#we love going a few times a year
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I have never been more concerned for a JP update from your art than I am seeing a Cheka knowing the context of Leona’s dream.
My bois ok right?????? My sweet nephews ok right??????
well
uhhhh
I'm sure the real one is fine :)
#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 11 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 11 spoilers#unfortunately leona's ultimate happy dream did involve his entire family dying tragically. them's the breaks.#(for the record he is a little messed up about this) (he is a little messed up about a lot of stuff)#the context of cheka is that they were going to try to shock leona awake by having him show up#however while styx could provide them with a 3d model based on a bodyscan (which they had for...reasons??) they had no data on his behavior#so he was basically just a little frozen mannequin#(the sprite was not t-posing but in my heart this was happening)#ruggie could kind of pilot him with his magic but it only lasts for a few seconds so he had to keep recasting it with noticeable choppiness#so while we don't get the entire effect due to the limitations of the format#this means that leona was in the middle of let-them-eat-cake'ing a revolution when suddenly#his late nephew bursts jerkily in through the door yelling OJITAN I'M ALIVE AND MY VOICE CHANGED OFFSCREEN#honestly they spent more time thinking of how to explain ruggie's terrible impression of cheka than anything else#how could leona have seen through this brilliant plan so quickly 🤔#man i really did love his horrible dream though#i like him as a character but i wasn't expecting his dream to be the one that got to me like that#love how all the savana dreams were like#jack: what if leona was really cool and my friend :)#ruggie: what if my dad came back and leona created a socialist utopia for me :)#leona: what if i finally got the chance to prove myself except i screwed everything up and everyone hated me and my family was dead#his conversation with kifaji at the end 😭#kifaji in his dream in GENERAL acting as a counterpoint to his phantom like. like!!!! (waves hands)#i just. these guys.#me 4+ years ago: this game looks so dumb i gotta try it. surely i won't become emotionally overinvested in any of this.
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Every day I’m haunted by the fact the boys happily swim in sewer water
Even if it’s filtered somehow there’s no way it’s not still nasty 😭 Bet they can defeat any of their villains just by accidentally giving them diseases I swear
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#bless their hearts but they’re nasty#it’s funny because like#each and every one of them has moments#where they’re a typical disgusting teenage boy#and then the next they have STANDARDS#can’t blame Leo for being so determined to go to a spa#even if he nearly licked his own foot that’s prob cleaner than anything else the boys have been up to in years 💀#thank you shelldon for all your hard work cleaning after then 🙏#they’re all gross teenage boys!!!#even Donnie he is NO exception here#bro was DRINKING A BEVERAGE while wading through sewer water he is just as gross as his bros#bro also talks with his mouth full he is no more refined than his equally gross bros fr and I love it#but yeah no way that water isn’t disgusting even filtering it would still leave grime on the walls of the sewer for yearsss#pros of them moving into an abandoned subway system is fixing their sense of smell enough to not be as gross#100% that’s part of why they didn’t mind being so filthy pre shelldon#because I mean they were literally raised in the sewers and they’re teenage boys like that’s a double whammy#THEY ALSO DONT WEAR SHOES#the few times any of them do the shoes are discarded before heading home 💀#I love them tho they are endearing anyhow#April’s immune system must be godlike just being around them fr#honestly no joke Mikey’s probably the cleanest of them all#just by virtue of being a chef#Leo I see as a mixture since he no doubt loves to pamper himself so he’s clean like#a percentage of time before he goes out and ruins his own hard work#Donnie is similar in that he’s just VERY SELECTIVE about what he thinks is too gross#Raph may be more on the stinky end but it’s not his fault he has his stinks and eats things of dubious origin(esp since his bros ate poison)#Donnie and Leo really have the gall to be sick about Raph eating the origami salami but they have no room to talk#all their villains are prob like please stay away from us we have salmonella now
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DUN-DUH-DUH-DUUUUHN!
suprise! i've been working as part of ANOTHER Bang! I paired up once again with the delightful @englandamericaitaly to create this piece for their fic as part of the @dpxdcbigbang !
you can read their fic here- a really fun read, and of course I drew the scene with my boy Duke. we gotta step up folks! not enough art of this weird little daylight-loving freak out here!
