#we debated it for a while

[ihavedonenothingright]

Happy anniversary of the death of Alexander the Great to all who celebrate!

[fuckmeyer]

the choice between Edward & Jacob is not a question of which relationship is healthier or which partner is best suitable for Bella. neither is correct. neither is best. neither produces a happy ending for Bella. at the end of the day this is still a vampire novel. any choice Bella could make would yield, at best, a bittersweet happily ever after.

if she chooses Edward, she gets the terrifying Breaking Dawn ending: a girl who rejected her call to grow up has hung her love & her eternity on an emotionally stunted partner who hates himself marginally less than he loves her. she's a teen mom with a kid she never wanted who perpetuates the generational trauma passed down from her parents. by keeping this child, the Cullens have set the stage for an uprising/cold war against the Volturi who are likely to take revenge in order to maintain power. Bella is living in a tenuous "dream come true" wrapped in a nightmare & doesn't realize it.

choosing Jacob is the true coming-of-age ending that rips the stitches out of a wound that never fully healed. even if we ignore the fact that she ends up with a man who sexually assaulted her (we must bear in mind Jacob's character is influenced by smeyer's racism, but it did happen), they can't have a secure romantic relationship. based on the high imprinting rate of the pack, Jacob will likely find his imprint in his lifetime & will lose himself to the imprintee. he will no longer be her Jacob. he will inevitably abandon her (whether he wants to or not), & she must reconcile with the reality that she will always be inadequate to Jacob's imprint. & say he never manages to escape the vampires? he will presumably not age for a long time, meaning the relationship Bella always feared with Edward (her being an old grandmother while he stays forever young) remains a possibility. this is the story of a girl who slaps a Band Aid on an open wound & calls herself healed while flinching every time she sees the shadow of the knife that cut her.

if she chooses neither (team therapy), her healing requires her to lose or be at least partially disconnected from everyone she cares about. Bella must spend the rest of her life shut out from one world while never fully existing in her human world ever again. she must always keep secrets. she can never go back home. even in the unlikely event that she manages to escape the Volturi, the threat of being hunted by vampires will never leave her. in addition, she must face her worst fears (aging, losing Edward) while always keeping in mind the immortal life that could have been hers, if only.

even the "healthiest" option produces scars that will never quite heal.

Twilight is a horror. Twilight is a vampire novel. Twilight is gothic. Twilight is fiction. neither Edward nor Jacob is a "bad" choice because neither will give Bella her happily ever after. the choice between Edward & Jacob is simply a matter of which horror story you prefer to read.

[inkskinned]

you have to go to work so you can pay for your doctor, who is not taking your insurance right now, and if you say i can't afford the doctor's you are told - get a better job. it is very sad that you are unwell, yes, but maybe you should have thought about that before not having a better job.

(where is the better job? who is giving out these better jobs? you are sick, you are hurting - how the hell are you supposed to be well enough for this better job?)

but you go to the doctor because you had the nerve to be hurt or sick or whatever else. and they tell you that it is because you have anxiety. you try your best. you are a self-advocate. you've done the reading (which sometimes pisses them off worse, honestly). you say it is actually adding to my anxiety, it is effecting my quality of life. so they say that you are fat. they say that all young people have this happen to them, isn't it a medical marvel! they say that you should eat more vegetables. they say that you probably just need to lose a little more weight, and that you are faking it for attention.

(what attention could this doctor possibly give? what validation? that's their fucking job, isn't it?)

there is always a hypochondriac, right. someone always tells you about a hypochondriac. or someone who is unnecessarily aggressive during the worst days of their life. or someone looking "for a quick fix". or some idiot who wasn't educated about how to properly care for themselves who just abandons their treatment. and again, the hypochondriac, the overly-cautious hysteric. these people don't deserve to be treated like humans (right), and since you might be one of these people, you also don't get treated like a human. because those people can really fuck with the system, you now have to pay for it. and besides. you're actually probably faking it.

