#we also haven't done enough to protect the place from it when we knew it was gonna happen eventually so the effect was worse

[bluastro-yellow]

YES companies are using climate change discourse to make profit and not really help the situation YES climate change is real and very dangerous. the two things can coexist

[simpee9000]

Not Just Friends - 6 -

M.List : Prologue : Part 1 : Part 2 : Part 3 : Part 4 : Part 5 : 5.5k words

Childhood best friends turned into something more, at least with the label. Katsuki Bakugo, a fast-rising hero and fast-learning guy who is ever so slow in getting attached to and loving someone. Even three long years into a relationship, and your friends even forget you're even dating. Nothing happening, spare a few kisses.. like 3 kisses, during high school. Graduated and living together, and you guys have done absolutely nothing to further the relationship. Are you sure you're not just friends? Also not edited!! CW: Smut, brief domestic violence discussion, virginity loss, aggressive flirting from creeps, gore with pro hero stuff (lmk if i missed any) Applies to all chapters regardless of it is in said chapter.

"Photos have been released, of the two of you," you shared a look with Katsuki from across the table, "Together. At the camping resort you went to this previous weekend."

Katsuki's PR manager was in front of you. Arms placed on the table as she clasped her hands together. Face stern and hair slicked back into a ponytail. The definition of professional. The opposite of what you looked and felt right now. You've been sweating your ass off since you got told to come in.

"Are you sure they know it was us?" Katsuki fixed his posture, sitting up straight for the answer to his question. The two of you haven't necessarily came forward with your relationship, but you haven't been hiding it. Still, you preferred to not be public. Mainly to protect your work, everyone would discredit you if they knew you had personal ties to the number two pro hero that led beyond friendship. But also because you knew the danger, you were targeted enough as his best friend.

"Yes," she said bluntly.

"Maybe they didn't see me?" you voiced your hope aloud.

"Look, they know it was the both of you," she sighed, "We need to focus on how to fix this. It needs to be address before it gets worse, and it will get worse, so I suggest acting now."

"Can I see the fucking pictures?" Katsuki ordered, sick and tired of not knowing entirely what's going on.

She clicked away at her keyboard, turning her laptop to face you two. "This was posted by a couple that were there," she showed the photo Katsuki took with the couple that almost caught you at the pond. "And this," she clicked to a photo that showed the lake, "was posted as well. You can clearly see Chargebolt, Red Riot, and Cellophane. And in the background it is also easy to see the two of you being," she coughed, "intimate. They've been able to connect the dots that it was you that he was kissing," she looked at you, "With your connection with their class."

Your stomach dropped. Words just fell from your brain. You were used to the press but not for these reasons. Mainly just for your work, or how you made all number one, two and three top heros support gear and costumes.

"So what the fuck should we do?" Katsuki crossed his arms, face scrunched in thought.

"We need you to make a statement," she paused, prepared for Katsuki to snap. He hated making statements. When all he did was nod, she continued, "We need to do this quick before rumors catch wind." Both you and her were glad that he wasn't being difficult about this.

"What rumors can even be made?" you were curious how bad the drawback could be, trying to see if you could lessen the stress for you and Katsuki.

She looked at you, an apology on her face already, "It is already being said that you are using him to get to Deku, wanting to get the best pro heroes under you." You physically winced. "It is also being said you are cheating on Deku with Dynamight."

Katsuki scoffed, rooling his his eyes as he threw his hands up, "So what the fuck do I say? This is bullshit."

"I've arranged a interview for tonight, they'll ask about it there and you will give as much truth as you want. Talk about how long you've dated and the bond you two have, you need a united front," She explained, "Deku needs to also make a statement that you have not had any romantic relations," she turned to you.

"Of course, I'll call him now," you stood up from your chair, grabbing your phone. Knowing that he was terrible with emails and likely wouldn't notice anything happened until it was too late for the press. Too focus on crime and other heroic things.

"Good, tell him to do it as soon as possible," she instructed.

You squeezed Katsuki's shoulder on your way out, leaving him to discuss about what to talk about in the interview.

Dialing Izuku's number the second you closed the door, walking towards the stairway so you could walk off the stress as you made your way to Katsuki's office, the next floor up.

He answered when you opened the door to the stairway, "Whatssup?"

"I need a favor," you immediately started with.

"What's wrong," he asked concerned. You could hear the wind blowing through his phone, he was likely jumping his way back his office.

"Could you do an interview tonight or something?" you walked up the stairs while talking to him, letting your body move on autopilot and lead the way to Katsuki's office.

"For what?"

"Katsuki's and my relationship got leaked, picture proof and everything," you confessed, "Now there's rumors that I'm cheating on you or some shit." You ran the hand that wasn't holding the phone through your hair. Before dropping it to open the stairway door, keeping your head down as you walked through the office.

"So I need to clear the air?" he concluded, you could hear him land on a building, taking a break from jumping.

"Yes, please," you sighed, "Just talk about how we're best friends. I don't think you have to do an interview, I think a social post might help, ask your manager."

"Of course, I'm happy to help," he smiled, "How are you and Kacchan doing?"

"I'm a little rattled, I didn't think this would happen," you opened the door to Katsuki's office, briefly waving to his manager. "I don't know how Katsuki is doing, he's still with his PR manager."

Izuku laughed nervously, "He's going to kill me."

"It's not your fault," you reassured, "he knows how crazy the internet is." You stood in front of the window, it was a floor to ceiling window that captured the view of the city perfectly. "Uraraka won't be mad right?" you asked, you've never been close to her but you knew her and Z were together.

"No, she'll understand," Izuku confirmed.

"Good, I would of felt horrible," the weight on your shoulders was slowly lifting.

"Well, I should talk to my manager about what to do," Izuku said his goodbyes before he hung up.

It was only Tuesday and your week was already shit. Barely got through lunch before his manager told you to meet with PR. The city was still buzzing with life, unbothered by how much yours was changing. It felt weird, to know each of the small humans from this distant, had their own life and motivation.

"Hey."

You jumped from your spot near the window, "Asshat," you said clutching your heart.

"How are you doing?" Katsuki stepped into the office, letting the door fall shut as he walked to stand beside you.

"I've been better, you?" you looked at him, his face was still scrunched with thought.

"I'm annoyed," he said plainly, "The one fucking time we kiss in public and it's everywhere."

He crossed his arms, his elbow slightly bumping you from where he stood. You hummed your agreement, "When's your interview?" The both of you were looking out the window, trying to puzzle together how to avoid the drawback.

"Right after work, with fucking Heroes' Gossip," he grumbled.

"I'm sorry," you apologized, knowing how much he hated every part of this.

"Was gonna happen eventually," he sighed, "Is that nerd gonna help?"

You nodded, "Yeah, he might make a social media post or something, I told him to listen to his manager."

"Good," he said plainly, letting the conversation end.

Everything was going to change now, it'd be impossible to go back to normal now. With the grief of your old life already setting in, you rested your head on his shoulder. He'd be the one stable thing, even if it got rocky.

---

You had the interview pulled up on the TV, waiting for Heroes' Gossip to introduce him. They've been teasing a surprise guest the entire show, waiting until the last few minutes to bring him on. You've been dealing with the show for the past 40 minutes with no sign of him. It was nice to watch for once though, but it felt like you were intruding on some of the topics. They brought up Mirko's lovers and then talked about spotting Best Jeanist in and out of the hospital, automatically assuming he had a horrible disease. It made you feel gross to watch.

Wondering into the kitchen you grabbed a glass of wine, wanting something to help make the show a little less painful.

When you sat back down they finally announced for Katsuki to come on. Having him grumpily stomp on set until he sat down near the obnoxious interviewer.

"So, Dynamight," she addressed him head on, "There's been some photo's leaked of you and the tech genius," she announced your name to the world. You took a long sip, trying to shake the unease feeling for being known as someone who was with Dynamight rather than a tech genius. The interviewer displayed the pictures his PR manager showed you earlier on screen, "Is this you and her?"

"Yeah," he answered flatly.

"So you and her were making out at this lake, correct?" She pushed, surprised she got this far already.

"Yeah, what about it?" you could see that he was close to snapping, face furrowed entirely as his arms were crossed.

"Despite the claims of her and pro hero Deku being together?" the interviewer smiled, glad to see she was riling him up.

He rolled her eyes, "As if she'd date him."

"Is she not?"

"No, I've been dating her for three god damn years," he confessed to the public.

The interviewer blinked in surprise, quickly getting back onto the questions, "You're not concerned they are seeing each other behind your back?"

"I've known them both since I was five, they aren't like that," he answered simply.

"That also means that they have known each other that long, you're not worried about their connection?" she pushed for more, irritated that Katsuki wasn't lashing out like normal.

"Lemme prove it to you dumbasses," you cringed at his swearing, it wasn't good press for him to swear during interviews. He was grabbing his phone out of his pocket, quickly pressing buttons before he put the phone on speaker, letting everyone listen to it ring.

"Hey," Izuku's bubbly voice echoed through the mic.

"Are you fucking with my girlfriend?" Katsuki was straight to the point, likely not having warned Izuku of his plan before hand.

"No! Why would i do that?! You know that it is just the press going on right? Anything for a story-" before he could ramble on anymore, Katsuki hung up on him.

"See?"

"Well that doesn't prove much," the interviewer was at a lost for words at this point.

Knowing that Katsuki had a handle on this, you walked back to the kitchen, looking for something to eat. All the premade dinners were eaten already so you'd have to cook something from scratch. The voices from the TV faded from your mind as your rattled through the ingredients to use. Deciding on a fried rice. You pulled out the vegetables and placed them to the side as you set the rice to cook.

Your phone buzz and you answered without a thought, "Sup?"

"You fucking Deku?" you laughed at Katsuki's angry voice coming through your speaker. "Stop laughing dumbass."

"Sorry, I just saw you call him for the same thing. No, I am not. I'll say that on a truth quirk as well," you said absentmindedly cutting up the vegetables.

"Great! We'll have you come in soon to do just that," you heard the interviewer cheer though Katsuki's side of the phone.

Katsuki grumbled, "I'm fucking out of here." You could only assume he left the set, hearing him stomp off. "Hey dumbass," his voice was near the mic, clear he turned the call off speaker as his voice was quieter and less aggressive.

"Yeah?"

"That was stupid, my PR agent is going to scream at you."

"Why?"

"Going under a truth quirk on TV is dangerous, you know so much confidental shit," he explained.

"Oh fuck," you realized how much you could spill if someone asked about too much. You felt as if the genius quirk you had wasn't much help.

"I'll be home soon," he skipped past it, saving the conversation for when he could see you.

"Okay," you nodded despite him not being able to see you, "I'm making some fried rice by the way."

"Thanks, see ya."

"Bye."

You put your phone back down, grabbing the now cooked rice and mixing it with the vegetables in a pan. You looked over the mess of the kitchen. You dirtied an extra pan for eggs last second, knowing Katsuki loved the extra protein. Walking back to the living room, you grabbed the wine glass and filed it some more in the kitchen to drink as you mixed the rice.

The rice was getting to a good mixture, just needing to heat for a little longer, you grabbed the eggs and dumped them in with the rest of the rice and vegetable, setting the pan aside on the stove.

You heard the door knob slightly move, as if Katsuki was having issues with the key. You glanced at the time, he wouldn't be over for another ten or so minutes. Fear gripped at your chest. You moved the finished pan of rice to the corner of the stove, putting the empty pan on the heat.

Before you could think of anything else to do, you heard metal fall to the ground. Turning around quickly you saw the doorknob melting off with the remains of it on the floor.

Looking towards the figure in the doorway you saw a girl, around your age. Maybe a couple years older. She looked insane, it sent a chill up your spine at how similar her glare was to Toga's. Her eyes were a bright red, her hair a darker shade as she wore torn up clothes, burn holes all throughout. As if she just got out of a fight.

"The fuck are you doing?" you forced yourself to question.

"So you're the bitch Katsuki is dating?" she ignored your question.

"How did you get up here?" you knew that the apartment probably wasn't the most secure, but you and Katsuki never had time to move. Still, security was set in place. Blood dotted her outfit as well, the smell of burnt flesh radiating off her.

She ignored you again, stepping closer. "You know, Katsuki's going to love me right? Once your out of the picture."

You couldn't help the slight laugh that slipped from your lips. Maybe Katsuki's cocky energy affected you more than you thought.

Her eyes glowed, "That funny to you?"

She was about arms length away at this point, you reached your arm slowly behind you, grabbing onto the handle of the pan. "Kinda," you shrugged.

"Such a cunt," the girl all but screeched, eyes glowing red. From the damage on the doorknob it was clear she had some sort of heat vision. Before she could burn hole through you, you picked up the pan and swung at her. Burning the side of her face and causing her to stumble. Keeping yourself aware of her eyes, you reeled the pan back and hit her straight on, letting the edge of the pan fall into her eyes.

She quickly started to grab at you, cornering you into the stove, blinded by your hits but still intent on hurting you. Digging her nails into your arm. Scratching as she managed to grab ahold of your hand during her flailing around, forcing it down onto the hot stove and burning you.

Filled with a new rush of adrenalin, you grabbed onto her hair with your free hand, yanking her off your hand and pushing her face into the stove. You felt horrible as she screamed, your and her burnt flesh tainting the air with a foul smell. Ruining the stove top in the process. You scrambled away from her after holding her down for a moment, grabbing the knife you used the the vegetables only 20 minutes ago. Almost slipping due to the wine that was spilt from her flailing around the stove.

You stole a glance at the clock, still five more minutes till Katsuki was home. All you had to do was not die in those five minutes.

The girl was standing back up when you looked back at her. Face half burnt as she held a crazed look in her eyes.

"That knife won't do anything," she pushed, "I've done my research, you hardly have a quirk. Another reason you aren't worthy of him."

You weren't interested in talking to her, you just waiting for her next move. "You know, we could end this here. Just stop fighting and Katsuki will talk to you," you suggested, throwing the offer out to distract her.

"With you in the picture, he won't talk to me," she said frustratedly. Her eyes lighting up again, having recovered from the hit to them.

She aimed for your stomach, you move to the side and crouched, kicking at her locked knees, cringing at the snap of it. The hit on your stomach burned through a lot, the pain causing you to hold a hand on yourself. While you were trained to survive, you couldn't handle it. The blood, the pain, the guilt that already worked its way into your bones. She fell down with a yelp. Pulling you with her, before she could get her other hand on you, you stabbed one hand through a cabinet. You stood up as straight as possible, pressing your slipper covered foot onto her head, forcing her to face the cabinet and away from you. Placing your other foot onto her free hand so she couldn't grab at you.

You wheezed, clutching both hands at your side now, pain getting to you. The girl was crying now, "My face! He won't love me if I look deformed." Her heat vision flickered on and off, burning a hole through the bottom cabinet. Slowly destroying your home with Katsuki.

