#we both said we’d go this Friday and then texted each other immediately remembering we had other commitments lol :’)

[e77y]

Made a friend at poetry club!!! We talked about fan studies, creative writing, etc. and we are gonna join another writing club together 😎

[crgirlsworld]

Always curious about other people’s take on soulmates. I don’t expect anybody to read this but if you do plz leave your input lol I don’t even wanna know how many words this is I’m sorry in advance

I totally believe in them and the concept of fate/red string theory & all that shit, & I’ll tell you why.

I met a guy for the first time 11 years ago, I was l was literally 12. He’s actually related to one of my old best friends, and I was staying at her house & he had a basketball game they happened to be going to, so I had to go too. The irony is that staying with her was total our if the moment & I was close to never meeting him that first time.

Anyway, he’s 14, a freshman in high school at a different school so ofc I think he’s cute as fuck and he made me laugh so hard when we went to eat dinner that night. I didn’t see him again for almost 3 years because there was really no reason for me to cross paths with him.

Fast forward to the beginning of basketball season of my freshman year & his junior year. He’d ended up moving to my school at the beginning of that year, but he was an upperclassman so I wouldn’t ever have a reason to cross a genuine path with him. Anyway, the basketball coach was my biology teacher and was seriously my favorite teacher in all 4 years of hs, so I was talking to him between games & this guy walks up mid conversation and just joins in like he’s known me my whole life and I’m ofc like 🙄🙄 your ruining my conversation mister but like the way he SMILED at me I can still fucking remember to this day.

I was actually planning to leave before his game but I ended up staying and me being a #boldgirl I slid into his fb messages and tell him that he played good and that it was good talking to him & we talk for a bit & he goes on to say ‘I hate using messenger, text me’ and gives me his number. Plz you can’t even imagine the fan girl I fangirl’d.

Anyway, we talked every day. Used every excuse to text about literally anything. I was at color guard practice one day & we practiced right outside of the gym where the guys were practicing basketball & they walk in our area to the water fountains and he looks at me and winks and I 🫠 all of the girls saw it too and were like AHHHHH with me and my face was so fucking red LMAOOOO

Biggest problem with us and the only reason we didn’t end up together was because he had commitment issues. He’d had a long term girlfriend that he wasn’t with anymore that he was still hooked on because she liked to string him along (I still want to punch her in her throat and she’s married now).

I ignored every 🚩🚩🚩 known to man because I was genuinely falling head over heels in love with the guy. He pulled me every which way, making me think he felt the same before immediately retracting. He talked to a couple of different girls during times where we’d fight but it always came back to us it seemed like. (Even said coach from the first game could see it)

Track season came around and I was at every meet and we hung out every Thursday for the entire day. Thursdays are my favorite day of the week, to this day.

Friday nights we would both usually be at home, talking to each other and watching movies separately but together. We talked one night for hours. We texted watching Forrest Gump, then The Notebook & then he called me to tell me he wasn’t going for all to me anymore because of how it ended. Then we stayed on the phone and watched the most terrible low budget horror movie ever. We were both pretty tired by then, so it was no surprise when he fell asleep during the second horror movie but like THAT ONE WAS SO MUCH SCARIER but I didn’t want to turn it off because I wanted to tell him all about it the next day.

The next year he graduated. He was dead set on going into the Coast Guard and his mom included me in everything. Telling him goodbye before he was basically unreachable while he was at basic was literally crippling. We went from talking every day to not talking for twelve weeks.

After basic he gets stationed in Maryland, (for ref im in Texas) & it sucked because he was so far away but FUCK I MISSED HIM. We started FaceTimeing at this point. My sleep schedule was absolutely fucked, because I’d stay awake with him while he was on duty until he made me go to sleep at three in the morning, because I still had school.

The first time I ever truly felt like my heart had gotten ripped out of my chest was when I was 17. (Two years post re meeting him) he was my best friend. I was beginning to accept that was all we’d ever be, but I’d also never had to see him with another girl. He always told me that he wasn’t in the right place to date.

So tell me why this mother fucker brings a girl he’d been talking to from our town to a party he knew I’d be at. Literally all of the air left my body when they walked in. Anyway, he brought one of his friends from the CG home while he was visiting, and me being petty, decided I’m going to flirt with this guy all night. Tell me why boy gets jealous and is a total cockblock all night.

I start talking to this new guy I’d met at my new job, and we hit it off pretty well, but I’m still regularly texting my situationship, never fully getting past everything. We were in kind of an awkward place though because he’d really fucked with my emotions.

Things are beginning to get pretty serious with work guy, who soulmate guy had no idea about, but anyway. Soulmate guy calls me up one day and I answer it cause it’s what I always did. He’s like “hey can we talk?” & im like o gr8 what could possibly go wrong. Mind you, this is a couple of weeks before he’s getting ready to move closer to home. Then he’s like “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking and I realize how absolutely stupid I’ve been. You’ve been the only person constantly there for me the last 3 years and I really took that for granted. I really want to give us a shot.” And I basically ghosted him.

He tried to make plans for me to come to dinner at his mom’s and I was pretty shady about it, not wanting to straight out say I was seeing someone because I was so fucking scared to close that door in my life.

Move forward to now, he’s got a wife and two kids and seems mostly happy but who am I to say for sure, anymore? We talk occasionally, but we cross paths often. Usually it feels like no time has past.

On my 22nd birthday he texts me and tells me happy birthday & I was like oh wow you remembered & he’s like I tell you every year and I’m like shut up but it’s true because even if we weren’t talking on a regular basis he’s always made sure to tell me happy birthday. He happened to ask me if I ever thought about what life would’ve been like if I’d agreed to try things with him and I didn’t hesitate in telling him that I thought about it every day. He tells me that he was stupid in high school and acted like he wasn’t in love with me when he was & when I tell you that, as I’m sitting at my desk at work, my heart rate jumped to 165. Ironically I’ve been prone to palpitations since then lmao

I run into him at work events in the community & my stomach knots every time he stops to talk to me. I’ll think about him and run into him at the store in the same day.

I write about him like this because he was my first muse & he got me into writing. I write about him like this because I’ve never gotten over him and he still holds a piece of my heart and I miss him every. fucking. day.

[demon-slayage]

The first time you and Cove Holden get into an argument is when you’re in college

-femme reader

-high affectionate Cove, long term dating

-post step 3

-some mild angst but mostly fluff

-hi I haven’t written anything in years and this just popped out at me. Sorry it can get a little specific I based the sorority stuff on some of my own experiences so it does come from a femme perspective as well as my own experiences in the game w a high affectionate sporty Cove.

-hope you enjoy!

————————-

You opted to go to a university on the opposite side of the state. You generally didn’t come home to visit all that often just because your schedules didn’t always line up that way but you and Cove made it work. He knew this would happen and you tried to make a point of visiting at least once a month. However, you had joined a sorority because you wanted to make more friends. You could tell your longtime boyfriend was a little wary since your high school and friend group was never into partying like Greek life was known for.

Once you made it into the sorority in late fall you were finally able to attend one of these said ragers that Cove was worried about. You partook in some underage drinking and sent your boyfriend a couple of Snapchats of you hanging out with some sisters who he’s seen before as well as some unknown frat brothers. He simply told you to be safe, have a good time, and call him if you needed him. Knowing full well he’d drop everything to come get you if needed. Even though your drive/flight was hours away. You told him you loved him and not to worry.

But knowing Cove thats all he did over the weekend. Then the week after you had to deal with midterms so you were even busier and had less time to chat with your boyfriend as you were busy studying in the library with your friends and sisters. But regardless of that fall break was coming up and you had planned your visit to see Cove after midterms.

You made sure to text Cove to tell him you weren’t going to be as available but you knew he’d be a little sad but understanding knowing how clingy he was. However being in this situation you didn’t have time to focus on that.

Friday rolled around and you’d opted to fly home instead of taking the 5 hour drive. You’d planned it to be a surprise getting there earlier instead of the usual time. You had your moms pick you up from the airport and they smothered you with hugs and kisses once they saw you walk out of the gate.

You told them about how the semester was going and told them about your organization and they were just happy you were home. They took you family condo and you immediately got dressed to surprise your-probably-worried-you-hadn’t texted-him-for-a-bit-boyfriend. You sent him a text you saying were leaving in the morning which was normal but you’d always sent a follow up once you took a stop in your usual road trip.

You made your way to the tropical place restaurant where he worked and had even stopped by a local candy shop to pick up some fudge for him.

You swung the door open with a jingle and you’d somehow caught Cove conveniently at the host podium but unfortunately the moment he saw you he started immediately choking on the water he was drinking. His boss rushed over to check on him and noticed you and started laughing.

They said “Oh Cove, ever the smooth one. Why don’t you go take a long lunch since your partner is back.” They patted him on the back as he was still hacking pretty hard but you could see tears forming his eyes. You were unsure whether they were from being excited to see you or because he was in pain from choking.

You quickly pulled your dying boyfriend outside and let him finish recovering. After clearing his throat a few times he brought you into a big hug. And kissed your face all over.

“I didn’t expect you back so early!”

“I know I flew instead of driving since I wanted to see you so bad since I have more time! Fall break doesn’t end til Wednesday so you’re stuck with me until then.”

He puts a hand to his heart and says “oh what shall I do with you for that long.” He says it with a sly look in his eyes. But you also notice a bit of sadness in his voice but choose not to comment on it. You will later but not when he has to eventually go to back to work.

“So, do you want to eat here or find somewhere else to go. I guess I have a longer lunch but I don’t want to push it.”

You both opt for eating at his workplace but sitting outside around back away from the customers. You quickly fall into your normal conversations and you tell him about the midterms and your initiation into your sorority, telling him for the first time you have a secret he can’t know. He tries to get you to spill jokingly but you won’t budge. You also sense his sadness rising but again you won’t push until you’re in private.

Eventually your hour comes to a close and you tell him you’ll see him at his apartment later. You wave the spare key he gave you when he moved in and start your 15 minute trek back to your home to grab your belongings which you had left with your moms before they dropped you off to see him.

You ran inside and gave them a quick hug, popped over to Mr. Holden’s house to let him know you were back, who was just as shocked and then made your trek to Cove’s one bedroom apartment.

His complex was actually rather close to your family homes, he now had his independence but was still close enough to pop in on both families. You’d appreciated it since you’d stay at both places when you were in town and if Elizabeth was in town you got to stay with Cove. Though there was still a room available it was mostly just a weak excuse but your families never minded.

You opened up the door and inhaled and felt at peace. The citrusy-ocean scent you were used to hit you and made you tear up slightly. You walked your bag to Coves bedroom and then grabbed your entertainment of choice and headed into the living room to wait for him to get back. Since he was working a morning shift you expected him home in about an hour.

While you waited you remembered the fudge bought for him and made sure to grab it and display it on his coffee table.

Like clockwork when the clock struck 3, your tired boyfriend walked inside. All of the exhaustion on his face completely melted away at the sight of you and in two steps, thankful to his long legs he was holding you in his arms. Very enthusiastic for someone who’d already greeted you.

“You just saw me though!”

“I know but I didn’t get to do this earlier” he brought his lips to yours and the world stood still and all felt at peace. After a few moments you broke apart and you motioned to the fudge on the table.

“I bought some of your favorite to surprise you!”

You saw tears start to form in his eyes and then tears started to form in yours and you both hugged each other again before settling in a tangled pile of limbs on the couch.

However you were still aware of the subtle sadness he was giving off and decided now was the best time to bring it up.

“Hey.”

You looked at him with worry and he immediately went wide eyed.

“Hey, what’s wrong?”

“No, you tell me? I could tell you weren’t all there today when I saw you at the restaurant.”

“Oh,” he sighed. “Yeah. I’m sorry. It’s nothing.”

You looked at him and he immediately broke.

“No you’re right, sorry I don’t know why I sometimes do that still, you can read me like an open book.” He pulled you closer.

“I guess I was just feeling a little insecure.”

You were surprised. The Cove Holden. Insecure? You both trusted each other with the utmost care and neither of you had ever done anything warranting an insecurity to rise but you let him continue speaking.

“You looked like you were having so much fun in those photos, but seeing you with all those guys i didn’t know kind of got to me. And then you were busy the whole week, which I know you couldn’t help. But we couldn’t even talk about it and it just weighed on me.”

Oh Cove. You put a hand up to your mouth and tears started to form in your eyes. You pushed your face into his chest then looked up at him. He looked back at you with a deep intense love.

“I’m sorry I didn’t even think about that! Those guys joined their organization around the same time as me so we’d been getting to know each other and since it was the first time we got to drink I wasn’t even really conscious of what was happening! They’re just some good friends.”

At that he seemed to stiffen.

“What do you mean not conscious? You didn’t drink that much you blacked out?”

You were not actually a drinker at all and felt a little stung by his assumption. You weren’t even allowed to drink your entire new member process until you got initiated into the organization either so that was a first and you knew you didn’t pass your limits either.

“No Cove. I didn’t. I was fine, i didn’t mean it that way. I meant that those guys had just become part of my routine. Not that I had blacked out.” Your tone came out a little more hostile than you meant.

He looked away and cleared his throat.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you. I know you’re responsible.”

He looked at you and picked up your hand and started massaging it.

“It’s just with alcohol, I worry about it since we never really drank in high school. You’re free to do that of course! You’re free to do whatever you want I just was worried since I’m not able to be there if anything bad did happen.”

Oh. He was right. It’s not like if you did get sick he’d be right there to be able to hold your hair back. Of course he was concerned. You were living different lives right now and it worried him that he couldn’t be a part of some of your firsts.

“Cove, I’m sorry. I didn’t even think about that. You’re always on my mind that it kind of felt like you’d be able to instantly come to my aid if I needed but you are actually 5 hours away and 3 if you fly.” You smiled sadly at him.

He pressed a kiss to your forehead.

“I trust you I really do, you know that but I’ve been realizing it’s hard for me at times watching you live this different life than me after we spent 10 years doing the same thing. I’ve never felt that insecurity before. In the back of my head I worry you’ll get bored of your boyfriend from your small hometown and want to move on to different things.”

You sighed at that, but not with any malice.

“Cove James Holden. You know you are the only one for me. Like you said, I’ve been with you for 10 years! You’re not getting rid of me that easily! And I’d never get bored of you!”

That elicited a chuckle and you pressed your lips to his cheek and then his lips.

Once you pulled apart he stayed looking at you with a soft gaze.

“I want you to have fun, have the whole college experience. I know you won’t always have time to talk to me. Thank you for sticking with me and riding out these insecurities I feel. You are my person and I know I’m yours.”

“Exactly! You are my absolute person.” You replied happily. Poking him in the chest.

“I love you,” he said as he pressed another kiss to your forehead.

“I love you two Cove Holden. Forever and always.”

——

Bonus:

You then spent the rest of the evening cooking dinner, catching up, and eventually having the nicest, deepest sleep you’re had in a while being back in the arms of your boyfriend. He had taken the weekend off so you didn’t even need to worry about waking up early in the morning.

When the sun peaked through the blinds you smiled up at the sleeping beauty who’d encased you protectively in his arms all night knowing someday you’d be doing this every day for the rest of your lives.

[delos-mio]

Out Of The Woods - college!AU - PART 3

A/N: I’m partial to this chapter, but perhaps that’s just me. I’ve not gotten a lot of feedback on this series sooooo idk if I’m just sharing it for me at this point lol but I’m having fun and that’s what matters, right?! Anyways I’m always around for thoughts, feelings, questions!

Only an essay, a few chapters of reading, and a couple shifts at work separated you from your hang out with Nikolai. You found yourself wondering what he was up to, what made him smile that day, what he’d look like on top of you now. That last one tended to linger a minute before you violently shook it from your head. You hardly knew each other anymore, not to mention you had a boyfriend- you couldn’t let yourself start to fantasize about him like that. But he was so sweet and gentle, so sassy and smart. It didn’t hurt that he was still painfully handsome either.

You were sitting at work, more or less twiddling your thumbs, when you felt a buzzing against the white countertop of the receptionist desk you sat behind. When you looked at the screen, an unknown number appeared. You unlocked your phone and opened your texts. Seeing the first line preview made your heart leap into your throat immediately.

N: Hey it’s Nik. Just thought you should have my number too :)

Y: Hey there you glad you didn’t lose that paper

N: I could never! What are you up to?

Y: Just at work, pretty slow today so I’m kinda bored

N: Hopefully I can keep you a little company. Where do you work?

Y: John Richard Salon- it’s that one downtown across from that hot dog place

N: Oh yeah! Seen it a million times. Do you do hair? Is that a secret talent of yours?

Y: God no lol I’d be horrible at it. I don’t have the dexterity for it. I’m just their receptionist

N: “Just” please I’m sure you’re their best employee

You stopped to roll your eyes, but also couldn’t stop the heat from rising on your cheeks.

N: Do you like it?

Y: It’s pretty good for a low responsibility job- it pays the bills too so I’m not complaining

N: That always helps

Your name had been called from off to your side, making your head snap up and you locked eyes with Deja, who was easily your favorite coworker. “And just what has you smiling like an idiot? Hm?” she asked with a smirk and leaned across the counter from you.

“Remember that guy I was telling you about from the party?”

“Oh yeah, the one you fucked in high school?” she teased.

You let out a long sigh. “Well, he just texted me. We’re supposed to hang out on Friday,” you said confidently, raising your chin in her direction to show her there was nothing of consequence going on between you and Nikolai.

“Hang out. Is that what they’re calling it these days?” Deja looked at you with a raised eyebrow and you could only respond with a look of your own.

“Oh my god, shut up,” you laughed. “Seriously. We haven’t hung out in years and it’s nice to have someone to hang out with who knows me. And wants to hang out with me,” you added under your breath.

“Don’t tell me Matt is back on his bullshit…”

You simply raised your thumb and index finger just slightly apart, squinting at the space between them.

As you were catching her up on the last week, John walked over and flipped over the open sign, locking the glass door in front of him. You took that as your sign to help clean up so you could get out of there as soon as possible. The girls all pitched in, sweeping up the few stray clumps of hair on the old wooden floor and wiped down all the counters for the morning.

While you were on the bus for the short ride back to your apartment, you suddenly remembered the conversation you were having with Nikolai before you closed up shop. You cursed under your breath and pulled out your phone again, quickly thumbing a message back.

Y: Sorry! I got caught up closing

N: No sorry needed, you were at work after all

Y: lol I suppose that’s true. They don’t pay me to sit around and look pretty

N: They should

Y: Oh god lol stop

N: Have I told you that I’m really looking forward to Friday?

Y: No but I’m looking forward to it too

You had since made it home and crawled into bed, happy to finally be off your feet and talking to the boy who disarmed you with a single smile. For the next few hours, the two of you texted back and forth, mostly about classes and work, but you couldn’t stop yourself from occasionally flirting with Nikolai. You really needed to work on actively not doing that, but you allowed yourself one last evening of toying with him. When the clock rolled over to 1am, the lids of your eyes were beginning to grow heavy and a long yawn escaped from your lips.

Y: I think I’m going to fall asleep on you I’m sorry

N: Holy shit I didn’t realize it was so late

N: I should get to bed too. I have a presentation in the morning

Y: Don’t let me keep you up!

N: But darling that’s all I want ;)

N: Sweet dreams- I’ll see you Friday

Y: Goodnight Nik

-----

Friday finally came and you were nervous as you fixed your hair one last time in the wide bathroom mirror. You opted for tight jeans, a pretty low cut tank, and a zip up hoodie. There was no way you were going to just hang out at his house looking like you were ready for the club, but you still wanted to remind Nikolai that you were cute. Genya had already left for the night, so you weren’t able to have a second set of eyes give your outfit the final approval; you could really use the reassurance right about now. As you casually boosted your chest one more time, there was a light knock at the front door. You opened it to Nikolai in a skin-tight tee for your school and a light canvas jacket. His hair was perfectly disheveled and his jeans clung tight to his thick thighs. You caught him giving you a long onceover before giving you a wide smile.

“You look amazing,” he breathed out, pulling you in for a tight embrace. You let your hands wander over his broad back, exploring the pull of his muscles under his jacket.

“You don’t look so bad yourself,” you smirked as you pulled apart. You locked up behind you and let Nikolai walk you downstairs and out to his car.

“Pizza?” he asked, one hand low on your back, the other gesturing vaguely you assumed in the direction of the car.

“I thought you’d never ask,” you smiled from ear to ear. Immediately, you could see the tension leave Nikolai’s shoulders. As you stepped foot into the parking lot, the sky decided it was the perfect time to open up and unleashed a sheet of rain unlike any you’d had so far this fall. You yelped as it began to pour, throwing your hood over your head. Nikolai acted quickly and threw off his jacket, holding it high above your head to keep you dry as you both splashed quickly to his car. This gesture made your heart swell; you were starting to think Nikolai may be a real lift knight in shining armor. He opened your door and made sure you were out of the rain before joining you and whipping his soaked coat in the backseat. You were both laughing at the situation and he was visibly relieved that you took the whole hiccup in stride. “Let’s get fucking dry ,” you laughed and he needed no further request to set off in the direction of his apartment.

Nikolai actually didn’t live too far from you, you realized when he pulled up across the street from the brown duplex. It was still raining when you parked and you again sprinted to the front porch in a desperate attempt to stay a little dry. When you got close to the door, you realized that it was a lot louder inside than you thought it would be. Nikolai must have noticed too because his jaw immediately set, irritation flashing behind his hazel eyes.

“Fucking Aleks,” he muttered under his breath before pushing the door open. A large party was taking place, unbeknownst to Nikolai. There were people passing in front of them, a lively game of beer pong in process, and more than one person going through their cupboards. Nikolai gestured for you to head inside and he slammed the door shut behind him. “Do you mind waiting here for just one second? I have to talk to Aleks quick,” he asked quietly into your ear, his hand resting on the side of your face. You nodded and he gave you a small smile before setting off for the kitchen. Aleks was laughing against the fridge with a couple other guys, barely registering it when Nikolai was standing in front of him, arms crossed tight over his chest.

“Dude! I thought you said you were going to the baseball house!” Nikolai scolded.

“Nikolai! I’m so glad you’re here, man. No, we decided to have people over here instead. We’re always at the baseball house,” Aleks smiled, giving Nikolai a friendly punch to his shoulder; Nikolai didn’t budge an inch.

“I kinda had plans here tonight, remember?” he said through gritted teeth, giving a small nod back towards where you stood. Aleks’s face dropped as it all came back to him.

“I am so sorry man, I totally forgot.”

“Obviously,” Nikolai scoffed.

“I mean it. It slipped my mind. I’m really sorry dude.” It was hard for Nikolai to stay mad at Aleks for long, if at all. You saw Aleks give Nikolai a long hug, evidently sorting out whatever disagreement they just had. Nikolai made his way back to you, a little less high strung.

“C’mon,” he said and took your hand, leading you around the corner to a short hallway. He led you into a room and quietly shut the door behind you. The first thing that struck you was all of the maps and works in progress strewn across his desk and hanging on the walls. You walked around in awe and marveled at Nikolai’s decor. He had numerous prints of classic paintings and frescoes, almost all of them related to myths or historical events.

“Nikolai, this is amazing! It’s so,” your head was spinning as you looked at all of his art, “it’s incredible.” You turned back to him and he was right behind you, an amused smile pulling at his lips.

“I’m so sorry. I thought we’d be able to come and spend some time together without 80 other people.” He looked genuinely upset that he couldn’t follow through with his plan of having dinner and talking all night on the couch.

“Hey, it’s ok. We can still hang out. Why don’t we make an appearance, play a game of beer pong or whatever, and then we can watch a movie in here or something?” you offered. Nikolai’s face lifted a little at that and he lightly squeezed your hand, nodding his head in agreement. “I gotta get out of this hoodie, though. It’s fucking soaking,” you laughed.

You shed the wet garment and hung it carefully on the back of one of the chairs near you. Nikolai had changed out of his wet shirt as well; he must have moved in the blink of an eye because you didn’t even notice him switch clothes. When you looked at him again, his gaze was fixed on you, his expression hard to read. “What is it?” you finally asked with a nervous laugh as punctuation.

“You’re so pretty,” he said with a small smile. You looked down at yourself- your hair was a complete rat's nest, shirt and jeans soaked through, and though you hadn’t looked in a mirror you could feel your makeup was a mess too. And here he was, arguably the most handsome man you’d ever met, lost for words as you stood in front of him. You bit down on your bottom lip and shook your head before taking him by the hand and leading him back into the party.

Nikolai grabbed each of you a drink and you wandered together to the beer pong table where Aleks was taking his last shot with his partner. Aleks grinned when he saw the two of you walk up and declared he was playing you next after he ‘kicked their ass’. He sunk the last shot and whooped loudly, high-fiving with his partner. Nikolai took his place on the opposite end of the table with you and re-racked the cups.

“Sorry I’m about to embarrass you in front of your date, Nik,” Aleks smirked arrogantly. Nikolai only bounced the light ball against the table top, catching it swiftly on the back of his long fingers. He repeated the trick, unbothered by Aleks and his shit talking, also not correcting him that you were not in fact on a date.

“We’ll just see about that,” he laughed as his first shot sank directly into the front cup. You giggled with him and took a shot of your own, somehow making another shot. You’d played a few times before, but you didn’t consider yourself skilled by any means- certainly not as skilled as these boys. Nikolai was so proud of you, he threw his arm over your shoulder and pulled you into his side. “Good luck, man.”

Aleks was frustrated as his winning streak began to slip through his fingers. Nikolai was clearly the better player, which was making Aleks crazy, though he had also had about five more drinks than Nikolai. You only made one more shot after your beginner’s luck, but Nikolai didn’t mind at all. He happily carried your team and took care of the remaining cups, always encouraging you when you made a lousy toss. Before long, Nikolai was flicking his wrists high over his head like he was making a free throw and sinking the winning shot. The small crowd around the table cheered and Aleks grumpily crossed his arms. Nikolai gathered you in his arms and lifted you easily off the ground, spinning you with him as you celebrated your very first beer pong victory, all thanks to Nikolai.

“Better luck next time!” you taunted sarcastically and Aleks finally gave you a small smile. The next team in line took your spot and you slid back into the crowd undetected and back to Nikolai’s room. “I didn’t know you were good at every sport,” you teased before taking a seat on the edge of his bed.

“Is beer pong really a sport?” he asked with a raised eyebrow. He walked over to stand in front of you and ran his hand over your finally drying hair. “Movie time?”

“Yes,” you replied simply, possibly a little too quickly. Nikolai smiled at you before walking over to his bed. He pulled back the covers and crawled onto his side of the bed, patting the spot next to him, inviting you in. He had chosen some movie to put on evidently, but you truthfully didn’t notice what. You flicked off the lights and jumped in next to him with a smile. Nikolai laid out on his back and you curled up comfortably on his chest.

“I had a really good time tonight, rain storm and surprise party and all,” he said, his voice low in your ear.

“Me too,” you said with a smile, still distracted by the art on his walls. “What inspired your decor choices?”

Nikolai turned his head to look at the picture of the Minotaur over his desk. “As you know, I’m a history major,” he started. “My concentration is in classical studies, specifically the Hellenistic period.” He rolled his neck to face you again. “That’s actually my favorite myth.”

“You know, for being a creative writing major, my Greek mythology is a little rusty,” you prompted, leveling your most charming smile at Nikolai.

“Would you like me to regale you with the tale?” he asked with a dramatic flourish.

“I’m all ears, Mr. Lantsov,” you laughed, positioning yourself so you could rest your chin on your hands laying on his chest and gaze up at him.

“Alright. So, Minos had just become the ruler of the island of Crete, but was still in competition with his brother for power. He prayed to Poseidon to send him a sign of the god’s favor- a bright white bull. Minos was tasked to sacrifice the bull to honor Poseidon, but he was so enamored with the bull that he decided to keep him, believing Poseidon would accept an alternate sacrifice.” Nikolai absently petted your hair.

“But he didn’t?”

“He did not,” Nikolai laughed. “As punishment, Poseidon made Minos’ wife, Pasipahae, fall in love with the bull.”

“Such a Greek god thing to do.” You smiled up at him.

“Isn’t it?” Nikolai beamed back. “Pasiphae had the master craftsman Daedalus create a hollow, wooden cow for her to climb in so she could mate with the bull. And thus, the Minotaur was created. Pasiphae did her best to nurse and raise the Minotaur as a babe, but he grew too fast and became unruly. Minos consulted the oracle at Delphi on what to do, and as a result commissioned Daedalus to construct a gigantic labyrinth to house the Minotaur under the palace in Knossos.”

