#we didnt know any of them that well and they ignored us the entire time as did the one mutual friend that invited us

[emotargaryen]

we have stuff to make margaritas oh we're kinda back

[miya-rin]

“what the fuck do you two think youre doing?”

shit, you think, you didnt notice the balcony door had been slid open until you heard the voice of one of your brothers. you start to pull away from suna’s lips which earns you a small whine from his end, his grip tightens around you and honestly it its quite cute the way he is trying so hard to savour the moment. “come back later, we’re kinda busy.” the boy mutters before trying to move your face away from the distraction so that he can kiss you once more.

“suna you get your hands off of her right now, i dont give a fuck that its your birthday.” osamu pipes up, he looks furious and a little bit disgusted, if it hadnt been for the situation youre in right now you would think its kind of funny.

“samu lay off him, it was a mutual agreement, im just as guilty as he is ok?” that does not seem to help the boys understand, if anything they seem even more angry with you both.

“what the fuck do you mean it was a mutual agreement? are you two hooking up or something? yn he just turned 18 a few hours ago are you forgetting that?” atsumu says, he is rambling on with every excuse he can think of as to why this is “so wrong”, from the corner of your eye you can see suna trying so very hard to hide the grin that is creeping its way onto his face, his hands still all over you despite the fact that you arent alone anymore.

“listen, it was his birthday wish ok? i swear it didn’t mean anything,” sunas grip begins to loosen ever so slightly, “i just though it would get him off my back and get him over his little crush on me.” suna’s facial expression shifts but you choose to ignore it, you have bigger problems to deal with at the moment.

“no this is not ok, how would you feel if me or samu kissed one of your friends because it was their birthday wish?”

“that’s different, why would my friends want to kiss either of you?”

“excuse me? ill have you know that many women want to kiss me! and dont think youre getting off the hook either suna, ill make sure you never-“ you dont even want to hear the threat that is about to come out of his mouth, you just want to get out of this shitty situation.

“boys please, just give us five minutes to talk and then we will be back inside ok? i promise.” your efforts to plead with your brothers finally work.

“…fine,” atsumu mumbles, “but this better be a one time thing. im not gonna deal with you two being all lovey dovey around me.” and with that he lightly tugs on osamu’s sleeve, signalling him to walk back inside and continue the party. he closes the balcony door but not before bringing two fingers up to his eyes and then pointing them at the two of you. its a warning.

you turn back to suna and notice the sad look on his face - he looks kinda cute like this, “so, what do-“.

“did you really mean what you just said to them?” the poor boy looks heartbroken, after waiting three years to finally have a chance with the girl he loves wants the moment is ruined like that? “did you actually just do that so i would leave you alone?” his hands fully leave your body now and he takes a step back to put some distance between you two.

“well i mean sort of yeah… ive never looked at you in any way other than my brothers best friend if im going to be honest, i dont know if thats because of the age difference or what but ive never thought we could be anything.” the look of hurt is prominent on his face no matter how hard he tries to hide it, normally playful banter would have been thrown back and forth between the two of you but rintarou just stays silent, an indication that youve fucked up.

“listen suna i dont know what you want me to say, i wasnt really thinking when i said that to atsumu it just came out. i am 4 years older than you and many people would not approve of us if i decided to give you a chance.”

“who cares? i could treat you so right if you would just let me. i have waited entirely too long for this moment, all im asking for is one date.”

“you said that about the kiss too, one thing is never enough with you is it? you always need more.” a playful smile creeps onto your face which is outshined by the one on sunas, he knows that your smile means that you agree to go on a date with him.

“i really hope you arent fucking with me right now, that would be so cruel, especially on my birthday.”

“oh give the birthday excuse a rest now will you? you dont need to keep on at me you have already got what you want.”

“mhm i absolutely have,” he walks closer and once again wraps his arms around you, placing a hand under your jawbone to make you look up at him, “and i couldnt be happier.” he states as he pulls you in for a passionate kiss once more <3

[ghastigiggles]

danse macabre

so uh. uhm. hi. i kept forgetting to post this and i feel really bad about it. i'm so sorry tadc nation here's some food for you

npc oc because i didnt feel comfortable writing anyone as a ler - not yet, anyway. but pomni needed to get wrecked so bad. she's so cute. i get cuteness aggression every time she's on screen

usual disclaimer; sfw tickling fic, very soft and fluffy, even a little goofy and silly.

"Given that our last adventure took an exciting turn, I thought doing a rerun would be a better idea today!"

A rippling groan passed through the veteran players that Caine seemed to entirely ignore, turning his attention to Pomni with an exaggerated movement.

"Something a little more calm, I'd say! Should help bring you down from any thoughts of the Void from the other day!"

"Ahh… I don't –"

"You'll love it," He interrupted, swooping back into the air with an extravagant gesture; "It's a fan favourite! Everyone knows it, everyone loves it, it's… 'Where in the World is Sir Wigglesburg?'!"

Pomni, of course, didn't miss the way everyone else in the room tensed up – though she didn't catch the way Gangle actually perked instead, immediately shooting sideways glances at everyone else before poorly mirroring their tension. 

"... You're kiddin'," Jax muttered, his eyes narrowing in annoyance. Caine simply continued as though he didn't hear the rabbit while Bubble floated nearby with an empty look in her eyes.

"Sir Wigglesburg is one of our most esteemed citizens –"

"Not an actual player," Ragatha helpfully cut in with a glance to Pomni, trying to give her context.

" – with a terrible habit of wandering off! His dear wife has, once again, asked us – rather, you – to lend a helping hand and bring him home safe! The first to lead Sir Wigglesburg back to the stage shall win a prize! (To be determined, prize may or may not meet or exceed expectations.) Good luck!"

And, with no further context or instruction, their ringmaster and his companion entirely disappeared. There was a brief silence before Zooble grunted, already walking away.

"... Right. I'm going back to my room, then."

"Aww, somebody too chicken to help the poor guy?"

Jax sneered in their direction, and they shot him a searing glare; "Well, if you want a repeat of last time, be my guest. I don't."

"I will also take my leave," Kinger muttered in a hurried fashion, looking askance; "The last time we did this, it was before… Mngh…"

Ragatha offered him a sympathetic smile, nodding as the other two softened just slightly. 

"It's alright, Kinger. We understand."

"Thank you… If you do take on the quest, give Sir my best." 

With that, both Zooble and Kinger headed towards the living quarters, leaving Pomni to finally pipe up again, looking between Ragatha and Jax.

"... So, um… W-what's so upsetting about the rerun, anyway? Is it, um, bad…?"

"Oh – no, not – not per se," The ragdoll replied quickly, tapping her chin; "I mean, Caine wasn't lying… This is one of the calmer adventures."

"Yeah. You should do it, newbie."

Both sets of eyes snapped to Jax, who simply grinned passively. Ragatha squinted.

"... And I don't suppose you'd be coming along?"

"I will, actually. Could be funny. What about you, Rags?"

Though she grimaced, Ragatha sighed in resignation, turning a little to give Pomni a small smile.

"Well, I'm not gonna let her go it alone… Again."

That much, at least, gave Pomni heart, and she almost smiled back – until she realized one of their party wasn't accounted for, and her brow furrowed.

"Uh… Where's Gangle?"

The other two also seemed to only just notice Gangle's absence, and the three of them glanced around briefly before their search was cut short by a distant shriek from the player in question.

"That sounded like her…!"

"Is she getting hurt?! W-what if someone else abstracted?!" Pomni shot them a panicked glance; "Sh-should we –"

"Let's go investigate before anything else," Jax interrupted calmly, barely keeping the amusement from his face as he gestured for Pomni to take the lead. When Ragatha shot him a glare, he simply shrugged, following after her with the ragdoll shortly behind.

They had little more than a vague direction, down a corridor and two left turns that seemed to dim the further along they went; Gangle made no further sounds, giving them little in the way of direction, and eventually Pomni sighed haplessly, squinting into the darkness.

"... It's no use… Should – should we go find Caine again…?"

She was met with silence, and turned around – only to find Ragatha and Jax were nowhere to be seen, and her stomach dropped with dread.

"... Guys…?"

"Ooh? Who is this…? A face I've yet to see and greet?"

At a new voice, Pomni yelped, whipping around – and coming face-to-face with what appeared to be some kind of massive, cartoonish caterpillar. His body appeared to be covered in green fur, disappearing into the darkness past his neck – or so Pomni assumed at first glance, anyway. His face and what could only be described as underbelly were covered in white fur that parted around his features, such as a long purple nose and big black eyes – one of which sported a golden monocle. And, of course, his hands had the same cartoon glove sort of thing that Kinger had going on, though this time with black noodle arms seemingly attached.

In her shock, she entirely lost her voice, merely stammering wordlessly – and earning a chuckle from the caterpillar looming over her. 

