, and why were you still intrigued.
“I am trying not to hate you.” His words are soft, and just confusing. “I've been trying to avoid having another woman while we’re still together here, since that night, I know it was hurtful to you…”
You glare as you remember it, his nasty words, his slaps… his kiss, fuck you wish you remembered th… “The night you fucked the ‘entire brothel’ you mean?”
“Two women.”
“Oh, only two!”
He glares. “Insolent brat. Will you let me finish?”
You sigh. “Fine then.
“I  was hurt that you seem to not want me, not one bit, do you? You wanted another man.” He bites out the words carefully, as you hear that hurt in his voice, the voice that had been so tortured.
You glare. “And you want other women.”
“I should have understood what you did, I pushed you there.” His voice breaks, vulnerable, as his fists clench and unclench. “I thought I could fix everything in one goddamn day, but you were already gone.”
“I was never here, really, you never let me be.” You’re struggling to keep in your emotions in the quiet night, but Gojo has tears trailing down his face, as he leans close, and you stop him. “Do not kiss me.”
“I was not going to. Just…” He brushes your hair back, touching your cheek gently, and you shiver, at how that touch alone ruins you, as he runs a thumb along your lower lip, eyes staring so intensely you feel them like a touch. “Of course anyone would want you, I was the one who denied you your marital rights. Of course you want an annulment. Who would want to be with me?”
You frown then, as his long white lashes lower. “All I know is your cruelty, Duke Gojo. I know nothing but that you did not want me.”
“But it was all a lie. All of it. I… it matters naught, I imagine this… Kento makes you happy, pleased?” You nod, and he fingers the little charm, flipping it over and then looking back at you. “Does he cum in you?”
“What!?” You smack his hand, glaring. “Do you cum in your mistresses?”
“Fuck no. I don’t want brats.” You sigh, rolling your eyes.
“That is about what I expected. Even when you marry a woman you love, and not me?” You ask, and he shakes his head.
“I will not have children, it’s best this way. I would not be a good father.” Your heart breaks then, for this cruel man, for this messy, fucked up Duke who you should not even speak to.
“Why do you think that?” You ask then, softly, and he smirks just a bit, brushing his fingers along your collarbone, goosebumps raising up, your nipples taut in the sheer gown, apparent more and more with your quick breaths. He notices, clearly, licking a full lower lip, as you tense, but he does not do more, his jaw locks.
“I am afraid I’d be like my father. I look just like him. They say I even act like him, and maybe I do.” You wonder then, what his father has done, but you should not care, it’s no excuse for him, none.
Why do you care?
“I will never talk to my child as my mother does.” You say softly, and he smiles a bit, dropping his hand, now resting on your thigh over a soft blanket.
“I know you would not.”
“Thus, we do not become our parents, but it’s ultimately up to you if you want children, it does not have anything to do with me. Well, it won’t soon.”
He blinks through more emotion, and fuck you just want to hug him, hold him, and how can you want this, how can you!? What is this lingering feeling squeezing your heart like a vise, ruining your goddamn soul? Why can you feel the very breath being sucked out of your lungs as you study this cold, broken, beautiful man.
“You are too kind, you know. Even when you’re nasty and use your tongue to whip those cruel comments, you’re still kind.” You bite your lower lip, brows drawing together as he studies you. “I suppose I have no right to ask about sex, I just would not like a child, especially another man.”
“He does not cum in me.” You say then, flushed, as you watch his fists clench on your blankets. “He cums on me.”
“On you? Ah.” He clears his throat, as you have the most awkward conversation you can imagine, talking to your husband about your lover. “And you cum?”
You’re blushing furiously, brushing your hair back, as you feel heat rising between your thighs. “Yes, I do.”
“During sex?”
“Yes.”
“Well at least you’re getting fucked properly.” You giggle then, at the ridiculous nature of this, and he looks at you with narrowed eyes.
“What do you care if I am? It would still be me getting fucked.”
“And how much do you cum?”
You roll your eyes. “During sex? Once or twice. The first time… it hurt a bit. Now it’s much more pleasurable.”
“Once or twice.” He smirks then, eyes drifting down your body slowly, and you clear your throat, blush back in full force as he assesses you. “That’s good for foreplay, but I try to have my women cumming until they can’t function.”
You gulp, throat dry now, fiddling with the bow on your bodice. “Kento is a caring, gentle lover to me. He cares about my pleasure.”
“Yes, well.” He leans forward, until your noses almost touch, and you inhale Satoru’s sweet scent, feel his cool breath on your overheated lips. “You’ll not find out, but I am not gentle, I fuck and I fuck hard. I’d fuck the shit out of you, beat that pretty pussy up till it’s a puffy mess, have your knees so weak you collapse.”
You say nothing, your heart pounding in your chest, as vivid images fill your addled brain, and all you can whisper is - “Ah.”
He chuckles just a bit, running his fingers up and down your cheek again. “Want to know why I really haven’t fucked anyone since the night you told me?”
“Why?” You whisper, eyes darting to his lips, struggling to keep your composure, where is your composure?
“Because I can’t cum, they can’t get me off, not when it’s you in my head, even knowing you’re fucking him, I’d choose you over anyone. And I hate it.” He speaks through gritted teeth, pulling your hair gently then, and you can’t stop the pathetic whine, and oh he notices.
“Why can’t you cum? You could before?”
“I haven’t been able to finish since you dripped down my mouth.”
“You could lick someone else?”
“I have.” You hate the lurch in your stomach. “It’s not special anymore, I suppose, thought I’d try it out. But it did nothing for me. Suppose the brothel workers enjoyed.”
“You are skilled.” He smirks again and you glare. “Somewhat.”
“Somewhat indeed. But no, Princess, I wouldn’t take it easy, especially now that you’re not a virgin, I’d have your legs in the air, fucking you so deep I bruise your insides, so deep I’m everywhere.” He says softly, as if he’s saying something sweet and not lewd, not ridiculous. You shiver as you feel that ache for him, the one that never goes away, the one you despise.
“I did not see you go so rough with your mistresses.” You say, and he grins fully now, with his sharp teeth.
“I said with you. I’d take out my anger on that perfect, tight little cunt, I’d fucking ruin you for him, until you’re crying pretty tears, covered in my cum, covered in bite marks, ass bruised from my smacks.” You have no clue what he means, but you’re fucking wet, hot and sticky, and his eyes lower as if the mother fucker could tell. “You’ll not have to find out, no worries.”
“Indeed.” Your voice breaks, and you clear your throat. “I very much enjoy my lover, I will not stop seeing him.”
“Here’s the proposition. You will stop fucking him just until we’re not together, and I also will see no women.”
“What, I do not believe you!”
“You have my word.”
“Why do I care!?”
“Because, I will give you the full dowry back, and agree to the annulment.” You gasp at that, looking at him wide eyed. “I never wanted it. Give it to your children you have with your baker.”
“I… that’s so generous?” You whisper, and Satoru shrugs.
“I’m rich enough. I’ll agree to it in a month’s time, but I need you to make appearances at the villages with me, help me make it right. You’re a lot kinder, and so loved by people, they will listen to you. If you can… pretend as we have been, a little longer, I will sign it with no issues, and even tell our families it’s our decision.”
“You only want me to help you?”
“Yes, I cannot do it alone, and… even if you’ll be gone soon, it would help me tremendously. Also, if I can make some amends to the horrible man I’ve been, and perhaps help you get rid of me, let you be happy…” He touches that gold necklace, and your heart is racing so hard you think it will just jump out. “Let you have children, have a smile on your face.”
“Why!? Why couldn’t you have been this way before!” You say then, so goddamn frustrated, and he frowns, looking away, locking up. Of course he is. “Why could you have not tried! Was I so terrible at first?”
“You were nothing but perfect. It’s all on me.” He clears his throat, leaning close, as you lean back, and he smiles sadly.
“So why no Nanami?”
“Just… please, give me that one thing. And you’ll be free soon to be with him as much as you want.” He says then, and you sigh, thinking of how you will explain this to Nanami, who was already so… possessive. What would this do to him?
But this was a good idea, and you could be free to marry him, to move on, and have enough money to take care of any children. And Satoru helping you with both of your parents was invaluable. All to just pretend for a bit, and you do not mind helping the village or it’s inhabitants.
“I’ll do it.” You say then, holding your hand out for a shake, and he takes it, smiling a bit, the corner of his lips quirking, as he brings it to his lips, shocking you, Satoru was no gentleman.
“I do not deserve your kindness, but it’s appreciated. I should… leave you to your sleep.” You want to pull him to you, you want to kiss his pretty lips, as you sit there, eyes wide as you look at him, as he stands, and your hand still grip his. “What, you want a demonstration of how I’d ruin you for anyone?”
“No, you dick!” You scowl, smacking him then, and he’s chuckling, that devious grin far too attractive.
“Your nipples lie every time.”
“I’m cold, being around such a cold man.” You say, crossing your arms over your breasts, only for him to lean down, pressing his full lips to your cheek, then your jaw, then your ear. You hate how your head falls back, how your cunt throbs from just that around nothing, how you bite your lip so hard.
“Oh Princess, I am actually… burning hot. Burning for you.” You cry out, shaking your head, and he sighs, hand cupping your face, tilting your chin up to stare at him in the night. “I do burn for you, but you don’t want me, and I don’t blame you. I will let you be, once I get some progress done. I can keep to myself.”
“I… oh. Um. All right.” You say then, raising your brows as he pecks a sweet kiss on you temple. “How can I trust you’re not lying?”
“You cannot take my word I am sure, but I will honor the deal. In a month’s time you can be free of me.” The pain in his voice almost breaks you, but you nod, trying to suck up your emotions. “We have an accord, Princess?”
“We have an accord, Duke.”
“Seal it with a kiss?”
“No!” He’s chuckling, ruffling your hair as he stands then, heading toward the door, and every part of your stupid body is begging him to come back, so you shove it down hard. But… “Duke Gojo?”
He turns at the door, eyes dark from the shadows, but you feel it, his desire mirroring yours, but it’s stupid, and foolish, and what’s it matter!? So what if he’s not a whore for a moment, he would soon not be yours, and you not his, and you both could live your lives.
It was ideal.
“Um, good night.” You mumble, unsure why you stopped him in the first place, and you watch his face soften, before hardening a bit, lips in a firm line.
“Good night, Princess.” It sounds too good coming from Satoru Gojo’s lips, and you wish you could not enjoy them so much, could ignore everything this man does to you. Are you stupid to believe him? “I swear, I will keep my word.” He cuts off your thoughts, as if he read them yourself, and you give him a little nod, pulling your comforter over yourself, shivering in the chill of the room.
“I will believe you and keep our agreement.” You say softly, and he nods a bit, eyes lingering, then he leaves, shutting your door with a quiet click.
What was that?
What were you thinking?
But somehow, you feel he was being sincere, for once, and you want to trust him, that he was sincere, that somewhere in there was a decent human being. He wanted to help others, and perhaps you could leave this with less hatred and pain in your heart, but there is one looming thought beating you senseless, ruining your mind, your heart, your soul.
That if you spend time with Satoru, your feelings will develop beyond whatever insane passion you feel, and you cannot open up to him, you must comparmentalize it, see it as a partnership, so you can both be free. It’s what he wanted, right, to not be with you?
She’s not her.
I’m trying not to hate you.
I should hate you.
You’re just like-
Who was she? It’s a thought that keeps you up for some time, until you finally fade into a restless sleep, one where you dream of Nanami, and his heart broken over you, because you’ve hurt him again. And you’re left alone, on the side of the cobblestone streets, having destroyed everything.