“Years go by, and one of Minos’ sons is killed by the Athenians, who I guess were jealous of a string of recent victories by the king. From here, there are a few versions on why Athens begins sending youths as tribute, but the most common is that Minos waged and won a war to avenge the death of his son. As the losers, Minos required the Athenians to send seven youths and seven maidens to be sent every seventh year to cast into the labyrinth to be consumed by the Minotaur.”

“The third sacrifice came around and the hero Theseus,” Nikolai started, contempt clear in his voice, “volunteered to go as a sacrifice to Crete to slay the Minotaur. He told his father, Aegeus, that he would put up a white sail when he came back home if he was successful, but would have the crew put up black sails if he was killed by the Minotaur. Once he was in Crete, Minos' daughter Ariadne fell head over heels for Theseus and helped him navigate the labyrinth. In most versions of the story, she gave him a ball of string so he could retrace his steps and a sword to slay the beast. Story goes that he killed the Minotaur and led the Athenians out of the labyrinth, sailing away with them and Ariadne away from Crete.”

“I’m gathering that you’re not a Theseus fan,” you said, eyes still trained on Nikolai’s face. “Why?”

“A number of reasons.” Nikolai paused, clearly deciding on how much he wanted to nerd out. “One being that on the way back to Athens, Theseus abandoned Ariadne on the island of Naxos. He forgot, however, to put up the white sail like he told his father he would. Aegeus saw the black-sailed ship approach and threw himself into the sea, presuming Theseus was dead. But doing so just secured the throne for Theseus. The other being that he murdered the Minotaur.”

“But didn’t the Minotaur kill a bunch of kids?”

“Or was he fed children after being abandoned by his mother, unaware of any other way to live? I don’t subscribe to the idea that the Minotaur is a monster. There’s also quite a bit of evidence that suggests Ariadne saw him as a brother, having to make the impossible choice of her ‘abomination’ of a brother and a man who had convinced her he was in love with her.” Nikolai spoke with such passion and knowledge that it made your stomach tighten. This was a Nikolai not many got to see, a Nikolai you wanted to hold and kiss and laugh with. Fuck, you were in so far over your head.

He’d never been more attractive to you than in that moment. The light from the TV dancing on his perfect cheekbones, his hazel eyes dark as he spoke. “I don’t know. I have a soft spot for him. I feel like the Minotaur got a raw deal.”

“Well, you’ve made me a believer,” you smiled and the way Nickolai beamed back at you made the heat rise in your chest.

“You should stay here tonight.”

“Nik,” you sighed, rolling off him. “You know I can’t do that.” He had no idea how badly you wanted to just scream out ‘yes’.

“I know, I know,” he conceded, staring straight up at the ceiling. “Really wish you could, though.”

“Someday.”

“Is that a promise?” he asked with an arched eyebrow.

“I’m not the oracle at Delphi,” you said over your shoulder, making him snort. “I can’t tell the future.”

TAGGED: @agentsofsheilds

[miracleonice87]

I’ll Take Care of You, part two

a Tyler Seguin fic

a/n: this one’s from Peyton’s perspective. back in the fall when I first started writing fics again, I wrote part one in first person, which I don’t really do anymore, but I’m keeping that consistent for this one. read part one here first if you haven’t already. 

tw: fainting, mention of miscarriage/loss of pregnancy/infertility/periods

“Unfortunately, it’s not uncommon for this to occur with first pregnancies. It happens more often than you might think. It certainly doesn’t mean you won’t ever be able to have a baby. My rule of thumb is to let couples try to get pregnant again naturally for one year without any intervention. Then, if you’re still having difficulties, you can come back in and we can talk about other options.”

It had been eleven months since my doctor had spoken those words to Tyler and me following the miscarriage that had nearly broken us both.

Those eleven months had seen us try again and again each month with no success. I tracked my body temperature and ovulation cycle each and every day before even leaving bed. I’d completely removed alcohol and caffeine from my diet and monitored everything I put into my body, controlling every single factor I could possibly control.

And yet, on the thirteenth day — the unluckiest of days for multiple reasons — of each month, like clockwork, my period arrived. If Tyler was at home when it happened, I simply left the bathroom with a sorrowful shake of my head, curling into his waiting arms as he comforted me silently, holding me close, disappointment weighing heavily on us both. If he was on the road, I texted him only a “🔴” symbol, indicating that my monthly visitor had shown up unwelcome yet again. He replied each time with an, ”I’m sorry, sweetheart,” though he had nothing at all to apologize for.

My patience and determination, along with Tyler’s, were wearing thin. It was feeling more and more impossible to keep the faith — more and more unlikely that this would happen on its own.

I had all but given up hope.

But then...

The eleventh month arrived, and the thirteenth day of it came and went with no sign of my cycle. And then the fourteenth day. And then the fifteenth.

And with that, the smallest sliver of hope glimmered from out of the darkness in the depths of my heart.

But I wouldn’t allow myself to get too excited. With Tyler on a road trip to the East Coast, I barely slept those three nights, tossing and turning and wondering if I should take one of the numerous tests stuffed in the bathroom cabinet.

On the sixteenth, after Tyler had already left for morning skate, I decided it was time. Though I knew I couldn’t do it alone, I also couldn’t stomach the thought of waiting for Ty to return — let alone the thought of seeing his disappointment in the event of yet another negative test.

Thankfully, though, the sixteenth was a Friday — the day that Fanny, Klinger’s fiancée, and I had long ago set aside for morning yoga in my home gym. Fanny, now six months pregnant herself with her and John’s first baby, would arrive at 10 a.m., and I decided that that was as good a time as any to find out what was next for Ty and me — we would either finally start the family we’d always wanted, or it would be time for a different approach.

After greeting one another and stretching over small talk, Fanny carefully broached the topic that I had brought to her, heartbroken, so many times in the past year.

“So how have you been feeling?” she inquired gently from the mat next to mine, bending to the side for a new pose. “Are you on your cycle?”

From where I stood with my arms extended straight out, my face turned away from hers, I pulled my bottom lip between my teeth and pondered what to say next.

“Well,” I began before clearing my throat, “That’s, um... I actually wanted to talk to you about that.”

You pivoted to face Fanny, her pretty eyes now wide as saucers. Slowly, she stood up straight.

“Stop it,” Fanny whispered incredulously, joy etched in her expression.

I shrugged a bit. “I’m late,” I admitted softly. “But only by three days. And I haven’t taken a test-“

“Peyton!” Fanny warned through her giggles, hands finding her hips. “You have to!”

I smiled, appreciating my dear friend’s excitement for me while still feeling the familiar tightness of anxiety in my gut.

“I will,” I promised. “I seriously told myself I was gonna wait to do it while you were here. I couldn’t do it alone and I... if I’m not... well, I just can’t bear to see Ty’s reaction again…”

Fanny nodded solemnly. “Oh, sweetie. I understand,” she assured. “Maybe after we finish up? Or not. I mean, we can do it whenever you feel ready.”

I nodded, suddenly feeling overheated and attributing it to my frayed nerves.

“God, is it hot in here?” I asked, unzipping my lightweight jacket and throwing it aside, still fanning myself though I now wore only a sports bra and athletic shorts.

Fanny frowned, looking at my reflection in the mirrored wall in front of us. “No, I feel fine,” she said.

I tied my ponytail into a high bun to get the hair off my neck, noting a faint ringing in my ears as I placed my feet in position on the mat once more.

As I reached down for my toes, the ringing grew louder, and I suddenly saw stars in my vision.

With trembling hands, I wiped the sweat from my now-dripping brow and stood straight up, but apparently too quickly, as the room around me quickly fell from focus, darkness taking its place.

“Fan... I-I don’t feel good...”

Alarmed at the weakness of my voice, Fanny turned to face me and gasped.

“Babe, oh my god!” she exclaimed — the last thing I heard before everything faded to black.

_____

The next thing I heard as I came to was my husband’s voice, which sounded distant and faint. I moaned, squinting at the bright fluorescent lights above me as I realized that I was lying on my back on the floor, with Tyler’s face inches above mine. I opened my eyes slowly and heard him draw a deep breath, announcing, “She’s awake.”

I felt him cup my cheek tenderly as I offered a weak smile.

“Hi,” he breathed, relief heavy in his tone. “Hi, sweet girl. You scared us pretty good.”

“What happened?” I asked, confused by the hoarseness of my own voice. I moved to prop myself up on my elbows, but Tyler gently pushed my shoulders flat once more.

“Shh, shh, hey, don’t get up,” he instructed. “You passed out while you and Fanny were working out. Do you remember that?”

With a furrowed brow, I nodded. I saw Fanny standing behind Tyler, covering her lips with her fingers as she stared at me nervously.

“Oh god, Fan, I’m so sorry,” I murmured, still feeling weak and shaky.

Fanny shook her head and took a couple of steps forward, standing over Tyler’s shoulder. “Babe, no, don’t apologize,” she insisted. “I was just worried about you. Tyler came in the door just a minute after it happened but I had already called 911. I just didn’t know what else to do. I’m sorry.”

I nodded, my eyes fluttering closed once more. “That’s okay,” I said softly.

Just then, there was a knock at the door upstairs, and Fanny hurried up the steps to answer it. I rolled my head to look at Tyler, who stared down at me with deep concern.

“You’re gonna be okay, baby,” he promised, pushing some hair from my still-damp forehead. “We’re gonna get you checked out and see what’s going on, okay?”

I nodded as I heard footsteps coming back down the stairs, and two paramedics followed Fanny to where I lay, still on my yoga mat.

“Hey there,” one of them smiled. “I’m Maria, and this is my partner, Chris. You’re Peyton?”

I nodded as Maria knelt beside me, opposite Tyler, with Chris placing a medic kit on the floor next to him.

“Well, it’s nice to meet you, Peyton,” Maria said kindly. “How are you feeling right now?”

I cleared my throat, attempting to blink the fog away.

“Not as bad as I did a few minutes ago,” I half-joked. “But I still feel shaky, and hot.”

Maria nodded, pressing the stethoscope to my chest.

“Can you tell me what you’ve had to eat and drink today?” she asked.

“Um... I had two cups of coffee, a yogurt... and some water during yoga,” I replied.

“Okay,” Maria said as Chris took my pulse, with Tyler holding tight to my other hand and watching their every move. “Any history of fainting before this?”

I shook my head. “No, never,” I said.

“Any blood sugar issues? Diabetes, hypoglycemia?”

“No, nothing.”

“Are you currently on your period?”

My cheeks warmed. This certainly wasn’t the way I had planned to tell Tyler of our latest development.

“Um, n-no,” I admitted sheepishly, glancing at him. I could see the wheels beginning to turn in his mind even as he watched the paramedics instead of me.

“Any chance you could be pregnant?” Maria asked gently as she folded her stethoscope into her bag and reached for a blood pressure cuff.

Shit.

“Uh… actually, yeah.”

Immediately, Tyler’s head snapped toward me.

“Wait, what? Really?” he inquired, joy exuding from his whole being.

I simply shrugged, beaming. “I’m late.”

A small, knowing smile crossed Maria’s face. She wrapped the cuff around my arm and began to squeeze the pump.

“Okay, well, that could be the reason,” Maria noted. “Sometimes when you’re early in a pregnancy, your body might not be getting all the extra rest and nutrients and hydration it needs. It happens sometimes, and often, it’s no big deal.”

I nodded, reaching for Tyler’s hand.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” I said with a scrunched nose. “I just didn’t want to get my hopes up, let alone yours.”

Tyler brought my hand to his lips and kissed my knuckles.

“It’s okay,” he told me with a shake of his head. “I get it.”

I smiled gratefully, and Maria removed the cuff from my arm.

“Your blood pressure is a little low, which doesn’t surprise me,” she said. “Again, this can happen. Just to be safe, I wanna take you to the hospital for an EKG and monitor you for a bit, and we’ll do a pregnancy test there too, okay?”

I nodded, looking to Tyler for reassurance.

“It’s okay,” he said, knowing exactly what I needed to hear. “I’ll be right there with you.”

_____

One ambulance ride later, with Tyler beside me and Fanny following behind in my car, I had arrived at the emergency department and was being poked and prodded and hooked up to a plethora of monitors. A cardiologist soon confirmed that everything was fine with my heart, and my pregnancy test was then the only result that hung in the balance.

I sat propped up on pillows in the hospital bed, Tyler standing at my side as we waited in silence.

Out of nowhere, tears formed in my eyes, and I tried to swipe at them without Tyler noticing — a futile attempt. When he heard my faint whimper, he stepped closer and gathered me into his arms, kissing the top of my head.

“Hey, hey,” he spoke softly. “What is it, baby?”

“I’m scared, Ty,” I whispered, head buried in his chest. “Whether it’s positive or negative. I’m just scared.”

“I know, babe,” he replied, slowly caressing my back. “It’s okay to be scared. I’m scared, too. You’ve been through hell.”

“We’ve been through hell,” I corrected, sniffling as I looked up at him. Tyler nodded and smoothed his thumb along my jaw.

“We just have to believe that everything is gonna work out this time,” he told me as he kissed my forehead. “Good things are coming, Peyt. I can feel it.”

After several more minutes, my nurse, a sweet woman named Beth who spoke with a thick Texas accent, entered the room holding my chart. I could actually hear my own heartbeat in my ears, this time not because I felt faint, but because I was overwhelmed with anticipation.

“Well, Miss Peyton…” Beth began with a smile. “Congratulations. You’re gonna be a mama.”

I let out a sob and covered my mouth with my hand immediately, and Tyler choked out a breathless laugh. His hands grasped my face as he kissed me firmly.

“You hear that? We’re having a baby,” he whispered, eyes glossy with tears. “God, I love you so much.”

I giggled excitedly. “I love you, too, baby daddy,” I replied, causing Tyler to chuckle, too.

As Beth looked on with a grin, she wrote a few things down on my chart, then said, “Congratulations, you two. I’ll give you some privacy. Peyton, honey, we’ll be back around to check on you in about half an hour, okay?”

I nodded, tears streaking my face. “Yes, yes, thank you,” I spoke. “Thank you so much.”

With a kind nod, she left the room, pulling the sliding glass door closed behind her.

Before the door was even shut, Tyler’s lips found mine once more, his fingers holding my cheeks reverently. Eventually, I pulled away for a breath.

“You were right,” I told him, nudging his nose with mine.

Still completely giddy, he asked with a smile, “What was I right about?”

I reached a hand up to work my fingers through his curls. “You told me good things are coming,” I reminded, voice quivering. “You were right.”

Tyler was overcome with emotion once again and wrapped his arms around my shoulders. For the longest time, we stayed that way, embracing with only the sounds of soft, happy cries filling the room.

_____

eight months later...

“Are you the most handsome little man in the whole wide world? Hmm? I think so,” Tyler spoke to the tiny baby he held in his arms. “I think you’re just the most beautiful boy I’ve ever seen.”

I smiled from my hospital bed, feeling more exhausted and more in love than I ever knew I was capable of.

“And it’s a good thing you look like your mommy,” Tyler added, smirking at me before kissing the baby’s forehead — our baby’s forehead. “Uncle Jamie is gonna say that too. Yes, he is. I might as well beat him to it, huh?”

I chuckled, patting the mattress beneath me and gesturing for Tyler to join me.

“Bring him back over here,” I pleaded. “I miss him already.”

Tyler hummed knowingly and rose from his chair, carefully cradling the baby in his arms.

“I know,” he said. “I miss him, too, and I’m literally holding him. How is that possible?”

I smiled. “Because having kids means your heart walks around outside of your body,” I spoke, kissing our boy’s chubby cheek as Tyler took his place on my bed. “That’s what my grandmother used to say.”

He nodded. “You’re damn right,” he said, shaking his head. “I feel it already. I never knew it was possible to feel this way, Peyt. As bad as we wanted a baby, as much as it hurt when we lost the first one...” Tyler choked up as he spoke of the loss we’d experienced now almost two years ago. After a pause, he continued. “I still just never thought it would feel this incredible.”

I curled my hands around his arm and kissed his bicep. “Me either,” I admitted airily. “I’ll never forget the pain we felt then. And that baby will always be our first. But this... this is the best day of my life.”

Tyler beamed, wrapping one arm around my waist while cradling the baby to his chest with his other.

“So, are we decided on this little man’s name?” Tyler asked as I touched the baby’s pouted lips, making us both giggled at his expression.

“I think so,” I confirmed, leaning my head against his shoulder. “Are you still thinking what I’m thinking?”

Tyler looked down at me with hooded eyes, full of adoration, and nodded. “If you’re sure,” he spoke.

I’d been sure for a few months now, since the first day that I allowed myself to browse a baby name book, still riddled with fear of the unknown, while also waiting expectantly and with hope for our new journey ahead. I didn’t get far, only to the B’s, when I found the perfect name... one that meant blessed. 

As I peered down at the boy in my arms, no name seemed more fitting than that one I’d whispered into being long ago. 

“I’m sure,” I replied confidently. I cradled the baby’s head in my hand and pressed my lips to his forehead. “Welcome to our world, Bennett Tyler Seguin,” I whispered, overjoyed and humbled to finally have the privilege of having a son to name not only for his daddy, but also for the precious, long-awaited gift he was to us.

“Our boy,” Tyler whispered reverently.

[ateezmakemeweep]

wooyoung x jealous!reader

word count: 9k

angst (warning: infidelity)

request

you had always trusted your intuition. because while you weren’t very book smart, just getting by with b’s and c’s in most of your classes, you found it incredibly easy to read people. 

their eyes were always a dead giveaway. whether they were able to look you in the face or not, if they were twinged with happiness and amusement or tight with fear and apprehension. 

wooyoung’s eyes were the thing that first caught your attention, the older boy you’d seen so many times in the hallways or in the cafeteria laughing with his friends or looking around happily. but on this one particular day, he plopped down next to you during lunch and completely caught you off guard.

“hey,” he said casually, like this wasn’t the first time he’d ever spoken to you or acknowledged your existence. you looked at him warily, smiling in confusion as you waved at him hesitantly. 

“hi.”

“you’re cute,” he told you bluntly, smiling in a way you know should be getting your heart and stomach fluttering. but you couldn’t help but feel skeptical of the boy, raising your eyebrow at him in confusion. 

“okay...” you said, the smirk on his face at the hesitation in your voice far too handsome and charming. 

“usually, someone would say oh, thank you or you too,” he says, his eyes widening playfully as his eyebrows shoot up teasingly. but you don’t want any part in what he’s trying to offer you, knowing far too well an older boy like him wouldn’t want anything other than...fun with you. and that’s not something you can offer him. 

“i didn’t ask for the compliment,” you say, feeling yourself grow more defensive and snippy as he leans in closer to you. like he’s becoming more and more enticed at the way you dismiss him. “why are you even talking to me?” 

“why are you trying to not talk to me?” he counters, cocking his head to the side as his eyes pierce yours. it makes you unbearably nervous, how confident and sure he can stare at you without the slightest bit of hesitation. “i wanna get to know you.”

“why?”

his lips quirk to the side like he knows he doesn’t really have an answer for you that would make sense. just that anytime he’s seen you around school, he’s been intrigued by you. he likes that you seem just as comfortable alone as you do with other people, how you always make sure to throw out all your wrappers and that you take the same routes everyday. 

he can’t quite pinpoint it, he just likes something about you.

“because i have a feeling we’d be good for each other.”

and to this day, after nine months of dating, you still don’t know how he knew that. he had sat with you everyday that first month, getting to know you and watching you slowly open up to him. it had taken a bit longer than he initially thought but once it happened, you both saw he was right. 

you had a natural chemistry and banter that only certain people had, something innate within the both of you bringing you closer and closer. he had asked you on a date one friday afternoon, suggesting to wear something comfortable and that he’d pick you up at six. 

it had been the most chaotic first day of your life, a bizarre restaurant where you were blindfolded while you ate your meal followed by skating hand in hand at a roller rink. you both left with bruises littering your knees and hands, something very unsuspecting for a first date.

“i didn’t anticipate what a shit show that was gonna be,” he told you honestly when he dropped you home, walking you to your front door as you giggled; that was the best word to describe the evening. 

but it had also been one of the best nights of your life, his contagious laugh and smile only making you laugh harder and smile wider. and when he asked you to be his girlfriend at your doorstep, he only continued to make you the happiest girl alive.

you couldn’t believe he had spent his senior with you. took you to his prom and after-prom in the mountains, got you a ticket to his graduation and showed you off proudly to his family, took you to every party that his fellow classmates had and always made sure you felt comfortable and included. 

but you guys also talked about the elephant in the room, the fact that he’d be attending a college over an hour away while you stayed here to finish your last year of high school.

“what are we gonna do?” you asked one night, laid out on a blanket as you looked up at the sky. stargazing was something you guys had always done, doing it on a whim one night before it turned into a weekly date night activity. 

he rolled over and held himself up on his elbow, reaching out to smooth out your hair as he looked over your face. “what do you mean?” he asked softly. and when you turned to him with tears in your eyes, he immediately took you in his arms. 

“baby, what’s wrong?” he cooed. the night had been going fine, all smiles and laughs as you ate your incredibly unhealthy fast food under the night sky. 

“i don’t wanna break up,” you whimpered against him, your hands fisting his grey sweatshirt as you hid your face in his neck. he pressed a kiss to your head, bringing a hand to your back as he rubbed up and down soothingly. 

“who said anything about breaking up, my love?” he cooed, the term of endearment causing your stomach to swoop. he had just started calling you that after he told you he loved you a few weeks ago, remembering the way he looked at you so sweetly when he confessed those words.

“i-i just assumed you wouldn’t wanna be with your high school girlfriend in college,” you say quietly against him. “it would make sense, i guess, so i can’t say i blame you but-”

he brings your face to his as he places a firm kiss on your lips, melting into you as he palms your cheek softly. you kiss him back immediately, feeling your heart break at the thought of never being able to do this again. 

“i don’t know why you’re thinking like that,” he mumbles once he pulls back, running his hand through your hair before tucking the strands behind your ear. “but get those thoughts out of your head. i’m not breaking up with you, baby. in case you forgot, i just told you i loved you the other day.”

“i know but-”

“but what?” he asks with a smirk, pushing you down on your back and rubbing the stray tear off your cheek. “you think i just say shit to say it?”

“no, but-”

“then stop. i’ll tell everyone at college i have a high school girlfriend and they won’t have shit to say about it.”

you giggle softly at his tone and then even more when he tickles your sides, your screeching causing him to smile and bend down to kiss you again. it’s a night you think you’ll always remember, a night that really solidified your relationship and made you put 100% of your trust in him. 

it’s why now, as you help him move into his college dorm, you have not a single feeling of doubt or anxiety. you told each other you’re gonna alternate weekends, him driving to you or you driving to him on weekends you’re both free of school or sport obligations. 

his roommate mingi was a tall, intimidating boy who the second his mouth opened you took a liking too. he was bouncy and happy and loud and him and wooyoung got on a little too well. you were concerned about the wellbeing and ears of everyone in the dorm, seeing how playful and friendly the boys were with each other already.

you had left to go home with a parting kiss on your lips and his lowly mumbled “i’ll see you soon, baby,” in your ear, his words immediately sending excitement through you. because you hadn’t even left and you were already so eager to see him again. 

and for the first two months, everything had been great. you texted and facetimed everyday, he went to you and you went to him and he made you feel as welcomed at the college parties as he did at the old high school ones he’d take you too. 

but then your first inkling that something didn’t feel right was at a halloween get together at his friend’s frat house. hongjoong was the type of a guy you think most college girls longed for: attractive and alluring but extremely unattainable. wooyoung had introduced him as one of mingi’s best friends, the small group of men as nice as they were handsome. 

there had even been a few girls, all of them either friends or lovers of the boys, who welcomed you with open arms and took you under their wing. but then there was one girl who the second you met her, she rubbed you the wrong way. 

“lisa!” one of them said, grabbing a pretty girl with black hair and bringing her over to you. “this is y/n. wooyoung’s girlfriend!” 

“ahh this is the high school girl he always talks about,” she says excitedly, her voice high and nasally as she brings you in for a friendly, gentle hug. “nice to finally meet you.”

“you too,” you smile. “are you one of the guys girlfriends?” 

she smirks at your question and something about it unnerves you, the way her pretty lips pull up and her eyebrows raise causing you to cave in on yourself. 

“nope, no boyfriend for me,” she says. “but i’m hoping to find one....soon.” you watch her eyes travel toward wooyoung and his group of friends, you heart twinging with the slightest bit of insecurity and fear, before she looks back at you. “how long have you and woo been together?”

your eyes narrow at the nickname but you shake it off, smiling at her as you tell her it’ll be a year next month.

“aw, how exciting! that’s a long time for people so young.”

you choke out a laugh as you nod your head, watching her eyes filter over to wooyoung and his friends again. she really is one of the prettiest girls you’ve ever met, not seeing why anyone in that group wouldn’t jump at the chance to be with her. 

but then wooyoung turns around and his eyes light up upon seeing you, walking over and wrapping his arm around your waist. 

“hi, baby. i see you met, lisa.”

“yeah,” you say quietly, shyly smiling at him before lisa’s voice cuts in. “you didn’t tell me you guys have been together for a year!” 

“almost a year,” you mumble but it goes unheard as wooyoung tightens his hold on your waist. “yup,” he says, placing a kiss on the side of your head and you can’t help but press yourself into him. “it has been pretty long, right, y/n?”

you lick at your lips as you nod your head, something about his words making your stomach knot until he squeezes your waist affectionately. “i want you to meet someone, my friend yeosang just got here.” you’d heard a lot about that boy over these past few weeks, someone in a few of his classes who rivaled him in terms of sassy remarks. 

“okay,” you say softly, smiling up at him and he places a peck on your cheek. “it was nice meeting you, lisa.” she smiles at you in a way that seems forced, her mouth tight and eyes looking between you two with a cold, almost mocking expression; it’s hard to explain really, you just know you don’t like it. 

“you too, y/n, i hope we can hang out some other time.” you smile at her as you nod your head, wooyoung dismissing the girl with a “see ya, lisa,” as you make your way to the other room.

you don’t question wooyoung until later that night, your head on his chest as he absentmindley plays with your hair. “woo, how do you know lisa?” you blurt out, his nickname falling from your lips causing her voice to ring in your head.

“she’s friends with mingi and them,” he tells you lazily, his eyes closed as his fingers continue to rake through your hair. “think she’s also in my english class.” you take in the information and nod your head, your quiet “oh,” causing him to pop open one eye.

“why do you ask?” 

you shrug your shoulders as you turn to bury your face further into him, feeling his hand quickly pull you away so you can look at him. “y/n...” he says and you can’t help the way you let out a tiny sigh. you don’t know why it’s been bothering you all night, the way she kept looking his way and called him by that name, but it has. 

and now you’re looking like a stupid, insecure girlfriend the second you meet one of his female friends. (except you didn’t have a problem with the four others you had met, it was just her). 

“what?” you squeak quietly. he takes your face in his hands, thumbs softly rubbing at your cheeks as he looks down at you with soft eyes. soft and honest and sweet, the way they’ve always looked at you. 

“what’s wrong?” 

“nothing,” you insist, shaking your head as his warm hands cover your cheeks. “i just...she’s pretty.” the last two words are squeaky and fall flat, a tiny sigh leaving him as he brings your face in closer and pecks the tip of your nose. 

“so are you,” he says, his thumbs caressing your cheeks again as he looks at you. “you’re pretty and you’re mine,” he says, snaking his hand down to tickle at your stomach. you giggle and wriggle against him, your tiny squeals of his name and his deep chuckle settling the sinking feeling in your stomach. 

you’re just being insecure, you think, wooyoung had never given you a reason not to trust him. 

three weeks later, on your one year anniversary, wooyoung comes down from school and spends the day with you. he took to the same restaurant and rollerskating rink like he did so long ago, when you were shy and reserved and still a little confused as to why he wanted to spend time with you.

but this time was even better than the last, still chaotic and a bit of a mess but some much needed time with your boyfriend. because with his coursework picking up, you haven’t been able to talk with as much during the week. but now you’re back at your house, laid out in your bed with your head on his shoulder as you watch a movie; or at least try to. 

because ever since the horror started, his phone hadn’t stopped buzzing. he kept kissing your head in apology, taking it from your bedside table and typing out message after message; you didn’t say anything until he had gone back and forth ten times. 