"Such a small thing, you are! 'Tis a pleasure, indeed!" 

Smiling, he extended one of his hands for a shake, a gesture that finally managed to pull Pomni from her stupor.

"I am Sir Wigglesburg! And you, my gentile jester, would be…?"

"A-ahhh…" Though hesitant, she extended her own hand, despite it being barely half the size of his own, "P-Pomni – woah –!"

The moment their palms yet, Wigglesburg pulled her closer, twirling her around so suddenly that her eyes spun in alternating directions – and as she was steadied again, pulled along by his sudden movements, she was abruptly made aware of his overwhelming amount of hands, with a second dominant one taking her free hand to hold her steady while two more settled on her back and hip, respectively.

"Pomni, Pomni! A wondrously adorable and charming name! Please, indulge me with a dance – 'tis a formal greeting between my people!"

"I – I'm actually – ah!"

The hand on her hip pinched her side unexpectedly, making her jerk in an attempt to escape – yet Wigglesburg easily moved with her reflexive maneuver like it was a step in her dance.  

"I'm actually – ehh! – l-looking for s – hey! – some – sohome –"

The hand squeezed again, and again, and again; and every time, she tried to sidestep or wiggle away – and every time, it just encouraged their "dance", with Wigglesburg's gentle but firm grip keeping her upright despite the giggles bubbling in her chest and the involuntary smile that had been pulling at her lips. 

"My dear Pomni," Wigglesburg crooned as though she wasn't struggling to articulate a sentence; "You are a wonderful dancer!"

" – Ghhh, thank you…? But I – ah!! – would you plehease –"

She squeaked again as she was suddenly pulled into a dip, very nearly panicking before she realized Wigglesburg was still supporting her gently. His wide smile was kind and sweet, but undercut by the mischief in his eyes as he looked down at her.

"... That said, you are giggling quite a lot! I didn't think dancing with a wyrm would be that much fun for you!"

"I-It's not the dancing – GyaAH –"

"Is it not?" 

Pomni couldn't manage a reply, stuck in a fit of uncontrollable giggles caused by the fingers wiggling at both sides, forcing her to squirm back and forth with no true escape from the unexpected and overwhelming sensation. Wigglesburg hummed, tilting his head with an adoring expression.

"I say, I was under the impression that it was the jester who caused nobles to laugh, not the other way around! Yet, here you are, practically beside yourself…"

For a mercy, he did release her hands, and she immediately brought her arms in – not that they did much, proportionately, to protect her. 

"Aheheh, I can't – I cahahan't –"

"Oh, my poor dear, does it tickle? Are we feeling a little sensitive?"

She hiccuped through her laughter at that, shaking her head and ducking down; it felt like the teasing sent a shot through her nerves, which only made it worse when he started scratching experimentally at her ribs, prompting a few snorts to escape her as well.

"Ngh – nahahaa, not th - thehehere…!"

"What? Here? Or here – oh, dear me."

His hands shot to Pomni's underarms for just a few seconds, but it was enough to prompt a shriek from her, wriggling and kicking fruitlessly with even more vigour than before.

"NnnoOHOHO – gh – $%^@# – I cahAAHAAN'T –!"

"Yes, I can see that! 'Twould seem that 'tis an especially sensitive spot."

"Plhehe – PLEHEEHEEHEASE!"

She threw back her head with a loud cackle as Wigglesburg doubled down, every stroke of his fingers sending shocks down her arms and through her body – but she only had to endure it a moment longer before he finally laid off, lightly massaging her sides with his thumbs as she gasped for breath – an act that was more instinctual than actually necessary, given that breathing wasn't really a thing anymore – with a goofy, natural smile still stuck on her face.

"I do hope you can forgive my zeal in tormenting you," Wigglesburg offered after a moment, smiling apologetically; "I cannot help myself around the players."

"I – it's… Haah…" With a final breath, Pomni shook out the residual giggles, looking back up at Wigglesburg; "It's alright…"

"Oh, I figured! You never once asked me to stop, after all."

She stiffened at that, her eyes widening as she searched her memory – because, surely not… And yet, he was right.

She had no idea if the digital avatar could blush, but with how hot her face felt upon that realization, she really, really hoped it couldn't.

"But enough of that – you were searching for someone, yes?"

"Uh! Um. Y-yeah. You, actually, but also – Gangle, if you've seen her…"

"Oh! My dear Gangle has been here all along!"

Pomni blinked dumbly, and Wigglesburg chuckled, curling in on himself and cradling her close as his spine arched up to where she could see clearly – and, sure enough, Gangle was splayed out in the wyrm's green fur, seeming a little sleepy and out of it… Yet, content, even as she looked up and waved at Pomni.

"But… Her scream…"

"'Twas a scream of joy and laughter," Wigglesburg assured her; "Gangle is one of my favorite dancing partners – and I, hers! I admit, I went overboard this time, though… It has been too long since the last time."

"Oh."

A lot of things made sense, now. The way everyone had seemed tense and awkward when Wigglesburg's name came up; Gangle's quiet disappearance in the wake of the adventure's start. The little comments everyone was making towards each other… 

"Pomni! Are you alright?!"

Ragatha's voice pulled Pomni from her thoughts, and she looked down to see the ragdoll standing below, looking up with faint relief… And heavy amusement. Shortly behind her stood Jax, smug as ever – yet, notably, keeping a good generous distance between himself and the wyrm.

"Uh. Yeah," Pomni replied; "I found Gangle? And… And Sir Wigglesburg."

"We know. We heard you," Jax chuckled, easily side-stepping to avoid a tiny kick from Ragatha. For her part, the doll smiled.

"That's great! Let's head back to the stage and wrap up this adventure, then!"

Sir Wigglesburg, however, pouted a little, looking down at her.

"Oh, are you sure I can't convince you to share just one dance with me…?"

"Ahh… Maybe next time?"

Ragatha offered him a nervous smile, and Wigglesburg sighed dramatically – but he didn't object, simply setting Pomni on his back near Gangle before he began to crawl along on the path back to the stage. Distantly, Jax grumbled about not being offered a ride as he and Ragatha followed on foot.

In the softness of his fur, Pomni felt a tempting urge to "nod off", partially encouraged by the dance she'd just been through – but Gangle's voice, just barely loud enough to be heard – kept her in the waking world.

"... I'm glad you like his game. I've been the only one for awhile… Knowing someone else likes it makes me feel less weird."

And, with a small nod in response, Pomni hid her smile in the wyrm's fur.

Maybe not every part of the digital circus was terrible or terrifying.

[d4rkpluto]

i've returned to post about a particular subject i've been fighting to or not to post, because i used to consider this person the closest person in my life and i even considered her as a best friend and a sister.

and we have fallen out and apologised to each other many times, but perhaps whenever we argued it was life telling me that she is not supposed to be in my circle. and you could be wondering why am i bringing this up and telling tumblr this but im telling tumblr this to be aware of @couerardent and her scamming behaviour.

couerardent also known as MYSTIICWINTER OR MYSTICWIINTER.

talk about WORSE SERVICE I HAVE EVER GOTTEN MY ENTIRE LIFE.

[other people have come to me and spoke about how bad her services were, but i tried to overlook it because i really cared for her, lessoned learn]

i have always been empathetic towards ardent and her money situation, but there are moments when excuses turn into reasons to not do something. on august, i sent alex money because she needed it, but she also said in return she will give me 4 packs she usually gives her clients and she told me she would give me my money back.

first pack is "tell me your story."

second and other packs she hadnt told me what they were but she informed me that i'll be receiving them weekly since august, and now its november.

at first i was empathetic, since i used to be close to ardent, i knew she went through a lot of stuff at home, so i was patient. until august turned into september, and september turned into october and then october turned into novemeber.

and slowly i became annoyed, [as i should] because her services arent even long or good, as someone who gives chart readings to other people that consists more than fourteen pages, the effort to write that would take long, but ardent doesnt even give five pages for her services, three at most, so why is it taking her so long?

previously, she has joked to me about scamming other people, but would put the blame on them and not want to take accountability until they start using threats to expose her, i think she deleted the making fun of scamming them but here is some of it:

and when i would message her for updates about my reading because it'll take months, she would ignore me and even change her pfp on tumblr or discord, until i reach out to her on more platforms to get her attention.

and what would annoy me even more is that she would talk about how she never has something to do or would focus on other stuff knowing she needs to get my reading done lmao and this would be like 1-2 months after i was supposed to receive any of it lol.

worrying about the layout for almost 3 months PLEASE.

i have received 1/4 readings, and that was now almost 2-3 weeks ago, we should've been on my 2nd or 3rd reading by now, the only reason i have received 1 reading is because i did threaten to expose her if she didnt send the money or reading my way, because even i had some issues because living in london has gotten really difficult and i have been trying to support my family as much as i can, but im doing better right now.

its all about the principle. and she has none of that. and even attempted to victimise herself and behave like she was in distress whenever she got called out about her behaviour.

she lost track of time, the time being 3-4 months lol.

and when i was speaking to her she ignored me for a bit again ha, it was almost comedic. for almost two weeks she didnt try and check what i was speaking about.

she has gotten ill, but this was still months after.

and i have remembered, she has used much of her earned money to fund for her nose job but also uni, but during the moments it was best to pay me back was at the job she said paid her well, she informed me that when she gets paid by her job she'll pay me back, and she never did and ended up quitting the job.