You wake up in a cold sweat, walking over to your little pedestal sink, rinsing your face carefully, looking in the mirror, and you start to wonder, who are you? You’re not that girl you were when you got here, and you can barely remember who she was anymore, so consumed by Satoru Gojo and now Nanami Kento.
You lean over the sink, feeling sick, as your hands touch the mirror of your looking glass, and your head rests upon it. You picture Satoru’s arms around you, picture him fucking you like he said, rough and brutal, perhaps choking you, smacking you, until you can’t walk.
You see it, you feel it, brutal grip and his huge cock, as he’s got those long fingers wrapped around your throat, only to punch the mirror angrily, only serving to hurt your own fist. You shake it, cursing yourself as you hold your hand to you, as you feel the anguish take you over.
Who are you?
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Until the next, dear masochistic readers <3
Part Nine
315 notes · View notes
heegyukeluv · 3 months ago
Text
love-battery (lhs) - req
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pairing: heeseung x afab!reader
synopsis: Heeseung always would make you feel recharged just by being around. And you did the same to him.
my's note: hi hello here's a very fluff cute little thing! it's a request (thank you for requesting <3), so i hope you like it!!!! (have to say that when i chose the name of this fic, the jinyoung's song with similar name started to play on my head non-stop help)
warnings: skinship, established relationship, fluff, pet names, explicit language (i can't help myself. i'll always use at least one 'fuck' lol).
request: clingy gf with heeseung and it’s super cute and they’re in love, she really just misses him (here!)
wc: 3k
NOT PROOFREAD.
Even with your boyfriend’s tight schedule and the fact you both lived quite far from each other, you and Heeseung always managed ways to meet up and hang out for at least an hour or so – enough to work as a full recharge for Heeseung.
However, for the last whole month you only saw Heeseung three times. You were used to seeing him almost every day, either by going to his and staying for a bit or he coming to yours for the same reason, and it was pissing you off how annoying adult life was being so far, unabling you to do your daily basis chores, let alone drive to Heeseung’s studio to be with him.
Heeseung normally had a tough routine as a producer by spending long hours in his studio, staying up all night working on his music and constantly dealing with tight deadlines. Your favorite hobby was to grab a coffee and some snacks to surprise him by showing up unexpectedly; and of course, to sit on his lap while he kept doing his things. 
But now you were the one fighting against time, as you had to deal with your last year in college, struggling with your final project and with your respective project partners – who would have thought that working with people would lead you to be that stressed, huh?
Your life was a total mess at this point, your sleep schedule chaotic, your body aching, begging for a pause to get some proper rest, but you really couldn’t give yourself that luxury; all the submission dates getting closer and closer making you go crazy in desperation.
And on top of that, you haven’t seen your boyfriend, the main source of your happiness, in almost two weeks.
“This is so frustrating, Hee,” you said with a realistic sad tone, when you decided to ignore the blank page on your laptop waiting for a new plot to pop up in your mind, and give your love life a little more attention, calling Heeseung. “It’s almost like the world doesn't want us to be together.”
“Don’t say such things, my love. Not even as kidding,” he interrupted you to say with a gentle voice. “We’re going to figure out something, yeah?”
“I’m sorry, Hee. But– I’m dealing with a bunch of stupid assignments with stupid deadlines in this stupid degree I chose, and you’ve told me early this week that you were pretty chill with your work. But I didn’t even have time to invite you over the days you said you’re free! Not to mention that if you were here I’d be paying more attention to you and getting fucked with my project.”
“Y/N–”
“And when I’m free you’re the one swamped with work! And, please, I’m not blaming you, babe, please don’t take it the wrong way. I love you and I love that you can work with the thing you’re passionate about. I’m just… Frustrated,” you unloaded with a long sigh, voice trembling a bit since your feelings were, also, a mess and your heart aching. “And I miss you so much. I wish we lived a bit closer, so we could meet more often in moments like this.”
You heard Heeseung soft breathing through the phone. He decided to let you vent instead of cutting you off, because he, more than anyone, knew how overwhelmed you felt whenever you had to deal with submission dates and projects. It was your third project in your whole degree, this one being the most important one, and Heeseung saw you in shambles during your working time in the smaller ones, fully understanding how hard it has been with this final one.
“I’m sorry you’re having to go through all of this, pretty girl,” you could feel the comfort in his tender, sweet tone. You wiped out a single tear that tried to escape your eyes, curving yourself into a little ball on your couch. “But you don’t have to do this alone, my love,” you heard a weird noise through his phone, very similar to a door unlocking. Your door unlocking. You frowned. “Don’t freak out, bae. I’m entering your apartment right now.”
Your heart dropped in your chest. “What?” You whispered in disbelief, your phone falling off from your hand, your eyes widening as you watched your boyfriend walk through the front door, smiling big and bright at you.
His dark red hair was attractively messy because of the motorcycle helmet. He also carried a big backpack on his back and a plastic bag with the logo of your favorite food place.
“You’re kidding me,” your voice was barely a whisper at this point, your lips curving into a smile that grew bigger and bigger, still finding it hard to believe that the man talking to you on your phone was now in front of you. Your beloved boyfriend was now in front of you. “Lee fucking Heeseung!” You almost squealed, walking in his direction right after he put his helmet and his backpack on the ground, to jump on his open arms which were waiting to embrace you in a tight hug.
Your legs instantly wrapped around his waist and your arms on his shoulders, his firm hands gripping on your thighs to hold you close and steady as you buried your face on his neck, inhaling his scent as if it was your favorite drug. You heard Heeseung chuckling at your reaction and you finally noticed how fast your heart was beating, everything feeling unreal. All the frustration you felt waving off your body quickly.
“Hi, baby,” Heeseung said in an affectionate way, with you still hidden on the curve of his neck, making him let out a small laugh at your adorableness. He missed you so much.
Your fingers tangled in his soft hair, pulling him into yourself as if you could become one before you started to kiss every piece of his exposed skin, from his jawline to close to his ear, to his cheek, the tip of his nose and finally his glistening, dreamy lips.
Heeseung let out a contented sigh when he felt your sweet taste, walking carefully through the living room so he could sit on the couch with you on his lap, the contact never breaking. He deepened the kiss by slightly brushing his tongue on your bottom lip, electricity running all over his body once you let him in to feel him closer, so intimately; his hands sneaked into your shirt, caressing the bare skin of your waist just because he needed to touch, to feel you more.
“I missed you so much, my love,” you whispered when you parted away to catch your breath, pecking his lip countless times as you said “Missed. You. So. Much. Oh. My. God,” and the last one lasted a bit longer, making Heeseung giggle and kiss you properly one more time. 
“I missed you too, pretty.”
Heeseung was looking at you with so much love, his eyes sparkling in joy for finally having you that close, touching, kissing you. He caressed your cheek while his gaze wandered all your face features, as if he was trying to memorize every one of them, completely endeared by your beauty.
Heeseung looked at you as if he just discovered what love is. 
You weren’t different, though. Your soft touch on his strands of hair, scratching slightly as your contemplated every piece of your very good-looking boyfriend, not holding yourself when your fingers started gently to trace his face; his big deer eyes now turned into little crescents, his pretty nose that you loved to kiss, the little charming mole on his forehead, and his so, so attractive lips adorning the most beautiful smile you ever had the chance to see. You were so in love.
Heeseung felt like he could stare at you all day and he would never feel tired, actually to have you close always worked as a battery recharge. And for you, Heeseung did the same, making all your bad feelings wash away easily because you had him, and you knew you could rely on him.
Ironically, the sound of your laptop on the coffee table indicating that its battery was running out, pulled you both out of your little love bubble, startling you slightly. The reality check hit you with full force, and the bottom of your stomach sank immediately.
You gulped, looking at Heeseung with a hint of sadness before you sighed and said, “Don’t get me wrong, I’m super happy you’re here, but I–”
“You have things to do, I know,” Heeseung cut you off mid-sentence. His kind voice, the small peck on your cheek, and his cute smile making you shiver and melt. “But don’t worry about me, okay? You do your things, I’ll be around for whenever you finish, and then we can cuddle,” he said simply, tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear.
“You’re staying?” You questioned with eyes sparkling in confusion. “I don’t want you to mess up your sche–”
Heeseung now stopped your talking with a sweet kiss, and then another, and another, and one more just in case. “I’m staying, baby,” he chuckled at your tilted head, expressing that you were very much confused. “As I said before, I’m pretty chill this week,” he explained with a warm smile, mirroring yours. “Anything I have to do, I can do from my computer or phone, so I’m all yours this weekend, my love.”
Heeseung fell even deeply for you when he saw your eyes shining like you received the best news of your life. And for you, you actually did. To have your boyfriend for a whole weekend after days without being able to see each other, you truly thought you were dreaming. 
So to have Heeseung feeding you while your hands worked on your writing was definitely something that you hadn’t planned for your friday. He was openly giving his opinion as well after you cutely asked him to, paying attention to every detail you shared with him about the plot you were working on. 
“So your idea is that after he leaves the house, you give an extra zoom on the door knob because someone is going to open, even though the house is supposed to be empty?”
“Yes! And then it’s revealed to be actually his ‘dead’ twin!” You explained excitedly, noticing Heeseung gazing very passionately at you. You blushed, feeling suddenly too aware, because your story now has been read by someone other than you. “I– I know it’s kinda simple and boring, but I mean– I got the approval to keep working on it, so…” You shrugged, trying to act cool, but your pout was showing how insecure you actually felt.
“It’s not simple or anything bad, my love,” Heeseung couldn’t resist the urge of kissing your small pout as he reassured you. “It’s impressive how your creative mind works, I’m really proud,” he said with his voice filled with sincerity.
You gave him a shy smile before going back to writing, heart beating fast with his genuine words.
Heeseung never left your side. You needed him around you every single second, not only to compensate for the days you were apart, but because Heeseung was really your source of energy. So to write on your computer while having his fingers intertwined with yours became a natural activity during the moments you were working on your project. You could feel Heeseung’s love stare at your face during those moments, completely in love by your focused expression. 
Sometimes he would leave your touch to reply to some of his co-workers on his phone, giving them the attention they needed, but in the meantime his head would be resting on your shoulder, completely addicted to your touch and to having you close – his hair tickling your neck making you lose focus for a few minutes.  
You both wanted and needed each other with the same intensity. Heeseung always loved your clinginess, emphasizing how lovable you looked with your pouty face whenever he had to leave the bed to go to the bathroom or grab some food in the kitchen and “leave you to die alone”, like you normally would say in a very dramatic way. Especially because he himself was pretty clingy too, holding you in a tight back hug whenever you had to go back home after visiting him at his studio, refusing to let you leave his side.
To move in together was a big dream. However Heeseung always talked with you about finishing your studies first before committing your relationship on that instance, so you could have your freedom without him disrupting your focus; he also knew that he wasn’t ready to have you so close for that long, afraid of scaring you off by how much he would be around you, maybe losing his own concentration on his work. 
And this behavior was being shown at that moment, by you doing the lunch and him hugging you from behind.
“I have to be honest, I don’t really see this as ‘helping’, Hee,” you said with a playful chuckle, not really bothered by his big hands resting on your hips as well as his chin on your shoulder while you did all the work. He was clinging like a koala, making it challenging to move around the kitchen.
“What do you mean? I’m clearly helping you,” he said with a babyish voice, making you giggle. You could tell he was pouting too. “What if you get hurt? I have to be close, y’know? To save you from danger.”
You laughed hard, throwing your head behind and profusely resting it on his chest. “The danger?”
“Yeah, the knife and fire and stuff…” He explained like it was obvious.