(more often than not, you find a 2:1 ratio of these stories. for every "hypochondriac", there are 2 people who knew something was wrong, and yet nobody could fucking find it. the story often ends with pointless suffering. the story often ends with and now it's too late, and it's going to kill me.)

you are actually just making excuses. someone else got that procedure or that diagnosis and he's fine, you should be fine too. someone else said they watched a documentary about other inspirational people with your exact same condition, maybe you should be inspirational, too. you're just too morbid. your pain and your experience is probably just not statistically concerning. it is all self-reported anyway, and you're just being a baby.

(once, while sitting down in the middle of making coffee, you had the sudden, horrible thought - i could kill myself to make the pain stop. you had to call your best friend after that. had to pet your dog. had to cry about it in the shower. you won't, but that moment - god, fuck. the pain just goes on and on.)

you know someone who went in for routine surgery and said i still feel everything. they told her to just relax. it took her kicking and screaming before they figured out she wasn't lying - the anesthetic drip hadn't been working. you know someone who went in for severe migraines who was told drink water and lose weight. you know someone who was actively bleeding out and throwing up in the ER and was told you're just having a bad period.

in the ER there are always these little posters saying things like "don't wait! get checked today!" and you think about how often you do wait. how often the days spool out. you once waited a full week before seeing the doctor for what you thought was a sprained wrist. it had actually been broken - they had to rebreak it to set it.

but you go into the doctor. the problem you're having is immediate. the person behind the counter frowns and says we're not taking your insurance. you will be paying for this out-of-pocket.

they send you home with tylenol and a little health packet about weight loss or anxiety or attention deficit. on the front it has your birthday and diagnosis. you think about crying, and the words swim. it might as well say go fuck yourself. it might as well say you're a fucking idiot. it might as well say light your money on fire and lie down in it. and the entire fucking time - the problem persists.

it's okay. it's okay, it's just another thing, you think. it's just another thing i have to learn to live with.

[vaguely-concerned]

To the ‘themes I am picking up on in Veilguard’ list, let's go ahead and add what I have a sneaking suspicion will actually turn out to be The theme:

— the world has changed and can never be as it was again.

— I have been changed and can never be who I was again.

— in this simple unavoidable truth there is endless grief and endless hope.

And I… may be getting a bit emotional about it haha. Let me show my work a bit: 

if da:o is a game about people who are already dead or half ghosts in some form (through societal forces, psychologically, functionally, literally, in body, through the joining etc.) coming together anyway to save the world from being swallowed by total nihilism and despair (symbolized by the blight) through the power of love and friendship and also this sword/potential heroic sacrifice that I found, da2 is a game about people who have lost their homes and been set adrift finding and building new homes in each other (while completely failing to save the world. also through the power of love and friendship. as well as years of petty bickering <3 we must imagine kirkwall if not happy then worth having been because the love was there the love was there and that's the only sanctifying force we can ever have in this doomed world and city of ours), and da:i is a game about old stabilizing-but-unjust comfortable lies vs. disruptive but potentially liberating uncomfortable truths, and the power of friendship to help us distinguish the one from the other and navigate through them...

folks… I'm starting to think that veilguard might be a game specifically about moving towards recovery and acceptance after trauma — about how even in this flawed, severed, scarred state, what is here right now is worth loving and worth caring for. even in an imperfect and impermanent world and self, there is worth and joy. and of course the first real tragedy — and threat — of Solas is that he just cannot find it in himself to accept this and move on, to let go of what was, the regret won’t let him go or he won’t let go of it. which means that even though on the surface it’s Elgar’nan and Ghilan’nain (and the will to subjugate and violate they represent) who are the main villains, the real antagonistic force in this story beneath that is the Dread Wolf’s despair. A despair Rook must make an answer to by the end of the game, one way or another, compassionately or with righteous fury, triumphant or pyrrhic.

