#we also plan on unburying him

[imkazz]

the dnd party stuck in a fight in a bathhouse: bard: i beat the warlock to death with some weighted dice and a longsword dm: that... somehow worked. what now?? paladin: i start burying him. dm: wtf youre inside a bathhouse and literally surrounded by guys who want to kill you how does that work paladin: i rip out the floorboards and bury him druid: *watching in horror* paladin: do we have some flowers in here?? dm: what no youre in a bathhouse??? and as ive already said YOU ARE GOING TO DIE IF YOU DONT DO SOMETHING bard: well isnt there some sort of decorative object dm: i mean theres towels and shampoo bottles you arent going to live- papadin: i use a shampoo bottle to mark the warlocks grave

[captainjacklyn]

@Silverbard22 Special Birthday Occasion !

A/N : Happy birthday my friend ! Congratulations on being today years old, as my (late late late late LATE! really sorry about that) gift for you I'll be writing this headcanon with every character from Mondstadt to Sumeru celebrating your birthday ! And fun fact, you were born on the same day as my old cat ! (his name was 'little steps' and he passed away four years ago because he was old but now I have two new troublemakers to destroy my sleep)

Warning(s) : some bombs from klee, a lot of cake but idk if that's even some kind of warning, mostly fluff, it's kind of Sagau if you squint a little.

MONDSTADT

The moment Jean was informed she got a multitude of knights just getting the entire city ready for a huge celebration, at this point, it's a national holiday. She patrols around to check if everything is in it's rightful place, if anyone dares to sabotage or disrupt such an occasion they will get beheaded. Amber and Eula follow after their senior, wishing you the best when they see you, since the beautiful Lawrence maiden understands how important this day is for you she'll perform a wonderful dance for you.

The church also prepared a wonderful original song for you, and it was all thanks to Barbara and Venti (who was also the one that announced your date of birth) even if it doesn't match their usual tunes they will gladly change their genre just for you to enjoy their singing. It's kind of hard to imagine priests singing black metal but they'll do their best in doing it for you.

Diluc pretended not to care but the Dawn Winery had also been cleaned and decorated to the brim. Everything on the menu is just foods you enjoy, all that you dislike is BANNED from this place, they take your approval seriously and I mean it. When you come in, he has everything ready and perhaps even a huge gift. Though much to his dismay, Kaeya will tease him for it (not like he didn't plan grandiose things just to see your smile). Speaking of teasing, he starts to poke a multitude of pickup lines at you.

There is music, there is presents and decoration..what else are we missing? Oh wait who's the clown for this party-

I'm kidding I'm kidding Lisa is the magician, I know that her stans are out there to get me rn. Besides, the lady has a friendly, albeit a little explosive, assistant named Klee...And Albedo because we need a sane being around these two chaos inducing people. And don't think I forgot about the gifts- those are everywhere, they offer you presents all the time but they've out done themselves just for your special day.

All thanks to Sucrose who was more than overjoyed to be the one to get the honor of creating your main bestowal. Let's not forget Benny's Adventure team who crashed in halfway to celebrate alongside you. Bennett, Razor and Fischl ran like tornadoes to offer their own blessings, Rosaria pretended that she wasn't looking forward to give her own birthday wishes. But we can all see how happy your smile makes her the moment you thank her for coming.

LIYUE

Oh you are so spoiled for this one. Ningguang quite literally built a new jade chamber just for your birthday celebration and Ganyu worked faster than the speed of light just to get to spend some quality time with you, Keqing is no different with so much dedication nothing is stopping her now (her pen broke as she practically printed down files of tasks). No one has seen them more desperate than scaramouche wanting to become a god BUT that's just because she wants to spend as much time with you during these special hours, it's not everyday that your favorite person turns [age] years old !

Beidou doesn't seem like the type to throw a fuss during these occasions. And she isn't, you're absolutely correct, however she will bring you to any place around the ocean to go sight seeing and have her crew throw a party all evening. In addition to this wonderful proposal we got Hu Tao willing to unbury sixty dead people COUGH COUGH I MEANT INVITE I SWEAR GUYS DON'T ARREST ME-

Zhongli was also at the funeral parlor when his boss made preparations for your visit. He wanted to offer you a gift but with what money? so Childe had to take care of the presents instead. (Though he will go through the effort of offering you a dried glaze lily, accompanied with the marvelous yet oh so tragic meaning behind it, have fun falling asleep) Poof goes the northland bank money to the mountains of donations, his wallet is crying so many tears to the point where you'll need to name an entirely new river.

I swear if the river's name goes something like : 'spring valley view nice face' I say fuck that and call it 'broke stream' then we can get along. I just hope Xiao actually participates in your ceremony physically rather than alternatively placing a gift at your window and disappearing right after. It becomes a game for a while, just spend the whole day trying to find him to say thank you. He finds your tenacity so impressive but so confusing, why are you ripping both time and space HE'S HERE GOOD HEAVENS-

This goes for Shenhe too, be nice to her okay? it may not seem like it, but the young woman is trying very hard to please you, although it is evident that you truly enjoy her presence. Chongyun tagged along with his aunty, whilst Cloud Retainer would've been there, her bad habit of spilling the embarrassing memories of her beloved students made the graceful lady refuse the bird's company.

Have you ever seen Xiangling cook the worth of three buffets ? Well, now you have, she felt so ashamed for forgetting what you liked ! So she panicked and made every food known to their world, even those that didn't necessarily originate from Liyue.. I salute you, that much nutrition will probably be the end of it all. Xingqiu is no more after helping his good companion, winded and absolutely exhausted, I mean who cooks 149 recipes in FIVE HOURS?!

Honestly, I really jealous about the fact that YaoYao made you a custom plushy that resembled a mini you, she even added a small yellow bunny attached on the side as well as your birthday day sewed on it. Qiqi was the one with the responsibility to deliver it for her friend, of course Baizhu needed to remind her of doing so too. Speaking of that shady doctor, he hangs around you to make sure you stay healthy. Tho his coughing isn't really helping the process, he's trying to be of use. Let's not forget that Yelan most likely stole another fatui jacket just because she kinda...Forgot? I mean, she got the gift and she stylized it just to match your style...If only she knew it was Childe's present on its way to you.

INAZUMA

Boob sword, boob sword, boob sword- If that's what you want she'll whip out that weapon faster than lightning. get it? I'm such a loser. Ei turned your birthday into the new year festival, fireworks bigger than ever were organized thanks to Yoimiya. Look closely and you'll notice that the sparkling firecrackers spell out your name and create visuals of your favorite animal/food!

Itto is gonna bring you around town with his gang, if you want he can even carry you on his shoulders during the entire time he's showing you off with Shinobu by his side, his (unpaid) nanny who is continuously begging him to be careful. She smiles under her mask when she sees you laugh at their antics, but please don't encourage them too much, keeping them out of trouble is already hard enough.

Subsequently, you met up with Gorou and Kokomi who offered their heartfelt wishes, including an all out party with the army. Everyone was dancing, drinking and losing all of their remaining braincells..Thank goodness our gorgeous mermaid stopped you from consuming anything too strong..would've been as bad as taco bell- RING RING ! I have a delivery for the Birthday Star! Soft paws and double tails, it's none other than the speedy Nekomata, Kirara! Right on time as always for bringing a packet to the rightful owner.

The nice surprise ended up being a very cute gift box of many different delicacies along with...a birthday card from Yae Miko? Well, ain't that a new one. Seems like she gives you her sweet wishes and an opportunity to write a book with her. Gracious.

Smoke weed with the samurai Jk- Kazuha sends you a gush of wind with a bunch of leaves that end up spelling 'happy birthday' when they fall to the floor.

can he do that? It'd be fun if he could do that. He can do that.

Then you have the...Rich ones, I'll say it right off the bat, Ayaka and Ayato have prepared exactly everything from schedule to how many confetti will be thrown in your direction every minute of the day. Thomas is right behind them and he's cleaning up after said confetti, Poor guy. Someone help him...Yeah, definitely...Someone should.

... :)

Oh my archons is that? No way, La Signora's ashes flying all the way from Snezhnaya Kujou Sara what do we have here? A tiny figure of the raiden shogun, as a birthday gift? How adorable. Surely it'll be more eternal than a certain crimson witch HAHAHA- please don't kill me. This came from Sara's precious collectible collection so don't drop it. Ever.

SUMERU

Oh Nahida, she did say that your celebration shall be at least as grand as the Subzeruz Festival. So, don't be shy, let her pull you through and help you enjoy the sights! You wouldn't want to miss Nilou's pretty performance would you? Tighnari, Collei and most of the other forest rangers came along too! Now there's a table's worth of present for you, with very pretty mushrooms, some crafted trinkets, a flower bouquet that sprayed water in your face- CYNO! "What did one plate say to the other plate on their birthday?" "Cyno please-" "Lunch is on me."