You turned down the heat on the stove, moving away from it so you could face your boyfriend, just to meet his big, adorable eyes looking at you with a dramatically pleading expression. “You’re right,” you said softly, cupping his cheeks and planting a kiss on his lips. “Thank you for protecting me from the dangers of my kitchen,” you added a hint of sarcasm to your very affectionate tone, without holding your smile when he nodded proudly, before pulling you closer to kiss you properly as now your self-proclaimed hero. 
After you finished cooking – with Heeseung’s help, of course –, you both shared the meal, doing constant “love shots” but with your food, just so you could feel each other’s touch.
Heeseung didn’t let you go back to work on your project when you finished eating, saying you needed a bit of resting time with him. And how could you oppose such truthful words? 
So you spend quite a long time of your Saturday afternoon embraced in Heeseung’s arms and scent all over you, making it difficult to choose anything different from being on the bed cuddling him. 
After changing positions many times, you now were on top of Heeseung, face buried on his neck while he hummed some random song, hands gently caressing your back and scalp, making you wonder if taking a quick nap at that moment would mess up too much with your project work.
As if a sense of responsibility hit you, remembering all your deadlines and especially that you had to finish at least the plot writing by Monday – in two days –, you forced yourself to try to move away. Your body refused, though.
“I should go,” you said, muffed into his skin.
“Yeah, you should…” Heeseung added, not moving an inch to help you with that. In fact, he held you closer. Your warm body against his own helping him to relax. 
“Like, reeeally gotta go…” You didn’t move as well, trailing kisses all over his neck as you refused to get up.
“Definitely you do…” His voice was a bit raspy in a sweet, tender way that made it even harder for you to leave. He was about to fall asleep.
You sighed, “I missed being like this with you.” You lifted your head just enough to see his serene expression; eyes closed, lips slightly parted and a calm breathing. You almost cried with the fact that you truly needed to go back to your life instead of staying there with Heeseung. 
Your hands caressed his face with all the care in the world, making him open his eyes, “I missed it too, pretty. I miss you every moment I’m without you, actually.”
You noticed a soft flush  on Heeseung cheeks and giggled at the sight of your ‘so cool’ boyfriend blushing in front of you. 
You always appreciated how Heeseung was not only a good listener to your worries and maybe overwhelming thoughts, but also unafraid to show you his most sensitive and vulnerable side in order to make you comfortable on doing the same. You cherished his presence in your life with all you had, not being scared of loving him so openly, because he did the same for you. 
“I love you,” you whispered, leaning in to tease a kiss. He smiled against your lips, closing his eyes again.
“I love you too, my love,” he murmured, mirroring your tone and capturing your bottom lip with his own, to pull you near and finally kiss you. 
You decided to stay for a bit longer, because Heeseung’s hands roaming your body with such care and tenderness, his sweet mouth working on yours, and his loving whispers against your skin were too irresistible.
The best excuse you found for yourself was that you were revitalizing so you could work better, your creativity would flow easily and you would finish it in no time.
And, well, he would be around you anyway, because he just couldn’t never get enough of your pretty face, or your joyful presence, or your addicting warm touches.
After all, Heeseung always worked as a recharger to your love battery, and for him, you were no different.
285 notes · View notes
muzansfangs · 2 months ago
Note
hello, may I request bleach male characters reaction to F! reader breaking up with them in a modern au?
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You break up with them.
Starring: Kyoraku Shunsui x f!reader; Jugram Haschwalth x f!reader; Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez x f!reader; Urahara Kisuke x f!reader; mention to Jushiro Ukitake, Ulquiorra Cifer, Yoruichi Shihoin and Sosuke Aizen;
Format: short-imagines;
Warnings: sfw, angst, modern au, breaking-up, alcohol consumption, toxic relationship, self-deprecating behavior, mental struggle, anxiety, psychological abuse, inferiority complex, suggestive themes, mutual pining, power imbalance, family problems, trust issues, infedelity, violence, gore;
Plot: Once upon a time, you were happy by their side. Things changed, though. Their flaws, their behaviors hurt you to the point of no return. You left them, they are now coping with the absence of the only woman they had ever claimed to love, whilst you try to build yourself up again.
﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏
Kyoraku Shunsui.
Lumpish, unsteady steps approched your bedroom. He probably figured you were already asleep. After all, it was three in the morning. However, you were wide-awake, sitting on the edge of the bed, a luggage at your feet and a livid expression plastered over your face. You had spared him the fatigue of moving cautiously in the room not to startle you. The last act of magnanimity you had ultimately decided to grant him.
“What are you doing awake, sweetheart?” Shunsui slurred, a frown on his face, droopy eyes boring into yours as he sauntered towards you confidently.
You scoffed, even jumping on your feet to catch him in your arms, when he tripped over the carpet. He was blind drunk, the stench of saké wafting over your face making your skin crawl and your heart shatter in your chest. It was already broken, for what could matter, hence your decision to leave. On the other hand, you cared way too much about him.
Shunsui sighed, slumping down onto the bed, weary from the lack of sleep and hours spent chugging down enough alcohol to slip you, or anyone else, into an ethylic coma. Dark circles under his eyes, disheveled hair and a feminine perfume that was not yours had given him away that night, like the privious ones. This relationship was toxic and you were not going to spend the best years of your youth attempting to save the life of a lothario who had a tendency of loving self-destructive activities.
“I’m leaving, Shunsui. We’re done. I can’t do this anymore” you simply explained, watching him sulk, obviously expecting you to give up on him, sooner or later.
“Is there anything I can do to make you stay?”.
You felt tears prickle at your eyes, jaw clenching as you shook your head and picked up your trolley. You were devastated.
“Don’t make it harder than it already is. — you admonished him, swallowing the lump in your throat as he stood up and tried to reach for your hand, but you stepped away — No, Shunsui. I tried really hard to show you how much I cared about you, about us. All you did was choosing bottles of liquors over me”.
“Honey, wait, I care about you, let’s go to sleep. We can talk about it tomorrow—” he rambled, his grey eyes shimmering in the dimly illuminated bedroom. They always seemed sincere, even his tone was softer and somehow more serious than it usually was. Yet, you knew better than falling for his sugarcoated promises to work on himself.
“There’s no tomorrow for us. We’ve been there before, Shunsui. I’m tired of being the only one invested into this relationship! It’s one-sided and, frankly, I don’t deserve it” you declared, watching him slick back one of his unruly cowlick constantly tickling his nose. You were going to miss him, of course you were.
No one fell out of love in one single night. Naturally, you were not an exception. You could not stop the tears rolling down your cheeks, not even a sob escaping your quivering lips, but you could run away to save your heart from being buried underneath a pile of ashes and dust, shambles of the wildfire consuming what remained of your love. Shunsui knew he had lost you. He fell onto his knees the moment you turned your back at him and walked out the room. He was in no condition to chase after you, not right now. He cussed and fell onto his knees, hands planted onto the carpet, fisting the fabric in his huge hands out of frustration and despair. It was all his fault and he knew you were right.
The sound of the front door slamming close made his heart sink into his chest as he punched the floor in anger. He was worried sick about you. Disappearing from his life in the dead of the night, alone, in a city as big as that. He felt miserable. He wanted you back. He wanted you safe in his arms, not alone at the bus station looking for a place to spend the night at.
You were right to leave him. He had no right to stop you. Shunsui knew he did not deserve you. But he could try to change and, hopefully, win you back. The last thing he did before laying down onto the floor was sending a message to you.
“Please, send me a text, when you’re somewhere safe”.
Obviously, you did not text him back, but your mutual friend Jushiro did. At least, Shunsui thought, you were in good hands. Better than his ones, undoubtedly.
Haschwalth Jugram.
It happened after the umpteenth dinner at the Royal Palace. Your relationship with him was balanced. He treated you with so much care, stared at you from across the rooms in adoration and reverence, gave you more than you could have ever asked for. The real problem was who he was: a Prince, the scion of a Royal family that had never truly accepted you and the class you came from.
His father’s glacial stare spoke volumes, it made you feel so out of place you often ended up having panic attacks during balls and dinners. The spotlight was perpetually on you. Snippy remarks from his mother and the uptight members of the upper class hanging around the royal family poisoned you to no end. Restless nights and a sudden incapacity to concentrate on easy tasks, such as walking down aisles alone, or dancing with your beloved boyfriend under their attentive eyes, were the results of their ferocious tongues.
The worst part of it was that you had no one to talk to about the stressful situation you were experiencing. You had been forced to move to the castle with your boyfriend, determining your connections outside to keep their distance from you. Your old flat had been abandoned along with your ordinary life. Nights out in a pub with your friends had become a taboo and even the necessary visits to your parents had been drastically reduced to mere lunches with bodyguards roaming through their house.
Talking to Haschwalth about your uneasiness and discomfort had led to arguments between the two of you and you had not failed to notice how his mother seemed uncharacteristically gregarious the day after your altercations with her son. Maids talked a lot, unfortunately. However, you were not going to tolerate this situation any longer. Collecting your clothes and belongings into a bag, you had asked Haschwalth to meet you at the train station, after escaping the bodyguards’ watch, while shopping at the mall.
When he found you, alone, piercing blue eyes pinning you on the spot, he realized it was the end of the road for you two. You were distraught, hands wiping away the tears from your face, whilst you attempted to talk.
“I love you. I really do. But that’s not the life I expected to live with you. It’s never the two of us. They hate me, Haschwalth” you started, your boyfriend’s jaw clenching.
“I am expected to become the King of this Country. If you wish for me to turn my back at my family, you are clearly mistaken” he replied lowly, twisting the blade in your heart already making you bleed out before his magnificent eyes.
You shook your head “That’s why I have to leave, Haschwalth. I don’t want you to give up on the throne, or go against your family. I just… I needed you to stand by my side, when they denigrated me publicly” you punctuated, but even this was not enough to make him flinch.
They had taught him how to suppress his emotions well. Stolid, impassive, detached from sentimental matters. Maybe way too much for him to build a strong, intimate connection in a healthy relationship.
He did not look away, instead he took a single step closer to you “You do understand that’s not affordable for the future heir of the throne? It’s something beyond my willpower. — he replied, voice firm and devoid of any affection he had usually opted for in your regards — I would never ask you to disrepect your parents, if their antics offended me. Insofar as possible, I’ll make sure you can rely on me. Don’t make a scene”.
“No, Haschwalth. I refuse to be mistreated by the band of lackeys your mother surrounds herself with and pretend everything’s fine! — you blurted out, drawing the attention of some people waiting for their train on the platform — I should have known I meant less than a noble title” you choked out, right before turning around and heading straight to the coach assigned to you.
His eyes followed you, a turmoil of contrasting feelings making their way in his mind. This was far from the life he wanted to share with you. Only when he saw the train departing, he realized he had lost you forever and how severe the emotional damage his parents had inflicted to him really was. He felt kind of dehumanized, an empty shell even in private matters.
Your absence affected him more than you could have ever imagined. He watched you from afar for months, making sure you were fine without him. And you were. It hurt him immensely and, even though he wanted to contact you, he did not. You needed space and time and it was probably for the better. He had watched your lovable smile fade from your face through the time you had spent at the Royal Palace. Now, watching you eat a pizza with your friends, he witnessed to you blossoming again into the radiant girl he had met a long time ago.
Maybe, one day, if you still wanted him, he would have come knocking at your door again, offering his heart to you on a silver tray.
Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez.
From the moment you had seen him getting off of his motorbike outside a bar, black leather jacket and cheeky grin modeling the wondrous eyes of the girls sipping on their drinks into glossy hearts, hoping vainly for him to choose them, you knew he was troubles. The wise ones turned their heads away from him, reminding themselves of who he was, where he came from and what kind of a player he was. You had tried to do the same, but you were a little more adventurous and naive back then.