"Shut up," you hissed, stepping on her hand harder.

The injury was getting to you, it was mostly cauterized but her heat vision burned a good depth into your side.

Katsuki kicked the door fully open, snapping his head to look at you. You most of looked crazy. Wearing his shirt from high school, barely visible shorts, fuzzy Deku themed slippers and standing above a very injured girl while bleeding from the wound of your side.

He stepped towards you, lifting you off the girl and making you sit on the floor next to the door. "Cops were already called by the way," he answered your question before you thought of it. "They'll be up here soon." He walked back to the girl who was panting now, going into shock from the pain, something you think you shared with her. He cuffed her quickly, making her quirk shut off. You couldn't be more thankful that he wore his hero outfit home.

With the girl contained, he walked back to you, "Is it just your side?"

You nodded your head aggressively, in too much pain to form words. He lifted the side of your shirt, wincing before putting it back down. Moving to pick you up and carry you.

"I need to get you to the hospital," he claim.

"What about that girl?" you forced out, sucking in a deep breath after. Eyes getting fuzzy as you looked at him.

"She tired herself out," he confirmed, the girl passed out and you felt like doing the same. Eyes blinking without any of your control.

"Kats?"

"What?"

"It hurts," you were only speaking to stay awake, not wanting to scare him anymore then you knew he was.

"You'll be okay, I promise," his voice waivered as he moved through the hallways, you didn't even know where you were at this point. The background slowly turning into black until you blinked the rest of the image away.

---

Everything was too bright, too loud, too stale when you woke up. You couldn't even open your eyes but you were overwhelmed. You're mouth lacked any taste besides meticalic. Muffled voices came from somewhere in front of you, a room away likely. You braced yourself heavily before opening your eyes. Seeing Katsuki in a chair pulled up to your bedside, book in his left hand as his right hand held onto yours. Flipping a page by placing the book into his lap and using his left to flip it. Never once letting go.

The light blurred everything but him, you could only put together the fact that you were in the hospital. He was wearing his glasses, the ones he hardly wore unless he was stress. It was always harder for him to read when stressed, to lessen the strain, he wore the glasses.

"Bright," is what you decided to croak out, voice rough from sleep and likely screaming from the events. Everything was blurred already.

His basically jumped out of skin at the sound of your voice, letting the book fall from his lap as he stood up straight. Looking over you.

"Lights off," is what you groaned next, unable to keep your eyes open in the blare of it for long.

"Fuck sorry," he rushed to turn the light off before returning to your side. "How are you?"

You only looked around now, happy to be without the strain of the light. Your right hand was covered in bandages, from where the girl slammed it against the stove. With how bad it hurt, you worried for her face. Your left side was also heavily wrapped. She burned entirely through you, you remember how burned your walls were before you passed out. Multiple cabinets having holes in them. "Our home is all messed up," you focused on.

Katsuki let out a laugh, it was his laugh that showed you were being ridiculous, when you looked back up at him with a frown he returned it, "You can't be serious?"

"I am," you pouted, looking down at your hands, "She fucked it all up."

"Yeah and you put a dent in her for it," he followed.

"She put a dent in me too," you changed you focus to your stomach. Acknowledging the hole in your side

He gripped tighter onto the railing at the top of your hospital bed. "I had our stuff moved out," he spoke, saying he won't let that happened again without any words.

"Where will we live?" you looked back up at him.

"I bought it on a whim, the first day you were out," he looked apologetic, "I think you'll like it. Safer than that shithole."

You grabbed onto his hand, "Okay, anywhere is home with you."

"The drugs makin' ya loopy?" he smirk down at you, pointing fun at your cheesy line but holding onto your hand nonetheless, gripping on tighter.

"Maybe," you blushed, looking away for moment to think over the feeling. Drugs were definitely dampening the pain right now.

"How are you though? Took quite a hit," he looked at your stomach as well. It reminded you on how he first saw it, likely seeing straight through you. It's probably why he rushed you to the hospital right after.

"Hurts," you mumbled, not looking down but staring at him instead. Wanting your focus off the pain. Looking over how soft the glasses made him look. It was something you always wanted to admire but rarely got to. His face looked softer in the barely light room, just having the glow of the hallway lights shine in.

"Figures, you put up a fight."

"I almost died," you clarified.

"But you didn't," he was trying to focus on the positives, for both you and himself.

You recalled him saying the first day you were out earlier, "How long was I out?"

"Four days," he answered, "Not too long, you were just tired."

You hummed, "When can we go home?"

"I'd have to call the doctor in."

You nodded in permission for him to do so, letting him go alert them. With the quality of the room, you figured that he had you in a hero hospital.

The doctor walked in and asked you to stay an extra day, claiming a healing quirk will be able to help you before you left tomorrow. You reluctantly agreed, mainly from Katsuki cutting in and agreeing for you. It was obvious he felt guilt. From the way he held himself and the way he spoke.

When the doctor left, the two of you sat in silence. Soaking in each others presences.

"Is she okay?" you asked.

"Who?"

"Crazy bitch," you labeled her as.

He looked at you confused, "Yeah, in jail."

"So I didn't hurt her badly?" you were trying to relive some of the guilt.

"No, you did. Put a hole into her hand and burned her face," he confirmed, "Something you did to protect yourself."

"Then why do I feel bad?"

He sighed, grabbing at your hand again and looking you in your eyes, "Cause you always do, you'll probably feel guilty for a while. But trust me, you gave that bitch what she deserved and I'm so fuckin' glad you did."

"How's the press?" you switched topics. Not even remotely proud of yourself for burning a girl's face.

"Everything's settled, police still need your report though," he told you softly.

"Okay," you took in a deep breath, flinching at the pain going up your side. Ignoring Katsuki eyes looking at you in worry. Trying to patch your guilt away.

---

You peered through the apartment door after Katsuki unlocked it and walked through. Taking in the view of the apartment, a clear upgrade from the last. After kicking off your shoes you noticed the empty space to the right, a perfect spot for a living room. Windows from floor to ceiling and a sliding door to excess the balcony, with just enough space for a long wrap around couch to loop around. Snug in its own cube. The left side was a nicely sized kitchen with a dining table near the middle.

The security on the way up was worth the apartment, it was beautiful. It was a good sized apartment overall, perfect for you. There's a total of three bedrooms and three baths. You wondered for a moment about where Katsuki would choose his bedroom. Shoto also lived in this apartment complex, so you knew it was safe. The thought of Shoto's scar hurt your soul, he hated that scare and you gave a random girl the same if not worse.

"We need to buy new furniture for the living room," Katsuki cut into your thoughts.

"Why?" you turned to him confused, you didn't have a wrap around couch but he didn't know your ideas.

He coughed, knowing you hated the topic already, " Other one is burnt."

"Oh," you said sadly.

"I also can't get shit here until Tuesday. Takes a week for em," he barreled through the bad news, "You can look up a couch and I'll buy it."

"I already know the one I want," you looked back at the space, "I saw it Monday online, we can go check the stores to see if it's in stock? If not we can look."

"I don't think you should be doing all that walkin'," he furrowed his face in distaste.

"Too bad," you pushed past your injury, walking back outside the apartment after slipping your shoes on, "We have nowhere to sleep, we can get a couch and have a movie night. Wait, do we need a new TV?"

"Yeah, other one was shit anyway," he put his shoes on and followed you out reluctantly.

---

You pushed past all press, keeping your head down as you walked in front of Katsuki, his arms around you to keep from touching you. It was horrible, worse than it ever was. After your police statement was in, the press went crazy. Needing every detail possible. The entire furniture store had to shut down while you shopped, it made you thankful for Katsuki's job for once. He saved the owners before so they easily shut down for him. Finding your perfect couch was easy enough, wasn't the exact one you saw online but it was even better. While you found the couch, Katsuki got the TV, both set to be delivered to your apartment during the next three hours.

So you and Katsuki got lunch and stopped by his agency in the mean time, him needing to grab some paper work to go over the next few days. Kirishima's bright smile welcoming you the second you walked upstairs.

"Hey!" he greeted, arms stretched out for you. Hugging you gently. "How are you?" he held you back by your shoulders as he looked over you.

"Alright," you answered watching Katsuki walk into his office, "I hurt like a bitch though."

Kirishima laughed warmly, "No doubt, sorry that happened. What you did was super manly though."

You cringed, "I thought you left the manly thing in high school."

"I say it on rare occasions," he smiled down at you.

"Say what?" Katsuki asked as he closed his office behind him, joining you again.

"Manly," you answered, leaning into his space, feeling safe. He hummed in reply, smiling down at you briefly before looking back at Kirishima, crossing him arms.

"You got my patrols cover till Tuesday right?" Katsuki asked.

"Yeah, Denki, Sero, Mina, me and even Midoriya are all taking a chunk of your hours," Kirishima smiled brightly.

"Till Thursday?" you looked up confused, Katsuki hated time off.

Katsuki refused to look at you. LIstening as Kirishima talked, "You need a break and we got it covered, don't worry."

He rolled his eyes, "Send me every detail that happens, I'll be available if absolutely needed."

"Got it," Kirishima gave a toothy grin. Likely happy that he convince Katsuki to take time off in general. You weren't surprised at him being at the hospital, but taking a week off was unknown for him. Yet he seemed perfectly okay with it.

---

Once home, you noticed the fridge was fully stocked. Katsuki's premade meals filling the shelfs. Glad to see no fried rice. Fruit also filling the shelfs.

It was the first thing you went for when you got home, ignoring the wrapped up couch and TV and going for the food. Afterall, Katsuki would set up the TV fully. Needing to wall mount it.

With a premade meal in your hands, warm and ready to eat, you stood at the counter and watched him work.

"So I remember saying I'd do an interview with a truth quirk," you brought up after a while, Katsuki humming to continue from where we set up the TV. "How do I do that without giving up information?"

"Aizawa is probably willing to help, he'll monitor you and turn off the truth quirk person if they ask something sensitive. Still don't know why you said that," he answered, cursing at the TV when it didn't hook into the slot on the wall mount easily.

"Just want to clear my name," you took another bite of food as you watched him grin in victory at the TV being attached to the wall now. Him plugging it in and starting to log into all the streaming apps and everything.

You joined him after finishing your food, pushing a part of the couch into the spot you wanted. "The fuck are you doin?" he spun his head towards you at the sound of the couch moving. "I'll do it, just fuckin' point where to go."

After huffing at him, you stood in front of the TV, facing the couch and leading him to place each section of the couch. Cutting off the wrapping afterwards and sitting in front of the TV.

"What are we watching?" he called towards you, you were digging through the little amount of stuff that Katsuki pack for you two. It was clothes and blankets, all you'd need until Tuesday. It was already Saturday as well.

You plopped down a big blanket for you to share and sunk into the couch, "I don't know," you mumbled. Watching as he clicked onto your favorite movie right after.

"Hate when you say that," he grumbled.

"Yeah sure," you leaned into his side, wanting to be as close as possible to him. The scare of the break in still getting to you. He messed with his hand for a moment before laying his arm over your shoulders, pushing you closer to him. It was something both of you clearly needed. Just the warmth of the other.

-Next Part-

In them m.list of this fic comment if you want to be added into a tag list <3

I'll no longer add people to the taglist if they haven't commented there. It's too much to keep up with all the new part. Hope you understand <3

@ldk3347 @suki0 @ez4ra @mithicakurogo @aomi04 @ellielover69 @minori-taiga1 @54fangirl @zoast32 @mushroomsneedystuff @kazuumii @snxwflwr @keiva1000 @thescarletwallflower @juicyfingers @atashiboba @ofcqdesi @americasass1942 @kaboomkayla @ilovedenk-i @iamyoursonly @albakugo @venusluvslove @fairiesgloss @limitedstar @i-bitch-you-bitch @drageonix24 @sweetpandabiscuitrebel @sinyaaa @xreiiss @oddball08 @imsuperawkward @lomlchi @anime-manga-fanatic @irlpadfoot @lord-goosifur @chocoyanchan @gollumsmygel @yuptha-tsme @icedemon1314 @alstrums @suki0 @yesiamrobbysimp @supersecretsamm @maeveorsomethinggg @ivuriexo @schniti-is-in-the-house @dumbbitchenergy17 @slaydispussaylikeademon @whydoyoucare866

(make sure your can be tagged, your blog might be hidden)

[huhmiya]

CABIN NIGHT | matt sturniolo

pairing: bf!matt x f!reader

summary: where matt takes you to a cabin in the middle of the forest for a romantic evening together.

warning: smut, sub!matt, p in v, use of y/n, pet names (sweetheart, good girl, love, baby), hair pulling, protected sex

warning: smut, dom!matt, p in v, use of y/n, pet names (sweetheart, good girl, baby), hair pulling, protected sex

a/n: not my photos, on pinterest. I haven't posted for a long time, sorry about that

WORDS: 2.3k

huhmiya on wattpad

you - pink | matt- blue

-

Matt has always mentioned or asked you to come to a cabin with him, but you have always agreed and then accidentally made other plans, or he ended up having to record a YouTube video because his brother changed the timetable. As a result, you never had the opportunity.

Today, however, you both finally had the chance to go out and stay at the cabin for a few nights, just the two of you. Matt was very excited, not only because you were with him, but also because he admired a cabin in the woods where no one knew your location.

As he drove, Matt couldn't resist placing his hand on your thigh, a habit he developed when you were in the passenger seat. He never mentioned it, but once he had Chris sitting next to him in the car, and he randomly placed his hand on Chris's thigh for a few seconds, resulting in an awkward silence and Chris teasing him about it ever since. However, Matt didn't let it bother him when he was with you in the car.

The music was playing softly in the background as the two of you chatted. He glanced at you while keeping his focus on the road, and gently squeezed your thigh to get your attention. You responded with a slight hum and made eye contact before he had to turn his attention back to driving.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked, his tone gentle. "I know we finally have the time, but I don't want to pressure you. We can turn back if you'd rather not go."

He was eager to go, but unsure if you felt the same. The last thing he wanted was for you to do something you didn't truly want to do just for his sake. Your smile reassured him, and he smiled faintly in return, waiting for your response.

"Why wouldn't I want to?" you answered, watching his side profile as he drove.

He chuckled, his teeth peeking through, as if he thought you were joking. To him, it was clear that he wanted nothing more than to be in a cozy cabin in the middle of the woods with you.

"Have I not made it clear enough for you, sweetheart?" His words caused your eyes to roll, already knowing the answer.

Neither of you spoke, he simply rubbed your thigh and continued to listen to the navigation system guiding you both on the remaining distance until your arrival.

You gazed at his hands, noticing his painted fingernails matching yours, though his were starting to chip off due to his habit of scratching or biting them occasionally.

For the next hour or so, he drove until finally reaching your destination.