“do you want me to pause it?” you asked, moving your head off of him and scooting over. he looked over after he sent the message, shaking his head before putting his phone face down on the table; you try not to feel uneasy.

“no, love, i’m sorry,” he says, throwing his arm back around you before tugging him in to you. “lisa just had a few questions about an english project due next week.” 

you feel yourself grow stiff at the mention of her name, the casual way in which he says it not settling you in the slightest. instead, it makes you remember just how unsettled her presence made you. how something about her words and eyes seemed disingenuous. and perhaps you still think it was your own insecurities but you’ve also never not trusted your instincts before. 

“oh.”

he looks over at the tone in your your voice, frowning ever so slightly before pulling you into him. “i’m sorry, babe, i promise i’ll pay attention now,” he says, nuzzling his face into your neck. you smile as his hair starts to tickle your neck, giggling when you feel his lips on your skin before you’re screeching his name when he gets you on your back.

“stop,” you whine playfully, despite the way your arms wrap around his shoulders. he looks at you and smiles, leaning down to press a kiss to your lips. you hear the faint double vibration of his phone on your bedside table but you both ignore it, allowing his tongue to slip into your mouth as his hand rests on your waist. 

“love you, baby,” he hummed lowly when he pulled back, trailing his lips down to your neck before they go farther and farther until your mumbling your cries in the crook of your arm.

and because he loves you, he always understood you didn’t like to drink. you didn’t like the taste of it or the idea of not being in control of your body, settling for a coke or water at any party you went to. 

but a week before his semester was over, you drove up to visit and found yourself at another frat party. it was just as packed and loud as it was last time, the slightly overwhelming scent of alcohol and chattering of college kids making you uneasy. 

wooyoung and his friend’s made it easier, though, including you in the conversation when prompted and sitting with you as they waited for their turn at beer pong. “are you sure you don’t wanna play, love?” he asked you lowly, knelt between your knees as he looked up at you. 

“you know i don’t drink, wooyoung,” you said lowly, cheeks burning because you feel like a stupid little kid here. and he knows you don’t like these things in the first place so why would you wanna play? 

“i know but it’s just a game ba-”

“wooyoung! c’mon, i need a team member still,” lisa’s voice whined, smiling at you before her gaze trains on wooyoung. you narrow your eyes slightly, a sinking feeling deep within the pit of your stomach as you watch wooyoung nod his head at her. 

“i’ll be back, love, watch how quick i win,” he winks, raising up to place a peck on your lips before snaking over to the table. you watch with a small smile before it falls from your face, looking down to play with your fingers. you wanna play with him but the crowd and environment is too much, coupled in with the fact you’d be experiencing this firsthand in front of a bunch of seasoned college kids who will probably laugh at you. 

you look like you don’t belong here and you feel like it too. but wooyoung does, his handsome smile and infectious laugh just naturally bringing people in. an excited squeal leaves lisa when wooyoung’s ball lands right in the cup, his and her hand meeting in a high five that lingers just a little too long. 

you’re sitting there for twenty minutes, just watching pathetically as wooyoung and lisa land ball after ball. every time she gets in it, she’ll throw her arms up and her pretty long hair will swirl around gracefully. you have to resist the urge to roll your eyes, taking your phone out to distract yourself.

“hey,” you hear a voice say. your head pops up to see if they’re talking to you, the boy wooyoung introduced to you as yeosang looking down at you. he had described him as sassy and a bit of a blunt asshole but you hadn’t gotten that impression at all. he seemed sweet and kind, a soft-spoken voice with even softer eyes. 

“hi. yeosang, right?” 

“yeah,” he smiles, taking the seat next to you. there’s a few moments of silence and you look over again when lisa’s squeal pierces your ears. you take a sharp inhale, averting your eyes before you can see her and wooyoung celebrate together again. 

“why are you sitting here alone?” 

you peak at the boy looking thoughtfully at you and shrug, your lips quirking before you look back down at your hands. “just waiting for wooyoung to be finished,” you tell him. but then you hear someone say “rematch!” and your head snaps over, wooyoung smiling challengingly as he nods his head. 

his eyes graze over to you and they turn sympathetic, a frown on his face before he mouths “sorry,” before holding up one finger. you let out a sigh but nod your head, sending him a small smile that drops when his attention is pulled away by lisa. 

“you should tell him it bothers you,” you hear yeosang say, looking over at the boy with a wide eyed gaze. he says it so straight forwardly that it causes you to grown nervous, biting your lip before you open your mouth to speak. 

“what?”

he raises his eyebrow and you know he’s seeing through your lie. the lie that you’re not all bothered by being here and watching him play with another girl. a girl you’re almost positive has ill-intentions. and now you see where yeosang’s bluntness comes in. 

“that him and lisa make you uncomfortable,” yeosang tells you, looking over and seeing them smile at one another in victory. “because you’re worried, aren’t you?” 

it’s the first time it’s been verbalized and it makes your stomach squeeze painfully, sadness and anger and disappointment flooding through you. “should i be?” you squeak, since you know he sees you them a lot more than you. 

“i don’t know,” he says, the both of you looking over in time to see lisa smack wooyoung’s arm playfully as she throws her head back. “should you be?”

your conversation with yeosang rings your head for the rest of your time you’re there, wooyoung coming over after the eventual third game and taking you in his arms. “i’m so sorry, love, these pussies just wouldn’t accept losing,” he says loudly enough for mingi and another shorter boy to hear.

“it’s okay,” you say softly, begging him with your eyes to get out of here. and he must see it immediately because he takes your hand in his and pulls you up, snaking his arm around your waist tightly. “i’ll make it up to you, i promise,” he hums against your ear, “you wanna leave?” 

you nod against him as you smile shyly, pushing yourself further into him. wooyoung says his goodbyes to his friends, the girls you’d been talking to before waving at you and saying they hope to see you the next time you come up. all the girls but lisa, who snaked her way over with a frown on her face.

“you guys are leaving?” she whined, looking over you quickly before switching to wooyoung. “but what if i need other partner?” your boyfriend chuckles at the girl, tightening his hold on you when he feels you stiffen. 

“san’s pretty good, i’m just better,” wooyoung says before looking down at you. “little one wants to leave, though.” he says it lightheartedly but it makes your cheeks warm, like he’s talking about you as a little kid. 

“oh c’mon, y/n,” lisa says, her cold hand touching your arm playfully. “we were having fun.” you smile despite the rage coursing through you, shrugging your shoulders as you mumble out an excuse that you’re tired. 

“ah, right, i always forget you’re just a little high schooler,” she says, her voice snide and mocking like she knows that was one of your biggest insecurities. about you and wooyoung staying together. “you don’t like this kind of stuff, do you?” 

“i don’t like my boyfriend ignoring me, no,” you snap, lisa’s eyebrow raising as she looks between you and the boy staring at you in shock; you never snap like that and he hadn’t realized you felt that way. 

“yikes,” she mutters, her eyebrows shooting up sarcastically before looking at wooyoung comfortingly. “well i’ll see you guys soon, maybe,” she hums, might as well having said maybe, if you guys are still together come the spring semester. 

“what was that?” wooyoung asks when you get outside, your hands intertwined as you walk to his dorm.

“what was what?” you mumble, your eyes trained down on the street in front of you. you hadn’t meant to snap like that but you couldn’t help it, the whole night had been rubbing you the wrong way. 

“i wasn’t ignoring you, y/n, i was just preoccupied with the game. i asked you if you wanted to play.”

“when have i ever wanted to play drinking games, wooyoung?” you ask him, turning your head to look at him. “you know parties aren’t my thing.”

“then why’d you say it was okay to go?” he asks, the slightest hint of annoyance in his tone making you flare with anger. is he serious? he’s annoyed right now?

“because you wanted to go,” you say, eyebrows narrowed at him in confusion. “i wasn’t gonna ruin your last weekend here and say we shouldn’t go.”

“well i also don’t wanna fight with you my last weekend here, baby,” he says, smiling softly as his eyes roam over your face. he stops you both of you from walking and brings a hand to your hair, tucking it behind your ear gently. “we got through the first semester with no problems, love, let’s not ruin that, okay? i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to make you feel ignored.”

you let out a sigh at his voice, hating the way his soft tone and eyes can always make you feel relaxed. your eyes bore into his and he raises a brow, tapping the tip of your nose before leaning down to kiss it. “i’m sorry, babyyy,” he drags out, wrapping his hands around your waist and placing a peck on your neck. “don’t be mad at me.”

“i’m not mad at you,” you sigh out, not being able to help the smile on your face at his whining. and once he feels your body relax, it’s like he knows he’s clear. because he pops up and kisses you on the lips, his hand reaching up to cup your cheek. 

“let’s get home now, yeah? i want you sitting on my-”

“wooyoung!” you squeal, your hands flying up to your red cheeks as his loud giggle echoes through the street. 

you don’t know when exactly you felt the slight change between you and wooyoung. it might have been during christmas break, those six weeks of what was supposed to be bliss something of a reality shock. 

you thought spending everyday with him would be perfect, basking in the way you’d be able to do everything together again: go on dates and watch movies and have sleepovers so you could fall asleep next to him and wake to a kiss on your cheek. but instead, tensions began to form. 

it was almost unrecognizable at first, your dates still full of smiles and laughs but always ending short. “i’m sorry baby, my mom needs me to watch my brother,” he’d say, “i gotta wake up early tomorrow, me and the boys are gonna go to the gym in the morning.” 

but then when you guys actually were together, he’d seem distracted. absentmindley watching tv or playing games with you, his phone constantly vibrating as it lay face down on the table or bed. you’d ask him about and he always said it was probably seonghwa, jongho and yunho going crazy in the group chat. 

then the one night you caught a glimpse of him texting, you hadn’t even meant to. you just leaned over him to grab your glass on the table, pecking his cheek in the process and hearing him chuckle happily. but then your eyes caught the name lisa at the top of the screen and you nearly dropped the drink in your hand. 

“who are you texting?” you asked, holding your breath because if he lies, you know your heart’s gonna crumble right here. 

“lisa,” he says and, while you’re grateful he doesn’t lie, it doesn’t seem to lessen the blow. “she’s registering late for classes so she was just asking me which ones i’m taking.”

“oh,” you squeak out, bringing the cup to your lips so you don’t blurt out something you can’t take back. you swallow it down as you watch a smirk cross his face, typing out a message before he puts his phone back down. 

“you good?” he asks, turning to look at you watching him. you nod your head and place it back on the table, the phone buzzing again. 

“do you text a lot?” you blurt out.

you watch his expression soften and he pulls you into him, his arm around your shoulder as he holds you tightly. “baby...” he says. 

“what?�� you squeak, feeling your cheeks grow warm. you hate that you feel this way, insecurity and doubt in him and your relationship laying heavy on your heart. but you have to imagine if you were texting another boy that wasn’t him, he wouldn’t like it. but you also don’t know, you never put him in the position to feel that way before.

“we’re just friends,” he says and you bite the inside of your cheek so you don’t scream; you hadn’t said anything like that so why is he telling you that? “she only texted me for the schedule, love.”

you look up to meet his gaze and see a frown on his lips, his eyes trailing over every part of your face. “do you trust me?” he then asks suddenly, seeing all of the doubt and hesitation over your face. you immediately nod your head, feeling tears burn the back of your eyes at the idea of starting a fight. 

“then why does it seem like you don’t?”

and you don’t think much of this comment at the time, simply telling him all of your concerns about her being pretty and fun at parties and maybe being a better fit for him. 

but in retrospect, when you’ll look back at this moment, you’ll realize just how manipulative he was. how this was the moment wooyoung looked you in the face and told you that he didn’t care about any of that, that he loved you and only you and that as long as you were his, he’d never look at another girl. 

that he let you think for two more months that your intuition was wrong, that you were just an insecure girl not capable of trusting her perfect boyfriend. but he wasn’t a perfect boyfriend, you were coming to discover, especially when you sat alone in a restaurant near his school for your belated valentine’s day dinner.

he told you to come up that weekend so you could celebrate the holiday, saying just to meet him at a cute little cafe he’d been wanting to take you to. you arrived on time and waited in your car, looking around the area for his familiar face or figure. but after ten minutes, you shrugged it off and decided to get you guys a table. 

but you sat there for almost forty minutes now, texts and calls going unanswered by him. workers and other customers were starting to notice you get more anxious, looking at you with sympathy in their gazes like you’d gotten stood up on a first date. 

but this was your boyfriend of over a year, for your valentine’s day date, with a last minute gift you made for him weighing down your purse. feeling stupid and embarrassed, you shot up from your seat and charged back out to your car to drive to his dorm. 

you walked the familiar path to his room and banged on the door, mingi’s face falling slightly when he sees the expression on your face. “hey, y/n,” he says, his voicer louder than usual. “what are you doing here?”

but sick of being meek and polite all the time, you push your way through and are hit with the stench of the small room courtesy of lisa, wooyoung and san passing a joint as they sit on his bed. four other people are also spread out on mingi’s and the dusty floor, looking up at you and nodding their heads at you; you’ve never seen them before. 

wooyoung’s eyes widen the second he sees you, realization swarming in his face before he shoots up from his position.

“oh shit. hey, babe.”

you narrow your eyes at him, looking at the other people and seeing lisa staring right into you before you let out a humorless laugh, shaking your head and turning right around. 

“y/n, wait,” wooyoung says, but you’re already out of the room before he can say anything else. angry tears sting your eyes as you stomp down the hall, footsteps behind you following quickly. 

“y/n,” your boyfriend’s voice says again, tone begging and desperate for you to stop. but you only walk faster, walk as fast as you can to the door and push it open until the cold hair hits your face. 

“y/n,” he says firmly one last time, grabbing you by the arm firmly but gently. 

it fills you with so much rage, ripping it from his hold and spinning around to look at him. he has the balls to look sympathetic and upset, like he wasn’t getting high with random people, with lisa, while you were waiting for him on the date he planned.

“what?” you snap, looking at him and narrowing your eyes when he only looks at you taken back. “what wooyoung? what? you wouldn’t stop calling my name and now you don’t have anything to say?”

“i’m sorry,” he breathes out, stepping forward to put his arms around you but you step back and shake your head. hurt crosses his face and you wanna slap it off, thinking he has no right to be upset right now. 

“why were you- i was waiting for you,” you tell him bluntly, voice strong despite how weak and defeated you feel. you know things have been rocky these past few months, missing each other’s phone calls and elapsed silences when you do see each other but missing a date? 

“i know, baby, and i’m so sorry but i got distracted and didn’t notice the time and-”

“you’re the one who planned it wooyoung!” you yelp, “you got me excited thinking you actually wanted to see me and you left me waiting there for forty minutes.”

“i did wanna see you,” he says, stepping forward and grabbing you before you can move again. “i do wanna see you. i’m sorry. mingi’s friend’s came and we lost track of time.”

you press your lips into a tight line, wanting so badly to scream at him some more. these are all lousy excuses, they sound like bullshit to your and probably his own ears. if he didn’t wanna hang out with you, he could’ve just told you and saved you the-

his arms wrapping around you in a hug cause your thoughts to stop, arms shooting up as you consider pushing him away. but then his face falls into the crook of your neck and he tightens his hold on you, his mumbles of apologies and sweet nothings softening you slightly. 

“why were you smoking?” you ask. you didn’t have a problem with him drinking or smoking, you just had no idea he did that now. you feel like you don’t know anything about him anymore. 

“san brought it,” he says, pulling back and bringing his hand to your face. he caresses your cheek gently and a tiny frown covers his mouth, feeling a pang of guilt and hurt in his heart. “i really am sorry, love. i didn’t mean to forget and i’ve been so excited to see you. the time just got away from me.”

you purse your lips to the side in contemplation, looking up at him and shaking your head when, after a few silent moments, he smiles cutely at you. “i got you gift, too.”

you shake your head as you look at him, allowing yourself to move closer to him as he pulls you into his body. you’ve missed being like this with him, accepting the comfort and warmth and happiness he brings you. 

“i did too,” you tell him, “even though i should make you wait.” 

you know a pout is on his face before the whine leaves him, squeezing at your ticklish sides and making you spring away from him. “not fair!” you yelp. and then the teasing, borderline sadistic smile he gives you causes you to back up even more, speeding off in the direction of your car as he follows behind you. 

you struggle to walk with his arms wrapped around your waist, the both of you giggling as you fumble to your car. a small voice in the back of your head is telling him you let him off too easy, that you’re stupid to not have asked more questions and to listen to the pit in your stomach telling you something’s wrong. 

but you’re happy about the fact that you guys are good right now, that he’s smiling over at you with the softness is his eyes that remind you so much of the time you guys first started dating.

when you heard one monday that school would be closed on friday for testing, you immediately got the idea to surprise your boyfriend. you hadn’t been able to go up last week due to a family party and had really missed seeing him, his face on the camera of your phone not being enough to dull the ache in your chest. 

so when friday morning came, so did your overwhelming excitement. you jumped in your car and drove to his college happily, knowing he didn’t have class until later in the day and hoping you’d be able to just lay in his arms for a few peaceful hours. 

you stopped to get two coffees before you pulled into the parking lot, making your way into his building and down to his dorm. you do your best to knock on the door with your hip, surprised when it actually pushes open slightly. you hum happily, securing the two coffee cups in your hand before you open the door further.

“surprise!” you say teasingly, the happy smile on your face falling off immediately. because the surprise was actually for you, a shirtless lisa straddling your boyfriend’s lap as they kiss so naturally it makes you wanna puke.

you almost don’t believe what you’re looking at, the coffees falling from your hands and splattering on the floor. this isn’t real, there’s no way he would do that. he wouldn’t cheat on you, that’s not what your boyfriend wooyoung would ever do. 

but in the way your heart is pounding rapidly and threatening to break, the way lisa’s head snaps away from wooyoung’s and looks at you in shock, your boyfriend’s eyes widening before he pushes lisa off to the side, you know he did it. he very well had lied and cheated and completely betrayed you. 

“y/n, it’s-”

“not what i think?” you ask, voice eerily calm and even despite the chaos inside your body. 

“it’s actually exactly what you think,” lisa’s snide voice says and the hatred that courses through you, you don’t think you’ve ever felt before. you wish you hadn’t dropped the coffees so you could’ve thrown it in her smug face. 

“shut the fuck up, lisa,” wooyoung’s voice says, deep and low with an uncharacteristic growl in it before he makes his way over to you; it’s such a familiar scene, him moving toward you as you back away. except this time, you know you’re not forgiving him and the pain in your chest is ten time worse. 

“baby, i-”

“don’t call me that,” you say, voice raising but still strong and even as you continue to walk backwards.

“okay, okay, just let me explain-”

“it doesn’t matter,” you say, shaking your head as you look at him with tears building in your eyes. you don’t wanna cry and scream and give the smirking girl looking at you the satisfaction of watching you have a breakdown. but you also can’t control the tears, watching him look at you with sadness and sympathy swarming in his eyes. 

you thought you knew them so well and yet, he’d been lying to you the whole fucking time. 

“it does, y/n, i have to tell you-”

“how long?” you ask. you don’t know why you ask, you don’t wanna know. but you can’t help it, the kiss looked far too natural and familiar to be something that happened in the heat of the moment. 

“baby-”

and you can’t even help it when you stomp toward him and slap him across the face, your palm stinging as you his head snaps to the side. “i said to not fucking call me that,” you scream, wishing you could slap and punch and hit him over and over again for what he’s put you through these past few months. “now tell me. how long.”

and the coward that he is, with a red slap mark on his cheek, he shakes his head and looks at the coffee covered floor. you debate kicking him in the shin, just because you can and just because you have so many emotions swirling in you, before lisa’s voice pierces the air again. 

“last day before christmas break,” she tells you, her shirt back on as she lays back in his bed like she belongs there. “i kissed him and he kissed me back.” you look at her and are half tempted to go and slap her as well, a humorless laugh leaving you. it sounds manic and unhinged, like you have two minutes before you completely absorb what’s happening and have a breakdown, but you can’t stop yourself from shaking your head.

“why do you sound so proud?” you ask her, voice shaking and threatening to break. “you knew he was with me. you knew he had a girlfriend. why did you always-” your voice breaks and you have to stop talking, holding in the tears and screams wanting to leave you so badly. 

“i told you,” she says, cocking her head to the side as she looks at you. “i was hoping to find a boyfriend.”

“you didn’t find one,” wooyoung snaps, looking over her with disgust and rage in his eyes. “we were only-”

“hooking up?” lisa says, looking at him with a smirk before a melodic laugh leaves her mouth. “yeah, that sounds a lot better for your case, woo.” her eyes travel back to yours and she can only shrug her shoulders carelessly. “sorry but i saw him and wanted him. wish i had a better explanation for you.”

you bite the inside of your cheek and you think you’re probably drawing blood but you only nod your head, looking between her and wooyoung one last time. “well you have him now,” you say quietly, voice teary and breaking but it doesn’t even matter anymore. “enjoy.”

and like the dramatic exit any girl makes after she finds out she’s being cheated on, you turn around and slam the door before walking back outside. you feel the wet tears streaming down your face but only sniffle, wiping at your cheeks before the cold air finally hits them.

and that’s when you allow yourself to let out the first whimper, shaking your head as the tears start flowing because you can’t believe that just happened. you knew things had been rough and you knew you didn’t trust her so it’s not even like you can say you were surprised that she had gotten to him.

but that’s exactly the point. she had gotten to him, it was his duty to tell her to leave him alone and to stop talking to him and that he had a girlfriend he claimed to love. but now you have to get yourself together and drive home and wipe away every reminder in your room of-

“y/n, please,” you hear wooyoung say, his dejected form standing just outside the dorm building. you turn and his face crumbles when he sees you’re crying but really what the fuck does he expect? “please, please hear me out and if you never wanna see me again-”

“i already know i never wanna see you again,” you say, your voice back to being quiet and timid because you can’t take crying. you hate it and you hate that he did this. “so just go back inside, wooyoung.”

“no. not until you hear me out.”

and that sends another whole wave of emotions through you, mostly anger and rage as you stomp toward him and push him backward with all the strength you could muster. 

“go fuck yourself, i don’t have to hear out anything from you. you’ve been cheating on me wooyoung. for three months. do you not fucking realize what you’ve done?”

“of course i do, y/n,” he says and you see tears welling up in his eyes now but you can’t find yourself to care. “i knew it was a mistake and i tried to break it off so many times but then-”

“you knew how i felt,” you say and now your voice holds no anger or strength. it’s just purely devastated and broken and shaky. “you knew i didn’t trust her and that i was insecure and you just kept telling me i never had anything to-” a sob leaves your mouth and you shake your head, backing away from him. 

he already knows this, he heard this from you and lived with it for all of these months. he knew it before he started and while he did it, telling you that you trusted and loved each other, that you were his and he was yours and everything was gonna be okay. 

“you’re such a fucking asshole,” you cry and a tear rolls down his cheek as he steps closer to you. “y/n.”

“i’m never gonna trust anyone ever again. do you fucking realize that, wooyoung?” you cry, his voice ringing in your head from january, when now you know he had already been with her, asking why you didn’t trust him. “you were with her and turned it around on me and asked why i didn’t trust you.”

he only starts to cry more as you piece together his lies and disgusting behavior, his gut wrenching and heart pounding the more this plays out. 

“i’m sorry,” he says shakily, moving closer to you and taking your hands in his. “i’m sorry, y/n. please. please forgive me just this once and i promise i’ll-”

“you’re not seriously doing this right now,” you snap, eyes shooting up to his tearful ones and looking at him in outrage. 

“i need you, baby, i love you and i fucked up but please, you can’t-”

“get away from me,” you say, attempting to rip your hands from his grasp. but he only tightens them and brings you closer to him.

“if you just listen to me, maybe you’ll-”

“stop,” you say, struggling to pull your hands free. you need to get away from him. you can’t hear him sound this pathetic and sad and begging. 

“no. i need you to fucking hear me out and-”

“let go of me,” you say through clenched teeth, hot wet tears burning your eyes and running down your face; he’s making this a lot more dramatic and heartbreaking than it already is. but then he pulls you into him and wraps you in a hug and you’re so close to kneeing him between the legs. 

his buries his head in the crook of your neck and holds you like his life depends on it, like his life just crashed down as he realized what the fuck he’s been doing for these past few months.

but you’ve realized for these past few months that things were different, that an awful strain was happening between you two and there was gonna be a sad ending no matter what.

so you push him away again with all the strength you have left and take a few steps backwards. “you lied to me, wooyoung. you lied to me and betrayed my trust and cheated on me with someone i told you i didn’t trust.” 

“y/n, i know but-”

“i never wanna see you again. or talk to you again. do you understand me?” 

“y/n...” tears are in his eyes and streaming down his cheeks and you’ve never seen him look so broken and fucked up before. but you’ve never felt this broken and fucked up before either, feeling like you’re about to collapse from the emotional havoc within you. 

“we’re done, wooyoung,” you say, with a tone of finality and strength you can’t believe you have right now. but you also have to get one more dig in because you think you have the right to after all of this. “go back to lisa, now.”

you walk to your car and feel relieved when he doesn’t follow you, slamming your car door and locking it before you allow yourself to really cry. sobbing uncontrollably into your hands, to the point where it’s hard to breathe and you don’t think you’re ever gonna remember how to breathe again. 

a tapping at your window has you jumping, getting ready to take off in reverse if it’s wooyoung begging for a second chance. but your teary eyes widen when you see his roommate mingi, looking at you with sad eyes. you swallow down the lump in your throat and get out of the car hesitantly, looking around to see if wooyoung was lurking.

you don’t say anything when you get out but mingi doesn’t say anything either. he just takes in your red eyes and teary, puffy face as the sounds of your sobs ring in his head over and over. sobs he feels at fault for, too.

“you found out?”

and even though you were already so broken and upset, those words somehow completely shatter you. your head snaps up and mingi’s face turns even more guilty and sad. you thought you and mingi were friends, always hanging out in the dorm with wooyoung and really coming to like the banter you three had. 

but that question really makes it seem as if...

“you knew?” 

he bites at his lip and doesn’t make a move, but the look in his eyes gives you all the confirmation you need. the way they look at you so apologetically and with pity, before they start roaming ever part of your face but your eyes. 

another choked, broken laugh leaves your mouth and you just turn around to get back in your car. but mingi’s big hand takes the top of the door and stops it, his deep “wait,” causing you to snap around.

“why?” you snap, “you fucking knew and you didn’t tell me, mingi!”

“he’s one of my best friends and my roommate, y/n, what i was supposed to-”

“and who am i?” you scream, because you’ve taken just about all you can today. “i thought we were friends too, mingi.” his soft, sympathetic eyes roam over your face and his giant frame deflates, biting down on his lower lip hesitantly. 

“i only found out last month,” he tells you honestly, “and he told me he was gonna stop.”

“oh, so what, he cheats on me in secret for a few months and everyone keeps me in the dark like a fucking idiot?” 

mingi looks down at hearing the brokenness and anger in your voice, his lack of a response or justification the only appropriate thing about this moment. because it doesn’t matter, none of this matters anymore and you just wanna drive home and forget about all of this. 

“it doesn’t even matter, mingi,” you say, taking his hand off your car door before dropping it in the air. “it’s over now. we’re done and they can be happy now.”

“he loves you, y/n,” the boy says quietly, like that’s supposed to make you feel better and run back into wooyoung’s arms. but you only laugh and shake your head, closing the door in his face before starting up your car. 

because if that’s love, you hope to never be loved again. it made you go against your intuition and doubt yourself and allowed you to stay with someone who just ended up lying to you and hurting you.

(part 2)

[prettyinlimegreenboots]

More Hearts Than Mine - Part I

As always, I do not own anything that you’re familiar with - Newsies, songs, characters, etc. This is loosely based on the song “More Hearts Than Mine” by Ingrid Andress. This has been rattling around in my head for a while and I decided to sit down and write it. As always, feedback would be wonderful! Warnings: cursing

Race - 17 years old, junior in high school - living at Medda’s Spot - 18 years old, senior in high school Charlie - 17 years old, junior in high school - living at Medda’s Amelia - 17 years old, junior in high school Albert - 16 years old, sophomore in high school - living at Medda’s Finch - 16 years old, sophomore in high school Smalls - 13 years old, 8th grade - living at Medda’s Romeo - 10 years old, 3rd grade - living at Medda’s Henry - 4 years old, daycare - living at Medda’s Jack - 19 years old, sophomore in college

October 4, 2019

“Let’s go! All of you are going to be late!” She hollered, her voice carrying throughout the house. Mornings were always crazy in the household but Medda wouldn’t have it any other way. It was always busy with six foster children running around getting into various amounts of mischief. To say, there was never a dull moment in the house and Medda lived for it.