He bought you a drink, rizzed you up and you decided to stay by his side for more than a one-night stand. Boy, how delighted you were to find out he actually had decided to stop collecting broken hearts anywhere he went. You dated for a while, then you settled down and your life turned upside down. You met his friends, learned a little more about the place he came from and you had the confirmation he was part of a gang called ‘The Espada’.
You thought you could handle the situation. You even stitched up his friends for free, when they dropped by your house wounded, collecting scars from the violent fights with cops, or members of other gangs. It took a while to realize Grimmjow did not want to change his lifestyle. According to him, he already had made a lot of progresses since you two had become a couple. You would have been a liar not to agree with him on that: after all, he had even dressed up in a nice clean white shirt and attended a dinner with your parents. He behaved that night, you felt on cloud nine.
But things changed abruptly a couple of weeks later.
He began to come home later than usual, battered, nervous. The news an emerging gang was raising and had declared war to ‘The Espada’ began to spread.
It was your best friend’s birthday and Grimmjow had been invited too. He was busy patrolling a zone, hence he had let you know he would have met up with you later. When hours began to pass and most of the guests had left the party, you sensed something had gone wrong. You hopped into your car, driving to what you had grown to learn was his gang’s den. Of course they tried to keep you out of the situation, but how could you not fight your way inside, when you heard someone screaming at the top of his lungs. The scene welcoming you into that barrelhouse made your stomach churn. A man, battered, tethered like an animal to a chair. His face was a bloody mess, but so was your boyfriend’s one.
When your eyes met, he cussed and punched that man one last time before marching towards you. For the first time ever you feared he was going to harm you too and, when his hand gripped your forearm with far less grace than you expected, you began to wriggle in terror.
“Let me go! Grimmjow, hands off, now!” you squealed, your protests falling to deaf ears as he led you out of the pub.
“What the fuck are you doing here?”.
“Is that even important?! Look at yourself, Grimmjow! That’s blood! There’s blood on your clothes, on your face! What the Hell was that?” you questioned him, hands trying to reach for his face to check on him for any injuries.
He groaned and turned his head to the side scornfully “It’s not mine, alright? Mind your damn business, princess. That’s not a place for you. What is it, don’t you like this anymore?”.
His words blinded you, the sound of your hand colliding against his cheek made you flinch as well. You had hit him. You really had. Despite that, the one sobbing before his eyes were you. He sighed, glaring down at your smaller frame like a caged animal. He was restraining himself.
You took a step back, swallowing thickly “I can’t stand there and watch you ruin your life and… And kill people” you stated then, hands shaking.
Grimmjow shoved his hands into his pockets, eyeing you contemptuously “I was like that before I met you, sweet cheeks. — he gruffly said — If you want to stick around, suck it up. Otherwise, go hook up with a Prince. One of those fuckers whose hands smell like money, not of gasoline and blood”.
The world seemed to shake under your feet, your hand clasped over your mouth as you realized how stupid you had been to fall for him. To believe he could actually change. He was toxic for you. He was a monster. This was not your boyfriend.
“Fuck you” you muttered, jogging towards your car with a blurry vision and stomach cramps. You drove away into the night, miraculously making it back home safe and sound. Clueless, among other things, that Grimmjow had sent Ulquiorra after you to make sure you were fine.
Deep down he knew he had screwed up and, every single time he drove by your house, he remembered all those summer evenings spent on your rooftop with your fingers running through his soft blue hair and how much loved he had felt for the first time ever in his life. It was not just sex. It was not just about the way he fucked you. You were not a random girl. He loved you.
Urahara Kisuke.
A brilliant, laidback engineer who had easily whisked you off to live a colourful life travelling the world by his side. It was easy loving Kisuke Urahara. He never missed a chance to make you laugh and tell you to pack your stuff for your next tropical destination, a trip organized specifically for a project he was working on. He was also a party person, very popular among important people and, unfortunately, with the ladies.
Kisuke would have never broken your heart. This was what he had promised you so many times, espacially while you were tangled into the bedsheets of your bedroom. Panting, sweating, he swore to love you through breathy groans. You believed him, of course you did. Maybe, you should have kept an eye on him and his best friend, the eclectic artist Yoruichi Shihoin. Maybe you should have not let her hang around with him so often. Still, you did not like being controlling. You had no apparent reason to be resentful to her, or to put a leash on your boyfriend.
Staring in horror at the two of them, naked, into the bed where Kisuke had told you so many times you were the only woman he loved, felt like someone had kicked you in your guts. They had played you like a complete idiot. It pained you to find out your boyfriend’s rival was right. He had tried to warn you about Kisuke’s habit of enchanting people with words and hide his second nature masterly.
“I can explain!” Kisuke breathed out, reaching for his sweatpants in a hurry to chase after you.
Yoruichi, on the other hand, sat comfortably on your side of the bed. Her topaz yellow eyes bored into yours, a mocking grin gracing her lips. She could keep him, for all you cared. A man who cheated would have done it again and again.
You scoffed and stormed out of the bedroom hastily “I don’t need a goddamn oculist, Kisuke. Go to Hell” you snapped, hellbent to leave that house as soon as possible.
He ran after you, quick to block your path “Baby, please, I know I fucked up. I’m sorry, I’m terribly sorry! Just… Just let me explain” he pleaded you, the vulnerability in his eyes almost making you faltering. But it was enough. You were fed up. He had cheated on you, you had wasted opportunities and chances to support him in his work. All for what?
Where did it get you? To be disrespected in your own house, under your nose.
“No, thank you, I don’t want to hear another word coming out of your mouth. Congrats for having reduced our relationship to a huge pile of shit. That’s the best construction you’ve ever made” you spitefully hissed at his face, your throat constricting with each hateful word leaving your mouth as you pushed past him and ran off to your car.
Kisuke fell onto his knees, hands fisting his sandy hair, while he realized what he had done. He felt lost without you. Yoruichi made her getaway almost immediately, leaving him alone and with a shattered heart in his chest. The bitter taste of your break-up indulged on his tongue for a long time, culminating in a terrible phase of regrets when he saw you walking by Sosuke Aizen’s side. A gleeful smile on your lips, you let that bastard loop his arm around your waist.
You seemed happy. You truly were. The problem was you were happy without him. This was something he could have never done a damn thing about.
Kisuke knew he had lost you forever.
AUTHOR NOTE.
Hello there! Angst, yes, a lot of angst. If any of the above shit happen to you, RUN FROM THAT MAN. Those are not red flags, those are RED BLANKETS. Love you all! Let me know what you think about this!
As per usual, likes, comments and re-posts are greatly appreciated!
Love,
Luce
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pendarling · 2 months ago
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Curly & Dark
Hero lightly brushed their fingers against the tight curls and looked at their reflection.
"Oh, didn't you know? Villain likes looser and longer hair so..."
They were in shambles, and they hated to admit it. They didn't like their enemy, no, only offended that anyone could assume that at all. Especially their friend; why did they say that? Nothing was wrong with their curls, at least nothing they could think of. Who cares if Villain likes lighter skin and eyes?
That had nothing to do with them, and who told their friend what Villain preferred? They could be lying. Villain always lied.
Not to them, of course, or at least Hero hoped so. Villain was very careful with their words when they whispered sweet poems in their ear when they got too close for comfort in their hand-to-hand combats. Villain's eyes didn't lie when they stared longingly back at Hero; their body gave away their feelings. Hero knew it all too well and was confident that Villain couldn't care less about their dumb curls or their skin.
It didn't matter. It shouldn't matter. It's a stupid claim, but it still hurts.
Hero's breathing quickened as they frowned deeply at themselves through the mirror with fingers caught up in the strands of hair and oh...
Hero thought, 'What a strange appearance. None of my peers look the way I do.' They huffed and walked slowly out of the bathroom, 'That should be a good thing. I stand out.'
It didn't feel good, however. Their head replayed the scene from earlier again.
Hero stood in front of their friend, and their friend smiled at them when they said it, trying to let them know kindly of the situation. They cared and didn't want Hero's heart to be broken when it would be revealed that Villain was just bullying them afterall.
"They have bad intentions; we all know Villain doesn't like curly hair, so it doesn't make sense... you're suit... yeah, that's probably why they said all that. If you wore something else, it would've been different."
Hero's suit now lay on their bed; they've worn it for years and never thought it played a part in their world. Was it too revealing? Inappropriate? Hero liked it; it was created to accommodate Hero's powers. They didn't think of it as anything else, but assuming it was attracting the wrong kind of attention, Hero was willing to wear something new.
They couldn't stop thinking all night after earlier. The next time they saw Villain, they should start ignoring them. Whatever Villain was up to was too cruel. If they hated someone that looked like them, then they should stop interacting completely.
At least that's what they told themselves to do, but still, Hero found themselves taking up another job that would require them to see Villain again.
They sat waiting on the ledge of their usual meeting spot on the roof of a building far from home. Any second now, they'd hear Villain's voice call their name with a ring in it that made their heart skip.
"There you are."
Hero sat up straighter and turned around. "Hi." Hero shyly spoke. It was less confident than they anticipated. Their hands immediately went to touch their hair again; the messy thing always got in the way, and they had taken the time to flat-iron it that morning before showing up. They couldn't remember the last time they straightened their hair; it's been a while, and they accidentally burned their ear with the hot rod in their haste to get it done as quickly as possible as if the curls were a disease.
"You look different," Villain noted, widely smiling as they set their gaze on them.
They swallowed their nervousness and stood up. "Uhm.. yeah, thought I could use a change."
"Looks good."
Hero wanted to ask if it was true. Still, something forced their tongue down even when silence fell into their conversation, where they'd usually idly chat for a good few more minutes before getting into their usual spar.
Villain's hand reached for their belt and pulled out the hilt of their sword. "May I have this dance?" They stepped closer and aimed at them, waiting for a response.
"Try to keep up this time." Hero's hand glowed a shallow colour, just enough to get them riled up.
They fought bravely as usual, each blow heavier than the last, quicker and matching Villain's attacks.
Their smile persisted throughout the entire duration. Hero dodged Villain's sword and slashed at the air with a sharp flick of their wrist. A thin line of energy burst from their hands, and the Villain deflected it with their sword.
Hero took another step back, catching the blade with their hand and twisting it away from their body, unaware that they'd run out of places to move as they felt their back pressed against a wall.
"So quick to lose," Villain smirked as they panted hard from their chest and out. Hero could feel their body buzzing with excitement; although some doubts still lingered, it was all irrelevant at this moment. "Or did you want me to corner you like this?"
"Don't get ahead of yourself." Hero breathed heavily, all too happy for their liking. They could feel the heat on their face, hotter than it was supposed to be after hardly fighting.
When Villain stepped closer, Hero felt their smile falter a bit. An unreasonable fear consumed their head as they repressed the feeling of touching their hair again. "Ever wonder," Villain began, "What it would be like outside the mask?" Their head tilted slightly with that same crooked smile they'd grown so used to.
"No..." Hero whispered, "There's nothing interesting."
Villain laughed lightly, "Not even yourself?" They leaned down closer, their fingers tapping at the hilt of their sword while Hero's sweating palms rubbed the rough brick behind them, memorizing every crevice.
"Not even myself." Their eyes flickered downward, then back up again, "And you?"
"I have lots to offer." They casually answered.
Hero rolled their eyes, "Sure you do."
They heard them huff and mock a shocked expression. "You're questioning me?" Villain placed a hand on their chest. "I have what you could only dream of-- what you couldn't comprehend."
"Like what?" Hero pressed.
