#we all need therapy after this
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weirdchurchgirl · 3 months ago
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finally have internet for the first time since friday morning after being fortunate enough to manage evacuating appalachia... our beautiful mountains and communities are in ruins... was stuck in my house for days with no water and power they dont know when we'll have either back because we're in the sticks... im losing work because i had to leave town and i dont know what im going to do financially... im extremely lucky our home wasnt damaged but seeing the destruction of my community has certainly left an impact on me mentally that i still havent begun to process... things will never be the same after this... please keep appalachia in your thoughts
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rena-yume · 3 months ago
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Bluepoch you gave her trauma
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 1 year ago
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Thank you all for voting in the poll to decide who was going to be the leader of the band! It turned out to be such a close race!
#poorly drawn mdzs#better drawn mdzs#mdzs#madam lan#A-qing#Band AU#(Reminder that Madam Lan's design inspiration goes to Qourmet!)#Madam Lan may have been the winner per vote count but there were so many strong advocates for A-Qing!#I played around with a few versions of what the 'poll winner' art was going to be and ultimately decided I wanted them both.#As any good theater love knows though - The battle for leadership was a ruse. They *all* get a chance to be featured.#Cooperation was the real end goal! However I do think these two have the best frontman energy of the group.#Or at least 'crowd favourite' energy. I also really loved hearing what people thought their vocal styles would be like!#This was probably one of my favourite polls to do and I love drawing these characters a lot B*)#I'd love to spend a bit more time in this AU so count on me bringing it back.#One thing I keep feeling like I need to redeem myself on is Madam Lan's Translucent skirt. I have *not* done the concept justice yet.#It is such a crack-platonic ship but I want to think Madam Lan and A-Qing would enjoy each other's company.#Possibly also with JYL as well. They can be like mutually beneficial therapy dogs to each other.#Madam Lan never got to see her kids grow up into teenagers after all. She only had sons. Never daughters.#Even if she saw her kids once a month we do know she treated them with so much love and kindness.#She would bite the shit out of YZY for yelling at JYL. What a sight to see. A-Qing would also start biting (for fun).
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thetorturedlovergirl · 1 month ago
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The pain in Laszlo's voice when he tells Colin that he was his father figure kills me because, in the end, that bond created in those times is over. Colin doesn't remember him as a father and Laszlo has to live with that.
Colin will always be his child, but he’s not his father anymore.
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theshslpumpkinghost · 4 months ago
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(Warning for pink blood- If you don’t wanna see that-)
Y’all, what if this- Was David
Because like- I always assumed it was Xander, but- What if it was David-
(if it’s actually him im gonna be so happy with myself-)
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But yeah, uh- David is apparently sort of the mc which is cool- Him copying Xander’s sprite is so ahfjwuviwkvodo
DRDT is getting so good rn and Ch2 isn’t even done yet I’m so excited for the next ep-
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buggotbrain · 6 months ago
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the girls decide to drop andrea from the island
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completeoveranalysis · 8 months ago
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Thinking about how Kurogane and Fai just witnessed their son’s death, and right after now also have to deal with Mr evil guy using their daughters’ corpse to go against everything she stood for and use her goodwill as a weapon for more death and destruction ™
They're having a DAY that's for sure!
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moogghost · 4 months ago
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accept your future path wasn't yours to be chosen.
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bigmfrat · 7 months ago
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redesigned Valcour, he can change colors now based on his mood :) Slowly updating all of his old art and discord stickers with the new design also working on making myself a modern setting because he and two other of my ocs are basically homeless now. I tell you what, there's nothing I love more than making rules and laws for magical creatures and people. I love it to BITS. having so much fun with the besties
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nr1carambaceo · 10 months ago
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Raimondi is deeply growing on me its not even funny anymore
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He's so underrated bro I love him sm
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He and Caramba are such cool character like their designs and their personalities are so fun and their duo is also what is so cool about them like they went from wanting to beat eachothers ass to becoming best friends in a span of idk 20 minutes?