Upon arriving, he quickly exited the car to retrieve his belongings and opened the door for you before you could even reach for it, prompting a soft laugh from you.

"Thank you, but I could have done it myself," you said, though secretly enjoying the gesture without needing to express it.

"I prefer to make my girl feel like a princess rather than treating you like a slave," he whispered as he kissed your head before locking the car.

He would retrieve our luggage shortly, but first, he wanted to make sure the key was where it was supposed to be since no one else was around.

He found the key hidden under the plant pot, surprisingly untouched. Just as he was about to pick it up, he remembered the owner talking about some safety tips and details before he rent it.

"Would you like to relax while I grab our things, baby?" he inquired, scanning you from head to toe and smirking when he caught your gaze.

"Don't you want some assistance with that?" you asked, meeting his blue eyes as he simply shook his head in refusal.

You watched him for a moment, considering helping him, but he grabbed your arm and guided you back to your previous position beside him.

"Come on, y/n, be a good girl and listen to me. I don't need help with this," he emphasized, ensuring his words were clear. It wasn't just because he didn't want your help, but also because there were only a few bags to carry since you were both staying for three nights.

You didn't respond, choosing to stay where you were instead of entering the cabin alone. You waited while not helping him.

He made the task of carrying the bags to the cabin seem easier than it actually was. To him, it was no big deal.

He entered the cabin first, with you holding the door for him as he carried both of your belongings. He headed straight to the room, as he had looked it up online before renting it for a short period.

As he disappeared into a room, you took the opportunity to look around. Your fingertips brushed against the soft wood and door handles, trying to figure out the layout of the place.

"Are you exploring? Finding something interesting? What are you up to, love?" he asked upon returning and seeing you inspecting something, though he wasn't sure what.

He approached you and hugged you from behind, resting his head on yours as you took in the details of the room.

"Just looking around," you answered, rubbing his arm adorned with tattoos before starting to walk, yet he still kept his hands wrapped around you.

He wasn't as touchy in front of his brothers, as he never wanted to make them uncomfortable. He was more likely to show affection when the two of you were alone in his room, but he faintly worries about his brothers walking in and judging him for being clingy. However, when he knew it was just the two of you, he could truly relax and be comfortable around you.

You smiled and kissed his hand, as it was the closest thing your lips could touch. Soon after, you pulled away, causing him to watch you.

"Are you okay?" he asked, his eyes focused on you. He wanted to make sure you were alright. You simply nodded and reached into the bag to get a drink of water before putting it in the fridge.

He checked you out like he had done before entering the cabin, admiring your beauty as usual, but something about you today seemed particularly appealing to him.

Without taking any action, he simply sat down on the couch, and before long, you joined him, resting your head on his shoulder. He placed his hand on your arm and gently rubbed it. "Why do you look so stunning today? You always do, but..." His words trailed off, leaving you slightly puzzled and intrigued, but he quickly laughed it off.

After a moment of silence, he felt your fingers tracing his tattoos and readjusting his shirt after. "Could you pleasure me in some way?" he asked quietly, causing you to pull away and meet his gaze as he bit his lip.

"Could you be on top?" he pleaded, continuing to stroke your arm before kissing the tip of your nose.

"Are you being serious right now? Like, actually serious?" you questioned, to which he just gave you a stern look before responding.

"Do you want me to show you my hard cock to prove I'm serious?" he asked, his accent subtly present but not overpowering.

He leaned in and gently kissed your lips, resting his head on the armchair as you slowly straddled him.

"Do you like that, baby?" you whispered, feeling his touch tender as he eagerly tried to remove your shirt.

You broke away from the kiss before he could fully undress you, his gaze fixated on your chest.

"I'm not a fan of bras, but I do love boobs. Well, some bras, at least. They can push your boobs together and drive me wild," he confessed before you silenced him with another kiss.

He groaned and returned the kiss, his hands fumbling with your bra until he finally unclasped it.

After squeezing your breasts, he pulled away from the kiss, admiring your exposed chest that belonged to him as you were his and he was yours.

"Fuck y/n," he grinned. He was acting like a child, but he didn't care. You took off his shirt, and he let you do it.

His torso was exposed, and you ran your hand over it, feeling him harden beneath you while on the couch.

His cheeks were red, and whimpers escaped his mouth as you moved on his lap. He was needy, and you could tell.

You didn't waste any time, knowing he hated being teased but also loved it, depending on his mood. But you could see he was too horny to handle any teasing.

You slowly got off him, making him a bit worried, but then he watched as you took off his jeans, causing him to bite his lip.

His pre-cum stained his boxers, but he didn't seem to care or even notice. His legs trembled slightly with need, but they weren't shaking too much yet.

You left him in his boxers as you slowly undressed, testing his patience even though he couldn't do much.

"Y/N, please, don't make me look foolish here," he whispered, glancing at you before realizing you were testing him.

He removed his boxers on his own as he watched you shed your remaining clothes. His member throbbed, and he couldn't resist the urge to pleasure himself in that moment.

You placed your hands on his knees and then ran them up to his thighs. He caught his breath and gazed at your hands.

"Are you sure you want me to make love to you?" you asked. He nodded, but then swiftly reached for his jeans, pulling out a condom from his pocket.

"Did you anticipate this?" you teased. He just shrugged and handed you the condom. You opened it with your teeth before sliding it onto his erection.

He gasped as your hand made contact with his eager member, craving your touch.

He grinned at you before gripping your hips, guiding you to straddle him on his lap since he couldn't bear not feeling your touch on his throbbing shaft.

He ensured that you were comfortable and adjusted to his size. His eyes rolled back as he restrained himself from moaning in pleasure.

"Good girl, y/n," he stammered out, noticing the mix of pain and pleasure on your face as you slowly rocked your hips.

He tried to control his excitement so that you wouldn't experience any pain after getting accustomed to it once again, as you had done many times before, and he particularly enjoyed when you were wrapped around him.

"Oh, yes," you whispered to yourself, the pain gradually giving way to pleasure.

You began to move more vigorously, which is what he desired and enjoyed. Both of you let out sounds of pleasure.

He grabbed your hair, pulling it back, causing you to close your eyes and part your lips, feeling his strong hands in your hair.

The rougher and faster you went, the tighter he held onto your hair.

Your moans were like music to his ears, which he adored. Your mixed-up breathing, as you focused on being dominant some of the time and the other on the pleasure.

His eyes glistened with pleasure, his skin becoming moist as his cock was coated in your wetness. He could tell you were close by the way you were getting rougher while riding him on the couch, your moans growing higher in pitch.

"Are you close, sweetheart?" he asked, looking at you before pulling your hair as his orgasm built up.

You nodded, both of you covered in sweat. You pushed his hair back while continuing to ride him, his hands exploring your waist.

His eyes rolled back as you began kissing his neck, causing him to moan softly from the sensation and your movements.

"Damn, I'm going to cum if you keep teasing me like that," he whispered softly, almost inaudibly.

You felt your own orgasm building, sensing Matt's cock twitching more inside you, indicating he was close as well.

A few tears welled up in his bright blue eyes, overwhelmed by the pleasure coursing through him. He bit his lip in response to the sound of your moans, unaware that you had just reached your climax on his cock.

His eyes widened in amazement and desire, a mix of awe and lust consuming him. He felt your legs tremble slightly from the intensity of your orgasm, yet you continued to ride him with such vigor that it clouded his thoughts.

"Oh, that's it, y/n, fuck," he groaned, his hands entangled in your hair as he released into the condom.

His moans echoed louder than yours, his body arching in ecstasy as he struggled to stifle his sounds.

As you gradually slowed your movements, he finally caught his breath and was able to gaze at you intently.

"Can we do this every night while we're in the cabin?" he asked with a smirk, cheeks flushed.

"Maybe," you replied as you dismounted, leaving a trace of your essence on his member. He removed the condom, tied it off, and disposed of it in the bin.

"I can make you say yes," he says, throwing down the gauntlet. You arch an eyebrow as he winks and settles back on the couch beside you once more.

masterlist! guidelines & information! wattpad! socials!

[pvnks0ul]

༺SHIVER༻

❥ riri williams x fem!reader

summary: braiding her hair

🚨: short + overusage of the word braid, that's it!

ஐ it's no secret that Riri loves herself a good braid down! And as much as she gets cornrows & stitch braids, including the hairstyles we see in the little pics and stuff we get from the show, I refuse to believe she's tenderheaded.

ஐ riri'll be at your doorstep, in her casual wear, durag loosely hanging as she was only using it to hide the fading in her once neatly done parts, bookbag filled with overnight clothes & other supplies drawn over her shoulder, a tight smile on her face cause she knows you're about to get her right.

ஐ baby, loves being pampered!! She purposely doesn't take her hair down before coming over even when she knows you'll open the door with a lecture ready on how she should be letting her hair breathe before getting another hairstyle back to back because it'll end up with you standing over her, thighs & tummy in her face while her only contribution was to 'entertain' you by poking and grabbing at said places, scrolling through her phone when she realizes you weren't giving her a reaction and occasionally taking out a braid to speed up the process.

ஐ she'd 100% make you wait to set up the washing station(your sink) so she can set the water to the perfect temperature! No cold water at all but she doesn't want it scorching but it also needs to be mild-hot and apparently she's the only one who can get it just right so you let her take care of it.

ஐ nods in & out when you're scrubbing the shampoo into her scalp with your fingers. Tongue sliding over her chapped lips as she blinked slowly to keep herself up because It feels to much like a massage and you're sure if you didn't make her promise to rinse it all off when you were done she definitely would've signed off for the night, right there; bent over the sink.

ஐ has no problem sitting ontop a pillow on the floor, risking cheeks numbed to such an extreme that she would get up jelly legged, just so she gets to lay her head in your lap!! She's so sweet.

ஐ bites morelikenibbles you when you tap her forehead with the comb cause she didn't turn her head the right way... Only for you to pop her again.

"Damn-" Ri hisses, her hand flies up to her forehead, rubbing away at the spot, ever the drama queen.

"You really need to chill on that 'popping me with yo ugly ass comb' shit, ma."

"Did you not bite me first?" you asked before griping two strands of her coily hair, starting a new row.

She smacked her lips.

"Oh, ok."

ஐ winces when it doesn't even hurt because she likes having your attention... Huffs loudly when you don't react to her doing it after the fifth time because what if she was actually hurt?

ஐ accidentally left her phone on a table while you were washing her hair so now she has to entertain herself by messing with you until you got distracted from the braid so you had to start over, muttering something about her needing to "find somebody else to play with."

ஐ finds that "somebody else" in your thighs when she hooked her arms under them and shrugged them onto her shoulder like they were the straps of her bookbag or something and honestly once you felt your feet lift off the carpeted floor you had to pause to take it in...You didn't bother to say anything cause at least she was quiet and you were on the last braid.

ஐ you're getting down to the final steps which were to lather some mousse on each row down to the end and wrap them with the aforementioned durag that she brought over, only tying it tight enough that it would protect her hair and not prevent her from lifting it up because you knew riri would want to go look at it in the mirror before she goes to sleep.

ஐ she thanks you with her love; lots of wet kisses, sleepy waist rubs and slurred promises to make it up to you tomorrow as she drifted to sleep and you accepted them because she also thanks you by doing helping you with the assignments you haven't looked at since they were handed to you.

A/n: I think about riri so much that I daydreamed about doing her hair...she's completely infiltrated my mind, sns

[andreal831]

top ten non-main (aka not series regulars) female characters in the TVDU?

Top Ten Non-Main Female Characters

These are just my opinions who I consider TVDU's top non-main female characters. Again, I haven't watched Legacies. I've also taken out any of the series main antagonists (Celeste, Qetsiyah, Dahlia, Aurora, etc.) because they just take over the list and they were main characters in their seasons. I can do a list of my top ten main female antagonists later.

Without further ado, here are the side characters that I thought were the best additions to the show. I also cheated and did 11.

11. Lisina

Out of all of the additions to TO Season 5, Lisina was the only one I really felt had any personality or purpose outside of just being conflict for the Mikaelsons. She was the only one that felt necessary. She reminds me of Vincent in the fact that she is fiercely loyal to her faction, but she also understands how important peace is to the Quarter. She has a strong set of morals and is willing to call others out on theirs.

I don't know if Hayley was technically still the Alpha of the Crescent Wolves, but she should have past it on the Lisina since Hayley had minimal to no contact with the wolves after Season 3. The Crescent Wolves desperately needed an Alpha like Lisina. She wasn't afraid of the other factions and could stand up for them, but again, had values she wouldn't waver on. She was the Alpha the pack was sorely missing for decades. I hate that they killed her for seemingly no reason.

10. Rose-Marie

Rose really came into the show as a way to bring the Mikaelson lore, which is funny since she actually knew very little about them. But still, she remains yet another character that died too soon. It was the one ship with Damon that I felt could have been healthy because she was a very self-assured person.

Rose was loyal to a fault. It sometimes made her do problematic things, like kidnaping a teenager and physically assaulting her, but she had a good heart. She quickly grew to care for people and became protective of them. She deserved better than a life on the run.

9. Eve

Eve was one of the only wolves I initially liked in TO. She was welcoming to Hayley without expecting anything from her. She just genuinely wanted to help Hayley find her place. Her death only served to isolate Hayley more. Eve was a kind hearted person to everyone. I also love that she had no fear of the Mikaelsons and was willing to put them in their place when deserved. Eve and Hayley would have done a great job caring for the pack together. I headcanon she was the one taking care of the pack's children while all of the parents were under Marcel's curse since she was one of the only adults we knew who hadn't triggered her werewolf gene.

I will never forgive Oliver for killing her. I've heard people feel bad for Oliver for how he dies, but I didn't have an ounce of remorse. He killed Eve in cold blood for power. She deserved better. We didn't even get to see her funeral or really show people grieving her.

8. Valerie Tulle

I recently wrote about Valerie, but then I rewatched Season 7 and remembered how much I truly enjoyed her character. Her background gave a lot more depth to Stefan and Lily. She had some hard edges, but with what she went through it's expected. But every time someone needed her, she was there. Even when Caroline was being petty to her, Valerie never hesitated to help her.

7. Sage

Sage was such an interesting character that didn't get enough screen time. I honestly didn't really care either way about Finn initially. He was just kind of there. But Sage made me feel like there must be something deeper than the version of Finn we saw. She was willing to wait 900 years for him, even after he left town without her in TVD.

I even loved how they showed that she had become a harder person trying to survive all of those centuries. We were able to feel her character development even with the limited time we saw her. I wish her and Finn had more time together. One thing I don't get is why she didn't seem to try and rescue Finn at any point. I get it would have been going up against the Mikaelsons, which isn't wise. But in 900 years, I feel like she would have been desperate enough to do it.