Standing in the middle of the kitchen, she grinned seeing her children file in, sleep still in their eyes. She narrowed her eyes seeing a yawn escape his mouth. “Cover your mouth, Racer.”

Race looked at her with a grin. “Sorry momma. It’s Friday y'all.”

Charlie snorted, shaking his head. “Don’t matter because we’ve got a Chemistry exam that we’ve gotta get through before the weekend.”

“Don’t remind me.” Race groaned, throwing his head back as Smalls and Romeo joined him at the table.

Medda raised an eyebrow at the two. “Are you both ready for the exam?”

“Study hall right before it.” Charlie grinned, looking over at Race.

She shook her head. “An hour isn’t enough time to cram.”

“At least you don’t have a history exam.” Albert threw himself into a chair giving his older brothers a glance. “I second Charlie’s comment about study hall.”

Henry came running in, yelling about something. Medda raised an eyebrow, looking around the room, trying to see if anyone knew what was up with her youngest. Race, Charlie, and Albert all shrugged while Smalls and Romeo were focused on the bowls of cereal in front of them.

“Hey Henry, cool it.” Albert yelled, grabbing Henry and putting him at the opposite end of the table. “Can’t we have a breakfast in peace once in a while?”

Charlie shook his head, looking at his little brother. “You’re one to talk, Albie. Usually you and Racer are going at each other’s throats and causing a ruckus at breakfast. If we don’t have a quiet one, it’s typically your fault.”

Knowing she needed to squash whatever was happening in front of her before it got out of hand, Medda looked around the kitchen. “Hey remember Jack’s coming home tonight.” Medda called, causing the usual chaos of the kitchen to come to a standstill.

Concerned with the sudden quietness, Medda looked up from the six lunches she was packing. “You guys didn’t forget did you?”

“Uhhh no momma. Didn’t realize it came up so quickly.” Race was the first to recover pushing a bright smile on his face as he looked around at his foster siblings. “When will he be here?”

Medda smiled. “He said about 5, just in time for dinner. Don’t dilly dally tonight. Come home and get your homework done so you don’t have to don’t have to worry about it this weekend.”

“Did he say why he was coming home?” Albert bit into an apple, giving the room a wide glance.

Medda smirked. “As if that boy needs a reason to come home. He did mention he was bringing someone home with him.”

Several pairs of eyes widened at her statement as she levelset with each of her children. “Now listen here you’re going to leave your brother and whoever he brings home alone. No giving him crap or being the normal pain in the butts you are.”

“As if we’d ever do that.” Race’s jaw dropped looking first at Medda before looking between Albert and Charlie.

Medda sighed, pointing a finger looking at her oldest three. “Treat Jack’s guest as I treated you when you first came to live with me. If I hear of you pulling any tricks or pranks, you’ll be answering not only to me but I’ll let Jack deal with you as well.”

“Momma!” Albert and Race yelled, knowing that her threat was real. Between Medda and Jack, Albert and Race could only imagine the punishment they would cook up for them.

She chuckled, watching them shake their heads. “Be nice and be the kids I’m trying to raise you to be.”

“Ugh momma, why do you have to take all the fun out of it?” Race gave her a grin.

Medda grinned. “I’m not ruining your fun. I’m just telling you to behalf like the civilized children I know you to be. Now get going before you miss the bus.”

She quickly handed off the lunches she had packed before pressing kisses to each of their foreheads as she watched them walk out the door. She looked over at the three still sitting at the table with a grin. “Finish up and we’ll leave in ten minutes.”

Taking a sip of her coffee, she shook her head at the kids, knowing that they all loved their older brother dearly. “Momma?”

Looking up from her coffee cup, she looked over at Smalls. “Yes, Smalls?”

“Can we start up the conversation again about getting a dog?” She grinned, looking hopeful at her mother. “You know since Jack’s moved out and he had the energy of a dog.”

The calendar on the fridge caught her attention. “Felicity! Don’t talk about your brother like that. I thought we were going to table that until the summer.”

“Well . . . it’s almost summer,” Smalls grinned, raising her eyebrow in hope. Romeo, and Henry both stopped eating momentarily, looking between their sister and momma. “Come on Momma . . . what’s holding you back?”

“Summer is 9 months away. We’re going to be late if we don’t get a move on.” She gave the four a look. “We’ll table this discussion for when everyone is home and has a say.”

Smalls gave her mom a knowing look. “Because you know what everyone is going to say. Why not just say yes and we’ll tell everyone later?”

“Felicity, car now.” Holding out a lunch bag, she gave her daughter a look before pointing to the garage door. Her younger brothers followed suit as Medda grabbed her purse, keys and her own lunch with a sigh before following them out the door.

11:00am - Study Hall

Flipping open his Chemistry book, he tried to focus on the chapters the exam would cover. Looking across the room, he saw Charlie sitting with Amelia, his best friend since childhood, both of them absorbed in their studying. He sighed, flipping pages but not really paying attention to what he was reading. Feeling someone sit beside him, he picked his head up from his book. “You’ve been quiet all morning, what’s going on?”

Spot Conlon was one that was very protective of those around him and when those in his personal circle were not themselves, Spot Conlon was one to pick up on it immediately. Race often joked he should become a detective after high school.

“Jack’s comin’ home.” Race sighed, running a hand over his curls. “And he’s bringing someone back.”

Spot leaned back in his chair, whistling. “Any info on that person?”

“Momma didn’t know. Just that he’ll be home around 5, in time for dinner.” Race looked at his boyfriend. “I’m excited that he’s coming home but he’s never brought someone home before.”

Spot nodded, having been around the Larkin household since Race was adopted eight years ago. “Think it might be a girl or are you leaning towards a roommate?”

“I just talked to him yesterday and he didn’t mention anything about a girl.” Race sighed. “You know Jackie, he can’t keep his mouth shut normally.”

Biting his lip, Spot sighed. “Knowing Jackie, it’ll all be okay. Whoever this person is, should be more nervous than you.”

“What does that mean?” Race turned in his chair, giving his boyfriend a look.

Spot chuckled. “You and your siblings are an intimidating crew. Y’all look innocent but when you want, you all can be evil.”

Nodding, Race chuckled. “You’re right but momma put the kibosh on that. Will you come over tonight for dinner?”

“Medda alright with that?” Spot raised an eyebrow, giving his boyfriend a look.

Shrugging, Race closed his book with a slam. “She didn’t say anything about no boyfriends. I’m sure Finch and Amelia will be over just like normal.”

“I’ll be there.” Spot agreed. “I’ll text my sis and let her know.”

“Wanna dump all your Chemistry knowledge on me in the next thirty minutes?” Race leaned over, stealing a kiss from Spot with a grin.

Spot smirked. “You’re going to need more than 30 minutes, stud. You’ll need all the help you can get; all of which, unfortunately, I cannot help with.”

“Spottie . . . . please.” Race pleaded, giving him his best puppy dog eyes.

Leaning over, he kissed him, smirking. “Open your book and we’ll see what we can get through before the bell.”

4:30pm

Like any afternoon after school, the dining room table at Medda’s was rambunctious and loud. Nine kids were crammed around the table, each with their homework scattered around them. Medda was standing at the stove, stirring the sauce in the pot while listening to each of the kids talk about their day.

“Homework almost done?” Medda called, raising her voice a bit to be heard over the kids.

Various confirmations came from the table as she looked over at them. “Please put your stuff away and help set the table. Spot, Amelia, Finch, you staying for dinner?”

“If that’s okay, Medda?” Spot called, stuffing his book and notebook back into his backpack.

“Always sugar.” She grinned, raising a silent eyebrow in Finch and Amelia’s direction.

Finch nodded with a grin while Amelia hesitated. “Sorry Medda, mom’s making dinner and wants all her kids home tonight.”

“No worries, Amelia. I’m sure we’ll see you at some point this weekend?” Medda asked, looking at Charlie’s best friend.

She nodded with a grin. “I’ll be around. I’ll see you guys later.”

Several goodbyes were yelled as she made her way out the front door. Medda shook her head at the girl before stirring the pot of sauce on the stove. She had long considered Amelia another adopted child with how often she was over at the house. “So you don’t know anything about this person Jack’s bringing home, momma?”

“If I did, I would tell you what I know.” Medda said, looking between Charlie, Albert, and let her gaze land on Race, who asked the question. “Jack called me up last week and asked if it was alright if he brought someone home with him. That’s all he said. Now, he’ll be here in a little bit, so I need all of your bags put up in your rooms and wash your hands. Smalls, Romeo put plates out. Race and Albert silverware and Charlie cups, please.”

With assignments handed out, the kids scattered. Henry sat at the kitchen counter, swinging his legs, back and forth watching Medda with wide eyes. “What can I do momma?”

Looking at the table being set, Medda smiled. “Henry can you make sure every place has a napkin?”

He hopped off his chair doing as he was told while Medda took a moment to relax in the busyness of the house and thankful for everything that surrounded her.

“You alright, momma?” Albert asked, pausing in his movements of laying down the silverware, looking at her.

She smiled. “Just fine baby. Excited that all my children will be in the house this weekend. How’s that table coming along?”

“Almost done momma.” Race called. “How’s the spaghetti?”

She gave it one more stir before nodding. “It’s almost ready.”

“Momma, Race, Charlie, Albert, Smalls, Romeo, Jack’s home and he brought a pretty girl!” Henry yelled as several eyes went wide and the front door was thrown open.

Quickly wiping her hands, Medda put the towel on the counter before following the kids to the front foyer. She smiled at Spot and Finch who stood back, giving the family some space. Medda couldn’t help but tear up as her oldest walked through the door, holding a hand of a pretty girl, just as Henry had exclaimed.

[olivarryprompts]

Fanfic Friday #2

Welcome to Fanfic Friday! Each Friday I will post a new fanfic here and on A03. Enjoy x

Read/Save it on A03 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/31883764

{Elseworlds} 

Ship: olivarry 

Status: married

WC: 1503 

Barry’s POV

I woke up the normal smile on my face, and I reached over for Oliver. He wasn’t in bed, so I suspected that he’d started making breakfast for myself and William. I pulled on some sweatpants and my STAR Labs sweatshirt. 

“Oliver!” I called, entering the kitchen. This isn’t our kitchen. This isn’t our house. 

Iris was here.

“Hey babe, morning. Look at these, they’re perfect this time?” Iris went in to kiss me. 

“What-uh Oliver-could have just w-w? 

“Oliver? What about Oliver? Did you get enough sleep last night?” “Well he’s my, my-” 

I look down to my hand expecting to find my emerald wedding ring, but instead I am met with a standard silver wedding ring. 

“Where’s my ring? Where’s Will?”

“What ring? Who’s Will? Are you alright? Look, if it’s Cicada, we will catch him. And with Cayden J-”

“No. Uh, right, Cicada.” “Are you alright, Barry?”

“Just, tired I guess?” “It it my cooking because-” “No, no, no. These smell,” I take a whiff of the pancake she placed in front of me, “delicious.” They smelled beyond atrocious, and I would literally do anything for an omelet from Ollie. 

“-so he’s fine Caitlin?” She hummed a yes. 

“Really? There are no anomalies. I-i don’t have a brain tumor or-nothing?”

“Barry, you’re in perfect shape.” “Tell me about it? Look at these abs, all mine,” Iris said, laying her hands all over me. I very much disliked it. 

“Maybe lay off on the PDA?”

“You sa-” “I know I like touch. But, uh, I’m going to go home.” 

“Barry, you’ve been off all morning, what is going on?” I got up and headed into the hallway. I didn’t even bother waiting for one of them to come talk to me, I just sped off.  

As I made my way to star city, I had a scary thought. What if Ollie doesn’t remember me? What if Will doesn’t remember me? 

I ran straight to Star City and picked up Oliver from the scene he was fighting at. I sped Diggle back to Argus, and I took Oliver with me back to our place in Star City. 

“Barry?” he said, wrapping his arms around me. Relief flooded my body. 

“Oh thank god, Ollie, I was so scared that you wouldn’t remember me. Us.” “No, never.” We quickly kissed. 

“What the fuck is going on?” Oliver said. 

I showed my hand, “Seems like I’m married to Iris.” “And I’m married to Felicity.” “I woke up in her house.” “You woke up, in bed, with her?” “No need to get jealous, bear,” Oliver smirked. 

“Of course I’m going to get jealous. You’re mine, and we don’t even have our rings!” “Baby, come ‘ere.” He kept me in his arms. 

“We will figure this out. I promise you.” He kissed my head. I quickly changed out of my Flash suit and into some sweats and a hoodie from Oliver’s closet. 

“We need to figure this out. Asap.”

“Morning Dad,” William said, yawning. Dad. Not Dads. He doesn't remember me. 

“Hey kiddo,” Oliver said back. 

“Who’s that?”

“He’s, uh, a friend of mine. He’s helping me with some work. 

“Where’s Felicity? I need help with-” “Give me a second, Will. I need to figure this out. Can you stay here for a while on your own?” “Uhm, sure.” “Raisa will be here anytime now.” “O-okay. Dad is everything alright?” “It’s fine, kiddo. Promise. Right, I’m going to head to work.” Ollie kissed William on the forehead before heading out. 

I followed close behind. 

“Bye Will.” “Uh, bye?”

Once in the hallways, I started crying. 

“Hey, shh, we’ll figure this out.” “H-he doesn’t remember me. Will, our son, h-he doesn’t know me.” “I know, bear, but we’re going to fix this, I swear to you.” 

“I-i don’t know how Ollie, everyone one on this earth think I married Iris. S-she’s like my sister.”

He just held me close, and I buried my head in his neck. 

“Bear, I’ve got an idea. Everyone on THIS earth. Kara.”

“W-we’d need team flash to get to her earth.”

“We need to tell them what’s happened. They’re your best friends, they’ll know something is wrong.”

“I-i-” “Baby, I promise this will all be fine.”

“How? How can you Oliver? We have no idea what the hell is going on,” I was upset, admittedly, and angry. 

“Barry, calm down.” He wrapped his arms around my neck, resting his forehead on mine. I took a deep breath. Ollie was right, we’d figure this all out. 

“Through the good and the bad, right?”

He replied with a careful kiss on the lips. 

“Come on, let’s get to STAR Labs.”

Barry took my arm and sped us there. “Barry?” Caitlyn said, “You’re back, and Oliver?”

“Hello,” he said, calmly. “So, how do I say this. Ollie and I-well, we’re married.” Cisco laughed, “Y-you and Oliver.”

I shot him a look. “Oh, oh you’re serious?”

“Look, we got married on the 28th of August. You, you were his best man, Cisco. He both used to wear a ring with the other person's colour on it. I-i, we, I love him more than anything in the world.” 

“He-yeah.”

“Kiss then? Prove it,” Iris said, walking into the cortex. I carefully wrapped my arms around Barry’s neck, and leaned it. He was comfort, and love, and everything good in the world. When our lips met, it reminded me of that. I shifted my hands to run through his hair, and, a few moments later, we broke apart.

“Good enough?” I said, gesticulating wildly. 

“Yeah. That was no platonic kiss or whatever,” Cisco said, shocked.

“I tend to agree,” Caitlyn said. 

Iris just looked down, muttering, “I knew something was up this morning.”

“I-i’m so sorry Iris, it’s just that, that Ollie, he’s my everything and I need everyone to know that and remember that. And William he is my so-”

“Hey, hey Barry, I understand. I see how you look at him, it’s like the only thing in the world that matters is him. Y-you look at me with those same eyes, Barry Allen.”

“I promise this will all get fixed, I swear.”

“Go be a hero, Barry,” She whispered with a smile, laying a kiss on my cheek. I walked back over to Ollie, standing next to him. He wrapped a casual arm around me. Once a possessive git, always a possessive git. 

“Right, so we need to open a breach to earth 38.”

“Understood. I’ll grab the interdimensional extrapolator.” Cisco ran off, and we all stood there in somewhat of an awkward silence. 

“So, Barry, Oliver, when did you two meet?”

I looked at Ollie, silently begging him to answer the question.

“W-we met when he came to investigate a case similar to his mother's back in Starling. We ended up talking, going for dinner, but I thought he’d aired me. Turns out the whole coma thing was the reason he didn’t respond to my texts. Both our night jobs just pulled us together. It’s always been easy with Bear.“

“Right, one interdimenstionall extrapolator ready to go,” Cisco said, placing the small discus looking object in my hand. 

“Thanks,” I said, opening a breach. 

We quickly ended up on a farm on earth 28 greeted by, well, people threatening us. Well, that is, unti Kara showed up. 

“They’re friendlies, they’re friendlies!” she called, “Barry, Oliver!” 

“Hey.”

“Meet my cousin Clarke.”

“As in the super one?”

Kara nodded. “You can just call me Clarke,” he smiled. 

“Barry Allen-Queen.”

“Oliver Allen-Queen.”

“Lovely to meet you, two. This is my wife Lois.” We both greeted her. 

“Kara, you know we’re married right?”

“Of course, otp.”

“Oh thank god!” I exclaimed. 

“What, what’s happening?”

“Everyone on our earth thinks he’s married to Iris, and they think I married Felicity.”

“W-wait? Really?”

Oliver nodded his pensive nod.

Time skip to when the book resets them 

I woke up again, but this time in the right bedroom. I reached my hand over, and I felt Oliver’s chest. 

“Ollie! Ollie!” I said, tears rolling down my face as his eyes fluttered open. I immediately cuddled into his chest. 

“Barry- look,” he said, carefully taking my fingers into his hand, and glossing over my hand. 

We both sighed with relief. 

“This isn’t over, Bear,” he said.

“I know. I know it isn’t. I-i’m just glad to be here.”

“Yeah me too,” he placed a kiss on my lips. 

“I’m going to go check on Will,” I said, getting up. I threw on some sweats and a hoodie. 

He hummed in agreement. 

I made the small walk to Will’s room, carefully sliding open the door. Will was sitting at his desk, typing at his computer. 

“Hey dad,” he said, briefly looking up.

I quickly wrapped my arms around him, kissing his forehead. 

“Dad? You alright?”

‘Yeah, fine, Fine now,” I smiled. 

“You’re acting strange.”

“I-it’s nothing kiddo. All good.”

“Ok. Can you get Dad to make his pancakes for breakfast?” “I might need your help convincing him.”

“Let’s go, then.”

The battle was far from won, but Ollie and I, we could figure it out. 

Read it/save it on A03 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/31883764

[atlafan]

Take it Slow - Part Two

a/n: okay this is my first shot at a harry:y/n fic, and it will be multiple parts. y/n had a bad experience with an ex over a year ago, and finally accepts her coworker and good friend Niall’s invitation to go on a blind date with his friend Harry. (No smut yet, getting closer though.)

Part One

Harry drove straight to Niall’s apartment, and banged on the door as soon as he got there.

“Good thing I didn’t have a woman over!” Niall says to him, letting Harry walk in. “So, how was the date?”

“It was great, actually.”

“Don’t sound so surprised, I wouldn’t set you up with some idiot.”

“Well, you have before.”

“And yet you still trusted me.” Niall’s phone buzzes, he check it and smiles.

“Is that her?”

“Oh no, I’m not stayin’ in the middle of this. Did you give her your number?”

“Yes.”

“Alright, so text her.”

“It’s too soon. Maybe in a little while I certainly won’t wait until tomorrow.”

“Did anything happen between you two?”

“She kissed me on the cheek before she got into her car. I would have liked to do more, but I didn’t want to push it.”

“Good idea. I won’t fill you in on too much because it’s not my story to tell, but she’s been burned in the past, so taking it slow with her is smart.” Harry plops down on the couch.

“She’s so smart, and funny. There was never a lull in conversation. And she complimented my nails. Like, she genuinely liked them.”

“Why wouldn’t she?”

“I don’t know, you know how some people can be.”

“When do you think you’ll see her again?”

“No idea. I don’t want to seem too eager.” Niall’s phone buzzes again. “It is her! What is she saying?”

“Nothing, she just thanked me for setting her up with such a nice guy, and that she had a really nice time.” Harry smiles a toothy smile.

“We really did have a nice time. Ugh, the dress she wore, it was breathtaking.” He slaps his forehead with his palm.

“What?”

“I’m such an idiot, I never even complimented her appearance.”

“That could be a good way to start a conversation over text later.”

“Brilliant! I’ll give it an hour or so.”

Harry left Niall’s after an hour. When he got home, he settled into a pair of sweatpants, and got cozy on his couch, flipping the TV on. He grabbed his phone and texted you.

“I had a great time tonight. I forgot to tell you how beautiful you looked.” He awaited your reply nervously. Within five minutes, you responded.

“I had a great time too, and thank you!” You had sent along the smiling emoji with the blushing cheeks.

You two texted back and forth for about an hour, until you passed out. He figured as much when you stopped responding, and put himself to bed. The next morning you frantically texted him.

“So sorry, I fell asleep!”

“G’morning beautiful.” He promptly responded. This sent butterflies through your stomach and made you squeal. Suddenly you were in high school again, getting excited over as something as simple as a good morning text. “What are you up to today?”

“Just the usual Sunday routine, cleaning, grocery shopping, meal prepping. All that fun stuff ;)”

“Sounds about the same as my routine, lol”

The texting dwindled by midday. You both got busy with other things. Sunday evening you decided to do a little self-care, and put a clay mask on while watching TV. Just as you were settling in, you heard the buzzer for your apartment, and saw a missed call from Niall.

“Is it just you down there?”

“Of course, who else would be with me?”

“You know who!”

“Would ya just let me up?!” You rolled your eyes and buzzed him in.

He immediately burst into laughter when he saw your face. You swatted at him to stop. You went into the bathroom to wash everything off.

“What are you even doing here?” You asked, coming back into the living room. He was now seated on your couch.

“I wanted to hear about your date.”

“It couldn’t wait until tomorrow?” You asked, sitting down next to him.

“No because we would just get interrupted with work. He came over last night right after.”

“Really?” You perked up.

“Mhm, he had a great time. Did he end up texting ya?”

“Yeah we talked all night, and he said good morning to me today. It was so sweet.”

“Oh good, he was nervous it would be too soon to contact you.”

“You don’t have to do this y’know.”

“Do what?”

“Become this middle man.”

“S’not what I’m doin’. I just wanted to see how you were. I’m your friend, and I never want to see you how were like that last time.” A flash back to your horrible appearance from your depressive episode plays in your head.

“That was over a year ago. I’m much better now. I saw a therapist remember? I wasn’t treated right, and I blamed myself, but I don’t anymore. That guy was just a jackass. Harry seems really sweet.”

“He is, he’s one of the nicest guys I know.”

“He told me you became really good friends because you both don’t like wearing clothes.” You can’t hide your laughter.

“That asshole.” He laughed along with you.

The next day at work, you brought Niall a coffee. You couldn’t stop thinking about Harry. You hadn’t texted anymore, but you didn’t think much of it. Around noon, just before you went to meet Niall for lunch, you got a call. You saw Harry’s name, and closed your office door.

“Hello?”

“Afternoon beautiful.” You blush and silently squeal to yourself.

“Afternoon, handsome.” You hear a small chuckle. “What’s up?”

“Nothin’, I was just wonderin’ when I could see ya next.”

“Oh, well, how about Friday after work?”

“Too long from now. Do you not go out on school nights?” He teased. You couldn’t help but laugh.

“Something like that. I like to go to the gym after work, and by the time I get home I eat dinner, shower up, have a little time for TV, and then go to bed.”

“I suppose Friday could work. Honestly, if I met you for lunch or something I don’t think I’d be able to let you go back to work.” He said in a playful tone, trying not to sound controlling.

“Did you have anything in mind? Dinner again?” You didn’t mind going out to eat again.

“Sure, we could do that. Something less formal though.”

“That sounds good to me.” There’s a knock on your door. “I gotta go, but I’ll text you later to flesh out the details.”

“Alright, talk you soon.”

You hang up and open your door to find Niall, he sighs with relief.

“Christ, I thought you left and I was going to be forced to eat with those old biddies.”

“I would never do that to you.” You grab your lunch box and head with him to the break room. “Harry just called, we’re going out Friday after work.” You say, both sitting down at a small table.

“That’s great! Where are ya gonna go this time?”

“Don’t know yet.” You shovel some food into your mouth. “Somewhere more casual. I’d love to go like one of those adult arcades or something, maybe I’ll suggest that.”

“Oh he’d love that. But be careful, he tends to get competitive.”

“I’ll keep that in mind, thanks.” You smile at your friend. You know he means well, and you appreciate him looking out for you.

That night after work, you decide to be bold and give Harry a call after getting home from the gym.

“Good evening.” He says.

“Hey, sorry for not getting back to you earlier, I had meetings all afternoon, I barely got anything done.”

“S’no problem, love.” Must be a British thing that he keeps calling you love.

“I thought of something fun we could do Friday.”

“Oh really? Lemme hear it.”

“How about going to one of those adult arcades? Like Dave and Busters?”

“Oh, that sounds like great fun. They have dinner and stuff there too. I don’t think there’s one around here though.”

“There’s a place like it, sort of an off brand version. I’ve been a couple times with my girlfriends, it’s a lot of fun.”

“Sounds good to me. Good way to blow off steam at the end of the work week.”

“For sure.”

The place you suggested was called Pinz. It was this massive adult arcade that also had bowling. There were two giant bars, and plenty of places to sit and have a meal. You had been for a bachelorette party and it was so much fun. There’s something for everyone to do.

You and Harry text and call each other throughout the week. By the time Friday rolls around you’re extremely excited to see him face to face again. You pack everything you’re going to wear that night in your work bag as you agreed to meet around six. The day went by surprisingly quick. You locked your office door so you could get changed. You put on a dark pair of skinny jeans, and a pair of black booties. Next you put on a red short sleeve top. You changed necklaces, and freshened your perfume. Your hair was in a high, wavy pony, and you liked the way your hair cascaded over your shoulders, so you kept it like that. As you walked out, you bumped into Niall.

“Well don’t you look lovely?” He said.

“Aw, thank you. I’m so excited to see him.”

“He’s excited too.”

You exchanged goodbyes as you made your way to your cars. You fell a little nervous driving up to the bar. You had second date jitters for sure. You got there a little before six. You wanted to have a drink before he got there, or at least start one. Around six fifteen, half way through your drink, you get a text from him saying he just parked. You smiled and told him you were inside already. Moments later you see him walk in. He was wearing black jeans, which were slightly ripped at the knees. He also had on a pair of boots. He had a green t-shirt on, and smiled the minute he saw you.

When he got over to you, this time instead of a handshake, he took you in for a gentle hug. He noticed the drink in your hand.

“Starting without me I see?” You look down and your face goes red. “Teasing.” He orders himself a drink. “Cool place, it’s massive.”

“Yeah, there’s definitely plenty to do.”

“Would you mind if we ate first? I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t starved. I had to skip my lunch today.”

“Of course!”

You two are seated in just a few minutes. Harry frowns when he looks at the menu.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothin’, just a lot of like chicken wings and ribs and stuff. Not sure what I can eat is all.”

“Shit, I’m so sorry. I figured we’d get some apps like mozzarella sticks or spinach dip, I completely forgot you don’t eat cheese. If you want we can leave and come back.”

“No, no, it’s fine. I’ll get a salad or something. Look here, chips and guac. Do you like guacamole?”

“Love it!”

“Then we can split that if you like.” He gives you a smile, and you feel at ease.

You both get a garden salad, and the chips and guac. Once you’re both properly fed, you get two more drinks, and head over to the arcade section. You start off the with basketball game. Usually Harry would be competitive, but he gets distracted by the way your shirt subtly lifts up when you shoot, just barely seeing your midriff. He notices your belly piercing and smirks. He makes up his baskets, and ends up beating you at the game.

Next you go to ski ball, which you end up beating him at, not that either of you were keeping score. You both shied away from the games that were literally just for winning tickets. You share many laughs, and before you know it, you’re drunk. How did you manage to get drunk at the arcade? Salad. You literally ate the lightest thing on the menu. He seemed to be a bit buzzed, but doing better than you.

“Mind if we sit for a bit?” You ask him. Music was starting to play. The DJ must have just gotten there. Oh yeah, there’s a dance floor here too, you remember.