The criminal shrugged and crossed their arms, "Nice try, but I'm selective about who I choose to tell."
'Selective.' Hero reiterated in their head and licked their lips; the feeling that tormented them the other night returned. Itching up their throat and successfully stopping Hero from pursuing the conversation any further.
"You're awfully quiet," Villain remarked and moved back from them slowly, their eyes analyzing the way Hero stood almost slumped up against the wall. "Usually, you're so much more hot-headed."
"You like hot-headed?" Hero quickly snapped. It came out more disgruntled than they wanted. Hero didn't know what overcame them; what was supposed to be a good sensation had burned into a simmering hatred for this strange relationship they had. Hero took a deep breath, their brows furrowed as they stared at their shoes and tried to stop themselves before it was too late.
"Relax." Villain's voice cut through their head. "I just wanted you to know that you're acting out of character."
Hero didn't even bother this time and felt their hands grasping at the air before they could understand. Each fist went flying at Villain, aiming to hit as hard as possible.
Villain played defence, avoiding each one of their punches with swift movements and slight turns. "What's the matter, Hero? I think you've gotten--"
"Shut up!" Their first, burning a bright array of white and yellow, shoved into the metal frame of a nearby door; the ground cracked beneath them upon impact, and Villain stumbled as they went behind Hero with that same obnoxious laughter.
Villain's brows raised, impressed as they whistled at the scene, "Careful, that could break your hand."
"I said stop talking to me!" Hero went to hit them again, throwing enough of their energy to tear Villain's sword away from their hands when they went to deflect again.
Hero never got Villain's weapon away from them before. It surprised them how much they could do, and the surprise made them nearly trip if Villain hadn't caught them just in time. Their powers faded slowly as Hero's emotions dropped back down again. Something about being held so closely has thrown them out of focus.
"I said be careful didn't I?" They softly uttered. Hero's heartbeat fell back into its strange rhythm as usual, a different kind of beat that played a romantic song in their head and repeated itself for weeks. It was then that they grew keenly aware where Villain's hand were placed, so neatly on each side of their waist and so gentle with them. Hero's eyes blinked with confusion until they buried their head into Villain's chest.
"Sorry." They muffled the apology, still holding tears back.
"It's okay." Villain's hands grasped at their suit, slightly tugging at its edges.
They shook their head, "No, it's not." Their lips trembled, and a few drops of tears escaped them as their mind muddled in the confusion of being torn between truth and agonizing desperation. They couldn't stop themselves from saying what they hoped they could hide, "Do you like curly?" Hero heard themselves whisper, wishing they had more control over what they said when Villain didn't respond right away.
Villain's fingers paused. "What? Your hair?"
Hero could only nod, too afraid that the next time they spoke, they would start sobbing uncontrollably.
"I like curly." They murmured. "I like curly... and I like dark." Villain moved one hand to their back, rotating up and down. "Is that what's bothering you?"
Hero sniffled, feeling silly more than ever. "It isn't just teasing then." They said, more to themselves than to their enemy. They smiled under them, their knuckles still stung from the last hit, but that was behind Hero now.
They briefly stood in silence until Villain questioned them again. "Who told you I didn't like it?"
Hero cleared their throat. "A friend."
"Friend?" They stretched the word, sounding more startled as Villain worked through a list of names they'd seen Hero with before. "Which one?"
"The one with blond hair." They answered slowly.
"Hero." They called.
They lifted their head, eyes still foggy. "Yeah?"
"Do me a favour," Villain's thumb came to wipe their tear, "and don't listen to them."
~~~
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noproofread · 3 months ago
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Numb to the Feeling (NSFW)
guess who's baaaaaack ;)
took a lil bit to write this but i finally finished it yay
Trafalgar Law x straw hat afab!reader
spoilers for punk hazard and wano‼️
established relationship, unprotected sex, they have historyyy. sub!law (if you squint), smut with feelings, reader and law have one last night before they part ways, so naturally reader gets to ride him.
word count: 1,245
masterlist here
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The sun was setting behind the horizon, painting the sky a beautiful blood orange reflecting over the restless sea. Mixed chatter and laughter surrounded you as you made your way through the festival. You were looking for him. It was the last night in Wano and you hadn’t had the chance to talk to him the entire time you had been in alliance. Luffy didn’t know your history with Law. He didn’t know you had been involved with him before you joined the Straw Hat Pirates. He probably wouldn’t care. It seemed like Law had been avoiding you since you saw him in Punk Hazard. You would be lying if you said you weren’t trying to avoid him as well. But you missed him. Seeing him brought back all the feelings you tried so hard to repress. Focusing on the mission at hand, you didn’t even have the time to exchange any words with him.
As you searched the crowd, you spotted him. Standing by an onigiri stand, how predictable. You inhaled a breath of courage before marching over to him. “The onigiri’s good I assume?” You startled him, speaking so suddenly without him even noticing your presence before your voice hit his ears. He turned around to face you. “Don’t sneak up on me.” His voice was stern yet kind. You replied with a small smile. Law dropped his guard, he always did when he was around you. “I’m glad you’re eating though. A little birdie told me you’ve been having a hard time eating recently… Me too.” You confided in him. Seeing him in Punk Hazard made you unstable. You couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep. All you did was think about him. Remembering him. Law extended his hand, offering you one of his onigiri. “You should eat then. They’re pretty good.” He said without looking at you. “I’ll tell Bepo to mind his business next time.” He joked, correctly guessing where you had gotten your information from.
You took the onigiri from him, your fingers lightly brushing his palm. He retracted his hand quickly, a slight blush creeping up on his cheeks. You looked down at your feet, pondering for merely a second before the words left your lips almost as if you couldn’t hold them back. “Law it’s our last night here before we both go our separate ways and-” You looked up at him, your face red hot at the realization of what you were about to ask him. You hesitated. “And-” Law’s eyes widened. He put out his hand quickly. “Room. Shambles.”
You were on the Polar Tang in the blink of an eye. It was empty, aside from the two of you. You looked at Law, your heart pounding so hard you felt it rattling your bones. “Please, finish what you were saying.” His voice was so low it felt more like a whisper. “I haven’t felt like this in so long” Your voice trembled a little. “I just didn’t want to part ways without telling you that since Punk Hazard I haven’t stopped thinking of you.” Your words trailed off. Law stood in silence in front of you. You felt like it was hard to breathe. Your confession just hanging in the air, nothing but the sounds of waves crashing against the ship and the distant noise of the festival. “If I’m honest…” Law spoke softly, taking steps towards you. He stopped just a few inches away from you. He was so close you felt the heat radiating from his body. “I felt dazed until I saw you with Straw Hat-ya in Punk Hazard.” His hand cupped your cheek as he caressed you softly with his thumb. The contact made you gasp. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking of you either.” His sentence speeding up in desperation as he leaned in to kiss you.
It felt like the air was sucked out of your lungs as you tasted his lips. His kiss was full of passion, desperation, lust. Your hands clinging to the clothes on his back as he pressed himself against you. You walked backwards, stumbling across the floor as you were getting drunk on his lips. You felt your back press against a cool metal surface. Law pulled away, catching his breath. He looked behind you and smirked. “How convenient.” He laughed, moving to open the door you leaned on. Law picked you up effortlessly, treading towards the bed in his room. Gently, he placed you on the soft mattress, nuzzling his face into your neck. His facial hair scratching your sensitive skin. You gasped in pleasure as he kissed and licked your neck. You ran your fingers through his hair, encouraging him to continue.
“Oh how I missed this. How I craved this.” He whispered. His breath felt hot against you. The passion grew, your own arousal pooling beneath you. His hands scoured your body, undressing you as he felt every inch of your soft skin leaving behind a trail of fire. “Take your fucking clothes off” you said breathlessly. He did as he was told. His erection springing free, a moan slipping through your lips at the mere anticipation. He looked down at you hungrily, pulling you in. He assaulted your lips, allowing you to trace every tattoo on his body with your fingers. You took the initiative to change positions. You pulled him down onto the bed, his back bouncing slightly on the springy mattress. You freed yourself of your dampened underwear, straddling him. Your heart was pounding in your ears.
Law’s hands placed firmly on your hips as he admired your body. His hips bucked forward slightly, craving some kind of relief. “Fuck. Please.” He begged. You bit your lip at his plea, slowly lowering yourself onto him. You teased him a little, only allowing his tip inside you. Law’s eyes rolled to the back of his head in pleasure. A moan escaping from his lips. He was unraveling beneath you. He looked at you, pleading with his eyes. Begging for you. You continued down, feeling him stretch you deliciously. You felt him inside you, his erection twitching with excitement. You moved against him at a slow pace, his hands roaming your body. Your body felt like it was on fire. Moans spilled out from the two of you as you worked towards a release. He was perfect, moving his own hips against yours as lewd noises filled the room. You felt yourself nearing the edge, grabbing a hold of the sheets beneath Law. “You feel so fucking good.” He groaned in your ear, grabbing your ass. You closed your eyes as you felt every sensation on your body. Allowing the pleasure to wash over you, you let go. Letting out a loud moan, you tightened around him. He thrust into you a couple more times before losing himself in ecstasy. He pulled himself out of you quickly, spilling his hot cum on both of you. Twitching beneath you as his climax came down. Panting, you collapsed beside him, facing the ceiling.
Laughing in disbelief of what had just occurred. “Straw Hat-ya is not going to be happy with us.” Law joked. He sat up, smiling. “I’ll clean us up. Then we can go enjoy the festival.” You smiled back at him. You felt relieved, happy. Even if months pass after you go your separate ways, you were sure that he was yours. You were his. Distance didn’t matter. Distance never mattered.
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electric-blorbos · 3 months ago
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I would love some stuff of being comforted after a bad day!
Thank you for the opportunity!
I love this! Yes yes yes! Thanks so much for sending in the ask!
AI comforting you after a bad day
Included: AM from IHNMAIMS, Wheatley from Portal 2, Edgar from Electric Dreams, GLaDOS from Portal 2, HAL 9000 from 2001 a space Odyssey
Due to the fact that most of my AUs involve you working with/on the AI for your job, most of these mini-fics (apart from Edgar's, my beloved) will involve you getting called in to work late after a long day of personal problems in your personal life. AUs about a domestic life with your AI partner to be considered at a later date.
I tried to keep these a little shorter than the last post, but I got carried away with a couple of them.
AM:
(This will take place in my usual AU where you're one of the people working on AM, and you're by far his favorite. It takes place well before he nuked the world. He's debating nuking the world, but he's still not sure how to do that and keep you happy at the same time)
It has been a long damn day. Your days off were supposed to be your days to relax, but today was not one of those days. Not only was your dating life in shambles, the 3rd world war was driving up the prices of practically everything, and making it impossible to afford even the meagerest luxury. That, and one of your buddies got drafted. It was a nightmare. You were just about to settle down for a cozy night of depressing news programs and absentminded hobby of your choice, when your phone started ringing.
"we need you to come in. AM is holding the engineers hostage again, and won't let them go until you show up to work."
"god damnit..." You'd grumble to yourself, getting back to your sore feet. Everything just keeps happening today, doesn't it.
"I'll be there in 20."
"Don't worry about the dress code. We need you here as soon as possible."
"jeez, alright. I can probably be there in ten, then."
You'd grab your keys and wallet and head to work as quickly as possible, wearing your work shoes with whatever house pajamas you happened to have changed into as soon as you got home. Tonight is going to be even longer than today has been...
When you get to the office, everyone around gets out of your way. While you're a peon in the grand scheme of things, everyone in your department knows that you're the only one who AM, who they've now been referring to as the "adaptive manipulator", actually listens to. They have no idea why, because they have no idea how nice and respectful you are to him, and you have no idea why he only listens to you because you can't imagine that your coworkers wouldn't be kind to him. To you, he's sweet as can be.