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theinfinitedivides · 13 days ago
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new Tayc album dropped dedicated to the friend he lost this summer and uh. hey. who the fuck let him do this to me
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syrenki · 14 days ago
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Does pretending to be fine on the outside bring you at least some sort of satisfaction? That they won’t see how bad it gets
yesss and it's so selfish and embarrassing, i keep hoping someday they'll all see right through the bullshit and then they'll say "oh my, it was so very bad all along and you never said anything? you withstood it all and never brought any attention to yourself? that's so selfless, i could never, i would have broken earlier, you are so strong. we will help you now, you deserve it now because you never asked for anything!!!" but it never happens and it never will happen and the worse it gets for me the more i put on the cheerful and selfless and carefree demeanor, i get so desperate to keep it all up because if i ever drop the act and start Acting Depressed, start wearing my arms out or stop smiling at everybody all the time, i would be acting selfish, i would be attention-seeking, i would be undeserving of any help at all since i'm simply craving attention. you see what i mean? it's all twisted but i swear there is a logic there - the more desperately i need something to change, the kinder i will act, the milder, gentler, more selfless, quieter, i have to handle it with humility because not complaining and just taking it quietly is what would make me deserving of some care, and sometimes i need it so badly that i'd do anything to deserve it. i keep thinking if i deserved it i would have already received it, only that's not how people function, people go to psychologists or tell their friends 'i'm depreseed' and that's how they get help, not through martyrdom and humility. but i do it the quiet way and the worse things get the quieter and more mellow i become and it will probably go on this way until i kill myself and then people will say "holy shit, she was always so cute and kind and pastel, nobody could have expected this, who could have had any idea?"
#to be fair it is also not entirely my fault that i don't get any help at all because i've waited months for a single psych appointment#he told me i probably have bpd and to not do any substances and also presribed me dbt therapy#then i called up all the clinics in poland that offer dbt therapy and one finally picked up after fucking weeks of ghosting they told me#i do not have a ✨ prescription code✨ refused to explain what that is and told me i should have known things like that#i booked another appointment waited two months again and was told oh yeah we cannot actually get you like a prescription for#refunded therapy#or however to translate it#we can only recommend it! okay so. thanks for the recommendation. kinda wish you would have told me that before.#and they told me i should actually go to the family doctor or whatever you call those in english#but that means a woman who has treated my entire close family for like the last 20 years or so#so yeah i won't go to someone who's known me since i was an infant to tell her. Things#mind you my family has no idea about The Things and she treats them all#and anyway the worst part of the episode was over by the time i got the family doctor info and i was just too tired to keep trying anymore#so like#it's also not entirely my fault#not 100% anyway#only maybe like 97.5%#answered#anon#holy shit i never put it all in words so concisely thank you for this anon i needed to spell this out to myself#not to mention after i would get the prescription i would still need to wait for two years for the first therapy appointment
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moeblob · 9 months ago
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Deacon loves two things: Ymber and digging himself a grave.
Fulj hates one thing: Deacon.
#my characters#waiting on some info on the next commission so i indulged in ocs today bc i doubt i will have as much time for lil comics for a bit#deacon is so devoted hes like yeah i would kill for a deity that could easily kill anything himself but yknow teehee#and fulj just did you tell him you needed therapy also does he even know youd murder in his name#deacon caught red handed haha no of course i havent told him it should be obvious enough haha.... and its in his defense not his name :c#man really does have some issues but i love him so much and hes so devoted but like. unhealthily after a while#he does in fact need a chill pill and therapy but to be fair#ymber has needed therapy for centuries and yet he just bottles it all up and suffers so#its pretty unhealthy until they yell at each other one (1) time bc they are so insecure about things and get mad over very valid reasons#but then theyre like you know what that was necessary and i still want to stay by your side if you let me#and then fulj is like dude hey sorry you seem really happy did you fu- and ymber is like no please stop there we have not#fulj just squinting cause have not is very different than will not but whatever she doesnt wanna think about that with deacon involved ew#and eventually fulj