Image ID:
A drawing of a very dark train tunnel, with a rail track stretching down from the top towards the bottom of the image. At the top of the piece near the back of the tunnel is Duke Thomas in his Signal armour, giving off a strong yellow glow as he is crouched over Clayface, arm raised in a fist to punch him as his head is raised to look up with glowing eyes. Clayface's hand is wrapped around Duke trying to pull him off. At the bottom of the page near the front of the tracks, Jazz Fenton stands facing Duke with a faint green glow. Three shadowy figures stand behind her. In the top right corner there is a close-up panel of Jazz's eyes, in all green, and mirroring it in the bottom left are Duke's eyes in all yellow.
#this was SO FUN to do even if the perspective intimidated me a bit more than a bit#[narrator voice]: and who was to blame for that?#(me. it was me once again)#but yeah guys dont mind me signing up for so many events when its term time. im fine#im fine its all fine! what do you mean im on fire#no im not burnt out we had a messy breakup a few years ago and now i avoid her like a plague#but pls go check out andi's fic! really loved working with them again#love you andi mwah mwah mwah#as for YOU... i'm coming for you next. as soon as i finish [redacted].#(you know who you are)#dc x dp#dc x danny phantom#danny phantom#dc comics#batfam#duke thomas#jazz fenton#the signal#signal dc#my scribbles
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Little bright colored outfit with a fun vest ~
(shoes from ebay like 10 years ago. everything else is thrifted)
#ootd#jfashion#fashion#fantasy fashion#mori kei#....like... adjacent... lol#no idea what style this would be lol.. makes me think of like whimsical vaguely fantasy themed childrens book character#finally posting one of my aforementioned seven million drafts of actual outfits and costumes i have finished and edited#the photos for but just never feel like posting lol..#I need to find one of those people whos like 'omg i am ADDICTED to social media ugh i wish i could get off of it#im just browsing and posting like 60 times a daaaaay!!!' and take a little magical bottle and suck some of the social media#enthusiasim out of them. for moi. In exchange they can have some of my 'literally just never in the mood to post or interact with the#outside world ever' energy. We can balance each other. huzzah and so on#Though I think maybe it's part of the general thing I've heard of like.. I can't remember if it was in reference to adhd or just some sort#of general execcutive functioning issue type of thing - but the idea that things have to be ''just right'' before you do something. like#'oh i need to do this task. but i have to wait until XYZ first' or 'oh i can do this but only if X specific condition is met' or etc#The fact that I even have to be in a Specific Mindset to post. or sometimes will delay posting on social media because like 'oh well#I'm going somewhere tomorrow. somehow this matters. i cannot spend 5 minuts posting TONIGHT. clearly it will interfere#somehow schedule wise with the doctor appointment i have 15 hours from now. yes. yes. i must wait until my appointment is over#tomorrow afternoon. THEN i shall post' or etc. etc. lol. NOT even taking into account the many days#I just genuinely and physically sick and it's not even a mental thing. I just physically dont feel like sitting at the computer lol..#ANYWAY.. trying to get back into it. trying to get a business bank account.. make a proper paypal so i can start selling sculptures again.#selling clothes and sculptures.. posting about such things then of course as one must. etc... chanting to hype up and motivate myself lol#But yes. this is my favorite outfit out of the bunch so I am posting it first I guess.. maybe others later..#Also the purple dress says its from shein. which I've heard is bad fast fashion stuff. but maybe okay since its second hand? I havent#been to the bins since like 2020 or late 2019 even. and I think stuff like shein and temu has only become poular in the past few years#but I bet if I went to the bins now I might would find a good handfull of that stuff. Probably now not much different than what you#find in a walmart or a forever 21 or actual physical stores you can go to though. I hear quality of clothing is down everywhere no matter#where you get it or whatnot. What bountiful joys unfettered capitalism and exploitation bestows upon us (<being sarcastic).#Wearing one of my favorite little vests though. I love the texture of it and the clasps on it
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hello!!! i was able to get all my bills paid for this month without overdrafting my bank account, which is amazing 🥹 but my rent is coming up and due on the first, i only have $5 in my bank account but i need $750 to pay rent 😭😭😭 im working my ass off on comms in the coming weeks, if anyone is interested in getting one in the meantime im extremely open! $80 for a single character and $120 for two characters!