[the unfairness i was speaking about is how uni her country dont do student finances, she's from romania, because they do in the uk it was just a surprise].

i asked her recently on how i was supposed to receive a reading but she didnt reply but change her pfp on whatsapp and discord, again.

if there is any confused people comment please because i did this half asleep lmao

[connorsblog]

˙✧˖° YOU'LL BE OKAY 📷 ༘ ⋆｡ ˚

a/n: im currently still working on the spencer fic but i need to rewatch the last half of season 12 to refresh my memory! until then enjoy this :) (also ignore how my format will change a bit here and there, im experimenting with it!)

pairing: rosita espinosa x reader + maggie rhee x reader if you squint !!

warnings: dont read if you havent reached 11x24! spoiler warning. but basic twd gore warning, cussing, character death, etc

loosely inspired by lil jeep by lil peep (specifically the "i'm dyin', i dont think that my bitch know" part)

——————————————————————————

me, eugene, gabriel, and rosita finally made it home. it had been one hell of a day — fighting off walkers and the mental strain for rosita of almost losing her kid.

all of us had huddled in the apartment, judith's shoulder in a sling. she'll be fine, though. she's one hell of a damn fighter.

my eyes caught rosita whispering to gabriel about something. he looked crushed — and that didn't occur very often anymore, especially after he hardened over the years.

i decided after a few moments to head over there myself. to my surprise, they didn't stop talking as i made my way over there.

rosita just looked... upset. but light, as well. her face was calm but if you looked deep enough — you'd see her thoughts churning behind her eyes like the rough, dark sea.

"hey," she finally pulled her face away from gabriels ear, his face lightening up but you could see it behind his eyes — something went wrong.

"what's goin' on?" i got straight to the point. i didn't want to twiddle my damn thumbs while something may be happening.

"uh," she pressed her lips together as she began, her demeanor seemed to shake.

she leaned towards me — her scent as intoxicating as it always has been. her soft tone reached my ears, the words slipping my mind until she pulled away.

"you're bit?" i whispered, and my heart seemed to jumpstart itself, pounding annoyingly against my ribcage.

"you'll be okay, you know?" she whispered, her voice cracking so subtly i almost didnt notice it.

"i won't, ro. you know that." this time my voice cracked, tears threatening to spill like the overflowing, hot magma of a volcano — it was hard to hold them back.

she stayed silent this time, moving her hand towards mine. her grey sweater cuff brushed against my skin, tickling me so much i would've laughed if it had been any other day.

i breathed in heavily, my chest expanding so much i thought my heart'd explode any second. it was still pounding unrelentlessly against my ribs, taking my breath away as it did so.

"i love you, ro." i swallowed thickly, pressing her soft hand against my face as my tears threatened to burst once again.

"i love you," she whispered like it was a forbidden phrase, something i'd never not grin about. no matter the day.

like i had predicted — my lips stretched into a small smile, the skin cracking painfully. i didn't wince, though, i had just avoided thinking about any other pain.

after a few minutes of tricking my brain, everything except rosita's presence was a simple background lull, like an old fridge motor, no matter how annoying it got you'd get used to it whether you desired it or not.

the other's chatter had died down slowly, everyone beginning to get tired from the day we all had. judith and daryl looked the most drained, second to connie, magna, and yumiko.

wait, where the hell was luke?

i hadn't known him entirely well, but he made judith laugh. as well as michonne, which had always been difficult to do especially after rick.

rosita's thumb rubbing against my hand snapped my attention back to her, her dark eyes staring at me insistently.

"yeah?" i mumbled, wondering if she had anything else to add to the pile of shit from today.

"nothin' was just wondering where you went," she leaned her chin on my shoulder, her scent filling my nostrils with such strong warmth. i felt safe with her, like always. there was never a moment where i hadn't felt safe around her presence.

"jus' thinking," i wanted to urge her to come closer into my arms, i wanted her beating heart against mine until it couldnt beat any longer. i wanted her against me until i couldn't think of anything else except her.

——————————————————————————

after about an hour of me and rosita just talking, her head seemed to become a bit limp. she was dying, but i didn't want to believe that. my brain worked on a way to convince itself she'll just be gone, but not dead. it worked like cogs in a machine but nothing worked.

me and maggie had decided to get her into the bed, watching her chest rise and fall much easier now that she didn't have to hold her body up.

i sat in a plush chair next to the bed, my legs dangling off the arm as i tried to get comfortable. i couldn't, though, my body failing to feel any comfort unless i was in rositas arms, inhaling her sweet scent.

"love, you okay?" rosita asked as if she wasnt laying down, fighting for each breath she took, her lungs burning every minute.

"yeah, sorry. jus' can't get comfortable." i mumble, embarrassment tickling my cheeks as they turned bright red.

"come here," she offered, her hand outstretched for me to grab. i crawled in bed with her, my body fitting into hers like we were pieces of the same puzzle.

"any better?" she asked, pressing a weak kiss to my head.

"yes," i smiled softly against her shoulder blade, somehow forgetting for a moment. forgetting she could die any minute — any second her ever so loving heart could stop. the blood rushing out her body, stopping all movement and short circuiting the brain. all of our memories saved for me, nobody to share them with.

her sharp inhale made my thoughts snap apart, my eyes immediately averting to her. "you okay?"

"yes, sorry. i just —" she grunts, trying to move her shoulder, "shoulder hurts like a bitch." she half-chuckled as i gazed into her dark eyes.

most of my concern dropped from my face, some still lingering in case she needed help to breathe or move or anything.

my mind seemed to race. what if she died and turned immediately? not giving me a chance to lay with her peaceful body before it decomposes, not giving me a chance to be with her.

rosita noticed my thinking, but didnt stop me until i realized her eyes were burning into the side of my face, making me turn half towards her.

"sorry, can't seem to stop thinking today," i try to smile but all efforts fail, a choked sob seeming to come out instead.

she didnt utter a word, just immediately took me into her arms. her scent engulfed my body, my skin melting to hers as if she was a mold.

i had forgot about coco — my mind making her presence slip my memory — her small, sleeping frame moving ever so slightly in the corner of my eye as rosita kept her arms around my body.

i looked back up at rosita, her face peaceful as she struggled to continue breathing. she didn't panic, not at all. she just stayed calm despite her instincts telling her to try to breathe.

i unwrapped her arms from around me, laying her down against her pillow. i gently lifted coco from her once-peaceful sleeping position, pressing their faces together as rositas eyes drifted closed.

our hearts seemed to stop in sync, my heart jumpstarting itself and pounding against my chest as her body became still.

——————————————————————————

about a year later,

i was out in alexandria gardening with coco. she babbled incoherently, giggling everytime my too big of a hat for my head kept tilting over, threatening to fall down.

i heard dull footsteps coming from behind me, my late instincts to grab my knife evaporated long ago, just being able to turn around without the consistent fear of dying looming over my head.

"hey," i grinned as i saw maggie walk towards me, taking her into my arms, hershel following right behind her like a lost dog.

"how're you?" she asked gently, taking a loose strand of her messed-up hair and tucking it behind her ear.

"i'm good, how are you holdin' up?" i returned the favor, my mind drifting every few seconds.

i had strangely realized — maggie smelled familiar. like home, but home used to be a person. my person, but that person wasn't here. the last physical reminder of her existence was next to me, gardening like her life depended on it.

——————————————————————————

note: i enjoyed writing this so very much ! i miss rosita so dearly

[sunny-ssunset]

Pretty in pink!

Chapter 2

South park x a girly reader

I suppose i'll make another since the other did soooo well it was hella fun to write tbh AGED UP

Sorry if its ooc or Y/n is a bit mean, I try to make my characters as realistic as possible and with that it means giving them bad qualities as well as good ones. If you have any feedback or like anything to add to the story please let me know

Welcome'd by the scent of freshly brewed coffee, Y/n walked to the till, Bebe clung to Y/n's arm as she asked for their orders, "Hiii tweak, could we get what we usually order?"