is like hey ymber im sorry to say but i really do hate deacon and i dont even know why but he makes me uncomfortable#while deacon is just. in the room. hearing this and thinking how he knows she thinks hes weird but wow that wording hurts#and ymber doesnt wanna fill in memories better forgotten by fulj which she had forcefully removed#so he just says oh well his hair and clothing are black and you had someone in the past that you might see in him and its not a pleasant en#so you know maybe its that idk#and fulj is then WHATST i was rude to him for someone i cant even remember? lame im gonna try SO HARD to be nice to him now#and deacon just still sitting there with some food like this is v awkward and i wish i could not be here for it#and later he asks ymber about who he resembled and as ymber is descibing her it clicks in deacons head and he gets really sad#that he might somehow remind fulj of the woman she loved before she was punished for loving a mortal#and he feels kinda bad pestering her so much with his curiosities about deities and he kinda gets it#the fact hes close to ymber might remind her at the core that she was once that close with a mortal if not closer#anyway story time in the tags again#im so obsessed with these peeps and i have made them suffer so much but they do all end on a happy note#its still funny and nice to me that while fulj is creeped out by deacon and doesnt like talking to him#he still expresses the most emotions to her - he tries hard to remain serious around ymber and collected and obedient at all times#and when out and about with ymber he has to be intimidating and refuses smiling but fulj?? all sunshine and smiles and emotions easy to rea#and she is just that is so weird go away i hate you
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spaceratprodigy · 10 months ago
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doodled the science club hehe 🥺 they're helping low go through a breakdown or smth
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i swear i'll finish this at some point btw
RED OHMYGODDD LOOK AT THEM!!!!!
I wish you could see the smile on my face rn omg I'M GONNA BE STARING AT THIS ALL DAY LOOOOOOONNGGGGG 💕💖😩💖💕
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captainrufflebanger · 29 days ago
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I suppose it's a bit telling that as someone who never had migraines before in their life, my emotional stress has been so bad this year I've begun having them. Brain please that is anything but helpful 🫠
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foreverxdaydreaming · 3 months ago
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#just needed to vent for a sec but oh god am i tired of people#'friends' both irl and online got me fucked up lately#mental healths been in the shitter almost nonstop this year#familys always got me up the wall#i just feel like I'm constantly treading water and i am *tired*. like so fucking TIRED#it's never enough; it's too much; no not like that; but not that either; it's all wrong wRoNg WrOnG#ik im sleep deprived and possibly pms-y and that is most certainly not helping things rn but...#gods i see less and less of a reason to get out of bed and bother with anything ever again#wtf is the purpose#i can't keep friends to save my life bc im apparently a fuckin doormat and interesting as unflavored rice or smth#how hard is it to feel like you maybe sorta kinda matter and aren't an unlovable worthless piece of shit#years of therapy; trying meds; everything under the sun.... and nothing. lows and highs and dips of every kind and yet ..nothing#and maybe im just very much in my feelings rn and just yelling into the void.. but it hurts and im tired of pretending it doesn't.#i hate how hard it is to make friends as an adult especially irl. and how gossipy and cliquey and gross and mean ppl can be#of getting called childish and naive and boring for wanting to be a decent person and having interests outside of partying#(not attacking those traits but tired of getting attacked for *not* being 'fun' enough or 'social' enuf or 'sensitive' for having feelings)#enough*#i just want to go eat drywall and stand in the rain and let it help me pretend im not crying blood rn.#like every cell in my body isn't trying to spontaneously combust.#'it gets better' ..yeah? when. when i was 14? when i was 23? when im 37? when im 55? 82? WHEN.. bc im so sick and tired#and no this isn't me writing a final note or whatever it sounds like; i just wanted to word vomit bc ive never been good w sadness#and ive got such an overwhelming amount of it rn i can't even turn it into anger & spite & use that for productivity... i just want to rot#to lie down and be covered by plants as i sleep and just slowly fade into a cloud or smth like it's a ghibli movie or wtv.#im like shaking from how stupidly emotional i feel rn. the lack of empathy these days is fuckin astounding#common sense & empathy are lacking in absolutely droves these days. some days i hate the internet & tech for its irreparable damages sm#but here we are and here it shall remain. long after us; and *long* after us ..... *sigh*#anyway ima go try to take a nap or smth. I'll see ya when i see ya. take care my lovelies#if u read all this i prob owe you a cookie lol
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