and if you cant afford that and just want to throw a few bucks at me that's much appreciated too!!! anything helps at all, anything will help me not be severely overdrafted before my next (very small) paycheck hits on the first of january!
im still on the job hunt and nothing has turned out so far unfortunately :( commissions are my main source of income for the time being since the job market is in shambles
pp: paypal.me/bewearrr
vnm: tobias_leviathan
0/750
#i know im not gonna be able to get my ENTIRE rent but if im able to get more than half of it i'd feel a lot safer than i do now#last month i had to Severely overdraft my bank account and i lost a whole $700 paycheck to it and i was fucked for the rest of the month#but i pulled myself out of THAT hole... i think i could do it again#comms have been going smoothly and ive been trying my best to finish them in a timely manner#i have a bunch from earlier this year as well as some YCH slots ive been banging out#its been nice doing art more frequently tbh ive been enjoying it#i have one im Almost finished with it took me so long bc there were 3 versions of the image but im finishing that today#and then onto the next one!!#my bf bought me tickets to a concert this past weekend so i was doing that and lost a few days of working time since we had to travel for it#but it was nice to get out of the house and attend an Event with someone i love dearly that was refreshing to my soul
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A Very Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays <3
#bnha#best jeanist#edgeshot#eclair’s art#miruko#ryukyu#uwabami#fatgum#mt lady#kamui woods#hakamada tsunagu#kamihara shinya#rumi usagiyama#ryuko tatsuma#taishiro toyomitsu#yu takeyama#shinji nishiya#edgejeanist#mirukyubami#mt kamui#merry christmas#hooo tags..#i know i am a few days late this time but this year has been a busy one#i havent really been drawing much but here we go#the teacher version is in the works now and hopefully will be done before new year#love ya
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V, JoeNicky & Nile
V. An abandoned or empty place.
When Joe pulls the sheet off the couch it kicks up enough dust that it makes Nile sneeze. The couch underneath is old, wooden frame rotting, fabric stained and full of holes where moths have eaten away at it.
“Sorry,” Joe says to Nile when she finally manages to get the sneezing under control. “Didn’t realise it was that bad.” He puts his hands on his hips and looks down at the couch. Nile looks it over.
“There’s no saving that,” she says, wiping at her eyes. She can heal from falling over ten stories, but she can’t get away from allergies.
Joe frowns. “I liked that couch.”
The house is older than anywhere else they’ve brought her, and has been abandoned for long enough that it’s falling apart. But through some trick of posing as their own sons, or something, Joe and Nicky still own it, even if there’s a giant hole in the roof and all the windows are broken. Why they’d decided to come back here, Nile doesn’t know, but it’s a nice enough area, and a good distraction from, well. Everything. Growing back a leg, she’s discovered, is not fun.
From one of the other rooms – she thinks it’s the kitchen, she’s not actually sure where Nicky had wandered to – there’s the sound of something breaking and crashing to the ground, and a muffled curse.
Joe makes a questioning noise in the vague direction of the kitchen. A few moments later, Nicky appears in the doorway, covered in dust. “I am okay,” he says. “But I think we will need to go out to eat tonight.”
“Nothing?”
Nicky shakes his head. “Unless you want to start a fire and go hunt some rabbits.”
Joe grins. “Just like old times, right?”
Nile shakes her head firmly, which makes Nicky smile. She loves them, but there’s no way they’re doing that.