Tweak froze as soon as he heard Y/n speak, "GAH- YES." He dashed off to make drinks for the girls. Y/n giggled at Tweak's reaction, "Awwwh he's adorable"

"I'm sure he thinks your adorable too Y/n..." Wendy mumbled, not wanting Y/n to hear. "Wendy, You are so pretty I notice people fawning over you all the time! Besides You and Stan are fine arent you?" Y/n tried to comfort her, noticing the slight smile on Wendy's face, Its the thought that counts

"H-Here is your drink!" Tweek interupted, shaking as he handed Y/n and her friends' drinks over, blushing as Y/n's hand slightly brushed his, She smiled, handing the boy his cash.

They walked out of the coffee shop, giggling away and getting into Y/n's car, "Hey I heard Tweak likes Craig anyways." Bebe gossiped. "I thought that myth was busted when we saw Craig on a date with that New kid, What was their name again?" Said Y/n, putting the key into ignition.

"I'm not sure, They didnt have any memorable qualities" Wendy laughed as Y/n started driving to school, taking a sip of her drink. "Y/n Keep your eyes on the road" Bebe scolded taking her drink of her. "Hey i just bought you guys' drinks watch who yo- AH!" Y/n screeched swerving as she almost drove into another car. "Y/n this is the last time you are driving us" Wendy laughed awkwardly, trying to make light of the situation.

As the long nerve wrecking drive went on, and Y/n finally paying attention to the road, The girls FINALLY ended up at school. "That was soo long" Bebe cried, never sounding this relived in her entire life. "You are so dramatic" Y/n pouted rolling her eyes, "Girl you almost killed us" Wendy laughed at Y/n, Shifting her attention to her phone as she recieved a text from Stan.

Stan the man

We need to talk.

Cmon Wendy this is serious dont ignore me.

Wendy is typing...

Wendy knew what was coming, She always did its either a 'Its not you its me' or 'Its just the wrong time for me to be in a relationship right now' I mean yeah they'd get back together but relying on Stan's attention is the only source of self esteem she gets, its not like anyone else notices her with Y/n around...

"Wendy are you okay?" Y/n put an arm around Wendy's shoulder as she comforted the girl. "Yeah I think Stan wants to break up ag-"

"Hey hey hey pretty ladies!!!" Kenny interupted walking up to the girls not realising the context of the situation. "KENNY!!!" Y/n ran up to him, forgetting about Wendys problems to hug him.

"We'll talk later hun I promise" Y/n whispered, giving a comforting smile. How could Wendy hate her? She doesnt mean it, She didnt mean to ignore Wendy, She is too perfect to do that... Right?

[cosmicjoke]

levi is like pain is the best discipline

yet when in marley people wanted to hurt a kid because he stole from them levi jumped right in and didnt let them

i think he is mostly just talking abt this

yeah he sometimes used violence but he never enjoyed it and i think he was using it less as time went on

Well, yeah, exactly, because the thing is, Levi ISN'T a child abuser.

I've had people try to tell me that he is because of the handful of times he hits Eren, and the one time he hits Jean, completely ignoring the context of those moments, and also the fact that, by the standards of the time they were living in, Eren and Jean weren't considered children, and were also well-trained soldiers in a military unit. One which was directly under Levi's command. Physical discipline of soldiers is hardly unusual or unheard of.

The worst "beating" Levi ever gave Eren was during Eren's trial, and it was completely for show in order to save Eren from falling into the hands of the Military Police and being executed.

The second time he hit him, and Jean, it was because the two of them were acting like undisciplined fools the night before a pivotal mission to re-secure Shinganshina, a mission which they believed, at the time, the fate of humanity hinged on, and in which hundreds of new, inexperienced recruits would be joining them. Eren's and Jean's ridiculous fighting very much could have disrupted the discipline and cohesion necessary to their missions success, and put lives at risk. That kind of shit would never be tolerated in any military unit, anywhere in the world. Levi was also not in his regular state of mind, stressed out and feeling lost and confused after Erwin's confession to him about caring more about the basement than humanity, and refusing to back down from joining the expedition.

The third time Levi hits Eren, it's because Eren is directly threatening Levi, putting his hands on him, and trying to prevent him from carrying out his own duty as a soldier.

And the last time Levi hits Eren, is after the raid on Liberio, in which Eren has just murdered dozens upon dozens of innocent people and dragged Paradis and the Survey Corps into a war none of them agreed to or signed up for.

Every one of these instances isn't a case of child abuse. It's a superior officer disciplining a soldier who's directly under his command and who expects a certain amount of discipline and adherence from his soldiers, for the sake of the entire unit and its safety.

It's also important to note that Levi doesn't actually USE physical violence against his soldiers as a regular means of discipline. In other words, he doesn't make a habit of it. He only ever hits someone when the circumstances are extreme in some way, or call for some sort of extremity. So we know Levi doesn't really view giving someone a beating as an appropriate or normal form of disciplinary action. He only hits people when they've done something or acted in a way which endangers the mission, or other people.

Ramzi was just a little boy. Maybe ten years old, from the looks of him, if even. He didn't have any special military training, he wasn't a soldier, he didn't know how to fight or defend himself. Levi would never hit a little kid like that, I guarantee it. Because, again, he isn't a child abuser.

He never went around just beating kids up as a means of disciplining them, he never engaged in that or employed it as a regular means of teaching anyone anything. All the times Levi actually hits someone, it's more like a knee-jerk reaction than a deliberate form of disciplinary action. It isn't thought out or planned, it isn't a tactic employed with forethought or with some further goal beyond the immediate need to rein whoever's acting up in. He never hits anyone as a way of instilling any sort of lesson in them. It's just an immediate response to an out of hand situation. And, again, they're not just children, they're soldiers under his command, with heavy and serious responsibilities expected of them, and each of those only handful of times, the circumstances surrounding Levi's violence were extreme.

So, yeah, this isn't a case of Levi being abused and then becoming an abuser. There's a world of difference between him and Kenny and the way they operate.

[aita-blorbos]

AITA for summoning an onslaught of cat demons at the school of my brother's killer? Hi so for a bit of context, I 16(F) have a brother 14(Demiboy, calling him A), and they got to know this dalmatian 16(M, lets just call him P), and they started to get close, I thought P was pretty weird (i.e they like books about dissection of small animals) but i wasnt really one to judge to i kind of just ignored him. Well one day A tells me that he cut off ties with P by sending him a letter to never speak with A ever again, and i thought that would be the end of it. Good riddance right? Well soon enough P sent A a letter saying that A should come find P and apologize by midnight or he'd find A himself. Again i didnt think much of it, so i just told A to ignore the letter.

Well one day I find A dead (and his eyeball dissected out) and i kind of got mad, so summoned his spirit so that i could try to find his killer and enact revenge, but it turns out dying messes alot with your memories, so he couldnt remember much other than that his killer said "Hello puppy" right before killing him (Which is weird because A is a Cat, not a dog).

After alot of searching i find out the A's killer attends this high school for dogs (ugh, dogs), and so i did what any good witch would do and i snuck in and went to the basement to draw a magic circle to summon cat demons to tear through the school to find A's killer, although the cat demons werent very smart so they just started killing everything they saw. (and it didnt even work, because A's killers was still SOMEHOW alive, even after almost the entire school was dead) After a while of frustration, the basement we were in SOMEHOW got flooded, erasing the magic circle along with it. So i had to quickly move to a nearby classroom, and right after moving the magic circle to the classroom, A DOG 14(NB, calling them O) that was someone still alive came into the room along with their friends, at first i thought O was A's killers, but i realized O looked too awkward to do anything like that. Apparently O wanted to help us find A's killer, so i trapped their friends as a bit of incentive. And lo and behold! They found them! And it was actually P (and i should of guessed that in hindsight), and after a bit of scuffle A managed to posses P and take over his body, so essentially, P is dead now and A is back, albeit in his own killers body.

After that, i wanted to do something nice for O, since they did help alot, and it was their birthday soon too, so i thought, good timing right? Well apparently all those dogs that died kind of wanted revenge, so now thousands of undead hordes of dogs wandered over and completely ruined O's surprise birthday party, but now O is telling me that i should help the horde? And bring them back somehow? So tldr, AITA summoning an onslaught of cat demons at the school of my brother's killer? Causing thousands of unseeded causalities, and bringing forth hordes of undead dogs?