"..."

"..."

"Good job, buddy. Good job."

If anyone makes me right down a joke like that again, I will kill myself. Luckily for you, Sethos swoops in to save you, maybe? All I know if that he's up for a new hairdo desert dweller style! But give him a second to catch his breath. He did drag hat guy all this way for a reason, surely it isn't because mister Wanderer thinks himself above wishing you a small happy birthday? No, he ain't that's why he's here, darling. Albeit a little against his will. His little auntie would've pushed him towards you anyways, he's a little shy, give him some time. *Cue the boss music.*

When Kaveh and Al Haitham finally arrive, they were willing to put their arguments to a pause and give you a well deserved happy birthday wish, including a long rant about how Al Haitham doesn't know shit about aesthetics and how Kaveh keeps losing his mother fucking keys- EHO WAIT A MINUTE! This isn't about you, *spray bottle* this is about [Name] so you better treat the birthday majesty, treat them well!

Oh! Dehya just arrived! Your very own bodyguard for the trip! She grants you protection as you make your way to Aaru village where Candace awaits. Birthday cake on a plate, and candles ready to place. You spend most of your time having fun with the people. And when the time for you to leave comes, Dehya thanks you as she brings you right back to Sumeru city. Where you encounter Dori at the entrance and she- Uh? Free gift? No there must be a catch, Dori doesn't give gifts! Ah right she wants to grant you a wish, which is technically a gift for as long as it isn't a lifetime of Mora...Cause that wouldn't work, no, no. Dori isn't a doner. "Happy birthday, [Name]-" "Could I have the Palace of Alcazarzaray?"

"...The what now?"

Well, guess that's everybody- Wait a damn minute where is Layla? Surely she isn't sleeping through your celebrations, the music is far too loud! Oh, never mind, there she is. Somehow awake and...She's with a gift, you now have your very own pocket astrolabe, I have no fucking clue how this thing works but you'll figure it out. I'm sure. And if not, well Miss faruzan is here to help, she'll also offer her own small toy for you. It's an assembly of a number of miniature puzzle mechanisms — you can find a button and lever here, as well as a roller to the side. I still have no clue on what and how, but it's the intention that counts.

Not me using her voice line to explain shit.

FLOWER CONFETTI ATTAAAACK-

FONTAINE

I do believe it was supposed to rain today, but monsieur Neuvillette did say that he would do something about it. Strange. Who could've thought he actually would- Wait no why is it starting, why do I feel sad, WHO DID THIS?!

It's okay now, Furina arrived just in time to distract him from the sadness. And! To remind him that a special someone was celebrating their special day today! Here's your ticket to 'Happy Day'! Don't make me spoil the surprise, there's a reason why it's called a surprise, don't you ask me what'll happen, don't you dare do it, don't-

She'll make sure you show up though since her dutiful Clorinde is never far away from you or Furina herself. She'll pop out of the blue, remind you of the time and disappear again, not before leaving a small birthday card at your feet. There is a letter along with...Mhm? Is that- a coupon for Furina's favorite bakery?!

You get to buy your own birthday cake! That sounds so sad but so good at the same time. And surprise, surprise! There's a surprise! From Sigewinne, Navia, Chiori, Chevreuse, Freminet, Emilie and Charlotte too! Even the whole of spina de rosula came along to celebrate before your attendance to 'Happy Day'! You receive a gorgeous outfit from Chiori, she insists that it was just an excuse to better your wardrobe but we all know she's looked forward to sewing something up for you, for a long time. Chevreuse's gift is a pile of the best selling Fontaine books, many of which are her personal favorite, but perhaps you'll take a liking to them too!

Charlotte got everyone to fit into the group picture, and with a snap! Collects the memory. She also gifts you your very own Kamera! Now even you can match her as a frenzied journalist! Just make sure you show her your future pictures, she'd love to collaborate on her next journal page! ft. [Name]'s photography.

Freminet was a little shy at first, but after a little encouragement from his siblings to face you without his helmet, you just had to gush over the Pers he gave you. He's more than glad you like it, though the way you seem so happy gets him a little embarrassed- And the helmet goes back on! Uh...

There's something tapping your leg, wait! The Melusines are all here! And they have lots of nice stickers! One here, and there, and everywhere! Sigewinne wanted you to spend time with as many friends as possible, though she regrets to say that Wriothesley couldn't come along, but he took the time to gift you an assortment of luxurious tea as well as a...Pair of...Boxing gloves? Oh well, better get to some sporty activities then. Fortunately for you, Emilie just created a new perfume made of your favorite scents that gets rid of any foul odor, and it's a limited edition [Name]-reserved product too!

Cue Lyney and his little magic trick, watch as he gives you a feather, observe how it pops and turns out to be a party popper. He grabs one of the floating paper streamers, drops it in the hat, imagine your gift, reach down and- Tada! Your very own mini Lyney the cat! And- What is this? His assistant, Lynette, takes the lead! She hands you a blank card, on it, write your wish before she places it in her own hat, gesturing you to reach within and- Tada! You now have a mini kitty Lynette! Wooo! Keep smiling, they don't have to know you imagined as well as wrote a thousand mora.

❤️🧡💛Happy Birthday💚🩵💙

[blatterpussbunnyfromhell]

Did Silver kill Flint?

I keep seeing cold ass takes in the Black Sails side of tumblr that make my blood boil.

Look, I got into Black Sails in 2017, three weeks after the finale aired. Back then, there seemed to be an understanding that the "Silver killed Flint" interpretation was just a fringe theory from straight people made uncomfortable by the queer lead getting a happy ending. Personally, it was my first encounter with the phrase "unbury your gays" (having learnt "bury your gays" a year earlier with The 100). It seemed to be generally accepted that Flint lived, and that this was the whole point.

Now, it would appear that a shift has happened in the fandom, where the idea of Silver killing Flint is no longer treated as a theory by straight weirdos but as a canon, onscreen event, and these posts come from queer fans. It seems to come from younger fans who were about 12 or 13 in 2017. It's so mindboggling to me.

The arguments for this Silver-Killed-Flint thing is usually the same two: birds flying away and Silver's men turning around in the forest, as in reaction to a noise, which is interpreted as a gunshot.

Like, I'm just elaborating on a rant I sent to my friends earlier today here but, if Silver killed Flint, then :

Why would we be shown an entire sequence with one of Silver's henchmen looking for Thomas where he is?

If Thomas and Flint are dead, why aren't we shown their deaths? It's an actual rule in cinema that a character whose death isn't shown on screen isn't dead, a rule that the show does follow (we see Billy's funeral but not his corpse). Besides, Black Sails doesn't shy away from showing death on screen, even for main characters. Then, why not show how Thomas died instead of telling us? Why not show us Silver shooting Flint? The writers trust their viewers to understand the pattern, and understand that the reason we do not see their deaths is because they aren't dead.

Why would Silver bring up Thomas to Flint if he'd planned on killing him? Or if, as I've also seen it said, it was just a lie he made on the spot for Madi ?

And talking about Madi, I've seen A LOT of people saying she would never forgive Silver. And to that I genuinely have to ask, have you seen their last appearence in the show? I dont mean their argument in the cabin, I mean the scene where Silver sits on top of a hill and turns around to find Madi waiting for him on the path. I mean the scene where he walks towards her and she waits for him. So, my question here, if she wasn't gonna forgive Silver, why is she waiting for him on that hill? Nevermind the fact that Treasure Island's Long John Silver is in a relationship with a Black woman (I've seen posts saying that could be Max, and really wtf??), what is the point of showing us this scene if she's not gonna forgive him? Why not stop their arc at the cabin where she sends him away?

At the time when Black Sails' finale aired, Supernatural was still queerbaiting its audience, and Sherlock ended in a fucking shitshow. People were throwing fits over Bill Potts, Doctor Who's first ever onscreen lesbian companion because she was a lesbian with a masculine name. A year before that, The 100, a very popular tv show at the time, had just killed it's only lesbian character and faced so much uproar and backlash for it. (That was my entry into the LGBT+ community, by the way : the first character to make me think I might actually like women getting killed on screen two scenes after having had sex with the female lead). Sense8's two-hour long finale and Love, Simon wouldn't air for another year.

So yeah, if you weren't into queer media back in 2017 (and omg I sound like such an old twat), I don't think you can understand just how important that ending, with Flint being reunited with the love of his life after so much pain and loss, was.

If your interpretation of Black Sails is that the events of Treasure Island happened the way the book tells you, then I'm sorry to tell you this but you completely missed the point of the show.

[pastellig]

Arslan Senki 127

This chapter opens with the titular Legend of the Snake King. I was struck by the many parallels between Arslan and Kaykhusraw illuminated by this tale:

Kaykhusraw’s mission is to overturn Zahhak, an evil that terrorizes his people; Arslan’s mission is to dismantle slavery, an evil that terrorizes his people. They both move toward their goal with small numbers of supporters.