“We can probably clear out enough space in here,” Joe says, gesturing to the floor. “Get the sleeping bags out of the car. Probably have to start a fire anyway, but…”
Nile looks around again while Joe says something to Nicky in Arabic that makes him laugh. The house is falling apart, sure, but it’s structurally stable, and the bones are all there. It could be something. They’ve got time to make it something.
Nicky is the one who goes for pizza in the end – he doesn’t trust Nile and Joe to order it if left to their own devices – while they try to clear out a space in the living room. Eventually, though, after Nile has another sneezing fit, Joe suggests they just take the sleeping bags outside instead, which works out a lot better. He sets about starting a fire with practiced ease while Nile sets out the sleeping bags around it. They’re far enough away from civilisation that she can’t hear cars passing by, which is kind of surreal, and the stars are brighter than she’s ever seen them.
When Nicky gets back, two boxes balanced on one arm and a bottle of wine in the other, he looks over their makeshift camp and laughs. “Just like old times, then?” he asks.
Joe grins. “Except we have pizza.”
“And actual sleeping bags,” Nile says.
“Ah, these modern inventions could never quite match the comfort of a pile of furs,” Joe says wistfully. Nile gives him a look. She’s ninety percent sure that one’s bullshit, but she can never quite tell with him.
Nicky sets down the pizza boxes, and jogs back to the car to grab the pack of plastic wine glasses they’d bought before they got here.
“We should’ve bought marshmallows,” Nile says. “Could have made s’mores.”
“Well, we’ll have to go to the hardware store tomorrow anyway,” Joe points out. “And I think it’ll be a little while before we can actually sleep in there.”
“Tomorrow, then?”
“Tomorrow,” Nicky agrees.
#neon answers#materassassino#neon writes#kaysanova#nile freeman#what's going on here? who knows. they're renovating an old safehouse in the middle of nowhere#why isnt andy there? off on a solo self discovery road trip she calls em sometimes#i like to think its a really old one and when they were deciding where to go joe was getting super nostalgic about it and talking about it#to nicky like habibi.... do you remember that little house we had a few years ago..... we should go back there.....#(local 900 year old man confused 'a few years' for like 150 and didn't realise until they got there)#(and promptly went hm. i think it may need some work)#(nile. who had been expecting an Actual Functional House. just has to sit there for a moment)#they're having fun though. she and joe are gonna have fun painting on the walls. etc#nicky doesn't trust them with pizza because nile (not picky) and joe (LOVES to annoy nicky) will deliberately order the worst looking optio#like. dominoes had a cheeseburger pizza. that's what they're going for#nicky let this happen two (2) times before just going for pizza himself#when andy's there it's even worse she will get margherita but she'll also 'add her own toppings'#like my parents who put chinese takeout on pizza. it's good i'm sorry i know i'm expecting to be banned from italy soon#ANYWAY#thank you for the prompt!! i had fun <3
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Just remembered all the money The Duffers threw away for 5 years on marketing Byler knowing damn well hardly anybody cared and not paying a cent for Milkvan content, merch, photoshoots, anything.
How could it be queerbaiting? They didn't even have to advertise them pre-season 4 but they said "no, we're gonna move money from our budget towards a 2017 photoshoot and AWAY from other important things on our budgeting list. Noah, tweet that they definitely aren't gay."
Like really just maximized story telling. We don't want you to know until we want you know but we're gonna subliminally open your mind to it. And somebody saw "they def aren't gay" and went "hm I'd never thought of them as gay before...honestly kinda good idea ngl".
For the Duffers to not make Byler happen would be inherently and exclusively malicious, a malice intended from the beginning. There weren't even enough people in 2017 to actually queerbait. Because there weren't enough to make money off of. The marketing tells us it was planned from long before people were on board. So either they planned to tell Mike and Will's love story or they planned to snub queer viewers for the sake of it, willing to make financial sacrifice to do so, both by investing in something people weren't buying and NOT INVESTING in something people WANTED TO BUY (milkvan content and merch) in order to convert people away from Milkvan and to Byler to also maximize the damage they were spending their money to create.