[saltymongoose]

I know its hard to believe it but think about it, Jeb was confirmed to have a bigger ego than Phobos himself, his goal of Being Nevada's Savior is more important than emotional attachments, he seems like the type of guy to not get attached because he thinks attachments will only make him weaker and easier to take advantage of, he likely developed a god complex after killing Phobos because, fuck man he killed Phobos of all people, by himself. he may not have come off as not considering Hofnarr a friend because him calling Hof 'old friend' in the game because he was manipulating, he needed to pull on Hofnarr's strings to have Hofnarr by his side so the plan would succeed, Hofnarr was just naive enough Christoff managed to pull it off. even Sheriff was victim of this, after the plan succeeded he even left Hofnarr behind to go do god knows what outside, then Hank came along and he was so focused on his job as Sheriff's bodyguard he left his "friend" for dead by the hands of Hank

he is no better than Phobos, only Phobos didnt make any connections in emotional senses and they had different goals

and to explain why would he help Sheriff in mc2-3 if he didn't think of the cowboy as his friend?- lets be real Sheriff probably ran begging Jeb to help him, which inflated Jeb's ego because of course Sheriff needed his help, if there's anyone who can stop Hank is him, Nevada's Savior, of course he'll help if it means his precious Nevada will be saved. Chritoff is an egotistical scumbag but its okay I kiss him on the head then put him in Hanks's bigass blender, will he blend?

of course we dont need to follow the canon, I myself have just nitpicked the canon and then gave Jeb a redemption arc, still, it makes sense why he wouldn't consider Hofnarr a friend and just use him for his goals.

-Plague Anon [|87

Huh. You know, Plague Anon, this actually makes a lot of sense. I feel like Jeb would definitely laud his self-imposed isolation as something that is entirely necessary to be the best Savior for Nevada. People who have this one goal as their fixation can tend to ignore everything around them anyway depending on how driven they are to reach it/how important it is to them (personal experience), and perhaps he also used this as a potential excuse as to why he'd willingly treat others as being so expendable. If he can convince himself that it was his only option and for the greater good, then he also absolves himself of all sins or wrongdoings.

[More under the cut :)]

I also took another look at the game because of this ask, and I realized that the way Christoff treats Tricky actually lends a lot to this as well. For one, the fact that Christoff still thought Hofnarr would be the exact same way at this time shows that he didn't bother checking in on him in the thirty year time skip between the Fall and the events of M:PN, so that shows from the beginning that they weren't as close as I'd assumed. (Outside of the stuff in the animations, which wasn't friendly either, let's be honest.)

Secondly, he doesn't really seem that concerned about Tricky in general. I mean, you'd think that if someone had a good friend and they turned into a zombie/Zed, they'd attempt to find some way to reverse that. Yet Jeb doesn't seem to really care, and still keeps that single-minded focus on shutting down Project Nexus. From the way it appears, Jebus couldn't care less about what happens/happened to Hofnarr so long as he was around to use for ending the Project, which fits in line with your theory (and Krinkels' words) about how their dynamic is. Tricky is harder to deal with than Hofnarr, but he has the same knowledge, so Jeb doesn't consider aiding him to be worth his time.

I also agree that the only sensible reason why Christoff would be so willing to help the Sheriff in the earlier animations is because of his savior complex (or that he just really hated Hank, which is another possibility). If we want to go into the flashbacks of M:PN as well, one could also argue that the Sheriff was another resource for Jeb to use, since he planned on having Sheriff and his Mercs help out while he handled things in the Nexus. It's another instance of Jebus using others for his personal gain.

So in conclusion, I've changed my mind. :)

Not only does this characterization fit more within canon at a second glance, but it also provides me with a lot more to work with when writing Jeb (especially angst, gotta love it). I already feel like this is going to get interesting, thanks for sending in this analysis, Plague Anon! :D ♡♡♡♡

[dullard]

1, 3, 8, 11, 13, 15, 22, 28, 29, 34, 44, 49 for Siamont pleeeease 👉👈

YOURE SO NICE I DIDNT THINK ANYONE WOULD DO AN OC ONE THAAAANK YOU im so excited

1. What motivates your character?

The pressing need for a safe and warm environment for children, especially in the face of disaster and tragedy.

3. Is your character an optimist or pessimist?

I think he's a realist, but he's a bit optimistic in general, because he sees the real ways things can turn out okay, and when he doesn't, he at least sees the ways he can make it not as bad as possible.

8. What are some internal obstacles that your character has to overcome?

He knows he really, really needs to talk more. Really badly. But its habitual that he doesn't, his tongue doesn't feel used to it anymore, it's not in his nature anymore... Plus, when other adults talk to him and expect a response, he shuts down. The only times he manages to talk a little is to the children, and he knows its not as much as it should be.

When he needs to talk to adults, he often writes, but it still makes him extremely anxious. He learned to write for this reason, actually.

11. What events in their past helped shape and influence them into who they are today?

Oh You Know ;)

If you asked him this question (and we ignore that he isn't a very talkative guy), his opinion is that one person shaped him almost entirely, and it's his younger brother.

His younger brother was why he learned to care for children, his younger brother was what drove him to take fishing seriously as a career and make money, the memory of his younger brother is what he sees in children that makes him care about them right away before he even knows them for themselves.

The loss of his brother had him not doing anything, and when he saw a child all alone he remembered his younger brother when he'd sit off to the side, and he knew it was like he was speaking to him, in a way, and telling him to do the thing he's best at. So he thinks his brother helped him decide to start the orphanage, too (But really, his own force of will is what helped him overcome his grief, and it was his own kindness that gave him purpose)

Also, obviously, he hates to admit the influence its had on him, but the encounter with pirates as a child where he lost his tail (and his voice, in a way) had a huge influence on who he is. He still fights against that trauma today every time he speaks.

13. Who is the closest person to your character?

His brother, for his whole life. Now that he's gone, I'm not sure. I assume someone else must work at the orphanage as an adult, and he's probably at least a little close with them, but he's very close with all the kids, and his inability to talk to other adults At All (He just can't make himself do it - He will want to, he will open his mouth, he will move his tongue, no sound will come out, and its very frustrating for him. It's driven him to tears before.) means he doesn't have very many close friendships emotionally.

15. What habits does your character have?

He watches around the floor and his feet when hes walking anywhere because he doesn't want to step on children, lol. He's not even that tall (although he's on the tall side for an ecaflip).

When he holds anything, he does the little bouncing with his body (I don't know how to describe it. It's the same motion you do to soothe a baby.)

Also, he likes to quietly watch the sunset. Usually the kids don't let it stay quiet though.

22. What regrets do they have, if any? (From any part of the story, not just exposition.)

He has plenty about where he was when the wave happened, but he knows that they're not reasonable (He survived because he was on a fishing boat, and his brother just would not have been there under any circumstances, no matter how much he thinks about "well maybe I could have..."

He sometimes has regrets about how he handles things the children need. He can always do better. He tries to apologize by doing something nice for them if he thinks he did the wrong thing, but he's never been mean to any of them, so they usually just think he's trying to cheer them up because they were sad earlier.

He regrets when he and his brother were kids and he said he wished he was an only child (I don't think his brother even remembered this as an adult, but it haunts Siamont), and he regrets a time he left a younger child for an hour when he was 11 years old and came back to the child crying because they thought he wasn't coming back. Lots of little things like that.

28. What emotion is the most unfamiliar to your character and how do they deal with it?

Anger doesn't come easily to him, but it takes him over. When it's at an adult, he usually just lets himself react with that anger and show it with his body. When it's at a child, he notices it and leaves the situation, then comes back when he's calmed down (so the children are most afraid of when he Looks A Little Angry, Then Leaves, even though he never does anything with it. They get the right response to fix what they did every time. It's just how the kids know they really messed up)

29. What are the three things that your character values most?

The children's safety, their emotional wellbeing, and his memories of his brother.

34. What are three negative traits that your character has?

Silence, letting his anger take hold of him when he thinks its justified (He has killed. many pirates in this state, when he probably didn't need to kill every single one of them on the ship and could have let them flee), and thinking he can take on everything on his own

44. What does your character fear?

Losing anyone else. Also, in general, rogues trigger bad memories for him, and he's way more likely to fight someone if they're a rogue.

49. In the end, what is your character grateful for?

The children, their safety, their joy, their play, their creativity, their...

Well, a lot of things about his kids.

His memories of his brother, and his memories of Sufokia as it was and the people he's lost. They hurt, but he holds them tight to his chest.

The luck of the sea (The sea is where luck comes from, in his eyes - Fish, driftwood, seaweed, he's even grateful, sometimes, after he's handled the rogues on board, for the pirate ships, because he takes what they need from it (including, usually, a lot of the clothes from the pirates that he fixes to fit the kids, and their sails and some of the wood from their ship and their food and... everything.) before setting it ablaze and sending it off. )

I'm insane thank you so much for my life laura i had so much fun doing this thank you thank you thank you thank you

[angiethewitch]

I'm sorry about the ppl crossing boundaries on the post about your husband. I noticed your response to the sherlock holmes person mentioned you grew up in foster care. were there any good experiences? is it an age-out system? do you get any support when you do? do you know if the welsh system is different from others? how did you meet your husband?