The world will change again and again and so will you — BUT the crucial element is that so will everyone else who exists along with you, you are fundamentally not alone in this existential truth. all we’ll ever have is each other and my god that is plenty, my god that is enough!!! Which is the second thing Solas just can’t accept, he keeps himself separate and completely alone out of an awful mix of fear and pride and feeling himself unworthy of anything else. Rook and the player want to save the world of Thedas because it’s where everyone we love lives, Solas wants to go back to the past because that’s the only neighbourhood where he can still visit those he loved — and the person he himself was, before. A very sympathetic and human instinct/trap to fall into when touched by trauma, I think, if only it wasn’t backed by godlike power, a fundamentally oppositional personality, and a catastrophic lack of therapy to make it literally everyone else’s problem too lol. It’s varric and solas’ banter about the man on the island and where meaning in a life comes from all over again, writ large and with detail work — and the added idea of ‘what if there are also other islands out there, though. With other people on them that you could find if you reach for each other’. Rook with the best of intentions has to make choices to which there are no perfect outcomes and live with what happens — and not cut themselves off from everyone else around them even when there is regret or shame. You get back up every day and you make a life with other people doing the same and you do your best, and that’s the only victory this world will give you. In the end, that is more than enough, that is essential. And I um. I love that. So much. It’s why some of the writing clumsiness on top can’t hurt me because this thematic spine is so solid and so beautiful to me. It’s DA2 all over again that way for me personally — I forgive this story for what it isn’t and couldn’t be, and I love it with my whole stupid open heart for what it actually is. Thank you for coming to my TED-talk and goodbye etc.      

(For my fellow TLT heads out there — you know what this story is reminding me of most of all, actually? It has some big Nona the Ninth vibes down there in the deep. It’s about… the horror and unspeakable beauty that can only be found in liminality, and the role of love in making that basic fact of existence bearable. And also even more unbearable at the same time. I'm so sorry.)

[momomallowart]

He misses his dad.. 🥺

[starbylers]

You only really need to understand 5 things to know why Byler is happening:

Mike’s arc in season 3 was about pretending to be someone he’s not in the pursuit of “growing up”. It was about kids playing at relationships. This was the only season with focus on the state of M!leven while dating & not separated and it was treated as an immature joke.

Season 4, instead of proving to us why M!leven are right for each other, quite literally does the opposite and shows us nothing except them having awful communication & not finding emotional safety in each other. There is not a single scene between them which is an exception to this.

Meanwhile, Mike and Will are attached at the hip. We see how they resolve conflict maturely and between themselves. We see a strong emotional connection. We see how Mike feels more comfortable being vulnerable with Will than he is with anyone else, and how Will is always always there for him. We see how…

Will’s painting & monologue (aka his romantic love for Mike) soothed Mike’s insecurities and boosted his confidence. It made him ridiculously happy. And being reminded of this lie about El by Will himself ends up being necessary to encourage Mike to go ahead with his “love monologue”, which winds up indirectly causing a literal apocalypse. You cannot make this shit up lmao.

M!leven is entirely framed through Will’s experience. He’s in every scene except their fight, his pain and misery over them is never not the focus. Literally never. We are not seeing the story of M!leven’s love, we are seeing the story of Will’s heartbreak.

Nothing else matters. Like in the most clinical story writing terms, Mike’s character is not going to find out that the person who made him feel the most loved & understood is in love with him and is the one who actually feels all these things about him that just happen to align with exactly what Mike needs to hear to embody the truest and best version of himself, and instead of realising he loves that character back, goes nah I’m good I’ll end up together forever with the person who whilst dating them I became someone I was not and also had terrible self-esteem—oh and also the relationship is insanely immature. It’s that simple. Whether or not Mike currently believes he loves El or currently wants to remain in a relationship is so so so irrelevant. Storytelling doesn’t care what the character thinks he wants, it cares about what the character needs!

[cringefail-clown]

mucha study turned complete self-indulgence as it usually does

[epicfirestormer]

What I love about Hellboy and Abe Sapien's dynamic in the comics is that, if you came into this blind, you'd expect Abe to be the voice of reason or the straight man to Hellboy's impulsive and hotheaded personality. But no, Abe is more often than not the crazy one. Hellboy would deal with fighting evil monsters and bad guys by just sighing and getting it over with, while Abe is going rabid over tearing the creature apart when he does get into a fight. Hellboy acts like it's a 9-to-5 job and will reasonably talk things out with a guy that had nearly killed him before, Abe acts like a madman in a slaughter house and his first instinct is to shoot first kill second and ask third. They're both insane, but on completely different levels.

[puppetmaster13u]

A hint of a continuation of mershark Eyefestation...