Lord have mercy if it's the second one because Jesus Fucking Christ usually showrunners hurt gay people to gain money, they don't usually PAY to hurt gay people because they just wanted to that bad.
Example of their weird anti-money marketing decisions
Other examples
#stranger things#byler#imagine sitting in a writers room in 2017 going#you know what we should do#with our budget integrity and reputation as writers#throw all 3 of them away#and this is a commitment we shall make for the next 9 years#and not go back on when we don't make money off of it the first few tries#and also not market the other ship in order to actively convert people before hurting them#maximize damage#byler marketing#not queerbait#byler proof#i trust the duffers#elmike marketing#<<< scroll through this tag#it's full of all the times they could have made money and didn't do SHIT#no team el/team will shirts#no team el acknowledged at all#just a love story between two boys and then they have a friend with superpowers but that isn't really pertinent why are you asking#oh yeah she breaks up with boys sometimes it's our favorite thing she does - their actual instagram one time
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Young odysseus convincing everyone Ithaca is nothing but a poor island with rocks and goats to avoid any raids/conquerors/so he doesn't get murdered for talking to Helen bc "it's not like he's a real choice"
Young odysseus falling in love with Penelope at the same event: wait. Wait shit I fucked up hold on just hear me out
#the odyssey#Odysseus#Penelope#Pre-canon(?)#odypen#Odypen meet ulgy#When the cute “bumpkin” boy wants to marry you but only brought 3 goats for your cousins gifts#AND you caught him spying on your family#There's like a single line in the odyssey where I think some god is narratoring (not 100% sure)#And they have a well actually interjection moment to explain how Ithaca isn't just one island it actually has a shit ton of land#And is technically richer then every other country#Which honestly just makes it funnier that odysseus was like welp time to beg again with zero issues for 10 years#But it will never not be funny to me that young odysseus really shot himself in the foot with Penelopes family for the start#Like clearly it worked out but I bet Penelope father HATES him#Listen odysseus showed up to Helen's courting for the drama ONLY he never planned on marrying her#Bc he knew her husband would be murdered immediately#My man showed up for the drama and stayed for Penelope#Otp#I love them#And need more of these two being rat bastards to each other and LOVING it#Listen neither one of them has let a single thing go in their whole life and they like that about the other#Odysseus going to buy anything for his wife ever#Penelope: Oh my can we afford that this is just a simple rock island with a few goats#Odysseus: dressed head to toe in very very rich cloth that his wife made#Ithaca with the fastest ships bc ody designed new ones#Penelope: literally dripping with jewels that were MAYBE stolen (shut up you can't prove anything and Penelope likes it when he's a bastard#Odysseus: you're so right my bad that was so irresponsible for getting you a gift. Perhaps your father would like to pay instead?
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//happy pride month to them
#//as far as im aware there are very few ships po.kemas makes blatantly obvious are more or less canon#//shoutout to the person that made this decision#//i cannot think of a more blatant way to say theyre going on a date than “we're having dinner and going to the hot springs tonight”#//also larry being more assertive bc he has Plans❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️ maybe thats why g.eeta told him to spend time w/kabu#//only mfer in 30 years thats made an actual genuine connection w/larry that made him Change. just a little bit. but change nonetheless.#//we love that for him#//im a little bit obsessed with them if you cant tell LMAO#//okay to rb//#out of character.