I had quite a turbulent couple of years in the system early on, but eventually I was in a long term placement with my mum and she eventually adopted myself and my brother (who is my only blood related sibling, the rest were either fellow adoptees or my mums bio kids). I didnt really have any good experiences with specifically the system, it was all pretty crap to be honest. the social workers themselves weren't great and messed with my head a lot. because my birth mother gave us up voluntarily, we were still in regular court supervised contact (and nowadays I can see her of my own free will, we're pretty close! she's not a mother to me but more like a friend or a cousin or something) and her social workers were nice, I really liked one specific worker she had. she was a nice Indian lady who once made me a gorgeous embroidery of a tortoise. she didn't have to, she wasn't my worker, but she did it anyway. she could have ignored us and still done her job correctly but she would chat to us and play with us during contact meetings if my birth mother wasn't feeling well or was nervous.

im not really sure if it was an age out system, I think that's more on a case by case basis, but the British system is more focused on getting kids either in long term placements (adopted or otherwise) or returning them to family eventually. the welsh system is just the British system with even less funding somehow. admittedly I don't know much about other peoples experiences, but from what I know the British system is different in the sense there aren't private adoption agencies, its funded by the government and the employees are government employees. from what I understand a lot of American carers are private carers and the adoption agencies pocket the money themselves, but I could be wrong. again I don't really know if you get support, I don't remember a lot from that time of my life, but I do know when I turned 16 my case was closed as I was considered old enough to make my own choices without state supervision. that meant I could see my birth mother without supervision and whenever I felt like it, which I did, and we grew a lot closer without a support worker stood there taking notes! I cant really speak for other people though, I don't really know or remember much. from what my family and my mum told me, there wasn't really much support after I was adopted to be honest, theoretically I was still "in the system" but in practice I was effectively left on my own from my adoption day onwards.

I met my husband through a friend, one day my friend asked if I fancied going for a drive with her and her cousin. I was actually with the girl i was seeing at the time, we weren't official or exclusive, although getting there slowly. she was invited along too. my friends cousin pulled up outside my flat and out popped this beautiful man. I thought he was much older than me because 1) he could drive and 2) he was tall and muscular and most blokes my age looked my age. turns out he's only 6 months older than me, he just looks like an absolute unit and much older. he recalls at the time that his cousin was trying to get him out socialising, because he'd actually only just started to recover from his disability and being bedbound for his entire teenage life so far. he'd only really just gained the ability to walk again at the time. he said his cousin directed him to a random flat in a rough town and out I came, an excitable manic skinny blue haired girl who he heavily suspected was on drugs (I was - I was in the depths of my cocaine addiction at the time) with a small girl in tow. apparently I danced all around the place talking a million miles an hour and hopped in the car and away we went. we ended up walking up a mountain that day. from that moment on we were inseperable, he was my best friend. I broke things off with the girl I was seeing when she started getting a little possessive, and started dating this guy who was really bad news. my husband was there for me through all of it, he was genuinely my best mate, and when things ended very badly with this guy (it's a whole other story) we started hanging out on a daily basis. he said he fell for me very quickly and decided he was going to marry me one day.

funnily enough, he'd actually known of me for years. I was his instagram crush for about 3 years before we met, and I ended up being best friends with his high school crush (you've met her, in my recent youtube video about pride. she was my maid of honour) so he knew of me far before I met him. he says he can't believe he managed to get in a relationship with his teenage instagram crush. he thinks too highly of me honestly, he utterly adores me and I adore him. we were pretty much joined at the hip from the second we met.

I will say "whirlwind romance" is an understatement, we got engaged very quickly and married just over a year after getting into a relationship. we were dumb kids playing at adulthood and we were very lucky things turned out so good, because it could have gone very badly. I think it helped that he was my best friend before and had seen me in every state imaginable - blackout drunk, manic, psychotic, self destructive, angry, sad - so he knew exactly how turbulent my life was and he decided he loved me anyway. he supported me through rehab and through the process of getting diagnosed with schizophrenia and the treatment that entailed. thankfully as we grew up we grew together and not apart. People were definitely right when they said we were too young and it was too soon though, we're just lucky we seemed to be perfectly fit to handle eachothers crap. he's the person I feel I can be completely myself around and he's supported me through so much. he's had his own struggles with physical and mental health, but I won't get into that, its his story to tell.

sorry for such a long answer, I know you only wanted to know how I met him, but I felt like telling you more. I hope this answers your questions! have a good day!

[stuckinapril]

hey girl… may I ask for advice? sorry to dump this on you, feel free to ignore of course! I just don‘t know where to put this right now and it‘s been eating at me for the past two months

I met a guy around 8 months ago and we instantly connected really intensely and even fell in love in a really short amount of time (obviously all of that was based on very brief interactions and didn‘t have anything to do with actual love but it was still nice and i felt like something could grow from it), however due to our personal circumstances we decided to be friends. The last time I saw him was 7 months ago. We ended up making out that night. The next morning he made it very clear he didnt want a relationship and i didn’t either. We kept texting every day and i asked to see him again but when we finally managed to find a day to hang out he would cancel the same day because he wasn‘t feeling well mentally (which I would never judge or question because I have my bad weeks too) but this happened like 5-6 times and I felt like he just didnt want to see me again, or at least it wasn’t important to him right now. I involuntarily pulled back from our texting relationship over the summer because of work but still it was always me except for one time who was asking to hang out. Then I started actually pulling back because I was hurt from him rejecting me all the time. At this point it’s not even just about the romantic feelings, I feel like we’re not even friends anymore. I feel stuck, I feel myself wanting to pull back and I feel stupid when he rejects me being nice to him (we always tease each other but he used to be more caring and accept care from me too). I want to be there for him and let him know that I‘m not going anywhere (because i’m not, i want him in my life) but at the same time i notice myself falling into an obsession because of him being so inconsisent. Do you think I can take a step back without losing him and abandoning our friendship entirely? I don‘t want to make a big thing out of it because I know he‘s been very busy working but then again it‘s not too much to want to see him once in 7 months and I made time for him when i was drowning in work. I wonder what happened or what has changed for him. I just don‘t know where to put all of this care that I have for him

reading your ask gave me deja vu bc i went through every single phase you’re describing w my ex. hell, i was going through it as late as october. your feelings are valid. your feelings are really valid and raw and i deeply relate to every single thing you’re saying. but that’s why i need to bluntly tell you—there is no future friendship (or relationship, for that matter) to be maintained with this man. just trust me on this. i went through the “maybe we could be friends!!” phase too. i so badly wanted him to stay in my life too. it didn’t work. it won’t work for you either. you need to go no contact. absolutely cut him out of your life. you will not move on any other way.

how do i know this? bc that’s the only thing that really, truly helped me. you’re going to feel withdrawals at first. it’s literally like a dopamine fix. the moment you remove him from your life, the chemicals in your brain will go crazy. they so badly crave the presence of this person. but is what he’s giving you even a presence? y’all have literally not seen each other for 7 months. imagine all the other guys you could have met in that time. imagine the opportunities lost. 7 billion people in this world, and you’re stuck fixating on this person who’s giving you breadcrumbs. literal breadcrumbs. it’s seriously time to consider you.

but this is not sustainable. it’s damaging. it’s hard to believe, but this man is neither the cause nor the solution to your pain. even if he were prevalent in your life, this would not fix the root issue—which is that so much of your happiness is attached to this person. you’re dependent on him. you can’t need a person. you can want them, but you can never need them. you need to detach and find yourself. that’s what i had to do as well. back when i was going through the thick of my breakup, it seemed crazy to me not to have him in my life. i genuinely thought he enriched it. but if he was truly the only source of enrichment, did that mean i was living a full life to begin with? a person shouldn’t be the only reason i find my days exciting. i should be the only one responsible for my emotions—and if a person walks out, i should be fine. it shouldn’t consume me. that’s not healthy. that’s a problem.

i reiterate: it wouldn’t even matter if he was the best companion you could’ve asked for. the simple fact of the matter is you’re relying way, way too much on another person for happiness and fulfillment. this is something you need to go through alone.

you need to cut him off. i was in denial about this too. you may be for a while as well. but all keeping him in your life, in any capacity, will do is hurt you. this is not the behavior of a man who cares or wants to be helped. and people simply can’t be fixed. only they can give themselves the permission to be better. your only option—for the sake of you—is to walk out, endure the pain, grow from it, and fulfill yourself without needing someone else. i swear. i have been there so many times. that’s the only thing that will help.

[yuukei-yikes]

Ok after your whole “shintaro misogyny” “shinaya?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??????!,!,?,?,?,?,?,,,” rant (loved btw, Jin stop making ur female characters rely on male counterparts, stop making your male characters hate women or believe they are incapable challenge), how do you feel about Kanoshin. I know you have talked about it before but like, idk, talk about it again lol.