Kaykhusraw first allies himself with Zahhak’s cook — like Arslan, he sees the value of individuals outside of the nobility and military.

Early in his mission, Kaykhusraw faces the reality that he cannot save everyone and settles for saving one person from every pair to be slaughtered for Shoulder Snakes™️. Arslan routinely balks at “settling,” and with the assistance of his allies can generally — but not always — avoid it.

Kaykhusraw’s small army is comprised of 365 “stout youth” who were saved by his partnership with the cook. Arslan quite similarly collects allies by offering grace and mercy.

These points emphasize the most important parallel: Kaykhusraw was the “Hero King” who gained his throne by overturning an unfair and oppressive power — not through the usual succession. Arslan is on the path to do the same. Despite not sharing blood with Kaykhusraw, his mission makes him the true successor to the Hero King.

Alfarid was great in this chapter. I absolutely love who she’s become in Arakawa’s hands. Giggly and love struck? Yes. A skilled leader and warrior who prioritizes practical, immediate needs? Also yes. We see that after Zahhak’s retreat in 127 part 2:

The Zot clan have enormous respect for all dead, not just their own — remember that they will not rob the bodies of the dead, nor the sick and dying. To leave a comrade unburied weighs heavily on them all but imagine how difficult it is for the leader of the Zot to leave members of her clan, her family, unburied and without their final rites.

In many ways, this call is one only Alfarid has the authority to make, and she does so in a frank (but not disrespectful) way. As Arslan has grown in his skills and confidence, his need for advice has diminished. We’ve seen Narsus refuse to make recommendations, leaving the choice to Arslan. Alfarid is effectively Shāh of the Zot, a clan that does not recognize Parsian authority. In this moment she speaks to Arslan as his equal, and thus gives the group the time they need to create as much distance as possible between them and their slithery opponent with regenerative powers and acidic blood.

Alfarid also gives Etoile a fresh horse from one of the fallen Zot members. It’s another sign of Alfarid’s authority and also a lovely indicator that Alfarid sees her as a core part of the group.

They all survived this time… I wonder what the outcome of the final battle against Zahhak will be.

In the novels, the final battle against Zahhak takes place after Arslan’s ascension to the throne. I’ve wondered how Arakawa planned to either condense the time between these events or unify them (and I leaned towards unification, because it’s way more dramatic). The Shoulder Snakes™️ slithering towards Ecbatana with Kaykhusraw’s disintegrating body between them hints at one option — and it involves a new host.

I think Hilmes is about to find out how Zahhak’s devotees plan to put him on the throne.

[bobbinbugs]

Quirrel was not suicidal

As a 3-year hollow knight fan, I see "Stag Beetles and Broken Legs" get recommended a lot. A lot a lot. Considered by many to be the definitive Hollow Knight fanfiction, it generates fanart and gushing recommendations every time it's mentioned.

But there's one glaring issue of interpretation I've gathered: It frames Quirrel at the Blue Lake as suicidal.

And I don't think that's correct at all.

Once you get down to it, everything in Hallownest is about death and avoiding it. The Pale King's eternal kingdom, the Soulmaster's shaping of soul, the Radiance's aimless reanimated vengeance... in clinging to life, they strip themselves of dignity, and cause unfathomable suffering for naught. Characters who think they will never die, like Tiso, meet their unceremonious end, unburied and unmourned. "All things must accept an end," in the words of Vespa's ghost.

A minor character reiterating one of the central themes of the game: hold that thought.

Few characters have immortality aside from gods. Even with gods, immortality is highly conditional: but that's a different essay. In otherwise "mortal" characters who lasted too long, they seem ghostlike themselves: the pale mourner evokes the classic white lady archetype, and dissipates into thin air once her business is finished. The seer appears to have a conditional immortality as well: once the maximum essence is collected, she, too, dissipates, having finally assured a new Wielder has come.

Quirrel seems to operate on this conditional immortality as well. Considering he left long enough ago for the plan to be put into action, the fail of it, and for the fallen kingdom of Hallownest to become "ancient". Like the Mourner and Seer, he probably should have reached the end of his natural lifespan long, long ago: and, as we see Monomon's mask protect him from killing blows in the prequel comic, it's fairly logical to conclude it's also extending his lifespan. No point in creating a back-up plan if the back-up isn't protected, right?

And what happens if you remove the lifesource?

Well... let's put it this way. "I begin to feel my age" takes on more weight than a quip about how much time has passed, or the burden of memory. Without Monomon's protection, his statement metamorphoses into an admission: Quirrel is starting to feel, body and mind, that his artificially-extended lifespan is catching up with him.

So that's the first half: accepting death. The second half is fulfilling your purpose for living: Let's talk about the Nailsmith.

The Nailsmith is a character who lives to forge nails. That's his art and purpose: to forge a Pure Nail. Once his purpose is completed, he loses his will to live: after all, it's completed. The way the ghosts pass on, and how Ghost too disappears when their purpose (defeat the radiance) is completed, the Nailsmith asks the player to kill him. Even his thoughts revolve around his worthlessness. His dream nail dialogue reads "My life's work achieved… What more is left…?" To the Nailsmith - and the oligarchs of the game - completing your purpose means you have outlived your usefulness. But there is a key difference between the Nailsmith's final* thoughts and Quirrel's final thoughts. For comparison:

"All tragedy erased. I see only wonders..."

This is not the dialogue of a suicidal person. Quirrel is not self loathing. He doesn't feel worthless. He's grateful for the long life he's lived, and the blessing that he gets to experience it twice over. And this is his dream nail dialogue: it's objective truth he's not putting on a brave face but harboring darker thoughts. Genuinely, I would not call these the thoughts of someone who wants to die: this is the thought process of someone who wants to live. You may extrapolate or choose to ignore, but I don't think it's founded to interpret Quirrel as suicidal.

And that establishes difference between the Nailsmith and Quirrel: Quirrel doesn't seem burdened by his lack of purpose. In fact, I don't even think he considered Monomon his purpose to begin with. We know from the Nailsmith that fulfilling your purpose means you've outlived your usefulness; you die, or you find a new purpose. But the Nailsmith's purpose was smithing nails, and he devoted himself to it. Quirrel is called back to Hallownest, but spends 90% of his time in it just... fucking about, to put it crassly. He does want to solve the mystery of his being called, but he takes his time. He doesn't consider his purpose is to serve Monomon; he's not overtaken by a passion or skill; Quirrel is a traveler. He's just after the wonders.

At the end, he does exactly that. He lived a long, full life for himself and no other, seeking out wonders and taking his time. He finished what he was called to do, but it's telling even his final goal - seeing the Blue Lake - is a goal for himself, and not something he was told to do. He spent most of that long life not knowing he had a purpose someone else set, and doing what he wanted.

(quirrel voice i was put on this earth to accomplish 1 thing but i forgot what it was so thankfully i can do whatever i want)

Despite his final thoughts being of someone who loves living, Quirrel is... almost absolutely dead. The file is called quirrel_death_nail.png. One of his first lines in the game is advising you to loot weapons from corpses, because the dead "shouldn't be burdened with such things," and the last sign of him is his abandoned nail. Furthermore, he abandons his nail at the time Hallownest is most dangerous, with the Radiance so close to being free. Self defense is more important than ever, and a character as wise as Mr. Either-you're-alert-or-you're-dead wouldn't abandon his nail at such a crucial moment! Overall, Hollow Knight is a game that keeps in the classic tragic opera tradition of killing off as much of its cast as possible before the final curtain, and Quirrel is no exception. You can argue that quirrel_death_nail.png is the death of "Quirrel the wanderer," but I'm not going to lie, the signs aren't in looking good.

But I don't think he drowned. Just for fun, let's bring a common fan interpretation into the fray: Quirrel is commonly interpreted as a pillbug. (So do I - it's just too perfect.) Neatly, pillbugs are actually crustaceans, and have gills! Given the general aquatic theme of fog canyon and his final stop at blue lake, the effect is less "giving up" and more "return to homeland/true nature," which is what Quirrel's arc is all about. I wouldn't worry about him drowning.

But if he's dead, and his last stop was at Blue Lake, but he didn't drown, what did happen to him?

Remember the Seer and Pale Mourner, and their conditional immortality? Keeping in line with the other ghosts-that-haven't-died in the resting grounds, I like to think Quirrel, upon completing his task, likewise fades into light. The location, lack of clarity between immortal, alive, or dead, and completion of unfinished business all line up for Quirrel to go the same way. This idea is a bit more of a stretch than all the others, but I believe it suits him. It's fair. It's graceful. It's direct contrast to an unburied corpse or an unmarked grave, like all the Fools at Kingdom's Edge.