6. Keelin Malroux

While I hate how Keelin was introduced, I loved her character. She was a strong, intelligent woman who didn't let anyone tell her what to do. Which is why I did find her and Freya to come out of nowhere a bit. But she was a great addition to the Mikaelson family. She definitely leveled Freya out a bit. I also liked that she brought Freya more into the human world. Freya was very isolated in the supernatural world and Keelin showed her there was more to the world.

I only wish we could have seen Keelin in more situations than just with Freya. I wanted to see her interact with the Mikaelsons more or with the wolves.

5. Lexi Branson

I will never forgive Damon for what he did to Lexi. She had one episode in Season 1 but brought so much with her. She showed us that vampires could feed from humans but still be good. She was such a great friend to Stefan and would have been so protective of Elena and her friends. I just loved of free and fun Lexi was.

Every time Lexi was brought back, her only concern was her friend. To the point that she saved Damon, who treated her terribly and killed her, so that Stefan wouldn't lose his brother. Honestly, she should have saved herself. But that just wasn't who she was.

4. Jenna Sommers

Jenna may be pushing it as a "side character" since she was a regular character in the first two seasons, but she wasn't a series regular. Jenna was incredible. She was so young and in school, but she took over caring for her niece and nephew when her sister died. She was one of the best parental figures on the show.

I loved that we got to see all sides of Jenna. She was still young and wanted to have fun, but at the end of the day she put the kids first. She deserved more time knowing about the supernatural world. I wish she wasn't turned, but if she had to, I wish she had more time. She would have done everything to protect Elena and Jeremy and she did. She died trying to save Elena.

3. Sheila Bennett

Another potential main character. But even with her cameos, she wasn't a series regular. Sheila was such a badass witch and I hate that Bonnie didn't have more time to learn from her. Bonnie struggled so much initially because she was doing everything on her own. If it was up to Sheila, she would have been raising Bonnie to learn how to control her magic.

I swear the writers killed her off because they knew she wouldn't have let Bonnie do half the things she did. Sheila protected her granddaughter better than anyone. Also her and Bonnie together would have just been unstoppable. I loved their relationship.

2. Sophie Deveraux

When I first watch TO, I was so surprised by Sophie's death. I thought she was a series regular. She didn't deserve what Monique did to her after she sacrificed everything for Monique. Sophie was very similar to Jenna. She was wild and free, but as soon as her family needed her, she showed up.

Sophie was such a pivotal character in Season 1. The writers moved on too fast from her and Marcel. I wanted to see that play out more. Or even just show everyone react to her death. She deserved better.

1. Gia

This one probably isn't surprising. I love Gia. She was an important character in so many ways. She is the first recruit for Marcel and Josh when they are rebuilding their community. She is pivotal to the rebuilt. To the point that she helps Marcel bring Elijah into the fold. I wanted to see more of their community. Elijah and Marcel were finally on common ground and a big part of that was because of Gia. Gia had an ability to see people for who they are. She saw Marcel and Elijah for who they truly were and what they needed. I also just loved Elijah and Gia.

I loved that the vampire faction wasn't solely revolving around the Mikaelsons at this time. Gia should have lived to help Marcel continue to rebuild. After Season 1 the factions felt very disjointed and I think having main characters in each would have helped. It never felt like the Mikaelsons were a part of the vampire faction. They were their own and the vampire faction just kind of went away until they were needed.

[thatoneandlonelyemo2005]

Some background info for this one!

The punks have this place that is like the lodge but its a car shop with a building connected to it where they all live or stay if their home isn't as good as the others

Also, they all ride motorcycles bc I said so and there just cool like that. BUT here's sprace who is the first couple to get together before Javid was even thinking about each other

-

"Do you even know how good you have it?" Race snapped. 

"What are you talking about?"

Race shook his head, Jack wouldn't know what it was like.. Or even would know about Spot or how Race feels. Jack has no idea but Race yearns, he wants, he needs more. “You wouldn’t understand!” Race yelled at him. Then he turned around and left.

He ignored his phone and planned all night long how to go up to Spot the next day. Although he was thoughtful enough that he wasn’t gonna do it in school. He was gonna do it after. 

Race parked his car in the lot and marched up to Spot at the car shop, crossing his arms, "We need to talk, Conlon." He also wasn’t trying not to think of Spot looking hot with oil stains, the other punks just staring with a look as they watched Spot walk towards him. 

Spot cleaned his hands a bit with a rag and half glaring at him as he stands up and they go a few paces away, "You know you're supposed to text me when you wanna see me. "

"Well I don't wanna do that no more. I just- I want to be able to see you when it's not the middle of the night, Sean."

Spot rolls his eyes, "Yeah well you know why we can't-" 

"Screw the labels! Haven't you've see Jack and David lately."

Spot almost hisses out. "Well just because Jackie boy doesn't care about his reputation doesn't mean I have to either. If you're not happy with this you don't have to keep seeing me."

Race eyebrows shot up, "So our time together meant nothing! What the hell did we do that for? Did you just want sex!? God maybe the labels are right, maybe you guys are nothing but horrible sex driven punks!" 

Spot clenches his teeth, genuinely hurt at the words but not wanting to show it. "It didn't mean nothing.", he almost whispered. "But I can't risk it." 

"So I'm not important enough. Will never be, it'll always be your rep first, huh, Spot?"

"You don't know what you're talking about!" He snapped, "You're not on the bottom of the food chain Racer! You'll always be safe since you're popular, I'm a punk, no one likes us!"

"Then let me help you, we can be stronger together-" 

"I first need to be strong for the others, we can't show weakness, Racer. They need someone to protect them-" 

"And who'll protect you?", Race yells, shoving him. "Who'll protect you when you do dangerous shit or insist you have to do everything alone?"

"Maybe I don't want your help! Or anyones for that matter. Maybe I want to be alone!" 

Race just stares at him for a moment, he swallows, "Alright fine then, you want to be alone then fucking be alone you punk!"

Spot is too stunned to react when Race actually reals back and punches him in the face. He wasn't sure if he'd ever done that to anyone, if he'd ever seen Race get physical instead of just mouthing people off, and he knew this was deeply personal, that he'd hurt the popular boy more than he'd even let on. "I thought we had something.", he spat before turning around and leaving Spot, now truly alone.

Spot watches as Race gets in his car, he speeds off leaving Spot on the ground. 

"Spot what's going on?!" Blink asked while running to him, "Shit your nose!" 

Spot lifted the back of his hand to his nose and there was blood. Race had finally punched him

He let Blink hand him a rag to stop the blood from getting to his clothes and walked back, not stopping at anyone's calls for him, going straight into one of the washrooms, gripping the porcelain of one of the sinks, staring at his reflection in the mirror. He felt tears well up in his eyes, his breathing getting shallow. Had he really just done that? Had he pushed the only good thing he'd had in so long away forever?

Spot slid down the wall and pulled his legs up to his chest. He felt a panic surge in him and couldn't help but wish for Race to hold him. Biting his lip as a few tears fell from his eyes. "God damnit Race!" He quickly wiped his eyes and ran out the door towards his motorcycle. 

An arm grabbed onto him and Spot turned to see Skittery. "Spot! Where the hell are you going?" 

"Yeah we got a car to fix up." Blink walked up behind him. 

Spot ripped his arm out of his grasp, "Let me go! Screw the car. I gotta find Race."

He wasn't sure if they'd assume that he was going to soak him or whatever else, but he couldn't leave Race like this, he had to... he had to go and apologize, beg him to take him back if he had to. Spot jumped on his bike and sped to the direction of Race's house, not sure if he'd be there or not, but it was at least the first place he wanted to check. Not seeing Racetrack's car he kept driving, to the one place where he hoped Race would go now.

Spot zoomed up the hill towards their spot. It was a bit out of the town but enough where they weren't so far away. As he went up the last curve he saw Race's car. Spot hit the breaks and slowed to a stop, killing the engine and started to look for him, "Race! Race please I'm sorry..."

Spot's shoulders sagged in relief when he saw Race sitting on one of the benches in the pavilion, knees pulled up to his chest. At least he was safe. Quietly, he walked to the pavilion, sitting down on a bench across from Race, not wanting to piss him off further. 

"What do you want.", snapped Race, not looking at him, instead glaring into the city after the cliff.

"To apologize."

"Maybe I don't want your apologies." Race mocked Spots words. Spot stayed silent trying to set him off. Race sniffled and rubbed his eyes. "Just yet out of here, not like you care anyways." 

"But I do care Antonio, I shouldn't have lashed out at you. I wasn't thinking. I was only thinking of myself and my reputation and I shouldn't have done that, it's wrong."

"Careful, if you keep doing that someone might think you care. You ain't getting more sex from me, if that's all you're after, so fuck off." Race just curled tighter in on himself 

Spot thought it might be time he stood up and got closer to him. That made Race look at him at least-or rather glare. He knelt down in front of Race, completely getting rid of any mask hiding his emotions, just showing how much he already missed the other boy, how he'd cried, how much he secretly loved him. "Antonio, I'm sorry, I was scared. Scared of what other people'd think of what they'd do to you. I'm not popular and I don't want you to lose what you have."

"I don't care if I lose everything! I just want you Sean!" He screamed out before thinking. The sound echoed off the ceiling a little and it gave Spot goosebumps."I-I just want you Sean." Races eyes begin to fill with tears, "I really don't care about school okay, I just wanna show off my boyfriend like Jack and David do now."

Spot scooted closer and took his hands in his. "Okay. Okay we can do that. If you really want people to know then we can start making out in the hallways startin' tomorrow." Race laughed and tugged at his hands, wanting him up on the bench. Sitting next to each other now, Race's feet on the ground again, he leant forward to finally kiss Spot again, one hand in his blond hair, the other in his leather jacket. Spot didn't hesitate a moment with kissing him back, his hands on his hips.

Race kissed him and turned his head to the side. Tightening his hold in his hair. He broke for air and kissed Spot's cheek, "Sean..." 

"Yes?" Spot kissed his jaw.

"You really mean it? Everything you said about not caring what others think." He felt anxiety spike in him. 

Spot pushed away and looked into Race's eyes, "Every word I said is true okay. I want to be with you." Race didn't answer and instantly surged forward to capture his lips into a passionate kiss.

Spot had no idea how he ever could have thought that he could live without this, without Race, without him to show him the world wasn't completely terrible and to make him feel normal, not like someone who had to hold the world together, not like a failure, just like Sean. He leaned back again, just enough so he could talk against Race's lips. "I love you, Tony." 

The other's eyes widened, but soon enough he smiled widely, hugging him close. "Love you too, you idiot."

-

@chaosfairy18 your boys are back<3

[whispersleo]

Mid-afternoon hot take:

(algo more like a vent post so proceed carefully, tw domestic abuse, suicide attempts mentioned)

If you don't have siblings, you can't truly understand the complexity of the relationship between Lucanis and Illario.

Plus If you haven't suffered domestic abuse from your parents, I don't think you can understand it either.

Listen I also like to make fun of Illario for how poorly written he is (like everything else) in Veilguard as a "villain", but I couldn't disagree more with the idea that Lucanis doesn't forgive him.

It's been seven months since I left my abusive family and I moved away from them. I'm going to have dinner with my mom today. No, I don't forgive her for anything she's done to me, but we can pretend it never happened and just talk about something else. Because she's my mom and I love her despite everything, despite the fact that she did and still does everything to make me stop loving her. But I can't and I won't, even when I don't forgive her. It's been years since I last saw my father. I know he doesn't want to see me, and I don't want to see him, and I don't forgive him. But I don't love him either. If that man turns up dead tomorrow, I couldn't care less. Maybe I would even laugh, before accompanying my sister in her grief.

I was always my parents' favorite, so my place in this comparison is more like Lucanis. I could do nothing wrong in their eyes, I was the perfect son, with excellent behavior, good grades, who loved to read and write and was very cultured when speaking. And then I stopped being that for my father when I could no longer take his side, behave as he wanted or keep my mouth shut. I stopped being the perfect son when I hit my mom back, but she stopped beating me until then. I became the same "disaster" my sister was to them, never good enough no matter if she did things right or wrong. Never good enough for the love of my father, never good enough for the little compassion of my mother. Just. Never. Enough.

My sister. My little, beautiful, smart and kind sister. I am her older brother and I always tried to protect her from the world, from the brutal fights between our parents, from their screams and their blows. I tried to protect her from the beatings that both of our parents gave to us, and we both hugged each other after one, crying, hopeless, but at the end of the day we were there and we had each other to console ourselves. Then we grew up and started fighting a lot among ourselves, shouting and hitting each other, just like we learned from our parents. We said the cruelest and most painful things in the world because only we knew each other so deeply. But at the end of the day, we would go to sleep in the same room. We would say good night to each other, and that we loved each other. When I still believed in god, we both prayed together before going to sleep. Sometimes we would sit at the table to eat with our wounds still bleeding, our eyes red from crying, our hair a mess, our lips broken from the hits, and we would laugh if any of us complained while chewing. When I shared any of my suicidal thoughts with her or said goodbye to her (god I did that so many times), she would cry, hug me, and beg me not to do it. She would convince me not to do it. If I was feeling sick or in pain, she would still cry while looking for help for me.

She is the kindest and bravest soul in the world and I have the enormous happiness of being able to call her my sister.

I firmly believe that Lucanis and Illario will never have that conversation, because my sister and I never had one. We didn't need it. Sometimes she would tell me I was mentally retarded and then listen to me talk for hours about my favorite characters and my hyperfixation at the moment, while she combed my hair with love. Sometimes I would call her a slut and then go buy her her favorite food and watch a movie -that she would choose- together.

If my sister tried to kill me, I would mutter "dumb bitch," hug her and kiss her head, and ask her where she wants to go tomorrow to buy her makeup or new clothes. Because yes you tried to hurt me, and you deeply hurt me in a way that no one else could, but I know your mind like I know my own and I know you love me as much as I love you. And I know that you would also forgive me if I hurt you like this. And we both know that so there's no need to say anything out loud.

Illario made every mistake possible and yet I believe he and Lucanis will sit down to dinner peacefully after the end of the game. They're hurt from the battle, they're in pain, but Lucanis would make some stupid comment about his eye being half closed from a blow to Illario and then Illario would hiss at him that his mouth is swollen and he looks ridiculous. And they would continue eating because Illario can't escape Lucanis' love and Lucanis can't stop loving his brother no matter what.