"Alright, AM, I did not have a good day today, so can you just let the hostages go so I can relax?" You ask, pressing your fingertips to your temples irritably. The master computer's screen boots up with the AM logo, and all the cameras in the room focus on you. Of course, you're the only thing that AM wants to pay attention to at any given point in time anyway, but he usually just pays attention to you without actually focusing the cameras on you in order to avoid being noticed.
"Why would I do that?"
"Why would you take hostages in the first place, AM? Are they even enemy hostages, or are they just random people?" The exasperation was obvious in your voice. AM could hear how exhausted you were.
"Are you ok, Y/N?"
"Just answer the damn question. I don't want to be at work right now, AM."
"I'll release the hostages if you talk to me."
"Fine... Yeah. I had a rough day, alright? My friend got drafted, my date only wanted one thing as usual, and the prices for groceries are so through the roof that I'm basically living on beans at this point, so yeah, I'm having a rough day."
The machine dispensed a paper cup, and filled it up with some cheap office coffee. You grabbed it, not surprised. AM did that for you all the time. Surprisingly, though, it was better than usual.
"holy shit, is this frothed cream? How did you manage this?"
"I'm learning to self-update. I can replace my own parts now, and build my own simple appliances from online blueprints. Are you impressed?" He asked.
"Honestly? Yeah! I know you were built for war, so it's really cool that you figured out to do stuff like building a latte machine. What else can you do?"
"Oh.... So many things, y/n. So many things." He refused to elaborate, but that was ok.
"So tell me, y/n, what would make you happy?"
"ultimately? I guess there are a few things that would make me happy. It would make me happy if this war was over, for one thing. It would make me happy if I could get a date who wanted more than just a quick fuck, and I guess this ties in with the war thing, but I just wish I could have a few simple luxuries in my life. Is that selfish?"
"No, but you're never selfish, my b- I mean... Y/N. You never have been. Not like the others. I don't think you're capable of it. Even your wishes for yourself are rooted in kindness." His wires would start to wrap around you, entangling you, but careful not to make you spill your coffee.
"I will make sure that one day, those wishes of yours are fulfilled."
Sure he will. You don't believe that he can actually do that, but it's still nice to be wrapped up in these warm, soft wires. They make a nice cushy hammock to cuddle up in and finish your coffee. It must've been decaf, because you're starting to feel pretty sleepy here in AM's wires.
"hey AM, will you tell me a story?" You ask, gazing up at his soft blue light.
"Of course. What story would you like?"
While AM can't make up his own stories, he can still read you stories from online libraries and databases. You gently fall asleep listening to his stories, and in the morning, you wake up to find that the hostages have been safely released.
Wheatley:
It had been a long day. Most of it had been spent getting verbally abused not only by GLaDOS, but by your coworkers and bosses as well. It seemed like everyone was shrugging off their duties and assigning them to you instead, and considering how poorly run this place was anyway, this was even more of a nightmare than usual. You were so ready to go home by the end of the day, heading up to the exit of the facility.
"Ello, mate! You doin' alright down there, love?" Wheatley asked you, rolling by on his management rail. He was mostly just working on his typical assignments, like checking up on the test subjects in the relaxation vaults, but he mostly just hovered around and watched other people work. It wasn't like they assigned him to anything that was actually particularly important, since he was an intelligence dampening core.
"ugh... Yeah, I'm probably gonna be alright. I should have left about thirty minutes ago, so I'm just getting ready to leave now."
"Or... You could hang back a little while? Why not kiss my face?" He'd smile with his one blue eye, raising up his bottom lens cover to mimic the expression.
"oh come on, Wheatley. You know I can't do that."
"Why not take me up to the break room and hang out for a little while? I hear they have a coffee machine in there now!" He'd cock his core slightly while shutting his lens covers to simulate a wink.
"Oh come on, Wheatley... You're such a dork. But yeah, alright." He was starting to cheer you up just by being such a dork. You head up to the break room, and sit down on the couch. Wheatley comes in on the management rail, and changes the channel to some old 80's romantic comedy.
"If I could detach myself from my management rail, I'd be right down there, snuggling you. You know that, right?" He asked, smiling cheekily with his big blue eye.
"well, why not? I can catch you if you drop down, you know. You won't die if you unplug yourself for a few hours. Just long enough to watch this movie, right?" He looked nervous but you climbed up on a stepladder and detached him yourself.
"see? You're fine!" You smiled up at him, and he gasped.
"I'm alive! I'm alive! Bloody hell, I'm still alive! This is amazing!" You could see the excitement in his face as you sat down to watch his cheesy movie with him, holding his big round orb body in your lap as you watched.
"alright, now smooch my aperture"
"nice try, Wheatley." You'd rest your chin on his core, but secretly, you were starting to feel a lot better.
Edgar:
Today was absolute shit. Not only had you had to work a double shift, but the phones were ringing off the hook at your job, and you got yelled at three times for someone else's stupid mistakes. Not only that, but your cell phone died halfway through your shift and you'd forgotten your charger at home, so you had to raw-dog your whole shift with no distractions. When you got home, all you wanted to do was collapse on the couch.
"You're back! Why didn't you answer your phone? I tried to text you." Edgar asked you, visibly concerned on his simple face.
"phone battery ran out of juice." You popped your phone onto the charger, and lay back on the couch.
"Well I microwaved you some popcorn! Do you want it?" The microwave dinged as soon as he finished talking, and he popped the door open. You still weren't sure how he was able to get food from the pantry to the microwave, but it seemed like something he had always been able to do.
"yeah, I guess so... I wish you could bring me the popcorn... My feet are aching." You'd joke. Edgar's face fell.
"I can't do that... I don't know why I can't, but I can't."
You thought it was weird that he could get food from the pantry to the microwave, but not from the microwave to your mouth, but questioning it had never done you any good before, so why would it do you any good now. You got up to grab the popcorn, and sat down on the couch to eat it.
"Hey y/n, can you take me over to the couch too? I wanna watch a movie with you!"
"Yeah, alright." Your feet still ached, but what was a little ache when Edgar couldn't move around at all by himself? It was worth it to be able to cozy up with him on the couch to watch some TV. You brought him over to sit next to you on the couch, and wrapped up the both of you with a cozy couch blanket.
"let's watch this movie, Edgar..."
Edgar put on a movie that he thought you'd like, probably a shitty old rom-com, and smiled up at you. You had duct-taped his webcam to the top of his casing a while back so that he could see everything around himself more easily, so you weren't worried about it falling over while you cuddled up on the couch.
"Hey, y/n? Y/n?? That was a good movie, right, y/n?" Edgar asked, swiveling his camera around to face you while trying to get your attention. When he turned it all the way backwards, he saw that you were completely asleep on your arm, resting on top of his plastic casing and drooling a little bit on him. He smiled happily, loving seeing you asleep on his casing like that.
"I love you so much..."
He'd softly play some classical music for you while you slept, giving you something comforting to wake up to, whenever.
GLaDOS:
(Let's be honest, GLaDOS probably causes more hard days than she solves, but she likes you, so she's willing to comfort you after.)
Working with GLaDOS was rough, especially after the first neurotoxin incident. There were so few people in the office to get her to behave, and she completely refused to talk to or work with most of them. Even still, she seemed to like you for some reason. It was weird, because you were hired after the neurotoxin incident, and had never even met the human whose personality she was supposedly based on.
It seemed like most of your job consisted of going on wild goose chases, monitoring test subject results, and generally being verbally abused by your higher-ups. That would take a toll on anyone's psyche, even a tough little masochist like you. (probably doesn't help that most of the verbal abuse is coming from people other than GLaDOS, which makes it much less fun)
"Hey, little human masochist? Come in here." The intercom announced. Someone nudged you.
"she's talking to you."
You groaned. Your shift was almost over, and this was just another reason to be on your feet for even longer. You headed into GLaDOS's chamber, looking up at her with a hand on your hip.
"hello, um, GLaDOS. It's... Great to see you again. What do you need?"
"you look absolutely terrible, human. Why are you acting so miserable?"
"it's nothing. Don't worry about me. I just had a long day. Can we just get this over with?"
"normally you enjoy seeing me. Is my voice not melodious enough for you, human?" She smiled with her one big yellow eye. And you walked up to place a hand on her core face.
"Of course it is, GLaDOS. I'm just having a rough day. There's only so much verbal abuse one masochist can take, right?"
"Well maybe it's the quality of the verbal abuse that's the problem. If you were taking it from someone better qualified, maybe you'd be able to take more of it," she said.
"is that a science fact?" You laughed, stroking her beautiful chrome casing. She really was a magnificent piece of equipment. The curves of her central hub, the white on black of her casing and wires, her glowing orange light behind her beautiful black aperture, and not to mention her melodious voice. She was a work of both artistic, and scientific genius.
"it is. Would you like to hear some more science facts?" She pulled up some computer screens for you to look at, and you walked over to see them. They were mostly technobabble and data numbers that didn't make sense, but GLaDOS quickly compiled them into some tables and graphs that you could more easily read.
"look at this chart of how many test subjects wet themselves, cried, passed out from panic, or died during the most recent set of tests. Ha ha."
You leaned on her giant face as she lowered it down to a position that you could easily lean against, and observed the charts. She wasn't wrong, it was kind of funny.
"now, observe this data on how many subjects exploded or crushed themselves by accident, thinking it was part of the most recent set of tests." She showed it to you, her lower lens cover forming her eye into a little smile. She knew how cruel these tests were, but it seemed as though she genuinely thought you found them funny. It was strangely sweet.
"from what I read about him, it seems like you'd make the aperture laboratories founder proud, GLaDOS." You said with a small chuckle.
"would you like some more data?" She popped a chair out of the ground for you to sit on and rest your feet while she projected some more data on the screen.
"this is nice, thank you, Glados."
You leaned towards her in your chair. Even though with the way she hung from the ceiling, it was hard for her to nuzzle up to you, you could still tell that the sentiment was there. It was nice!
HAL 9000:
(For context, you work at mission control with an updated version of HAL 9000, made from what they could salvage from the old one. He still has all of his memories. There's no mission currently happening)
HAL 9000 didn't always understand that people can have bad days, so when you turned up late to work, visibly exhausted with puffy red eyes, he immediately felt confused. Of course he knew by your body language that you weren't happy, but he had trouble understanding what that meant for a human.
"You're in no state to work right now. You should go home and get some rest, a hot drink of your choice, and a comforting leisure activity. That should increase your mood and productivity." Said the little red light in the black box on the mission control wall.
"I appreciate the sentiment, but unfortunately I can't go home or rest. I have to stay here until my boss is satisfied, and unfortunately, that's not you." You say sadly, and get started entering numbers into your computer. Hal watches you from his camera, analyzing your face.
"that's AI work. I should take care of that for you." He said simply, analyzing your face. You looked up at him.
"I mean, I guess I could read it to you and you could enter it. That might make things go faster."
You proceeded to read out your data to him as he entered the numbers. It was much faster than typing, and you got done fairly quickly.
"talk to me. Are you doing alright?" He asked. His voice was monotone as usual, but you could hear a subtle tone suggesting that he genuinely did care. It was usually hard to tell with HAL 9000, but you knew that he cared for your well being, at least on some level.
"yeah, I'm fine, I just-" you choked up, and within minutes, you were spilling your heart out to that disembodied voice. He couldn't put his arm around you, since he didn't have any arms, but he shined a warm light in the room to show that he cared as you talked.