So, In conclusion: Quirrel didn't drown himself. He doesn't think he's worthless or that he doesn't want to live. He saw his time is up - and perhaps had been up for a while - and does not scrabble or cling, but bows out with grace. In turn, the wandering scholar earns the rarest jewel in all of Hallownest: a dignified passing.

Rest in peace, Quirrel. You've earned it.

[emeraldoo]

HEY! HEY!! LOOK AT ME!!

LE MEH!!!

hi, my name is bastion!! i have lots of other names im ok with tho, like bb, b, 8, shiver, weird, etc! im not ok with the nickname EM or EMERALD!

i am a zombie, autism creature, maned wolf kin and fict kin Shiver from spl3 <3 i am also NOT a minor!!!!!! 19 yrs :•)) im also a rogue of mind!! (homestuck hoe.)

i am a trans male! i use he/xe/it prns! currently questioning my romantic attraction (pretty sure im bi-gay), but i am asexual!

i am the host in the zipties system, a did system!! some of the head mates have their own blogs, which ill tag :•)

i am audhd, gad, ocd, and a general cluster b pd haver!! i also have some delusions from ~an unkown disorder~ so! working thru some stuff still!

MY INTERESTS!!!!!!!

SPLATOON AUGHHHHH most of my blog is splatoon....

i freaking LOVE nnsg :•3333 the anime of ALL TIME!!

SCIENCE!!!!!!! i plan on majoring in microbiology and synthetic biology but i luv ALL science!!

MUSIC/BAND!! i play euphonium and play in marching band and concert ensembles <3

i luvvv itsv and atsv and all of the spiderverse stuf!!!!!! my fave spider in spider man india btw.!

GUILD WARS 2 AIUGHHJJJHHH THE BEST EVER ACTUWLLY. PLAY IT PLAY IT RNNNN

ALTERS!!

not all of our alters choose to make profiles, and we arent going to force them to make them. if you need to know them, just send a DM or ask

* = written by alter

BASTION (☘️): DAS ME BITCH! im the host and core of the system >:•D i am the main guy in this blog soooo ya. (he/him, xe/xem, it/its)

EM/@riddlekid (🧪): the rat. horrible terrible (/hj... i guess..!) obsessed with horrible ppl sooo. erm yeah. he is also a prosecutor.!! also second most freq fronter :•P (it/its, he/him)

JON/@just-dr (🎃): jon!! he is a protector and a fictive of jonathan crane.. he is nice :•)) he doesnt associate much with his source tho so shrugsies (he/him, they/them)

MILES (👤): i actually dont know much abt them... they do their job rlly good tho! protector n stuff.. cool! (they/them)

CORNELIUS (🩸): um... so it just split and formed prtty recently (as of 12/8/23) and i also. don't know much abt it! other than it's a fictive of cornelius stirk from batman unburied.. and a prosecutor! (it/its)

JADE (🌐): cutey patootie wolf thing! fictive of jade from homestuck andddd yeah!! cool (she/they)

KARKAT/@karkat-cornbread (🔥): fictive of karkat homestuck guy. gets very angry very fast. idk role but yeah. the amgry one ig (he/they)

* DAVE/@karkat-cornbread (🕶️): yea. is this bitch predictable or what lmfao (he/any)

* HAL/9K/@timothy-timeaus (🛑): Beep boop. Coolest splinter of Dirk. I'm also cool with the name Odyssey or 9k. (They/Them)

* EQUIUS/@runningfromred (🐎): Yes hello I am Equius I am more active on the cohost but might still use this platform.

* TIM/ @timothy-timaeus (🔗): I'm my own subsystem of splinters. I'm just a ye ol Dirk splinter.

* CALUM/@timothy-timaeus (🧢): bro strider splinter and a real goof. heeheeee

* JAKE (🦎): Your caretaker and funny guy! im from meat timeline and have alot of pseudos, sorry if im hesitant to interact with sourcemates :B

MY TAGGING SYSTEM!! (wip 8[)

#emeraldo slay posting: all of my posts! that i leave words on are tagged with 8)

DNI :•(

its not rlly. much? the only stuff i rlly care abt is jerks.. if ur a jerkkk (terf, racist, zionist, ableist, antikin, sysmed, transmed, antikink, whatever girl u git the gist....)

i don't have especially strong opinions on most discourse... slurcourse, syscourse, flagcourse, shipcourse... its kinda silly.! so um. whatever.

* (Hal writing.) Our take on pro/antiship is "It doesn't fucking matter". We aren't proship, we aren't antiship, we are just kind of shipping whatever the fuck we want. If you think it's problematic, we most likely won't care. Unless there's a genuine reason to be concerned, don't bother.

exclusionists!!!! i don't like you!!!!!!!!!!!! aphones, panphobes, biphobes, mspec gay/lesbian haters, antixenogender, anti neoprns, whatever! i do not like you at all >:•{

hp fans... you know why :•) please find a better media ..

BYE BYE!!

[wildlife4life]

WIP Wednesday

Tagged by the always wonderful @prince-buck-diaz before it was even Wednesday for me.

You all know what time it is...NFL Buck! Honest to god I'm not really that close to being done. I keep adding to my notes on what I want to include and now I'm think of doing a paragraph or two for each game day/week, except for opening day because boy do I have plans for that (hint: Madney!) There is so much I want to do for this fic. So thank you all for the continued support and interest. I hope I do it justice. And to help tide you all over for a bit longer, here is another bit that is both comedic and solemn. Enjoy!

��Chimney basically outed me to the team today. So now they all know I’m gay and have a boyfriend.” Eddie tells Buck when he slides into the bed, gently nudging their black coat retriever mix Jade from her resting place next to the man who first bought her home.  She huffs in displeasure and leaps down, padding out of their bedroom, most likely heading to Christopher’s room. His boyfriend quirks an eyebrow, “Outed you? Have you even been trying to hide it? I thought we agreed-“ Eddie groans, “I know what we agreed too, and I wasn’t hiding that I’m gay, but I’m not going around saying, ‘Hi I’m Eddie Diaz from Houston and I only like dick.’” Buck chokes on a laugh, but lets him continue, “I’ve been calling you my partner, no gender attached.  But then there were these girls at this awful country bar and they were being very persistent-“ “And you got annoyed, so you pulled the gay card.” He snorts, “Told them I have a boyfriend and I guess the team overheard, or my voice just carries really well, I don’t know. But anyways we get in the truck and Chimney just blurts out, ‘You’re gay?’ and it was all downhill from there.” Buck is shaking the bed with how hard he’s laughing, “Oh my god, Eddie! He didn’t out you, you did that yourself!” He groans again, burying his face in his hands in embarrassment, “It was such a mess! Hen and Ravi, we’re trying to defend me, and then I snapped at all of them about privacy and then my Captain is giving me an open invitation to team gatherings outside of work, while also inviting you and Christopher. He even tried to show his support by casually mentioning his wife’s ex-husband and his male fiancé. Like what is with straight people name dropping any gay person they know when someone comes out to them. I was nice about it and all. Even said I would come by with Christopher some time, then lied my ass off about the whole group thing not being your scene.  Which is ironic really considering you are literally apart of a large ass group for a job.” His partner has gone quiet beside him, the air around becoming solemn.  Eddie unburied his face and looked over to find Buck wringing his hands together, despondent, and guilty. Eddie’s heart clenched because he knew why. Buck hated how many lies they had to tell, that had Christopher and Maddie and everyone else who knew their secret had to tell, just so he could continue to play out his dream. And it was because of all the secrets and lies that they were all left out on different parts of each other’s lives.

Tagging (no pressure and apologies for extra tags): @elvensorceress @thewolvesof1998 @bekkachaos @transbuck @cowboy-buddie @shortsighted-owl @ebdaydreamer @hippolotamus @911onabc @911-on-abc @alyxmastershipper @thekristen999 @lizzybizzyzzz @monsterrae1 @prostheticknowledge

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

There's something about the Unburied spin off bringing in Jean Paul/Azrael right when you're reading through his comic appearances. Is there something you like about his characterisation in it or is it all bad?

the timing is BANANAS I cannot escape from this man!

but to answer your question like genuinely NO and it's because Jean-Paul doesn't really like... HAVE a characterization in Secrets in the Dark? or rather, he does, but that's not. that's not Jean-Paul.

like JP having no prior personal connection to Batman before he starts vigilante-ing is weird, and so is him apparently just deciding to go rogue as Azrael rather than being conditioned into it from childhood by his dad and the order, but the way he's set up as having been an uptight religious extremist from an early age is really where I draw my line on this one. hello hi, he MAIMED is roommate?? pre-Azrael Jean-Paul was Literally Just Some Guy! he was studying computer science, man! he was not a violent dude, all of that comes from the system and the hell training he got after his dad was murdered! idk, it really seems like the writers got the cliffsnotes on Azrael and just ran with "religious Batman who kills people" without wanting to look any deeper into what actually drives the character.