Kano “I can fix him” Shuuya? Or Kano “I can make him worse” Shuuya.

JQKEOEKDWODIEID MY WHOLE "SHINTARO MISOGYNY" AND "SHINAYA?!?!?!?!?" thats so funny i didnt MEAN for it to be a rant. i was just venting 💔 BUT THANK U FOR LOVING IT BC I FUCKING LOVE TALKING ABOUT THAT BECAUSE I HAVE SO MANY BOTTLED UP FEELINGS.

man. kanoshin. i dont think they're an i can fix him or i can make him worse duo. i dont think they are together FOR each other, they're together for their personal gratification if that makes sense??? at least that's how it starts. like they rly feed off of each other's worst coping mechanisms and validate themselves thru that. but through doing this obviously cant help to get to know each other and shintaro is pathetically laughing at kano's jokes and kano is pathetically kicking his feet and twirling his hair at shintaro groaning pathetically on the ground abt god knows what (NEVER forget this novel 7 moment)

also its so funny how often in the novels shintaro just physically throws himself on the ground to start moaning and groaning whenever he gets embarrassed. he's such a fucking freak. like who the fuck does that

shintaro and kano in the seventh novel are so insanely gay it's SO fucking good. THE BIT WHERE SHINTARO SMILES AT KANO AND KANO'S LIKE HUH...THAT'S HOW HE USED TO SMILE AT AYANO... HE ALWAYS HAD THIS SPECIAL SMILE FOR HER, AND NOW HE'S SMILING JUST LIKE THAT TO ME... like GIRLLLL *EXPLODES THEM WITH MY MIND* there is seriously no heterosexual explanation for any of that. god the seventh novel is so so so good. all of them are so good i wonder why it's the least consumed kagepro media they're SUPERIOR. the novels my #1 forever i fucking love them.

anyways. im normal erm kanoshin hehehehehehehhehe i think they're both far too terrified and disgusted abt their feelings for each other to consider stuff like "i can fix him" or "i can make him worse" YOU GET WHAT IM SAYING??? on this subject specifically, shintaros self hatred comes from well everything bitch hates himself but if we're talking abt kanoshin. 1. its ayanos brother. even if we dont even look at shinaya ever being romantically involved in the first place, THIS IS WEIRD TO HIM. 2. internalized homophobia arc☝️☝️☝️🙏🙏🙏👍👍👍👍💯💯💯

the fic i drew fanart of a couple days ago is SO *EATS IT EATS IT EATS IT* or also a soulmate au that i havent read in aaaages and also never finished but in that one shintaro was already out as bi... sadly both are aus WHICH DOESNT make them bad, aus are awesome but the things I'd do for content like that set post str. please. *bite bite bite bite bite* srry i bring these fics up cuz hehehe internalized homophobia shintaro is so good

maybe kano would eventually set for i can make him worse but it's in an attempt of scaring shintaro away. he's like im gonna self sabotage so much to make sure he stays away from me but shintaro is STILL here looking pathetic and kano's like god DAMMIT. erm. yeah.

btw now for me being crazy (tw me using shintaro as a stress toy to make me laugh): i think post str shintaro is not AS BAD with being absolutely fucking insufferable abt his whole guys rule girls drool thing because my man's had a little time to grow (ignores shinaya chapter in the eighth novel so i don't go insane with anger). i think post str shintaro makes 1 sexist comment and the entire mekakushi dan just fucking freeze for a moment. and give him an intervention and force him to say im sorry women and ever since then is more mindful of his actions. sorry i have to be delusional and believe this or else I'd just fucking hate his ass. im sorry shinaya i love you but *burns novel 8 shinaya chapter*

shintaro's messy relationships post str is my favorite stress toy btw. relationship with ayano crumbles. starts WHATEVER THAT IS with kano. in the self hatred confusion and internalized homophobia and etc the situation causes him (situation being gf dumped me bc im selfish so i hate myself / i kissed a boy a couple times so i hate myself) he desperately turns to the next closest Female(?) Counterpart with the following thought process "Pfff well i am so straight and SO capable of holding a normal relationship and i can PROVE IT there is one person who is 1. girl enough 2. apparently okay with me being a selfish asshole and consuming all their energy with my bullshit". so the solution is obvious to shintaro. just date takane.

turns out hitting on your best friend who also happens to be ur other best friend's gf is not good for either one of these relationships. so his friendship with not only takane but also haruka crumbles too in response and its so awkward. takane bc 1. i dont feel this way abt you and I'd treat the situation sensibly if i didnt know you well enough to know you dont actually like me that way and ur just taking me for granted like youve been doing all this time which WAS pissing me off and on its way to eventually explode but THIS....??? and haruka 2. YOU JUST HIT ON MY GIRLFRIEND?? (shintaro would be like maaan why did you tell haruka. and harutaka are like *slam door on his face*) situation drives shintaro to possibly end up kissing kano again. 🤨

its so hilarious. to me at least. ITS FINE he will get over it and makeup with everyone but i like making him suffer 👍 this is what you get shintaro. What do you have to say to the women in the world. apologize. say im sorry women. say it. say it and I'll leave you alone. sorry i went a little crazy in the end

[gyahyahyahayhahayahyahyahyahyaha]

dreamt that i was a super famous witch that nobody knew a damn thing about but everyone who knew of me was like deathly afraid of me. most of these ppl were so afraid that they would basically blame just about anything bad that happens, big or small, on “the witches curse”

i, however, was simply chilling

just doing all kinds of magic by my self and living my life and having a generally pretty good time, an when i wasnt doing like magic experiments and blowing shit up, i would be engaging in my various hobbies and/or cooking. i had this nice little garden that “culminated” into this very pretty, slanted spiral made entirely out of various grasses and plants. it was all arranged in a very special way that honestly im not sure how id describe, almost like a cylindrical hall of mirrors? anwyays most days id conjure up various instruments amd play then for the plants 🌱 as ime watering or pruning or digging stuff up. i also had a second garden which the plant spiral led to. this one had some plants too, but it was more dedicated more towards the various exchanges ive made with all the random strangers, who ive accidentally encountered at “my mountain”. large floating mass of land that i conjured up and shaped to be my home where i spent most of my time, especially since it was so vast and had such varied environments. anyways the random encounters ive had with ppl were all my fault, due to maybe some curse or perhaps it was this inherent chance that laid within my magic. any spell or conjuration or like literally anything i did that had to do with magic, had a small chance to “summon” complete strangers from anyplace and anytime, usually at the very least one at a time until i send that specific set of ppl back to wherever/whenever they came from.

anywyas so ya like i had these little floating globules allover the place that i grew in my garden (by conjuring up spheres of water, letting plants take root IN the water and then taking some of that water and doing other magic shit withit) that basically served as like those spots in museums where u press the button and a prerecorded voice tells u about whavever ur looking at. i used them and basically had them set up as traps all over the... island cuz ppl would be showinf up whereever and whenever. the trap was simply just bestowing "information about the time, place, where, who and how". again like those museum info buttons with a prerecorded message. i didnt use them unless i felt it was absolutely necessary and like they were about to start some shit or smth. normally at first i would try to ignore them cuz with the entire island being the way it is ( chalk full of vegetation and life, oh we even got a cool lil desert somewhere around. its not too big but not too small. i had sculpted it for the purpose having access to certain desert based plant and animal life for like cooking or reagents or just sliding around the dunes) they could probably survive on their own. i also didnt want to drop whatever inwas doing to go greet thrm cuz half of the time a lot of them would immediately recognize me somehow. one of the few reasons i ever left the island was to try n find the shithead thats spreading rumours about me to the point that most ppl around could tell who i was at first glance as well as having them be as afraid of me as they are. it was annoying tryna deal with that every time so i usually let them do their thing unless i could see they were like causing trouble or they werent gonna make it.

main reason i didnt immediately send them back was cuz i had to make sure i sent them back properly, also like, i wanted to see if i could trace + assess how the rumours were developing so inwould eventually talk to them and show them SOME hospitality. i know it wasnt anyones fault in particular that ppl kept showinf up, but when most ppl who do show up are THAT afraid of u based on some bullshit rumours, dealing with it was just...annoying... after proving thst im not an immediate threat and that the rumours were bullshit(sometimes i WOULD fuck with them cuz i knew they were boutta start some bullshit), i would usually ask them where theyre from and what its like and then try to divine some of the local specialties and cook that for them. then if they liked it id give them a couple samples of the islands local food. we had a LOOOOOT of fucked up and interesting plants growinf here, some was the natural course of things and some of it was by my design and experimentation. of course making sure there were no side effects that i couldnt just magic away was a concern since the local wildlife and my own self wasnt a particularly useful point of reference, given all the fucked up magic bullshit that the island itself and i are always up to.