I am weak to many eyes, and genuinely Eyefestation already has some siren vibes with the whole mimicking voices and talking in your mind and trying to get you to look/come to it.

Words & Extra Info:

Anatomical left side of the face has eyes clustered closer together than the right side

Anatomical right head-fin is torn, though who knows from what

Layers and rows of sharp teeth, enough that more are breaking through the front of the gums

The hands are anatomically more similar to a whale-fin's bone structure than a human's

Fins similar to pectoral fins on a shark have grown on the arms

If you look at the model there are the beginnings of extra dorsal fins compared to a bull shark

There are more eyes in wounds and the gills as well

The pectoral shape on the humanoid half is formed by extra gills (eyes are closed)

The long hair can act similar to whiskers, alongside covering the green glow of eyes for ambush

Not Visible:

Freckle-like markings on the face that are actually spiracles (a shark's electroreception organ)

How fuckin HUGE this dude is, swamps a lot of things in size actually

How torn the fins actually are due to simplication of sketches lol

[blighted-lights]

slaughterhouse posting part 2 that isn't going to be polished at all and has been sitting in my drafts for days, but this scene is so interesting to me because i genuinely have no idea what megatron wants from ravage in this interaction- and i don't know if megatron knows, either.

megatron starts out by saying that the decepticons' loyalty isn't to him- its to the cause. ignoring how this is immediately striking me as completely, blatently wrong due to the times we see megatron rallying the decepticons around himself when other leaders fail to do the same (nevermind the fact that he started the cause in the first place), he then gets angry with ravage when ravage confirms that- yeah, actually. you're not the cause anymore. we have moved on with someone new. megatron gets so angry he stands up, he looms over ravage, he raises is voice and balls his fist- and why else would he do this if he wasn't upset that they're moving on without him?

which would, of course, make megatron a hypocrite. he left the decepticons and refused to take any effort to rejoin them- he clearly doesn't actually want to return to the fold. but when the decepticons unite themselves and move on from him, it's different. i can abandon you, but you cannot abandon me.

i've always took this reaction as being an immediate, no thinking, gut reaction to finding out the decepticons are moving on without him. he's angry, potentially feeling betrayed by them, when he... doesn't have much of a right to feel that way. and it's not like megatron wasn't given an option to join the decepticons again if that's what he actually wanted.

he was given a choice. he turned it down. he could of turned it down for any number of reasons, but no matter the reason, the point remains that he turned it down.

going back to panel after megatron snaps, ravage clearly takes megatron's outburst as him being upset that they've moved on without him. despite the aggressive way this interaction started with ravage attacking megatron, ravage spends most of this conversation attempting to reassure megatron. megatron gets angry that galvatron took over and they're moving on without him? okay- so then he wants to come back, right? he's upset he's been replaced?

well, galvatron isn't permanent. say the word and you'll be back in charge. megatron says that the decepticons aren't loyal to him, ravage reaffirms that they were loyal to him but now they've chosen a new leader since he left, megatron gets angry that they're moving on without him, and then ravage reinforces their original loyalty to him by saying if he wants to come back, they'll follow him.

and then megatron turns it around; yes he was just angry that the decepticons were no longer loyal to him, but now that same loyalty is toxic, actually. and it is! it absolutely is toxic. but i think ravage backed him into a corner here, even unintentionally. he can't sit down and actually address why the decepticons moving on makes him angry without admitting some part of him wants to return to the cons. or at the very least he still feels possessive of them and doesn't want them to function outside of his influence. when given the option to rejoin, he responds by insulting the decepticon's (and ravage's!) sense of devotion/loyalty and then quickly changes the topic to seawing and the trial. he doesn't say a solid yes or no answer because he doesn't actually have one to give.

ravage nails it down anyways. megatron has no idea what he wants from ravage in this interaction because he doesn't know where he stands anymore, let alone what he wants for himself. before ravage was revealed to be on the lost light, megatron was captain. he even seems content to BE captain- but ravage makes it complicated. ravage is a direct reminder of who he used to be and the people he used to surround himself with. worse, people he's abandoned and hurt in order to get to where he is as captain now. megatron left the decepticons behind with no command structure, no guidance, no plan- and ravage's mere presence is a bitter reminder that even if he's run off to the autobots, he can't escape that.

he's settled into a state of stagmentation with the autobots. one he's content with, maybe- at the very least one he can live with where the guilt isn't as heavy. it is the easiest way out megatron saw for himself.

but if anyone can get him to doubt himself, well.

who else better than ravage to stir up the past?