JP is filling kind of a similar role as Cornelius Stirk did in Unburied; they're both filling the role of being the most initially visible antagonist who presents an initial problem to solve but is actually being controlled by something way more convoluted than simple homicide. but even though Stirk is ultimately just a tool for Ivy, he gets a relatively large amount of development as a person! especially through listening to his sessions with Strange, you really get to see how he was pushed further and further into embracing his worst delusions and homicidal cannibal tendencies and how he got warped into being a tool for Strange and Ivy to use; it makes him a lot more sympathetic and shows how his vulnerabilities were exploited by the corruption within Arkham. it fits very well in a series that's surprisingly sympathetic to its rogues - Eddie being an unambiguously sympathetic victim of police framing and brutality, Batman apologizing to Tut for the medical abuse he experienced, Ivy herself starting out as a victim of abuse and sexual harrassment and ultimately abandoning her plan when she's won over with the power of gay love. the only villain in Unburied who DOESN'T get any humanizing moments at all, in my opinion, is Strange, and that's because he was a man who was 100% in a position of power over the people he was hurting and get that narrative sympathy.

Secrets in the Dark has kind of a weird moment of trying to have its cake and eat it too. it wants to make textual a lot of those more subtly presented ideas about criminals as people that started in Unburied, with Eddie repeatedly emphasizing the injustice of society looking away from convicted felons and treating their lives as expendable, while also like. presenting Azrael as a one-dimensional religious zealot who gets almost no interiority and is easily manipulated by other characters at pretty much every turn. (which is extra wild because like??? HELLO. if we wanted to continue that theme of exploring wrong committed by people in power, the Catholic church was a GREAT place to do that!) and there just doesn't really seem to be a satisfying stance on that other than, I guess, the Riddler is the POV character, so the murderers that he likes are fine but the one he doesn't like is fair game.

I uuuuuuuh had more feelings about this than I thought I was going to when I sat down to type this actually. justice for my boy Jean-Paul, that wasn't him.

[just-an-enby-lemon]

Batman Unburied for the fandom blorbo ask game?

Oooh. I'm soo excited.

Okay. Okay. Let's go.

Blorbo - Riddler, I would say obviously but Barbara also deserves it, the thing is Edward is always my blorbo and Unburied is one of my favorite Eddies so he is blorbo. Okay. Actually they can share. They are a duo for a long part of the show, they can be my double blorbo.

Scrunkly - okay. Eddie. But he is already blorbo so instead I'm gonna say Bruce. He is super badass but also super cute and caring and I love him. He definitivaly opens my protective agression (though realistically he would be the one protecting me).

Scrimblo Bimblo - Barbara. Now hear me out: she is very apreciated but I personally think she still deserves more apreaciation. Pam is on the same vein. Until people are workshipping this woman isn't enough.

In a more accurate definition both King Tut and Reene Montoya. Love them, unapreciated, deserved more screem time.

Glup Shitto - Again Reene and Tut. But like real obscure the employeers from Wayne Tech from that one scene and the henchmen that was voiced by Griffin McElroy. [Honorable mention Summer Gleyson, loved her, she should be a radio host more].

Poor Little Meow Meow - Eddie. He is everything. But also Pamela, owner of my hearth, she is perfect, love her, she deserves the world but she is sorta problematic, I mean I believe she did nothing wrong but I was told murder, kiddnaping and planning to wipe out humanity and all we did to give Earth back to the Green is frown upon by modern society. I woind't call her pathetic but none of her plans suceeded so maybe a bit due to unfortunate circunstances (now besides Eddie this would be the perfect place for Stirk but, controversial opinion, I have no feelings towards him whatsoever, he had good scenes but I care very little for Stirk as a person).

Horse Plinko - with love? Probably Eddie, Pam or Babs, maybe Bruce. With the power of hate? Flass and Strange. Just because I think their reaction would be funny? Jervis and Stirk.

Eeby Deepy - Flass. I hope he dies a violent, humiliating and painfull death. I hate him sooo mucn.

[bathtub4rats]

tell me facts about your batman unburied riddler NOW/nf

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OKAY SO (im going to assume you meant beyond?)

He's just another kid that goes to Terry's school, he's one of those types of villains.

He's very smart of course and is very good with engineering and electronics, he makes a lot of his own gear- like his digital emote mask, his cane, and his hoverboard (which i totally didn't just draw Sonic's board from Sonic Riders for the Gamecube) And he gets upset when his skills are challenged

I think he doesn't actually commit any crimes, he's very careful about that hes trying to graduate with honors and can't be fuckin up his 4.0- so he's just a pain in the ass. I think he'll set up elaborate plans and pull Batman into a whole riddler thing just to waste his time in the end for fun

I think he spray paints clues and his riddles on building walls or leaves intricate mechanical statues and stuff around for batman to find, and it'll all imply stuff like someone's going to bomb the clock tower and its just nothing,

At school, he doesn't talk to people much

he always has headphones on and ignores anyone who tries to talk to him, bc of this everybody assumes he's listening to music and just says whatever around him, but he hears it he knows a lot of secrets

He has joint issues, maybe hypermobility idk, so he uses a cane a lot and often has knee braces on (Also why he has a hoverboard, it hurts a lot less than running would)

And I think he's very into retro stuff and like batman history, bc we Know that Riddler did exist in this universe bc Bruce has an animatronic version of him, so I think This Eddie learned about the first riddler and thought fuck yea I love riddles and just became the riddler 2.0

edit: OH OH HIS CANE!! the cane handle latches onto his belt with a magnet and when he takes it off and the magnets disconnect it extends out into a cane, otherwise its just the handle

Thats all I have thought up in the brain, If i think of anything else I'll for sure add it on later

if you're looking for my doodles I've tagged them all as Beyond Riddler :)

[the-firebird69]

They're saying that mom is around it will attract interest but she's in a tomb and I'm not aware of the status of that some say it's OK and I understand the idea but If you're trying them back to normal you're countering the max plan and they're becoming superheroes and real people again. She was buried and preserved for now looks like she moved to Utah And it does not seem like you guys have many scribbles scruples and a bunch of jerks but took a lot of her blood I need mass and other hospitals and Trump's blood did not test out that great it is under investigation by his own people too to see why he's doing that.

So we're going after him and we're going to make him pay. This guy Trump is a pig in a moron and he's useless it's like having nobody there except a porcupine we need him out and we're gonna put him out of here. There's several things he's doing right now that are annoying they're gonna make him pay using them against him. One is he keeps having our son see the red cab light says it's a ambulance light 'cause he's a **** a **** man a gifted man. And we're going to go after him for the rest of his threats. Now we have an update and John Remelard AKA Trump is losing it all just as he made so many because he's a weakling no he's a mean person and an **** and the macproper are too

-- We have several things to say the Mac proper are engaging trump and finding out that he's been sitting here telling people about them and that there in a lot of trouble and their people are dying and they found out that a lot of them are dying. They also found out that their bunkers are infiltrated by a lot of people in different ones and all over the world and it's because of Trump And they're on the warpath. We are going to double our efforts on trump right now he's interrupting all the time and he's a excited **** and a **** we need him out,.

-- The Eastern Hemisphere is not doing well. Have a bunch of missing people. More than half of their independent military bunkers are empty and destroyed one quarter of them are pretty much empty above that and the last quarter is being worked on they're going to be extinct below ground in adjust a couple days over there their stashes and caches are working out to be disappearing huge armies showed up later today after we posted and they're tearing them a new one out of the 3000 small there are now around 500 only that are not being emptied and no it's not they're not on New Zealand or Australia, out of the 300 large there are only about 50 that are not opened and they're going to be opened shortly. That is a lot of stuff coming out and Trump stirs are dying trying to stop them and they're dying at the bunkers and they're dying around them in the areas surrounding them all the way out to like a 1000 miles they are coming in and dying and they're fighting in situ and people went after them for devices and called and called huge armies are going after them. It's a massive war but it's going very fast. And out of the very large there were probably 40 30 of them are defenseless and are currently being emptied the numbers are so huge it's hard to believe but the idea of John Remallard was to push it overseas to force them to do stuff here and to do stuff remotely so far nothing. The remaining 10 large will be breached momentarily but seriously

There are a few people who say it's **** and they're right the stats are coming for next door basically on the small newer there about a half that are defenseless and they're ripping out about 500 at the medium half of them are defenseless plus about 20 and they're ripping out 100 they're big and then on the very large about 35 are defenseless and they're ripping out 20 and the Truthfully he doesn't have that much left and the statistics are going to be what they were stated as pretty soon

and the statistics are going to be what they were stated as pretty soon

Thor Freya

Olympus

Thank God my husband is getting unburied from this abusive animal next door and hopefully in time to save his life my husband's life is in jeopardy and I mean it we have to get to work now i'm asking my children to get this idiot animal next door out I need you to clean them out of here they're very dangerous

Hera

we shall and now

Savage Oppress

permission granted

Thor Freya we do it too now

[unbury-the-gays]

Hello, hi! I have some thoughts!