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there’s a universe where in academy x instead of what happened in canon it’s all the new x-men kids attempting to set up dani and rahne in increasingly cartoonish fashions while both women remain oblivious and confused
#they go to xuan like ‘how does being a lesbian. work.’ and xuan is like ‘uhhhh it just Does? …. why?’#‘we think dani is a lesbian.’ ‘and in love with the new TA!’#‘thank you very helpful. anyway we can’t deal with them making gooey eyes at each other any longer. it’s genuinely getting sad’#xuan: ‘oh my god. leave them be. trust me. we’ve been trying to set them up for years. they’re both deep in denial’#yeah so the new new mutants completely ignore her#and try to mastermind getting rahne and dani together a million times#honestly they probably end up roping in a few hellions too bc even they want them to get together#i just think it would be funny#new mutants v2#new mutants#danielle moonstar#moonclair#dani moonstar#rahne sinclair#dani x rahne#wolfsbane#new x men#x men comics
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Goddamn, MTMTE goes hard on the third readthrough
#mtmte#maccadams#first readthrough is for getting the overall gist of the story#still enjoyable but you spend a lot of time being confused and getting characters mixed up#even more so if you're not familiar with previous idw material#and even more than that if you're not familiar with g1 in general#second readthrough is for re-experiencing the story with the added context of knowing what tf is going on and who's who#much easier to keep track of all the little connections and intricacies#plus you have the added knowledge of where the plot's going so you can properly appreciate like. foreshadowing and stuff#there are some offhand remarks in the first few issues that made me have to physically stop and take a moment#once i realized what they were referring to#anyways#third readthrough is for appreciating all the little details#we already know the forest now it's time to appreciate these trees babey#yeah the main plot beats are great but some of these smaller moments go SO hard#and the craftsmanship of it all? the pacing the layout the Excellent use of page turns. So good for building suspense + getting that Impact#Anyways. fantastic experience. god i love comics#And of course this experience is greatly enhanced if you put several years between rereads#so you have a chance to forget about some of the plot twists until they're right in front of you#thus giving yourself the chance to re-experience those 'OH SHIT' moments#even if it's a bit earlier than you're supposed to
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my romantic self-esteem is just absolutely rock-solid. for whatever reason!
#I’m a catch!#and I’m so not interested in anybody who wouldn’t demonstrably make my life better in every way#and that involves not being afraid of me or the idea of romance/marriage in general#and if you are afraid it just isn’t interesting or attractive enough for me#there was a boy a few years ago and tbh I think he liked me#and I liked him! he was cute he was intense in an endearing way#and he was smart#we argued about Taylor and then the next time I saw him he was like Christmas tree farm is a good song#(it had just come out)#and he never did anything about it and then he moved away and that is totally fine#and I wish him well.#but the crush was killed by the simple fact that he never liked me enough to say it#like truly and with all (non-romantic) love; go with God#at that point lol#that said I have never wanted marriage or children as an abstract concept#so it makes it much easier to think along these lines#it would be so devastating to want it so badly and not get it!#but I can’t even imagine summoning the desire for it in an abstract sense#I’ll meet someone and love them and then that will lead to marriage and possibly children#or I won’t#but both roads look about the same to me in terms of desire#or any desire big enough worth mentioning#not talking about the whispers or the daydreams that do sometimes intrude#but yeah I don’t think full desire would come until there was a person#and there might not be! I cannot conjure them from the deeps lol#anyway I’ll stop talking about it because I know it can be sensitive/delicate to talk about#in a public setting
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actually...
looking at a bunch of my old favorite mutuals blogs that have been inactive for years. i miss them, even if i never really talked to any of them. when you're mutuals with a person for so long they become a comforting presence even without talking. you see them every day and read their posts about their thoughts or feelings or about what's going on in their life and so on. and they just become a part of your daily life in such a subtle way.
and then one day they just never post again. without warning. shit sucks. i actually hate it.