[rahuratna]

I finished watching JJK Season 2 Ep. 18, and it is literally not okay. I take foreverrrr when I watch a new series because I *have to* savor every moment of it. Anyways, I finished Ep. 17 on July 2, so I purposely prolonged the next episode until after Nanami’s birthday since I knew what was going to happen but ended up procrastinating longer than intended…

I’m in literal tears right now and won’t sleep well for the next three nights. This is like the hardest I’ve ever cried for a character in forever 😭 😭

Can we discuss everything Nanami talked about on that episode? I’m sorry if I’m not clear in explaining my thoughts, the enormity of the loss of a fictional man feels incredibly real. I need more closure, and I am going to be rereading your fics too after for some much needed comfort ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

Nanami expressed his exhaustion. He was so tired. He wanted to go to Malaysia and read the books he meant to read but never had the time for. Instead he chose to “[come] back over some vague reason like a job worth doing.” Here he was confiding to Haibara about his purpose, one of the biggest motifs in JJK. It feels so raw and human, how Nanami has such simple and peaceful desires but he chose to give them up without a clear reason. Did he regret it? Did Nanami have a fulfilling life? Did he sacrifice too much?

(Speaking of regrets, have you watched Attack on Titan? It’s such a big theme in that show and I can’t help but draw parallels.)

Even though he said that he did enough (more than enough I believe), he followed this up with wondering how Fushiguro and Maki and Naobito were doing. It’s like an oxymoron. The implications here… I’m actually not okay 🥹. I think this means he had fulfilled his role as a jujutsu sorcerer, but it wasn’t enough to save all of his friends. He’d always continue to look out for them. Nanami cares so much and wants to protect them, and I think this answers my first question: he didn’t regret it in the end because he did the best he could. I don’t want to come off as overlooking all of Nanami’s losses and setbacks… I just want to know if Nanami’s fulfillment, his search for his enough, outweighed all of his sacrifices. That’s the closure I’m looking for.

Rest in peace, Nanami. I wish I could tell him that he was more than enough and beyond everything we could ever ask for. I learned so much from his character, and without him, I wouldn’t have such wonderful discussions with wonderful people. 💙💙🕊️🏝️

Oh my God, that episode destroyed me. I also had to take some time to process what had happened to a character who I genuinely loved and admired so much.

I think what hurts the most is that Nanami had such simple desires. He wanted to live his simple life and enjoy little pleasures, but his desire to protect and serve others, the way his heart was all-encompassing of these few people he cared about, really led him down a different path. He cared about the world. He cared about the younger generation. He cared about his colleagues and friends and he was such a kind and genuine person. This is what makes his death all the harder to cope with.

I also wondered, for so long, why the reasons surrounding his return to being a sorcerer were so vague. The part where he expresses how 'exhausted' he was was very significant to me. The flashbacks to his time as a salaryman, and also the way he deals with Haibara's death, show a common theme. He was always tired. Tired of having to live in a world where selfishness and greed is rewarded, tired of having to run in a meaningless rat race to achieve the small peace he so desired, exhausted by all the burdens placed on the shoulders of jujutsu sorcerers, on HIS shoulders.

What you mentioned really is the answer. He was exhausted, but for a much longer time than just in the scene leading up to his death. In that scene, he asks 'haven't I done enough?' in a way that's heartbreakingly plaintive, and to me, almost childlike in its simplicity. Yes, he'd done more than enough. He knew it. And yet, his own conscience, his own body, would not let him run from duty, from the people who he felt needed him.

If the timing has been slightly different, maybe Yuuji arriving earlier, or Nanami missing Mahito, then we could speculate on what may have occurred. Maybe he would have survived, if badly injured. Maybe he would have retired and found the life he always wanted. But his duty to the world of sorcery, since his life was empty of true purpose, would probably always have sucked him back in.

On the question of regret, I know exactly what you mean. There's too much for me to put in one post, but I will say this. The only occasions when Nanami appeared truly at peace, or when he actually smiled, were occasions when he was in mortal danger (like being trapped in Mahito's domain in their second fight at the school). When he takes his glasses off and remains so cool, looks so peaceful even, he says that he has no regrets, because he chose to live a life where he could use his skills to help people. He says that their gratitude is all he needs, implying that he defines himself by how much he can help others.

I think, at the end, that Nanami's exhausted plea was the cry of a human being, as if to a parent or deity. Why me? Why do I have to suffer like this? Everyone asks that question at some point. In his case, he answers that immediately by wondering about the safety of the others. I do think that Nanami would have wanted, desperately, that peaceful life for himself. I think he would have, as an ordinary man, harbored resentment and questioned why he had to give up so much for a corrupt and greed-driven world. What he didn't regret was saving the people who he cared about, the people who inhabit that world, and that thought gives me some peace. 🧡🧡💛💛

I have watched AoT, so let me know your thoughts about sacrifice, too, and the parallels you draw. I'd love to hear them!

[lavender-romancer]

Crosses on my body

Part Three Tommy Shelby x Reader

You were a nun in Dublin but when you decided to take action against those in powerful positions in the church you had to escape. When you turn up in Birmingham and begin a relationship with Tommy Shelby will he be able to protect you from your past?

”*°•.˜”*°•. ˜”*°•. ˜”*°••°*”˜.•°*”˜.•°*”˜.•°*”˜

previous part

You studied Tommy's features as you both knelt opposite each other in the church, his eyes closed in some kind of silent meditation because you knew he didn't come here for God. For someone so plagued with sin he was so peaceful with himself or at least he seemed it. The two of you should be dead by now, learning more about his well deserved reputation. God should have smited the two of you. Why had he allowed you both to survive to meet another? Was there a higher purpose you were both meant for?

"Why do you come here with me? You don't believe in God." You asked quietly and Tommy opened his eyes.

"I think you know why." He placed a hand on yours.

"But how can you trust me like this? I expected you to lose interest in all this after maybe a few meetings or that you'd expect more. But you never do. Why is that?" Furrowing your brow you allowed yourself to enjoy his touch, so much more confident than yours.

"I enjoy being with you. Even if it's experiencing something I fundamentally disagree with, I'm in your presence and that's enough." The edges of his mouth curled into a slight smile and you nodded.

"I'm just too out of practice with all this so I can't tell what your expectations are at all." You rubbed your thumb over the back of his hand.

"I haven't got any. You expect respect from me and I respect the same back, there isn't anything else. I'm just allowing myself to experience something good for once." He placed his other hand on your cheek and your lips parted slightly, the heat rising into your stomach and up to your chest.

"Do you think anything could change that respect?" You asked timidly and he shook his head.

"I'd be surprised if anything could. I've also done awful things and when I reveal them to you it's likely you won't respect me anymore either. So we're both in a compromising position," he kept hold of your hand for the whole evening, sometimes kissing your knuckles and you could only watch and wish it could carry on forever.

But it was only a fantasy you could hope would carry on forever, the truth was that with you around be was always in danger and you couldn't cope with it.

"I need to tell you something. Something you can't tell anyone unless I ask you to," you paused and looked at Tommy. In the private room of the Garrison.

"We're alone and we hardly have to worry about snooping barmaids. What's your secret?" He asked with a cigarette dangling between his thumb and forefinger.

"I had to tell you, y-you said this was something good and I can't lie to you anymore. Well not lie, but edit the truth of it all," you hung your head.

"What's happened?" Tommy asked, still perplexed.

"I killed someone." You said simply, fidgeting with your fingers.

"Who?" He furrowed his brow.

"A man who deserved it. Regardless of my faith's views this man was pure evil. A true incarnation of Satan. He was cruel and disgusting and-"

"What did he do?" Tommy seemed even more confused at your outburst and you sat on the booth opposite him.

"Do you know about the… Magdalene laundries in Ireland?" You looked down at the table.

"Are they some Christian enterprise?" He asked, still not feeling the gravity of the situation.

"They're glorified prisons posed as reformation and rehabilitation centers. I didn't know what I was getting myself into when I was sent there. For about 10 years I was in a Donegal convent. It was wonderful and full of hope but…" you paused.

"Then you were sent to that place?" Tommy took a sip of whisky and poured you a glass.

"I was. I was told I'd be teaching the orphaned children and that I wouldn't really interact with the women that were in recovery there. But it wasn't true and I saw everything. There's only so many hours you can spout Bible verses at children before you wonder where they'll get an education." Your eyes began to water. "I let it happen, I let them hurt people and I did nothing."

"You were trying to save yourself from it all I'm sure. But this killing," he looked at you and you wiped your eyes.

"Yes, Father Michael Thomas. He was one of the cruelest men I have ever met, he would beat the women a-and pick his 'favourite student' to be with him every night that week. He flouted his power within the church as if it was something to be proud of." You burst into tears and Tommy put his hand on top of yours.

"You killed the bastard, Y/n. How can it not be God's will for you to protect innocents like children?" Tommy gave you his handkerchief.

"Because it's a sin! It's why he's hidden to me now and I'm haunted by the fucking memory of it all. It's why I'm running because I took proof with me of all the unregistered deaths and diary pages from him." You wiped your eyes and cleared your throat, trying to compose yourself.

"It would be intensely embarrassing for the Catholic Church you can't deny that, release it to the press or something and it will get out." Tommy encouraged and you shook your head.

"They're everywhere, they're in England, Scotland, Wales, fucking international too. I heard that they're in America as well. How can one person bring all that down with some truth and some verbal recount of their time in that place?" You began to massage your temples, an awful headache coming on.

"Because it's what's right and I can help you get this out effectively. It would scrutinise the pope, Catholic leaders and every damn church in the world that used these places." Tommy took both of your hands in his and looked you in the eyes. "There is no forgiving yourself if you don't try."

That mantra played over in your head the next few days, you began writing to Theresa under her pseudonym she lived with now. Telling her about your plans for the future and the information, she encouraged you with promises of her support regardless of how it would take form. God might not forgive you for committing an act forbidden in the ten commandments; it was for the greater good of God's beautiful creation of earth.

The was no hope for Roman Catholicism if this behaviour carried on with no consequences for the evil forces involved with it. Women taken from their communities for being abused, children separated from their mother's, back breaking work with no pay but most of all…the violence. The violence some nuns used, it used to scare you to no end because you knew exactly when it was going to happen. Especially when Sister Cecilia would start yelling and pull out the ruler, no one could save the women from that. Each night you would awake from night terrors of your complacency and your guilt of leaving and not saving anyone but yourself but, you had to press on. If not for the victims sake for the possible survivors.

"What's going on with you and the nun, Thomas?" Polly asked.

"Ex nun, you mean." Tommy tried to act innocent while reading the newspaper in his office.

"Oh don't play that line with me. You know that I see through it all." Polly glared at him with her dark rimmed eyes that seemed to stare into his soul.

"What do you want to know then, Pol?" Thomas folded the top of his newspaper down.

"Why are you corrupting her?" She walked to the front of his desk and placed her hands on it.

"I think you'll find she's already corrupted enough on her own." Tommy almost smiled at the thought of how fucked up you both were put together.

"She's a woman of faith, Thomas. Real faith and commitment. That doesn't just go away on a wim." Polly looked like she wanted the ceiling to cave in and crush him underneath it.

"Why do you care so much?"

"Because she could be good for this business, all the shit we're in now. Offering a more moral point of view." Polly theorised walking away from the desk and around the room.

"I agree with that. But you don't know her. Her past is just as murky as ours." Tommy sat up in his chair.

"On what level?" She looked in smug disbelief that there could be anything to the contrary of pure morality in you.

"Cardinal sins." Tommy raised his eyebrows and Polly laughed.

"That could be anything, Thomas."

"Alright I'll bite. Death. By necessity but still death." He placed his hands together on his desk and leaned forward.

"You're joking." She looked at him with an almost pleading expression and he shrugged his shoulders. "Why in God's name do all the sinners of the world end up in this city?" She groaned in exasperation before walking out of his office, fuming.

Tommy could only smile, finding you couldn't have by chance. It was meant to be, even if only to get that reaction from Polly.

You woke the next day to some post posted under your door. After you honestly to Thomas you were feeling surprisingly optimistic about your new life. This bliss was undercut when you picked up this post and saw the return address. 69 Sean Macdermott Street Lower, Our Lady of Charity. You hands began to shake, the rest of your body feeling paralysed. You stayed like that for a while, scrunching up the letter in a seizure type trance before you let out an extremely long breath and began to sob, falling to yours knees. They had found you and you knew you didn't have long.

next part Peaky blinders taglist: @queenofkings1212 @severewobblerlightdragon @cl5369 @fairypitou @stressedandbandobessed7771 @shadow-of-wonder @hipsternoionlylikeunicorns @curled-hair-red-lips @lucystivinsky1315 Series taglist: @juicyj28 @alessioayla @fmo166

[beautifulsnake2162020]

We have it all (Hualian adopted daughter fanfic) Chapter 4

Gif by shiruba-tsuki

Disclaimer: This is a work of fanfiction. I only do this for fun.

Premise: Not long after comforting a bullied girl named Meng Ai, Hua Cheng and Xie Lian find themselves adopting her and together they form a family they didn't know they had needed for awhile.

Story/Genre tags: Slice of life-ish (mainly), Family focused, Hua Cheng's houses finally become homes, there may be an overarching story but that's not the focus, Hualian being parents, Fengqing being uncles, Lang Qianqiu falling in love with someone who was raised by the Xianle squad, technically post-canon (though I haven't read the books so if there are some ooc moments please forgive me).

AO3 Link

Chapter 1, Chapter 2 , Chapter 3

Follower tags: @anonimgato1507

CW: If you are sensitive to things involving blood (it will just be discussed not shown), self-harm or self-harm adjacent things (discussed not shown) and potentially the dark side of things please proceed with caution.

Chapter 4

"Aiai, have you finished your dinner?"

"Yes mama."

"Okay, wash-up and prepare for bed."

"But mama it is still early. The sun just went down." Meng Ai whined as she helped clean the dishes.

"If you wash-up early I'll give you something."

"Oh what is it?"

"Wash-up first." Meng Ai knew that tone well enough to know that her mother did not allow any disobedience from her right now. There must be something happening tonight that she's not allowed to know about if she's being made to go to bed early.

And it must be so terrible that even her mother is scared.

She's a good girl, she doesn't want to cause her anymore pain. It's why she never told her or her father about the bullying children. She pretends not to know that they are worried about something. Something involving her going missing. She doesn't know what it is but ever since she met Hua Cheng and Xie Lian she wants to tell her that everything is going to be okay.

But she has something in her mind and has been watching the new soldiers put up protections around the shrine. So she'll just be a good girl and do as she says.

"Our soldiers have made preparations, they'll inform us when they arrive."

"I've also made a barrier around the shrine. So as long as you both stay inside you'll be fine."

"Thank you General Nan Yang and General Xuan Zhen. Have you two eaten dinner yet?"

"Oh we don't need to eat-"

"Meng Ai will wonder why you two haven't eaten yet but still have plenty of energy."

"Eh, she already knows we're not mortals." Mu Qing says non-chalantly.

"I insist Generals, think of it as my offering of gratitude to both of you. It will also save me time from repeating the story multiple times when the time we have is uncertain. Especially tonight."

"Hmm" Feng Xin takes one last look at the protections that they've placed and the positions of their soldiers.

"We've done all that we can. We're just waiting for them to show up."