“Sure thing.”

You find a high top to sit at, and Harry gets you both some water.

“Thank you, I’m parched.” The cold water slaps the back of your throat, careful not to drink too much in fear of throwing up.

“This place is great.” He smiles at you.

“I’m glad you’re having a good time. I never asked you earlier, why did you skip lunch?” A little hiccup comes out, and you cover your mouth.

“Just a busy day shootin’ pictures. We had a tough time getting the lighting just right. I’m too picky for my own good sometimes.”

“Do you ever travel for work?”

“Sometimes, not as often as I used to. I don’t quite like traveling anymore.”

“Why’s that?”

“Well for work at least. I mean, I’m about to turn twenty-six, it was getting old barely spending time at my apartment that I pay way too much rent for to not actually live in it. I’d rather travel on my own time, and take pictures that I want to take. Not just follow a shot list.”

“That makes a lot of sense.” You say nodding along to his story. He looks at his watch. It’s already nine.

“Not to sound too forward or anything, but would you care to get outta here? I’m not much one for dancing, and it’s getting louder in here by the second.”

“Sure!”

You stand up, and he puts his hand on the small of our back to help guide you through the people. As you walk outside the fresh air hits you, and it feels amazing. You look up at him concerned.

“Harry.”

“Yes?”

“I think I’m too drunk to drive.” He laughs.

“Don’t worry, love, I can drive us.”

“You’re okay to?”

“Yeah, I didn’t have that much, remember you were a whole drink ahead of me.” He winks at you. “I can always pick you up tomorrow to get your car.” You appreciate that he’s clear about not spending the night together.

“That would be great. We can go hang out at my place if ya want?” You slur. “Might be easier if you already know where I live.”

“That works.”

He walks you to his car, and opens the door for you. You give him your address and he puts it in the GPS. You sober up a bit on the drive, but definitely still feel a buzz. You walk up the steps of your apartment, and open the door for him. You key in, and thank god you had thought to clean up.

Your apartment was cute and simple. It was a one bedroom, and you had an en suite bath. There was a half bath next to the coat closet as you first walked in. That was partially why you rented this specific place. You loved having a bathroom right there in case you really needed to pee. As you walk in to the main area there was an open concept kitchen and living room. You used a futon on as your couch so guests had a place to sleep if need be.

“This is a nice place you have.” He says looking around.

“Thanks, it’s definitely a big girl apartment. It’s nice to finally make enough money where I don’t need a roommate.”

“I know the feeling. It was nice living with Niall for so long, but after a certain point you just want your own space.”

“Can I get you anything?” You ask walking over to the kitchen, he follows and sits down on one of the stools at your island.

“Just some water would be great, love.”

You fill up two glasses of water, and hand him one. You guzzle yours down, and fill up another immediately. You realize how much you need to pee.

“Pardon me, I’ll be right back.”

You go use your bathroom, and freshen up your makeup. When you walk back out Harry has made himself comfortable on your couch. You see him scrolling through his phone. He smiles up at you when he notices you. He pats the spot next to him, and you sit down, tucking one leg under yourself.

“What’s your apartment like?” You ask, trying to think of something to say.

“Sorta like this actually. Only mine’s a studio.”

“Oh, you don’t mind just having your bed out?”

“I don’t have guests over often. I work a lot on the weekends sometimes. It’s enough space for me.” He gives you a half smile. “I’m sure eventually I’ll get something bigger, but for now it works. Less to clean too.”

“Good point. I started out in a studio when I first moved out of my roommate’s place, but I felt like I was in an oversized dorm. Once I saved up some money I got this place. Been here a little over a year now.”

“It’s a nice neighborhood too.”

“Yeah! No creeps in this building either. I feel really safe. Plus Niall doesn’t live too far away either.”

“Definitely nice to have a friend close by. Where do your girlfriends live?”

“A couple of them live together on the other side of town. My best girlfriend just got married about six months ago. Her and her boyfr-husband live in the suburbs in their house.”

“Wow, a house.”

“I know right? He’s an oral surgeon so he makes a ton of money. I think he covered their entire down payment.”

“Did she marry him for that fact?”

“No, they were friends for a long time actually. One day they both went out, got drunk, and hooked up. Next thing we all knew they were a couple.” You look down for a second then back up. “It really changed the group dynamic if I’m being honest. We all stopped hanging out as much, it was hard. But I’m happy for them. Then I met Niall at work and things got better too.”

“Can I ask, did you and Niall ever go out?”

“Oh, god no. I mean, don’t get me wrong, the accent had me swooning when we first met, but he’s more like a brother to me than anything. I wouldn’t survive that job without him. I’m not sure why he and I became such fast friends, but I’m glad we did.”

“He raved about you for a long time, and I always told him to just ask you out, but I’m glad he didn’t.” He lets out a nervous laugh.

“He’s just sweet like that.”

“He mentioned one time that you had really been through it, and he knew you were better off having a friend.”

“Yeah, um, a little over a year ago something happened, but…”

“Jesus, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have even brought anything up.”

“No, it’s okay. Maybe I’ll tell you some other time, but not tonight.”

“Fair enough, sorry.” He gives your bent knee a little squeeze, and takes it away. You miss his touch immediately.

“It’s okay, really.” You smile. “Sometimes I just don’t have a great judge of character I guess.”

“Can I ask you something?”

“Sure.”

“What made you agree to a blind date?”

“I don’t know exactly. I was sort of getting sick of the online dating thing. Most of those things were just for hook ups anyway. I know twenty-four isn’t old, but I just felt like I was getting too old for it. I have to say, I wanted to cancel with you.”

“Why’s that?” He says, fake offended.

“Because I couldn’t find you online anywhere! I found your Instagram, but there was no picture of you. I practically stalked Niall’s Facebook, but I couldn’t tell which one you were in any group photo. And he wouldn’t show me a picture of you.” Harry laughs at your sloothyness.

“When I finished grad school I got rid of my Facebook, and turned my Instagram into my brand for my freelance work. I do have a private Instagram though, but it’s under a completely different username.”

“Hm, maybe you’ll show it to me?”

“Perhaps another time.” He winks at you. “I found you online, although I couldn’t see much.”

“My privacy settings are tight.”

“I noticed.”

“So, you saw my face then?”

“I did, and I still wanted to meet you.” You scoff and nudge his shoulder as he laughs at his bad joke. “Teasing.” He puts his hands up. “I saw your picture and couldn’t believe such a beautiful woman was single.” You roll your eyes with a smile.

“You know exactly what to say don’t you?” He shakes his head no. “What made you agree to a blind date?”

“Same reason as you, I guess. Although, I almost didn’t agree because that bastard has set me up with some real stinkers before.”

“Well I’m glad I wasn’t a stinker.” You laugh.

“Me too.” He puts his hand over yours and gives it a squeeze. You slump further into the couch, feeling relaxed by his touch. He furrows his eyebrows for a moment while he looks at you. He reaches his hand up, and swipes his thumb across your cheek bone. You nearly flinch. “Sorry, eyelash.” He holds it up so you can see. “Make a wish.” He smiles. You nearly melt. You close your eyes and blow softly on his thumb.

When you open your eyes back up to look at him, you notice his pupils have gotten larger. He leans in close, cupping your cheek with his hand.

“Is this alright?” He says in almost a whisper. You nod your head yes.

You close your eyes, and feel his lips brush against yours. He kisses you lightly, almost tender. You kiss him back, and lean into him. He puts his hands on your back to pull you a little closer. Your hands press flatly onto his chest. You both sink into the kiss. His lips tasted like mint from the gum he had chewed in his car. You want to part your lips for him to let him in and explore, but you’re also afraid to move too fast. You break the kiss and look at him. His eyes pop open and gives you a concerned look.

“Something wrong, love?”

“No, it’s just, I don’t want this to move too fast.” You try to keep a soft expression to assure him it’s more of a you thing than it is him.

“Alright.” He smiles at you. “Should I be going then?”

“That might be for the best.” He gets up, and you follow him out the hallway. “It was a really nice kiss though.” You say, surely blushing.

“I’d very much like to do it again sometime.”

“Me too.”

“What time should I grab you to pick up your car?”

“Fuck, I almost forgot about that. What time works for you, I’m on your schedule.”

“How about around ten? We could go for brunch if you like?”

“Oh I would love that Harry.” You beam at him. “Thank you for being so understanding tonight.”

“Don’t thank me, (y/n). You told me to stop so I did.” He smiled and shrugged. “I’ll see you tomorrow, goodnight.”

You pull him in for a hug, and quick kiss on the lips, which surprises him. He sighs happily when you finish your hug. He leaves and you sigh as well. You could kick yourself. You wanted more of him, you wanted to see how he actually tasted. But you were so scarred from the last time you started seeing someone that you just couldn’t do that to yourself again.

[peachy-beomie]

Holding You In My Heart (Until I Can Hold You In My Arms) <KUNTEN>

Genre: Fluff

Pairings: Kunten (Qian Kun x Ten Lee)

Word Count: 1,643

Warnings: None!

Synopsis: COVID AU in which Kun sets up a bunch of cute zoom dates for him and his boyfriend.

A/N: I got bored and I really want to start working on my masterlist so I decided to post this :D

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29410125

From: qiankunprod@gmail.com

To: chittaphonleechaiyapornkul@yahoo.com

Join Zoom Meeting

{zoom link}

I stare quizzically at the email that pops up on my screen, interrupting my FRIENDS marathon. The message comes from none other than my boyfriend Kun, who’s been spending all of quarantine so far looking for ways for us to go on dates.

When COVID hit, Kun and I were forced to confine ourselves in our respective apartments, limiting contact. It hasn’t been too hard thus far, we call and text everyday without fail. Simple good mornings and silly pictures of my cat sufficed for the first month or so. But as the quarantine dragged on, I began missing Kun’s face more and more. We hadn’t been on a proper date in god knows how long, and it was starting to impact my mental health.

Curiosity consumes me as I click the link, awaiting whatever dorky plot Kun had conjured up. Within seconds his lopsided grin filled my screen and drew a small smile from my lips.

“Hi Sunshine!” He greets cheerfully, the familiar pet name bringing warmth to my cheeks.

“Heya baby, what’s this about?”

“Nothing, just missed you.” Kun’s tone has a hint of mischief that doesn’t go unnoticed by me. But playing along with Kun is way more fun than interrogating him.

“Mmm not as much as I missed you. You sure there’s no special reason for this?” I can see Kun’s eyes sparkling despite the low quality graphics.

“Weeeeellllllll I suppose I did want to ask if you’d want to go on a date?”

“A date? How would we do that?”

“Like this!” Kun gestures eagerly at the screen. “Through zoom! I found all kinds of fun things we can do.”

“And when would we do this?”

“I mean I’m free now…” Kun suggests, eliciting a giggle from me. Sometimes Kun’s cuteness is unbelievable.

“That works for me. What’d you have in mind baby?” Kun’s eyes sparkle mischievously.

“Wanna get your ass whooped at Mario Kart?”

“In your d r e a m s Qian.”

⏳

After that initial date, zoom dates with Kun became a frequent occurance. Kun wasn’t kidding when he said he had a lot of ideas. He set up so many dates ranging from movie nights (“You know he comes back in the next movie right?” “TOM HOLLAND IS TOO HOT TO DIE KUN.”) to a talent show consisting mostly of magic and Louis ignoring my attempts to make him do tricks. I began to look forward to each and every one of the meetings. Especially if it’s my turn to plan the date (“It’s more fun playing Just Dance against you cause you’re uncoordinated and I always win.” “Shut up.”). Dates with Kun made quarantine far more tolerable, though I still missed cuddling with Kun. The teddy bear he sent me as a replacement was a kind gesture though.

I hold it close as I watch Kun struggle to repeat the steps I taught him. A small chuckle escapes my lips, and Kun immediately turns to me with a pout.

“Don’t laugh, I think I’m doing alright.”

“Oh yeah at this pace you’ll be in level 2 hiphop in no time,” I joke, only laughing harder at the huff Kun lets out. “I wasn’t laughing at you darling, just thinking about how much I love you.” The older boy looks slightly stunned by my confession but he’s beaming from ear to ear within seconds.

“I love you too Sunshine.”

***

“It’s way too salty.”

“I told you the recipe didn’t call for a cup of salt but you wouldn’t listen!!!” I giggle at my exasperated boyfriend before putting the failed noodle dish in the sink.

“Maybe I should hire a better teacher.”

“Good luck finding someone else who’ll tolerate your bullshit like I do,” We both chuckle at that. “Are you available for another date Friday night?”

I pretend to think it over before shrugging, “I suppose I can fit you into my schedule.” Kun glares cutely at me through the screen. “What do you have planned?”

“It’s a surprise.” Kun wiggles his eyebrows for emphasis.

“Sounds mysterious.”

“Well if I recall correctly you love suspense,” Kun muses, “You in?”

“Of course.”

Kun tries to keep up his mysterious demeanor, but the way he visibly lights up at my confirmation is impossible to miss.

“Then I’ll see you in 3 days sunshine.” And with a final wink, he ends the meeting.

Cheeky fucker.

⏳

Finding the patience to wait for Kun’s surprise proved quite challenging. I couldn’t help but mull over what on earth the older man had planned. The existence of the mystery lifted my previously sour mood, but I couldn’t for the life of me solve for x while Kun’s gleeful words raced through my head.

After nearly an hour of staring at the same math question, I decide planning my outfit would be a better use of my time. Considering I have no idea what Kun is planning, I try to pick an outfit that’s casual but also pretty. I didn’t want to overdo it (it’s only a zoom date after all) but I also wanted Kun to know I tried. I tear my closet apart for about 20 minutes before settling on my favorite white tee and jeans. I also opt to do a little makeup, knowing Kun would appreciate it. Showering, makeup, and hair take up the rest of my time and before I know it, it’s time for our zoom date.

It appears I wasn’t the only one looking forward to the date because even though I logged on a whole 5 minutes early, Kun was already waiting to admit me.

“Someone’s excited.” I tease, proud of the light pink that dusts kun’s cheeks

“I’m the host, what’s your excuse?” He chuckles lightly. “You look gorgeous Sunshine.”

“Not so bad yourself,” my teasing tone barely disguises the obvious want in my voice. Cause Kun. Looks. Adorable. It’s not that he’s dressed up, not at all actually. He’s dressed somewhat similarly to me, drowning in a plain collared long sleeve. The sleeves are long enough to cover his hands, giving him sweater paws that make him appear not only soft, but tiny. His chocolate brown hair is mussed up, only adding to the overall image. To top it all off, he seems to be wearing a little bit of lip balm. I have never wanted to kiss someone so bad in my entire life.

“You frozen there lovebug?” Kun’s amused comment breaks me out of my stupor.

“Nope, just enjoying the view,” I wink nonchalantly once again relishing in the blush rising up Kun’s neck. “So what’s your plan?”

“You should be finding out in about…” He checks his watch dramatically, “5 minutes.” I could only giggle in response as I watched my boyfriend, eyes gleaming with mischief. As I may have mentioned previously: Kun is a dork. He enjoys setting up dates a lot (maybe a bit too much). He likes to come up with weird creative ideas for us to try. It’s one of the things I love most about him. And the way his gaze is flitting every which way and his legs are bouncing all over the place is a clear sign that he’s extremely proud of whatever he’s planned.

A few minutes of mindless chitchat later, I hear the doorbell ring. I give Kun a knowing look as he pretends not to know what’s going on. I open the door to see two boxes of take out from my favorite restaurant. I turn to Kun on the screen.

“You didn’t.”

“Oh, but I did sunshine.”

As I open the delicious smelling box I see that he’d gotten my favorite dish as well. He’d remembered every detail of it. A few tears escape my eyes against my will. Kun seems confused and concerned by my reaction, his beautiful features melting into a frown.

“Did I get something wrong? I swear I checked like 8 times to make sure I just--”

“No Kun it’s perfect,” I smile wetly. “You got everything right baby, I’m just really lucky to have you.” Kun nods understandingly grinning to reveal his dimple, and all of a sudden I’m hit with a wave of sadness and longing. I want nothing more than to be there with Kun, to caress his cheeks and bury my head in his chest and kiss the freckle under his brow that I love so much. I’m hit all at once with the realization that I miss being with Kun, and suddenly the tears are streaming down my cheeks. Kun stays silent, patient as always and it only makes me want to cry more.

“I miss you so fucking much,” I whisper between sobs. My vision is far too blurry to see how Kun is reacting to my outburst. “I hate this stupid quarantine, and the stupid virus, and stupid zoom. I just w-want to hug you so bad kunkun.” My voice breaks at the end of my sobs.

“Aw baby, I know. Any time we do these dates I can’t help but miss everything about you. You mean so much to me and not being able to see you has been torture. But don’t worry too much Sunshine. This is not permanent. I’m confident we’ll be able to see each other again.” Kun’s eyes are practically pouring out affection and genuineness.

“I’m sorry for ruining the date.”

“If you don’t hush right now I’m going to find a way to Zoom slap you,” Kun teased. “You have absolutely nothing to apologize for and you haven’t ruined anything. We can just eat and watch a movie together yeah?”

There on my couch, as I lost count of the hours going by with Kun’s voice in my ears: I realized that despite the unideal situation, we’d be okay.

KUNTEN PIC OF THE DAY:

[justjessame]

Put Me In Coach 2

“He’s watching you,” Mary whispered, as I looked at her in confusion. “Coach Negan has been eye fucking you ever since he walked into the cafeteria.”

I rolled my eyes. “You’re fucking insane.” I let my eyes fall back to the book in my hand. “He’s not looking at me, and if he is, then it’s probably because the random thought of ‘oh shit, have I done inventory lately’ popped into his head.” Eric snickered from beside me. I took a drink from my bottle of water and pretended I was reading. He was staring at me. I could feel it across the crowded room. I just couldn’t acknowledge it. Even though I’m eighteen and technically an adult, he’s still a fucking teacher. And married. A flash of guilt gnawed in my stomach. I couldn’t think of her, his wife.

“If this is insanity, than fuck if I don’t want a dose of what you’re having.” Eric muttered, and then I felt him. Behind me, the musky scent of him, his heat. Fuck.

“Miss Kendall.” That fucking voice of his. It didn’t help that I knew exactly how deep it could get, and just how hot he could sound moaning my name. I licked my lips and felt his hand touch my shoulder.

“Yeah, Coach.” I was happy to hear my voice both steady and not breathless. I looked up at him over my shoulder and smiled. “Is there a problem?”

His eyes were dark. A darkness I was learning very well. “Not a problem, Miss Kendall, a reminder.” I swallowed as he pulled his hand back. “You promised to give me a hand,” I heard Eric snicker again and closed my eyes. “With grading.” I nodded and bit my lip.

“Of course,” I took a deep breath. “I have a free period after lunch.” It was the second semester and I didn’t have his class anymore. The free period was actually an independent study that I was doing, but what’s the point of it if I couldn’t be independent?

Negan smiled down at me. “See you then.” He nodded a parting to my now silent best friends and walked away. I turned back to my book.

“Tell me he’s bent you over his desk and spanked you until you couldn’t sit down comfortably.” Eric practically moaned. “Please throw me that one fucking bone, bitch.”

I shook my head and ignored him. “Come on, Eric,” Mary said, her eye roll evident in her tone. “We’re talking about PERFECT Amara Kendall here. What would Coach Negan have to spank her over?”

“Mary, Mary, Mary,” Eric sounded completely bored with that line. “Remember that Amara fucking Kendall had to retake PE because of her fucking mouth. Wait, has he fucked your mouth?” Damn it. The insatiable curiosity of these two assholes would kill me.

I shook my head and continued to ignore them. “She’s not talking, Eric. Quiet as a fucking tomb.” Mary sounded so put out that I nearly giggled. Nearly. “Unlike us, her BEST FRIENDS, she doesn’t share. Shouldn’t surprise us, I guess, she never shared in kindergarten either.”

That did it. I laughed. “You are such thirsty fucking whores.” I shook my head and sat down my book. “Kindergarten? Really?” I rolled my eyes. “You’re never gonna forgive me for that fucking Barbie doll are you?”

 “It was Ken, bitch, and you wouldn’t share him so I could reenact all my debased ideas.” She was glaring at me and Eric as we laughed. “I had such creativity and it was STARVED because you wouldn’t share.”

 “I saved you from being forced into therapy, you twisted asshole.” I was shaking with laughter. “Seriously, what five year old acts out that kind of shit in kindergarten?”

“A creative one,” Eric snickered. “Creative and had too much access to Skinamax.”

We were all laughing now. Fuck, I loved the two idiots. But I couldn’t share what Negan and I were doing. They knew something happened, but he was STILL a fucking teacher. And I wasn’t going to lose him his job. “You know I want to share, but-” I sighed. “The less you know, the less you could be asked.”

“Do you honestly think that anyone would question us?” Eric scoffed. “You’re an adult, Amara. No one cares.”

“Well, the board might,” Mary shrugged. “What?” Eric had shot her a look. “It’s true. She has a point. He’s a teacher, not HER teacher, but he’s still a teacher.” She took my hand. “Sorry, we’ve been pushing for info, Amara. I think I get it now.” I squeezed her hand. “Doesn’t mean I’m gonna stop giving you shit, but I won’t ask for details.” I rolled my eyes.

“Fine, yeah, me too.” Eric begrudgingly agreed. “But the SECOND we get our fucking diplomas, I want GRAPHIC fucking details. Videos if you have them.”

 I walked to the gym after lunch and grinned as I watched Negan bark out orders to the class. “I’m leaving you all to your own devices, but I swear to Christ if I hear a Lord of the Flies situation going down, I will shut that shit down immediately. Understood?” A round of agreement and he motioned for them to grab the equipment of their choosing.

“Miss Kendall.” He greeted me as I made my way through his students. “Let’s go into my office and we’ll get started with that stack of papers to grade.” The door had barely shut behind him when I turned and met his arms and mouth. Groaning into one another’s searching hands and ravenous mouths, I felt his hands sliding down my back to pull up my skirt over my hips. His fingers met lace and his teeth nipped at my lip. And then the panties met the same fate that each and every pair before them had, luckily I found a place to buy in bulk.

My hands were tugging down the elastic of his shorts, and then as though Eric had wished it, I was bent over the desk. But instead of a spanking, I was getting something better. He slid inside of me fully and then his hand was wrapped around my throat and pulling me back into his chest. Fuck. As we moved together, my head turning to search for his mouth and him anticipating my want and meeting me, I felt that build. The one that had become as natural as breathing to me. The climb toward an orgasm with Negan pounding into me with an expertise that only he had.

Roaring through both of us, I fell forward on the desk with a quiet chuckle as he followed me, his body over top of my own, always so hesitant to pull away. Pull out before he had to, he was completely against that. He wanted to feel me, for as long as we could stay joined, and I loved it. His weight against me, front or back, the feeling of him slowly leaving me. Hell even the mess that he left behind, until both of us could stand and our breaths weren’t pants any longer. Then he’d wipe me clean, kissing my knees or my thigh and smile up at me.

“I’m getting used to this, Amara.” He said, once I was clean and my skirt was down, panties replaced with a spare pair I kept in my bag. “You, this.” He had replaced his own clothes and was sitting in his desk chair. “Fuck if I’m not gonna miss you next year.”

I sighed, and sat on his lap. Letting my head find the crook of his shoulder, I played with the buttons on his polo shirt. “I’m not going far, Negan.” I offered, we’d been having this conversation a lot lately. “Besides,” I swallowed, not wanting to remind him or me of HER. “Maybe it’s for the best.” I offered instead. “I leave, your life gets back to normal.”

He chuckled into my hair. “Normal?” I felt him inhale deeply. “What the fuck is Normal, princess?” I didn’t actually think he was asking me, so I didn’t answer. “Still gonna fucking miss you.”

 I smiled, and tilted my head up so I could look into his face. “I’ll miss you too, Coach.” I winked and he grinned. “Now, are there actual tests to grade, or was this an elaborate farce to get me alone and at your mercy?”

He laughed and opened a drawer filled with paper. “There’s always shit to grade, Amara, you know that.” And then he let me up, and left the office so I could grade his papers while he went back to teaching. I wondered, pulling a red pen out of his drawer, would he really miss me? Or was I just the latest in a long line of students that he’d done this with before?

 “Amara!” I heard a loud male voice yell as I was leaving the school at the end of the day. Looking around I found the source. Joe Malberry. Captain of the wrestling team. I’d gone out on two dates with Joe, he’d asked me to Homecoming and I turned him down. I waited until he caught up with me, wondering what he could possibly want now.

“Hey, Joe.” I smiled up at him. He was broad. In his shoulders and everywhere else. Trust me, I knew. “What’s up?”

He was smiling down at me. His huge body blocked the sun effectively. ‘Hey, Amara, I was wondering, do you have a date yet for the Spring formal?” Ugh, this again. But I stopped myself from a fast no. Why shouldn’t I go to at least a few dances my final year?

“When is it again?” I hadn’t paid any attention to the notices.

“Two weeks from Friday.” He offered, his smile deepening at my interest.

“Sure.” I answered, nodding. “Why not?”

He hugged me and twirled me around making me laugh. “Fucking awesome.” He set me back on my feet and grinned. “Just tell me the color of your dress and I’ll pick out your corsage and make sure we don’t clash.” Shit, he was excited.

“Absolutely, Joe.” I smiled and walked away after promising him to give him details he needed and plans to call him to hash out the plans. I was almost in my car when I felt it. Someone’s eyes on me, and looking up I saw Negan staring a hole into me from outside the gym. Shit.

 Maybe I wasn’t such an adult. If I was, then I probably would have gone over to Negan and discussed what he must have witnessed between Joe and me. I would have just admitted that going to the dance sounded mildly fun. That Joe was a good guy and maybe, if I was feeling particularly brave, I’d admit that Joe and I had, once upon a time, screwed like rabbits.

Or, I could drive the fuck home and pretend he hadn’t seen or had that look on his face. I could force down dinner. I could fake my way through homework. I could take a LONG hot bath and then open up my laptop to look at formal dresses to get an idea of what I wanted to wear. And hairstyles. And shoes. Anything other than looking at my cell phone that had been dinging text message alerts since I drove away.

I knew it was him. It had to be. We’d promised the cell phone was an emergency only thing, but how many times had we broken that rule? And to Negan, this might actually constitute an emergency. Maybe. But I wasn’t nearly ready to look and see what he might be saying or texting. Not yet. I was a coward.

I was printing off a few hairstyle ideas when my phone rang. OK that wasn’t him. He NEVER called. He couldn’t. Not from home. Not where she was.

I tapped the answer button without looking down. “Hello?” I was still clicking through websites and came up short when I heard his voice. Shit.

“Miss Kendall?” Fuck. “I think we’re gonna have to discuss your performance today, privately.”

Fuck, shit, fuck. “Coach, I can explain.” I tried, but he stopped me from continuing.

“Which may have worked if you came to me today, Miss Kendall.” And hadn’t ignored my texts, I heard the unspoken irritation. “I expect you in my office first thing in the morning. Be prepared for-” I waited, swallowing hard. “Just be prepared, Miss Kendall.”

Damn it. He hung up before I could say another word. Which forced me to look at his texts.

Amara, what the fuck?

Young lady, answer me.

Amara, you need to explain what I fucking witnessed earlier.

Damn it, answer me, Amara.

If I don’t get an answer in the next ten fucking minutes, you’re gonna wish you had.

That was the last one. Shit. I should have fucking answered. I should have BRBd him or TTYLd. Something, anything, cause I had a fucking feeling that Eric would be getting a very clear graphic of his fantasy when I couldn’t sit down all day tomorrow.

 I had trouble sleeping. I had trouble waking up. I had a shit ton of trouble getting out of bed and facing the day ahead. I was screwed. And not in any of the most enjoyable ways. I bit my lip and considered how to divert him from the very clear aggravation that he was feeling. First, armor.

I got up, reluctantly, but determined. Pulling a pair of the tightest jeans I owned from a drawer, a pair of boy silky boy short panties, and a strappy sports bra, I had a flash of brilliance. Stepping out of my bedroom, I yelled down the hallway for my dad.

Mom’s head popped out of their bedroom, half her face made up the other still a work in progress. “He’s already left for the day, Mara.” She offered, taking in my unusual outfit. “What did you need?”

 “A sports jersey.” I said, walking toward her. “It’s dress up day at school, you know senior shenanigans.” She was giving me a look of wonder. Shit, why didn’t I play nice at school more with the stupidity. “Doesn’t Dad have a few from when he goes out with the guys?” My dad liked to pretend now and then that he liked silly things like sports.