#i think about so many old mutuals like every day#just wondering where they've gone and what they're up to and how their lives have turned out#i love them and miss them so much#actually there have been a couple times when old mutuals suddenly become active again after years#but i can't count on that -- most don't#i wish there was some website or app or whatever#that would make it possible to stay in contact indefinitely#like i just imagine something like linktree or whatever#but also something more#just this one central hub with one username and it is just saved forever#and so any person who remembers your name can just look it up and suddenly have access to all these ways to contact you#because i've had my blog deleted a few times and like i gotta slightly change my url every time#so if someone looks up my og blog url they won't be able to find me#and that shit makes me sad#just a slight change in url could mean the difference between staying in contact#whatever#i get like this occasionally#nostalgic and sad because i miss old mutuals#scrolling their long abandoned blogs#idk why i do this to myself lmao#i do it with facebook sometimes too#i haven't posted since like high school#and sometimes i go back and see all my friends' profiles frozen in time#because a lot of their profiles are also inactive for whatever reason#i don't know why this shit makes me so sad#so yeah if you're a mutual -- even we don't talk -- don't ever just randomly delete or become inactive#even if we don't talk you can give me your other socials or whatever#or even an email idc#i just don't want to lose connection with any of you -- when i'm 80 years old i wanna reminisce with y'all#and i wanna throw everyone a feast someday
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so as I'm sure y'all remember, I went insane when I found the montage of unreleased footage from the Gladiator DVD. I'm planning to do a full breakdown of all the new footage I discovered in there, but I just couldn't wait to share these because they are SO INTERESTING to me. it's like a four second clip of Maximus in his tent in Germania, featuring him doing something where he's shuffling some nutshells around
is he not just the cutest thing <3
but like??? I am so curious about what he's doing!!! it's probably a strategy technique, like him using the nutshells to represent different sections of his army and planning their attack. if not, maybe it's some kind of Roman version of solitaire?? I mean he's been on the road for years at this point, and how adorable would it be if this is his little nighttime unraveling technique, like a crossword puzzle or smth??
idk I just was awestruck by this little moment and wanted to share :)
#look at my precious husband#his sweet face his sweet adorable precious face!!!!!#i'm obsessed with the concentrated expression with the tiniest hint of amusement#i have to think this takes place after the battle of germania#since he's not in his tent until afterward#unless?? this was an alternate opening / intro to maximus???#maybe we were originally going to meet the general while he's scheming the attack in his tent???#i don't even care#i'm just SO INSANELY EXCITED TO HAVE A TINY SCRAP OF NEW FOOTAGE OF MY BELOVED#it's a 25 year old movie and i thought i had seen every crumb of maximus content in existence#and then HERE HE IS#there are quite a few extra shots that i will share very soon#i just couldn't resist showing these first hehe#imagine playing a little strategy game with him before bed#all cozy in your shared tent just enjoying spending time together#imagine how precious it would be <3#he's so soft here#so sweet and cozy and intent#i NEED HIM#i love him SO MUCH#gladiator#maximus#maximus decimus meridius#gladiator 2000#russell crowe#low quality screencaps of a high quality man
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i think the adult relationship to the childhood dog is something that is so tender and heart-wrenching and important. you are the last vestige of my childhood. you are the sacred keeper of the memories i hold dearest, but you can barely see or hear me anymore. who do i become once you’re gone? where do i turn to remember myself? you’re the last one sitting next to me at the door of a childhood home that no longer exists, waiting patiently for the return of a family that no longer exists. where can i live when you, too, no longer exist? i can’t let go. please don’t make me let go. i know you’ll leave soon. i wish you didn’t have to. but she’s just a dog. her life is short and i will witness her death and i’ve known this from the beginning. i didn’t think it would come so fast. am i ready? have i become someone yet? have i become unrecognizable to her yet? does she still see the child i was? i’m still the child i was. please, don’t forget the child i was. please don’t take her away from me.
#i wrote this and put it in my drafts a few months ago#and now my childhood dog just died and im a complete fucking mess and i keep coming back to this#she was my baby#i got her as a birthday present from my parents#only a couple months before everything fell apart#i didnt know what was going on at home was abuse or that things were bad or that thwy would change#i just knew that my parents got me a puppy so i must be the luckiest girl in the world#and she was with us through all of it#and she knew our pain too#he was the one who wanted to put her in a shock collar#we all cried and begged him not to#she was just as traumatized by him as the rest of us#she was the last thread tying me to a time before i understood how bad things were#i don’t know who to be now#im sorry this is sooooo dramatic#i just loved my puppy#but she was 14 years old and we knew it was coming#i just hoped we’d have her for christmas
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