I'd like to point out that this elven heritage in the Cat's School is a bit of an exaggerated theme. It is true that this half of the witches, led by Gezras (the half-elf), survived after the Cat School schism. And it is true that this group fraternized with the elves, even adopting some of their weapons and fighting techniques. But in the end, most of the witchers of the Cat School were still human. All the witchers of the Cat School that Geralt meets are human. If they had some elven genes in them, it was not enough to manifest in their appearance. Brehen, Jad, Gaetan - everything in their physicality points to humans.

Also: in the Polish comic Betrayal, which can be considered at least partially canon because it was created based on Sapkowski's unused idea and the author's notes, all the witchers from the School of the Cat are also human.

Granted, Ireneus (mage who kidnapped Kiyan) mentions in his notes that Kiyan revealed the secrets of his school under torture, and there are many references to the school's ties to elves, but Ireneus doesn't note that Kiyan himself is of elven origin. And we know that he kept his disgusting diary very meticulously. He focused on Kiyan's endurance, and I believe that if Kiyan had elven blood in him, Ireneus would have taken note.

All in all I think it's reasonable to assume that the Cat School didn't mind turning elves into witchers, but the elves were in the minority anyway. So when it comes to the instability of cats, I don't think it's the species that matters. I think it was just their formulas and potions that were bad.

Despite the fall of the Witcher Order, other schools continued to maintain a certain tradition, working with mages on the trials. The Cats, on the other hand, not only murdered their mages, but also accepted badly mutated witchers from other schools into their ranks. Simply put, they didn't care about the technical side of the Trials. They transformed into witchers and accepted anyone, and they did so in a careless manner, without full knowledge of potions of the Grasses.

Anyway, despite my conclusion, I think the Cat School consisting largely of elves is an interesting concept. And I think it can be accepted as canon that they, of all the Witcher schools, probably had the most elves in their ranks, even if I personally believe that elves were not in the majority. Nor even half.

As for Kiyan, he is my beloved son. @gavilansblog and I have written some fix-it fic to save him from the hands of Ireneus. If you're interested, welcome!

Below are some of our works:

Unbury The Gays by Advena87, Gavilan :

Still Here - complete - The first time his friends disappeared, Kiyan was too young to understand.

Decision - complete - Kiyan, a young witcher on the Path, survivor of the pogrom, has a routine contract in a small and inhospitable town. Nevertheless, he decides to visit a local brothel in the hope that he will find nice company there and relax. He finds something completely different.

Who sows the wind, reaps the storm - main story, work in progress - The ruins of the elven palace Est Tayiar in Redania were mentioned several times in the records of the oldest cat school masters as a potential source of exquisite weapons and diagrams, but the records didn’t specify the exact location of the palace or what it had been, exactly, in its heyday. Either way, Kiyan had nothing better to do, except avoid headhunters, so he planned on spending this year on the path searching for treasures.

Mirror - complete - Witcher Kiyan has been saved from the hands of a sadistic mage, but this marks only the beginning of his journey to regain himself.

Dream - complete - Two years after Kiyan's rescue, the nightmares weren’t as vivid and painful as they had been in the beginning, especially with Adrien’s calming, familiar scent and warmth beside him. Calming, that is, except the nights that Adrien also suffered nightmares of his own.

Kadiz - work in progress - Kiyan was counting on a quiet afternoon, but his unpredictable prince decided to surprise him with an extraordinary gift. The witcher immediately sensed trouble, but as usual with Adrien's romantic ideas, it was definitely too late to stop the series of unfortunate events.

Gift - complete - Four years after being kidnapped by the mage, witcher Kiyan tries to lead a normal life on the Path. However, in the middle of the season, an unexpected meeting thwarted his plans.

Persimmons- complete - Kiyan does not need aphrodisiacs, thank you very much, Adrien.

Rendezvous in the woods - complete - The erratic prince insisted on rendezvous in the woods, and Kiyan reluctantly followed him to a secret place. And while Kiyan expected this date to be a dud, he hadn't anticipated the extent to which things could get out of hand.

We also have two fics in Modern AU.

Stray Cat - complete - "If a cat runs away, you should tie a bell around his neck. Then you will always know where he is."

Adrien doesn't know what's going on in Kiyan's life that keeps him running away, but he's determined to keep trying to build something with his mysterious stranger.

Golden Hour - complete - A really difficult client shows up at Kiyan's door. Little does Kiyan know that what seems to be a minor inconvenience will change his life.

98% of our work focuses on the Kiyan/Adrien rare pairing, but you might find something for you here! Either way, if you want to shower Kiyan with love, we are here to cooperate!

Advena (@advena87)

So we know from TW3 storyline with the Mad Witcher Kiyan that a lot of the cat school is made up of Witchers with Elven origins. But I’ve never seen anyone mention that this could be the reason they tend to be more unstable? Essentially they use mutations meant for humans (presumably) on descendants of elves and it’s probably a bit fucked. We know elven and human ancestry can physically mess up a person, like is shown with Yennefer, so were most of these trainees physically disabled in some capacity when they were brought to the Cat School? Is that why more schools didn’t adopt this method? Does it have to do with them being slightly closer to the Source and having a bit of chaos themselves which makes them more prone to mental illness? Thinking of Eskel being shown to have proficiency in signs due to his inclination to magic, it seems unlikely. So it must be something more physical/emotional. I don’t know, just pondering. Also, we under appreciate Kiyan as a fandom, please give this poor lad some love, I beg you.

[saintlike78]

A bet between lovers [B.B]

· · ───────── ·𖥸· ──────── · ·

Navigation

A/N: This starts out before Daphne and Simon are married, around the 2. episode.

Pairings: Benedict Bridgerton x fem!reader

Words: 1.9k

Summary: You believe that Daphne and the duke will be engaged before the end of the season… your husband on the other hand does not - why not bet on it?

Warnings: Major fluff, dialogue heavy and allusions to sex but completely SFW, also this skips a bit back and forth in time.

· · ───────── ·𖥸· ──────── · ·

“May I just say that you look quite handsome this evening, Mr Bridgerton,” you spoke over the music with a smile, a cheeky glint in your eye at the tightening of the hand on your waist.

“Oh, how you flatter me, dear Mrs Bridgerton,” Benedict grinned, holding you closer to him than what was socially acceptable, yet not close enough to cause a scandal in front of the ton - not that Benedict really cared if he caused a scandal or not, that much you had learned.

In Benedict’s mind, it did not matter if everyone thought him indecent; he wanted everyone to know that somehow, with the help of some higher power - god perhaps - he had managed to convince you to love him as he loved you. He had never seen himself as the type to marry or settle down, but you… you were the only exception. Even if your mama initially planned for you to woo and be courted by Anthony - things turned out a little different.

Benedict swung you about the room, making you laugh at his ridiculous antics. He was proud to make you laugh, to be the one to provide you happiness, even if he was making himself look absolutely ridiculous on the dance floor with you in his arms.

Once the last note of the music was strung, your breathing was heavy, and you had to practically haul Benedict from the dance floor and keep him from pulling you in for yet another dance.

“A break, please, my love… I will hardly be able to stand tomorrow if we were to keep dancing,” you breathed, gladly accepting the champagne flute from Benedict as he swiftly snagged two glasses from the passing waiter.

Benedict hummed with a smirk forming on his lips, “Ah, my dear, I do not think walking will be an option for you either way, with what I’ve got planned for you,” he said lowly before lifting the champagne glass to his lips to conceal his grin.

You gasped audibly, smacking him lightly on his arm, hiding your face behind the glass as well to hide the rising heat that crept up your neck.

Benedict chuckled, presenting his arm for you to hold onto as you stood and observed the madness of one of the many extravagant balls of the season.

You watched in delight as the duke of Hastings danced with your dear sister-in-law, smiling at how fond they had seemed to grow of one another in this short period.

The smile on your face only grew as you looked at Benedict, who seemed to frown at the happenings - not because of the dancing… no… but because of the possibility of him losing a bet to you… one made only this morning.

· · ───────── ·𖥸· ──────── · ·

“The duke will propose within the next couple of weeks, I am sure of it… did you not see the way he looked at Daphne during last night's ball?” You had concluded, clinging to Benedict as you enjoyed the soft morning sun shining on you through the large windows in your shared bedroom.

The chuckle Benedict let out vibrated below you, his hand softly tracing odd shapes down your back.

You unburied your face from his neck, looking at his amused expression, “are you laughing at me?”

Benedict tried to cover up another laugh, grinning at your feigned shocked face, “of course not, my dear… I was only laughing at how you love to jape,” he said with a kiss to your forehead.