She nodded, still looking at me like I’d been a victim of a body snatching. “Yeah, come in and go to the far back of his closet.” She sat down at her vanity and glanced at me as I made my way to his closet. “Those jeans, honey, are they-”

“Decent?” I asked, with a snicker. “Sure. If you squint past the painted on fabric and strategic tears.” I was flicking through Dad’s clothes until I spotted it. Baseball jersey for the win. And since it buttoned, I could, once I left the house, unbutton it and show off the very nice and very fetching sports bra I was wearing. “Thanks, Mom.” I offered, dropping a quick kiss on her cheek as I bounced out of her room.

“Amara, do take a change of clothes, just in case.” I rolled my eyes. And my friends wondered why I was the way I was.

“Absolutely, Mom.” I agreed, and went back to my room to finish getting ready.

Hair up in a high ponytail. A pair of blinding white chucks on my feet. Baseball cap I found in the hall closet tucked in my bag. An extra outfit on a hanger, just so my mom wouldn’t lose her shit. And then I was out the door. Early, way earlier than anyone should ever willingly show up at their school, but I was there.

I parked my car and pulled my bag out. Pulling the cap on my head and pulling my ponytail through the hole, I took a deep breath to prepare myself. If nothing else, the fact that I was wearing jeans and a jersey should throw him off his game. And if Negan was off his game, then maybe I could explain myself before I had anything to really worry about. Right? Sure, I promised myself. Negan could be reasonable. He WAS reasonable.

I walked through the empty hallways, the quiet feeling far more surreal and foreboding than any other time before. The silence stretched out before me, my shoes’ soles too soft to even give me the comfort of my own footfalls. I reached the gym before I was ready. Truthfully would I ever be ready to reach him? Nope.

His office door was closed and I almost thought I beat him to the school, but I saw the sliver of light peeking out and nearly groaned. Fuck. I took a moment to give myself a pep talk. Negan was an adult. He just didn’t know how to categorize what he’d seen between me and Joe. Once I explained, leaving out that we’d had sex, he’d be fine. He expected me to do normal senior things. Hadn’t he asked me about Homecoming and Prom? He understood that this was normal. He just didn’t like that I hadn’t told him about it. Calmer, I knocked and heard him tell me to come in.

“Miss Kendall.” He greeted me and my stomach did a flip. Shit he was really truly pissed. “Close the door.” Damn it.

I complied, and when I turned around I felt another flip in my stomach and thanked God I hadn’t had breakfast. Lying in the middle of his desk was the paddle that our principal always referred to as “Spanky” and lovingly reminded us of the day when it was used to hand out the real punishment. Fuck.

“Interesting outfit, Miss Kendall.” Good he’d noticed. “You don’t usually wear jeans. Especially jeans that look like they’ve been painted on.” Fuck. He didn’t sound diverted. He sounded irritated. Shit. “Gonna make the next few minutes take longer than they should, but trust me, they’re gonna happen.” Shit, fuck, shit.

“Negan.” His eyes flashed to mine. OK, nope. “Coach Negan.” I corrected and when he didn’t move I felt comfortable to go on. “Look, I know what you saw yesterday could be interpreted a few ways, but it’s not what you think.” I don’t think, anyway, I added in my head. “Joe was just asking-”

He stood up and I squeaked. Like a mouse. Shit. “What, Miss Kendall, did good ol Joe ask?” Fuck.

I swallowed down another squeak. “He asked me to the spring formal.” I rushed out, he was studying me. “I accepted.” That came out more or less as a breath.

“The spring formal?” Why did he sound so fucking dangerous repeating me? I nodded. “And you said yes?” Another nod. “But you couldn’t take five fucking seconds out of your day to pick up the fucking phone and tell me that?” Shit. Fuck. Shit.

“I just-” What? I tried to ask myself. What didn’t I just? “I didn’t want to-”

Negan had come closer as I was struggling to find words to explain something I didn’t quite understand myself. “You didn’t want to what, Amara?” He was so close I could feel his body heat. “Tell me you were ready to play high school senior? To tell me that you wanted to play in the kiddie pool after telling me that you didn’t want a ‘boy’?” All my words, all coming back to haunt me. Shit.

“It’s not like that, Negan.” I offered, looking up at him. “I just thought, maybe, one fucking dance-”

“You wanted to go to a dance?” He sounded like a broken record, spitting back my words with various levels of disbelief. “With the captain of the wrestling team?” Damn it, I knew he’d get to that part. “Didn’t you turn down good ol Joe at Homecoming?”

“Yes,” I answered, waiting for the next onslaught.

He nodded, and bit his lip. “Why would good ol Joe be willing to risk another possible rejection?” He was studying me again, and I know he saw the faint blush that hit me. “Ah, so good ol Joe was rejected for the dance, but NOT for the DANCE.”

 I fought rolling my eyes. Wasn’t he supposed to be the fucking adult here? “Does that matter?”

“Yes, Miss Kendall, it fucking matters.” His eyes were blazing on mine. “It matters because you’re gonna go to a fucking dance with a guy who WILL expect a repeat of that early performance. It matters because NOW I’m gonna have to fucking go to a fucking high school dance and chaperone it. It matters because I’m gonna fucking brain his stupid ass if he fucking puts his hand lower than your upper back.”

“Negan,” I felt my eyes widening. “You can’t.” He was glaring down at me. “You can’t do any of that. You’ll lose your fucking job.”

“And whose fault is that, princess?” Shit, the heart of the matter. “Take off that ball cap.” I tugged it off and tossed it onto the chair. “Now, unbutton those ridiculous fucking jeans and bend over that desk.” Damn it, fucking Eric’s wet dream for the win. I unsnapped the button and unzipped the zipper.

“Should I-” I started but he shook his head. OK. I leaned over the desktop.

“Face down,” the coolness of the metal touched my cheek. I felt his hands on my waist, and then his fingers on the waistband of my jeans. He began tugging them down, muttering at how tight they were as he worked. “If you fucking thought wearing these fucking pants was going to somehow fucking deter your punishment, sweetheart, I think you’re gonna be fucking upset. Cause it’s increasing the fucking shit, right now.” Fuck. “What the fuck are these?” Oh, the boy shorts. “Princess, where the fuck did you get these fucking things?” His fingers snapped the elastic silk of the panties.

“I don’t know, some store.” I truly had no fucking clue. They were basically toss away period pants if I had to be honest.

“They’re ridiculous too.” He was irritated and only getting more so as he tugged and pulled the jeans down. “These fucking things should be in the goddamn trash. If I didn’t want to murder anyone who might see your naked ass, I’d rip the fuckers off and toss them myself.” Don’t tell him you have a spare set of clothes, don’t tell him, even if that sounded hot as fuck.

I bit my lip when his hands and my jeans and panties met my ankles. The light air against my naked bottom half felt weird, and weirder still when he tossed my dad’s jersey out of his way. “Where the fuck did you get this?” Shit, wasn’t he just fucking curious all over this morning.

“It’s my dad’s.” I answered, and he grunted. “Should I chuck it in the fire, too?”

“Sir.” He corrected. Shit. He was serious.

“Sir?” I asked, hoping that he wasn’t going to go full on Eric’s greatest wet dream ever on me.

“That’s right, Amara. Sir.” I nodded my understanding. “You understand that you asked for this, don’t you, princess?” I nodded again. “Words, Amara.”

“Yes, sir.” I answered, and felt myself get a bit damper. Shit. “I asked for this because I didn’t answer you yesterday, sir.” Fuck if this wasn’t the best fucking bad thing I’d ever done.

“Good girl.” Shit, my stomach clenched at the praise. “Now, since it’s your first infraction, I’m not gonna go too hard on you, but remember this, princess, so you don’t have to experience it again.” Yeah, right.

Spanky the paddle was right beside me, but he didn’t pick it up. Instead, I felt his hand smooth down the skin of my ass and bit my lip. Guess old Spanky was just a fucking prop, I thought, right as Negan brought his hand down full force on my ass. Fuck. I nearly jumped off the desk from the sting. Shit. Shit. Shit.

“Count, princess, you’re getting fifteen.” Fuck was that his favorite fucking number?

“One, sir.” Fuck fuck fuck. And then another smack. And I counted. Each and every fucking one, from one to fifteen. Shit. I could feel the sting and burn. I knew that those fucking jeans were going to constitute as more fucking torture. I was also so wet that all I could possibly wish to take my mind off the literal flames of my burning skin was for Negan to bury himself deep inside of me and take care of my other pain.

“Pull up your pants, Amara.” WHAT? I shot him a look of disbelief over my shoulder. “It’s a punishment, princess.”

No fucking shit. Fuck. I stood carefully and bent over to grab my panties. Shit, this was gonna suck. I took my sweet time tugging the thin silky fabric over my burning ass. OUCH. I let them settle on my no doubt flaming red skin, then reached down for the jeans. This took far more time. More time than it took him to get them down my legs. More time that it took to put them on earlier at my house. I bit my lip and closed my eyes as the denim brushed my ass, even with the slight barrier of those fucking boy short panties. OUCH. Damn it. Once they were up, I buttoned them and zipped up.

When I turned to face Negan, I realized I wasn’t the only one who had enjoyed at least part of my punishment. Without waiting for instruction, I carefully got to my knees. What the hell, why not go full throttle submission? Looking up at him, I tugged his track pants down his hips and careful of his obvious need, I settled them on top of his shoes around his ankles. I watched his face as I rose up higher onto my knees and licked his hard shaft from tip to bottom. Nothing, just watched me. No words, no touch. Just his eyes on me. Well shit. Opening my mouth, I took him inside, using my tongue and then adding my hand for good measure.

Finally after the fourth bob of my head, I felt it. His hips thrusting ever so slightly forward. I worked harder and was rewarded by his hands sliding under my ponytail. And as he finally got into the swing of things, so to speak, his fucking mouth kicked into gear.

“That’s right, princess, take my cock, just fucking like that.” He pushed a bit too far and I gagged, again thankful that I’d had no breakfast. “Take it, sweetheart, take it.” And I swallowed my saliva and him, by fucking accident. Shit. “Oh fuck,” he moaned, and then, like I wasn’t entirely prepared for, he came. Down my fucking throat. That he was down because of a fucking accident.

It was swallow or choke so swallow I did. He started to go limp, but I waited, just as I always did when we finished having sex. And, just like during our normal fuckings, he helped me up and cleaned me up. My face this time. Tugging on my ponytail, he smiled down at me.

“Do you still want to go to the fucking dance?” He asked, but the heat of his anger was almost gone from his voice.

“Yeah, I do.” I answered, leaning against the desk and then hissing at the feeling of burning pain. Shit. “Damn it.” He grinned at me. Oh, sure, you can sit down, fucker.

His fingers brushed my errant bangs away. “Fine.” Was that permission? “I’ll go let Turtle Jones know I’m in for fucking chaperone duty.” Shit was he serious?

“Negan,” I began, but he brushed his lips against mine.

He shook his head when he pulled away. “This is non-negotiable, Amara. You go, I go.” Shit, fuck, shit. “Now get going, class is starting in ten minutes.” Shit. I grabbed my bag and the cap, and as I moved to pass him, he swatted me on my ass. FUCK. “Have a good day, princess.” OUCH.

[revisionaryhistory]

Three Days ~ 40

I got up to make banana bread for my niece. This chapter is just as sweet. Enjoy.

~*~Sebastian~*~

I woke up face down and naked on top of Emma's bed. I turned my head and could see Emma was also face down and naked. She was also using my lower back as a pillow with her arm under my ass. I have no idea how we got here. I remember the blonde with long hair trying to start shit. Then more shots. And more shots. We hadn't driven, so we must have taken an Uber back. I could see towels on the floor, so we must have showered. That's good because we both had to stink after all day in the sun. Her more. I stifled a laugh and felt Emma shift. I said, "Morning." My voice sounded like we’d been drinking all night or I’d started smoking again.

"Morning." Her voice sounded as rough as mine. She started to move then stopped. "I'm hugging your butt like a teddy bear. Interesting."

"Gotta admit, it's a first."

Emma joined me right way on the bed after planting a kiss on my ass. I rolled to my side, mirroring her, "Any idea how we got here?"

"Not really." She cringed, "I remember getting out of an Uber and barely being able to unlock the door."

"There's towels on the floor."

She leaned and sniffed my chest, "You smell nice and clean." Her eyes shifted between both our naked bodies. "Did we have sex?"

I laughed, "Oh, I doubt it." She laughed with me. I ran my hand down her side to rest on her hip, my eyes following. "I may always want you, but I think too drunk to fuck was a thing last night."

She smiled, her single dimple making itself known, "Always, huh?"

"Always." I went to kiss her, but was stopped by her hand on my chest.

"Oh no." She shook her head. "Something has crawled in my mouth and died." She climbed over me and headed to the bathroom. I heard her pee, flush, and turned the water on.

I knocked, "Can I brush too?"

She let me in and made room in front of the sink. We continued talking as we brushed. "How do you feel?"

"Not horrible. A little headache. My finger hurts. How about you?

"Dehydrated. Headache."

"We have brunch with your parents in two hours."

I looked at her in the mirror, "We can push it back. I don't want to cancel."

"No, Advil and some water and I'll be fine." She put her hand over her stomach. "I'll be hungry by then." She finished brushing her teeth, put her tooth brush away, and looked down my body. Emma's hand caressed down my chest to cup my balls. "You're very naked, Mr. Stan."

I almost choked on a mouthful of toothpaste. I spit and rinsed while she continued to fondle me. Thankfully, she waited to stroke my cock. I dropped my toothbrush in the sink with a groan. My hands ran down the silky skin of her back to her ass and I pulled her closer. I stopped a fraction of an inch from her lips, "You're very naked too, Ms. Marcum."

I kissed her and realized I was already hungry.

Two hours later we walked into Jill's Bistro and sat down with my parents. Mom was happy to see both of us. She'd texted me Friday morning to make sure we were still on and to tell me again she liked Emma. I was glad. I love my mom. While her approval of someone I'm going out with isn’t necessary, it is nice. Especially considering how much I liked Emma.

Mom did separate us for brunch. When we got to the table, she and Anthony were seated across from each other. I rolled my eyes as I hugged her, "Traitor."

Mom kissed my cheek, "I can talk to you both." She hugged Emma, "Nice to see you again."

"You too."

I pushed in Emma's chair and kissed her cheek before walking to the other side of the table. This was fine. We were both tall enough for me to stretch out my leg and touch hers. Yes, I am just that ridiculous.

Mom was on Emma's right and immediately noticed her finger, like any good mom would. Emma had left it uncovered to get some air. The blood was gone, but it was still red and looked like it hurt. She said it did. Emma told them about the game and I pulled out my phone to supplement with pictures and video. I smiled watching again, even more with the interest my parents showed. Eventually we talked about other stuff. Food was good. Dessert was incredible. It was a good time. I was still a little dehydrated and tired. Inside the CRV I looked at her, "Are you tired?"

"A little. Why? What do you want to do?" Her smile and the way she's looking at me. Damn.

Shaking my head, I said, "Nothing. I was thinking I was a little tired and figured you really must be."

"Wanna go home and lay on the couch? Read. It's your turn to introduce me to a TV show."

I laughed, "Yeah, it is. You need to turn in your lesson plans too." I remembered.

"Last week. Woo hoo!" She pumped both arms in the air. We were laughing when her phone rang. The CRV screen said, "Dad #2". Emma pointed toward the steering wheel, “Hit answer for me. The one on the left." I hit the button and the call connected. "Hey, dad."

A gravelly voice came through the speakers and my inner fanboy got very excited. My thought that Dad #2 was Ed proved true.

"Hey Emma. How was the tournament?"

"We won!"

"That's fantastic. Congratulations."

"It was fun. I'll send you pictures."

"Can't wait to see them. Did you hurt yourself?"

"Broke off a nail. Nothing major." She looked at me and winked. "I'm being well taken care of."

Thus far the conversation had been a quick back and forth. There was a noticeable pause before Ed started speaking again, "What exactly does that mean?"

"I'm seeing someone. He patched me up when I hurt myself."

I was thinking being a knight in shining armor would get me some points.

"Do you not remember the rules? Do dating before thirty. In the last two weeks have you miraculously turned thirty?"

Nope, no points for me. I'm also docking myself some points because I don't know how old she is. She's got a job and a condo. That’s old enough.

"No, I have not. Wait, he's over thirty." I held up some fingers. "Thirty-six."

"Was that supposed to make it better, Emma? Thirty-six. Fuck, he's not a musician too is he? 'Cause that requires paperwork."

"No, not a musician."

"What's he do?" There was a tone in his voice that told me he knew she was not telling him something.

"He's an actor."

"Not better. Should have never let you move to New York. Actors and musicians everywhere."

"I met him here." She was pointing down like he could see her. They were used to FaceTime.

“Yes or no. If I was to hang up and change to FaceTime would I see him?" He was giving her shit, but his affection for her was clear.

"Of course not, Daddy. I’m in the car. Answering FaceTime would be dangerous."

I let out a barking laugh. The tone of her voice was very Cher from Clueless.

"Ha! Thought so. What’s your name?"

I answered without pause, “Sebastian Stan. Nice to, well, meet you. Sort of."

"Sebastian Stan. S-T-A-N." I nearly laughed again. Fucking Eddie Vedder was Googling me. “That’s why your name sounds familiar. Marvel. What the hell are you doing in Beacon?"

"My parents live here. We met when I was helping them move." Yes, that's me sucking up. I pulled into her drive and put the CRV in park, waiting to cut the engine until we were done with the call.

Ed laugh, "I trust her that you're a nice guy, Sebastian, or she wouldn't have answered the call."

Emma laughed, "Very true. We're home. Now that you two have met can we continue the inquisition tomorrow night. He leaves in the morning."

"Sure. Harper has awards tomorrow, so wait until after school."

"I will. I can congratulate her.  Give the girls and Jill a hug. I love you."

"I love you, too Emma."

Emma put her hand on my arm and leaned over the console to kiss me, "He'll have your phone number, address, and SAG member ID in five minutes. Ten tops."

We kicked off our shoes and headed to the couch. I sat down and she straddled my lap, giving me a kiss. I decided to tell her what I'd thought. "He was giving you shit, but I could tell he really loves you. He sounded more, I don't know, amused, than anything."

She smiled, her tongue sticking out between her teeth. "He was. He's a lot of fun. He did tell me I had to get prior written approval before going out with a musician."

"I don't think he would have signed off."

"Me either."

I kept my arm on her leg, my hand on her hip. My other hand went to her face to guide her in for a kiss. A very long, slow kiss. I kept my hand on her face, "I don't know how old you are."

"Twenty-eight. I'll be twenty-nine on November twenty third."

"Eight years."

She ignored my statement. "I have a confession." This was going to be interesting. "I said I wouldn't Google you, but I had already checked IMDB the day we met. You hadn't said your last name when you introduced yourself and I wanted to make sure you were you I thought you were. Your birthday's on there."

I smiled with how she wasn’t sure who I was, "You're so cute I want to squish you." I hugged her tight, rocking her from side to side.

She was holding onto me and laughing, "Can I look at Google images? I like looking at you."

I un-hugged her where I could see her face. "You can look where ever you want. Promise me you'll ask me about anything."

Her face said no before she did, "I want pretty pretty pictures not articles or gossip. I’m having too much fun getting to know you. I want to learn about you from you."

I dropped both my hands to her thighs. A week ago I didn't touch her like this. "That means more to me than you can possibly imagine."

Emma shrugged one shoulder, tilting here head toward the shrug, "I think you're gonna mean more to me than you can possibly imagine."

Jesus. Maybe twenty-eight is too young to be afraid to say shit like that. I want to know how she's so fearless.

"I have a pretty good imagination."

"We'll both have to wait and see."

A very nice moment was broken by my phone. Something told me to pick it up. FaceTime and I didn't recognize the number. Emma did, "Ed." She climbed off my lap. "I'm going to grab my tablet. Want me to get your book?"

"Yes, please, outside pocket of my bag."

"Be right back."

I answered and waited for Ed's face to show up. "She told me it would take you five, ten minutes max. You're late."

"Everything takes longer on Sunday." He smiled, "My wife tells me I can be intense and overprotective."

"I get it, she's one of your daughters. I think she's pretty special too." I hoped my sincerity played over FaceTime.

He leaned back on whatever he sat on, "If she's letting us meet, she thinks you're pretty special too."

I smiled and nodded, "I hope so." I heard Emma coming down the stairs, "Please tell me you're tougher than her other dad."

Ed laughed, "He's a cupcake."

Emma put her face next to mine where he could see both of us, "Do not scare him. I like him."

Ed shifted his attention to her, "Should you say that in front of him?"

"Don't be silly. He knows. I would never."

There it is! I’ve been waiting patiently and there it finally fucking is. I turned my head and pulled away to see her, "There's the southern accent I’ve been waiting for!"

Ed smirked, "Wait until she goes back to Georgia. You've got a good two or three days before she loses the accent. The harder she tries the worse it gets."

"Which is why I don't try."

Indignant, but still a little Southern. I snickered. She turned her head and kissed my lips. I winced, “Don't do that. I think I was winning him over."

A young female voice came through, "Is that Sissy?"

"Hi Livvy."

A teenage girl with long straight hair moved in beside her dad. She looked confused, shifting her eyes between us. She settled on me and her mouth dropped open, "Bucky?"

I loved when kids called me by my character, "Who the hell is Bucky?”  A smile lit up her face, “How are you, Olivia? Emma’s told me a lot about you."

Attention back to Emma. "Sissy, you're dating Bucky?"

"I am."

Olivia's hand covered her mouth, "Oh shit!" She pushed her dad's shoulder, "Do not scare him off. I want to meet him. It's six months to Hawaii. Emma, you keep him happy and I'll make dad be nice. I love him." She was looking at me.

"Thank you."

Ed was glaring at me and holding up a finger. "One, Seb, I have a one daughter limit."

"I'm not willing to trade. I like the one I've got."

He smirked, "I'm starting to like you, but it could turn and I will find you."

"I'II try not to give you reason."

Another face came to the other side of Ed’s face. Obviously, his beautiful wife. She looked at me then Ed, "Have you two finished the pissing contest?"

Ed smile at his wife, love filled his face, "We've got a truce."

We stayed on FaceTime for a while longer and I was a little sad when we hung up. Emma stood up and I turned enough for me to grab and pull her over the couch into my lap. Her flailing and squeals made me laugh. I buried my face in her neck, kissing and tickling her. She tried to fight back and I held her wrists. Despite her wiggling I was able to kiss her. That stopped her. But I wasn't wanting serious or to sit here making out. I was still in fanboy mode. "I want to get on a plane and go to Seattle. That was so much fun, even the parts where Ed looked like he wanted to murder me. I got to see you with your family and finally," I looked to the ceiling and shook my fist, "got to hear your southern accent."

"We do have a lot fun together. Not that my parents and sister aren't fun, but it is different."

"Sure. I loved you telling Ed FaceTime would be dangerous. You two going back and forth."

Emma laughed, "We watch Clueless every New Year’s Day."

I punched my thumb and forefinger together, "Spot on."

She combed her fingers through my hair, "Do you realize me seeing you with your family is just as fun for me? Your mom sending you to the other side of the house and watching you two was great. You reverting to a little boy was amusing." She did the thing in my hair again. "And very sweet."

We like each other's family (at least the half I've met) and we like each other. Things are working out well. I rearranged her a little on my lap, "Can we catch up on some making out?"

"Absolutely."

[turning-dreams-into-chaos]

Lost Without Her: Journey Home (Last Part)

*Not My Gif*

Summary: It’s been 5 years since half the world was snapped away, 6 months since her mom, Natasha sacrificed herself and the world came back, but how does she handle it after her world flips upside down?

Post Date: 12-25-19

Paring: Peter Parker x Romanoff!Reader

Word Count: 3K

A/N: Ahh! It’s over! I’m sad now... also if you see editing mistakes, you know, oh well. I edited this at like 3 in the morning... 😂

~Master~

~Lost Without Her Master~

Previously...

“Peter.” You repeated once again as he looked towards you, his eyes riddled with sleep as you smiled. “I want to go home.”

Peter wasn’t sure if he heard you right as he looked at you, the small smile on your face being the only evidence that he was right. “What changed?” He asked, completely dumbfounded as you sighed, laying down on the roof. Peter, rather reluctantly, copied you and focused on the moving clouds in the sky.

“I think it’s time I faced reality. My mom wouldn’t have wanted this for me. She wanted me there, back with people who loved me.” You moved your head, locking eyes directly with Peter as his dumb grin spread across his lips. “Who care about me.”

He reached over to you, grabbing your hand and squeezing before pulling you off the ground. “Then what are we waiting for? Let’s go back home.” Before you could protest, Peter already led you down the steps and standing in front of Clint.

He was fast asleep on the couch, holding the picture of you and your mom in one hand and his phone in the other. The screen lit up as a text from his wife, Laura came through.

Y/N will come back. She’s family, and you don’t give up on family.

You smiled at Peter with a warmth you hadn’t felt in a long time before nudging Clint awake, watching him rub his eyes before focusing on the two of you. His eyes darted back and forth as Peter nodded at him, grabbing your hand with a soft squeeze.

“Come on Uncle Clint. Time to get you back to your wife.” Clint looked like an idiot as he stood up, throwing his arms around you fast you staggered backward, thanking everyone that Peter was there.

“Let’s go home then.” He muttered and the next thing you knew, you were on a jet heading back to the compound. No one was around by the time you got back, everyone out on their own things as Peter took you up to your room.

“No one touched it. We all hoped you’d come back.” You threw yourself on the bed, missing the comfort it brought you as you patted for Peter to join you. He raised a brow at you as you laughed, throwing your head back into the myriad of pillows as he climbed onto the bed.

“Do you think I made the wrong choice?” You asked as you snuggled into his side, relaxing in his warmth as he sighed.

“No.” He answered truthfully and with such a conviction you dropped the conversation, knowing that Peter was someone who’s opinion you cared for dearly. The two of you drifted off in sleep after your long night and a few hours later you you found yourself awake before Peter, mesmerized in the rhythm of his breathing.

“FRIDAY?” You whispered into the air, missing the A.I as she spoke.

“Welcome back Ms. Romanoff. How can I help you?”

“Is anyone else in the tower?” FRIDAY told you it was clear as you pushed yourself off the bed, kissing Peters cheek before leaving the room. Your feet padded against the ground as you walked down the hall a little, standing outside the door that used to be your mothers. A small push of a door and you were in her room, all her memories, all the pain just came flooding back to you and you couldn’t tell if coming back really was the best choice before a pair of arms around your torso, bringing your back against his chest as you calmed down a little to turn around and see Peter in front of you.

“I thought I could handle this, but I couldn’t.” You whimpered, she’s moving around the room faster than Peter thought possible. He cupped your cheek, getting you to focus on him as you relaxed almost instantly.

“It’s okay. I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.” He promised as you nodded, being your hands up to hold his instead of having him hold your face. He reached over, grabbing something off the table next to you as you raised your eyes. “Here. Clint and I found this a while back. We thought, if you ever came back, we’d give it to you.” You looked at the silver bracelet in Peters hand. It was something your mom had done a few years after you were born. It was a simple silver band honestly, the only thing about it was she had your names imprinted on it. You lost all words when you saw it and let Peter put it on your wrist.

It was her. It was like she was still with you.

“Ms. Romanoff, Mr. Parker. Mr. Wilson and Ms. Danvers are requesting your presence.” FRIDAY said as you followed after Peter, entering a conference room. Everyone was there, all of them looking at you eagerly as you entered. Their family member came home. Thank god.

The ‘meeting’ didn’t last long, it was basically just to welcome you back and for everyone to know you were alright. You were a bit overwhelmed in all honesty that the moment you could, you pulled Peter out of there, heading back to your room.

“Y/N!” Scott called as you turned around to leave. Peter and you both turned back, seeing him pull out a red container from his jacket pocket. “Can we talk?” He asked, looking towards Peter before you again. You told Peter you’d meet up in a few as he nodded, kissing your head before leaving you and Scott to talk. “I’m sorry about your mom.” He told you as you took a deep breath, stretching your mouth into a line. “I saw how close you two were.” You were beginning to wonder why he pulled you aside when he opened his hand up, showing you the container he grabbed earlier.