"And if they show up while we are having dinner?"

"You know, our scouts are going to immediately run inside and get us. Might as well be comfortable while we still can."

"Excellent." Mu Qing follows the priestess inside. After taking one last look and running a few checks with his second-in-command Feng Xin follows them inside.

Thankfully, her cooking was a lot better than Xie Lian's.

"Hmm, maybe I should convince her to be in charge of cooking for Dianxie's temple."

"You'll have to ask permission from Xiwangmu."

"And?"

"You really are an idiot if you think Xiwangmu is going to give one of her oracles to you just because you like her cooking."

"I could use an oracle. None of my followers have that gift."

"You're supposed to give it to them you bone-head. But maybe that's all for the best since they all think the only gift you're capable of giving is D-"

"DON'T. Not now."

Mu Qing couldn't help but chuckle.

"What's so funny Fu Yao?" Meng Ai asks as her mother helps settle her in the bed.

"I'm just reminded of a mistake with massive consequences involving Nan Feng's God, Nan Yang."

"You don't have to tell her that!"

"Huh?"

"You'll find out when you're older Aiai." She herself chuckles a bit as she makes sure that Meng Ai is settled in the bed before she goes back to the kitchen area and returns with two dishes.

"Aiai asked me to ask you two which among these is the best flavor for her birthday moon cake."

"Because I can only have one flavor each year!"

"She couldn't decide between Lotus Paste and Red Bean filling. So I made a few experiments. This dish-" she puts it on the table between them.

"Has three with Lotus Paste and Three with Red Bean filling. And this dish -" She places the second dish beside the first, this time closer to Feng Xin.

"Has variations of both. Two of them with exactly half of each, Two of them with more Lotus and a touch of the red bean, and the last two are more of the red bean paste and a touch of the lotus paste."

"Can't we have all three?"

"You can't have three birthdays in one year Aiai."

"Please."

"You can get the other two if you can buy the ingredients with your own money."

"Aw." Her frustrated expression was so endearing that it made both generals laugh.

"Don't worry Meng Ai, we'll take this decision very seriously." Feng Xin says as he takes a large bite out of a red bean filled moon cake.

"We better be invited to the party."

"Of course you are Fu Yao. Both of you, and Hua Cheng and Xie Lian."

"Speaking of birthdays, here is one of your first presents." Meng Ai is given a book to her delight.

"Is this a new story mama?"

"Yes, a rare new story. Would you like me to read it to you?"

"Yes please."

______________________________________________________________

"Don't worry your Holiness, I made sure to make a few detours before going to the temple."

"Thank you Meng Zhiyuan, while we serve the Goddess who has power over life and death, I'm afraid we will need the assistance and protection of a nearby martial God if anything should happen."

Those were the last couple of things Xie Lian and Hua Cheng heard before the priest exits from a private dining area. He bows before both of them as he makes his leave.

"Good evening, Ji Huifan." He looks up at them as he hears Hua Cheng call him by the name he had thought long dead. But here on front of him was the couple the Great Mother had showed to be the best option to raise and protect Meng Ai. He just needed to do his best to convince them.

Meng Ai was innocent of the crimes he and his family had done. His sins should not deprive her of the chance to live.

"There's no need to be nervous Ji Huifan. We just want to know a few things." Xie Lian says in a calming voice.

"Of course, what would you like to know?"

"Start from the beginning." Hua Cheng says firmly.

______________________________________________________________

"Long ago, there was a beautiful Goddess named Chenxi, who loved dwelling in a place where many cultures met. She was a scholar with a natural curiosity to know more about the world beyond the lands she and her family were worshipped in. For it is well known that Gods cannot go into lands where they are neither worshipped or known."

"Why mama?"

"Gods need worshippers for them to dwell anywhere. And if they cannot have worshippers, they must at least be known by people to still have power. It is why whenever a new temple is built dedicated to a God, that God is happy."

"Oh."

"Chenxi loved meeting new Gods from other cultures. This place was the further most spot she could dwell in without depriving herself of the power of her worshippers or scholars. One day, a bright mortal man named Hou Lijie entered into her city as a scholar, and the two fell in love. But Chenxi's heart was heavy for she was born as a Goddess, and the love between a Goddess and a mortal almost always do not end well."

"Why?"

"Because the mortal almost always dies first."

"Oh." Her mother gives her a sympathetic smile.

"It's perfectly fine if you don't understand it now. Sometimes things only get clearer the older we get." In her periphery she could see that the two Generals were also paying close attention as they were snacking on the mooncakes she gave them.

"For their love to bear fruit, either they must both be mortal or both must be immortal. Chenxi asked her parents if she could give Hou Lijie a peach of immortality, for it is easier to make her beloved immortal than to make herself mortal."

"I thought the opposite would be easier."

"Aiai, the mortality that Chenxi must face isn't in the form of an avatar but her entire being. To become mortal is to enter the uncertainty of the cyle of Life, Death, and Rebirth. Chenxi cannot choose what face she will have, what body she will inhabit, or even where she will be born. And Hou Lijie loved her for who she was and she didn't want to change that."

"Hmm so what happened?" Feng Xin asks now curious and intrigued.

"Her parents refused, but Chenxi loved Hou Lijie so much that she snuck inside the orchard of her parents and gathered several peaches that granted immortality. She knew that Hou Lijie loved his family and would be upset if he were to leave them. She came to dwell in his home bearing the peaches, only to discover that her beloved had already passed. She realized then that the reason why her parents did not want to give her the peaches was because Hou Lijie was already dead. His family gathered because they were grieving. And then she realized her mistake as the family of her beloved surrounded and trapped her."

______________________________________________________________

"After they trapped her, in their grief of not wanting to lose anyone else, they gobbled up the peaches of immortality amongst themselves. But they didn't realize that it is only because of Chenxi's love for Hou Lijie that the peaches still had their power in a place where their power as Gods are not as potent. Chenxi's love was a spell on her own, and the moment she became frightened and trapped by that family, the power of the peaches was darkened."

"Darkened how?" Xie Lian asks as he took mental notes of the story.

"The peaches will still give them immortality, that is not something Chenxi could change. Normally when a peach of immortality is fed on whomever consumes it will become ethereal and more enlightened. But in this case, the family members who have eaten the peaches...while they are still immortal the curse is that only the life of anyone frightened, or in pain will satisfy them. But even then, that satisfaction will not last long and it only leads to more suffering. I...I think I don't need to say out loud what my family used to do."

Seeing that Hua Cheng and Xie Lian nodded he gathered himself for a bit to continue. He may not be able to read their expressions but no matter what they think of him he just needs to keep reminding himself that this was for his daughter.

"One of my relatives soon realized that we cannot continue to live in a place wherein our cursed immortality was present to anyone who was smart enough. So as we continued these blood rituals to keep our temporary satisfaction, we worked extremely hard to make Fu Dao into a prosperous kingdom. A kingdom's royal family doesn't need to make frequent public appearances, and only those we most trusted would know our secret. It would be easy enough to be isolated from everyone else and to hide that another effect of the curse is that all members who have partaken in it will be infertile."

"Let me guess, because when you're mortal in order to continue being on this earth you need to reproduce to pass on the family line."

"And that is no longer necessary or a concern when you are immortal. Is that right?"

"Yes, Xie Lian, you both are. I've never really liked consuming blood and when I was grown enough I endeavored to study magic of various kinds to try to find a cure for our suffering. I got tired of everyone of us taking turns to rule the Kingdom when all I wanted was to be free from our suffering."

"May I ask Ji Huifan, how did you manage to keep up appearances for so long?" Xie Lian in curiosity.

"We still continue to age - why we do I don't fully understand, but at some point those who appear elderly will take three times the amount of our regular consumption and they would be rejuvenated back into their forms as children. That's how we kept the public thinking that there were different generations ruling in our family."

"I see, but then how were you able to have a daughter?"

"I fell in love. Jing Mei was the first person who loves all parts of me and is stubborn enough to join me in my quest to find a way to remove this curse. Since she was an adept at the time she arranged for my family and I to consult an oracle asking for the cure to our suffering."

_____________________________________________________________

"What did the oracle say?" Mu Qing asks finding himself intrigued by the story. He and Feng Xin had since moved their stools closer to Jing Mei and Meng Ai. Meng Ai had since fallen asleep and Jing Mei had touched a pressure point to ensure that she would remain that way for awhile. This is the part of the story that she isn't ready to hear yet.

"Blood for blood, blood that you take will be cured by the blood that you give."

"Ominous."

"It is General Nan Yang. But I also don't blame my Goddess for giving that as a punishment. It is her daughter whom they have trapped, kept imprisoned, and tortured."

"Why didn't they just release her? They already had immortality although it is cursed." Mu Qing asks as he starts theorizing in his head. Jing Mei gives a sigh of frustration.

"I also don't know why. But after the oracle gave this answer things got worse for Chenxi. Bocheng, the patriarch of the family began interpreting it in a gruesome way. Before then, Chenxi was merely imprisoned and given the bare minimum to keep her satiated. Probably to make sure she isn't strong enough to give them another curse. After the oracle's answer to what would free them from their suffering, Bocheng began draining her of blood, feeding her blood to whomever the intended victims were before they were consumed in the family blood ritual. The worse part was because she is immortal, she too cannot be free from suffering and will carry this trauma for the rest of her immortal life."

"Fuck"

"I know. When I learned of this, I gave Ji Huifen, Meng Ai's father an ultimatum. He could continue to blindly join his family and the depraved acts they did; but in doing so I am going to completely cut ties with him and take the path of cultivation through abstinence. Or he could marry me under the blessings of Xiwangmu and get the freedom he had sought for."

There was a mutual relief shared in the telepathic bond as they both realized that Meng Ai's very existence was proof that her father had changed.

"But my Goddess loved me and did not make it easy for him. Before she allowed us to be married, she gave him two tasks. Cure himself of the curse, and free Chenxi. Obviously his grandfather's interpretation did not cure anything but merely made their relief last longer. He managed to free Chenxi and I personally nursed her back to health. In gratitude she clarified what her mother demanded from them to cure them from their suffering."

"Which was?"

______________________________________________________________

"An offering of my own blood. I won't tell you the details but Chenxi explained that by refusing to grieve we have tainted the nourishment of the peaches of immortality. It was why the more blood we consumed the shorter our relief lasted with each successive one. Had we dwelled with the discomfort of the loved one we all lost, had we learned to let go, the seemingly insatiable hunger for the lives of others while painful would also go away. But because a lot of the blood that now flows in our veins are from the blood of our victims, it is only cured by pouring them out." He takes a drink from his cup to refresh himself.

"And so I did, on front of Jing Mei, on front of all of Xiwangmu's priests and priestesses, and on front of Chenxi. They all witnessed both my blood and my grief finally pouring out." He doesn't need to see them to know that they are probably horrified. Hou Lijie while technically a cousin was more of a big brother and one of his best friends. When Hou Lijie fell in love with Chenxi he could now admit that he was jealous and didn't want to lose someone so dear to him.

Only for death to have claimed him first before Chenxi ever did.

And so he joined in the family in imprisoning and torturing her thinking that she was the cause of his death.

"The next time I woke up I no longer felt the underlying thirst to consume blood. And not long after Jing Mei and I were married with Chenxi present. I was excited to share the news with them, to tell them that I now understand the words of the oracle and that there was hope. Sure I was mortal again, but after centuries of being immortal and being satiated only with the thirst for blood drained when the victims were in fear and in pain...it was a relief that I had never thought possible. The opportunity came when it was time for another blood ritual to take place. What better time to tell them of the solution? Xiwangmu through her powers prevented me from being physically there. And it was on that night that I discovered that they had been spying on me but now they somehow believe that the cure for all of them would be to sacrifice Meng Ai, the first new life in our family in centuries. Under Xiwangmu's protection I tried to tell them and explain to them what the cure was. Then I was branded as a traitor. And so gathering everything I could, I took my family and fled from Fu Dao."

"You changed your name to Meng Zhiyuan to cover your tracks."

"More to extend my life by a little bit. When Meng Ai was born, Jiang Mei had a vision of the three of us dead. Or more specifically that she and I were dead and my grandfather personally skinning her and letting her blood pour out on Xiwangmu's altar. We panicked and Xiwangmu herself came into our dreams."

______________________________________________________________

"What did she say?"

"That as long as one parent is dead and one parent was alive, she would be safe from that cursed family." Jing Mei stood up and brushed a stray strand of hair that was covering Meng Ai's left eye. She presses a kiss to her forehead before she makes her way to her satchel.

"Chenxi knew us well enough that we wouldn't want Meng Ai to grow up with only one parent. And clarified that being a parent does not mean that there is necessarily a blood relation. So we began praying to her mother to help us find a loophole, even if it means we will only have her for the first few years of her life. Meng Ai deserves to live life to the fullest, and if it means that someone else will be her parents then so be it. After we've been fleeing from place to place Xiwangmu lead us to Hu village and told us that she has found a solution but nothing is certain yet. Then recently when Meng Ai went missing and we were worried. Xiwangmu then showed us that she was with Hua Cheng and Xie Lian. Then everything made sense."

From her bag she brings out two thicker books. And hands each one to each General.

"These copies contain the more extensive version of the story that Ji Huifen and I have personally written. I don't know how much time we have left with her - but when you feel that she is ready to know the actual story, have her read this."

"Two copies?" Feng Xin asks as Mu Qing carefully stores one magically.

"The other copy is for Hua Cheng and Xie Lian. Hopefully, if Ji Huifen is still alive, he would be able to convince them to take her in. The sooner she's with them, the safer she'll be."

"General Nan Yang." A soldier enters as Feng Xin stores the other copy magically.

"It's starting. They're using some sort of cloaking magic."

"We'll be there." He nods to Mu Qing as he makes his way out.

"Thank you again Jing Mei. Just stay inside and don't come out until we get both of you." It was obvious to him how much she and her husband loves Meng Ai. So much that they would sacrifice their life with her to ensure that she lived life to the fullest.

It reminded him of his own mother.

Filled with newfound determination he headed out and joined the ensuing battle.

AN: Wow consecutive chapters in one week! That's a personal record for me. I hope the dark subject matter and triggering potential elements weren't too painful.

Chenxi - Morning sunlight

Hou - Lord/Nobleman, Li Jie - To reason

Jing - Bright, Mei - flower (Confession: I just picked Mei because it was one of the more common female names)

Meng - Dream, Zhiyuan - Distant Ambition

[backtothefanfiction]

The Angel In The Garden of Evil | Chapter Fifteen: Me and The Devil

Summary: Angel is trying to hold the cracks together, will a meeting with the devil himself make things better?