“It was not a jape, Benedict! I am being perfectly serious,” you said, poking at his chest.

“Well, in that case, I would have to disagree with you, my love,” he said, pulling you closer to him - if that was even possible - breathing in as you relaxed against him once more.

“And why is that? The duke is certainly the most perfect suitor for Daphne… he’s rich, of good standing … and handsome.”

“Handsome?”

“Oh hush, you would have to be blind to think otherwise,” you giggled, kissing his chest lightly as he chuckled.

“Alright, go on, but enough about Simon Basset’s handsomeness,” he grinned, pinching your waist.

“All I am saying is that it is a match too perfect to ignore.”

“That might be true, but I can promise you, the duke will not marry… he has said so himself,” Benedict argued.

“You and I both know that minds can be swayed… for the right person,” you spoke softly, moving up to kiss your husband’s cheek.

“That is true, my dearest one,” he whispered, connecting your lips in a slow kiss. Parting your lips with his tongue, he stroked your cheek gently, soaking up the sweet sounds of your almost silent whimpers.

You breathed heavily as your lips parted, your forehead rested against his, “as I was saying… Daphne is the right person to sway the duke's mind.”

“I don’t believe the duke's mind can ever be swayed, my love,” Benedict mused, pulling you entirely on top of him, holding onto your hips with gentle hands.

Many thoughts ran through your mind, your hands resting against Benedict’s bare chest, fingers scratching idly.

Finally, an idea popped into your head, making you smile giddily.

“What is going on in that pretty mind of yours?” Benedict grinned, grasping at your chin.

“I propose a bet…- I win if the duke and Daphne are engaged within the season,” you smiled proudly, “and if for some completely ludicrous reason that they are not, you shall win.”

“How ludicrous indeed,” Benedict smirked, squeezing your hips, “but I accept the bet… and what exactly are we playing for, my sweet girl?”

“I shall play for pride… but I suppose you are free to choose your own prize,” you grinned, leaning down to leave a soft kiss against his lips.

“In that case, I definitely accept the bet,” Benedict chuckled, wrapping his arms around you, keeping you tight against him.

· · ───────── ·𖥸· ──────── · ·

“Are you not having a good time, my love? You look quite troubled,” you said as earnestly as you possibly could, trying your hardest to cover your smug grin behind your glass.

“You, my dear wife, are a teasing minx if I ever met one,” Benedict spoke quietly, an amused grin twitching on his lips.

“Oh, I see… you’ve finally come to terms with the fact that I am to win our little bet… I hate to say I told you so, but this is why you should always listen to your wife,” you sing-songed jokingly, squeezing his arm in your grasp.

Benedict only smiled, looking at you with true fondness in his eyes, shaking his head at your large grin that seemed to light up your face.

“I am sorry for teasing; you know I cannot help it,” you apologised with a smile, keeping your eyes locked with his as the sounds of the ton faded into the background.

“No need to apologise, darling…- and besides, the duke has not proposed yet,” Benedict winked teasingly.

You squinted your eyes at him, pursing your lips with a hum, “I suppose we just have to wait and see.”

Benedict mimicked your face but couldn’t hide his smile as he did, “yes, I suppose we do.”

Your staring competition quickly came to a halt as Anthony came scurrying over, “Benedict, go dance with your sister.”

Benedict’s eyes landed on his brother, frowning at him for interrupting your moment, “why shall I?”

“Go on! Might be good with a break from staring at your poor wife,” Anthony groaned, pushing at Benedict’s shoulder, causing him to let out an annoyed sigh.

“Very well,” he caved, placing his champagne flute on the windowsill behind him before turning to you and taking your free hand in his, “I shall be back before I can miss you too much,” he winked, kissing your glove covered hand.

· · ───────── ·𖥸· ──────── · ·

The many evenings passed with various balls ensuring you your win, until one day it seemed as if Daphne and the duke were a thing of the past.

Of course, Benedict would never gloat in the same way as you would, but he still carried a smug smile whenever Daphne danced with the Prince of Prussia instead of the duke.

You would only say, “the season isn’t over yet, my love,” with a knowing smile, trying to pretend that you weren’t absolutely terrified that your intuition was wrong and you should end up losing.

· · ───────── ·𖥸· ──────── · ·

The sun slowly rose above the fog, slowly casting light on the grey morning.

You sat, in bed, staring out of the large window as you waited for Benedict’s return. You weren’t exactly nervous that anything would happen to him, more so of him being arrested for taking part in aiding an illegal duel.

Not long after the morning fog had cleared did the trotting of a horse capture your attention. You rushed to the window looking as a very solemn looking Benedict rode up to your shared house, handing the reins to a servant as his boots landed on the gravelled ground.

Your feet padded against the floor as you ran down the steps to meet your husband at the door.

A surprised grunt left Benedict’s lips as you flung yourself into his arms, hugging him tight before checking him for any injury, “Is everything alright? Did anything happen? Is Anthony alright? Is Simon?” You rambled, cupping his cheeks in a gentle grasp.

“Everyone is alright,” he assured, holding onto your waist as he leaned into your touch.

“Then tell me what has happened? You look as if someone has died,” you worried, stroking his cheek to ease his distress.

Benedict sighed, “no one has died… but I do have terrible news.”

“What?”

“Daphne… is to be married… to the duke,” he finally said after a long pause, hanging his head.

It took a mere moment for the words to process in your mind; a confused frown etched in your brow.

Only when you saw the tiny smirk on the corner of his lips did everything fall into place.

“Benedict Bridgerton, you absolute menace!” you exclaimed, hitting lightly at his chest as he chuckled.

You squirmed as he pulled you against his chest, holding you to him in a tight hug, “life would be quite dull if I weren’t, wouldn’t you think, my sweet, sweet girl?”

“Dull or peaceful?” You grinned into his chest, squealing at the pinch you received on your waist.

You let yourself enjoy his warm embrace for a moment before a thought struck you, forcing you to unhide yourself to stare up at his face with a smug grin.

“This means,” you whispered, leaning up to kiss his nose.

“Yes, my dear… you seem to have won our little bet… most surprisingly,” he grinned, whispering as you did.

“Surprisingly,” you grinned back, gripping onto the lapels of his coat, kissing both his cheeks slowly.

With slow steps, Benedict walked you backwards until your back hit one of the square pillars that decorated the foyer of your large estate - heavy breathing echoing through the hall.

“I have changed my mind… I no longer want my prize to be only pride,” you sighed between kisses, wrapping your arms around his neck.

Benedict smirked, gripping onto the thin fabric of your nightdress, “and what would you prefer instead?”

You gripped onto his face, pausing his exploration of your throat with his hungry mouth, forcing his gaze to meet yours.

“I wish for whatever you had planned if you were to win,” you whispered, leaving a sweet kiss to his lips.

As you pulled away, you were met with the look of your now very giddy husband.

“Your wish is my command, my love,” Benedict spoke quietly with a smirk.

· · ───────── ·𖥸· ──────── · ·

A/n: to be notified of future writing make sure to follow @saintlike78slibrary and turn on notifications

[finniestoncrane]

Headcanons for Riddler(s) finding out s/o has an OnlyFans?

Riddlers x SW!Reader

Riddler Headcanons this was the most fun to imagine, because if i wasn't unappealing, unfocused, lazy and unable to commit to more than one thing at a time i would enjoy having an onlyfans lmao but i could definitely see the mean green beans reactions and fuck it i added that twojar bastard because frankly i'm in love with him (blaming @riddlemeri and her exceptional fic for that but really it's my own lustful fault) y'all getting more bang for your buck, i can just keep adding riddlers until there are none left request info • prompt list • send me a request • kofi minors DNI!! 🔞 cw for nsfw stuff: sex work, suggestive language, daddy!kink

arkham

you know it would be very easy to hack into this thing. is there a way to scam though? what do you mean the DA is subscribed to you? and you haven't tried to blackmail him yet? oh sweetheart, let daddy take a look and see what we can do with this together. not to fall into my own headcanon of arkham!eddie being super into 80s pop, but he's definitely constantly humming that one line "i've got the brains, you've got the looks, let's make lots of money" to convince you that this is a good plan

unburied

he has one too! i mean it's just videos and pics of him jerking off in various spots in the prison uploaded with a phone he definitely shouldn't have. sometimes he chats with people too and lets them see his big money shots if they answer correct his riddles three. insufferable though, he absolutely will not be collaborating with you or even giving you a shout out because you're ranked waaaaaaay lower than him in popularity and he can't take that kind of hit babe.