“Pym Particles?” You mumbled, looking between the man and the vial. Scott just nodded with a happy smile as he put it your hand. “What am I doing with these?”

“You’re a good kid Y/N. You just went through a tough situation. Hank Pym made a few more particles after everything. I might’ve stolen a couple for you. Go see your mom.”

You didn’t know what to say. After everything that happened you could see your mom again. Scott patted your shoulder as you stared transfixed at the vial, your mouth dropped open as wide as it could go. Scott chuckled at your reaction before leaving you alone.

“Y/N? What’s that?” Peter asked as he jogged over to you. You handed him the container, bringing your hand up to rub your face as you look to where Scott left.

“They’re uh, Pym Particles. It’s what we used to go back in time and save everyone.” You told him as Peter furrowed his brow, getting a better look at them.

“But why did Mr. Lang give them to you?” He asked and handed the vial back to you. You took a deep breath, laughing a little in shock as your eyes opened wide.

“To go back in time and see my mom.” Peter’s smile fell a little as you spoke and it felt like someone punched him in the gut.

“You’re- Are you going back?” He stammered out, playing with his shoes against the ground.

You frowned, reaching out to grab his hand. “Peter...”

“I think you should do it.” He admitted, shocking you both but he stood straighter, nodding his head. “Y/N, your mom meant the world to you. This?” He held your wrist, bringing it up to show the particles wrapped around your fingers. “This is your one chance at seeing her again. I think you should do it.”

Everything happened so fast after that. Peter was the jumpstart you needed and now, here you were standing on the platform you last saw your mom in one of the suit. Your legs were bouncing as you stared into his eyes, biting your lip.

“Ok, everything’s ready.” Bruce said, finishing up the final necessity of your time travel. Scott gave you a thumbs up, winking when you took a deep breath. Clint and Peter stood next to him, both looking rather uneasy but knew there was nothing they could do about it.

“You ready Y/N?” Clint asked as Peter crossed his arms over his chest, bringing one of his hands up to bite his nails. You nodded your head, sending each person a smile before settling on Peter.

“See you in a minute.” You whispered to them all before your helmet covered your face. Peters eyes were the last thing you saw before the ground disappeared, blue surrounding you completely.

The feeling was familiar as you floated through time and space, but it didn’t make it any less nerve wrecking. Your watch directed you exactly where you needed to go.

New York City, 2012.

The moment your feet touched the ground you hid the suit, chancing back into your Black Tee and skinny jeans. It was quieter than you expected, the world having just survived Loki’s destruction thanks to the Avengers. You stood outside the Stark Tower as you heard faint giggles coming from around the corner, and letting your curiosity get the better of you, you rounded the building, freezing immediately as you caught sight of a head of curly red hair, sitting on the ground.

“Mom?” You blurted without thinking as she turned around to look at you. It was only then you saw the little girl on the ground in front of her laying on a picnic blanket.

“I’m sorry?” Your mom said as she looked you up and down. You remembered this moment, your mom had taken you out for a picnic after everything happened with the avengers. She was so worried about you and you had no idea anything was going on until years later. Realizing you had been staring for far to long you shook your head, biting your lip to keep from crying. “Sorry, It’s just, you look like someone.” You admitted sheepishly, never looking away from her face. She looked exactly as you remembered, only a little younger and her hair a lot shorter. But she was just as beautiful.

Natasha nodded her head, keeping one eye on her daughter as she watched the strange girl in front of her. “Your mother.” She stated rather than asked and you nodded your head fast, looking at little you playing without a care in the world.

You never would’ve guessed she’d turn out to be a killer.

She watched you, noting the way she felt attached to you as you played with your fingers, eyes moving from her to her daughter. “Where is your mother?”

Right in front of me, you wanted to say. But you couldn’t, if you tell her what happened there is no saying the damage it could do to the world. Hell, the universe.

“She’s dead.” You finally told her, your voice fading as you cleared your throat. Natasha felt her heart break a little for you as she glanced down to the 6 year old playing in front of her. Feeling the need to be closer to her, you moved a little gaining the attention of little you as you sucked in a breath.

“Hi!” Little You shouted as you chuckled, watching your mom wince from the noise. You always were a loud child. “I’m Y/N Romanoff.”

You gave her a small smile, meeting your mothers eyes before you crouched down to her level. “Hi, I’m...” you paused.

What were you supposed to say? You couldn’t tell her your name was also Y/N, your mom would get too suspicious.

You tried to come up with a name, an alias, something to call yourself before you remembered the little girl who sent you on the right path. “I’m Ana. Ana... Parker.”

Natasha looked between the two girls in front of her, finding the odd similarities between them. The way both of your smiles matched, or how you both threw your head back as you laughed, or the way you knew exactly how to talk to Y/N. But it wasn’t until Natasha saw the bracelet on your wrist before her breath caught in her throat.

“How old are you Ana?” She asked you as you swallowed, adverting your gaze.

“17.”

She nodded before turning to the girl who decided braiding your hair would be a good idea. “Hey Baby, why don’t you go get mommy some flowers over there.” She pointed to bush not far from you all and you watched yourself skip over to it. “She always was so trusting of strangers.” Your mom told you, making you giggle, shifting in your seat to look at her. “But You already know that, don’t you?” She asked as your whole body froze.

“I-I don’t- what do you mean?” You stammered out, trying to find any way other than admit the truth. Natasha grabbed your arm, pushing the sleeve of your jacket up to reveal the bracelet identical to the one she wore around her wrist.

“Tell me the truth.” She said.

So you told her.

Everything.

You were crying at the end, your hands keeping permanent residence in your palms as you told her about the snap, the 5 years, Vormir, and about everything afterwards. Your mom ran her hand up and down your back, telling you it’s going to be okay.

“But It’s not!” You stressed, falling into her lap. “I lost you, mom. I never even got to say goodbye. You were just gone.” Natasha tried to stay strong as long as she could, but seeing this girl, seeing you cry on her lap about not being able to say goodbye broke her. Tears fell onto your face from hers as you sat up, wrapping your arms around her neck. “I’m sorry mom. I’m sorry I turned out like this. You whispered in her ear as she pulled away, holding your face in her face.

“Don’t apologize. If that little girl over there turns out half as good as you had, then I’ll be happy.” You let out a strangled sob, curling up in her arms again as little footsteps came from next to you.

“What happened?” A small voice asked as you wept, burying your face in the crook of your moms neck as Nat shushed You.

“Everything’s fine Baby. Ana and I just needed to talk.” You didn’t hear any from either of them as a pair of small arms encircled the two of you, making you and Nat laugh as you clung to her as if your life depended on it.

You wanted to stay there forever, bask in the feeling of your mother’s arms wound around you but you knew you couldn’t.

“I’m going to miss you.” You whispered in her ear, feeling her hold loosen as you separated and your younger self went back to picking flowers.

“You’re leaving?” She asked almost surprised. Could you stay? Could you leave behind everyone? Clint and Scott, Bruce And Sam, Carol and Bucky? Peter?

No. You couldn’t leave him.

“I have someone waiting for me. Back... home.” Natasha caught the glint in your eye as you wore your sad smile, moving to hold your hand.

“I’m sorry Y/N. For everything.” She pressed as kiss to your temple as you wiped away a few more tears.

“I love you mom.”

She gave your hand a squeeze, “I love you too Y/N.” You both stood up, sharing one more hug as you left, turning around to see your mother standing in front of you in person for the very last time. Ever.

“Goodbye.” You whispered as your suit covered your body, the mask falling into place and hiding your freshly made tears as Nat watched you regretfully disappear.

The moment you were back in your time your suit was off and you were falling into Peters arms, his wrapping around your body as he held you.

“I thought you weren’t going to come back.” He was choked up as he spoke in your ear, making your stomach drop as he cried. You couldn’t say anything until he out you down, your feet hitting the ground as you pulled your lips to his, savoring the comfort he brought as you pulled back, gasping for a breath.

“Of course I would’ve. You guys are my home.” You pushed his wavy hair out of his face, looking directly in his eyes. “You’re my home.” The feeling couldn’t have been any more mutual for Peter. This girl he’s known for years and always been able to be himself around grew up right before his eyes and he couldn’t imagine a life without her.

“I’m really glad you came back.” He told you as you nodded, slightly giggling from the blush on his face as you pecked his cheek.

Clint came up behind you, tapping your shoulder and ripping your attention away from Peter. “Hey Kid. Can we talk?” You nodded, letting him lead you away from everyone. “You sure you made the right choice? You don’t want to stay with your mom? Pull a Rogers on us?” He joked as you smiled, appreciating the homeliness he provides you.

“My mom was hero. She died a hero. No matter how much I’m hurting, I can’t take that from her.” He nodded, knowing exactly what you meant.

“Are you going to be okay?” Honestly, who know if you were ever going to be okay. You just knew if you surrounded yourself with the right people, then maybe you’d have a chance. You glanced over at Peter, seeing him stand with Bruce and Scott as they try to teach him some time travel basics. He looked like a kid being reprimanded by his parents as you bursted out laughing, catching Peters attention as he looked up, seeing your dopey smile as blushed even harder.

“Yeah. Yeah Uncle Clint, I think I’m going to be fine.”

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[bittysvalentines]

The Stranger the Better

From: @hockeydyke

To: @bitty-smol

Summary: Kent’s had a bad day and he figures date night with Bitty will improve his mood. But when Bitty watches a hot stranger get stood up, he decides to invite the man over to join him and Kent for the night. The only problem? Kent knows the guy.

Rating: T

Tags: Alternate universe- no one plays hockey, Established Eric “Bitty” Bittle/Kent “Parse” Parson, Eric “Bitty” Bittle/Kent “Parse” Parson/Jack Zimmermann, Misunderstandings

Kent hadn’t had the best day so far.

All things considered, though, he was doing a pretty good job of holding it together. In fact, he was actually proud that he hadn’t snapped at his boyfriend at all despite his bad mood, because he was still feeling rational enough to know that he didn’t actually want to push Bitty away or do anything to make things worse. Instead, he was trying to ignore it and go about his daily routine as usual.

And sure, maybe it wasn’t the best thing in the world for Kent to push down all his feelings and frustrations, but Bitty had a tendency to pick up the moods of the people around him, and Kent didn’t want to make Bitty grumpy just because he had the misfortune of being both physically and emotionally close to a particularly pissy Kent Parson on what could otherwise be an entirely pleasant Friday night.

So Kent had texted Bitty during work and suggested a low-key dinner date, because enchiladas and a couple happy hour drinks from Cactus Cantina across the street from their apartment certainly couldn’t make things worse. All Kent knew was that the place was casual, the dessert menu was up to Bitty’s standards, and the drink selection rotated often enough to keep him happy, so it was a win for both of them, and they usually ended up there at least once a week.

And that’s what brought Kent to where he was currently, sipping a half-priced strawberry swirl margarita and pouting because his boyfriend wasn’t paying attention to him. This was particularly offensive to Kent since Bitty was busy looking over Kent’s shoulder at some hot guy who’d sat down on the other side of the room around when they’d arrived. The nerve of it all. Sure, Kent and Bitty had an open relationship, but that didn’t mean that Kent never got jealous-- especially when he was two margs in and in need of attention as he tried to tell an entertaining story about Jenna from Marketing.

Bitty rested his chin on his hands and made heart eyes in the hot guy’s direction again, and Kent finally gave up and sighed as loudly as he could get away with in public. “Come on,” he said, sounding only slightly whinier than he’d intended. “Is this guy really that hot? You’ve been staring at him for ten minutes.”

He began to turn, but Bitty darted his hands out and grabbed the collar of Kent’s shirt to keep him from doing it. “I swear to god, Kent. Do not look at him right now. It’d be so obvious that we’re staring.”

Kent threw his hands in the air. “Alright, alright! I’m not looking, okay? You can describe him to me.” He stared in front of himself instead, at the turquoise accent wall and exposed brick and generic cactus-themed decor. “See, not looking, so paint me a damn picture. But make it a sexy picture, at least.”

Bitty leveled Kent with a stare. “You’re ridiculous,” he said, but he did take another good look over Kent’s shoulder. “He’s got gorgeous blue eyes and cheekbones that could cut glass. Honestly, he looks familiar. I feel like I’ve seen him somewhere before.”

“What kind of familiar?”

“Like, B-list reality TV star famous. Or maybe some kind of modeling? He has the bone structure for it. He’s easily the hottest person here, other than us, obviously.”

“Obviously,” Kent repeated. “And he’s seriously been alone this whole time?”

“Yes! The waitress has checked up on him, like, five times. Poor thing,” Bitty said, frowning. “Someone definitely stood him up. We should go see if he wants to come sit with us to take his mind off of it.”

“Are you kidding me? I bet he got stood up because he’s an asshole.”

“Kent.”

“What if he’s a serial killer?” Kent said, then sat up straighter and poked at Bitty’s forearm. “Even worse-- what if he’s the kind of guy who golfs on weekends?”

“Oh, shush. You’ve been such a grump today,” Bitty said, which, ouch, but true. Maybe Kent wasn’t as good at hiding his feelings as he thought, which was possibly something that he should talk to his therapist about. “We’re going to do something nice and we’re going to feel good about it.”

Feel good. A Freudian slip, or maybe a complete coincidence, but it was enough for Kent to jump to a conclusion that he felt pretty good about. He grinned.

“You just want us to have a threesome with him, don’t you?”

They stared each other down for a few moments. Bitty had a decent poker face, but Kent had known him for long enough to recognize the faint pink blush on his cheeks as a dead giveaway that he was right.

Finally, Bitty gave in. “Okay, fine, I think we should invite him home with us. But once you see him, you’re gonna agree with me. He’s exactly your type.” And before Kent could speak, he added, “Your other type, sweetheart. Not like me at all.”

“Big guy?”

“Mm,” Bitty hummed, gazing over Kent’s shoulder and nodding, chin resting in his hands again. “Thighs for days. Dark hair, very mysterious. Could definitely play a vampire in a movie, but like, a vampire who works out.”

“Fuck, okay. Invite him over,” Kent said, just as their waitress passed by again. While Bitty stood and headed out of Kent’s view, Kent waved her over so she could get him another margarita. She brought the drink out immediately. Kent was just lifting it up to his mouth for a sip when Bitty returned, smiling and bouncing on his toes as he sat back down across the table from Kent.

And then next to him, because Kent Parson’s life was a nightmare or at least a mildly uncomfortable stress dream, Jack Zimmermann sat down, looking stunningly handsome but also sheepish and shy right up to the moment when he met Kent’s eyes. Immediately, Jack’s annoyingly perfect face collapsed into a frown, looking for all the world like he’d seen a ghost.

At least, that’s what Kent felt like, because here was the same Jack Zimmermann who Kent had been moping about all day, after seeing on Facebook that morning that he’d moved back to town after more than five years away. Kent hadn’t seen him in person for nearly as long, since the last time he’d made a pitiful attempt to win Jack back at the Zimmermann family holiday party was just a month before he’d met Bitty. This was that Jack Zimmermann, back in his life without any warning.

It was all Kent could do not to spit out his entire mouthful of tequila and sugar, and the only reason he didn’t was because his shirt was white and he didn’t feel like spending his evening trying to remove a pink stain from it, but God, he wanted the drama of it.

Bitty dove right into introductions, seemingly unaware of Kent’s hopefully well-disguised mental and emotional crisis. “Jack, hon, this is my boyfriend, Kent. Kent, this is Jack. He just moved in across the street from here.”

Kent swallowed. His drink felt like it had gone stale in his mouth. “We’ve met,” he said, dry.

“Oh, really?” Bitty asked, looking up at Jack again, narrowing his eyes.

Jack didn’t say anything at all. Instead, while he sat there slack-jawed and wide-eyed, Kent had to explain what was going on. “This is Jack Zimmermann,” Kent said, trying to use his eyes to convey his sheer panic to Bitty. “I played hockey with him in high school,” he said, because that was easier than saying that Jack was the one who broke his heart, and anyway, Bitty knew the entire story and would be able to infer.

Bitty continued to force a smile. “Goodness! Well, I really walked right into that one, huh? No wonder you looked so familiar,” he said, patting Jack’s arm in a way that Kent knew was meant to be both comforting, but actually made Jack look like he was about to implode.

“Eugh,” Jack started, helpful as ever, and something about his rich tenor made Kent’s blood feel warm. It was also possible that the tequila had just hit. “I can go. I don’t want to, um, upset anyone. Sorry.”

“You don’t have to! We’d still be glad to have you join us,” Bitty said. “I know that Kent has so much he’d love to talk to you about, and I’m sure it’s the same on your end of things!”

“Bits,” Kent hissed. He wasn’t sure if he’d ever been betrayed this badly. Bitty was definitely sleeping on the couch tonight, but he couldn’t say that right now, because that would probably look bad in front of Jack.

Kent didn’t want that, probably. In fact, he wasn’t at all sure what exactly he did want from Jack now, at this point in his life, at age 25 and happy with his boyfriend, job, cat, apartment, and basically every other aspect of life that showed that he had proudly moved on from Jack Zimmermann.

And yet Kent couldn’t help but let his mind drift to how happy he was that he hadn’t had time to change after work, because he looked pretty damn good in his slacks and button-down. He wasn’t wearing a hat, but he had spent a very long time in front of the restroom mirror touching up his hair after his lunch break, so he felt pretty confident that it looked good right now. Comparatively, this was a much better way of running into Jack than, say, running into him during a late-night grocery run when Kent was wearing ratty sweatpants and a shirt with a picture of his cat on it.

Kent thought he looked okay. And he did want Jack to know that he was okay.

Jack was still frowning, and the worry lines in his forehead and around his eyes were deeper than they used to be. His eyes were also, somehow, so much more blue than Kent remembered, as if time had somehow erased their intensity. After a moment, Jack cleared his throat, stilted and awkward, and said the one thing that could convince Kent to give this a shot: “I’ve missed you.”

It was too much.

“Yup,” Kent said, standing up fast enough to knock into the table and jostle it, loudly shifting the plates and glasses and fake cactus on top of it. “I gotta hit the bathroom. Bitty?”

Bitty stood, much more graceful, and slid out of the booth. “It seems like I also have to use the restroom. Stay here and we’ll be right back,” he said, and something in his tone was commanding enough that Jack obediently remained seated and didn’t argue.

Kent pushed through the main room of the restaurant and back to the hallway where the restrooms were located and closed the door once he and Bitty were both in the one-stall men’s bathroom. He took stock of the situation: shockingly he wasn’t having a panic attack, but he was still feeling thrown off and almost dazed.

“I think I’m in shock. Could I literally be in medical shock right now? Am I crying?” he said to his own reflection in the mirror, eyes wet and hair wild. His hair had cowlicks, it seemed, remained tamed. Over his shoulder, he could see mirror-Bitty facepalm, then move closer so he could pat Kent’s shoulder.

“Kent, honey,” Bitty started, then paused as Kent leaned over the sink and splashed water in his face, hoping to refresh himself. “I love you, but you really have zero common sense. You’re getting your shirt all wet.”

“Good!” Kent said. “Does it look like I’m crying? Because I’m totally not crying.”

“You don’t look like you’ve been crying because you’ve basically trained yourself not to cry properly, which is absolutely not healthy, but I’m not going to lecture you about it right now,” Bitty said. “But even if you were, it’d be fine! I’m sure he’s freaking out just as much as you are right now!”

“Is this a pep talk, or are you trying to make me feel guilty?” Kent asked. “Because I don’t feel guilty. He ignored me for years, Bits. It never meant anything to him.”

“Kenny.” Bitty grabbed Kent by the shoulders. Kent could feel them flex and press into his shirt as Bitty raised up slightly onto his toes. It was a habit he’d developed from years of trying to close their three-inch height difference, and the familiarity of it lulled Kent’s pulse to a more reasonable pace. “You’ve been wanting closure with him for as long as I’ve known you. I know he broke your heart. But you’re both adults now and I think you’re finally mature enough to talk about it, so why don’t we give it a try?”

Kent leaned forward until Bitty understood what he wanted and wrapped his arms around him in a proper hug. He sighed. “Yeah, okay. Even though I hate it when you’re right.”

“I’m always right,” Bitty said, giving Kent’s back one final pat and then gently pushing him back out of the restroom and into the main floor of the restaurant.

For the first time, Jack smiled. “Did you spill a glass of water on your shirt?” he asked.

“Don’t worry about it,” Kent said. “What really matters is that my boyfriend thinks you’re hot. Can you buy him a drink and also explain why the fuck you’re back in town?”

“Oh,” Jack started, then faltered. “I guess, I-- well. I got a new job.” He took a deep breath, then turned to Bitty. “Sorry, what would you like to drink?”

“Just a regular margarita, thank you,” Bitty said, sliding into the booth next to Jack. “So, Mr. Zimmermann. Please tell us all about this new job of yours.”

And so Jack did. Kent was quiet during their first round of drinks, listening and watching and learning about this new, older Jack Zimmermann. He was still reserved and still a little bit slow on the uptake when it came to the jokes and slang that Kent and Bitty easily tossed around, but he also cracked a few jokes of his own, which was something he never used to do when they were teenagers. He was more relaxed, too: although Kent spent several minutes watching Jack’s hands, he didn’t see them shake at all.

Their conversation flowed easily enough that two hours passed without Kent noticing. He only realized that it was close to ten-- closing time-- that their waitress had started to hover around the table, pacing at the edge of Kent’s line of vision. At ten, she shuffled up to the table, but didn’t say anything yet. The girl was young, probably in high school, and Kent felt bad for her. He’d hated waiting tables, too, back when he’d done it in college. He looked at Bitty, then at the waitress, trying to subtly let him know that it was time to go.

Bitty nodded, and then, under the table, kicked Kent. It was all Kent could do to keep from yelping, but he somehow managed it and shot a glare in Bitty’s direction, thankful that Jack was oblivious and rambling happily about his photography. Bitty kicked Kent again. Clearly, it was up to him to decide how they were going to end the night.

“Alright,” Kent said, before his leg had to sustain any more damage. He waved the waitress closer and motioned for the check. “How about we move this to our place? You can meet my cat, Zimms.”

Jack looked up. “Really?”

“Yeah, really,” he said, accepting the check and sliding his card into the holder before either of them could stop him. It was a convenient way for him to avoid eye contact.  “I don’t know if you want anything like that, and if you want to just ignore me so we go back to pretending each other doesn’t exist, I could get over that too.”

“But,” Bitty prompted, kicking Kent again.

“But I’d like it if you’d come home with us,” Kent said, finally looking up from where he’d been fidgeting with his debit card.

It was dim in the restaurant this late at night, the colorful string lights and candles doing little against the dark outside, but Jack’s eyes were shining. He nodded, thoughtful. “This was nice. I’d like that too.”

“Thank God,” Bitty said. “Okay, let’s get out of here. I’m dying to get out of my work clothes,” he said, giving Jack a wink that made him choke on his last sip of the single pint of beer he’d been nursing all night.

As they left the restaurant, Jack and Kent walked on either side of Bitty, who looked as pleased as the cat who’d gotten the cream. “Told you we’d feel good about this,” he said, knocking his hips against Kent’s own and smiling, and that’s when Kent realized what should have occurred to him the moment that Bitty invited Jack over to their table.

That little shit knew who Jack was all along.

“Oh, man,” he said, throwing his arm around Bitty’s shoulder. He nuzzled his nose against Bitty’s ear before blowing in it and laughing when Bitty squealed. “You’re lucky I love you.”

[nicolewoo]

SCOTTISH KING

Summary: Drew McIntyre has returned to RAW, and it's Y/N's job to make him look great. Now if he can just stop ruining it......

Pairing: Drew Mcintyre x Reader

Warnings: Language, Erection

Working as a seamstress in the WWE was a hectic, sometimes stressful and wonderful job. My boss, Sandra Gray was amazing. She was strict and demanded near perfection, but she also praised more often than she corrected. I understood why. The ring attire HAD to be strong, stretchy, and often sparkly. One costume slip could ruin a wrestler's reputation and would surely get the company in trouble with cable networks. Sandra had earned my respect, as well as the respect of everyone at WWE. The longer I worked for her, the more responsibilities she gave me, and I loved it.

Being on the road is not always fun. It's often lonely and always exhausting. I thrived on the stress though. I always had.

So when Sandra came to me with a pile of black leather, a box of metal and a notebook of sizes and a design for a coat, I was more than happy to take on the challenge.

“Can you handle this for me?” She asked as I reviewed the rough sketches and materials.

I flipped through the book, “Absolutely,” I assured her.

“Normally I would handle this one myself, but I'm just too backed up tonight. Can you get this done by Friday?”

That was going to take up any free time I could carve out for myself, but again.... I'm a glutton for punishment. I thrived on stress, and I thrived on Sandra's praise. “Yeah. I should be able to do that.”

“I know it's a big project. If you need help, grab Henry.” That at least comforted me a bit.

I nodded in agreement and starting planning how to handle the project.

The notebook was labeled Talent: Drew McIntyre. Drew McIntyre? Drew.... yes.... I remember him. I wasn't even working here when he wrestled with the WWE, and my memory was hazy, but I was certain I'd recognize him when I saw him. I grabbed my phone out of my pocket and googled the wrestler.

As the images loaded, I realized that yes, I knew Drew. I had liked his wrestling, well..... and those dimples... and eyes.... and chest..... and...... I liked watching him wrestle, but he just disappeared one day, and I hadn't seen nor heard of him since. As I studied the pictures of young Drew from his time in WWE in 2007, I realized I was going to like working on this project for all the wrong reasons. He was a handsome devil. BUT.... But I'm a professional. I can do this.

Putting my phone away, I got to work cutting the leather, matching the metal pieces to the sketch Sandra had done, putting together a floor length black leather coat dotted with spikes and other metal. It really was a HUGE project, but I was up to the task.

I got so wrapped up in the project, I was oblivious to the time. A member of the venue's security knocked on the door and told me they were closing. I wasn't really at a stopping point, but I didn't have a choice. One thing was for certain, I needed to meet with Drew for a couple of measurements. I'd shoot him a text in the morning.

I returned to my hotel room and crashed. I dreamed of a huge giant of a man with a smooth chest and straight long brown hair. I dreamed of hazel eyes and leather and metal spikes. I dreamed of his giant hands around my waist, over my breasts, cupping my ass. I woke suddenly knowing only 1 thing. I had to cum NOW. I had dreamed in so much detail, I was on the verge of a climax. I slid my hand to my clit, and no more than a minute later, I came hard and long.  Hmmmmm that was exactly what I needed. I rolled over and fell back to sleep.

Before even heading to the venue, I shot Drew a text.

“It's Y/N from wardrobe. I need a few measurements. Can you give me a few minutes of your time today?” I put my phone down, but immediately received a reply text.

“Yes. Where are you now?”

“Still at the hotel, but I can be at the venue in a half hour.”

“My day is completely booked up. The only time I have is now. Are you at the Regency?” He asked.

“Yes.”

“Let's do this now. What's your room number?” I balked at the idea, but I knew the talent usually had busy days... especially with Drew returning to WWE. I'm sure he had press to do. I sent Drew my room number and pulled out the book with the measurements.

Drew knocked in a few minutes. That was fast. I opened the door to see the new Drew. This was not the gorgeous Scottish prince from 2007. What stood in front of me was a giant hulk of a MAN..... a king...... His black t-shirt barely containing his muscles. His hair seemed darker, curlier, and pulled back at the nape of his neck, and his voice was much deeper than I remembered. “I'm Drew” he said as a warm smile crossed his lips. Oh good golly. Just those 2 words set my whole body on fire. This man was pure sex appeal, and the dimples on his cheeks didn't help. I'm just wound up from the dream last night, I thought. Stay professional. I pleaded with myself.

“I'm Y/N. Sorry to add something to your day.” I said inviting him in. “You got here so fast, I didn't even have time to get my tape measure out.” I chuckled.

“I was stayin' just down the hall.” He admitted. “Where do you want me?” He asked.

In my bed! I thought. That's it... I was busted.... I had to have turned 18 shades of red, but if I did, Drew was nice enough not to let on. “Stand right where you are,” I answered as I fumbled for a pen and the tape measure.

It was then that I realized with anyone else, and anywhere but my hotel room, I would have asked the talent to take their shirt off, but given my mood, I decided to work around Drew's clothes. I got right to work measuring. I jotted down measurements and notes as I went along. Then I decided to have Drew try on the pieces that had already been assembled. He did and grimaced when his arm wouldn't fit in his sleeve.