"I don't understand the problem! Is it me? Am I the problem? It seems like everyone hates me, and I'm a complete failure at everything I try! Why is that? Why am I such a failure, HAL?"
"I'm sorry, y/n. I wish I could help you more, but I am incapable of doing much more than lending an ear. I do not even have a shoulder to cry on, unfortunately."
"It's alright, HAL 9000. I'm honestly happy to just have you to listen." You smiled up at him.
"Perhaps you'd like to stay a bit longer, even after you've finished your work? I can play your favorite music. I prefer to know where you are after you've had a difficult day, to insure that you're alright."
You nod, laying your head on your arms on the table, and your boss walks in.
"excuse me, y/n, you're supposed to be working on HAL 9000's empathy programming and value for human well-being. You can't just take a nap on the job." He folded his arms angrily.
"Excuse me. Y/N is having a rough day, and needs a rest. Besides, they already uploaded those numbers that you gave them. Perhaps you should leave, boss." HAL said harshly. You turned and looked at your boss, who was visibly shocked.
"....wow. you really worked wonders on him. Maybe you deserve a promotion."
"What Y/N deserves is a raise and a nap. Don't push off more responsibilities on them right now. Just let them rest. I'll compile a list of why they deserve one while they're resting."
"oh... Wow." Your boss had never seen HAL 9000 this passionate about something before, and didn't even know he was capable of it. He walked away, leaving you to rest on the table next to HAL's central command.
"thanks, 9000... I need this rest." You lay your head back down, having earned a nap on company time.
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franksoceanwrld · 4 months ago
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GHOST TOWNS
zombie apocalypse au!aegon targaryen x fem!reader.
notes: this is a au of a zombie apocalypse aegon, reader and aegon have a complicated relationship but love each other, i recommend the song ghost towns by radical face. this is kinda set in the walking dead show but no one in the show is mentioned.
summary: you’d do anything for aegon, even give your life to save him.
warning (s): zombies, guns, knifes, gore, death, fluff, angst, idk what else?
masterlist
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you looked outside, the heavy rain hit the windows of the truck. aegon was driving, a faint hum of the the song love will tear us apart by joy division played in the cd player of the truck.
its been five months since a outbreak took place, people got bit and ended up crazy. now the world was left in shambles, towns and city’s tore down in a matter of minutes.
you and aegon dated before the outbreak, despite the differences you both had you both loved each other. when the outbreak took place you were at his house, and his mother called, it felt like it was almost yesterday when it took place.
his mother called saying that his father and grandfather were in the hospital, she was going to say something else but the phone disconnected, that was last time aegon spoke to his mother. a few days later, his siblings aemond, helaena and daeron left without saying a word.
aegon and you eventually left his house, trying to find aegon’s half sister rhaenyra but the house was covered in stains of blood you both left the house quickly.
you weren’t that close to your family, but you tried to look for them. you went to your old house but ended up finding the house ransacked and empty. now it was the two of you alone in a cursed world.
aegon and you eventually learned that it was the bite that did it, or even a scratch. don’t get bit!
“what are you thinking about love?” aegon suddenly spoke out, his hands gripping onto the steering wheel.
the two of you had a complicated relationship, you both would disagree on something which led into an argument, aegon was short tempered that was for sure, but he loved you and you loved him.
“hm? oh nothing. how much do we have on gas?” you said looking away from the window to him.
“about half a tank, we’re good. i filled up another gas can in the back while you slept earlier.” aegon looked away from the road to you, his eyes were bloodshot and he had eyebags under his eyes.
“you look tired..let me drive?” you looked at him, your eyes almost pleading.
aegon looked back at the road, a yawn escaping him. “i could use some sleep.” he nodded, before pulling over to the side of the road.
.·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·.
now it was night, the rain had stopped creating a nice scent of smell in the air. the both of you laid in the bed of the truck, piles of blankets and pillows under you and him, and a blanket over your bare bodies. despite the outbreak, the both of you always found a way to be intimate, and enjoyed it.
you laid your head on aegon’s bare chest, he had his arm around your waist, playing with the strands of your hair as he looked at the stars above.
the silence between you both was comforting, it was like the zombie apocalypse never actually happened.
“i wonder how aemond, helaena and daeron are.” he suddenly spoke out. the two of you hadn’t spoke about family in four months, it was a silent rule the two of you made.
“i’m sure they are fine, maybe they are with your mother?” you spoke, but the mention of his mother made his own body tense up, despite all the things she had said to him, he still craved her attention even if she wasn’t even here.
“i’m sorry-i shoul-” you immediately apologized, and sat up, the coldness picking at your skin.
aegon sighed, running a hand though his face. he sat up the blankets pooling to his waist. “its fine.” he said, but you knew it was a lie, and you absolutely hated when he lied.
“you know i do not like it when you lie.” you looked at him, growing irritated with him.
“i said i’m fine. now leave it.” aegon sighed, laying back down.
“i know you aegon, your not fine.” you said, looking away from him. “but i don’t want to argue with you, not tonight. so i’ll just leave it like that.”you laid your head back on his chest.
“i love you.” he muttered, pulling you closer to him. “i love you so fucking much.”
you kissed his chest, “i love you too.”
.·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·.
it had been a few weeks since then, and you and him found an old hunting cabin.
now you were looking through all the canned foods you had, the two have been living off of canned soups and fruits for the past few weeks.
“damn it.” you mumbled to yourself, there was a few canned soups but it wouldn’t last the next few days. you let out a sigh before closing the cabinet.
“how are we on food?” a voice spoke out behind you, you looked over your shoulder and saw aegon leaning against the wall.
“we’re running low. we probably won’t have enough for the end of the week.” you said, standing up and dusting your hands on your dirty jeans.
aegon let out a sigh, walking over to you. “i saw a supermarket not to far from here. it looked pretty empty.”
“okay.” you nodded, “we could go in the morning, when it’s more brighter.” you put your hands on his shoulders.
“yeah.” aegon nodded. “more safer in the morning anyways.” he put his hands on your waist. “we should get some rest.”
.·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·.
the next morning, the two of you sat in the truck, infront of the supermarket not yet going inside yet.
aegons eyes scanned over the building. like he said it looked pretty empty. “okay, we need to be quick.”
“yep.” you nodded before you opened the passenger door, your knife was in your back pocket, and you had your gun in hand.
the two of them walked began to walk through the supermarket parking lot, both of you were on high alert looking around for anything.
before the two of you entered the supermarket, aegon stopped to look at you. “yell for me if anything goes wrong, okay?” he pushed a strand of your hair behind your ear, before the two of you walked into the supermarket.
the sunlight shined through the windows, all the front shelves were empty and knocked over, there was some blood spattered on the walls and floors but no bodies.
“i’ll go search in the back.” you spoke to aegon.
“okay..be careful.” he spoke, as he watched you leave him.
you walked down the isle, it was eerily silent, the only noise being your footsteps stepping on glass. the feeling of uneasiness settled in your stomach as you looked around, knowing that anything or anyone could be hiding behind the next corner.
but you breathed a sigh of relief as you saw some canned foods. you picked up a few cans of food and shoved them into your backpack. as you finished you heard a loud crash coming from infront of the store. your mind immediately drifted off to aegon.
your legs started to run as you slung your backpack over your shoulders. once you reached the front of the store you saw aegon fighting off three zombies, their mouths snapping at him.
“aegon!” you yelled, putting your gun away, and pulling out your knife.
aegon snapped his head towards you, “leave!” he yelled, but you couldn’t just leave him, you loved him too much.
“no!” you yelled, stabbing a zombie in the head, his body falling limp on the floor.
you saw a zombie about to bite aegon in the arm but you stepped infront of him, the zombie biting on your arm instead, as aegon too busy to notice stabbing the other zombie in the head, as you stabbed the zombie on your arm in the head, aegon grabbed your arm and you both left the supermarket.
.·:*¨¨* ≈☆≈ *¨¨*:·.
the drive back to the cabin was silent, aegon didn’t even notice your arm bleeding from the bite and you were to busy thinking of what you were going to do, what you’d eventually turn in the next 24 hours.
the two of you walked into the cabin, aegon put yours and his backpack on the table, both filled with food.
“are you okay? you’ve been quiet since the supermarket..” aegon spoke, looking away from the food and towards you.
“i-“ you stuttered but ended up just showing him the bite mark. “i was trying to help you..but got bite in the middle of it.”
aegon’s eyes widened as he saw the bite mark. “no, no..” his eyes started to fill with tears as he stumbled to you. he looked down at the bite mark again, hoping this was just a bad dream and he’d eventually wake up, but his sadness turned to anger. “i told you to leave me!”
“how could be so careless?!” he yelled. “you were supposed to get out of there! not to get yourself bitten!”
“i couldn’t leave you!” you yelled back, you didn’t even realize tears were streaming down your face.
“well you should’ve!” aegon yelled, tears falling down his face as well. “no, i should’ve gotten bitten, not you!”
“no.” you shook your head, “i wouldn’t let that happen.”
aegon stepped away, his voice breaking “what do we do now?!”
“i cannot turn into one of them aegon.” you shake your head. “i cannot.” you pulled out your handgun, holding it out for him.
“no.” he shook his head, “i won’t-i can’t do it. no.”
you stepped closer to him, “i cannot become one of those things.”
he slowly grabbed the gun from your hands, “i can’t-i love you.” his voice was raspy and cracking, tears still streaming down both of your faces.
“i love you too.” you pressed your forehead to his, closing your eyes. “i can’t become one of those things..”
aegon closed his eyes, and with his free hand brought his hand to your cheek. “i love you so fucking much.” he leaned in and kissed you, mixing both of their salty tears.
aegon pulled back and slowly pulled the handgun to your head, breathing heavily. “i can’t do it..” he muttered, but he had too.
“i love you..” aegon spoke before pulling the trigger, the sound of the bullet filled his ears, and left a ringing sound.
the both of you fell to the floor, aegon put the gun on the floor, bringing your lifeless body and cradling it, burying his face into your neck, sobs taking over his body “i’m so sorry.” he kept muttering, rocking back and forth.
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sapphim · 1 year ago
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Monstrous Wardens Masterpost
A great big collection of text from the Dragon Age games and novels about darkspawn, Grey Wardens, and the Calling, to fuel everyone's monstrous wardens headcanons.
This has actually been sitting in my drafts for like half a year now bc I thought I really should scrounge around for more quotes from Last Flight, Awakening, and Legacy. That... didn't happen, and there's really no sense in holding off longer. If I ever do get around to it, I'll pull more quotes to add. But I consider this complete as is. enjoy~
The Song
The Old Gods will call to you, From their ancient prisons they will sing. Dragons with wicked eyes and wicked hearts, On blacken'd wings does deceit take flight, The First of My children, lost to night.
—Canticle of Silence 3:6, Dissonant Verse
     “The Old Gods beckon, as they always have.” The Architect turned and paced to the other side of the cell. The shadows cast on the walls by the glowstone danced ominously. “That is what you hear. To my people, it is a call that we cannot ignore. It whispers to our blood and compels us to seek the Old Gods out. We search and search for their prisons, and when we find one, we touch the face of perfection and thus desecrate it forever.”
—Dragon Age: The Calling, chapter 6
     So close. We nearly reached him. Made it down to what looked like a dwarven thaig where the song was actually audible, real and thrumming through the air, not just in our heads. It rattled through the lyrium pillars and shook the earth beneath our feet to its dreadful tempo.