young justice

baby's first jealous fit lmao. but once he's over it, it's kind of hot. you know YOU KNOW he is the kind of partner who would subscribe to you for the goods because he's such an absolute simp for you. and all he wants more than anything in the world is to see what outfits/hair/makeup/toys/anything you have planned for the evening before anyone else does, like a sneak peak. he also very much could get into watching you from another room even though you're right there with him

telltale

urgh so many questions. what is it why are you naked why are men commenting why are you getting money woah that's a lot of money why aren't you doing this more? but you're telling him that men are willing to pay this much money for something he gets for free? my god, the ego on this man. it has been blown up, out of proportion

gotham

urgh, disappointing that you would choose a form of making money that was legal when you could be out here doing far more criminal things. gosh! oh dear...you have a lot to learn still. also, while we're on the theme of things that disappoint him, if only you'd told him sooner he could have got you a spiffy little green outfit to wear. maybe something with some question marks on it. no he's not marking his territory, only stupid people get jealous and he's smart enough to know you still love him most...right?

twojar

ok first of all, when were you planning on telling him? second of all, why didn't you tell him sooner? and third, would you let him do stuff with you and become a couples channel? dude is into banging, dude is into money and dude is into you so a way to combine all three and get to show off that he's the one with his hands all over you? you are literally making his dreams come true

dano

hey it's like his stream! except yours makes money and his makes...untethered violence among the suggestible masses. maybe you can do a collab together, feature on each other's stuff? also he made his own logo, just in case you uh...wanted him to make you a logo too? branding is everything after all. either way you know after every stream he's dropping links to your content to boost you because he's a supportive digital literate partner

capullo

absolutely not into it in the slightest and will get overwhelmingly jealous about the idea of other people getting to see what he thinks should only be his. not that he's into monogamy, he's just a possessive and jealous and insecure asshole. on the plus side though, he will give you an allowance of the amount you were making if you want, if you stop doing it, and no no no, he insists

[emma-d-klutz]

Ok the explosion of affection I felt immediately at Batman Unburied's Riddler being a condescending little jackass made me, like, really click in my mind how I feel about the character in a way that I can word now. And keep in mind, this is just going to be MY personal feelings and preferences and not real character analysis with reasoning behind it, so like if you feel differently, I'm not saying your take is wrong.

We good? Ok.

I think Riddler's best as an ally rather than an antagonist.

Why? Because he feels most like himself to me when he's just a little guy. A silly little billy with a genius intellect that he wholeheartedly devotes to riddles and puzzles and escape rooms just because that's genuinely what he’s passionate about and how he wishes to spend his time, and he will steal, hack, blackmail, and even take hostages as a means alone to this life's calling. He is a person who needs everyone everywhere to know all the time that he is the smartest and cutest person in the room or so help him god. He deeply loves Batman/Bruce Wayne in the way one who unironically called themself a “sapiosexual yandere” an online rp forum back when they were 14 deeply loves, and he will throw a tantrum if he doesn’t get enough attention. He roasts and gets roasted. He annoys and gets annoyed. He is just a funny little guy to me!

Now here's the issue:

In Gotham, rogues can be funny. Goofy - wacky even! It is in many ways encouraged. Securing your own campy gimmick is integral to getting into the rogue business there, and they mean it, the campier the better. HOWEVER, a rogue must still be seen as a threat. A real threat. Otherwise, you are nothing but a third string gag character.

So what is one to do with Eddie, who is a main and major rogue of Gotham's gallery so high ranking and OG he can contract and subjugate lower level villains into his plans and who is also just a funny little guy with motives that do not necessitate mass killings or disabling psychological torture? Well, I have seen properties tackle this by making him into a real threat with new or expanded end goals, and I have also seen properties decide to make him pathetic and snubbed, sadly relegated to a dejected gag.* And I don't particularly dislike or disrespect these as a whole. I'm more lukewarm to them, I guess. They still have my affection, but it is proportionally incomplete.

But when you make him an ally?

Well now! That’s a horse of a different color!!!

When Riddler’s an ally he can be competent and taken seriously while also being entirely a silly little guy who is insulting you and bragging. Full bombastic personality and full respectable skillset. AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH!! When he works as an ally, I go from “Eh, it’s the Riddler,” to becoming putty in this character’s gloved little jazz hands! And it’s not even about if he’s actually a reformed “good guy” or not. It’s entirely about letting him be powerful without making him scary. Er, to the audience. (You know, like how we know the Batfam scares the shit out of everyone, but as the audience, we’re not scared; we just think it’s funnier and cooler, because we’re in on it? I realize I’m overexplaining, and I thank you if you have read this ramble this far.)

I think comparable examples are Catwoman and Harley Quinn. Big, big name villainesses, yes. But Selina has always been more of a career thief than a coldblooded killer, and since she has a romance with the Bat, we don’t think of her as anything but an ally even when she continues to act as a rogue. She is allowed to cool and respected as a character without having to be the kind of crime you expect Batman to spend his time prioritizing. Harley, on the other hand, seems much more prone to murder now and forever, but because we always knew it was something she had been pulled into by the Joker, the audience already kind of saw her as an ally, and she often is one. Now she’s just a freewheeling antihero with a girl gang of roller derby baddies and other villainess/ex-villainess friends, associates, and love interests. And she’s still herself! She is just a funny little chick with a M.D.! She is bombastic and adorable and still very much able to pull her shit off. She annoys and is annoyed. A gremlin girl if you will. She is the easiest parallel, and I do not think it is pure happenstance that one of the times Eddie turned coat, she was involved in (and all the sirens were clients to) his detective agency. Nor, would I say, is it a coincidence that Eddie and Selina have also had a longterm friendship that’s-sometimes-slightly-more. Similar things are going on here, yaknowhaddimean?

But for some reason, Eddie’s switch to ally is the one of those three that just never sticks. And I have no theories as to why at this time. I just think, personally, that being a weird little grey-area character that is usually on the same side of the heroes is the best place for him. It is where he can best express being both a worthy rival and a little guy with glasses. You wouldn’t hit a guy with glasses, would you? Oh, you would. Ok.

Thank you for coming to my TedTalk, and goodnight. 

*Shout out to instances that split the difference and go, "The Riddler will mislead Batman into thinking he's a real and present danger, but the punchline is no humans were harmed and he has tricked the Batman into playing riddles with him and hanging out." Those feel like an achievable, believable compromise and also are always funny/cute.

[swedethings]

"Oh, tack. Thank you." Agnes was very grateful for Amara's help in fetching the chocolate milk. Trying to reach over her son wasn't exactly working out with how much he was curled against her. She would've had to try and hold him and get up to reach the drink; so the other's assistance was very much appreciated. And she'd opened it for her too! Taking the milk, she momentarily shifted her focus back to Gunnar. "Mjölk? Kan du dricka mjölken?" With some reluctance, the toddler unburied his face and turned towards the chocolate milk. He eyed it for a long second before reaching out his little hands. "Försiktig. Spill inte." While he was old enough to handle a sippy cup by himself, he still struggled with milk or juice boxes; so Agnes had plans to support him while he drank.

As he took a sip of the chocolate milk, the Swede allowed her attention to shift back to Amara. The other's words brought a wide grin to her face. She let out a soft chuckle. "I know I will not get cuddles like this from him forever. So I treasure them." There was also the fact Agnes wanted to do everything within her power to be the kind of mother to Gunnar that she wished her mother had been to her. She wanted her son to know his mamma loved him more than anything in the universe, that she wouldn't hesitate to give her own life for his. "Min mor was not around for me when I was little. When Gunnar was born, I told myself I would never let that be the case for him." And she meant it.

"Oh, uh, I think we are good for now... You can look at the recipes now if you want? They are in that folder." Since her hands were currently occupied with helping her son drink his chocolate milk without spilling it all over the pair of them, she gestured with her head in the direction of the stroller. After picking Gunnar up out of the stroller, she'd moved the manilla folder to the seat for easy access. It was currently resting there, filled with kladdkaka recipes as well as a few other select recipes she thought might be nice to share.

Amara understood being shy around strangers. It was a common reflex, especially when you were that young. She was patient though and if she and Agnes were going to spend time together, then eventually Gunnar might warm up to her. After all, it took a while for Tallulah's daughter Miranda to warm up to her. "That's okay. We have time. He'll learn to like me enough," she said with a laugh. The patience of a mother was so important. Amara thought about her own mother and how patient she had been while the kids were growing up and Agnes reminded her of it. She noticed that Agnes had tried to reach for the chocolate milk and grabbed it for her, opening it up in the process. "Please, I can grab it for you."

The other sat down on one of the chairs across from the bench, just to make Gunnar feel a bit comfortable and to give Agnes space to parent. "Honestly, I'm amazed by the patience you have and the control to not just want to get him off of you," she complimented. "I'm glad you still chose to come and you're welcome to stay as long as you'd like. Is there anything I can get for the two of you? I can look over the recipe and such afterwards." Amara wanted it to be a seamless as possible of a day for Agnes and to help her spend a day with her son but also not feeling like she was a bother of any sort.