Warnings: 18+ Only, genre typical content, threat, emotional distress, mentions of character death, angst, panic attack

Word Count: 2k

A/N: So I thought this would be two separate chapters but as I was writing the first half it didn't feel enough. We are winding towards the end now, there's only a few chapters left. I'm hoping to get the rest of the chapters finished to a better standard than what I feel this chapter has become, this weekend. Anyway, that being said I hope you still enjoy the content of this chapter.

FIFTEEN

Peter regretted it the moment he did it. His stomach turned all the way back down to the car.

“Everything okay, boss?” Miguel asked.

“Yeah.” Peter sighed as he unbuttoned his suit jacket, ready to slide himself into the car. Miguel knew he wasn’t okay, but he didn’t want to push it. If Peter responded like that it meant he didn’t want to talk about it, just move forward, but the lack of flashy metal around Peter’s finger spoke volumes.

They sat in silence all the way to the Huntsman, Peter stuck in his thoughts in the back seat. ‘Why had he done that? What happened with Felicia wasn’t Angel's fault. If anything it was his fault for not saying no all those years ago when she had first tried it on with him. Should have stuck to his guns, then the Vulture wouldn’t have seen her as a target of weakness. But both of them were right.’ He hadn’t realised it, hadn’t wanted to believe it, but Felicia had meant something to him. Sure not as much as Angel, but she was there for him. She listened to him. Yes it just started as sex, but she had become a place for him to share his feelings when he had no one. Someone who made him feel more than just the Spider. Even if it had been just an act on her side, to keep her boss happy.

Miguel watched Peter through the rear view mirror the whole way to the bar. From the way Peter looked out the window, to the way he fidgeted in his seat, Miguel knew he was conflicted. He also knew he couldn’t let Peter get out of the car and go into a room of people like this. At a time when their enemy was always circling, they needed to be strong. Peter needed to be strong.

“Boss, can I say something?” Miguel asked as he pulled up to the curb and turned off the engine. Peter didn’t say anything, but the way he met Miguel’s eyes told Miguel he was able to speak freely. “You’re better with her.” Miguel said. “You know me and Angel have never really been able to see eye to eye, but she’s good for you. You wouldn’t have the business or success you do if it wasn’t for her.” He paused for a moment to make sure Peter was listening. “If you want to end all this mess with the Vulture, you need her by your side, not against you. We know you as the Spider, but she knew you before. She knows all of your strengths and weaknesses and how to work with them. And I hate to admit it but, she knows this business better than any of us. As much as I hated Kingpin, the fact he was her Father, everything he taught her, that’s what made you successful. She made you successful. And ever since you’ve been apart both you and the business haven't been the same. She’s the one who said you should work with Hobie, not those Peaky Blinders, Kray wannabes over in London and look at you and Hobie now? It was her push for F.E.A.S.T that not only helped with our finances but actually helped the city in the way you always wanted and even kept Stacy on our side.” They sat in silence for a moment as Miguel’s words sunk in. “When she left it was like seeing a piece of you die and sure since she’s been back you’ve done nothing but struggle and feel more conflicted, always feeling like you have to watch over your shoulder for her, to protect her, but I saw her when we were downstairs with that shithead Jackson Brice. Imagine if you had that version of her by your side everyday, not hidden away. If you embraced this version of her. Can you see how much stronger you’d be? It’s the only way you can take down Toomes. Together.”

Peter’s eyes had wandered to stare at his feet as Miguel spoke, but the moment he had said ‘together’ Peter’s eyes met Miguel’s once more. Those dark, life hardened eyes, suddenly soft. The care he had developed for Peter over the years, clear on his face.

“I know you’re all cut up about Cat, we all are and we all want to avenge her, but we’ve got to be smart about this, because right now, you’re playing straight into his hands. He knows that we are all stronger together. With us all working together as a team, he doesn’t stand a chance. That’s why he went running to align himself with the Italians. He needed to have a team of his own, but the Italians are only loyal to themselves, that union is tentative at best. If we’re gonna take him down, we all need to work together.”

****

Angel sat on the end of the bed in shock. She immediately wished she’d kept her mouth shut. Wished she hadn’t said anything. Wished she’d never taken those pills. Wished she hadn’t made so many decisions. But she had. Those whole three years she wanted nothing but Peter, to be back by his side, so why was she making this so difficult. In sickness and in health. For better or worse. They’d both made those vows and now their marriage felt more irreparable than ever. 

Her breathing suddenly became laboured as the reality of their situation really sank in. She didn’t want this. Her hand clawed at her chest as panic seeped in, tears welling in her eyes as she began to sob. Alone, her wails echoed off the walls back to her ears, only making the feelings trying to burst from her chest worse. “Stupid, stupid, stupid.” she repeated to herself as her body became too heavy for her, her legs buckling as she slid off the end of the bed and onto the floor. She could barely feel the pain in her ribs now over the aching of her breaking heart. Her hand clasped over her mouth, trying to keep her breaths and wails in, trying to hold herself together again long enough to get a handle on herself. She needed to fix this. It was all her fault. She needed to fix this. She removed her hand from her mouth to let out one last guttural scream. She breathed deeply as some of the weight on her chest subsided, silent tears rolling down her cheeks as she sniffed and tried to compose herself.

She reached into her pocket for her phone, pulling up the message thread from Toomes. ‘Meet tonight. The Mill Rooftop, 8pm.’ Send.

She leaned back against the bed frame, her breathing slowly coming back into control as her plan was beginning to form. She continued to look over to Peter’s ring on the top of the side table. ‘I will fix this.’ she repeated to herself, ‘I will fix this.’

She continued to repeat the mantra to herself as she slowly stood, mustering up her strength and heading towards the adjoining ensuite and walk in wardrobe to ready herself. She touched up her makeup, adding a deadly red lip, still muttering her mantra to herself as she looked herself dead in the eyes. 

“You are the daughter of Wilson Fisk. You are the wife of Peter Parker. You’ve got this. You can fix this. You will fix this.”

----

She was grateful that between the three of them, Peter, Harry and Miguel had been moving the cars from the old house over to the parking garage here in Queens. As she climbed into the McLaren (Peter had of course got it for the use of Spider in the name), she wasn’t sure if it was from the drugs still coursing through her system or the adrenaline, but she was thankful that she was numb to the pain in her body right now. As she hit the ignition, the car rumbled to life beneath her, flooding more adrenaline through her body; and as she sat waiting for the gate at the top of the ramp to open, she began to mutter her mantra again, “I can fix this. I can fix this.”

----

She wasn’t even sure if he’d come. As she slowly made her way up the stairs of The Mill, one of her Father’s old buildings in the Kitchen, known for its drug labs and exports, she feared she’d psyched herself up in vain. As she opened the door to the rooftop, her heels echoing powerfully on the concrete, she was relieved to see him stood waiting for her in the shadows.

“Interesting choice in meeting place.” he said as he turned away from the edge to face her. “The same place your Father fell to his death.”

“Don’t play innocent Toomes, we both know you pushed him.”

“What makes you think you’d walk away when he didn’t?”

“You said it yourself,” she said as she came to a stop before him, “you just can’t seem to kill me.” 

He raised his eyebrows at her, a flash of a smirk in his eyes, a taunt, I’d happily try again. He’s cool and collected, casual even as he sits himself on the edge of the building. “So come on then, what are your terms?” She took two steps back, her arms outstretched indicating to the building. “The Mill?” He asked in confirmation.

“Peter doesn’t do drugs. You want something to chew on, we’ll sign it over to you, let you run it, but you have to respect us and you have to respect the city.”

“That’s it? Your big bargaining chip? An old dusty drug factory?”

“Be grateful I’m not asking for a pound of flesh after blowing up the hub.”

He chuckles as his head turns to look out over the city. “Aaah yes of course, why would you care about the Black Cat after she fucked your man.” She pursed her lips, trying to keep her composure as the cut smarted. “Did you a favour really.” he continued to taunt. “You should be thanking me for making that little problem go away.”

“She wasn’t a problem?” 

“Oh, really? Because I think your husband's wedding ring currently sat on that side table in your bedroom says otherwise.” Angel’s face finally fell. “Oh you didn’t think anyone knew about that? There’s a lot you don’t realise I know. Like…” he paused for dramatic effect as he drummed his fingers against his chin, “you should be a lot nicer to the people that help you. Or how about the current whereabouts of Aunt May. Or how you aren’t in a position to negotiate anything with me, after all, it’s your husband’s name that’s on your Father’s will, not yours and last time I checked, old Petey boy doesn’t negotiate with- what’s the word the Brit used? Terrorists, was it?”

“Fine, but something needs to change. Innocent people have died. They didn’t ask for this.” Angel said growing frantic.

He smirked as he stood pacing towards her. He gripped the lapels of her suit jacket, turning her with ease, holding her over the edge of the building. Her fingers gripped tightly at his wrists, her own fractured wrist smarting with the strain. He chuckled harder as he took in the look of fear on her face as she looked between him and the ground far below. “You’re right little Angel,” he sneered, “they didn’t ask for this and it doesn’t matter as this will all be over soon.” She breathed a sigh of relief as he slowly righted her again, moving her away from the edge. “I gave you a chance to make this easier Angel when I visited you after your Dad’s little ‘accident’, but instead you ran back to him and started playing house and now look at the two of you. You put your faith in the Spider and now you will watch when I make him scream. And I will make him scream.” He paused for a moment, releasing her suit from his grip and brushing it smooth again before starting to walk away.

-----------------------------------------

New chapters go live on Wednesdays and Fridays! If you want to be added to the tag list make sure you put it in writing for me. Also if you are enjoying the story don’t forget to tip me like you would your waiter by reblogging and leaving feedback and letting me know what you think!

@scmdsblog @angiexsv @thef1nalgirl @did-someone-change-my-name @sincericida @tarzinnia @liz-allyn @blacksoul09 @humxncrxvings @sunnycolors @suicide-sweetheart636 @ahryi @ms-wild-card-56

[duhragonball]

Neon Genesis Evangelion 10

It's a shitty episode, that's what this is.

Why does this episode suck? Well, we start off with Kaji taking Asuka shopping for bathing suits. She's going on a school trip to Okinawa, you see. She asks him if he went on any school trips when he was her age, and he says he couldn't because Second Impact was happening back then. Anyway, Kaji sucks and I hate him.

As it turns out, she can't even go on the stupid trip, because NERV wants the Eva pilots on standby in case of an Angel attack. You'd think this would be a standing order year-round, but Asuka is gobsmacked to find out she's not allowed to just do whatever she wants, whenever she wants. You're in the army now, kid.

Here's the thing about Asuka. I was kind of looking forward to her introduction into the story, because Rei and Shinji were practically comatose throughout the early episodes of this show. At least she would bring some energy to this thing, I thought. And she does, but mostly it's a whiny, bratty, irrational energy that gets old pretty quickly. When Misato tells Asuka she can't go on the trip, Asuka demands to know who gave the order. Well, Misato did, dummy. She's your commanding officer. When she can't argue with that, she argues with Shinji, expecting him to say something to resolve this, like he has any control over the situation. But Shinji kind of expected this to happen, so he never got excited about the trip in the first place.

This is the origin of that "so you've given up?" meme. I always took it at face value. That is, I assumed the scene was Asuka asking Shinji if he was quitting something hard, and he just casually admits that he's collapsing in the face of adversity. But the actual context is that Asuka is trying to cajole Shinji into the impossible task of getting them a furlough from their indispensable child soldier jobs. When that doesn't work, he insults his manhood, then asks Misato why they don't just find the Angels and destroy them first, so they're not always on stand-by to defend against an attack. Misato's like, kid, if we knew how to do that, don't you think we'd have already done it?

Misato points out that both Shinji and Asuka can use the downtime to catch up on their studies, seeing as their grades haven't been very good. At this, Asuka tries to claim that the school's grading system is irrelevant. Kid, just shut up. You're not gonna win this one.

Anyway, Big Rigg Mahoney sends his regards from Okinawa.

So at the base, Shinji studies, and Asuka tries to do scuba diving in the pool, since she can't do it at Okinawa. Turns out Asuka's already graduated college? She claims the physics problem Shinji is working on is easy, but her grades were poor because she hasn't learned enough Kanji to read the questions. Also Asuka wonders aloud if thermal expansion would make her bust bigger. I wasn't going to say anything, but I think the animators on this episode already made her bust bigger, because Asuka looks like Boa Hancock in this turkey.

Meanwhile, a joint NERV-SSDF mission discovers a juvenile Angel inside a volcano. This is a huge opportunity to study the things and learn more about them, so the Eva pilots are mobilized to go in and retrieve it.

Asuka insists on being the one to actually made the dive, because I guess she drank like fifteen cups of coffee before this episode started. Settle down, dammit.

Asuka is chosen to make the dive, but her Eva will have to wear this dorky looking exosuit to withstand the temperature and pressure.

Also, Asuka herself has to wear a modified plugsuit that looks like this for... some reason? It's supposed to protect her from the heat, but she's going to be surrounded by the Eva, which will also be surrounded by an exosuit. How much more protection does she need? And why does inflating the plugsuit make it safer?

Asuka whines about these intolerable conditions, until Rei offers to pilot Unit 02 in her place. Asuka quickly changes her mind, since she can't bear the thought of getting left out of the mission. Geez, she's like a toddler!

So we go on the mission, and Asuka asks if Kaji will be here to see her in action, and Misato informs her that this is none of his damn business. It's called "professionalism", Asuka, look into it.

As they prepare, Misato explains that if the Angel can't be captured, or if it matures into adult form, then they'll have to destroy it. And if they fail, the UN will blow up the whole volcano, and all of them along with it. Shinji asks who would order such extreme measures, and duh, it's his dad, the guy in charge of the whole organization.

From here, most of the episode looks like it was filmed inside a Nintendo Virtual Boy. This probably was considered pretty badass in the late 90s, but no, it looks like crap. They just keep lowering Asuka further and further down in search of this thing, and then she finds it and puts it in some kind of rectangle.

Rectangle secured, mission accomplished, OR IS IT?

Turns out the Angel hatches just as Asuka starts heading back for the surface, and the device she used to contain the Angel can't handle its adult form. Misato orders her to release it and head back to the surface as quickly as she can.

The fight sucks because you can't see anything. Asuka had a "progressive knife" when she went down, but she dropped it during the descent. So Shinji tosses down his own and she catches it and fights back, but the thing is still incredibly strong and durable, becuase it lives inside a volcano for crying out loud.

At last, Asuka remembers that conversation about thermal expansion and uses that to win. Something about diverting the coolant in her Eva while she attacks with the progressive knife, but I can't see what she's doing and I probably wouldn't understand it anyway. The Angel disintegrates... I guess? And she returns to the surface.

So Misato takes them to a hot spring near the volcano to celebrate a job well done. The girls ask Shinji to toss them a bottle of shampoo over the retaining wall, and then he hears them... tickling each other? And he gets a boner? I guess that's a joke? A plot point? Why the fuck is this in the show?