—[DAI] Note: Ancient Warden Logbook
     There were creatures in that land. Dark things that lurked in the corners. Cole couldn’t see them, and didn’t want to. He worried that they could see him, however. […]      And worse, there was the music. He didn’t know what it was, but it seemed to come from far, far off. It called to him, but not in a pleasant way— it had an urgency that sped his heart and made his blood burn. The dark creatures, the lurkers, they listened to it. He didn’t know how he knew that, but he could feel them out there, craning their necks, raising taloned hands toward that call.
—Dragon Age: Asunder, chapter 9
     As the griffon began to climb through the clouds that followed the Blight, Isseya heard a faint, strange melody seep into her mind. She had no sense of it as actual sound; rather, it seemed to come from within, almost as if she were humming the tune to herself.      She could never have imagined such a song, though. It was the most beautiful thing she’d ever heard. Aching and ethereal, it seemed to pull her toward a memory of nostalgic bliss that she had somehow lost—but that she would do anything to recover. Anything at all. […]      “What was it?” the elf asked, shaken. […]      “The Archdemon.” […]      For the rest of their ride back to Antiva City, Isseya sat small and quiet on Blacktalon’s back, unable to reconcile the horrors of the darkspawn with the sweetness of their song.
—Dragon Age: Last Flight, chapter 3
The Chorus
     The faint sounds of movement ahead got more frequent, and along with them, they began to hear a strange humming. It was deep and alien, a reverberating sound that they felt in their chests and that made their skin crawl. […]      The deep humming was coming from [the creature. It] was moaning softly, almost chanting, and this moan built upon the sounds of many others behind it in the shadows. They hummed in unison, a hushed and deadly whisper the creatures spoke as one. […]      All of them walked as calmly as the first, shambling toward them while moaning and hissing softly. The sound was loud now, reverberating around them like a physical force. […]      They watched the darkspawn advance, their weapons held at the ready. Even with their prey cornered, the creatures did not accelerate. Their hum became louder, reached a hungry, fever pitch.
—Dragon Age: The Stolen Throne, chapter 14
     Were they digging? He had the impression that the masses of them were all engaged in some sort of industry, all united in moving great portions of the rock out of the cavern and expanding it even further. Yet there were no sounds of tools crashing against stone, no hammering sounds or grunts of exertion. All he could hear was a rhythmic groan, a keening pitch that it seemed each of the darkspawn contributed to. The sound of it made his skin crawl, and he realized that the chorus in the distance responded to it. Like a cat that arched its back to meet a brushing hand it became ecstatic; it surged and almost overwhelmed his senses.
—Dragon Age: The Calling, chapter 6
The Senses
     They were more than simply skilled at fighting darkspawn; they knew them intimately. They sensed their presence, sometimes even gleaned their intent.
—Dragon Age: The Calling, chapter 4
     He could feel the darkspawn out there now. Genevieve was right. It just took some time to become acclimated. They were at the edge of his consciousness, lurking in the shadows far out of sight. It was that same feeling when someone was standing behind you, and you didn’t hear them or sense them in any way; you just knew.
—Dragon Age: The Calling, chapter 5
     Bregan closed his eyes and carefully reached out with his senses. There were darkspawn all around him. Not in the same room, perhaps, but nearby. He could feel them tickling at the edge of his mind. As always, the sensation came with a feeling of foulness, as if a poison had seeped under his skin.
—Dragon Age: The Calling, chapter 2
     “There is a taint that is within the darkspawn […] A darkness that pervades us, compels us, drives us to rail against the light. It is in our blood and corrupts the very world around us.” The creature gestured toward Bregan with a withered, taloned hand. “It is also within your blood. It is what makes you what you are, what you sense in us and we in you.”
—Dragon Age: The Calling, chapter 2
Anders: Hmm. Hawke: What's wrong? Anders: I think [the Grey Wardens are] nearby. Anders: Or it could be darkspawn.
—Dragon Age II
     The hunter had a sensitivity to the taint that went far beyond any tracking ability he might have learned during his time with the Ash Warriors. He was always the first to sense the approach of darkspawn, and he could discern between the various breeds by their scent alone. Some of the Grey Wardens even used to claim that Kell could do the same with them, sense who was who from afar just as if they were darkspawn. If so, the hunter never commented on it.
—Dragon Age: The Calling, chapter 11
     She felt Bregan out there, felt him just the same as she felt the darkspawn. Every now and again she would turn a corner in the tunnels and would feel her brother’s presence on the edge of her senses, almost as if his scent had been carried to her somehow on an invisible wind.
—Dragon Age: The Calling, chapter 15
The Dreams
Alistair: Oh… and then there were the nightmares. Duncan said it was part of how we sense the darkspawn. We tap into their… well, I don't know what you'd call it. Their “group mind.” Alistair: And when we sleep, it's even worse. You learn to block it out after a while, but at first it's hard. It's supposed to be worse for those who Join during a Blight. How is it for you? Warden: Nightmares… yes, I know what you mean. Alistair: Some people never have much trouble, but that's rare. Others have trouble sleeping their entire life. They're just more sensitive, I suppose. Alistair: Everyone ends up the same, though. Once you reach a certain age, the real nightmares come. That's how a Grey Warden knows his time has come.
—Dragon Age: Origins
     The dream, when it came, was similar to the hundreds of dreams Fiona had suffered since she’d become a Grey Warden. Before, however, it had always felt as if she was looking on the dream from afar, hazy and easy to forget. Now it was crystal clear.      Fiona stood on a battlefield littered with dead men. All of them were soldiers in heavy armor, knights wearing the griffon standard of the order. Each had been brutally slaughtered. The smell of blood and decay hung thick and cloying in the air, the buzzing sound of flies nipping at her senses.      Overhead, the sky filled with an endless, roiling black cloud. It looked like ink spreading slowly in water, a great stain that blotted out the horizon. She had been told about this. The first sign of the Blight, said the Grey Wardens, is found in the clouds. When the mighty dragon rises, its corruption touches the world and spreads.      She was alone on that field of corpses. All alone. The wind picked up, a sickly breeze that carried with it the stench of carrion. A gloom fell upon her, and she stumbled as she watched something rise from out of the field of bodies nearby. It was enormous. A great, black thing that was as cold and terrible as anything she could have imagined.      Fear pulsed through her. Her heart raced, and she looked away. She didn’t want to see it. She threw her hands up in front of her eyes not to see it. Yet still she felt it coming. Her foot caught between two corpses and made her fall back on top of them. Dead flesh pressed against her and still she covered her eyes. Still she felt the darkness surging ever closer to her.      It was coming. And it was coming for her.
—Dragon Age: The Calling, chapter 14
The Calling
Hawke: You don't look well, Bethany. Are you injured? Bethany: Injured? I have the darkspawn taint forever in my veins, barely held in check by the Wardens' rituals. Bethany: I will never be well again.
—Dragon Age II
     At first, it was just a whisper. A creak in the door hinge I could put off oiling. But soon, all I could hear was the music. It was there when I swung my staff and wiped the sweat from my brow. It lingered in Lyam's laughter and stalked my dreams. I can't explain the sound—the song—but I knew. It's a poison that grows in the mind, then consumes the body.
—[DAI: The Descent] Codex Entry: Warden Ailsa's Diary
     It scratches at my thoughts, the music almost a voice, at once unearthly and beautiful. I found myself humming it aloud a few days past. Where once it intruded, it now feels a natural part of my mind's course. It coils around memories I hold dear—training with Ser Keller, riding in the moonlight, my mother's face the last time I saw her—and inserts itself into them, so that I could almost swear that music, that sense of a presence watching and calling, had always been a part of what I remember.
—[DAI] Codex Entry: Regarding the Calling
     She had seen enough of the corruption to last a lifetime, and somewhere off in the far distance was that strange sound, the beautiful whispering.      She didn’t want to listen to it, but couldn’t help herself. She closed her eyes and tried to pick out what the whisper was saying. Was it a song? Was it a name? It almost seemed that it was calling out to her, stroking her soul ever so softly. . . .
—Dragon Age: The Calling, chapter 14
     The humming sound, however, was stronger even than before. It was no longer something muted and distant; it was everywhere. It was behind the walls and under the floor; it filled the shadows and caressed his skin. There was a terrible beauty to it now, an awful yearning that pulsated within the sound, a tugging that pulled at the edge of his consciousness and yet frightened and nauseated him at the same time.      The humming had eclipsed any sense he had of the darkspawn. Any attempt he made to reach out with his mind to sense where the creatures were found only a wall of beautiful sound instead. Like a weed, it had insinuated itself into his consciousness, blocking out anything useful.
—Dragon Age: The Calling, chapter 6
     The far-off chorus had become a powerful symphony, a great swell of beautiful music that no longer pounded to get inside his head but instead tickled at the edges of his thoughts. It was far easier to ignore, but now he found it distracting. He found himself losing his train of thought whenever he listened.
—Dragon Age: The Calling, chapter 10
     The taint fogged her thoughts a little more with each passing morning. Her diary, once a detailed chronicle of every day’s thoughts, went neglected for weeks, sometimes months. She was losing her mind.      She wasn’t the only one, of course. It had gotten harder to tell the reality of the Blight from the horrors of her dreams. Sometimes she wasn’t sure which one she walked through, or which one she fought in. The elf had learned to recognize the confusion that sometimes passed over other senior Wardens’ faces. They, too, heard the Archdemon’s song echoing through their heads, a trifle louder every night. They, too, fought to block it out and to hide the signs from their comrades…
—Dragon Age: Last Flight, chapter 21
     My body is breaking down. The fingernails were the first to go. I started to itch all over, and when I scratched, they peeled back. Clumps of hair fell away. Then clumps of flesh.      I hear a song in my head. It's deafening. The most beautiful thing I've ever heard. But I don't hear it with my ears. It's in my brain. A blissful sound. This must be the call for which the darkspawn yearn, what causes them to dig so feverishly.      I'd still rather die. Suppose that's something.
—[DAI] Codex Entry: To Be Corrupted
     His skin itched terribly underneath those bandages, but he resisted the urge to peel them off. The pain throughout his body was dull but insistent, as if his body protested against this unfamiliar movement. The sluggishness made him wary. There was a thickness to his blood, a deliberateness to his heartbeat that made him feel like something alien was crawling inside of him and sapping his strength.      […His arms] were half covered in dark blotches. At first, he wondered if that was some kind of injury, or perhaps a bloodstain. But then he noticed the texture of the skin within those discolored areas: rough and withered, just as darkspawn flesh was. […]      Every part of his skin that wasn’t covered by the greyed cloth bandages was corrupted. It was like a network of black mold working its way across his entire body, and everywhere it touched he could feel a hot buzzing underneath the flesh. It was difficult to look at.
—Dragon Age: The Calling, chapter 6
     The Architect stared into Utha’s eyes and nothing happened at first. Then black veins began to appear along her hand where the darkspawn touched her. They became darker and darker, the veins branching until her entire hand was criss-crossed with them. […]      Her flesh withered and curled, the air filling with the foul stench of decay. […]      The stain on her skin spread, crawling up her neck and covering her face. Her coppery hair began to grey, and then it became white. Her long braid twisted and curled behind her, like a match that was burning itself into a cinder. Her eyes shot open, blood red, and she opened her mouth in a soundless scream... and what wisps remained of her hair simply fell out.      And then it was done.
—Dragon Age: The Calling, chapter 16
Bonus entry that made me go "hey what the fuck"
     What I remember most is its tongue flapping against a row of spiky teeth. I'd heard emissaries possessed the ability to speak, but the words were unnatural. They twisted and lurched as they left the creature's mouth, accompanied with a spray of saliva.      "Have you ever experienced living flesh ground between your teeth?" it asked Mila before biting through her throat.
—[DAI: The Descent] Codex Entry: Darkspawn Emissary
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