“Who measured you?” I asked knowing I wasn't going to like the answer.

“I... I don't know. Some lad with red hair.” He grinned at me.

Henry! I thought. Oh good golly. Henry was fantastic at sewing but often measured wrong. Crap! I'm going to have to re-do all the measurements, and Drew is in a hurry. “Ok. I'm going to re-measure you.” I saw Drew sigh in frustration. I laid a hand on his arm reassuringly, and immediately regretted it. It was inappropriate and only fueled my lust. “I promise to be faster and better than Henry.”

He placated me with a nod, but I could tell by his eyes that he was frustrated. I felt the need to reassure him again but realized showing was better than saying. I went right to work. Now if I could only get my stomach to stop churning with every time my skin made contact with his........ Let's get this done right and quickly! I told myself.

It was a mere 5 minutes later when I finished, and I earned a raised eyebrow and a warm smile when I told him. “That was much faster.” He admitted.

“I aim to please.” I joked. “I'll call you probably tomorrow to come try on the assembled jacket.”

“I'll be sure to swing by to see you when I get to the venue.” He said. “Thanks for getting this done so fast, and for letting me come here for it. I know it's not the most professional place.” That smile was slowly melting me.

“No problem. I'll see you tomorrow.” As he left, I breathed a sigh of relief. That was done, and I didn't make a blubbering fool of myself despite the urge that bubbled up inside me.

Once set up in the venue, I quickly went to work. Sandra and I agreed that my time was best spent working on Drew's coat, so only the most pressing interruptions came to me.... A tear in some trunks, a zipper on a shirt... but most of my time was spent working on the coat. I had all of the leather assembled. Now I was just putting on the metal spikes while I waited for Drew to visit wardrobe tomorrow. With any luck, I'd have this project done early, and I'd be able to avoid Drew and those intoxicating looks in the future.

Each spike, chain and grommet I added was one step closer to being done with this.... with him? I knew that wasn't what I wanted, but it was what I needed. I needed to steer clear of this giant made of sex appeal, so I could concentrate on my profession. Relationships weren't in my schedule.

“Do you have time for me?” a soft gravely voice came from behind me. I turned to find that Drew looming over me.

“I.... I wasn't expecting you until tomorrow.” I said. “I thought you were booked up for today.”

“The interview I did was shorter than expected.” Gah... how could this giant sound so soft and gentle? It was unnerving. If only he was rough and tough, I could dismiss him as a jerk, but instead, he practically whispered when he talked, and his head dipped slightly as if he was trying to hide how tall and big he was. He was more of a gentle teddy bear than a man who could force-ably take anything he wanted. As the thought ran through my head, so did my dream from last night. His giant hands, his soft hair, his hazel/gray eyes. I dug my fingernails into my palm to stop my daydream.

I untangled the coat from the sewing machine. “Are you ready to try it on?” I asked holding the jacket up to help him try it on.

Instead of going for the jacket, he stopped to pull off his shirt. I gasped; loud enough for him to hear.

“Sorry. A hiccup.” I tried to cover. He didn't indicate if he knew the truth.

He bowed down a bit to slip one arm in the coat I held up, and a smile crept over his face. As his second arm slipped in, and we both knew it fit perfectly.

“Well done Y/N” Drew said as his hands ran over the jacket as if smoothing down the lapels of a suit. “And your adding metal studs?” he asked.

“Actually, we are doing a combination of different metals.” I reached for the booklet with the sketches and opened it for him to see.

“Did you design this?” His eyebrows lifted as he looked through the book.

His eyes met mine..... the gray, green mixture and his soft words were making me melt. Stay professional Y/N. “No. You can thank Sandra for the design.” I said.

“Oh,” he looked disappointed. He walked over to the full length mirror we'd leaned against the wall and admired the coat. “I was wonderin' if you could design some new trunks for me.” He didn't turn to see me, but I saw that he was looking through the mirror at me.

I tried my best not to blush, but I failed. I quickly turned to my work station and grabbed the notepad to cover. “I can do that.”

“Do you think YOU can measure me this time? It would save time.” He smirked which only made him look even better.

I realized I was holding my breath. I chuckled, “Yes, I can do that too.”

Drew checked his phone quickly, “I've got some press to do now.” He tucked his phone back in his pocket and put his shirt back on. “Can we meet in catering before the show to go over designs?” I thought I saw a bit of a smile on his face, but brushed it off. Most of these male stars knew how to flirt to get what they wanted. I'm sure Drew was no different.

“Name the time.” I said.

We agreed on 5 pm.

“I'll buy you dinner.” He winked at me. Ok, now he was outright flirting with me. Don't fall for it. I told myself.

“Dinner is free, you knucklehead.” I joked back.

“Aye,” He turned to look directly into my eyes, “But that's not my fault.” That smirk again....

It's just innocent flirting. I'm sure he's like this with all the girls.

“True. Ok. 5 pm in catering.”

“See you then.” I expected him to leave, but he looked into my eyes, and the smirk was gone. He looked almost hurt. I masked the quizzical look that almost crossed my face. Whatever game this guy is playing, I've got a job to do. I will remain professional.

I was so engrossed in making his jacket that I was losing track of time again. When the alarm on my phone went off at 4:45, I was jolted back to reality. Shit! Prepare for more flirting. I've got to stop this.

As I made my way to catering, I passed Natalia who had an issue with her new costume. I told her to meet me in an hour and continued on my way. It was a distraction that pulled my mind from what was going to happen in a few minutes. If today was any indication, Drew would flirt with me to get what he wanted. It pissed me off as much as it melted me. Where did he get off playing with my emotions? I was fuming in anger by the time I walked into catering.

Drew spotted me before I spotted him. By the time my eyes reached him, he looked contrite. I went through the dinner line and picked out my dinner before joining him at the table.

“Are you upset?” Drew asked as I sat down.

Cover our emotions. Don't let him know. “Just busy.” I replied. “Nattie just threw another repair on me for tonight.” I explained.

Drew must have realized I wasn't in the mood to play his game tonight. “If you need to handle her repair, this can wait until tomorrow.” He offered as he nodded at my book.

“No!” I blurted out. What the fuck, Y/N? Why didn't I want to get away from him? I'm starting to fall for his flirting. Snap out of it. “No. I can do both.” I assured him calmer this time.

A small smile warmed his face, and I couldn't help but feel more relaxed. I tried to look at my notebook as I opened it, but my eyes stayed on his a moment too long. Those beautiful eyes. Stop it! I screamed to myself.

I took a couple bites of my dinner as I sketched out three pairs of trunks. “What colors were you thinking of for your trunks?” I asked.

“Black.” He said it without any hint of his normal flirtation, but even the sound of his serious voice jolted through me like white hot fire. Shit!

“Just black?” I asked, “because if so, I'm done.” I chuckled nervously.

He chuckled back. “No. No. I want you to add some Celtic crosses.” He reached to his back pocket to grab his phone and quickly opened a few pictures of Celtic crosses.

As we started looking through the crosses, I started to relax. When I relaxed, he did too. I was completely focused now on designing his new trunks. We decided on a couple of different styles. Gold outline with a black Celtic cross, Red cross with gold background, and a Gold cross with a red circle on a red background. Then we discussed the way the cross would be laid out on the trunks and then onto the materials I would use. All of it was simple to me, but he seemed impressed.

“Listen, I know you've got a lot on your plate right now. I don't need these in a hurry.” Drew assured me.

“Well, Nattie's repair and your coat should be done tonight, so I'll have some time. Barring any unforeseen circumstances, I should be able to have one pair done by tomorrow.” I assured him. “But I will need to measure you. Will you have time for that before the show?” I asked.

“If not, I'll come by during the show. I'm not on until later.”

And with that we were done. No matter how much I enjoyed his company, I still had work to do. “I'll catch you later then.” I said as I grabbed my tray and headed back to wardrobe.

I spent the next couple of hours doing repairs and working on Drew's coat. I was excited that I was getting closed to finishing.

“Are you ready for me?” I knew it was Drew. How a man his size could sneak up on me not once, but TWICE in the same day was a mystery.

“Actually, you've got perfect timing.” I turned around to see him bringing his coat with me. “I'm onto the very last details. Can you try this on for me again?” I asked and Drew smiled softly.

“Your wish is my command.” He flirted, and it worked. Every muscle in my groin twitched as he spoke and smiled at me.

Cover your emotions. I told myself. “Ok. Ok. Casanova.” I brushed off his flirtation. “I've got a job to do.” I said seriously, but I couldn't hide the tiny hint of a smile that played at the corners of my mouth. He looked so pleased to see it. “Try it on.” I told him.

He did, and we found that the coat was just a bit longer than he wanted. That was an easy fix.

“Let's get you measured.” I said professionally. “Are you wearing underwear?” I asked seriously.

He didn't answer right away, but lowered his head a bit and quirked an eyebrow up. “Excuse me?”

“Cut it out, Drew.” I said crossing my arms across my chest to show him I meant business. “I need to measure you, and I can't do it over your jeans. Surely, you've had to do this for other costume crews.”

A look of realization came over his face. “Oh, Yeah. Yeah. I'm wearing underwear.” Did he just blush?

He looked directly into my eyes as he reached to the button of his jeans, I couldn't help realizing just how perfectly they fit him. Dear golly! I wish all men wore their jeans like him. Stop it! I turned to get my tape measure and my notepad to avoid watching the extremely sexy man stripping.

Stay professional. Do your job. You've seen men in their underwear before. This is no different than any other fitting. Focus on your job.

When I turned back around, Drew was standing in just his t-shirt and his boxer briefs. The sight was enough to get me wet, but I focused on my work. I tried to pay attention to anything other than his body. This was quite possibly the most awkward I'd ever felt in my life, even though I'd measured plenty of men for trunks and pants.

It was just as I was measuring his inseam that my hand brushed against his balls and I dropped the measuring tape. FUCK! He pulled away from me slightly. There was no doubt that his penis hardened a bit at the touch. “I'm so sorry.” I apologized not even looking up at him and went back to my work.... trying not to think about the growing appendage in front of me.

It was then that he tentatively said, “Would now be a bad time to ask you out?”

I barely had time to even register the question when I heard “YES!” from across the room. It was Sandra, and she headed our way. “Highly inappropriate, and if you say anything else, I'll call HR.” She tapped my shoulder. “Take a break Y/N.”

I was relieved and confused. Did he just ask me out? Right after I brushed against his balls? I knew it was a terrible thing for him to do, but there was a part of me that wanted to say yes. I admit that this particular part was focused on his growing dick, but that doesn't make his question right. “Why don't you go take a walk?” She asked me. “Come back when you're ready.” I nodded in agreement, not sure what to say, and as I walked out, I heard Sandra start railing on Drew, “What the fuck were you thinking? This poor girl is just trying to do her job, and you come in here...” As the door shut, I couldn't hear her anymore.

Once I was in the hallway, I didn't know what to do. I stood there dumbfounded for a minute. Baily was the one who found me there.

“Hey girl, are you ok?” she asked.

It shook me out of my fog. “Yeah, Yeah... Sorry. I zoned out.” I said to her. I tried thinking on my feet, “I was just headed to the restroom.” I answered and headed there.

I entered a stall and latched the door behind me. I just stood there, trying to catch my breath. Did Drew McIntyre just ask me out? I admit there was a connection between us, but to ask me out THEN? RIGHT THEN? What the fuck was that? Why would he do that? What could he gain from asking me out then. Was he joking? Was he serious?

These questions and more swam through my head all night. I dreamed of a Scottish king who took what he wanted. I dreamed of him in a kilt with a broadsword swinging at invisible enemies. I dreamed of his breath on my neck, his hands in my hair, his body against mine. I dreamed of lustful looks and stolen kisses, of all encompassing passion. I dreamed of him making love to me.

I woke covered in sweat and out of breath. Again, I needed to cum. Fuck! I laid in bed, knowing what I wanted, what I needed. I closed my eyes as I slid my hand down and made myself cum to memories of my dreams. Good Grief! I hope I didn't run into Drew today. I needed to get him out of my head.

I arrived at the arena a few hours early. I was headed to wardrobe when I spotted Drew talking to Aleister Black in the hallway. He looked positively flustered when he spotted me. He put both his hands up as if surrendering and slowly walked up to me.

“I'm so sorry.” He hung his head. “I don't know what I was thinking.” He continued.

I wrapped my arms over my chest and huffed. “I know what I said was inappropriate. Well, the timing was. Can you forgive me?” he looked at me with big puppy dog eyes.

“Drew,” I started but I couldn't think of what to say. There was an awkward pause.

I could tell the silence was upsetting him. “Let's just...... Let's forget it.” I said. I didn't mean to, but my tone sounded angry.

He raised his head a bit in relief. “I......” He stopped, unsure how to continue.  “Can I just explain?”

The hanging of his head, the fidgeting as he talked, the fact that he obviously didn't know what to do with his hands.... in fact his normally controlled body language was replaced with uncertainty. He was vulnerable, and that struck me as pitiful.  “Yes.” I said after a deep breath.

He started to look around, “Can we go somewhere away from others?”

I motioned to the end of the hall. It wasn't private, but it was far enough away that nobody would hear us. I noticed Alistair watching us from where he stood in the hall, and I took comfort in knowing someone was there if this all went south.

Drew cleared his throat and fidgeted again, “I know what I said... well, when I said it was all wrong. The truth is, I was very uncomfortable. When you accidentally brushed against me, my body....” he searched for the right word. “Responded.” He looked down at me shyly. “I wasn't exactly in a position to hide it from you.” He outright blushed. “I...” He huffed out a breath. “From the minute I saw you, I was attracted to you. When you brushed against me, and my body.... responded, I just got all awkward, and I said the first thing that came to mind.” He looked down at the floor. “It was completely wrong of me, and I do offer you my sincerest apology.”

If strong, stoic Drew was attractive, vulnerable, sweet Drew was downright irresistible. “So, what are we going to do about this?” I asked.

Drew was quick to answer, “Sandra is going to handle the jacket and my trunks from now on.” He said, and I detected a hint of sadness in his voice. He looked down at the floor.

“Like hell she will!” I said, and he immediately looked up at me in surprise. “That coat is going to be my masterpiece!” A slight smile curved one side of his mouth as a look of hope started to dawn in his eyes. “I'll be damned if I'm going to let anyone else get credit for your coat. I meant what are we going to do about the fact that we are attracted to each other?”

He was dumbfounded. His eyes looked scared and hopeful. “Do you..... Umm.... Will you.... Do you want to go out with me?” he asked.

I kept my arms folded in front of me, “I'm interested in having a couple of more conversations with you.” I said brusquely, “If you think you can keep yourself from being an ass.” I let the corner of my mouth curve into a smirk.

It was then that he hit me with a full, panty dropping, smile. “I can try my best, lass, but you get me flustered.” He answered.

“Try your best?” I raised my eyebrows questioningly then broke into a laugh.

He raised a hand in a pledge, “I'll try my best.” He waited a second before asking, “Can I buy you dinner in catering tonight?”

“It's not buying dinner if the food is free,” I teased.

He laughed heartily and the low grumble of it vibrated through my core. “5 o'clock?” He dipped his head in a nod.

“Sounds great.” I agreed. There was a momentary awkwardness as we tried to figure out how to end this talk.

“I'll see you at 5, princess.” He said gently, and I swear everything in me melted at the pet name.

As soon as I walked into wardrobe, Sandra descended on me like a vulture. “Drew is going to give you an official apology tonight. I'll be sure to be right by you for it.” She assured me.

“He already did.” I smiled.

She looked upset, “He did? He was supposed to come in here to apologize in front of me.”

“He ran into me on the way here. It's all worked out, but you're sweet to care so much.” I smiled.

“You're my best seamstress, and I won't have the talent treating you like a piece of meat. You deserve to be treated right!” Said like a true mama bear.

“Sandra, it's ok,” I chuckled. “I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself.” I smoothed my hand down her arm to assure her. “The fact that you came to my aid yesterday means the world to me. Thank you.” I said.

“Ok, ok.” She surrendered. “Did he do a good apology?” She questioned as she looked through a box of zippers.

I couldn't hide my smile. “Very good.”

The tone of my voice got her attention, “What did he say?” She prodded.

“That he was sorry. That it was an awkward moment and he said the first thing he could think of.” I thought about telling her that I'd brushed against him and he'd gotten hard, but decided mama bear would be furious if she knew that. “I'm positive he learned his lesson.” I assured her.

“Good.” She huffed and walked away.

I didn't lose track of time today. In fact, I checked the clock every 10 or 15 minutes until dinner time.

Drew was already seated when I got there, and I was 5 minutes early. I went through the dinner line and sat down across from Drew.

“I've got good news,” I chirped out in a sing song fashion.

His raised eyebrow asked before his words. “Yes?”

“Your coat is done!” I said triumphantly.

He chuckled at my tone, “Is it now? Pretty proud of yourself, aren't ya?”

“Well, after our conversation yesterday, I made some changes to Sandra's design to better reflect you.”

Now both of his eyebrows raised up, “Did ya now?”

I raised my chin strongly, “I think you're going to love it.” I said confidently.

“Well, lets swing by wardrobe after dinner and see.” He teased. “I'm sure I'm going to love it,” he said more seriously.

We sat and ate and ignored the looks on other's faces as we dined. We talked about our childhoods and jobs that led us to the WWE, and before I knew it, dinner time was done and we headed to wardrobe.

As we walked in together, I noticed Sandra saw us. She took a protective mama bear stance, and turned the sewing form so she could keep her eyes on us as she worked.

I handed the leather coat to Drew, and he gratefully accepted. “Let's see what you've been up to.” He joked. He stood in front of the full length mirror and began to unfold the coat. He glimpsed it before even putting his jacket on. His fingers ran over the embroidery. I had placed a small silver Celtic knots on both lapels of the coat. “They're beautiful.” He said in awe. “You did this today?” He asked as he put the coat on.

As we looked at how the coat fit him, he ran his hands over the knots again. “I love it,” He smiled.

I let a hint of mischievousness cross my face, “Wait. There's more.” I walked over to my work station and dug through the projects I was working on. I came back with the first pair of trunks for Drew. “These are meant to go specifically with the coat.” I handed them to him.

He gently unfolded the trunks and a giant smile erupted on his face as he saw the Celtic crosses on the sides and the giant Celtic knot I'd embroidered on the back. He looked almost stunned, “You did this?” I smiled, and I nodded which made him smile more. “That was so sweet.”

“Try them on,” I pointed to the makeshift changing area. He happily obliged.

When he walked out, everyone in wardrobe stopped. The trunks, the coat, the giant hulk of a man.... There was a confidence about him that was lacking in his street clothes. This time I didn't cover my gasp.... neither did Henry. (I heard him from across the room. )

“Take your hair down,” I heard Sandra say as she handed him a water bottle. He let down his hair, opened the bottle and poured a bit over his hair. Not as much as he normally would if he was going in the ring, but enough to get the full effect. He strode over to the mirror confidently and a rough, gravely growl emerged from him when he saw his reflection. He stood taller. He walked like a warrior. His muscles bulged.

“It's perfect!” Henry chimed from across the room.

Sandra placed her hand on my shoulder as she looked at my work. “It is,” she agreed. “You outdid yourself, Y/N.” She patted me gently.

“It is.” Drew gruffed out. The compliment sounded odd coming from the Celtic Warrior who stood in front of me.

I beamed with pride as Sandra began inspecting my work and found it to be flawless. “But don't ever alter my designs without my permission again.” Her voice took on a more professional tone.

I giggled and agreed. Everyone got back to work, leaving me in front of the mirror with Drew. He seemed like a whole other man in his full gear, which, I guess, was the best compliment. He was giant, daunting and incredibly sexy.

In the mirror, his eyes shifted to me. “Thank you!” I blushed at his words. We stood there a moment longer, looking at each other. Suddenly, his arms shifted and he pulled the coat closed in front of him. Just before it closed, I looked down to his trunks and figured out why. That made me blush even more.

“Why don't you change back into your street clothes?” I offered, pretending I hadn't seen his erection.

“Oh no!” He smirked. “I'm wearing this tonight unless you have to work on them more.”

I wasn't prepared for that, but he did have a match soon, so it made sense. I shook my head no.  “I am going to go get ready then.” He said. “Are you going with us to Cincinnati tonight?” he asked.

“Yes.” I answered, getting excited at what he'd say next.

“Can we have breakfast tomorrow?” He tilted his head slightly to the side; causing him to look more like the sweet man I met yesterday than the Celtic Warrior he looked like in his gear.

“Mmmhmm” I nodded yes.

“I'll call you around 9 am then.” He said gently and grabbed my hand. He slowly brought my hand to his lips and brushed his lips across my knuckles gently. “Tonight's win is for you.” He said, and he walked out.

As I sat back down to my sewing machine, I noticed the impressed look on Henry's face and the curious look on Sandra's face.

#drew mcintyre #wwe #wwe smut #drew mcintyre x reader #wwe fic #fic

[whats-the-story-tc]

26th-28th of April, 2020

"The Ones with the Series of Unfortunate Events"

[LONG AS FUCK SORRY]

After what happened on Saturday, I could barely fall asleep at night. I had a splitting headache from all the crying and genuinely felt like shit. Morning came, and I immediately reached for my phone. Nothing from her. It still being quite early, I tried to go back to sleep, and spent a full hour tossing and turning, a head full of thoughts, until I couldn't take it anymore. I turned my phone on and checked the notification bar, only to see a very familiar name and face.

I submitted my essay to her already, way before it was due, so when she actually assigned it in Google Classroom, I just pressed 'Mark as done' and thought I was good to go. V has obviously seen it (two links here). And, even though I didn't submit jackshit this time, she still felt the need to send me a "Thank you :)". I was overjoyed. FINALLY. So, as I explained here already, I had an impulse thought and decided to respond. "And thank YOU for the "task". I had a lot of fun with it. (I mean, the [poet's name] one.) If you're ever curious about anything of this sort, don't keep it to yourself :)" Of course, I regretted it as soon as I sent it. And, of course, I knew I wouldn't get an answer.

I promptly took a full day of rest after that, like I was trying to recover from a bad break-up. I didn't expect to hear from her again the next day.

Monday morning. New notification. Same old love of my life. She assigned us a project we'd already spoken about last week — to reinterpret a monologue from the play I read, the one V really likes, in any shape or form. Painting, video, prose, or, to quote V: "tiktok (not that I know how that works, but it's your choice)". She also said that she wants to keep what we make, maybe even share them with our Geo/Art teacher. I got even mote excited than when she first announced this. I knew I wanted to draw something, to show her a side of me she'd never seen before. I'm starting it on Friday. Doing a bit of painting, too. Wish me luck.

At around 2 PM that same day, Pocketwatch Friend noticed V's reply to her essay and asked me how she should respond to her. Found it quite funny, not gonna lie, knowing my history with replies. And as my friends told me about the responses they got, I realised a fundamental difference. All of them were skimmed over going into detail. They noted them fine, but didn't take the time to explain why they were noteworthy. So basically, they lacked content. Meanwhile the only things she spent paragraphs pointing out about my essay were miniscule stylistic mistakes. This gave me a fair bit of reassurance about what I do. I did enough. I was enough.

Come Tuesday, I was a nervous wreck to say the least. I always am, when it comes to online classes, but especially so when I have class with V. I walked up-and-down in the room, listening to her talk, not daring to say a word. God, I wish I kept to that.

Before I get to the part where y'all laugh at my misery, a teensy bit of prelude. Here I mentioned that the first time I had spoken to V after class, the 11th of October, 2018, we spoke about Hamlet. In short, I was a bit oblivious, and didn't really know how to recognise the Oedipus complex I've seen associated with the play. We were covering the story of Oedipus anyway, so I trotted up to her after class to talk. I remember the afternoon Sun shining really bright that day, and V being very relaxed and fully in her element as she spoke, leaning against my desk (that I wasn't sitting at by then). I went home smiling, unable to get her out of my head after that. It should've been clear from that day.

Now, on to class. There were a lot of good bits, a lot of interesting bits... but I don't want to talk about those now.

Last ten minutes, V asks if there are any questions. "I might just have one." I said, and immediately regretted it, even though I could hear the smile in V's voice as she said "Off you go". Theatre/Literature buffs, I'm sure you'll know the line "Frailty, thy name is woman!" from, you guessed it, Hamlet. Now, in the poem we were talking about, there was a line with the exact same structure, only with different words in the place of frailty and woman. I tried to twist it and see if V made that same association, but luck didn't favour me that day. V had no last clue what I meant when I said the quote was familiar. I tried to explain it to the best of my abilities, though I didn't remember the exact Hamlet quote. Neither did V. "I don't really know Hamlet by heart." "Neither do I!" I tried to counter, but just made it more awkward. Bless her soul, V googled it there and then, but just by me saying it was said to Gertrude, it brought up another play with another Gertrude — coincidentally, the one V stroke up a conversation about with me on the very last day of actual school. Those being the results made V laugh, so at least that's a win from my part. I ended up looking it up myself, trying to remember the quote, and ended up answering my own damn question. "So it was the grammatical structure, then?" V asked, with that very same peace in her voice as last year, and I excitedly replied "Yes!". Conversation over. And even though she genuinely sounded interested, I hated myself for bringing up a totally unnecessary thing. Though I hope that I made V "pull [Hamlet] off the top shelf" after class, as she said she might, were it not for me finding the answer.

I was already feeling horrible. Then, V brought up the assignments mentioned earlier and sounded really excited about it, starting to list what she imagined us doing. "A rewrite of the scene in the play..." and as she was saying my name, I grinned and asked her "Was this an indirect reference?". I needed no further convincing that she, indeed, read what I texted her. But here comes the part I laugh at now, but right then it was horrible. She actually chuckled at my teasing question, and God I wish I remembered what she said. Then I said: "I was actually planning on something else, but..." because I found it an interesting idea, and I have been meaning to do that, too. And that's where it got awkward. V, the usually unfaltering and confident V, was startled. Proper startled that she might have accidentally changed my mind. She started saying "oh, no, I didn't mean it like that, I was just trying to predict things..." and that made me worried, so after the oh no, I immediately started rambling "no, no, of course, I know what you meant, I understand". So there we were, talking over each other, both of us a nervous mess that we may have said something wrong we didn't mean. Right now, I find it absolutely hilarious, because how on Earth did we manage that?? But there and then?

I started crying. Silently, of course, not to worry her even further. (I didn't want to turn my mic off because I was scared it would malfunction again.) But I was so tense, that all my gasoline pool of nerves needed was this little spark of awkward, and it caught flame. I stood there, tears streaming down my cheeks, blaming myself for speaking and thinking I should've just shut up.

Soon after, V told us not to stress about the assignment, because "it's just homework". Everybody's favourite Cynical Twat, who is even worse at social situations than I am, tried to express he was glad to hear that, but did so in a very confusing and sarcastic way that V didn't really understand. "It would be pretty shitty of me" to make us stress, she said. So I dried my tears and jumped in, because she deserved to hear the compliment. "I don't mean to speak for [Cynical Twat], but I think he meant that we're all glad you said that. Not many people do it like that." I told her something along the lines of that. "Oh, okay." she said, disbelief thick in her voice. Hey, V. We bloody love you. It's time you start believing it.

Class ended soon after, and I spent about twenty minutes sobbing and cursing myself. The message from Pocketwatch Friend saying "I can't believe [V] replies to everything" as they were talking about her essay, only made it worse.

That night, I had a conversation with one of my underclassmen I talk to every once in a blue moon. We were discussing school and teachers, and I intentionally didn't bring up V. I waited for her to. Though, okay, I did provoke it a teensy bit, but just slightly. So, we talk about her, and through the things the girl says, I find out that... heh, of course, I'm not the only one she strikes up convos with. Turns out, after a joke, V even winked at her! (Okay, she did that to me once, too, when I stood up for her in class, but that's not the point.) After that, I was carrying the convo on just fine, but inwards, I was spiralling into a great big void of 'You ain't special to her, bitch, the fuck were you thinking'. The girl ended the conversation with "the woman's weird (...) but that's how we love her". Right. Yeah.

Now, two days later at current, I'm back in the room where all the crying went down. Bit surreal, thinking back. I'm sure I won't forget this for quite a while. Will my unlucky strike stop anytime soon? I don't know. We'll see. But I don't think anything could surprise me anymore.

You may take that as a challenge, V.

~ S ♡

[Every story I share here, no matter how specific I get with my wording, depicts actual events from my own life.]