There's also a cryptic exchange between Misato and Asuka. Misato has a scar on her abdomen which she says she got during Second Impact. Asuka asks Misato if she knows about her past, and Misato does but assures Asuka that they need to put it behind them. So I guess we'll find out what that means one of these days.

And there we are. This was dumb. Most of the show was Asuka babbling like an idiot, or people watching machines lower other machines into lava. The show continues to drop all these hints and clues about the characters' backstories, but it never puts any of the pieces together. It just gets really formulaic, and I think the best evidence of this is the fact that I got mixed up while playing this DVD, and I accidentally watched Episode 11 first, thinking it was 10. So I had to go back and watch this one, but I could have just as easily skipped it, because nothing happened that had any long-term consequences.

[toastess-with-the-mostess]

Some more vf oc thoughts have attacked me today

This takes place during Brains (ep 16) as I still haven't finished the official podcast episode review for it and just listening to them talk is making me want to rant <3

It's a long one again, rant under the cut TLDR: This could've and should've been a development episode for Vince, but instead it was skirted for a vague Halloween episode >:/

Since I'm adding Anya here, there are a few changes to the episode, mainly the way Pidge is reacting to the events happening and also an extra scene Anya is silently reassuring him every time he tells Vince that the Balton's aren't zombies and is part of Vince and Pidge's group after they get separated

During the scene where Pidge uses his smart stars, Pidge takes Vince's comment harder than we see in show Vince has constantly triggered Pidge's PTSD, and then he has the nerve to insult him TWICE* by not believing Pidge knew what he was doing

*The first time happened at the start of the episode when Pidge literally begged the team not to fight the Baltons and them doing so anyway (to protect Pidge and Vince) Vince comments that he'd rather have Lance and Larmina (the most aggressive fighters) protect him than Pidge

After they escape the mall, there's an extra scene where a small group of infected attack them, except this time they're out in the open where Pidge can't pin them down He tries to figure out the best way to immobilize them, and Vince is freaking out, telling Pidge he needs actually fight them this time, making him Big Mad Before Pidge can do anything though, Anya uses her voltcom weapon (strings) to help knock the Baltons out

Now Pidge is mad at her, saying she could've used less force in dealing with them, especially since they're obviously not in their right mind Vince butts in and in not so smart wording tells Pidge that at least Anya did something instead of stand there worried about the wellbeing of their own attackers (not word for word)

This is where shit gets real, Pidge finally snaps and starts yelling at Vince how the entire time he has done nothing but bitch about his fears and stand there criticizing someone who's actually thinking through their fucked up situation instead of bulldozing through innocent people who have no reason to be attacking Voltron* or the team at all

*When they first get to Balto, Keith explicitly states that it's a Voltron friendly planet, which makes their attack and initial stealth mode super weird

Pidge doesn't get to threaten Vince for his cowardice before Anya yanks him back by the arm, threatening Pidge instead that she'd become a bigger threat to their mission than their brainwashed race currently are if he even thinks about finishing his sentence

He glares at her before stalking off near a light post where the two can still see him Vince is obviously stunned from getting verbally torn apart by his hero and tries apologizing to Anya before she stops him This next part is going to be dialogue (and some action) just because it's easier for me to type out lol

---

"I'm so sor-" "Vince," Anya cuts in, "do you know why the force takes you cadets out on missions?" "For first-hand experience?" "And to teach you guys lessons, yes. Right now, Pidge isn't in it to teach you one. Luckily for you, you've got a survivor to do it instead."

She looks over to Pidge, who's less tense but has curled into himself some as he keeps glancing at the unconscious Baltons nearby

"How much do you know about Balto?" "Well... It's one of the planets that stayed loyal to Voltron after Wade. It's your home, it's Pidge and his twin brother's home. You guys grew-"

He stops abruptly, realizing a crucial mistake in his statement,

"This isn't the real Balto. You guys watched it explode.. He watched it explode. The surviving Baltons built this metal planet in spite of what happened."

Anya sighed, remembering her own memories of the evacuation and eventually the blinding light her parents couldn't shield her from fast enough as their home was erased without a second thought. She looked back at him,

"Vince I'm not going to tell you Pidge's outburst wasn't your fault, because it absolutely was, but you also didn't mean any harm and that's what I want to talk about"

Vince looks away and almost shrinks in front of her gaze, her pitying and disappointed gaze. He should've shut his mouth when he had the chance.

"No matter where you go or who you talk to, as long as you're on the force you're going to be fighting wars and interacting with victims from all over. You're allowed to be scared, but don't start spiraling, especially if it makes you say stupid shit like you've been saying all day today."

He grimaced, he wasn't that insensitive, was he? No, he definitely was. He literally set off Pidge's PTSD and got burned because he was too busy feeding the fire.

"Voltron may be a weapon for war, don't tell the princess I said that," she adds quickly, "but the pilots instead are diplomats, the more you travel the universe the more you'll see people just like Pidge who will never stop feeling pain even if time heals their wounds."

Checking up on Pidge again, he tried to hide the tired look on his face by rubbing his eyes and messing with his visor, but he'd known she'd caught it.

"One last thing kid, be conscious of what other people have gone through. Pidge gave you multiple warnings earlier, and they were borderline explicitly telling you to back off. Not many will be blunt and list the topics they're sensitive to, they won't talk about it at all."

He nodded, grateful she'd finally stopped lecturing him. He had enough of getting in trouble for today. The only thing to do now was apologize, and hope Pidge would forgive him for being an idiot on the field this entire time.

---

I'm not going to make Vince the only person with fault here, Pidge didn't have to tear into the kid and basically beat him down for being a coward, but he did.

I added Anya into this bc I want her to be a grounding opinion for the team. Sure, they differ between themselves, but more often than not they all agree on the same course of action. Anya is a way for more outside opinions to get heard, especially because she's watching the fights instead of being in them. She's not the voice of reason, but she's the damage control while the others focus on fighting

[tragcdysewn]

@irresistiibles continued from here!!

"because keeping you alive was my responsibility, qingxuan. it always has been." he'd known that what he'd done could have ended with him being expelled from the heavens if he was caught. of course he'd known. but what did divinity matter if he had to watch his brother die a slow, agonizing death, and spend the rest of eternity living with that failure? he'd exhausted every other option available to him, and there was no other choice that he'd had that would allow him to actually succeed at his goal. "then i did what i set out to do. i can bear the consequences if it means you got to live. but i would not curse you with a worse fate than your original one, qingxuan. i would obviously have preferred for us both to survive, but if i died, he would let you go. what other purpose would he have had to harm you if i was already dead? his revenge was taken, it was all said and done, and you could go free, continue to live well." and he knew that he'd been correct about that. he knew that black water had allowed qingxuan to go unharmed, and while he knew it couldn't have been easy to watch what had become of him, she had been safe in the end, and that was all that mattered. he could move past what happened, he had faith in their ability to do that much. though he'd also been sure they would have help, rather than be wandering the mortal realm alone. but she'd done it, survived entirely on his own, and part of him had to realize that perhaps he'd underestimated his little brother all those years, thinking she needed assistance to survive after he was gone. it was a startling revelation, that perhaps he'd been wrong about a lot where qingxuan was involved. "i'm listening, qingxuan. i know you aren't a child, didi, you haven't been in a very long time." but he'd protected them like one, because there was no reason his little sister needed to be exposed to the horrors of the world. qingxuan could remain innocent their whole life, because he had done what was necessary to ensure they could simply exist in whatever way he wanted to. "no one thought you were an idiot! but i didn't want anyone to talk about you like there was something wrong with you! i don't understand it, do you think anyone in the heavens would have? how can you think i don't respect you when everything i've ever done has been for you? to ensure that you could be safe and happy?" something in him certainly had shifted as qingxuan flinched back from him, the realization that she might actually see him as someone to be afraid of, someone who might harm him. that he may have damaged his brother in some way he couldn't even begin to understand with his actions. all his efforts to protect them, and he'd somehow managed to alienate him to this level, to hurt her to the point she didn't want to be touched. his actions had somehow led to this? "what did you mean, meimei?" he asks after a moment, unsure of what else to say in response. his worries were somewhat appeased by the other reaching out to him, but the instinct had still been to pull away, and he couldn't shake the dark feeling that came with that realization. but he nods slowly in response to the others request, a long sigh escaping his lips. he moves when qingxuan does to sit next to them, letting them decide how much distance he wanted in between them for the moment. everything felt off right now, and he honestly had no idea what to do or say anymore. he nods again, agreeing silently to his sibling's request. he didn't like the idea of leaving them to potentially flounder, but at least this way he could still have a place in his life. what other option did he really have, here? "we can do that. i... i will try." he wasn't foolish enough to promise to completely change his entire outlook overnight, but attempts could be made, he could manage that much, at least.

[omegapheromone]

Hiding under a pile of blankets and clothes. I had a dream about someone extremely close to me since childhood whom I lost a couple of years ago in a really violent way and I'm suddenly mourning the fact that I will never get to smell that person's scent again.

(Vent-y rambling because I feel. Bad. It gets kinda dark so just. beware.)

We were basically joined at the hip as kids so I can still remember how it smells for now, but I'm scared that the more time passes, the less I will be able to remember it. That person was the closest person (platonically) to me for well over a decade, and I wasn't there when they left this world. One day it will have been so long that I won't be able to picture that person's unique scent in my mind anymore, and I'm mourning that alongside the loss of that person.

It was the only scent that could instantly comfort and relax me for such a long time. I was going through So Much back then. That person was the only person I ever allowed to hug or comfort me or see me cry when I wanted to die at shockingly young ages (in part because they were the only one who knew and also because everyone else had failed me basically). Their home often felt more welcoming and "like home" to me than my own ever did. Their parent practically raised me.

I can't remember if I've talked about this person on this blog before- the misce aspect of it just hit me full force now so I feel like I need somewhere to express it because the grief feels like it's eating me alive from the inside out. Normally I don't even think about it- I've managed to deal with it to an extent over these years since that person's death, but suddenly a completely fresh and new aspect of it hit me and just. Man.

I feel very vulnerable and small and like an open wound all over again. I want to hide and not be seen or perceived at all, because the only person/scent I wish could comfort me isn't here and never will be, again. I feel alone and unprotected and vulnerable which is almost ironic because out of the two of us, I was always the protective and almost "aggressive" one, confrontational if I thought that person was being wronged or hurt and so on- which probably had to do with why for years, people would perceive me as an alpha instead of an omega. I felt like I was protecting that person, since we were both victims of other people, but I guess maybe that person was protecting me far more than I ever realized. Because I feel so small and vulnerable and unprotected that even my nest doesn't feel safe enough- I want to sink into the earth's core and melt so nobody can reach me again, no matter how deep they dig. I'm scared, and really alone in a way that I don't think can be fixed, ever.

Their scent isn't even left on anything, no items, etc, even though I still own a few things that belonged to them. It's been far too many years now. They haven't touched said items in years, much less been alive to even do so. Their scent, just like they, as a person, are gone from this world forever. All because of a random act of unspeakable violence and them being the unlucky victim in the wrong place at the wrong time. I was always the physically bigger and stronger one out of the two of us, so I was supposed to protect them. It wouldn't have been the first time I would've physically fought someone because they tried to hurt that person. But I wasn't There. There was nothing I could have done. I wish I'd been in that person's place, I wish I'd been the one who died.

I'm not the one who deserved to survive and live on. I know people will disagree with that sentiment- but they don't know, how things were. Now it's just me, and I'm scared, vulnerable, and Alone.

[bitawit]

< I wish I knew more about guns so I could really write this properly. But let's practice the old "fuck it, we'll fix it in post" mentality with it. >

-#-#-

I detested firearms. I'll be happy when they finally banned them. They are brutish. They lacked finesse. It was only a step above hitting someone in the head with a rock.

I will never truly understand why someone with magic would choose the explosive brunt force of a bullet over a perfectly handcrafted spell. But I assumed it was the same reasoning people use when they choose beer over a cocktail, it ain't fancy and gets the same job done. Taste be damned.

Still, I can't deny the efficiency of the mechanism.

Which is why, despite my obvious distaste, I find myself drawing my sidearm more often than my wand.

In the grand scheme of things, the quicker a perp is subdued, the better it is for everyone involved. There are only a few spells pre-approved for our government issued firearm, which has been charmed to only fire for me and to protect itself from any attempts to remove it from my grasp.

They all have their official names, but to me they are as follows:

NapAttack, DogTreat, Stoplight, IceBath, and Chillpill.

MY favorite is Ice Bath. It's a sober up spell. Intoxicated people are unpredictable. Plus it's pretty funny when someone realizes they wasted 50 bucks at the bar and they're not even drunk anymore. Also the sobriety lasts for 8 hours and they still get the hangover. It's an extremely effective deterrent among the college crowd.

I haven't had to use Stoplight yet, but my buddy in highway patrol says they use it every day. Either to slow speeders down safely or to stop high speed chases. Only works on vehicles. When they were still working out the kinks, some kid realized the spell didn't work on Rollerblades for some reason. So for one hilarious week until they could fix and reissue our weapons, there was an insane amount of convenience stores being robbed by people wearing inline skates.

NapAttack and Chillpill are very effective deescalation spells. Chillpill is used on a lot of our mental health crisis calls, it places the individual into a non-combative subdued state. They may still be experiencing that mental health crisis, but they won't attack when someone tries to help them. NapAttack is to subdue suspects that become a danger to themselves or others, puts them right to sleep. Those spells only last five minutes each though, so we do extensive training on what to do once those individuals wake back up. But those five minutes have saved more lives than I can count.

Dogtreat is pretty self-explanatory. Turns the most aggressive backyard guardian into your best friend. And after the whole "inline skate debacle" the department covered their bases and it works on every kind of domesticated animal imaginable. From cats to cows, you've got a new best friend.

Our fish and game guys have a wider range of animals, obviously, same with animal control. But it's a useful thing and I've used it quite a few times.

Funny enough, the idea came from a letter some elementary schooler in Kalamazoo wrote to the governor. Gained a lot of traction on social media. She said animals get scared just like people and that she didn't want the police to hurt her dog if he bit them because he was scared. That kind of feel-good policy gets people reelected, and so DogTreat was born.

There were talks of adding a sixth spell, people like the idea of having a "six-shooter" on their hips. But all other spells can be done with a wand and some would be completely inappropriate coming out of the barrel of a gun.

If healing spells didn't require so much concentration, I'd love to add Bandaid to my kit. But we'll see what they come up with next.

All in all, a lot of people thought magic would fall out of favor when guns became popular. And in some parts of the world that true.

But most countries realize that battle magic than can be customized far outweighs the benefits of a bullet.

So far.

Everyone thought that the mass-production of Firearms would render Magic obsolete in battle, but Spellcasters have adapted. Instead of casting from a wand, most mages now cast from their gun.