[camelspit]

younger grady and eda 😔 based on a round of dress to impress with @thefoxysnake

@skylilac

@callas-pancake-tree

@sillyguy-supreme

@steal-nightmares-leave-dreams

@neverseen-nevermore

@abubble125

@purplesoup-lad-le

@gay-otlc

@thefoxysnake

@keeper-of-the-lost-dadwin

@ravs6709

@corruption-exe

@kamikothe1and0nly

@that-glasses-dog

@presidentroarie

@even-if-in-another-time

@nyxpixels

@slozhnos

@katniss-elizabeth-chase

@sofia-not-sophie

@moontoastt

@lemon-girl-in-devil-town

@three-bunnies-in-a-trenchcoat

@purpleunicycle

@just-a-honey-badger

@loverofallthingssmart

@antisocialdork

@tamsong

@cutebisexualmess

@tastetherainbow290

@gayupstraight

@myfairkatiecat

@famousinfamous

@kale-of-the-forbidden-cities

@oroshka

@tw-5

@squishmallow36

@iggydancebreak

@cosmxc-ars3hol3

@amandayetagain

[bloos-bloo]

Oh! Oh look! We have letters!! :D

..You mean direct messages..?

What are.. direct messages? :3c

The performers are now open for questions! <3

HELLO! I ALREADY MADE A POST ABOUT THIS BUT HERES THE OFFICIAL ANNOUNCEMENT! :D I want to explore more of ToyBox in an ask blog format! I feel like this will help me ease some story and give a nice way of having you all interact with the characters! Feel free to send as many asks! Anon or not! This is gonna be funnnn-

SO! GENERAL RULES HERE!

No NSFW asks allowed! If you send any please keep in mind that I will ignore your ask! Depending on the severity I will block you!

Please send asks through my inbox! <3 Comments and reblogs are nice- but it’ll be harder for me to keep track.

PLEASE BE PATIENT WITH ME! I am a disabled artist- I have constant flair ups in my bones right now, and this cold is NOTTT HELPING! On top of that- the holidays are coming! If you’ve sent an ask I will get to it! If you’re pushy I will skip :(

THIS IS FOR FUN! HAVE FUN WITH THIS! Feel free to send anything! Silly stuff or even asking about lore :3c just- be wary on who you ask… Your actions maaayyy have consequences!!

If you’re interested in learning about ToyBox through the snippets I’ve given- feel free to look through the tag or even the introductory post here! <3 I hope this is fun for everyone!

[artharakka]

So, how was your weekend? Rhiam met a shapeshifting god of forests who transed her gender 🌷

[o-berriesandhotsauce]

Gary Operation Blackout brain damage actually intended to be 100% canon. oh my god

(This is from a leak of internal staff documents going around discord right now.)

[puppppppppy]

Tell me about a song you like right now, maybe an animation you just watched that made you think thoughts and feel things

Only Acting by Kero Kero Bonito!! I want to make an animatic for Macaque using this song and some parts of Shadow Play and the s4 special.. although im still mapping it and deciding whether I want to use the radio edit or not lol

[ropebunnykant]

okay i was gonna rb a post with tags about this but i felt mean doing it because it is not just one person saying this but i've seen so many people saying it and i have to make the correction. the heart killers IS NOT AN ADAPTION OF 10 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOU. point blank period, it is not. i know jojo wore the shirt when the trailer dropped, i know he quote tweeted a tweet talking about it, i know he loves the movie, but objectively speaking it is not a 10 things adaptation. jojo himself CALLED IT a shakespeare adaption and it is VERY OBVIOUSLY more based on taming of the shrew than it is 10 things. i can count on one hand the amount of parallels and direct references that there have been to 10 things in the show, whereas there have been DOZENS of DIRECT and EXPLICIT references to taming of the shrew, as well as many smaller and subtle references. this is not a "based on based on" situation. it is based on taming of the shrew, point blank period.