i dont remember any specific visitors in particular but the way it would usually go is,

they show up whileim doing magic

-> if they arent causing trouble, i leave them alone (even if they were causing trouble i usually had jus tthe right spell to like fuck withthem enough to get them to stop, i usually liked to use enchantments or illusions that like would guide them towards a lake and let them chill out OR i would just fuck with them indirectly or directly until they were ready to like not destroy me n my island)

-> once im done withwhat im doing and like feel like it, i otherwise lead them to my garden/house or some specific location (or i go to them)

-> we do the whole "who are you" song n dance

-> i convince them to talk about where theyre frome

-> i make food or drink for them or let themdo it themselves or ask them to teach me, OR i just figure it out

-> we talk more

-> i learn about the time n place theyre from, they learn that the rumours are more or less bullshit (cuz i mean i guess they COULD be true considering how powerful of a witch i was but yknow, will and intent an all thatbulshit ALSO LIKE IM A FUCKIGN HERMIT WITCH)

-> we exhange info about our various goings on and lifestyles

-> if theyre interested i invite them to make some kind of "tether" that would help not only send them back but also allow them to return if they so wished. i tell them about the garden/shrine (cuz it enshrines all the memories and effects dedicated to our various encounters hehe)

-> tether gets made (and yeah the tether could be just about anything, a scrap of paper, maybe something with something written on it, a sculpture of some kind, something culturally significant to the person in question, knickknacks, or some times they just give me something they were carrying on them at the time. one thing i usually liked to do was trade knives. i would make a knife (sometimes out of pure magic, or i would just fire the smithy up and we'd make it together) for them and i would ask if they wanted to trade and if they didnt id just give them the damn thing anyways. i mean yeah thats what the tether was. it was always an "exchange". the objects exchanged would always serve as the tether. always)_

-> i place the tether in the second garden/museum/shrine of encounters, putting them iin a display case, a hanging rack, or set it up in some way, shape, or form. taking care of these was also a nice way to pass the time.

->using the tether, i send them back if they want to go back immediately or i give them a magic thing that lets them go back whenever they want and let them do whatever, as long as they arent fucing everytihng up

-> i go bakc to enjoying my solitary floating island lifestyle

-> repeat

oh shit i almost compeltely forgot this ones so long lmao

so at some point after like living as described for who knows how many years, i ended up getting "summoned" myself. i was like summoned onto this thing like one of those bird watering fountains but with a magic circle on it

like this but the top was completely flat and thats where the circle was. iw as just like sitting in the fountain and i waslike absolutely fucking astonished, like how could they have done this to ME. how did i not notice it in time to intercept the spell, how couldi have let this happen, etc, etc. i was like on my knees sitting in the fountain and im just thinking how bullshit this all was when i finally noticed ppl circled around me. i was so mad. i think i just like threw large branches at them all or smth. i thinki woke up around then

[fictionkinfessions]

People reacting to my scars was always interesting.

Not the one on my face, people were pretty normal abt that one (and it had faded quite a bit over the years anyway so it was easy to miss after awhile)

But the burn scars from Abyss mages. From the time I got my vision. They were all over my arms. Was kinda hard to not react to them.

I was prone to long sleeves just because they were comfortable, but alot of people thought I was ashamed of my scars or something. Honestly I wasnt, I didn't mind them. Though covering my arms did help quell weird/concerned looks from strangers.

But. Here's how some people felt about/reacted to them them from my memory.

Mom was proud of them to an extent, but also seemed to have some guilt. She felt bad I was scarred obviously, but she always saw them as representation for the day I saved her life and got a vision for it. There was some back-tones of wishing she could have protected me properly that day. But well we both had mixed feelings about the day overall.

Klee and Alice was all guilt. They both blamed themselves for me having them. Since I was trying to find Klee at the time the Mages jumped me, and Alice had left Klee in Lisa's care for the weekend knowing she'd come back to me with a Vision, but didnt know what I'd have to go through to get it. I never held it against either of them. Klee was like. 6/7 at the time, I'm just glad the mages didnt even try to go near her. And Alice's premonition was perposefully obfuscated from her to be the catalyst for my growth as a person. Thats not her fault, and she always wished she didnt leave Mond entirely that weekend. Though admitedly I was mad at Alice about it for a bit. But I was 10/11 when it happened. Of course I blamed the wrong person.

Bennett always painted it as us "matching" since he had so many scars from his adventures across his arms. I obviously had more at the beginning, but every time Bennett got a new scar on one of his arms he'd try to look over mine just to point out that he "now has an equivalent". It was funny, and he's honestly part of why I was so neutral about my scars after a few years.

Collei was really shocked by them. I had never shown my bare arms to her when we first met, so she didnt learn they even existed for 2-3 years (Mostly because of the region seperation). When she first saw them she thought something had happened after she left (Since my other scar happened while she was in mond). I gave a brief summary of how I got them. She looked so worried. Asked if they'd ever fade (They wouldnt, abyss magic is weird. They almost always looked freshly healed), if I wanted them to-(At that point I didnt really care) She asked a lot of questions and I answered them best I could. I adored her curiosity about everything.

Tighnari tried to ignore them for the most part. He tried really hard to not show his shock and worry when he first saw them one morning. We were in a bit too much of a rush for him to ask about or acknowledge them at the time. Later down the line he asked if they were ever treated properly due to the apperance. I told him I was pretty sure, but they're from abyss mages so it's hard to tell. He nodded, understood what I ment pretty well. He offered to help treat them should I ever need it for any reason. I appreciated it. He wasn't always great at showing he cared, so offering his medical expertice was like the closest he could get to it. It was nice, one of the first times I really felt fully accepted in Gandharva Ville, as a Forest Ranger, and as a friend of Tighnari's. He never acknowledged them again though, sounds like him to be honest pfft.

I don't remember anyone else's reactions right now. But I can probably guess how some would react. (Diluc and Cyno protectiveness Im 100% confident in that guess)

I hope to remember more. Maybe I'll get some more mems when I get around to drawing them out.

~Razor Minci 🕯♟(Please leave last name out of tags thank you)

P.S. Man I really cant stop submitting massive walls of text in this ask box huh- I know mpc typically likes all the text but I am so sorry to the followers, these gotta get annoying to scroll through xD

=

[t4tdanvis]

very sorry if this is a dumb question but may I ask why you’re pro-endo? As a gender accelerationist I’m 100% for mspecs but endo systems are one thing I’ve heard of that really confuses me

i have no idea what gender accelerationist means 😭 /lh

but anyways, we used to be really pro-endo, and then we became really anti-endo (for like... a couple weeks? a month? cant remember exactly lol), and then now were once again pro-endo. this means weve seen all the different sides of the argument (even ones from communities we... really wished we hadnt ever been a part of - iykyk)

and yknow what? at the end of the day, it really doesnt matter. the only time ive ever had a mental health professional use endo systems/"fakers" as an argument against us having DID was from a mental health professional that said i was "too young" to know... basically anything about myself (including but not limited to being autistc, intersex, depressed, and having PTSD). that same mental health professional also said that i couldnt have DID bc i "remembered my trauma too well", so... given that no pro-endo mental health professional has ever acted that way, its a bit telling about the ideology as a whole, yknow?

anti-endo culture centers around fakeclaiming, hypermedicalization of absolutely everything, and being a Super Special Community Of Unique Special People that no one could ever understand or be a part of without checking off an entire list of boxes (and if u dont fit every single one of those boxes, ur a faker and ur harming the community and ur basically as bad as a literal fascist). i would know because ive been in several anti-endo servers, and i used to have anti-endo friends. sure, theyll deny this to hell and back, but when u actually go deeper into their communities, the nice and kind and accepting people are a very rare exception

i personally think that u dont know better than someone else about whats going on in their head. u have literally no way to tell if someone is faking or not, and fakeclaiming only hurts people who arent actually faking (an actual faker knows theyre faking, and will continue to do so regardless of how many times u tell them that theyre faking)

u just have to ask urself "is this person actually causing any harm?". u being made uncomfortable or upset by their very existence is not harm. some random 14 year old on the internet saying theyre a system without trauma is actually not hurting anyone. it is not misinformation or harm to just. have a different worldview, yknow? there are far bigger problems in the world than a pretty small online community. someone identifying as endogenic does not make them as bad as a Literal Nazi

not to mention there are so many things we dont know about when it comes to the human brain. systems have been barely studied at all. acting like its just Impossible for anything to exist outside of a very strict definition of systemhood is just. stupid. bc how do u know?? did u do literally any studies on it?? no u didnt bc barely anyone has!! and in fact professionals state that non-traumagenic plurality DOES exist - people just like to ignore that part in the dsm-v (or claim that it means something entirely different, which it doesnt, its pretty clear lmao)

tl;dr: u can do what u want forever idc 👍